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#high school humor
heckin-good-memes · 2 years
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student-corner · 2 years
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day: i don’t update anymore but holy shit
someone flashed someone else (consensually) to win a theater game in my theater class
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jonquilandlace · 1 year
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A Tale of Two Cities got brought up again time to revive my favorite fact that when my high school class read it we referred to Madame Defarge's knitting holding people's names to kill as The Knit List
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lisashines · 1 year
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instagram
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derpymidnight · 1 year
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trust issues so bad i cant lock my chrysler pacifica without freaking the f out
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thiswitchyweirdo · 1 year
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YOU took agricultural to learn animal science. I took it to learn to grow cannabis. We are NOT the same.
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lenny-link · 7 months
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updog
(based on that one long thread on tumblr but i cannot find it for the life of me)
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birb-catto · 8 months
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CJG's reaction right before the soul-swapping thing:
CJG would be exasperated. Saying, GoD fking dammit KRS! I wrote so many things in detail so you'll survive in that world! (Granted he made the guidebook for CJS but still—!) And you napped before you finished it? You didn't know about the final boss? You're gonna get yourself killed!
Then he sees KRS as Cale vibin, powering through everything, smashing things left and right like a shounen protagonist.
CJG:
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CJS and LSH would chuckle, pat their senior's back and introduce him to their crazy punk of a dongsaeng. Maybe they have coffee while telling about their time in the company.
CJG will have an eye opening experience after that.
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mycatsaidwhat · 9 months
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things i’ve heard college students say pt. 29
-you may be into Sucky mpreg but some people believe the holocaust didn’t happen
-humans should have a mating season where we all congregate in a river once a year to find love like salmon 
-granted, there is a difference between being a momma’s boy and being Normon Bates 
-Only in a poli sci class would you get a picture of the live action winne the poo and Kim Jon un next to one another 
-“get ready for the met gala with me!!” influencer vlogs showing up on my suggested as if I don’t make $10.73 an hour 
-no way that dog had a blog, dogs can’t read 
-in god we bust
-every guys wants to be a golden retriever boyfriend until they wake up with no balls 
-graphic design majors are like the diet soda of the art world 
-if i could choose between having a successful career and lying down i would choose lying down 
-today’s graduation is sponsored by plan b
-going down on a woman and tying her fallopian tubes with my tongue like a cherry stem 
-most of the world’s problems would be solved if more billionaires disappeared in submarines 
-you come face to face with god at a 24 hour ihop
-she lemony on my snicket until there’s an unfortunate event
-took a shit in the gender neutral bathroom, call that a she/it
-the tornado dodged us cause someone told it that it had to pay a cover for every bar it destroyed
-can I have a cars 2-themed blowjob, please
-the best thing Taylor Swift has done recently is get some girls to consider that they may be the problem
-“I’M LITERALLY SO FERAL” no Ava you’re just drunk and white
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heckin-good-memes · 2 years
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single Christian ladies, let me be a warning. I didn't make a husband wishlist or pray for my future husband in high school, and look where it got me: alone, unloved, and perpetually single
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day: well it’s been fun
there’s a diesel leak from machinery next to the classroom i’m in and the school knows and is just like “won’t kill you! stay in class!”
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baileyash · 24 days
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They act like I don't have friends or a life 😭.
As someone who has a friend group of 50+ people, goes to multiple different after school sports and classes and literally has no time to myself, yes, I can very much confirm this is true 😭
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puppiesandnightlock · 2 months
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LINK: I Just Really Hate Your Face
summary: Top Student Damian Wayne is assigned to tutor his high school's resident Juvenile Delinquent, Jonathan Kent, who seems less interested in his work and more interested in his handsome tutor.
Damian is *not* having it.
aka the Bad Boy x Good Student Jondami AU no one really asked for but i delivered anyways
“I’m sorry, could you repeat that, sir?” Damian gritted out, unbelieving. 
Oblivious to the pain in his voice, the principal repeated what he had said just moments before in an overly-cheery tone.
