Tumgik
#i have no idea which last name is actually bowsers
itschrisboys · 1 year
Text
did anyone say, SUPER MARIO HEADCANONS?
also i just noticed i have polls now
wario's real name is wallace. people started calling him wario as a joke after realizing how much he resembled mario. wallace was super annoyed at first, but now he's mildly amused by the whole thing.
likewise, waluigi's real name is michael. when wario first mentioned he had a younger twin, people started joking that his brother's name was waluigi. michael found it pretty funny from the get-go, and started leaning into the joke.
super crowns are used as a symbol of status in the mario universe. because of this, the royalty only appear human while wearing their crowns. peach is actually a toad, daisy is actually a piranha plant, and rosalina is actually a luma.
bowser and bowser junior are a subspecies of koopa known as a fire koopa. while rare, fire koopas aren't exclusively nobles/royalty, and vice versa.
bowser junior was conceived from a one night stand, and left on the castle doorstep in the middle of the night. a dna test confirmed he was bowser's kid, but they couldn't find his biological mother.
the koopalings aren't legally bowser's children, but he's basically adopted them anyway. most of them come from rough homes, and the others dont come from homes at all. bowser looked at these struggling kids, and his fatherly instincts kicked in and he essentially said "mine now"
the "stork" isn't actually how babies are conceived in the mushroom kingdom, it's just an adoption service.
mario and luigi were born in the mushroom kingdom. their (adoptive) parents (born in italy) took them to brooklyn after the shroob invasion, and they grew up not knowing about the mushroom kingdom. they only found out their origins upon coming to the mushroom kingdom years later, and being recognized by their old babysitter, toadsworth.
mario and luigi's birth parents were from new donk city.
mario's favorite food is spaghetti, and luigi teases him relentlessly for being an italian stereotype.
peach is actually closeted aroace. she's a very physically affectionate person (ie cheek kisses and hugs), and bakes cakes for her friends a lot. she didn't realize that that accidentally sent romantic signals to mario until much later, and has no idea how to clear things up without outing herself (she's not ready to come out yet) now that everyone seems to think they're an item.
peach almost ditching mario on the moon was due to the fact that she was panicking about potentially being outed, and therefore didn't realize he wasn't on the ship (she didn't find out she almost left mario there until later, and she profusely apologized when he told her)
bowser's parents died when he was really young (like, infant young), and he was raised by kammy and kamek. he refers to them as his parents sometimes.
likewise, peach was raised by toadsworth.
peach is actually the queen of the mushroom kingdom, but she likes the alliteration of "princess peach", so she uses that as her title.
rosalina still refers to herself as a princess because she hasn't finished grieving for her mother yet, and doesn't want to feel like she's replacing her.
unlike the other royalty, daisy's parents are alive and well, which is why she still has the title of princess.
kammy and kamek are in a long-term queerplatonic relationship.
mario doesn't start dating pauline until after peach eventually comes out of the closet.
luigi is crushing super hard on prince peasley, but he's too awkward to say anything, and peasley has some self esteem issues that lead him to believe that luigi is only fawning over him because he's the prince, so doesn't realize luigi has a crush. mario keeps trying to matchmake the two, and is super frustrated that none of his attempts are working, despite that fact that they're obviously into each other
wario and waluigi care about each other a lot, but that doesn't stop them from having some extreme sibling rivalry. they would absolutely beat the shit out of each other for the last cookie, then be chilling and watching tv together not 10 minutes later. the cain instinct is strong with these two.
not too long after the incident on the moon, daisy decides she's had enough of bowsers shit, and beats him up while still wearing a dress and high heels. bowser stops going after peach, but its not so much because he's scared of daisy so much as it is that he's incredibly impressed by her and wants to get on her good side because he may or may not have developed a crush.
bowser and daisy do eventually start dating.
143 notes · View notes
koopaling-au · 16 days
Text
Kamek & The Koopaling Quotes [I felt an urge to do this too]
Kamek: (teaching a very important lesson)
Lemmy: Did you hear what happened to Wendy?
Iggy: No, what?
Lemmy: Well, she-
Kamek: I'll wait.
Lemmy: Okay, then wait then.
Iggy: (snickers)
Kamek: Guys, I do not have the patience right now.
Lemmy: Then find it.
Kamek: Lemmy, you are on the last straw.
Lemmy: Then buy more.
...
Kamek: And then when these two chemicals mix, yada yada yada~
Lemmy: (raises hand)
Kamek: (sighs) Yes, Lemmy?
Lemmy: Can I go to the restroom?
Kamek: I don't know, CAN you?
Lemmy: MAY I go to the restroom?
Kamek: Lunch was five minutes ago. Why didn't you go then?
Lemmy: Why do all adults think we have this on and off switch in our bladder?! I didn't have to GO then.
...
Kamek: Today we are going over fire safety.
Wendy: Again?
Kamek: Yup.
Ludwig: If there's a fire, I'm jumping out the window, and you can't stop me.
Kamek: No, that's not a safe way to exit the building. We will leave the classroom quietly and calmly.
Roy: You want us to stay calm, while we are basically running for our lives?
Kamek: We need to set a good example for the younger ones.
Koopa Kid: That'll be hard to do if we are all dead.
Kamek: (ignores) Once we get to the exit, we will leave in alphabetical order.
Koopa Kid: How the fuck does that matter?!
Kamek: Language~
Roy: It's fine with me since Junior isn't first for once.
Iggy: Then I'd be first.
Roy: Dammit.
Kamek: Actually, Junior is first since his name is Bowser Junior.
Iggy: OMFG-
Lemmy: Welp, bye Wendy!
Wendy: This is so stupid.
Kamek: FINE-youngest leaves first since they have a longer life then the ones that are older.
Junior: Bye, Ludwig!
Ludwig: Actually Roy would be last; since I'm jumping out the window.
Kamek: Why-
...
Kamek: Now that everyone is settled from the fire safety, we will be going over lockdown safety.
Koopa Kid: Eh, grab a gun and shoot them in the face.
Kamek: Erm, no.
Ludwig: I'm still jumping out the window. I'm not dealing with this.
Iggy: I'm joining you.
Kamek: No, we are hiding in the corner until we are claimed to be safe.
Wendy: What are we playing hide-and-seek?
Larry: What if he comes in?
Roy: ...We'll let Koopa Kid handle it.
Lemmy: Or sacrifice Junior. Whatever comes first.
Junior: ...NO.
Kamek: I will disarm him before he or she shoots us.
Koopa Kid: You can't do shit.
Kamek: Language.
Ludwig: Actually, I think we should all just start picking up our chairs and desks and throw it at the shooter to knock them unconscious. After we do that we can disarm him, and steal his wallet: because he doesn't deserve it. Once they wake up, we threaten him with the gun, and wait until further notice from the police. Hopefully.
Everyone: ...
Roy: The fuck did he just say?
Wendy: We aren't writing an essay here.
Morton: Uh, Morton agrees!! :)
...
Kamek: (walks in ready to teach Literature) You've got to be serious.
Ludwig: (writing a ten-page essay about his book)
Roy: (about to light the book on fire)
Morton: (can't read, just looking at the pictures)
Koopa Kid: (ripping pages out of the book, and crumpling them up into balls and attempting to throw them into the trash can, which is why there is paper everywhere.)
Wendy: (threw the book out the window)
Iggy: (reading the book upside down)
Lemmy: (eating the paper)
Larry: (pretending to read but zoning out)
Junior: (the one actually reading)
...
Kind of got this idea from @splatoondetective
11 notes · View notes
itsamenickname · 11 months
Note
No, wait, hold on, i am interested on the Rapunzel Bowuigi Au!
Peach as Mother Gothel?? And Bowser (Blade) is a thief?? MARIO IS THE KING LOOKING FOR HIS LOST BROTHER? I NEED to know more!!!!
I am actually really excited to hear you say that anon because this ask, this post right here, officially marks the 100th post I've made since joining this site 3.5 months ago! :D (I know it may not seem like much to a lot of people (which is perfectly fine), but to me, this milestone would not have been possible without each and every single one of you taking the time to read my weird Bowuigi ideas & story and liking them enough to where y'all want to ask me questions, follow me, and/or are even inspired by me to make your own fanfic or artwork. 😊❤️)
Anyway, I hope you guys are excited as much as I am for the official first chapter/post of my version of the Bowuigi Rapunzel AU!
Enjoy! 😃
(Adding a cut here because this post is going to be long.)
**************
So our story begins long, long ago (long before Mario, Luigi, and Bowser were born) in a far away place called the Mushroom Kingdom. And in the Mushroom Kingdom lived a kind, smart, and selfless princess named Peach. Now, to say that Princess Peach was good-looking or cute is a complete understatement. No, Princess Peach was by far the most beautiful princess in the entire galaxy. Hundreds, no, thousands of people from around the world would come visit the Mushroom Kingdom in hopes of getting the chance to see Peach’s beauty, even if it was just for one second. Men would try to ask for her hand in marriage, women would often envy her because of how perfect she was, and children would wish upon the stars every night to be just like her when they grow up.
But everything soon changed when multiple new kingdoms started to form not too far from the Mushroom Kingdom.
Now at first, Peach wasn’t bothered by the formation of all these new kingdoms. In fact, she was actually rather excited about these changes because this created the possibility of meeting new people, whether they were commoners or royalty (for a while, she had often thought about hosting a ball to welcome these new people & kingdoms in hopes of meeting her Prince Charming).
But things took a drastic turn for our dear princess when she noticed her citizens moving out of her kingdom in order to live at these new kingdoms.
And I’m not talking about one or two citizens moving out of the Mushroom Kingdom. I’m talking about hundreds of citizens.  
And that…that terrified Peach.
Because she feared that her citizens moving out of her kingdom meant that they didn’t love her anymore.
So with this new fear/realization, Peach started to make some…unsettling changes. Now at first, the changes were pretty small, like guards surrounding the Mushroom Kingdom’s perimeters, but it quickly got way out of hand when she not only started to refuse any kind of travelers from even entering her kingdom, but also required her citizens to have special permission from her in order to even step foot out of the Mushroom Kingdom.
These changes lasted for about 3 months before the Mushroom Kingdom citizens decided that they’ve had enough.
So in the middle of a dark and stormy night, all of the Mushroom Kingdom citizens joined forces and overthrew Princess Peach.
But the citizens didn’t kill Peach, at least not right away. They wanted to make her execution a big spectacle to show everyone that commoners are just as, if not, more, powerful than a royal when they band together as one.
But on the night before her execution, Peach escaped and ran away to a nearby forest.
Now when the citizens found out about the escape, they immediately began their search for the ex-princess. Hours turned into days, days turned into weeks, and weeks even turned into months, but the citizens would always come back empty-handed. It was only when the clock struck the 2nd year since Peach escaped that the citizens eventually gave up on looking for her because they figured that there was no way she could survive from just living off in the forest.
But she did and do you want to know how?
Because not long after she ran away, Peach not only found a tower she could live in, but she also found a gold rose.
A special gold rose that could heal the sick and injured.
So now that we have a really good idea of Peach’s origin story, the next thing is to figure out Mario and Luigi’s origin story (since you can’t have a Rapunzel story without Mother Gothel locking Rapunzel up in a tower for years).
Well lucky for y’all, I actually have a pretty interesting origin story for them as well.
So we start off the brothers’ origin story not long after the citizens pretty much exiled Peach from the Mushroom Kingdom. Now here, this is where they have two options: they could either turn the Mushroom Kingdom into a democracy, or try the monarchy approach again, but have two regular commoners become royals as a way to bring the royals and the citizens closer together.
It was a tough decision, but the citizens eventually chose the latter option.
And do y’all want to know who were the lucky chosen commoners?
It was two of Mario and Luigi’s ancestors.
So we time skip to hundreds and hundreds of years later where Mario and Luigi’s parents are now king and queen of the Mushroom Kingdom. Now here, life is actually pretty good for everyone. The Mushroom Kingdom has quite a few good alliances, the king and queen are beloved by their citizens, everything at that moment in time looked bright for everyone.
Well, not quite.
You see, one of the most difficult challenges the king and queen had to face was having children. Now, it wasn’t that they didn’t want to have a child, they really did, but whenever they would try to conceive, the queen just couldn’t get pregnant.
But on one winter day, life would forever change for the entire Mushroom Kingdom.
Because after countless attempts, the queen was finally with child.
But the kingdom’s happiness would only last for a few months because this is when a plague hits the Mushroom Kingdom.
