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craneworms · 2 months

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thinking about transfem!sanji today. thinking about how she joins the straw hats hesitant to think about her gender. always pushing that nagging feeling and the sickness that he feels when he looks in the mirror and sees a body that doesn’t quite fit right far, far down. but now she’s on a boat full of queer and trans people and suddenly not thinking about it is a lot harder then previously.

she’s surrounded by people who are comfortable in themselves, in their skin, and able to express themselves in the way they want too. and (for reasons he’s still not ready to question) she’s jealous. she’s jealous seeing luffy live free, expressing exactly how feels in that moment. whether that means grass-stains and roughhousing on the deck or insisting than nami pulls his hair into pretty updoes and wearing long, flowing skirts that are ripped from use at the bottom — nobody questions it. he’s jealous of usopp and zoro being seen for exactly what they are without question or hesitation. she’s jealous that they have the body they want, mostly at least, at don’t seem to feel like they are living in a body that they don’t belong in.

she’s happy for her crew, of course! their happiness is his happiness, but it doesn’t stop the jealousy.

and then robin joins. robin who’s elegant and beautiful and smart and seems to see right through sanji’s denial with a single glance. sanji’s feelings when it comes to robin are very complicated. on one hand: she’s a very pretty and amazing woman and sanji can’t not be instantly enamoured with her. on the other hand: she’s a very pretty and amazing trans woman, and sanji’s almost ignorable feelings of jealousy increase tenfold when it comes to her.

it’s not directed at her, of course, or any of the crew. all that jealousy only festers inside of her, makes her feel chocked and constricted from the inside out. but she’s scared to stop and think about what it might mean, so it only gets worse and makes her feel angry, and kinda pathetic, at himself. because,, why is he letting something like that get to him so much. it’s not that he doesn’t support her crewmates, she swears !! it’s just,, hard to look at them without feeling that nagging, persistent feeling that something is terribly wrong sometimes.

and robin is the first of the crew to really push sanji towards accepting herself. it starts off small. she talks to sanji about her experience as a trans woman, rather than just observing his trans crewmates. and it’s not that sanji didn’t know that trans woman existed, it’s just talking to robin about her experiences, able to match up her thoughts and feelings with sanji’s in a way that he couldn’t do — didn’t allow himself to do — with the other strawhats, really solidifies that sanji could be a woman too.

and then robin starts to pull him into shopping with her, pointing out frilly clothes and dresses she thinks sanji would look good in. and she starts to teach her how to style long hair and do makeup under the guise of conversation. and then the other strawhats catch onto this and begin to subtly change their behaviour too. not enough that it would make her comfortable, just enough to give her room to explore herself, let him know that they support him.

nami insists on sanji being there for “girls talk”; usopp is open with sanji about his transition in an attempt to make her more comfortable; brook tells sanji of all types of people he’s met on his pirate journey (being trans is probably one of the least weird things happening on the grand line). luffy and zoro (lacking tact but meaning well) straight up ask her about it. neither of them are ones for subtly and also because their transition was a lot less denial and fumbling and a lot more straight forward, so sanji’s roundabout approach confuses them somewhat.

either way, the strawhats try and make sanji feel comfortable and it works, in a way. she still has a long way to go, but she’s began to take his first hesitant steps to finally accepting herself.

and then sabaody happens and sanji is sent to momoiro and she faces a lot about herself there, including finally accepting herself as transfem. and when she meets back up with his crew two long years later, she finally feels at peace with herself and her identity. and both her body and actions reflect that. she’s more confident in himself. he carries himself with an air of comfortability that he lacked before. and she has longer hair, pinned up in one of the styles robin taught him. slight softer features and a rounder figure that compliment her and her signature suits perfectly.

the crew easily accept sanji’s new look without much fuss. after all, everyone seems to have changed for the better throughout those two years, and it’s reflected on everyone. they make room for this new truth easily and it relives sanji so much. the only difference: sanji is a lot happier and everyone is a lot more open about treating him as a woman. and, sometimes, sanji catches robin looking at him with a knowing smile, seeming a lot prouder of sanji in a way the other members of the strawhats aren’t.

