#i love byleth getting too into their job as a professor | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

fiction-box · 1 year

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Okay I know you haven't finished my other request yet so I feel a little bad about sending in another one but I am having so many thoughts about my children dsfjagdhdh

I don't wanna monopolize your time so please don't feel rushed at all!! I'm just so glad that someone is making my silly little daydreams a reality <3

Anyway, I recently got to the white heron cup on my replay of 3H which gave me some more ideas 👀 this one is with Felix and Ferdinand:

The professor chose Felix to represent the Blue Lions in the White Heron Cup, despite his very vocal protests (I did this to him on my first playthrough bc I wanted him to have the sword evade skill lmao). Reader was chosen as his practice partner. Reader was never all that passionate about dance—it was just one of those skills they had to learn as a noble—but they're realizing now that maybe it's about the partner? Bc dancing with Felix always leaves their heart racing in the best way possible

Alternatively, reader was chosen to represent the Black Eagles and the one and only Ferdinand von Aegir was assigned as their tutor/partner. Although the professor saw reader's great potential, reader, as a commoner, had never been formally trained in the dances of the nobility. During these practice sessions, reader gets annoyed at Ferdinand for being so particular about everything and for going on about the history of various dance styles. Little do they know though, that this is Ferdie's way of saying "I love you, please spend more time with me."

Feel free to go wherever your inspiration takes you!! I can't wait to see what you write :D

Sorry this took me so long! My life suddenly became quite busy, so I was unable to find the time to write for everyone. Happy October to you and all the others reading this!

I think I did a fairly good job with following your request this time, my lovely! I felt railroaded in a way that still allowed me to provide my own ideas and experiment. Your specificity made things slightly easier on me, and this was such a wonderful idea to write for! I know I say something similar to that line each time, but it's true. These prompts help me indulge in my mind and my hobby without needing to commit too hard to forging a dream out of a few strung-along thoughts.

So, after what must have been a month, here is the fulfillment to your request. My inbox is open, so anyone that wants to send anything in is invited to do so. Until then, enjoy this work!

The stories will be continued under the cut.

Felix:

“Are you considering me as our representative for the White Heron Cup?”

You paused, your walk to your dorm from the library interrupted by what sounded like Felix and Professor Byleth conversing through the walls of the training grounds.

The professor’s voice was muted, but Felix’s reply was all you needed to hear to understand what was going to happen.

“I was joking. You really couldn’t find anyone else?”

So, your teacher had chosen Felix to dance for the White Heron Cup, then? Things could have been worse. She could have elected you, instead.

As you continued your trek back to your dorm, you let out a small sigh. What reason did Professor Byleth have for choosing Felix of all people to participate. Surely there were more eager, more experienced candidates. Annette and Sylvain came to mind.

Whatever her reasons, it really was none of your concern. So long as nothing bad came of it, you were certain she knew what she was doing.

You came to the entrance of your dorm on the second floor, setting down your things on your bed with a sigh (the desk was rather messy from personal notes). Maybe you ought to clean up a bit. It would not do for someone to come into your room, what with it in such a state.

But time got away from you while you tidied up, and soon it was time for lunch. You had no classes today, which was a blessing both because you needed a break and because you needed more time to study for your upcoming certification exam the next weekend.

The trek to the dining hall was much less eventful than this morning’s small commute to your dorm. Everyone else was probably interested in eating, too. Just as you thought, upon entering, the hall was filled with students and knights squeezing in a meal before getting back to work.

You walked up to the line, grabbing your own meal and heading to find somewhere to sit. Scanning the cafeteria, you noticed Annette and Mercedes sitting together in one area, and Sylvain, Dimitri, and Ingrid were sitting together in another. There were Adrestian nobles near them, and the Golden Deer were scattered around the knights.

Maybe it would be better if you just sat alone. Interrupting anyone’s conversation would be rude, after all.

A small table near the back of the room was open, so you took a seat and began to consume your meal. It wasn’t anything special today, just something made with vegetables you suspected your own professor had harvested. Good, but not worth the breath to say so.

Not that there was much else for you to think about.

Lifting your head up, you decided to pay more attention to the people in the dining hall. People watching had always been a small hobby of yours, but getting caught doing so tended to leave you embarrassed.

There was a group of knights sitting at the table across from yours laughing about something. You wondered what it could be. Nothing to do with their job, you hoped.

Marianne and some green-haired Alliance boy were discussing something fervently. Well, it was more like the boy was talking to her and she was just nodding along. The poor girl.

And then here, coming toward you now, was Professor Manuela with her own lunch.

“Hello, dear! What are you doing back here all by yourself? Surely your friends didn’t give you the cold shoulder, now, did they?”

“Oh, no, of course not,” you assured her, “I chose to sit here of my own volition. I have a free day, and I suppose I have been choosing to spend it alone.”

She gave a small sigh, moving to sit across from you, “I hear that. Some days, a girl just needs some alone time.”

You nodded, taking another bite of your meal.

“You know, if you aren’t too busy, would you mind if I asked you a small favor? I need someone to head to the greenhouse for me and grab a few herbs for the infirmary. I just so happen to have a list with me here,” she noted, pulling out such a list from…well, you didn’t want to think about that. “Why don’t you go take a trip to collect them, hm? It would be nice and therapeutic, and I’m in no rush to get them sorted. Take your time in there and enjoy yourself, dear. Just so long as they’re in the infirmary by the end of the day, I’ll be happy.”

As she handed it to you, you accepted the scrap of paper from her hands and scanned over it with your eyes. Nothing too stressful or complicated to grab. Some of these were quite common, and the list was not long in the slightest.

“I would be happy to help! What a wonderful idea.”

Wasn’t it? You would get some much needed relaxation, and once you had more peace of mind, you could focus better on your studies.

“Wonderful! Oh, and there’s no need to let me know when you’ve finished. I’ll be in tomorrow morning to double check everything you collect.”

You finished your food, cleaning everything off the table and preparing to leave, “You can count on me, Professor! I hope the rest of your day goes well.”

Leaving the dining hall, you headed back to your room to get some gloves. It would probably be best to have some form of protection on your hands before handling any of these herbs.

What you did not expect, however, was to run into Professor Byleth instructing Felix on his dancing.

Thankfully, it seemed they hadn’t noticed you yet. Felix was moving with practiced ease as the former mercenary tipped him off on the smallest of errors. He really was doing quite well for what looked like such a simple, boring dance.

Unfortunately, you must have been staring a moment too long. Flicking her eyes away from her student, the professor’s eyes met your own

“Ah, perfect timing! I was just thinking about having someone stand in as a partner!”

Stand-in?

Before you could process what she meant, your teacher had approached you and was leading you by the arm further into their practice area.

“Professor, what are you talking about? I’ve been watching for a moment or two already; Felix was doing just fine on his own! You’ve been working for this long, and I know he’s no stranger to dancing. What is having a partner going to change?”

Quick as ever, she responded, “A partner brings life and flow into a dance. Think of it as communication; we aren’t meant to do it alone. It’s unnatural.”

“Oh…wow, I…did not expect that from you,” you managed.

“It’s something you pick up on by your third festival.”

“Okay then, I guess I don’t really have an excuse…” you began. “If it’s for the house, I’d be happy to help.”

Felix scoffed, “Don’t I get a say in this?”

“Oh?” Professor Byleth challenged, “And what is it you have to say?”

“Maybe I’d rather not be seen doing any of this? I didn’t choose to be here, and I certainly don’t need an audience.”

“Better get over it, then,” she frowned, placing you in front of him, “you’ll be having a larger audience than two people when you actually perform.”

He muttered something you couldn’t quite make out.

“Not to interrupt, Professor, but I don’t exactly know the dance he’ll be working on.”

“Oh, that. It’s just an easy foxtrot, nothing too difficult. We’re just working from the ground up, so we’re refraining from implementing other steps until he gets this down.”

“You said I had it down. An hour ago.”

“Felix, I promise you we have not been out here for half that time.”

At the professor’s count, you both began. One of your hands rested on his shoulder while the other was supported by his own hand. You followed along with ease, only slipping up twice in the countless cycles you were made out to perform.

It was strange, though. You almost felt nervous about slipping up, which was different from the nonchalant waltzing you put on with your previous partners. No matter; it was probably just because the house was relying on you both to get this right.

That, and Professor Byleth had more scrutiny in her expression than you thought possible.

Even when you thought you were getting used to the feeling, though, the butterflies never quite went away. It was a simple four step, so what was the big deal?

Actually, what was the big deal? You both had been doing this a long time, and neither of you had received so much as a comment from the professor for at least a few minutes.

You turned to look at her, still remaining in the rhythm of the dance, “Um…Felix is really good at this, professor. He looked fine before and he’s doing well now?”

She gave a tense smile, “Just making sure it stays that way. Doing “well” isn’t going to impress any judges.”

Allowing yourself a small sigh, you turned back to Felix, whose face had turned a light shade of pink. It was surprising. You didn’t think Felix would be tired just by repeating the same four-step.

“Alright, fine. We’ll go with that,” she waved her hand in the air flippantly.

You both stopped, moving apart to stretch and give your legs a small break.

“Okay, now that you two have the base steps, it’s time to incorporate the other aspects of this dance.”

You were practically pushed back into one another, the Professor relentlessly rattling off instructions.

Both of you needed a natural sway. Then, you had to maintain that while spinning continuously throughout the four-step. Relax a bit more, move closer, let your arms look more fluid.

“Thank you for cooperating, so far. The last step is to incorporate the dip at the end of each four-step cycle.”

A…dip?

Felix raised his own brow, “What?”

“What do you mean, “what?” Go on.”

You chimed in, “Professor, I don’t know what a dip is…”

Felix gave a curt nod in agreement, and the two of you waited for an explanation from your instructor.

“You genuinely have no clue what I’m talking about?”

“Would you just get to the point?” Felix scowled. “I’ve wasted enough time out here like this.”

“Maybe it just isn’t part of any traditional Faerghus dances?” you offered. “I can honestly say I have never heard of it.”

It was your professor’s turn to sigh as she put her thumb and middle finger at her temples, “This is going to take longer than I thought.”

She lifted her head, walking toward you and offering her hand, “If I may?”

You took her hand, and with that, Byleth demonstrated the whole dance you both had learned so far to Felix. Then, the time came for whatever this “dip” was.

“You’re going to have to trust me to hold onto you for this to work, do you understand?”

Hold onto me? “I’m not so sure that I do, but I do trust you.”

“Wonderful.” She then turned her head to Felix, “Now, you’ll want to end up with a sort of complimentary stance. One of your feet should be somewhat between the two of hers. This is both for balance and flow; otherwise, this next part will be awkward and unstable.”

Felix allowed himself a moment to study both of your stances, but then your teacher faced you once more and said in a voice loud enough for both of you to hear, “As for you, you’re going to lean back on my hand as I lean forward into you. You’ll keep your feet on the floor and try to balance yourself slightly throughout, but your partner will be the one supporting you. It’s my job not to let you fall.”

You nodded, hoping you understood.

“Okay. Here we go.”

Your grip on the hand holding your own tightened in nervousness as your professor began to lean you back. The further you went, the less balance you seemed to have, you noted. Fortunately, Professor Byleth stopped lowering her arm the moment before you thought you would lose your ability to balance.

“Just remember to relax,” she smiled. “You don’t need to waste energy on holding unnecessary tension. Try easing your grip on my hands and loosening your arms.”

You did so, immediately feeling a sense of ease. It was much better to hold your balance like this.

Slowly, she lifted you back onto your feet, “So there. Hopefully you were watching closely enough to understand, Felix. Now, it’s your turn.”

“Honestly, couldn’t I do this on my own? How hard can it be to bend down and rise back up?”

“Funny. Those sound like the thoughts of a runner-up. Second place is only first for losers, Felix. From the top.”

His brow furrowed as he swapped places with her.

The dance was going wonderful as usual (but that wasn’t normally usual, was it? You remembered feeling bored with your partners at the last party you attended.) until the professor made you both pause. Professor Byleth instructed him as you went through the motions of relaxing and leaning back.

But somehow, this felt different than your dance with your teacher. You knew it wasn’t just because you were being watched, either. Felix was watching you earlier, and the butterflies didn’t appear then, did they?

Perhaps it was the tinge of pink returning to his face, but…

No. No no no. Don’t even go there. He’s just tired, like I must be! You two had been dancing for quite a long time, now. The sun had made considerable progress on its trek through the sky. Not to mention…

You were certain your own cheeks were dusted a similar color.

“Excellent!” your teacher’s voice permeated your thoughts with what must have been the nicest comment on your dancing she had given all day. “Just like that!”

“Again, I-I could have done this without a partner!”

The green-haired woman brought a hand to her chin, “No, no, you have a point.” She turned to you, “Do you think you could get out of that position without Felix moving? I want him to know what this exact pose would feel like if he were actually performing.”

That could prove difficult. The only exit was turning out of his arms, which would mean letting yourself fall to the ground. You weren’t afraid of a little fall from such a short distance above the grass, but Felix would still need to shift his hand to accommodate the movement of your body weight. Not to mention there would be movement required to let go of his hand.

“Sorry,” you answered after looking around for another solution, “I just don’t see how that would be possible.”

A bit of air came from her nose as her lips pursed ever so slightly, “I feared as much. Okay you two, why don’t you come up and we’ll have Felix dance alone one final time before we call it a day?”

“Finally,” Felix groaned, lifting you back up as you quickly recovered from a twinge of vertigo.

You moved a few paces away and turned back around to watch as the professor counted Felix off. He was much more skilled at the dance than he was when you originally observed him. That was saying something since he was already skilled when you first saw him. For the swordsman to perform even better? There would be no mistaking the winner for anyone but the Blue Lion House.

At the end of it all, you said your goodbyes to your teacher and classmate. The greenhouse was still owed a visit, so you scanned over the list once more on your way there.

Maybe Manuela was right. Studying for certification exams could wait. You had already done so much today, so committing to relaxation would be a nice break.

Needless to say, you spent a lot more time with the flowers that afternoon than you had in a long time.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ferdinand:

“That wraps up our time for this morning’s class!” Professor Byleth announced. “I just have a few notes for you all, and then you’ll be free to go.”

The overall mood in the Black Eagles’ classroom seemed warm to you as the sun peeked through the windows. Sure, the seasons were meant to be getting warmer, but Garreg Mach’s central location resulted in only minute climate changes.

“Edelgard. As the leader of your house, you are expected to compel everyone to come to class. Please find a way to ensure Bernadetta arrives next time.”

“Of course,” the Adrestian heir nodded. “I will make a more compelling case in the future.”

A sigh escaped the professor, “It isn’t your fault. I would do something about it myself if Count Varley hadn't sent a notice to the Church about his…displeasure with a commoner's teaching.”

“The rest you already know. Lindhardt, don’t sleep during class…Caspar, don’t shout during class. Dorothea, remember that your seat is next to Ferdinand and not Lady Edelgard.”

As everyone packed their things to leave, Professor Byleth called you to speak with her privately.

“Good morning, Professor,” you greeted. “Was there something you needed?”

“Yes. Do you know anything about the White Heron Cup?”

“The White Heron Cup…? I think Dorothea was telling me a bit about it, earlier. Isn’t that the dance competition held before the Garreg Mach Ball each year?”

“That would be the one.”

“Good to know I’m right,” an amused look was shared between you two, “but I doubt it’s important enough to single me out and talk with me about it.”

“Correct again. For the dance, each House is to choose one representative to compete. I was just informed that I would need to pick someone last night, so I’ve done a bit of thinking.”

“A…representative? Surely you aren’t intending to choose me. I don’t even know how to dance. The most practice I have is from the festivals in my hometown, but even then I tended to sit out and watch.”

Professor Byleth began to ready her own things to leave, “I do intend to pick you. Don’t worry about that too much, though.

“No. I can’t. I refuse, actually, so you’ll just have to go and choose someone else. Have a wonderful day, Professor. Good luck find-”

You were interrupted by your teacher’s hand on your arm pulling you out of the classroom, “Glad to see you’re on board. Now, I’ve already spoken to Ferdinand about helping you learn the waltz. He agreed so quickly I almost thought I misheard him. You know him, though; always ready to do something elegant and noble. Like helping a lady learn to dance.”

“Ow! Wait, you can’t be serious-!”

As you approached the practice area Professor Byleth cleared for the two of you earlier, Ferdinand was already waiting.

“I expect you to know the dance well enough to perform by tomorrow. It’s rather simple, so I can’t see you having any trouble with it.”

“Tomorrow?”

“It will be no problem, Professor! She will practically be an expert by nightfall, I assure you!”

“Nightfall?”

She practically already took her leave, “Well then, I’ll leave you to it.”

“Shall we begin?” Ferdinand turned to you with a small bow, offering his hand.

It all happened so fast you almost thought you had dreamt up the whole encounter, “Begin? I…I’ve never danced before. Not in a way that counts.”

“There is no need to be nervous. We can start slow, and I will tell you everything you need to know!”

You took his hand, and the lesson commenced. He positioned you so that one of your arms rested on his shoulder while the other was held out to your side. Apparently, men led forward with the right foot, so it was your job to lead backwards with your left foot. Back, left, forward, right. A simple box.

But there were other things you needed to remember. The two of you always spun in a circle. Ferdinand always took the same stride, which you would have to match in length to avoid stepping on him.

It all felt like too much, in the moment. Your results were not poor, so long as you gave all your energy to your awareness of your body.

“You are a natural! Surely you have performed this waltz before?”

At the shake of your head, he continued, “Perhaps you are aware of its history, then? This dance was originally created…”

That wasn’t good. Back. Left. It took practically every nerve in your brain to manage shaking your head while staying in the waltz. Now he wanted to ramble about its history? You’d never be able to pay attention…Forward. Right…and learn well simultaneously. Why did he care how good you were at picking it up, anyway?

None of it mattered. There was no way you were going to stay here listening to him go on until nightfall. You would dance until he said you had it down, and then it would be time to leave.

However, with how caught up you were in your thoughts, you hadn’t realized how that affected your dancing.

“S-slow down! It is a dance, not a race!”

“Oh. Sorry,” you weren’t sure if you meant it. “I can’t really focus on what I’m doing when you’re giving me all this information.”

Hopefully, he could take a hint, you thought. But if Ferdinand von Aegir was anything, he was dense. He did not take hints, and throughout your time at the Officer’s Academy, you’ve constantly found yourself cursing him for it.

“That is alright. I am sure you will get it eventually,” the two of you finally managed to bring the tempo back to normal. “After all, this is quite a late age to be learning formal dance for the first time. In fact, I myself began my first lessons when I was…”

Wonderful. Honestly, did the noble do anything but talk? You were sure he heard you when you spoke, but he never actually listened to what you were saying.

Back. Left. Forward. Right. Always spin ever so slightly. Do not step on Ferdinand’s feet. Lead with your left unless you’re moving right. Your arms-

“...that is how the White Heron Ball came to be a Garreg Mach tradition! Interesting, is it not?”

