All Good Things Must End

Ray/gn!reader;

From the beginning, you trusted Ray with all your heart. He was the embodiment of your fairytale dream come to life. Your respite from all the unappealing troubles of the outside world. But all fairytales have an ending to them. And yours is not as happy as you expected.

CW: brief mention of violence, erratic behavior, depiction of a codependent relationship. This is a Danger Ray fic! Set during V's route. Loosely based on the 7th day outgoing call to V (11:51 AM, after the 'Provoke' chatroom).

Lovely dividers by @/saradika-graphics!

Ray was a good man. A kind man. A fragile man, even. His entire appearance would remind you of a beautiful but delicate flower. So starved for love and warmth, yet so sensitive to every harsh touch of the wind, even the slightest of pushes against its soft petals would make it start to wilt. A flower that needed nothing but some gentle care and love for it to come into bloom. And, of course, you were willing to give him just that. After all, why wouldn't you be? Ray has been nothing but kind and caring towards you, ever since you stepped foot into this strange place, guiding you along the way while holding your hand and not minding any of your clumsy mistakes. He was understanding. Attentive. Curious. Always checking in with you and eager to hear about your day. Never ignoring you or making you feel stupid if you didn't understand a thing or two.

No wonder you found it so easy to open up to him in your short time here. You trusted that he would do no wrong by you. Just as he promised.

At least... that's what you thought. And appearances can be deceiving. Oh, so very deceiving. Now, it felt downright humiliating just how much of a blind fool you really were. How stupidly determined you were to deny and rebuke anyone daring to challenge your views on Ray.

You loyally refused to trust Rika's musings about Ray's 'darkness' during your brief stay with her, dismissing them as nothing but her twisted philosophy that you couldn't even begin to comprehend. You impulsively denied V's numerous warnings not to trust in Ray's sugary words, reassuring yourself over and over again that surely his affections for you must be true and earnest. You turned your back on every nagging suspicion buzzing at the back of your mind during short moments of unrest. You knew in your heart that Ray was a kind, tender boy. He was simply confined to an environment that would exacerbate his worst traits.

And he was only human, right? No one is immune to harmful outside influences being forced down upon them. Anyone could end up in his place one day, even you. It was no reason for you to be hostile and distrustful of him.

Then again, maybe that was just your mind trying desperately to keep you calm in the midst of a horrible storm you found yourself being forcibly thrust into. After all, accepting just how truly bad and out of your control things truly were here... How utterly helpless and vulnerable you were, with no one there to come save you if you needed it... How trapped and isolated you were in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by nothing but miles and miles of lush mountain forests, with no civilization in sight...

Just the thought of it would make a heavy lump of acidic bile rise up to your throat. The sad truth is... Ray simply provided you with feelings of solace and comfort that some deeper, weaker part of you was so desperate for. Losing that was something you were not ready to face yet. He was there by your side from day one. He had a better understanding of you than anyone else did. Of course you would cling to his familiar presence for this brief feeling of stability you yearned for so gravely.

In retrospect, it was always a losing battle for you to try and win. You could have done better. You really, really could have done so much better. Yet it still hit you harder than a sledgehammer to the back of your skull, when the bitter reality has finally reared its ugly head to you, without any regard for your fragile heart.

You resent yourself for hitting that call button despite your gut screaming at you not to. You were already well aware that you would regret doing that, somewhere on the back of your mind. But, in the moment, your worry for your friend overpowered your lingering anxiety. Maybe out of some sense of duty. V made it all the way here, just to save you. You played a big role in his capture, in a way. If it wasn't for you, he wouldn't be in danger. And not knowing a single thing about his whereabouts or even his state was... daunting.

So, you dialed his phone number.

You anticipated that he wouldn't pick up. Maybe you would receive a very brief phone call with him begging you to keep yourself safe, like he always would. Or even just a quick exchange of words between you two that would maybe give you even the tiniest of clues on his whereabouts. Something you could then relay to Seven. Make yourself useful. Actually do something, instead of just sitting there and driving yourself mad with dozens upon dozens of anxious thoughts clouding your mind.

What you received was worse than you could have ever imagined.

It was one thing to hear pained groans, gasps, and raspy coughing on the other end of the line. You already had an expectation that V would not be okay when you hear his voice. It still left your knees feeling weak and your heart lurching in your chest with a dizzying intensity, but you could handle that, to an extent. What you couldn't handle was also hearing a familiar soft-spoken voice that has become an unstated but undeniable source of comfort for you. A voice that was now sounding so cold and angry, that your brain had a hard time comprehending what was happening, seemingly shutting down completely, as you remained deathly quiet for the whole duration of that cursed call.

Ray just was not supposed to be there.

You have heard him get angry before. You have heard him lose his grip on reality before. You have heard him say things you couldn't truly agree with, despite you still going along with them regardless, to avoid causing him any disturbance. Those were all aspects of him you were not blind to. You just actively chose to overlook them whenever they would come up. Something that you probably shouldn't have done.

-But you never heard him be so downright cruel and vicious before. Seemingly not at all disturbed by the very real sounds of suffering from the other living person there with him. Even getting angrier at them.

Like it was something completely normal. Not at all worth getting upset or worried over.

You couldn't wrap your head around the fact that this was the same man that worried himself sick over you simply scraping a knee. He was so caring, so empathetic to you back then... over a small cut, of all things. And now, that very same man was not at all disturbed by such grave suffering happening right in front of him.

No, by the sounds of it... he was actively causing it.

And that's not something you could live in peace with.

The call lasted for a maximum of two minutes. That's the time that your phone would display to you whenever you mindlessly return to it, anyway. But it felt way longer than that. For those two horrible minutes, your ears were ruthlessly subjected to the merciless reality you were so desperate to avoid facing up until that very moment.

The bitter truth was that Ray is not a fragile flower. Nor is he a prince from a fairytale. For, fairytales are not reality. No matter how much you want them to be. He was a man, a human being, just like you. Just like every other person in this building. And much like any human being, he was more than capable of causing harm by his own two hands if he so chooses. In fact, he would do so purposefully. And a victim of his spiraling wrath was no longer some faceless unlucky believer that you could forget about in a matter of hours, despite you genuinely feeling bad for them. No, it was your friend. A friend who fought so desperately to save you, even at the cost of his own safety. A friend you have come to care for in the short time you have known each other.

A friend, you knew for sure didn't deserve to be suffering in the way that he was. By the hands of your other friend you cared for just as deeply.

Such reality was just too cruel for you to bear.

So, you do the most foolish thing of all.

You confront Ray head-on.