#one piece #sanji #black leg sanji #one piece sanji #transfem sanji #one piece robin #nico robin #trans nico robin #straw hats #straw hat crew #straw hat pirates #he/she prns used because i hc sanji as genderfluid #but you can read this as transwoman sanji as well really #this was supposed to focus solely around transfem!robin & transfem!sanji’s relationship but it got a bit out of hand

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dalvs-wife · 8 days

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boy who is goofy but tries to be cool x boy who is just unabashedly goofy

#ouhh hes rambling #hes so stupid. i need to shut him up quick #punching his mouth (with my mouth! gently!)#my art #doodles #selfship #selfship art #cap'n #deltarune #self insert #radio dork <3 #self insert uses she/it prns!!

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mynqzo · 7 months

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konstantine the gunslinger ! tried a simpler cartoonier style

#digital art #artists on tumblr #oc #digital aritst #original character #dnd #dnd oc #dnd art #dnd character #she/he/they prns for konnie

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moonsidesong · 1 year

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i ended up liking the agent 8 design i scribbled the other day so i drew them again witg a few minor changes teehee

14-crush’s “canon” isnt ever going to be developed much further than where it ended off so im just gonna preemptively mark the dlc as non-canon to Crush entirely. whatever horrifying thing happens to agent 8 in side order you can consider happened to this guy instead

#they/she/he prns for this beast i think #they dont care much Tho #14 crush #moonsideart #2023 #anyway crush8 is just hanging out with her homies at home forever i think thats just fine #splatoon

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groggygrimalkin · 3 months

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Hi I'm too lazy to make actual sprites for her rn, but here's Errant Mystic's derse attire! On Derse she was supposed to be a healer but his magic burns like hell so that kinda fell through

#im thinking he might be a witch of light #also EM goes by She/He prns she genuinly doesnt care who calls her what lol #my art #my ocs #carapacians #fanapace #perhaps

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beanghostprincess · 3 months

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Hi!

I just read a very funny fic 'Much ado about nothing' by Fire_lily and Violet_20 on AO3 and I was wondering... how do you think Sanji (and by the other guys) would behave when the girls are on their periods?

Okay, yeah, it was really funny. I often think about this, honestly, ngl. And you know how much I tend to write because I'm a menace to society, so I'll try to keep it brief. Btw, assume all the guys here are cis men (which hurts, because I'd rather die than say Usopp, Luffy and Zoro have dicks. But okay. Let's say they do) and that Nami is the only one in her period (because I think Robin is trans and also she has been dealing with pain so much on her own that even if she had her period, the crew wouldn't even notice. Nami, Franky, Jinbe, and Brook would be the only ones knowing).

Chopper is the one explaining what a period is, by the way, because these idiots know the basics but not much and I think they could use some health classes? Like, seriously, it'd be nice.

Luffy: Doesn't understand what the fuck is a period (Makino explained it. His ass didn't listen). If Nami is bleeding, can't Chopper cure her? Oh, he can't? Is she sick? Is she going to die? No? She's fine, then? But she needs them to give her a break because even if she isn't sick, she's still not going through the best time. It's uncomfortable and she feels bad and sensitive. I think Luffy would have a lot of questions and he would ask shamelessly about them. And he would also try to be considerate and share his food with Nami and cause less trouble. I know he's chaotic but he's always really nice when a crewmate is in pain, and if Nami (his navigator. His Nami!!!) is feeling bad, he'll do whatever he can to help her. If she has cramps he'll probably stay beside her and sleep with her and cuddle. He's actually worried sick even if she tells him she's fine.

Zoro: He doesn't really give a fuck. Kuina explained what periods were to him and how unfair it was and he agreed. It is unfair. It is fucked up. They shouldn't go through that. He respects Nami a lot for being able to work and yell and live normally while she's bleeding and cramping (I mean, that's HIS normal state, but Nami isn't like him). So he just supports her from a distance and if she needs anything he'll just try to help and that's it. He's like?? He's normal about it. Just a thing the body does. Everyone thinks it's such a big deal, but it's not.

