#i know two of these are just jyn on ferrix but look | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

buckybarnesss · 1 year

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BixCassian has so much more history and chemistry than JynCassian would ever have even if they lived. It’s not about “ship wars” as some of you people say, is about seeing the obvious that many of you just choose to ignore. You can’t compare his first love, the girl that has known him for all his life, the one that he sneaked in the late night to see when they were young, the one that knows all his secrets and the one that he loved with all his heart with some girl he knew for a day or two and never showed any sign of affection to him. JynCassian shippers need to deal with this fact

i could ignore this but i'm just petty enough not to. you came into my ask box after all and i'm assuming you've been the one sending this kind of nonsense to other rebelcaptain shippers as well.

you want attention. you want us to get baited and be all oh my god i never saw it that way you are so right anon. you want a little ship war.

you are expecting a level of care about other other people's shipping preferences i just don't have.

i have tumblr savior and i know how to close a tab. anon, you know why i have tumblr savior and the good sense cultivated multiple decades on the internet?

i was there gandolf. i was there 3000 years ago in the trenches of harmony versus the good ship you will never be on that level.

but you should look into using tools to cultivate your online experience rather than leaving anon messages trying to bait people.

anyway

it's funny you say shit like this because bix caleen was created for andor she did not exist as a concept for rogue one. so i don't know what you want me to do about that? is this something that you, perhaps are mad about? that jyn erso existed first and the narrative of rogue one positions cassian and jyn as mirrors and foils to each other? that there's a lot of parallels and soulmatism surrounding jyn and cassian's relationship? and your preferred ship exists in canon as exes?

anon, what i really think is that you have a narrow idea of love and a romanization of first loves.

i think bix and cassian as first loves is sweet and the care they have for each other remains but lol that relationship is a hot mess and unsustainable.

they are exes for a reason and it's because bix values herself as a person and not only expects better from cassian but deserves better from him. the cassian we meet on ferrix is a hot mess and is so emotionally unavailable he might as well be located in another sector.

i'm not even gonna address how you think cassian had no affection for jyn because lol home boy is straight up obsessed with her from the jump. also cassian and jyn wanted to fuck realllllllll bad. sorry.

#anon #my blog

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laz-laz-ace-pilot · 1 year

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I posted 54,649 times in 2022

That's 33,170 more posts than 2021!

295 posts created (1%)

54,354 posts reblogged (99%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@cantwearflipflops

@pinkys-plan

@sulevinen

@spacerocksarethebestrocks

@screaming-velociraptor

I tagged 4,941 of my posts in 2022

#andor spoilers - 1,089 posts

#andor - 969 posts

#tbobf spoilers - 228 posts

#writing reference - 136 posts

#reference - 107 posts

#kenobi spoilers - 95 posts

#personal - 76 posts

#in the shadow of his brothers - 67 posts

#star wars - 60 posts

#drawing reference - 57 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#this has been followed by tory and rwandan propoganda. ‘we have no human rights violations. people are safe here’ no the fuck they aren’t??

My Top Posts in 2022:

I'm sorry to every other action movie star, but you will never be as cool or sexy as Diego Luna dive jumping and shooting a Deathtrooper fascist while in that jacket. It's over, go congratulate Mr Luna on the way out.

674 notes - Posted November 24, 2022

Some Imperial somewhere: you're never going to believe who just organised a massive prison break

768 notes - Posted November 9, 2022

There are so many details in Andor that I could pour over forever, especially in the prison. The language used is so corporate and sanitised - 'minimally invasive enforcement techniques' to describe electrocuting someone to death, 'on programme/ off programme', 'hot floor' - all of it defangs the reality of what they're living with for the oppressors (and maybe for the inmates to increase productivity?) but must drive the inmates mad.

There's tiny moments too; the fact they showed one guard being late due to a 'problem in tech', establishing that the idea that its a well oiled machine is just a thin veneer. The desperation of the inmates to hear news about themselves from outside and getting nothing. The use of what looks like sign language to communicate across blocks. The comment about if two inmates are in the same cell they both get fried - that could be read as just to stop inmates conspiring together, but also implies that inmates can't seek romantic, sexual or even friendly companionship. There's a homophobic edge to it, and further reinstates the prisons control over happiness. Pleasure can only be achieved through productivity for the Empire, everything else is forbidden.

