#he's got gay shit going on with a few of em but mostly Nathan. you know how it is with self insert ocs | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

amorremanet · 7 years

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Sorry if this is a weird question but Is Sebastian the only one of your OCs you have a fancast(?) for or are there more 👀

Well, he’s the one whose fancast is the most set in my mind, but that’s mostly a function of: 1. him being around the longest (since… this whole thing got started, originally, as me writing background for him when he was an RP character, so my DM could have more ammunition for future plots and/or character torture);

and 2. me going, “Kassie, no, do not imagine him looking like Hayden Christensen, istg” — which clearly worked out about as well as telling a goat to do your calculus homework, since going, “don’t do this thing” only made me continue thinking about it so much that it stuck

But some other fancast thoughts I’ve had are:

Todd initially looked like Aidan Turner, but that’s currently in a state of, “ehhhhh, not quite so much” — they still have a few things in common but not enough that I like the fancast anymore

I’m annoyed that Margot, in my head, looks basically like Scar*Jo in Ghost World, if she were about 4’11”, less skinny (like, Margot is in that irritating, “in-betweenie” body type where you’re not really thin, but you’re not fat, but your weight isn’t distributed in the right way for people to mean it in a nice way when they call you, “curvy”), and had black hair and glasses

I’m annoyed with this because I’m annoyed with Scar*Jo in general — but I’m mostly letting it go and hoping that someone else comes to mind, because the last time I fought myself too hard on fancasting these losers, I went, “No, stop it, no Hayden Christensen”…… and now Seb looks like Hayden Christensen, so?

Maybe if I don’t argue with myself too hard, Margot won’t look like Scar*Jo forever.

Lucy changes between Kat McNamara and Sophie Turner, because I really do like both of them for her.

That said, I wish I knew what either of them looks like with short hair, because the long hair works for a little while, but eventually, she’s going to cut it short (because if you’re going to run headlong into things where fights could ensue, then giving your hypothetical opponents something they can easily grab onto, like long hair, is a really bad idea)

(also because I personally find the idea of an eager beaver go-getting young autistic hemokinetic with short, bright red hair and no chill…… super cute)

For Sara Grace, I really love Asha Bromfield, who’s currently playing Melody Valentine on Riverdale

I am perpetually cranky that I don’t have a fancast for Pete, because I love him more than GRRM loves Jon Snow and Tyrion Lannister — and I initially thought of Karl “Manila Luzon” Westerberg, because Manila and Pete are both white/Filipinx biracial (and as I just found out, they are apparently the same height)…… but Manila’s skin is a few shades lighter than I see Pete’s, and their respective tones are pretty different, too

Convenient points of comparison: I see Pete’s skin tones and shades being closer to Bianca “Jiggly Caliente” Castro’s or Ryan “Ongina” Ong Palao’s (who are both also Filipinx, though not biracial afaik) than to Manila’s

Pete’s older brother Jimmy is closer to Manila in terms of shading, though their skin-tones are still different

I do know that Emerson, one of Pete’s cousins from his Dad’s side of the family, looks like Eddie Redmayne, but that’s just because Emerson used to be in a different project, and I moved him to this one, and he’s looked like Eddie Redmayne since, like, 2009.

He’s also a really secondary/tertiary character, so it’s kind of a cheap consolation prize to not having a fancast for Pete that makes me happy

Like, Emerson is not quite to, “I could replace him with an interesting lamp and have the same effect” levels, but he’s not a big deal.

I mean?? He’s Pete’s cousin. Both of them are the gay cousin, but Emerson is a gay Libertarian who works for the FBI and Pete is completely certain that he’s making up his alleged boyfriend because why would someone who sounds so cool and nice want to date Emerson

He’s not making up his boyfriend. But Pete’s enjoying himself in trying to prove that Emerson is making Asa up, just like how he made up two separate girlfriends before he accepted that he’s gay, and Pete’s had a pretty rough time of things in the past few years, and he really is Em’s favorite cousin, so Emerson figures he can let Pete enjoy the, “prove that Emerson’s boyfriend is a big conspiracy theory” thing until about Thanksgiving

But that’s beside the point, and seriously, about the most relevance that Emerson has is being Pete’s cousin and being employed by the FBI’s department of mutant shenanigans

Josie, once upon a time, looked like this goth model who I’ve never seen anywhere else but the face-claim suggestions/resources blog where I found the banner and icons that I used for Josie, back when they were a character in an all-dudeslash RPG because in those days, all-slash games were one of the only ways you could play any characters who weren’t 100% hetero without it being hella mocked and/or hella policed

—unfortunately, said goth model’s name is, “Aaron Gilmore” which makes him impossible to Google because there are a ton of people named, “Aaron Gilmore” and none of them has ever been the one I want, excepting the one of whom very few pictures actually exist

He’s also only good for Josie c. high school and undergrad, and?? idk, I kinda like Ben Whishaw, but I also have reasons why I don’t entirely like him for Josie