The first to fall victim to the plague was an old farmer on one spring morning. Now at first, no one was worried about this. Everyone knew that the old farmer had a tenancy to get sick during this time of year, so it wasn’t anything to really be worried about.
However, what surprised everyone was when the old farmer’s wife (who had one of the best immune systems in the entire kingdom) became sick the very next day.
No one was as surprised as the farmer’s neighbor when she found both the old farmer and his wife dead just 24 hours later.
So as you guys can probably imagine, the plague quickly spreads throughout the entire Mushroom Kingdom. All the doctors did everything they could to find a cure for this unknown virus, but none of them were successful.
Things especially took a bad turn for the kingdom when the queen caught the plague 8 months into her pregnancy.
So immediately after the queen caught the plague, the king and the doctors went into high gear of finding a cure. Just a few short days after the tragic event, one of the doctors found an old passage about a golden rose that could heal the sick and injured. While the doctor was unsure on whether the rose still existed, the king didn’t care as he ordered his best soldiers to search for this special rose.
It took the soldiers about one week before they finally found that golden rose. And once they found that said rose, they rushed back to the castle to make the cure for the queen and for the sick citizens.
And after 12 long and painful hours, the doctors successfully made the cure and the queen and all the surviving plagued citizens were cured from the dreaded plague.
So two weeks later, the queen gave birth to Mario and Luigi. However, the thing that shocked everyone was that Luigi, the younger twin, had blond hair. While this confused, and slightly scared, the king and queen, the doctor quickly reassured them that the reason for Luigi’s unique hair color was because of the gold rose. The doctor theorized that the rose’s powers only rooted into Luigi’s DNA because only he was truly affected by the queen’s sickness. Why the sickness didn’t affect Mario, the doctor wasn’t sure.
This did not matter to the king and queen. After trying for years, they finally had beautiful healthy children they could love and cherish and the kingdom had two new princes. It was a wonderful occasion that no one could possibly ruin.
Except for one person.
So on the night of the twins’ birth, Peach broke into the castle and snuck into the twins’ room. She started to sing that special song she had to use before in order to use the gold rose’s powers, and to her surprise and excitement, Luigi’s hair started to glow. Without any hesitation, Peach carefully and quickly cut a piece of Luigi’s hair, but was shocked to discover that the cut hair and the hair piece in her hand turned into a dark brown color.
Peach was really conflicted. She wanted, no, needed, the rose’s powers in order to stay young, but the problem was that it was rooted into Luigi’s DNA.
It was at that moment that she knew what she needed to do.
Without a single hesitation, Peach kidnapped Luigi and disappeared into the night.
It wasn’t until a few hours later that a guard checked in on the princes and realized that Luigi was missing.
As soon as the king and queen were informed, they immediately sent out as many solders as they could to find Luigi and his kidnapper. Hundreds of soldiers scattered across the lands in hopes of finding the lost prince, but as weeks turned into months and months turned into years, there were no clues or leads on Luigi or Peach’s whereabouts.
But unbeknownst to everyone, hidden deep in a nearby forest was a hidden tower.
A tower where Peach raised Luigi as her son.
32 notes · View notes
egg-emperor · 11 months
Note
You think eggman and Bowser make out secretly while they were in London?
YES of course, I can imagine Eggman thinking of the trip of sightseeing around London with Bowser as a date in the back of his mind the whole time because it was nice and casual and fun, just like how he prefers his actual dates and it's a great time. But he slowly realizes it feels like something is suddenly different between them now, like they're a couple. He thinks about how strangers might even wonder if they are but he doesn't let it worry him, he's more fascinated by the what if of it being true.
Eggman has been into Bowser for a while but hasn't revealed it or even fully admitted it to himself as he was still trying to figure out his feelings. But with him always having a thing for big scary monstrous beings like the eldritch horrors he tries to awaken and harness and the interesting thrill he gets from it, meeting a monstrous beastly guy like Bowser who can actually speak to him for the first time, relate in some ways, and get along decently with made it hard not to have a thing for him.
While he enjoys the sights in London, he also spends time looking at Bowser instead with feelings of desire. And while he's enjoying the fun conversation they have about how they'd take over and repurpose the landmarks they sightsee, he also keeps thinking about Bowser in interesting ways, like he'd already been doing uncontrollably now and then when watching him doing training and partaking in events in the Olympics too, as seeing a big beastly guy show off his strength and abilities excites him.
They end the fun trip by going for some drinks and when Eggman becomes a bit tipsy, he just keeps focusing on Bowser and thinking about him even more and more unfiltered. He keeps getting lost in his eyes and losing focus of everything else as he finds himself thinking about how attractive he finds him. Bowser starts to notice as Eggman starts to struggle to pay attention but he's just confused by it as he doesn't seem like he's bored and he was super immersed in the conversation a minute ago.
Eggman is slowly getting closer to him as they talk while looking at the view from the balcony they were hanging out on. Bowser makes a comment about how the view is beautiful and the trip was fun, and the slightly drunk Eggman finally blurts his thoughts out like "you are too, and I really enjoyed our date" and cuddles up to him. Bowser is like "what???" and Eggman blushes and laughs as he realized what he just said but then decides to take initiative and finally admit his interest in him.
Bowser isn't sure how to react and feel about Eggman describing the ways he'd been feeling for a while and what he finds attractive about him but he had been feeling something between them for some time too, like some sort of tension but he was a lot more oblivious to it than Eggman all along, as he was still focusing on Peach the most, as usual. But he also finds himself feeling quite flattered by his confession and starts seeing his new pal in a different light to know that he's secretly been into him like this.
He suddenly starts to entertain the idea of them getting together and blushes hard at the thought as he realizes he doesn't hate it. He also thinks about how, whenever Peach wasn't around, he did find his eyes going to Eggman and spending a good few minutes looking at his body and a few times he's mentally noted that he's nicely shaped both front and back (them peaches catch his eye) but he'd think of it as just being fascinated by his interesting shape that his name draws attention to.
But it was clearly more than that and now he finds himself taking that further as he thinks about how he wouldn't mind putting his hands on that body and feeling it up. He manages to say he thinks Eggman is quite handsome too, which surprises himself to say and delights Eggman, who doesn't hold back any more and goes in for the kiss at last. It's sloppy because they're both a little bit drunk but they both feel a spark just from the first quick smooch on the lips and everything changes from there.
When they pull away Eggman giggles and smiles so wide, sighing dreamily after how long he'd been wanting that. But Bowser starts to feel a little conflicted as his mind goes to Peach. Just as he begins to say "wait I can't, what about P-" Eggman puts a finger to his lips to hush him. He says that he should stop fretting about Peach for a while and just focus on the now, he's constantly been stressing about seeing her around and he wants him to just relax and have fun and he can help.
He says that he doesn't need to think about her right now because he's right here to give him a good time instead. Maybe if Bowser were totally sober and not all worked up and confused like this then he'd be a little more cross at Eggman for suggesting that Peach doesn't matter like that- but in this moment he's also tempted by Eggman offering himself to him like this, he's flattered because of how he never gets this kind of attention and willingness from Peach, it's nice to feel wanted.
Eggman's plan works and he continues to manage to seduce him further with his charm as he strokes his chin and says "so how about you stop worrying about her so me and you can have some fun together instead? ;)" Bowser hesitates a little more but slowly places his hands on Eggman's butt and loves how big and round it feels. They go in for another kiss, a deeper one with tongue this time. Eggman has a large tongue himself but Bowser's is much bigger and he enjoys how it feels in his mouth.
Bowser also squeezes Eggman's butt during it and they both love it and it gets them even more excited. They make out for a couple minutes, casually. They treat it like it's just like a couple of friends messing around and making out, who find each other really sexy but still, in a friend like way nonetheless lol. They're tipsy and it's messy but it feels good, they laugh and smile and can't help falling harder for each other. Eggman really likes this side of Bowser who has given into desire and wants fun just like he does.
Eggman likes how it feels scandalous and cheeky, making out on the balcony where anyone could look up and see them getting a bit naughty. While it's ideal to not get caught, he kind of likes the idea of people finding out that he's managed to seduce the guy who swore he'd get with a princess but currently has his tongue in another man's mouth and his hands on his butt. He's very excited by the thrill of that and proud of his charm successfully seducing another handsome guy to mess around with.
And when their fun little session ends, they go back to their hotel and Eggman insists on sharing his huge bed with him. He gets extra cuddly and flirty with him as it's finally his chance to really play it up now that they're somewhere quiet and alone. Bowser is worked up all over again but finds himself unable to resist pulling him in to feel him up and kiss him again. And they're so deep in it now with their minds are clouded with desire and tipsiness that they go all the way without even thinking too much 👀
But I can't get into all that here on my sfw lol
Eggman enjoys keeping it a secret, being cheeky with teasing him in public and tempting him until they get alone and Bowser finally snaps and does something to him immediately in private. He suddenly can't stop thinking about how much likes Eggman, maybe even more than Peach. :O Especially how whenever he does mope over her, Eggman cheers him up with his peaches hehe. They enjoy messing around and kissing and even get a bit dirty in slightly secluded areas in public places and love the thrill.
They have a lot of fun with their fling the whole time they're at London and when they reconnect for the next Olympics, they do it all again!
And that's the story of how Eggman GOT SOME from Bowser for the first time. Oops you just prompted me to drop a whole concept I've daydreamed about a lot, you're welcome XD 🥚💜🐢
28 notes · View notes
blackhakumen · 7 months
Text
Mini Fanfic #1127: Mishima's Shoebox Collection (SSBU X Tekken)
5:45 p.m. at Mishima Zaibatsu Headquarters.........
Kazuya: (Stands Behind a Closed Door) Gentlemen, ladies, allow me to introduce you all to our latest business brand that could potentially help reach the Zaibatsu's name to greater lengths than it already has
The members of League of Villains' (And Zelda's) eyes begins to widens in pure awe as the door opens, revealing a room filled in the brim with brand new and accesible shoes sitting on each shelves inside. The bright, shiny atmosphere of the room alone was more than enough to peak almost everyone's attention.
Ganondorf: (The Only One Who In't as Impressed as the Other) You're starting up your own shoe brand company
Kazuya: (Crosses his Arms With a Smirk on his Face) That's the idea, yes. I've always have a fondness with everything shoes related growing up. So I figured, how else will I gain more power and success to my multinational cooperation than to jump-start my own shoe brand. A Zaibatsu Shoe Brand, the name's a work in progress.
Ganondorf: (Rolls his Eyes) Of course it is......
Bowser: Hey, you don't mind if we try these shoes of yours, on ourselves, do ya?
Kazuya: (Steps Away From the Opened Door) Be my guess.
The gang cheers in rejoice as most of them (sans for Sephiroth, Hades, and Ganondorf who only walks behind) eagarly their way shoe filled room as they begin to check out and try out each pair that they find.
Bowser: (Smiles Brightly at the Pair of Brown Dress Shoes He's Wearing) Man, I am so glad I got dressed up for today. This looks perfect on me!
Hades: (Takes a Look at a Holes Filled Shoe He's Holding in his Hand) So these are one those crock shoes everyone keep yammering about....
Bowser: Yep. They been a hit for three to four years now. Or was it loner than that......
Hades: Uh-huh. (Tries the Crock On Before Looking at It Once More) And exactly why do they holes in them again?
Bowser: (Turns to Hades) To let your feet breathe a little? Either that or maker behind these things, wanted to make it more unique looking than the rest. Whatcha think of them so far?
Hades: (Gets Himself Up From a Chair He Was Sitting While Examining the Front and Back of the Shoe He's Wearing) Hmm.....It's weird looking, but comfy.....I suppose it wouldn't wearing them around every once in a while, so long as I don't have to those feet numbing flip flops again.......
Bowser: (Nodded in Agreement) Amen to that, brother.
Zelda: (Smiles Brightly at a Matching Shoes She and Mewtwo Are Wearing) These limited edition Triforce Shoes looks even more beautiful than the ones in Smash Town!~ Mewwy, we HAVE to get these while they're still on stock!~
Mewtwo: Agrred. I never felt more powerful than I already am right now.
Sephiroth: We couldn't agree more.
Zelda and Mewtwo turns to see the father and son duo showing off the matching Black Air Force Shoes they're wearing with Sephiroth letting out a sinister laugh and Pichu nodding his head while smirking.
