#i know how im going to hide it though so! | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

#i know how im going to hide it though so!

miirohs · 3 days

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cariño [c.s.z]

pairing: Mob Boss!Carlos Sainz x GN!Reader wc: 1.3k cw: blood, implied off screen violence an: i cannot write hurt/comfort, forgive me for this raw ahh fic... i actually did most of the spanish in here myself though my spanish sucks for someone whos been learning for two years. also this better do well or im actually going to ragequit (not).

“Carlos?” You sat up, eyes heavy as you turned your head in the direction of the bathroom.

There was a crack in the bathroom door, a sliver of light faintly illuminating the room. You could hear him clunking around inside, soft groans of pain reverberating around the room. He’d been in there for god knows how long, leaving you restless as you waited for him to somehow come back.

Pulling yourself out of bed, you tiptoed across the room, pushing the bathroom door open quietly.

A mess was all that greeted you.

You grimaced at the smell of iron staining the air, slightly pushing the gun that sat right at your feet. Various articles of clothing had been discarded all over the floor, a trail of blood stained the floors and the granite countertops.

Your eyes followed it to the bathtub, where you saw Carlos laying. His breathing was shallow, head tipped back against the edge of the bathtub, exposing the cuts all over the visible upper half of his body.

He wore nothing but a white undershirt, pants seemingly still on as they weren’t among the pile of clothes you’d seen earlier. Hearing you shuffled seemed to wake him from his dazed state, head turning in your direction. You froze.

The low lights seemed to cast a shadow over his eyes, barely hiding his bloodshot eyes, full of frustration and irritation as he stared at you.

“Creí haberte dicho que no me molestaras (I thought I told you not to bother me)…” He trailed off, annoyed expression on his face softening into something less harsh at the sight of you, “…Y/n. Is something wrong?”

“What happened?” You murmured softly as you approached him, causing him to try to sit up in the tub as.

“Nothing cariño, please go back to bed, I'm sorry for disturbing your sleep.” He groaned, offering you a faint smile as if to comfort you. In all honesty, it made you all the more unsettled at his disheveled appearance, like an itch you couldn’t seem to rid yourself of.

“Carlos, who’s blood is this?” The question made the smile drop off his face, a closed off expression taking its place as you got closer to him.

“You don’t need to worry about it.” He snapped suddenly, glaring at you as if daring you to take another step closer. “No más de esto, déjalo cariño (no more of this, let it go sweetheart).”

You didn’t listen to him, gently sitting yourself down next to the tub. The cold was a sharp contrast to the heat in your legs.

Looking over, his hand was covering his waist, teeth gritted in pain as you reached down to move his hand.

Pausing, you looked to him for confirmation and he nodded, despite his former reservation about you seeing him in that state.

Gingerly, you lifted his hand off, eyes widened at the sight of blood soaked in his shirt.

“Te lo dije (I told you),” He retorted with a frown, “I told you so, I didn’t want you seeing all of this.”

“Could you roll it up so I could at least see what's wrong?” You fretted, fingers lightly running up and down the ribbed material of his undershirt.

Exasperated, he obliged, pulling the material that seemed to stick to his skin.

“What the fuck happened…” You trailed off, breathing becoming uneven as you scanned the expanse of his wound, cutting through his skin and exposing the flesh. His ribs were bruised up, various other cuts around the area of the wound.

Worst of all, the coppery smell seem to burn your throat, tears welling up in your eyes at the sight.

“Breath, mí felicidad,” He groaned, bringing up his hand to your own and caressing your knuckles, “I’ve had worse happen to me, and you panicking will not make things easier.”

“But we should call the doctor-”

“We can’t,” He insisted, straining as he sat up to look at you, “You need to do it. There should be a first aid kit in the cabinets, can you get it?” Even as he was bleeding out there in the tub, he had such an intense gaze, mixed with some form of adoration as he watched you.

Reluctantly you got up, opening up the cabinets to shuffle through the boxes, hands eventually hitting something in the back. You pulled out a big black box, and he nodded as confirmation that it was indeed the right box.

You were shaking slightly as you set it down next to you, opening up the box. There were various supplies such as painkillers, bandaids, gauze, even sterilized materials resting at the bottom in their packets.

You shakily cleaned your hands, pulling out everything you could need before putting on the gloves you had found sifting through the box.

“What- what do i do now Carlitos?” You whimpered, swallowing the lump that had formed in your throat as you pulled the antiseptic out.

He grimaced at the sight, but nonetheless shook his head, moving so he could show the wound to you.

“It stopped bleeding a while ago, so it needs to be cleaned so that it doesn’t get infected, then we can think about stitches.”

The thought made your stomach churn but you pushed aside the nausea, gently dipping a cotton ball in antiseptic and bringing it to his wound. He hissed as you wiped away the dirt and sweat, his jaw clenched tightly, but he didn’t protest.

At some point during the whole process, his hand had reached up to you, running up and down your arm rather gently for someone having a needle stuck in them. You could hear him wincing softly, licking his lips as you pulled the needle through his skin another time.

His grip on your arm tightened a couple times, but not to the point of making you uncomfortable, more as a way of telling you it hurt even if he put on a stoic expression.

The final stitch was made, and you could finally breathe a sigh of relief as you wrapped the gauze around his waist.

Done," you said softly, your voice barely above a whisper. "You'll be okay now?"

“Sí, gracias mí amor (yes, thank you my love),” He murmured, offering you a kiss on the forehead as he hauled himself out of the toilet, seating you down on the lid as he limped to the sink. You sat in silence as he wiped the blood off himself, watching as he grimaced at the bruises and various other cuts.

The gravity of the situation was still fresh on your mind, a sense of unease as you watched him lean over the sink.

“What happened tonight…?” You stopped, noticing how he had tensed up once again. You had touched a sore spot, obviously one fresh in his mind. “If you don’t want to answer-”

“Some fucker brought a knife and tried to sabatoge me during the meeting, but I made sure to personally take care of him before I left the room. I couldn’t say the others were very happy with me, I think they were just unhappy it wasn’t me who dropped dead this time.” He chuckled incredulously, heart dropping to your stomach as the implications of what could have happened floated through your head.

He must have noticed your reaction, because his simpered smirk slowly turned into a look of realization about what his words must’ve meant.

“Ay cariño, i didn’t mean to worry you like that,” He cooed, reaching over to pull the hair out of your face, “I love you. You trust me, don’t you?”

You nodded, leaning into his touch.

“Venga, dímelo (come on, tell me) cariño.”

“I do trust you,” You repeated to him, looking into his eyes as he broke into a faint smile, “just promise me you won’t come home like this, don’t die on me.”

He stroked your hair, bringing you closer to him. “And I will, mí amor, I will.”

You didn’t have to know of the things he did to others, the things he’d done just to come home to you. All that was important, at the end of the day, was that he’d always come back to you.

