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#he will join CoS party very soon which is going to be...fun
jazzkolart · 2 years
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I’ve finally made a centaur DnD oc. He’s the biggest most insecure narcissistic cleric/fighter noble to ever exist and i adore him.
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AU - Canon Divergence (2) Masterlist
part one
a night to remember (ao3) - calvinahobbes
Summary: Why did he think going anywhere alone would be a good idea? And to an honest to god queer prom for sad grown-ups who missed out the first time around because they were too busy being closeted.
Bittersweet (ao3) - heylazeh
Summary: “Do you believe that there's another world at the other side of the mirror where everyone is opposite?”
“No.”
“Watch out"
dan and philly's wet moments (ao3) - heartsopenminds
Summary: Phil loathes hiring people to come and fix stuff around the house - he never imagined that watching someone power washing a patio could be so much fun though.
dan is not a pianist (ao3) - Marranje
Summary: How Phil went from watching the pianist and youtuber Dan from afar to being by his side through the most important moments of their lives.
Disturb the Universe (ao3) - iihappydaysii
Summary: Dan and Phil are a successful YouTube duo, best friends and next door neighbors. Phil's married with two kids and Dan's long term boyfriend is like the queen's cousin or something. Their lives are fine--perfectly acceptable--but when two unrelated emergencies land Dan and Phil living together for the first time since 2012, they're forced to examine the choices they've made and confront the feelings they've kept quiet for nearly a decade.
Drips Through (ao3) - artbabe
Summary: Dan goes outside to smoke at a party. Phil joins him.
drop your heart I'll save it for you (ao3) - Anonymous
Summary: Tenderness isn't part of the deal, nor are soft words, or feelings, or kisses that don't lead to fucking. It's not what Dan asked for, and it's certainly not why someone would choose to fuck their friend slash flatmate slash colleague who they absolutely don’t have any feelings for.
Equilibrium (ao3) - phan_anon
Summary: It's 2016, and Omega!Dan doesn't need an Alpha to be happy, thank you very much. He's quite content living with best friend, flat mate, business partner, co-author, ex-boyfriend, and occasional lover, Beta!Phil. Quite content, that is, until an unplanned pregnancy disturbs the comfortable equilibrium they've established over the years...
from up here you can't beat the view (just watch me now) (ao3) - kishere, maybeformepersonally
Summary: It's 2009 and Dan finds Phil on the internet when a well-meaning mate of his recommends him to a certain site she likes. Dan quickly becomes a fan: watching Phil's videos religiously and interacting with him on his socials. And, soon enough, Phil starts noticing him.
A familiar enough story on the surface but here's the catch: Phil has never been involved with YouTube.
Phil is a camboy.
Guilty Pleasure (ao3) - ThoughtaThought
Summary: Dan and Phil meet at a BDSM club and decide to play. Dan is a rigger and a masochist. Phil is a sadist and a rope bunny. It’s perfect.
hard launch at last (ao3) - calvinahobbes
Summary: “Maybe the exact right moment won’t ever present itself.” Dan can feel himself hurtling towards some cosmic revelation as they stand here on a sandy beach in Portugal, the ocean bringing out the blue in Phil’s eyes.
I try to picture me without you but I can't (ao3) - Anonymous
Summary: After Dan's tragic death, Phil starts having a bunch of strange dreams where he is still alive. But are they really just dreams?
Or: Phil's s̶o̶u̶l̶ consciousness can't cope with Dan's death, so he starts hopping between different universes to look for him.
more than convenient (ao3) - baroquen
Summary: Based on a Tumblr post.
In which Dan keeps seeing Phil as the closest profile on Grindr and finally says "fuck it."
(Except it's very sappy)
nylon is for delicate work (ao3) - Anonymous
Summary: A forensic linguist meets a lawyer in Rawtenstall.
re: the apple store guy...IT ALL WORKED OUT! (ao3) - strange_highs_and_strange_lowss
Summary: Based on a craiglist "best of" posting. Apple Store customers Dan and Phil frequent the "missed communications" page. The world's most coincidental first date follows.
rocks wishing to be clouds (ao3) - catboyhowell (bloodyscarab) (ao3) - pinkseason
Summary: i'm a loose bolt of a complete machine. what a match, i'm half-doomed, and you're semi-sweet. - a story about kidnapper voicemails, habitual insecurity, and conversations within conversations.
Tried to do headstands for you (every time I fell on you) (ao3) - popsongnation
Summary: “I’m not always this clumsy and accident prone, I swear,” Dan says, and maybe he’s lying, but Phil doesn’t have to know that. How hard can it be not to injure yourself at a coffee shop? He just needs to remember which way the doors open, and buy new shoes. He’ll be fine.
Or: coffee shop/uni AU in which Dan keeps injuring himself in increasingly ridiculous ways, Phil regularly has to patch him up, and it’s Christmas time.
Two Man Team (ao3) - Nefertiti1052 (Succubusphan)
Summary: This is the story of two struggling friends who after many trials and tribulations find their way back to each other and build the life they've always dreamed of.
Or how Phil changed his life by talking to random strangers on the internet.
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Comfort Food
Summary:  After horrible weeks, Robin Locksley and Regina Mills both reach for the last box of mac and cheese at the store. They decide to share it and find it is the start of a beautiful relationship. This relationship is explored in a series of one-shots. Outlaw Queen AU.
Part I: FFN | AO3 | Wattpad
Part XXXIV: Holidays and Grief
FFN | AO3 | Wattpad
Excerpt: 
Robin wanted Henry's first Halloween to be perfect.
He knew that his son was too young to remember it – he was barely three months old now. This was all for him and Regina reminded him not to put too much pressure on himself, which was likely something he would have to say to her once Christmas rolled around. But he had looked forward to sharing his favorite holiday with his children and so Robin was going to start as soon as possible.
Though he would agree that maybe Henry didn't need five different costumes for Halloween. But Robin hadn't been able to choose in the store so he figured it wouldn't hurt and they would find a reason for Henry to wear them all at some point.
Which was true for Henry's two-month pictures. Regina decided that they should do a Halloween theme for them to honor Robin's favorite holiday and they dressed Henry in the little vampire costume they had found. Henry slept through most of the pictures but when he was awake, he seemed very fascinated by the cape and the Halloween decorations.
Robin considered that a win.
Mary Margaret and David also had a woodland creature theme for their annual Halloween party, now also adjusted for children. Regina figured it was just an excuse for her friend to wear her Snow White costume again (which was proven true) but Robin was more focused on them going as bears. He worked with Regina and they ended up winning a family prize thanks to their adorable Baby Bear.
He then dressed Henry up in the bumblebee costume and brought the baby to his workplace. Everyone crowded around Robin and Henry, cooing over how adorable he looked in his costume. A picture of Henry in his costume soon joined the other pictures on their bulletin board, right next to the one of him in his Sherwood onesie.
By the time Halloween rolled around, there were then two costumes Robin hadn't used yet – pumpkin and dragon. He laid them on the dresser in the nursery, looking between them. The pumpkin costume was very traditional but the dragon one was a fun costume. So which way did he want to go for Henry's first time trick or treating?
"Can I make a suggestion?" Regina asked, wrapping her arms around him from behind and resting her chin on his shoulder.
"Of course," he said. While Halloween was his holiday, he still wanted her feedback just as he hoped she would want his when Christmas rolled around.
She pointed to the pumpkin costume. "I think I want to use that for his three-month pictures. Make him the centerpiece of a cornucopia rather than dressing him as a pilgrim or a turkey."
"I think that would be a great idea," he replied, holding up the dragon costume. "So Henry will go trick or treating as a dragon."
"He's going to be the cutest dragon ever," she said, kissing his cheek. "And we're going to enjoy his haul."
Robin chuckled. "Yes, we are."
She then patted his chest. "So, Henry is asleep. What do you say to a cuddle on the couch with two glasses of wine?"
"I say hell yeah," he said, setting the costumes down. "Lead the way, milady."
Regina took his hand and led him out of the nursery. They walked downstairs together and into the living room. She released his hand, kissing his cheek. "Why don't you light a fire and I'll go get the wine?"
"Sounds good to me," he said. They parted ways and he went to the fireplace as Queen left her bed, walking over to him. He chuckled, scratching behind her ear. "Come to help Daddy?"
Her Majesty let out a little bark before sitting by his side, watching as he lit the fire. Once it was going, he placed the cover back on it and stood. Robin looked down at Queen, motioning for her to follow him. "Come on, girl."
Queen jumped up onto her favorite armchair, curling up on it. Robin chuckled as he pulled down the blanket he and Regina kept on the couch in the colder months, unfolding it and shaking it out as Regina returned with two glasses of wine. "Here we go," she said, handing him one.
"Thank you," he said, motioning to the couch. "Make yourself comfortable."
She nodded, sitting down and then pulling her legs up to tuck them under her body. He sat next to her, also pulling his legs up until he was lounging on the couch with her. Robin covered them with the blanket before tapping his glass against hers. "Cheers."
"Cheers," she said, sipping her wine. "I love quiet nights like this."
"Me too," he replied, setting his glass down so he could wrap both his arms around her. "I think we're going to appreciate the quiet even more soon."
She chuckled. "Henry is barely three months old. We have time before he starts making noises and talking all the time."
"That is true," he agreed, resting his cheek against her hair. "I guess I shouldn't speed up time, huh?"
"Please don't," she said. "I want to enjoy this time with Henry, even if we're exhausted most of the time. It's all about him and being his parents."
Joy spread through him as he kissed the top of her head. "I love being Henry's dad and sharing everything with him for the first time."
"I know," she said, chuckling. "You've made it very clear about Halloween."
"Like you're going to be any different about Christmas?" he asked her, teasing her.
She paused before chuckling as well. "That's true. I'm going to make this one of the best Christmases ever, though not just because of Henry."
Regina grew quiet as she turned away from him, a faraway look in her eyes. He continued to hold her, knowing she was thinking of her father. This would be their first Christmas without the older Henry and he knew the older man's absence was going to be acutely felt by all of them at some point in the next three months. Robin himself still sent pictures of Henry in his costumes to the group chat that included his mother and grandparents as well as Cora, Granny and Henry. No one had turned off Henry's phone service and surrendered his number back to the company. For now, it almost felt like Henry could still see the pictures of his namesake and grandson.
Henry would've loved them.
"It's okay to be sad," Robin reminded her softly. "And we're allowed to be happy. Your father would've wanted that for us."
"I know," she said, resting her head on his shoulder. "I just miss him. And then on top of that, I'm worried about my mother. I don't think she's coping with her grief as well as she wants us to believe."
He sighed, thinking of how Cora had been acting lately. "I know. I agree with you."
"So does Granny and Ruby," she replied. "The only one who doesn't is Mother. And she refuses to even talk about it let alone deny it."
"Doesn't mean she isn't in denial," he said, thinking back to the talk they had with Archie after a concerning incident with Cora.
They had had a small gathering to introduce their friends to Henry. Cora hadn't been herself that day – she usually was a social butterfly and often flitted around a room to talk with everyone. Instead, she had been withdrawn and they often had to go looking for her. Often they found her somewhere doing some sort of chore – folding clean laundry Regina had left for after the party, cleaning the upstairs bathroom, even doing the dishes before the party was over. Each time, someone would try to guide her back to the party and away from whatever distraction she had found for herself.
Concerned, Regina and Robin invited Archie over to see if they could get some insight from him. He spoke to them about the grief process, including the five stages of grief. Archie warned them that people didn't experience the stages in the same order and could experienced the same stage over and over again. At one point, he explained that grief was like a ball in a box with a button. Sometimes the ball was big and constantly hitting that button so the person was constantly experiencing grief. Other times, the ball was smaller and only hit the button every so often. He explained the ball generally shrunk over time but that it could grow again without warning. It was a process that would likely last them the rest of their lives but that the first year would likely be the toughest.
Archie was helping both Regina and Robin process their grief over her father's death especially as it was coupled with the joyous event of Henry's birth. But they weren't sure if anyone was helping Cora, which did not surprise Archie. He noted that doctors often made the worst patients and it was true of psychologists as well. That Cora could feel that she knew how to help herself and therefore wasn't talking to anyone. Archie encouraged them to be there for Cora and to create a safe space where she could hopefully open up about her feelings. He wasn't overly concerned about her behavior at the party but asked them to inform him if her behavior grew more troubling or was possibly harmful.
"As I said when we met with Archie, I will follow your lead," Robin reminded her now, rubbing her arm. "I will give you and your mother whatever support is needed."
She leaned closer, kissing his cheek. "Thank you. I think for now we just need to support my mother but not push her or gang up on her."
He nodded. "I know. I remember what Archie said. We just need to be there for each other and make sure we're coping in ways that aren't ultimately dangerous. Right now, your mother's coping mechanism may not be particularly healthy but it's relatively harmless."
"I understand it," she agreed. "There are some days I want to lock myself in our room and cry. But I don't because Henry needs me."
"You can always let me know if you need a good cry and I can take care of Henry. I don't want you to bottle up and hide your emotions like I did," he replied, thinking of the night he had broken down in their yard while she had held him.
She let out a soft chuckle before nodding. "I will. Thank you. And I want you to do the same with me, okay?"
He nodded. "Okay."
"Good," she said, giving him a quick kiss. "Now, can we change the subject? I would like to relax before bed."
"Same," he replied, setting his glass down. He ran his fingers through her hair as his gaze locked on her lips. "I think I know a good way to relax."
Regina bit her lip. "I think I do too."
Once she set her own glass down, Robin wrapped his arms around her and kissed her. She returned it eagerly as they laid on the couch, exchanging long kisses. Regina pressed herself against him and he felt his cock twitch. It had been weeks since the last time they had sex but there wasn't enough time to themselves with Henry now home. Soon he would be old enough for them to start trusting him with a babysitter for a few hours and they could get away for some time to themselves. For now, though, he was more than content for stolen moments like this with his wife. Bonding with Henry and caring for him was more important than his own physical needs as far as Robin was concerned.
And he knew that Regina felt the same way.
They had waited this long to be parents and could wait even longer to have sex again as long as they had their son.
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anhed-nia · 1 year
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BLOGTOBER 10/29/2022: THE SENTINEL (1977)
First of all, there should be some kind of law that says you can't have Burgess Meredith and William Hickey in the same movie. It could be for the same reason they're not allowed to sell eggnogg year round; it's just too much of something.
Now, with that out of the way: Michael Winner's THE SENTINEL is a pretty good movie full of pretty great people—even its cast of extras is surprisingly star-studded—but with a bummer finale that makes a lot of sense if you're aware of the filmmaker's reputation for being an asshole. Venerated horror scholar Robin Wood called the movie "the worst—most offensive and repressive—horror film of the 70s," which, if you're me, means you absolutely have to see it. Also if you're me, you might wonder what all the hyperbole is about until the very end.
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Arriving in 1977 and clearly wishing to join the dwindling party started by ROSEMARY'S BABY, THE EXORCIST, and THE OMEN, THE SENTINEL concerns a young model who will suffer a bizarre punishment for wanting a little more independence. Allison (Cristina Raines) is leery of moving in with her morally ambiguous lawyer boyfriend Michael (Chris Sarandon), as she still feels icky about the recent, convenient death of Michael's wife. That's not the only thing bugging Allison, though; she was recently released from a mental institution, and is haunted by the ghost (figuratively and perhaps even literally) of her debaucherous father. She figures she just needs a little time and space in which to learn to stand on her own two feet again, and she finds the worst place to do it in a handsome Brooklyn brownstone populated by devilish oddballs (including Burgess Meredith, Sylvia Miles, John Carradine, and…there's just more familiar faces in this movie than I have the energy to name). When Allison realizes she's not going to get the peace of mind she hoped for, she complains to her broker (Ava Gardner), only to learn that she is supposedly alone in the building, and that her struggle with insanity may not be over. Either that, or she's being embroiled in a battle between good and evil that it will take a lot of convoluted investigation to sort out.
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THE SENTINEL has a lot of moving parts; co-writer Jeffrey Konvitz adapted his own novel for the screen, and it's easy to imagine that this frenetic narrative may hold together better within the more generous bounds of a book. However, despite all the overly involved infernal intrigue, the film is pretty watchable just due to its collection of kooky performances and its amusingly sleazy set pieces. It's basically all fun and games up to the end, when Michael Winner makes a choice that is hard to sit with by casting real people with extreme disabilities and deformities as demons from hell.
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This notorious Boschian finale is admittedly frightening and effective, but as soon as you realize that not much of what you see is a special effect, your experience changes. Personally, it takes me out of the movie, and sends me spiraling into the vortex of debating whether exploitative freak shows should be banned outright, or whether people with unusual or pathological appearances should be allowed to capitalize on their situation however they see fit. This is pretty far outside the realm of the campy romp I thought I was in for, and to call it "insensitive" feels like a comical understatement. I don't know what Michael Winner was thinking when he decided to do this, but for someone with his reputation for being cruel, intolerant, and abusive, hearing his perspective probably wouldn't be overly eye-opening.
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What's the moral of the story of this movie? I'm not entirely sure, but it has certainly earned its place in horror history as an item that we probably won't stop talking about any time soon. It is definitely something to see, and fun while the fun lasts, but be prepared to do a lot of soul-searching after the credits roll.
PS Just to sort of counterbalance the effect of talking about this much-discussed movie, I want to point out a film starring people with unusual appearances that attempts to deliver a more positive, albeit even more challenging message: 2018's HAPPY FACE, in which an attractive teenage boy secretly infiltrates a support group for people with severe deformities, as a way of gaining a better understanding his mother, who has been disfigured by cancer. Because of its sincerity and realism, HAPPY FACE can be much harder to take than THE SENTINEL, but I dunno, maybe everyone should have to see it:
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searchgreys · 1 year
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New gawker
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NEW GAWKER PLUS
(Certainly Gawker founder Nick Denton’s ever-changing whims were an elephant clearly stalking the room on this front.) When I asked what he thought of the site so far, he said, “It’s better than what I thought it would be at launch.” “Their focus is to make it really fucking good.” We both noted that most publications don’t enjoy this kind of mandate from their CEO. “This is all about patience, patience, patience,” he told me when I asked how Gawker was planning to make money. officially turned on the lights? Finnegan has hinted at potential investigative pieces the staff have in the works.Ĭrucially, Goldberg seems at least more than happy to continue the waiting game he’s played since acquiring the Gawker I.P. Would it shock you, media-obsessive reader, to learn that it’s really only been about a month since Finnegan and co. Pleasant niceties and Prince Street pizza aside (the waitstaff began circulating whole pies once the hors d’oeuvres ran out, which felt at odds with the fact that the space was maybe at 40% capacity at its busiest), perhaps the ultimate source of good vibes for the night was the sense that New Gawker still had time to prove itself. “Gawker’s been such a psychological force in my life for so long,” she said in the bemused manner of someone waiting graciously to blow out their birthday candles. Asked if it’s a lot of pressure to be synonymous with the site, she told me that she simply found it funny. “I don’t want to jinx it, but we’re having a lot of fun,” Finnegan told me later, pointing to recent posts on The White Lotus and panda babies as some of her New Gawker favorites thus far. ( Vanity Fair’s very much included.) New senior Gawker editor George Civeris, who described the new team as “a comedy writers room, but better” waxed wistful over how he used to type g into his browser and get it autofilled to Gawker. Judging by the reverential tones at hand, you’d be forgiven for assuming some were discussing a centuries-old journalistic tradition, not a website that only stopped publishing five years ago-though the media class’s obsession never really ended. As we plucked at tiny cones of french fries, Adweek reporter Mark Stenberg mused over the evening’s historic potential, or at least the chance to be “part of a journalism myth or a legend,” which prompted Terry Nguyen, of Vox’s The Goods, to inform him that he was going to sound “too corny,” which was overall par for the course for the way most of the evening’s attendees seemed to be grappling with Gawker nostalgia. On the terrace, one-time Wing boss Audrey Gelman appeared to be in deep discussion with another Times media reporter, Michael Grynbaum. The crowd was a veritable Escher staircase of New York online media. They were both soon to be joined by former Gawker writer J.K. “It needs to fill up a little.” Near the entrance, he was chatting with New York Times media columnist Ben Smith, who published the findings of his Santa cosplay on New Gawker’s potential naughty-to-nice ratio earlier this week. “I’m a harsh critic of parties,” he told me as he shifted continuously on his feet. Looking around at the clusters of media types talking quietly amongst themselves, it seemed he’d be disappointed.Įven Bryan Goldberg, founder of Bustle Digital Group, former Gawker 1.0 punching bag, and the lucky masochist who then acquired Gawker at a 2018 bankruptcy auction, seemed antsy.
NEW GAWKER PLUS
My plus one for the evening-a former Gawker editor who refuses to be named because he has grown sick of giving any other quotes about Gawker-announced he was simply here for the booze and the spectacle, the latter so often a given for Old Gawker. Between the breezy terrace, the hanging baskets of something vine-y swaying in the puffy humidity, the circulation of mini cheeseburgers and Waldorf salad bites, the resulting effect resembled less of a gossip-flush media party than that of a work friend’s tasteful wedding reception. The vibe was-as strange as it is to evoke the kind of Midtown power lunches Old Gawker might have guzzled for breakfast- swanky: Whatever intimidating holdover halo effect ye olde Gawker mythology foretold quickly collapsed into a passive appreciation for the conventionally hotel chic choice of setting. A media launch party in Manhattan, in the fall of 2021, in this economy? In these epidemiological conditions? And yet Wednesday night at the Bowery Terrace, there gathered one extremely online cadre in honor of the long-awaited official relaunch of Gawker- The Third, now helmed by its former features editor and preeminent all-hands-meeting live-tweeter Leah Finnegan-wondering if perhaps it was all a sign that things were veering a little closer back to normal again, if that’s even still the goal.