And that doesn't even go into the set design, the costumes, the filming, the acting! Or how those scenes are juxtaposed against the luxury of Mon Mothma's apartment.

This show guys!

1,023 notes - Posted October 27, 2022

I know people are seeing the post credit scene and lamenting that Cassian and Melshi were forced to build the very weapon that will kill them (which is true and I am definitely also 'people') but... it also confirmation that the prison escape directly impacted the development of the Death Star.

Like, we know that turning off the facility meant that Narkina 5 couldn't be fully operational for months, and the loss of 5000 prisoners who were all assembling large numbers of pieces a day... all of that had to hurt the production schedule, not to mention any further damage from Melshi or Cassian's testimonies reaching people inside and out of the prison system.

How long did it delay production? We don't know - it could have been weeks or months, or even just hours. But knowing how little time the Rebellion has once they learn of the Death Star's existence, and how the Empire was closing in, even before then - Jyn and team escape Jedha with the message and means to destroy the superweapon by literal seconds - I just feel like it counted.

The Death Star will one day kill both Cassian and Melshi, but they, and 5000 other men, also bought precious time for the Rebellion. Just enough time to get the plans off Scarif. Just enough time for some desert farmer boy to make the crucial shot.

2,580 notes - Posted November 24, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

ISB and Luthen playing 4D chess against each other:

Ferrix:

3,009 notes - Posted November 23, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #andor #andor spoilers

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godslayingenthusiast · 11 months

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I am Extremely Normal about Andor, apologies in advance for the fandom post.

One of the things that really struck me with this one was how they used gender. Remember, those of us who grew up with the original trilogy, Leia wasn’t just the best girl, she was practically the only girl. We joked about it. You had Aunt Beru, the sisters at the Cantina, one woman at the Hoth base, a couple background women in Cloud City, Oola, the fat dancer, and Sy Snoodles. And Mon Mothma, the only other woman with a speaking part. And that’s it for three movies! The galaxy is overwhelmingly, distractingly, male. So I kept finding myself looking at Ferrix and Aldhani and Coruscant and just constantly being amazed at how many women there are. Foreground women, background women, an old woman! Hookers, antiques dealers, scrappers, organizers, a child! A surly teenage girl child! The governor’s wife! It’s right and correct and I’m glad they did it but also it was distracting because I’d been conditioned to expect so much less.

And then we get to prison.

Narkina 5 has 5,000 men, plus the 70 or so imperials guarding them and running the place. All men. All human men. It looks like, well, what we used to expect. And with that jarring transition you start to piece together more things. How Dedra fights tooth and nail to be one of only two women in that boardroom, how when she is not in the building they disregard her strong and correct opinions. How Cyril has the fucking audacity to grab her on the street. The empire has incredibly toxic views on gender, as well as human supremacy. And it’s reflected in who they choose for the important labor camps, instead of the mines (remember where we’re gonna find Jyn in just a couple years). It’s baked into everything.

But there’s more to pull back, because if it’s just the empire then why is the rebellion also overwhelmingly male by the time of the battle of Yavin? Yes, I know, 1977, but in universe we finally can start to see an answer forming. When we fight monsters, we come to reflect them, oftentimes without realizing it. Fascism uses people and discards them, fascism sells people on being heroes to extract their labor, and WE SEE LUTHEN DO IT TOO. He even says it out loud! “I use the tools of my enemies to defeat them”!!! There are key deaths that take women (and people of color) out of the fight before Yavin, but there is also the thread of becoming that which you hate, a toxic mirror. And I love that because of the way things play out, it shows that sometimes you gotta stare in the abyss anyway. Sometimes losing your humanity for the sake of someone else’s is worth it. And sometimes that damage has knock on effects for generations. And every one of those eggs you broke mattered.

Idk I gotta go do things but I’ve just been gnawing on this too long to keep it to myself. There’s so much to unpack with this show

#andor #fandom posting #ugh feelings #seriously I have so many thoughts about Revolution and what it does to people #beau willimon doesn’t get enough credit

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invaderhogtwopointohno · 11 months

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Target Eadu

Based on this prompt by @aoneko-lee

Also find on Ao3 here

Chapter Two

It had been so long since he had dreamed of Ferrix.