“You are being assigned to tutor Jonathan Kent. Hopefully, you’ll be able to get his grades up by the end of this year, for both semesters. And perhaps you may be able to corral him into actually showing at his classes.”
Damian controlled the scowl beginning to show on his face. Jonathan Kent was the worst possible student he could have gotten. What would merely associating himself with a boy like that do to his spotless reputation? Surely, this would be placed on his record, and he didn’t see how tutoring the school’s resident juvenile delinquent would appeal him to universities.
And he was supposed to influence him? Gods above, help him.
“Sir. With all due respect, why is he even in this program? Certainly there are many other viable candidates…more respectable people that would benefit from my teaching.” he attempted to phrase this in a way that was not outright insulting.
“Damian, you are well aware, I'm sure, that you are this academy’s top student, and you’ve worked hard to get to this spot, unlike many other kids. I think that you can give Mr. Kent a push in the right direction, if not outright change him for the better. You signed up for this program, did you not?”
“I did, sir.” if not only for the nice view if would give his college admission.
“Then you will work with the student assigned to you. However, if there is no improvement, or you truly can’t manage him, you will have the option to switch, or drop the program completely. Is this more reasonable?”
Hm. It would have to do. “Yes, sir. Thank you sir.”
Let it be known that Damian Wayne was not a quitter, and stubborn enough to move a mountain with a single word if he so chose. Jonathan Kent would be a changed student by the end of the year, if he had his way.
Jon Kent rolled into school at approximately 12:37 on a saturday morning, already fifteen minutes late to his tutoring session. It was absolute hell for those forcing him to go to even make him get dressed, and he was prepared to stall as long as possible. Hell, if he was lucky, the tutor would be pretty and he could score himself a ticket outta there with a wink and a few well timed smiles. 
He entered the library, doing a quick once over, straightening his jacket and checking his eyeliner.
“Your studies are much more important than your appearance, Mr. Kent.” a voice drawled from behind him, and as he turned, a smirk came over his features.
Hello, Gorgeous.
The boy in front of him had delicately sharp features, striking green eyes framed by long lashes. His skin was a tantalizing carmel, clashing beautifully with the forest sleeves of his sweater. 
“If you could remove your jaw from the floor, we should begin.”
He had a mouth on him too. Perfect. 
“No name for me? Guess I'll just have to call you Beautiful.” Jon purred, the other boy’s face twisting in something that was definitely not a blush.
“It’s Damian. My name is Damian. We’re fifteen minutes behind already, if you could please take a seat.” 
Jon sidled up to his side as they walked towards the table with a sheaf of papers. 
“Damian, huh?” he tested the name out, rolling off his tongue pleasantly.
“Sounds familiar. Have we had a class together? I could swear we have chemistry .”
Damian looked torn between strangling Jon and strangling himself, settling only for a glare.
Jon was getting slightly annoyed. This guy was not taking the bait, and that was an excellent line for a nerd. 
“ Sit. ” Damian pointed to the chair, Jon muttering ”Bossy.” under his breath.
“Let me make myself extremely clear, Jonathan, I have one job here, and that is to raise your grades. If I don't, it will not look good for me, and will look even worse for you. I’m not here for you to flirt with, make friends, or be stared at, nor roped into whatever it is you have going on here.” Damian gestured to his whole with a manilla folder in hand.
Well. If that wasn’t both flat out rejection and  warning all at once, Jon'd be dammed. It hurt his pride slightly and added more fuel to the slowly building flame of annoyance.
“And what is this , exactly? Is that why you’re here? Teacher’s Pet turns the bad one into a brand-new man ?” 
Damian snorted. “As if anyone could part you from your disastrous fashion and life choices. No, as I've stated, I'm here to make your grades better, by having you do all the work.”
“That’s a contradictory statement.”
“Would you look at that, you’re already using your big boy words.” He deadpanned, flipping open the folder to show Jon’s transcripts.