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lavalamplana · 2 years
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Phases
I’ve met someone new. I don’t want it to be serious. He calls me Princess, I like it. I’m not ready to do anything serious. Not right now. I have too many things that I want to do. Sex is fun with him though. I’m glad I’ve decided to try out different partners. I wanna enjoy being single, however. I don’t want to be tied down to someone. I want to be able to go out and mess with whoever I want, kiss whoever I want, talk to whoever I want. None of that equates to a committed relationship. I am going to start my new job on my birthday. I got the offer letter, FINALLY today. My friends and I are planning something to do for my birthday, it’ll be the first one I’ve celebrated with friends in 2 years. I love to party. I love being around my people. I think my friend Nik and I are going to join an indoor co-ed soccer league. Or I might join a pickle ball league with my friend Carol. It’s so nice to make plans with friends again and have a place to be and people to see. I’m finally getting my new space put together. Tomorrow I plan to break down the last boxes, and trash and donate the last things that need to go. I’m going to visit the storage unit and put the rest of my things away. I’m going to my friend Glenn’s bridal party meeting Saturday. I’m excited to see how everything will work. It will give me something to look forward to and another reason to work out and save money. I’ve been going to the gym every morning, my body is very sore. I love the feeling though. I love how working out makes me feel. I feel powerful and like I’ve accomplished something. It’s a great way to start my days. I need to get my haircut. I have so many dead ends. I plan on meeting with my new therapist in August. I have much to hash out and I’m excited to do so. I don’t feel as fucked up anymore, things are beginning to fall in order in my head. Stability feels boring but so much more peaceful. I haven’t had real peace in so long. The kind that comes from the inside and is completely fulfilling. You don’t need anything else, because your needs are met by yourself. I want to look through my past with some guidance though and figure out the last bits and pieces. I feel like I have all of this information in front of me but it’s scattered. And there’s so much of it. However, I’ve made an extensive list. I’m going to print it out and bring it to my therapist and ask if she is capable of my task. It’s very type A, I know. But I’m so sick of feeling like I’m living in limbo land. I also keep getting migraines. I think I’ve been getting them since spring, but I thought it was anxiety related. I think it has something to do with the blood flow in my neck. Which is still probably stress and anxiety related. I might go see a chiropractor. I need to go see a dermatologist as well. I have a few moles on my body I’d like to have looked at. My mom got melanoma when she was around my age, but they found it and were able to cut it out in time. An acquaintance from high school I knew, passed away from melanoma a few years ago. I’d rather be safe, than sorry. I go for my gynecology appointment soon as well. I’m going to get everything checked out and have all the usual tests run. I like knowing that my body is clean. It brings me peace of mind. I’m proud of myself for accomplishing everything I have. I’m proud that I’m growing gracefully and entering adulthood somewhat soundly. I’m happy with the majority of my decisions up to this point in my life. 
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incorrectbatfam · 2 years
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Stepmom!Selina?
She sees what she's getting into from a mile away, but she welcomes it because Bruce's kids are a part of him, and she loves all of Bruce.
The kids all see it coming too, and while some (Damian) take longer to warm up to her, she's welcomed into the fold with open arms.
Selina's got a heart as big as her partner and while she's not always perfect, you can see how much she cares.
As a former foster child herself, Selina understands Duke's unique experiences and traumas from the foster care system, so whenever he needs to talk, she's the first one he goes to. Sometimes he doesn't want to (or need to) talk, so they'll watch boxing matches or she'll teach him little bits of Mandarin. If the kitchen isn't busy, they'll try their hand at new TikTok recipes, and film themselves either succeeding or debunking the original poster.
Being raised in isolation to be a human weapon meant Cass missed out on a lot of the things daughters typically learn as children/teens. The evening of Cass's first gala, she didn't know the first thing about doing her own hair and makeup. She's braved assassin armies, but her self-made disaster of bobby pins and eyeshadow nearly drives her to tears. Selina swoops in, wipes Cass's face with gentle reassurances, and walks her through step-by-step.
Selina considers it a privilege to have watched Dick grow from the spunky little Robin to the man he is today. Even though he's taller than her, she still ruffled his hair when he does a good job. She also keeps the first ever birthday card he gave her, which includes a pop-up bat signal and scented stickers, and remembers all of his favorite radio stations. Also, when Bruce does something, Dick goes tattling to Selina.
For a while, Carrie mooched off of her siblings' Netflix profiles, but everyone got tired of her messing up their algorithm and she was forced to make her own. She soon realized how much freedom she had because no one could see what she was watching. Selina caught on to the power trip and started researching and watching snippets whenever a new show comes out. That's how she stopped a bunch of preteen girls from watching Squid Game.
Tim often gets overlooked as not just the middle child, but the child who appears put-together and regularly takes on adult responsibilities. Selina, however, remembers that he's still a teenager. She regularly checks in and gradually teaches him that it's okay to let go and act his age. Selina encourages him to call his Young Justice friends outside of missions and take small acts of rebellion against Bruce. When Tim and his boyfriend snuck out to a famous lover's lookout, Selina gave them the car keys and covered for them.
She noticed that Jason really enjoys hanging out with Harley Quinn, bonding over not just Joker trauma but other shared interests like music taste. After Harley turns to the antihero side, Selina discusses with Bruce and they start inviting Aunt Harley and Aunt Ivy to dinner. The first time they do that, Harley is so excited that she baked a three-layer cake just for Jason. Literally, in strawberry frosting, it said, "THIS CAKE IS FOR JASON ONLY." Finding someone that Jason can relate to remains one of Selina's proudest accomplishments.
She's trying her best, but she makes mistakes too. For instance, although Wayne Manor has plenty of kitchen space, Selina does her cooking at Harley and Ivy's because Ivy can offer her fresh plant-based ingredients that suited Damian's needs. When Alfred's not available, she sends Damian to school with healthy, flavorful vegan lunches shaped into Cheese Viking characters. One time, she was tasked with bringing brownies to a PTA meeting. Incidentally, Harley was simultaneously baking a... different kind of brownie for a block party (you can see where this is heading). When an angry superintendent demanded to know who was responsible, Selina wisely kept her mouth shut and thankfully, so did Damian.
Cullen loves concerts, but he's a huge introvert who gets anxiety when he's left alone in a crowd. Selina becomes his concert buddy, and she'll go as all-out as he does. Sometimes that's showing up to a garage band dressed-down in hoodies and sunglasses. Other times it's painting their faces and looking like they just came out of a Hot Topic blowout sale. She even listens to the discography beforehand so she can blend in. Selina learns a lot about Cullen through this, because nothing says more about a person than the music they listen to.
Harper, though looking rough around the edges, turns into a giddy little kid at interactive science museums. During one of these trips, Harper got distracted by the giant Newton's Cradle so she didn't notice a fourth grade field trip sweeping up Selina. When they reunited at the gift shop, a chaperone had given Selina a school t-shirt and she was put in charge of grading ten kids' assignments. Harper laughed so hard that she spewed lemonade on the museum owner. Neither of them will let the other live that day down.
Selina and Barbara openly talk about guy stuff, and Selina is more than happy to offer advice in times of need. They're both pretty liberal talking about that stuff, and one time they did a tier ranking of all the Gotham Rogues based on how effective their gimmick is (Joker was the only S-tier). They then proceeded to get into a debate on whether or not Man-Bat and Killer Croc should qualify for the list, which led to them staring each other down at dinner while the other family members sat around them confused.
Steph's school offered a Mother's Day breakfast. Although Crystal Brown was doing her best and wanted to make it, she was scheduled a double-shift that the breakfast fell right in the middle of. Selina reached out to Crystal and with permission, went in her place. Afraid that Steph would publicly reject her, Selina sat in the parking lot for ten minutes as Bruce amped her up over the phone. Steph, thinking that no one would no up, was ecstatic and said that she couldn't have thought of anyone better. They enjoyed stacking up waffles and making the girls who bully Steph envious.
Long before she and Bruce got married, Selina made it clear that she would not be relegated to the gender-typical role of a homemaker, and Bruce happily concurred because it's 2021. They knew that to give Alfred a break, they'd have to take on some chores themselves. Instead of dividing up a boring old chore chart, they find ways to make cleaning fun and collaborative. They'll dance around the halls in mop slippers, play "guess the stain", and race their roombas. The kids see this and start modeling the behavior in their own ways—Dick swings from high places to dust them, Damian trains his pets to pick up garbage, and Cass and Duke compete to see who can clean the most bathtubs.
Some parts of the Manor are due for redecorating, so Selina and Alfred make a day trip out of interior design sketches, flipping through furniture catalogues, and looking at paint swatches. It sounds boring at first, but the menial tasks meant they had plenty of time for conversation, and she finally understood why everyone respects him. They also made room in the afternoon for a stroll through the park and afternoon tea, where he told her and her only the secret to a perfect scone.
The other Justice League partners welcome her into the group too. Whenever Selina's in Metropolis, she joins Lois and Ma and Pa for Sunday brunch where they share what their kids have been up to. Iris shows her life hacks to cooking large batches of food in a short time. Selina and Dinah discover an online store dedicated to selling vigilante gear and go on a Cyber Monday spree for their whole families. Steve Trevor, Diana's partner, teaches Selina how to fly with the invisible jet so she can surprise Bruce with the batplane.
After overcoming their initial conflicts, Selina and Talia hold a high amount of respect for each other. Talia sees Selina as not just a capable combatant, but a worthy partner to her former beloved and stepmother to her son. Selina, after spending all that time with the kids, understands the motherly love that Talia holds for Damian and makes it abundantly clear that she would never try to replace Talia in the boy's life. Regardless, looking after all those kids is hard, so they are very much open to the idea of co-parenting.
(Selina doesn't know it, but all this makes Bruce fall in love with her all over again.)
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Who Would’ve Thought
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Requested?: yes! so this is a mashup of sorts. I got three separate requests: the first being an interview scene with a bitchy reporter, the second a y/n x luke with some enemies to lovers and an argument, but the actors get on really well, and the third was for a similar teasing, y/n x luke concept. This doesn’t quite cover every part of each request, but it gets a bit of all of them in, ya know?
Word count:
Author’s Note: i think this is the point where i just accept i am a jatp smut writer, right? i mean, it was only a matter of time before it happened... i liked this, writing it was so much fun, if you like this and want more send it in to me!
Warning: this became fluffy smut, you’re very welcome.
the masterlist is here, because i have more stuff like this.
--
“Ok, ok.” The laughs around set subsided after Madison’s joke, the reporter sitting up a little straighter and coughing to compose himself. “I have to ask, and I have to know since that trailer dropped last week… Y/N, I think everyone watching wants to find out a bit more about you and the character you’re bringing to season two?” He asked, turning his attention from the show’s star to the young woman sat beside her, who was wiping tears from the corners of her eyes, trying to stop laughing.
“What is it you want to know?” She asked, sharing a smiling with Madi as she too sat up straight in her chair once more, running a hand through her hair and crossing one leg over the other, all triggers to help her subside the giggles waiting to erupt from her chest, to calm down and get back to the professionalism she had practiced in her bedroom mirror.
“Well, for starters, what’s it been like, joining the Julie and the Phantoms crew? Am I right in saying this is your breakout role, just like it was for Madison last season?” He asked, and Y/N nodded, gripping Madi’s hand in hers.
“Yeah, it is. And I’ll tell you something, I wouldn’t have known what to do on day one without Madi. The closest I came to acting, to television, before this was when I played a tree in my kindergarten school play.” She explained, glancing past the reporter’s shoulder to see Kenny stood watching them with a grin, sending a thumbs up her way. Her body relaxed a little. “Yeah, I auditioned as a dare from a friend at college and, well…” She smiled wider. “Seems like the best decision I’ve ever made.”
“And from what I can tell, the rest of the cast sat in on your audition?” The reporter asked, looking to both girls for an answer.
“Not the first one.” Madi cleared up. “But Kenny and the casting team loved Y/N, and wanted to make sure she was the perfect fit. They had her perform on the sound stage, and the rest of us just sort of snuck in to watch.” She explained, letting go of Y/N’s hand to gesture as she spoke. “We were all just blown away, and Charlie was the first to shout out after she finished. He called out… What did he say?” Madi asked Y/N, who was laughing to herself at the memory.
“Kenny, will you hire her already?” Y/N answered, and the reporter chuckled again. “And from that moment on, I was Grace.”
“Yes, Grace, our mysterious new rebel child. What can you tell us about her?”
“Ok, so, we’ve got Kenny on standby in case I mess up and give away too much.” Y/N prefaced. “So, Grace is the new girl at Los Feliz High, Carrie’s cousin, and coming in with a bit of reputation where we left off season one. I think the best way to describe would be a musical influencer?” She glanced to Madi, who nodded in agreement. “Bit of a rebel, bit of a spanner in the works for Juke despite her and Luke quite adamantly disliking each other.” She added, and the reporter was nodding his head feverishly.
“Yeah, the trailer seemed to show it. Is that the character’s big goal, breaking up our OTP?” He asked, and Y/N bit her lip as she thought for a moment.
“I think she’s a character with a lot of growth, you get a lot from her in the season, which I was so honoured to bring to the table. We’re doing some reshoots tomorrow, finalising one of the big scenes the trailer didn’t show. I can’t say a lot, but Grace is definitely causing some tension this season, throwing in some music of her own too.” Y/N added, quick to change the subject of discussion to something she knew she was safe to talk on.
“What was it like, working with the rest of the cast on the new season’s album?” The reporter quizzed, taking the hint. “Madi, we heard you and Y/N singing together on the trailer, saw it in one of the stills, I can only wonder how two such talented singers get into each other’s rhythm, especially with the difference in genre. Obviously, Madi you have piano, but with Y/N on guitar, I just wonder how it all worked out while filming?”
“We actually wrote the song for the trailer, along with Charlie. The three of us brainstormed the thing for the first few weeks of filming, just like Charlie and I did with Perfect Harmony last season.” Madi explained. “And you know, we all come from very different musical backgrounds, and it allowed for this amazing mixture of pop and rock and grunge that just works. You only hear a snippet of our song, but just wait until you hear the full thing.” She was beaming, and Y/N couldn’t help but smile and nod along.
“The day we recorded it, man, we were all just electric. There’s this section with the guitars…” Y/N paused. “That I won’t spoil… You can tell this is my first press junket, right?” She laughed, earning chuckles from the studio. No-one blamed her for being new, she was learning quickly enough that it wasn’t a problem.
“So, on the topic of Charlie, who is waving at us right now from behind the camera,” The reporter paused as the girls laughed and waved past the camera recording them all at their co-star. “I have to ask about Julie and Luke, and now this new dimension of Grace.” The girls nodded, a question they both had expected and prepared for. “Madi, are we getting a Juke kiss this season?”
“I really can’t spoil it. It’s not fair… But their relationship does take a few turns, it’s a really interesting subplot.” She said with ease, a rehearsed line.
“And what about Grace? What are her feelings around Juke? Jealousy, perhaps?” The reporter questioned, and Y/N glanced over his shoulder to Kenny, who nodded for her to go ahead.
“Oh, she’s definitely jealous, though it might not be the reason you initially think of.” She said with a smile, quite proud of herself for keeping the answer vague enough, a light switching on on the camera to alert of their time finishing. Y/N smiled, getting herself ready to stand up, glad she had ended the interview on a good answer, when the reporter held up a hand for her and Madi to pause.
“And I mean, that chemistry seems to be translating off-screen too, no?” The reporter pressed on forward with his questions. “I mean, the chemistry you and Charlie have off-screen, Madison, is pretty clear. Is there jealousy off screen from you Y/N?” He asked, the questions turning from family-friendly to gossipy rather quickly. The executive producers stood behind the reporter had lost their smiles, Ortega and Becker ready to march forward and end the interview themselves.
But then, Y/N burst into uncontrollable laughter as a response, Madi quickly joining in one the sole base that Y/N was a rather infectious person. Soon, the whole cast was laughing along, the reporter left in the dark as the camera shut off and the girls left the press set stage in giggles, the crew suddenly moving quickly to start packing up for the night, the reporter being led off by assistants as the girls made their way over to their waiting friends and castmates.
The interview had been Y/N’s first and the team’s last of the day, and with the next day being their final shoot day for the season, the younger cast members had decided to celebrate and go out to dinner together, a pre-celebration to the wrap party the next day.
Stood by the studio’s exit was the rest of the dinner party: Jadah, Savannah, Owen, Tori, Sacha, Jeremy, Booboo, Tori, Kyra, Sofia, Halle, and Charlie, the last of whom swung his arm over Y/N’s shoulder as she and Madi joined the group, starting out for a restaurant on the far side of the lot.
“Not bad for a rookie, sweetheart.” Charlie spoke with a teasing tone, earning an elbow to the ribs from his friend. The pair had been inseparable for the whole year, since Y/N got the role in fact, and his arm across her shoulders was such a familiar and comforting feeling, that she found herself cuddling into him as they got out onto the lot and the Vancouver wind chill hit hard. Without pause, Charlie shrugged off his jacket and sat it over Y/N’s shoulders, the pair sharing a smile.
“You know, you should invest in shirts with sleeves, Gillespie.” She muttered, rolling her eyes as he responded with a smirk, flexing his biceps as his arm settled back over her, this time Y/N’s hand coming up and their fingers interlocking as they followed the group towards the restaurant. Madi and Savannah were up front with the other Dirty Candy girls, all singing one of the new songs from the show as they skipped their way across the lot, while Jadah, Sacha, Owen, Booboo and Jeremy were in the middle of the group, seemingly discussing what they were getting for dinner, confirmed when Owen started to rave about one of the desserts the restaurant had rather loudly.
Y/N watched the scene with a smile, watched all her friends with a smile. She knew she was lucky, she reminded herself of it every day she spent with the group of amazing people she had come to call her family. The move to Vancouver for filming was a huge shift, and she had initially thought she’d be alone and homesick, spending all her free time at her rented flat reading out scripts to her walls, but it hadn’t been the case. The cast had adopted her like she had been there since day one, they made her feel welcome and at home in the foreign city, Charlie especially. He was the one who got her out of her shell, who made sure to invite her to every dinner and party and hangout in the first few weeks of filming. He was the one who played guitar with her, who came and stayed with her for a week when she was unwell and stuck inside her little flat.
He was the one who was watching her at that moment in time, a dopey smile on his face as he pulled her closer into his side, pressing a kiss to the side of her head as they followed their friends round a corner, their destination that night coming into view, along with some extra familiar faces.
“Gotta be careful, Y/N, Charlie has a habit of passing on his fleas.” The teasing came from Charlie’s sister Meg, who slipped through the small crowd to hug her brother and his best friend hello.
“Don’t worry, I’ve been getting him treated.” Y/N responded with a grin, the pair sharing a tight hug before Meg moved on to squeeze her brother in hello, both girls smiling at his surprised expression.
“I didn’t know you were coming over.” He guffawed, his smile radiating as he hugged Meg tightly, Y/N moving off to greet Carolynn, Jeremy’s wife, who had also surprised with her appearance. By the look of pride on Owen’s face, it was pretty clear who had planned the gift for his friends. Y/N held out a fist to Owen, who quickly pounded his own against it before the girl continued walking, making her way to Savannah’s side as they found their table in the restaurant far corner, the pair getting themselves sat down. With the two playing cousins on the show, they had both made an effort to get closer, an effort Y/N had made with the whole cast, though her and Savannah got on like a house on fire: they were the same age, and had assumed the roles of big sisters to the younger cast members like Madison and Jadah.
“Charlie’s jacket looks good on you.” Savannah commented with a wink, and Y/N rolled her eyes, shrugging the item off just as Charlie and Meg entered the restaurant with Jeremy, Carolynn and Owen.
“You need to stop; you know Kenny has started commenting on what a good couple we’d make thanks to you?” Y/N questioned, and Savannah nodded with a proud smile. “I suppose you actively put the idea in his head?” She quizzed further, receiving another nod.
“We’re all just waiting for you to get together at this point.” Savannah said with a shrug, a few sets of eyes looking over.
“What, Y/N and Charlie?” Sacha asked from across the table. “Oh, yeah, definitely.”
“Every three months we start a pool and bet on specific dates for you two finally giving in and dating.” Booboo said through a mouthful of bread. “Whoever gets closest is going to be so, so rich.”
“How many people are in on this?” Y/N asked, wide eyed with raised eyebrows. It was new information, at least to her it was, but the rest of the table had heard it all before.
“Sixty three.” Tori answered, sending over a wink as the table burst into laughter, quickly shutting up as the final members of their party started sitting themselves down, Charlie sliding himself along the booth chair to sit beside Y/N, Meg on his other side.
“What’s the joke?” He asked with a cocked brow, and Y/N shook her head, warning him to not venture any further. “Better not to ask, got it.”
“So, we’re thinking of karaoke later?” Kyra spoke up from the top of the table, earning nods from around the table. “Perfect, I’ll book the room.” She said quickly, typing away on her phone to set the group’s plans for the evening in stone.
“Maybe Y/N and Charlie can give us their ABBA medley.” Jadah suggested with a wiggle of her eyebrows, sat on the other side of Savannah. Y/N gave her the finger while Charlie chuckled, throwing an arm over her shoulder.
“Come on, it wouldn’t hurt you, would it Y/N?” Charlie asked, using his best puppy dog eyes on the girl, who reached to grab a slice of bread before Booboo finished it all, chewing it thoughtfully.
“Only if Sacha is our Dancing Queen.” Y/N said with a happy sigh, the blonde boy across the table nodding quickly.
“Happy to do it. Yes. Yes.” He nodded fast, feigning a bow as the table cheered, Charlie looking over at Y/N with a soft smile. She smiled back before resting her head on his shoulder, a part of her still recuperating from the interview. How these guys had done multiple that day, how Madi had sat through almost every single one, Y/N couldn’t figure it out; but the thoughts faded away as menus were brought over and drinks ordered, setting the evening off on the right foot.
By the time food was placed down, the topic of conversation was focused on Carolynn and Jeremy’s dogs, the pair quite happy to show off photos of their fur babies as castmates ate around them, with brief interruptions to talk about the upcoming wrap party the day after, and discussions of the season two premiere plans the following month. With the filming almost finished up, everyone was making plans to head back home to families as they all awaited the news of renewal for a third season. Apartments in Vancouver were being packed up, Y/N herself had started the process of boxing up the life she had made over the past year in the city, with her friends, to ship back off home.