"-Y/N, you must be confused... I've done no wrong. I do admit that I... did loose myself for a moment there, but- but it was his own fault! If he just kept quiet and drank the elixir like my Savior has instructed, I wouldn't get so upset with him. And he kept saying his stupid lies... He wouldn't shut up. My head hurt so bad... You have no idea."

You are left feeling sick to your very core by the soft apologetic smile reflected on Ray's face, once you do have a chance to finally face him again. No matter what you say, how hard you try to show him how wrong and cruel his actions really were, it was all completely pointless. For someone so seemingly skittish and subservient, Ray was frustratingly stubborn in his beliefs. It was like throwing a tennis ball at a wall. The more force you put into your throw to get your point across, the harder it just bounces right back into your face, leaving you with the painful sting of your failure.

You shake your head, an ugly mess of emotions steadily clouding your sense of judgment. At some point, you lose track of your location and position. All caution goes out the window. All that remains is a debilitating feeling of betrayal, clutching at your insides like metal rods slowly puncturing your very heart. "It is still wrong, Ray! How can you not see that!? He was suffering, and you just- just-"

The words don't come out of your mouth, obstructed by the suffocating lump stuck in the middle of your throat. You were going in circles now. You have been trying to get through to him for almost ten minutes straight, and still no results. You have to take a moment to try and regain your breathing. A soft glowed hand rests gently upon your chin, causing you to tilt your head to meet Ray's gaze instead.

You are disgusted by the genuine concern etched onto his delicate features. By the unfeigned emotions of nothing but genuine care and affection swimming in his eyes as he looks at you. By the tender touch warming up your clammy skin. All of it is sincere. You know he is not lying to you. Not right now, at least. And that is a sickening realization to come to.

More than anything, you are disgusted by the simple fact that you cannot perceive him as a monster or an angel. Ray is no perfect prince from a fairytale, no matter how hard he may try and appear to you as such.

He's a human.

Just like you.

And this implies that he is capable of all the atrocities that any human being is capable of. As much as he is kind to you, he can also be cruel to others. As much as his hands soothe and tremble when they brush up against yours, they can also hurt and sully those he harbors hatred for. It's not all black and white, as you would like to delude yourself into thinking.

And his actions were truly appalling to you. You couldn't live in your fantasy world anymore. It was sullied. Destroyed beyond repair. Your Wonderland has been corrupted from the start, and you just denied each and every sign of it, until it was too late.

"My prince/ss... It pains me to see you in such distress. Though, your tender heart is another trait of you that I adore," Ray whispers to you softly, his thumb lightly brushing over your cheekbone. He was touching you so gently, it's almost like you were made out of glass. And yet, just a few hours earlier, these exact hands were causing so much suffering to someone you care so deeply about. The thought prompts you to swallow hard and clutch your hands together as they start to shake. He continues, seemingly undisturbed by your lack of a positive response. "-But believe me when I say that that villain is not deserving of your compassion. He tried to take you away from me... To ruin what you and I have built together. I cannot stand by and watch him do that to us. What if you got hurt because of him? I would never forgive myself, if that were to happen."

You shut your eyes, refusing to accept the reality unfolding before you. Everything was wrong. So very wrong. One part of you wanted to scream and shout at him, to make him see the twisted nature of his words by pure unrelenting force if you have to. But there was another part of you that contemplated just giving up and concluding this interaction altogether. The debilitating feeling of helplessness was just too much for you to handle.

You are not allowed to do either of those things, however. Instead, another hand lightly rests on the small of your back, pulling you in towards the source of your distress. And you don't fight it. You feel your forehead come in contact with Ray's chest, his flowery scent filling your senses, as both of his arms are now circling around you. You hear a happy sigh fall from his lips. It all seemed like a very cruel joke on you. A moment that seemed so sweet and touching, bringing you nothing but more hurt and anguish.

Did he really not see anything amiss with any of this?

"I missed you so much, my flower... You know, when I heard that liar try and talk to me like he knew you better than I do, I felt like I might just strangle him right then and there. Make sure he never utters your lovely name ever again." Ray's voice is slightly gruff from how quiet it is against the side of your head. A low hum vibrates in his throat as he nuzzles into your hair like an affectionate cat would, breathing in your scent with all the longing you could possibly ask for. Though, the only thing that comes from his affections is a sickening feeling of dread for you.

"-But I thought of you. I thought of your lovely smile... Your eyes, your voice. I know I shouldn't think like this, but... You gave me more strength than my Savior's words ever did. What I did... I did for you. For us, Y/N." He continues, taking a step back from the hug to look at you. Your gaze is cast low, as you don't reciprocate the gesture. You can't bring yourself to look at him right now. It's hard to even keep yourself from putting your hands over your ears to avoid hearing it all. He gently tilts your head up, however, making it clear that he wants you to look at him. "Please don't be upset... It breaks my heart to see you sad because of that villain."

That's when the dam inside of you finally shatters, all repressed emotions spilling out in a violent wave of hopelessness you cannot bring yourself to stop. You wrench yourself away from Ray's arms, your own hands now clenched into tight fists as you look him directly in the eyes. There's a fire burning ever hotter inside of your chest, and you make no attempt to put it out. You let it take over you completely, consequences be damned.

"Villain?Villain!? Ray, he did all he could to save me! And you locked him up and tortured him for that!"

Your mind is screaming at you to stop. To stop and fix things before they spiral too out of your control.

You're being too aggressive. Too blunt. Too disobedient. Staying safe requires you to be both calm and smart about this. And you are neither of those things right now.

But you don't care.

Even as you see the emotions in Ray's eyes shift from that suffocating affection to a mix of desperation and frustration you know well. He makes a step towards you. You make two steps back. This makes his brows furrow in what you could only assume was dissatisfaction.

You never backed away from him before.

"Save you...? No. No. Y/N, he tried to steal you from me. Poison you with his lies, like he has done to my Savior. He did it to me, too! I'm the one who saved you. I did what had to be done to protect you!" You can actively hear his voice changing from the shaky disbelief at your denial of him to rough desperation to prove you wrong. It's borderline scary how quick those changes are occurring right in front of your eyes. Almost in a blink of an eye. It's yet another blaring warning for you to stop.

One that you ignore.

Instead, your frustration boils up inside of you, making you sneer at his stubborn refusal to see reason: "By hurting him!? By making him choke and gag in pain? What was the point of-"

Your angry line of thought is instantaneously interrupted by a small yeep that slips past your lips, as Ray closes in on you in just a couple of quick steps, grabbing at your wrists with a tight grip. Tight enough to cause you some discomfort. His eyes are wide, and his breathing is noticeably shaky. Like he's fighting to get enough air into his lungs and failing miserably. He yanks you close, making you stumble into him without much time for you to struggle or push back against him. Mostly due to your state of pure disbelief. You never expected Ray to actually do anything to you. And while he wasn't actively hurting you, this was still shattering your perception of him to bits and pieces. Or, what remained of it.

