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#holy personal post batman

charthanry · 2 years

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BBS: Deconstructing the Entire Series (Part 5 of 13)

Welcome to my deep dive into each episode where I break down character motives, P’Aof’s delivery, and general musings of all things BBS. Basically, a scene-by-scene recap with commentary from me, your friendly neighborhood commentator. If you missed the previous installments of this post series, you’re welcome to check them out:

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

Recapping the recap: We left EP4 with Pat and Pran further blurring the lines between the boy I can’t stay away from and the one I can’t get out of my mind to nothing good ever happens when you’re near, but also, don’t go too far. Their frenemy status is put to question when a mutual blast from the past resurfaces forcing the boys to confront their growing feelings. During an impromptu sleepover, Pat unknowingly breaks Pran’s heart by revealing that he likes Ink. We end the episode with Pran crying into his pillow while unable to stop himself from adoring a sleeping Pat.

Episode Five: Seeing the Light, Lyrics to a Song, and a Confession (or AKA “Why? Do you want us to be friends?”)

Pat’s doppelganger says he’s heard and seen too much. He’s requesting witness protection.

The episode opens with Pat waking up from the smell of food cooking. He really is an adorable golden retriever who’s led by his nose. In his sleep haze, he makes the connection that something must be on fire because this is a foreign smell to him. Pat, you’ve really neglected the kitchen in that dorm of yours, huh? How have you survived this long? Have you been subsisting on the noodle truck all this time? Is that how you built such a great rapport with Uncle Noodle? By essentially eating your way to funding his mortgage?

It’s the morning after and we're still in Pran’s dorm. We are impatient for the show to reveal Pran, curious as to his state of mind from the events of the night before. How will he act now in the morning light to Pat's confession of liking Ink? We know he's harboring a wounded heart, but Pat is still frustratingly oblivious about the entire thing. Ever the stoic, Pran is a picture of calm and unperturbed as he sarcastically responds to Pat’s exclaim of fire! with yeah, at your house maybe. And Pat answers with if my house catches on fire, it will spread to yours, genius. How curious- Pat is pointing out that whatever happens to him, happens to them, that they’re in this together. As they’ve always been. Call it the red string of destiny or entwined fate, but his life’s raft is bouyed to Pran’s for better or worse. How very Jack and Rose of them minus the sinking ship and all the dying, of course.

The boys banter over Pran’s homemade breakfast, Pat angling for some of it. Pran swats his poaching hands away and asks are you my wife? Why should I make your breakfast? Make your own. When Pran turns his back, Pat swipes his toast and messily shoves it into his mouth. Pran puts on a front that he’s pissed but we know he’s internally reveling at the sight of bedhead Pat. Early-riser Pran must have taken in his fill of a snoozing Pat this morning, why oh why show, did you deprive us of seeing this on screen?

Checking his watch, Pran notes that it’s time for him to head to campus. But first he has a pesky dorm guest he needs to kick out. Pat instead negotiates waiting at Pran’s for Pa to bring him the spare key to his place. Much to our amusement, Pat attempts to win Pran over with his aegyo. Pran asks him who in the world told him this was cute and Pat calls him out by saying your face is telling me right now. This be facts yo. After bargaining that Pat will clean up the mess from breakfast, Pran begrudgingly agrees to let him stay but not before chin-booping Pat. YAASS Pran! I know you’re all with me in asking: is this the same Pran from the night before?

“I’m a little teapot, short and stout. Here is my handle, here is my spout.” I can’t be the only one hearing this, right?

The chin boop? How far you’ve come. And now allowing Pat to stay in your room unsupervised? We hope you don’t have anything lying around that shouldn’t be privy to Pat’s eyes. But also, this entire morning was so achingly wholesome that we yearn for our boys to wake up to this, and to each other, for the rest of their lives. How do we make this happen, gang? Let’s put our hearts and minds together and will it so.

Sometime later, Pat holds up his end of the deal with a spotless kitchen. So, hold on, you’re telling me that this golden retriever can be trained? Pat sits himself at Pran’s desk and flips through an open notebook. Oooh is this the sketchbook that Pran often doodles in? What are we gonna find, Mr. Pat? We should feel secondhand embarrassment for Pran, but we’re all squeeing at the possibilities instead.

His snooping is interrupted by his phone trilling. It’s Pran and immediately Pat goes I didn’t do it, I didn’t touch your stuff. Hahaha. Pran says he can sense the guilt through the phone. I can’t with these two. Pran is calling to see if Pat can deliver a file on his computer to him at the architecture building. Pat says sure and is eager for the task. Recall that Pat’s love language is acts of service and this time Pran is the one asking instead of declining. So, of course puppy Pat is clamoring to do Pran this favor. Pat asks for the password to access his computer and we can visibly feel Pran freeze.. ah, crap his password isn’t something Pat-related, is it? We’re still high on the dumpling sketches that this new bit of information is taking us for a spin.

Pran covers his face in embarrassment and spells out his password as Pat types it in. It turns out his password is PranSoCool, after a popular Thai rock band from the early-aughts to mid-2010s per wikipedia. I’m imagining Pran thinking himself as an honorary member of his favorite boy band a la the sixth member of N’Sync or BSB. Hahaha, how mortifying to reveal this to your longtime crush, but also because it’s Pran- totally adorable. C’mon Pran it’s not that bad. It could have been PranLovesPat or Pran-the-Unruly after you gave Pat so much snark for his chat ID. What’s even more telling is Pat doesn’t actually tease Pran all that much about it, I bet he finds it as adorable as we do. It’s a small peek at Pran’s quirks that he doesn’t let just anyone see. He tells Pat to make sure to keep a low profile when delivering the usb so no one, mainly his friends, spots him loitering around the architect building.

While in Pran’s computer, Pat finds photos from their high school days including those from the Christmas concert they performed together. Our boys are both sentimental fools. Pran, for hanging onto these pictures all these years. Imagine how often he looked through them during his three-year separation from Pat? This tokened evidence of the boy he loves frozen in time. And Pat, for smiling so warmly while looking through the photos, basking in the nostalgia of a time long ago. There’s a sense of longing for the Pran of years past underscoring Pat’s efforts of getting back a version of that Pran now in the present. A harder, more cynical Pran, but still him nonetheless. You’re fighting a worthwhile fight, Pat. You haven’t quite worked out the reason why you’re putting so much effort in having (and keeping) Pran in your life but you will soon.

We cut to Pat meandering through the halls of the architecture building, not heeding Pran’s warning of staying out of sight, because he catches the peripheral of Wai, the nose-flaring bull-weasel. Note that Pat is still wearing Pran’s friend/unfriend shirt from the night before but now he’s also sporting jeans. We know he didn’t show up at Pran’s in jeans last night (he was still wearing his rugby uniform) and assuming Pa hasn’t yet shown up with the spare key since Pran called shortly after Pat finished cleaning the kitchen, did Pat raid Pran’s closet for a pair of jeans, y’all? This is what I’m sherlocking and I’m planting my flag in it.

Before Wai and co. can corner Pat, he’s dragged away by someone. It’s Pran and he’s got Pat in a headlock, something we never thought we’d get to see because it’s always the reverse with them, again, how far you’ve come Pran to be so handsy now. He scolds Pat for being so careless that he was almost caught by his friends then notices that Pat is still wearing his borrowed shirt, and out in public. What if his friends saw and put two-and-two together? Pat says it’s not a big deal re-wearing clothes, especially when it smells as good as Pran. He proves it by grabbing Pran and sniffing him. The boy can’t get enough. Pran puts up a token effort of pushing Pat away, but c’mon bro, we see you – are you even trying? They’re then interrupted by Ink who teases them that for two guys who aren’t supposed to know each other, they’re awfully chummy. Girl, we agree but also way to time your entrance, you couldn’t give them another minute or ten?

Pran, flustered, leaves Pat holding the bag and runs away, ha. Ink zeros in on Pat teasing that she senses a lovey-dovey aura in the air which Pat tries to deny, but Ink argues that they’re being so obvious. Girl, PREACH. In the midst of Ink’s prying and Pat’s dodging, Pran returns and holds out his hand for his forgotten thumb drive. As Pat fumbles in his pocket for it, Ink gives Pran this hilariously probing look that makes an already flustered Pran even more so. If Bad Buddy were an anime (please, someone make BBS into an anime!), this is the moment where Pran’s face becomes tomato-red. I love her so much.

With a weak parting shot telling Pat to mind his own business next time, Pran again scampers away. Pat turns the table on Ink asking what she’s doing at the architecture faculty and implies she’s there to meet a guy, but Ink tells him to quit changing the subject. They tease each other some more as friends often do. We then see Pran watching them from afar and we’re reminded yet again that this isn’t something new for him, watching Pat and Ink interact from the sidelines only this time he’s armed with the knowledge that Pat has feelings for Ink. Ugh. He shakes his head at himself as though to knock some sense into that overthinking head of his and walks away.

It’s nighttime and we’re at the food truck, Pat must have a standing appointment with Uncle Noodle. He asks Ink how she’d like her noodles and she says with three wontons and Pat chuckles that he didn’t think there was anyone who also ordered their noodles this way. Ink asks who else does and Pat gets this faraway look in his eyes and tells Ink it’s a secret. Aww. You miss him. It’s been a whole how many hours since you last saw him. Has the scent on his shirt worn off and you need another sniff of the actual person?

Food truck uncle conspiratorially asks if Ink is Pat’s girlfriend and Pat smiles and suavely responds that he’s working on it. Ohhkaay, Mr. Smooth Operator. You were thinking of another boy not two seconds earlier but okay we believe you.

It’s sometime later and we’re in Pat’s dorm, Pa is visiting with his laundry and the two powwow over whether Ink reciprocates his feelings and if he should make a move. Pa says out loud what we’re all thinking that Pat is smart about everything else BUT THIS and instructs Pat to ask Ink out on a date. Pa says there’s a surefire way of knowing if Ink returns his feelings and outlines her four signs that someone is into you.

Cut to the mall with Ink and Pat inside a dessert pancake shop. Pa joins them and nudges Pat to employ the first sign: physical touch. Per love guru Pa, a reaction to physical touch reveals how a person feels about you. Fork-in-hand, Pat reaches for the same pancake at the same time as Ink so that their hands bump, but womp womp there’s nothing on Ink’s end as she continues eating as if nothing happened. Onto sign two: eye contact.

Pat is truly horrendous at this as he makes eyes at Ink complete with a mood-setting neighing horse in the background. He stares at her intently but with each passing second it becomes more and more hilariously awkward. Ink questions if there’s something on her face – why else would Pat be staring at her like that and takes out her phone camera to check. The siblings whisper that sign numero dos is even worse than the first one, ha!

Enter Pa with the assist on sign three: someone who is interested in you would want to know if you’re taken. She says that she heard her big bro is a hot shot on campus and asks Ink if that’s true. Ink, once again, bursts Pat’s ego by saying she wouldn’t know implying she never paid attention. Hahaha. Poor Pat. Ink seems more interested in tasting all the sweets than she is on what Pat and Pa are serving as if we couldn’t stan this girl any more than we already do!

Pat is saved by his phone ringing. It’s the music store saying his order is available for pick up. Ready to leave this pride damaging non-date, Pat takes advantage of the excuse and escapes.

In the music shop, while waiting for the store employee to find his order, Pat reaches for a hanging guitar when another hand reaches for it at the same time and their hands inadvertently touch. It’s Pran! They both stare at each other dumbfounded. Pat realizes he still hasn’t let go of Pran’s hand and quickly does so. Pat asks Pran what he’s doing there and Pran answers defensively with why can’t he be there? Is this music shop solely for Pat?