“You alright?” A whisper came into Y/N’s ear, pulling her from her zoned out state as she twirled spaghetti mindlessly round her fork, blinking a few times before looking over at Charlie, who watched her with concern in his eyes. She nodded a little, setting down her fork and taking a sip of her soft drink before shaking her head, lifting up Charlie’s beer and taking a swig, frowning at the taste but swallowing anyway.
“Just thinking about leaving is all.” She muttered back, shrugging a little before trying again on her pasta, eating a mouthful before continuing. “Just, what happens once we wrap for the season? What happens if the show doesn’t get renewed?” She asked quietly. “I don’t want to lose all you guys… I just got you.” She tried to make a joke of it, but the thought had been weighing on her mind for a while. Would they all stay friends? Keep in contact even though they would be spread over the globe?
“I can assure you, sweetheart, no-one will be losing contact with you. If any of these guys love you half as much as I do, they won’t be able to say goodbye to someone as awesome as you.” Charlie whispered in her ear, his hot breath fanning over her neck, and Y/N blushed a little, taking his free hand in hers and giving it a quick squeeze to say thank you.
“How’s it all going, everyone?” The server broke apart the moment and halted the rest of the table’s conversations, Y/N and Charlie quickly dropping their hands and turning back to their own meals as the rest of the table chorused compliments of the food, Booboo and Jadah insistent that dessert menus be brought along as soon as possible. A quick glance around the table revealed that Y/N was extremely far behind the rest of the table in finishing her meal, but her appetite had suddenly disappeared, most likely from the melancholy.
“Could I get a triple vodka coke?” Y/N asked the waiter before he left, smiling up at him as she closed her cutlery.
“Of course, miss. Anymore drinks?” He asked, jotting down a cocktail for Halle and another small glass of wine for Jeremy, disappearing back into the main body of the restaurant as the last few party members finished their meals, drinks arriving with dessert menus.
“A toast.” Jeremy raised his glass, prompting the rest of the table to follow suit. “To Julie and the Phantoms, to found family… And to another season.” He thought over the words as he spoke, Carolynn watching him with adoring eyes, their hands linked atop the table. The toast was met with cheers, Owen letting out a rather loud ‘Whoop!’ as glasses were clinked and drinks were sipped, the night only just beginning.
--
Kenny Ortega was rather glad he had left Y/N and Charlie’s big confrontation scene for their last day of shooting, and after walking into work the following day and finding, quite literally, everyone glued to their phone screens, he decided to check his own Instagram.
The night before had been a success for the young cast, and after dinner the group had travelled into the centre of town for a night of drinks and karaoke, the evening’s highlight being the video that was circulating that morning, of Charlie and Y/N sharing a mic as they sang ‘Waterloo’ by ABBA: Owen had caught the whole thing and put it on his story.
That video was also followed by a photo of Y/N and Charlie sleeping on the couch together at Owen and Charlie’s place later that night.
There was a level of professionalism that had to be maintained in a workplace for productivity, but the ‘something more’ friendship the two guitarists shared had caught the attention of the whole team. It had started betting pools and conspiracies and a game amongst the team to catch pictures of the pair acting like a couple. The kids had started it, of course, but seeing the way the two interacted both on and off-screen had gotten the rest of the crew involved. There was an undeniable connection there, and the waiting game was part of the fun.
And so, as the cast started to arrive for the 12 pm call time on location at the garage, all the reshoots that day needing midday sunshine, no-one was surprised to see Charlie carrying Y/N into work on his back as the pair shared a joke. In fact, they were quite excited to see how they would react to the final scene they had to shoot.
Kenny had given them both the script the week before, but refrained from discussing it with the pair until that day, partially pressured by the likes of Savannah and Owen, simply because an authentic kiss, without the practice or specific instruction from the director, would make for better tv. The plan was to get some close ups, positioning them for certain moments, then run it through once, getting as many extra shots as possible, with the hope being they could do it in one take. At best, it would work, and at worst, both Charlie and Y/N were still actors, and could make a kiss look real.
It took about an hour or so for the cast to get through the makeup, hair and costume departments, and Kenny pulled in Jeremy, Owen and Madi for some reshoots first, leaving Y/N wandering with a bottle of water in one hand and her script in the other, pacing back and forth as she ran the lines over and over again in her head.
The scene was an important one, the start of Juke’s conflict for the season, of Grace’s and Julie’s friendship being tested. From what else the girls had filmed over the past few months, it was clear that the season would leave their friendship on a cliff-hanger, this scene being the catalyst. And it was funny for Y/N, to go from her friendship with Charlie to being Grace, the girl that hated Luke. It took her a little while to get into the right headspace, though it wasn’t easy with all eyes on her, nor with the teasing she was receiving from friends about the night before, and her crashing at Charlie’s. It wasn’t news, Y/N sleeping over at Charlie’s, or vice versa; it was common place actually, after the first few months of friendship it just became a norm for them.
Grace’s character arc was one of reckless abandon, and she almost becomes a bad influence on Luke’s bandmates with her risky ideas and rebellious attitude. They had shot the previous scene, in which Julie falls down the school bleachers while with Grace and twists her ankle badly, the character very lucky it wasn’t worse. And Luke, already disliking Grace, confronts her when the girl comes looking to apologise. The tension that they had built over the season boils over, and Grace kisses Luke, the first time either of them have touched before.
Y/N was a little nervous about that last part.
She was an actress, but it would be her first on-screen kiss, and while the thought of it being with her best friend should have eased her mind, it did anything but. Kissing Charlie, whether she wanted to admit it or not, was probably going to be awkward, cause a rift between the two for at least a little while. And that would have been fine, if they weren’t all heading off home to separate corners of the world for however long.
“You look worried.” It was Owen’s voice that pulled her from her thoughts, the girl turning to find him leaning against the prop table nearby, arms folded and a look of concern on his face. “You alright?” He asked, glancing back over at the set. Jeremy and Madison were still getting some reshoots done, and Charlie was with Savannah and Booboo over in costumes, chatting away as the seamstress sat his clothes just right.
“I don’t really know…” Y/N admitted, looking back at Owen with a shrug. “I mean, I just…” She paused, letting out a sigh. “I’m worried things might be weird? Worried I might suck at the whole kissing thing, ruin the last scene we have to shoot?” She explained, glancing back down at her script as Owen watched on, thoughtful.
“Y/N, you’re a good actress. If the last year has proved anything, it’s that you are meant for this role. You’ve just gotta… You’ve gotta embody Grace, don’t think of it as you and Charlie anymore, because I know that’s what you’ve been doing for the past week. It’s Luke and Grace, yeah?” Owen stopped to make sure Y/N was following, and she nodded. “We need to get you into that headset before we start, alright? You know how to be Grace; you need to get into her before the cameras start rolling. I mean, you’re already dressed like her.” Owen gestured to the clothes she was in, and Y/N smiled.
She did already feel a bit like Grace in the outfit, style choices she had helped to make at the start of the season. To contrast from Carrie, she offset her cousin’s pink and preppy wardrobe with dark colours: Y/N was currently in black jumper with red detailing, paired with a short, tight black denim skirt and a belt that pulled in her waist, plus the fishnet tights and sturdy doc martens her character would soon be known for. Those shoes were the only pair she had worn all season. The makeup and hair team had left her looking flawless, with her hair curling and her eyeliner in a perfect wing.
The more she thought about Owen’s words, the less anxiety she felt.
The more she felt like Grace.
“Ok, ok… We’re getting somewhere.” She informed her friend, Owen holding out an arm for Y/N to link with, the pair beginning a sure march over towards the set, watching Madi finish the last few takes.
“You need anything else?” Owen asked, raising an eyebrow to the shorter girl when she nodded, watching her take a deep breath.
“Put on some music? Just… Something fun?” Y/N asked, having faith that music would completely rid her of her nerves for the scene. Kenny called cut, Madi and Jeremy making their way off set with smiles as they headed towards Owen and Y/N, the blonde boy connecting his phone to the nearby Bluetooth speaker while the set was changed for her and Charlie’s scene.
“I can’t believe this is the end of season two… Y/N? You ok?” Jeremy commented then questioned as he came over with Madison, the latter reaching a comforting out to Y/N’s arm.
“She’s getting in the zone.” Owen explained, finally deciding on a song, the music playing around them and earning a few cheers from the other cast mates, Charlie looking over from where he stood with Savannah and Booboo, his eyes landing on Y/N, who had begun swaying along with the song. She had a habit of this, using music to get into character, though it was usually through headphones in some far off corner.
“Loving you isn’t the right thing to do.” The speaker sang out the Fleetwood Mac hit, Booboo and Savannah beginning to dance along by Charlie as he watched Y/N from across the room, curious as to what she might do. “How can I ever change things that I feel?” Lindsey Buckingham’s voice resonated around the room, and Charlie took a step closer to his main castmates, watching as Madi held Y/N’s hand, quickly realising why the music was blaring.
Y/N was nervous.
“If I could, baby I’d give you my world.” The tracks vocals were overshadowed as Charlie began to sing, heads spinning to look at him as he spun himself around and started his way towards Y/N. “How can I, when you won’t take it from me?” He sang, holding out a hand for her to join him. They were both well aware that two things in particular made Y/N feel better: the first was music, the second was Charlie. With a push from Madi and Owen, Y/N could no longer hide the smile that was forming on her face, taking Charlie’s hand as he led her into a space in the room’s centre. While the crew set up for their scene, cast and producers watched on as the pair got into character.
“You can go your own way!” Y/N sang out, spinning under Charlie’s arm with a grin that scrunched up her nose and made Charlie smile right back, singing the response harmony of the chorus. “You can call it another lonely day!” The pair sang together, Kenny himself starting a clap in time with the music, the whole set soon joining in, cheering the pair on as they got themselves into character.
“Tell me why, everything turned around. Packing up, shacking up is all you wanna do.” Charlie sang scowling at Y/N with his rather adorable grumpy face, and Y/N held a hand out to stop him from coming any closer, playing the part of Grace.
“If I could, baby I’d give you my world. Open up, everything’s waiting for you.” She sang, bouncing a little as she sang, shaking away the last of her nerves as the second chorus came in, the whole room singing along now.
“You can go your own way, go your own way. You call it another lonely day!” As the crew finished setting up the garage for their scene, Charlie grabbed Y/N’s hand as squeezed it tightly.
“We’ve got this, alright?” He reassured, and she nodded, the pair getting into places as the music slowly died down and their fellow castmates and crew members cheered.
“Feeling better?” Kenny asked as the two got into positions, Charlie sat inside the garage as Y/N stood just beyond the doors, being handed a bouquet of flowers by the props manager.
“A lot, yeah.” She smiled, and Kenny gave her shoulder a pat.
“Just go for it, alright? Give it everything, give it electricity, you’ve got this.” His motivational words brought a smirk to Y/N’s face.
“I know I do.” She answered with a nod, Kenny walking back to behind the cameras and taking a seat, Y/N taking a one more moment to focus herself before Kenny yelled ‘action!’.
--
Grace wasn’t used to feeling guilty about anything, it just wasn’t a part of the life she enjoyed: she wasn’t an inherently bad person, though it could be argued she was a bad influence. As she stood in Julie’s driveway, a bouquet of flowers in hand, she felt like a bad influence. No, worse than that.
She felt like a bad friend.
Julie wouldn’t be in this mess if Grace hadn’t convinced her to go out with her the night before. Of course, she should have known that this time of year, with the uncommon rainfall and milder weather, that the bleachers would have been slippery. Grace should have suggested going somewhere else, shouldn’t have rushed up the steps and forced Julie to follow.
And while flowers weren’t going to help a lot with the twisted ankle, she hoped they’d lift Julie’s spirits a little. The doctors said it wasn’t serious, just a week or so in a pressure sock to stop anymore damage, and Julie had promised her the day before she was fine, but even so. Grace had picked out dahlias, Julie’s favourite, and was hoping to bump into Alex or Reggie or Carlos, leave them with her apology for Julie without much confrontation.
Instead, heading up the driveway and pulling open the garage door, she was welcomed by the sound of an acoustic guitar, and a frown settled on her features. Of course, of all the people it could have been, Luke was the one at home.
“What are you doing here?” He asked quickly, jumping up from the couch and setting down his guitar. Grace sighed, a roll of her eyes causing Luke to scoff.
“You know, I’d punch you if I could ghost boy.” She muttered, setting the flowers down on the coffee table. “I just wanted to leave something for Julie, alright? Don’t get your…” She paused, thinking for a moment. “Do you have underwear? I mean, ghost clothing isn’t exactly my specialty.”
“You’ve got some nerve showing up here after what you did to Julie.” Luke said coldly, arms folded across his chest as they stood at opposite sides of the room. He took a few steps to the side, lifting himself up onto the piano. Luke liked to have the high ground.
“What I did to her? Luke, she fell over. It was an accident!” She exclaimed in response, already riled up just being in the boy’s presence. She wasn’t quite sure why she had been cursed with the ability of being able to see Luke at all times, but she wasn’t going to let her annoyance with the guitarist go unsaid.
“An accident that could’ve killed her!” Luke snapped back. “What if she had hit her head instead of just twisting her ankle? Can you answer me that Miss Influencer?” He asked, and for the first time since the pair had met, Grace didn’t answer him back. Luke scoffed; quite certain he had won. “I don’t know what voodoo you put my friends under to make them like you, but I promise I see right through you. Through the clothes and the Instagram followers. All of it.”
“Do you think I wasn’t scared for her? Huh, Luke?” Grace snapped back. “I was the one there, watching her fall down the bleachers, the one who rushed after her and called her dad. Where were you, exactly?” She asked, a smirk settling on her lips. “You know, Lover Boy, if I remember correctly, you were off moping because I’m a better guitarist.” Her tongue came out to graze her bottom lip as she smiled, walking over to Luke’s electric that sat on a nearby stand.
“First off, you aren’t. It’s quite clear who’s better between the two of us.” Luke fought back, jumping off the table and marching over to pick up his guitar before Grace touched it. “And second, I wouldn’t have left her if you hadn’t been there. Because actually, Grace, it’s you that’s the problem!” He had raised his voice as he walked back across the room, setting his guitar atop the piano. Grace scoffed; he just didn’t want her touching his things.
“Right, because Julie can’t have friends if it’s not you, right?!” She was almost yelling now as well, but it was to be expected of the pair. Every conversation they had had was building to this argument. Every conversation they had shared was just bickering. “Hey Mr Invisible Man, news flash! Your crush is allowed to have relationships outside of you! I realise being dead is probably very boring, but Julie’s alive.”
“I just don’t think my friends should be associating with someone as infuriating as you, Grace!” Luke turned to face her again, all wide eyes and gestures. “I didn’t think I could hate people before I met you! I’ve had my music stolen; I’ve almost been enslaved for eternity; I died! And yet, the person I despise most in this world is you. Congratulations!”
“I take it as a compliment! You know, I’m honestly proud that I’m not friends with a self-centred, arrogant, inconsiderate, overbearing jerk. If anyone is fooling our friends Luke, it’s you.” The words were quick and cold, and Luke found himself marching forward until the pair stood about a foot apart, Grace forced to to look up at him, keeping big her chin high.The words were quick and cold, and Luke moved a few steps closer, and Luke moved a few steps closer, the pair a few feet apart, glaring one another down.
“They aren’t our friends, Grace. My friends are just too nice to leave you hanging.” Luke voice had lowered in volume, but the venom was still there as he took a step closer, then another. “You act all mysterious, but you’re an open book, Grace. You’re a lonely girl with a taste of relevance. That’s it.”
“Like you aren’t the same?” Grace asked, stepping forward so the pair were no more than a foot apart. “Quit pretending you aren’t still the lonely kid who ran away from home in 1995, give up the high and mighty act.” She paused, looking him over with a smirk. For a moment, she forgot he was just air.
“I know who I am.”
“Do you?” Grace asked. “That’s not what I see.”
“You don’t know anything about me.” Luke countered.
“And vice versa, ghost boy.”
“I know you’re manipulative, and cold. I know you’re insufferable to be around.” Luke stated firmly, his voice low and laced with malice.
“Anything else to share?” Grace asked. “Or are you done?”
“This is exactly what I mean.”
“You don’t know me!” Grace answered back. “You don’t know why I’m here or where I came from, or what I came from. You don’t get to tell me who I am or what I do or how I act when you have made zero attempts to check your information. I know you because I ask about you! I can call you an arrogant, self-serving halfwit because I actually have tried to figure out why you hate me so much!” She paused for a second, Luke watching in surprise. He didn’t quite feel bad for Grace, but something was building in him, something foreign he had buried away. “If you knew anything about me, you would know what I’m about to do next.”
“What? Leave?” He guessed, his tone still harsh and hostile, but his answer was incorrect. It was quick, something Luke couldn’t process fast enough; but within a second of his reply being given, Grace had somehow managed to touch him, holding her hands to his neck and pulling him down to her level before pressing her lips against his.
Y/N and Charlie both had plenty of experience kissing people, but neither of them had felt like that before.
The moment Y/N’s lips were pressed to Charlie’s, it felt like a thousand butterflies had exploded to life in her stomach, the feeling of his lips on hers making her lightheaded. Charlie’s hands immediately came to Y/N’s waist, pulling her so their bodies were flush and her fingers found their way into the curls at the back of his head.
There was a moment there, as the pair held one another, as they kissed one another, that the rest of the world melted away. One of Charlie’s hands moving from Y/N’s waist to her cheek set the skin on fire, had her heart pounding like it was trying to break out of her chest, had her knees going weak that the only way to stay upright was to pull back, to rejoin reality.
It was only as she looked up at Charlie, still dress like Luke, her peripherals reminding her where she actually was, that a shaky breath left Y/N’s body, and she took a step back. Out of Charlie’s embrace, towards the garage doors she had entered the scene through.
“Make sure Julie gets the flowers… I…” She spoke as Grace, shaking her head in disbelief before exiting out of the garage, leaving Luke, or Charlie, dumbfounded. She couldn’t tell anymore if it was real or acting, the lines had blurred a fair amount.
“And that’s a wrap!” Kenny yelled from behind the cameras, the deafening sound of the cast and crew cheering forcing Y/N to slow her pace, to quickly get accustomed to the noise before joining in. A rather large part of her head was telling her to run and hide, to disappear and never return, to book it for the airport and save herself the embarrassment of her flushed cheeks, of seeing Charlie after what she just felt with his lips on hers.
Her eyes eventually travelled up to see Charlie coming off the set with Kenny in one side of him and Jeremy on the other, Madi and Owen walking over to meet them, the latter waving her over quickly with a grin.
“That was amazing to watch!” Kenny was raving when Y/N arrived over, hands clasped behind her back as the director turned his attention to her. “What did I ask for? Y/N, you nailed it! You both did! The whole place was just electric.” He complimented, Charlie letting out a breezy chuckle as he raised a hand to rub the back of his neck.
“What can I say? You hired some great actors, Kenny.” Charlie felt off saying the words, glancing over at Y/N as he said them, the pair sharing a weak smile. What Charlie had felt while the cameras rolled was definitely not something he faked for the screen. His stomach was still in knots, trying to untangle itself after the way Y/N had kissed him left him speechless.
What exactly was he supposed to do? That information had the ability to ruin the friendship he and Y/N had, he couldn’t risk losing her so permanently. He knew Y/N, if they talked about how he felt kissing her and didn’t feel the same way, Y/N would distance herself from any and all contact, and with them all heading home by the week’s end, it was the last thing Charlie wanted to happen.
“That I did.” Kenny agreed, glancing at his watch. “Right, I’ll let you all go and get out of costume. Wrap Party begins in an hour.” He said with a nod, patting Y/N lightly on the shoulder as he left.
There was a moment of silence between the five of them, an uncommon occurrence, no-one quite sure who should speak first. Instead of speaking, Y/N gave Madi’s arm a squeeze before heading off to the costume department to get out of Grace’s head. Maybe the thoughts of Charlie would clear up once she was back in her own clothes, her own headspace.
The four friends watched her walk off, waiting until she had rounded a corner before Charlie received three pairs of hands punching his arms playfully and shaking him, all their of his on-screen band mates barely able to contain their excitement.
“What, what?” Charlie asked, taking a step back to avoid further battery.
“What?!” Madi exclaimed. “That kiss! Charlie, we all know that wasn’t acting.”
“I’m pretty sure everyone in Vancouver could tell that wasn’t acting.” Jeremy added with a grin, nudging his friend who was slowly getting some colour in his cheeks.
“You guys are all insane.” He said quickly, starting his way over towards makeup, but his friends were hot on his tail, none of them letting this budge. Not again: Charlie and Y/N had gotten away with their flirty behaviour plenty of times before, but this was different.
“You should at least talk to her about it.” Owen said with a grin, hands stuffed in his pockets as they entered the trailer and Charlie sat down, helping himself to makeup wipes and removing the thin layer of foundation on his face. “Charlie, come on… I know that your eyes were closed, but we watched you two kiss. If you’re feeling something, Y/N is feeling it too. There’s no way you both faked that.”
“I’m not ruining my friendship with Y/N over a stage kiss.” Charlie said quickly, pulling off his shirt and switching for his own clothes, looking up as the door opened and Sacha came in with Savannah and Tori, the seven all sharing glances.
“Convinced him to go for it yet?” Tori asked after a moment, and Charlie rolled his eyes, jumping out the chair and walking past his friends. “Oh, come on Charlie! It’s clear you both like each other!”
“Tori’s right!” Madi agreed, first in following Luke out onto the trailer lot. “Why are you so hesitant?” She asked, and Charlie came to a quick stop, spinning on his heel to look at his friends.
“I’m going to go see Y/N. Not because of whatever fantasies you all have in your heads, but because I want to make sure my friend is alright.” Charlie explained, though his words didn’t seem to convince any of them. That was fair, he didn’t convince him. “I’ll see you all at the wrap party, ok?” He clarified, but before he got an answer he made his way into the maze of trailers, taking the precise turns needed to get to Y/N’s trailer.
