#hs3 spoilers
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I originally didn’t pay that much attention to Satellite because int didn’t seem as lyrically complex as other songs, but after listening to it a few times, I keep thinking about the lines in Habit, “Took some time cause I ran out of energy/playing someone I heard I’m supposed to be” and “You gave me the time and the space/I was out of control and I'm sorry, I let you down.” I hear Satellite talking about someone who seems to have taken some space to figure themself out until they’re ready to talk things through, and Harry reassuring them that he’s always right there waiting for them to pull him back, that he’s never far and will be there to catch them. They shouldn’t worry, he’s stuck in their orbit (the habit that he can’t break?) and he’s not going anywhere. *cries in an uncool way*
oh my fUCKING GOD
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funny how when “if i could fly” first came out back in 2015, there was no public gf people were able to reasonably link it to because 1) it was way too personal for any of the short supposed flings he had and 2) “i’d be coming right back home to you” doesn’t make sense when his public relationships were all with people who lived outside of england. non-larries at the time could try to write it off as him just writing about something he hasn’t experienced as a storyteller, but at this point it’s become abundantly clear that the theme of “if i could fly” is a primary recurring theme in his writing and in his life that started long before any of his current day public relationships. from sweet creature to canyon moon and now love of my life, daydream, satellite, and daylight all having similar themes. it’s spanned across each of his albums, making it all the more clear that “if i could fly” was and continues to be incredibly significant
#this is a mindless ramble and i have not re-read it so it probably makes no sense but SKJFJK#long story short harry has loved louis for over a decade deal with it <3#hs3 spoilers#*
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the lyric in matilda “nothing about the way you were treated ever seemed especially alarming til now” definitely sounds like introspection after hearing he’s working through 1d trauma
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no but the fact that in keep driving Harry goes from exciting new experiences (camera, swimming pools, jumping off the roof) to domestic things (maple syrup, coffee, pancakes for two...) to international travel (passports, america) and "fame" (cocaine, side-boob) and he still constantly keeps checking in ("should we just keep driving"), acknowledges their struggles throughout the different phases of their lives/relationship ("held darkness, withheld clouds") and affirms his love ("I will always love you")
like yes, the metaphorical road/ journey of their relationship has changed and taken them new (unexpected) places and it may even be longer and harder and less smooth than they initially expected but they're still on this roadtrip together, driving in the same car.
(tell me you've been in a long-term committed relationship with the same person for over a decade and grew up with them with out telling me you've been in a long-term committed relationship with the same person for over a decade and grew up with them)
Yes. This. Absolutely.
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Also Keep Driving sounds like when they used to tweet each other random but endearing stuff..
#yk#Always in my heart#I will always love you#have fun sweet cheeks#see you at home#my hero was born#I'm laughing so bad with @louis-timlinsom#miss you baby cakes#seduced by your curls#you look sexy#in bed watching top boybands#fancy going ballroom dancing??#hs3 spoilers
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Harry placing “Love of my Life” right after “boyfriends” for the tracklist is the literal embodiment of “you’ve got my devotion but man I can hate you sometimes”
#it’s so Petty of him too#it’s like I hate you when we fight but you’re still my soulmate forever#he is so whipped😭😭#LOML being the apology for bashing louis in boyfriends#fuck you but I love you forever hahahahahah#harry#harry styles#louis#louis tomlinson#larry#larry stylinson#hs3 spoilers#hs3 leaks#Harry’s house#Harry’s home
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Love of my Life, a (different) reading
I want to start this off by saying that I love the idea that Harry Styles wrote a song called Love of my Life about Louis Tomlinson. Love it, love it, love it; love anyone and everyone who interprets this song that way, and this analysis is in no way meant to invalidate that understanding of it.
This is just a personal interpretation, based on which parts of the song resonate the most with me, my understanding of Harry’s writing style, the theme of the album, and which lyrics/words/lines (and tenses) called my attention the most.
That said…
…is Love of my Life actually about privacy and freedom? (This is gonna get long, more under the cut.)
❣️Based on Harry’s writing style:
I spoke a little about Harry’s writing patterns and vocabulary, but one thing that we’ve also noticed over the last three albums is that Harry speaks about people in a very layered way:
‘You’ is usually used as a gender-neutral song subject.
‘She’ and similar words (woman, angel) are more often a reference to himself.
‘Him’ and similar words (boyfriends) volley between a reference to himself or to a possible third person.
It’s obviously not always the case (and we have no way to verify), but Harry hardly ever writes in a way that’s on the nose, so following this pattern, personifying things like privacy and freedom by referring to them as the ‘love of his life’ fits into his pattern of layered writing.
❣️Based on the themes of the album (self-reflection):
“He’s been thinking a lot recently about autonomy, ownership, privacy. About what he should be able to keep to himself, what he should be able to simply communicate through his music without follow-up questions or prying.”
— Better Homes and Gardens
❣️Based on verb tenses:
“You were the love of my life.”