“Wh-what?” just how long had you been dancing? You could have sworn he was just talking about his own history of dance.

“What is it? Is there something wrong?

Back. Ri- no…Left. Forward. “Ferdinand, I don’t know how to put this lightly, but it is really hard to focus with you talking about all of that. I can keep up a conversation, or I can dance. I can’t do both yet.”

“But as I have told you, it is easy! You simply need to count through the beats, match each step to a number, and then keep continual rules in mind.”

At this point, you had lost the rhythm of your waltz. The heel of your boot landed on the toe of Ferdinand’s own, and the two of you stumbled awkwardly until Ferdinand caught his balance. Unfortunately, you weren’t as lucky and fell backwards onto the ground.

“Not quite like that-”

“You don’t say?” you cut him off. At least he was kind enough to help you back to your feet.

He brought you back into your initial position, preparing to pick up again, “Remember to lead backwards with your left foot.”

“I was remembering. Until you distracted me, that is.”

“Distracted you? I have only been helping you this whole time, have I not?”

You took a breath. It would be so easy to blame him for this, but you knew nothing would be solved through an argument. The sooner you figured this out, the sooner you could leave. No reason to hurt one of your allies over it.

“You’re right. I’m sorry, I’m just a little frustrated.”

The Adrestian noble began again, prompting you to follow suit almost immediately, “You must adjust your steps to that of your partner’s.”

A frown painted itself on your lips, “Good thing I won’t ever have one.”

“What are you talking about?” he questioned, “This waltz is commonly played at various events. Surely this will not be the only time you will partake?”

You sighed, “Ferdinand, enough. I’m a commoner, remember? I don’t go to…events. We don’t even have dances like this.”

“All the more reason to learn! It would be helpful to incorporate this into the skills of the common people so as to create a more refined society as a whole. Then-”

“I said enough!” you snapped, pushing away from him.

The shock on his face was nothing compared to the anger you felt at his ignorance.

“E-excuse me?”

“Stop talking about commoners like they’re…beasts! We are not animals to be tamed, Ferdinand, we’re people. Real, actual people.”

“I was not trying to imply otherwise-”

“But you did. You do it all the time! Humanity is not found solely within tradition, noble or otherwise. We can be civilized without being formal, you know!”

He didn’t seem to know what to say anymore, it seemed. Good, then. Maybe he would choose to listen for once.

“Take this practice as an example. You’ve been doing this waltz with me for how long now? And I haven’t hurt you or acted without considering you this whole time.” You paused, your throat closing up, “Honestly, I’ve been pitying us both for this position we’ve been placed in. Is an uncivilized, unrefined society capable of pity, Lord Ferdinand von Aegir?”

Nothing. Again. Maybe this was too much? But it wasn’t as if you were going to let him keep talking like that.

You stepped back farther, “Sorry. Here I go ruining it. I talk about being civilized, but I can’t even keep myself in check to verbally defend the people I grew up knowing and loving. Let’s…we can be done, now. I’ll go find the professor and tell her I won’t be able to perform tomorrow.”

So much for relations between allies. Your mind wandered to what you were going to say to your professor. It would be a bad idea to blame it on Ferdinand; Professor Byleth might do some digging, and you didn’t trust him to keep his mouth shut.

‘W-wait!” you had only made it a few paces before the knight called after you.

As you turned to face him, you gave a tight lipped smile, “Don’t worry about it! Really, I’m sure it won’t be any trouble for her to find someone else. I can probably talk Dorothea into it if she isn’t already interested.”

“That is no excuse. Whether you are our representative or someone else is, that does not make up for the things I said,” regret filled his expression, and your own turn came to respond in silence.

He made his way toward where you were standing, his eyes never leaving yours, “I am deeply sorry. I truly did not mean to insinuate such terrible ideas. Perhaps you can help me to…be more aware of these things in the future?”

At last, he had listened to something you told him. Even if he didn’t pay much attention to anything else you said to him, you were glad he at least chose to react to this.

“Of course,” your smile went from tight lipped to full and genuine. “You could start by focusing on teaching me the dance rather than its significance.”

“But both are equally important!” he argued.

“Are they? I am going to have to know this dance for the competition, but I can’t imagine any future where I would need to know the history of it. Or that of any other waltzes, for that matter.”

As soon as the words came out of your mouth, something in his face seemed to fall.

“You…cannot? There is no future where you would see yourself dancing more waltzes?”

“Quite frankly, it doesn’t seem to matter what I imagine. Once my time here is through, I’ll be sent off to lead some noble army. Not much waltzing in that future, I’d guess.”

“I see…”

Why was he acting so weird?

“But,” you tried to cheer him up, “at least I’ll have this one. I can pretend for one night that I have the ability to choose my future. So long as I would be happy in it, I don’t see the problem in dreaming of a life where all I do is dance at formal events like this.”

“Really?”

“Sure!” you laughed, “Though I don’t think I’d be as comfortable dancing with anyone else. I might not be able to get used to a different rhythm, yet.”

That seemed to get his energy back, “Of course! I will be ready whenever you wish to dance, and we can go at whatever pace you wish.”

“Let’s make sure I can actually do the steps correctly, first?”

“Right,” he led you back to the practice area.

The two of you danced a few more times before you finally got the hang of the waltz. Sure, the ball was not for another several days, but you had a feeling Professor Byleth would be pleased with your progress.

Eventually, when the time came, you knew you would need to learn a new dance for your classmates.

But you were getting ahead of yourself. First, you needed to win the White Heron Cup.

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bi-leth-eisner · 2 years

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Damn, remember that kid in Abyss who asks if Byleth killed people? And if you say yes, he says bad people right? ... "We're gonna fight. We're gonna avenge the Captain!" "Getz, No! This can't be happening!" "It's just one merc! Why am I so scared!?" "Did my life... ever have meaning?" He is shocked when you say no, and for good reason. Now I know why Byleth canonically hates their title, as the Ashen Demon kills any who oppose them in their job. Good people like them, in a life or death fight...

(Last quote is when Shez bites it in Classic mode. Considering the implications back in the original houses, perhaps that is all too common in Byleth's line of work. No wonder they love being a teacher, as they nurture futures in students, rather then ending them in rival mercenaries)

the “Ashen Demon” moniker sounded pretty badass when i was first getting into Three Houses, but after reading that Byleth themself doesn’t like it? goodness, now it hurts seeing them get called that. going from being called “Demon” to getting called “Professor” must’ve been like a huge weight off their shoulders, it’s no wonder they stayed with the class they taught. they’re probably the first people (either in a long while, or first, period) to acknowledge in any way that they’re human, too.

#asks #byleth eisner #ok this is just a hc but IMAGINE them trying to live up to the moniker even though theyre uncomfortable #so they repress their emotions throughout Sothis’ slumber and during their time at the monastery they finally let loose #and like have big bursts of happiness and anger and sadness and fear #and they revel in every second because they can stop holding back #and when they approach that little Abyssian boy and he asks them ‘‘do you kill people?’’ they just. freeze.#their heart drops and their breath is hitched. do they tell the truth? the truth theyre uncomfortable with?#‘yes.’#‘only bad people‚ right?’#Goddess they would bawl their eyes out right then and there methinks

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lananiscorner · 2 years

Note

While I also think Byleth needed full voice acting to be good, I also think you're giving way too much credit to Shez here. As others have said before me, having more voiced lines didn't make Shez better written. The revenge plot is dropped fairly early in Hopes: Shez says multiple times that he doesn't care about it - it's Arval who wants to attack Sothis. Shez even tells Arval it's not worth it/maybe they're too gung ho into this. So Shez doesn't have the revenge plot as a trait much (1)

Shez also has no character arc whatsoever in Hopes. Byleth has an arc: a cold, emotionless mercenary turned professor who loves helping their students, who helps to aid during a war, can either become the new archbishop or leader of Fodlan - or have negative growth and revert back to their Ashen Demon ways and go back to killing. That's definitely a number of arcs for Byleth in 3H. In Hopes, Shez is basically just a go with the flow character who has little input for anything at all (2)

And that ignores the elephant in the room: we know almost nothing about Shez beyond that they're a mercenary raised by a mysterious woman/adoptive mom. Everything about them is kept to the mystery that's never resolved and it just makes Shez feel like an incomplete characters who already lacks a true character arc as is. Having fully voice acting works - until you see how lacking Shez was in every other aspect. It's hard to say Shez even matters in their debut game at all (3)

Thanks for your ask, anon, and sorry it took me a while to get back to this--I spent the last week barely alive thanks to being at Gamescom and applying for a new job. Pre-emptive caveat here that I have not played 3 Hopes, only observed it from the sidelines through posts by my mutuals.

I'll admit that maybe I gave Shez too much credit in terms of actual characterization/character development across the game, but in a way that only makes Byleth worse, imo, because even a character who is apparently still written so shoddily still feels like more of an actual character rather than some weird mix between a character and a self-insert that's neither fish nor fowl, and that's just sad. Maybe it really is just the voice acting (again--Byleth is neither fish nor fowl here--they clearly hired two VAs for the battle lines, yet could not be arsed to hire them for the actual dialogue lines in 3 Houses), or maybe it's just the fact that so much of how 3 Houses actually plays out squanders the narrative potential Byleth had (e.g. what you mentioned about Byleth either growing into a position of continental leadership or regressing to being a mercenary--it's definitely there, but it has next to no emotional impact, because Byleth themselves wrestles so little with those ideas especially in routes that are not SS).

So as sad as it is, even with what little I know of Shez, they already feel like more of a character than Byleth to me.

#asks #anon #Fire Emblem Warriors: Three Hopes #FE WTH #3 Hopes spoilers #Shez #Shez Fire Emblem

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lochnessies · 3 years

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ok here’s a dissection of a post an anon sent me the link to and bc i have the worst time management possible and i completely forgot i had it lol so sorry anon here you go ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜

I am constantly thinking about how Edelgard just doesn’t seem designed to appeal to cishet men.

i hate to be the one to break this news to you op but just because a character doesn’t show skin like charlotte fire emblem doesn’t mean she isn’t designed to pander to men. she’s very much designed to pander to the (majority straight male) player base with her ‘uwu i only trust you professor omg did u see that rat? pls don’t look at my painting of you uwu’.

then there’s the whole edelgard c support in japanese where byleth makes reference to having come to her room for ‘yobi’ which is

there’s also the scene where byleth can make an unsolicited comment about edelgard’s breast size. which is… uhh… gross.

edelgard also has cipher cards that go from slightly fanserviceie to full on suggestive

and also her breast armor that my sister relentlessly mocked lol

and here’s a chart from the 3h subreddit about gender/sexually in regards to edelgard and edeleth. it’s extremely straight male. op might have just overlooked this since they probably don’t go on reddit and stay on tumblr (which unlike reddit is mostly female and has a high lgbt demographic).

Like the joke is that Bleagles is the Gay House, but everything about her feels deliberately non-hetero.

i don’t like where this is going…

She’s dressed in sharp outfits covering her upper body, with proportions that don’t seem exaggerated.

so women who cover up must be lgbt because straight women are naturally more revealing? oh y i k e s

Her poise and the way she effortlessly flourishes her axe exhibits an air of coolness. While titties out =/= character of no substance, Edelgard being dressed more modestly suggests that she wasn’t designed with male-centred fanservice in mind.

“titties don’t equal no substance but here’s my post on how she has more substance because she doesn’t show titties” ok

And she still looks absolutely stunning in her more modest attire (like seriously, I haven’t felt the need to return to cosplay in years but I want to do her academy look so bad).

yes she does. amazing design 10/10. i have a feeling this is the only part i’m going to agree with

Edelgard is intense. She does not mince her words and she is constantly evaluating you. Though she tries, she has a difficult time understanding her peers initially. Early on, she talks about how she would sacrifice herself and others in the name of some greater good. She is terrible at communicating with her peers. She has to be seen as infallible. Her heart has been hardened for years and she assumes she has to stay that way. She also assumes everyone mourns the same way she does - which is why she (kind of insensitively) insists you move on when Jeralt dies. Because to her, grief has to be channeled towards action, or else you’ll get lost in it. This attitude is demonstrated time and time again as she presses on. It can make her come off as cold and unfeeling - but look closer, and she’s anything but.

don’t really have anything to say at this part. it is pretty on the nose though i would slightly disagree with that last sentence a bit. i wouldn’t say she’s as i feeling as hubert is but all of her talks of the war boil down to how she feels and never her victims.

Her story is ultimately about her realizing that to achieve her goals, she needs to let people in and allow herself to want things like cakes and tea parties and lazy days in peace.

????? what ????? her goals include imperialism, ethnic and religious targeting. her story is about having a set of beliefs and mowing down anybody who stands in her way. that has nothing to do with tea, friends, and lazy days. also am i supposed to be sad that she has to get up everyday and work? i do that and i didn’t start a war and only throw a pity party for myself

The game leaves the player guessing as to how involved the Flame Emperor was in each Part I event, makes you feel hurt by her betrayal, and leaves you with a choice: do you follow the orders of the woman who tried to make you a god without your consent, or a young girl with questionable morals about to throw the world into upheaval?

this isn’t an ideal situation but i think i’m going to stick with the woman who tried to make me a god since i’m not selfish and i know it’s not only my desires and life at stake here. plus the green hair slaps ngl

Choosing her of your own volition (not for completionist reasons) requires the basic ability to sympathize with a woman’s pain. It also requires the player to read beyond her unwavering will and dubious methods to get a sense of how deep that pain goes and how the theme of humanity relates to her differently in each route.

i’m not going to touch this since @nilsh13 made a post on it that i’ll link here. i agree with everything he said so to repeat it would be redundant.

The player must be able to see a young woman’s desperate resolve to change the world so it stops exploiting people and ruining lives. They must be able to accept the fact that women can make the same morally wrong and ambivalent decisions that complicated male characters get to make all the time and still be the one to root for.

literally the same reason i love rhea lol her goddess experiments are dubious at best but her reasons are the same you mentioned. i would say that i like this quality in edelgard too if her ending, while bloody, actually ended in a good outcome for fodlan.

This is not unique to LGBT+ people, but this population is likely to understand why Edelgard feels so strongly about why she has to change the system.

i understand wanting to change a system, i really do. like edelgard, i’m an opinionated bisexual woman (who’s also physically disabled) so yeah i get it. and change can be good but it can also be terrible. even if the church was the boogeyman edelgard treats it as she still replaces it with her own shit regime. so it’s the same circus just with a new conductor.

I don’t think “Edelgard gets undue criticism because she’s a woman” captures the full picture. An important aspect of her treatment by certain parts of the fandom is that she’s a radical woman.

or maybe she does some pretty fucked up shit and it goes unacknowledged in her own route. and yeah she’s radical but in all the worst ways.

Her hatred of the Church and the Crest system resonates way harder with people who have been hurt by institutions that are deeply engrained in our society.

and what about people who have been hurt by systems where their ‘merit’ didn’t measure up and they were left behind? what about people from nations that experienced imperialism?

Siding with her means siding against the Church - which, while different from real world religious institutions, still invokes language about “sin” and “punishment.

yeah the ‘sins’ and ‘punishments’ are used in relation to attempted murders which i think everybody can agree is a bad thing that needs to be condemned.

Choosing Edelgard will likely hit different if homophobic and transphobic Christians used that rhetoric against you.

it has literally nothing to do with ‘sins’ and ‘punishments’ in regards to being gay or trans. that’s you projecting. especially since the church has 2 canon gay characters and two coded ones.

like i can understand why having a church condemn you can be uncomfortable but i’m begging you to please look at the context of what’s happening.

I’m willing to go out on a limb and say that the reason F/F Edeleth is the more popular iteration of that ship because most people who would choose to S-support Edelgard are LGBT+ themselves. This is not a revelation. To anyone in the community, it’s fairly obvious.

i was talking to nilish and he said

so yeah… while there is definitely sapphic femleth shippers out there, there’s still a whole lot of weird fetishizing going on from straight men about edelgard.

Crimson Flower was my first route. I went into the game knowing absolutely nothing. I played it during the last week of 2020 and hoo boy was it cathartic.

i can tell. this wasn’t supposed to be a dig but it came out that way and i’m not taking it out.

I felt like I was living out a gay revolution power fantasy, where I could truly change systems of oppression while fighting alongside a group of troubled students I’d shaped the lives of.

so a gay revolution power fantasy (cringe) goes hand in hand with imperialism and installing a dictatorship? also the war had nothing to do with sexuality.

Through your unwavering support, Edelgard learns that she needs to be human, that she must listen to her friends, and that she’s allowed to enjoy the world she’s creating.

edelgard gets to learn how to be human all while hunting those who don’t. and she doesn’t listen fo her friends. she doesn’t even trust them. she’s willing to talk to byleth but keep the people who’s been by her side for five years in the dark about everything. and yeah she gets to enjoy her new words since she’s on top. hate to be a commoner under her rule after she burned down my village in her war.

I love this character so much.

clearly. and i honestly don’t care if somebody likes her. i do as well even if my sometimes scathing words can make it seem otherwise.

It has been six months since I first played and I am still analyzing her,

me too. please help me escape i’m losing my mind

because there’s so much depth. Yet so many people fail to see that depth and dismiss her as evil,

i mean, she does some fucked up shit that goes beyond any of the less than desirable actions of the other main characters and does an extremely poor job in trying to make herself seem innocent. i personally don’t think she’s pure evil but i completely understand where the people who say she is are coming from.

because they never had the will to understand complicated women in the first place.

that’s big talk from somebody who implies that a gay pope is comparable to homophobic and transphobic irl religions and that leads an oppressive regime all because she uses the vague terms of sin and punishments that you have to gay power fantasy your way out of

#i finished this at 1am so sorry if i’m incoherent #mine

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frozenartscapes · 3 years

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Post-game: In an attempt to get El to lighten up after stressing about work, Byleth suggests they sneak out to a pub in town to blow off some steam

Edelgard, a couple drinks in, sarcastic: I...I peaked, wow! What a great run. But now I get to spend the rest of my life, really chill

Byleth, still sober: Well part of that sounds...very appealing. But I took a job as a professor at Fodlan's most esteemed academy and now I assist in odd jobs at the palace... Oh goddess did I peak when I was 20?

Edelgard: There it is. Drink up.

*20 minutes later, several drinks in*

Edelgard, finishing another pint: You know what? I had my time. I didn't want to be Emperor but I was and I was like whoo! but people were like phft!

Byleth, reaching for El's hand: At least...we have each other.

Edelgard: I love you so much.

Byleth: I love you too.

Edelgard, suddenly shocked: This is real

Byleth: I know

Edelgard: You're my wife

Byleth: You're my wife

Edelgard: You married me in front of people

Byleth: I did I was there!

Edelgard: We may have peaked, but that doesn't matter! We need to do something BIG, you know? Something that will really tell people that we're going to love each other forever.

Byleth, completely determined: Yeah! What is it?

Edelgard, after thinking for a moment: I got it.