"That was nothing, Y/N. He deserved all of that. He deserved that and more. You feel sad for him? You wish mercy on him?" You are suddenly pushed back against the wall, and Ray's slim form keeps you trapped in this makeshift cage you created for yourself with your reckless actions. Ray's voice grows shakier, yet also significantly lower. It sounded dangerous. Angry. His nose brushes up against yours, as he's leaning so close to you, you can't focus on anything but him. Your breath hitches as you instinctively press yourself up against the wall, the panicked pounding of your heart echoing in your temples. "You have no idea how badly he hurt me. What pain I went through because of that- that-"

You can't help but wince in pain as his grip on you tightens. An action that seems to immediately shake Ray out of his temporary fit of anger, as he gasps and quickly lets go of you, stumbling backwards with a frightened expression painted over his features. You don't even have to look at him to know that he is probably in a less than stable state of mind. You are left staggered, betrayed and confused, as you stand there, eyes cast low, rubbing at your wrists. They didn't hurt. Not much, at least. It's the psychological aspect of it that left an impact of you.

Ray's voice feels muffled as it reaches your ears through the constant flow of thought in your head.

"I- N-No, Y/N, I'm sorry, I didn't want to- Are you hurt?" You can see him taking a step back towards you, hand reaching out for yours, probably to check on your wrists. You can tell he's scared. And upset. Probably guilty. Which makes this even harder for you to grapple with.

Either way, you cut him off, not wanting to hear any more of this. Partially because you understand that staying to listen will only cause you to break further, if it was even possible at this point. Because he sounds so genuine, nervous, and miserable, it makes your heart ache for him despite yourself. Makes you want to look up, smile, and say that you're okay. That you two can figure it out together.

And you don't want to repeat the same mistake twice.

"Just... Leave, Ray." You mutter out quietly, not raising your eyes at him. You sound a bit too soft for your liking, but it'll do. Swallowing, you repeat yourself for good measure. "Please. Leave."

There is a prolonged pause between the two of you. It's almost too lengthy for comfort. Neither of you say anything for a while. But the tension in the air is thick, and it does not fade with time. It only grows. Crawling over you like snakes. There is a fear within you that prevents you from looking at him. A fear of seeing the pain in his eyes. Or, instead, to come face to face with that same anger that felt so alien to you.

Ray finally speaks up. His voice is barely audible.

"...N-No..."

He moves closer to you still. For the second time today, you are finding yourself backing away. But now, you turn your back on him and keep your hands locked where you can see them. You can feel them shaking. With a sigh, you repeat: "Leave."

And, as you soon learn, that was not a very wise choice for you to make.

You're quickly spun around before you can think to act, and Ray's fingers are digging into your shoulders with a disturbing intensity, leaving you little time to react. He's observing you as if you were a wounded animal that was left behind after being hit by a car. Like you're the saddest creature he had ever seen. And, for some reason, that look scares you more than the previous anger he showed you.

"I can't believe this..." He murmurs under his breath, his eyes darting over your figure, almost like he was searching for something physical on you that could be visible to the human eye. But he doesn't find it, and that seems to upset him further. You try to pull away from him, only to get jerked back in again, his hold on you tightening.

Only this time, he does not pay any attention to your visible discomfort. He was too occupied with his own thoughts that you were not aware of. It's like he doesn't even see you. Not fully, anyways.

He holds your chin and tilts your face to examine you more closely. As he does, his shaky breath sneaks over your cheek and causes you to shiver in place.

"He... He poisoned you, didn't he...?"

The hushed murmur sounds so utterly ridiculous that it almost makes you forget about the disturbing nature of this situation for a good moment. Yet, he was completely serious. And he wasn't even talking to you, by the looks of it.

"What? Ray, I-"

"-That's why you are saying all these things to me... That's why you don't trust me anymore." Ray cuts you off as if you were not there, his brows furrowing into a deep scowl, but not one aimed directly at you. One of his hands grips onto your chin, while the other finds your hand and takes it into his own, his fingers sliding between yours. He grasps it tight, in a hold that would feel reassuring, if it wasn't for the circumstances. "My Y/N wouldn't tell me to leave. I should've guessed..."

A shiver of fear runs down your spine. As your outburst of frustration subsides, you slowly start to realize the seriousness of this situation for you, as the fire of anger and betrayal subsides. Now you wish Ray was angry again. At least then he still listened to you. But how can you fix things when he doesn't even acknowledge you?

"-Don't worry," You are brought back to reality by a warm and assuring smile on Ray's face. One that only makes you feel nauseous. He leans in and presses a kiss to your forehead, making your breath hitch. Staying there, he whispers onto your skin, like a secret promise only for your ears to hear. "I will fix it, my prince/ss. I shouldn't have been away from you for this long in the first place... My Savior is far too busy to give you the care and attention you need. But now, I'm here. And I'm not leaving your side again. I promise. I'll make sure you are smiling again."

He does not let go of you again. While your fairytale might have been broken, his has only begun its story. And his happily ever after is not something he will give up on. Even if you did.

Revolutionary Girl Utena Episode 4 Liveblog

Join us this week for discussions of time, projecting fantasies onto others, non-diegetic inserts, and “I didn’t realize this was going to be a hentai”

This episode starts with a flashforward structure, rather than a flashback to the fairytale. This is also our first two-part episode, which is something I might come back to later in the series -- every one of the Student Council gets a two-part duel at some point, most of which are in the third arc (Saionji becomes a prop for Wakaba’s story in the BRS), but Miki gets his in the very beginning. (I’m not sure what to do with Touga here, since he arguably gets two multi-part episodes, one in the first arc and one in the last arc.)

Regardless, opening with letting us know that Utena will have to face Miki in the Dueling Arena is a unique choice here. No other characters get that kind of flashforward. I think that this happens for a few reasons. The kind of obvious, teaching you how to watch the show reason is that this is our first duel with someone other than Saionji, and we are being told by the series both that the characters aren’t what they seem at first glance (sweet, gentle Miki is shown to be possessive and antagonistic) and that we should, all along, not be taking these characters at face value. Having Miki challenge Utena to a duel without the flashforward would create a greater element of surprise, but surprise is not the motivating factor here -- rather, the show is telling us to look for clues as to how these characters are functioning. (I think that it also creates even more tension to know from the start of these two episodes that Miki will challenge Utena to a duel, since you are then anticipating what events could possibly lead up to it.) 