The shop employee hands Pat his drumsticks and rather than book it out of the store and back to Ink, he instead lingers and watches Pran admiring the displayed guitars. We don’t blame you Pat, it’s our favorite way to pass the time too, watching Pran do just about anything.

Pran catches him staring because of course he does. Pran always catches him because Pran himself is very much aware of Pat’s proximity. Pran receives a phone call to which Pat can’t help but eavesdrop. I suspect that it’s a call from Waisel and after he hangs up Pat comments on Pran’s good mood and tries to ask nonchalantly if that was Pran’s date calling, I say nonchalantly but Pat couldn’t be more obvious if he were wearing a flashing neon sign that broadcasted how badly he wants to know Pran’s answer. Pran doesn’t give him the satisfaction and simply responds with his usual: none of your business.

Then something amazing happens. We see the exact moment when all of Pa’s counseling and love signs reveal themselves to Pat in one fell swoop. The physical touch of both their hands on the guitar. The eye contact where Pat is the first to look away. And then Pat asking about Pran’s date. It’s dawning on Pat that Pa’s love signs are applicable to him when he’s with Pran. OMG IT’S HAPPENING. MOOTS ASSEMBLE! This is not a drill, I repeat, this is not a drill people. Sound the alarm. Alert the media. He’s finally figured it out!

To borrow from Mr. Darcy who put it so succinctly, Pat was in the middle before he realized that he had already begun.

He watches as Pran, almost forgetting his audience of one, blissfully touches a guitar with admiration. Time seems to slow down for Pat as he finds himself unable to take his eyes off of the boy standing in front of him. He’s asking himself if Pran has always been this cute beautiful stunning DISTRACTING. Has Pran always had this unique ability to encompass every single wonderful adjective in the Thai-version of Merriam-Webster’s dictionary by simply existing? Why is his heart beating so loud and fast, can Pran hear it? He swears Pran can hear it. His heart is pounding, threatening to leap out of his chest and onto the floor by Pran’s feet. Why does it bring him so much contentment to watch Pran admiring something he loves...a simple guitar? And why is his heart so excited to be near Pran? Oh Pat, you’ve got it bad. It’s like you’ve been half-asleep this entire time or breathing underwater and only now taking your first breath of fresh air and you’re realizing that the buzzing you feel in your veins means you’re ALIVE.

It’s a stunning display of emotions and Ohm NAILS IT. From realization to disbelief to confusion to panic. Ohm shows the full spectrum in a span of literal seconds. In his panic-stricken state, Pat tries to make an escape to wrap his head around what is happening to him, but there’s still the small matter of Pran blocking his exit. The two do an amusing dance of you go right, no I’m going left, when Pran finally gets fed up and asks if Pat is purposely trying to annoy him. And normally, Pat would take this moment to tease Pran with a cheeky maybe you’re the one trying to annoy me or perhaps even physically pick him up and move him aside, but he doesn’t and thus we learn about the fourth and final sign: someone who likes you can’t be themselves around you. Oh Pat, you’re so gone dude. RIP pre-realization Pat. You had a good run, my friend, but Pran owns you now.

Pat hightails it out of the music shop as if he’s being chased. Pran doesn’t know that Pat is going through an existential crisis and can only look after him in total confusion.

Pat makes his way out of the store and into the mall area, he’s lost and stumbling not knowing heads from tails. He stutters to a stop at a railing and texts Pa that he’s taking off. He shakes his head and wonders what has gotten into him.

I know Pat is going through a life-changing moment here, but I have to say this look is FIRE on him. Something about the complementary colors and the halfway rolled-up sleeves that highlights his bicep is really doing it for me. That, and the sexy awakening of feelings = HOT.

Back at Pran’s dorm, he decides to snack on some toast. He takes out the bread and reaches for the rose condense milk only to find a note attached to it. It’s in Pat’s messy handwriting and reads I’ll buy you a new one. Aww. Pran smiles at the note and oh, this is the sweetest and softest thing ever. Pran munches on a piece of plain bread, not needing the sweet condiment after all, since Pat’s note is sweet enough by itself.

He begins to draw the bottle of milk and the attached note in his sketchbook. We’re then shown a flashback of earlier in the mall when Pran happens on Pat and Ink in the pancake shop. Where without chaperone Pa, they look like they’re on a date. Oh no. Just when Pran allows himself this small moment of relishing something sweet that Pat has done for him. Damn you, show, why are you so adept at both giveth and taketh away. Pran proceeds to cross out his doodle and adorably munches on his bread lost in thought.

I love that Ink is on the other side of the camera here. You go on and make love to that camera, girl.

It’s the next day and in between classes, Pat seeks advice from Korn of all people by asking who do you think can make our hearts beat faster? To which Korn ridiculously responds a ghost! Hahaha. Pat shakes his head as if to say why do I even bother. But Korn regains composure and says he’s joking, and states isn’t it obvious? Our hearts beat faster when we’re with someone we like. To which Pat reasons that maybe our heart speeds up from excitement? And Korn says that could be true, but how you can really tell is if you’re jealous then you like that person for sure. Okay someone must have swapped my usual for decaf because crazy Korn is actually making some sense here? Pat seems to agree and decides to test out the theory.

He shows up at Pran’s and asks if he can come in. Okay, now we know something is really going on and Pran has to be picking up on it too, right? Because under normal circumstances, Pat would just barge in, not politely ask permission first. Pat explains he’s there for the earbuds he lent to him. That’s so weak, my dude, did you come up with that on the walk over?

Pat enters Pran’s room and starts asking him question after question. Has he eaten yet? Yes. What’s he working on? His song. Why isn’t he in class? Don’t have any today. Whoa there, Pat, do we need to get you a notepad to write down Pran’s answers? Are you being quizzed later?

He walks over to Pran’s desk and starts checking out the photos tacked on the wall. He peers at one of Pran posed with a girl and recalls Korn’s words about being jealous and determines that he’s not feeling it. Right when he’s about to ask Pran another question, Pran’s phone rings and it’s Wai. He tells Pat to be quiet as he answers.

Pat listens in on their conversation and learns that Wai has been invited to Pran’s home for dinner on numerous occasions, that Wai and Pran’s mom get along very well, enough so that Dissaya asks after Wai from time to time. The two make plans for Wai to come have dinner with Pran’s family on Saturday. While listening to all this, Pat’s face grows poutier and poutier by the second. His leg starts tapping impatiently. He decides he can’t take being neglected another second, not for Wai of all people, and starts making noises to get Pran off the phone.

After Pran hangs up, Pat comments that the two of them seem close. Pran says of course, they’re friends. Pat asks if Wai is coming over to Pran’s house and comments that his mom hates having people over. Aww, Pat. Pran confirms what Pat already figured out that Pran’s mom loves Wai and Wai is always complimenting her cooking.

Pat then takes a different approach and asks if Wai has ever spent the night at Pran’s dorm? Pran quickly says no and we can see Pat visibly sighing in relief that he at least beats Wai in this one thing. Only for Pran to take it back and say actually, Wai has, and not only that but he slept in the same spot that Pat did**. Pat doesn’t take this news well and demands why Pran didn’t tell him and then leaves in a huff. Pran is left wondering what the hell has gotten into Pat lately and why he’s been so weird. He even left behind the earbuds that was his pretense purpose of even coming over. Pat says they’re yours and lets himself out of the dorm leaving behind a bewildered Pran.

**We’re betting Pran didn’t watch Wai sleep with pure, unfiltered adoration even as his heart was breaking. That the one unknowingly responsible for breaking his heart is the very same boy who breathes life into him every day, spanning years and distance. You’ve got Wai beat in more areas than you know, Pat. With Pran, it’s not even a contest. You win every time. And we can’t wait for you to be certain of this fact, because it’s coming.

Cut to later in Pat’s dorm as he sits and contemplates all this new and confusing information. We’re then treated to a high school flashback of the two of them in the school’s quad working out what to perform for their Christmas concert. Pran says he wants to compose a song that conveys that sense of born to be together, growing up together and seeing each other every day, where nothing happens in the beginning but then without realizing it, their feelings...and here Pat finishes his thought for him by saying... their feelings change. And Pran does this blink, and you’ll miss it expression where he’s hopeful that Pat gets it, too. Oh, Pran. Just a little longer bud, he’s nearly there.

But idiot that Pat is laughs and says they change and become rivals, he says Pran is talking about their situation only we know that’s not what Pran was getting at, at all. Pat, you idiot. Pran even stutters out a huh? He was speaking his thoughts (and feelings) out loud, caught up in the moment. And our boy Pat is too dense to pick up on it. Ugh. And he’s sooo close too! He narrowly misses the forest for the trees by pointing out Pran means them, he’s talking about himself and Pat. Which yes, he is, but not as rivals you knucklehead.

I can’t decide if Ink is right – if high school Pat is hotter than university Pat? But I do think that four-years-later Pat leaves them all in the dust. Because adult Pat is DEVASTATING.

Pran then asks Pat if he’s ever had a secret crush on someone (I mean, hello? Pat, he’s literally spelling it out for you?) and at Pat’s confused laugh Pran explains that Pat seems to always end up with whoever he likes so he’s just curious if there was someone he ever secretly liked. Pat responds that he’s genuinely insecure and hesitant to approach the person he likes too. Pran jots down the word insecure and says he likes it. That feeling of not knowing if it’ll turn out good or bad. You’re afraid to feel more. You hesitate. You want to jump in but you’re afraid of getting your heart broken. You want to step back but at the same time you also want to seize the chance. Pat gives him a considering look then grabs his notebook and signs his name to it saying he’s taking partial credit for this idea, and lays claim that this is now THEIR SONG.

I know I said Pran’s bravest moment on the show was when he asked Ink if she liked Pat, but this flashback is another example of how courageous our Pran is, and it’s only by doing this recap that I’ve really paid attention to what he’s saying (and not saying) here. He’s literally telling Pat how he feels under the guise of songwriting and for all intents this is as close to Pran confessing his feelings for Pat to Pat as he’s ever gotten. And stupid Pat, completely mind-skates over it. But not three-year-older, uni Pat who is remembering this scene much differently now. But the million-dollar question for Pat is, does Pran still feel this way? Or has Pat’s realization come too late?

Pat is jostled out of his memories by Pa stopping by with dumplings to share. She surmises that Pat is depressed because the love signs didn’t work on Ink. She sees Pat’s current state and encourages him to push forward with Ink since he obviously likes her so much (does he though? What is it with you siblings and your knack for missing things entirely?) But credit to Pa for asking if there is someone else that Pat likes over Ink? Wishful thinking here, Pa? Hmm? But Pat just shakes his head and denies it. You know it’s SERIOUS FEELINGS if he can’t even discuss it with Pa.

Cut to the day of the music contest and we have Pran and the architects psyching themselves up for their performance. Pran apologizes for not finishing his song in time so that they now have to play one of his older songs. Uh oh, don’t tell us it’s Just Friends?! Pran, how could you?! There was no other song in the entire discography of Thai music that you could cover instead?

Pran and Pat run into each other turning in their song selections. It seems it’s been a minute since they’ve seen each other last, and this makes me sad. They’re so much better together than apart. And to imagine that they were both separately hurting and pining for the other across the hall all this time. More telling is they’re now acting differently towards each other. Gone is the fun banter and playful teasing. Pat, because of his realization doesn’t know how to act normally around Pran and Pran, because of his knowledge of Pat’s feelings for Ink, holds himself at even more of a distance than usual. Just look at that wide space between them. It’s an entire chasm.