*Some time later*

Byleth, slamming her fist down on the counter of the shop they were in: We're sober

Edelgard: We want to get tattoos on our bodies 'cause we love each other

Heavily tattooed shop owner: Tattoos? This is a bait shop

Byleth and Edelgard: ...

Shop owner: But yeah, I can do that

Byleth and Edelgard: :) :)

*Some more time later*

Dorothea, guiding drunk Edelgard and Byleth out of the shop: Say goodbye to the nice man, and thank me, for stopping you from doing something that would have caused Hubert's head to explode

*The next morning*

Byleth, shuffling into Edelgard's office: El?

Edelgard, scrambling out from under her desk: I'm here! I'm here

Byleth: We have a meeting with the other Minsters about redistributing funds into new social programs

Edelgard, leaning over her desk: Oh goddess I'm so hungover. I've never been this hungover.

Byleth, who looked better after sleeping in a stream for five years: I feel fine. I ran 5k this morning

Edelgard: Really?

Byleth: No I threw up in my closet

#fe three houses #parks and rec #parks and rec continues to inspire these silly edeleth moments #i think if hubert ever knew that edelgard even considered the notion of getting a tattoo of byleth's name on her arm #people in brigid would hear his swearing #thankfully dorothea's 'edie's about to do something stupid' sense was tingling #edelgard von hresvelg #byleth #(and yeah i know that end bit is from an earlier season)#(it just fits in nicely here)

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philliamwrites · 3 years

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The Dawn Will Come [Chpt.4]

Fandom: Fire Emblem Three Houses

Pairing: Dimitri x Reader, Claude x Reader, Edelgard x Reader, Yuri x Reader, Edelgard x Byleth, lots of minor pairings

Tags: #gn reader, # platonic love byleth & reader, #reader is a tactical unit, #angst, #slow burn, #subplots, #unreliable narrator, #pining, #remporary amnesia, #reluctant herp, #canon divergence, #lost twin au, #many chapters, #original content

Words: 7.7k

Summary: Waking up in a forest without any knowledge of your past and who you are, you join the house leaders of the Officers Academy to search for a way to return your memories. Unfortunately, the church has different plans for you, and Fate places you in the centre of a cruel game with deadly stakes. It certainly doesn’t help to fall in love with a house leader who is doomed to be your demise.

Notes: Chapter 3 | Chapter 5

Chapter 04: Demands of the Faithful

I stretch lame hands of faith, and grope, And gather dust and chaff, and call To what I feel is Lord of all, And faintly trust the larger hope.

[Alfred, Lord Tennyson, In Memoriam A.H.H.]

“I’m glad you could make time,” Byleth says, carefully placing her fine cup on the small bottom plate. If she notices how uncomfortable you feel, sitting in the centre of the yard, drinking tea, she ignores it. “Let’s think together about what we want to teach during the mock battle.”

“This is a bad idea,” you say, nibbling on your cup. “A very bad idea.”

The late afternoon hours are quiet, but it certainly helps that the tea arrangement is tugged away in a far off corner in the courtyard, hidden behind tall hedges that allow privacy. The sweet smell of chamomile tea and strawberry pastry is a nice exchange from the usual savoury smells you’re used to in the cafeteria. All around you, the high, spiky roofs of the monastery’s towers stand out against the fiery, orange sky, throwing longer and longer shadows as the sun sets behind the mountains. The clouds are soft, pink cotton-candy, blushing at the warm touch of the sun.

“I think it’s a good idea,” Byleth continues, cutting through a piece of cake with her fork. “We’ve seen what the house leaders are capable of. It’s time to see what the rest of the students can do.”

“Don’t take me wrong. I think a mock battle will help them grow,” you agree. “I just don’t really understand why it’s me who has to lead the Blue Lions.”

“I think Professor Hanneman is not present at the day of the mission,” Byleth explains. “It seems on the last day of Lone Moon he always leaves the monastery for a private reason. And I assume Lady Rhea means to see the extent of your power.”

That’s what you expected as well. In the last couple of days you realised your power is a muscle, to be exercised daily, never to be pushed to the extreme. It was a strenuous task to try out how much is too much; where there’s still room. Under the keen eyes of Hanneman, you two practised day after day, trying to figure out how much your body can take before exhaustion sweeps over you and renders you immobile. Crests usually don’t have a limit; depending on their nature they grant a permament boost to the bearer’s abilities. Muttering under his breath, Hanneman had made quite a show to remind you what a curiosity the Crest of the Herald is. Like you wouldn’t know.

“Since we’re going to be on the field as well, you might want to get more practice with the sword,” Byleth proposes, and you groan. She has a way of being brutally honest, and so far no one’s been spared to get the brunt of it. “I’m not letting my students hold back. Not even against you.”

“You really are a voice of confidence, you know.” Shoulders drooping like someone took the wind from your sails, you throw your head back and drink the rest of your tea. Byleth’s expression doesn’t change, and you wonder why you even try being funny around her.

After clearing the table, Byleth accompanies you to your next lesson hall. It’s nice in theory, but her vigorous way of trying to drill sword techniques into your head on the way doesn’t hide her true agenda. Only slowly, you begin to realise that is maybe her way of caring for someone. Brutish in appearance, but once you look past the first impression of indifference, Byleth’s silent demeanour speaks louder than words.

Students linger in small groups in front of the class rooms, their exhausted faces from a full day of lessons and hard training visible in the way they carry their bodies. If you had a say in it, you’d cancel the evening lessons and let them rest; a reoccurring debate inside the faculty that doesn’t go anywhere. Byleth stops in front of the class room, surveying the students with a cool gaze, when suddenly Claude and Hilda jog towards you, and by “jogging” they decided Hilda to be the only one running while carrying Claude bridal style like he weighs nothing. As they pass you, Claude tips an invisible hat in your direction, calling “Hey, teach,” and then immediately “Bye, teach!” as they cross the courtyard.

Your gaze follows them. “What just happened.”

Byleth doesn’t even bother to look. “Claude and Hilda happened.”

Heavens, you don’t know if you’re able to handle them later.

After exchanging goodbyes with Byleth, you tackle the next forty minutes with a belly full of sweets and a mind occupied with worrying about everything you might do wrong next week. Forming two groups, you hand out two different manoeuvres you dug out of books, and present the task, “Work out the pros and cons of each battle tactic, and present them to the class. Explain where you would have done things differently, and why.”

Sylvain raises his hand.

“Yes, you can leave to bathroom breaks without asking me,” you say.

Sylvain drops his hand. Then raises it again.

“No, you can’t bring animals you find on your way back to your seat,” you say.

He drops his hand. Beside him, Ingrid fails to stifle a groan.

Twenty minutes later, the first group stands in front of the class. Mercedes’s steady hand draws the perfect copy of the manoeuvre on the chalk board while Annette recites every step flawlessly. They’re a powerful combination, and that’s only half owed to their friendship. Mercedes is soft; she’s the silk hiding the dagger that Annette’s sharp mind is. There’s strength in kindness, and both have honed this ability to a razor-sharp weapon. There’s still a pouch of unfinished cookies Mercedes has baked for you left in your room, something to keep in mind for the next tea hour with Byleth. Felix and Dedue don’t add much, and you’re a little afraid to ask, seeing how Felix’s eyes burn holes in the back of Dedue’s head. There’s been rumours going on about a dispute, but no details, and you gladly leave that sort of teacher-student business to Hanneman.

The remaining students do their job almost just as good. But the thought of children being so confident in ways of war and killing leaves a painful twinge in your chest. You wonder what will become of them all in a few years, what battles they will win. What battles they will lose—this fear lingers at the edges of your consciousness like an ever-present shadow. To push it away, you try to refocus on the task at hand.

“Look at the battalions you have,” you advise, tapping a finger against the cool surface of the board. It comes away white with chalk, leaving a white smudge on your robe as you wipe it off. “Where are they placed?”

Ashe clears his throat. “Two Lance Soldiers, that’s Infantry. One Magic Squadron, also Infantry. The latter is stationed far northeast on that island. Two Pegasus Corpses, which are Flying Types. We put them behind the mountains to ambush the enemies on their way to one of our Infantries.”

“A good idea in theory,” you acknowledge, and don’t miss how Ashe exhales in relief. “And where are you enemies?”

“They’re facing our Infantry and the Squadron,” Dimitri steps in now. “The Flying Unit engage from the back. After their victory, Infantry and Flying close the last opposite unite off on the bridge, and join the Magic Squadron in fighting.”

“Okay, okay,” you nod. “And now look at the terrain of this last unit you want to take on from the front and back. The one on the bridge moving towards the Squadron.”

The room is quiet for a minute, and then a silent “Oh” from Ashe.

“Yes. Oh. The Magic Squadron moves slower through the woods. You’ll lose them. And one of the Lance units is probably the next to go.” You draw sharp lines across the board with red chalk, changing the battalion’s movements. One goes across the whole board, crossing out the word Sea. “Wouldn’t it be smarter to have your Pegasus Companies move this way across the water, join the Magic Squadron and then close in from the right to join the Infantries?”

“But Herald.” Ingrid raises her hand, but doesn’t wait for you to pick her. “If Infantry and Flying take out the first enemy, we’ll still win. The remaining unit will be trapped on the island without a possibility to retreat. Wouldn’t it be wiser to sacrifice the Magic Squadron just for that?”

“I agree with Ingrid,” says Sylvain. He’s sitting on a desk, and swings his legs back and forth. “With or without them, we won the battle, and that’s what matters.”

You turn back to scan the manoeuvre one more time. They’re right—blocking the enemy’s escape routes off proves a solid guarantee to win, and yet you’ve somewhat hoped they wouldn’t settle on this option. There’s a bitter taste in your mouth, turning your lips upside down as if you’ve bitten into a lemon.

“Sometimes, you don’t want to win the battle,” you start slowly, the thought blossoming from a dark place deep inside you. “Sometimes you want as many as possible to live.” Which is easier said than done, and no one in the room agrees on your statement because they know just as much that such a choice isn’t always granted. Before the silence stretches on too long, you quickly add, “I guess it is more important to know there is no right or wrong answer. You make decisions later on that will either grant you victory or death, and you will have to live with those decisions.”

Unanimous murmur sounds from the students, a topic nobody wants to dwell on too long, and you grant them that wish; this precious little time they’re still allowed to be children and make mistakes before responsibilities catch up to them. The rest of the lesson flies past without disturbances, and when the bells announce the break, they jump from their seats and scurry outside.

“Don’t forget there’s going to be a test after the mock battle,” you call after them, knowing they’ll forget anyway and then boycott. The Lions are finally done with lessons, but there is the Deer House who have the misfortune to attend the last period of the day. As you prepare their unit of instruction on different terrains, Dimitri approaches you, his expression a mixture between confidence and tension.

“Herald.” He stops in front of your desk, shoulders squared into a declaration of deference. “I have prepared instructions on everyone’s weaknesses and strengths. Please, do consider to take a look. Since one of the rules is that only six units will be stationed on the field, I hope this will make your decision easier who to choose.” Placing the papers with outmost care on your table, Dimitri hesitates a moment before continuing, “What you said earlier … truth be told, I think the same. To limit the loss of lives as much as possible should be a priority to a leader as well. To hear that from someone like you … I was quite glad.”

“Someone like me,” you repeat, but you’re more surprised to feel your fingers itch to take the papers and get a first read on everyone. After going through similar notes from Linhardt, you’re now excited to learn more about your proteges, and with luck someone from the Golden Deer students might provide you with a first survey as well.

“Someone responsible for tactics and strategy,” Dimitri quickly clarifies. “Someone tasked with bringing absolute victory.” He gives you a look that is somehow both caressing and calculating at the same time. “I understand that those sometimes compete with one’s own beliefs regarding the value of life. One’s conscience is as much of a weapon as a sharpened blade. If it breaks, what use is there to a person.”

“Those are … some mature thoughts.” You don’t know where this observation goes. Of course he is mature, he has to be as the successor of a noble lineage. “For someone your age.” You press your mouth into a thin line, cursing your inability to think of a better response. But Dimitri simply smiles—a smile that is like a light suddenly being turned on in every room of a dark house.

“Oh, but I do not want to bore you with such matters. I just wanted to add, I really do look forward to have you on our side during the mock battle.” He gives a little courtesy bow. “Let us discuss the details on the day before the mission. A good evening to you, Herald.”

Dimitri leaves with a little bounce to his step. It’s probably better he’s in high spirits, even though you aren’t sure what exactly made him happy. It would be a real shame to extinguish his excitement by being an utter failure during the battle, so you make sure to read whatever he managed to put together about his classmates as soon as possible. There’s still some minutes left before the first Deer students will enter. Exhaustion lulls you into resting your eyes, and the moment your head is cradled in your arms, you doze off.

It’s the third time you have this dream after joining the Officer’s Academy, though calling it a ‘dream’ is a stretch—there is nothing happening, nothing to see. Only white, as pure and unblemished as a young lily blossom in early spring. Only this time this picture—maybe a memory, but of what or where you can’t say—is different.

Wake up, a voice whispers, barely recognisable and dull, spoken behind a wall of water. Wake up.

Your hands weigh a ton. Unable to reach out and grasp it, the dream blurs, slipping through your fingers like sand.

Wake up.

“Herald, wake up,” Claude persists. “You’re drooling on my test papers.”

His hand brushes your shoulder and you jump, all focus on the dream dispersing. Multiple voices fill the room in a shower of sounds, not helping to regain your senses of where you are. It doesn’t help that your right eye throbs dully, and as you rub it to somehow reduce the sensation, white spots dance across your vision.

“So sorry, Herald,” Claude smirks with his hand still hovering over your shoulder. “Didn’t mean to wake you from your beauty rest, but Hilda planned to draw obscene things on your face, and we can’t have that now, can we.”

“Liars never prosper, Claude!” comes Hilda’s response from somewhere in the back of the room. You groan, narrowing your eyes at him. Going back to sleep and stumbling about to try and figure out what’s going on sounds more pleasing than dealing with Claude’s shenanigans.

“Man, what a bummer you won’t join our House during the mock battle,” he continues as if Hilda hasn’t said anything. “If someone asked me, I think to have you fight for the Blue Lions is cheating.”

“But no one asked you?” you offer, indulging him with a weak smile.

“The audacity, right?” Claude rolls his eyes towards the ceiling, leaning against the teacher’s desk. “Just imagine the brilliant schemes we two could work out. Oh, I have an amazing idea. How about you ask Lady Rhea—”

“I’m not asking to be by your side during the battle.”

“Ouch.” Claude places a hand over his chest, right above his heart. “Immediately shut down. Who knew our dearest Herald would be such a heart breaker.”

You shoo him away, not only because he’s getting on your nerves, but there’s also Ignatz and Raphael standing in line, waiting for your attention.

“We’ve heard the students from the other Houses gave you some insight in their abilities,” Ignatz says, tugging a stack of papers to his chest. “We decided to give you one as well.”

“I’m sure you’ll like them,” Raphael chimes in, looking more excited than usual. “I gave Ignatz instructions on how to make our report the best. Forget boring words, Herald, we’ve prepared the real deal!” He rips the papers from Ignatz’s hands and slams them on your table. A crack sounds on the underside, and Raphael leans his whole weight upon the surface, completely oblivious to the protesting creak of the wood.

“Here, we started with Claude, since he’s the big shot and all that,” he explains, opening the first page. It shows Claude, a surprisingly accurate portrait of him, if not a little bit scrawny. He’s wielding a bow, nocking multiple arrows. Seems like Raphael wasn’t the only one giving instructions.

“And here is Leonie, and there’s Lorenz, and oh! That’s us working together as a team!” Raphael beams as he turns the page. In this picture, everyone is assembled, fighting against angry looking soldiers and horned monsters. There’s Lysithea and Marianne shooting lightning bolts from their hands, zapping their opponents. Raphael is carrying a huge stone, on top of it stands Hilda, wielding a mighty axe.

“These are the most accurate file reports I’ve seen,” you say for lack of better words. “It really is a shame I can’t join you for the mock battle.”

“There’s gonna be a next time, no worries!” Raphael gives you a thumbs up, then retreats to his seat, Ignatz by his side. They’re a funny duo, not just because of their different build. Their personalities seem the complete opposite, and yet strangely fit like a child’s box to sort blocks into the right shapes.

The difference between the Golden Deers and Blue Lions, for one, is the noise level. Instead of waiting for you to call them up one by one, they love to shout answers whenever they see fit. Judging who was the first isn’t really easy when four people scream at the same time, so you’ve given up on that—Claude’s policy whoever screams loudest didn’t help all too much as well. Maybe it’s time to ask Byleth about some tips how to handle them. When the bell tolls for the last time for this day, announcing everyone to be relieved of their work, the student clear out faster than during fire drills, leaving you with a turmoil of thoughts and worries and two little voices bickering about how much of a disaster next week is going to be.

After seven days and nights of restless sleep and vigorous training under the vicious supervision of Byleth, the green fields stretching before you end boarding on lush woods, its treetops protruding into the sky. It’s a wonderful day you would enjoy much more without knowing this is a battle field, and the people behind you wait for your command.

“Black Eagle and Golden Deer are in position. Captain Jeralt said the mock battle begins in roughly ten minutes.” Dedue gives you an expectant look, and you give him a curt nod, your mouth dry.

“Thanks. We’ll have a last briefing. After that, we’ll deploy our units.”

Dedue joins his classmates, leaving you to your troubled thoughts. With luck, none of your opponents will reach you, and you won’t have to fight. It’s as if you can feel Byleth’s taste for your blood all across the field, even though right now she’s just a blurry, dark blob in the distance, surrounded by her students.

“Do not worry, Herald.” The hard metal of a gauntlet on your shoulder makes you flinch, backing away from Dimitri. The worry on his face is a mirror of your own, albeit for different reasons. “Everyone will do their best to follow your orders, and fight with everything they've got. Your leadership will lead us to victory.”

“Oh, yeah!” You don’t meet his eyes. “For sure.” Zero pressure and all that. You don’t say that, seeing that most of the students don’t appear to be as nervous as you. Confidence is key, and even though you see none of it in tangible proximity, you can at least fake it until you make it.

Six minutes left. With a deep breath, you try to get hold of yourself, and face the Lions.

“Since we don’t know who will be deployed by Manuela and Byleth, prepare for everything. I want to split the group. Dimitri, Dedue and Mercedes move to the northern forest. Felix, Sylvain, you’re moving west with me.”

Felix pulls a grimace, but before he can say anything, Sylvain throws an arm around his shoulders and leans on him, gracing you with a full grin. “We got your back, Herald.” He earns a whack on his back from his friend.

“Why are we splitting up if our plan is to take out each group separately?” Dedue inquirers. “Isn’t that what we agreed on before?”

“I think the Herald plans to let our opponents think we plan on taking them both on at the same time.” Dimitri throws a quick glance at you. “We’ll draw them in our direction, and once they are near, we close in from both sides.”