The other, less surface-level answer is that Miki, of all the Duelists (well, all the ‘main’ Duelists, not counting Mikage), has the closest and strangest relationship with time. We’ve already witnessed this with his use of the stopwatch. He’s also the character who is most out of sorts with time in his story arc -- Juri has ties to the past, but it’s mostly causing her pain in the present, Saionji has ties to the past and is seeking eternity but is still doing so in the present, Nanami and Touga have some ties to time and the past but it isn’t a major structuring force for either of their characters (I would say they’re both more future-oriented than anything, but not strongly so). Miki, by contrast, is constantly seeking to recapture a lost past that he never really /truly/ had access to. All he has is his memory, tainted heavily with nostalgia, of a childhood he never really got to live or enjoy because he’s a prodigy, and his creepy af fantasies of returning to a sense of oneness with his twin. His entire motivation is about reliving and trying (in vain) to access an idealized version of the past, while he both resists and struggles to fit normatively into the adulthood he is moving towards. It would make sense for these reasons to have the opening of his first set of focus episodes place both him and the audience out of sorts with time by using this flashforward structure (and the later ambiguous transition that makes the flashforward seem almost like a memory).

I would like to take a moment to also appreciate Juri taking the place of Touga as the person dramatically watching from the sidelines. Where even is that location? How many stairs are there to get up there? 

We move directly into the next scene with little in the way of fanfare -- there’s a bit of a dissolve, but the music continues, so it seems like a subjective view or memory of Miki’s, which gives some ambiguity to when the scene with Nanami takes place. Is it after the duel and Miki is just moping around after losing, or does it take place before? It takes place before (as later plot developments show, but looking at it closer, it’s left pretty ambiguous in terms of cinematic structure, if not in terms of narrative.

Miki is also a dramatic edgelord in this scene and I feel like he’s always seen as so soft and sweet and innocent that people forget this side of him. He’s just as extra as the rest of the Duelists. 

This is a pretty ambiguous line -- we’re led to think that “she” is Anthy, since Nanami finds Anthy’s photo right after this line is spoken, but it could just as easily be Kozue. Of course, we don’t know that Kozue exists yet on a first watch, so the ambiguity only works on subsequent viewings. But since Anthy becomes a Kozue stand-in for Miki, I feel like this comparison works.

Anthy slap count: 4 (drink another shot!)

Miki timed the exact moment when he needs to go rescue Anthy from the Mean Girls Brigade with his stopwatch. Oh my god. How extra can you be.

I haven’t gone through and tested this theory, but I feel like Miki episodes are far more likely to get non-diegetic inserts like this one. It’s meant to punctuate the scene (marking in this case Miki blushing when anthy thanks him for saving her), and I’m wondering why these tend to show up the most in his episodes. Does he have the most tenuous grip on the diegetic world of the show (see also: the stopwatch)? Is there something about Miki’s character on a diegetic level that would make sense for there to be a lot of non-diegetic inserts (such as his living in a fantasy world moreso than the other characters, despite all of them having to face ‘reality’ in some way or another, even if that ‘reality’ is the construct of the narrative)? Regardless, these moments really point to the ways in which the narrative structures here start to break down.

We interrupt your scheduled liveblogging to present Juri dramatically walking down the stairs in the coolest library your school will never have. (I believe the library set makes a reappearance in the BRS, but is largely underutilized.)

We also bring you

Juri’s utter confusion at Miki talking about happiness, and quickly changing the topic. “Happiness? what’s that?”

Though, this scene shows part of what Miki’s problem is -- instead of focusing on what he can do to better himself and create his own happiness, he places all of that happiness on the idealized figure of another person. I can’t decide if this is a typically feminine trait or if he’s doing it in the typically masculine (after all, the Manic Pixie Dream Girl exists as a trope) way.

Another scene of Utena being shocked by someone having the ring...how has she not learned yet that the people with the weird outfits are part of the Student Council? Is it really that much of a shock?

While Anthy is, by now, used to being the site of projected fantasies by others, this particular projection is one that puzzles me more the more I think about it. Up to this point, we’ve pretty much only seen Anthy in Rose Bride persona -- meek, submissive, ultra feminine -- and we haven’t seen her ‘witch’ persona yet (at least, nothing more than the tiniest of hints of it). We haven’t seen Kozue at all, and I feel like her reveal is meant to be a bit of a shock that contrasts to Anthy (or the Anthy we see here), but even so, Kozue must be the site of even more projection by Miki, since she is brash and revels in being the ‘bad girl’ and is about as far from this side of Anthy as you can get. What is it about Anthy, then, or at least the side of her we see here, that reminds Miki of Kozue, besides his own highly rose-tinted memories of her?

Then again, they may be more similar upon a rewatch than we see at first glance.

I think that the way that Miki talks about the mysterious “girl he knows” is meant to make her seem distant, like he no longer knows her, or like she died, or something along those lines, but she’s still very much in his life. Hell, they still live together. Here it’s more of a metaphorical distance than a physical or temporal one. It’s also building up the slow reveal of Kozue, and an opportunity for Miki to be even more dramatic. ;]

 How much do you want to bet that Anthy failed her test on purpose as an excuse to push Miki into dueling?

The scenes where Miki is playing piano seem to corroborate the issues with the sense of time that his episodes have. I’d post a gif if I could, but his movements aren’t fluid here -- he pauses in one area and then it fades to the next pose -- creating a sense of being out of joint with time. (I think part of this is to save on animation costs -- fewer inbetweens when they have a more complicated lighting scheme -- but it still holds)

And we all know that music is an inherently temporal medium.

Also, Touga showed up out of literally nowhere just now.

These shots move between diegetic (subjective viewpoint, or a memory) and non-diegetic, it seems. They seem to be non-diegetic inserts during the duel itself, but here, it seems to be a memory.

Note the way that it is drawn to look like a photo in an album or illustration in a children’s book. This isn’t a “real” memory, but rather an ideal.

The butterflies even float on top of the picture, leaving drop shadows, further cementing this as subjective, not objective.

I don’t have too much to say about the Shadow Girls play this time, though it is operating on two levels: one is the surface level of warning you that the girl you seek may not be what she seems (both Anthy and Kozue in this case), and the other is the level of “wow B-ko’s first love was kind of an asshole if he left her over things as trivial as liking pro wrestling,” which is to say, it’s also an indictment of people like Miki who project their fantasies of what a ‘proper’ girl should be onto their love objects.