When he was younger, he would dream of his original home- the trees, his friends, his sister. But his mother had discouraged him from thinking about such things- better to focus on his home on Ferrix. When he first was brought there, he had been so scared. He didn't know the language and while his parents had been kind to him- he was an outsider for a long time.

The first time his father ever took him to watch a Daughter of Ferrix funeral and he heard the songs and watched the brick be laid- that was the first time he ever felt a part of them.

His dream was of his father's brick. He had been stuck in prison after his fight with the Stormtroopers and he had missed it. His mother never said it, but he knew she was disappointed in him.

He stood in front of the wall where his father's brick was laid and he touched the stone- wishing he could see him one more time.

Cassian opened his eyes and he was still on Eadu, he was still being rained on and he was still lying next to Jyn. She had been stubborn and originally refused to sleep, but it was clear that she needed it and had managed to fall asleep sometime during the night.

The rain was still pouring down in buckets and the sun was not out- there was hardly any light. They were safely tucked in the tree line, but they were going to have to move soon. He dared not even think to wake up Jyn, she still had her blaster in her hand, she might shoot him if he disturbed her.

So he waited, listening to the rain and looking at her.

Her face was a little pale but the rain constantly coming down was probably the reason for that. She had put her poncho over her like a blanket and looked like a small angry child sleeping with her eyebrows knitted together.

In the silence of the moment, he realized that Jyn had lost two fathers in only a short period of time.

She had said herself that Saw Guerrea had raised her, he had been like a father to her. And her father, Galen Erso, had only just been reunited with her as he lay dying at the lab just the day before. He thought back to the moment he had learned his own mother was lost to him forever. The things he had never been able to say. The thousands of words he had wished he had been able to speak to her. He knew deep down that she was proud of the work he had done for the Rebellion, but there were dark moments like this when he wondered if he was actually making her sad for him.

"Did you sleep?"

The voice startled him and he blinked, realizing that he had gone inside of himself for a moment and not realized that Jyn had opened her eyes.

"A little..."

He doubted she was concerned for him.

"We need to find a ship," she said shortly, getting up taking off the hat that she had been wearing, tucking her blaster back underneath her poncho. He followed suit, looking around the dark terrain. The rain drowned out most of the noise around them so it was unclear if the lab was still on fire or if there were any tie fighters in the area. They were going to need to be cautious.

"Bodhi said that there was a shuttle depot back where the lab was," Cassian said, looking back from where they'd come. It would be a waste of their time to go backwards. "But I didn't see an extensive Imperial post there."

"The base is probably further down the ridge," she said, looking in the opposite direction from where they'd come from. The fighter from the night before had come from that direction. "The lab was probably built separately."

Kyber crystals being refined probably was toxic, so it was better to have a lab separate from the rest of the outpost. They could easily find a ship if they made their way down to the base. It was going to be difficult, but if Jyn had decided not to shoot him in his sleep, Cassian was going to remain optimistic.

They set out down the ridge, the rain letting up only a little along the way. They walked for half a day before they were finally clear of the trees and the rocks, revealing that the path led down to a large lake with a massive base sitting in the middle of it, a long path across the water leading to it. They were going to have to go inside if they were going to secure a ship, it looked like the ships were coming and going from the heart of it.

They took refuge behind some rocks, Cassian pulling out his binoculars to check everything out. He had lost his weapon but managed to hold onto those.

"Looks like it's one way in, one way out, and with the fireworks from last night, it's going to be extra security."

She took the binoculars and looked herself, making a face.

"Any ideas?" she asked coldly. He looked around. There was a village that was some distance from the water, probably a local place that had been there before the Empire built their fortress. They could swipe uniforms from officers down there. He looked at her.

"The village. We get some uniforms, go inside," he said simply.

"Easier said than done," she muttered. She looked around and saw that there was a rock formation with a cave entrance.

"We can go in there while we plan," she said and stood up, heading towards it without an invitation to him. He sighed and followed. The rain started to let up a little, breaking for a while, but the sun did not penetrate the clouds, and the cave was quite dark. She started a fire, a small one and started to take off her clothes. They needed to get their clothes dried out at least a little bit. She pulled off her hat and hit it against her leg.