Usopp: He grew up with Kaya. I don't need to say anything else. He's always complaining about Nami being louder than usual or oversensitive and saying that she doesn't need to blame them for being in pain, but he only says it because they're best friends, lmao. "Girl, I know you're in pain but it's not my fault. Chill. Do you want a chocolate bar?" and he's pretty much the only one allowed to keep her company when she's stressed and too angry to deal with the others. Bestie privileges. He knows how to make her happy. The perks of having a childhood sweetheart and taking care of her when she was on her period (she was just emotional, though, not like Nami who is a ticking time bomb depending on the month). He always has pads, pills, and distractions ready for Nami. He's just there and normal about it and helping her out.

Sanji: Fucking dramatic. I can't stand him. I'm gonna throw bricks at him. I love him, but he's either the most respectful gentleman on earth or the weirdest guy ever about this. He's probably both at the same time. He's SO annoying, oh my god. He keeps wanting to do everything for Nami, and okay, the food, tea, and extra snacks are fine. But it's just too much. He's the one crying all the time like "WHY DID GOD CURSE OUR MELLORINES WITH SUCH PAIN?????????? OH NAMI-SWAN IF I COULD TAKE YOUR SUFFERING I WOULD!!!!!! YOU ARE SO BRAVE FOR THIS!!!!!" and Usopp is the one actually throwing stuff at him and kicking him out of the girl's room when he comes to bring some snacks and won't shut up. He's,, Overly helpful. He has good intentions, really, but Nami is just on her period. She can still move and do her own things, thank you very much. I think he learns to be more normal about it with time, though. And he's just this way with Nami, probably (I say this bc I'm writing a Sanuso fic with Trans Usopp on his period and I swear Sanji is normal about it).

Chopper: I mean. It's the doctor. He keeps an eye on Nami and takes care of her. He's gentle and always tries to bring her painkillers if it's too much. Reminds her to drink a lot of water and eat properly but never too much because she could get sick! He's the cutest, gentlest thing ever.

Franky: Another dramatic man. He's just like Sanji, except that instead of crying because Nami has to go through this, he keeps saying she's SUPEERRRRR COOL AND STRONG FOR DEALING WITH THIS. But it's only for a few seconds and then he's just acting like a dad. Which includes helping if needed but then asking the weirdest questions to see if Nami is alright.

Brook: He would be the sweetest thing ever. But also, we gotta admit that he's still a perv and would ask to see Nami's underwear anyway. But leaving that aside, yeah, he's sweet. He offers tea and gentle music while she works and tries to be a gentleman. He makes a few jokes here and there, Nami hits him, the usual stuff. But he's a sweet grandpa so he's just there being nice. But, y'know, Brook is always nice to be around. He just offers his help more and often asks Nami if she's feeling okay.

Jinbe: He doesn't quite understand what he's supposed to do, but he just doesn't get in Nami's way if she's mad, and if she's sensitive he'll try to make the crew shut up for a while. Gentle older man. He always tries to make peace around the place, but pretty much like Brook and he also tries not to overstep. He asks Zoro if he should be doing something, and Zoro just shrugs and says to let Nami do her own thing.

#okay this is actually really sweet #gonna fix this and say luffy/zoro/usopp are trans to me and they have their periods too but yeah #also sanji is so obsessed with periods because they give him gender euphoria and envy he wants that so fucking bad #he constantly asks nami to describe how it feels like and she thinks he's being a perv but nope. he's just transfem any prns genderfluid #it's impossible for me to make this about robin okay it's just like ace. i can't picture them being cis. it's a nightmare to me.#one piece #cat burglar nami #strawhat pirates

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boywifesammy · 9 months

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imagine repressed & closeted transfem dean who never figures it out. imagine the sheer amount of guilt, fear, self-hatred and disgust he’d feel at what he is. big, clunky, dangerous. he takes comfort in his power, but it makes him feel sick. when he looks into the mirror and sees his hard edges, his body feels like it’s trying to rip open from the inside, yet he has no idea why.