As he turned onto her row, Charlie found himself slowing to a stop about two trailers away, and taking a nervous gulp. Why, why had it taken so long for him to figure out his feelings? Why was it only once they had kissed that he felt all this emotion surging to the surface? For a moment he wondered if it was just his body reacting to kissing a pretty girl, but he knew that wasn’t the truth. Not in the slightest.
The truth was Charlie wanted nothing more than to feel that ecstasy that came with Y/N’s lips on his all the time, and he quickly formed a do or die plan in his head as his feet started back up, bringing him to the steps up to Grace’s trailer. Her name was pasted with gold sticker on the white door, the tension quickly building in Charlie’s chest.
Do or die.
The polite triple tap on the door hurried Y/N’s getting ready, the girl quickly zipping up her dress before slipping on her shoes for the night and answering the trailer door, the butterflies exploding in her stomach as she found Charlie stood in front of her door.
“Got a second? I was hoping we could talk…” Charlie said quickly, hands shoved in his pockets, a nervous smile on his face that had Y/N thinking the worst. This was about the kiss, it was about how awkward he felt about it, no doubt. She knew her anxiety before it was right, she knew that this would ruin things.
“Of course, come on in.” She said with a little smile moving back onto the trailer and allowing Charlie to make his way inside. As Y/N turned to pick up her phone off the table and place it into her handbag for the party that night, Charlie closed the door behind him with a nervous breath. He watched her for a few moments, smiling at her absentminded humming of the song they had sang together while she packed her things away for the party tonight. He took a step closer, running a hand through his hair and straightening his top up, psyching himself up for what he was about to do. She had changed for the party, and Charlie couldn’t help but admire how beautiful she looked in the baby blue sundress. “So,” Y/N asked as she started to turn around. “What is it you want to tal-”
Y/N was cut off when Charlie gripped her by the waist and crashed his lips against hers, not that she minded in the slightest. She was quick to kiss back, her hands coming to his neck as his hands pulled her closer until their bodies were flush. Whatever worry Y/N had been having about what their characters’ kiss would do to her and Charlie’s relationship was evaporated by the heat, the passion, the electricity of his lips on hers.
Charlie was hit with relief when Y/N kissed him back, when she pulled him closer, just thankful that she might have felt exactly what he did on set. He was about to pull away, apologise for what he was doing, for intruding and not letting her ask her question, but as he pulled back to take a breath, Y/N caught his bottom lip between her teeth for a moment, and Charlie was gone.
He pulled her close again, this time his tongue entering her mouth and starting a battle for dominance against Y/N. His hands travelled towards her ass, only gaining control of the kiss when he surprised Y/N by picking her up. She wrapped her legs around his waist as her dress rode up her thighs, hands moving from his neck to grip the front of his shirt, breaking off the kiss for a moment.
They looked at one another, breathing heavy and pressed to one another, both just trying to comprehend what they had done. Y/N was the first to catch her breath, looking up at Charlie with a blush across her cheeks and blown pupils.
“No-one’s ever kissed me like that…” She whispered out, smiling as a smirk played on Charlie’s lips.
“Same.” He responded, walking over and setting her down on the trailer’s kitchenette counter, a hand coming to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. “We’re… We’re idiots, right? For not realising it before?” He asked, and Y/N laughed.
“The amount of time we’ve wasted…” She muttered before pulling him for another kiss.
It quickly became heated again, neither of them quite able to control themselves. It was tongues and teeth and moans, and it wasn’t long before Charlie was leaving a hickey on Y/N’s neck and she was pulling off his shirt, quickly reminded of her friend’s body… God, he was hot.
“How long until the wrap party?” Y/N asked through a moan as Charlie pulled away from her collarbones, marks scattered over the skin Y/N would struggle to hide. He pulled his phone from his pocket, checking the time before setting it on the counter beside her.
“About 10 minutes…” Charlie answered, raising an eyebrow when Y/N bit her lip. “What did you have in mind?” He asked, stepping closer, his hands running up the sides of her thighs as he did, pushing her dress up further until he could catch a glimpse of the pastel pink panties she had chosen to wear that day, causing him to groan a little. He could feel his blood rushing down, his jeans becoming tighter around the groin.
“Well, I mean… We’re two consenting adults…” She trailed off for a second, her hands starting on his belt buckle in an uncharacteristically bold move. Charlie’s head fell back as her hand brushed against his bulge, breathing getting heavier once more. “And I’m on the pill…” She added, pushing Charlie’s jeans down slightly, then his boxers, her hand circling his shaft and beginning to stroke it slowly. She was teasing him, waiting for a response, an innocent look on her face that drove Charlie wild. He quickly pulled her panties off, tossing them to the floor and bringing a hand back to her core.
“So wet… And all just for me.” Charlie smirked as Y/N’s expression changed from feigning innocent to one of pleasure: a whimpering moan passing her lips as her eyes fluttered shut, a reaction to Charlie’s thumb circling her clit. “You know, all you had to do was ask.” He whispered in her ear, more of a growl than anything, quickly lining his cock to her entrance and pushing himself inside.
They shared in a moan, Y/N adjusting to the size of his length inside her for a moment, her walls clenched tight around him. They stayed like that for a moment, both adjusting to the feelings, before Charlie’s thumb started up its lazy circles around Y/N’s clit once more. She gave a nod, and Charlie pulled back, this time sinking himself all the way inside her.
They started slow; Charlie enjoying the view of Y/N whimpering in pleasure as she held onto him, begging for him to go faster. He didn’t comply right away, teasing her further with his length, but when she managed to utter out a ‘please’, the bucking of his hips quickened, Y/N’s whole body soon dissolving in the pleasure.
Neither of them had any experience with heaven, but if it was even half as good as the sex they shared, the afterlife would be amazing. Their bodies just worked together, like they were made for one another, each thrust and moan sending pleasure shooting through their bodies. Charlie set the pace, making sure to watch Y/N’s reactions when he changed angle, quickly finding the thrusts that gave her the most pleasure through lidded eyes, and Y/N would tease him further, her walls hugging his cock just enough to have him slipping out curses mixed with her name. It didn’t take very long for Y/N’s legs to begin trembling, Charlie’s hands spreading her thighs further apart as the knots began forming in her stomach, one of his hands moving to hold the small of her back while the other returned to his spot over her sensitive bud.
“Charlie… Charlie I’m close.” Y/N managed to say through breathy moans as the knots in her abdomen got progressively tighter, Charlie moving slightly to find a better angle, beginning to pound mercilessly into her cunt, a smirk on his lips. Her mouth formed into an ‘o’, her eyes rolling back behind hooded lids dusted with eyeshadow for the party that night, the one they were meant to be arriving at 5 minutes earlier.
“Come for me, sweetheart.” He muttered, pressing his lips down on her collarbone as Y/N came undone at his words, the spasms of pleasure bringing forward Charlie’s own release, the smirk quickly fading as he felt his own climax approaching. “Fuck… Y/n, fuck…” Charlie muttered, his thrusts quickly becoming sloppy as he edged on Y/N’s climax, letting out a moan as he shot his load, his head rolling back and his muscles flexing as he filled Y/N, prompting an aftershock to run through the girl, eliciting whimpers from her shuddering frame.
Charlie soon stilled, both of them panting as they came down from their highs, Charlie’s hands on Y/N’s back the only thing keeping her vertical. He leaned forward, pressing a kiss to her forehead gently before pulling out, letting out a hiss from the over-sensitivity as Y/N giggled through a whine.
“Jesus…” She muttered, taking a moment before slipping off the counter, lifting her panties from the floor as Charlie tucked himself back into his jeans and grabbed his t-shirt, the clothing item having landed on the back of the nearby couch. “I’m… I’m gonna clean up.” She informed him, unable to stop smiling as she disappeared into the bathroom, leaving Charlie to smile to himself and fall back on the couch with a beaming grin.
How had any of that actually happened?
He sat back up when Y/N came out of the bathroom, her hair fixed and her dress straightened again, though the blush on her cheeks and nose still remained. Charlie smiled and pulled himself off the couch, walking over to her and quickly pressing his lips to hers. She kissed back, the action shared between them soft and sweet this time around, though it still caused butterflies to erupt in both of their stomachs.
“I was thinking… I know you’ll need to go back home and visit family, obviously… But maybe you could spend a few weeks at my place in LA?” Charlie suggested his thumb rubbing against Y/N’s cheek as they held eye contact. “Meet my parents, maybe?” He added with a nervous chuckle. They had planned for her to meet his mom and dad at some point, and him hers, more for the fact they wanted their parents to know their best friend, but that had obviously changed… Best friends don’t fuck half naked in a trailer on their filming lot.
“I would love that… But you have to come home with me afterwards.” Y/N said with a smile, letting out a sweet laugh as Charlie nodded vigorously, the pair locking lips once more.
That night, when Charlie and Y/N walked into the wrap party with their hands interlocked, there was a relief that sat in the air for the cast and crew. Finally, after a year of betting pools and theories and who only knew what else, it seemed the two had finally stopped being idiots and acted on their feelings. It was confirmed when during a slow song, Charlie pulled Y/N onto the dance floor, the pair sharing a kiss as the music played.
On the side lines, it was Meg, Charlie’s sister, of all people who stood collecting cash from crew members. She had got herself in on the betting pool last time she visited, and had guessed the exact date the pair would finally take their next step.
The question of Charlie and Y/N’s budding relationship should have been a ‘who would’ve thought?’, but, in reality, everyone knew. From Madi to Kenny to literally everyone on the entire planet…
Except for Charlie and Y/N.
--
Tags: @lord-of-the-fried @lolychu @deadashcapper5 @aliceinemeraldcity @eries45 @kristencoontz @walkingonshunshine @wxshing-aep @oswin05 @voguesir @delicatelukepatterson @reggieandthereggies @siennanoelle01 @dxsxstxrhxxd @reggiesleatherjacket @a-whole-a-lot-of-fandoms @thetattooink @futuremrsb-r-main @charliessunset @mlt2000 @overlyhypedup @fangirlanonimax @writerinlearning @dxlanhxlland @manaoioahilinai @cocobuttababy @rosiemay02​ @crookedoperatoroperagarden @theatricalfangirl​ @middaydramatic @mloudfish @mps427​ @sweetdayme4427 @anagc-09​ @feliamtion​ @ohyoureaqueenbutuncrowned​ @caitsymichelle13​ @amortiff​ @lovesanimals​ @crappy-unicorn​ @avs-hart​ @ghostlyb1tch​ @lukeys-giggle @aunicornmademedoit @carleywhittaker @crybabyddl​ @writella​ @isabellaskyliner​ @moonyxnights​ @dmcfarland1​ @kiss-themoongoodbye​ @kcd15​ @ellepscal​ @bookdealer5​ @leahstypewriter​
(i’m doing really badly at tagging everyone who asks, so i’ll be sorting out my taglist around halloween to make sure i can keep all of you up to date on my writing!)
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mrs-gucci · 3 years
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Mr. Handsy {Clyde Logan x wife!Reader}
@icarusinthesea :
Okay, okay. I think I've thought of something. Eh, it's a mediocre idea, but it does it for me. Fighting with Clyde followed by sweet, hot, nasty make up sex. I can not think of anything else. But whatever you write I'll love. 🥰
author’s notes: hello, hello! writers block has been hitting HARDCORE as of late, which is kind of a bummer, but luckily I’m feeling a bit better now! @icarusinthesea​ thank you for this request!! I hope it was worth the (very long) wait, and I send love to you, friend <3 <3
warnings: fluff. smut. club brawls. violence against an asshole. protectiveness. dom!Clyde. oral sex (m receiving). rough sex. unprotected sex/creampie.
(possible) tw’s: non-con touching (not by Clyde). physical conflict. sex in a public restroom.
word count: 1.9k
my general taglist peeps! @safarigirlsp @babbushka @mrs-zimmerman @dirtytissuebox @thepalaceofmelanie @einmal-im-traum @charliesahottie​ @gotham-city-uber-driver​ @gildedstarlight​ @slytheriin2002 clyde’s taglist peeps! @goddessofsprings​ @icarusinthesea​ @lumdelacour​ @readingreaver​ @eagerforhoney​ @trubluepensfan​ @beachwoodmonet​ if you’d like to be added to any of my taglists, the sign up is linked here and can also be found in my description :)
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You had a bad feeling about this place from the very beginning, from the moment you stepped into this stupid sleazy club for your co-worker’s birthday.
Clyde decided to tag along, mainly to hang out with the other poor guys whose wives dragged them along tonight.
The bass pulses your eardrums as you make your way over to the booth that they’d claimed, saying some very loud ‘hi’s’ and ‘hello’s’ to everyone before taking a seat on Clyde’s lap.
Your outfit certainly matches the locale of tonight’s party, sexy and risqué while maintaining at least some coverage and dignity for your larger areas. Clyde’s been having some trouble keeping his eyes, and now that he can, his hands, off you.
His calloused flesh hand runs over your thigh and hip in a soothing manner, mindless in its movements over your exposed skin.
Soon, a good dancing song comes on and no matter how much you try to beg Clyde to join you on the crowded floor, he refuses, insisting that you go have some fun with your friends.
His eyes keep a close watch on you, knowing that unfortunately, it’s highly likely that some bonehead Joe will come along and think he can touch without permission.
He finds himself in a sort of entranced state, watching the way your hips move when you dance, watches your skin bounce and jiggle with each motion, sees the way the multicolored lights bounce off the sequins on your dress…
Sure enough, said bonehead Joe dances his way over to you, not-so-subtly checking you out from a bit of a distance before making his approach.
Clyde almost instantly leaps into action when his hand touches your hip and he slides in behind you. Thinking that the man behind you is Clyde, you start grinding against him a bit more, smirking.
But, only after a second or two, his motions and touch begin to feel awfully foreign. You’ve just truly begun to doubt your dancing partner’s identity when he leans down to whisper in your ear.
“Keep dancing like this and I’ll just have to take you home, babygirl.”
Goosebumps form on your skin in disgust the moment you hear an unfamiliar voice, yanking away from his grubby grip.
“How dar—“
“Hey, you!”
Your eyes widen and you look around the man to see a very angry-looking Clyde storming his way over to where you’re standing.
He turns the handsy man around with a hand on his shoulder, then gives him a shove. “Can’t ya see she’s married, asshole? Don’t you ever think ya can just go ‘round here, touchin’ what ain’t yours.”
“Cly—“
“Don’t ya even start with me right now, Y/N. I can’t believe ya didn’t stop ‘im, can’t believe ye kept grindin’ against ‘im.”
Your eyes widen. “Clyde, p-please, it’s not like tha—“
“I thought I told ya t’ can it, Y/N.”
You shudder at his commanding and harsh tone, immediately backing down and biting your lip as the tears swell in your eyes.
The man wears a small smirk, giving Clyde an equally rough shove backwards. “And what, you’re telling me she’s yours? Bullshit she is. Who’d ever wanna marry a one-armed redneck like you?”
Big mistake. Clyde used to just stand down and shut off whenever someone made fun of his disability, but usually now, he just gets fucking pissed.
Sure enough, his jaw clenches and he quickly lunges at Mr. Handsy, forcefully knocking him to the scuffed dance floor. Often times, mostly due to his kind and gentle demeanor, you forget that Clyde’s a veteran. A special ops veteran, at that.
You can’t deny that bearing witness to his unbridled anger and dominance isn’t at least a little bit sexy, even if you do feel incredibly guilty about not realizing sooner that it wasn’t Clyde.
Like the coward he truly is, and that many men like him are, he flees the scene quickly when he looks up and sees the anger in Clyde’s eyes.
Meanwhile, you instantly rush up to him, apologizing repeatedly. “Clyde, I’m so sorry, I thought it was you and I didn’t mean to—“
He snatches your wrist, bending down so that his hot, slightly strained breath wafts across your face. “You’d better yer slutty ass into the restroom right fuckin’ now.” He growls, letting you go.
You nod, whimpering under your breath as you scurry off into the bathroom.
He follows after you, pushing you into the single stall before reaching around to lock the door.
“Clyde, please, I’m so sorry. I promise that I didn’t know it wasn’t you until he spoke and I pulled away right after that. I would never…”
He holds a hand up and you trail off, then crosses it back over his chest along with the other. When you look up at him, ready to apologize further, he gives you a subtle head shake and a faint smile.
“Get m’ cock out.”
You know, then, that he’s not mad, and you know exactly what he wants from you. You step up to him with a small smirk and pop the button on his Levi’s, pulling the zipper down before reaching in to fish out his half-hard length.
“Now stroke it. You know how I like it.”
Your hand holds a steady grip around the protrusion, starting off slow but quickening randomly, just as he likes it.
His head tilts back onto the cheap tiled wall, nostrils flaring as he exhales shakily. “Thaaaaat’s m’ girl, just like that.”
You speed up just a bit, focusing your pressure and ministrations on the upper half of his shaft, moving the little bit of excess skin up and down his shiny pink head.
“Mmmmffhhh.” He groans through pursed lips, hips rutting forward into your touch.
Suddenly, he pushes your hand away, squeezing his eyes shut for a moment to cope with the sudden loss of stimulation on his pulsing arousal.
“Knees.”
You get onto your knees, using his shoes as cushioning.
“Mouth open.”
Your jaw falls open and he wastes no time in moving himself into proper position, sheathing himself fully in your mouth.
“Ghhhohhh, s-shit.”
You’re choking right off the bat, shoulders shaking with each violent cough.
“Yeah, take it. Gon’ make ye choke on me, shove m’ cock down yer lil throat ‘till ya can’t breathe no more.”
You somehow manage to moan around him in between your gags and coughs, lungs panicked for the rough cutoff of airflow by Clyde’s length. Tears begin to swell in your eyes, soon running down your cheeks.
His eyebrows are tightly knitted in the center of his forehead, skin glistening with the beginnings of sweat as his hips rut into your cavern even quicker and rougher now.
Clyde has to physically pull himself away from your mouth, shuddering as his cock bobs and throbs angrily at the loss of friction. His hand splays out on the wall, chest heaving as he takes a moment to re-gain composure.
Then, he looks down at you, gaze sizzling your very skin.
“Up. Turn yerself ‘round n’ bend over, ass out n’ legs spread nicely.”
You put yourself into the position, wiggling your ass just a bit for play after pushing your jean shorts down, earning you a harsh smack across your newly-exposed skin. He smirks when you squeal softly, giving himself a few lazy strokes as he steps up behind you, lips instantly attacking your neck.
“Yer gon’ walk outta ‘ere with all o’ my marks on your neck, hickeys n’ bite marks. Maybe then everyone’ll understand who it is ya belong t’."
His chin digs into your shoulder, then he’s thrusting forward, filling you up and stretching you out to the max. You gasp, eyelids fluttering as your eyes roll into the back of your skull.
“Ohhhhh.”
He groans into your ear, chin digging into your shoulder as he begins fucking you fast and hard. There’s nothing gentle or romantic about this union; it’s hunger and wanting, it’s pure carnal lust.
Tears quickly swell up in your eyes at the sweet pleasure currently surging through your body, tickling every nerve ending and igniting every pleasure center. 
It’s humid in the club, the bathroom no exception and already, a sheen of sweat has formed on the surface of your skin. Clyde’s good hand takes an even firmer hold on the meat of your hips, hips thrusting at an impossibly fast pace.
“G’damnit, wrapped ‘round m-me so tight, fffuck Y/N. Such a lil’ cccunt, love shovin’ m’ b-big cock in ya, ssssplittin’ ya right in half--christ.”
You love how his accent gets thicker and thicker at times like this, so much so that sometimes you can’t even make sense of what he’s saying. It’s adorable.
“Mmm, C-Clyde! Please baby, please mmmake me cum!”
His lips latch onto the side of your neck, sucking as hard as they possibly can while he reaches around to rub your clit with the cool metal digits of his prosthetic. 
Your hips instantly grind down on him, a shaky gasp leaving your lips. “Ohh god, mmmmmfffuck--right there! Yes, yes, Clyde!”
“Say y-yer mine.” He growls into your ear, panting. “Tell everyone who ya bbbelong to. Scream ma name w-when ya cum.”
“Y-Yours, all yours, Clyde. I’m yours!” You whimper. 
Clyde fucks you with everything he’s got, biting into your skin and sucking more of the flesh until you’re littered with marks. It’s not long before you’re tumbling over the edge, body trembling as you release all over his shaft with a shout of his name.
“Clyde! C-Clyde, fuck!”
Not long after you, Clyde falls over the edge, desperately rutting and fucking each drop of his hot load deep into your spasming cunt.
“Y/N, g’damnit...fuuuckin’ s-shit!”
Both of you are rendered breathless as you come down from your respective highs. His lips and tongue gently soothe the harsh bites and bruises that have been left behind in his wake. 
He sighs softly when he pulls out, helping you pull your shorts back up before tucking himself back into his pants. When you turn around, he crashes his lips into yours, hands resting gently on your hips. 
“‘m real sorry fer that, Y/N; dunno what got int’ me. I didn’t hurt ya, did I?”
You smile, cradling his face in your hands. “Clyde, there is no need to apologize or feel bad for that. You know if I was uncomfortable, I would’ve stopped you or said something. I loved it, more than I probably should have, and I love you.”
His lips tug up into a soft, lopsided smile, relief flooding across his expression.
“I love ya too, Y/N, so, so much. Thank ya fer puttin’ up with me n’ bein’ mine.”
“No ‘thank you’ necessary, baby. I’m yours, always yours.”
Clyde grins, pulling you in for a hug as he repeats your words out loud.
“All mine.”
