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#i build a little headcanon in my head that out of all communities ghosts are the most accepting?? of this strange development
doodlesforfics · 2 years
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Who’s Old Now? by @lirabuswavi​ (um i hope i tagged the right person, cause like im 80% sure you are same ao3 lirabuswavi, if not im sorry <;D)
ok this one-shot literally opened my eyes to sheer chaos possibility of Adult!Fenton adopting kid Billy B. while Teenager!Phantom being mistaken as Shazam’s ward and just ladskjsdk??? superhero/magic/ghost community would not be prepared. amazing fic. such fun.
and some doodles inspired by the fic
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let lil Billy have retired ghost superhero possibly eldritch overpowered being Phantom as protective Dad.
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roran01 · 5 months
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I'm bored and I can't find motivation to draw, have my headcanons for Romania instead, some of these are simping and cringe, enjoy:
(Also adding a image to be easier to find this post cause for some stupid reason tumblr only shows posts with images in my blog's search bar now, tags are useless)
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1) Three words for this guy: 🌟Tall, blonde and beautiful.🌟
2) He's a fashion genius or a fashion disaster depending on your view but he still got drip.
His color choices are black and red (like no shite), sometimes blue for the jeans and warm colors in general, white and grey from time to time.
3) I'd consider him quite mixed, with some ethnicities leaving a noticeable influence but latin conquers most of his bloodline nowadays.
The slavic tendencies come out whenever he gets drunk.
4) Folks see him as eccentric... they're right.
5) He's one of the few countries with particular traits that are uncommon to the rest of the nations and society in general.
I could say it's magic if I want to be basic about it, but I don't, so here's some of them:
His eyes can see supernaturals like spirits, fairies, ghosts and demons although they rarely make their existence know nowadays.
Technically since he's a vampire that would make him one as well. (Actually I'll make a post about this)
He can communicate with the animals and understand them but won't act on it to not look crazy. So he doesn't visit the zoo too often.
He's interested in dark magic so you can say he vibes with the dark side too. In addition he's way too casual about the creepy factor of some things.
He can poses fire because I said so.
6) Besides the quirks about paranormal, he's charming, both in looks and personality as well until you get to know him better, then he gets a little silly that could mean anything.
The only canon thing I adopted from him is that he's mischievous, but I could make him worse :3
7) He's good with kids, he'd be one of those cool parents if he had any. (I could make parent headcanons)
8) He likes traditional food the best, anything with meat and potatoes but to be frank no one can resist pizza from time to time. He doesn't eat too salty, makes him thirsty easily.
He like savarine as a sweet and usually buys them, but if he wants home made he would chose lemon cake (snow white).
To be honest he eats a lot but at least he keeps himself in shape.
"What do you mean this bread has sugar in it??" He doesn't like american bread.
9) And he definitely is lean build, someone who survived 2 empires and russia isn't gonna be skinny af just because he doesn't show it.
My vision says his body beats the twink allegations, his face not so much... he's a twunk.
10) Speaking of, I like to think he does gymnastics and extreme sports for the thrill.
11) His imagination is wild so if he'd have a modern job it should be something that expands on it.
Like a writer for books or movies. He can cook well too (and mix all kinds of potions) so maybe a chef at a restaurant, Fashion artist, Modeling... I go for the writer though.
12) He has some scars on his body, most are small and unnoticeable but he's too self conscious about them so he's not wearing a lot of revealing clothes, at least he doesn't sweat much during summer.
Two noticeable scars are on his shoulder blades and one besides the left lilac region to lumbar.
The ones on his back I like to think of them as a metaphor for broken wings. The one below his abdomen happened due to his separation from Moldova.
13) Cat person, cat behavior and cat lover. He has at least 2 cats in his house and a little bat because why not?
One of the cats is a lynx because that's his national animal, but also because it's like having dog size cat, a big pile of fluff to snuggle on rainy day, a purring machine against your head and belly (I'm projecting a lot I know)
14) His relationship with his slavic neighbors, mainly balkans, is very capybara coded. He's just chilling around and none of them has any business with him nowadays. He's considered part of the family despite Romania being latin. He may feel more accepted by them than his family from west sometimes.
15) His relationship with his blood relative is kinda mixed and they don't communicate often, assumingly because of his status but proly because of the land distance as well.
He used to look up to them and hoped to be accepted and recognized as a romance country in the past. One out of two happened, he's content enough with that.
16) He drinks a fuck ton of red wine.
17) His fangs are the only teeth that can still fall and regrow, he's able to move and retract them.
18) The pupils in his eyes are vertical stilts that expand and contract, the thinner they get the more blurry everything besides the focus point becomes. Sometimes he wears glasses for that.
Funny thing about his pupils is that they can expand so much it cover the whole Iris. His eyes can also glow in the dark sometimes.
19) In human age he's 23.
20) He loves parks, a lot.
21) Keeps his house clean except his kitchen, until he has guests over. If uninvited you're not allowed in the kitchen.
22) Sleep schedule worse than you've seen in college. Get him to bed or he gets grumpy af.
23) Coffee addict because of that.
24) He doesn't like cold, but there's melancholic beauty in the landscape whenever it's night time and only the tree lights give an ounce of warmth during winter. It's a bittersweet sensation he can't describe properly, it's the same during rainy days or stormy nights. He likes it despite the ache feeling it gives.
25) Sunny days are enjoyable for many of his activities but he's usually more active during the night, which is unfortunate because he ends up sleeping too much during daytime and feeling awful for "wasting time" in bed.
26) His eye color switches from black to red sometimes.
27) Sexually speaking, he's definitely swinging both ways and sideways.
28) If he'd be a yōkai then it's Kitsune (nine tails fox) fits him the most. Also because I like to think he'd have a double pair of fangs from it.
29) I main ship him with: Bulgaria and Norway. Side ships: Greece and Hungary. Crack ships: Prussia, Japan, Belarus. Platonical: Egypt cause I like their aesthetics together.
30) But talking about how compatible he is with other characters. I'd say based on canon he is with Bulgaria. Based on history he'll be with Serbia (dude barely exists). Based on his zodiac sign he's with Hungary (the irony). Based on his mbti he's with either Norway or Japan.
31) Speaking of zodiac signs, he's a Sagittarius. (Although it's hard to identify precisely the "birthday" of countries, so I just go with their national days and his is on Dec 1) if you're into astrology a lot then he also has his moon in scorpio.
32) He is inclined to be overprotective for his close ones ever since he lost Moldova to Russia. He does it automatically without knowing until someone points it out.
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This may get updated from time to time
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cactikiki · 5 months
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GGY headcanons because I've been thinking a little...
==
Greg met Tony and Ellis in September, right at the start of the school year. He was alone and didn't know where to go, but Tony was there like, "Hey, this new kid's lonely. I think we should check on him."
Tony is nice, but also nosy. He likes knowing people, inside and out
Tony finds new kids especially interesting. There's usually more to them being there than others, who just go to the school because they live nearby or thought it was a good school.
This kid, their family, moved here for a reason... Why?
Hurricane doesn't have anything much going for it. While yes, it's the birthplace of Fazbear Entertainment and has the very first, original Pizzaplex, people don't usually move to the town just for that. Parents wouldn't usually do that.
So there's a story there! Everyone has a story.
As for why Gregory's parents moved at all... He has well-off parents who wanted to work with Fazbear Entertainment. Huge economic opportunity. So they moved in from Salt Lake City, you go to Hurricane now my boy
The whole reason Gregory gets glitchtrapped is because of his parents. Karma got them in the end ig....
Gregory is a good friend to both Ellis and Tony. They click immediately, like they've known Greg for years. They know his full name, but Gregory never really went by it back then, sticking with simply Greg (he would've went by 'Gregory' in SB because he forgot he even had that nickname at all.... and while in and out of consciousness before that, even. So Cassie only ever knew him as Gregory)
Rab wasn't around the whole time, lucky for Gregory. He got to know the duo for a few months before that, got close, and clicked super well with them. So he did have a close connection with them before things went wrong, unlike Cassie who he would've gotten less connection with since he didn't really know her (and when he'd met her, he'd just broken free of being controlled for a few hours, with no memory of any events).
Summer came, and Gregory got to test a Freddy's VR game bc of his parents. He would've begged them too, "It's the least you can do for me. You guys don't spend any time with me! Let me come with you to the company building and test the game, pleaseee?"
Something went wrong at the target audience testing. One of the QA testers kept watching him, a blonde woman with green eyes... She was odd, but Gregory brushed the thought away.
That was, until a sharp migraine hit his head, and everything started to go fuzzy from there.
School came back around in September, and GGY happened. Greg acted slightly differently after summer, but it was probably just normal stuff. Right? It's not like there were any stark differences in personality. That's what Tony thought at least, until he dug too deep and... yeah.
To Ellis, his two best friends just went missing. That's all there was, forever, and he just had to deal with that. They were never coming back.
As for Tony, he'd haunt Greg and probably can't quite believe there's life after death
Gregory, at this point, he doesn't remember. So shit falls off shelves, and he hears his name whispered, and he's like, 'huh. must've been the wind... unless, maybe Vanessa's grandma is here? omg Ness, holy shit come here. I think your grandma's ghost is here??"
But it'd get serious when he finds out the truth. When he realises. When he starts getting hurt by this ghost. He tries to communicate (since my Greg is a paranormal believer and Tony owned a DR60 recorder because of him, while Greg owns a REM-pod). Tony is always angry. He's always upset. Gregory finds himself permanently haunted by him.
Rab racked up a few bodies while he was controlling Gregory; therapists, Tony, his parents, and two random kids he didn't even know the name of. Vanny dealt with the rest. Those mostly went to the Tangle, though; Tony was the only one to have a close enough connection to get stuck attached to Greg.
==
That's all I really have rn, idk I wanted to post this somewhere sjhdjbrkfnfm I had thoughts. Many thoughts. I will continue to have thoughts.
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Welp, made another thing for @petrichormeraki ‘s Hermit!tommy au. be warned that this is only a part 1 cause i haven’t finished the whole thing and i need to get my computer looked at so i won’t be able to finish it yet but here’s some of it at least
Disclaimers here are that I only know the general idea of Xisuma’s base and that there’s a honey farm somewhere, but I took liberties with how it is for the story. Also, headcanon that I made specifically just because I want it to happen, canon deaths that don’t end up with a ghost make the person lose a piece of their soul until it can’t support them fully anymore. Then that piece ends up somewhere else. Maybe that’s why the compasses work. But more I just want something like what happens in this fic. For the hurt/comfort.
When Tommy first joined the Hermits accidentally, he hated being around Xisuma. Not only was he the admin of the server, the one who held the most power, but for whatever reason, this guy decided to look like a bee. It was worse when Tommy learned he almost changed up to look like a Strider, but then just went back to a bee. At the very least it wasn’t easy to run into the guy.
It was more the problem of his base. The coolest places and the ones Tommy most liked to visit were the ones in the jungle, especially since the old base he was living in was built there. With no elytra, at least not one he used for more than gliding, Tommy got lost when in the more natural parts of the biomes. And when that happened, he tended to accidentally find Xisuma’s base.
So much of it was bee themed that Tommy disliked it. It reminded him too much of what he left behind, but couldn’t get back. Having the compass was as much as Tommy was willing to have to remind him.
But one day Tommy got killed when he wasn’t being careful. He wasn’t too worried about it, especially after a message in his new communicator had a message from a hermit who picked up his stuff and put it in a chest. They didn’t really have the inventory space to bring it to him and we’re busy enough they couldn’t stay, but it was fine. A chest was the standard.
But right now, the problem was getting to the chest. Not only was it somewhere in the jungle, but it was also most of his gear. Tommy didn’t really have many good backups, never wanting something that someone could take, even though he knows the hermits would never do that. Probably. He’s still wary just to be safe. The most he has in storage is some gold armor for when he goes into the nether.
Tommy donned a mixture of gold and worn iron armor and a mostly used sword to get his stuff. He’s sure he knows the way to his gear until he doesn’t. With the monsters tougher than at his old home, Tommy is worried about dying again as the sun starts to set. He rushed through the jungle a bit faster until he ran into it. Xisuma’s base. Tommy was going to pass it by when monsters started to spawn, with him getting really unlucky and one zombie spawning with full enchanted armor.
Not wanting to die, Tommy scrambled his way into Xisuma’s base. He sighed once he was in a safe place, though upset that he would have to spend the night in such a place.
With nothing much better to do other than sitting, which Tommy hated doing, he started to walk around and explore Xisuma’s base. Close up, it was actually okay. The bee theme designs weren’t as prominent, and all the towers and buildings had farms inside them which were fun to watch. The one problem was the honey farm. This one definitely had a lot to do with bees. Tommy was going to just run by it when a bee popped out.
Tommy actually paused at that. Then smiled. Bees only game out during the day, which meant he could leave. He smiled and ran out of there and went outside to see… it was still night?
Now confused, Tommy went back to the bee farm. He was beginning to think maybe he just imagined it, but then he saw the bee still there. He watched as it kept bopping its head against the glass, ignoring the flower with it and not going back in its hive.
Puzzled, Tommy just watched the bee until he heard the noise of someone using a firework. The sound caught Tommy’s attention, and he looked away. When he turned back, the bee was gone. After looking there for a few seconds, Tommy shrugged and started to walk away. But even then, he still kept looking back, so much that he didn’t notice Xisuma until he ran into the man.