Pat asks if Pran is ready for his performance and Pran inquires about Ink’s whereabouts. Pat asks him why he’s asking about Ink and Pran says because he wants to know. Pat responds with why does he want to know? Boys, just kiss each other already. I can’t take much more of this tension. Then Pran says because Ink should be here supporting Pat and AWW, PRAN. But before Pat can respond they’re interrupted by a weasel in the form of Wai. Pran leads Wai away as Pat watches on. His heart heavy that Pran’s attention is now elsewhere and no longer on him. Aww, he’s in the same room as him and still misses him so bad. We hate it here.

The architects are next to perform and Pran gets on the mic to introduce the song. Watch Pat’s expression carefully here as he’s reacting to several things happening at once. First, at Pran’s words at describing their relationship in high school. He calls Pat his friend whom he co-wrote this song with, not simply ‘a’ friend but ‘my’ friend, and yes, there’s a difference. Saying a friend could be anyone from high school, any former classmate, someone meaningless to Pran, but he qualifies it with MY friend instead, and we know the significance of this qualifier because Pran does not have many friends, not any whom he publicly makes claims on like this and definitely not while said boy is present. So, can we blame Pat’s face for reacting to Pran calling him his friend even if it’s past tense?

Secondly, Pran takes it another step further by looking directly at Pat and says he hopes everyone (Pat) likes it. Is he challenging Pat to read between the lines? To really LISTEN and HEAR the lyrics? This, right after Pat having remembered the flashback of them writing this song together however many days ago? Or is Pran challenging him in a different way here? Is he saying, you’ve made your choice with Ink and now this is me saying good-bye to my feelings for you. I have to let you go, for myself. So, I’ll say good-bye by singing this song we wrote together one last time. He then proceeds to do just that and sings it directly to Pat. And really it can go either way here and is left up to individual interpretation because this show is just THAT good.

Pat stands there listening to their song and it’s probably causing his insides to twist in sheer happiness but also confusion and doubt. But then Pran unknowingly hits Pat where it hurts by doing the solo guitar part with Wai and beaming as he does, something he used to do with Pat. Oh no. Then it all comes rushing to Pat. The disastrous music concert where Pran’s parents showed up, then Pran’s immediate transfer away from him, and he’s reminded quite cruelly of their family rivalry JUST as he was coming to terms with his feelings for Pran. And then seeing Pran so carefree up there on stage with Wai, who doesn’t come from a family that Pran’s mom hates. Who can blame Pat for feeling that Pran has so easily replaced him? That Pat is no longer orbiting the space next to Pran, the space that Pran used to carve out for him now being taken by someone else.

Overcome with emotion, Pat can’t take it anymore and leaves the concert. Pran notices from the stage and watches Pat leave. There is a hint of concern in his expression as he wonders if this song hit Pat just as much as it has himself.

I stand by my statement that Ink is Pat’s female-Korn only with less eyebrows.

Pat watches Pran and the architects as they wait to find out the outcome of the music contest. Ink finds him and great friend that she is asks him what’s going on with him. Pat beats around the bush and she teases him to just spit it out because it sounds like he’s working himself up towards a confession. He says what if he is? He explains that he’s liked her for so long ever since high school but was always too afraid to do anything about it because he didn’t want to lose her as a friend. She then asks him what about now? Why isn’t he afraid now? And he says he doesn’t know, maybe he’s grown up.

She smiles at him knowingly and tells him she doesn’t feel like his words are a confession, but more like he’s getting something off his chest. She teases that he’s being so obvious. Then points out how relieved he seems now that he’s done it. She says if it was a true confession, he would be more afraid of having his heart broken rather than relieved for getting it done and over with. He immediately apologizes to her, and she lightens his guilt by telling him even if it was a true confession, her answer would still be no. He asks her why and she says she has plenty of hot friends already, she doesn’t want to lose the one crappy friend she has and playfully nudges him. Oh, this girl, we shall erect a shrine in your likeness, our goddess.

She then says she can tell that Pat has something weighing on his mind and when he feels ready to share, she’s here to listen. I love that even though she senses what’s going on, she doesn’t push Pat to talk about it. She instead assures him that she’s there when he’s ready.

I love their friendship so much. I wish we all had a Pat and Ink in our lives. Someone who gives it to us straight but then always makes sure we know it comes from a place of love.

We find out the architects are crowned the winners of the Freshy music contest at the surprise of absolutely no one considering we didn’t get to hear any of the other bands actually perform, haha. Wai of course doesn’t hold back and gloats right in the engineers’ faces. Ugh. This is gonna get ugly, isn’t it?

That night, Pat and his crew show up at Wai’s bar where the architects are celebrating their victory. Why, Pat? Of all the bars you could have gone to did you choose to come here? Waisel, still high off of their win over the engineers, rubs it in by telling Pat and his crew to come on in and that he’s reserved a table for them far in the back in case they can’t handle the sound of their celebration. Ugh, what an asshole. Did the engineers gloat this much when they beat them in the rugby match?

And Pran is just standing there letting Wai go off and just waiting to see what Pat does. As if Pat is the one who needs to be reined in and not Wai?? And Pat sees Pran just standing there not saying anything, letting his boy run his mouth. He determines where Pran’s loyalty lies and the choice he’s made. And above the losing and gloating, this is the unexpected gut punch that lands on Pat. Man, just looking at Waisel’s face, if I was there and a foot taller, I’d sucker punch Wai so bad here. Don’t tell me he doesn’t deserve it. Quick, somebody get me a ladder.

I don’t know if it’s the angle here, but Ohm is like head and shoulders taller than everyone. And it even looks like he’s slouching. Damn Ohm, share some of that vertical wealth dude.

Pat, to everyone’s surprise, even Pran’s, does the unexpected and diffuses the situation by telling Korn and the gang that they’ll go somewhere else, that he’s had enough for today. He looks at Pran as he leaves and the unspoken tension between our boys could fill an entire novel (or this recap post, ha). Pat is saying I’m walking away because I don’t need you to see me lose my temper, but right now I am out of my mind jealous of you and this Wai character. I’m choosing to walk away from you because if I don’t this will escalate and the person it will hurt the most is you and I can’t have that. And Pran is looking on saying what has gotten into you lately? What is going on in that head of yours? Have you gone to a place that I can’t reach? That I can’t follow?

Later that night, Pat sits on the steps in front of their dorm building waiting for Pran to come home. He most likely already tried his dorm and his phone and didn’t get an answer. And rather than give Pran the opportunity to ignore his knocks and texts, he’s gonna sit right here and wait for Pran to show up. Pat is definitely not sober which leads us to believe that after leaving Wai’s bar, he got totally hammered to wipe the memory of Pran singing with Wai from his psyche. He chugs some water to sober himself up before seeing Pran. He checks Pran’s IG and sees a post of him and Wai drinking it up. Oh, don’t do this to yourself, Pat.

Pran rolls up on the back of Wai’s motorcycle. Oh God, this is the worst person to show up with right now. And Pran is not entirely sober himself. Pat sees them before they notice him and the slight shake of his head just says it all, great, of course you’re showing up with this guy. Choosing to ignore Wai completely, Pat gets up and gently tells Pran to come to him. To ignore Wai, it’s just them now, and to come to him. Wai does this gross faux flexing as if he’s gonna mess Pat up bad and Pat just shakes his head at him like back your ass on down SON, you don’t want a piece of me, not tonight. Consider this your warning. And I’m just over here like, daddy don’t warn him, just do eet, I want to see.

Pran appeases Wai and tells him he’ll just go see what Pat wants. And this is where Pran makes his first mistake. He puts up the same front that he always does when they have an audience and asks Pat what the hell do you want? Is it so hard to accept defeat? Only Pran doesn’t know that the rules of the game have changed on him. Pat is not here to be the counterpart to their public rivalry. And Pran’s display for Wai’s benefit hurts. It wounds him deeply and so Pat counters with his own verbal jab, defeat? By that lousy song? Am I supposed to feel something? Pran finally picks up on it and realizes Pat isn’t playing, not tonight. So, he tells him to go. He says you’re drunk, don’t act silly (foolish). This isn’t the time. But Pat doesn’t listen, and this is where Pran makes his second mistake, he puts his hands on Pat and demands he quit this right now and pushes him.

Pat then asks him why? Why can’t he be (silly) and say what he wants to say? He looks over at Wai and says are you afraid he’ll find out? Do you care about him that much (more than me?) and Pran pushes at him some more to get him to quit talking. And Wai chooses this moment to butt in, ugh, and yells at Pat to stop messing with his friend. And Pat just rounds on him and says mind your own business, this is between him and me. You have no say here.

Pran holds Wai back and Wai turns on him and asks point blank what is your problem with this guy? Pran doesn’t answer and Pat goads him by chiming in with tell him, go ahead and tell him, I dare you. Pran races back and grabs at Pat again and ask him what the hell is his problem. And as well-acted as all this is, it hurts to see our boys like this so you can stop it right now, please, both of you. Let’s go back to the dimple-poking and chin-booping.

Pat has kept his hands to himself this entire time and just lets Pran grab him and push him again and again. And only when Pran screams in his face does Pat lose it and grabs him back and asks him why can’t he say it? Why is it that Pran can only be nice to him when no one else is around. Isn’t he important to him, too? Doesn’t Pat matter to him? Why does it have to be like this? Acting like they’re enemies when they’re not. Acting like there isn’t something more between them when there is. He’s tired of this, isn’t Pran?

Wai sees the two of the grabbing onto each other and decides he’s seen enough. He pushes his way in between them and lands the first punch on Pat. Pat immediately gets up and gives it back just as good. And the entire fandom rejoices, I’m kidding, though not really. No, really, I kid. Wai showed up at the wrong moment and suffers the wrath that is Pat at the height of his emotional breakdown. Though he’s not innocent, Wai should not be here to take on Pat who is itching for a fight. I will only say this once and never again, but I reluctantly commend Wai for not physically interfering until he saw Pat grab at Pran. There I said it. Now I must go sanitize my hands for typing that out.

After knocking out Wai with that single punch, Pat stalks his prey and advances for a would-be beat down and if not for Pran rushing in to hold him back who knows how much more this would have escalated. I hope Wai has medical insurance. Pran tells Pat to stop and to calm down. And to his credit, he turns around and tells Wai the same thing and tells him to go home. Wai looks at him and asks point blank again if he’s sure there’s nothing going on here between him and Pat? And here Pran makes his third and final mistake, he says like I said, nothing means nothing. Wai believes him and takes off.

I like the coloring of this scene a lot. I also like that it wasn’t filled with overly distracting background music. It’s just enough so you can feel the building tension. Also, the actor placement is intentional too. Look at the space between Pran and Pat. The chasm has widened, and we’re left thinking can Pat ever bridge that gap again? Basically, I just like all the directing and editing choices made here.

Pran stays long enough to make sure Wai leaves. He then turns to look at Pat on the ground and there are no words, but his look says it all. He is disappointed. He is confused. He doesn’t understand what brought all this on. But he’s not going to stay and listen to anything Pat has to say. He’s done with Pat. He turns away and leaves Pat on the ground, alone.