163 notes · View notes
Text
all worth it
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pairing: tom holland x interviewer!reader
summary: tom is an actor, doing interviews is a part of his job. but there’s just something about you that makes him feel like the stress that comes with press tours and interviews is all worth it.
warnings: none, just fluff
notes: literally got this idea from looking at an onward interview gif (the one where he recites the lines from back to the future, iykyk) also imagine the pandemic never happened in this jfskgh
so tom loves his job, obviously
he gets to be his number one favorite superhero, make people happy, do what he loves, and more
but that doesn’t mean that there are no downsides to his career
there is actually a lot of stress that comes with being in the limelight and that includes people constantly watching your every move, being critiqued, questioned and put on the spot
and the perfect time for all this to occur? during interviews
now some of the time, interviews are nice, sometimes they’re even fun
but unfortunately a lot of the time, the same questions are asked in each and every one, one after the other, for hours on end and it honestly gets very boring and very draining very fast
so to be quite frank, he wasn’t expecting much when he walked into the next room for his last interview of the day
but when you walked in, he couldn’t help but perk up a bit
you were pretty and you seemed very nice as well, greeting everyone, including the crew as you made your way over to tom, jacob and zendaya
some of the interviewers would just walk straight to their seat and start the questions almost immediately, no warmth in their manners––but you, you were different
you shook each of their hands, smiling wide as you said hello
you couldn’t really contain your enthusiasm, you were a big marvel fan, and a fan of each of them, so you couldn’t tame your smile even if you wanted to
your energy was infectious and tom was more than grateful for it
when you reached him, he looked into your eyes deeply and you had to snap out of your daze before you made a fool of yourself
‘hello darling’ he licked his lips as he looked up at you, a gracious smile on his face and you blinked a couple times before responding
‘hi it’s––so nice to meet you, i’m a big fan.’ you turned to look at the others, ‘of all of you, really.’ 
they all ‘aww’ed and accepted your compliments, thanking you as you took your seat
when you were given the green light to start, you gave a curt nod to the crew behind the cameras and started right away
you were professional and good at your job, making the cast feel welcome and at ease after a long day of work
you told jokes, asked interesting questions that others hadn’t and since you were a marvel fan, you were able to ask specific questions that showed your genuine interest in the comics, the films, the plots and more
tom could feel himself getting more comfortable as the interview went on and the smile never left his face throughout the entire thing
when it ended and they turned the cameras off, you all felt a bit disappointed that you would have to say goodbye so soon, you were all having a good time and genuinely laughing so hard that your cheeks hurt 
you thanked them all for their time and jacob was quick to wave you off
‘no thank you––i think we can all agree that we saved the best for last today.’ he looked to his friends and they nodded along
zendaya chimed in ‘for real, this was fun.’
you smiled, honored that you managed to make their day a little better and tom spoke up quietly, making you turn to look at him
‘yeah this, this was really great. thank you y/n.’
you could feel your cheeks heating up but you nodded, smiling as you tried your best to calm your raging heartbeat ‘my pleasure’
tom would have loved to speak with you more afterwards honestly, but unfortunately as soon as he exited the room, he and his friends were being ushered towards the next location for the day, preparing for the long week they still had ahead of them
though you had hoped to see more of tom, you only had one interview with him, so you wouldn’t be seeing him any time soon
or so you thought, anyway
your boss surprised you with a chance to go to the premiere, and interview some of the cast and other actors on the red carpet of course (since you were there for work)
you honestly thought that if tom did see you, he would only give you a small wave, maybe a slight head nod at best since you’d already interviewed him, but to your surprise, when he saw you, he smiled immediately and made his way over to you, swerving away from his entourage (which consisted of his brothers, assistant, and others you didn’t recognize)
‘hi love, how are you?’ 
his eyes were shining under the bright lights on the carpet and there were hundreds of shouts and conversations going on around you, but he somehow managed to make you focus only on him, from his voice and presence alone
‘good! how are you? you excited? nervous?’
he laughed, tilting his head, ‘both, but you know, i’m really proud of this film and i’m ready for people to see it’
you didn’t have much time to talk since there were plenty of other interviewers, journalists and on top of that he had to take pictures so you wished him good luck and he thanked you genuinely
‘i have to run, but be sure to tell me what you think of the movie afterwards, yeah? i know you’re a marvel fan, wanna see if it lives up to your standards’ he winked and you stuttered for a bit, agreeing as he walked off 
you were shocked that he wanted to hear your opinion, but granted there was a camera on you both, which you might have forgotten about while you were talking
but you couldn’t help but think, was that flirting? does he really want to know what i think?
you tried to push the butterflies down and focus on the film as you watched and honestly, it was easy to forget about everything else once you looked at the screen
the film, the plot, tom––everything was so captivating and entertaining, you couldn’t look away even if you tried
it wasn’t until after the film had ended, and you’d stayed for both end credit scenes that you realized you had no way of contacting tom
surely he would have things to do after this, after parties maybe? so you most likely wouldn’t see him outside
and it’s not like he followed you on instagram––he probably wouldn’t even see your dm if you sent one
as you were on your way out, thinking about all this, you felt a hand tap your shoulder and you turned, a smile on your face
but soon realizing it wasn’t who you’d hoped, you tried to not let the disappointment show on your face but as you looked clearly, you realized the man looked familiar
‘hi’ he smiled, ‘i’m tom’s assistant’ you nodded, greeting him a little confused
‘tom’ he started, pulling a piece of paper out of his pocket, ‘wanted me to give you this’ he handed you the paper and you opened it, feeling your stomach jump when you realized a number was scribbled on it, signed -tom ;)
without even realizing, you stared at the ink on the paper for a few seconds silently before his assistant snapped you out of it
‘he wanted you to know that he’s not a dick and he would have come if he could’
you laughed and looked up at him
‘honestly he felt really bad he couldn’t come himself, trust me.’
you nodded and put the paper in your bag, ‘thank you, i’ll be sure to use this’ you smiled
he smiled too, ‘tom hopes you will’ 
you had a feeling that tom would be busy that night, and probably hungover the next morning, so you waited a couple of days before contacting him
and during those two days, tom was honestly freaking out inside...and outside
were you not interested? was he too forward? did he do something wrong? did you get the wrong idea of him?
he was even texting harrison, jacob and zendaya about it in their group chat
tom: i’m an idiot aren’t i
zendaya: yeah but we already knew that
tom: 😑
harrison: i’m sure she’ll text you, maybe she’s just busy
jacob: yeah man, you’re a total catch
jacob: and anyway if she doesn’t want you, i’ll have you 😏
tom: thanks babe 😘
zendaya: i’m just gonna go––
tom: but anyway, i don’t think i’ll ever shoot my shot ever again because this is just embarrassing
not even a full minute passed before the he send the next text 
tom: nevermind she just texted me
tom almost dropped his phone when he saw the message pop up
maybe: y/n: hi tom! this is y/n :) i’m free to give you my thoughts on the movie when you are
you felt like you were going to be sick when you hit send on the message––you didn’t want to bother him, it’d been several days, what if he changed his mind? 
and you––nevermind he responded immediately
tom: hi darling :) i’m glad you used my number 
tom: i’m free to talk now actually, we could facetime if that’s easier? only if you want, of course
you paused when you read his text, luckily you had showered and gotten dressed today so you didn’t look a mess but you opened the camera just to check if you looked alright
were you really about to facetime tom holland?
when you finished fixing your hair, smoothing down your eyebrows and licking your lips, you swallowed your nerves and replied
y/n: sure, i’d like that
he took a deep breath and hit the call button, eagerly waiting for it to connect when you answered
when you both came into view, you smiled, greeting each other shyly
‘was a little worried when you didn’t call me that night’ he admitted sheepishly
your brows raised, surprised ‘oh i just––i assumed you would have been busy you know, after parties and all that’ you laughed and he joined you, a small smile on his face
‘darling even if you called me during the party, i would have left just to talk to you––missed hearing your voice honestly’ 
when you paused to answer a blush coated his cheeks and you couldn’t help but think how cute he looked
‘sorry was that lame?’ he laughed nervously and you shook your head, biting your lip to suppress your smile
‘no––that was, really sweet actually. i––like talking to you too, it’s really nice’ 
soon you get to talking about the actual movie and you couldn’t stop the praises from flowing
‘honestly it was incredible tom, you were incredible, i loved it’
‘thank you love, i’m really glad you enjoyed it, i was hoping you would.’
and the way that tom smiled bashfully and blushed, even pointing the camera away from his face to hide at one point had you swooning more than ever
after that, you and tom texted here and there, sometimes even facetiming, and he wouldn’t hesitate to compare you to his other interviewers and even tell you about it
‘had an interview today, can’t even compare it to yours, love’ 
you just rolled your eyes, a smile on your face ‘oh shut up, tom’ 
you talk often but due to both of your busy schedules, months go by before you see each other again
you run into him at red carpets for other marvel movies, and there’s never a dull moment between the two of you
‘‘there’s my favorite interviewer’ his smile was wide as he walked up to you. ‘you excited for this one?’
you scoffed, fully having a conversation with tom as though you weren’t on camera ‘of course i am, it looks amazing’
‘even better than my movies?’
you raised your hands in surrender, ‘legally, i can’t answer that’
he put a hand to his chest, acting dramatically offended ‘wow well, i guess it’s time for me to go then’
‘at least save me a seat?’ you joked
‘you know i will’ he smirked
by the time ‘the devil all the time’ press came about, you hadn’t told tom that you were assigned to interview him, honestly it was a last minute schedule change 
honestly, he’d gotten good at hiding his bad moods from the public, but you’d known him for enough time now to be able to see when he wasn’t at his 100%
which is why you could see him visibly brighten up when he walked into the room and saw you
‘what are you doing here?’ he asked, clearly (pleasantly) surprised as he hugged you 
‘uh, my job?’ you joked, ‘you didn’t actually think i only interviewed for the mcu did you?’
he blushed, ‘well i uh––no, obviously not’ he said unconvincingly but you brushed him aside as you got ready for the interview
once you started, tom couldn’t help but smile as he watched you, you were just really good at your job and he enjoyed being with you, even when it was for work
‘so obviously audiences are used to seeing you as peter parker, a rather lighthearted character, despite all the hardships he’s had to face––would you say approaching a character as dark as this was challenging in any way? mentally, emotionally, or just in regards to the fact that the public would be seeing a new, more sinister, villainous side to you?’
‘i mean it was a little daunting, definitely. but i was excited to sort of branch out mentally and challenge myself emotionally for this role––the story was fascinating to me and i was just so proud to be a part of this project, i tried not to think of any downsides.’ 
he paused and licked his lips, a glint in his eyes. ‘and honestly, we all have a little bit of a dark side, don’t we?’ 
you paused. of all times to flirt––
‘well hopefully not to the same extent of your character,’ you joked and thankfully the conversation smoothly transitioned elsewhere
now the fans took notice of your bond with tom
they noticed that tom seemed to smile the brightest and laugh the loudest during your interviews, even jumping into other conversations and answers to questions that were directed to his costars
there were dozens of videos, hundreds of edits––
‘tom falling for his interviewer for 9 minutes straight’
and you’d seen them––it was sort of impossible for you to not
you’d been tagged in so many of them, even your friends sent them to you
i mean you weren’t blind, tom was attractive and he did make your heart flutter but you assumed that he didn’t want a relationship since his career was only progressing, skyrocketing either––it would probably be difficult to maintain a solid relationship, or maybe he just wasn’t interested in you so you said nothing
it wasn’t until he had a break from filming that he asked you to hangout, and still you thought nothing of it, until he asked what time he should pick you up
you paused, and he even thought that you froze when really you were just processing what he said
‘like a––date?’ you asked hesitantly
he smiled, scratching the back of his head nervously, ‘yeah? yeah i––like a date.’
you smiled, ‘i would love to tom. but aren’t you worried about pictures spreading online? headlines and all that? i wouldn’t want to add any more stress––’
‘i promise love,’ he interrupted your worried rant, ‘you make it all worth it.’
725 notes · View notes
myhockeyworld87 · 3 years
Text
Under My Skin - Matthew Tkachuk
Word Count: 3,644
POV: Reader
Warnings: Language, Smut, NSFW
Summary: Matthew can be a pest but what happens when your ex, Auston Matthews get under his skin.
Notes: So I’m having a sad bitch moment and thought, why not post this. I finally broke down and wrote for this boy. Who knows if it’ll happen again...haha! At any rate hope you guys enjoy. Happy Reading!
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Matthew first met you over a year ago when you’d moved to Calgary for work. You had just finished your degree and a job opportunity had landed you in the same city where he was playing. You’d been out at the bar with some co-workers and had caught his eye immediately. You were everything that Matthew was looking for in a woman, smart, funny, incredibly gorgeous, with a charm that seemed to draw everyone around you in. You were like a magnet and Matthew couldn’t resist your pull.
 That first night he’d barely been able to talk to you. You’d been besotted with people left and right, and it seemed as though every time Matthew worked up the courage to speak with you, you would get pulled away. Matthew finally ran into you on the way to the restroom. Like, literally ran into you. “Oh my god, I’m so sorry,” Matthew apologized steadying you with a hand on your waist. His hand lingered a little longer than necessary but you weren’t complaining.
 “It’s ok I wasn’t paying attention.” You held up your phone in defense. You’d been so distracted by a text, that you really weren’t watching where you were going. “Did you ever have someone text you that you hoped you’d never hear from again?”
 It was an interesting introduction to a conversation but then Matthew would take any opportunity he could get to speak to you. “Actually, yes.”
 “It’s so annoying, right?”
 “Well, there is a way to solve that problem.”
 Your eyes held his with rapt attention, and Matthew could tell you were clinging to his every word. It was then that it struck him that he never wanted that look to fade from your face. “How?”
 “Come have a drink with me and forgot about whoever it is on that phone.” You smiled. It was a bright, brilliant thing of beauty that Matthew swore could light up the night sky on its darkest days. He was sold right then and there, and with just that simple gesture you had no idea that you’d swooped in and stolen his heart that night.
 You forgot about that text message fairly quickly and just settled into an easy conversation with Matthew. The night flew by and before you knew it, your co-workers were calling it a night and you were all heading home. Matthew asked for your number which you gave in hopes that he would call you soon. Little did you know that after you left, Matthew debated with himself on how long to wait to text you. Every unsaid rule in the code of dating said to wait for at least forty-eight to seventy-two hours before making a move, but Matthew was never one to follow convention. As he lay in bed, he decided to send you a quick message.
 Had a great time tonight.
 It was short and to the point, and Matthew figured if you answered then he would ask you out again. Unfortunately, for Matthew, he wasn’t the only one texting you as you crawled into bed after taking off all your makeup. You were just getting ready to reply to Matthew when another text came in. It was the fourth of the night from the same person that had messaged you before, Auston Matthews.
 You hadn’t spoken to him in months, back when you were in Toronto, and you didn’t plan on speaking to him now, though he seemed to be trying his hardest to get your attention, just as he had been for the last couple of months. Your relationship with Auston had been nothing short of toxic. Oh sure, at first it was all hearts and roses in the beginning. Auston swept you off your feet with that charming smile of his, but then you were young and the flashy NHLer said all the right things, at first.
 You weren’t normally one to tumble into bed right after the first date, though that’s what happened with Auston. He made it seem like you were the only one, but after dating him for only four months you’d found out that wasn’t true. Oh, he tried to brush it off, make it seem like he wasn’t cheating. That the panties you’d found lying tucked between the nightstand and the bed were some old fling and not some random hookup he’d brought home. You wanted to believe him and so you let your heart overpower your head and stayed with him until you’d literally walked in on him in bed with another woman. There was no talking his way out of that one.
 It was an easy decision to break things off with him, though he kept trying to win you back. You were good for his image and he thought that he could keep you happy while he had some fun on the side. The only thing was you didn’t want him back, even though his friends tried to helped his cause. That’s when you decided to take the job in Calgary. It was an easy decision six months ago. Which is part of the reason it surprised you when he texted tonight. He was in Calgary for a game and wanted to talk. You’d honestly were debating seeing him when you’d run into Matthew.
 Matthew, you sighed. His curly hair and shaved sides gave off this bad boy vibe, but as you sat there and talked to him, you’d realized he had to be one of the sweetest men out there. You hadn’t realized at first who he actually was. Auston had turned you off to the NHL scene altogether, so you no longer paid attention to the games, even if hockey was Canada’s major sport. Honestly, you wish you didn’t know he was in the NHL. It was part of the reason you were debating about answering him. Maybe you would just sleep on it and decide in the morning.
 Meanwhile, Matthew was having a mild panic attack. He told himself that maybe you lived close to the bar and had already fallen asleep before you got his text, or that you’d turned off your phone the minute you got home. He constantly kept checking his, looking for those three little dots letting him know that you were sending something back. It was torturous.
 You laid there all of twenty minutes before you decided that you couldn’t resist the curly-haired man that had captured your attention tonight. Grabbing your phone, you shot off a quick, I did too. You typed and erased it three times, wondering if you should add more before finally pressing the send button. There it was done, if he said something back, you’d go from there. Fifteen seconds later, you knew you were in trouble.
 Maybe we could do it again sometime?
 Matthew was sweating as he hit send. He’d never been this nervous before about a woman. They either liked him or didn’t, but you, you were different. He knew that from the moment he saw you. It was even more prevalent now after he’d spent most of the night with you.
 I’d like that.
 Was your simple reply back. One that had Matthew ready to jump up and out of bed with excitement. And so the texting went on for the next ten minutes until he finally ended up calling you. The two of you talked for over an hour, almost as if you’d known each other all your lives, and you completely forgot about the texts from Auston.
 Matthew took you out three days later to an exclusive restaurant in the city. This time you told yourself you’d not make the same mistake you’d made with Auston. So, when the night drew to a close, Matthew drove you to your apartment then very properly walked you to the door and only kissed you on the cheek. It wasn’t what you expected. You’d thought he’d go for more, but Matthew wanted to do things right. He knew you were special and he wasn’t going to mess things up by sleeping with you on night one. He was in this for the long run.
 That was over a year ago. Sure, it had been difficult at first to give him your complete trust, but Matthew had earned it and over time you knew that although he may be a pest on the ice, he was anything but that in your personal life. Now the two of you shared a home and were on your way to making a life together.
 You’d kept your relationship on the down-low, staying off of all forms of social media to keep the wolves at bay. Which meant that no one, including Auston, knew that you and Matthew were dating. That was until he and everyone else saw you in the background of Taryn’s video for Brady’s twenty-first birthday. The picture highlighted Brady but behind him, there was Matthew nibbling on your neck and ear. Fans picked up on it right away, wondering who you were and Matthew decided he was tired of hiding the two of you. A week later he was posting a picture of the two of you holding hands on your way back to Calgary.
 That was dozens of posts and months ago. Your life with Matthew was nothing short of amazing, until the Flames played the Leafs. Matthew was in Toronto while you stayed back in Calgary for work. It was an early game and you joined the other wives and significant others in a small little watch party. Drinks were flowing freely, so you really didn’t catch the exchange between Matthew and Auston in warmups.
 Matthew was minding his own business as he stretched near the centerline. That’s when Auston started with the little jabs. “Nice little piece of ass you picked up Tkachuk.” Matthew was used to guys talking shit about all kinds of things on the ice, though normally it was about him being a dirty player or how Brady was the better Tkachuk on the ice; all that shit he could handle. He wasn’t used to someone taking stabs at you.
 “Shut the fuck up Matthews,” he replied then skated away. If Auston was looking for a fight, he’d get one if he kept up this banter, but not until the game started.
 It wasn’t until the end of the first that Auston got a chance to chirp Matthew again. “Tell me, Tkachuk, does (Y/N) still make the same pretty moans…”
 “Finish that and you’ll regret it,” Matthew told him. It was the only warning Matthew was going to give. Of course, Matthew knew that you’d dated someone in the hockey world and that he’d been a verifiable asshole. He’d never pressed the issue too much as he was trying to turn that stigma about hockey players around. He never liked Auston, he was always cordial to him in non-ice settings but now that he knew he was the cheating bastard who basically used you; he liked him less.
 Play resumed before anything else could happen and Matthew was sure to get in a few good checks in before heading back for the first intermission. When he was back on the ice for the second Auston picked up right where they had left off. “So, you like my sloppy seconds, Tkachuk?” Matthew saw red at the insult, and before he knew what he was doing he dropped his gloves and hit Auston. Inwardly, you cringed at the fight, not wanting to let on to the other girls that you had an idea what the exchange was about. Auston went down easy, with Matthew barely touching him, and so off the penalty box he went, while the Leafs went on the power play. You could see him just sitting there stewing, though you weren’t sure if he was mad at himself for letting Auston get to him or mad at you.
 The game ended up tied in the third, and little did you know that Auston took the opportunity to get a few more digs into Matthew. “Does she get as wet for as she did for me, or do you have to work for it?” Johnny had to hold him back from leveling him after that, but Auston didn’t let up. “She was such a fucking slut for me in bed. You know I fucked every hole…” That’s all he got out before going down hard as Matthew planted a right hook to his jaw. But Matthew wasn’t done and went after Auston as he lay on the ice. Matthew was ejected from the game and the Leafs scored on the power play.
 There was no interview after the game with Matthew, so you had no idea what he was feeling or how pissed he was. As soon as you got home, you tried to call him but it went straight to voicemail. You tried to tell yourself it didn’t mean anything that maybe he never turned his phone back on after the game or maybe they were already on the flight back to Calgary, as the team played at home the following day, but you just weren’t sure. So, you laid in the king-size bed you shared with Matthew, wrapped up in your favorite old t-shirt of his, simply staring up at the ceiling.
 At some point, you must have fallen asleep, for you didn’t hear the door open or Matthew dropping his bag like you usually did. It wasn’t until he crept into bed that you finally knew he was home. He was laying on his back, hands behind his head when you finally rolled over letting him know you were awake. You’d thought about what to say to him before falling asleep but waited for him to say something to you. When he didn’t you simply whispered, “If you want me to go I will.”
 “Go?” Matthew questioned now rolling on to his side so he could see you. “Why would I want you to leave?”
 “I never wanted to be a problem for you, Matthew, especially not with other players.” It was part of the reason you’d never told him that you’d dated Auston, though you should’ve known that Auston couldn’t keep his mouth shut.
 You went to say more, but Matthew stopped you. “You’re not the problem (Y/N). You could never be one.” His fingers ran up and down your arms lightly, just caressing your skin. “I love you, baby.”
 “I love you too.” His lips found yours then, and you melted into the feel of him, savoring how his body started to relax against you.