Tommy froze up when he saw the admin standing in front of him, but instead of anything Dream might have done or said, Xisuma spoke in a kind voice. “Oh, sorry Tommy, I didn’t see you there. Were you looking for me?”
Tommy didn’t speak for a little bit until he heard the pop of a bee leaving its hive. “Uh, I just got lost and holed up here, cus I died and was trying to get to my stuff and that one guy isn’t around to sleep. Also one of your bees is fuckin’ weird.”
Xisuma scolded the boy for cussing, then offered to help Tommy get to his stuff. He mostly ignored the bee comment until there was the noise of something softly hitting glass again. Xisuma walked over to the farm and Tommy followed.
“See! Isn’t it supposed to not do that?” Tommy asked, to confused by the mob to be scared of Xisuma or want to leave the bee area.
Xisuma nodded slightly, watching the bee’s odd behavior. “Maybe it somehow got linked to another hive or nest and is trying to get there.”
“So what, you’re gonna let it out?” Tommy asked, bristling a little at the idea.
Xisuma nodded again. “It’s probably the only way we could be sure. I can always breed up another if it leaves.”
The admin took out a silk touch pick and broke the glass. The bee flew out and the glass was replaced so the other bees that had not left the hive just yet wouldn't also escape. Instead of the bee trying to fly out of the base, it flew towards Tommy and hovered around him.
Tommy went rigid as the bee flew towards him. He was sure it would keep going, but instead it stuck around him. “What the fuck do you want then?” He asked the mob even though it couldn’t respond. “I don’t have any of those prissy flowers so bug off.”
But the bee didn’t listen. It seemed quite pleased to stick with him. Tommy nearly drew his sword to kill it, but he wasn’t sure he could bring himself to actually his the thing with what it represented to him. Plus Xisuma might get mad and it could break his farm. “Can you just help me get my stuff, maybe it’ll leave once we’re outside.”
Not knowing what else he could say, Xisuma agreed to that. He could tell that something about bees was a sore subject for Tommy. The way he stiffened up around them and also around him. It was part of why he was so surprised to see the boy.
After a bit of walking, Tommy reached the chest of his gear and equipped and stored everything in his inventory. The bee happily bopped up against him and once again Tommy thought about killing it. But instead he just started wandering home, the bee following right behind.
The following day, Xisuma showed up to check on Tommy. While he wasn’t please to see the admin, Tommy at least accepted the gift of a bee hive, especially after his apparent new pet bee would not stop bopping its head against him. Hopefully the hive would give it somewhere to live and it would stop.
Tommy thanked Xisuma for the gift before shoving him out the door, glad for the lack of resistance the admin gave. Then, turning back to the rest of the hobbit hole he moved into, Tommy plopped down the hive right in the middle of the room. “There. Go in there and stop bothering me.”
But the bee didn’t listen, it just kept bopping it’s little fuzzy head against Tommy. Angry now, Tommy grabbed the bee, held it eye level, and looked right into its eyes. “You’re going to stop annoying me and go in that hive, got it?! I’m sick of you flying around me!”
He then let the now trembling mob go and it flew into the new hive. Tommy almost felt regretful about yelling at it. Almost. Grumbling, he went over to his bed to rest now that there wasn’t much to keep him up. Tommy set down his gear nearby, and placed his closed compass on the bed.
With all this bee stuff, Tommy couldn’t help but look at the object. After hesitating for a few moments, he grabbed the item and opened the lid. Inside, the needle danced wildly, not sure how to point with its location in another dimension. Tommy gave a sad sigh and was about to close it again when the needle stopped spinning. It clearly pointed in one direction for a few seconds. Tommy’s eyes widened and he started to turn towards where the needle was trying to guide him, but then it went back to dancing about.
Tommy looked at it confused, before realizing it still might change again. Tubbo may have found a way here. He ran in the direction the needle had been pointing and tripped over the new hive he had placed, cursing as he hit the floor. He looked back up at it to hit it once or something, but the compass has steadied itself again, the needle pointing the other direction, right towards the hive.
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ourstarscollided · 3 years
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jatp fanworks appreciation - day 1 (writers)
motivation - so in true me fashion and my aversion to brevity, i've made three (3) posts (see also artists, gifs/edits) to celebrate the wonderful people in this fandom who have made my jatp tumblr experience what it is; a community of people who simply shout into the void about their love of a ghost band and their fearless female leader. i've enjoyed simply being on the sidelines admiring everyone's love for the show, but i thought this would be a good time to really show my appreciation for all these wonderful people, because if i've learned anything from this pandemic, it's that there is NEVER a wrong time to tell someone that they are simply ✨the best✨.
disclaimer: i don't interact with most of these people personally and i simply absorb their content from afar and scream about how wonderful they are in the tags.
This list kind of became a fic rec, so if you're looking for some wonderful fics to read (or reread), I've also included my favs from the author here as well.
Okay this is gonna get a little long so please bear with me. But I just wanted to preamble this by saying that the fanfiction written by the jatp fandom is what resparked my love for reading fiction after about 3-4 years of not reading for leisure (be an adult they said. it'll be fun they said.). So I'm really grateful for that? I don't interact with a lot of people, just because it makes me a little anxious, but I will constantly yell about your content in the tags as if I were on a set of bleachers with a megaphone.
I also know there are so many wonderful fic writers out there (on Tumblr and not on Tumblr) that make amazing pieces of work, and this is just a tiny peek into that, and is not at all conclusive.
Without further ado here are some writers who live rent free in my head, in alphabetical order, so feel free to just skip to your name to avoid my rambling:
@bluefirewrites -> your Merry Ex-Mas fic had me on the edge of my seat every single time you updated. I am so in love with how you wrote the characters into this and at how many words you churned out for this fic. This was filled with so much adventure, and it was really welcome during a time when the world wasn't allowed to travel. And I simply love all the other drabbles and fics you write, but I especially enjoy the hilarity of Ray Molina, Crime Scene Photographer and Matchmaker.
@captainkippen -> I'm pretty sure Love Drunk was one of the first fics I ever read in this fandom. Your stories and your writing feel so goddamn real and I find myself so immersed in the worlds that you've created. I have reread most of your jatp fics and I still manage to find myself stupidly grinning at my phone each time. Your stories flow so easily and are such perfect characterizations of the characters we know from the show, but elevated to fit into your verse. I cannot say enough how wonderful your writing is and how talented you are!! (also a slight nudge that I am still very much following along with The Key and the Crown and I hope you continue it!)
@catty-words -> Your???? Exhaustive??? Music??? Lists???? The amount of work and dedication and microanalyzing that you put into pulling out every detail from each scene is so admirable. You not only manage to find the details, but you also give us EVIDENCE via your intricately selected gifs. You could've just put the video of the performance, but no, you take your time to find that specific 1 second shot to emphasize your point. And your little fics that you sometimes throw out into the world? They're so beautiful, and so fun to read and I enjoy them so much! (I am STILL screaming about this band's a snack) Thank you for validating my yelling in the tags, and for feeding my hyperfixation to this show. (I'm sad these lists are ending soon, but it's about the journey ya know?)
@lydias--stiles -> I don't even know what to say here because I've yelled so much about your fics that I feel like there's really nothing else to yell. Your Road Trip AU was also one of the first ones I read in this fandom, and really just made me go absolutely feral. Pretty sure I absorbed the rest of your fics in an ungodly amount of time and I just simply think you are incredibly skilled and talented. Every time you post a new fic I always wonder what it's like to be in your head because the ideas you come up with are so unique and so well thought out. Thank you for all the art you create for this show, I will constantly be in awe of you. (Special shoutout to the 5+1 fic that became a 31 chapter monster)
@pearlcaddy -> This list would not be complete if I didn't mention you. First of all, thank you for suggesting this wonderful week, it has been so lovely to see so much love being spread around today. Secondly, I never thought I'd find myself reading a Buffy or a Wizarding World crossover fic, considering I know nothing about those two things. And yet I found myself on various nights after work at 3 in the morning just silently screaming and/or crying into my phone. Your writing is so insane. Your world building is so insane. Your banter/dialogue is insane. The way you capture the love between Julie/Luke in different universes is so perfect. Thank you for gifting us these beautiful pieces of art, and I hope you know that you have at least made one person (me) a very happy reader. I also really admire your dedication to "this will only be a oneshot", only to write like 4 other POVs for it. (Special shoutout to 100 Bad Days)
@ruzek-halstead -> Literally every single fic you have written lives rent free in my head. The way you've managed to build this universe of different Julies and Lukes, and each one still captures the essence of them is astounding. You've extended their characters beyond what we know from the show and I am just in awe of everything you write. Please know that dead of night is both triggering to me and yet the most hilarious thing I have read. (Special shoutout to the Fake Dating Christmas AU and of course the Cinderella Story AU)
@serendipitee -> Your stories and your writing are absolutely magical. I think Write It Down was one of the first multi-chapter fics that I followed super closely and whenever you updated, I would literally drop what I was doing and read it instantly. You have such a way of building the plot and the characters for all of your fics and drabbles, and making the reader just want more. Please know that I am so obsessed with Oh, She Waltzed With the Dead and I cannot wait to see where you take the story!
@sunsetcurbed -> I have no words for your writing. I am simply in awe every time I read something from you. The way you've got down Alex and Willie's voice to a tee is so crazy good. You write their characters and their stories with such grace and care, especially with how you approach the topic of mental health. Thank you for all the research you do and for also writing in your own experiences. I literally binged the Princes Diaries AU during work and lost a good half day to it, and I regret nothing because that fic left me in SHAMBLES. I secretly adore the way you say you're going to keep a fic short, and end up writing an insane amount of words for it. (I have not yet left my obligated long-ass comment on Chapter 4 of the College AU yet because I am still processing the fate/destiny concept.)
@tangledstarlight -> Gahh. Rosie. Please. This is going to sound a little repetitive considering I just screamed at you last night, but now I guess I will just have to publicly confess my adoration for you!!! Thank you for being my first online friend in a very long time, and for putting up with me yelling at you about everything (and also nothing at the same time). I can't believe all it took was one message about your Royals AU for you to post it, but I will gladly take that credit any day. You are so so so incredibly talented with your writing, and your ability to transport me to another world while I read your fics is unparalleled. I adore the way you can come up with a new story to write every day, and then proceed to throw it into your pot of other WIPs. I am so so so so lucky to have gotten to know you and am incredibly grateful that I now have someone to cry about everything with 🧡 (If you read anything from Rosie, you need to read her Seasons/Long Distance Juke "friendship" fic and the Reggie x Photography oneshot that made me bawl my eyes out.)
@thedeathdeelers -> No thoughts. Just soulmates. Jk jk, you know I love your Reggie x Ray x Carlos fics, and I will scream in the tags about it until the day I get more of those fics from you. This is lowkey a threat, but wrapped in kindness. You are so wonderful to see on my dash (albeit scary at times because of the sheer amount of headcanons and theories running through your head), but you radiate such positive energy that it's impossible to not want to jump in and scream about soulmates with you.
Some special mentions to fics that also live rent free in my head:
@sunsetsandcurves wrote a Willex Cruise Ship AU inspired by a Simple Plan song and it’s something I never knew I needed until I read it. 
@phantom-curve wrote a Juke fic based off of Coney Island and I would just like to say, yes, it did shatter me. (Here’s the fluff sequel that makes up for it though)
@unsaidjulie wrote the Juke dog fic of my dreams and I simply cannot express how much I want the Molina’s to have a dog now. 
@pawprinterfanfic managed to get me incredibly invested in a Star Wars AU even though I know absolutely nothing about Star Wars. I just know that I would die for two (2) space boys. 
@sanssssastark  your Later universe made me realize that I do very much want there to be more mature content for this fandom (and you constantly deliver).
@theobligatedklutz wrote a Tangled Willex AU that makes me screech every time there’s an update. Just read it.
@alexthedrummerboy your talent knows no bounds when it comes to your Social Media AU. Also she’s written ORIGINAL songs for Alex and Willie?!?!?! 
@gennified has this really wonderful modern take on pride and prejudice for Willex and I’m so obsessed with how much miscommunication there is.
@bananaleaves okay, I just found your Tumblr today, and I know you don’t know me in any capacity, but allow me to scream about THIS FIC RIGHT HERE. If anyone in this fandom is to read ANYTHING, it’s this fic. This was one of the best things I’ve read in a long time and absolutely wrecked me. Please just read this.
This turned out WAY longer than it was supposed to, and I’m SO SORRY. (I also tried to make sure I got everyone’s pronouns right, so PLEASE let me know if they’re wrong!) A final sincere thank you to everyone in this fandom who writes. Your talent knows no bounds. Gonna stop talking now before this becomes an essay....
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vod-ika · 4 years
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Clones; A Sociologic Rant
I’m pretty sure I could base a whole sociologic thesis off of this show I have so many thoughts this is LONG.
So the fascinating thing about clones is that over and over it’s emphasised in show that they are considered property/cannon fodder/disposable, and at the same time it’s shown that they understand that claim, and still go so far out of their way to control some kind of their own independence.
I occasionally have a hard time separating show and fanfiction (fuck canon it’s my world now) but even in show, the allusions to modern militaries, the decorating of armor, the personalisations such as accents, names, and specific groups (Domino Squad) all point to an entirely unmitigated, completely developed culture inside the Republic. So this is basically a list of things I’ve seen, wondered about, or headcanoned in TCW.