Pat gets up and walks over to the steps. He pulls an item from the gift bag, seemingly the reason why he waited for Pran to come home in the first place, and pulls out the promised new bottle of condensed milk. Oh, Pat. You done messed up, completely. He seems instantly regretful over what transpired tonight even if it wasn’t his intention, he recognizes that he’s at fault, but first a gratuitous shower scene to sober himself up.

Thank you show, for this scene. But also, damn Ohm, how tall are you? You actually have to duck to wash your head. And here I am lugging around a ladder just to punch deserving weasels.

A freshly showered and sobered Pat knocks on Pran’s door to no answer. We note that Pran’s door tag is flipped to the frowny side, aww. Pat next tries Pran’s phone and that goes unanswered as well. Deciding he needs some air, Pat heads to the rooftop only to find Pran there. He sighs, hesitates and wonders if he should just leave him be for the night. But never one to shy away from confrontation and getting things out in the open, Pat pushes on and walks forward.

Pat doesn’t immediately say anything and Pran makes a move to go, but Pat turns and faces him and credit Pran for staying and staring right back.

This whole conversation was too good that nothing I write could ever fully encapsulate the show’s incredible dialogue, so I’ll be typing it out mostly verbatim. I’ll share my commentary at the end.

Pat asks why did he play that song? Pran doesn’t understand, why can’t he play that song? It’s his song, he wrote it. Pat says but it’s the song they played together. And Pran goes, so? Oh, is that why you were so angry? Because of this little thing? Pat replies with little thing? Does it (read: I) mean that little to you? Pran goes dammit, Pat, what’s gotten into you? And here Pat lays himself bare for Pran: I didn’t like it. I didn’t like seeing you play that song with someone else. And Pran’s response is: Pat, you’ve got to stop doing this to me. You and I are nothing to each other. We can’t even be friends. And cue Pat’s monologue:

You’re right. How can we be friends if our parents despise each other? How can we be friends if we live next door to each other and can’t even talk? How can we be friends if we’re forced to compete against each other in everything? You know what, when you were away, it was so peaceful for me. I didn’t have to compete against you. I wasn’t paranoid. I didn’t need to know what your GPA was. I didn’t need to know which sports you were involved in. But you know what? It was so depressingly lonely for me.

Pran is stunned by Pat’s confession because depressingly lonely doesn’t even come close to what Pran experienced those three years apart from him. At least Pat had Pa, his friends, his familiar surroundings. Pran was ripped away and dropped into an entirely new environment, and this is a lot for someone who relies heavily on having a set routine. And the only person who could have eased that loneliness and burden for him lived on his computer, frozen in pictures.

Pat asks, what we have now, what should we call it? If we’re not enemies, do you think we can be friends? And Pran answers Pat’s question with one of his own: Why? Do you want us to be friends? And Pat stares and stares at Pran understanding that the answer to this question will determine everything going forward between them. And Pran is not going to give him an answer until Pat does so Pat has to be brave and honest for the both of them. And he does with a very emphatic, no. No, he doesn’t want to be just friends with Pran.

Pat is saying: “I’m just a boy standing in front of another boy asking him to love me.” Only on a Bangkok university rooftop instead of Notting Hill. Not knowing that Pran already does and always has.

With that no said, he steps forward and Pran meets him. And Pat just goes for it and kisses him. He pulls away and stares at Pran gauging his reaction and whether or not he wants this, giving him an opportunity to say his own no. And Pran takes a moment to war with himself and decides in that split-second that yes, he wants this, very much so. He’s going to allow himself to have Pat, to have this moment, right here and right now. Screw everything and everyone else. He’s going to do this because he wants it. For himself. And for the next 28 seconds, possibly for the first time in his life, Pran lives for no one else but himself. And that, friends, is the courage of one Pran Parakul to finally take and take and take.

And then the music soars and so does all our hearts as we are gifted with the most tender and emotional kiss of all BL to date. You can audibly hear the breathing between them, can see the tight grip that Pran has on Pat’s neck, anchoring him in place as though he doesn’t want him to ever leave, and Pat answers by pulling Pran in even closer by cradling the back of his head with both hands as if he needs him to be closer than he already is, saying I’m here, I’m here, I’m not going anywhere. And they both have their hands and lips on each other as though this is where they were meant to be all this time. They just took the long way to get here. And everything that has happened between them has led up to this moment. And we are right there with them. Our boys, giving into their feelings, at last.

They chase each other’s mouths for a few more kisses and then pull away. And the utter joy and contentment on Pat’s face is everything. Like he’s finally home and everything he knows of himself is wrapped up in this boy, his childhood, his present, and all the unknowns of the future is all there in Pran. That it all makes sense to him now. That every piece of the puzzle slots in just so because Pran reciprocates these feelings. This moment right here as Pat stares into Pran’s face is when Pat decides Pran is his priority from this point forward and this fact never changes for him, not even years later. Pat’s commitment and devotion to Pran is unshakable. Pat can look back on this as the definitive moment where Pat chose Pran to be the center of his everything.

But Pran’s face doesn’t mirror Pat’s. Pran seems shattered by their kiss. And not in a he’s overwhelmed by Pat kind of way, but more of a tormented what have I done kind of way. His face contorts painfully as he breaks down into tears and we hurt for him. He then flees and leaves behind a reeling Pat.

Pat watches Pran take off and stumbles backwards as if it finally hits him what this all means for himself and for Pran. How this changes everything.

I’m no cinematic expert, but this wide shot of Pat right as the aftermath of the kiss hits him is très magnifique. Or as tumblr critics like to say *chef’s kiss*. I think it’s meant to show how small Pat is compared to how much larger the world is that surrounds him and Pran, illustrating what they’re about to go up against. It really is them against the world.

This concludes our fifth hour with our boys. Full disclosure, this ending and the ones for EP8 and EP11 are the three times in the show where I physically stood up with fists raised and cursed at the screen, yelling IT DOES NOT END LIKE THIS?!! NOOOO!! I was quite literally fists of fury at the injustice of it all. How dare you, show, for leaving us hanging for an entire week before finding out what happens next. Damn your cliffhangers, P’Aof. Why are you so masterful at leaving us wanting more?

First of all, Pat, you know it’s not really love if you bring your little sister on your supposed date, right? You’d want the other person all to yourself. And if you were certain of your feelings, you wouldn’t need a third person to come along and confirm them for you. While hilarious and mostly meant for laughs, the entire pancake shop scene served a more intentional purpose. We’re meant to learn about the four signs as we watched Pat epically fail at applying them to Ink. We’re also meant to see that Ink clearly is not interested in Pat in that way as she told Pran in EP4, but it was important that Pat learns this for himself. And it was necessary to give Pat a barometer on which to measure the four signs when applied to Ink and how different he felt when applied to himself with Pran.

Pat’s epiphany was beautifully portrayed. I absolutely love that Pat was completely undone by it. More so because we got to see the very moment when it happened, it wasn’t offscreen like Pran’s. Seeing Pat going through his realization really makes me wonder how Pran would have handled his? I bet he was in middle school when he realized his feelings for Pat were less than rivalry-fueled and more than I just want to be his friend. I bet it took him by surprise as much as it did Pat. I can see it all so clearly...

How one day a breeze flutters through the open window of their classroom and ruffles Pat’s hair just so and it causes Pran to stare. How a week later, he happens to walk by and hears Pat laughing loudly at a joke and the sound suddenly makes Pran’s chest feel warm. How he watches Pat strut to the chalkboard to answer a math equation causing Pran’s fingers to tightly grip his own piece of chalk, while standing at that same board a mere a foot away writing out his own solution. How Pran freezes when Pat reaches around him, bumping his waist, for a piece of chalk and Pran can feel his neck heat from his involuntary blush at Pat’s touch.

I picture his heart speeding up whenever Pat is nearby. How he has to run away and sneak into an empty classroom clutching his chest, steady his shaking hands, and ask himself what is happening. And how it happens again the next day and the day after that and all the days since. Where eventually Pran can’t deny it any longer and admits to himself that he only feels this way when Pat is near. And Occam’s razor explains that this can only mean one thing.

And now things are different for Pran. I can see him trying to keep his face from morphing into heart eyes when Pat accidently brushes his shoulder on his way to lunch. How he has to avert his eyes when Pat changes out of his PE clothes. How he has to school his face when Pat does something ridiculous to get a rise out of him. How he secretly wants to laugh or even beam in response but holds back for fear that such an act would give him away. How he finds himself alone in a classroom with a slumbering Pat and has to stop himself from reaching out and brushing Pat’s hair away from his forehead. How he doesn’t put up that much of a fight when Pat steals his milk carton from his lunch tray. And how later that same day he doesn’t hide the dimple in his cheek when he finds a yogurt drink on his desk knowing who left it there as payment. So Pran watches Pat, tries harder at beating him at everything to get him to look his way more often, and feels his heart growing in size to accommodate this boy and his enormous feelings for him.

I picture him watching Pat play soccer with the sun framing his profile, a sight that captures his breath making Pran commit it to memory, a picture-perfect moment when the warm sunlight and the sunshine boy melds together as one. How he was never quite able to keep his gaze from flickering back to Pat when he was supposed to be feigning reading his history lesson on the bleachers. How he has to stop himself from cheering when Pat scores a goal because that’s not something a rival would do. And how he lingers just a bit longer than necessary after the game ends to watch Pat down an entire water bottle and tries not to notice the bobbing of his Adam’s apple as he swallows. I can see it all, can’t you? And I wish we got to see more of it in the flashbacks. I wish we got to live it alongside Pran.

I want to address Pat’s depressingly lonely statement and really the entire rooftop conversation. Has there ever been a more emotive way of saying you missed someone than this? To reveal that he wasn’t just lonely without Pran, he was depressingly so. He was walking through a haze, barely functioning, a shell of himself. And after a long time, he adapted and going through the motions became routine but there was always something unsettled about his life. And he knows it and sees it now. It’s because Pran wasn’t there beside him. To joke with him. To compete with him. To always extend that finish line just an inch further. To challenge him. To dare him to be a better version of himself. Pran wasn’t there and he missed him. So fucking much. He didn’t realize how much until he saw him in that alley right after Pran landed that kick to his chest.

And how for a while he was even angry at Pran for leaving, even though he knows logically that it wasn’t Pran’s doing, but he was still pissed that Pran could so easily leave him behind. Was he someone that could so effortlessly be tossed aside and abandoned? But now Pran’s back and things are almost as good as they used to be.

He didn’t realize it then but having Pran back in his life it’s loud and clear to him now, that he wasn’t himself without Pran. He was fucking lonely and seriously, fuck their parents. They taught them to hate each other. They groomed them to be rivals. But it was never Pat and Pran’s fight, he knows that, and he knows that Pran knows it too. But Pat wants to tell Pran something very important here: the joke is on their parents. Because Pat never hated him, not even a little bit.

And what they have now? He doesn’t know what this is. He doesn’t know what Pran wants them to be. But he wants to find out. With Pran. He wants to explore and navigate this thing between them. Because Pat knows that Pran feels it too. He knows it just like he knows how deep the dimples in Pran’s cheeks get when he’s happy, truly happy because Pat himself has been responsible for putting that look on Pran’s face countless times before. So, this is all of Pat, stripped and naked, standing in front of you asking what do you have to say to that, Pran?

Let’s talk about Pat’s “no” on the rooftop and how it is a direct juxtaposition to his “yes” in EP4. How when he answers yes to liking Ink he does so impulsively and without care, but his no here to Pran is drawn out and given the time and breadth to fully convey that he means it, like really, MEANS IT. He does not want to be just his friend. And I love how the show chose to sum everything Pat is feeling in one succinct word: no. One simple word and then relying on Ohm to DELIVER it. Bravo P’Aof for trusting your actors.