Another minor character whose face I know: Nick, who is Seb and Pete’s sponsor and Stephen’s boss, looks like Nathan Lane, and pretty much wandered into my head looking like Nathan Lane as soon as I decided that Seb and Pete’s sponsor existed, his name was Nick, and he has an art gallery

I’m kind of annoyed that I have no freaking clue where to start looking for Stephen’s fancast, but I’m also not surprised because he’s tall, and chubby, and a dork whose favorite colors are hot pink and acid green, and who laughs at his own jokes so much that he cannot finish telling the damn joke, and his Dad is black/white biracial while his Mom is Puerto Rican mestizx, and here we are

There is, to the surprise of absolutely no one, a side-character who looks like Tyler Posey. He… needs to be renamed, because I named him at like three in the morning and only just realized why I felt weird about him being named, “Rafael Delgado” (…because Melissa McCall’s maiden name is Delgado, and Scott’s blobfish-shaped gene donor was named Rafael, oh jeez)

—but anyway, he’s a member of the Wardens, who are “totally not” a middle finger to a lot of my issues with how Marvel has handled the X-Men over the years, and he teaches music at their attached school for “the gifted”

This wasn’t the first time that I did something like this, either.

For example: Pete has an ex-boyfriend, who is very much an, “I could replace him with an interesting lamp and it would be essentially the same”-level character. I named him Wade, first as a placeholder, and then I liked it so it stuck but something felt a little off about it

It took me about a month to remember that Spidey*pool is a Thing, and their civvies names are Peter and Wade, respectively, and ohhhhh, that’s why it felt weird…… well, shit. (Interesting Lamp Ex-Boyfriend has since been renamed Blake)

I also have “fancasts” for all of Sebastian’s dogs (Lola, Achilles, Angel, Oscar, Renly, Chewie, Toby, Biscuit, and Cat) and for Nick’s cat (Ms. Dorothy), but that literally just means, “I decided what breed I wanted Ms. Dorothy and Seb’s dogs to be, I went on Google Image Search, and I found the ones I liked the best, yay cute animals”

#nonny #ask box tag #that story with the mutants that i should find a working title for fml #*casually fancasts my own oc's because why not*#mine: writing #mine: asks #longish post//#Anonymous #sebastian moncrieff: mutant disaster #pete arden: dramatic disaster #margot gabriel: chainsmoking disaster #todd burroughs: art film disaster #lucy murphy: hemokinetic disaster #sara grace kelley #stephen gardener: precious disaster #josie quinn: empath disaster

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goarticletec-blog · 6 years

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A Lazy Person's Guide to the 2018 Winter Olympics

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A Lazy Person's Guide to the 2018 Winter Olympics

The Summer Olympics are not designed for the lazy person. It’s hard to feel good about yourself, lounging in a La-Z-Boy and crushing some beers, while nearly-nude specimens are sprinting by in a blur, their muscles rippling and gleaming with sweat.

That’s why the Winter Olympics are so swell. With all the athletes covered up in parkas, ski caps, and goggles, and it being freezing outside in most of the country, being a lazy ass is way more acceptable.

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Of course, the Winter Olympics is more esoteric than the Summer Games. There’s no running, jumping, or throwing shit—the general basis of athletic endeavor. The Winter Games are dominated by sports you’ve never even heard of, can’t believe are real—like, who the hell came up with skeleton?—or can’t afford to play anyway.

There’s no time to learn everything, so you’ll need a lazy person’s crash course to the two-week spectacle.

1. It’s being held in South Korea.

That’s the “good” one. (Although host city PyeongChang is just 50 miles from the demilitarized zone separating North and South Korea.)

2. They’ve hosted once before.

Ben Johnson before the start of the 100 meter semi-final in Seoul, South Korea, in 1988.

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That time it was the 1988 Summer Olympics in Seoul, 78 miles west of PyeongChang. It was the last-ever Olympics to include the Soviet Union and East Germany. That was also the Olympics that a ’roided-up Ben Johnson ran the 100 meters in, like, four seconds.

3. North Korea is participating.

The North and South Koreans formed a joint team. That should go smoothly.

4. Russia isn’t competing, though.

The Olympic Athletes of Russian during PyeongChang opening ceremonies.

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That’s because of mass doping allegations. Nevertheless, certain (clean) Russian athletes are competing. I know, it’s odd. They’ll march under a flag for OAR, Olympic Athletes of Russia.

5. It’s already tomorrow in PyeongChang.

South Korea is 14 hours ahead of the East Coast. That means whatever you are watching on primetime TV is probably live and NBC can’t do their typical bullshit where they edit taped events together like some reality show and then tease the one event you actually want to watch for three hours before airing it a few minutes before midnight.