- I would just LOVE to sit down with Filoni or Lucas and a sociologist and just Talk about how, if this army was real, what all would the Kaminoan’s have programmed in their heads (mental stability, coping mechanisms, stamina, self-preservation instinct, etc,) and how would it work in real-time, on and off the battlefield. What kind of programming went on in those eight to ten developmental years that ensured that loyalty was innate, the knowledge of property was omnipresent, and that they believed they weren’t allowed to own anything? What did they do to them to make sure that they would never want to form an uprising???
- “We are only as good as our weakest link” is repeated in team events endlessly, something that can extend to both skill and health. How deeply engrained are checkups, both mental and physical? I want you to look me in the eye and tell me that day in and day out clones, regardless of rank, are able to listen to and watch brothers die and Not have that affect them.
- Were they programmed with “protect the Jedi” in mind, or was it just, “bam. here is your CO, they outrank you so you have to respect/protect them?”,  and then one of them jumped off a building with no armor and their captain had a heart attack? With the whole “Jedi were peacekeepers now they’re generals” thing I feel like the Senate just took two pieces of a puzzle that don’t actually go together but fit anyways and shoved them together and now they’re just kinda staring at each other like “the fuk u doin here”
- HEALTH. IS SO. IMPORTANT. When you know that any injury severe enough or illness overlooked long enough could result in you being swiftly and carelessly replaced by someone who looks Exactly like you, how much more of an emphasis is put on health, bodily wellbeing, and injury prevention? Clones are human, and while they’re very highly trained, strong humans, they’re still human and skin is skin. (Applying real logic to a cartoon) Seeing clones in things like explosions that they potentially survive, but lose a limb or two always made me sad because, to The Republic/The GAR/ Kamino, what good is a crippled clone? To Kaminoans, their life’s purpose is over and you might as well treat them as a lame horse. Fuck Kamino.
- I just realised something. When most modern soldiers deploy, they deploy with the intent to eventually be replaced because they have served their time wherever they are, and are being replaced by a new wave of soldiers. Clones deploy with the intent to die and be replaced until the battle is won.
- When Marines or Infantrymen or Sailors ship out, they always have duffel bags or those gigantic green laundry bag stuffed with clothes and personal items. Now, we know that clones collect personal items, and assumedly have multiple pairs of blacks (or no sweat glands) but I have yet to see any kind of carrying devices other than crates and small backpacks like for small Hutt babies or explosives. Do they have to leave everything behind when they’re op-hopping to their next planet? Are there barracks left behind that hold the ghosts of personal blankets and magazine clippings? Or is there a mountain of green laundry bags just off-camera?
- Naming culture, good god. So, you’re fresh out of boot, and you’ve got your number still. You’re like, “dope. I’m CT-1234. I’m a GAR mortarman. Go time.” Then, some dickhead is like, nah you’re called Sparkles now lets go prank Gogo and Jazz. Naming is WILD, and I’m mostly drawing from fanfiction for this. Either you’re named for some major or heroic or kickass reason like Tracer or Wolffe or Fireball, or you’re named for the most mundane thing like your number ends with 22, so you’re Twos or there are checkers on your armor so now you’re Check. either way it is a personal choice that Specifically defies the number they were assigned at decanting. Even Dogma had one for fucks sake.
- Painting armor. You know that time had to be taken to sit quietly and detail on that eel, or those lines, or that decal. Did it do anything to better the Republic? Did it win any battles or save any precious Jedi? No, but it happened anyways. People like to discuss why we play video games; there’s no societal, familial, or interpersonal benefit, only benefit to the one playing. There’s no societal, familial, or interpersonal benefit to painting armor, only benefit to the one painting. Fuck Kamino. 
- Vocal inflections! The places they’re deployed affecting their speech patterns! I personally have a wild mashup of regional American accents because of the time I’ve spent traipsing, so how does being deployed planet after planet affect clone speech patterns??? Who rolls their r’s and who doesn’t? Are there transfers from other battalions whose accents are indiscernible because of where they were last deployed? Or ones who just have a whole additional vocabulary of local language? I’m three states away and the Louisiana accent blows my mind. Imagine that, but a whole fucking star system away???
- LINGO. Military lingo, planetary lingo (see above), sign language etc. give me different forms of communication outside Basic, used in both the formal and informal settings. (name calling in ASL/BSL during a briefing, talking about shinies in front of their faces in a language they don’t yet understand, talking about Jedi in front of their faces in a language they don’t understand.) Clones are told all that they are is property but damn if that property isn’t going to be able to talk shit about you to your face.
- To add on... Mando’a???? Is it innate? Is it learned? Did Jango Fett personally sit every clone ever down and teach them how to say Cat and Dog and Yes and No? Does every clone know it, or only those who sought it out? Literally it’s the most impersonal personal thing. “You, a thing who was made for combat, who looks exactly like millions of others, know one language of BILLIONS in the galaxy, purely because the man whose hair we based your genetic makeup off of knows it.” like WHAT
- HELMETS. BEING. SO. VERY. PERSONAL. Everything you see, speak, hear, smell is filtered through that bucket on your head. Are HUDs customisable? Is wearing or touching someone else’s bucket a no-no? Who’s watching telenovelas on guard duty?
- Speaking OF helmets: When your waking hours are constantly covered by your bucket, how do bodily “tells” betray what your face can’t? People acclimate. How common is it to be able to read your brother’s emotions like a fucking book based purely on how squared his hip is in parade rest, or which shoulder is higher than the other at attention?
- Or even just armor. Dude, that is literally the only thing between their skin and certain death by laser bolt. You ever talked to an athlete? And how picky they are about what cleats they wear or what goggles they use, or what percentage Gatorade their water is? We’re incorrigible. Imagine that, but the choice made results in how mobile you are, or how much laser to the shoulder you can stand.
- Time is so fucking short and they all must know that. I think I’ve used the line, “the average lifespan of a clone is measured in months, not years,” and boy does that fucking hit. How do you handle life when you were made to be snuffed out by it?
To conclude, I have many thoughts about the minute details of a working army that is comprised of identical people created, raised, and sent off to die for a war they didn’t start. Sounds a little ridiculous when you say it out loud, but between the show itself, fanart, and fucking fanfiction, it’s a little hard not to attribute human nuances to the show that exemplified my childhood. I’m an adult and it is my very highly specifically adult choice to psychoanalyse this show, and you can bet I’ll throw hands with Disney at any time.
“When my creator cares not how I face death, only that it is for them, how do I use the time death allows me? Cruel is my maker to have given me eyes to see and ears to hear the world, but denied me the chance to explore it. I can only hope that those who follow see what I could not, and that eventually a painting of all the world will be born through the eyes of the many.”
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jcfoxington · 3 years
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@sambambucky​ : “pls... Pastels, Peaches and Pain??? among us first draft??? marvel meets warframe meets a bunch of tumblr posts (it’s not an au!?!??!)
hi jo !!! Pastels, Peaches, and Pain is one of those sambucky wips i have mostly fully fleshed out in my head because of one (1) extreme moment of clarity after a rogue ‘what if’ tangent thought but havent written anything of yet out of restraint / knowing i need to finish at least one of my current sambucky wips before i start it or none of them will get done
this was the rogue tangent thought: “what if Sam is haunted by Figaro’s ghost and has been since he was a kid?”. i’ve changed the ghost cat to not be Figaro but that’s the premise !
i refer to the fic as the cat fic ‘cause the whole plot is based around sam’s ghost cat companion insisting he adopts nat’s cat Liho after endgame and then Figaro later and then [insert redacted because plot spoilers but just know it relates to Alpine]. no im not projecting my feelings about cats idk what youre talking about 
here’s some note snippets just for you:
the cat, inexplicably, takes a liking to bucky, which is really annoying bc sam doesnt know how to explain to him that all the oddly soft gusts of wind are actually sam's dead cat insisting on getting pats
bucky getting shade thrown at him by said ghost cat during all of tfatws + them making up (and not out. yet)
starts when sam's a kid & follows him as he grows up w/ a ghost kitty as a companion only he can see & interact with + angst with an undertone of comedy + getting together
he whispers to ghost kitty, who simply mmrrs happily
for the among us first draft thing, what basically happened is i saw this tweet and this video and my brain latched onto these dynamics so hard i had to write about them. 
here’s a sketch of my two main imposters, Black (left) and Cyan (right):
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and here’s a snippet:
The thing having Cyan pause and stare out at the asteroid field is how the colors stretch to family. When they and Black came aboard, they had thought every crewmember was an adult working on the planet-change project. That the patch of off-white with a black something-pattern-or-shape signified status. In a way, Cyan supposes it does, but just not the way they expected. They had expected it to show what rank an individual held within the hierarchy of the crew, from deckhand to division leader to captain, not to show that you're family of the crew and not actually part of the crew itself. 
There are innocents on this ship. Children. It was not something any of them had anticipated, and not something Cyan had been prepared to deal with. They and Black boarded this horrible place to eradicate a threat, believing each and single one of the humans were accomplishes and dedicated to the goal of destroying Cyan and Black's species, and their planet. But, now?
marvel meets warframe meets a bunch of tumblr posts... doesn’t have a wip title or seperate document for itself yet cause it’s been stuck in my ‘story ideas’ document since its creation. so ‘marvel meets warframe meets a bunch of tumblr posts’ is literally just me describing the vibe of an original world gjkerfkds
the world came to be for two reasons. firstly, i want to do make take on a superhero universe because the plot and complete lack of communication in both the dcu and mcu piss me the fuck off. secondly, needed a place to dump ocs with elaborate backstories or fantasy / sci-fi abilities that dont fit into any of my existing worlds
which sounds super competent but trust me, it isn’t. it didn’t gain any solidity at all until i decided to do a personal ‘how different can i make spn castiel look & still retain the same vibe?’ challenge. i have my own cas now
however, the reason i said ‘marvel meets...’ is because i’ve snagged a couple of different things from the mcu, most notably: enemies to reluctant coworkers to lovers, yes our best friend have the same name. no they’re not the same person, secret evil org is controlling the government, and the assassin that tried to kill you several times is now your best friend
warframe was added to the world because i got attached to my Volt build, gave them a name, and have some headcanons idk what to do with because i refuse to interact with that fandom. also because the friend i made through discussing warframe lore + plot dicked me over so it feels Bad to create for
the glue to this whole mess is that one “in every friend group there’s a mean bisexual, an even meaner lesbian, a she/they, a he/they, a himbo, an astrology bitch, a short king, and a token straight” tumblr post. my main group of superheroes ala the avengers consist of these people. the token straight is the only one i havent figured out who is yet
ever since i figured that out ive been throwing story / character ideas and weirdly specific aesthetics from popular tumblr posts into this world’s notes. here’s some examples:
sword grandmas
that trope where someone’s really nice and acts super well-adjusted to society but then they do something super whack and dangerous and you realize ‘oh they’re secretly a little bit insane, actually’
anti-gay group’s leader’s wife leaves him for another woman
superhero who swore to be the best hero [city / planet / solar system / continent / ????] has ever seen ever since he lost his wife. not because she’s dead but divorce just sucks & the hero-to-be is terrible at coping
dishevelled swamp witch
that one person who runs around with an amulet all the time & isn’t aware it’s cursed
an exasperated, tired superhuman assassin running after their husband and their husband's best friend. their husband and said husband's best friend both have wings. chaos ensues (yes, this one is a sambucky post)
ask me about my WIPs!
BONUS:
@sambambucky​​ : #i want to have a coffee and listen to synopses of all of these.... #i miss the discord wow #WRITING TAG #waitttt time jumping dream movie? lmao I'VE READ THIS LIST FORTY TIMES and every time i rediscover something i wanna know about #outfit doodlesss ugh i need to go
couldnt not respond to your tags because they make me go ghrkjfnerknf but in the good way. we miss you too jo !!
the time jumping dream movie was one of the first vivid dreams i had and the whole thing was so stupidly coherent and whacky i had to write it down. it grew plot, a queer love dynamic, weird sci-fi apocalypse elements, anti-military propaganda, questionable science, and a sequel while i wasnt looking and now i just. have to make it a real movie or i’ll combust
outfit djoodlles.png is only on there because my best friend sent me a ‘draw this outfit’ meme and space kitty, my current character brainrot, stole all the outfits for himself. otherwise, that file just sits there until im feeling like designing an outfit or wanna see how a stupid thing looks on my oc patrick
here’s one of the two poses-to-doodle-outfits-on of space kitty ive made so far:
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and here’s one of those stupid things on patrick (that then turned into an actual outfit of his because i have no self control):
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rachelbethhines · 4 years
Text
Tangled Salt Marathon - You're Kidding Me
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So we’ve finally come to the last of season two’s filler episodes. Let’s see if we can knock this one out real quick. 
Summary: The front door of the mysterious seashell estate vanishes, trapping the group. They try to find another way out but find a spinning top whose magic regresses Cassandra and Lance into toddlers and Shorty into a baby.  They’ve only have an hour to find the top and reverse the effects or the changes become permanent. Unfortunately neither of Rapunzel’s or Eugene’s parenting methods keep their now childish friends on task. 
So Why Did No One Stand Watch Last Night?
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They were all sleeping right next to the entrance, and after the run in with the mirror monsters, you would think that they would have taken turns standing watch. 