Also, note that Pran throws Pat’s question back at him. He wants Pat to answer, none of this let’s both answer at the same time bullshit. He wants to know what Pat wants because Pran has always known what he himself wants but needs to hear it from Pat’s own mouth. And we can all relate, for how many times have we wanted the other person to make their feelings known first? Afraid to be the first one to put ourselves out there, to risk our hearts especially in Pran’s case when his heart was given away long ago only the person receiving it had no idea what kind of treasure he’d been entrusted with.

Look at the way they’re looking at each other. Officer, I swear they’re in love.

This episode obviously veered from the first four in that we got to see things unfold from Pat’s point of view instead of Pran’s. It’s curious that from Pat’s perspective, he doesn’t see Pran as pushing him away or declining his presence. He sees it as Pran wanting him there, but not being able to vocalize it. See the two negotiating over breakfast for Pat to stay and how quickly Pran gives in, see also how easily Pran allows Pat into his room for the earbuds. And then note how Pat leaves on his own without needing Pran to kick him out. Even in the music store, it’s Pat who leaves first. Perhaps from Pran’s perspective and in his mind’s eye, he’s putting up a front to keep Pat at arm’s length, but we see things differently from Pat’s view, that Pran wants him there he just needs to believe that it’s not coming from himself but is of Pat’s doing. That Pat WANTS to be there and keeps COMING BACK despite Pran consistently giving him an out is the key difference for Pran.

Growing up they couldn’t talk to each other when others were around, but they developed a mode of conversation without words where one immediately picks up on the other’s needs even distorted through a tin can. This is Pat hearing what Pran doesn’t say across the invisible strings of a metaphorical tin can. And we’re counting on Pat to continue to listen for what Pran doesn’t say as he tries to distance himself from Pat in the next episode. Because what Pran doesn’t know is that Pat is already all in, his cards are laid on the table and he’s showing all hearts. And he’s patiently waiting for Pran to push all his chips in too.

):):):):):):):):)

And that’s a wrap on my deconstruction of EP5, thank you SO MUCH for reading this far and for reliving the episode with me. This was a monster of a recap and not gonna lie, it totally got away from me. Not my fault. It refused to be contained. Up next, we have EP6 featuring one of my favorite drama tropes: THE CHASE. I can’t wait!

#bad buddy #bad buddy series #pat x pran #bbs #recap #deconstructing the entire series #ep5 #okay time for my own confession here #I neglected 1.5 days of living to get this to you guys #hahaha #no but really #I should probably go outside and touch some grass or something #of all the episode recaps I've done thus far this is the one that grabbed me and wouldn't let me go until I had it written #I blame the amazing content and acting for making me neglect work and going outside and life in general #I should really see my family before they file a missing persons report I'm kidding #mostly kidding #anyway I hope you enjoy reading as much as I enjoyed writing this #But HOLY CRAP BATMAN this was a beast 10700 words!#those 4k 5k 6k worded posts are waving at us in the rearview guys #they’re saying so long suckers bet you miss us!#this one though is technically @depressingly-lonely’s fault #she said it took her 40 minutes to read my EP4 recap and I took that as a personal challenge to make this a SOLID HOUR of reading for her #evil laughter so I basically took 7500 words and said oh what’s 3k+ more? I hope you enjoy your bedtime reading friend #my stuff

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omegalomania · 9 months

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i haven't seen anyone post about this yet here but today a new comic series was announced that joe was a part of! it's called holy roller and issue #1 will be available november 22nd.

It's not every day that a publisher announces a new comic co-written by comedian Andy Samberg and Fall Out Boy's Joe Trohman. But that's what happened at Comic-Con, as Image Comics revealed the first details about Holy Roller. Billed as a cross between Kingpin, Inglourious Basterds and Batman, Holy Roller is a darkly comedic superhero series about a bowling ball-wielding vigilante. He'll have to bowl the perfect game when his hometown becomes overrun by Neo-Nazis. [...] “If you have ever found yourself wondering, ‘Why is there no comic book about a vigilante hero who smashes people's faces in with a bowling ball?’ you are in LUCK, bruv!" said Samberg. Trohman added: “This is an intensely personal book that will resonate with all. A hyper-stylized yarn, but informed by the bleak reality we’ve all come to know. It’s also your one-stop-shop for a bad-ass Jewish guy kicking, punching, and bowling-balling Neo-Nazis into oblivion!”

#fall out boy #joe trohman #holy roller #*making poasts #id in the alt text #i am once again reminding u all that joe trohman is the only band dude in comics i trust rn #this looks amazing and i genuinely cannot wait

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goth-pod · 3 months

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Episode 1 Repost!

Welcome to Goth-Pod! Join host Juda Boone discuss all things Gotham City. Today we dive head first into one of Gotham City's more relevant mysteries: Who is The Batman?

[goth-pod is a fictional in-universe podcast based on the DC comics universe. Juda Boone is an original fictional character, not based on any real person or known comic book character.]

Transcript under the cut

Hello everyone! Welcome to our first episode of the season. If you're new here, hi! Thank you so much for joining us here at Goth-Pod. Unfortunately we are not a gothic-lifestyle podcast, though I do understand the confusion.

Goth-Pod is a Gotham City based podcast for all discussions of Gotham. The weird and the wild, the rogues and the rakes, the heroes and the heretics.

You are listening today to your favorite non-binary holy heretic, Juda Boone. Yes that is my real name and yes I did pick it myself, thank you.

For the first episode of the season I wanted to start us off with something that has been a heavily discussed topic, and therefore something comfortable for our Gotham residents. The age old question, the thing that gets people more up in arms than the moon landing- Who is The Batman?

There's this idea that almost all people have, that heroes have to have a secret identity. Which is fair. We watched things like Cinderella, or the Mask of Zorro all our lives. The idea of changing the outward appearance in order to do something one normally couldn’t.

If you’re fighting for your life every night against some of the most dangerous people in the world, you don’t want those people to know your home address. So you don a mask, and a new persona and you do what one normally couldn't.

But the Bat, as most Gothamites know, does not follow the normal rules we see with other heroes. Less of a mask, and more of a.. casing. Not so much a persona, but instead a state of being.

The Bat is. Weird. That's why we love him. That's why he’s ours.

But what if that went further? What if Batman wasn’t much of a man at all? Batman, or, The Bat, as I like to call him, is more of a.. Manifestation of Gotham. Or of the justice Gotham needs? An earth-bound spirit that haunts just as strongly as it interferes.

You know I used to have a belief as a kid, that Monsters would just disappear when light touched them.

Strangely, I’m not alone in this weird meta-physical belief. I actually adopted it from a good friend here at Goth-Pod. Of course, I don’t speak for everyone at the podcast and definitely not for everyone in Gotham. My uncle still texts me blog posts that try to explain the crack-pot theory that Batman is in fact, world-renowned reporter, Vikki Vale.

But what do you think? Does the Bat have a face behind the ghostly white eyes and inhuman abilities to cling to the shadows?

Unrelated, but did you know that Gotham is one of the only cities that has an urban bat population? Something to think about tonight.

Thank you for joining! If you enjoy this podcast, let us know! We love to hear from our neighbors in Gotham, or if you're listening in from outside our home city. I’m Juda and you’re listening to Goth-Pod. Until next time, stay safe, Gotham.

#gotham #gotham city #batman #the batman #dc #dc comics #batman and robin #bruce wayne #gothamite #gothamite rp #dc universe #batman comics #dcu #gotham rp #episode 1 #repost

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sister-lucifer · 11 months

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what’s wrong with you based on your favorite batman villain

(don’t take these too seriously)

(sequel to this post)

The Riddler: Holy shit shut the fuck up for two seconds PLEASE. i know you have a touch of the tism and crave to derail every conversation to talk about your special interest but no one else is having fun. this is why you don’t have any friends. You also have a very niche and the second most expensive taste in clothing so you only have like 3 outfits to mix and match. You either dress like you’re going to the Met Gala or like a dad on vacation, no in between

The Penguin: STOP FUCKING IMPULSE BUYING!!! YOU HAVE TOO MANY TRINKETS!!! YOU DONT NEED IT JUST BECAUSE ITS PRETTY!!!! You have the most expensive taste in clothing, especially victorian undergarments, and spend an embarrassing amount of money to dress like a vampire. And stop being so hard on your body. It might not always be the perfect image of what you want, but it’s doing its best, even if you have to help it out a bit.

Harley Quinn: Sweetheart, I promise you are more than just your sex appeal. I know you grew up around misogyny and were raised to be a housewife but you’re free now!! Well…you would be if you stopped picking the shittiest men. A relationship does not define you, stop settling for assholes because you feel ashamed for being single. Have you tried dating a woman? No, seriously, try it. You deserve it

The Joker: Stop using your humor to deflect from your trauma, i bet your back hurts from carrying the weight of being the funniest person in your friend group. You’re a big time maximalist who spends an hour picking out a hundred accessories to wear and wind up being late because you couldn’t choose which kandi bracelets were best for the occasion. You’re still holding on to the last shreds of your teenage edgelord phase. Also clean your damn room and throw away those old drink cans, nasty ass

Catwoman: How does it feel to be the sexiest person in the room at any given time? Not good, I bet, since you struggle to make friends because of how often they wind up to only be after your body. Sorry you can’t catch a break. You’re probably still carrying money saving habits you got from your parents when you were a kid even though you don’t need to now. Also please try wearing a color besides black, it’s almost summer, you’re gonna die of heatstroke. Nice eyeliner though

Poison Ivy: Dude, so many people are crushing on you rn, how do you not see this?! You’re so hot but soooo emotionally unavailable, christ. A boy in middle school said something uncomfortable to you once which was then reinforced by the misogynistic micro aggressions you were subject to as a teenager and it’s kinda tainted your entire view of the male gender, which is fair but also kinda sucks.

The Scarecrow: Daddy issues, daddy issues everywhere. He was scary as fuck, wasn’t he? Your fear was valid. You really love to analyze people which wouldn’t be an issue if you could actually be subtle about it. Stop staring, you creep. Also, that flannel doesn’t look as good as you think it does, you look like a depressed lumberjack. Like please just buy a cardigan. Halloween is your favorite holiday and you get really annoying about it around mid august. And remember to brush your fuckin hair for gods sake

The Mad Hatter: You get like…reeeeaaaally weird about your crushes, man. Like whatever you’re doing it’s not normal. You can just talk to them, you know. You have the weirdest sexual interests but they’re more so hyper specific and niche than gross or unsettling. That’s better, I guess? You gotta leave your headspace and live in reality for a bit, man. I know it kinda sucks, but there are real people here! Also you’re short. Gross

#batman #batman rogues #the riddler #edward nygma #the penguin #oswald cobblepot #harley quinn #harleen quinzel #the joker #the scarecrow #jonathan crane #mad hatter #jervis tetch #poison ivy #pamela isley #catwoman #selina kyle

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shannankle · 11 days

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No Entry: Voyeurism and Reality in the DFF Finale

Wow I’m getting to this so late cause life got in the way, but I’m back on the DFF meta train for a short bit more!

I wanted to look at the finale through the lens of voyeurism and gaze. I’ve written already about how DFF draws on found footage traditions here and about different levels of voyeurism the show employs during sex scenes here. I’ll definitely be drawing on both of these posts and picking up some threads, but hopefully it doesn't feel like a requirement to go read them. One thing I’ll be mentioning frequently here is levels of voyeurism, so I want to lay them out again:

The typical gaze of the camera. Here there's no obvious signals or framing of voyeurism apart from the natural voyeurism inherent in filming and watching any piece of visual media.