You nod. “Precisely. We know the Black Eagles will start far north from us. The Golden Deers are northwest. As soon as one of them moves towards us, we’ll have to defeat them immediately. It will be easier fighting one House, not both at the same time.”

“Look at you, Your Highness.” Sylvain pats him on the shoulder, looking proud. “Someone’s been paying attention in class!”

“Sylvain—” Dimitri’s chiding meets deaf ears as Sylvain already turns away, checking his lance for a last time. But he does beam a little, you think. Or maybe it’s just the sun making everything look much brighter. It’ll go into your report nonetheless. Chances of a victory look good—even if you have to retreat, the Blue Lions might make it on their own.

The bressy sound of a horn echoes across the valley, reverberating in your bones. The mock battle begins.

The weight of the wooden training sword hanging from your hip is foreign; it’s as though you only expect to trip over it. Determined to keep it in its holster, you approach the grove, flanked by Sylvain and Felix—and not a minute too soon. Moving towards you is the first line of enemies, Ignatz, Lorenz and Marianne.

“I think they didn’t see us—” Sylvain starts just as the first arrow flies past his head and hits the trunk beside him with a thunk. For safety purposes, all arrow’s tips are wrapped up in stiff cloth, not intended to leave permanent wounds but surely still capable to deliver nasty bruises like the training swords and lances.

“I think they saw us—” Sylvain’s brilliant new observation ends in a yelp as Felix shoves him out of the line of fire.

“Get down, dumbass!”

You three duck behind bushes and trees, cautiously observing how the others advance, their weapons drawn.

“I’ll go for Ignatz,” you say. “Felix, you’re fast enough to reach Marianne and take her down before she starts healing everyone.”

“Fine, we’ll try your plan.” Felix has his sword drawn already, gripping it tight enough his knuckles turn white. “Try not to get kicked out too soon, will you.”

You blow a strand of hair from out of your eyes, squinting at his back as he jumps out of cover. The last couple of weeks you’ve put in some extra hours of sword practice with Felix. As an exceptional swordsman, noble and diligent in his training unlike anyone else—safe maybe for Dimitri—you imagined no one could teach you as much as possible in the short amount of time until the mission. It took some convincing, but the decisive argument that sold him was your desire to become better to finally have at least a chance against Byleth. If she is stern during practice, Felix is vicious, exploiting the tiniest opening you give in order to make you learn from your mistakes. Your body was a medley of pain and aches after every evening, but now the memory of that very same melody is your marching song towards battle. Then there’s always the knowledge that if you three can distract them long enough before the rest of the Golden Deer students arrive, Dimitri and the rest will close in on your position, and taking down your opponents won’t be difficult.

“Sylvain, Lorenz is yours.”

He answers with a simple salute, grip tight around his training lance, and as you both follow Felix out in the open, an image flickers before you, there and gone like a flame going out with a last glint. An arrow, headed straight at you. Your body moves in instinct, dodging the projectile not a second too late. Judging from the direction of its origin, Ignatz must be just beyond the rocks only a few hundred yards away. You throw a MiasmaΔ in his direction, the black ball carving its path across the grasslands. It hits the stone, chipping parts away and revealing Ignatz, crouching behind it. He looks up, dirt on his cheeks, and adjusts his glasses before ducking out of his cover, another arrow already ready on his bow.

Another arrow hits him on his back, hard enough to get him down on his knees. Mercedes’ accuracy isn’t as good as Ashe’s, but the determination carved into her face makes up for lack of skill. Dimitri and Dedue are right on her heels, but a single look thrown over your shoulder shows that Felix and Sylvain have everything under control. Coming out victorious as well, save for Sylvain pressing a hand against his ribs, they were still complete. The knowledge of that makes you sigh in relief, a new surge of hope soaring inside you.

“I knew we shouldn’t have listened to Claude’s dubious plan.” Lorenz’s bickering is still audible, even as the three proceed to leave the battle grounds to meet up with Jeralt. You’re really curious to see what exactly Claude had in mind, but diverting your focus for just a second could become dangerous. Instead, you turn towards the students.

“Stay close,” you order, waiting until Mercedes is finished checking Sylvain's injuries. “We’re going to move further towards the Golden Deers and eliminate them first.” Flexing your fingers against the slow growth of getting used casting spells, your group begins to move further north.

Out of the corner of your eyes, you notice Dimitri buckling and unbuckling his spear from his back. Out of lack for the right words, and because the first rush of adrenaline still courses through your body, you jostle against him, wearing a grin on your face.

“Look lively, Your Highness,” you advise. “All that nervous fumbling isn’t what a leader is supposed to do.”

A tiny gasps leaves him, more an exhale than anything else, but he turns towards you, slightly flushed. Bringing his hands to his sides, it’s too obvious he’s tensing his body so they don’t stray again—like a statue that’s on the edge of shattering at the tiniest movement.

“You’re right, of course.” He lowers his head a little. “I just keep thinking that the Black Eagle students wait for us in that direction as well. Some are surely moving towards us as we speak.”

“Are you worried about Byleth?” you wonder, and more as an afterthought add, “Or Edelgard?”

“Anyone who is not worried about Byleth is a fool, if you ask me,” he replies with a crease between his pale eyebrows. “And well, this is our first chance to prove ourselves, being the heirs to the ruling factions. I know Edelgard is exceptionally strong. And Claude surely has an ace up his sleeve. You are right, Herald. Nervousness is a sign of hesitation, of weakness. I will be better than that.” A new fire comes alive in his eyes as he strides onward, catching up to Mercedes and Sylvain to compliment her on the excellent shot from before.

The epiphany really comes only now, fast and hard like a lightning bolt, that these children will drink in everything you have to offer—advices, orders, simple words of encouragement—simply for the title that is strapped around your neck. The weight of that responsibility slows your steps, which allows for another worry to quickly catch up: has everything you have taught them so far been right? Do they really know how to exploit the advantages certain classes have over others; will a strategic retreat even occur to them in the right time before it’s too late.

Doubt is like poison, slowly eating you from the inside. This mock battle won’t just be a lesson for the students. It will also test if you have put them on the right path, and the realisation unfolds a new conviction inside you, breathing new wind into your sails.

You quickly catch up to them, another rush of encouraging words on your lips when another image flickers on and off, painting your sight red. You freeze, raising an arm, hand formed into a fist.

“Halt!” you shout, processing what you just saw. The students pause, forming a loose circle around you. The throbbing from before settles back in, more persistent now like someone’s knocking against the back of your skull to get your attention. You try to ignore that and focus on categorising every student’s ability in alphabetical order.

“Linhardt,” you gasp, eyes wide open and glued on Dedue.

The students exchange worried glances. Sylvain is the first to speak. “No, Herald,” he says. “Linhardt’s the pretty boy with all the books, you know. Who sleeps just about anywhere, like a cat. That’s our Dedue here.”

“No, I mean Linhardt has Nosferatu,” you quickly explain, flailing your hands in hope to express yourself better. It doesn’t look like it helps. “Linhardt is the only one left who can use Nosferatu, and he’s going to land a good hit on Dedue. And with good, I mean bad. If he hits you, you’re down, Dedue.” Because only that makes sense, as Marianne is already standing on the sidelines and you haven’t heard about anyone else learning the skill. Undoubtedly a Nosferatu will hit Dedue if you don’t change course or take the spell caster out first.

Dedue steps forward. “Should it give us an advantage against our enemy, I will gladly face the opponent and go down if it means it won’t interfere with our progress towards the Golden Deer students.”

“Sacrificing yourself for a mere praise from the boar, is that what you hope for?” Felix demands, or more like snarls, his handsome face crumpling into an ugly look of contempt. “Pathetic.”

“Sacrifice is a big word to throw around during a mock battle, don’t you think,” Sylvain unhelpfully throws in, his posture a little too relaxed in the light of the conflict that’s about to break out.

Dedue shakes his head. “I am simply fulfilling my duty,” he states. “Anything that will bring His Highness victory.”

“You would also run head first into an ambush and get yourself killed, is that it?” Felix grimaces. “Blindly following orders—”

“Okay, okay, that’s enough!” Your raised voice makes them pause, and you use that second to grab lead of the conversation. “We don’t even know if Linhardt is going to be alone or joined by other Eagle students. What do you think will your little act accomplish, Dedue?”

He sets his mouth into a grim, hard line, unable to come up with a satisfying answer that isn’t a repeat of what he just said.

“You’ll have a tough time going against Black Eagles with all their magic users, so stay with Dimitri. Go and deal with the rest of the Golden Deer students. And you—” You meet Felix’s glare with narrowed eyes. “A battlefield isn’t the place to throw around petty disagreements. You would do well to remember that.”

“Understood.” He rips the training sword from its holster. “But let me go take down that mage. I’ll cut him down swiftly.”

“We’ll go together. I’m not leaving any of you on your own. Take care of Claude,” you tell Dimitri, showing with a nod that you fully trust in his leading ability. “We’ll meet east from the barricades in exactly one hour.”

He doesn’t shy away from you glare. “Understood. Take care you two.”

Felix takes the lead with long, eager strides. As you follow him, you rub your eye, wincing at the pinprick-like pain. The dull throb doesn’t cease this time, and if you had to take a guess, there’s only once left for the Crest to activate before you reach your limit. So far, nothing has helped you to ascertain when exactly a foresight occurs, and leaving it to pure chance is like grasping a loose rope in hopes that it is tied to something somewhere as you take the leap. Maybe Hanneman will make more sense of it laters.

“You should have stayed with the others,” Felix says after a moment, scanning your surroundings for any sign of the enemy. It sounds more like a simple statement than an accusation. “I can handle someone like Linhardt on my own.”

“I said before, we don’t know if he’s alone. I highly doubt it.” It’s like Dimitri said before: Underestimating Byleth will surely end in casualties and defeat. You don’t consider it far-fetched that she has sent a non-magic class with Linhardt, but who that will be is left to be determined.

“No matter how many accompany him. Be it two or three or all of them, I will take them down.”

“It takes more than one person to win a war.” Though you don’t doubt Felix might try it by himself anyway. “You’ll notice soon enough that you will rely on your comrades.”

“I will rely on them as long as they don’t get in my way.”

“So charming,” you mumble to yourself as you two round a mound. It really is none of your business, but you're actually curious about what is going on between him and Dedue. The moment you finish outweighing the pros and cons of trying to go down that rabbit hole, the air around you changes, barely noticeable save for a change of wind—it completely stills for a second, but that is enough to realise what’s happening.

“Felix—” you manage before the Nosferatu explodes in front of you, knocking you to the ground. Before the mock battle, all magicians were instructed to weaken their spells; no lasting damage should befall any of the participants. Only because of that you manage to climb back on your feet, only left with dizziness that makes the world spin. The jarring sound of metal clashing against metal clears your mind a little, and when you turn around, Felix and Ferdinand are clashing blades.

You turn further, and there he is, a hand raised in your direction. “Sorry, Herald,” Linhardt says. He doesn’t sound sorry at all. “The professor threatened with extra homework if we would hold back against you.”

“Of course she did,” you mumble, grabbing your sword with sweaty hands. Two against two is fair, and you have no doubt that Felix will hold his ground against Ferdinand. The only solution to your little problem named Linhardt is to get as close as possible, and make use of your advantage in meagre sword skills.

Another Nosferatu is sent your way, but this time you dodge, the hair on your neck standing on end. Somehow your body automatically shies away from Faith magic like a cat fleeing from water. Just one more hit will surely be enough to throw you out of the mock battle, and you can’t have that, not when the picture of Dimitri’s resolute expression is carved into your mind.

You close the distance, all nerves tensed in anticipation, completely focused on trying to feel where the next spell is going to land. As Linhardt retreats into the woods, his sight obscured by trees, you dive after him, shoving twigs out of your way. A shadow moves through the undergrowth; every muscle in your body locks up, but you plunge forward, sword raised—

Linhardt gasps when he finds himself pressed against a tree, your sword at his throat. With both hands up, he doesn’t move an inch, simply blinking at you. Somewhere above you, a bird cries out; a branch breaks. Linhardt makes a face like he jammed his foot in a door he slammed shut himself.

“I surrender,” he says. “Getting beat up and spending time in the infirmary doesn’t sound as good as reading tomes in the library.”

“You sure?” Your heart beats so loud in your chest, it’s a miracle it doesn’t break through your ribcage and fly off. “Byleth might drown you in homework for that.”

He shrugs. “I call it a strategic retreat. I’ll just have to—” A yawn. “—convince the professor.” Another yawn. You begin to see the ulterior motive behind his surrender. Squinting at him, you proceed to bind his hands with a dark spell. Black shackles appear around his wrists, locking them tight together. As you make your way out of the grove, you hope Felix had the same success.

That thought immediately dies when you return to the plain and see Jeralt heaving an unconscious Felix on the back of his horse, a battered Ferdinand by his side.

“Ah, Herald.” Even though beaten up black and blue, Ferdinand still manages a smile. It looks a little lopsided with his swollen cheek and the dried blood on his upper lip. “I don’t mean to offend, but I hope you return because Linhardt defeated you in mighty combat?” A second too late he sees the magic binds around Linhardt’s wrists. His face falls. “My, Linhardt.”

“You don’t quite look so good yourself,” Linhardt throws back without any heat in his voice. He sounds rather bored. Tired.

“Excuse me, but what happened. What’s wrong with Felix?” you ask, turning to Jeralt. Before he can answer, Ferdinand chimes in, “He fought splendidly! Though I had no doubt in that, he is a noble after all. Yet, after ringing me to the ground, he lost consciousness. By my honour as the heir of House Aegir, I cannot take advantage of that. We both shall step out of battle.”

“He passed out?” Now that you take a good look at him, he’s still pale, unhealthily so. Slick sweat glues his dark hair to his forehead, and the skin beneath his eyes shimmers slightly blue—lack of sleep.

“Overexertion, I guess,” Jeralt says now. He pulls Linhardt to his side, and gives his shackles a thoughtful look. “I’ll take these three with me. You go and continue the mock battle, Herald.”

“But…” It doesn’t feel right to leave Felix alone. Even though he technically isn’t, you imagine it would be better to wake up to a friendly face.

“He’ll be fine.” Jeralt gives you a strange sideway glance. “The other brats rely on you right now, don’t they? Go to them.”

He’s right, of course. The mission isn’t over yet, and with a strong combatant like Felix missing, victory has just slipped from your grasp.

There is the meeting point. There it is, and no student from the Lion House is in sight. The minutes pass in long stretches, ticking away until it’s impossible to tell if time moves on or holds still. Holding out between the trees, you look in both directions—for your comrades and the enemy. For whatever reason, Byleth has decided not to advance to your position, and you aren’t sure what that’s supposed to mean. More minutes pass in aggravating silence, heavy and oppressing, and then—

“Herald!” Dimitri’s voice rings through the woods. Your head snaps to him, and there they are, the Blue Lions tearing through the woods, a yellow flag with a deer on it waving behind them.

“You did it!” Joy and relief spreads through you as you stumble towards them. “You guys really did it!” They shuffle around you like kittens searching for warmth, and something tight uncoils inside your chest. Is this what Byleth always feels when she’s in front of her class?

“Hilda and Claude were mighty opponents, but nothing we couldn’t handle,” Dimitri reassures, but then a shadow jumps over his features. “Unfortunately, Mercedes had to leave. We couldn’t reach her in time to step in.”

“Step in,” Sylvain repeats, muttered under his breath as he brushes red locks from his sweaty forehead. “I want to see you stepping in when Hilda swings that axe like a lunatic and not scream like a little girl.”

“Where is Felix?” Dedue inquirers, ignoring Sylvain.

Your shoulders drop. “Well, Linhardt was accompanied by Ferdinand, and while I pursued Linhardt, they fought. None of them emerged unscathed, although I feel Felix drew the shorter straw.”

“Felix?” Dimitri repeats. He sounds as if you just tried to convince him it’s going to rain butterscotch pie later. “Our Felix lost?”

“Not exactly the fight, but I’m sure his pride took a hard beating.”

“Well, that leaves four against four.” Dimitri brings a hand up to his chin, a worry crease between his eyebrows. “And they still have Edelgard and the Professor.”

“And we got the Herald and you!” Sylvain beams. “I say we wrap this up and celebrate our victory with a nice dinner and maybe some ale? How does that sound?”

“Sacrilegious.” Your voice is drier than the crisp leaves cracking under your feet. “Aren’t you too young for alcohol?”

“Too young and irresponsible,” Dimitri agrees with you, looking tired of Sylvain’s antics. “But I don’t object to a celebratory dinner.”

“That is, if we win.” Dedue reads your mind, and brings the conversation back on the right course.

“I assume the Black Eagles are holding position. They’re waiting for us,” you say, briefly checking everyone’s state. Safe for dirt and scratches, they’re still doing good, though having fought already, the Blue Lions are on a slight disadvantage. You can only hope some of Byleth’s students dropped out facing the Golden Deers.

“We shouldn’t keep them waiting then.” Sylvain winks, playing with the grip of his lance. The smile that flirts with his lips is threatening.

“Keep your guard up.” Dimitri shares a single, meaningful glance with every one of you, then leads your little group out of the forest. Whatever Byleth has planned, you hope that you’ll be ready for it.

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randoimago · 3 years

Text

Something to Report :: Gatekeeper

Pairing: Gatekeeper x Byleth/Reader

Rating: Angst

Warning: Unrequited Feelings

Words: 940

Support Me (if you want): https://ko-fi.com/jinxitty

AN:

Onesided Gatekeeper and Byleth. Just cause I love Gatekeeper (who doesn’t in the fandom) and I wanted some angst.

And while I wrote it as Byleth, you can just imagine it as Reader-Insert instead should you like

As usual, Gatekeeper stood at his post, watching the merchants talk to various civilians and students that passed by looking to find an interesting item or have something repaired. Most just passed him with a smile and nod, not really saying anything. But Gatekeeper kept a smile on his face as was his job to make everyone feel welcomed. Well, his job was to keep watch for suspicious people and stop them from entering, but making others feel welcomed seemed like a good add on.

Gatekeeper was getting a bit bored as he let his mind drift to various things before snapping back to attention. The last thing he needed is to let someone suspicious walk by and cause someone to be in danger. There is no way he can allow something like that to happen! So he went back to keeping watch and being bored.

That boredom soon left him as he caught someone walk out of the monastery. He glanced and his eyes widened beneath his helmet as he spotted the professor. He felt his mouth go dry as he stood at attention even more. He immediately went to push his helmet down further to hide the blush that spread.

While he has had nice conversations with others in his job, ever since the professor had been hired, they always talked to him. Every single time they came back from a mission, they'd talk to the gatekeeper and he'd listen to the stories as well as share his own of what had happened. The two would laugh together and smile. So of course Gatekeeper couldn't help but develop feelings from all of these consistent conversations.

Honestly, Gatekeeper didn't even know when the attraction began. He just realized while listening to the professor tell a story that they looked ethereal in the light of the sun as they seemed so happy with retelling the tale. The Gatekeeper immediately realized that he had it bad, but there's no way he could tell them.