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But nope, the front door vanishes when no one was looking cause they don't have any foresight. 
A Low Budget Doesn’t Excuse Filler
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Like most of season two, this is yet another episode that adds very little to the overall story. It’s slightly better than the Return of Quaid or Curses, but not by much. I put it on the same level as The Forest of No Return, as I do like the mains’ development, but there’s really no reason why such episodes exist to begin with. 
The meta reason for staying in certain places for three episodes, instead of only one or two, is because of budgetary reasons. The crew have to build new sets and models for every new location or person the cast comes across. This costs money to make, so the higher ups wanted to reuse assets. Which is understandable, but not an excuse for utilizing them poorly.  
If you need to stay in one area or have characters reappear, then you need to give story reasons for that. Ones that tie back to the overall narrative and/or the mains’ character arcs. 
The shell house and Matthews should be more important than what they are as they both have connections to the ultimate big bad of the series.Adria shouldn’t be wasted for a whole episode when she’s the only one driving the plot in season two and has limited appearances. Vardaros and its people shouldn’t be a one and done thing if you’re going to spend so much time setting them up. And there’s still one off episodes, locations, and characters who aren’t brought back and add nothing 
Not only does this make for a weaker story, it also undermines the cost saving measures that you tried to implement to begin with.  
This Isn’t Representation! 
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Get it?! 
She’s a top! 
She’s totally gay, but like not really, cause this can also be interpreted as a dominatrix joke, and there’s no other real indication of her orientation outside her like smiling at her best friend/crush/sister sometimes and keeping that rose her creepy ex-boyfriend gave her. 
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And don't give me any bullshit excuses about Disney not letting the crew make Cassandra canonly gay/bi. 
The Owl House aired just this year, the same year as Tangled’s final season. Also Globby and Carl from Big Hero Six were both confirmed to be a couple on screen a month after this episode came out. Both shows would have been in development at the same time as Tangled was. Both would have been subject to the same regulations and restrictions while writing their stories. 
It isn’t “Disney” that stopped the storyboard artists from having Cass be a confirmed lesbian, it’s Chris and Ben, the head writers themselves, who failed to write it into the story properly, if at all. 
Chris is the one who made Raps and Cass “sisters”. Chris is the one who wouldn’t tell the crew about his ‘twists’. Chris is the one who had Cass crush on Andrew, even after he tried to kill her. Chris is the one who made Cassandra ‘straight’ and has since used gay baiting to keep her fanbase in his pocket. 
Like I am really damn sick and tired of Casspunzel stans defending Chris on twitter, when he’s the very one who sunk thier ship to begin with. I’m also really fed up with certain fans trying to bully others for not accepting their “Cass is a lesbian” headcanons as fact because what the storyboarders say on twitter after the show is over with isn’t gospel and isn’t real rep. 
I don’t care if you ship Cass with Raps or headcanon her as being gay. Ships and headcanons are great and can be a lot of fun. But fuck you if you ever try to shame people for not sharing your ships/headcanons. Not only is it biophobic and acephobic to insist that there’s only ever a binary option when it comes to orientation and shipping, but it also reinforces harmful stereotypes and tropes about people in the queer community. 
Like, yes, I personally may be an introverted angry bitch who’s an LBGTQA member and activist, but that doesn’t mean that every introverted bitchy woman in media is a lesbian. What kind of message does that send people when that’s the only character archetype that’s given representation or is loudly proclaimed as ‘gay’ by the wider audience? Fuck that noise! 
I Know Humor is Subjective but...WHY?
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Why did we give the baby a beard? How does that logically work? Did anyone outside of the crew actually find this funny? 
TTS has like this one out of touch dude throwing out jokes that don’t really land with the target audience. Fans have called it ‘boomer humor’ but it’s actually ‘Gen-X’ humor. Not only because Chris and Ben are Gen Xers but because this is the type of crap my older brother would find hilarious. 
Gen Xers are between Boomers and Millennials and so their humor is this weird blend of gross out shock humor, ironic nihilism, and out of date stereotypes that are only mildly better than those of the previous generation before them. They’re the generation who gave us Beavis and Butthead, South Park, and Clerks. 
That’s not a criticism of Gen X as a generation, but rather just an acknowledgment that they’re worlds away from the neo-dada absurdism, more socially conscious, and globalized humor of Gen Z.    
So Why Is the Bad Guy Telling the Heroes How to Foil His Plans? 
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Like he not only tells them how to fix their problem and how long they got in order to do so, but he also informs them how it happened in the first place. This goes directly against his plans. Had he simply said nothing and stayed out sight, then Raps and Eugene would have been lost for the full hour and most likely not have saved everyone on time. 
I like to headcanon that Mathews is just “that asshole” that loves to taunt and tease but in a that manner that gives him plausible deniability. He also may just be bored, since he’s a ghost trapped in one place all the time. Yet that still doesn’t change the fact that he shot himself in the foot here. 
Raps and Young Cass’s Relationship Is the Same as Raps and Adult Cass’s, and That Is a Problem. 
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Condescending, manipulative, hypocritical, and bossy is the way Rapunzel treats everyone. She doesn’t understand the actual difference between a child and an adult. She only understands who she who she can and can’t boss  around. And those people that she can’t place under her thumb are labeled antagonists by the show. 
Nor does she actually care about what either kid Lance or kid Cass has to say. She’s just being proformative, and young Cass can see through that BS, which why her methods do not work. It’s not because she’s not ‘strict’ enough; it’s because she’s not being honest. 
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Meanwhile Child Cassandra is just as combative, rude, bullying, and entitled as Adult Cassandra. In season three she regresses even further and becomes more violent than before.
Unlike Rapunzel, Cassandra wasn’t trapped in a tower for 18 years with zero human contact outside of her abuser. She escaped that fate and was raised in a loving home. That doesn’t mean that there won't be scars, but I still expect her to be more mature than her seven year old self. Just because she’s whining about not being special enough at 24 instead of screaming about the floor being lava doesn’t mean that she’s still not throwing a temper tantrum.  
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Like I should not be seeing a replay/foreshadowing of their main conflict here. They aren’t children. They’re dynamic isn’t that of a mother and child. It’s not even a big sister looking out for a little sister type relationship. Its two immature women dragging innocent victims into their bitchy cat fight for dominance over the other.  
If you want me to take their issues seriously then give them real stakes to disagree over, mature behavior that I can root for, and a resolvement that doesn’t reverse any potential development that they could have had.    
Matthews Plan Makes Zero Sense
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For starters, half the group being kids isn’t enough of a reason for Rapunzel to stay at the shell house. Even if the effects of the time top became permanent, then Raps and Eugene could just leave and take the kids with them. Either to finish the road trip, or go straight back to Corona. Not that there’s any real reason to get the Dark Kingdom anyways, nor is there a ticking clock stopping Raps from trying again later if she chose to. 
Rapunzel also is not obligated to become anyone’s mother. If she took them back to Corona than Cap would undoubtedly raise Cassandra all over again, and Lance and Shorty could be adopted by someone else. Any of the pub thugs might take them or even perhaps the King and Queen since they missed out on raising their actual daughter. Though for my money I’d get Monty or Xavier to take them in. They seem the most mature and both are shown to be good with kids. 
Then again Rapunzel has been shown twice now to not give a damn about abandoning orphans, so even the ‘dump them at an orphanage’ or ‘leave them alone in the woods to fend for themselves’ isn’t entirely off the table either. I wish I was joking, but I’m not. Sadly, only Eugene’s love for Lance might be the one thing to stop her from doing just so, and even that’s iffy. 
As for the missing door from earlier, if that was all that was stopping them from leaving then the time top shenanigans were fully unnecessary altogether. 
I Actually Like Eugene and Rapunzel’s Conflict Here; I Just Wish It Was In a Better Episode. 
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Each of their viewpoints stem from their upbringing. 
Rapunzel is unique in that she was simultaneously emotionally abused and neglected while being physically spoiled. Especially once she found out that she was princess, where she was then handed nearly anything and everything she wanted. She doesn’t recognize that getting your every possible whim come true can be damaging. Nor does she have any comprehension of what living in poverty is like and how this many toys is wasteful to someone like Eugene who had so very little and stole to survive. 
She does however associate limits, boundaries, and orders with abusive behavior because she’s been denied autonomy and respect her whole life. She’s never seen what healthy parenting looks like and how rules can be applied correctly.     
To Rapunzel no orders is ‘freeing’ and ‘validation’ is all that is needed to get a child to listen to you. Which doesn’t work for her because she doesn’t understand that real communication is more than just giving a compliment now and then. 
Meanwhile Eugene lacked any sort of anchor at all. He was left to his own devices at a young age and had no one to rely on for emotional needs and, after leaving the orphanage, no one to provide physical needs either. 
It’s telling that he and Lance latched onto Quaid as the only authority figure in their life, despite Quaid never out right adopting them. He was the only sense of stability that they had who they could trust wouldn’t hurt them, despite being strict with them. 
And now that Eugene has gotten older and is reformed, he can probably understand why Quaid was so harsh on him and Lance. Quaid probably did more to try and help them turn from a life crime than even Rapunzel did. Like meeting Rapunzel was the inciting incident that inspired Eugene to make that leap, but the groundwork was already laid out for him to do so elsewhere. Things like his good communication skills, respect and empathy of others, and understanding of boundaries had to be learned from somewhere, and if not from the Sheriff of Vardaros than who? 
What I’m getting at is that, while Rapunzel rejects her parents methods but then fails to break her learned habits from them anyways, Eugene is the reverse. He’s come to embrace his mentor’s teachings, but he fails to implement them correctly because he’s not Quaid. Being authoritative isn’t his strong suit. It goes against his usual nature as the easy going person that he is and so any attempts to come across as forceful fail as they’re hollow. 
Kids know authenticity and genuineness when they see it. The children reject Rapunzel because she’s not being real with them, yet they also reject Eugene cause he’s not being honest with himself. 
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It’s a complex and mature conflict. Neither person is fully right nor wrong, and only by learning from each other and adopting both methods can they achieve their goal. 
TTS can be deep when it wants to be. There’s a good foundation here for mature themes and complex characterization. It’s just the series doesn’t ever commit to it. 
Whatever personal drama going on here about two young adults trying to cope with their past traumas and how that affects their current life and future goals is completely lost in the magical goofy antics and low stakes situation. Even the stuff about Eugene and his relationship with Quaid is reduced to nothing but a one off joke rather than being genuinely explored as a point of development.  
Imagine how much more powerful things would have been if Angry and Red were brought along on the trip. If this argument was over them and whether or not they should adopt the two girls themselves or consider other options. That would be something with real weight. Something with a choice that had actual consequences attached to it. Something that would permanently affect all involved parties. Something that wouldn’t make the two leads look like outright dicks for abandoning two children for a second damn time in a row.    
You Have 70 Feet of Magical, Indestructible Hair! Why Are You Afraid of a Bunch of Dogs!?
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You’ve fought off giant monsters, killer robots, and supernatural beings with magical powers. What do you mean you can’t hold off a pack of guard dogs while busting down a stuck door? Why is Eugene the shield for everyone and not the actual unbreakable hair that you use as a shield all the damn time? And Why did we have to rely on Shorty again to be the deus ex machina of the episode? 
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At this point the writers should have just made him Demantius instead of the monkey.   
What Happened To This New Dream? Where Did It Go In Season Three?
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Most fans who do enjoy season two happen to be big New Dream fans as this is by far and away the best season for them. I’ll admit that the series, up to this point, had me actively liking them together, despite being originally lukewarm to the pairing in the movie. 
Their conflicts were for the the most part mature and real. They learned from one another equally and had open communication when it didn't involve ‘marriage is a trap’ BS. Things, like compromising on differentiating future goals, honesty and communication, and making time for one another and extending effort into a relationship while being true to yourself are all relatable issues. 
Even today's episode featured the topic of having kids and parenting. Which is a discussion you absolutely need to have with your prospective spouse before entering into any long term commitments and signing any legal contracts. For real, I’ve seen marriages fall apart because they didn’t agree on whether or not they wanted children. 
I don’t know what went down between writing season two and season three, but things quickly took a sharp turn away from this dynamic and nosedived into a pit of uncomfortable bullying and gross sexist implications here after. 
Matthews Plan Goes Against Zhan Tiri’s Plan 
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Yeah so Matthews is one of Zhan Tiri’s disciples, but he apparently doesn’t know of her goals/plans, cause she needs Rapunzel and company to reach the moonstone, not stay stuck here. 
The meta reason for this that the Zhan Tiri’s story was altered at the last minute and the writers failed to make sure there was any sort of consistency between what they already set up and where they actually wound to actually taking the plot.  
The in universe reason is that Zhan Tiri is an impotent moron, but that’s not what the writers were going for so it’s a fail. 
Conclusion  
I like the New Dream stuff, and Matthews is at least entertaining despite being incompetent. Everything else about the episode is ‘meh’ tho. 
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ladylynse · 3 years
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Hi, I've been reading a lot of your Secret Quartet stuff, and I really like this crossover. Onto my question, whatdo you see the four (Danny, Jake, Randy, Adrien) doing with their lives in the future? Like, do they get married, get a dream job, have kids? Stuff like that.
Thank you! I’m glad you like my work, and I appreciate you letting me know!