We know a character is being watched but we don't see the watcher doing this. Perhaps a character expresses feeling watched or thinks they saw something. At this level we may stay in the perspective of the character being watched or an outside perspective where the watcher remains off screen.

The gaze is mediated in a way that evokes watching. For example, through a camera, a window, or the first-person viewpoint of the killer (common in horror). The voyeurism becomes more obvious and experiential. We're implicated more explicitly in the gaze but not necessarily in a way that forces the audience to reflect on this fact.

We see someone else gazing in a mediated way. Hannah Bonner puts it best in a chapter she wrote about Cabin in the Woods and other films with surveillance: "The voyeur is no longer just the audience, squirming in their seats from Michael Meyers's point of view as he tracks down his naked sister and her boyfriend in Halloween...now the audience as voyeur watches the voyeurs watch the surveyed" (90). This gets meta on the viewer.

0. This is when we don’t even get to see what happened. There isn’t any gaze because what occurs happens off screen and is only mentioned or hinted at. This comes up for example when Non and Phi are implied to have had (but not shown to have had) sex.

There are a number of ways that the finale of DFF plays with gaze and voyeurism that are really interesting to me, so let’s jump in!

Jin’s Hallucination (aka Holy Level-5 Voyeurism Batman!)

It makes sense to start here, since Jin’s sequence centers around sex and voyeurism in pretty obvious ways. In my previous post, I noted that Non and Keng’s scene is one of the only moments where we move into level 4 voyeurism. We watch Jin filming Non and Keng and the show starts to ask us to reflect on surveillance and our perceptions of sexuality and SA. Jin’s other sex scene with Phi stays steadily at level 3 in the way it’s shot, though we get a lingering view of the dog/astronaut that almost seems to threaten level-4 voyeurism but doesn’t quite get there. The camera’s gaze turns on Jin in a way that reflects his guilt and foreshadows his hallucination in the finale.

As we enter Jin’s sequence, the dial is immediately set at level 4. We watch Jin viewing himself being surveilled. In an interesting turn Jin is both a voyeur and the surveyed. It’s a moment that parallels the early scene in episode 1 where Tee stops the group from viewing him and White via the surveillance cameras. But, as I'll note further in, Jin can't make it stop.

The show flashes between the scenes in the TVs, moving us down a level or two as we enter the scenes playing in the screens, and images of students with their phones recording, moving us back up to level 4 territory.

Jin then enters the bathroom, seeing himself having oral sex. Sex Jin makes eye contact, putting us at level 3 voyeurism as we take on voyeur Jin’s perspective (what is often the gaze in horror of the killer, but here the thing chasing him is his own guilt and his own self whose gaze he returns).

And then the show amps things up. So far we’ve oscillated between level 3 and 4, but then students file into the bathroom with their phones and we get an entirely new level of voyeurism: level 5! The audience (us) watches Jin watch people who are filming (using a mediated gaze) and watching hallucination Jin have sex. Jin’s double presence in the scene allows for a whole new level of voyeurism in the show.

*side note: Copper watched this in a theater with fans. So we have Copper watching the theater audience watch him as Jin watching people using cameras to watch hallucination Jin have sex.

We get flashes of the filmers (level 4), the sex (level 3), flashbacks of what Jin did (level 4), and Jin watching all this in horror (level 5). The changing levels keep the sequence frenetic and intense, both visually and thematically. And of course, the show smartly has held off on level 5 until the finale/climax of the show. From an overall structural perspective it’s a very smart way to build the show’s tension. Our first four episodes stay lower, spiking to level 3 but largely staying at lower levels. In the flashbacks our ceiling is raised to 4, but we also get a new floor with the 0 of Non and Phi, and the show moves around through levels 0-4. Then suddenly in the finale our ceiling is moved even higher again for the most intensity and impact possible.

It reminds me a lot of dynamics in music. The early verses are soft and grow to the first chorus, the next verse goes much quieter to contrast with a louder second chorus, a bridge comes in, and then the final two choruses hit big. You don’t want every moment to be at the max or you won’t have anywhere to build to. DFF holds off on level 5 so that it can go big in the finale in a similar way.

I think this sequence is also interesting in how it frames Jin as both voyeur and surveyed in Hanna Bonner’s formulation. Jin takes the role that we the audience typically would in level-4 voyeurism. I wrote a bit in my previous post about how level 4 gets meta and asks us viewers to reflect. Here, Jin takes that role instead, and it forces him to face his guilt and fear in a self-reflexive way.

This isn’t to say that this is a freeing process or one of heroic self-growth, but it is one of awareness filled with the pain of encountering guilt. As he stabs himself, Jin apologizes but also says “I’m guilty. I know it now.” This knowing suggests that this has come from Jin being painfully self-aware.

Placing Jin in what would typically be the audience's role (voyeur) also allows him to act in a way that we cannot. We see him try to pull Keng off of him, try to stop the filmers, and then smashing the TVs. It embodies an impulse we may have had as viewers in other moments of the show, especially as we watch Non being hurt over and over--a desire to step in, to stop it all. But we can’t. No matter what level of voyeurism we’re offered, we can’t cross the fourth wall in that way, and so the show keeps going on; things spiral forward, a painful piling up of cause-and-effect, and we watch the dominoes falling.

Jin is placed here in a unique position as both viewer and surveilled. He can, in theory, cross the fourth wall to intervene and stop this. But that just makes his lack of control all the more horrific. It mirrors the way the video of Non and Keng circulating took away Non's agency and control over how the world perceived him.

Jin can’t stop the sex, the people filming don’t even acknowledge him, and there’s no button or remote control that can turn off the TVs. The TVs Jin smashes only show what has already been filmed. Jin tries to smash the TVs and some turn to static, as if he can force his way out of seeing this, force the scene itself out of level-4 voyeurism, denying himself and us viewers the gaze.

But unlike the local storage of a phone, the TV screens aren’t the source of the recording data. It parallels the moment that Jin short circuits his computer, while the video he recorded uploads to the internet. The footage is already circulating; no short circuiting of computers, smashing of TVs, or guilt will stop the damage.

The only way to stop it all is to go back in time, and stop the footage from being recorded to begin with. So Jin apologizes as he stabs his hand--a hand used to hold a phone or a camera, a hand that can record.

Fluke's Hallucination: Voyeur/Bystander

If we’re talking about gazing and voyeurism, it also makes a lot of sense to think about Fluke, our bystander. Even till the end he equates inaction with a lack of culpability. As we enter his hallucination he says, “It wasn’t me. I didn’t do it.” But other voices show his fear: that the world will not believe him, that he will be blamed regardless of his own perceived lack of involvement.

However, Non steps in to set Fluke straight. When Fluke tells Non he wasn’t responsible for the sex tape, that it was all Jin, Non replies: “But you didn’t stop him. It’s like killing me alive.” Here, DFF quite clearly criticizes bystanderism and the assumption that it equates to a lack of involvement, responsibility, or guilt.

Non tells Fluke to film Non and Keng and forces Fluke to take the camera. Of course, in the real world, the camera he’s guiltily raising to his face is actually a pair of needles that will blind him. He refuses to act on the harm he sees, so the solution is to not have him be able to see at all. Then he can’t have the future he has tried so hard to protect at Non’s expense.

Interestingly, hallucination Non forces Fluke to take up the camera and move into level-4 voyeurism. He’s forced to look at what he metaphorically turned a blind eye to. Perhaps because the consequences of him filming would be the same as when he let himself pretend his own gaze was value neutral. By forcing Fluke up to level 4, the audience is also drawn in again in a meta way to reflect on not just Fluke's role as a bystander but perhaps our own as well. In a show framed by voyeurism, a show that deconstructs easy binaries of guilty and innocent, what is our own culpability as an audience?

This moment also has a striking similarity to the film Shutter, which I mentioned in my found footage and tech post. I talked about how Shutter touches on themes of bystanderism and guilt, mostly linking this to Jin. But the parallel is made here as well with Fluke as he is positioned to do what Jin did and what Tun did in Shutter: film/photograph SA. Notice how Tun, despite taking the photo, turns his gaze away from what is happening as if he can remain uninvolved, much like Fluke does throughout DFF. Fluke struggles and looks away from the camera Non forces on him, but ultimately we know he can't keep turning his head away. He looks at the very moment he blinds himself.

On a side note, part of the modern version of the Hippocratic oath states the following: "that warmth, sympathy, and understanding may outweigh the surgeon's knife or the chemist's drug." Fluke lacked this sympathy or understanding and in the end it was a doctor's tools that punished him, the needles used to stitch patients and the chemist's drug that New releases. Maybe I'll do a whole breakdown of the oath and Fluke, we'll see.

The Viewer and Reality

Earlier I asked the following: In a show framed by voyeurism, a show that deconstructs easy binaries of guilty and innocent, what is our own culpability as an audience? I want to unpack that a bit here by exploring how the show's finale situates us as an audience and plays with our perception and gaze.

I've mentioned how level-4 voyeurism takes things to a meta level, asking us viewers to reflect on our own judgements, perceptions, and assumptions. This is often centered around sexuality and morality via the sex tape and Jin's hallucination. However, this theme goes beyond sex, as we see the various ways almost every character operates with limited assumptions of who Non is. They all think they see him correctly, but this limited perspective is deconstructed, at least for the audience, as we increasingly see more of Non's life and the consequences of everything play out.

As I put it in my previous post: "The show clearly has a lot to say about what it means to surveil others and about the ways our perceptions can do others harm". There's a particular violence in watching and in placing narratives on people. I'd argue that even in the finale, DFF remains aware of and willing to critique (or at least play with) the narratives and assumptions we as an audience try to place on the show more broadly.

The Final Shot

I've already talked a lot about how the final episode plays with levels of voyeurism, even giving us a level 5. What I find particularly fascinating is how these levels are paired with some of the shows most graphic violence. We see so much of these character's physical and psychological pain in the finale.

But when all is said and done, what we close on is a level 0.

This move is actually pretty similar to The Blair Witch Project, which I wrote about in my found footage post. One thing horror scholar Heller-Nicholas notes is how the camera in found footage films is in tension with the audience's desire to look at what we want to see. There's a frequent and deliberate denial of full visual access that often adds to the horror. DFF isn't found footage, but it does make similar moves through framing choices that gesture towards the camera's limited and narrowed scope.

Such shots box the characters in and imitate camera framing and a mediated gaze.

The ending shot of the show doesn't implement such obvious squared framing, but it relies on us being visually cut off nonetheless. We're pulled out, past the gate, so only a small bit of the house remains visible. What we want to see as an audience is inside, in tension with what the camera can and will show us.

While not identical in aesthetics, the principle remains the same as found footage. At the end of TBWP, the camera drops, we're left looking at a blurry image of the floor, while the fate of the characters remains entirely unknown. Our visual gaze and our narrative insight are denied. All that remains is the sound of the camera rolling, just as all we hear is the sound of a lighter as we end DFF.

In the end, when the credits roll on DFF, we don't know if anyone left the house or even what was a hallucination or reality. What we just watched voyeuristically is all called into question, and we are shut out. Whatever did or will happen in the house, we won't be the one's to see it; our gaze is denied as are our attempts to place any sort of definitive interpretation on the narrative.