“Honestly, just looking at these makes me want to burn them. The only class you are currently passing is AP Physics, with an 89%.” 
Huh, apparently he wasn’t completely dense.
“I can taste the approval, do good grades turn you on?” Jon taunted. “Must be so great, getting all the way to the top with only Daddy’s money.”
A dangerous scowl overtook his face and Jon quickly realized that was too far for today.
“For your information, Kent , not everyone has managed to stay in this school based on money and reputation alone, despite your clearly projected opinions. Now, should we get started, or do you have any more poorly based comments to share with the class?”
Jon glowered at both him and the papers, shaking his head once in a firm “No.”
“Good.” Damian’s smile was predatory in a way where he knew he had already won.
The other boy put up a stubborn fight when it came to learning, purposefully answering questions wrong and poking at Damian to watch him snap.There was a self-satisfied smirk when he did so, the older boy looking as if he wished to slap it off his face. 
After the third or fourth time of this, Damian slammed the math book closed.
“Kent, I’d like to pride myself on endurance when it comes to annoyances, due to several older brothers and sisters. However, should this continue, I have no qualms about leaving you to repeat your next two years five times over.”
“Can’t handle the heat, get out of the oven.” Jon challenged.
Damian, to his annoyance, appeared unfazed. “I should be saying this to you, when a few years from now, you’ll still be here. Now, should I go, or will you at least look like you’re attempting to be competent?”
Pretty face, pretty form, ugly words. 
Jon bit at his bottom lip, face turning into more of a petulant pout then a scowl. “Fine.”
What a child.
Damian made a dismissive ‘tt’ noise, and began the lesson again.
Two hours later, they emerged from the school, one with his pride flattened and brimming with emotions, and one with a folder and a smug smirk.
Jon spotted his elder brother Kon in the corner of the parking lot, perched on a motorcycle. He had a stupidly knowing grin on his face, causing Jon to scowl.
He swung a leg over the side and held onto his brother’s jacket.
“Next week, I expect you to be on time. Understood, Kent?” Damian tapped a pen to the large folder he held. He seemed completely undaunted by the fact that there was a motorcycle being driven by the school’s ex-local bad boy in front of him.
“Whatever.” 
“Try again, Kent.”
Jon huffed. “Yes, I'll try to make it on time.” 
“Good.” Damian flipped through the folder in front of him. “Your superiors will be pleased with these results. If you continue like this, we’ll be seeing a significant increase in your performance marks.”’
He nodded towards Kon as he closed the folder. “Have a pleasant evening, Connor. You as well, Jonathan.”
He walked away and the moment he was out of earshot, Kon pulled off his helmet and began to howl with laughter.
“Oh my God, you are whipped !” 
“Shut the fuck up, Connor, I am not and I hate his guts! Self-righteous little brat .” Jon hissed.
“He has you wrapped around his finger! At this rate, he’ll have whipped you into shape by the end of the semester!” He wiped away tears of laughter, chuckling still.
“I will resist.” Jon scowled. “And you’re smudging your eyeliner.”
“Am not! Brat.” Kon then returned to his knowing smirk. “Bet five bucks you thought he was hot, tried to hit on him and he rejected you to high hell.”
Jon’s silence was proof enough, sending Kon into another fit of laughter.
“Those Wayne boys, Jonno. The way you were headed, I’m surprised fate’s taken this long to send one to you. First Wally, then Roy, then me, and now you.”
“I will continue where I'm headed, and no stupid, annoying, pot-stirring stuck up good boys with pretty eyes are going to change me. Now drive.”
He kicked his older brother’s leg, Kon pulling his helmet back on. “Whatever you say, superbrat. But when you come crying to me when you can’t get past their straight A’s no-time-for-feelings exterior, I’ll have a bigass ‘told you so’ waiting for ya.”
Jon glowered as the bike started up. “Well, you can save it, cause it won’t happen!”
“Can’t hear you!” Kon sing-songed over the roar of the bike.
“Asshole!”
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lisashines · 1 year
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instagram
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