Let’s assume, for the sake of this post, that it really is ‘were’ and not ‘are’. (I always hear ‘were’, myself, but I also don’t claim to have bionic hearing, so don’t take my word for it.)
Why would Harry write one line in past tense, and the rest of the lyrics in present?
There are two ways to read it. Either:
(i) the ‘love of his life’ (person) is no longer the love of his life, but is still currently present in his life, or
(ii) he’s speaking about the ‘love of his life’ (privacy/freedom) in a nostalgic way, as if it’s not consistently accessible/available to him in his current life, but rather something that comes and goes — that he’s only able to experience in small, finite increments.
And, finally,
❣️Based on lyrics: [lyrics in bold, interpretation in italics]
(Thank you @angelsueishome for the lyrics, although I changed ‘are’ to ‘were’ based on what I hear.)
Baby, you were the love of my life
Oh, maybe, you don’t know what’s lost ‘til you find it
— the common phrase is ‘don’t know what you have ‘til it’s gone’ and the direct reversal of those themes hints at Harry having found the love of his life (privacy/freedom) again in this new situation (lockdown)
Take a walk on Sunday through the afternoon
We can always find something for us to do
We don’t really like what’s on the news, but it’s on all the time
— if you read ‘we’ here as ‘Harry and his privacy/freedom’, the stanza is pretty straightforward
Take you with me every time I go away
In a hotel using someone else’s name
— ‘you’ as privacy/freedom, again the lines are straightforward
I remember back at Johnny’s place
It’s not the same anymore
— someone mentioned he has a childhood friend named Johnny (though I’m not sure how true), but if we read the line as his nostalgia for his life before fame and how that level of privacy/freedom isn’t accessible to him anymore, it makes sense
Baby, you were the love of my life
Oh, maybe, you don’t know what’s lost ‘til you find it
It’s not what I wanted, to leave you behind,
Don’t know where you land when you fly
But baby, you were the love of my life
— three things to note here: (i) resistance to leaving ‘you’ (privacy/freedom) behind, (ii)‘flying’ as a reference to his fame and the interesting use of ‘land’ (when usually, the opposite of ‘fly’ is ‘fall’), so there’s a connotation of positivity, control and even relief, in the come down to earth (from fame), and (iii) the use of ‘but’ for the first time, signifying the acknowledgement of yearning and slight regret
It’s unfortunate,
Just coordinates
— possibly a reference to how any knowledge of his location (by paps, by fans) is usually how his privacy/freedom is taken away from him
I don’t know you half as well as all my friends
I won’t pretend that I’ve been doing everything I can
To get to know your creases and your ends
Are they the same?
— two things to note: (i) ‘you/your’ as privacy/freedom and how there’s a difference between how he experiences these things (in finite amounts) versus how his friends are able to experience them (consistently), (ii) an admission that, for however much he yearns for it, he’s not ready to give up what he has (fame) to get it back, and (iii) questioning whether privacy/freedom looks/feels/is exactly the same as what it used to be to him.
— — —
Anyway, whew! That took a lot out of me.
TL;DR: I think Love of my Life is a song about Harry’s nostalgia for his privacy and freedom.
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'you never saw my birthmark' is such an intimate lyric. like 'hey you. i love you. you're in my kitchen. i love you. you make me feel blue. you're a dream come true. i'm always thinking about you. we were so domestic together. i don't know where you are. we cared about each other. but you. you never saw my birthmark. you never saw me. you didn't get to know me. i love you. i love you. i love you.'
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harry having a song called golden and a song called daylight and both being about louis
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I'm just sitting here lamenting over love of my life with Harry being in Italy with O and Louis on the plane on his way to Chile. In loml Harry sings,
it's not what I wanted, to leave you behind
don’t know where you land when you fly
but baby, you are the love of my life
I think about how chaotic and draining on their relationship the touring and stunting must be. To each have their own careers, responsibilities and motivations that keep them separated to different parts of the planet. And it is unfortunate, but it's just coordinates. At the end of the day it's just simply geography that keeps them apart. That's all. They have love for one another no matter what. In the mean time, Harry also sings,
take you with me every time I go away
Which makes me think of the L Harry drew on his shoes. Louis might not be with him physically while they're both off working, but that doesn't mean Harry doesn't take Louis along with him. Even if its with a simple doodle, like they used to brand eachother with as teenagers.
Well…. thank you for the emotional meltdown
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Little Freak - A Letter to Her
I've been thinking about Little Freak and its delicate point of view and it's unholy how strong and raw it is. For the purpose of this analysis, we're gonna picture this song as a two voices duet: Harry and She. First verse is Harry adressing She, 'you'. Second verse is She adressing Harry. Overall, the song reads to me as a beautiful apology letter from you to yourself, because in the end, Harry and She are the same person.