He's supposed to stand in this spot and keep watch. His job is to stop suspicious people from coming in. The professor is a very trusted member of the monastery, tasked with teaching the students. There's no way someone as important as them would want to be with someone as boring as a Gatekeeper.

"Are you okay?" Gatekeeper was snapped out of his thoughts as he noticed that the professor must have been trying to talk to him. He quickly cleared his throat as he stood up as straight as he could, feeling himself sweat more under his armor than he had been in the sun and heat.

"Nothing to report, professor!" There was a crack in his voice as he said this, causing him to mentally curse at himself. "Today has been pretty dull with not a whole lot of business going on. Hopefully it picks up as the day goes on!" Hopefully that was enough to keep the professor from prying into the tense state of the Gatekeeper as well as the red face.

"Ah, hoping for some action then?" The Gatekeeper swallowed the lump in his throat as his mind went somewhere else at that statement. He quickly did his best to force a laugh.

"Hopefully nothing too exciting. We get that on a monthly basis!" It is true that something always seems to happen as the months come to a close. It's a good thing that the Gatekeeper doesn't have a weak heart otherwise he'd have passed out countless times from the amount of creatures he has witnessed since the professor joined the monastery. Not that it's their fault of course!

"You can say that again."

"Hopefully nothing too exciting. We get that on a monthly basis!"

"..."

The Gatekeeper felt his whole being pale at that as he mentally cursed himself again and again for being such an idiot. This is another reason why the professor has no interest in him. He's an idiot and wishes for the goddess to just smite him already.

"Snrk-" The Gatekeeper wore a look of surprise as he saw the professor cover their mouth as a snicker left. He felt himself blush even more at the fact.

"Um," What was he even supposed to say?

"N- No, sorry! I- I'm not--" More snickers and laughs "--not laughing at you! You just seemed so- so matter-of-fact when you repeated. It was adorable."

The gatekeeper felt himself redden more. The professor thinks he's adorable? There was a tug on his heart before he felt it start to hurt a bit. Of course the professor didn't mean it in a romantic way. Just a statement. He's just a boring Gatekeeper.

"Uh, I'm glad that I made you smile today professor!" The professor smiled more at that as Gatekeeper felt himself feel happier and his heart feel lighter that he is the reason for the professor's happiness.

"You always make me smile, Gatekeeper." He did his best to move his helmet discreetly to hide his blush. "As much as I'd like to continue our conversation, I have to see if one of the merchants have an item that one of my student's really loves. Until next time!" The professor threw a wave over their shoulder as they walked down the steps, the Gatekeeper watching them the whole time.

If he was braver, he'd confess how he felt. He'd tell them that he's deeply in love with their beauty and strength. He'd tell them how they made him feel on a daily basis, how they brought so much joy to his boring job.

But he's not brave, he's just a boring Gatekeeper.

#fe3h #fe3h x reader #fire emblem x reader #fire emblem gatekeeper #fire emblem gatekeeper x reader #gatekeeper x reader #fe3h gatekeeper x reader

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beyondthetower · 3 years

Text

Poppies in the Graveyard (Byleth x Felix)

Summary: In an attempt to make sense of what has happened in the past five years, Byleth finds herself at her parents grave.

Characters/Pairing: Byleth x Felix

Word Count: 1.7K

Warnings: Lil bit o’ angst

A/N: I’m marrying Felix in my VW play-through and I didn’t think I would have that many feelings for him but man did I fall hard for this brooding boy.

It rained all weekend. Rainy days had a way of squirming their way into Byleth’s heart and hardening it. It reminded her of her father’s death. Reminding her that soon as he had passed, had smiled at her one last time, the heavens opened up. Symbolic: that’s what people called it. People that didn’t know the truth of who she was. It was like the Goddess wept with you, Mercedes had said a few days after it happened. Byleth wanted to correct her, to tell her that the Goddess wept whenever she wept because they were one in the same. But it didn’t matter much to her who understood and who didn’t.

That had been so many years ago that Byleth wondered if people even remembered her father’s death or if it had become just another nameless sacrifice in the sake of somebody’s “greater good”. It broke her heart to think that it was a possibility.

Now, on rainy days, Byleth would move without thinking. She would wake up, eat, grab some flowers from the greenhouse, and make her way to the cemetery.

Before her father told her the story of her mother, she would often find him standing by her gravestone. One day she had been walking back from training with Dimitri and noticed him hovering over the site with flowers. She had brushed it off at first. Surely he had known plenty of knights that were buried there. But the flowers made her wonder. And the frequency of his visits did too. She probably should have realized before he told her.

“Hi father. Hi mother.”

Byleth placed the flowers by the weathered stone. She sat down in the wet grass, ignoring the cold. Pulling her knees up to her chest, she smiled at the site of her father’s name resting beside her mothers. While she had never known much about her mother, Byleth could still feel the love he had for her. The few times he would mention her, the love on his face was rivaled only by the look he’d give her after she’d done particularly well in battle: a heart-swelling pride. It made her feel a connection she never realized she needed. She often told them that. On these visits, since the rain kept most people inside, Byleth often found herself talking to both of them.

“Whenever I was in a bad mood, father would always bring me whatever flowers he could find where we had set up camp that day.” Byleth smiled at the memory. “I always thought it was so out of character, as much as I loved them. But I see now that isn’t the case.”

She shuffled her feet into the dirt and watched the rain pool into the divots her heels made.

“The poppies were my favorites. I don’t know if I ever told you that, but they were. You must have known because you’d bring them often. Although, don’t think I didn’t notice you would bring them here, father. Does that mean they were my mother's favorite too?”

There was a low rumble of thunder in the distance. She hadn’t realized a storm was coming. It was still far off, and she hoped it wouldn’t blow away her flowers. It made her wonder about what Mercedes had said. Did the heavens open for her? Did storms manifest when she felt them start to stir within herself? Did she subconsciously make the rain when she needed an excuse to see them the most?

“Professor?”

Byleth was surprised to see Felix standing over her, his figure a silhouette in the dim light of the flickering oil lamps. His thick, fur coat hung loosely on his shoulders, like he was only wearing it because someone told him he had to. “Felix,” she said quickly, with a wrinkle in her brow.

He scoffed. “Don’t sound so surprised,” he said. “I might have hated the guy but he was still my father.” He nodded toward the freshly planted stone beside her.

Byleth had forgotten that Rodrigue was buried there. He had only been gone a few weeks, and Ingrid had tried so desperately to figure out a way to get him back home for a proper burial that Byleth assumed that she had had happened. But on the grave beside her parents, Duke Rodrigue Achille Fraldarius was etched in large letters. She felt guilty for not bringing him anything.

“Is that Captain Jeralt’s grave?” Felix asked, squatting down beside her.

She nodded.

“Is there another name there?” Felix squinted at the fading text.

“My mother.” Byleth felt a warmth in her chest at the mention of her. She liked the sound of it. She wasn’t much for sentimentality, and she had never known her to begin with, but the past few months had made her softer. She wanted to know more about her past, and to pass that on to others.

She had a mother.

“I didn’t realize your mother was buried here,” he admitted. “In fact. I’ve never really thought about your mother at all. I just kind of assumed it was always just you and the Captain.”

“It was,” she agreed. “I never knew her. I was told she died from illness when I was small, and I just assumed she was buried in some far off village somewhere.”

“Told?”

Felix was a lot more perceptive than people gave him credit for. It made sense with how good he was in battle. He picked up on small things to use them to his advantage. But he never seemed to turn it off. He could pinpoint things about people that they thought they could hide away. Or, in Byleth’s case, pick up on words that only heightened the mystery that was her past.

“I didn’t find out the truth until later. Until after my father died,” she admitted.

“And she’s buried here,” Felix pointed out. “But I thought you had never been to the Garreg Mach before you started the job here.”

“I was born here,” she told him, and glanced back down at her parents stone. “Apparently. But my mother didn’t make it. The reasons behind it were...complicated. My father had been skeptical about it, and once I was born the church had this weird fascination with me that made him nervous.” She hadn’t meant to tell him this but she was glad to. It felt nice to talk about her family, as foreign as it was. And a reassuring calm had washed over her, urging her on.

“There was a fire that year apparently,” she went on. “One that claimed a lot of the living quarters, ours included. Father had used the opportunity to steal me away. After the death of my mother he didn’t feel much of an attachment to the place, and he was worried about the church’s growing obsession with me. So he hid me in a bundle in the stables and went to deliver the news to Lady Rhea that the baby had perished in the fire.”

“Risky move,” Felix said. “Hiding a baby in the stables. What if you had cried? He would have been killed.”

“I never cried,” she told him.

Felix looked at her, an eyebrow raised. “All babies cry.”

“That’s why it was so weird that I didn’t,” she added. “When my father died, I found his journals. That’s how I found all of this out. In it, he said that I was a very stoic baby. I never laughed, never cried, never made a sound. I only spoke when I was older when I absolutely needed to.” She smiled to herself again. “As weird as it was, Father kind of loved it. He always said I was the perfect person to live with, not being one for idle conversation.”

There was a huff beside her that Byleth thought might have been a laugh.

“When the Captain died,” Felix said finally. “Everyone was so sad at the passing of a great knight that I feel like…” He paused, either to choose his words carefully or to recall himself. “Did anyone check on you?”

Byleth was quiet for a moment. She felt the sting of tears rising in her eyes and she wondered why such a simple question would incite such a reaction. The truth was, it wasn’t a straight forward answer. She didn’t have time to be checked on. She was thrust into the work of teaching, preparing her students for battle, and devising new tactics to fit the new enemies they were facing. She wasn’t quite sure she had time to be checked on.

Felix shifted uncomfortably beside her. “One of us should have...I mean...someone should have…”

“It was complicated,” Byleth tried.

“It always is. That isn’t an excuse.”

“You didn’t know,” she added.

“I did though.”

He looked down at his Rodrigue’s grave then. Byleth had almost forgotten that there had been a reason he was there in the first place. She felt a pang of guilt at having blubbered on about her own parents when Felix’s wound was still fresh. The grass hadn’t even begun to sprout on his father’s plot yet.

“How are you doing?” Byleth asked to break the tension. “After your father, I mean.”

Felix huffed again, a dark smile spreading across his face. “It’s complicated,” he parroted.

“I’ve been told that’s not an excuse.”

“Too true.” Felix pushed himself back up onto his feet and tore his gaze away from his father’s stone. “Maybe some other time. That storm is coming this way pretty quickly.”

Byleth looked over the cemetery walls toward the forest beyond. The clouds were darker now. Blades of lightning struck silently in the distance, hinting at the impending chaos. She wondered if they would affect her at all.

He nodded over toward the low glimmer of the dormitory windows. “Come on,” he said. “I’ll walk you back.”

She agreed, and pushed herself up onto her feet. “And you’ll tell me how you’re doing on the walk back?” she tried. “Complications and all?”

Felix huffed another amused breath and gestured toward the stairs. “Another time, perhaps,” he told her. “I don’t think the walk is quite long enough.”

#fe3h #fire emblem three houses #fire emblem #felix fraldarius #felix hugo fraldarius #byleth eisner #byleth #Byleth x Felix #felix x byleth #fe3h fanfic

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weissicles · 4 years

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Humanity and Catharsis: FE3H Crimson Flower Meta!

I finished the Crimson Flower route for Fire Emblem: Three Houses! Now it’s time for some meta. This isn’t spoiler-free and it’s pretty long... so read at your own risk! (Though, I’m pretty late to the party, so I’m sure you’re all way ahead of me...)

Byleth’s Ending

First and foremost, let me begin by saying that this ending has to be my favorite for Byleth. I mentioned in an earlier post that I am aware of the end results of the Azure Moon (AM), Verdant Wind (VW), and Silver Snow (SS) routes, despite still needing to play it. I still felt pleasantly surprised and very pleased to play through the CF route, especially for Byleth, because I truly believe this was the best ending for their character. Byleth loses their divine powers, becoming even more human than they were at the beginning of the game, and that’s pretty neat.

(Borrowed this image from r/Edelgard; thank you, u/BrilliantGenius)

I think the biggest reason why I love this ending so much for Byleth is because they return to being a real person. Throughout the whole game, the player gets to watch how Byleth, a traveling mercenary, realizes that they are connected to Sothis, the Goddess, and how they awaken their true powers. Byleth merges with Sothis in every route, but only in the CF route do they lose their divine powers, as killing Rhea results in the breaking of the crest stone in their heart. Why does this matter? Numerous times, Edelgard mentions how she wishes to end the tyrannical rule of the Children of the Goddess (CotG), particularly Rhea, because she perceives that humanity has moved past needing to be ruled by non-humans and the oppressive systems they’ve created. Edelgard is traumatized by her own horrendous past, which drives her to find ways to end suffering. She appears like any crazy, mad queen figure in the routes that cast her as an antagonist, but what remains true throughout all routes is her passion for finding ways for humans to be humans without unnecessary suffering. She desires to restore humanity to its dignified state by eliminating the CotG, which make sheep out of people.

That’s why Byleth--the one with divine powers, quite literally the Goddess Incarnate--returning to how she was at the beginning is so powerful. This person, who became a weapon to change the tides of war, now gets to be a normal human. The crest stone breaking and her heart beginning to beat for the very first time symbolizes the collapse of the crest system and the freedom from a system that hailed Byleth as a weapon rather than a person. What’s more, Edelgard, the lord fighting for ideals of humanity, is the first person to hear Byleth’s heartbeat. She is the first person to realize Byleth’s changes, to see how they become a person again. Her dream for Fodlan is realized first in the person she looks up to the most, the person who has fought by her side since the start of the story. If that’s not poetic, I don’t know what else to tell you.

Catharsis

Now, what about Edelgard?

Let’s not pretend that she isn’t controversial. She is, and for good reason. Presented as attractive and likeable regardless of your choice of house, Edelgard serves as the antagonist for 3 of 4 routes. She dies in every route except CF and that matters. She turns into a heartless, cold leader whose ruthlessness can no longer be justified as the bloodshed continues to worsen. In the eyes of the other lords and Rhea, there is no possible way for someone as crazed as Edelgard to live. And frankly? The way that she turns out without Byleth, that makes sense.

So, why does it matter that she lives in CF, and that we see her the way she is? In no other ending do we ever see Edelgard herself returning to a sense of being human. No other ending provides reason for why she should live. CF is the only route where we can explore her character in full, realize that she is just a girl after all, and that she is human, too. That is why it is only in CF do we see this: Edelgard crying.

Following the battle at Tailtean Plains and slaying Dimitri, Edelgard nearly cries when she talks about the fallen king. Now, this is just a headcanon of mine, but I imagine that she might have remembered something about him and their childhood at the mention of her nickname, El. (”To the fires of eternity with you, El...”) His death shakes her to the point of nearly crying, but she doesn’t. She even says that the Edelgard who sheds tears died a long time ago.

But she cries when she thinks Byleth is dying.

This is the moment when the Adrestian Emperor returns to who she really is: Edelgard. Unable to help herself, Edelgard experiences grief and reacts as any person might by crying for the person she loves. She does something she hasn’t done in years, probably since she’s been a very young child in the dungeons underneath the palace in Enbarr. Why? Because she loves Byleth and losing someone you love should break you. This scene goes to show how Edelgard cares deeply for her teacher to the point of experiencing loss. When she realizes that Byleth may yet be alive (since the crest stone broke), she presses her head to her chest, hears her heartbeat for the first time, and starts to laugh. Yes, she laughs! Quietly, and mangled with the sound of some tears, which we can assume are shed out of pure joy that their professor is alive.

Here we see that Edelgard, like Byleth, is returning to a more human state. She’s finally allowed some catharsis, a major resolution to her suppressed character. Throughout the whole game, Edelgard has been nothing but repressed, constantly wearing the mask of Emperor, bound by duty, unable to be truly free. Without Byleth, she becomes even more inhuman as she really becomes more tyrannical. But with Byleth, like her teacher, she becomes more human, able to express feelings, able to be warm, able to experience loss because she loved.

Now, this is my more personal take on it, but I have always liked the thought of Edelgard and Byleth being more romantic than platonic following the timeskip. It’s heavily hinted that Edelgard has always taken a keen interest on the professor. What initially begins as a hope that Byleth may side with her turns into an actual desire to walk with her and experience a new dawn with her. Interestingly, the Japanese version has Edelgard more explicit with her romantic feelings than in the English version. Regardless of whether you read their relationship as romantic or platonic, I think this ending makes it clear that Byleth and Edelgard are equal, humans, people who care for one another and work well together. Byleth fulfills their role as more than an advisor. They are a mentor, a friend, and even family (see their ability to call Edelgard “El”, a name only Edelgard’s father and Dimitri use in CF). In that way, this route’s final message is this: that to love is to be human, and to be human is ultimately to love. That is why I really think that this route is the best possible outcome for Edelgard and especially for Byleth.

Other Takes

While I was disappointed that it was only 18 chapters long, CF does take a more direct approach, as the tides shift significantly when Byleth sides with the Empire. I would have liked if Claude and Dimitri played a more prominent role, though I know that CF focuses mainly on Edelgard and the BE’s against the Church of Seiros. I really think there was potential for Claude and Edelgard to be something besides a warring emperor and a neutral leader. I will admit: Edelclaude is a crack ship of mine. But I find their similar views on the church, their dreams of a new dawn for Fodlan, and their odd interactions to be interesting enough. I understand why Claude either must die or leave (for Almyra). If he hadn’t, that could have changed the way the war turned out, ultimately lessening Byleth’s role. It’s an interesting thought for a canon-divergent story. And let’s be real: Edelgard and Claude somewhat flirting while they face off in Derdriu? Ain’t slick at all!

And Dimitri... Oh, poor Dimitri. My best friend and roommate just finished AM and was so defeated by Edelgard’s death because of her relationship with Dimitri. They’re a tragic set of people, Edelgard and Dimitri, and it makes sense that in both AM and CF, one of them must die. Still, I was so shaken by Dimitri’s last words before Edelgard personally executes him in CF. I would like to think that that was not easy for her at all. I would like to think that she remembered him, at least a bit, and that she felt something there as she killed him. I don’t know what else I would have wanted out of Dimitri in CF, but I know I wanted something more. AM does a great job of providing good angst from Dimitri’s side. It would have been nice to see that from Edelgard’s side as well.

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All in all, CF was a great route and may remain my favorite route, as I’m very impressed by Edelgard as a character. We’ll see! It��ll be a while until I play another route, but suffice to say that I’m floored by FE3H’s story, characters, and world. What a beautiful game, through and through!

#fe3h #fe3h spoilers #crimson flower #crimson flower spoilers #bhu speaks #meta #byleth eisner #edelgard von hresvelg #long post #edeleth #honestly this doesn't have to be edeleth #but let's tag that anyway #analysis #personal take #bhu plays

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ao3komorii · 3 years

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Return to You (Timeskip Ashe/Reader)

This one is another Byleth one, but again, I don’t use any names for Reader and it’s all 2nd POV. This one is set after the BL route end, but no S rank happened with Ashe. Also slight canon divergence in that Rhea retains control of the church after the game end because it worked better for plot purposes, but other than that, nothing big has changed. Again, there is smut at the end!