"This place is interesting," he muttered, taking off his own coat and putting his hands close to the small fire. It had been a long time since she had been on a battlefield, but this reminded her of the days and nights she would be in a trench among Saw's rebels.

At the time, she did not understand that the universe was bigger than just the battlefield. She had been so lost when he had abandoned her. She was sixteen, trying to find her way. She had no idea how to find fellow rebels, so she forged her own path. But now she had a true mission, a true purpose again. The Force had finally shown her the path that she was destined for.

Cassian took off his jacket, hanging it over a rock, looking at the fire. They were pretty tucked away back here, so they doubted anyone would see the light. She looked across the fire from him.

"Do you think that they made it to the rebels safely?"

He looked up from his hands at her. She had taken off her poncho and was wringing out her hair to try and get the excess water off of her.

"K-2 is good at navigating, he'll get them there. And Bodhi is a pilot, he's got it covered."

He wanted to say something. Anything else. Sorry for her father? Sorry for the mess that they were in right now? Sorry that he had ever dragged her into his mission to find her father and then ended up just using her and making her lose the one person in the universe she couldn't live without? His thoughts were running away with him that he hadn't realized she had spoken.

"What?" he asked, looking up at her.

"I asked you... where are you from?"

It was out of left field, that was for sure. She had sat back against a rock, getting comfortable. This was a scene that had played out many times in her long career as a soldier- you get stuck with someone, even if you don't like them- you have to do something and talking usually was it. She didn't particularly enjoy it, but it was something to do and she needed to distract herself. She had already decided what her mission was- nothing was going to stand in her way, not even Cassian. But she might as well find something that won't cause her to think about her father alone on that platform.

"Fest."

Ferrix. He was supposed to say Fest every time someone asked him where he was from- that's what his mother had always told him. The lie was so easy to say that he almost forgot that he didn't need to say it anymore. He had not even mentioned that he was originally from Kenari even to Luthen when he recruited him. That was a secret his mother took to her grave for him.

"I was born on Fest- I was raised on Ferrix," he said and she titled her head a little, squinting at him.

"Family?" she asked, and he shrugged.

"Gone. My father when I was thirteen. My mother... a few years ago..."

He looked away from her wondering eyes.

"I haven't been back since- too busy with my work."

"Rebel Intelligence," she said in a mocking tone that he did not miss. At least she wasn't pointing the blaster at him anymore. "How long have you worked for the Rebellion?"

"Rebellion? A few years... fighting the Empire...?"

He trailed off. His entire life, basically. He turned and looked at her.

"And you?"

"Vallt," she replied, the tiny planet she had been born on was not her home. She had never really lived anywhere honestly. "But I was raised on Coursaunt."

He looked surprised. She chuckled a little.

"My father was a brilliant scientist, taken in by the Empire in the early days. Once he realized what they were doing, he defected. We lived on a small farm for a while... but then... we were found."

"You said Saw saved you?"

"He was friends with my father- he tried to recruit him to join the Rebellion. After my mother was murdered, I went into hiding and joined Saw's rebels. I had no idea where my father was until you told me."

And then this whole nightmare had taken place.

"How did you know where to find me?" she asked, squinting at him. Wobani wasn't exactly a small place, finding her had to have been difficult, especially since she used a lot of different names.

"We were thinking about recruiting you a few times to work for us," he said, folding his hands in front of him, "But it never seemed viable."

"Why?" she asked and he shrugged.

"Until I met you I thought it was because you were just another soldier- but now I see it. There's no way the Rebellion could give you orders."

She didn't smile but he saw a little light dancing in her eyes. Since he had met her, Cassian was fully aware that Jyn was not someone to be messed with and it was clear that she didn't take direction well. He had read in her file that she had been in Saw's group since she was a child, she must have been difficult to be told what to do even then.

"Why did you join? The Rebellion?"

What should he say? That he had been brought in by Luthen? That he had been a rebel since childhood? That he had never really known peace? He looked across the fire at her and shrugged.

"I've been in this fight since I was six years old... I don't know anything else." Silence fell between them and he wondered if that was the right thing to say. She looked away from him and towards the cave.