Mewtwo: (Stares at Them With Deadpinned Look I his Eyes) We're halfway close to the end of the year ans I still fail to see why that Pichu sees Sephiroth, all of people, as a father figure.......
Zelda: (Smiles Sheepishly) At....least they're cute together. Kind of.
Ridley: (Eyes Widened in Genuine Surprise at What is in Front of Him) No way! You guys are actually selling these glass slippers?
Kazuya: No, they're rubber proof slippers actually. We originally planned on selling them as glass as first before backing out at the last second. (Starts Shaking his Head Before Walking to the Other Side of the Room) I do not have patience to go through another lawsuit right now........
Ridley: (Smiles Brightly) Works for me! (Takes the See-Through Rubber Slipper From Out of the Shelf, Gets Down on One Knee, amd Presents it to his Girlfriend in Front of Him Fpr you, mi'lady~
Dark Samus giggles softly before carefully putting her foot inside the slipper, which managed to fit on her pretty well.
Dark Samus: S-So......How does it look?
Ridley: (Gives Dark Sus a Smirk and a Two Finger Guns) Like a princess walking inside the ball room~
Dark Samus giggles once more while blushing at his boyfriend's cheesy compliment towards her.
Kazuya: (Rolls his Eyes at the Couple in the Mid Distance) ('Ugh') It's not even that clever of the compliment.....
Ganondorf: Well, what do you expect when you're selling a near replica of a shoe from some fairy tale story?
Kazuya: Fair point. (Turns to Ganondorf) Aren't you gonna find anything in here as well?
Ganondorf: (Crosses his Arms While Turning Away) ('Tch') And give you the satisfaction of getting rich off of my well earned cash? No thanks.
Kazuya: Really? (Pulls Up a Pair of Ancient Boots in the Palm of his Hands) Not even for these pair of boots well fit for an evil tyrant such as yourself.
Ganondorf: (Slowly Turns Back to Kazuya) You don't say......
Kazuya: (Simply Nodded) Yep. And since I'm feeling fairly generous today, I'll shorten the price and only charge you $35.00 for them. Sounds like a reasonable deal for you, king?
Ganondorf stares at Kazuya for a few seconds before ultimately taking out fifty dollar buck from his pants pocket and reluctantly gives it to Kazuya.
Ganondorf: This doesn't change anything between.
Kazuya: (Gives Ganondorf his Now Paid Boots Woth a Satisfied Smirk on his Face) Pleasure doing with you. You and everyone else are doing this cooperation at huge service today.
???: A cooperation you wrongfully stole......
Everyone in the room stop at what they were doing and turn their attention to an young man walking out of the elevator with his hairs looking....almost similar to Kazuya's.
???: From me.
Sephiroth: This is an interesting encounter.
Zelda: Wait.....Is that really......
Kazuya: (Crosses his Arms) Jin Kazama, my one and only mistake of an offspring. What brings you here to my lovely establishment?
Jin: (Glare Starts to Harden at his Own Father) I'm here to put an end to you and all the chaos you've brought into this city.
Kazuya: ('Heh') Real bold of you to think you have what takes to put me down that easily. And need I remind you that YOU'RE the cause a global warfare over your own petty desires?
Bowser: (Eyes Begins to Widened) Holy shit. Is he serious?
Hades: (Chuckles Evilly) Yeeeup! Once Jinny boy started taking over, the first and only thing he ever did in his run was put his very own universe into chaos. (Starts Smirking Smugly) Guess the apple didn't fall far from the tree in this mess of bloodline, now does it?
Ridley: Somehow I.....don't feel surprised by all of this. (Turns to Everyone Else) What about you guys?
Everyone: Nah/Nuh-uh/Nope./Pichu.
Ganondorf: This family is filled with crazy ass nut jobs.
Sephiroth: Like father, like son-
Jin: (Angrily Stomps his Foot on the Ground at Everyone Else in the Room) ENOUGH! I am NOTHING compared to this bastard, Heihachi or anyone else in his family but mines alone! I only did all of this in hopes in finding Azazel, destroy it, and put an end to my devil gene and this cursed bloodline forever.
Zelda: Uh-huh. And did it worked out in the end?
Jin: ..........('Sighs Heavily') No, it didn't. Apparently it wasn't enough to make the gene go away completely.
Bowser: So you basically put your own world on fire for nothing.
Mewtwo: Not one of your proudest moments, is it?
Jin: (Lowers his Head Down) It isn't. And I'm willing to take every bit of punishment and accountability that comes my way. (Looks Up and Glares at Kazuya) But first, I must do everything in my power to put you out of your misery for good this time.
Kazuya:You're more than welcome try and do so as many times as you want. You're only gonna set yourself up for failure. (Smirks Evilly) Or did you forget you already are one yourself on the day your mother left you only in this cold, cruel world.
Bowser/Ridley: Ooooh........
Zelda: He really went there, didn't he?
Mewtwo: (Shrugs) I've heard worst.
Jin: My mother risked her own life just to protect me, unlike yours who wanted you and Heihachi dead from very start.
Everyone (Except for Mewtwo and Sephiroth): ('Gasps')
Zelda: Is that true?
Hades: Yeah, apparently his mother was destined to sacrifice him and her husband for the greater good of the world or whatever type of goodie-goodie bullsh-
Kazuya angrily throws a chair directly towards Jin, in which he dodges it effortlessly, much to everyone's surprise.
Kazuya: WATCH WHAT YOU SAY ABOUT YOUR GRANDMOTHER, YOU INSIGNIFICANT BRAT! SHOW HER SOME RESPECT!
Jin: ('Tch') Respect? For the grandmother I barely even know? (Walks Dangerous Close to Kazuya) Or the woman who was willing end her own family's life for a clan that I recently know about from a few outside sources.
Kazuya: (Gritting his Teeth) Likely story. But did it ever occur to that your woman you BARELY know was murdered by the man who dares call himself her loving husband and my father? Has it ever occur to you that maybe, JUST MAYBE that her unexpected demise was one of the many things that scarred me throughout my childhood and continues to do so to tis VERY. FUCKING. DAY!
Jin: And you have my condolences. That still doesn't excuse her actions in the slightest and I believe this world will continue to be better off without her and Heihachi in it.
Kazuya: (Enraged) THE ONLY THING THIS WORLD WILL BE BETTER WITHOUT IS YOU!!!
Kazuya throws an electric surge punch towards Jin's face.....only for the offspring to catch it in time with red colored lightning starting to appear around his grip.
Jin: I should say the same for you as well, asshole.
Jin then uses his other hand to punch his father hard enough to send him flying towards the other side of the room before rushing in and attacking his father, starting the fight instantly.
Bowser: (Watxhes the Father and Son Duke it Out Along with Everyone Else) Well.....That was something to see unpacked in front of us.
Zelda: I know this family has problems, but I didn't think it would be THIS messy!
Mewtwo: I don't think amount of therapy will be enough to heal.this trainwreck.
Pichu: Pi......
Ganondorf: Well, whatever problems those two are having with one another is their business to have. (Takes his New Boots and Leave) I'm leaving.
Hades: Right behind you. (Notices the Crocks He's Still Wearing Before Forming a Small.Smirk on his Face and Following Behind Ganondorf) And I am taking these crocks with me.
Bowser: (Starts Rubbing The Back of his Head Back and Forth) Would ve a reeeeal shame to leave here without paying for- (Quickly Rishrs Out the Room With the New Shoes He's Wearing)
Ridley: (Picks his Girlfriend Pick on his Arms) Come on, babe, it's time to go. (Quickly Rushes Out the Room As Well)
Dark Samus: O-Okay.
Sephiroth: (Walks Out of the Room While Carrying Pichu in his Arm) Come, son. Let us show the world the essence of our Black Air Forces.
Pichu: (Smiles Brightly) Pichu!~
Zelda: (Eyes Widened in Complete Shock) What the heck! Are you guys seriously gonna steal those shoes without paying first!?
Mewtwo: Not really something to be surprised about. They're villains, remember?
Zelda: (Starts Looking For Money on her Purse) I know that! It's still wrong and we're not gonna follow their footsteps. (Chuckles a Bit) Get it? Foot- steps?
Mewtwo: ('Sigh') Yes, I get it. Clever.
Zelda: Thank you~ (Puts out a Cash of Money From her Purse) Okay, this is half our allowance, but I think a hundred is enough, right?
Mewtwo: (Shrugs) I suppose. Assuming he'll care enough to even notice it was here.
Zelda: I mean, I guess, but-
Hades: Princess! Mewwy! You two are coming or what!?
Mewtwo: (Growls and Glares at Hades in the Distance) I told you not to call me-
Zelda: (Grabs Mewtwo by the Hand Quickly Rushes the Him and Herself Out if the Room) Ignore him, Mewwy, let's go!
The gang make their way to a nearby elevator going down, leaving Kazuya and Jin to mercilessly fight one another inside the shoebox room.
@keyenuta
@cyber-wildcat
@albion-93
@theweebmaster31
@thelexhex
@tampire
13 notes · View notes
hall0wedwyrm · 5 months
Text
the only actual humans out of my fankids
Tumblr media
Heather, Valentine and Victor!!
Val and Heather grew up incredibly close (bcs Mario and Luigi are very close) so they're essentially siblings. They also grew up with Niko and Nina (bcs Sonic is close with the brothers too (the hc that hes their third brother,,,,,, why does no one use it))
Heather technically has 4 parents. Luigi and Daisy thought it would be fun to be parents together, and they thought reaallly long and hard about it, and they went for it. The two of them are like ... super best friends. Daisy is with Rosalina (which Heather represents by the star earring) and Luigi is with Bowser (represented by the spike and also Bowser badge she wears). She's very bubbly and optimistic, like Daisy, and she's not much of a fighter, like Luigi.
Valentine is the youngest son of Peach and Mario. Since he was young, he LOVED the idea of being a ruler like Peach. He's a little bit sassy, and is incredibly capable of becoming a ruler some day (His oldest sister Clementine is happy being the beautiful daughter who's got an uncanny resemblance to Peach, and middle sister Florentine likes doing various business aspects of the kingdom) due to his strong head and determination.
until.
Victor Robotnik is the protege of Eggman, and also his son. As the new local menace, hes incredibly good at leading a Badnik army. Hes just absolutely ass at making robots... hes like a kid with crayons. Eggman officially takes the role of inventor and builder, while Victor is manager and battle field leader. Hes actually rather successful in his duty of... causing as much damage as possible really.
Valentine and Victor develop... an odd relationship. They are weirdly very into eachother??? but Valentine uses the logical part of his brain and thinks 'hey maybe i shouldn't date my uncles arch nemesis's son' and tries to avoid him the best he can. But its really reaaaaally hard to do that when your cousin is up in his business the moment he steps foot in Central City. (Spoiler; this logic does not last long)
deeeets:
Niko and Vic have a very similar dynamic to Eggman and Sonic from the Fandubs. Vic goes on a tangent and Niko basically tells him to shut up and then beats up his new weapons and leaves.
Victor sees the relation Heather has to Bowser, and he thinks he can get her to join him, but she just laughs at him.
Valentine and Niko made a truce, "I wont tell anyone about Victor, and you dont tell anyone about-" "wait who are YOU WITH??"
Victor really looks upto Eggman and Bowser, but when he learns Bowser doesn't do the villain thing anymore he's a bit disappointed
I think the pairing of Heather and another character is oddly sweet and equally hilarious but i think im gonna do a big post probably named Partner Reveal (mainly because i dont have a reference for Heathers partner yet)
When the four were young, Heather and Niko are the cousins that roll around in the mud together, and if any went on Val he would cry. (he still would)
okay thats all I'll be posting more soon teehee
10 notes · View notes
Text
So, the other day, I posted this video, because I figured enough time had passed since I last posted one of the clips of the thing I'm inexplicably obsessed with (late-night 00s Edinburgh shows), so I could get away with posting that one again. This led to a conversation with @lastweeksshirttonight, in which they asked me whether old Edinburgh Festival was always that unhinged. To which I would say - I watched a 2-hour documentary on it that went through years of weird shit that's happened there and didn't even mention Cowgate (though I think that's mainly because Daniel Kitson didn't do the documentary, obviously, so they glossed over his era of hosting a bit, and only really focused on him in a clip of one time when he was being a dick to Ava Vidal, for some reason). Maybe more significantly, a bunch of comedians got a collective nickname for pioneering the groundbreaking, so remarkable they got named after it, idea of not getting drunk every night during Edinburgh late-night shows.
