🍭📚 — ‘ 𝘪 𝘢𝘭𝘮𝘰𝘴𝘵 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘸𝘦 𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘯'𝘵 𝘧𝘶𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘪𝘱 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘸𝘦 𝘵𝘢𝘭𝘬 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴. ’

hi! im! inconsolable!!! the darling @schleckermaul gifted me this absolutely BEAUTIFUL commission of breaklan on a date for my birthday! and i LOVE it aaaaaaaa! 😭 the outfits are so perfectly picked out, the scenery is cozy and pretty and nostalgic, and the atmosphere is delightfully comfortable, intimate, and soft i just can't. i'll simply evaporate. it's too good!!! my greatest thanks to astal-art for the lovely work, and of course the sweetest pea for the incredibly thoughtful gift. 💖

end of oct

since my last post:

went with my parents to toyota north hollywood with the intention of test driving a corolla cross hybrid - they are looking to replace their 2003 highlander. my parents had purchased the highlander in 2003, a lexus sedan in 2013, so it *made sense* to purchase another car in 2023 lol. instead, we walked out purchasing a gas rav4. it was a 5 hour process, and i left early because i had I&I's wedding to attend. it's a cute panda color car but i haven't had the chance to drive it yet. there was a lot of negotiating on the price; they would not waiver on the markups and we ended up purchasing the car for about 11% over sticker price. i didn't get a chance to do much research before the car buying process and it seemed my dad just wanted to get the process over with because i was in town. so, we got an OK price - not the best but wasn't overly ripped off either

my ultrasound results came back fairly normal. the gyno office also looked at my results and said things are fine now, and to do a follow up ultrasound in 6 months. the transvaginal thing wasn't too bad. there is a 14mm echogenic area around my right ovary that may represent a small benign ovarian dermoid. i should keep better track, but i think i feel the most tension during ovulation. i have scheduled an in-person visit with my PCP in january to do a physical examination and pap smear.

I&I's wedding was very sweet, my first and last korean wedding (as i have no other korean friends). we were surprised that we got invited because the wedding was pretty intimate (<120 people) and we haven't kept in touch besides a few zooms for years. G&I got ready at M's place, where she helped me do make up. it was much heavier than usual, so i felt uncomfortable looking in the mirror that night lol.

the stress of everything (matt's long working hours - he again had to work a 100+ hour week, job search failures, not moving at the same speeds because of his work hours, constant state of limbo, also my moms daily questioning of his job prospects) had me feeling extremely overwhelmed after this whole redlands incident. i had asked for chatgpt to give me some advice, which it churned out very insightful words- the thing i struggle with most is having *realistic* expectations. it's been difficult for me to come to terms with choosing to stay in NYC longer than i want to, because i feel we should be more in control of our situation after training. anyway, recently i have taken job searching into my own hands. now there is a better understanding of what jobs matt is looking for. i have way more time and energy to search for jobs/email people and monitor job postings. norcal, we may be coming for ya. thanks chatgpt for helping me with writing cover letters and for being a virtual therapist.

i arrived in NYC last wednesday morning (red eye flight), and we had a weekend getaway at the same machimoodus getaway cabin on saturday. hertz gave us a chevy bolt this time. it was a little stressful to figure out the charging situation (and it charges much much more slowly than a tesla). i actually quite enjoyed driving the car and may consider purchasing a non-tesla EV in the future. we got to hike and see beautiful fall foliage. prepared hot pot this time, and a yummy miso-garlic butter pepper steak (marion grasby recipe). i also enjoyed skim reading the "how to get away book" written by the getaway founders.

i saw my japanese friends M&K yesterday, and got to meet baby girl E. it was about a 3 hour hangout, and we were at a coffee shop's rooftop the entire time. we stumbled across this coffee shop randomly and it worked out perfectly. the rooftop was private, spacious and the weather was great. per my usual self, i was very nervous to meet them again because i had not seen or talked to them much in 4 years. my social anxiety is dormant more frequently in my 30s, but it still reactivates often enough haha.

there were two friend's bdays this month: S & K. K was supposed to meet us at the getaway, but ultimately she and M have decided to break up. it was one of the hardest decisions she's had to make and it's been a difficult time for her.