"My mother was shot- right in front of me. I spent days sitting alone inside a cave just like this- thinking about how it had been all my fault. When I had heard rumors that my father was still alive even before I left Saw, I had been so angry that he had been the one to live and not my mother."

He said nothing.

"I... I was so convinced that he had abandoned me.... that he... he had never wanted me in the first place..."

She looked down and wiped a tear that was threatening to fall. He doubted she wanted to seem weak in front of him. He looked away, pretending like he hadn't noticed.

"We'll get to the plans," he said.

She looked at him, surprised by his sudden declaration.

"What do you mean?"

"You said it yourself- you wanted to go after the Death Star plans, I doubt the Alliance will do it. So we'll have to do it ourselves."

"Ourselves?" she repeated.

He looked her over. He had already known from the moment he had met her that he was never going to be able to say no to her, and this insane mission was clearly something she was going to do with or without him and he had decided that he would rather be with her.

"Whatever it takes," he said, with a kind of finality that meant he was telling the truth. He hoped that meant she no longer saw him as her enemy. He didn't say anything else and instead took the chance to get some more sleep before they were going to sneak into the village to get their uniforms.

A/N: I spent a little too much time trying to find out where everyone was born and I want to thank my lord and savior wookiepedia for helping me with that.

#cassian andor #jyn erso #rebelcaptain #star wars #rogue one #fanfic #chapter two be lots of talking around the fire trope!!!

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andorerso · 1 year

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home we’ll go

Cassian Andor only comes back to Ferrix for two things: to get Maarva and Bee, and to say goodbye to the people he cares about. Neither goes the way he expects it to.

AU for episode 7: what if Jyn had grown up on Ferrix?

Cassian has it all figured out.

This time, finally.

He knows what he’s doing, knows what he wants, knows how to get it. No more stumbling around in the dark, drifting through life aimlessly, going where the tide takes him. This money, the credits he’d earned — it’s his chance at something better. They won’t have to live in fear anymore. He won’t have to walk past Rix Road and think of Clem hanging there. Maarva won’t have to save on the heating, shivering in her thin coat. Bee won’t have to make do with his old and outdated components that leave him with so little power reserves and make him freeze up for data lag.

There’ll be no more debts and cons and thefts and favors from friends that ultimately leave him alienated from everyone. He has enough credits to pay back all the people he’s borrowed from. Perhaps that’s the only thing he can do for them; give them their money and the courtesy of his absence. Perhaps someday they will remember him as the man who kept his word after all and gave them what they were owed.

Whatever they will think of him, it’s of no consequence to him anymore. He only came back to collect the people he needed. Pay off his debts, make his goodbyes and apologies, then be on his merry way with the only family he has left.

And if Maarva doesn’t seem as excited as he’d hoped, he chalks it up to the fact that she’s a tired old woman who needs her rest. He should go see Bix anyway.

And Jyn.

He should say goodbye.

“We’ll pull out first thing in the morning,” he tells her and ignores the way her nod seems reluctant. She only calls after him when he’s at the door, hand on the control panel.

“She’s at the ship. Been spending time there recently, I hear.”

Cassian’s heart squeezes, but he doesn’t turn back.

She doesn’t have to specify who.

xxx

The things Bix says to him weigh on his mind as he makes his way to the ship he’d slept in more than he’d ever slept at home.

He hadn’t expected Bix to welcome him with open arms, but it was a blow in the face to realize how damaged their relationship has become.

People blame you. You scam, you borrow, you lie, you disappear…

Well, there it is then. That’s his legacy here on Ferrix. Nothing but trouble.

Why should I care? he asks himself, but the bitter resentment is hard to brush aside. That’s all they ever saw me as anyway.

Ferrix hadn’t been cruel to him exactly, but when push came to shove, they would rather blame him than Timm. Easier to hate the outsider than someone who’d always been one of their own, he supposes. All the more reasons for him to get off this planet and never look back. Finally close this chapter of his life for good, do something new. Anything he wants.

If not for the fact that leaving meant losing the one person in the galaxy who knows him to the bone.