Anyway, this made me think of the guy singing in the above video, whose name is Seán Cullen. He's Canadian, I used to occasionally hear him on CBC radio when I was younger. From 1987 to 1998, he was in a band called Corky and the Juice Pigs, with comedian Phil Nichol, and Greg Neale. I actually remember Corky and the Juice Pigs a bit too, from when I was young. They used to play on CBC radio, and I think they had songs on a compilation tape (like, an actual cassette tape) of Canadian comedy songs that my dad used to play in the car when I was about eight years old. Arrogant Worms, Bowser and Blue, Three Dead Trolls - those are the three Canadian comedy bands that I remember well being really into as a kid (and not just when I was a kid - the number of Arrogant Worms songs in my music collection has three digits in it, I last saw them live when I was well into my twenties, and I'd see them again tomorrow if the opportunity presented itself). I only very recently made the connection that Corky and the Juice Pigs - that other band that I used to hear play very Canadian joke songs - is the same as the band that Phil Nichol was in with that guy who sang Oh Edinburgh in that video. Turns out I've known who those guys are for way longer than I'd previously thought.
I definitely remember this song from those childhood road trips:
youtube
I fucking loved this song during my childhood phase of thinking Canadians making fun of Americans was the funniest thing in the world (this phase didn't start with Rick Mercer's Talking to Americans but it was certainly fuelled by it).
Anyway, I didn't realize until last month that I've known who Phil Nichol was since I was maybe six years old, when I suddenly made the connection between his band and those childhood cassette tapes. But I did know that part of the answer to "was old Edinburgh Festival always that unhinged?" is "Well, the guy singing the song in that 2001 video that prompted the question was used to be in a band with a Canadian comedian named Phil Nichol, who won the Perrier Award in 2006 for an anti-Iraq war protest show that ended with him removing all his clothes and having about twenty other people on stage with him do the same and encouraging the audience to do so as well, and the in 2008 he called into Daniel Kitson's Melbourne radio show at 3 AM while clearly high to tell him that he loves him, and also that he's just made out with a woman in a car."
Of all the comedians I’ve discovered through my obsession with 00s Edinburgh comedy, Phil Nichol is one of the ones I quite like. At some point after his Corky and the Juice Pigs days ended in the late 90s, he moved to England and has been a comedian there ever since.
He has two old specials on NextUp: Nearly Gay from 2005 and The Naked Racist from 2006 (that’s the one that won the Perrier Award). Nearly Gay is a show that started because of what I think was Corky and the Juice Pigs’ most popular song: The Only Gay [word I, personally, would not use for Inuit people]. Apparently American comedian Scott Capurro repeatedly accused the song of being homophobic, so in 2005, Phil Nichol wrote a whole show about how he can’t be homophobic because he has lots and lots of gay friends and has done lots of stuff that could be considered “gay”, even though he’s heterosexual. And the show is… shockingly, much, much less awful than you’d expect, given the premise. I mean, it’s not perfect. But you know how bad a show you’re imagining based on my description? It’s a lot better than that.
Most of the time, I would say it would be annoying to spend five minutes listening to a straight dude explain how he’s exempt from homophobia because he kissed his male friend as a joke while drunk once and he has gay friends; it would be unbearable to listen to a guy do that on stage for a whole hour. But Phil Nichol gets away with it, because… okay, I have to admit, he’s got a point. He’s got a lot more to his defense than just an “I kissed a guy when I was drunk once” story. He makes his claims and then backs them up. Especially for 2005, when it was way less acceptable for straight guys to do anything that could possibly be perceived as gay. He had me at some point thinking – okay, fair enough, I think this straight guy might actually be sufficiently connected to the gay community to get a little bit of a pass.
It also helps that I don’t think the thing for which he was defending himself really needed defending. He was accused of homophobia over his song The Only Gay [word that I, personally, would not use for Inuit people], and you will notice there’s only one word in that song’s title that I refuse to type, and that word is not “gay”. I’ve heard the song, and I don’t think it is offensive to gay people. Whether it’s offensive to anyone else… I mean, it’s got a racial slur in the title. And I realize that word is not a racial slur everywhere. I realize in some parts of the world, it’s even the term that’s preferred by people it describes. But not in Canada. I was a child in Canada in the 90s, and I knew back then that that word is offensive, so I think it’s fair to say that Canadian band Corky and the Juice Pigs should have known that, even in the 90s. It’s a whole big thing here – we recently had the city of Edmonton change the name of a major sports team because you don’t use that word.
Having said that, there are multiple people in the YouTube comments saying they’re Inuit and they love this song. I do actually know a couple of Inuit people who have no problem with that word, but I know others who absolutely hate it. It’s down to the individual, and I wouldn’t tell any Inuit person not to use it. But overall, I would say the problem with the song that has a racial slur in the title is not that it pokes fun at gay stereotypes. It pokes fun at gay stereotypes, it pokes fun at Inuit stereotypes, and as a gay person, I’m authorized to give Phil Nichol and co a pass for one of those things but not the other. I’m happy to grant the pass in this instance (even though I’m not really authorized, as those are pretty specifically gay male stereotypes).
I’ll admit it also makes a difference to me that comedian Scott Capurro, the guy who complained about this, is on Comedy Unleashed these days. So he hasn’t got a lot of cred in the area of complaining that someone else is being offensive toward his minority status.
Honestly, the song isn’t really about gay people or Inuit people. It’s just an excuse to do an impression of a bunch of different bands, which they do entertainingly. I have to admit, I rewatched it just now and it still made me laugh. Here, watch the video and make up your own mind:
youtube
So that’s what Nearly Gay was about. His hour-long rebuttal to Scott Capurro’s claims that he was homophobic because he sang a song about a gay guy being turned on by the North Pole. Some weird beef between a Canadian comedian and an American comedian, that he decided to bring to Edinburgh. Again, I might try harder to see Scott Capurro’s side if he weren’t [I almost linked to a video of him on Comedy Unleashed here, then though better of it, just trust me on this].
2005 was also the year that Daniel Kitson did a show that had a fair bit in it dedicated to refuting a female journalist who called him a misogynist. I guess that was a big year for straight men explaining how people were wrong to call them these things. But I have to say… Phil Nichol made a better case than Daniel Kitson. They both had a point. But Phil Nichol did just happen to have a massive arsenal of stories ready to explain why he might be the most gay-adjacent straight man of the decade.
This was the first Phil Nichol show I saw, when I got into him earlier this year. It certainly made an impression. It takes a while to adjust to Phil Nichol, no matter what you’re watching him do. Just to train your brain to get used to the breakneck pace at which he talks, his relentless enthusiasm. Listening to a Phil Nichol show is like having a conversation with an extremely excitable friend who absolutely cannot fucking wait to tell you about the eighteen different thoughts in his brain at any given second. This is partly because he talks in such a conversational style, if you assume it’s a conversation with someone who’s just ingested a lot of amphetamine-based drugs. “Okay, okay, so then this happened, and okay, I have to tell you this part – yeah, okay, and then, right, he comes up and does this, so I fucking don’t know what to do, right, because what are you supposed to do there, so then I just start screaming, and…” It’s like that. He talks like that. Non-stop. For an hour.
There are a lot of act-outs, both physical and verbal. I’ve never been hugely into physical comedy, and his acts aren’t very physical. It doesn’t really rely on the actions to show you the joke. It’s more than he runs around the stage, he waves his arms around to emphasize his points, every once in a while he’ll bring in a gesture to show you what he means. Like he has more to say than he could possibly say in a lifetime and is trying to get across as much as possible. I like the verbal act-outs, though, if that’s the right term for it, which I’m almost sure it isn’t. There’s probably a word for it. Sound effects? Telling a story, then immediately doing something onomatopoeic to demonstrate how something in the story sounded, then right back into the story. Act-outs with audio description.
It's a wild style, it doesn’t always work. I’m sure it doesn’t work for everyone – I can imagine some people (justifiable) really not liking him. Honestly, I found him a bit of an acquired taste. The first time I watched him, I got about ten minutes in and thought this probably won’t be for me. It took me about twenty minutes to really buy into it. But once I did, I found it very entertaining. He can take up all your attention, draw you right in so you don’t get distracted until he’s done.
Are his jokes well written? Honestly, I have no fucking idea. I suspect not. I cannot, off the top of my head, think of a good joke I’ve heard him tell. Is he using stage presence and delivery to cover for a lack of really strong material? I don’t know, probably. But that should be allowed, shouldn’t it? If it works? If you can still make people laugh? Some people get away with just getting on stage and slipping on banana peels, and because they look funny when they do it, it counts as good comedy (to people who like that sort of thing). So surely Phil Nichol’s stuff counts even if it relies on the way he talks.
He probably does have some good jokes. I don’t know, when I try to pick out individual pieces of his set, thinking too hard about the minutiae of something that intense makes my head hurt. I just sit back, spend an hour with no idea what’s going on, and once it’s over, I realize I had a good time.
The next show I saw him do was The Naked Racist in 2006. Perrier winner. Beat out other nominees David O’Doherty, We Are Klang, Russell Howard, and Paul Sinha for it. I want people to know I wrote that sentence without looking it up, then looked it up, and I was correct. I know too much. The point is that it won this award, and not in a particularly weak year (whether you think it was weak depends on your view of those other four acts, but they’re so different from each other that I think any comedy fan would like at least one of those four - personally I'm partial to all four, at least the 2006 versions of them, they represent four very different sides of what I enjoy about 00s comedy).
This was, essentially, an anti-war show. That was big in 2006. It’s almost weird now, because it’s been so long since the invasions of Afghanistan and Iraq, and advances in technology have made the state of “being at war” so much more nebulous (not that Western countries weren’t attacking Central America and the Middle East and various bits of Africa in covert ways during the twentieth century, but it became a lot more common with increased military technology in relatively recent years), so everyone is always at war. In the early 00s, the idea of the US and the UK being “at war” was a relatively new one, to people who’s grown up in the 70s/80s/90s (again, you do have to ignore a lot of shit to believe that, including some stuff pretty close to home for Britain, but that’s how it seemed), and wanted their countries to continue to be at peace. “Pacifist” was a more coherent political stance then, I think, and more common than it is now.
The Naked Racist is a pacifist show. It’s not a general political show, it’s not a general hippie show, it’s not even only an anti-Iraq war show (although it talks significantly about Iraq) – it’s a show about the specific and coherent political position of pacifism. I find that interesting, just for what it says about the changing political landscape since then.
It’s a show with a pacifist message, but it certainly doesn’t seem like political comedy. It seems like a bunch of stories about doing a lot of drugs and having a lot of sex. Because it is that. It’s a hundred stories all at once, at any given time he’s trying to tell at least eight, before moving on to the next ones. It’s a collection of stories that unfold enough so you realize – okay, I’m pretty sure this is a fairly wild life even for a touring comedian. Sorry, what was that one about the sex club? And it’s not a story of the novelty of the weird time when he walked into a place that turned out to be a sex club. It’s the story of how he likes going to sex clubs and doing drugs and listening to certain music and pushing himself because that makes him feel deeply alive, and it’s something we can all do with our inherent desires to hurt other people, and humanity doesn’t need war, we can all sublimate our violent urges into all this other shit instead. Which might be, you know, a small oversimplification of how deadly global conflicts work. But let him make you believe it for an hour, it’s beautiful.
I should give a warning – there are some N words in this show. Late in the show, at the crux of it. In the most justifiable context that word can have – repeating what got said in another instance while clearly stating that it’s bad that it got said. I just don’t think that particular word has any context that’s actually justifiable. I don’t even want to talk about changing times since 2006, because I don’t think it was any better then than it is now. But also, just because I don’t think context fully absolves him doesn’t mean I won’t consider it at all when judging the show. I enjoyed the show anyway. Just like, I guess, I laughed at the Only Gay song anyway. I will turn against a comedian I otherwise like if I think they say something shitty in a way that clearly shows them to actually be shitty (Alfie Brown). But I don’t think this is that, even though I don’t agree with his choice to use the word. If we start getting rid of anyone who’s ever said that word in any context then we’d have to start with Stewart Lee, and that would be a whole big thing.
