...

‘M back from the dead

I had absolute filth for dreams but my favorite was being under anesthesia and in that dream i was with Ryomen and it was so soft

And he was just running his hands over my side/back and i could clearly feel the lights scratch of his nails while I cuddled into his chest 🥹

And he was saying “You’re doing so well pretty girl, such a good job. Mm? Looking at you sleeping so peacefully, but it’s time to wake up. You’ll be a beautiful mother one day, look at you.” Then i got the sweetest kiss and woke up 😭

I’ll never be complete again 🥹 they took my organ out btw

I cant remember the last time someone told me they loved me.

i relapsed but i’m in love

i’m going to a psych clinic next week, i’m scared it won’t heal me

because if it doesn’t, i’m already d3ad

crying in the shower about the life you desperately want but you’ll never get to have <<<

“𝘐𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶’𝘳𝘦 𝘢 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘬 𝘰𝘧 𝘢𝘳𝘵, 𝘐’𝘮 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰𝘰 𝘤𝘭𝘰𝘴𝘦. 𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘴𝘦𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘳𝘶𝘴𝘩 𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘰𝘬𝘦𝘴.”

my whole life is falling to pieces again and i don’t think i have the strength to pick it up this time

literally me-

I want to feel. Feel something within me. I want this deep void in me to be filled. I want to know what the the feeling of contentment is like. I want to know what its like to wake up everyday and be happy to live.

Kitty, what do you wanna be when you grow up? 🐱🐶💕

I hate my job. I hate it so much. Wheres my sugar daddy steddie? I need them!

This also applies to kid's shows. Sometimes we need the childhood innocence and reminiscent years to distract us from the increasingly difficult world we are living in.

Im feeling sad because of the consequences of playing the game all day for the past week.

My dad came in our room ( I share a room with my brother ) and started yelling "no one would ever guess you have important exams this year with the work you get done, wake up and go study" ( we were still in bed and very sick ). We go to take our break fast ( my head is killing me and I feel like I might just fall down ). He then starts yelling again, saying that we never do anything around the house and shit ( when actually *he* does almost nothing, and we do most the work ). My brother then speaks up and say that we always do all the dishes that we always clean up the kitchen, the living room, the bathroom and the toilet ( our flat is small we only have 2 rooms, a living room, a kitchen, bathroom and toilet ) and that we are just sick. Dad starts yelling even louder and tells him to shut up to never talk when he's talking and stuff like that, while being dangerously close to him. At this point I'm crying and I fell like my head might as well just explode so I beg him to stop screaming but he tells me to shut tf up or else he'll hit me.

Then my mom tells us that "he's just mad, everyone can be angry from time to time", "it shouldn't affect you this much" and then just start talking about studies

I'm sick of this

I wanna ran away

I wanna run away so bad. Take my brother with me and run away, but literally have nowhere to go

And even though I know that in two years I'll go university, my brother, my little brother will have to stay 2 more years *alone* with *them*. That terrifies me

I can't do this anymore

I can't do this anymore, I just can't