Every story, every mistake, every little secret. All the bad parts of him that he never hid from anyone, and all the good parts that he didn’t always show. She’s been privy to them all.

The thought of leaving that behind cuts him in half.

And when he finally reaches the ship and walks inside, greeted with the sight of her lying in the bunk he so often slept in, he knows he’ll never find that in anyone again.

Jyn’s self-preservation instincts are just as good as his, and the noise of his entrance startles her awake. Half-conscious, she shoots up, one hand reaching for the lamp beside her, the other for her hidden knife in her boot. She brandishes it in his direction without checking to see who had interrupted her sleep, but her eyes widen when their gazes meet.

Her hand drops. Her mouth falls open.

He half expects her to greet him with anger.

Instead, he only has time to mutter a quiet “hey” before she rushes at him and wraps her arms around his shoulders.

“Cassian,” she gasps into his ear, and it’s the sweetest sound he’s ever heard. He lets his body loosen, lets his hands settle on her back. His eyes close, his breathing evens out.

He’s home.

“You’re back,” she mutters after a second, her voice high with relief. Unfortunately, the words seem to snap her back to reality. She pulls back to look at him, and Cassian barely has time to mourn the loss of her warmth because her eyes are wide with worry and she’s shaking her head. “You can’t be here.”

His stomach drops. He can’t listen to this speech again. Not from her.

“People are really angry —”

“I’ve heard,” he interrupts her, not even bothering to hide the bitterness in his voice. There’s no point with her. He finally drops his hand from her back, and Jyn steps away, her eyes sad as she gazes at him. “I’m the social pariah. What’s new?”

“Fuck them. If Timm wasn’t already dead, I’d kill him myself.”

And he doesn’t doubt she would. Maybe not literally — but Jyn would have made him miserable, that he knows. She’s fiercely loyal and almost aggressively protective. Cassian considers himself privileged to be counted among those she’d go to battle for.

“But if the imps catch you…”

His gaze falls to the floor, a grimace on his face. He feels like a hand has wrapped around his heart, squeezing until he’s out of breath and panting from the pain. This is going to be difficult to say without looking into her eyes.

“Don’t worry, I’m not staying. I just came to get Maarva and Bee, then we’re gone. I got some money, it’s enough to get us out of here and go somewhere far away. They won’t find me.”

“How did you manage that?” she asks. He doesn’t know if it’s incredulity or suspicion he hears in her voice.

But it’s not really a question he can answer, and he isn’t going to lie to her so he just shakes his head. “It’s safer if you don’t know.”

She doesn’t answer. When the silence stretches on, he can’t resist glancing up to see what she’s thinking, but the uncertainty and sorrow painted across her face is still a blow. He thinks she already knows where this is going.

“Will you come back?”

Another person wouldn’t have heard the waver in her voice. Cassian does. He swallows.

This isn’t the first time he had to leave. Youth centers and missing sisters and dead corpos — there was always something or another. His life has been an endless loop of goodbyes.

But he’d always come back. He always knew he would.

“Not this time.”

And it tears at him, the knowledge that this might be the last time they speak, but he can’t ask her to come with them. He won’t.

Jyn seems to know this too. Her gaze drops to her feet, but he catches the flash of pain that shoots across her face. She looks small, standing in front of him, arms wrapped around herself, eyes on the floor.

After a moment, she speaks. “What about Bix?”

What about me?

Cassian struggles to find the words, to calm his heart and steady his voice. “She has a life here. Family, friends. I’m not gonna ask her to leave that all behind for me.” He falters, wondering if he should go on. “She wouldn’t come anyway.”

Jyn looks up, something heavy shining in her eyes. It’s a rare thing, but he realizes he can’t tell what she’s thinking. Does she hate him for this, does she understand?

If anyone would, it’d be her.

He can’t stay. But he can’t ask her to come.

“So this is goodbye?”

He gives a small nod. His voice is quiet and gentle when he speaks, “Afraid so. I’m going to miss you, Jyn Erso.”

A noise leaves her lips; half a laugh, half a sob. He’s one of the few lucky ones who knows her true last name, and the realization that he’ll never get to say it again and watch her eyes soften is almost too much for him. It’s a secret he’ll tuck away close to his heart and take to the grave. A name he’ll remember when all else had been forgotten.