dean plays his father’s wife until he dies. he takes care of sam and raises him as if he’s his own son. he’s a housewife in everything but reality. he desperately wants family, desperately wants to nurture, but his body isn’t built for that.

he’s taught by john and the world that he has to be strong. he has to be a man. he can never show emotion, because it’ll only be a weakness, and weakness is deadly. dean can never have a family because his body is wrong and he can never love like a woman because he cannot be weak.

so dean holds tight to those little moments of female connection with sam and his father like a dirty secret. he lays in bed at night and pretends he doesn’t think about being softer and lovelier. he stares at himself in motel mirrors until it makes him sick. he builds muscle and crops his hair short because this thing inside of him terrifies the hell out of him and he has to do anything to keep it at bay.

women comment on his looks a lot. when he’s young, they call him pretty, beautiful, gorgeous. they compliment his soft green eyes and plush lips and spattering of freckles. secretly, dean loves it. it makes that thing inside of him flare up in joy, which is why he knows that this is dangerous, and not something to be indulged. he stays up at night obsessing. shaves every morning and runs his fingers over his soft cheeks, flutters his long eye lashes, tries to find the soft edges of his cheekbones.

this thing is slowly eating away at him. the closer he gets to it the more volatile he feels. he jerks off under the blankets with a hand over his mouth to stifle the gasping, whimpery sounds he makes. the sound of his own voice scares him. his throat chokes up when a guy hits on him and john gives him a glare. one time he puts a finger up his ass and comes so hard that he sees stars, not because of the stimulation, but just from the idea of being wet and slick and pliant between his legs.

dean loves women and it makes him feel sick to the very core. he wishes that he loved women in a normal way. instead, he sees their curvy bodies and an awful, disgusting mixture of greed-lust-jealousy rocks through him. it’s all a strange, roundabout way of wrecking himself, because it’s extremely easy to play the role they want him to play, but god if it doesn’t hurt like hell.

dean loves fucking women. he’s desperate in bed but he’s always sure to be gentle with his thrusts. it makes him feel less disgusting. he likes shoving his face into a chick’s pussy, eating her out until she’s dripping, or nuzzling into the crook of her neck as he fucks her wet cunt. he likes listening to their gasping whines and moans. the feeling of it all makes his teeth clench with guilt; her cunt on his dick, his strong thighs, the way she keeps moaning his name. but it’s so easy to pretend in moments like these.

dean puts his face into her hair, and smells her citrus shampoo as she wails out cries. he doesn’t imagine being her, but he focuses on her noises, on the softness of her body and the wetness of her pussy. he always cums silently, his entire body quivering and shaking, because he’s too scared of the noise that’d come out of his mouth if he opened it.

when rhonda hurley makes him wear her panties, he nearly throws up on her carpet from how hard his heart is beating. they’re silky on his dick. rhonda calls him pretty, beautiful, she strokes at his flaccid penis through the panties and kisses messy lines up his belly. dean is hard and shivering by the end of her teasing, leaking through the panties and flushed from head to toe.

rhonda is both the best fuck that dean ever has and his worst fears coming to life. she calls him good girl as he fucks her. it ends embarrassingly early. when dean cums, it’s with a gasping cry of her name and a girly little keen that haunts his nightmares. he doesn’t remember ever cumming so hard in his life. he shook with aftershocks for minutes after, dazed and disgusted with himself.

rhonda gives dean her number. he never calls her back. after dean leaves that town, he burns the panties and stops shaving his stubble so short. memories of rhonda make him angry. he sinks into hunting and drinks until he’s cross-eyed. dean takes solace in the horror of violence. he bathes himself in that disgust and he feels right at home in the middle of it.

sometimes, dean can’t sleep at night from how sick he feels. he tries to figure out why, but he can’t place the reason. it eats him up inside. makes him feel like a monster. he thinks that he may just be a disgusting freak of a man.