I don’t have much to say about the “Operation: Himemiya Anthy is a weirdo who keeps a [weird animal] in her [domestic space]” segment (though I do thoroughly enjoy it), aside from noting that it speaks to this sense of projection -- not only is Miki so enamored with Anthy that he thinks it’s cute that she has a pencil tin full of snails, but Nanami is wanting to project her own weirdness onto Anthy for the sake of the others. Nanami is the one walking around with a live octopus in her bag, but she’s not the weirdo -- Anthy is.

Nanami really does have the best magical thinking of any of the characters, though. It’s exactly like a 13 year old to /keep trying these things/ even though it’s obvious that it’s not going to work, and even if it wasn’t obvious from the start, it should have been after the first failed attempt.

I do enjoy the snail getting a spinning rose frame, though.

I’ve seen enough hentai to know where this is going.

I’m not sure I understand the moment with the elephant flipbook. She starts laughing uncontrollably while playing with it, and Utena tells her to be serious. Is she actually laughing at the pranks she just played on Nanami and can’t control herself? Is she actually enjoying herself with the flipbook? Is it (along with the animals and the shaved ice) meant to show her as childish? Is it foreshadowing for the elephants that will arrive in a few episodes?

Nanami’s outburst here is interesting for a few reasons, as well. She seems to be concerned with the fact that while Anthy seems to be the image of the ‘proper’ feminine love object for many people, she’s actually rather improper, as we have seen all episode. While this is at least partially a policing of other women’s femininity, it can also be seen an Nanami starting to see through Anthy’s facade and the facade of the entire dueling game, whether she realizes it or not, long before she simply rejects the system altogether.

And we conclude with explicitly pointing to the ‘sunlit garden’ as a site of fantasy, not of real memory, as shown by substituting Anthy into the memories/photographs.

Join us next week for the thrilling conclusion! Will Miki duel Utena? Will he win Anthy’s hand? Will he ever regain his ‘shining thing’? Is Kozue one of the best characters in this show? 

As always, if you have comments or want to discuss anything in more depth, please do so.