Throughout the story we have moments where the line between private and public is horrifically crossed often through the use of cameras, but in this final moment the private is reinforced again. The line is redrawn, emphasized with the "No Entry" sign outside the gate which marks the house as a private space that we no longer have the privilege of entering. The door is both literally and metaphorically closed.

*Side note: I think there's a whole other post worth of discussion here on the harm caused when our priorities of what should be private vs public get warped and collectivity fails. But in a sense, perhaps the audience too is caught up in this failure, as bystanders who failed to intervene, and we are left only with the horror of unknown fates hidden behind a marker of private property.

Our Myths and Reality

This closure is also really interesting in a show that centers a struggle over authorship and directorial control. The tension between Por and Non plays out class and power dynamics and raises questions about who gets to tell what stories and what/who gets made invisible. So what can we make of an ending that renders everything and everyone invisible? When there's no director left to present their visual or narrative interpretation of reality?

We're left instead completely unmoored from any sense of what the show's reality is or was. And I think this is an interesting play on and subversion of the type of reality fiction offers us.

Once again, in her work on found footage Heller-Nicholas notes how the genre has come to rely not on "...our gullibility, but rather our willingness to succumb to the myth of the real that these films offer..." (26). I mention in my found footage post how DFF gives us many examples of characters and society falling into their own myths of reality and placing these on others (such as Non) to harmful results. And it's quite telling that the true found footage film (the sex tape) is taken as more of a window into reality than the found footage horror film the boys produce. People on social media interpret the tape of Non as a reflection of reality, but what they express are the myths and narratives they hold about sex and morality, rather than an objective truth.

As an audience viewing a narrative, we also bring our myths, biases, and narrative desires to DFF itself. And in the end the show makes an interesting move in how it chooses to end the show while subverting these impulses.

First it offers us a possible ending. One where things return to "normal," where the heroic romantic couple are together in proper BL fashion, where they survive but live with the trauma. Phi even becomes a director, making sure that role isn't left empty. Tee's ending is very similar to Tun's in Shutter, where a mental breakdown is seen as apt punishment for guilt. The idea of the final girl carrying on the trauma of the slasher is a trope in itself. These all perhaps play on assumptions we have of how such narratives should go, our very own myths of reality as it should play out in fiction.

Then DFF pulls the rug on this myth and any sense of verisimilitude. We have no sense of what the show's "reality" is by the end, and no comfy myth of the real for us to return to. We're left asking "what really happened?" while the show says "what is real?" Because the camera is far from a reliable, objective tool to see the world.

While I think there were some issues with pacing in the finale, I still think this is a really cool move. It fits so well in a show about the harms of the fictions we place on reality and real people. And to turn that critique up to a meta level that messes with the audience? I love it!

I also think it's especially powerful and tragic that, in the end, it is only in a space where there is no "reality" or solid narrative of what happened that Non can be present. He was harmed so much by the weight of others' narratives, rendered invisible. But his presence is unrelenting in the finale, driving the hallucinations and breaking through the more clean cut ending mythic ending. It's in this liminal space, where the real falls apart that he can haunt and be visible.

And perhaps in a story where Non's privacy was violated, where he was subject to the perceptions of others in cruel ways, the best kindness the show can offer its characters is a final, horrific moment of privacy, where not even the audience can perceive them.

Sources:

Heller-Nicholas, Alexandra. Found Footage Horror Films: Fear and the Appearance of Reality. McFarland & Company, 2014.

Bonner, Hannah. “#Selfveillance: Horror’s Slut Shaming through Social Media, Sur- and Selfveillance.” Gender and Contemporary Horror in Film, edited by Samantha Holland et al., Emerald Publishing, 2019, pp. 85–99.

Shutter (film, 2004)

The Blair Witch Project (film, 1999)

#another one that makes sense in my head and I'm hoping makes some sense on paper #dff the series #dead friend forever #dff meta #dead friend forever meta #my posts #my meta

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crow-n-tell · 1 year

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Holy sea cow, Batman! That is so cool! You said you didn't have room for your Monty notes in the post but, do you still want to talk about them? Monty looks so awesome! You drew that fight scene so well!

Theidhdbsensis thank you! And to your question… maybe.. m… maybe

Okay only a lil n then I need to sleep cause I’ve been pulling a couple all nighters.

There isn’t much to stay about him, other than i based him off stalkers for a couple select reasons.

The color scheme (green, purple, lil bit of pink/red), the whole stalkers looking vaguely like gators, perhaps a BIT of laying some plot groundwork but don’tevenworryaboutthat, and stalkers in subnautica are somewhat friendly. On the basis you give them food they might like you awhile, if you hand over some metal you got on hand they leave you alone. Without a lil give from your side, stalkers are all take which isn’t nessarily gator like (cause like… gators. Gators will just eat you. Sharks are like okay? This is weird? New? I’m gonna put it in my face to understand it. GATORS? Nah. They look at you and they do not care if you might be as brittle and chalky as candy cigarettes, they WILL ASSUME YOU ARE FOOD)

I love Monty being a secret softy, so stalkers fit that personality to a t. Him being a lil more sentient than the average stalker means he’s probably gonna be rough and tumble for a while but then he’s gonna be your buddy with that whole excuse of “as long as your feeding me etc etc” so tsundere

There isn’t much to report otherwise on him, for now….. hmmmm OH BUT.

I did include him dropping a tooth when he was spitting out the seaglide! For people who don’t know, stalkers often lose teeth when they end up chomping metal - it’s a small detail but I thought it was fun :D

#my art #ask #mermaid au #stalker!Monty #tiding over

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dyslexicandakeyboard · 15 days

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Sorry - to correct. The place where Talia Al Ghul threatens to kill Huntress Helena Bertinelli out of jealousy that she might be Batman’s new “concubine” in the 90s Batman Legacy Event is in the issue Robin (1993) #33 and this was way way before Morrison and definitely way before 9/11. She was just not purely good person and was prone to these antics in her own ways (upset over Bruce not answering that they belonged together over Selina and threatening to rip their heart out if they got together at the end of Tec #526, for example) and I think it was really the Demon Trilogy (which O’ Neil who created her himself didn’t like and editorial wanted taken out because they didn’t approve and saw it as an out of wedlock romance), B:TAS nostalgia, and that era’s editorial (run by O’ Neil again) keeping Batman from his other significant romances that helped her a bit. Even when you go read the write ins for her classic stories she was never as popular as say, Selina (and you can tell from the Lazarus Affair Arc)

Yep, a lot of it is rose-colored glasses and nostalgia that has lead to this laughable brain-rot.

Many Talia Stans seem to think that Talia is Bruce's endgame (Which is not only stupid but a disservice to both their characters) and try to harken back to the good ol' days (Which weren't all that good) where Talia was this "heroic anti-heroine", which isn't really true, perfect for Bruce to prove their point. The Demon Trilogy, despite being non-canonical since it's conception, is taken as gospel in their circle and spurs them on. They also like to yap about how Talia is based off a Bond Girl, which in their eyes makes her Bruce's wife despite Bruce being a separate character from James Bond and that the character they say she's based off of dies.

Plus, most of their complaining that Morrison wrote a racist and sexist version of Talia usually fall short with this information (i.e all of the arcs she's been in where she's done bad and questionable things). This isn't to say that DC hasn't been racist or sexist (Batman Legends of the Dark Night first few issues, Holy Terror or any of their earlier works are examples) or that all Talia's depictions have always been free of any bigotry. But most of them use these accusations to stop any conversation that invalidates their version of Talia. Also, I've spoken about racism and sexism within fandoms (DC, Voltron, The Bear) in irl plus I'm literally mixed, so I'm not trying to invalidate anyone.

It's also weird how this attitude has flowed into the wider fandom and causes people to have this strange vision of Talia because if we look at this relationship without these blinders (nostalgia) still portraying Brutalia as a romantic relationship is just down right creepy and borderline abusive. Like in many of their interactions post O'Neil (And even under his editorial), Talia is honestly a down-right over-possessive, manipulative person with abusive tendencies and Bruce enables her. It's stifling because you can't treat it as anything other than romantic and healthy.

Plus, Talia's fans end up being more sexist as they take away Talia's agency when confronted with her bad actions and treat her like a child.

The panels mentioned.

Plus more panels of Talia being unlikable/abusive

#ask #answer #anti talia al ghul

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butcherlarry · 8 months

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Weekly Fic Recs 29

I can't believe I've done 29 of these so far! Holy moly!

I'm going to be traveling next week, and I'm not sure if I'll be able to post my fic rec list next Sunday. If I don't, expect an extra long one the following week ;)

On to the recs!

come morning light by TheResurrectionist - Bruce & Clark friendship, Clois, complete. A lovely short fic about Clark getting married and Bruce calming him down from wedding jitters.

Dr. Wayne AU series by Sohotthateveryonedied - Batfam, series incomplete but the fics are :D AU where Bruce becomes a doctor and acquires his kids through doctoring.

what price glory by TheResurrectionist - Batfam, complete. Bruce gets drugged by a strong batch of Poison Ivy's pheromones and the kids decide to ask him some personal questions. Many regrets are had by all. heeheehee!

Growing Pains by Janie__loops - Batfam, complete. No powers AU where Bruce adopts Dick when he's two.

More Things in Heaven and Hell by JustGettingBy - Superbat, wip. More of the X-files fusion fic!!

Patchwork Pod by Ktkat9 - Superbat, wip. More of the mer Bruce fic! Mer Tim is getting to know his new family more! It's super cute!

Simple Ideations And The Consequences That Come With by Nonsensicalwitheringrambles - Batman, complete. Tim joins the family early AU! Also, instead of Tim finding out Batman is Bruce, he thinks they are dating instead :) :) :)

Nominal by Unpretty - Batman centric, complete. Bruce has spreadsheets about why he is sad :( He also has spreadsheets about why he's happy too! A fun (and funny!) read :D

speaking through shadows plain by nickelthecoin - Batfam, Superbat (if you squint), complete. Batman gets hit with a truth spell and talks about how much he loves his children to the JL. It's super adorable!

F*ck, Marry, Kill...Bruce Wayne? by Ortholeine - Batman, complete. Inspired by that one thread on Tumblr. The JL plays fuck, marry, kill as a team bonding activity. Bruce Wayne is eventually thrown into the mix. Shenanigans ensue.

Why Bruce shouldn't try to drink in pace with superhumans by SolaceInSpace - Batfam, complete. Batman gets a bit drunk while team bonding with the JL. Shenanigans ensue.

Just A Little Bit... by HaleHathNoFury (My_Trex_has_fleas) - Superbat, wip. Hale. Hale. HALE. YOU ARE KILLING ME. I AM CLUCHING MY PHONE AND SHAKING IT. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Some excellent updates of this fic. Some more villians enter the scene. Bruce gets creepier and Clark gets more alien as a result. I am LIVING.

#weekly fic recs #fic recs #fanfic recs #fanfiction reccomendations #superbat #batman #bruce wayne #superman #clark kent #batfam #batfamily #bat family

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daisychains111 · 3 months

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incorrect chb camper quotes but it's actually just my sister's quotebook from Twitter

Disclaimer: This post is gonna be LONG AF

Percy: "Ahh, die quieter"

Clarisse to Silena: "Do I look majestic?"

Will: "I live in America. Cultures?... casserole"

Nico: "At-home lobotomy"

Baby Nico to Clarisse: "You look like Harry Potter, You just need a scar black hair, different clothes, and to be a boy. "

Annabeth:"I don't know if I have enough sanity for 2 Holy books"

Leo: "I've seen titties before....not really in person, but yk"

Annabeth: "Do you have ears?"