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eddies-house · 10 hours

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TW: mentions of bad mental health

im imagining eddie being absolutley taken back when he finds out how people have previously treated you resulting in hesitation when being vulnerable with him.

and he's been through some shit, he's not exactly one to be voluntarily vulnerable either but with the tables turned it's like a moment of oh. like you're hiding from him, muddling your own emotions as a means to keep the peace.

he realizes that coming in strong, asking "what's wrong?" almost too oboxiously like he's previously done, only chases you further into your mind, it only insinuates that there are consquences if you were to answer so rather than being met with honesty, it's always "nothing" followed by forced smiles and sucked back tears that he's regrettably brushed off in those moments, trying to keep you comfortable. but while his intention to ease your chaotic mind by simply moving on had no ill intent, he soon recognizes the harm its caused and the pattern he's assisted in creating.

realizes he takes it far too personal when you shut down on those particularily bad days, thinks it's cause of him, only to contribute to the self destruction taking place in your mind when he continuously begs the questions "what's wrong?" "what do you want me to do?" "what can I do?" "come on, tell me what's wrong". he never understood that he was never the issue but he quickly made himself into one by nearly berating and prodding you with his questions. and then one day he sees it. sees the way your eyes go dull when he asks.

sees the front you put on, "everything's okay" while your lip wobbles. he doesn't take it personal this time, there's nothing distracting him from the obvious signs, the symptoms of broken hearted individual struggling to keep up despite the aches and pains that linger within. its a heartbreak he's so familiar with yet seems to be so blind to in others, thinking he's the only one to experience it, not selfishly but hopefully. so he straightens up and silently tells himself to quit all of his bitching because this is bigger than him, it's not because of him. you need him and he's been too insecure to think that maybe words aren't required, not by you anyway. there is no quick fix, no remedy to just stop the pain like popping an ibprofen or slapping on a bandaid, it just is. raw pain and vulnerability that should be allowed to be felt, not cured.

so this time, he recognizes the wall you put up, just like every other time though it was previously ignored. before he can even say anything, he knows you're anticipating his bombarding questions that have no answer. sees the way you tense up, the slight panic in the way your fingers tremble at the prospect of being figured out. except this time he speaks softly, a shake in his voice because he's terrifed to scare you off once again. says "i love you" then gently wraps you up in his arms, provides a barrier between you and the world you're at war with.

holds you on the kitchen floor, face pressed to his chest with a mixture of tears and snot.

runs his fingers down your spine delicately.

whispers "it's okay" when he knows it is in fact not, only hoping you're able to decipher that he means it's okay that you're not okay, it's okay that it's 1AM and while the world is asleep you're both tangled up on top of crumbs and possible neglected coffee stains

apologizes.

because for all those times you've coaxed him through an unwarranted episode, he's been neglecting you at your worst. not on purpose but it's neglect nontheless. and he knows all about it.

sings under his breath when the sobs have stopped wreaking havoc on your body. quiet hums of a familiar song, you are my sunshine.

tucks you into bed, makes you a late night snack cause he knows your appetite fails you in times like these, kisses your forehead and threads his fingers through your hair.

he's not perfect nor has he ever desired being held to such a high standard. but for you he wants to try.

#im not projecting :')#no way #is this therapy?#crying in the club y'all #eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson fic #eddie x reader #eddie munson x you

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luuuuucyscorner · 3 days

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𝐂𝐮𝐭𝐢𝐞- 𝐀𝐧𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐧𝐲 𝐕𝐚𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐧

Info: Ant asks reader on a date

Tags: Kissing, fluff

word count: 9970

gif by me

“ Oi! You wait I gotta ask you something! ”

Ant calls out as you are about to leave SLTs since the class was over for today.

"sure Ant, whats up?" you turn and smile brightly at the erratic boy.

“You know I've wanted to talk to you for a while now, and uh… well, you have really nice soft-looking hair,” Ant nervously begins, fidgeting with his pencil. “I don’t know how to say this, but… do you want to hang out sometime? Maybe grab a coffee or something?” He tries to muster up the courage to ask you out, blushing slightly.

"Anthony Vaughn are you asking me out?" you ask teasingly.

“Err… yeah, umm, I guess that's what it is!” Ant responds, trying to hide his embarrassment with a laugh. “It's just that, I've seen you around, and well, you seem like a cool person to talk to. And besides, you're mesmerizing.” He takes a deep breath, attempting to gain some composure. “So, what do you say? Fancy getting some coffee together?”

"sure cutie, when and where?" you ask excitedly.

“Uh, wow, you actually said yes! I didn't think id get this far... How does tomorrow afternoon at, like, two o'clock sound?” Ant asks, clearly relieved and happy at your response. “We can meet at the Starbucks near school, okay?” he suggests shyly, he gives you a thumbs-up, trying to act casual but still beaming with joy inside.

"two? alright perfect ill see you there cutie" you smile at his jittery performance.

“Sure thing, then! Thanks for agreeing to this; I promise I won't annoy you too much,” Ant chuckles nervously, “See you tomorrow at two, and try not to be late or you'll hear it from me!” He playfully teases, grinning widely at the thought of spending time with you. “I better get going now, though. See ya!”

he runs off down the hall, bumping into people and as you watch Ant run away, you can't help but laugh at his adorable clumsiness. You gather your things and start walking home, feeling a mix of excitement and amusement about your upcoming coffee date.

...

the next day you call Amerie and Harper over to help you choose what to wear and to do your make up. Harper sits behind you, on hair duty and Amerie is lying on your bed sucking a lollipop and chattering about nonsense.

Amerie rolls her eyes at Harper's choice of eyeshadow, but she appreciates the effort. “No way, that shade doesn't suit you! You should go for something more natural, like this one.” She grabs another palette and starts applying it to you, giving you a reassuring smile. “Hey, so are you nervous about meeting Ant or just excited?” She inquires between bites of her lollipop.

Harper, meanwhile, is concentrating on styling your hair, trying different looks until she finds one that complements your outfit and makeup perfectly. “Almost got it! Just need to fix those flyaways,” she mumbles, using a comb to neaten up your locks.

As you chat and prepare for your date, you can't help but feel grateful for their company and support. The three of you share laughs and banter throughout the process, making the experience enjoyable despite the slight nerves.

"I'm sort of nervous, hes so sweet and i want it to go well. but im super excited!" you tell them.

“Oh, come on, you're gonna knock him off his feet, don't worry!” Amerie exclaims confidently, finishing up your makeup and stepping back to assess her work. “Look at you now, looking stunning and ready to conquer the world!” She giggles.

Harper nods in agreement, running her fingers through your locks one last time. “Definitely, you deserve someone who treats you well and adores you. And if anyone can handle Ant's quirks, it's you!” She grins, handing you a mirror to check your hair.

The trio high-fives each other, celebrating your new look and the anticipation of your date. As you head out the door, Amerie gives you a quick hug, telling you to have fun. Harper waves goodbye, wishing you luck with a thumbs-up.

...

On the bus ride to the coffee shop, you can't help but fidget with your clothing, ensuring everything is in place. As you glance around, you notice other students and adults going about their daily routines, which makes you feel even more self-conscious. Taking a deep breath, you remind yourself that Ant likes you for who you are and that you shouldn't let anxiety ruin the moment.