I’m finding all the CS wedding hype rather amusing… I said I was done with this show a while back but split Queen lured me back in. I bailed again because the show hasn’t redeemed itself and I don’t believe this wedding is an indication of a happy ending. I’m not going to talk about that today. Today is for the upcoming musical episode, where the fan focus hasn’t really been about the musical element at all, it’s been the Captain Swan wedding. Captain Swan are getting married! They are endgame and SwanQueeners will just have to deal with it and accept that Captain Swan is the most beautiful love story ever told, and oh my god Jen chose a wedding dress Grace Kelly wore in a movie called “The Swan” and Grace Kelly was such a style icon that this wedding is so iconic because Captain Swan is the purest of true loves and that must be why Jen chose the dress and they are gonna live happily ever after and they’ll finally have sex on their honeymoon and have CS babies and won’t that be just so wonderfully fantastic! 🙄 I wonder if my fake fangirling and heavily sarcastic tone was detectable in that speech… My response to the first part, about the wedding actually happening is… it may happen, and it may not. Even when couples say “I do” and wear rings after tying the knot, it does not necessarily mean that it is true love and they will live happily ever after. Princess Diana wasn’t happy in her marriage to Prince Charles and look how that ended, which was also dubbed as a fairytale once upon a time by those who knew nothing of Diana’s life or her marriage. 👸🏼 Aside from the fact that all true love’s kisses on OUAT happen during a curse, and it’s always been the first kiss shared that breaks a curse, Captain Swan have had their first kiss outside of a relationship and outside a curse in Neverland so I wouldn’t expect a rainbow blast then. Snowing only get those happen when they are in a curse. In Ruby Slippers, Red kissed Dorothy to break her out of a sleeping curse - first kiss rainbow blast. Hades and Zelena’s first kiss broke the curse Hades brother placed upon him so they got their rainbow blast. Aurora was woken by Phillip and it was the first kiss we saw between them… the only time where a curse has been broken without a kiss was during the frozen arc with but it wasn’t a curse as such, it was a spell. The spell of shattered sight. Spells are different to curses. ✨ So Captain Swan had their first kiss and subsequently been in curses & true love’s kiss has never actually worked for them. You can argue all the other red herrings of Captain Swan being true love but the fact is a true love’s kiss is what is meant to break any curse, true love being the strongest magic of all and that still has not happened. Why is that??? Maybe they are saving it for the wedding day CSers cry. Maybe they are, it is a possibility. But in my opinion it’s highly unlikely. You should know Adam and Eddy’s way of writing by now. What they show you in canon text is NEVER what is intended. Unless of course you refer to the Snowing ship. This is why SUBTEXT is so important. I’m not talking about SwanQueen subtext. I’m not even going to go into a SwanQueen is endgame argument, which may shock you. No, I’m going to just use the OUAT storytelling as it has always been to make my point without bringing SwanQueen into it. 😧 Firstly, this is Adam and Eddy we are talking about. The same guys who gave us the mysterious Lost series, where we were trying to figure out what the hell was going on with this strange island that attracted planes to crash into it that people miraculously survived from. The people were stranded and trying to find a way off the island. The island at first seemed like some sort of conspiracy. There was a Dhama project and the word Dhama in Buddhism means TRUTH. So there was this element of trying to figure out what the truth was. This place didn’t make any sense and was totally confusing. Turns out that it wasn’t a reality as such. Seeing as many years have passed since then I think I am safe to say it… the island was some form of purgatory. They were held there and when some vanished in whatever fate was bestowed upon them, that was their soul moving from purgatory. At least that’s how it was interpreted. The ending actually infuriated a lot of viewers. 😤 So if you aren’t familiar with Adam and Eddy’s work, I suggest that you get to know it and understand that nothing is as straightforward as it seems where those two are involved in the writing. If they are happy with a wedding spoiler to be released (the guys who are strictly “no comment no spoilers”) then it’s safe to say that this wedding isn’t actually going to be as it seems. 💍🙊 Do you remember when Rumple’s dad played “Follow the Lady” before he became Peter Pan? It’s the three card trick where the player must keep their eyes on the marked card (the Queen) whilst it is shuffled around with two joker cards though some use aces. This is also called three card monte. When the swindler has finished moving them around, the player must choose the marked card (the Queen). The players watch carefully trying to keep an eye on that marked card focusing so hard on what they are told to focus on. Only when they turn the card over they believe is the marked card, it turns out they have been focused on one of the two jokers. This is Adam and Eddy’s game when they tell a story. They are telling you to focus so hard on the wedding. It’s the marked card. But when the wedding scene actually happens, you can bet your bottom dollar that when that card gets turned over, you’ll end up with a joker, and the wedding isn’t what it seems. ♠️♥️♣️♦️🃏 This is why SUBTEXT is actually more important than CANON TEXT! Things that are canon because they are written and verbally stated by characters, are generally what they WANT you to focus on, so when they flip that card (the plot) you feel like a fool staring down at a joker. So when it comes to that episode I think I’m gonna sit back, sip my tea, and have a giggle at all these CSers flipping their shit because they truly believed they are actually going to get what they want. 🐸☕️ Naturally they won’t direct their frustration with Adam on twitter, oh no, the’ll misdirect that anger at Swen because they’ll convince themselves that Adam and Eddy listened to us and gave in. But if it goes the way Adam and Eddy like to play, Swen won’t get what they want out of this episode which would be for Emma to realise she is making a mistake at the very least, and as a bonus run off with Regina. Yeah that’s not going to happen either, although it is nice to dream it at this point. What happens in the future who knows? The thing with Adam and Eddy is they aren’t afraid to give nobody what they want or hope for. OutlawQueen didn’t have a true love’s kiss, they didn’t even utter the words “I love you” - funny how that without saying I love you that their relationship can be seen as canon love because of the obvious subtext, whereas something like SwanQueen can’t because they aren’t dating. 🙃 But not going there. 😋 Realistically, it’s been 6 years, and in that time nobody ever gets what they want, and only side characters have ever had true love’s kiss because other wise the story would be over and done with quick if all the mains got their happy endings. I mean, y'all should have learned the routine by now CSers. Oh but what am I thinking, of course you haven’t learned the routine because only canon written things are important to you. Silly me! 🐸☕️ As for the Grace Kelly wedding dress, and the movie The Swan in which Grace Kelly appeared in… let me clear up a few things, seeing as I tend to watch a lot of vintage movies. I love to watch Grace Kelly, Marilyn Monroe, Audrey Hepburn, Doris Day… not only to see such a difference with acting back then to how it is today, but because these women were fashion icons of their time and are still icons in history. I have a particular interest in styles of those eras and how very different they were compared to the styles around today. But the movies… the actresses were great, but the messages of them weren’t always. Some were quite degrading to women in my opinion; The Swan being one of them. 🐥 The premise of the Swan… Prince Albert, visits a banished family of nobles. Their matriarch ( to spell it out for you this means the head of the family) Princess Beatrix (who seemed to act like more of a domineering queen), wants her daughter Alexandra, to marry her own cousin Albert so that the family will be welcomed back into the kingdom. So Alexandra’s mother encourages her to flirt with Albert to gain his affections to regain regal status as she believes he will fall in love with her, marry her, and they can finally rule a kingdom again. (Reiterating this point to CSers because generally they only focus of context rather than any subtext… this is not love, because love is not a choice and love isn’t manipulation in order to gain status or material possessions). 🙄 Princess Beatrix: Oh my dear child, this is the one thing, the one opportunity that all your life I’ve been praying for - for you to become a queen. - Doesn’t she sound like Cora! Not at all like Snow. The one opportunity in all YOUR life that I’VE been praying for. Never mind whether Alexandra has any feelings of her own. I’ll just dream your life for you and you do as I say to fulfil my own dreams for your life. This is such a common thing. When you think in terms of sexuality, though this has nothing to do with sexuality, a lot of homophobic parents like to do, control and force their child to be in straight relationships they don’t want to be in. Controlling and forcing relationships is something a parent should never do, regardless of whether or not their child is heterosexual or otherwise. Control and manipulation is not an act of unconditional love. Anyway, I digress. So back to the story… 😑 Much to her Beatrix’s dismay, Albert doesn’t show much of an interest in Alexandra. So Beatrix encourages Alexandra to flirt with her tutor, Nicholas in order to rouse Albert’s attention. 😧 Princess Beatrix: My dear child, how do you suppose I came to marry your father? You can’t think a man just gets an idea into his head and asks a woman to marry him? Of course not! All your father ever cared for was horses. He wouldn’t even look at me. So I looked once or twice at the riding master. Your father proposed the very next afternoon - on horseback. 