Little freak, Jezebel
Those are society's feelings towards ''she'', queerness. Freaks, evil (Jezebel is one of those reaaally evil biblical figures, and she's a woman). The hatred is so strong from all sides that Harry internalized it and saw She that way. He may have now claimed those words as terms of endearment. Little freak <3
it gets a lil bit long it's ok
Stay green a little while / You bring blue lights to dreams
Okay I'm just. Tripping a bit here about something I wrote some time ago regarding Pink Floyd's song Green Is the Colour, somewhere in there. Green is a colour symbolizing envy. Harry is containing her existence in this intangible feeling: envy and dreams. (blue being the colour of psyche and stuff)
Somehow you've become some paranoia
She has been confusing him for so long, she has been associated with fear (of being rejected, judged, hated). She is the paranoia of being found out.
Wet dreams just dangling
Okay, I'm just gonna link those posts about WMS by @laurelier and @ialwaysknewyouwerepunk who called it!! Maybe the female orgasm... was indeed his all along. Dangling, in the air, Out of reach, because he hasn't come to terms with her yet, because thinking of your gender in relation to your sexuality can be really scary.
But your gift is wasted on me
Harry regrets how he has come to hate her: she's not a curse, she's a gift, queerness can be beautiful, but for some people it can be very hard to accept that part of themselves and celebrate it after years of self loathing. Harry wishes he could love her unconditionally. Or this may be about gender dysphoria: feeling like the gift of ''femininity'' is wasted on his body.
I was thinking about who you are, your delicate point of view
I'm not worried about where you are, Who you go home to
Throwback to She ''I don't know who she is, where she is'': he feels like he has overcome this period of questioning who and where she is. Now, he sees the world differently through her eyes. ''who you go home to'' may imply he's found a way to conciliate his gender identity and his romantic relationship. She's going home to his beloved and it's not an issue to anyone.
Second verse! She POV !
Did you dress up for Halloween?
This feels like She is asking Little Harry about his Halloween. Costumes and special occasions being an excuse for exploring different styles, extravagance. Embodying someone you're not in your daily life. Halloween is her moment, ever since Harry was a kid.
I spilled beer on your friend im not sorry
Growing up, Harry has found other ways to let her out. She jumps out when Harry's drunk. In those moments She is unapologetically herself, she's loud, has fun, spills beer on people and makes an embarrassment of herself. And she's not sorry about it. In those rare moments, it's all about her and not social conventions, what others may think.
Golf swing and trampoline, (baby?)maybe we'll do this again
I'm trying to vizualize the lyrics here, and golf swings and trampoline just evoke to me amplified movements, the body completely letting go and taking all the room. More than a state of mind, when She is out the body feels free. It's liberating, not to worry about how ''too much'' you are, you get addicted to that.
Track(drag?) suit and a ponytail / You hide the body all that your God gave you
It's just. very gender. Tracksuit is that one unisex garment that can dissimulate body insecurities. She only peeks out a bit at the body ends: a ponytail, a simple act of self care (reminding me of Harry braiding his hair during 1D). And the body God gave you.... What you have to do with, no matter how much you hate it. (if the actual lyric is yoga fuck my drag right)
Red wine and a ginger ale / But you would make fun of me for sure
Various mentions of alcohol, because for some time that was the condition For She to fully exist. And She knows that once alcohol wears out, he will belittle her again, try to make a joke out of her. ''I was just drunk, I was being stupid''
I disrespected you, jumped feet first and I landed too hard
Broken ankle, comma rules / You never saw my birthmark
I'm... not really comfortable going there, but this is what I take from the lyrics strictly. Comma rules... As to separate ideas within a same sentence (separating himself from her though they're the same person) or comma rules as in semicolon, tattooed as a symbol for overcoming depression or suicide. Especially associated to the broken ankle. External and internal damage. The birthmark line seems like something extremely personal to Harry's own body map. Something you would write after taking a look down at your body: through your own delicate point of view.
ANYWAY. To go back to the chorus, and the entirety of the song: more even than FL, this feels like Harry has grown in regards to her. He's done trying to figure her out, where she starts, where she ends, who she is. He just thinks of her. All of her, all the joy and pain she brought him, and all that is waiting for them.
#it has been written really quick i wanted to write it down quick i love this song#more and more#I will rant abt it all my life oh wow#no I'm lying#anyway yeah it's there it's rough#transphobia#suicide mention#somehow..#little freak#hs3 spoilers#my analysis
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Is it just me or anyone else’s brain is like: tracksuit, ashtray, pancakes for two, sit high atop the kitchen counter, hash brown, tracksuit, maple syrup, tracksuit, stay green a little while you bring blue lights, TRACKSUIT, pancakes for two, hash brown, you are the love of my life, TRACKSUIT???
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Harry Styles wrote an incredible metaphor into the song keep driving. A long term relationship is compared to a car, where there’s bound to be problems along the way, but the joy is in the journey. In this essay I will-
#it’s brilliant really#I might do one of these for each song lol#Harry’s house lyrics#hs3 lyrics#hs3 spoilers
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satellite.
#there is something about that first line that make me feel so small#hs3 spoilers#sattelite#edit#hlcreators#words#stuff
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