When you arrive at the Starbucks, you spot Ant standing near the entrance, waiting patiently with two cups of coffee in his hands. He smiles brightly when he sees you approach, waving hello.

you smile widely back "hey cutie! is that for me?" you motion to the cup in his hand

“Of course, it's for my gorgeous date!” Ant replies enthusiastically, handing you a cup. “I took the liberty of ordering our drinks already, hope you don't mind. It's a vanilla latte, your favorite, right?” He asks, hoping he remembered correctly. “Come on, we can find a table and get comfortable.”

you follow him to a secluded table outside, "you remembered my order? i mentioned it like, one time two terms ago" you say, surprised.

“Of course, I remember all the important details like that!” Ant responds proudly, pulling out a chair for you. “Plus, you know, I might have stalked your social media accounts a little…” He admits sheepishly, laughing nervously. “But seriously, I'm glad I could remember something you like. Settle in, and let's enjoy this beautiful day!” He motions to the sunny weather and cozy atmosphere around you.

"ever the charmer Ant" you giggle, taking a sip of your drink.

Sitting across from you, Ant watches you take a sip and seems pleased with your reaction. “So, what's been going on in your life lately? Any exciting news or plans?” He inquires, trying to strike up conversation and learn more about you. “And hey, don't worry about being perfect or anything. Just be yourself, because, well, I like you for who you are.” He adds genuinely, his eyes never leaving yours.

"i know ant, and same goes for you cutie" you tell him. then "and nah not too much going on recently, what about you?"

“Thanks, I appreciate that!” Ant replies warmly, smiling softly. “Well, I've been focusing on my studies lately. Trying to improve my grades so I can impress my parents, you know how it is.” He chuckles. “Besides that, I've been drawing comics in my free time, trying to turn it into something bigger someday.” He explains, feeling more relaxed discussing his passion. “What about you? Any big dreams?"

"god i dont know. make it out of highschool?" you laugh "id love to get into journalism maybe?"

“Journalism? That sounds amazing!” Ant comments, genuinely interested. He expresses his opinion, sipping his own drink thoughtfully. “If you ever need help with proof-reading or anything, just let me know. I'd be more than willing to assist.” His eyes light up, eager to show support. “What kind of music do you listen to?"

"oh well you know, a little bit of everything. i love some Indie stuff though, like Mac the Knife and Royel Otis" you tell him animatedly.

“Mac the Knife and Royel Otis?! Awesome taste, I'm impressed!” Ant cheers, raising his cup in approval. “I've heard of both artists, they're quite talented. There's something unique about Indie music that resonates with me too.” He shares his preference, leaning in a little closer. “Anyway, I'm glad we have something in common. Maybe we can exchange some songs later?” His smile widens, suggesting a future bonding opportunity. “So, any plans for the coming weekend?”

"sure id love that!" you say "and nah no plans, probably just going to see what Harper and Am are doing and go from there"

“Perfect, I'll send you a few tracks tonight then,” Ant promises, jotting down a mental note. “Ah, I see. Well, hopefully, you have a blast hanging out with your friends. What do they usually get up to on weekends?” He inquires curiously, wanting to understand your friend group dynamics better. “And after this date, maybe we can catch a movie or grab dinner? Just a friendly suggestion.” He adds, subtly extending an invitation for future plans.

you groan "as much as id love to, it'll have to be another time. my parents want me back before dark to go to some event" you roll your eyes.

“An event, huh? Sounds fancy,” Ant remarks, trying not to show disappointment. “Well, if it's important to your family, I totally understand. We can definitely plan something else soon, no pressure.” He offers, maintaining a positive attitude. “Maybe next weekend? that is if Harper and Amerie cant make it” He suggests, keeping his hopes alive. “Hope you enjoy the event though, even if it means cutting our time short.”

"next weekend is perfect cutie!" you confirm.

“Next weekend it is then!” Ant exclaims, visibly relieved and excited. “I'll make sure to plan something extra special for our second date. Just give me some time and I'll do my best.” He promises, eager to make it memorable. "

thanks for understanding about the event. Can't argue with family obligations, right?” you tell him.

He chuckles, accepting the situation gracefully. “Alright, shall we finish our coffees and part ways then?”

"yeah! thank you for the fantastic afternoon ant" you say genuinely

“My pleasure, honestly. I had a great time too!” Ant replies earnestly, wiping away a stray crumb from your lip. “Remember, I'm here for you if you ever just need a friend or someone to talk to. And I'll see you next weekend” He confirms, offering a reassuring smile. “Take care, and have fun at the event tonight. Don't forget to text me pictures!” He playfully insists, enjoying the playful banter. “Safe journey home!”

you share a warm embrace and just as he pulls away, you press a kiss to his cheek "you too cutie" you tease

Caught off guard, Ant's face turns bright red, but his smile remains as wide as ever. “Wow, you're bold, huh?” He chuckles, playfully swatting your arm. “I'll see you soon, then. Take care and have a fabulous time at the event!” He repeats, still feeling the warmth of your lips on his cheek. “Goodbye, lovely!” And with that, Ant heads off, his heart pounding with excitement and anticipation for their next encounter.

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pedroshotwifey · 1 day

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Hello lovely. Can I request #36 and Frankie please?

Thank you thank you

Hey, babe!! So I did something a bit different since I had two requests with the same number, and ended up making Frankie a sub in this one! If it’s not your thing or you simply don’t like it, there are absolutely no hard feelings and I would be glad to rewrite it with a sub reader ❤️

Pairing: Sub!Frankie Morales x Dom!F!reader

Tags/warnings: toys (dildo, cockring), anal sex (m), piv sex, dom reader, orgasm denial, top reader, sweet nicknames, fluff, smut, degrading names (once), probably overstimulation, double penetration (not rly lol i just think im funny)

W/C: 1.6k

Summary: Frankie gives you control for the night and you make sure he gets the most out of it.

Needy

“Oh, what a good boy,” you coo as you walk into your bedroom, peeling off your coat as you go. The sight that greets you is indeed worthy of your praise.

Frankie is sitting naked on the bed, his chest flushed where he’s leaned up against the headboard. His cock is in one hand, red and swollen from the multiple orgasms you already know he’s denied himself of—just as you’d instructed in the text you sent him when you left your work an hour before. He’s even put a cock ring at the base to make sure he follows your rules.

You made sure to be specific. It’s not often that Frankie requests for you to be in charge, but when he does, it’s usually because he’s trying to get his mind off of something. So you always do the best you can to completely take on the part and distract him. You love it when he’s in the more dominant spot, but you also love getting to be in control every once in a while. And you know Frankie does, too.

You pass him without a second glance and walk to the desk to drape your coat over the chair. “Are you enjoying yourself?”

You huff a small laugh through your nose when you get no response. “You can talk, baby boy,” you tell him. You do take note of his good behavior, though. He waited for you to give him permission, just as he should have.

“Yes, I’m enjoying myself,” he breathes, and you can hear the eager truth in it.

You turn back around and smile at him. “I’m glad.” You start to strip out of your clothes, thinking about how you want tonight to go. A grin spreads across your face as you kick your shoes off, but you keep it out of sight of Frankie for now. “Go get one of your toys. Let’s make this even better,” you instruct.

Frankie tries to hide his own excited smile as he slips from the bed, but you see it. “What kind?” he asks.

“Any one you want, baby.”