6. The one U.S. Olympian you’ve probably heard of is still pretty good.

Many experts place Lindsey Vonn as the favorite in the women’s downhill, even though since the 2014 Olympics she’s severely fractured her humerus, suffered a major back injury, made Toni Lehren yell on Fox News (but who hasn’t?), and faced typical airlines nonsense to actually get to Korea.

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7. Oh wait, you’ve heard of Shaun White, too.

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Remember the Flying Tomato? He’s still pretty good at snowboarding and a contender in the halfpipe—despite the fact that late last year he crashed so badly he needed 62 stitches. Even if he doesn’t win, he’s worth $40 million, which will buy a lot of Mountain Dew Ice and legalized edibles.

8. Is that Bode Miller guy still around?

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No. Er, yes, but he’s now an NBC analyst. He’ll probably still figure out a way to clip a gate and crash.

9. Who is going to be the previously unknown U.S. darling of this Olympiad?

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Even after a poor start to his Olympics on Thursday night, 18-year-old figure skating prodigy Nathan Chen is your best bet to make it on a Wheaties box.

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10. The US Hockey team is not the Dream Team.

The Games have gone back to using non-NHL players for the first time since 1994. The U.S. team, made up mostly of washed-up former players like 39-year-old Brian Gionta, is not expected to medal.

11. Just like Ghostbusters, Cool Runnings is being remade with women.

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The Jamaicans sent a women’s team to compete in bobsled this year, and they’ll be driving a rental sled. Even if John Candy comes back from the dead to coach them, they are unlikely to make the podium. (Side note: The Montego Bay airport has a Cool Runnings-themed bar that plays the movie on a loop 24/7. Worth a visit!) Nigeria is also sending a women’s bobsled team to PyeongChang, making it the first African Olympic Team to compete in the sport.

12. Curling rules!

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Curlers wear blousey sweatshirts and ugly slacks and their sporting equipment is a damn broomstick. Yet somehow, this slow-moving sport is incredibly captivating and these curlers are still a ton more flexible than you are. Did you really think a bunch of Molson-guzzling Canadians would play something boring? Plus, for the first time, there’s “mixed doubles” curling this year.

13. Another cool first-time event is mass start speed skating.

It’s like a fucking roller derby on ice!

14. Yet the only event with guns is surprisingly boring.

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That’s biathlon. Cross-country ski for five kilometers, shoot a rifle at a still target, ski some more, shoot some more. So boring. Having said that, Susan Dunklee has a good shot to be the first U.S. Olympian to ever medal in the event.

15. Johnny Weir is still fabulous.

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The figure skating announcer is making Liberace look demure these days and continuing to infuriate the kinds of Twitter users who use Pepe the Frog as their avatar.

16. There’s an openly gay Olympian that refuses to meet Mike Pence.

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The vice president and his wife, Karen, are leading the US delegation in South Korea. Current US figure skater Adam Rippon, the first openly gay American to quality for the Games, made some remarks about Pence last month, telling USA Today: “You mean Mike Pence, the same Mike Pence that funded gay conversion therapy? I’m not buying it.” (The same Mike Pence who President Trump allegedly said wants to hang gay people.) Pence, however, really wants Rippon to know there’s no hard feelings.

.@Adaripp I want you to know we are FOR YOU. Don’t let fake news distract you. I am proud of you and ALL OF OUR GREAT athletes and my only hope for you and all of #TeamUSA is to bring home the gold. Go get ‘em!

— Vice President Mike Pence (@VP) February 8, 2018

17. The hunky Tongan is back.

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Remember Pita Taufatofua walking into the Rio 2016 Opening Ceremony looking like a bucket of Turtle Wax had been dumped over his torso? Well, guess what, he’s back for the Winter Games. He wasn’t particularly great at tae kwon do and he’s not particularly great at cross-country skiing either. As Tonga’s only Winter Olympian he was again their flag bearer and, even with temperatures below freezing in PyeongChang, he went shirtless. Don’t feel bad, he may have better abs, but in two weeks he’ll have the same numbers of Olympic medals as you.

18. The Olympic rivalry most likely to be made into an I, Tonya-like movie in 20 years.

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American Alpine skier Ted Ligety versus Austrian star Marcel Hirscher. Ligety got steamed when a giant slalom race, in Austria of all places, was canceled due to “inclement weather” (even though there wasn’t any) at the same time Hirscher was nursing an injury. Like any good American, Ligety went bonkers on Twitter, which is how we handle things these days as opposed to hiring mustachioed hitmen.

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Seems odd to have a race cancelled at 645am in Austria when their biggest star is temporarily out… 🤔

— Ted Ligety (@tedligety) October 29, 2017

19. No, the U.S. will not win the most overall medals.

Norway, Germany, or even Canada will. Yes, Trump will likely tweet-blame Democrats or undocumented immigrants for this, maybe both.

Aaron Goldfarb is the author of How to Fail: The Self-Hurt Guide, The Guide for a Single Man, and The Guide for a Single Woman. Follow him on Twitter.

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