🤔 Don’t you just love pushy manipulative people who become parents who then try to manipulate force their children into a relationship where there is no feeling not to mention the fact that Albert was Alexandra’s cousin? I know you CSers are so quick to jump on an incest wagon when you compare Regina who was no blood relation to Snow, was forced into a marriage with Snow’s father, man she didn’t love and therefore was forced to be a stepmother very temporarily to Snow, whom she didn’t want to be a step parent to, rather than also accept the fact that Hook actually had a relationship with Henry’s biological grandmother by choice, and was Baelfire’s/Neal’s step father by your own logic, was even trying to act as such whilst Baelfire was aboard the Jolly Roger, and therefore acted unbeknown to him as Emma’s step father-in-law… so this marrying of a cousin thing should really be a pleasant thing for you guys to hear. Anyway…. 🙃 Dropping the prince and princess titles as writing that is becoming rather monotonous, Alexandra does as her mother wishes and flirts with her attractive tutor Nicholas. However, later the plan backfires when she develops genuine feelings for Nicholas. Nicholas is already quite taken with Alexandra, so when she invites him to the farewell ball for Albert (her last chance for the plan to work) he eagerly accepts. Later when they are dancing at the ball it appears that Albert is getting jealous, (how very possessive considering his apparent lack of interest) but instead of saying something, he appears to show more interest in playing the bass viol in the orchestra. 🎶🎵🎶 Despite the original intention of using Nicholas, Alexandra realises she is quite taken with Nicholas. Here you can see her conflict where she expresses feelings for him but you can see that she is bound by her ploy in order to gain the Kingdom for her family… 💔 Dr. Nicholas Agi: You’re so sweet and so beautiful… Princess Alexandra: Don’t come any closer Nicholas… I’ve never seen a man in love and… he happens to be in love with me. Dr. Nicholas Agi: Are you so afraid of me? Princess Alexandra: Oh, if I am I want always to be afraid. I want to be so good to you. I want a hundred things. I want to tell you everything that’s in my heart… I want to look after you and spoil you and… oh, eat something. The wanting to always be afraid is a hint of saying I want to always be afraid that I will lose you because that’s how I know, in this confusing time where I feel things for you but I’m trying to gain my cousin’s affections, that my feelings for you are genuine. But obviously she cannot be so transparent and say this aloud because of her mission set by her mother. 😔 Eventually, she tells Nicholas that it was all a ploy to get Albert to propose to her and she suspected he felt this way. She realizes that she has some feelings for him but he feels used and that Alexandra has been disingenuous, so refuses her affection. Albert comes to find out about this situation and is a little taken aback. Albert and Nicholas trade insults, and Nicholas then storms out and tries to leave the next morning. 😭 Alexandra, distraught over what happened, tries to leave with him, but he refuses her again. YES… SHE WANTED NICHOLAS NOT ALBERT! Albert’s mother shows up and gets the entire story and is aghast. Albert actually GIVES HIS BLESSING to the pair and says that when he is king he will allow them back into the country. However, Nicholas is still hurt ends up leaving the mansion without Alexandra. 😭💔 So… there you have it. She didn’t actually want to marry Albert, because she actually loved Nicholas. But royalty being what it is, marrying for love is rare. She did end up marrying Albert but it wasn’t for love. These are the last lines where Albert tries to console Alexandra… 😭 Prince Albert: Your father used to call you his swan, so I am told. I think that’s a good thing to remember. Think what it means to be a swan: to glide like a dream on the smooth surface of the lake, and never go to the shore. On dry land, where ordinary people walk, the swan is awkward, even ridiculous. When she waddles up the bank she painfully resembles a different kind of bird, n'est-ce-pas? Princess Alexandra: A goose. Prince Albert: I’m afraid so. And there she must stay, out on the lake: silent, white, majestic. Be a bird, but never fly. Know one song, but never sing it until the moment of death. And so it must be for you, Alexandra: cool indifference to the staring crowds along the bank. And the song? Never. 😭😭😭💔💔💔 Now… first off, Albert insulted Alexandra. She is graceful but only where she belongs… he doesn’t see her gracefulness in any other circumstance. Out of her natural habitat (i.e. with Nicholas whom she actually had romantic feelings for) she would be awkward and ridiculous. Instead of being the regal beauty that she is, she would be more like a goose. It’s all metaphoric to suggest that she is far too good for a man who was actually a nice guy, but not royal and therefore not worthy, despite the fact that she genuinely loves Nicholas. It was suggesting that her life was to be unfulfilled, and that her cousin who wasn’t interested in her to begin with, and who only did become interested when another man was on the scene, who will give her a life where she can be regal and graceful, but she as a Swan cannot sing her (Swan) song and must be silent and subservient to preserve the perfection illusion for the Kingdom. This is the life she was born into and she should just accept it. 😤 What kind of message is that really to women? To settle for a guy you’re actually related to, in a loveless marriage, living a life where the surface everything looks perfectly regal and wonderful, but she can’t even express herself… sounds like such a wonderful happily ever after, doesn’t it? [Oh sorry, insert sarcastic tone here again!] 🙃 And wouldn’t you know it, beautiful blonde woman with a Swan wearing a crown was the poster for that 1950’s movie. Seems to depict the oppressive nature of how royal romances are more of a transaction than of genuine love. Not saying that some aren’t for love, it’s just not often that a royal will marry someone for love. Though I do believe that Kate and William in the UK did marry for love. I guess time will tell. 🙃 Ironically, Grace Kelly was courting her own prince while making The Swan. She met Prince Rainier during April 1955 Cannes Film Festival. By December that year, he proposed to her. Royals do work fast and this is usually down to external pressures in retaining their kingdoms. It was speculated that he was seeking a wife, as a treaty with France in 1918 stated that if he did not produce an heir to the throne, Monaco would revert to France. However this was neither confirmed nor denied. It was also rumoured he had an affair with three different women and the first was during Grace’s first pregnancy, but that was also neither confirmed or denied so we cannot say for sure whether it was a faithful marriage. 😕 Also ironically, that movie featured several eerie similarities to Kelly’s future. Her white lace costumes are quite similar to her wedding dress, and Alec Guinness who plays Prince Albert in The Swan, actually looks a great deal like Grace Kelly’s husband, Prince Rainier in this movie. 🤔 Interestingly enough, Grace Kelly actually did some work for ABC! Yes, she narrated ABC’s made-for-television film The Poppy is Also a Flower (1966). She and Rainier worked together in a 33-minute independent film called Rearranged in 1979, which received interest from ABC TV executives in 1982 after premiering in Monaco, on the condition that it be extended to an hour. Before more scenes could be shot, Kelly died and the film was never released or shown publicly again. Grace Kelly died in a car accident. The beautiful blonde princess lost control of her car after suffering a minor stroke that caused her to lose control of the vehicle. Her daughter, Stephanie, one of her three children, was in the car with her and she tried to regain control by taking the wheel after her mother lost consciousness, but failed to do so. Grace was alive but unconscious, with injuries to her brain, thorax and a femur fracture, she was in a coma on life support until the following day when Rainer decided to terminate the life support as doctors determined that she would not recover. Stephanie suffered bruising, concussion and a fracture to her spine. She didn’t attend her mother’s funeral due to these injuries. 😢😢😢😢😢😢😢 A tragic way for a princess to die, a tragic way for anyone to die really. Her life was cut short, so the happily ever after bit didn’t really happen for them. 😔😔😔😔😔😔 During her marriage to Rainer, Grace was not permitted to act anymore, a decision that Rainer himself imposed after an outcry in Monaco when Hitchcock offered Grace a part which would depict her fictional character as a kleptomaniac. So Grace had no choice but to decline Hitchcock’s offer. Despite acting being her dream and pleasure in life, the only way she could do it would be to divorce Rainer, which would mean leaving her three children in Monaco, and she would never do that. So she threw herself into her role as a princess and engaged in charitable work. Grace Kelly’s dream was to act and it had been her dream from being a very young child, much to her parents initial displeasure. However, her life changed, and she had to put not only her children and husband first, but the reputation of Monaco before herself too. She was no longer in a position to pursue her dreams. After her death, Rainer lived out his life, but never remarried and he is buried alongside her. ☹️ Most see Grace Kelly as this gorgeous blonde woman, who got lucky and married her own Prince Charming in a fairytale come true. But what I see is this whirlwind romance where a proposal was made after 8 months of not actually spending a lot of time together what with their individual commitments (particularly Grace’s as she was filming at the time). She accepted it meant that she had to give up her dreams, sadly her tragic death meant the apparent on the surface perfect fairytale (which it really wasn’t) ended prematurely to what a happily ever after is meant to be. Fairytales don’t end in tragedy. So I really find it somewhat interesting that Jennifer Morrison chose a Grace Kelly wedding dress of all the dresses she could have chosen. It will be interesting to see just how this pans out. 🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔 Follow the lady does not mean follow Emma into the canon plot spoiler that they don’t mind you seeing with blind faith that it will happen. The truth and the clues as to what will happen have already been shown to us, but you guys are too busy focusing on what they tell you to look at. It’s not the big obvious canon things where the truth is found, it’s in the details and the subtext, in the small things. Even in the things you believe are not canon because they haven’t been said. But what do I matter huh? I’m just a fan who ships SwanQueen and as YNB said once only canon ships are worth talking about 🙃 I wonder if that statement will still hold up after all of this is over, or whether Adam and Eddy’s storytelling will teach the lesson that just because something is canon, doesn’t mean it’s set in stone and that it always will be.