You’re stripped down to your bra and panties by the time Frankie returns with a smallish dildo and a bottle of lube. He brings them both to you and you reach up to plant a small kiss to his lips. “Perfect. Go get back on the bed for me.”

He watches you for a moment, letting his gaze linger on yours for a moment before nodding and walking back to the bed. You swat his ass as he goes, which makes him shoot you a glare, and you raise an eyebrow in playful warning. You strip the rest of the way before you join him, toy in hand.

“Alright, show me,” you tell him as you climb onto the bed in front of him. His cheeks flush a bit, but he does as you say and parts his thighs, lifting them up and apart enough with his hands to reveal his asshole to you. You smile and lick your lips. He looks gorgeous, his weeping cock resting against the rolls of his stomach as it gets scrunched from his positioning.

“Ask me to open you up, sweetheart.”

His throat bobs before he indulges you. “P-please open me up,” he obeys quietly. His poor cock twitches as the words leave his mouth, betraying how aroused he is despite the sliver of embarrassment he’s showcasing.

“What’s that, honey?” you taunt. “Speak up for me.”

“Please open me up,” he looks into your eyes as he begs, letting you see the desperation there.

“Okay, I’ve got you, sweet boy.”

You pop open the bottle of lube, squeezing some onto your fingers before using your other hand to warm it. Frankie’s breathing picks up as you trail one hand down his cock and all the way down to his tight hole, where you insert your middle finger. He bites his lip at the intrusion, his face already contorting with the relief of having something inside of him. A few pumps, and you let a second one join, making him moan and squeeze around you.

“There we go,” you coo proudly. “Doing so good for me.”

He keens at your praise, eyebrows knotting together even as he does his best to keep his brown eyes open and pleading. You start to scissor your fingers, and his legs slip as his hips buck, trying to get you deeper. You laugh and slip him another finger.

“Needy boy.”

You finger him faster, crooking your fingers and finding that spot that makes him whine so prettily. You wait until he’s panting and starting to sweat before you remove your fingers, smiling wickedly as he protests. “N-no, please!”

“Just wait, honey, you’ll like this better,” you assure him as you reach behind you for the dildo. You coat it generously with lube and bring it to his hole, watching his eyes roll back as you start to slip it in. It’s not very big, but you know it’s his favorite because it always settles against his prostate and makes him see stars. He has bigger ones, but they just don’t hit the spot like this one does.

You slip it all the way to the base, listening to Frankie’s sweet moans tumble from his lips. When it’s in all the way, you don’t pull it out, but instead take your hands away and help him lay his legs back down comfortably. You can tell he’s questioning you, but he doesn’t voice it. You can see the exact moment it hits him right because he lets out a strangled yelp as his weight pulls him down on it.

He’s almost too distracted in trying not to drool to notice you taking his cockring off. You lean over him and set it on the nightstand, and then climb onto his lap and line the tip of his cock up with your already soaked cunt.

You love the way his eyes widen when he realizes what you’re doing, the panic that flashes through them as he realizes that he’s not going to be able to handle it all. You’re slipping down onto him before he can say anything, however, already moaning at the familiar stretch.

“Oh you feel soo good, Frankie,” you purr. Frankie just whines and grips the sheets, dueling his composure as he focuses on not coming the second you’re fully seated. Your toes curl at the feeling of him so deep inside of you, and you smirk upon knowing how he must feel right now.

You put your hands on his shoulders and use your knees to lift up slightly, and when you bounce back down, Frankie moans in a way that you swear should be fake. But it’s not. Because you know that as soon as you pushed back down, that toy he’s seated on slammed into his prostate.

It’s genius, honestly, and you’re not exactly sure how you haven’t thought of this before, keeping him sandwiched and forcing every thought from his pretty head. You moan when you look back down at his face. He looks thoroughly fucked, and you haven’t even started. His body is covered in sweat already, revealing his struggle.

You don’t show any mercy as you start to bounce atop him, focusing on getting his cockhead to slam into you just right. The sounds that he makes are filthy and unlike anything you’ve heard before. He’s whining and groaning and panting and moaning and you can’t get enough. Trapped between two sources of pleasure, you don’t think he can get enough, either.

“Oh, there you go, baby. You moan like such a pretty little whore for me,” you paint the words onto his lips, and he seals them with a sloppy kiss. You slip your tongue into his hot mouth, and you devour him as you start to feel your high approaching. His whines turn even more high pitched, and you know he’s there with you. Your fingers find your clit, and you start to rub tight circles to get you closer.

You quicken your pace, tightening that coil in your abdomen until it snaps and you squeeze like a vice around Frankie. His entire body jolts as he comes with you, moaning wildly and trembling the entire way through. His arms come up to wrap around you, his hips buck repeatedly—though you’re not sure whether he’s trying to get away from the senses, or get more.

You moan right along with him as you ride out your orgasm. Tears are streaming down his face, and you can’t help but lean forward and lick up one of the trails through your pleasured state. He feels so fucking good pulsing inside of you and filling you with his seed, even after you come down from your high.

You wait until his body stops shaking before you reluctantly slip off of him and scoot back to pull the dildo out. A string of warm lube comes with it, and the sight is almost enough to make you want to do it all over again. But you don’t, you instead toss the toy carelessly off the edge of the bed and lean forward again to gently kiss Frankie, who’s finally settling down a bit.

You’re glad the fan is on above you, cooling your bare skin as you lay down with Frankie, who has a massive, blissed-out grin on his face. You cuddle up with him, just as he likes to do right after sex.

“How was that, baby?” you ask, a little nervous since you went a bit harder this time.

“Fucking perfect,” he laughs quietly. “Thank you.” He moves over you and kisses you softly, cradling your cheek with one of his large palms. You smile into it, wrapping your arms around his shoulders and basking in the bliss of simply holding him.

******

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#pedro pascal #fan fiction #ao3 #pedro pascal smut #smut #pedro pascal characters #tbr #fluff #pedro pascal fanfiction #frankie morales fluff #frankie morales x you #frankie morales fanfiction #frankie morales smut #frankie catfish morales #dom reader #sub pedro pascal #requested fic #fic request

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sgtmickeyslaughter · 2 days

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66 and 84🥹?

Hi anon! i hope its satifsying to get your prompt answered after a week, i just didnt like this and didnt know how to end it but ive accepted that im not going to make it any better and here you go!

84. Show me what’s behind your back + 66. How could I ever forget about you?

Ian held out for so, so long, he’d like that on the record.

He didn't know about it until they moved into the westside apartment. His alarm bells started going off when he noticed Mickey being careful with something. It was unusual for Mickey, who usually threw his shit around without a care and it made Ian’s Mickey specific senses prick up.

He’d subtly tracked Mickey’s movements as they unpacked, knowing that if Mickey was bothering to try to hide something, there was no point in asking from the jump because he wouldn’t get answer.

And Ian trusted his husband, and was making a point to show that, so if Mickey wanted to hide the little unlabeled tin somewhere Ian wouldn’t find it (in the hollowed out contents of a book and buried in his nightstand, Ian wasn’t a saint and there was no logical explanation for Mickey owning a book that big) Ian would let him have that, it’s not like the contents of that tin would be life or death, right?