As for the futures of these four, I’m happy to play with various possibilities, so I don’t stick hard and fast to any particular headcanons. I know I’ve written at least one potential future for Danny (in Snapshots) that I hope he wouldn’t see. Come to think of it, Adrien’s futures in my fics have been more bittersweet than anything else.
Adrien - I think he’d be married with kids. Either the love square would sort itself out or he and Kagami would collectively manage to get away from the parental expectations--though in the latter case, at least one of them would probably get cut off from their family, since their parents strike me as those sorts of people, but they’d be happy with less if that were the case. Whoever he ends up with, he’d be happy just to be with them. I think he’d be a good dad, which is impressive considering his role model. I don’t think his first job would be something he wants to do--I think it would be something he does to please his father--but later on in life, I think he’d find something that makes him happy. If he’s with Marinette, they’ll have their hamster. And probably a ca,. an unchipped stray they find and adopt or one rescued from a shelter, because Adrien is a pushover. And then they’d have to get another hamster after the cat eats the first one, scarring the kids and Adrien.
Danny - I don’t think Danny would manage his dream as an astronaut, at least not one who makes it into space, unless he worked something out in short order with the ghosts to rescue his chance at that career path. I think he’d float around at jobs for a bit, trying to find his place in life because he’d never thought about a career path that wasn’t astronaut, and maybe work for his parents for a bit while taking a general year or three at the nearest community college. He’d talk to the ghosts while trying to figure out what he wants and gets conflicting advice, but Clockwork would refuse to let him check out possible futures to help him narrow down his choices. I think he would settle down with someone who knows or learns his secret (ie pick your ship), but I don’t think he’d want kids right away--both so he could enjoy some time with the person he married and because he’s not sure how safe it would be if he did have kids. For the kids. Because of the ghosts. Even if he’s worked something out with the regular ones, every once in a while, he has to deal with someone new, and he’s not sure it’s worth the risk. They might decide to adopt a slightly older child or two (Danny was never sure if he could have kids anyway). 
Randy - I’m not entirely convinced Theresa would be able to pin him down. If she did, I don’t think they’d have kids. Randy always struck me as a fun uncle sort of person. I could see him working somewhere for the money off the start and then gleefully quitting in favour of something he enjoys much more. Maybe he’d travel as much as he could, doing a bit of photography on the side because hey, now that he’s learned about it, it’s actually kinda cool--though he doesn’t have the patience to wait for a perfect shot, just an eye for spotting it that developed from all those years perching on buildings and streetlamps and otherwise looking around at the world from a different view than most. I think he’d live for spontaneity and surprises and find unique little treasures to give to the people he cares about (platonic and romantic if we go romantic). I imagine that he’d be the sort of person who would work really hard to get his flight license (and all the associated hours) once he put his mind to it (though I pick that because I could see him having a more restless nature and wanting to have access to a plane to go flying), and I could see him turning something like that into his own business, offering tours and whatnot. He might not remember his time as the Ninja if the others aren’t able to find a way to do that/extend his run past high school, but I think he’d still carry some of the lessons he learned with him. 
Jake - Once he and Rose find each other, they make it work, even though their relationship is very long distance off the start. Jake’s responsibilities would grow, so his ‘job’ would be more of a farce than anything else, because it would be rooted in the magical world. He might try to cover it by being a travel writer or something like that, going all across the country to find these niche spots and writing about them. If Rose worked in environmental protection, his work could complement hers, and the two of them would be able to make cases for conversation--both for the human world and the magical one. Jake would have enough memories of Haley as a baby to have an idea of what having kids would be getting them into, but I’m not sure if Rose would want them--at least not right away. Her head’s a mishmash of memories from two different timelines now, and the nice moments of family time together are thrust into sharp contrast of her wiping the floor with another initiate over a petty dispute, and she’s not convinced she’d be a good mother. I think Jake would reassure her but not push her. Haley would have announced her intention to have kids, so he wouldn’t feel as pressured to ‘continue the family line’ or whatnot. 
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steve0discusses · 4 years
Text
Yugioh S4 Ep 23: Roland Freaks Out for 25 Straight Minutes
Oh man, took a break from the blog for a bit there because I gave myself a project to do that is 160ish color panels to draw by June 30th and um...it takes a while to do that, it turns out. Every time I’m like “wow I actually have enough time to make a buffer for the blog” I get so distracted.
But anyways, I started having some issues with my wacom tablet, my mouse is a nightmare, and so...I’m just gonna look the other way and write a recap and unplug all of the wacom stuff and just stay the hell away from whatever happened to that...tablet.
maybe It’ll be fine tomorrow?
*sweats nervously*
Thank God I didn’t buy a cintique, that’s all I’ll say. 
Anyway, lets go back to Yugioh. Where were we?
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That’s right. Mokuba is checking in with my favorite Kaiba, Roland, who is currently just trying to keep the company running while the official Kaibas are flying to California.
And I’ll be honest, as I was typing this I thought “and why are they going to California again?” and it took me like...10 minutes to remember that Seto dropped absolutely everything and jumped on this massive plane in order to beat Rafael at cards to win the title “King of Games” which...Yugi had already lost to Rebecca about 2 years ago prior, but don’t tell that to Seto. Or Rebecca.
Also don’t tell Seto that the “King of Games” title originally comes from being possessed by a very emo ghost that has a tendency to set people on fire with Russian whiskey and has nothing to do with whatever shenanigans went down with Pegasus.
Honestly, I like to think that in the modern version of this show, Pegasus threw the “King of Games” line out there as like a corny joke, and when the teenagers started latching onto it like it was real, he was like “Oh what?” and left it alone because he just got his left eye ripped out of his face and was very distracted by the large amount of cultists in his basement that he suddenly needed to let go.
But youknow it’s the end of the world, Kaiba’s company is being bought out by a competitor, one of Dartz’ assassins are trying to kill both him and his brother, but he has to go to California immediately to play Rafael while he has the chance. Not sure how Alister got the tip-off that Kaiba would be flying back to California so quickly, but knowing the Kaibas, they probably jump on a plane several times a week.
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I’m just still baffled that Mokuba’s doing this over a cell phone. That he was like “I better call someone.” and instead of calling the Airline or the Coastguard he’s like “I’ll call Roland💗”
I’m pretty sure Roland saw that phone ringing with Mokuba in the callerID and was like “NO NO NO NO NO”
(read more under the cut)
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Luckily for Roland, everyone at Kaiba corp has to learn how to fly planes in order to pass the entry exam.
For reals though, that plane just casually bumped off a mountain like it’s in Diddy Kong Racing.
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There’s a lot of levels of brother’s saving brothers in this episode. You have Seto who thinks he’s saving Mokuba, but in fact it is Mokuba saving Seto by keeping this plane afloat. And then in reality, you can take another brother step backward and say it was Roland who was saving Mokuba who was saving Seto by giving the phone to that rando, and take even another step backward and say it was this Random Guy who was saving Roland who was saving Mokuba who was saving Seto.
So in reality, no brothers were really able to save eachother, it was actually that one secretary at the desk who screamed “JUST PULL THE LEVER HARDER, I DUNNO” until it worked.
But just remember that the theme of this episode is brothers saving brothers, although Mokuba is too small to really fly this plane, and Seto is too crazy to stop this duel and Roland is not really the secret inept heir of the Kaiba bloodline, and only in my little headcanon.
And also, I just have no idea who that random secretary is.
Anyways, Alister made this thing happen on the field.
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Hey guys?
How many guns do you need on a tank?
Like I...
That is a hilarious amount of guns on this tank.
Like every character designer part of me is dying right now. It’s when you’re learning Maya, and you finally figure out the duplicate tool, and you just--you just strap a billion guns on a spaceship. We’ve all done this.
But like...this gunship has a face, and that face has it’s own tiny Oricalchos.
All I’m saying is that Alister is having a hell of a time in his Maya 101 class he takes at the local community college when he’s not busy working for Kaiba Corp Airlines or busy killing people for Dartz. I want to know what grade he got on this project, because in my Maya classes the only people who were this dedicated were building weird ass warships for their games or building intense 3D My Little Pony fanfic.
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Here’s a list I can think of from the top of my head of challenges Seto Kaiba either quit or completely failed outright (basically the times Seto has NOPEd out or been forcibly kicked out):
-Joey Wheeler’s many challenges and also Spanish Class (as mentioned above)
-Beating Yugi in a card game
-Not joining Pegasus’ tourney initially so he could go on a vacation.
-We’ll just assume he’s only taken like a bunch of random college classes but only got an honorary degree
-Chess (like he was a Grand Master at one point but wtv, cards exist now)
-Didn’t arrest the Big Five or remove them from his mmo so they freakin died in there.
-Being the actual owner of the Millennium Rod
-Every time Yami tells him that they should be friends
-That whole story line where he was dating a dragon in a past life
-fulfilling that prophecy of killing Yami in the present timeline to end the world
-attempting to blow up his own battle city tournament before it was over because he didn’t win
-Getting all 3 Godcards
-When a possessed Tristan appeared over a mountain top to duel everyone and Seto just went “I’m out” and simply walked away
-Flying a blimp from point A to point B without it setting on fire
-Getting his Dad to build an amusement park
-Just anything to do with Noah
-the existence of magic in general
-every attempt he’s had to rebrand Kaiba Corp as “funtime games inc I swear we don't make tanks anymore, stop looking at all the tanks”
-Seto Kaiba’s entire Destiny storyline this season that he has gone way out of his way to get away from.
And like I’m sure there’s more, but I feel like half of Kaiba’s MO is that he is either Too Good To Bother With This or he has Lost Everything Very Dramatically. Mokuba at least has the right idea, by being one of the few people who has beaten Yugi Muto by peacing out halfway through the duel and stealing all Yugi’s stuff off of Yugi’s side of the table.
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Anyway, despite it being like...5 seconds since we saw Roland in a weird cyber room in what I assume was Japan, we now see him with his head pressed against the glass of this helicopter being like “BOYS NO NOT AGAIN WHY”
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And youknow, Roland was just trying to do the right thing, but he accidentally made things a million times worse by just showing up.
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And so Alister was like “well I better crash the plane now with this gust of green energy that destroys all mechanical equipment.”
Really not sure how Alister was planning to leave this plane after this duel was over. I don’t know if he thinks that far ahead.
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this isn’t even a joke I made up, Roland really did run up to the pilot and was like “Just throw down some ladders! That should work!” and it’s like...Do you not see the giant ship covered in a thousand guns right now, Roland?
And then Alister and Seto decide to have a fight about ethics where they’re both pretty wrong.
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I mean it’s not the exact line but yes this is basically what Seto said, point blank, and I was like “well...at least he owns it.”
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So cards happen, dragons get played (so MANY dragons) and because we had to end this arc, Alister loses the duel as we kind of knew he would.
And then Mokuba, because he knows no other life, sees an asshole older brother in pain and just wants to adopt him.
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Enjoy that trauma tossed onto your already megalith sized trauma pile, Mokuba.
Elsewhere, the legendary dragons have started syncing again, which is a weird thing that they can do that none of these guys have any control of.
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Mostly it just irritates whoever is holding these cards at the time.
But behold! the glory!
The glory of three tubby dragons wielding a plane!
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It’s what Kaiba always wanted but he had absolutely no idea he was doing it. Will anyone tell him that he managed to summon three dragons to fly him around the sky like a mamma bird? No. No one bothers to tell him that his wildest dreams just came true.
FYI There were other stills of more of the dragons and the plane, but I kept pausing on instances where it kinda looked like they were humping the plane so I gave up.
But, at least we all get to meet up, around the smoke coming out the back of this giant plane that now...will just sit here...until someone sues KaibaCorp over it, I guess.
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Like a soccermom, now Roland gets to give the whole frenemy crew a ride with...copters or whatever.
I dont’ know how Roland got here, y’all.
This happens a lot with animated shows, youknow, there’s a lot of plot threads, a lot of scenes and episodes that get freelanced out and outsourced, and people who make these shows aren’t working on the whole thing at once, they’re just going off of director notes--so there’s a good chance they had no idea that Roland...just shouldn’t be here.
But it’s OK, I enjoy whenever Roland is panicking in the background. He’s good set dressing.
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Seto does not give any more explanation of this corpse.
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And then, sprinting as fast as he could out of his copter comes Roland, who does what Roland does best. It’s this moment where you would usually see a parental figure reveal how much they care and adore their little children. But because it’s Roland, and these are the Kaibas, he instead takes this moment to reveal exactly how inept he is at the very last second.
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Never change, Roland. I love this massive green haired disappointment.
Anyway, I’m not sure when I’ll get the next update out, since I’ll be knee deep in drawing art I don’t need to draw, but just know I’m not dead. Usually I post fanart or whatever, but all I have is this Dartz I started drawing but he just has so much hair that I don’t think that one will ever get even remotely finished.
But anyway, if you just got here, this is a link to read these from the start.
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vivifrage · 4 years
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LORE, YOU SAY?? Give us them sweet lore headcanons. Not sure if you were seeking a specific prompting but I'm all eyes for your interpretation of the Pale King
PK does have most of my actually wordable headcanons at the moment so PK you shall get! Some may be familiar but I hope I’ve stashed a few deep enough for them to be fresh.
(And many thanks for the ask!)
(Note that my wyrm society stuff gets into some toxic masculinity Fun Times, so expect all the nonsense with that. Sixth bullet point in particular involves implied rape and racial/species supremacy. Not anything PK’s doing, though. There’s also some talk about death and some general body horror.)