as dean gets older the comments about him getting pretty melt away. he knows he’s objectively extremely attractive, in a male model sort of way, but it doesn’t match up with the images in his head.

the thoughts get more and more humiliating as time goes on. he’s not a twink anymore and he can’t be fantasizing about being fem, but he can’t stop it. he stays up at night itching in his own skin, brutally aware that he’d look hideous and disgusting in anything girly. his body is too big and bulky. he’s a freak for being into that sort of thing.

dean eventually admits to himself that he might be a little gay. he keeps it on the dl, visits gay bars when they hit more liberal cities, and doesn’t ever repeat the same place. he likes being dressed up and bent over. he chalks it all up to a crossdressing fetish, and while that’s humiliating and sickening, it’s easier than having to deal with whatever it is that’s going on with him.

dean aches inside perpetually because he is flawed. he wants to hold his child in his arms and wear dresses and flirt shamelessly with men. he knows he’s a freak for it but he’s accepted that he’s going to perpetually live with this pain.

he gets older and older and the dysphoria gets so fucking bad that he can’t even look in the mirror anymore, but it doesn’t matter at this point. he’s completely disconnected himself from his body. he’s a sick, perverted freak in the body of a man and none of it feels right. he uses his body like a tool, a weapon, and he purposefully keeps it masculine and well-toned to push back any illusions that he’s anything but a man.

and sometimes, he’ll go to gay bars and let himself get railed to incoherence. he’ll drive three towns over while sam’s asleep and put on his makeup in an alleyway nearby. he always looks for men bigger than him. men who’ll call him pretty and beautiful and treat his ass like a cunt.

and if he’s lucky, maybe they’ll let some other words slip. maybe they’ll call him babygirl or darling or play with his pecs like tits as they pound him deep. and sometimes, if he’s really lucky, he’ll get to wear something pink and lacy. sheer panties. a bralet. stockings or a necklace.

he always cums in the first few minutes on those nights. he doesn’t mind being fucked until the other guy finishes, as long as he keeps calling him a good girl for taking it.

dean always throws up in the club bathroom afterwards. he spends hours wiping off all the makeup from his face and sleeps in the impala for the night. he gives himself another wipe the morning after and tells sam that he was out with a one night stand. it technically isn’t a lie.

one time, sam makes a joke about dean being a woman. he pushes. he calls him a pretty lady, and dean is horrified when his eyes wet a bit at it. he can’t take it. he starts the fight, but sam wins it. he pins dean down and starts to yell at him. then he sees that dean is crying. he isn’t making any noise or shaking, but his cheeks are wet.

don’t, is all he says. it hurts like hell to get out. sam seems confused, but he doesn’t question it. he doesn’t make the joke again. dean forgets about the whole thing and pretends he doesn’t feel the weird looks sam sends him sometimes.

dean dies like that, alone and angry, in a body that’s all hard edges and grief and hatred.

he’s the same in heaven. he can’t imagine being any other way. he doesn’t even know what he wants, what would make him happy. most days, he’s happy with driving his impala aimlessly, drinking while watching sunsets and tuning into the world around him. thinking, and thinking, and thinking. about rhonda hurley and her satin panties and his father and the soft, warm thing buried inside of him.

dean doesn’t know why he feels sick inside when he looks at himself, but he’s too broken to ever figure it out. the only thing that he knows is that he doesn’t feel guilt the same in heaven. that means that when he has those strange dreams of warm kisses, strong arms around his tiny waist, and the warm, beating heat of his child’s heart against his own pillowed chest, he can spend some time in bed in the morning trying to recollect the memories without hating himself for it.

#oc #supernatural #spn meta #transfem dean winchester #mtf dean winchester #sam winchester #character analysis #trans headcanon #me ramblibg incoherently again about tbe nuance and intricacy of trans winchesters #this ended up WAYYY longer than i intended #but god my heart HURTS just thinking about her #transfem dean is so uniquely devastating she tears me up inside #i use he/him prns for her here because it works better with context #and she never actually comes to terms with her gender #but god i love her to bits she’s my little girlie

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