 “Auston’s an asshole.” Matthew finally said, when the two of you broke apart.
 “Do I even want to know what he said?”
 “Just shit to get me riled up, and it worked.” Your one hand went to the back of his neck, massaging the knotted muscles there. “I’m not stupid. I realize what probably happened between the two of you. I just don’t like hearing it.”
 “We both have pasts, Matthew. We can’t change that, but you’re my future.”
 He gave you a real quick peck to your lips. “And you’re mine. At least I don’t have to deal with him for a couple weeks.”
 You pushed him onto his back before straddling his hips. “Don’t let him get under your skin, babe. When he starts to say something…” you looked him right in the eyes. “And you know he will. Just remind him how you’re the only one I want with me.” You flexed your hips before running your hands up his bare chest. “And in me.” Matthew’s hands went to your waist, where he played with the band of lace on your panties. “You’re more to me than he’ll ever be. Both here,” you taped your heart and then his. “And here.” Lifting your hips, you took your hand and cupped the length of him. His cock instantly hardened under your touch.
 Your words spurred Matthew into action, for the next thing you knew he was ripping your panties, before shimming out of his boxers. His fingers went to your folds, where he found you ready for him. “Fuck you’re so wet.”
 “Only for you Matthew. Only for you.” It was extra reassurance that you knew Matthew needed and tonight you’d give him as many as he needed. He guided your hips down onto his cock and you sighed out with pleasure as he filled you like no one else ever had.
 As you grabbed the hem of your t-shirt Matthew whispered harshly, “Leave it on.” It was one of his Flames shirts; one that had both his name and number on the back. Leaning down you kissed him long and hard, before starting to ride him. It was slow at first, a pace meant to build you both up but not push you over the edge. His hands were everywhere, under your shirt caressing your breasts, wandering down your back to cup your ass, and moving up and down your thighs to quicken your speed.
 Finally, he couldn’t take it any longer and he flipped your bodies so that he loomed over top of you. His thrusts were deep and hard, almost punishing if your body hadn’t wanted him so bad. “You belong to me.” He said as he flexed into you, pushing you up against the headboard.
 “Yes, baby. Only you.”
 “Who?” He asked again and you realized that he was not in the mood to hear any pet names.
 “You, Matthew, you,” you answered knowing that he owned you both body and soul, just as you owned him.
 “That’s right, baby.” Matthew's thrusts were deep and sure, as he knew what would bring you pleasure, and with a few more flexes of his hips, he sent you spiraling out of control, screaming his name.
 “MMMAAATTTTTTTTTTHHHHEEEEEWWW.”
 That was all he needed to catch his high and follow you down, your name on his lips. He rolled onto his side taking you with him; your breaths mingling together as you both calmed. Your nails skimmed down his spine aimless, something you tended to do after sex. Matthew always said he loved the continued intimacy it brought, and tonight it felt like you both needed that. His lips found yours, the kiss loving and tender. “I love you, (Y/N),” Matthew whispered while brushing a stray lock of hair from your face. “And I promise, I won’t let Auston get to me next time.”
 “Good, because you’re the only man I love Matthew, and the team doesn’t need you getting ejected from games because of me.”
 “It won’t happen again.” You truly hoped that it wouldn’t but with Matthew’s temper you never knew.
 It was a little over two weeks later that the Flames were taking on the Leafs, this time at the Saddledome, where you were in attendance. Admittedly, you were a bit nervous on the inside as to what would happen between the love of your life and the once lowlife that you'd briefly called boyfriend. You tried to shake off your nerves with idle chatter with some of the girls, but your eyes always seemed to drift back to where Matthew and Auston were on the ice.
 Matthew for his part stayed away from center ice for warmups, just like he told you he would. It wasn’t until the second period after a blown whistle that Auston finally decided to poke at him. “How’s that girlfriend Tkachuk? You know if I told her I wanted her back she’d leave you in a second.”
 “I doubt that Matthews. She told me you couldn't satisfy her in the bedroom. Something about cumming too soon.” Anger started to radiate across Auston’s face. “You should see a doctor about that.” Matthew skated away, completely ignoring anything Auston would be able to say back.
 The game was tied late in the third once again when Auston tried to rile Matthew up again. Considering he had two assists you understood why they wanted your boyfriend out of the game. “It wasn’t me who had the problem Tkachuk, (Y/N)’s pussy was wider than the Grand Canyon.”
 “Hmm,” Matthew taunted back. “Must be your small pencil dick, because she’s so tight it’s like a vice-grip around me.” Auston took offense and cross-checked Matthew into the boards right as the play began, earning him two minutes in the penalty box. Matthew laughed at him as the ref took him over. Auston wasn’t there for long, as Matthew scored the game-winning goal forty-some seconds into the penalty. You jumped up out of your seat with the rest of the girls cheering and screaming.
 Even though they pulled the goalie, the Leafs couldn’t seem to find the back of the net before the buzzer sounded ending the game. You made your way down to wait outside the tunnel with the rest of the significant others. Most everyone was gone before Matthew finally came out, scooping you up in his arms. “Did you see that baby?”
 “I saw Matty,” you told him, kissing him on the lips. “That goal was impressive.”
 He finally set you back down on your feet. “No babe, that’s not what I meant. I didn’t let him get to me.”
 “Yeah, I saw that too. I’m so proud of you.”
 “Well, he can’t get under my skin about you, when I get to be all over yours.” His hands slid under your sweater and inside your jeans to cup your ass. “Speaking of your skin…let’s go home so I can get you out of all these clothes and see you.”
 You kissed him, long and languidly, before pulling back. “I like that idea. I like it a lot.” The two of you left the arena hands interlaced just as your bodies would be as soon as you got home.  
.
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babymilkawa · 3 years
Note
Sorry if this has already been rone but- could I get Bakugou, Todoroki, Denki and Izuku (separately) with a non-binary s/o who’s quirk is based off of a hyena? They have splotches of lighter skintone on them, freckles, laugh like a hyena, have sharp teeth and eyes like them? And a tail + ears? S/o is really chaotic, they live by the motto “I’ll try anything once,” and are overall very likable yet funky? Extra points if the boys see them in their hero outfit (which is something a little showey💕
-🧸
this is rly interesting anon!!
hyena quirk headcanons with:
bakugou katsuki, todoroki shoto, midoriya izuku, kaminari denki
gn!reader :)
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bakugou katsuki
so at first he was definitely ticked off by how different u were
tbh u kinda reminded him of Mina with ur personality
But he thought ur appearance was very cool
later on in ur relationship, you’d always feel him tracing the shapes of the splotches on ur skin, or softly scratching the space behind ur ears
he thought u looked so badass with those teeth though
u were wild but you weren’t careless
your attacks were precise and carefully planned during practice and he definitely noticed
even before u guys started dating, bakugou had already known almost everything about you just by observing
he noticed how your ears perked up easily
whether it’s excitement or during training
he loved watching how your pupils would dilate and how completely focused you’d look when on the battle field but if you’re just chilling?
your whole body is relaxed
oh and his favorite, favorite part is that if he teases you about things and you deny it, your tail will give it away
like your first kiss for example
he pulled away and with the smuggest grin he said, “not bad, right?”
you had rolled your eyes and looked away, unaware that the tip of your tail was rapidly moving side to side
Usually he’ll point you out
but after that kiss, he was dazed himself, so caught up on the feeling of ur lips, he didn’t even bother telling u that ur tail was betraying its owner
and the first time he saw ur hero costume? oh my g a w d man had to look away
cos damn what r u looking so good for 
literally has to slap himself when no one’s watching so he can focus on the task
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todoroki shoto
so your personality is very different than his
knowing this, you sometimes try to catch him off guard by like fake pouncing on him 
but he never flinches or anything
never does
he prolly already knows ur planning this on the other side of the room smh
todoroki generally doesn’t have a playful side to him but when he’s noticing that you’re being more jumpy than usual he’ll join you cuz why not
but ofc it’s awkward at first
he doesn’t know how to have fun fun
he doesn’t understand ur impulsive decisions which happens a lot
for example, if you’ve accidentally had one sip of caffeine at 6 in the evening, you’re wide awake at 2 am and preparing to rearrange the furniture in ur dorm
he’s right below you, luckily, so he’ll hear all the noise and show up to ur dorm like “why?”
and you’ve got the same answer each time, “why not?”
he figures that he won’t be able to go back to sleep anyways so he helps you move the furniture
one thing that’s great is that he can instantly read your emotion or energy level from your tail
like if you’ve still got to move your night stand, but your tail is starting to droop, he’ll just drag you to bed
he’s tired too and he loves your cuddles even if ur ears tickle his chin a little excuse to be little spoon? I think yes
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midoriya Izuku
your energy s c a r e s him sometimes
being ur partner during training will literally keep him fully alert, for you
but you’re a great partner, you can just be a little reckless sometimes
he soon learns that even if you dive right into the action, you don’t act without thinking
before you guys are even together, he’s already got your whole quirk analysis down in his notebook 
he’ll ask you questions about whether your tail gets in the way or whether your ears help during training and all
sometimes if you guys are just chilling, you’ll catch him staring at you
one day you ask him and he just goes like “no you just look really cool. I hope I'm not being weird though! I don’t mean to!”
“you’re my bf you can stare at me all you want Izuku”
one time, you were sitting down with your friends playing a card game and he was walking by behind you
but suddenly your tail just unconsciously swept the floor and he stepped on it, making you cry out in pain
he felt soooo bad
oml
doesn’t know how to help make it better so he just keeps on apologizing
if it was anybody else, you would’ve pounced on them but he looks genuinely guilty
so lets not make it worse :)
at first, seeing you smile would give him mixed emotions
like you’d go up to his face and flash your teeth and he’d start sweating buckets
you looked adorable don’t get me wrong
but you also looked a little...menacing
kinda like himiko
after a while he got used to it, knowing that you were a really kind person at heart
but since you can be a little wild and you like to have fun, you'll just graze his shoulder or neck with your skin to feel him shiver
you won’t put any pressure that’ll draw blood but it’s fun to hear him whimper 👀
the first time he saw ur hero costume, he start stuttering random nonsense lmAo
“y-y-y/n, wow, uhhh” sweat sweat sweat
yea he’s prolly not gonna get used to that hahHha
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kaminari denki
this boy matches your energy
your always paired up with him during training cos you guys make the best team
like you’re there to keep him from making irrational decisions but you also ignite the fire and make sure the two of you make the most out of the time
even if you guys fail the mission sometime, you always come out laughing and developing new inside jokes
sometimes if you’re laughing, he’ll just turn to look at you with the biggest smile
and admires your tail wagging like a little pup and your teeth glistening under the ceiling lights
he is all up for your impulsive decision making
your #1 supporter
“oh? you wanna have fireworks in the field? me too! let’s go!”
pulls out 20 packs from under his bed
you two hold the best parties ever
and sometimes Iida gets on ur nerves but denki’s there to politely ask him to not be a party pooper and that the door is wide open 👀🚪
y’all get in trouble with Aizawa all the time 
like by now, he’s sick of y'all LMAOOO
someone told him that there’s a hole in the vending machine?
“y/n, Kaminari, come here”
but they weren’t even snitching on you two but it’s sooo obvious who did it hahaha
a lot of running around in the hallways and chasing each other
your so much faster than he is but he loves hearing your laugh echo the place
he clings on to you a lot cos ur soft
he’s usually the little spoon change my mind no u can't but when ur exhausted and all out of energy, he’s there to scratch your back or behind your ears, loving the way your tail wags in your sleep
you guys growl at each other
like playfully but it happens a lot
Midoriya walked in one time and lowk thought a fight was about to break down, tryna separate the two of you
you have an actual growl and a fake cute one, guess which one he likes ;))
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a/n: aaah this was so fun to write!! thank you for requesting <33
bnha masterlist
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babymetaldoll · 3 years
Text
DIWK - Chapter ten: "Set me free my honey bee"
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Word count: 11,6K
Summary: Let's jump 19 months in time and see how painful it has turned for reader and Spencer to hide their feelings for each other. JJ leaves the team, and a new member joins the BAU.
Warnings: Angst and hurt. Fools being assholes. Cursing, of course. Mention of CM cases and spoilers on S06E11.
A/N: Please don't hate me. Just remember things usually look like the shit before they get worst, and then everything is better. I hope.
Masterlist
Chapter one | Chapter two | Chapter three | Chapter four | Chapter five | Chapter six | Chapter seven | Chapter eight | Chapter nine | Chapter ten | Chapter eleven | Chapter twelve | Chapter thirteen | Chapter fourteen | Chapter fifteen |
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(Y/N)'s point of view
Time is a weird thing. I remember when I was in school and time didn't pass fast enough. Semesters were eternal. It felt it had been years by the time summer vacation arrived. The complete opposite happened to me at the BAU. Suddenly, time passed too quickly. A whole year and a half went by in the blink of an eye.
I told Spencer about it, and he sent me a paper published by Professor Adrian Bejan that presented an argument based on the physics of neural signal processing. He hypothesizes that, over time, the rate at which we process visual information slows down, and this is what makes time 'speed up' as we grow older.
My answer was that I thought it happened 'cos as we grew older, we did things that actually gave us joy, which made us feel the time was passing faster than before. So we argued a whole Saturday afternoon about it and created our own theories for that event.
My theory was my personal favorite, 'cos it was the only one that could easily explain why so much time had passed in the BAU, and it felt like it had been just a few weeks.
It hadn't been easy, though. Those nineteen months had been filled with some of the worst situations we had been through as a team.
After I got shot, JJ finally admitted her relationship with Will and got pregnant. That was shocking, the first BAU baby: Henry.
Sadly, Henry was the only little good thing that happened that year. Because to sum it up, a bunch of awful shit happened to all of us: Hotch was in a car explosion that almost killed him. Spencer and Prentiss got trapped in an undercover mission into an underground cult to investigate child abuse, and Emily was beaten up pretty badly. Also, Spencer got infected with anthrax and nearly died. That was probably the most agonizing moment I had lived since the whole Tobias Hankel situation two years earlier.
Also, that year Prentiss had to investigate the case of the death of one of her best friends, and I was in a pretty nasty fight with an unsub that got me out of the field for three weeks. Not to mention, Spencer was shot in the leg.
Hotch was stabbed by the only unsub that has actually won against the BAU: Foyet. He attacked Aaron and got on the lose for months, but we all knew his next move as torture Hotch's family. That's why his ex-wife Haley and his little son Jack had to go into protective custody, and he couldn't see them for months while we tried to catch Foyet.
Things didn't go as planned. And without a doubt, the worst moment that year was the day Haley died. Foyet killed her, and Aaron lost it. He literally killed him with his bare hands the moment he got him. For a solid week, I was sure Aaron Hotchner wouldn't be the unit chief anymore. Strauss actually opened an investigation related to everything that happened that day. But in the end, somehow, she understood the "bloodbath" that had happened in that house was all in Foyet's hands.
However, there's no way to deny that the whole team had changed in many ways after that year. The concept of being a family was now more present than ever. After chasing Foyet for months, we were all onto him as if he was chasing our own family, because he was.
You don't work this kind of job with a team like mine and don't get attached to them. And this goes beyond how in love I was with Spencer. The (Y/N) who first stepped into the BAU, scared to show her true self, was long gone. And despite my deepest fears, letting them in and showing them who I really was had been one of the smartest decisions I have ever made.
Do you want to know which was my stupidest decision? Falling in love with Spencer Reid. It hadn't actually been my choice. I just didn't fight the feeling either. I don't think I could have even if I tried, though. Those nineteen months brought us so close, my mom thought we were living together, and the teasing from our friends was so common we weren't even affected by it.
For Christ Sakes, even Strauss thought we were dating! She forced us to attend a seminar on fraternization, concerned after she realized we always took our vacation together. We had a lot of fun trips, though. First, we visited his mom and had an amazing weekend in Las Vegas. Then we took a few days off after the anthrax incident and went to Hawaii. Picture Spencer Reid in an "all-inclusive," drinking all the coffee and eating all the pastries possible while reading a million books underneath an extra-large umbrella. We had fun that week, did some local touring, but most of all, sleeping in and relaxing. Spencer hates the beach but got those tickets anyway.
Did everybody think we were a couple? Yes
Did it help that we shared rooms, 'cos we were already used to it? No
Did it feel like a honeymoon without sex? Yes
Could I stop thinking about sex with Spencer? No.
And all that led us to the nightmare our relationship was going to become.
Penelope Garcia was drunk. She kept pouring shots and pushing them to us. Emily was wasted as well. But she kept acting like the classy lady she is. Not like JJ. My poor baby had mascara smeared under her eyes after crying for like an hour.
We found out she was leaving the team, and it was a hard blow on us. And by hard, I mean the worst thing that had ever happened to us. We had suffered without JJ when she was on maternity leave. And we struggled without her. Now knowing the Pentagon had taken her away from the BAU was torture.
We had a goodbye party for her at Rossi's, but this was our goodbye girl's night, and neither of us was holding anything back.
We had cried, we had sung sad songs. We drank all the champagne, wine, and vodka we could find. And now, holding our tequila shots, we knew it was time to call it a night.
- "I just love you girls so much,"- JJ whispered, crying- I don't wanna work without you.
- "Boo, come here!!"- I opened my arms and wrapped them around my friend, kissing the top of her hair a few times- "I love you too, and you are going to come back so soon you won't have time to miss us. You'll see. Papa Rossi and Dada Hotch are gonna fix everything."
I was drunk. Seriously drunk. But that wasn't the reason why I was so sweet with JJ. The truth is, I was broken-hearted. Like Penelope and Reid, I didn't manage change very well, and the fact that JJ was forced to leave made me feel frustrated and mad. But most of all, it made me think of every time I had been a little bitch with her during the years. And I regretted each one of them.
- "And we won't be far!"- Emily added and caressed JJ's arm, smiling kindly- "You will still be in town, and we will not leave you alone"- JJ chuckled and nodded.
- "I know, girls. Shit, I love you all so much!"
- "We love you too!"- Penelope sobbed and moved closer, wrapping the three of us in her arms.
- "Please, take care!"- JJ wiped off the tears from her eyes and looked at us- "Emily, don't do anything stupid! Don't rush in the field, and please don't take your fucking vest off!!"
- "I won't! I promise!"
- "You have to live to be Unit chief one day!"- JJ added, and Prentiss widened her eyes, shocked.
- "That's not really my gold."
- "But you'd be queen, baby!!"- Jareau added and turned to Penelope- "And you, please make sure Hotch eats. I kept a stack of granola bars on my desk to keep him fueled during the day. He usually forgets lunchtime and skips dinner, so..."
- "Don't worry, JJ,"- Penelope nodded, and we all felt our heartbreak a little thinking about all the things JJ did in her daily basics to take care of the team, and we didn't even know.
- "How are we going to survive without you?"- I mumbled, pouting. JJ chuckled and held my hand.
- "You are a rock, and you will do a fantastic job keeping this team together. Just, please, can you and Spencer start dating now?"
I wide opened my eyes and stared at JJ. The comment surprised me. I shouldn't, 'cos the whole "you and Spencer should start dating" joke was getting old. Only this time, JJ wasn't joking. She held both my hands and looked right into my eyes.
- "(Y/N), he loves you"- I was about to argue with her, but she covered my mouth with her Cheetos smelling hand.
- "Don't say a word! Spencer loves you so much you really must be blind not to see it. And I know you love him too. It's implied in all the little things you do for him every day. So don't take it for granted. Don't think this will last forever 'cos look at me! A week ago, I was happily working at the BAU, and now I'm drinking at my goodbye party! So don't waste any more time! You are in love with Spencer, and he loves you! It doesn't take a profiler to see it. So please! Act on it!"
There was a dramatic silence after. I didn't know how to break it. I could just joke around, but somehow, it didn't feel right. It had been too quiet for too long, and that made everything harder to deny. Finally, Emily put her hand on mine, just like JJ was still doing, and smiled at me.
- "There's nothing to be ashamed of, (Y/N). You are not the first person to fall for her best friend."
- "And the Junior G Man loves you so much,"- Penelope added, landing her hand on our hands too.
- "As his friend"- I corrected and sighed. I guess that was it. After three years, I could probably start facing my feelings in front of my friends.
- "No, (Y/N)"- Garcia tried to argue, but I shook my head and stood up, 'cos all that sudden attention and affection was bothering me.
- "PG, I was in Hawaii with the man, sharing a room, walking around in a bikini, and he didn't do anything."
- "That's because he is shy!"- Emily excused him right away.
- "My bikini leaves pretty much nothing to the imagination. Do you know what he said when he first saw me on it?"- I looked at my friend and poured us another round of tequila- "And I quote, "I don't think I brought enough books. This one is too interesting."
I air quoted with my fingers as we spoke, and the three of them looked at me, speechless. I made my point and drank my shot, feeling the alcohol burning down my throat. My friends opened their mouths but didn't produce a word. I sighed and looked at them.
- "But he hates the beach, and he took you there anyway,"- Emily pointed out
- "Did he give you his speech about how he hates sandy food?"- JJ asked me, and I chuckled, nodding.
- "And about pink skin, limited and unengaging topography, and of course, the real reason he hates the beach: drug-resistant bacteria spread by seagull feces."
- "And the man took you to the beach!"- Penelope argued.
- "But he didn't do anything! he didn't make his move, didn't even hold my hand!!"- I nearly shouted- "That's why, among a lot of reasons, is how I know Spencer is not interested in me! If only I'd tell you all the shit we've been through!"
- "Please!! Tell us!!"- Garcia begged and grabbed one of my legs- "I won't live another day 'cos I won't be able to deal with the mystery!"
- "No! 'cos you are gonna tell Morgan"- I slurred- "And he is going to embarrass and tease my honey bunny, and my honey bunny is gonna get all nervous and nervous around me, and we are never going to..."- I stopped talking and looked at my friends. I was sharing too much.
- "(Y/N)?"- Prentiss looked at me, but I just shook my head and looked down.
- "I think I better go home."
- "No, you can't drive like this,"- JJ argued immediately and held my hand- "I'm not gonna let you go intoxicated. Will is gonna come pick me up, and we'll drop you in your place."