Mkay so:
I’ve brought up a couple times in Broken Open my headcanons on wyrm society. I studied society for years I gotta put that somewhere y’know? So like, there’s a huge gender divide, where the males think they’re the actually civilized ones and they say the females are just fuckin’ feral. Intelligent, but feral.
So the males keep kidnapping their sons. PK’s father up and died before he could pull this off, leaving him to be raised - in part - by his mother.
Mama Wyrm, knowing someone was going to come after her baby boy, told him as many stories and did her damndest to introduce him to as many other females as she could without getting him eaten. The few around her were generally amazed by the fact she still had a son. Jealous AF, but still.
All in all, someone finally realizes PK might exist. And they go, and even though this lil wyrm boy thinks he knows better, he’s still charmed by this promise of being out from under his mom’s wing and gets far enough away from the nest that the older male grabs him and drags him the rest of the way away.
He proceeds to bounce between foster fathers. Most of them are older, so not spry enough to be chasing him out of their territory immediately, but he tends to get on their nerves eventually. Home kind of doesn’t exist, so he spends a lot of time in the communal spaces with the reincarnated males. Their preferred pastime is ego tripping.
Their other preferred pastime is talking down about literally everyone who isn’t a male wyrm. They’re fuckin’ awful about “bloodline purity” crap in regards to mortals and other Higher Beings. (The only thing worse than the reincarnated males who brag about never breeding with another species? The ones who whisper-brag behind their backs about doing that exact thing.)
They think they’re teaching PK how to be a proper, tough young male. PK never quite falls for it; he’s always an outsider looking in and going “What the fuck?”
Somewhat older PK!
Hallownest was part of his mom’s territory, before it came into his possession.
He did tend to terrorize other towns and kingdoms. Usually just experimenting with different approaches to see what changed, and how long a civilization’s memory was. Sometimes he didn’t even intend to spook people, he’s just a big fuckoff wyrm. Sometimes a town was his dinner, though.
He partially decided to stick with Hallownest because he’d not messed with them before.
The Radiance was the ruling god there when he realized he was dying and decided to dig in and reincarnate. She didn’t care. She didn’t realize Wyrms didn’t do perma-death like that.
He didn’t die of anything fun, it was just old age catching up to him.
He gave himself a bunch of arms and legs and wings because he’d not had any and he overcompensated a bit.
He didn’t mind dying, really. It was exceedingly uncomfortable, and a weird sensation, forming his own egg in his throat (which started choking off the rest of him, and for extra icky bonus points his guts and stuff started to dissolve and got used in the reformation process). However, he’d lived a lonely life, generally separate from the other males and refusing to go chase after the females.
He’d known that he wouldn’t be able to help any child of his. Either someone would get to his son or his daughter would be stuck in the same cycle of loss. Big part of why he refused to have kids even after rebirth.
Anywho, Radi was Not expecting him to come back. She was a little (a lot) mad about this.
Aaand PK as we know him:
The White Palace is in the Ancient Basin because a) he found the Abyss nearby and wanted to keep an eye on that, and b) there was nobody else there and he is very much a solitary being.
Except when he’s not solitary. He totally fell head over heels in love with the White Lady; when they married, he very literally gave her access to his soul via the Kingsoul. She, in the meantime, used her roots and such to help build the White Palace.
He struggles with expressing his emotions, especially around others, but when it’s just him and WL he’s very open. And also very, very romantic.
He loves to sleep on top of her. He’ll just curl up on her chest and snooze. Also gives him a chance to crawl up and wake her with early-morning kisses.
She’s like, the one person he’ll tolerate touching his wings, and that’s only sometimes. Sometimes he regrets giving himself so many because he hates when anything touches them.
He’s hard to get into courts and the like. He would much rather be left with reports and one-on-one meetings. He gets crabby around too many people and tends to up his glowing because meetings end quicker when everyone has eyestrain and a headache.
Hornet, however, is the one person he’ll turn it down for. Seeing as she was born and raised early on in Deepnest, her eyes were set up for the dark. She comes to the White Palace with Herrah as a wee baby and screams. Even once she’s older and long adjusted to the lighting, he dims himself way down if he knows she’s there.
Speaking of Hornet (and Hollow and Ghost and all the rest), he would be a somewhat better parent if he wasn’t under such bad conditions when he was siring kids. Particularly if he had to be involved from an earlier age. He still has awful coping mechanisms and would need someone around to check that his worst methods and traits don’t get blindly passed down, but he’d be more attentive and openly affectionate.
Part of this is because with Hornet especially, he just got blindsided by broodiness. He was a dangerous opponent if actually forced to fight already. If someone had dared put Hornet in danger, or Hollow before they were big and strong? He’d go straight-up feral. (I’ve got a “what-if” fic where Xero goes after PK when he’s on an outing with Hornet. She gets hurt and the next thing he remembers is standing over Xero’s corpse, having turned into a claws-and-teeth-and-spell-swords whirlwind and bitten his throat out.)
He keeps trying to curl up around his babies because that’s what mom wyrms do. Some of his early memories are being in the nest (which is basically a pit dug in a relatively small den and filled with moss and such) and snuggling up against his mother while she curled around it. He’s too short to pull this off effectively.
Nobody wanted to go in his workshop. It creeped them all out. He was perfectly happy about this.
Bitch loves baths. He’ll run himself ragged in terms of food, sleep, etc. but nothing stands between him and a nice, warm bath. Unlike most bugs he tends to bathe alone. He’ll take forever. He does hate having to clean his wings, though.
Despite them not really moving, when Hollow was but a wee tot and he was trying to teach them how to take a bath on their own, he still managed to get soaking wet every time. This confounds him.
Hornet has bitten him at least once. Possibly injected venom.
Admittedly I could post plenty more, probs. Especially involving him and his kids. But this has gotten
uh
long.
I hope they are interesting! Always happy to talk more about any of these or the way too many others.
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golgoterror · 4 years
Text
Alright, this is ungodly long, but I just wanted to talk about something regarding Jake. 
A lot of this fandom -- at least, from what I’ve seen -- label Jake as stupid. Some may even say Jake and smart are antonyms. This could not be further from the truth. It almost irritates me how much the fandom places this mischaracterization on him. Also, I get to talk about The Lad™ for about ten pages worth of words on Google docs, which is always very, very fun for me.
Well, first things first, let’s talk about the child genius and multi-billionaire polymath that is Jake English.
Puzzle Modus.
Let’s begin with something small. Jake’s modus is of puzzlekind! This is described as:
It's quite a handy modus, allowing you to captchalogue objects of any size, as long as you can fit them all in a finite space by maneuvering the cards around like a big game of Tetris. You like it because it keeps you sharp for solving any puzzles you might find when you go out raiding hallowed tombs, which is never. (x)
He likes puzzles! This is a huge headcanon I absolutely adore that has a basis in the comic: He’s a puzzles guy! This is just sort of a neat little fact about him that I adore to the moon and back. Just the idea of Jake fiddling about with a Rubik’s Cube is kind of adorable.
This is how he goes about doing everything every day of his life. I think that’s just amazing! And incredibly smart of him, I might add.
Skaianet. 
Jake is shown in the credits to take over Skaianet after the game ended. For those unfamiliar, Skaianet made many things for the game, including but not limited to: the interstellar travel we see, transportalizers, the lab by Rose’s house, all Jake’s fancy-schmancy computers, and Sburb itself. In the beta timeline, Grandpa Harley founded Skaianet. In the alpha timeline, Grandma English did. I know Jake didn’t start it up and trying to pass off his alt-timeline self as him is a bit far-fetched at best, but he had the spoons to take it over. I think that speaks volumes for Jake’s intelligence -- this implies, at the very least, he can understand mathematics and physics at a high level. Remind you of someone we already know?
It is also important to note that Jake does, in fact, build the company back from the ground up, because it went to shit before his grandmother died:
GT: Pretty sure her company made a tidy fortune til it went belly up. At least i still have a few of her knickknacks for keepsakes. (x)
So he built an interstellar company back up -- using what his intelligent grandmother had once used -- to being very useful and practical once again. 
As someone with a degree in mathematics and about to finish a degree in physics, I can say this sort of work would for sure require at the very least a decent understanding of quantum mechanics, statistical mechanics, electrodynamics, calculus (vector and differential forms), ordinary and partial differential equations, and perhaps other things like topology. I don’t know about you -- and I’m probably tooting my own horn a bit by saying this -- but I think that’s pretty nifty, if I do say so myself. 
Actor.
Once again, I’m reaching into the credits to show that Jake has become a movie star after the game ends. Memorizing all those lines, slipping into characters... Being an actor is no easy feat. 
( Side note: This leads into my headcanon that Jake can imitate accents and voices on a whim. No more arguing about whether he has a British, American, or Australian accent -- you’re all right! )
And I would like to add he has two jobs! Skaianet and being a movie star! This guy’s a fucking polymath for Christ’s sake.
Reading People.
Let’s start of simple: Brain Ghost Dirk. I can hear the outcries now of Dirk’s powers being the cause for this. And, yes, I can’t ignore Dirk’s influence in this, but Jake’s hope powers were also needed for the projection to come alive. And the fact he was able to make such a startlingly accurate projecting of Dirk in his own mind is astounding -- even BGD himself thinks so!
TT: You could view me as a projection of the real Dirk within your mind, as expressed through all of your thought patterns about him. TT: So I'm kind of a splinter of his corporeal self who happens to live in your awareness. TT: I'm a startlingly close approximation to the real thing, for all intents and purposes. GT: Just how startlingly close are we talking? TT: I'm not going to give you a bogus percentage like the glasses cause that's not my shtick. TT: But pretty damn close. (x)
A very deep understanding of the other is needed for Jake to do this. That is pretty fucking incredible. He can clearly read people really well -- he had a few times where he was cluing in on Jane and Dirk have feelings for him:
TG: its one of those things jane likes about u so much GT: It is? TG: which TG: errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr im not supposed to talk about 2 u evr so nm GT: Talk about what? TG: nope GT: You mean how um... GT: Well a way in which i suppose... TG: no nope GT: Jane is prone to looking upon me with what i fathom to be more than just friendly affection? (x)
TT: I guess call it an extra birthday present. But instead of a present that's awesome, consider it more like a weird confession that may change the way you feel about me. GT: Whoa uh... GT: Dirk are you... uh... GT: Saying what i think? (x)
He’s not completely clueless on people! In fact, he seems to have a really good understanding of his friends. That’s something a lot of people seem to forget because of the incident that I will be getting to later on.
Fending For Himself.
I’ve already written quite a bit on this, but I’ll sum it up here: Jake is exceptionally good at living in the wild and taking care of himself. Sort of like a wild garden; he doesn’t need to be taken care of. Survival skills, especially around fighting and fending off things, aren’t something everyone has. This, once again, counts in his favour, even if it doesn’t line-up with “book smarts”.
— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
That’s five things! It’s clear Jake is, in fact, a polymath and incredibly intelligent. So, what’s with the fandom painting him as being dumb? What’s with people actually thinking he’s stupid? I think we can all take several wild guesses as to why that’s the case.
— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
Takes things literally.
This is something that plagues Jake quite a lot. Case in point:
GT: Wow like the epic kevin costner film? TT: Almost exactly. Especially by the same degree of shittiness. GT: Oh man does that mean you have to drink your own pee?????? TT: You get used to the taste. Welcome it, even. TT: That takes about 15 days in a row of hard piss drinking though. GT: Ewwwwwwwwwwww no dude. No ew. :( TT: Relax, I don't drink any goddamn piss, ok? GT: Oh ok. Whew. (x)
But, well, let’s address the elephant in the room. The chat I laughed so hard at when I read it the first time due to pure, unadulterated second-hand embarrassment: Jake asking Jane if she had feelings for him.
Let’s analyze this, shall we? Jake starts off by being vague as all Hell, and I’ll spare those details, until finally...
GT: Just come out and say it. Do you fancy me? GG: No! GT: I see. GT: Very well then. GT: Jeez i mustve really misread that one! I feel like kind of a bone head now. (x / x)
Okay, she says no, and he backs off. That’s fine and dand--
GG: No!!!!!! GG: Oh my God, what am I saying here? GG: Jake, I didn't mean it! I didn't want to make you feel that way! GT: Now jane lets not backpedal here. GT: Youve spoken the truth and i greatly appreciate and respect you for that. GT: But now that i think about it you know what? GG: ... GG: No? :( GT: Please dont take this the wrong way but your answer is actually kind of a relief! (x)
... Oh, right. Yeah. It keeps going. It just keeps--
GT: Actually since youve made your feelings apparent and only see me as a friend that makes it a lot easier! GG: Haha, yes! GG: Friends!!!! GT: Maybe you could help me sort out some stuff that has been weighing on me lately? GG: Well what are friends for Jake!!!!! (x)
Sweet Jesus, Jake.
GG: Me? GG: HOO HOO HOO! GG: I'm just GG: Terrific! GG: I'm feeling so... GG: Friendly!!! GG: I clearly just want to be a good friend and bring all my AMAZING FRIENDLINESS to bear on your problems. GG: Friendlystyle! Ahahahah? GG: Shit I mean GG: Ahahahah! GT: Thats aces. Jane youre a sweetheart. (x)
Alright, alright, enough! You all remember the fucking chat. 