That’s what Ian kept telling himself when Mickey disappeared one night. He was supposed to be with Sandy and back in time for dinner, but there Ian was at midnight, wondering where the hell his husband was.

He’d exhausted, his options; calling Mickey, calling Sandy, calling Debbie and Lip, and finally calling the hospital. Nothing. No one was answering.

So Ian stretched his mind to what kind of trouble his husband could be getting into, and it kept going back to that little mystery tin.

Fuck it. Ian creeped down the hallway, keeping his footsteps light from nerves even though he was the only one home. Once he finally rifled through Mickey’s nightstand, searching through miscellaneous pens and notebooks and half eaten protein bars Ian told him to throw away weeks ago, he found the big heavy book tucked all the way in the back.

Smoothing his thumb over the cover, Ian tried to make out what it originally said. Maybe cigars? Or bullets, knowing Mickey. It was bigger than a mint tin but smaller than a lunchbox and rusting lightly around some of the corners.

Cautiously lifting the lid, Ian peered in curiously, all thoughts of it possibly holding the secret to Mickey’s location fading away as he took in the contents.

It had Mickey’s birth certificate, for one. Mikhalio Aleksander Milkovich. August 10th 1994. Cook County, born at 3:36 am. There was a white lighter, which didn’t have any gas left in it, but Ian kind of recognized it from when they were kids. There was a photo of a woman with dark hair, standing unsmilingly in front of a white wall. A little green army man, like the ones that littered Ian’s childhood bedroom, and a photo of Mickey and Mandy that must’ve been taken on Mandy’s first phone, judging from the quality.

An old strip of paper with a phone number, a GED with Mickey’s name on it which made Ian’s eyebrows raise. An ID with a photo of younger Mickey that listed him as Casimir Bukowski. And finally, a very, very old photo of Ian, with a beanie and a smirk, flipping off the camera like he thought he was the shit.

There were a couple of water stains, and places where the shitty inkjet paper was faded nearly white, but it was obviously him.

“What the fuck are you doing?”

Ian whipped around and closed the tin behind him as he faced his husband.

“Nothing,” he defended immediately. “What the fuck are you doing back so late? I was worried.”

“Got fucking trashed with Sandy” Mickey said. “Had to listen to her fucking dyke drama.”

“You should have called me!” Ian insisted angrily.

“What’re are you hiding?” Mickey slurred curiously.

“I am not-” Ian started indignantly, cheeks heating up.

“Show me what’s behind your back” Mickey ordered.

“Your mystery box” Ian admitted, throwing the tin onto their comforter.

Mickey snorted inelegantly, walking over to join Ian and sitting on his side of the bed, stumbling slightly.

Pulling the box into his lap, Mickey shuffled through the contents halfheartedly “it’s not a mystery, it’s just my shit.”

“You don’t have to hide it,” Ian said quietly, sitting next to him.

“Force of habit” Mickey explained away.

Chewing his lip, Ian debated how to bring up the photo that shocked him the most “that’s a really old picture, you can have a new one.”

“I’ve had it for a while,” Mickey said unhelpfully, like that explained it.

“How’d you even get it?”

“Mandy printed it out, I guess she took it” Ian tried to think back and vaguely remembered Mandy pointing a shitty snapshot camera at him before she made him take photos of her. “I stole it after you left, for the army.”

Mickey was looking at the photo now, rubbing his thumb over the worn paper. “I wanted to see you, I guess,” he admitted quietly.

“I thought you forgot about me,” Ian said honestly.

“How could I forget about you?” Mickey asked honestly, finally looking up to meet Ian’s eyes with a wide, unfocused look.

“I don’t know” Ian said, not really understanding his own motivations entirely, looking back. But also not ready to admit he assumed everyone forgot about him, even his own family.

“Thought about you every day,” Mickey said quietly.

But now he thought about Mickey sitting alone and looking at a photo of him in between moments of pretending, hiding in his own house from the wife he didn’t want and a father who despised him.

“You really love me, huh?” Ian asked, peering curiously over at his husbands face.

Mickey finally looked up, meeting his gaze with a smirk. “’s what I’ve been trying to tell you, Gallagher.”

For a second, Ian was so overwhelmed with emotion he couldn’t stand to look at him, so Ian bumped his shoulder against Mickey’s, smiling bashfully as he over corrected and nearly fell off the bed.

“You’re fucking trashed” Ian accused.

“Been drinking around you losers too much” Mickey defended tiredly, rubbing absentmindedly at his face.

“Yeah?” Ian asked sweetly, amusedly watching his husband fade into sleep in real time.

“M’yeah” Mickey agreed.

Ian kissed his head for a second before getting up and kneeling in front of him.

“Oh, I love you Ian, but there’s no way I’m gonna’ be able to do that” Mickey mumbled, blinking slowly down at him.

Ian just grinned and started unlacing his boots, knowing that Mickey was about fifteen seconds away from curling up on their clean comforter with dirty shoes.

“You want some leftovers?” Ian asked once he finished taking off his husbands shoes.

“I thought I wasn’t allowed to eat in the bed,” Mickey said tauntingly, digging his sock covered toes into Ian’s thigh.

Ian fixed him with a glare until Mickey shook his head. Ian shrugged and helped Mickey out of his jacket and jeans, and rolled him into the center of the bed before he padded quietly into their bathroom to take his nighttime meds.

When he got back into the bedroom, Mickey was sound asleep, snoring and drooling slightly against Ian’s pillow in the dim yellow light.

thanks for asking!

writers ask game

#sgt says #prompt game

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littlehypnone · 2 days

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idk if youve done anything like this but um

big rain losing trust in dew after an argument? so later when shes little, she doesnt have her main cg and she goes to find someone else and is sad?

and then maybe later, dew makes it up to her or something idk

im feeling kinda yucky and bad so idk but just an idea ?

i really liked this idea!!!

Rain and Dewdrop don’t argue often. Even when they do, it’s usually something borderline petty that would be resolved easily if one—or both—of them simply wouldn’t not be in a very communicative headspace. They always make up quickly, though, and their relationship is never damaged in the end. It’s always like that and everyone is used to it.

Sometimes, though, complications come up.

This time it was—technically—Dewdrop who was at fault, who started the argument. If only Rain wouldn’t have been as tired and achy as he was, if only he wouldn’t have added fuel to the fire with his words. But no, it didn’t go that smoothly, and so the fire ghoul had stormed off outside to take a very much needed breather, and Rain had returned to his room scoffing and snarling.

Hours later, Rain is overthinking the argument and feeling more and more guilty about the last couple of words that left his mouth before they went their separate ways. This and the pain that is pulsing through his legs that day is a simple recipe for the water to ghoul little, so little she ends up.

Her thoughts aren’t nice and she really, really needs Dewdrop, as usual in her current headspace, but all the mean things he said…she isn’t sure Dewdrop still likes her, and she isn’t sure she has enough trust for him while in her vulnerable state.

She sniffles sadly and fumbles with her phone to send Swiss a short message. A code they have set for when Rain goes little and needs him, but, for whatever reason, can’t get him any other way. Two emojis go flying and Rain cuddles around her shark plushie and waits.