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You had been feeling antsy for a while after you had gotten back to Garreg Mach after Edelgard was finally defeated. Lady Rhea had been rescued and once again stepped up as Archbishop of the Church of Seiros and arrangements had been made for more students to join the academy as soon as routes were cleared safe and treaties had been formed to unite the land under King Dimitri’s rule. Relative peace had settled on the land, but that didn’t mean that no dissenters were left who wished harm on Fódlan. Quite a few of your former students were happy to come back as teachers at the academy, but you were feeling more and more restless as the days went by and the beginning of the school year rapidly approached. You wanted to be out in the world again, helping the citizens of Fódlan yourself. Not sent out sparingly for missions with students, but making the world a better place with your own power. You could no longer be a teacher, your racing mind would not allow it.

You had arranged to see Lady Rhea early in the morning when not even Seteth had joined her in her chamber yet. She listened as you explained your request, her eyes as sad as the day she lost you to the cliff, but she took what you had to say seriously.

“You wish to travel as a mercenary again?” she clarified, and you nodded resolutely.

“Very well. You have been a great ally to the church, but I see so much of your father within you. I will not stop you from doing what you feel you need to do,” she told you.

You were about to leave when she raised a hand to stop you from turning away from her.

“Will you not tell the others before you leave?” she asked, eyes full of concern. “They all care for you and will be hurt if you do not tell them yourself.”

You knew that she was right. But you also knew what would happen. None of them wanted you to leave, especially since you did not yet know if you would ever return once you left. They would be upset at you for leaving without telling them, but there was no other option in your mind. It especially hurt at the moment to picture Ashe, who had been as excited to be a teacher alongside you, robbed of that chance. But you had to leave, and you knew that you would not have the strength to do so if any of them tried to convince you otherwise. So you shook your head, eyes breaking contact with Rhea, and she smiled sadly.

“I will tell them, then,” she volunteered. “Professor… please stay safe. There will always be a place for you if you ever want to return to us.”

You nodded and then turned your back to her and left the audience chamber. You had felt so strongly about this decision that you had already packed what few important things you wanted to take with you, and you briskly walked back to your dormitory to get your bag, slinging it over one shoulder. You looked at the rising dawn as you walked out and away from Garreg Mach, regretful that you were leaving, but knowing nothing else would ease your restless soul.

Ashe had been a broken man since the day you had left. Rhea had asked for him to come to her private study mid-morning that day, and he had presumed that it was related to his new teaching position at the academy. Never did he imagine that it would be to tell him that you had left, and were possibly never coming back. He should have known the moment he walked in and saw Rhea’s serious expression that something was wrong. Bandits, or maybe slightly larger than usual class sizes were things he would have easily believed were the problem. Not you. He put on a brave face for Lady Rhea, telling her that he hoped you found what you were looking for, and then Lady Rhea allowed him to leave, as she easily saw through his façade of courage. His heart was crumbling piece by piece as he walked to his room, feeling emotionless and barely able to move one foot ahead of the other. Arriving at his room, he realized that he couldn’t recall the walk over at all.

He made it only a few steps into his room before he collapsed upon himself, barely managing to close the door behind him. The tears came easily as he reached into one of his drawers to hold the simple silver banded ring with a green stone in the center to his chest. He felt like his entire future had been stolen from him. He knew he should be upset with you, hate you, blame you for what had happened, but he loved you so much that all he could do was weep with despair. He wished that you would have told him that you wanted to leave; he would go anywhere if it meant that he would be by your side. But he understood why you chose not to say goodbye. You didn’t want to interfere with his decision to stay here. Although you had not realized he was so excited to be a teacher in large part because he would be where you would be. He could only hope that someday you would come back to him. He would wait forever for you.

Ashe was one of the most popular teachers at the academy. He was knowledgeable and kind, and the students all loved him; the boys admired his skills and the girls were smitten by his handsome profile. They all adored the caring professor, but they didn’t have the background knowledge that some of the others at the monastery did.

Annette and Mercedes had both taken positions within the school as well, both happy to pass their skills on to the next generation and keep the world as peaceful as it had become after the war. The lively and kind Ashe the new students saw did not fool them for one second. They had been informed of your departure soon after Ashe had, and had both been devastated, not only within themselves but for their friend as well. Anyone could see how Ashe loved you, except you. Mercedes knew that if you had known about his feelings, you would not have left him like that. He put his all into his new job as a teacher, but they had both noticed that his smile dropped whenever he thought he was alone. He stopped reading for pleasure, and Annette assumed it was because it reminded him too much of the times Ashe had talked to you about the books he had read. They knew he thought about you a lot, even after many months of you being gone with no messages or signs of returning, and Mercedes and Annette both felt helpless to help their friend out of his unending sorrow.

Annette had baked Ashe some sweets that had always cheered her up when she was feeling down, and Mercedes had tried to talk to him, but neither tactic worked. Ashe put his all into his work and seemed hollow through it all, but never let his feelings affect the quality of his teaching. Annette had tried to get him excited about the upcoming ball that the church was putting on, and reminisced about the ball the year they were all students in this place. Ashe replied in kind, but Annette noticed he purposefully left out any mention of you. It was obvious that his mind was always on you, but he went out of his way not to mention any memories that concerned you. It was as if he would crumble on the spot if he even thought about you around others. Annette couldn’t even remember the last time Ashe had said your name out loud.

This ball would be a success, the women decided, even if they had to force Ashe to eat some food and do some dancing. He would enjoy the event, that they were determined to see through. Which would begin with them getting together the morning of the ball and making their special puffed pastries, the ones that their students couldn’t get enough of every time they made them. They giggled about their later plans as they purchased some ingredients at the marketplace, getting everything they needed rather easily. Annette looked up to Mercedes curiously when her friend did not respond to a question she had asked, but her eyes were elsewhere.

“Annie!” Mercedes gasped, hand grabbing her friend’s shoulder as she pointed over to the gate just as a small hooded figure entered, the hood doing nothing to dissuade the two women of their immediate surety at the identity of the figure.

You just felt numb after a while. You were a one-woman army, wiping out bandits and rescuing innocent people from dangerous situations. You were doing what you wanted… what you thought you wanted to do, so why was it that you saw Ashe’s face every time you closed your eyes? No matter what you did, you could not help but recall the look in Ashe’s eyes when you had to go after his adoptive father, when he learned of the death of someone he cared about, when he was forced to kill or be killed by his former classmates. You hadn’t died, but you had left Garreg Mach, left him, without planning to ever return. Your chest burned when you realized just how stupid you had been.

You knew that you were missing something, and you thought that you would find it out here, travelling around and helping people as you had once done with your father. But being alone just highlighted for you all that you had left behind when you made such a dumb, rash decision. Some villages would throw a celebration when you rid their travel routes of bandits, but you never went, instead forgoing sleep to travel onto the next place. You had just left another town at sundown when you realized that you had absentmindedly been obeying your own secret wants when the path you were on started to seem familiar. You realized immediately that you were only a few hours travel from Garreg Mach.

Immediately you felt the need to turn around and go back, find a route that would lead you elsewhere. You hurt everyone by leaving like that, and you knew it. If you went back now, you were not sure that you would never feel the desire to leave again. You couldn’t go back now and then hurt them all over again. You tried in vain to convince yourself that going back would be a bad choice, but you knew it was useless. You wanted to see everyone again, and you knew it. You wanted to see Ashe so badly that it hurt, and you would sprint all night to get there if it meant that you could see him sooner. But you had to admit that after fighting for hours, you would probably collapse before you could make it there. You begrudgingly set up to sleep in a grassy field, knowing you would be up as soon as you got enough sleep to be functional and back on the road to the monastery.

You had no idea what time it was when you woke up, but the sun had almost fully risen, and you brushed the grass off of your clothes and packed your few belongings and set off to continue onwards to the place you were aching to be. You walked for hours without stopping, but your feet did not feel sore at all. Eventually your feelings of guilt were overtaken almost entirely with excitement to be back, especially now that you were close enough to see the monastery in the distance. You had to resist the urge to run as you got closer and closer to the marketplace entrance. As you reached the gate, you adjusted the hood of your cloak; you thought it would be smarter to make a stealthy entrance and not attract too much attention and get swarmed. Looking around to see the merchants conducting business as usual made you feel like you hadn’t been away for months, and the familiarity relaxed you. You were so caught up, however, that you failed to notice two women sneaking up to you until they each linked an arm through one of yours and began to somewhat drag you towards the entrance of the monastery.

Panicked, you looked over to see Annette and Mercedes on either side of you. You must have looked as startled and confused as you felt, because Mercedes just giggled at you with a smile.

“We knew it was you right away, Professor,” she told you.

“Yeah!” Annette chimed in. “We’d know it was you even if you wore a full suit of armor made out of peacock feathers!”

You weren’t sure where Annette had acquired that metaphor, but you allowed them to take you around the corner and past the fishing pond and greenhouse, and straight into Mercedes’ room. Annette waved off the concerns of a professor you passed on your way, informing them that she and Mercedes were simply showing a new student around, and the professor let you on your way. Annette quickly closed the door behind her and they both let go of their hold on your arms.

“I felt bad lying to a professor, even though I know we’re professors now too!” Annette confessed with a guilty smile.

“I feel the same way, Annie!” Mercedes agreed, before their glances both settled on you.

“Professor!” Annette cried out as she hugged you with more force than you thought she possessed. “We thought you were never coming back!”

Mercedes smiled warmly at you before she joined the hug as well. “We all missed you dearly!”

You found their enthusiasm contagious and returned their smiles as your hood fell entirely off your head from the force of their hugs. They eventually pulled back and allowed you to breathe again. You knew you should say something, but nothing you could think of would undo the hurt you had caused by taking off without saying anything so many months ago.

“Please do not worry,” Mercedes said. “You do not have to explain things to us right this moment.”

“That’s right!” Annette added. “And besides, there’s the ball tonight to worry about!”

You blinked as you took in the information. It was around the right time of year for the ball, but there hadn’t been one in so long that it had slipped your mind. You remembered the one and only ball you had been present for as Annette suddenly squealed in joy.

“Mercie, do you still have that dress that you made for the fall festival?” Annette asked.

“Oh, yes!” Mercedes nodded, pulling a basket out from under her bed and retrieving a beautiful blue dress from inside while Annette looked at you sternly.

“I know I said we could talk about this later, but you can’t just leave us like that again!” she said, but she didn’t seem angry. Mercedes looked sad, but did not interrupt Annette. “Mercie and I have each other, but you’re everything to Ashe.”

“He’s been so sad since you left,” Mercedes added. “But you’re looking just as sad now, Professor.”

“I… want to see him,” you admitted, head hung low. You didn’t deserve to see Ashe after the pain you had caused him, but the women in front of you did not agree.

“Well, great!” Annette cheered. “Because we’re going to get you ready to surprise him at the ball!”

“I have the perfect shade of eyeshadow to compliment your hair,” Mercedes added.

You were surprised, but allowed Mercedes to seat you in her chair. In truth, you were grateful that you would have more time to work up the nerve to see him. You just hoped that he didn’t hate you. Annette told you that they had been in the process of making some pastries for the event, and so she decided to do it alone to not disappoint the students, leaving you in Mercedes’ care, but not before telling you both that she would be back immediately after she had finished baking. After Annette gave you one more hug and left, Mercedes spoke up.

“Professor… did you sleep in mud? You’re filthy.”

You hadn’t realized until now, but she was right. You were in no state to attend a ball with your current level of cleanliness. Mercedes simply laughed and then put the hood of your cloak back on and ushered both of you to the bath house. After checking that it was empty, Mercedes stood guard outside while you bathed quickly and then redressed. You felt cleaner than you had in a long time, as you largely bathed in bodies of water while you were gone, which could not compare to the bathhouse. Mercedes was chatting with a female student when you walked out, and you made sure to hang your head low so your face could not be seen. You didn’t mind whether you saw Ashe now or later in the day, but Mercedes and Annette were so excited about their plan that they didn’t want to ruin it, and you found that you didn’t want to ruin the surprise either.

Mercedes smoothly finished her conversation as if she hadn’t been waiting on you, and you passed by the student, walking side by side with Mercedes back to her room, going undetected. You removed your ratty cloak entirely after the door was closed, sitting down on the chair again.

“You haven’t eaten yet, have you?” she asked you, and you shook your head. You hadn’t eaten since the afternoon the day before if you recalled correctly.

“I bought some cookies at the market while Annie and I were out shopping today; they should tide you over until dinner,” she said, grabbing a wrapped package from her desk and handing it over to you. You unwrapped it as Mercedes started to assemble her makeup supplies.

“They’re made with chopped up noa fruit,” she explained. “I didn’t think that noa fruit would taste good in cookies, but they’ve become a favorite of mine as of late.”

“Thank you, Mercedes,” you said, for more than just the cookies, and she giggled knowingly.

Your conversation dissolved into silence, but it was a comfortable silence. Mercedes organized her makeup in front of her as she began to apply different things to your face. She insisted that you could not look in a mirror until she was done, and so you trusted her and relaxed while she did who knows what to you, having you tilt your head in all directions as she worked.

“You’re all done!” she announced at last, finally grabbing the mirror and holding it out in front of you.

You almost didn’t believe it was you. Mercedes had really worked her magic, and it showed. Every touch of makeup flattered your face, and you were starting to think that you had been staring at your own reflection for too long when the door to Mercedes’ room burst open. You turned to look at Annette, who was now wearing a nice dress, and she gaped at you.

“You look so pretty!” she exclaimed loudly.

“Annie, close the door!” Mercedes scolded her, and she quickly shut it behind her with an apology.

“You did a really good job!” Annette complimented her friend.

“Do you need help with yours too?” Mercedes asked, and Annette excitedly agreed.

“I can never get my blush as nice as you can do it,” Annette admitted shyly as you stood up and Annette took your place in the improvised makeup chair.

“I should have just enough time to do our makeup and then get over to the ball,” Mercedes replied, starting to smooth a little blush across Annette’s cheeks, leaving pale pink in its wake.

“I can’t wait to see Ashe’s face when he sees you, Professor!” Annette squealed. “I do feel bad hiding you from him though…”

“It’ll all be worth it when they reunite again,” Mercedes said happily.

They were being so nice to you, even though you didn’t deserve it. All you had gotten was one light scolding from Annette, but you knew that you deserved much more. They were acting like you hadn’t run off like a spoiled kid, and they had every right to hate you and send you back where you came from. You didn’t deserve any of them, that was crystal clear to you. You would repay their kindness by never leaving them again, you decided. Your place was here by their side… by Ashe’s side. If he would even have you. If he felt the same way that you had realized that you did. You wanted to see him so badly, but now that it was getting closer to the start of the ball, you felt nerves creeping up.

You watched as Mercedes put the finishing touches on Annette’s makeup before they switched places and Mercedes sat down in her chair to do her own makeup while Annette excitedly bounded over to you.

“You should put on the dress!” she said, holding up the dress from its position on the bed next to you.

“It will look wonderful on you,” Mercedes chimed in as she began applying her own makeup.

“It’ll be okay,” Annette said quietly, when you had yet to take the dress from her grasp. “I do have experience with this sort of thing, Professor.”

Mercedes simply glanced back at you and Annette with a smile before she picked up a container and a brush and turned back to what she was doing, and Annette continued.

“I know it wasn’t for the same reason, but my father felt the same as you do now after abandoning my mother and I,” she told you, and noted the slight change in your facial expression at her words. “I don’t mean to make you feel bad. You came back to us a lot sooner than he did.”

“I’m sorry…” It was all you could think to say. You felt like such an idiot for causing pain to everyone.

“You don’t have to apologize,” she said sincerely. “Just promise us that you’ll talk to Ashe tonight.”

You nodded, and Annette smiled happily. You really weren’t sure what you did to deserve her and Mercedes’ kindness, but you were grateful. There wasn’t much time left before the ball, so you reluctantly began to take your current clothes off and put the dress on. You were somewhat uncomfortable, as you just wore your normal attire to the last ball, and you had never gotten this dressed up before. You looked down at the dress; it was very beautiful, the front of the dress coming down to your knees while the back extended to your ankles to allow mobility. You were so fixated on the dress that you were surprised when you looked up to see that Mercedes had changed into her own dress already. How much time had passed while you were gawking?

“Ready to go?” Annette asked, and you and Mercedes nodded.

Annette squealed happily, hopping up off the bed and rushing over to open the door ever so slightly and peeking out.

“…Annie?” Mercedes probed.

“I have to make sure the coast is clear!” Annette replied with a giggle. “I feel like we’re all spies!”

“I certainly am excited to see how Ashe reacts!” Mercedes said happily.

Their excitement was catching, and you found yourself drawn in as well as you all made your way to the ball, as stealthily as possible at Annette’s insistence. She had joked that you all should’ve become assassins instead, and Mercedes had suggested that her new sneaking prowess would be useful if she wanted seconds of dessert. By the time you had all gotten just outside of the ball, you had all been smiling and laughing too much to convincingly assassinate anyone.

Annette stopped your conversation right outside the hall with a finger to her lips. “I’ll go in and find Ashe and tell him he has a surprise!”

“Oh, I can’t wait to see you two dance together!” Mercedes gushed.

You shook your head. They were perfect conspirators. You knew that you would never have the courage to face him without their help. But you really, really wanted to see him, to talk to him again, so you let those feelings drive you.

“I’m gonna ask him to dance! He’s just been standing there looking bored!”

Ashe was surprised to hear the female student’s comment. He hadn’t meant to look bored, but he had looked over to see the student and her friend looking over at him, so their comment had to be directed his way. He tried to remain cheerful, but more and more lately he had been told that he seemed distracted. He wasn’t quite sure why, but your absence had been wearing on him more than usual as of late, and he assumed that it was because the ball was coming up, which reminded him of your meeting at the goddess tower. The first and only ball he had experienced had largely been a disaster, and he cringed at the memory of all of the times that he had stepped on girls’ feet. He had thought that he was unsuited for balls since he was a commoner, and the ball had solidified that thought for him.

But you had turned his night around for the better. You had danced with him after you talked at the goddess tower, and he had not stepped on your toes even once. That may have been the night that he realized that he felt something for you, he mused. He knew that all he was doing was making the hole in his heart bigger, but thinking of you was all he could do ever since you left. He had zoned out again without realizing it, and came back to reality to see Annette waving a hand in front of his face, looking concerned.

“Are you okay?” she asked.

“I…” Ashe knew better than to lie to his friend, but he didn’t know what else to say that she hadn’t already heard.

To his surprise, Annette didn’t seem put off at all, her lips forming a bright smile as she grabbed him by his arm and began to drag him towards the entrance of the hall, leaving Ashe to sputter her name and put effort into retaining his balance.

“Where are we going?” he asked, completely unsure of Annette’s intentions.