Regardless, it’s very apparent Jake takes things at face value. I also will cite him talking to Jane before her birthday, but not list examples, because what happened above will just happen once again. 
Okay, so he takes things at face value. What’s wrong with that? He trusts people to not lie to his face -- to not sugarcoat things or beat around any bushes. Perhaps I’m projecting a bit, but I do the same damn thing. I think a lot of people do! I don’t think reading things as fact over text is a good measure of someone’s intellect. All it does is show he has issues with communication. Okay, so he struggles with one thing. Sue me.
Doesn’t catch things right away.
Yeah okay I’m just gonna dump a few examples of this.
GT: Haha wow. Must have been a hell of a guy. TT: So... TT: You're not making any connections there? GT: Where? Huh? TT: Famous comedian, about the age of your grandma, inheriting the family name of the Baroness... TT: Not ringing a bell? GT: What are you talking about! Dirk stop speaking in riddles and keep telling the story i am on tenterhooks here! TT: Ok, well it's not like it's that important. Just a super obvious thing that'll probably occur to you later when you're looking in the fridge you don't have, at which point you'll feel like an idiot. GT: Oh my god you can be one opaque motherfucker just clue me in bro! TT: Nah, it'll be funnier this way. GT: STRIIIIIIDEEEERRRRRRRR!!!!! TT: Moving on. (x)
GT: Whats going on? TT: Took you long enough to figure it out. TT: Pages really are a slow burning class. Damn. GT: Figure what out! TT: You're asleep. (x)
This leads into the point above. His mind doesn’t work that way -- but that doesn’t mean he’s not intelligent. He needs everything laid out in front of him so he can make the connections and understand what’s happening, but there’s no real harm in this, and it certainly doesn’t dictate whether the guy is “intelligent” or not.
There are many, many more examples in canon depicting Jake as having difficulties with communication and you all can open most of his pesterlogs and probably find one. I’m not going to list anymore. But, hold your horses, I swear I’m getting to a point!
Difficulty reading.
A lot of the media Jake consumes is picture-based. Movies, comics, even the puzzles are most likely spacial and probably not riddles. It’s not far to imagine Jake might not be a terribly good reader, considering nobody was really around to make him read. Of course, his grandmother was around when he was little, so he can read -- and he can read just fine. But he probably isn’t very good at it simply from lack of practice. He also has terrible grammar, something Jane picks on him for, so it’s entirely possible that’s a contributing factor. He may just have trouble reading and writing.
Speaking from experience, I have dyslexia. As such, reading and writing are incredibly hard for me. I never read the books in my literature classes -- both in English and French -- but I did get the gist of the books (enough to get a decent mark in the class at least) by watching a movie adaptation of the novel. I don’t think it’s that far-off to think Jake may, indeed, do the same thing.
— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
NOTE: This next part is a bit hard for me to write, because I don’t want to vilify any of you. It might not have clued in on anyone or maybe you just saw Jake as a sort of comic relief and meant no harm by it. And I hope shining a light on this will make you all think twice about the guy. However, I can’t really avoid this next part, and I may get a bit emotional in it. Just a bit of a warning.
All of the above points are just me trying to say Jake probably has undiagnosed learning disabilities and perhaps autism. I don’t think I need to go into detail about how those don’t make someone “stupid”. If you think that’s the case, fuck you. I can’t argue with ableists, much less do I actually want to. 
NOTE: I wrote a thing on his speech impediments. That may be of interest too. I don’t really know, but here it is nonetheless.
My take-away message here is: just because someone struggles with socialization or other things doesn’t mean fucking anything in terms of their intelligence. Jake is very clearly smart and has the ability to read people incredibly well -- to the point of making copies of them! Perhaps it’s just a bit easy to underestimate the guy compared to other characters, though.
There are other things that muddy this up a bit, unfortunately.
— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
Trolling.
Jake is such a fucking troll. Jesus shitting Christ, does he get a kick out of acting stupid just to make the other person look silly. Or perhaps even to make himself laugh in the process. Case in point:
uu: I WILL JUST BE YOUR PATRON DUDE. uu: OR MAYBE. YOUR PATRON MANBRO. GT: Sounds pretty gay. uu: WHAT THE HELL IS THAT? GT: Whats what? uu: GAY. WHAT'S GAY YOU IDIOT FUCK. GT: Oh right. GT: Forgive me i forget you arent familiar with all of my earth lingo. GT: Its like... GT: How do i explain. GT: You know. Its a rather old fashioned term for being jolly and festive together. GT: Like "that rollicking time we had scrumming the other eve sure was gay." uu: I SEE. uu: THEN YES. YOU ARE CORRECT. uu: THIS IS GOING TO BE GAY AS HELL. (x)
Look at his goddamn face during this exchange:
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That little bastard knows exactly what he’s doing. 
And these aren’t stand-alone events! Jake is very, very silly and will use the fact others see him as stupid to have a little fun. May as well, right? And, in the process, he makes others look pretty damn stupid. 
But sometimes it’s a bit hard to tell when he’s acting stupid against when he’s genuinely not getting something. I think he even fools himself sometimes! So you have to be a bit careful about fake-outs. I’m sure even the other alphas have trouble deducing when he’s doing this -- which only adds to the myth of him actually being “stupid” when viewed on first-glace.
He probably also does this with crushes, purposefully ignoring the signs because he doesn’t want to deal with it or may not believe anyone could like him that way. After all, if he’s wrong, he may think himself to be conceded and having a big head. So, he ignores the signs, thus convincing himself the feelings aren’t there. Then he gets absolutely fucking bamboozled beyond belief to find out they actually do like him. But that’s just a little side-note.
Thinks he’s stupid.
This one is just a bit... Sad. Very sad. Jake genuinely does think he’s stupid. Quite a lot, really. 
GT: I shoulda asked where he fit into the picture if you were raised alone. I can be dumb as a bag of penny candy sometimes. (x)
Just... Man, he’s been called and treated as stupid so many times, he’s at the point where he believes it. If you asked him, he’d say Dirk is a genius, Roxy is always smart and sassy, and Jane is brilliant. (I don’t have a source for that last one but... Come on. She lectures him about grammar. Don’t fuck with me.) But when it comes to himself? He can’t say the same. Of course he then acts that way. He sees himself as a burly adventurer who is also a gentleman and tries to live up to that. No where along those lines does he think he’s intelligent. And that’s just... a little heartbreaking, really, all things considered.
— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
Can’t believe this blog is just me going, “Wanna see how fast I can talk about Jake?”, and a shit-ton of people all nodding before I talk for six hours straight. Anyway, take-home message is: Jake’s smart. Jake’s very, very smart. He’s also a himbo, but he’s incredibly smart. Just because he has learning disabilities doesn’t mean fuck-all. 
Thank you for coming to my TedTalk. There are drinks and refreshments in the back. Have a safe trip home. Remember to tip your waiters and waitresses. Jesus fuck can I run this gag any harder into the ground? Giving me language was a mistake. No but, really, if you read this whole damn thing, thank you! I hope this was as fun to read as it was to write.
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templarbear · 5 years
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So I finished a thing...
Last semester was very stressful, and to help relax, I started writing Destiny stuff again. This summer I’ve continued it, and I’ve been fixing up one of the stories I was working on before my Destiny hiatus. It’s a bit of an extension of headcanons and stuff I’ve RP’d, really fleshing out my Guardian, Dutch-37 and some of the people from his past. I thought I’d share the first chapter with the Destiny crowd here! Without further ado, I present to y’all...  37
(TW for Space Fantasy Violence, Some Language)
Chapter I
Three Guardians huddled together in their makeshift barracks, trying to block out the sandstorm which wailed around them. The barracks was a former Cabal observation post, solid, but worn from years of battle. Holes in it were crudely patched with lashed down Phalanx shields, which unfortunately left cracks for the storm to get in. As the trio sat quietly, the shield which served as the door was opened, sand and wind flying in as a fourth Guardian stumbled in.
“Thank the Light, I thought I was going to be blown away,” said the newcomer, a Warlock wearing the bond of the Praxic Order, “I’ll tell you what though, once the storm finally breaks, we’ll be reconnected to the Vanguard network.” 
    “Thanks Felix,” said the Hunter sitting on the floor, her long scarlet cloak wrapped around herself like a blanket, the sigil of the House of Devils painted on it. “Sooner we can call in a relief force and fresh supplies, the better.” As Felix entered, he shifted one of the Cabal shields, moving it across the opening to seal the barracks. The storm finally somewhat silenced, he removed his helmet to reveal a young human guardian, with close-cut black hair and deep brown skin. A streak of white face-paint marred his otherwise smooth skin. 
    “Mind you,” he said, “That’s if the Vanguard can spare anything for a small outpost on the Martian Front with only one fireteam of Guardians.” 
    “It’ll be alright,” said a Titan, bearing the mark of Pilgrim Guard. His heavy armor had seen many firefights, as evidenced by the numerous burns, scrapes, and scars which dotted its surface. “We can hold.” 
“Of course we can,” said the last Guardian, a Warlock by his armor and bond, which was that of the Crucible. “But not all of us are so good at punching things as you are. We need more ammunition, and I wouldn’t say no to some replacement troops.” The Guardians sat for a while, talking some, but mostly catching up on rest that was long overdue. At last, the storm outside began to quiet down, and they exited their barracks, wandering about their home away from home. The base was positioned overlooking a long canyon, with a low trench dug around it. Aside from the barracks, there was one building with a communications array set up, and various crates set around the area, which had been tossed around in the Martian storm. Poe-5, the Titan, accompanied Felix back to the comms building, where they began to scan channels for the Vanguard’s encryption. Dutch-37, the other Warlock, strode over to the trench line, peering through the scope of his auto-rifle across the sand as the Hunter dropped down beside him.
“See anything Dutch?” she said, lifting her own rifle to scope in. 
“I’ve got nothing,” he replied, holstering his rifle on his back. “Hopefully the Cabal stay back for a while until we can get a hold of the Vanguard.” They both turned to see Poe tapping his helmet as Felix tinkered with something inside. 
“With those two, I wouldn’t count on it,” she said, a wry tone in her voice. Dutch chuckled. 
“Have a little faith in them Caitlin, they’ll get it eventually.” She rolled her eyes inside her helmet. Across the way, Poe straightened up excitedly. 
“Guys! I’ve got a connection!” He turned toward them, his Ghost broadcasting the relay into all of their helmets. “Vanguard Actual, this is Cliffside Outpost, how copy?” The line was somewhat clouded by static, but after a moment the Guardians heard,
“-Outpost, we copy. What’s your sitrep?” 
Poe took the lead, saying, “We’ve held off several Cabal advance groups, but we’re getting low on ammunition and supplies. Requesting a relief force and resupply, over.” They waited a moment, as silence met them from the other end. 
“Alright, we’ve got a relief force heading out in half an hour. Supplies will be arriving with them. When they get-bzzt-head back to Transmat Zone 25 for pick up. We’re cycling out another Guardian unit nearby so we’ll have-bzzt-them there to catch a ride back to the Tower.”
Felix pumped a fist excitedly as Poe replied, “Thanks Vanguard Actual, Cliffside over and out.” The Guardians all shared a cheer, glad to finally be heading home for some time. Dutch smiled, and headed for the barracks. Inside, he walked over to the cot he had set up, taking down his decorations and stowing his notebooks inside of his pack. While he had a bit more in his apartment in the City, Dutch rarely brought anything with him on deployments, except for his notebooks and a few pictures with his Fireteam. Picking up the nearest one, he looked at the photo of him and Felix wearing paper Crota heads as Poe chased them with a sword.
“You know, one of these days I’ll finally get a look inside of those notebooks of yours,” Caitlin said, making Dutch jump a mile. He threw her a slight glare, sticking the last of his belongings into the pack. Finished, he sat down on his cot, removing his helmet to reveal the dark blue alloys of his Exo skin. He had two small horns above either eye, each yellow, and a yellow splatter he had Felix paint across his face. 
“Maybe Caitlin, just maybe,” he said as she removed her helmet to reveal a human, with shoulder length red hair which was tied into a loose ponytail and an array of freckles across her nose. “What makes you so interested in them anyway?” 
“Well,” she said, beginning to pack up her own area, “you guard them pretty well. I mean remember when Felix tried to steal one and you put him in a headlock?” Felix, who had just come in, shuddered. 
“Hey I was almost free when you guys broke it up,” Caitlin and Dutch both chuckled, fully aware that the small Dawnblade was hardly a bastion of physical strength. “But seriously Dutch, what’s in there that you’d choke your best friend out over it, huh?” he asked the Exo. 
“If I told you,” Dutch said, a wry smile on his lips, “then I’d have to kill you. It’s nothing, it’s just my private journals, I write notes and personal shit I don’t need people reading.” Felix raised an eyebrow, but smiled and dropped the topic.
“Alright, but if it’s full of confessions of your love for me, we both know you’ll be disappointed,” he said, his smile broadening as he packed his things. Poe looked over at him suspiciously as Felix waggled his eyebrows. 
“What’s that supposed to mean Felix? You don’t mean to tell us that some poor Guardian has been coerced into a date with you?” Felix spun around to the burly Exo, doing a little dance as he did so while Dutch and Caitlin laughed at the two.