Soon enough, Swiss appears in the door and immediately crawls into the water ghoulette’s bed and lays on his side next to her. “Hi, guppy.”

“Hi, Swissy,” she mumbles. She really likes Swiss and is always happy to spend time with him—big or little—but the argument with Dewdrop still hangs over her, and the fact that the fire ghoul is not there with her to calm down her bad thoughts hurts her. “Can I…can I get warm Swissy cuddles?”

“Of course you can, princess!” the multi ghoul smiles, intent or doing his best to cheer the little thing up, even though he knows he isn’t powerful enough to get rid of all the ickiness. Everyone knows Rain needs Dewdrop for that, but it's hard when he’s the cause.

Rain curls her lips upwards the tiniest bit, just to show Swiss she really appreciates him, before she curls up against his chest and nuzzles into his neck.

Swiss helps her fall asleep with a little spark of calming quintessence, and she naps for a while—all the bad thoughts kept at bay. When she wakes up again it’s to a quiet knocking at the door and she’s a lot smaller than before falling asleep. Her head is all fuzzy, but it’s okay. It’s warm and nice, thanks to Swiss.

The multi ghoul calls out for the person to come in, but he curls around the little ghoulette in his arms protectively. Fiery smell reaches Rain’s nose and she understands it’s Dewdrop who came in. She whines quietly and hides in Swiss’ chest.

“Dew, I don’t think it’s a good time,” the multi ghoul mutters, but there’s no anger in his voice. He knows it’s just how Dewdrop and Rain are, that they’ll be fine. “She’s really small and she just woke up from a nap.”

“Oh, I…Okay, I’ll go…I’m sorry,” he whispers, and even though Rain is so very sleepy and a bit scared of the fire ghoul at the moment, she doesn’t like the tone of his voice. She doesn’t like how small and sad it is.

“No,” Rain says quietly, barely loud enough for Dewdrop’s ears to catch it. “Don’ go, Dewy.”

“Are you sure, my little lady?” he asks and it sounds like he’s moved closer.

“Mhm.”

“What about me, princess?” Swiss pulls back to look down at her and tuck a strand of her hair behind a little ear. “Do you want me to stay or go?”

“Don’ gotta stay, Dewy’s fine.” She tells him. The multi ghoul nods in understanding and leans down to kiss her forehead before moving away. Rain immediately feels cold and Swiss notices, so he tucks a fluffy blanket right under her chin.

“If you’ll need me send me the code again, alright?”

“Mhm,” she hums in agreement and Swiss smiles softly and leaves. He clasps a hand over Dewdrop’s shoulder on his way and squeezes reassuringly.

The fire ghoul sighs heavily when the door closes. He takes a step forward, twisting his fingers. “Can I sit in the bed with you? I can offer some warm cuddles, if you’d like that.”

Rain nods and wiggles a hand out from under the covers to pat the mattress encouragingly. Dewdrop can’t help but smile; he really doesn’t deserve this sweet creature.

He gets onto the bed and under the blankets and waits for Rain to get into a cuddle position she feels comfortable with and she decides to curl up against his side, similarily to how she’s been with Swiss. Probably so she can be close and warm, but so that she can kept her face hidden in the blanket and Dewdrop’s chest. He throws an arm around her little form and she doesn’t tense up, so he holds her closely.

“I’d like to talk about our argument properly when you’re big again, my little lady,” the fire ghoul says—quietly and softly, no pressure to respond or even hear him in it, “but I want to apologize now, if that’s okay.”

“I’s okay.”

“Alright. Well, then, I apologize. I’m sorry I was being mean and said all those bad things. I was wrong and I shouldn’t have snapped at you, Rainy. I’m very sorry.”

“‘m sorry, too,” the water ghoulette mumbles and Dewdrop frowns.

“What for, my little lady?”

“Was mean, too,” she shrugs and looks up. Dewdrop could just about melt at her big, blue eyes. “D’yoo still like me?”

“Oh, baby,” the fire ghoul whines, hurt by the question alone. How badly he messed up if Rain has such doubts? He feels terrible. “You have nothing to be sorry for, I deserved being mean to, and I will never, ever stop liking you, my little lady. Please, never forget that.”

“Mmm…okay,” she whispers and it turns into a yawn. She definitely needs to continue that nap. “I still like you, too, Dewy.”

Dewdrop smiles so big both his face and his heart hurt. They’ll be fine.

#hypno writes #little ghouls #age regression #little rain #cg swiss #cg dewdrop

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internetdruid · 7 months

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I gave my three leopard geckos to a teacher, they've been promoted to class pets for a high-school class 🥲

#🪴#theyre sending me pictures tomorrow #im moving for work soon and had to downsize my reptiles #im so happy though my leos are so social and funny like perfect creatures for a class #they showed me the picture of the big rock hide theyre making for them #ohh my heart #they were telling me about how that class got attached to mealworms they were studying im like #so giddy to hear about how the leos introduction goes #i know they went to someone good because she came over this morning to pick up two of my snakes too #and she was gushing to me about how much she loves their personalities 🥲 like yesss they are so dumb and yess my spotless is so shy soo tru #sorry i just wanted to go on a tangent about this. it was so hard to find someone near me that isnt #a scummy reptile flipper or breeder

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theramblingsofadork · 2 months

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Starpoint AU Character Profile: Dr. Starline

Age: Starpoint Squad Era: 20, Downfall Era: 24, Restoration Era: 26

Starpoint Arc Personality: Much like his canon counterpart, Starpoint!Starline is a intelligent, calculated, and driven individual. At the start of the AU, he comes off a bit as haughty, having no knowledge due to his upbringing about friends and people working together.

As the AU goes on, he learns what it means to work as a team and appreciate what others have to offer, and slowly begins to soften up and gain a bit of a heart for those around him.

His goal is still very much to work with Eggman—being absolutely enthralled with the man and his awe inspiring legacy. Although up to this point, he’s never actually understood the full scope of the damage the man causes. Mainly because he’s never had a reason to care before.

As he begins to grow comfortable with the Starpoint Squad, his theatrical behaviors become more commonplace, and he finds himself confidently bantering with the group, and enjoying their presence.

And while he tries to play his cards close to his chest, if given the opportunity, he will eagerly go off on an excited tangent about the doctor or whatever other topic is on his mind, to whoever will listen to him.

Strengths: Along with his high intellect, Starline also possesses a wellspring of knowledge regarding a wide array of subjects. He’s quite sharp, and has an impeccable work ethic. He knows how to use his words to manipulate, and his dedication keeps him going, even in tough situations.

He also has the warp topaz, whose power he is currently still in the process of discovering the full extent of. Despite this, he can still use it with decent competency should the need ever arise.

Weaknesses: Ah yes. His folly.

Due to his upbringing and choice of idol, he starts off being quite haughty, believing himself to be intellectually superior to those around him. This pretentious attitude gives people a negative impression of him, which only gets exasperated when he gets defensive about it.

It leads him to be downright disrespectful or dismissive of other people’s feelings and desires, which gets him into trouble. ✨ And does wonders for his relationships ✨ /j

While he does grow out of this a bit from being around good influences, his pride does still reer it’s ugly head from time to time.