I nodded at her and stayed still. My friends smiled at me, and slowly very slowly, I leaned on JJ's shoulder and rested my head on it.
- "I love you, boo,"- I whispered, and she giggled- "I don't think I'll stay sane without you there with us anymore."
- "Hotch is gonna manage to get her back,"- Penelope assured me, and I just nodded.
- "Meanwhile, we won't replace you, and if anyone tries to push someone new into the team, we are not gonna take them,"- I added, feeling JJ's hand holding mine.
- "Don't be mean with people just 'cos you miss me. If there's a new teammate, it won't be their fault I was pushed out of the BAU."
- "But, JJ,"- I tried to argue, but she shook her head right away.
- "No, (Y/N). You can't be mean to people just because."
Clearly, my friend hoped I could be the better person. The simple question was: did I want to be the better person? Right there, drunk and sad, the answer was no.
Spencer's point of view
I kept finding myself awake at four in the morning, walking around my apartment, not able to read or to write anything. For the last months, at least twice or three times each week, I would stay awake, no matter how tired I felt, and I would haunt my own apartment, listening to my vinyl records.
The sudden lack of sleep wasn't really something weird in me. I have always been nocturnal. Besides, the news of JJ's departure had hit us all pretty hard. I had already shared my share of tears and tried to manage the fury that caused me to know we were helpless to the government's decisions. There was nothing we could do, neither us, Hotch, or even Strauss. Not that she would if she could.
My family was in crisis, and all we could do was hope for the best and stay together.
It was scary losing JJ. It made me think of all the things that could go wrong every day on the field daily. It was bad that we could get hurt or even die on our work. But that they divided us that way made no sense. Like Rossi said: our loss was someone else's winning, and in the FBI, no one cared if we lost.
I poured myself a cup of herbal tea and inhaled the smell of it. It smelled like home. Like (Y/N). She had some of her favorite teas in my apartment. She had a bunch of all her things there, actually. When mom visited, she thought we were living together. She is still sure we are dating and that I don't wanna tell her. I don't longer argue with her about it. It's useless, and it somehow feels good to imagine in another world. It was actually true.
That year my feelings for my best friend had grown in a way that made it all more difficult to deal with. I didn't just love her. I was in love with her. She was in everything I did, in each and every one of my thoughts. I could hear her laughter in my head, like a record playing my favorite song over and over again.
When she was out there in the field, I couldn't stop running all the probabilities of her getting hurt, and most of the time, I would do my best to keep her safe, knowing it could somehow interfere with the case.
Hotch had called me to his office a few times, aware something was going with me. He could read it on my face, I guess. It was scary to know everybody could read my feelings for (Y/N) but her. And it was sad to think of the worst: that she knew how much I loved her, but she didn't feel the same, and she was just being my friend 'cos she was never going to be anything else but my friend.
I drank my tea and hummed the song that sounded in my house at four in the morning: Love is a losing game. Seemed pretty accurate for my mood. I remember the day I got that vinyl. We were out with (Y/N), Frank, and Lu, looking for a present for Mikey's birthday, and we ended up in a record store, getting a million vinyl records for ourselves.
- "Are you getting all those?"- (Y/N) asked me and looked at the seven albums in my hand.
- "Yes, why? I can't?"- I answered and raised an eyebrow.
- "Sassy!"- she giggled and grabbed them- "You can get all the albums you want. But I have to give my approval first. No, you are not getting this!"- she grabbed The Beatles' Revolver and left it aside.
- "What? Why? It's only one I need to complete my collection."
- "I know, but when you get it, you'll force me to listen to it, and I don't like the Beatles,"- she argued, and I just shook my head, taking the album again.
- "Sorry, chipmunk, I'm buying it."
- "Fine. I won't go to your house for the next couple of weeks then."
- "Why don't you tell me which album you wanna listen to when you are in my house then?"- I looked at her, smiling at me and looking for a record on the shelves.
- "This! You need some Amy in your life."
And I did. Now, at four in the morning, all alone walking around, I could see her in my apartment, singing along to her favorite songs while cooking dinner, feeling at home. I wished she was there, with me, doing nothing. Watching tv, or reading. Just hanging out. I knew it wasn't healthy being in love with my friend, seeing her every day, and also hanging out with her every chance I got. But even when I knew she was never going to love me the way I did, I was going to take every chance I had to enjoy her company. If that was all I was going to get.
My phone took me from my thoughts, and I quickly walked to my room to get it. I thought it was Hotch announcing a case, but it was JJ.
- "Hey! JJ, everything ok? Is Henry ok?"
- "Yes, hi Spence. We are all ok."
- "It's four in the morning."
- "Sorry I woke you up... I just..." - she made a pause and sighed at the other side of the line- "Spencer, you know I love you."
- "I love you too. You are one of my best friends. Is everything ok?"
- "Yes, I just wanted to... remember a bunch of years ago, when you asked me to that football game?"
A million years had passed since the one and only time I had asked JJ out. It was the only move I tried to do on her, and I failed incredibly. It was awkward, and she had no idea it was a date, so she invited Garcia to come along. I was so embarrassed I never even mentioned that single event ever again, and our friendship grew after.
- "Yes, I remember, JJ. Why?"
- "When you asked me out, did you have a crush on me?"
- "JJ, are you drunk?"- I had to ask 'cos that conversation was starting to scare me.
- "Yes, but that's not why I'm talking about this. Just answer the questions, Spence. When you asked me out on that date, did you have a crush on me?"
- "Yes, I did."
I closed my eyes, embarrassed to face feelings that were far forgotten.
- "You see, I had a crush on you too back then,"- JJ said and chuckled- "But neither of us acted on it, and life continued, and now I'm in love with Will, and we have a baby, and you are his godfather."
Of all the things I thought I would listen to that day, never in a million years, I imagined I would hear JJ drunk telling me she had a crush on me when we first met.
- "Now, do you want that to happen again?"- she asked, and I didn't get it, 'cos I was still trying to process what I had just heard. So I might have had a relationship with her if only I had said something, act on it. Kiss her, ask her out again?
- "What?"
- "Spence. Do you want to miss the chance to be with the girl you like?"
- "No, but JJ, what are you talking about?"
She sighed, frustrated, and used that tone of voice with me, that very maternal specific tone of voice she used to explain things she knew were hard for me to follow.
- "When you like someone, Spence, you have to tell her. 'Cos sometimes, life gets in the way, and if you don't do what you have to do to be happy, no one will do it for you."
- "Are you ok, JJ?"
- "Yes, Spence, I'm ok. I'm home with Will. We just got here after dropping (Y/N) off her place."
- "How was she?"
- "She might have had a few too many drinks, but she'll be ok in the morning. Maybe she'd appreciate it if you brought her coffee and donuts."
- "She doesn't like donuts,"- I corrected her- "She likes cupcakes and brownies."
- "Sorry. Coffee and cupcakes... just tell her you love her, Spence. She deserves to know."
I held my breath and closed my eyes. I didn't get why JJ was telling me that, but I knew I didn't want to talk about it. So I said good night and hung up.
What was the point of telling me we could have been a couple of years had passed already? Why didn't she say a thing before? Or even better, why didn't she ever say a word about it at all? So I missed the chance to be happy with her. Great. One more regret to add to my list.
I laid on my bed and tried to remember that date. I was so nervous that day, my hands shook inside my pockets as I walked to JJ's door. She looked beautiful that day, especially when she looked at me and announced she had invited Penelope to join us.
That was when I realized she would never see me as a proper date, just like a friend. And I learned to make my peace with that over the years. My crush for JJ lasted a few more months, but it vanished when I fell for (Y/N). What if she had never joined the team? Would I have been in love with JJ forever? Jeniffer always made me feel like her little brother, and I guess that's the mechanic that works for us. We were good friends ever since we met, and yes, I had a crush on her, but we work more like siblings than anything else.
What was the point in telling me I had missed a chance with her now? I just couldn't see it.
(Y/N)'s point of view
The next few weeks were us trying to survive without JJ. The team was making the best it could, but it was hard. Penelope took the lead during the second case without JJ. She turned into our tech analyst and communication liaison, only to collapse under the pressure of having two roles.
No one was going to replace JJ. We all knew it. Literally, no one, 'cos Hotch decided he and Garcia were going to split the job, and we were all going to collaborate as much as we could, 'cos we were a team. A family. And that's what families do.
And families were the target of the unsub we were hunting the day everything changed. Again. I hadn't recovered from the departure of JJ when Rossi and Hotch walked to the bullpen and introduced us to Agent Trainee Ashley Seaver.
My nemesis.
- "Agent trainee Seaver"- Rossi smiled at her like a proud father and looked at us as we stood up, wondering who she was- "Supervisory Special Agent Prentiss, (Y/L/N), and Morgan."
- "I've heard so much about the three of you,"- she said with the sweetest tone of voice I had ever heard. Something about that felt odd.
- "I hope it is all good- Morgan flirted right away, of course."
- "Very, sir."
- "Anything specific? I mean about me in particular?"- I turned to him and failed in holding back my chuckles.
- "Please, don't encourage him, or he will never stop talking,"- I said, and Derek elbowed me playfully. Seaver smiled at us and even blushed a little bit. She was nervous.
- "Agent Seaver is on loan to us from the academy while she is remedial training with an injury."
Hotch announced. And my stomach tightened right away. There was something wrong with that whole scene. I could feel it in my guts. But I didn't know why?
- "Concussion. Hand to hand got a little out of control."- Seaver explained and kept a silly smile on her face.
- "How's the other guy?"- Prentiss asked.
- "Don't ask."
- "I was remediated in the academy also,"- Spencer said, walking over us, and suddenly I understood why I had a bad feeling about everything.
- "Agent Seaver, Dr. Reid."
As soon as I heard Rossi say those words, there was a part of me who just wanted to hold Spencer's hand and push him away from her, even before they could say hi. She looked at him like he was eye candy, and I clenched my knuckles as I stared at the scene.
- "Uhm... What was your issue?"- she asked him, and I could see the pink on her cheek intensifying as he looked at her, confused.
- "What was my issue? Marksmanship, physical training, obstacle course, Hogan's alley. You know, pretty much everything that wasn't technically book related. They ultimately had to make exceptions to allow me into the field."
Seaver stared at him and kept nodding, though I wondered if she was listening to what he had said. Spencer looked exceedingly handsome that day. His hair was very short for the first time in years, and he still had no idea how to comb it, so it was all over the place, making him look as hot as fuck.
I was so in love with him, I didn't know what to do with those feelings at all. It was hard working with Reid at that point. I just wanted to kiss him.
- "Agent Seaver's going to accompany us to New Mexico,"- Aaron announced, and I couldn't help but question him right away.
- "She is?"
- "As a consultant."- he assured me.
- "On?"- Morgan raised an eyebrow and looked at Hotch, wondering what a trainee agent could help us with as a consultant.
- "She has a unique perspective,"- Rossi tried to explain, but it sounded like bullshit.
- "They don't know?"- Seaver turned to the elderly agents, and they shook their heads.
- "Well, we weren't sure how you wanted to,"- David whispered.
- "Uh... Seaver's not my original last name. It's my mother's maiden name. Mine used to be Beauchamp. My father is Charles Beauchamp"- Ashley was supposed to explain the circumstances of her consultancy to the whole team, but she just looked at Spencer as she spoke.
- "As in the Redmond ripper, Charles Beauchamp?"- he asked her, and suddenly, it clicked. It was like my whole body was telling me I couldn't be close to her for a reason.
- "That's him,"- she whispered and kept her eyes on my best friend as he continued talking.
- "He killed 25 women over 10 years in rural North Dakota. I think that you caught him, right, Rossi?"- and David nodded.
- "Hotch was on that team, too."
- "Based on her life experience, we were hoping that agent Seaver might recognize something in the family dynamics inside the community that could be helpful. We have a plane waiting,"- Hotch announced and looked at us, but none of us said a word.
I kept my eyes glued at my feet the whole time Aaron talked. Then, Spencer nodded and walked with Seaver and Rossi out to the hangar. I couldn't even blink. I think I was in shock.
- "Her father was a serial killer?"- Prentiss asked Hotch, not getting what he was thinking.
- "That's definitely a different set of parameters,"- Morgan added. Neither of them was sold on the idea, which made me feel a little bit better.
- "I don't want her presence to get us sidetracked. It's a long shot that she's gonna see anything helpful. We work it like any other case,"- Hotch was clear, and Prentiss and Morgan nodded.
- "You got it."
But I disagreed with that.
- "(Y/N), is everything ok?"- Aaron asked me, and I tried my best to lie and be cool.
- "Yeah, I'm ok."
- "Ok. We work this like any other case. Wheels up in twenty."
But everything was far from being ok.
I sat next to Spencer on the jet, and we reviewed the case files together. Hotch briefed us, and we all pretended it wasn't weird having Seaver there. And I guess we had to pretend it wasn't odd knowing her dad was a serial killer.
- "You are very young, (Y/N),"- she said and smiled at me. She was sitting across from Spencer and me, and you could tell she had been trying to join the conversation for a few minutes now.
-" Twenty eight,"- I answered and looked at the files again.
- "And you, doctor?"
- "You can call me Reid. I'm twenty eight too,"- Spencer cut her a short, awkward, and nervous smile, and I turned to him.
- "Honey, did I leave my Mets jersey at your house?"- it was the only question that came to my mind at that minute. It was completely random, but somehow it showed a part of our dynamic that Ashley didn't know. Our friendship. Our closeness.
- "Yes, I found it last night,"- he answered and sipped his coffee- "I was gonna bring it over, but then I remembered you always borrow all my sweaters when you are home or when you stay over, so I thought maybe it was a good idea to keep it at my place."
- "I don't know, Batsy. It's my favorite sweatshirt- I raised an eyebrow, and I'm pretty sure I even flirted a little bit."
- "So? You need to keep one there."
- "But I like wearing your clothes when we are at your place. It's extra large and extra comfy."
- "Is that why you keep taking my sweaters back to your house?"- he asked and chuckled- "Last Sunday, I found four of my sweaters in your closet."
- "Sorry, I'm not even sorry,"- I said and laughed- "And what were you doing in my closet?"
- "Lucy, Ricky, can we focus on the case?"- Morgan asked and waved at us with one silly grin on his face- "We love hearing your adorable daily adventures, but we've got a psycho killer to catch."
Spencer blushed and flustered right away. I stuck out my tongue at Morgan and just shook my head. The way Seaver looked at Reid was still driving me nuts, but I felt I had shown her he was mine, childishly.
It's embarrassing to think that's not the most childish thing I did around her those days. Or in the weeks to follow. But I didn't like Ashley, and I didn't want her around my team. And it wasn't just her constant flirting with Spencer. It was the fact her father had killed my mother's sister when she was in college, and I was making my best effort to keep that fact aside from work. My personal life had to stay out of the FBI, especially when working a case.
I had to do some serious mental work trying to remember it wasn't Ashley's fault her father was a sick bastard. She hadn't hurt my family, and her father had ruined her life too. It wasn't her fault.
But one thing is knowing. Another thing is being rational about it. Spoiler: I wasn't so rational about it.
- "So, (Y/N). Do you like working at the BAU?"- Ashley asked me and looked at me through the rearview mirror. We were in the SUV, and Prentiss was driving. I was in the back seat, trying to ignore her, but she made it impossible.
- "Yes, very much,"- I answered and nodded, not taking my eyes from the window.
- "Everybody is very friendly,"- Seaver added and made a pause. I don't know if she wanted me to say something or if she was trying to find a way to say what she wanted to say.
- "Yes, they are,"- I humored her, and she quickly responded.
- "Are you and Spencer dating?"- I could feel the blood raising my cheeks as she spoke. And Prentiss flashed me a look through the mirror as Ashley continued talking.
- "I'm sorry. I don't mean to be rude. I just wondered because of the fraternization policy."
- "Right. Sure. Of course."
Those three words were meant to let Ashley know I wasn't buying her bullshit, So I literally spit them.
- "Spencer is my best friend. We are not dating."
Facing that simple truth had never been harder before, especially after how I saw Ashley's face light up.
- "You just seem to be so close."
- "Oh, they are close,"- Emily smiled at me and winked- "They are so close, they sometimes freak us out."
- "We freak you out?"- I raised an eyebrow and carefully hit her arm, pretending to be upset. But honestly, I was glad she was teasing me.
- "I am just saying, we are all pretty suspicious about you two. I am actually surprised you didn't share rooms tonight. They usually share rooms."- Emily explained to Seaver.
- "He was paired with Morgan,"- I pouted and looked at my phone. I thought maybe I could send him a funny text. I actually wanted to hang out with him.
- "He is very nice,"- Ashley added- "I mean, everybody is nice."
- "Yes, you mentioned it"
I was clearly not being nice. Seaver nodded and looked at the files again. I assumed she was trying to find a way to keep asking about Spencer, and I was making my best not to kill her.
- "Working with a genius must be somehow intimidating,"- she said after a few minutes. Damn it, she wasn't going to let that subject go.
- "It's fun working with Spencer,"- Prentiss said, trying to humor Seaver. And mostly, I guess trying to ease my mood and keep me from killing the trainee agent.
- "I'm sure it is,"- Seaver added. I hated her.
- "He is more than just a genius, he is a nerd."- Emily pointed out and chuckled at her words, making Seaver giggle too. I looked at my book again, but I knew I wasn't going to be able to concentrate on it at all. He was my nerd. Mine.
- "Well, it's very refreshing to be with a group who trusts and works so well together,"- she added- "I had never felt less judged and more welcome in my entire life."
I know I should have felt sorry for her. But I honestly couldn't. That was the day I realized I wasn't the good person I thought I was. There was a part of me that was a scumbag. I'm guessing knowing that is pretty helpful and positive 'cos you can work on your flaws. But I wasn't planning on working on anything at that minute, though. I just wanted to break Seaver's face.
Spencer's point of view
I didn't like working without JJ. I've never been good with change, and that was a massive alteration of our routine. I missed her, and adding Ashley to the team made things even weirder for me, even for a case. I didn't want to be judgemental, but her father was a serial killer. Of course, that would make things weird.
Besides, everybody kept bugging me, teasing me, trying to see if I liked Seaver. Penelope called while we were on the case and started taunting me, saying she knew I thought Ashley was cute. I could see she was beautiful, but I couldn't see her that way. And I didn't want anyone to say those kinds of things around (Y/N).
Why did I care so much?
I didn't want to face it 'cos I knew it was completely platonic, but I didn't want (Y/N) to think I had a crush on Seaver. I knew my best friend didn't have romantic feelings for me, and I also knew I wasn't going to make a move on her or anything. But I didn't want things to change more than they already had. And most of all, I didn't want anything to alter my dynamic with (Y/N).
But at the same time, somehow, it felt everything was already different between us.
- "Hey, honey bunny,"- (Y/N) walked to me and handed me a cup of coffee- "I thought you might need one of these."
- "You are a lifesaver,"- I whispered and sipped the cup. It was perfect.
We were on the jet on our way back home. The whole team was mostly quiet. The mood was weird. Ashley had done something quite reckless earlier and nearly got herself killed. She walked to the unsub's house all alone, not knowing he was our guy. She almost died, and none of us can even imagine what went through her head to do such a thing.
Rossi and Hotch walked to her. (Y/N) looked at me, and I could read on her face that both of us knew what was going to happen.
Ashley was alone when David sat in front of her, and Hotch stood in the middle of the aisle. Maybe that had been insensitive of us. Neither of us tried to contain her. Neither of us really knew her that well. Or at all, as a matter of fact.
- "You were not supposed to go off on your own."- Hotch went straight to the point.
- "I know,"- she whispered, and I could see how (Y/N)'s face changed. I tried to read her, but all I was able to see was... anger? I had to be wronged. She had no reason to be mad at Ashley.
- "You could have been killed,"- Hotch crossed his arms on his chest and stared at her.
- "I know that, too."
- "Why, Ashley? You're smarter than that"- Rossi sounded like a worried father. I didn't look at him 'cos I kept my eyes on (Y/N)'s, still trying to read her emotions. But what I saw made no sense. She really looked like she was angry at Ashley. Like she hated her.
- "I never got to apologize to any of the victims. The families of the women my father killed. I thought if I could just apologize to one family that had been hurt that way..."
And that was when (Y/N) snapped. She jumped from her seat and walked to Seaver. Aaron and David looked at her surprised, and Morgan turned to me, taking off his headphones. Neither he nor Prentiss got what was happening until that moment.
- "Ok. Shoot!"- (Y/N) sat right in front of Seaver, next to David, and looked at her. But she didn't get it.
- "What? What are you talking about?"
- "You just said you wanted to apologize to one of the families. So go ahead. Try."
The silence on the jet was so deep and awkward it felt no one was ever going to talk again.
- "I'm sorry, (Y/N). But I don't get what you are implying,"- Ashley's voice was a whisper. I knew she was sad and affected, embarrassed even. But I also knew (Y/N), and I could read it on her face. She wasn't joking.
- "You said you wanted to apologize to the family of one of your dad's victims, so go ahead. Apologize to me."
My first instinct was to stand up, which I did. But I froze and didn't take a step closer to (Y/N) when I noticed the severe and cold look in her eyes. I didn't know what she was talking about. But I knew she wasn't bluffing.
- "Why should I... apologize to you?"- Ashley asked her, and her voice broke at a certain point, probably scared of the answer.
- "Your dad killed my mother's older sister. She was in college,"- (Y/N) spit each word with hate and looked at Ashley, waiting for her reply. But Seaver didn't know what to do. She widened her eyes and stayed still. She barely kept her breathing steady.
- "(Y/N), maybe we should let Seaver rest,"- Hotch landed a hand on her shoulder, but my friend shook her head.
- "No, Hotch. By making that choice, she put everyone at risk,"- (Y/N) didn't take her eyes from Ashley as she spoke- "As far as I remember when you are at the academy, they teach you that in the field, we are responsible to and for your team."
- "(Y/N)... I had no idea..."- Ashley tried to apologize, I could see it, but it was clear she wasn't going to win that argument- "I am so sorry."