Jason: "I kinda wanna work at Taco Bell"

Piper: "I've never been passive-aggressive in my life"

Will to Apollo: "There's no batteries in my butt Dad I'm not a robot"

Clarisse: "I'm not upset I don't hold grudges"

Ares to Clarisse: "I don't like your clothes it forces me to look at you"

Frank to Leo: "It's not 'drip' it's stupid"

Travis to the whole Hermes Cabin: "I'm the Rizzington bear... like Paddington bear but Rizz" (after his 1st date with Katie)

Nico: "I love Olive Garden, I wish Italians were real"

Rachel: "Come on, you guys stop trying to cockblock the view"

Katie: "If people can smoke weed in the middle of the day, then I can drink chamomile tea"

Rachel: "You don't want to piss me off I'm witewally a werewolf"

Piper about Jason: "All my friends are boys, and one just died... he would have made a great bridesmaid"

Frank: "I was doing a silly but the funny didn’t land"

Jason: "Why am I white"

Rachel: "I am not a whore, I am a celibate queen!"

Drew: "It's not the fashion statement that you think it is"

Nico about the Ares Cabin: "They're gonna call you a slur, but they're gonna be really nice about it"

Piper to Annabeth: "If we both think it, it's not bitchy"

Grover: "I'm just gonna write a paragraph or two about global warming"

Annabeth"I have like a 7th-grade reading level!!! (this is impressive when you're dyslexic)

Jason: "Dude I love yoga"

Will: "They say that Utah is the promise land"

Kayla: *explains what a text-fic is to grandparents (Apollo)*

Clarisse: "Put that on your Twitter!" *points knife at me*

Travis: "Do you eat?"

Katie: "...um yes?"

Travis: "Oh, I mean do you want to eat." (when he asked Katie out the first time)

Hazel: "That's not gonna change my heart. That's just gonna make me cry!"

Alabaster: "I wanna find someone somewhere to impregnate and then steal the baby......Where's your Twitter, that was kinda funny"

Percy about Leo: "I would spoon that man so hard"

Frank: "The closer I get to nature, the closer I get to being a werewolf"

Apollo: "I feel like Jaba the Hut"

Rachel: "It's because you ate girl dinner"

Apollo (same convo^)"I fell asleep, and I woke up, and I ate a girl dinner, and I didn't feel that good"

Percy: Don't mind me just cleaning the ocean" *hand angrily on hip*

Will to the Stolls: "Although my bellybutton was once my mouth I don't want soda in it!!"

Connor: "Look at how majestic I am"

Clarisse: *gasps* *throws uno cards* "This is communism at its finest, and I hate your life." *Is losing* "All I'm doing is humoring you now. There is no reason for me to play anymore." *throws cards* *again*

Nico: *passes out*

Will: "We need to take you to the doctor like right now."

Nico: "No fireworks are more important than my health"

Leo about Percy: "That's a pretty boy right there... if we were in prison, it's over."

Kayla when Will came out to her: "Slay motherfucker"

Annabeth: "I hope to not run over any old ladies...old men are fair game tho."

Percy: "Main characters get bullied, Jesus....yep!"

Leo: "What if I was an astronaut!!!!"

Travis: "Banana, Banana, Meatball"

Clarisse: "I am going to break your toe shut the hell up"

Katie to Connor: "I hope you get bullied in high school."

Clarisse about Leo: "This guy's a fuckin goober"

Clarisse: "What did you do to your sweatshirt? Did you get hungry?"-Grover: *sighs*

Nyssa (Hephaestus kid) to Leo: "Dont hurt me. I'm Batman!.... You better not tweet that"

Kayla to Apollo: "It's called multi-tasking Apollo! "

Apollo: "It's mother to you"

Clarisse: "I could fight God and win"

Percy: "So you wanna fight rn"

Clarisse: "No, I'm good"

Jason; "You look gang"

Leo: "What? I look gay!?!?!"

Jason: "You look straight, but nice"

Leo: "Oh... thanks!"

Apollo to Rachel"Lie, deny, cry, and for good measure be a raging slut."

Silena: "There's all kinds of nature out here"

Katie: "Live, laugh, love, low iron"

Annabeth to Piper: "Keep backing up...Cuz you have a fear of commitment

Lou Ellen to Katie: "Does your knee affect your shoe size... or are your feet just that small??"

Travis: "The amount of testosterone in me, peanuts are allergic to me!"

Leo: "I'm cracked up on feeling sexy"

Connor to the whole Hermes Cabin: "The "10" of us? our parents sp*rm pets"

Apollo about Athena: "OH gods, a single mom"

Apollo about Kayla's dad: "I cheated on myself with a man"

Malcolm about Athena: "She's a mom boogie woogie woogie"

Nico: "I cried at Chick-fil-A the other day"

Nico: "Live, laugh, lobotomy."

Drew about Thalia: "She has no friends and a dead brother."

Katie: "I wrote fanfiction on my i-pod touch"

Lacy to Leo: "Was it a tech? or was it a human?"

Will: "Live, laugh, love, tampons"

Kayla: "Die, cry, hate, condoms"

Aphrodite to Clarisse: "Do you like being a girl? You just always wear pants"

Percy: "Chill I know how to make conversations I have Rizz"

Will: "What! no! cow!"

Frank: "Fvcking knock it off seriously you guys are acting like children!!"

Travis to Lou Ellen: "Yesss pussy-pop you slayed"

Ashlyn (Hermes kid): "Chick-fil-A is mid, Taco bell is where it's at"

Percy during tlt: "You couldn't even buy a gumball with that shit (drachmas)"

Percy (same convo ^): "A quarter? You could buy a gumball with that shit"

Nico: "Your soul and your money!"

Tyson: "You've seen fishes, fishes move fast"

Leo to Frank: "What the fvck is a kilometer"

Leo making fun of Frank: "Mua ha ha ha I'm Canadian"

Percy: "Jesus didn't give up his life he gave up his weekend"

*as seen at 2am in the Apollo Cabin*

Gracie: "You're discriminating against me"

April (the token straight): "It's cuz she's gay"

Will: "We're all gay."

Nico: You don't have any slurs about you."

Leo: "No because I'm perfect"

this was fun to make lol....there will probably be a part 2 but like far in the future. if you made it this far I love you....also if you don't recognize names it's bc I deep-dived Wiki to find canon names for each cabin.

If y'all want one-shots based on these TELL ME I NEED STUFF TO WRITE ABOUT

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thisisapaige · 6 days

Text

Tagged by @mercurialkitty. Thanks! This was fun :-)

20 Questions for Writers

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 59

2. What's your total AO3 word count? 645,479

3. What fandoms do you write for? Just Supernatural. I have the brainworms and they are in the shape of Thee One and Only Castiel.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

stay, In Just Saying It, Non Solum, Still Waters Run Deep, Sleeping Together

5. Do you respond to comments? Most of them. I do get kind of overwhelmed (with love and joy) if someone comments on all the chapters as they read, so I'll often reply to their final comment. And if the comments are rude, I ignore them (doesn't happen often, but it has).

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Thee fic that started it all: Empty Spaces. A bold choice for my first posting, lol. At least I wrote a sequel? :-P

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Probably Something Blue. I wrapped that up with a bow. As a commenter wrote, "Holy happy ending, Batman!!!!!"

8. Do you get hate on fics? Mmmmm, not sure I'd call it hate but I did have a commenter who wasn't happy with the direction The Angel went in. Thankfully, they figured out the fic wasn't to their tastes and decided to leave halfway through.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? Yeah. It's fun to write but, whew, very difficult to edit, lol. As for what kind... somewhat-idealized- romantic-everyone-has-a-good-time-and-feels-their-feelings kind of smut, I think. Most of the time... Murder the World was a lot more angsty.

10. Do you write crossovers? Nah. I don't really have the fic bug for other fandoms.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not that I'm aware of.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Yup! A couple in Russian and one in Chinese.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? No. I don't know if I'd be able to. I don't think I'd be a very good partner :-P. I don't even like a beta to look at my stuff 'till the draft is done and I read it though a couple times.

14. What’s your all time favorite ship? It's the DeanCas of it all.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? The Path of the Righteous Man (my reverse verse fic) is like, my white whale. I keep going back to it and never adding a single word. The block is strong on that one.

16. What are your writing strengths? Introspection and action. Both are sooooo fun.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? Dialogue. UGH. Dialogue. How do people talk? Hell if I know.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? Sure. My monolingual ass won't, though.

19. First fandom you wrote for? Posted? SPN. Written on loose leaf paper as a tiny child, which has been lost to the ages (thank goodness)? Final Fantasy VII.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written? This is a mean, mean question. I cannot chose one! I cannot! So have a selection (answer subject to change in 30 seconds):

stay for being my fix it that allowed me to continue enjoying the show after that fiasco of an ending.

The Angel for being the fantasy epic I always wanted to write.

insi(de an)d outside for being some of my strongest writing.

Still Waters Run Deep for being my first bang and also because I have prints of the art reafre made and that still blows my mind.

Something Blue because it took me on a very personal journey (and also I just posted it so it's fresh in my mind).

I *could* probably post most of my fic, honesty. I like my stuff. I wrote them for me, after all.

Tagging: @angelcasendgame @hornystiel @wormstacheangel @bloodydeanwinchester if you so chose to participate!

#tag game #destiel #long post #i can and will take any opportunity to talk about my writing. i like talking about my writing :-)

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reasonsforhope · 4 months

Text

Crowdsourcing a question

Okay totally personal post here because, now that search engines suck, my research is failing me. So I'm crowdsourcing my question about the residential care work industry!

Hoping at least some of my followers have experience in/with the industry and some intel on this:

Actual question: How common is it for jobs in residential care work (residential centers, btw, not home care) to actually have two people on the night shift? vs. just saying they always have two people on the night shift in interviews and their official policies, and actually it's not true?

Because my current job was, it turns out, apparently totally lying about "you'll never be on shift alone with clients" at orientation (when it comes to the night shift, anyway). Which, holy fucking safety issues, Batman!

Suffice to say this was a very fun thing to find out like three days before my first regular shift

So, I'm thinking realllll hard about switching companies, and I'm trying to figure out if I could expect to actually have a coworker at a different company, or if it's like an open secret in the field that actually, basically all the night shifts end up being solo shifts, because the industry is so chronically understaffed or w/e

#not news #ask #me #ideally only answer if you actually have specific knowledge of or experience with the industry #technically I'm working with disabled clients but also open to other sectors of residential care work if I do get another job #so if it's something that differs by sector please do let me know!#thanks so much #safety issues are for both me and the clients btw #this is not like “I'm afraid of the clients” in any way #it's about the fact that if something happened and I got hurt #I am the only staff in that whole house until morning #and there is MAYYYYYYYBE one client who is actually physically capable of calling for help #if I can't for whatever reason #also!!! this is an incredibly vulnerable client population with horrifyingly high abuse statistics!!#they should not be leaving someone they literally just hired completely alone with the clients every night for eight hours???#not gonna give more details for many obvious reasons #but like. just. no. don't do that. no.#in any residential care work facility imho but ESPECIALLY in this type of facility #also like if a client has a medical emergency #you're really gonna want both someone who can render aid AND someone who can call 911 and the on-calls and such #and yes the chaos and “surprises” around this job and scheduling is why I haven't been doing original posts lately #so answering also helps me get back to doing that sooner!

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