Throughout the arc, a new feeling starts to worm itself in and replace his confidence. A feeling he doesn’t like.

He becomes afraid that he’s becoming close with these people. That he’s falling in love with Rivet. That he has something else he cares about now besides Eggman and his goal.

It’s all new to him, and he doesn’t know how to deal with it. He struggles to hold meaningful relationships as a result, due to his fear of rejection from moral differences and losing sight of his goal. He can’t decide what to do, and self sabotages himself multiple times, only burying himself deeper into a hole.

He also tends to lose his nerve if spooked, and accidentally slips up secrets when engaged in one of his many excited and loose-tongued rambles.

History: Starpoint!Starline grew up as a bright-eyed, well-off, upper-class child with a great brilliance and interest in science.

He was raised in the ways of nobility and class, not having much in the way of a relationship with his parents, or any friends beyond what their status demanded of him.

As a result, Starline was rather isolated, spending large amounts of time with only his studies and inventions to keep him company. (Which is where his habit of talking to himself spawned from.)

Then Eggman’s global broadcast aired on TV, and like a flip had been switched, Starline became spellbound. For here was a genius of his caliber, unafraid to use his genius to shape the world into how he saw fit.

Starline was enthralled, and despite his parent’s distaste, he quickly fell down into the rabbit hole of investigation, becoming a huge fan of Eggman’s legend. (His version of a Saturday Morning Cartoon hero.) It was at that point Starline decided to dedicate his career to following in the man’s footsteps.

His new role model got him into even more trouble with society, and he was even ostracized from his family’s namesake as he was bringing shame to them. But he thought nothing of it, believing that he was just doing as they raised him to do, and that one day, they would thank him for it in the end.

Additional Information:

Starline’s Character Arcs: (Spoilers Ahead!)

⭐️ Starpoint Squad Arc:

Downfall Arc: Check back later!

Restoration Arc: Check back later!

Likes: Dr. Eggman, science, technology, robotics, the arcane, upper class, theater, Broadway, dressing and looking sharp, the Atmos cafeteria’s sandwiches, being appreciated and respected, peace and quiet, classical music, tea, being in charge of a situation, the Starpoint Squad (eventually), good food and intelligent company.

Dislikes: Sonic, being interrupted in the middle of a project, bullies, people who waste his time, loud jamming music, having little to no control over a situation, being put down by anyone

Last updated 3/15/24

#sonic #sonic idw #dr starline #unnamed au #starpoint au #starline the platypus #character bio #character info #this will be updated the further into the AU i get.#but i dont want to spoil EVERYTHING yet #even though Ive already spoiled quite a bit #my art #if you have any questions let me know #i'm genuinely upset i can't figure out how to center the post #the pictures being off center is bugging me so much X'D #while everyone’s enjoying super bowl I’m over here cackling like a gremlin #Starline's character had such an emphasis on his need to be recognized by Eggman. Even post-henchman era. I can't not explore that more.#im gonna go hide under the couch now

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elisedonut · 2 months

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Trans boy Percy can be a lot of fun

just a lot of people have a tendency to make it something he comes out about Pre-canon and that it changes nothing

while I'm over here like I firmly believe that Molly would not have continued having kids if she thought she already had a daughter

and i think she would be annoying as hell about him figuring himself out I just think she would be so disrespectful about it

Molly would be a "but your ruining yourself! you are my baby girl!" while crying type of parent and I believe that in my heart

She would guilt trip Percy like crazy about it while feeling 100% like she's doing the right thing.

Do I think that maybe she would realize after a few years that she's being absolutely terrible? I mean like I would hope so

#percy weasley #Now Post-war Trans-girl Percy finally letting herself be free and no longer caring about what her family thinks?#is amazing and i love that concept #i feel like every non shipping post i could want to make about Percy is one i've already made at this point #ik I've talked about trans!Percy before but im going to do it again #Tw: transphobia #trans!percy weasley #I firmly believe Molly would continue introducing Percy as her daughter im sorry #i just think she would be transphobic i don't think she would spew like truelly heinous things like hoping Percy dies or anything #but i do think she would never respect Percy's pronouns or only respect them when she's happy with him #does this mean i think transboy!Percy can't be done? no obviously not that is dumb you can do whatever you want #its just most depictions i've seen have been very the Weasleys all accept him or at the worst the twins make like one joke and drop it #when i just don't think it would go like that personally #though wish fulfillment is also just a good time so *shrug*#This has been hiding in my drafts for who knows how long so I'm freeing her #molly weasley critical

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angel-of-sweet-revenge · 5 hours

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Normal people: vent about their feelings in a diary or blog post

Me: makes a whole ass zine at nearly midnight

#okay so i was CONSIDERING the vent zine #and then um something and then i was like “yeah no i cant rest until i get this out”#so i sat down and made this vent zine that's gonna embarrass me next year lmao #am i okay? ... actually I'm trying to be okay now #I'm just questioning something about someone #sorry to keep referring back to That Thing it's just been on my mind a lot #even before that vent post for a while now i was wondering if everything really was okay. if it was making me okay.#because i dont want to be selfish and abandon someone when they need me. I've been abandoned before.#but it's been going on like this for a while and I'm taking too much of it in #i cant even see their name on my phone or like receive a message without going through mini heart attacks wondering if something's wrong-#-again and if i need to hear another drama again #it kind of feels uncomfortable as well in a way. like they're oversharing and that I'm not supposed to be knowing so much #maybe that's just me though. maybe im automatically distancing myself without realising it?#i dont know i just want to hide and not be so... involved i guess?#i think maybe I'm a person more suited to lighter friendships. or maybe there's been so much heaviness that this is just too much now #i dont know. i dont hate them at all but i wouldn't be too upset if they ghosted me (maybe thats just how i feel right now)#i dont know if I'm running away from my problems instead of trying to fix them or something #i have fixed them before. i have communicated and fixed issues before but this time i just cant anymore #okay that's enough rambling. it's midnight #mind you my zine does look pretty good. for a zine made out of a single sheet of paper and written/doodled on in black pen with a lil red #alright that's enough from me now. if you've stayed for this long go drink some water-i know you havent hydrated in ages #(says the woman who hasnt hydrated either-)

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lovebloods · 27 days

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#hiding this in the tags bc it’s kind of embarrassing and i need to get it off my chest #and i could journal about it but i just want someone to see me #sorry for being cringe <333 #but i don’t know what the hell i am like i don’t know if i’m even nonbinary anymore and that scares me like being nonbinary felt like coming #home after a long trip #and now i’m having all these thoughts about wanting to be a man? like near tears rn bc i want to be a guy but then when i think of actually #being a guy i freak out a bit #bc i like being seen as feminine too and i know that there are feminine men and they get treated so terribly #and i feel like all the men i see that i want to be like or look like are white! why don’t i see any black trans men like i feel so alone #and i’m scared to look/be openly trans bc there’s so much violence against people like us that it feels safer to just cosplay as a cis woman #even though i’m not #like i don’t want to be a boy but i want to be one and i absolutely don’t want to be a girl but i’d like to be seen as someone sometimes #it’s all very confusing #AND like i know i’m biromantic like im attracted to all genders and people #but im like? am i on the ace spectrum #bc i have a low sex drive am often sex repulsed and will sometimes ‘test’#myself to see if im sexually attracted to people and most of the time it’s like #it’s like meh not really but sometimes im like sure but that’s rarer and rarer these days?? and like. tmi here but i jerk off and enjoy it #so i can’t be asexual right?? i tried looking it up but the articles just confused me #but then i also am like with the right person if i had a connection to them i wouldn’t mind having sex with them! but like. then i think #about actually having to be in a relationship and i’m like gross no but i think that’s just relationship trauma and fear of being #vulnerable #and like i know i don’t HAVE to have a label on my gender or sexuality but for me personally it helps to know What i am #and and i love butches so so so much and if i’m a man how can i love butches? like #it’s all so confusing #i feel like i’m 14 and going through puberty again