The show ends with some other stuff that… completely reasonable people could take issue with. Phil Nichol’s clothes come off, then dancers and other people who are part of the show join him on stage and their clothes come off (that didn’t include anyone I recognized in the DVD recording that’s on NextUp, but the description says that when this was performed in Edinburgh, they had Pappy’s Fun Club and Phil Kay and whatever other comedians they could convince doing it), then the camera pans around to show dancers spread across the crowd taking clothes off, and then they encourage the audience do the same. They don’t, to be clear, try to make anyone do it. It’s a very “join us in this if you want to!” situation. So the audience has a choice of whether to take off their clothes, but not in whether to see a lot of other people do that.
And I do mean all their clothes. Full frontal. I’ve seen a lot of Phil Nichol. I’ve seen all of Phil Nichol, it was on display to the audience and camera.
I think this is a grey area, morally, which can sometimes go from a vague academic discussion into something with consequences. See: Jerry Sadowitz, last year. I should say that I don’t have much of an opinion on the Jerry Sadowitz thing, because I can’t have much of an opinion, I’ve never seen a moment of any of his comedy, much less whatever he did the night he got canceled. I’ve read a bit about what he does, I have an idea of what happened, I’m pretty sure I think the venue was probably right to get rid of him. Probably. But I don’t call that “much of” an opinion because I don’t really know.
I know that last year, part of why his venues canceled on him is they said he took out his dick and showed it to an audience member. And I know that some people defended him by saying seeing dicks is not uncommon at a late-night Edinburgh show, people should know what they’re getting into. And my view on that is… I don’t know enough about it to be sure, I can’t really definitely say. But I know context matters, and my guess is that context is violating. Someone can be okay with the possibility that someone’s dick will come out, without being okay with having it shoved in their face specifically, to humiliate them because the comedian gets mad at them. Phil Nichol got his dick out and jumped up and down for all to see, but he didn’t single anyone out with it.
I have seen enough other Late ‘n’ Live clips to know it is true when people say that sometimes people get their dicks out during late-night Edinburgh shows (or they did, at least – not sure if it’s so common these days). And while full frontal nudity is relatively rare, I’ve seen plenty of comedy things, in stand-up and TV, where a comedian ends up in their underwear. It happens. Sometimes that’s a natural consequence of escalating a bit. And Phil Nichol is nothing if not an escalator of bits.
I think whether it’s okay always depends on context. Is it reasonable to say the audience should have expected the amount of nudity they got? If not, and unsuspecting people had this thrown at them, that’s anything from a shitty and cancel-able comedy show, to a serious crime. If the audience knew what they were getting into, then I think it’s fair to say the comedian didn’t violate anyone. They chose to show up.
I’ve read the description of The Naked Racist (it really is all in the title – I enjoyed this show a lot, but when writing about it, I’ve felt the need to warn people that there is, in fact, nudity and racism in it), and I know a bit about Phil Nichol in general, and I think anyone who’d done those things at the time should have had a reasonable expectation that he might at some point get his dick out. He didn’t spring that on anyone who shouldn’t have known.
Honestly, it looked like fun. I don’t know what the fuck I’d have done if I’d been in that crowd. I mean, I know my clothes would have stayed on. But I don’t know if I’d have been uncomfortable with what was happening around me, or gotten caught up in the excitement of it. Because that’s what it was. That was the idea behind that as the finale – that people should do wild exciting things like take their clothes off, instead of fight wars. Again, an oversimplification of global policy. But it sure looks cathartic.
After that, I went to Go Faster Stripe and bought his 2021 show Your Wrong. That one was very slightly calmer, but no less intense, I think. He was a little older, slightly less animated, but that’s still more animated than most people I’ve ever seen do anything. But the story stayed intense because it was more personal, some fucking striking stories about his family and his upbringing. It explained a lot, to be honest. It was like learning about him out of order. I normally like discovering a comedian’s work in chronological order, so I start with their earlier stuff when they tend to be more autobiographical, and then I get to seeing the person they became as a result of that autobiography. Phil Nichol went the other ways. I heard his wild edgy stories of the wild edgy person he was in 2005 and 2006, and then I skipped to 2021 and heard him tell me how he grew up, and I said, “Oh, that explains a lot.” That he was raised in a hardcore Christian family and then ran off to Britain, where he immediately dedicated his life to drugs and sex clubs to be the opposite of his family.
Well, after having this conversation the other day, I decided to buy another Phil Nichol thing off Go Faster Stripe, his 2015 show that I hadn’t seen yet called I Don’t Wanna Talk About It. I watched it for the first time today. I enjoyed it a lot. He’s still very fucking animated, though a few breaths less mobile than in 2005 and 2006. It’s a breakup show, and I tend to like breakup shows. It’s a show that oscillates wildly between hope and despair, and I tend to like that too. It ends with a traditional really "big finish", including a fakeout and a song, and I like that.
It also had some stuff about Canadian politics, which I really liked. Specific stuff, about our political parties and scandals they've had and the issue of Quebec's separation referendum. I don't see that often. I don't see much Canadian comedy, and political stuff is such a small percentage of any comedy I see. I see huge swathes of British comedy, and still have to pick through just a few comedians to get political stuff. So in my smaller pool of Canadian comedians I'm into, the crossover with political comedy is almost zero. I really enjoyed some jokes about it.
“We had a referendum in Canada – this is true, a true story. I don’t know if you know, but the Bloc Quebecois – a separatist group from French Canada, they want to separate on the grounds that they’re a different people, right – and at one point the Liberal Party in Canada was decimated by a scandal, and so the Bloc Quebecois rose to power, right, and became the Official Opposition in the House of Parliament, against Conservatives, who are right-wing fucking Christian motherfuckers. So, at one point, in the Canadian government, there was all these French guys who wanted to fuck off out of Canada, and a whole bunch of English guys who wanted the French to fuck off out of Canada. It was amazing!”
If you're not from Canada, you should know that extract I just quoted is 100% accurate. He's right, one province's separatist party did become the Official Opposition in our federal government once. People should be making jokes about that all the time.
This show gets into a few specifics of his life that I hadn’t known before. Apparently he grew up in fucking Pickering – I didn’t know that before. I know Pickering well. I live about four hours away from it. There’s a major wrestling team there, and they host several tournaments every year, so I’ve been there to coach a lot. And even when I’m not actually in Pickering, I’ve spent a lot of time with people from there, competing against people from their team in tournaments held in other places.
I kind of love the idea that one of those people raised in that fucking place turned into Phil Nichol. Because that place as I know it is pretty much what he described. Small, insular, reputation-driven, Christian. His show mentions that two of his nieces from that place got pregnant as teenagers, and were shunned by the community as a result (he's the cool uncle in this story, not one of the people doing the shunning). Personally, I know two different people from Pickering who got teenage pregnant or teenage impregnated someone. It’s common there, what with the whole Christian thing, the lack of sex ed and everything that comes with that. I’ve met so many bright promising teenagers from that conservative repressive place, and I've seen how few options they have. I hope every fucking one of them follows in the footsteps of Phil Nichol. I hope they all move to England and do a lot of drugs and make out with women in cars and call into radio stations to tell Daniel Kitson they love him and protest against wars and win major awards for it.
I think I started this post with the idea that it would build up to something, but I can't remember what that thing was anymore, and this seems like as good a note as any on which to end it.
2 notes · View notes
aishutoon · 2 years
Text
As I was going down my list of fanfics to make fanart for, I came across the link for the fanfic “Paper Mario: The Temple of the Sun”, which got me thinking about the fan partners I made after being inspired by that fic. So, I decided to actually draw them!
Tumblr media
Some context for the story, even though I don’t have the whole thing figured out: The main villain is a Shaman (like Merlon or Merlee, but evil) who is searching for the pieces of an ancient puzzle that can grant one wish to whoever puts it together, and one of these pieces happens to be in Peach’s castle! So, she just steals the whole castle with everyone still inside, and now Mario, Luigi, and the partners they find along the way have to go on a journey to find the pieces of the puzzle and find out where Peach’s castle is. In the meantime, Peach is gathering information about the history of the villain and befriending one of the other prisoners, and Bowser is going on his own journey to find the castle because Bowser Jr. was still inside when it was whisked away.
The partners in order:
Orion: A timid, soft-spoken kid who’s the son of the villain (I haven’t come up with a name for her yet). He escaped the castle with the base of the ancient puzzle and ran into Mario and Luigi as a result, and now he’s helping the bros stop his mom’s evil scheme. He’s a huge bookworm, so he can Tattle enemies, as well as attack by lobbing a heavy shot put ball at them.
Deena: A cheerful Dry bones girl who’s aspiring to become a famous journalist, even if she gets in over her head sometimes. She can attack enemies with a shell attack or by throwing a bone or two at them. Can you guess which journalist she looks up to the most?
Hayase: A stoic Ninji who is training to become stronger at the dojo Mario and crew happen to visit. When it gets attacked by the main villain’s goons, Hayase joined Mario to fight them off. She can attack enemies with her ninja stars, and help Mario and Luigi avoid attacks for some time with her vanish ability.
Matcha T: Ok, technically this guy is the last partner you’d meet if this was a game, but I screwed up with the formatting, so let’s just go out of order for a bit. Matcha T. is a hotheaded young toad who periodically attacked Mario & co. a few times along the journey. Later, it is revealed that his little sister is one of the people who was in Peach’s castle when it was taken, and he had been attacking Mario & Co. in order to get strong enough to take on the stronger enemies sent by the villain. Once that misunderstanding is cleared up, he joins the gang to help save the prisoners. He attacks using bomb fruits (y’know, like the ones from Mario party ds? …yeah I know that’s a stretch)
Dottie: I’m gonna be honest with you guys, I thought of this character kind of at the last minute, so I don’t have a huge story for her. But I really like how her design turned out! Dottie is a sweet penguin who’s part of an ice skating group in the ice world of this game. She can attack enemies with ice breath and by sliding towards them on her belly. In the overworld, she can help Mario swim across bodies of water.
Rufus: If this was an actual game, the player would be the one who names this Chain chomp, but the default name for now is Rufus. He’s a rough, aggressive chain chomp who starts following the crew after being shown kindness for the first time by Orion. He’s a strong attacker with his chain whip and charge attacks. Sawyer: A young Swoop who’s the hopeless romantic sort, as well as an aspiring poet. He joins Mario & co. after his crush gets kidnapped by goons, and stays with them on the journey in order to get more ideas for poems. He can attack with his claws and screech attack. In the overworld, he can help Mario fly for a short amount of time over gaps. Probably one of my favorite designs out of the bunch ngl.
Phew, that’s all the partners! Holy crud, I’ve never made a post this long before. If you read through the whole thing, you’re awesome!
11 notes · View notes
abrilstevens · 4 years
Photo
Tumblr media Tumblr media
1K notes · View notes
weirdmarioenemies · 3 years
Photo
Tumblr media
Name: Nabbit
Debut: New Super Mario Bros. U
Nabbit! You all know him, you love him, you asked for him! By which I mean we got an Ask asking to cover Nabbit, and I had previously no intention of doing so but it made me think, hey, I WOULD like to talk about Nabbit! Thanks @oddity-txt! 
Nabbit! Like. Nab it. Cause he’s a rab-a thief, he’s a rabbit thief you get it yeah. This guy is a real piece of work, let me tell you! He steals items from Toad Houses and runs off with them! Those are for Mario! Can you believe not everyone in this economy agrees with hoarding power-ups to give them away to Mario in wacky chance-based minigames? So its up to you to chase him down. And chase him down you do! 
But why does Nabbit want these items? Does he just enjoy the thrill of the chase? Or is he just trying to provide for his family? Can he sell them on the item black market? Why would there be an item black market when you can find this stuff anywhere on the street? Mario doesn’t care. Mario wants to attack the symptom of the problem rather than addressing the systemic cause.  
Tumblr media
Still, I feel like we need to have a good talk about what Nabbit is... other than a hooligan, obviously! Earlier I called him a rabbit but taking a look at him, it’s fairly clear he’s wearing some kind of rubbery rabbit suit, with only the black arms and feets sticking out... So of course we need to speculate all the possibilities! Possibility A is that he is a human or some other known character in disguise, which isn’t fun. Next! Possibility B is that he’s an actual rabbit wearing a rabbit-shaped bodysuit, which I quite like because it is absurd. Possibility 3 is none of the above and he is some mystery creature, which I’ll leave up to YOU to imagine because I’m not entirely sure what that would be. 