“I’m going to miss you too, Kassa.”

He can’t bear to touch her again, or he’ll crumble. If he doesn’t go now, he never will. He turns around, heart aching, ignoring every last part of him that screams to stay. He should be getting back to Maarva, they should be leaving soon. Before the sun comes up, before the time grappler rings his anvil to announce the start of a new day.

He stops only at the entrance of the ship, rapping his knuckles against the broken door as he turns back one last time to meet her eyes.

“Anything I leave behind is yours to keep. Just don’t hold onto my memory too tight. Be safe, Jyn. You’re gonna change this galaxy one day.”

He turns away before she could respond because he’s a coward.

He doesn’t want to see her cry.

xxx

He’s alone again.

Somehow, it always ends like this.

He really thought this was it, the chance at a quiet life he’s been seeking all his life. Go somewhere warm and easy, start again. But Maarva had rejected him, had stubbornly insisted on staying, and if she was staying, so was Bee. And if they were staying…

Cassian would never be free of this cycle. Look for Kerri, come back for Maarva, come back for Bee, come back for Jyn, look for Kerri, run from the law, look for Kerri, come back for Maarva…

How is it fair? That she’d take him from his sister, his people, his home, the only place he’d ever known, then refuse to even stick with him? Isn’t he owed her loyalty at least? Shouldn’t a mother choose her son?

He’s here, living and breathing and real, and she’s choosing an idea over him.

He tries to shake it off, but it eats at him the whole ride. He’s leaving Ferrix with nothing but his credits and the clothes on his back. Neither will keep him company or chase away the stifling loneliness he already feels settling around him.

Everything he’s been through, only to end up back where he started. Richer, perhaps, but no less alone.

What a joke his life has become.

The ship he bought from the doctor is waiting in the Wastelands, as close to the city as he dared to park it, but apparently not hidden well enough. Cassian stops dead in his tracks when he arrives, shock overpowering any other emotion he’s feeling.

“How did you…”

Jyn shrugs, leaning against her speeder, hands in her pockets. “I know you.” She kicks herself off the bike, looks around, and gives him a questioning look when she realizes he’s alone. “Maarva and Bee?”

Cassian’s gaze drops. “They’re not coming.”

She doesn’t answer right away, but he feels her gaze burning into him, assessing. He doesn’t really have to say anything else for her to understand. She heard his tone, heard his bitterness. Knows Maarva and their complicated history almost as well as he knows it. Enough to put the pieces together.

“Well, we don’t need them anyway.”

He looks up at her then, his heart hammering. He sees the bag at her feet. The determination written plain across her face. But he doesn’t dare hope.

“What are you…”

“You were not going to ask me to come with you.”

“I told you I can’t.”

She snorts, shaking her head at him in fondness. “The one time you’re selfless.”

She didn’t mean it as a jab, but his lips pull into a frown. He was trying to be, yes. He has no illusions about himself. But Jyn deserves better than his usual brand of selfishness.

How could he ask her to leave behind everything she’s ever known? The home she found after losing her first one?

“Your shop —”

“Fuck the shop.”

“Brasso —”

“He’ll be fine,” she cuts him off again and takes a step closer. She sounds so confident, and he’s more than eager to believe her. But what would he do if she changed her mind a year from now — or worse. Began to resent him for it?

“It’s a big choice to make,” he points out. Has she really no doubts?

“Are you trying to talk me out of it?”

“No, no, it’s just that…”

Maarva hadn’t chosen him. Why would Jyn?

The unspoken question sits on his lips, and she knows him too much to miss it. Without hesitation, she snatches his hand and squeezes it, never breaking eye contact. She looks certain. As certain as he’s ever seen her. The same look of determination on her face that she gets when suggesting some terrible idea that’d get them both in trouble.

“I want to come. If you’ll take me. Let’s go see the galaxy.”

Giving him a choice, as she always would.

He’s never been able to say no.

He smiles, a waver in his voice as he tells her, “Welcome home.”

#my fics #rebelcaptain #dailyrebelcaptain #therebelcaptainnetwork #andor spoilers #look i know he’s a mess and he made mistakes but i just want someone in cassian’s corner #is that so much to ask?

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