“It’s a surprise!” she replied cryptically, and Ashe continued to walk with her until they were just in front of the archway that led outside. Annette spun on him so fast he wasn’t sure how she didn’t get whiplash.

“Annette, what-”

“Close your eyes!” she interrupted him, repeating her demand again when he only stared at her incredulously. He reluctantly slid his eyes closed, but could feel Annette’s gaze scrutinizing him, trying to figure out whether his eyes were fully closed or not. Finally, she let out a satisfied hum. “Okay… just please don’t be mad at me!”

He didn’t have the chance to ask her why he would be mad, because he heard her footsteps scampering off a moment later. He decided to put his faith in her and kept his eyes closed, wondering what this surprise could be. With his eyes closed, he focused on the noise around him, students and staff alike wondering what the two professors were doing. He sighed; Annette really had a knack for getting him in strange situations. He recalled the time that they had been assigned to clean the tower that they had both assumed was haunted; he never felt he would feel more relieved than when they had put that experience behind them.

“Okay, he’s got his eyes closed! Let’s go in!” Annette said as soon as she spotted you and Mercedes hiding behind a pillar outside.

“We won’t get in your way,” Mercedes said as you all entered the hall. “You two really need some alone time, after all.”

You blushed at Mercedes’ implication, but she just giggled at you as her and Annette separated themselves from you. You did not have a chance to protest because any words died on your tongue the moment you saw Ashe. His hair was a little longer than it had last been, but his handsome face was just as you had dreamt about for months. His eyes were closed, just as Annette had said, and you immediately made your way over, stopping right in front of him.

“Annette…?” he questioned, and you smiled at the sound of his voice, softly speaking his name in return.

His reaction was so quick that it might have been comical had you not been so desperate to see him. His green eyes flew open and he stared at you in shock for all of three seconds before he closed the gap between you, wrapping his arms around you so tightly that you could tell that he was afraid that you were not really here. You wrapped your arms around him as well, and he whispered your name in a voice that sounded like he was about to cry. He eventually pulled away, but his hands moved to your upper arms, afraid to break physical contact with you.

“Ashe!” Annette hissed as she approached you. “Dance with her!”

Ashe looked from her to you as if he had just remembered where he was and he blinked, shaking his head slightly. “Would you…?” he trailed off awkwardly, and you eagerly nodded your head, which sent a bright smile to his face as he took your head and led you onto the dance floor.

Your connected hands stayed together as his other hand came to your waist and yours to rest on his shoulder. You both began to sway to the music, unwilling to break eye contact with each other as all other sounds in the room drifted away.

“I’m so happy you’re back,” Ashe said at last.

You were relieved that he didn’t seem angry at all, and the two of you smiled at each other until the music ended, not parting from each other at all.

“Can we… take a walk outside?” he asked, and you nodded. He kept your hand in his as your other hands dropped from each other and the two of you walked past other dancing pairs of students and staff alike.

“Who is she?”

“I’ve never seen Professor Ashe like that before…”

Even through his excitement, Ashe’s cheeks felt hot as he heard the voices of his students as you passed by them. But your smiling face distracted him again as the chilly outside air hit him. You were here… really here. He felt dizzy with happiness, so consumed that the cold outside did not bother him at all. He almost couldn’t look at you, you looked so beautiful. Your hair had been done up especially for the ball, and you were wearing makeup, likely Mercedes’ work. He couldn’t look at you without his cheeks feeling hot and he desperately hoped that you didn’t think he was avoiding looking at you.

You thought that you had been wandering aimlessly, but you looked ahead to see that you had wandered towards the Goddess Tower. The ball had just began in the past hour, so the tower was empty of any people at the moment. You stared up at the tower, nostalgia flaring from within you as you looked from the tower’s outer walls to the man beside you.

“I didn’t realize we were walking here,” Ashe said fondly. “That night, so long ago… you took the time to comfort me, even though I have no status or crest.”

You gave him a hard look as you shook your head. All of that had never mattered to you; Ashe was a good person and that was all that counted in your books.

“I know now that all of those things don’t matter to you,” he said, smiling gently. “But what you said mattered so much to me. That night meant everything to me.”

Ashe stopped just before you both entered the tower, causing you to bump into him. You looked up at him in surprise and his stare back was unwavering.

“I was so lonely without you,” he admitted with a sad smile. “You were always on my mind. I wondered where you went, if you were doing alright… if you would ever come back to us.”

Your guilt returned full force as you felt ready to cry, but Ashe would have none of it. “I’m happy you’re back, and I won’t let you go again.”

He was fast, but not fast enough for your battle instincts. Ashe’s eyes closed and he leaned down towards you and you knew what was coming. And you allowed your own eyes to close as you leaned up slightly to meet him halfway. The kiss felt like it had been a long time coming, and as soon as he knew that you wanted this as much as he did, you could feel happiness radiating off of him as he pulled away.

“I love you so much,” he said, and you pulled him down into another kiss.

He let out a surprised groan but happily returned your kiss, one hand threading through your hair as he got as close to you as he possibly could. You placed your hands on his chest as the sweet kiss continued until you both had to pause to breathe.

You were both immediately on guard when you heard excited voices heading your way. You both quickly rushed to hide against a wall outside of the tower, hoping the dark would conceal you both. You both held your breath as a young couple strolled by, heading towards the tower. As soon as they had both walked in, you and Ashe rushed away from the tower. You giggled; you were doing so much sneaking around today. But this time your stomach was on fire with butterflies since you and Ashe had kissed. You found yourself hoping that you could find somewhere more private. You could not get enough of his presence, and you truly knew in this moment that having him by your side was all that you had wanted.

You found yourselves right at the edge of the dorms, where your room is... was. You weren’t sure if they had cleaned it out for a student to use instead. For the first time, you hesitated as you stared at the door, not able to tell if there was a new occupant or not. Ashe saw through your silence and followed the direction of your gaze instantly.

“It’s still yours,” he said, and you looked over to him. “None of us could bring ourselves to give it away. It felt like… we would be giving up hope.”

You marched up to the door, unable to control your desire to confirm that what he was saying was true. You had spent so much time in that room and knew that you would only relax when you opened the door and saw that everything was as you had left it. You only stopped when you realized that Ashe had not come with you. You looked back to see him staring longingly at you, but he bit his lip and looked away from you. You continued to stare at him as you walked back over, but he still wouldn’t look at you.

“I’ll leave you to rest, then…” he trailed off as he made to turn away from you.

Why was he acting like this? You grabbed his hand before he could leave you, and he looked surprised but didn’t resist as you frowned at him before dragging him with you into your room. You stood in front of the door, facing Ashe, who now stood in the middle of your room. You weren’t sure why he was so eager to run away from you, but he wasn’t going to leave here until he talked to you. He looked reluctant to speak up until he saw just how worried you were as you looked at him imploringly.

“I’m sorry… I haven’t been in here since you left and it just reminds me of all that went through my head when you left,” he admitted sadly. “All I could think about is if it was my fault… if I wasn’t a commoner, if I came from more decent roots. If I could have made you not want to leave.”

Your heart dropped. You thought that he would be angry with you, sad and disappointed in you. But you hadn’t taken Ashe’s past into account, and his overly kind and sensitive nature. You had never thought that he would blame himself for your disappearance, and you were mentally kicking yourself now for overlooking just how badly you would hurt him by leaving. You felt like you could cry as you shook your head back and forth to deny his thought process. His upbringing and lack of aristocratic title and parentage had never mattered to you, not as much as his kind and gentle personality did. But you had left him without telling him why, of course he would turn to his own insecurities to cope with the loss.

You couldn’t think of the words to say to convey to him that it was absolutely not his fault that you had left. That you wouldn’t leave him again. That you wanted to be with him. You slowly removed yourself from blocking the door to approach him, reaching up to brush your fingers against the tears collecting in his eyes and wiping them away. He stared at you, confused, sad, but staring at you with such expectation in his expression. It was as if he could read your mind, and he leaned down slightly just as you leaned your face towards his and you found yourself tasting the salt of his tears on his lips.

He pressed back only slightly; it was the only difference you noticed in his posture at all. You pulled back and opened your eyes just as Ashe did. He looked to be struggling for words just as much as you were, but he closed his eyes again as you leaned in and kissed him again. He relaxed much more this time, but you found yourself wanting to push him further and you opened your eyes just slightly in order to grab one of his hands that was just dangling at his side. You were faster than he could properly react to, and you lifted his hand and pressed his hand to your chest, quickly removing your hold and pressing down on his fingers, causing his fingers to squeeze your breast. The effect was quite immediate as his eyes opened and he completely disengaged himself from you, face redder than you had ever seen it.

“It wasn’t your fault,” you said simply, moving closer to him again. “…I love you.”

“You… you do?” Ashe gaped at you, surprise slowly melting into a beautiful smile.

You nodded, a smile coming to your face as you locked eyes with the flustered boy. He broke eye contact, his eyes darting around the room briefly as he fiddled with his clothing, somehow even more red in the face that he had been only moments ago. You weren’t sure what had happened until he spoke up again as he held his hand out to you.

“Before you left, I bought this,” he said, and your focus tunneled onto the small silver ring in his hand. “I wanted to… I mean, I still want to marry you.”

You knew what rings meant, but were still shocked into silence at his words. He looked like he was pushing himself to continue talking as you stared him down.

“I thought that if I didn’t always keep it with me, I was giving up hope of you ever returning… you don’t have to accept if you don’t want to, I will respect whatever decision-”

You realized immediately that you had something in one of your drawers that you had forgotten to pack when you left. You rushed past Ashe without taking the ring he held out and opened one of your drawers, retrieving the ring your father had given you. You excitedly picked it up before you realized that you had left Ashe standing there, ring outstretched in his hand, staring at you with unsurety. You offered a bashful smile his way as you held up the ring out to him and his eyes went wide.

“I never would have thought you would have a ring for me too,” Ashe admitted happily, a pink flush setting in his cheeks as he smiled sweetly at you.

You watched all the doubt drain from his face as you finally took the ring from his hand, replacing it with the one you had for him. He stared at your ring in the palm of his hand like it was a treasure or a relic from a lost time, instead of the simple band it was. He picked it up with the utmost care, placing it on his ring finger and staring at it in awe as you as you giggled and placed your new band on your own finger. Ashe had been so out of it since you first entered the ball, but now he finally seemed to be coming back to himself. You both smiled at each other, but it didn’t seem to be good enough for either of you as you closed the gap between the two of you again, and his eyes drifted to the side before looking desperately into yours. You weren’t sure how he hadn’t passed out with how flushed he had been for the past few minutes.

“Can I-” He was struggling to speak up. “…can I touch you?”

You nodded, already deciding to push him a little further as you reached to the top of your strapless dress and pulled it down and off of you faster than you thought possible. The dress had built-in support, so with it off, you were now completely unclothed aside from your underwear and boots. Ashe’s gaze only momentarily drifted to your body before he looked back at your eyes with a blissful smile.

“You’re so beautiful,” he said, reaching out to brush some stray hair from your face as you leaned into each other for a short kiss, your hands gripping the front of his shirt. As you slowly parted, he took in the sight of your hands on his clothing. “I suppose I should also…”

He looked a little overwhelmed, but was unable to keep a grin off of his face as he reached down to fumble with the buttons on his shirt. A few seconds and only one clasp undone, you reached up to help him out, quickly getting both layers of shirts undone and exposing his chest and stomach. You placed a hand on his chest, right over his heart, and were surprised at how warm he was. You also immediately noticed just how fast his heart was beating under your palm. He shrugged his layers off, and you stepped back from him as he gathered his shirts and bent over to place them gently beside your dress on the floor. You looked from the clothing pile to Ashe as he cleared his throat nervously, his hands awkwardly fiddling with the clasp on his pants.

“Are you okay?” you asked him. He had been a blushing, nervous mess, and you were worried that this was all too much too fast for him. You had a lifetime’s worth of happiness from the ring you now wore, and you would happily wait until he was ready. You had so much more time with him now that you were intent on not leaving him ever again.

“I’ve never done anything like this before,” he admitted hesitantly. “The last thing I want to do is disappoint you.”

Disappoint you? It was as if he didn’t know himself at all. He was a great man, and you knew that he could never disappoint you, at least nowhere as bad as you had done to him. You would have to get that thought out of his head immediately. Concerned for his ability to remain standing if you went a bit further, you guided him back to sit on your bed, which he obeyed, somewhat stunned.

You eagerly climbed onto his lap, and he rushed to place his hands on your waist to steady you. He accepted your kiss readily, but seemed somewhat squirmy, and as you figured out why as your bodies were pressed into each other. You felt exactly how hard he was as you unintentionally ground your hips into his as you adjusted yourself in his lap, and he moaned into the kiss. You felt as one of his hands remove its grip on your waist to move to the front of his pants, and you realized that he may be in some pain, so you moved away from him, feet back on the floor as you stood before him. Before you had fully disengaged yourself from him physically, touch still lingering on his shoulders, he caught your hand with his hand that had moved from your waist and you stared down at him, confused.

He gazed up at you so adoringly that it would have made you feel shy if you weren’t consumed with the same feeling that he was. You were both happy to be in the presence of each other that even the incredibly new experience of being unclothed around each other felt perfectly natural and comfortable.

“I should…” he trailed off, letting go of your hand to unclasp his pants with one fast movement.

Ashe let out a sigh of relief as he pushed both his pants and underwear down and off his hips, adjusting himself so he could let them fall to the floor. Despite exposing himself fully to you, he was transfixed on your movements as you reached down to let your underwear drop to the floor as well. As you smiled at each other, you mused that you would never have thought even a few days prior that you would ever be here with him like this. You could not have been happier that you had decided to abandon your plans and come back to be here with Ashe.

You placed a hand on his shoulder, and he allowed you control, moving himself so he was laying back on the bed. You ran one hand down his cheek as you slowly straddled him, holding yourself just below his pelvis on his upper thighs. You were so close to a point that you didn’t think there was any coming back from. But you found you didn’t care. You wanted this so badly, and Ashe had been more than obvious in his desire as well.

“You’re so pretty,” he whispered, panting lightly, his cheeks pink, but you didn’t think you were any better in that regard.

You wanted to smile back at him, but you shifted in his lap and brushed against his cock and he closed his eyes with a moan. You realized that you could no longer wait, and you lifted yourself up, looking away from his face to line yourself up with his cock, taking it in one hand as you prepared to sink down onto him. You intended to take it slow, adjust to the likely intrusive feeling, but you found that you took him in with very little resistance from your own body, and then decided to take him in all at once, failing to consider Ashe’s own adjustment process, which you quickly realized as he groaned loudly as he bottomed out within you. You let out a ragged gasp as you were hit with the feeling of being so full in a way that you had never been before.

You realized that you had clearly moved too fast for him, and you were determined not to move until he was ready. This would not only be on your terms; you would never make an important decision without him again, and while this one was not as important in the long run, you wanted this to be a mutually enjoyable experience.

“It’s… okay,” Ashe groaned. “Please…”

That was all you needed, and you slowly lifted yourself back slightly and then forward back onto him, and his gasp and a pleasant feeling tingling in your lower body were your rewards. As you went to repeat the motion, Ashe’s hands went to your hips and he moved his hips up to meet yours as you came down again. You couldn’t help a stuttered breath or an occasional moan at the spikes in the new feelings you were experiencing, but Ashe was an entirely different story, his cries and groans piercing the air. You finally felt like you were getting close to whatever this feeling that was building was as Ashe’s gentle hands on your hips held you down to halt your movement. Ashe’s bangs were matted to his forehead with sweat, and his face was flushed and looked somewhat distracted by the feeling he was being hit with by your joined movements.

“Do you mind if we… switch?” he asked shyly.

You knew immediately that he meant switching places, which you had no issue with. Just as he trusted you to take control, you had immeasurable trust for the silver-haired boy that had captured your heart. You got off of him, smoothly moving to lay down just as got up to allow you space.

“I never imagined it could feel this good to be like this with someone I truly love,” Ashe admitted as you both positioned yourselves to continue, your legs spread wide in front of him as you nodded your agreement.

“You’re so beautiful, so kind… I almost can’t believe I’m going to be your husband,” he said, in the sincere tone he’s always used; he could never tell a lie and both of you knew it. You wanted to say those words back to him, tell him how precious he was to you, but then he was pushing back inside you and you lost confidence in your ability to form a coherent sentence.

He started his pace out slow, leaning down with his palms placed on either side of your head so he could lean down and kiss you. You didn’t want him to bear all of the burden, so you wrapped one leg around his waist, and the minute change in angle it allowed had you rushing your other leg around him as well. You tried to press light kisses to his neck when he pulled back from you slightly, but were overcome when Ashe began to go faster, the unhurried pace no longer good enough for either of you.

You could immediately tell what a difference it made as you felt like you were much closer already, and you could do little more than grasp the bedsheets with both hands as you moaned lightly. Ashe’s groans were so loud that if this was a normal night and everyone was not gathered at the ball, you would likely have to answer many uncomfortable questions in the morning. But in this moment, his clear enjoyment and all the noises he was making, getting more desperate-sounding by the moment just made you feel impossibly warm as you both came undone.

As you were feeling like you were almost there, Ashe began to moan your name with a frequency that increased as he leaned down to bury his face in your neck as his cries lowered to a whisper and he focused on pounding into you as fast and hard as he could. It was getting to be too much for you, and your hands moved to his back, clawing desperately for purchase as your pleasure felt like it had reached its uppermost limit and you cried out his name, breaking through his whispers and the muted squeaks of the bedframe. Ashe continued his movement for what you estimated to be maybe a minute more, his thrusts sending smaller sparks of duller pleasure through you, until he finally stilled, kissing you desperately as you felt a pulsing from within you.

A few seconds later, he finally pulled back from you, moving to lay on his side next to you as you turned yourself to face him. He wrapped an arm around you, unwilling to disengage himself physically from you, and you wondered if this was because he was still afraid that you would leave him again, even after you had agreed to marry him, and had just consummated your relationship physically. But you had hurt him so deeply, and his wounds would require more time to fully heal, and you intended to make it up to him by staying together for the rest of the time you both had together in this world.

“I won’t leave you ever again,” you said suddenly, surprising yourself too as the words practically burst from your mouth.

Ashe smiled happily, a smile that you knew you had taken away from him for so long, and you almost felt stung by the genuine faith he had in you.

“I know you won’t,” Ashe replied. “I won’t worry about that anymore.”

You smiled at each other and he blushed slightly. “It’s just very new to me that now I can kiss you whenever I want. This almost feels like a dream.”

You realized immediately that you had heard something similar before. You recalled a day when you had been walking by the greenhouse and overheard a certain red-haired former student talking to a female student by the dorms, and had quickly decided to get to your destination another way.

“Sylvain…” you muttered lowly with a frown, and now the pink on his face spread all the way to the tips of his ears.