I've read this somewhere and i can't help but think about it a lot: do you think that the relationship of john-yoko and paul-linda are very similar, albeit manifested and viewed differently because of the people involved? like they're the inseparable, co-dependent type? and what do you think, if ever, does this say about the relationship of j/p? minimum 700 words, doubled space, 1 inch margin on all sides lol jk luv u

so this is literally one million years old and i apologize so much for that. honestly i’ve been trying to think of a way to frame my answer, because (as you all know by now) i try to give as balanced a point of view as i possibly can; in the interests of fairness i want to highlight anything that could be relevant. also, don’t joke about the double spacing. i’d probably do it, lmao!

here’s the thing. i don’t really think so. and the reason i say that is because you have to break down those respective relationships in two ways: 1. the way they manifested; and 2. the way they have been perceived. these are, whilst not diametric opposites, still intrinsic to way you can hope to analyse something like a personal relationship without falling into wild assumptions. i’ll use your two points of reference - inseparable and co-dependent - as a framework for this discussion.

on the first point: manifestation. john and yoko’s relationship was by definition public, and i don’t necessarily mean only in their new york existence with bed peace, et al., but their fight for kyoko, their constantly traveling around the world, gibraltar, and so on. paul and linda, by comparison, were relatively private, mainly towards the late 60s and the breakdown of the beatles and paul’s sadness beard and all that. john and yoko had reported drug dependence, they went to court. and yes paul was stuck for possession as well, but the narrative has been framed somewhat differently. not to get on too much of a tangent. but john reacted almost consistently with belligerence and - dare i say it - entitlement when it came to certain situations. paul was the diplomat, the one with the smooth cold smile and a degree of boyish candor that played very differently to wild john lennon who went off with an artist and had all these adventures. the way their relationships manifested was as much perpetuated by the media then as it has been in subsequent years - hence my second point: perception. 

john, even when he was a beatle, was the “clever” one, the tricky one, the bloke who always had a plain-speaking attitude to him that somewhat fascinated the media, who were more used to performers like paul. keep in mind i’m only talking about them from an outsider’s perspective - we know that paul could be canny and cruel just as much as john. but the difference is that when john/yoko and paul/linda manifest, the media already built boxes for them to fit into. their rivalry took on something of a mythology. an extension of that logic is that yoko represented an underdog (and i do think this is true): diminutive, artistic, strange, somewhat unearthly, steadfast by the troublesome john lennon. linda: the professional, an attractive white woman, divorced (but not scandalously so), american (not so great), a mother (bonus points: heather had a very public role in the paul/linda relationship whereas kyoko was somewhat mysterious [not least because she was busy being kidnapped]). on the same note, you cannot remove the aspect of race from this equation. yoko suffered horrendous racial slurs that continue to this day. there is an aspect of orientalism to the idea that yoko, “the bad one”, “lured” john away from the beatles. like.. she’s a woman, not an evil fairytale figure. i absolutely contend that the discussion/situation would be different were she a white woman. 

SO with all that in mind, that jumble of thoughts, i don’t think their relationships were similar. when you say co-dependent, do you mean linda’s presence in paul’s life to the point of joining the band? or the fact that they rarely spent a day apart? keep in mind that all of this is just me theorizing. but inasmuch as yoko was supportive of john, she also isolated him, they encouraged and enabled each other to take drugs, and they made a concentrated effort to remove themselves from society - they also, with some rare exceptions, did not have a child to look after; they were one unit. paul and linda, on the other hand, went to scotland in order to escape, however i don’t believe they refused to see people or to go down to london occasionally. they were also raising heather, who required a stable home life on account of being a child in need of support. there is also the question of energy. i do not deny that yoko was what john needed at a point in his life - i made a post a while ago defending her, because i do genuinely think yoko has been treated abysmally by the fandom and the public.

by energy i am circling back to the idea of media perception. linda and paul’s relationship has been framed by picturesque photographs of them in the countryside (and note what the countryside implies: fresh air, health, happiness, tradition - especially in the pastoral british mind). john and yoko were city dwellers, standing outside court, yoko a tiny little dark figure hovering by john as he sounds off about something or another, them in new york - america! what does that represent to the british mind? modernism, isolationism, the avant-garde. john and yoko were perceived as “other”: edgy, stylish, strange, artistic. paul and linda are tradition: white, happy, country-dwelling, supportive of each other. 

it’s impossible to know the realities of their relationships. we have fragments, and we can guess, but you really can’t detract the power the media and the beatle mythology has played into the framing of these two relationships. there is also the fact that posthumous recollection plays a powerful role. linda’s death, as a woman, a mother, a wife, is very different to john, martyred, murdered, genius. yoko is the grieving widow who has “sunk her claws” into “john’s estate” to “better herself”. paul is the grieving widower who had a very slow and public mourning period, but who did “move on” eventually. to this day people imply that yoko didn’t mourn john “enough” - not to mention the damaging fact that she shacked up with sam havadtoy very soon after. paul however appeared “genuine” in his grief. sex and gender play strongly in these two situations, as they have throughout the john/yoko and paul/linda dichotomy. they are presented as binary opposites: “good” and “bad”. the connection to the beatles also means that it can be revealing who you side with: the artistic yoko; or the independent linda. it’s akin to the “which beatle are you” magazine quizzes back in the 60s. it’s somewhat perverse.

i feel like i’ve said so much and yet nothing at all. i would like to discuss john/paul in perhaps another post? if you’re interested, let me know? but with regards to the john/yoko and paul/linda situation, i think they were presented as fundamentally different right from the beginning. right from the beginning. so we are only ever able to receive information that has been pre-filtered. we will never know the truth from the evidence we have. but by turning the evidence around, we can know that the way linda/yoko were portrayed says a lot about the culture of the 60s-80s; the media portrayal of women in relation to musicians; the role these women played in the break up of one of the world’s biggest bands; and the role they played in subsequent constructions of john and paul’s respective public identities and images. identities and images, it must be said, that were strong enough to resonate even through to today, to the point where we, in 2017, are debating the issue. that is some powerful media spin.