Point number 2 about Nabbit’s ambiguous identity: the bandanna! It has a similar (but not identical) design to Bowser Jr.’s bandanna, and even though he does not work for Bowser, it just feels like a strangely specific design choice! I can get why Junior wants to look ferocious, but Nabbit is more of the stealthy type right? Because of this I’ve always envisioned Nabbit as having actual fangs under the bandanna, like the Impostor from Amongus, which you can’t disprove because he’s never been seen without it.
Or maybe it’s just fashion. It’s probably just fashionable. 
This isn’t the last we’ll see of Nabbit of course! The developers of New Super Mario Bros. U had precisely three (3) new ideas, and damn if they weren’t gonna milk them for all they’re worth! I could get upset that characters from the New Super series get this treatment when other more beloved characters from spin-offs don’t, but also, come on... look at the guy! I can’t stay mad at him! He’s purple!
Tumblr media
So in Nabbit’s next ever appearance, New Super Luigi U... he became playable! Wow, that was quick! With Mario gone, they scrambled around the office for anyone they could find to fill his place, and they settled on Nabbit! They’re not paying Nabbit extra though, so he kind of had to phone it in.
Tumblr media
In this game, Nabbit is totally invincible! Why? Maybe he is like Wario and simply does not care enough to get hit. He can’t use power-ups because they didn’t have the budget to design new costumes for him and he can’t pick up items or ride Yoshis. The game frames this as an “easy mode”, but what kind of easy mode forces one player to always use it? Let’s be honest, it’s because they didn’t want to make a brand new character. The Year of Luigi was a tough time for Nintendo! 
So rather then collect power-ups he just puts them in his bag, and they get converted into 1-Ups at the end of the level. Is THIS what he was stealing those items for? Is Nabbit’s ultimate goal to reach immortality through illegally trading 1-Up mushrooms? Maybe something like that probably. It’s kinda fun that he’s a ‘bad guy’ but Luigi and friends don’t really mind keeping him around. 
Tumblr media
Nabbit also appears in spin-offs of course. Enough spin-offs that he feels like a proper modern Mario character, but sparsely enough that you think “wow, they put Nabbit in this game?” when they put Nabbit in the game. Here he is in the Rio Olympics, and you could make a very easy joke about him being a thief in Rio de Janeiro, which I won’t. Instead I will ask: why the heck is he carrying his sack in a marathon! Just let go dude! Don’t they have changing room lockers in the Olympics?
Tumblr media
Here he is in Golf! As DLC, for all the six people out there who loved Mario Golf World Tour so much they simply had to get new characters for it. This picture labels him as an Eagle but I’m pretty sure he isn’t one, though I might be wrong. 
Tumblr media
Here is Nabbit, well known thief, outlaw, and general ne'er-do-well as a doctor! I mean, I know the healthcare system is a scam but this is a little on the nose don’t you think? He just put a pill sticker on his thief sack and called it a day! Can we even be sure there are pills in there? What if he is prescribing patients with stolen Super Acorns from Acorn Plains 5 - Rise of the Piranha Plants? Oh no! 
Tumblr media
Nabbit Mario Kart? It is more likely than you think! Of course only in the mobile game with a gacha. They could’ve done it in Mario Kart 8 but they know people will pay good money for Nabbit! Well jokes on them because I got him in the gacha for free. Nyeeh. 
Tumblr media
Nabbit is also in Mario & Luigi: Paper Jam! Did you know this? I didn’t play Paper Jam, so I didn’t. I’m sorry. You need to catch him in order to get Bros. Attack items. At one later point, you even fight him! Or rather, fight enemies he kept in his bag, while he naps in the background. Is that legal? He can also pop out behind you and steal your hammers to whack you with. Yeouch! 
However, he also fights ALONGSIDE you for some fights against Bowser’s minions, acting basically like a fourth party member, except you can’t control him or anything. He gives the Bros. healing items from his bag or will occasionally bonk an enemy himself. Hooray for morally ambiguous characters! I guess he’s cool with anything as long as he gets what he wants. 
Tumblr media
Finally, I would like to talk about Nabbit in Super Smash Bros.! As one of the few original things to NSMBU, he of course appears in the Mushroom Kingdom U, alongside equally iconic characters like Beanstalk and Water Geyser! In this game he’ll grab people and stuff them in his bag, and then proceed to just... fly away, so they are killed. Wait a minute. A thief who kidnaps characters only to kill them and himself...? That sounds familiar! 
Tumblr media
I knew it! This wasn’t really Nabbit at all, but rather Tac from Kirby Super Star sneakily disguised as Nabbit! Sakurai thought he could sneak you into this stage to satiate his never-ending lust for Kirby Super Star references in Smash... He wasn’t even content just having you in Smash Run and Smash Tour! 
Well, mystery solved everyone! I think we can go ahead and end this post while we arrest Tac for his crimes of identity theft, and not regular theft, which isn’t really an actual crime after all. 
336 notes · View notes
crusherthedoctor · 3 years
Note
So there's a notion that Sonic needs to have a rogues' gallery, right? While that notion isn't bad by itself, the rogues comprising the gallery should be actually engaging characters and shouldn't overshadow the main antagonist, which both are qualities that many Sonic villains lack. While Batman's rogues' are both engaging and don't take the attention away from the Joker himself, Sonic's foes need to upstage Eggman as if it's a rite of passage to confirm their evilness, and that's the problem.
I remember this being a popular idea on SSMB. Didn't agree with it back then either, or rather not the specific way they usually had in mind (read: do it like Archie). Fans who demand as much simply can't see that it's not quite as feasible in a franchise that has worked in the way that it has for three decades and counting. Sonic isn't going to suddenly operate like Batman, because it never started like Batman.
Sonic is not like Batman, Spider-Man, and other superheroes, where they've always had a rogues gallery since the beginning. Sonic is not like Disney movies, where there's a different villain for each movie's set of characters and universe. Sonic is not even like Spyro, where the amount of games that used the unofficial arch-enemy figure (Ripto) is equal to the amount of games that used another villain, without giving it much fanfare one way or the other. Since 1991, Sonic has had Eggman, his robots... and a whole bunch of one-timers.
It's got nothing to do with me being an Eggman fan. It's a basic acknowledgement that if a long-lasting video game franchise handles villain management in this way, it's unlikely to craft a genuine rogues gallery beyond one-off villains, with MAYBE one or two exceptions at most. Mario has had villains not named Bowser, but most of them have been one and done. Zelda has had villains not named Ganon, but most of them never left their game of origin bar maybe a cameo. Crash has had other Big Bads not related to Cortex, but the only one that stuck around is Oxide (not counting some characters' reappearances as playable racers in Nitro-Fueled).
Like I've always said, Sonic can have other villains as long as they don't stand on Eggman's toes in the process. A recurring cast of minor rogues is also fine, like Fang the Sniper for instance. But the idea of a full-on recurring gallery of Big Bad-tier villains is unrealistic at this point, and the SSMB philosophy that villains battling each other for control is "exciting", "mature", and "ups the stakes"... don't realise that it would lose its luster very quickly if it were done so often. Not everything that may work in comics is going to translate well into a game, and that's without taking into account whether you thought the other villains in Archie were even that good to begin with.
10 notes · View notes
kinglarrykoopadx · 3 years
Text
Top 10 games i wanted to get
This is a personal list of games I want to get but I just can’t. Ranging from “maybe someday” to “get as fast as possible”. I’m gonna input some rules to my list to make it more fair. First off, I’m counting the games from the 8th to 9th console generation only, cause I ain’t wasting my money to buy an old console for like, what, one game? Second, no mobile games, because most of the time, they’re free even in the pre registration state. Yeah, there are some paid games but they’re pretty scarce. Speaking of pre registration, third, no pre orders, so I don’t have to regret wasting my money when I eventually get the damn game. That being said, pre orders of ports of games from older console generations will definitely count, so long as I’ve already played them or were interested by them.
10. Bug Fables
Bug Fables and I have a love-hate-ish relationship. On one hand, I wanna get it to see what of the old Paper Marios that got the fans to crazy town. On the other hand, some TTYD related salt lingers in me like how well butter sticks on bread. On the other other hand, I’m cursed with somehow finding more interesting games. Maybe one day I’ll get it, but for now, I’ll give it a pass thank you very much. But hey, I did say I’m considering buying it. Which no, it doesn’t mean I wannna see any “pLaY bUg fAbLeS” comments around, how many times must I tell you lot that shoving a game up my ass is less advertising, more making me resent the damn thing?
9. Crash 4 : It’s About Time
I’mma be honest. After watching some Caddicarus and AntDude, I’m willing to give the marsupial a chance. I did play the mobile game and it was fun but it’s a mobile game so it didn’t count. I am considering getting Crash 4, but I’m on the verge of rethinking if this was a good idea. From what I heard, this is a short ass game, and I’m not selling my soul to the completion devil to extend my game time. Bug Fables and Crash 4 are honestly, interchangable as fuck.
8. Crash Bandicoot : N Sane Trilogy + CTR Nitro Fueled
For N Sane Trilogy, it’s so I can know the context of Crash 4′s story and play through it. For Nitro Fueled, I’m getting it for funsies, I mean for fuck’s sake they added in the crates as racers, the only weird thing that can combat it is Piranha Plant in Smash. But the microtransactions make me rethink it, so maybe someday.
7. Pokemon Mystery Dungeon DX
Now we’re getting to the games where I have some interest in getting. Here we have the remake of Mystery Dungeon Red/Blue from the GBA/DS which I adored dearly. I was a fan of the Mystery Dungeon series by watching people play them, and playing some myself. I’ve played Gates To Infinity and never finished it (The farthest I could go was in the Holehills), I played Super but also with Gates To Infinity I never finished it (I think last I checked I made it to Entei) and now, I’m kinda planning to get it. Why is it this low? Key word “kinda”. Overtime, my interests for this game kinda fizzled out because it was a case of Bug Fables. Don’t get me wrong, I’d love to try it, problem is that in time, my interest sparked into other games, which we’ll see later on.
6. Yo Kai Watch 3
In case you never got the memo, I’m a huge, HUGE fan of Yo kai Watch. If it weren’t for this franchise, I’d probably be more interested in something like studying and see gaming as irrelevant. The 1st game was kinda weak sauce, the 2nd game is the best in the franchise, and I really wanted to get the 3rd game. From what I’ve seen, it looked fun as hell. Problem is, the stupid virus made it hard to salvage a copy and even then, it’s a really rare 3DS game since the number of copies Level 5 made for this game are scarce as hell. Shame really, it was content packed and everything, but whatever.
5. Bugsnax
Bugsnax for those who never knew, is a game about snacks that are also bugs. After watching a couple playthroughs, I was willing to give it a try. And that’s where problems rise. The problem with Bugsnax is that it’s a PS5/PC exclusive (at the time of writing this top 10) and I’m not buying a PS5 for one damn game, and I normally don’t use my PC for gaming. Maybe one day when Young Horses port this cute game to the Switch I’ll give it a try, but for now, I’ll wait.
4. Mario Golf Super Rush
I know I said no pre orders, but this one’s an exception. I’m actually real hyped for this one, for starters, it’s not tennis for once, fucking woo, and the story mode made it look like it’s a pretty promising game, since people liked the story mode in the GBA games. Yeah, the visuals look lifeless, but do I give a crap? I’m just relieved Nintendo still knows that Mario sports games don’t just consist of tennis. And who knows, maybe the stars may align and we can get a new Mario Strikers or Mario Baseball with Nintendo purchasing Next Level Games and this game coming soon.
3. Bowser’s Fury
This game was one of the most anticipated Mario games for the switch simply because it was the banner for the future of 3D Mario. And from what I’ve seen, it’s pretty good. I mean, for starters, you team up with Bowser Jr so this game is already eyecatching from the start. The game has you collecting the 50 Cat Shines to awaken the Giga Bells and stop Fury Bowser which is a solid premise. Fury Bowser being the main highlight of the game because he’s the game’s blood moon. When he’s out, be ready to be pummeled big time. With rock music playing in the background. It didn’t make it to the top 2 of the “most wanted” games, but it is hella close.
2. Hollow Knight
After seeing people play it and listening to some of its musical scores, I’m willing to give this game a big fat chance. Hollow Knight is some Metroidvania game involving a lone soul in search of the source of ruin of the kingdom of Hallownest which is a solid as hell premise. On the way, you’ll meet some kind NPCs and traverse unknown lands and the DLC added to this game made it more than worth it. Lifeblood which has patches and a new boss namely Hive Knight, Grimm Troupe which from what I’ve heard included the most fun boss in Hollow Knight, Hidden Dreams which included the White Defender and Grey Prince Zote, and Godmaster, which is the game’s True Arena. Needless to say, I’m definitely gonna buy this game when I have the chance.