“I’m sorry!” Ashe sputtered. “I… he told me that I should say that to a woman I truly love. I did mean every word of it, but I didn’t know that he had said it around you. I knew I shouldn’t have-”

His flustered words just made you giggle; coming from Sylvain himself you would be unhappy, but those words coming from Ashe warmed your heart, and you figured he wouldn’t stop babbling unless you stopped him yourself, so you kissed him until he relaxed and gave in. You knew that Annette and Mercedes would notice the rings on your fingers tomorrow, but for now you were happy to hide away from prying eyes with the boy you had every intention of keeping with you forever.

#readerinsert #xreader #fire emblem #fire emblem 3h #fire emblem three houses #asheleth #ashe x reader #fe3h x reader #fire emblem three houses x reader #smut

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fiction-box · 2 years

Note

Okay, so I just saw the one about the wyvern and I loved it!!!

Hear me out: can you write for the same reader and Claude but she actually does fall? It can be after the time skip when she falls, and then Claude remembers their conversation about it from when they were at the academy together?

I'm not too good at context, so I'll leave exactly how it happens up to you!

I felt quite inspired by this prompt, so you got to jump the queue this week, my lovely. It makes me so happy to see that people are getting their inspiration from others on this blog!

Even just regarding the ask itself, there was so much I could have done with this. There were quite a few areas I wanted to explore, so I decided to do a bit of perspective switching, this fic.

Thanks for sharing, and thank you also for supporting both your own ideas and those of others on this blog! Requests are open!

The story will be continued under the cut.

His mind flooded with nostalgia as he led you, Lysithea, and Lorenz on a charge into the Red Canyon.

What had it been, five years since you all were last here? He and the Golden Deer, reunited once more under the orders of their old teacher. Claude wasn’t exactly sure what their goal was this time, but the demonic beasts in the area told him enough about what needed to happen next.

You four had been assigned to clear the canyon of the monsters Edelgard (now the Emperor of Adrestia) let loose. Once the job was completed, Byleth was to be notified and further instructions were to be given.

The original roster, however, had been modified. It was meant to be you, Ignatz, Raphael, and Lysithea. Plans changed when a stray imperial troop found the monastery, catching Raphael, who was out collecting wood, off guard. Luckily, Leonie was able to hear the ruckus and brought the professor in time to prevent him from getting into any further trouble.

With skilled healers like Marianne and Lysithea around, the injuries weren’t anything to fret over. Since he was brought back and treated quickly, the blond brawler turned out fine. Their main issue was how far back on supplies that put the army. Raphael and Leonie were the only ones capable of gathering any decent amount of firewood, so the professor insisted they stay behind.

That left Lorenz, Ignatz, Marianne, Claude, and Hilda. Marianne qualified for a position as their best healer, so it was definitely a safer bet to keep her at the monastery in case anything went awry. Naturally, Hilda didn’t want to do any work, so Teach sent Lorenz and himself on the Red Canyon mission while Ignatz received a list of items to find in the marketplace. Something about not risking the death or capture of their noble figureheads by imperial ambush.

Nice to know she cared, in her own way.

Not that it mattered to Claude, anyway. The better he could watch over you, the more reassured he would feel. He wasn’t the biggest fan of you heading anywhere too far from him in the hellscape Fodlan had become. Sure, he knew you could handle yourself…

Claude just didn’t know how he would handle himself if anything really did happen to you.

Upon the group’s arrival, the leader of the Golden Deer insisted on doing a small reconnaissance check. He flew up into the clouds, looking across the canyon to spot a bird and a crest beast of notable size. Not bad, but it wasn’t going to be quick, either.

“Alright, it doesn’t look like much. The four of us should do just fine,” he declared.

Lorenz craned his neck to glare at him, “It would be far more helpful if you could actually inform us of our opponents.”

“Yeah,” Lysithea shouted, “how are we meant to form a plan if you keep fooling around up there?”

“Quiet down and be patient, will you? You’ll attract their attention,” Claude hushed. “There are only two. One of them is a bird, which I’m pretty sure I can handle myself.”

“And the other?” you pressed.

“We’re not dealing with a lightweight, I can tell you that much.”

He watched as the three of you looked to the bridge you were meant to approach. Sitting peacefully on it was a crest beast of a slightly larger size than the one you faced here half a decade ago.

“Listen up! Here’s what we’re going to do. Lorenz, you’ll ride onto the bridge and attract its attention. Veer to one side to get it to move towards you.”

“Let me guess,” you started, “you want me on its other side?”

Claude nodded, “Yep. Lysithea, you stay near the entrance of the bridge. It should be wide enough to fit both of the others if you three can keep diverting its attention by varying the timing of your attacks.”

He waited a moment for any objections or complaints. Hearing none, he began to fly towards the canyon mouth.

“Lorenz, make sure you wait until after I attract the other one’s attention. This won’t work if it notices you guys, first.”

Flying out of earshot before Lorenz could retort, the Almyran Prince moved steadily towards his target. It was a careful process, though; he couldn’t risk garnering the attention of the other beast.

“Hey!” he shouted. “I’m pretty sure you’re not supposed to be here! Now's your chance to leave before things get ugly!”

The avian monster roared at him in response, flapping its wings faster in aggression.

“Suit yourself.”

His task would have been easier if his friends could help, but he knew you needed all the help you could get to fight the creature on that bridge. Honestly, even with three people, you all were still liable to struggle more than he did.

As more and more arrows lodged themselves into his opponent, Claude maneuvered in a way that allowed him to check on your progress. His plan was going flawlessly, it seemed. You were on the side of the bridge closest to him, with Lorenz on the far side of the beast and Lysithea attacking from the bridge’s mouth.

But observing wasn’t helping anyone. It was time to get in there and do some damage, himself.

Claude shifted his gaze from just past the bird to its left wing. There were enough arrows in it already that he knew a clean shot would prevent it from flapping properly. Then, the only thing left would be to watch it descend into the abyss of the canyon.

“Let’s finish this!”

Easily, he nocked an arrow onto his bow and pulled the string taut. The release sent it flying into the bird’s arm, giving him the result he was looking for.

Well…not quite.

Perhaps he should have paid a bit more attention to where he was positioned.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Claude's plan was working much more effectively than you originally thought it would. The best part was how cooperative everyone was about it. You had never seen Lorenz and Lysithea so focused outside of battle.

Anytime someone would attack, the others would take it upon themselves to shout as loudly as possible. The behemoth became so confused that it could hardly decide on who to fight, let alone who to defend from.

Lysithea’s placement was more fortunate than you had originally realized, what with her blocking off the only visible exit. In the heat of the moment, it seemed your attacker had forgotten about the escape route directly behind it.

Out of sight, out of mind, you supposed.

Once the mage had taken her turn, it was Lorenz’s time to take a stab. The crest beast moved away from you, approaching the violet noble only to freeze at Lysithea’s loud shouts.

But as something slammed into the bridge not two feet away from you, you couldn’t help but omit a scream of your own. Its impact shook the bridge, and you lost your footing.

“AH- WHAT-?!”

Only when you had fallen to your knees did you look to the side, watching as the bird that had fallen next to you was shot in the eye. It was dead now; Claude had done his part.

Lorenz and Lysithea called out your name in concern, and the attention placed onto you seemed to intrigue the beast the three of you were fighting.

You could have sworn Lorenz had shouted some insult toward Claude (something about being careless?) but you didn’t hear. There were more important things you needed to process at the moment. However, your biggest concern was not the crest beast making its way toward you, though you suddenly wished it was.

No, you were more focused on the cracks beginning to form around your knees on the bridge.

It seemed that architecture built thousands of years ago was not built to withstand such a hit. All you wanted was to get off the unstable structure, but each time you tried to get up or move, you could feel the fissures spread.

“Get off the bridge! RIGHT NOW!” you shouted, desperate to at least save your friends, “QUICKLY!”

They followed your orders without much thought, and you were certain it was only thanks to their position that they made it anywhere in time. Lorenz was on a horse and traveled faster while Lysithea was mere steps away from solid ground.

You had no such hope, though. Not with the demonic beast making matters worse with each step in your direction.

What were you meant to do? Shout at it in hopes to confuse or scare it? That would be ridiculous; you weren’t even a tenth of the size of that thing!

Unfortunately, the only thing your voice did was grow smaller. You pleaded with it, knowing well that it was fruitless. The monster couldn’t understand you, and it didn’t know enough to save its own life, either.

You were effectively trapped. If it attacked or came too close, you would fall. Any attempts to escape it by moving on the crumbling bridge would condemn you to the same fate.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ever since you yelled at the other Golden Deer, Claude had been paying close attention to your predicament.

The wyvern rider had been trying to come up with some solution to get you out of there, but not all roads lead to Garreg Mach, apparently. Distracting the beast wasn’t an option since he figured out you were on unstable ground (a story told by the fact you weren’t running away). Not only would any approach on his part rile the beast, but he’d inevitably be too far away to help you if something went wrong.

He knew he had no chance of swooping in to pick you up, either. The monster would probably panic if he saw another beast and a rider. It wasn’t as though he could land to let you mount safely, either.

Stress and fear were overtaking his ability to think straight. Claude had no plan, and the worst part was that he knew he was the cause of all this. The best he could think of was to wait for you to fall from a safe distance away, then diving in for the save.

But then he remembered. A conversation from many years ago stored in the back of his mind.

“I can’t. I can’t do it.”

“I’m not afraid of heights, I’m afraid of falling.”

Instantly, he hated himself for it. He knew he was out of time and he hated himself for it. What sort of leader, what kind of friend, would just sit back and watch as someone that would call him such titles faced their greatest fear? A fear that was confessed to him several years ago and likely had not changed, for that matter?

He watched anyway, though. It was all he could do as the beast approached you, damning you with every step.

When his eyes turned to you, though, he knew you hadn’t gotten over your fear. You knew what would come next, and the signs of panic and fear without acceptance were setting into your form.

Your own eyes were looking all around, taking in the beast in front of you, the cracks on the bridge, the end of the bridge that you had no chance of escaping to…

As the wretched thing came ever closer, Claude leaned forward on his wyvern, placing a hand on its neck to warn it of his incoming command.

A claw was raised, and once it came down, you dodged forward past it.

The bridge began to collapse at the impact of the missed attack, bringing the beast down with it.

Not you, though. Not yet. He flew closer with his wyvern as fast as he could as you fought for your life against the collapsing structure, running as fast as you could muster.

But it was clear that your plates were weighing you down, and when you lost your footing and joined the descending rubble, he dove in hopes of saving you.

Your scream would find its way into his nightmares for a long time after.

The catch wasn’t pretty; Claude had to practically slam into you at an angle to safely slow your momentum.

Once he could get enough air back to his lungs to process his surroundings, he registered your arms clinging to him for dear life. Your breaths were coming at a rapid pace, but the Duke of Riegan couldn’t have been more thankful for it.

“I’m so sorry,” Claude managed. He needed you to know; he would never forgive himself if you didn’t. “I’ve got you, now. I promise I will never let you fall again.”

You were alive. You were safe.

You were crying.

“Ah-” for once, he had no idea what to say. He had made a similar promise five years ago, hadn’t he? So really, what were his words worth?

He settled for using his actions, instead. Claude wrapped his arm around you, placing his free hand on your head and holding you to his chest.

It only lasted for a moment, though. That’s all he allowed himself before he returned his arm to where it was, both of you flying high enough to get over the cliff.

The two of you landed, Lorenz abandoning his horse and Lysithea running to you while you both practically fell off the wyvern. Claude felt you let go of him and roll over, attracting his notice as he watched you cough up blood onto the ground.

Apparently, the impact between you two that had stopped your momentum induced its own form of shock into himself. He barely felt Lorenz when the knight practically pulled him off you. Lysithea needed space in order to heal you properly, after all.

She laid you down flat on your back, hovering her hands over different areas but focusing mostly on your upper body.

Your chest and your head. You really were lucky, then.

Once her overall evaluation was done and a bit of magic was used, she announced, “Her body seems fine at a surface level, but I promise she’s much worse than you think. It’s a miracle she's still able to move properly!”

Lorenz released him as Claude regained control of his own body, getting up and moving ever so slightly closer to check on you “Can you hear us alright? How do you feel?”

You coughed once more after you incoherently moved to sit up, “...I…what? This isn’t…”

Claude thought back on the past events in a panic, “Hey, you didn’t actually hit your head, right?”

“No…no…it’s fine,” that wasn’t quite what he wanted to hear. “I just…I think I need a moment.”

As it turned out, a moment was all it took for your form to go limp.

Lysithea rushed forward, checking your pulse and the area in front of your nose and mouth, “She- she’s passed out.”

“Well then,” Lorenz thought, “I believe our next best option would be to head back to the monastery. It would do no good to remain out here.”

The mage knelt beside you, “Can you stand guard for a moment, first? I want to make sure she’s stable before we head back.”

After her quick once-over on you (and on him, as per her insistence), the group finally seemed ready to head back. To return as soon as possible, Lysithea rode on the back of Lorenz’s horse as Claude made sure to secure you in front of him on his wyvern. Altogether, the four of you headed back to Garreg Mach in hopes of getting you some proper rest.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You couldn’t scream.

You were falling, the rubble of stone far older than your family name joining your descent.

It was terrifying. There was nothing you could do. All that was left for you was to wait for the end. For the surface of whatever waited at the bottom of the canyon.

Maybe you couldn’t scream because, deep down, you knew no one would save you.

Only, you swore you remembered screaming. Your throat hurt.

…hurt…? You didn’t feel anything.

While your thoughts were busy muddling together, you only grew more restless and confused.

It was only when you felt something slam into your chest that you awoke in a panic.

“H-help! I’m falling! I…I don’t-” you panted, your eyes scanning your surroundings for anything that made sense-

“Easy there. You’re alright,” a familiar voice called to you.

Slowly, your body allowed itself to take everything in. This was the old medical ward in the monastery. You were on one of the beds, and from what you could see, you were the only one in the room.

“...what…?” you suddenly felt dizzy, even more disoriented than before.

Arms from behind you coaxed you back down onto the bed. On your way down, you caught a glimpse of a face to which you couldn’t match a name.

“Seriously?” he must have noticed you didn’t recognize him. Or maybe it was the confusion in your blank expression. “After everything you put me through, you’re gonna act like you don’t remember me?”

Act? Was this his idea of a prank?

You watched as his green eyes lost their playful glint, a look of concern slipping into place.

“Hey, come on. You do remember me, right?”

“I know you, but I don’t…” you hesitated, not quite sure how to put it, “...your name…”

“I’d go get Lysithea, but I don’t like the idea of leaving you alone in this state.”

“Lysithea…” some distant parts of your memory resurfaced at the name. “She was with me on the bridge. It was her, me, Lorenz, and…you.”

He nodded, “I still can’t believe you remember Lorenz and not me. Not that it’s any easier to believe how he and I got assigned to help you, in the first place.”

Was this…a test? No matter, you didn’t think your memories from before the incident were tainted.

Well, not that much, anyway. You felt like you would remember a bit more about the person you were talking to if you could recall everything from before.

“Yeah, thank goodness Professor chose the two of you to join us after Raphael got hurt. I don’t think anyone without a horse would have gotten out from the middle of the bridge in time.”

Your friend(?) gave a dry laugh at that, “I suppose it was lucky, in some twisted way. I doubt I could have saved you both.”

“I think your reckless actions were the reason we found ourselves in such a mess.”

“Ouch! Even when you’ve forgotten all about me, you still know how to lecture me.”

“For lack of better term, I remember you ‘fundamentally’. It’s just your name that eludes me.”

He raised a brow in challenge, “Oh yeah? Prove it, then. What am I like?”

A different kind of test, you thought. That was fine, you supposed. It wouldn’t hurt him to know what a friend thought of him.

You just hoped saying these things wouldn’t hurt your future self.

“Well, you aren’t the most loyal, nor are you always honest. At least, not from what I remember seeing of you. Sometimes, you don’t think things through all the way, despite the fact you call yourself a schemer. It’s as though…you’re too busy living in the present to ever truly learn from your past, I think. You become too blinded by the good you might do to see the harm behind your actions.”

You noticed he didn’t really have anything to say to that. Did you mess up?

His expression changed, and he gave what you classified as a “knowing smirk”, but some part of you felt certain he wasn’t as pleasantly amused as he pretended to be.

“Can you give me some examples?”

Enough with the tests, you thought. Haven’t I shown that I know enough?

“Just now, with the bird. I’m certain you thought you were doing a good thing by killing it and rushing over to help us, but you didn’t think it through. You could have positioned yourself better, or you could have trusted us to keep it at bay long enough for you to do your own job properly.”

“That’s why I have you though, right? You’re here to let me know when I mess up, and how to make everything that much better in the initial stages of planning.”

The sheets you were lying on suddenly fascinated you as you twisted them between your fingers, “No, you don’t really need me for those kinds of things. Honestly, I’m certain you could do all those things yourself if you just applied everything a little better. You’re charismatic and cunning; you have no problems recruiting others and getting them to follow you.”

A small laugh left you at that, “It’s easy for people to want to stay when you’re so good at what you do. You’ve succeeded far more than you’ve failed, and that was even before you let me in to help you.”

“Oh? And can you give me some examples of that?”

Now your laughter fell from your lips in a larger amount as you swatted at him, looking up from the sheet, “I can’t stroke your ego too much, Claude! You’d never let me hear the end of it!”

“So you do remember my name!” he teased. “Honestly, you hurt me a little, there. There’s pulling a prank, and then there’s being just plain mean.”

You supposed you did recall, now. It was strange how many memories and emotions were attached to a name, and how much forgetting one could affect you and those around you.

Your expression turned somber as you began to realize the gravity of your previous situation. You could have died, or you could have forgotten everyone you loved. Even just failing to remember Claude was a horrible thought.

“I never meant to forget you. I would apologize, but looking back, I don’t know what I would be apologizing for. That whole time on the bridge…I just did what I thought was right.”

“That’s because it was my fault, as much as I hate admitting it. I should have been more aware of my surroundings. I got the three of you into quite a bit of trouble.” he grimaced ever so minutely, you almost thought you imagined it. Before you could think too hard on it, he continued, “If things went any worse, I probably could have handed my head to the emperor, myself.”

“Well, as much as she might appreciate the thought, I’m not prepared to let you give up, yet,” you smiled.

“Sure,” Claude grinned as he stood, likely to go fetch Lysithea, “but don’t you dare think I’m planning on it. Once you recover, you can help me work toward making sure nothing like this ever happens again.”

You gave a curt nod at that, and Claude waited a moment longer before finally leaving you alone.

It seemed your greatest lessons were learned at the worst times, but with him at your side, you were sure you could manage to stay one step ahead of misfortune. It was better to be taught by crest beasts than by the Emperor or her advisors, you supposed.

So as you shut your eyes on your pillow in the empty room, you assured yourself there wouldn’t be a next time. Lysithea could heal the bruises, but she couldn’t take away the experience and what you gained from it.

That mistake was just another shadow to be eliminated before the new dawn could come. You had no doubt you would get there, but first, you needed to end this war.

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