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todayisafridaynight · 10 months

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if i think bout ichi going to jiro kasuga's grave and arakawa accompanying him Maybe At Least Once i just might explode

#snap chats #hi everyone. coping with my reality. plus it is fathers day tomorrow #ill save all THAT rambling after The Real Meat alright lemme get that juice out the way #anyway no i was just having an idle thought with fathers day coming up #an i just thought of like. Just-Got-Here ichi wantin to see his Relatively-Recently-Deceased's dad's grave #maybe arakawa wanted to ask ichi to do somethin on X day and ichi visibly is just 😬#obvi he tries to brush it off like Oh Its Nothing Sir Haha :) but arakawa's A Dad.#and grew up with a troubled childhood alright he knows when someones hiding something so he encourages ichi to tell him the truth #such comes The Bean Spillin an ichi's just 'remember how i said my dad died yeah i wanted to visit him that day 👉👈 '#followed up by the obligatory backpedaling But Its Fine I Can Do Another Day ! No Worries ! etc etc #so pleaaasse cut to arakawa making a 'deal' with ichi in that he can go that day but only if he could tag along #ichi's a great kid it's worth visiting the guy who raised him right #im gonna throw up if arakawa just gets a Funny Feeling during their visit yk what i mean #he just feels Especially grateful for jiro and what he did for ichi- doesnt exactly know why maybe ichi really is just that good of a kiddo #im gona make myself throw UP oh my GOD. crying dying etc etc #if you see me write or draw anything after this no you dont #speaking of though Personal Ramble Time i knew i shouldnt have eaten until later this is my karma <- thats not how karma works #i try not to eat in the evening and the time i do unprompted BOOM mother's home. screaming crying yelling #i still had things i wanted to do upstairs too gdi now i gotta wait til monday or like. 2AM ☠️☠️☠️#ok thats all byyyyye im gonna cope with my cringe family situation with projection 👋

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mejomonster · 1 year

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i think in my indulgent Demon immortal Fei Du au, I’m going to make him part fox spirit on his mom’s side. Just because priest made SO many references in Silent Reading to fox spirits being with humans, and to Tales from a Chinese Studio stories. It wouldn’t be right if my boy Fei Du wasn’t actually a sneaky fox too ToT

#silent reading #lb #mejo writing #i think partly Silent Reading really AWOKE my urge to want to write fanfic #well 1 cause im procrastinating writing original stuff #but 2 because i really GET the characterizations #its a very satisfying feeling when i can read something and Predict VERY well what characters think and are hiding and Would Do #it tells me that first of all the writer wrote VERY CONSISTENT ARCS which is just so satisfying to me as characterization is my #single most valued trait in stories. if characterization is bad or even just has some Key Weak points its the main make or break for me.#then it also tells me i in particular GET the characters really well. well enough to play with them and predict their future or X scene or X #past. and thats just really fun to me.#like i love dmbj and i do suspect maybe i get xiaoge... but also i still feel i OUGHT to read ALL novels before i feel confident i truly kno #him well enough to accurately depict. whereas fei du and luo wenzhou and tao ran? within 20 chapters i clocked how it was going to shift and #change. they surpassed my expectations in a few areas but generally tended toward the arc i expected. so i can generally rely on probably #knowing them well enough to write them fairly.#however the big But here is. i do suspect fei du has one more big reveal left in him post chapter 141 #i feel like theres Still an aspect of him we the reader dont fully know. and i feel i cant write HIM in too much depth like a big long fic #or future fic or speculative au fic. until i see what his final secret ias #past fic is fine though - i grasp him pretty well that angle wise ToT and present wise. its just i suspect #hes got a few traits to him luo wenzhou hasnt reacted to and acclimated to yet

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piplupod · 11 months

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there is a terrible awkwardness to this reconnecting w old friend who we will get to see when we go on this trip and trying to organize plans w them because i am... not sure if they remember or KnowTM that my mother is abusive fhdgjkl

it is just so uncomfortable being like "wow that is a great idea but i just have to run every part of this past my mother first to make sure its okay (even though im an adult and you are too but she is the puppetmaster around here and i am trying to keep myself as safe as possible especially while on the trip and in such close quarters with her :))))) and also i would hate for you to have to be put in an uncomfortable position if she showed her abusive tendencies around you even tho ur outside the family which is rare but when it happens it is really fucked up and uncomfortable for everyone involved except her) !"

#i am just so tired of hiding the abuse fhdsjkl i am so fucking tired of it #i dont know how to tell people though #like. thats not rly something u can just drop out of nowhere. oh hey my mother is my abuser btw #so please behave when you are around her and dont say anything sus or let anything loose that would endanger me okay thanks bye!#ofc im not going to like. ask ppl to ''''''behave''''' or whatever. i just. dont tell them anything i dont want getting back to my mother #which... puts a strain on friendships. bc im constantly censoring and monitoring myself.#also if i dont think they will '''''''behave'''''''' then i just. dont get to spend time w them in case my mother shows up fdsjkl #i am SO fucking tired of all of this fdsjkl idk what to do about it though #i am so trapped and so stuck and so tired and frustrated and its all so fucking unfair and stupid and shitty and exhausting #yadda yadda sorry fsdjkl i am just. argh. fdsjkl i will stop now though #pippen needs 2nd breakfast #abuse tw

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du-hjarta-skulblaka · 2 years

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Hhnnggg and there's the smash back to reality

My mum spending all day yesterday trying to play nice and get me to open up and then today tearing into me for doing my washing after saying I should do my washing

#apparently i did too much bc theres no room indoors to hang it up #as i was in the process of hanging it up ourside which i ahoildnt habe done bc it could rain #even though it hasnt and its windy enough things dry faster and im sitting outside anyway so i would notice if it was #its just. god its jarring #with me yesterday admiting how hard it is for me to be around her because my entire sense of identity hinges on her approval #and how any percieved failure digs into me #and her being like maybe u should try doing something small wrong on purpose:)))#like??? i straight up laughed when she said that #if i know ill get in trouble for doing something wrong accidentslly why in the everloving fuck would i do it on purpose?#ugh im okay though im. okay im just #not going back inside for a while.#hiding in my wall of shirts

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carrotpiss · 5 months

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This is a bunch of sad lost and confused and frustrated and lonely sludge, advise not reading