1. Miitopia Switch
As a fan of the 3DS game, I was hyped as hell when Miitopia was ported over to Switch, and I had every right to be hyped. Those Twitter users don’t know what the hell they’re missing out on. The combat is amazing, the characters are on point, hell, the demo had a lot of replay value. And when you make a freaking demo replayable as hell, that’s a sign of a kickass game. This is the game that can take my $50 with no hesitation. Nintendo, take my money, I’ve got a quest in need of reimagining.
15 notes · View notes
Note
Since talking about rosters is big, what do you think makes for a good roster in a Mario game?
I'm actually gonna name a few examples of rosters I consider favorites, to give a more concrete idea on that:
Mario Kart 64/Super Circuit
Tumblr media
This is the most essential selection of Mario characters. If you want to properly represent the Mario Universe at large then you NEED these exact 8 characters, replace one of them and it looks a lot more jank.
It's minimalistic, but they picked the literally perfect 8 characters.
Mario Tennis 64
Tumblr media
I gushed over this one before, so I'm gonna quote my reasoning here:
-The Big 8 (Mario, Luigi, Peach, Toad, Yoshi, Wario, DK, Bowser) are all here.
-People always want less regular or long-absent characters in the spin-offs and this game actually did it.
Prior to this game Daisy hadn’t been seen since NES Tournament Golf, Donkey Kong Jr’s presence in the series had already declined back then and Birdo had previously only been in SMB2, Wario’s Woods and Super Mario RPG.
-The concept of a Waluigi already existed long before, thanks to a Wario manga, so he has more footing as a Wario franchise element then most think.
-Baby Mario of course, is Yoshi’s partner, for some nice Yoshi’s Island vibes.
-We got Paratroopa, Boo and Shy Guy, in a time where playable mooks were a more surprising addition and didn’t flood most spin-off rosters.
-Alex, Nina, Harry and Kate are only there if you transfer them from the GBC version. This makes them not only unique due to their stats carrying over as well, but they also (much like the humans in Golf 64) call back to Mario’s very early sports game appearences (Tennis on Game Boy and NES for instance), where he usually appeared alongside regular humans, along with them just being a unique Camelot thing, which I always had a soft spot for.
There is always gonna be the question of why Captain Syrup didn't make it considering the type of character they were looking for, but we will never know for sure and I don't think it really detracts from the roster, as much as I would have adored her being there.
Mario Party 10/Star Rush
Tumblr media Tumblr media
I already defend these games for several reasons and the rosters do stand as an example of when the games are more in touch with what people would want.
Aside from the usual 8 you got Rosalina, who makes tons of sense as a newcomer and was someone people wanted, along with DK and Toadette, who people were begging to get back and we got both at once!
Spike is random and out of place, but the roster does so much else right that it's not a big deal. Star Rush even went and replaced him with Diddy, rounding the selection out very nicely.
Mario Golf World Tour
Tumblr media
My favorite modern Mario roster.
Aside from the usual 12 for Golf + Miis you got:
- Toad, who after being an NPC every time is now finally playable.
- Kamek and Rosalina, making their first playable outings in a sports game.
- Paratroopa, who is the second and last mook, which is a fine number.
- Birdo, who by that point was starting to get phased out of spin-off rosters.
- Toadette, making her first appearance since 2008 and the beginning of her rise to major character.
- Nabbid, making his first appearance outside NSMB.
- And lastly Gold Mario, who actually plays differently from the rest of the cast to represent his power-up theme, making him an actually interesting clone.
It's just a really good roster, none of it feels like filler and the Toads, Rosalina, Nabbid, Kamek and Gold Mario all shine as great newcomers.
34 notes · View notes
repentantsky · 3 years
Text
Top Games I’m Looking Forward To in 2021 (Part 1)
2020 was a horrible year, but the thing that kept me and many other sane were the slue of great games that came out, or in my case, a combination of that and buying older games for my handheld consoles. However 2021, has a lot more games that are my style, so I’m much more excited for it than I was for most of this year. Allow me to have my longest list yet in celebration of this fact, and do so in parts as there is a lot to talk about, as I look at 8 upcoming games in 2021, that I can’t wait to play. To make things fair, and hopefully to keep this list as accurate as possible, I will only be counting games that have a release date as of my writing this. Also, my lists aren’t usually ranked by how much I want to play a game, as much as they are how much I want to talk about a game, so my most anticipated game for next year could easily be the first entry. With those explanations out of the way, let’s talk about games. 
8. The Medium. 
The Medium is a horror game made in a similar vain to Silent Hill’s Midwich Elementary, in that there are two realities existing at once, and you are constantly switching in between them. The idea is always one that has fascinated me as a horror fan, but the Medium really looks to amping up the scares by using the visuals that we can currently attain to increase the fear factor, instead of making everything pretty to try and sell people on that end of it. The gross, disgusting, and frightful looking world we are presented with in The Medium is one I cannot wait to explore, even if I don’t have an Xbox Series X to play it on. Regardless of anything, it looks like it might be my personal favorite horror game of 2021 when it comes out, barring no delay, on January 28th. 
7. Ys IX: Monstrum Nox. 
The Ys series is honestly one of the more underrated long running series in JRPG history. If you need proof of that, just play Ys Origin, Memories of Celceta, or Ys VIII for confirmation. These games are incredible. YS IX looks to be taking the series in a darker direction than most, if not all the previous entries in the series, and not only is that super compelling, but it seeing YS in a darker light, might actually go a long way in helping it become the franchise it deserves to be in the eyes of fans everywhere. The combat looking more refined than ever, on top of the best visuals the franchise has seen to this point only add to the excitement, and the characters, from what we’ve seen so far, also look like they’ll stand out in a series full of fantastic characters throughout. YS IX, probably won’t be my JRPG of the Year, but darn if it won’t be up in the top 5.
6. Little Nightmares 2.    
Did I make it clear that I love horror yet? I hope so because this might not even be the last horror game on this list. The original Little Nightmares was honestly my favorite horror experience when it released, because no other game really did a better job of making you feel isolated, alone and weak, which is the prefect setting for horror. While Little Nightmares 2 won’t be doing the isolation aspect as much as the first because of a second playable character, with the danger ramped up enough, which the demo seems to show that it will be, it should be more than capable of bringing out the fear that made the first so memorable. There’s almost nothing scarier than being a small child in an adult world that seems to want you dead, and Little Nightmares 2 has all the vibes set up for freaking everyone out. I doubt many in the horror genre will be able to do it as well as this game will. 
5. Persona 5 Strikers. 
Finally we are out of horror and darker games and all that, for a bit, as Persona 5 Strikers is easily looking to be my favorite warriors games of 2021. Not only do I love the concept of Warriors titles, but the Persona universe is one that fits that genre well by default, having a near endless slue of famous enemies to turn into either fodder for the thousands of kills we’ll get, or bosses that will gave fans a sense of nostalgia, espeically if they are fans of Shin Megami Tensei and older games in the franchise. I’ll admit, I’m a little bummed it’s not Persona X Shin Megami Tensei, where characters from both the original franchise and the spinoff can get together to cause mayhem, but it’s the next best thing, and I am all here for it. The story promises to be incredible, and the gameplay fantastic, with that Atlus special touch added in. There’s no reason not be excited about what they put out there. 
4. NieR Replicant ver. 1.22474487139...
Gawd, that name though. Crazy name aside, NieR on the PS3 was a brilliant game, that was sadly underrated due to the time of it’s release, a lack of marketing, and people generally not knowing who Taro Yoko was at the time. His history speaks for itself though, with the brilliant yet weird Drankengard series, and NieR itself really being a shining example of what he can do. To see Replicant, a game that never made it to the West, be remade with combat done in the style of NieR Automata, is such an exciting prospect that I can hardly contain my hype. Not only does the title look better than the original by miles, which was visually fascinating to begin with, but the wonderful and odd music, and everything that can really be expected of Taro Yoko is there in full swing. We are looking at an upcoming masterpiece I am certain.
3. Super Mario 3D World + Bowsers Fury
I’m not always the biggest fan of Mario mainline platformers, but seeing as I really found myself enjoying his most recent Switch and 3DS exploits, I cannot help being excited for the chance to play a Mario game I haven’t had the chance to previously, with some extra content to boot. Car Mario looks like a lot of fun to play, and the chance to play with up to four people is something I can’t pass the chance to play. I know very little of the game, other than it’s massive popularity and high praise upon release, and sometimes, it’s nice to go into a game as blind as possible, even if the story isn’t likely going to be anything to write home about. Whatever the title brings, it will be enjoyable to say the least, and possibly the most solid of platformers for 2021. 
2. Bravely Default II.
I won’t lie, I have a complicated history with Bravely Default as a series. While I did manage to power my way through the first game, it took some time to make it happen, and honestly, despite it’s great characters and even better story, the gameplay left me wanting. However, Bravely Default: End Layer was and still is one of my favorite JRPG’s on the 3DS, so here’s hoping enough of the good that came from that game, finds it’s way to Bravely Default II. Regardless of if it does or not, I always willing to give a format a second go, and I’ve already found myself completely in love with the playable characters, just from the two demos alone, so all signs point to a fantastic game that I cannot to wait to experience. 
1. Poison Control.
The best part of doing a list like this, is throwing something in there that no one expects, and may not have even heard of. Without a doubt, the most anime shit style game on my list, Poison Control is a game that might be more about the story, than the gameplay. The basis is you are stuck in another world, with two characters bound to one soul, and you’re goal is to remove the poison from people’s minds, by invading their brains and literally clearing it out. You might monsters and run over the poison in their heads, to hopefully make them better people. Despite the dark sounds setting, and even the slightly darker visuals, this is probably one of the most light hearted games on my list. I have to say though, there’s always something to these sorts of games despite their obvious lack in certain quality, that I enjoy. The game doesn’t actually have a Western release date either, so I’m cheating a bit, but with a catchphrase like “Purge Poison, Raise Hell” how can you not be at least a little bit excited for what’s to come of this game. 
And that’s my list. Did I miss anything you’re super excited for? Let me know in the notes below, and be ready, because part 1 of this list will be all about games without a release date, and that’s where the hype can really begin.  
9 notes · View notes
crownedflora · 3 years
Text
𝚃𝚆𝙴𝙻𝚅𝙴 𝙿𝙴𝙾𝙿𝙻𝙴 𝙸'𝙳 𝙻𝙸𝙺𝙴 𝚃𝙾 𝙺𝙽𝙾𝚆 𝙱𝙴𝚃𝚃𝙴𝚁
tagged by: @toestalucia Thank you, friend!!! Istillfindpeoplemistakingyoururlforsomethingelsehilarious everysingletimeHaAHahhdAHehaeahedasjdf- plsneverchangeit. unlessyoureallywanttoofcourse tagging: Feel free to steal it from me!
ONE ( ALIAS / NAME ): I've gone by many names over the course of my time on the internet, but none of them reeaallly stick. So, if you've known me as somethin' from elsewhere/before, feel free to use that name. Otherwise, give me one, I guess (honestly, I'm so bad at coming up with names)??? If I got a problem with you calling me by a certain name though, I'll probably tell you. There's only one person who knows certain names/aliases from long ago that are forbidden from being publicly uttered, but I don't think I'll have to worry about them ever doing that, so I doubt there's going to be many I'll actually have an issue with. I think. ...Actually, better yet, should probably check in with me if it's okay to use another alias/name in public just in case, please.
TWO ( BIRTHDAY ): March 8th
THREE ( ZODIAC SIGN ): Pisces
FOUR ( HEIGHT ): 172.72cm
FIVE ( HOBBIES ): Aside from writing? Playing video games, listening to music, watching stuff, reading comics/webcomics/etc. ...I should really get back into drawing...
SEVEN ( FAVOURITE BOOKS ): Ha ha ahaha ha ha... I don't remember. It's been a while since I've actually read a novel. ...Huh? I'm just feeling self-conscious over my real answer? Now whatever gave you that idea...?