“No tricks, no scams, no gimmicks my friend! Just a cute Titan who saw some of my action in the Crucible last time I was at the Tower!” Poe slapped a hand against his dented helmet, shaking his head. 
“If Saint-14 could see this he would weep. Oh the tragedy, how could a Titan have betrayed us like this?” he cried out in mock anguish. Felix rolled his eyes, throwing his stuff back into a pack.  As the fireteam packed, there was a slight pinging noise outside, and the sound of clanking. “Felix, go take a look would you?” Poe asked. 
Felix, grumbling, turned and walked outside, expecting to find a loose plate bouncing in the wind. As he exited the barracks, the clanking grew louder. Growing nervous, Felix tapped his helmet and opened a communications link to the others. 
“Guys? Something is up, get out here.” He raised his rifle, scanning the base. As the others joined him, he held up a hand. They halted, raising their various weapons in a defensive position. Felix strained to listen as an echo came through the sandy base- heavy, thudding marching. “CABAL!” he shouted, raising his rifle as dozens of Phalanxes marched into view at the base of the hill. Their slug rifles barked as they opened fire on the Guardians, the enormous aliens marching up the hill toward the base. The fireteam slid into the trench they had dug, returning fire. Poe watched as Dutch’s hand cannon brought one down, even as Felix’s auto rifle pinged bullets off of another’s shield. Caitlin’s Ghost took off, quickly buzzing to the communications panel, where it activated the relay before disappearing back to her. 
“Vanguard Actual, this is Cliffside Outpost, over!” Poe shouted as he fired off another round from his pulse rifle, which slammed into the head of one of the Phalanxes. 
“Bzzt- Vanguard, go ahead -bzzt- Outpost.” 
“We have hostiles attacking the Outpost, where are the relief forces and supplies?” Dutch swore as his gun ran dry. The Stormcaller tossed out a ball of lightning which expanded into a storm, downing another Phalanx. 
“Bzzzzzzzt- nearly there -bzzzzt-” Poe swore as the connection went static. The others fired some more, chasing off the remaining Phalanxes who had no doubt retreated to get reinforcements. The reprieve only lasted a minute or two, enough time to grab the remainder of the ammo they had stored away. At the base of the hill, a column of Legionnaires marched up the hill. The haggard Guardians fired back, shifting positions to dodge the grenades and slugs lobbed their way. At last, out of ammo, Felix looked over to see a Phalanx who’d reached the trenchline send Dutch flying with its shield. 
“No!” Felix cried, rage and Light filling him as two flaming wings sprouted from his back. Leaping into the air, a blade appeared in his hands, which he flung upon the Phalanx. His allies shielded their eyes as he showered fire upon the Cabal. At last, the survivors activated their jetpacks, retreating from the burning Warlock in a hurry.  
Exhausted after the battle, Felix landed, his wings fading. Caitling caught him as he slumped down into the trench, closed his eyes, and let sleep take him. The Warlock awoke to a tapping on his foot. Looking up groggily, he saw Dutch offering him a hand. As the Exo pulled him up, he noticed some other Guardians he didn’t recognize setting down crates and establishing a perimeter. 
“Relief force made it,” Dutch said. “Poe has your pack, we’re gonna go ahead and start walking to the pick-up zone.” Felix held up a hand, blocking out the bright sun. He hadn’t been training as a Dawnblade for long, and it still exhausted him every time he summoned the sword. “If you need a minute, we can wait,” Dutch said. Felix shook his head. 
“I’m alright, just tired. Let’s get going.” The two set off, meeting up with the others at the edge of the camp. The Fireteam turned back, waving goodbye both to the outpost they had called home for six months and to the Guardians replacing them there. Turning, they walked, silently, into the Martian sands. As they walked, Caitlin stepped up next to Dutch. 
“So what’ll you do when we get back?” she asked. He shrugged. 
“I have a bit of research I need to get done in the libraries there, but honestly I’m just going to take some time to relax.” He squinted, barely making out the small pickup point off in the distance. “What about you? Any fun plans?” Caitlin chuckled. 
“There may be some plans for the four of us in the works. I just gotta get in touch with a friend first, but you guys will enjoy it,” she said. Dutch couldn’t see her face, but he was sure she had another one of her wry smiles on her face. “That is, if we can manage to peel Felix away from his Titan friend.” The two chuckled, chatting to pass the time until they arrived at the zone. There, they found three other Guardians waiting for them, a Warlock and two Titans. Felix and Dutch recognized one of them, a Warlock by the name of Palus Scrawn. 
“Palus, good to see you,” Dutch said. The other Warlock nodded to him. 
“Felix, Dutch, it is good to see you. How was your deployment?” Dutch and Felix both shrugged in sync. Palus nodded, chuckling. “It was quite the same for me. My research all but ground to a halt here due to the constant stream of Cabal; I look forward to returning to the City, where I can pick up where I left off.” As Dutch opened his mouth to respond, a large gunship came into view, hovering above the assembled Guardians. Wordlessly, they transmatted aboard the ship, which sped off toward Earth. As they flew, the other fireteam all fell asleep, lolling to the sides in their harnesses. Dutch, eager for rest, and Felix, still exhausted from his use of Daybreak, also quickly fell asleep, leaving Poe and Caitlin as the only conscious members of the ship. Poe leaned in to Caitlin, keeping an eye on Palus. 
“Who is that Warlock who spoke with Dutch and Felix?” he whispered to her. She shuddered, a shadow passing over her face.
“He’s eerie. I first met him through Dutch, but my friend had gone on a mission with him. He’s one of those Thanatonauts, the Warlocks that die over and over to try and find new knowledge. I think it’s messed him up a bit. Apparently his Ghost is also somewhat odd, or at least, that’s what my friend told me.” Poe shuddered. He had died several times since his rebirth, but the idea of doing so on purpose spooked him. 
“Warlocks are so odd,” he said, turning his eyes to their sleeping companions. “Caitlin, do you know what those two research?” She shook her head. 
“Not specifically. I know that Dutch has been doing something with the Hive, while Felix works with studies of the Light. Other than that, I don’t really know.” Poe shuddered. 
“Dutch’s research worries me, whatever it is. There was this time on Luna-” He suddenly stopped, choosing to fake a yawn instead. “Ah, it’s not important.” 
She frowned as Poe fell silent, nodding as he sat back to rest. Why didn’t she know more about what her friends were researching? After all, she didn’t want either of them to wind up like Osiris, or worse, Toland. Looking up she saw that Palus had woken up and was staring at her. Without his helmet, she saw an Awoken who was missing one eye. He smiled at her, leaving Caitlin with a sense of unease which she couldn’t shake until the City came into view. 
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secretshinigami · 5 years
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Ghosts in Our Past
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Author: @sstwins For: @almostsane-things Pairings/Characters: Mello, Matt is mentioned Rating/Warnings: This is like… high PG-13. I don’t think any of it is self-harm but there is definitely self-hatred, some cursing, and mentions of prostitution. Prompt: Mello w the prompt ‘Ghosts in our past’ (feel free to incorporate personal headcanons) Author’s notes: I entirely could not communicate the depths of my Mello headcanons into my fanart, so that’s why this happened ahaha. I have a lot of very complex Mello feelings.
        Mello’s eyes slowly blinked open, and the immediate wave of pain that hit him, threatening to leave him breathless, made him wish that he could fall back into the blissful oblivion of sleep. He’d been having some sort of dream, but the disorienting aching coming from where the left side of his head lay on the pillow had jarred him roughly back into reality, with whatever dreams he’d had quickly fleeing. He must have gotten fucked up last night, the bleary thought drifted across his mind, in order to have a headache this bad. But with his new awakened state came the uncomfortably scratchy feeling of something digging into his skin below just his temples, snaking down his neck onto his shoulders until Mello sat up with a gasp, clawing at the bandages that he was sure were the source of the pain.
Oh. His breathing took a second to calm as he took in his surroundings. The rancid smell coming up from pizza boxes tossed into the corners and forgotten. Halfway hanging-on curtains dangled over the window frame, diffusing the light that came into the hovel and turning day into night. This wasn’t some crummy hotel after a one-night stand to get some quick cash, and the pain wasn’t just a bad hangover. He was in Matt’s apartment. He was in Matt’s apartment when a week ago he’d expected to be dead, after the explosions didn’t go off as planned and the building threatened to take him down along with it. Then Matt had swooped in, always the knight in shining goggles, and had whisked him away to this shitty apartment. The way he told the story, Mello had been frantic with joy and gratuitous thank you’s upon being rescued, but all that Mello remembered was waking up a day or so after the explosion, head pounding like he’d gotten concussed, and rolling over to see Matt lying next to him in bed as if they’d never been apart.
As if triggered by the memory of the event, Mello’s left side gave a powerful twitch, causing him to clench his teeth. A mirror. He had to get to a mirror. Fumbling his way out of bed, Mello staggered across the floor, nearly tripping over several discarded game consoles. Fuck, Matt was messy. He was worse than Mello was, and that was saying a lot.
The door to the bathroom was right next to the pocket-sized kitchen. The entire space was hardly livable even for one person, Mello noted as he slammed himself into the tiny square washroom, clicking the door firmly shut behind him before he even dared to think about turning towards the mirror. Matt had done some googling, told him it would heal, but he was far from being a certified doctor. Taking in a deep breath to stop his staggering gasps, Mello steeled his nerve and turned towards the glass, his heart sinking at the sight.
Matt’s shitty gauze wrapping had done little to cover up the absolute mess of charred flesh spread from Mello’s cheekbone to shoulder. Angry red inflammation bubbled around the edges of the fabric wrapping him up tight. In some places, blood had soaked through the wrappings, marring the perfect cream color with a sickening shade of salmon. Mello let his gaze travel down his body almost peacefully, holding everything back while he tried to take in a calming breath. But instead of oxygen flowing in, he felt the all-too-familiar sense of rage flaming up and burning though him. His hands acted on their own, scrabbling at his bandages and tearing them off, wishing that he could tear off the skin that lay underneath. When the final shreds of gauze were fluttering to the floor like feathers, Mello collapsed onto the toilet seat and, not for the first time that week, let out a choked sob that he couldn’t quite keep in.
He didn’t deserve this, did he? After all the shit he’d put up with for years, first with Near and then out on his own, without a penny from Wammy’s. Oh no, they’d poured the inheritance into their precious little prodigy, but Mello was smart and resourceful and girlish enough with his slender frame and wispy blonde hair. Prostituting himself back then had been an easy way to gain money, secrets, and from that, power. All he had to do was bat his eyes and act coy, and they would give him whatever he wanted. Members of the mafia, members of the government. Mello had grabbed onto all of their dirty little secrets and used that to climb to the top. And along with that, he’d learned to value himself not just for his brilliant mind, but also for his pretty face. After all, no one was paying for a hotel to hear him debate them about Plato. His intelligence was what allowed him to plan his rise to glory, but his beauty was the commodity that let him get there.
And all of that was gone now. He’d blown up the only place where he had any influence beyond being a good fuck. But that second bit wasn’t true now either, no. No one wanted a scarred-up whore, especially not one who looked as bad as Mello. This wasn’t just a cute little scratch or beauty mark. It was the kind where one look at his face made his stomach plummet until he felt like retching. It was horrific. Ugly.
And burning, still. Mello pulled himself out of his stupor to drop to his knees and dig around in Matt’s cabinets, looking for ointment, burn cream… anything to stop the pain. There were little bottles and tubes down there, but with his eyes blurred with tears he couldn’t read them to see which was what Matt usually put on. Bitterly, Mello swiped his arm across his eyes, frustrated as the tears didn’t stop from his application of force. Was this what his life was going to be now? Sprawled naked across the floor of Matt’s hovel’s tiny bathroom, not even able to take care of himself much less do anything to stop Kira. L would think he was pathetic. L would be ashamed of him. Not that he hadn’t always been. Mello had always been the bastard successor. Not the one who was the most desirable. He knew that, because if Near had threatened to strike out on his own, they never would have let him go. You keep precious things close to your chest, but Mello was a breakable commodity, not even really needed. He was the backup. Always number two, and now the only things he had managed to scrape up on his own were gone.
Eyes still completely glassed over, Mello fought against the stinging tears with another wracking fit of anger. His fingers twisted and scratched at his burned skin, striking out against himself, delighting momentarily in the way that the fragile regrowth of his flesh tore easily, causing blood to drain down his arm. But then the pain set in a hundredfold and he slammed his head back into the unforgiving wood of the bathroom door, reveling in the way that it made him see stars and momentarily took his other pain away. If it wasn’t for Matt, he didn’t think he could stand any of it. He wanted to drown himself in the bathtub or overdose on the pain pills that were so temptingly only a few inches away, but he couldn’t. Matt had come for him, saved him. Left him alone all day while he got cash under the impression that Mello wouldn’t do anything stupid.
Mello let his head rest against the door as he took in deep breaths until the hot tears subsided, replaced with an unsettling sense of forced calm. He was thinking and feeling too much. If he let it all out, it would destroy him entirely. Mello knew better than anyone about the explosive power of anger. Better to bottle it up and release it in small doses, a bit for every time he looked in the mirror until maybe one day he could handle the image in the glass without heaving.
Next to the painkillers in the cabinet was a fresh roll of gauze. Mello took a glance down at his bloody arm, reached for the bandages, and numbly started wrapping his skin back up. Maybe there was something to be said about the devil you couldn’t see. You could pretend it just didn’t exist.
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