EIGHT ( LAST SONG LISTENED TO ): Green Garden First heard this song in an anthropology course I took years ago. The instructor would play this song almost every morning before the start of class. Even though I was super tired, my face buried into my arms on the desk, I'd still somewhat try to rhythmically move to it. It hadn't taken long for me to decide that I HAD TO find out what it was called, but instead of asking my instructor (haha, social anxiety), I tried to pay attention to the lyrics, store 'em in my head for later, and then attempted to search the song using said lyrics when I got home. And now it's become a permanent addition to the list of songs I'll listen to every so often. Plus, I like to think it's a song that fits my Petey. Have definitely listened to it in the past while writing starters/replies or just working on various pages/info before.
NINE ( LAST SHOW WATCHED ): SO, I just finished watching-- Uhhh... Don't worry about it. All you need to know is I've watched many things, and am still juggling through several other things that I'm currently watching, and keep considering adding even more to the list.
TEN ( INSPIRATION FOR MUSE ): Music tends to play a part in inspiration. It used to have a larger role when I'd listen to his boss themes years ago and it'd get me all pumped and ready to write! It also depended on the scenario for the RP, too. Like if it was a more peaceful encounter/interaction, my usual go-to was 'Have a Nice Talk' from Bowser's Inside Story (even though Petey never appeared in that game). Otherwise, if it was something more battle or action-y oriented, then I'd listen to something at least somewhat fitting! If the interaction's a crossover one (which will be the case a majority of the time), I might listen to something fitting from whatever my partner's muse's series for the scenario (if applicable, and I like the theme and/or think it fits the tone/mood). These days, music doesn't have as big of an effect as before, and the music used for inspiration is more varied. Otherwise--whether they're directly related to the muse I'm playing or not--watching stuff, reading things, playing games, and listening to voicelines also plays a role in drawing inspiration.
ELEVEN ( MEANING BEHIND YOUR URL ): Matching URL with my friend! Also refers to my portrayal of Petey being a prince/king/royalty from headcanons and the story we were thinking about doing here together.
5 notes · View notes
blackhakumen · 3 years
Text
Mini Fanfic #707: The Slap (Super Smash Bros Ultimate)
2:23 p.m. at Smash's Mansion.......
Bowser: ('Scoffs') I don't believe your ass already, Ridley. There's no way you actually managed to get a lady's number!
Ridley: (Glares at Bowser) Why? You think just because I'm some monsterous space pirate, I wouldn't have any chances on scoring with anyone?
Hades: (Rolled his Eyes) You practically put the words right out of our mouths on that one.....
Ganondorf: You're appearance alone does seem more threatening.in the eyes, compare to the rest of us.
Bowser: (Gives Ridley a Smug Look on His Face) We have more chances of getting any woman than you wish you can.
Ridley: Really? (Crosses his Arms Together) Then by all means, tell me what exactly you imbeciles have to impress the ladies that I don't!?
Ganondorf: Well, I have muscles, dark magic, a evil, dominate personality....
Bowser: I can kidnap any princess no problem. (Shutters a Little in Fear) As long as it isn't Daisy.....
Hades: (Puts on the Most Smug Like Grin He Ever Had) Do you have any idea who you're asking this to? I'm motherfucking Hades! I can get any woman I want with little to no effort.
Sephiroth: (Smirks Confidently While Holding Onto a Cheerful Pichu in his Arms) I'm already a fan favorite in this town. Isn't that right, son?
Pichu: (Happily Cheers) Pichu!~
Mewtwo: (Crosses his Arm While in an Uninterested Manner) Love and romances are beyond my interest......
Dark Samus: ...................................
Bowser: See, even Dark Samus gas a chance at getting more numbers than you can!
Ridley: ('Groans') Forget I asked.....All I know is that I have enough charm and personality to get as much beautiful ladies than you hooligans can ever dream of havi- (Sudden Feels Someone Tapping his Shoulder) Hm? (Turns Around at the Person) What do you- (Eyes Widened at the Person) want?
The person in question was none other than Chun-Li, who is now glaring harshly at the space pirate in complete silence.
Bowser: (Eyes Widened at the Woman Presence) Holy shit, is that Chun-Li-
Ganondorf: (Sliently Shushes at Bowser)
Ridley: (Confused at the Woman Glaring at Him as he Slowly Raises his Finger Up) Uhhhhhhh.........Can I....help you-
Then, without warning, Chun-Li suddenly gives the space pirate three, stinging slaps across the face. The third slap she delivered was so hard that it caused Ridley to crash on the club's table.
Bowser: (Immediately Got Up From the Table Along with Everyone Else) Oh shit!
Ganondorf: That escalated quickly.....
Sephiroth: (Still Holding Onto Pichu) It's more unexpected if anything..........
Mewtwo: Whatever Ridley did to her, he deserves it.
Dark Samus: ...............................
Ridley: (Groans and Winces in Pain from the Slaps he Has Gotten) What did I....do......
Chun-Li: That...was for murdering Samus' parents, you heartless monster! (Gives Ridley One Final Glare Before Walking Away) ('Hmph')
'A Bit of Silence'
Bowser: Soooooooooooo uhhh.......('Clicks is Tongue') You guys wanna talk about what just happened, or-
Hades: Mheheheheh....Aheheheheh....AH!-
Meanwhile at the Living Room.......
Samus: (Smiles Softly as She Sees her Girlfriend Making her Way to the Sofa) Hey there, beautiful stranger~ What took you so long? And where your bottle of water?
Chun-Li: I uh.... (Looks Down While Shyly Twiddling her Fingers Around) Didn't get the water bottle......
Samus: Really? How come?
Chun-Li: Well.....you see, I didn't get it because.... u-ummmm...........(Finally Sighs in Defeat) I can't lie to you like this, Sammy......
Samus: (Frowns a Little in Worry) What do you mean? What's wrong?
Chun-Li: (Takes a Deep Breath Before Speaking) I didn't go to the kitchen to get water. I....went to the dining halls to see one of your mortal enemies, Ridley, in person. A-And by seeing him in person, I mean....... slapping him across the face.....
Samus: (Eyes Widened in Complete Surprised) You bitch slapped Ridley!?
Chun-Li: I-I-I wouldn't go as far as to put it like that! But....('Sigh') If you insist, then yeah..... it's the truth.
Samus: (Almost at a Loss of Words) Holy shit.........
Chun-Li: (Immediately Feels Terrible as She Bows at Samus) Gomenasai! I didn't mean to do something like that! I felt really bad about what happened to your parents and, well, I-
Before Chun-Li could even finish her sentence and much to her very surprise, Samus gives her a sudden yet loving and passionate kiss on the laps, which lasted about a few seconds before she slowly pulling away.
Samus: (Takes a Deep Breath Before Speaking) I love you~
Chun-Li: (Immediately Blushes Bright Red) Really? I-I-I mean!.... Y-You're not... really mad at me?
Samus: What? (Chuckles Lightly) Of course I'm not mad at you, 'hon. I was more surprised that you actually went over there and did it if anything. That and....(Smiles Softly While Blushing Herself) It really made me happy that you did all of this for me. I mean, I know everyone else in this mansionwould've done the same for me, but..... I'm still thankful.
Chun-Li: (Stares at Samus for a Few Seconds Before Smiling Softly Herself) Sammy~ You don't need to thank me for something like that. I just....Did what I thought was right....or at least justifiable. I mean, really, take it from someone who dealt with someone taking their love ones away from them in a young age. Or.....more so.....(Frowns a Little) a father......
Samus: (Begins to Frown as Well) Oh no. I'm so sorry. Who was the guy who did that to you?
Chun-Li: ('Sigh') An evil dictator name, Bison. Hate him with a passionate.....But at least he's finally dead now. So I don't have to worry about him anymore.
Samus: That's good at least. Again, I'm really sorry you had to go through with all of that...... Losing your own father and everything......
Chun-Li: (Smiles Softly) It's okay, Samus. I may still miss him to this very day, but......in a way, his passing......kind of helped that there's more to life than just mourning and being miserable. I may had some stressful times along the way, sure, but....thanks to a few of my closest friends, colleagues, and Li Fein, I still manage to pull through in the end and I'm proud of myself for that.
Samus: (Smiles Softly) As you should be. You are the Strongest Woman in the World after all. (Winks at Chun-Li)
Chun-Li: (Giggles Softly While Blushing) Oh geez....People still call me that nowadays?
Samus: Oh definitely. You do have some impressive feats in your arsenal.
Chun-Li: Maybe. (Gently Holds Samus' Hand with Two of Hers) But I believe you're just as strong as me and any woman in this world. I know losing a love one and...even living with someone who harmed them in the first place, can be pretty tough at times. But as long as you can help your head held high and keep living life to the very fullest, I'm positive you'll continue doing just fine in this world. Don't you think?
Samus: (Simply.Nodded in Agreement) I understand it completely thanks to you. And hey, if you ever feel like you need someone to talk to and all of that, I'm always here for you.
Chun-Li: (Happily Nodded as Well) Thank you so much....... S-So uh....
Samus: Hm? What's up?
Chun-Li: After that kiss you gave me.....(Starts Blushing Again) You really meant it when you said you love me?~
Samus: (Starts Blushing Herself) Oh! Uhh.....Yeah. I....guess I really did. (Chuckles Lightly While Rubbing the Back of Her Head Back and Forth) Sorry about saying it out of nowher-
Before Samus could even finish that sentence, Chun-Li pulls her in and gives her a loving, passionate Kiss on the lips. Causing the Bounty Hunter's blush to turn bright red.
Chun-Li: (Pulls Away From Samus For a Few Seconds While Giving her a Playful Smirk on her Face) Don't be. I love you too, Sammy~
Samus: (Almost Speechless) C-C-C-Cool- (Gets Pulled into Another Kissing Session with the Strongest Woman in the World)
Bonus
Hades: (Continues Laughing his Ass Off at Ridley) AHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!
Ridley: (Sighs in Annoyance as He Rubs his Slapped Cheek Up and Down) Are you done laughing now or-
Hades: (Holds his Finger Up as He's Still Laughing at the Still Annoyed Space Pirate) HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! ('Inhales Deep Breath') AHHHHH!- (Suddenly and Finally Calms Himself Down) All done now.
Ridley: Finally-
Hades: HA! Now I'm done.
Ridley: (Growls at the God of the Underworld)
Ganondorf: Okay! As entertaining as that situation was, I think it's about time we start figuring all of this out.
Bowser: (Smirks Smugly at Ridley While Snickering) Yeah. Like wondering what you did to piss off "the Strongest Woman in the World"
Ridley: (Glares at Bowser) I DON'T KNOW, OKAY!? Seriously, she just slapped me and blamed me for killing Samus' parents-
Hades: Which you definitely did, by the way.
Ridley: SHUT UP! A-And another thing......(Starts Getting Flabbergasted) I-I didn't even know the woman who Samus was!!
Ganondorf: Yeah. How does she knows who the Bounty Hunter is anyways?
Mewtwo: They're in the romance relationship with one another.
Ganondorf: (Turns to Mewtwo With Genuine Surprised in his Eyes) Wait. Seriously?
Mewtwo: (Simply Nodded) That's right. Why else would a veteran Street Fighter go as far as to slap someone like Ridley across the face three times? It's one of the many ways for any partner to defend their love ones honor, after all.
Bowser: Huh. (Chuckles Lightly) Well, good on Samus for scoring someone like her.
Ridley: (Still Irritated).Yeah. Sure. Good for her. Who gives a shit!? I'm still in pain here!
Hades: Oh give it a rest already, you blantent pussy. So you got bitch slapped by your arch nemesis' girlfriend. Big deal! You can just walk it off and-
Before Hades can finish his sentence, one of Dark Pit's girlfriends, Misako, comes out of nowhere and gives him a hard hitting punch in the gut, followed by a flying kick to the face by Kyoko, another one of Dark Pit's girlfriends, instantly causing poor God to fall down into the ground in utter pain.
Hades: (Groans in Pain)
Misako: (Walks Up to the Beaten Hades) That was for making our Angel Boi watch Boku no Pico, jackass! (Gives Hades a Middle Finger Before Walking Off)
Kyoko: (Turns Away While Crossing her Arms and Following Misako Behind) ('Hmph')
Sephiroth: (Still Holding Onto a Giggling Pichu) Well, what do you know? Another unexpected chain of events.
Bowser: (Chuckles Lightly) Yeah. And it's two for the price of one.
Hades: That brat.....punched me in the gut......Why.....Why would she punched me in the gut?........
Ridley: Not so funny getting your ass kicked, doesn't it?
@keyenuta
@26shann
@caleb13frede
@cyber-wildcat
@miki-13
@ma-lemons
@albion-93
17 notes · View notes