- "I don't know, Seaver. Did you think saying "sorry" would make those families feel better? 'Cos it ain't working here. "Sorry" won't make my mom stop feeling guilty about what happened. And, if things had gotten ugly back there, "sorry" wouldn't have made your mistake go away in case anyone would have gotten hurt. So no. Sorry doesn't help. Maybe it can ease your conscience, but when you really fuck it up, it never makes things better."
(Y/N) stood up and walked back to her seat in front of me. I let her pass and didn't say a word. I knew she wouldn't want to talk about it there. And, of course, Seaver didn't say a word. She just stood up and walked to the back of the jet, to the bathroom. Rossi and Hotch looked at each other and then looked at me.
David poured a glass of whiskey and walked to (Y/N) slowly. He didn't say a word, he just handed it to her, and she just took it and sipped it with shaky hands.
- "Thanks,"- she whispered, and Rossi nodded. Hotch raised an eyebrow, and for a moment, I thought he was going to say something, but he didn't. He just walked to his seat and opened a case file.
I moved back to my seat and opened my satchel. I had run out of candies earlier that day, so I didn't have much to give to her that could make her smile. So I picked a book and handed it to her. She took it and smiled at me kindly. I knew she was fighting back the tears, and I am sure she has held back all the emotions than being with the daughter of the man who killed her aunt since she knew who Seaver was. And she managed to do the job well. I was proud of her.
- "Wanna grab something to eat when we reach DC?"- I whispered, but for the first time ever, she shook her head.
- "I'm gonna have to catch a rain check for that dinner. I think I wanna go straight to my bed today, honey."- she sipped her glass again, and I nodded.
- "Don't worry, next time."
I was waiting for the train to go back home later that night when I saw Seaver sitting at a bench at the station, staring at her hands on her lap. I didn't see her leaving the BAU, though to be honest, I was really focused on finishing my paperwork to go home. (Y/N) had left as soon as we reached DC, but I had stayed a little longer.
I hesitated for a few seconds before I took a few steps closer and waved at Seaver. She looked at me surprised, as soon as she saw me, but didn't move. I smiled, trying to look friendly, and sat next to her.
- "Hi. What are you doing here?"- I asked her, and she shrugged.
- "I was going to go home, but I think I sat here half an hour ago and haven't been able to move,"- I turned to her and shook my head.
- "Do you want to eat something?"- after what had happened at the jet, I figured Ashley wasn't feeling so good, and maybe talking with someone could help her. She looked at me and blushed; I don't know why. But at least, she smiled and nodded.
- "Great, pizza?"
- "Pizza sounds good."
We were waiting for our food and making small talk. I kept giving Ashley pizza facts to fill the silence 'cos it was weird hanging out with Ashley. I didn't know her, really. We had worked a case together, but that didn't mean I knew her. And, of course, we had the whole jet incident. I felt a little guilty about what had happened, though it wasn't my fault at all in retrospect. I just felt like it was my job cheering her up a little bit after everything she had gone through.
- "How do you do it?"- she asked me all of a sudden- "How do you deal with the pressure of this job?"
- "You get used to it, I guess. I don't know if it's a good thing to get used to, but... it comes with the job, I think,"- I didn't know if I was doing ok comforting her. Then again, I have never been particularly good at it. Not then, not now.
- "Did you always dream about doing this?"- she asked me, and her eyes locked into mine in a way that made me feel slightly uncomfortable.
- "Y... yes. Ever since I was a kid, catching the bad guys,"- Seaver nodded and sipped her coke- "You? Why did you get into the academy?"
I regretted my question right after I asked, just 'cos I realized she might have done it to understand her father's behavior. It was only apparent that had shaped her actions.
- "I guess you know that..."- Ashley answered and smiled, her eyes looking straight into mine. I know I blushed. She is a beautiful woman, though I wasn't thinking about her that way. It was an odd feeling being observed that way.
I was glad our pizza made it to the table, and we were forced to stop talking, and I could focus on anything else but her. Not that I didn't want to look at her, but... I think the right way to explain it is to call it "uneasy." That's how I felt. I wanted to be friendly with her, she had a horrible experience consulting with the team, and I was sure she wasn't really having a good day.
- "This might sound weird, but... do you think I can call you sometime?"- Ashley asked after a few minutes. We were eating and talking about nothing important. I nearly chook at her words and looked at her, nodding.
- "Sure, why?"- I didn't mean to be rude. I just didn't know why she might need to talk to me again.
- "I just think maybe you could help me with a few assignments at the academy."
- "Yeah, of course."
Ashley Seaver smiled and nodded at me, pleased. She took a sip of Sprite, and I could read her, trying to find the words to continue speaking.
- "I'm glad. I was sure you were going to say no."
- "Why?"- I furrowed my brows, confused- "I'm not a big fan of phones, but I can handle a casual phone call."
- "No, I just didn't think your girlfriend would like... I mean, I think (Y/N) hates me, and as her boyfriend, I thought you... would... I don't know."
- "I'm, we are... we,"- I was completely flustered as I tried to rearrange my thoughts. Seaver looked at me innocently and waited for my words.
- "(Y/N) isn't my girlfriend"- it bothered me to admit that simple fact. Why? 'Cos it hurt to think we looked like a couple, but we weren't. Why did Seaver think we were together?
- "Really? But..."
- "She is my best friend,"- I explained poorly. She nodded and hesitated before saying what she was thinking. It was obvious she was trying to arrange the words in her head.
- "It's just that you two... sorry, I'm overstepping,"- Ashley blushed and shook her head- "She is... strong."
- "Yes, very."
- "I think I started with the wrong foot with her."
- "Well, I don't mean to justify anything, but if your father hurt,"- I made a pause, trying to find a way to say it that wasn't so painful.
- "Killed. My father killed her aunt,"- she corrected me with a cold and monotonous tone of voice. I just nodded and sipped my water.
- "She is an amazing person,"- I don't know if I was trying to excuse (Y/N)'s earlier behavior or if I just loved her so much I needed to tell people how awesome she was.
- "I'm sure you will pass this,"- I assured her- "Once you get to know her, and she gets to know you."
- "I don't think she will give me that chance. Besides, I was just clear to assist with only one case."
- "If you want to stay, you can request your remedial training be here. And if Hotch approves it, I could talk to (Y/N). I'm sure she will like to know you better."
Why did I say all that? I had no idea.
- "Thank you, Spence. You are really sweet,"- Ashley moved closer and held my hand. I stayed very still, absolutely awkward.
- "Yeah, I don't... like... holding hands,"- I quickly moved it away and tried to smile at her. She stayed still, not understanding my reaction but trying to act normal.
- "Sorry."
- "That's ok. I'm a germaphobe, that's all."
After pizza, we left the place and said goodnight. I told Ashley I was weary (which was, in fact, the truth) and got her a cab to take her home. After that, I walked to my place. I felt like I needed to be alone for a while. My head was overwhelmed, and in the latest couple of weeks, I had severe trouble sleeping.
I had migraines that nearly blinded me. I was scared they meant I could develop the first signs of schizophrenia, like mom, 'cos they were coming more and more often. It wasn't that bad yet, the light didn't hurt my eyes, and I didn't have any sign of hallucination, but still, I knew it could be serious.
I tried to think of a reason why I might be having those severe headaches. I was eating correctly, mostly 'cos (Y/N) forced me to eat. No, she didn't force me, but she made sure I had all my meals at work, not just coffee. And usually, at the weekends, we would spend our time together, and she was a fantastic cook. So it wasn't an alimentary issue.
I wasn't sleeping well. That wasn't new, but it was getting serious. I wrote and read a lot at night 'cos I couldn't fall asleep until late. I didn't know why. I just couldn't rest. My body ached, and my brain wouldn't sleep. The only nights I could actually get some rest were the ones when (Y/N) stayed with me. It was a blessing when Hotch paired us to share rooms, 'cos I could easily fall asleep when she was around. Her presence soothed me in a way that I didn't understand. Let me put it this way, I know it might sound cheesy, but the beating of her heart set the rhythm for my own, and at night it would bring me peace.
I reached home that night and sighed. I knew I wasn't going to rest easy. (Y/N) wasn't there with me. So I made myself a cup of herbal tea, (Y/N) had a lot of those in my house, and I drank them when I missed her. The smell coming from the cup made me feel like she was close.
How pathetic I had become! But I could only share those thoughts with myself. No one knew I had feelings for her, and I was going to deny it till the end, no matter what had JJ said. I couldn't take that phone call from my mind, and on those sleepless nights, I kept overthinking and overanalyzing everything.
I got into bed with a few books and my cup of herbal tea. I took a look at my cell phone, two new messages.
- "I miss u"
(Y/N) sent, and a warm feeling spread on my chest as I imagined her whispering those words as I read them
- "Breakfast tomorrow before work?"
- "See you at seven-thirty."
I typed and sent it.
What could ever happen if I told her how much in love I am with her? I would lose her, and I'd be alone. She didn't feel that way for me. It was a fact. I was just glad she was my best friend, and I could share everything with her. Was I pathetic? Yes, very, but in a way, it felt it was just all I deserved. Not more, not less. Just being in love with a girl who didn't love me back.
At least she wasn't dating Paul anymore. I hated that guy.
(Y/N)'s point of view
Spencer was waiting for me outside our usual coffee shop, already holding two cups of coffee. His short hair looked dreamy as she smiled and took off his sunglasses. It had to be illegal being that hot. But, seriously, how didn't he get laid? He was fucking dreamy. In the four years we had been best friends, I saw Spencer in many hairstyles, and each of them made him look like a model.
Falling in love with Spencer Reid had been a process I hadn't actually been fully aware of. But I was completely conscious I needed to hide those feelings from him and from everybody at the BAU.
Ok, fine, I had somehow faced part of those feelings in front of my drunk best buddies at Penelope's house, but I never actually confirmed anything. I had just... shared some of my frustrations, I guess.
- "Good morning, honey bunny,"- I smiled and sighed as I stood in front of Spencer, watching him grin back at me and hand me one of the coffee cups.
- "Good morning, chipmunk. Did you get some rest?"
- "Yes, I fell asleep as soon as I reached my bed. I was exhausted."
- "I'm glad you are fully rested."
- "What did you do yesterday?"
- "Nothing,"- he answered quickly and turned around- "I got you a carrot muffin to go."
- "Thank you so much. I'm starving. I didn't even have dinner yesterday."
- "Really?"
- "I told you, I reached home and crawled into my bed."
We walked outside the coffee shop in silence. Spencer bit his donuts, and I ate my muffin. It was nice and calming being with him doing domestic things in life.
I hated how much in love I was with him 'cos I knew I had to shake that feeling away. He was never going to have feelings for me. I was a regular human being, and Spencer Walter Reid was a genius. He deserved better, he was actually never to think about me that way, and I refused to ruin our friendship with those feelings.
- "So, Comic-con is coming. What are we doing this year?"- I asked as I drove us to Quantico.
- "I was thinking we should do something classic,"- he looked at me, nearly beaming on his seat- "We haven't done Star Wars yet."
- "Really?"- I frowned, confused- "All these years? Are you sure?"
- "(Y/N), eidetic memory,"- he argued, and I chuckled- "So, how do you feel about Leia?"
- "Do I have to be Leia 'cos I'm a girl?"- I asked him, and he flustered right away.
- "What? No, you can be whoever you want to be. I was just, it came to my mind... I didn't,"- I giggled and looked at him for a second.
- "I'm messing with you, Batsy. I always wanted to dress as Leia. Surprisingly, I never had. Padme once, it was a mess, but never Leia. Who are you planning to be?"
- "Maybe Luke... or Obi-Wan. Morgan suggested C3PO once."
- "If I'm Leia, you should be Han,"- I don't know why I said that out loud. I thought about it, I pictured it in my head, but I knew I shouldn't have said it. Then why did those words leave my mouth? I don't know.
- "Han Solo... yes... yeah, sure. Of course! We can pick our outfits this weekend."
- "Great! What do you think would look better? Slave Leia or classic all in white Leia?"- Spencer didn't answer. He just sipped his coffee and looked outside the window.
- "You would look good in both,"- his cellphone interrupted our conversations, and I thought it might be a case. But I was so wrong, it hurt.
- "Hello? Oh, hi, Ashley,"- I nearly hit the break as soon as I heard him saying her name, but instead, I turned around and looked at him.
- "Good, yes. On my way to work with (Y/N). Oh, that's good."
I didn't care what she was saying. I just needed to know why that bitch was calling him. I was blind in jealousy, and I was having a hard time hiding it.
- "Really? Emily? That's... that's great. Sure, we'll see you around, gotta go. Bye."
- "What the fuck?"- I swear, I didn't think what I was saying. Those words just slip through my lips straight from my guts. I hated Seaver.
- "That was Ashley."
- "Figured when you said "Hi Ashley." What? Are you best friends with her now?"
- "What? No! No way! She just wanted to say hi... and... She.... asked for my number 'cos she wanted to help her with some of the academy's projects,"- Spencer was so nervous he actually stuttered as he answered my simple question.
- "Of course, she did,"- my voice was bitter and hurt, but most of all, ironic. And I don't know if Spencer didn't want to understand me or actually didn't get the hint, but he just continued talking.
- "She wanted to tell me she requested her remedial training be at the BAU."
- "What?!"- that wasn't subtle. I actually yelled- "I'm gonna have to see her again?"
- "If Hotch approves..."
- "Fuck!! That's awful!!"- I hit the wheel, frustrated.
- "She's not a bad person, (Y/N). Her dad was a murderer, but that doesn't mean..."- I turned to look at Spencer for a second, and he just shut up- "Sorry."
- "I don't like her, Spencer."
- "Yes, I know."
- "Her dad killed my aunt!!"
- "I know..."
- "And on top of that, that bitch is..."
I had to bite my lips and focus on the road, actually holding my breath for a few seconds, just not to open my mouth and ruin it all.
The main reason why I hated Ashley Seaver wasn't just because of what her father had done. That itself was enough to keep her away. But on top of that, she was flirting with Spencer. She wasn't even subtle about it; she was nearly all over him. I saw her! She wanted him, and he had no idea! He was blind to her attention. Unless he liked it. Did he? Shit, I hoped not.
- "She what?"- Spencer whispered, scared of my reaction.
- "She plays the pity card the whole time. Bad things happen to all of us. You don't have to make it who you are, she does, and she expects sympathy."
I grabbed my muffin and took a big bite of it. Spencer sighed and stayed quiet for a moment, giving me space to decompress, I think.
- "Did you know the origins of carrot cake are disputed by many countries?"- I looked at Spencer, and he nodded- "Many food historians believe carrot cake originated from the English recipe of carrot puddings, eaten by Europeans in the Middle Ages when sugar and sweeteners were expensive, and many people used carrots as a substitute for sugar."
- "My mom would fight all those historians and convince them she invented it. Her carrot cake is the best."
- "And I would agree, the cake she baked for your last birthday was amazing."- I nodded and heard him chuckle as I kept my eyes on the road. I wanted to focus on the memories of my last birthday and how fun it was, but something was bugging me.
- "And why did she call you to tell you what she wanted to do?"- I parked the car outside the BAU and turned to Spencer. He opened his mouth, but no word came from it. So I asked him again.
- "Honey, why did Seaver call you to announce she would take the remedial training at the BAU?"
- "It... might... had been my idea,"- he whispered and held his satchel tight against his body. I didn't know what to say. I couldn't believe it.
- "Why on earth did you do that, Spencer?!"- I shouted as I got out of the car, grabbed my purse, my clean go bag in case we had a case, and started walking towards the building.
- "It wasn't like a suggestion. She just..."
- "I can't believe it!!"
- "It doesn't have to be that bad! It's just for a few weeks..."
- "Hopefully, Hotch won't accept."
- "(Y/N), come on,"- Spencer held my hand and stopped me- "This is not like you. Yeah, you don't like her, but you are making it a big deal, and it's not."
- "I'm starting to think you are crushed on her,"- I didn't want to say those words. They just slipped.
- "What!? Why? No!! I'm not!"- the high pitch on Spencer's voice was a clear sign of how uncomfortable he was with the conversation.
- "Then why are you defending her?"
- "I am not! I'm just saying maybe you are acting a little bit... irrational about this whole thing. She hasn't done anything bad."
- "Other than jeopardizing the whole case yesterday?"
- "Right, other than that..."
I felt Spencer's hand in mine, and I swear, I couldn't stop thinking about how it felt. It kept sending shivers all over my body. His thumb rubbed small circles on my skin, probably trying to calm me down, and it worked. I followed it with my eyes for a second as I took a few deep breaths and nodded.
- "Ok, I won't make a big deal if she stays."
- "Thank you."
- "Just... don't ask me to be her friend."
- "You don't have to be her friend."
Spencer stood in front of me and smiled. I swear all I could think of was kissing him. And a part of me felt it was getting harder and harder to resist. He put on his sunglasses and kept his hand in mine for a moment until Penelope's voice took us from our little bubble.
- "Good morning, my wonder babies!! Ready to fight crime?"
I actually didn't know what I was getting into.
Hotch had taken the day off. We were around the one-year anniversary of Haley's death, and according to what Rossi explained to us, Jack wasn't feeling so good. It was said it would be just a day or two, but I had the feeling it might be a couple of weeks. Hotch would always put himself second, but he would do whatever it took to keep him safe when it came to his son.
Morgan had been asked to take a trip to Petersburg Federal Correctional Complex to do a risk assessment on a case, so Spencer, Prentiss, and I were in the bullpen. Garcia was in her office, and Rossi was in a meeting with Strauss. I'd say it was a very calm morning, catching up with all the pending paperwork we had. Spencer had just gotten me a cup of coffee when I heard Seaver's cheerful voice.
- "Hi guys!"- she walked in with a big smile and waved- "How are you?"
Spencer looked at me as we all said our hellos. I could almost read "Please, be nice" written all over his face, and for a moment, I was willing to do as told. I didn't want him to suspect why I was so annoyed by her after all.
- "I talked to Hotch"- Emily smiled at Seaver and moved a chair for her- He signed off your remedial training, and I'll be your training agent. I'll supervise your work. I already told Rossi too, so it's official.
Ashley jumped from her chair and hugged Emily. I rolled my eyes and stared at the file on my desk. I really wasn't ready to deal with her. I wasn't prepared to deal with someone trying to steal Spencer from me.
Ok, Spencer wasn't mine to keep, but we had been inseparable for four years, and I didn't want to lose that. I didn't want to lose him.
I had never been ready to deal with Spencer dating other girls. The few times girls had hit on him had been awful. Once, Morgan took him to a club when we were on a case, 'cos the unsub was picking his victims there, and he taught him how to pick up girls. The bartender ended up giving him her number 'cos my dorky best friend was charming. Derek still remembered that moment from time to time, quoting it as "The day he turned Spencer into a man."
I loved Derek, but fuck, I hated him sometimes.
- "Welcome to the team,"- Spencer waved at Seaver from his desk and turned to me, raising an eyebrow.
- "Yeah, welcome,"- I added and cut her a short smile.
- "I'm thrilled to join you guys for a few weeks. I always dreamt of being here. I'm ready for making it up after the last case."
- "Don't be so hard on yourself,"- Prentiss interrupted her and smiled friendly- "You remained calm under pressure, and the case was solved. That's all that matters."
I had to control myself not to snort after Emily's words. Instead, I kept my eyes locked on my desk like I had done before. I was so focused on it that I could have actually developed telekinesis skills and moved the freaking file with my eyes.
- "I just wanted to say thank you to all of you,"- Seaver's voice was soft, in a mix of fear, excitement, and... something else I couldn't read.
- "Especially you, Spencer. I really enjoyed our talk last night, and I have the feeling I wouldn't be here if it weren't for you. Thank you for the pizza. I owe you dinner."
- "Don't, it was nothing,"- Spencer flustered and stood up quickly, grabbing his pile of files and walking away, arguing he needed to ask Garcia something.
I did my best not to move a muscle. I didn't want Seaver to know how much I hated the fact she had shared what seemed to be a lovely evening with Spencer. One he didn't actually mention when we talked about what we had done the previous evening. Why did he decide to keep me in the dark? I couldn't understand that. Maybe he just didn't want me to know he actually had feelings for Seaver. Maybe he had asked her out, and because he knew I hated her (though he really didn't know why), he decided not to tell me what was going on.
I had been wasting all that time in love with Spencer. I knew I would never act on those feelings, and clearly, he didn't have feelings for me. So... maybe it was time to let him go.
How could I let Spencer Reid go when I never actually had him?
DIWK Taglist:
@all-tings-diego @big-galaxy-chaos @muffin-cup @shilohpug @eternalharry @tvandfanfic @fandomtrash2405
Spencer taglist
@calm-and-doctor
General Taglist
@spenxerslut @ash19871962 @babebenhardy @meowiemari @archer561
Do you want to be on the taglist or ramble about this chapter with me? Just send me a message here.
Next update: June 16th, 2021
148 notes · View notes
jjungkookislife · 3 years
Text
Fic Recs 2020 Pt. 1
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Seokjin
let’s get married [SMAU] @hangsangwithbts
Summary: seokjin has no intention of getting married, but after facing tremendous pressure from his family to finally settle down, he comes up with the brilliant idea to fake a marriage. the lucky bride just so happens to be you.
voice mail @joonary
summary: kim seokjin is best known around campus for his romance advisory podcast, voice mail, but to you, he’s just your lovable idiot of a best friend. but when he accidentally lets it slip that he’s fallen for one of your fellow peers, you can’t help but be a little bit curious (and quite frankly, a tad bit jealous).
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Yoongi
cheers if you agree @out-of-jams
summary: If it weren’t for the fact that he didn’t know who you were or even how to get into contact with you, Yoongi wouldn’t be posting all over Weverse for anyone to see. Not that he thought anyone would be smart enough to put the pieces of the puzzle together with how many people responded to his posts anyway.
snake kisses @peekaboongi
summary: You are grossly unprepared for the snake hybrid that enters your life. Yoongi is quiet and sneaks around you but eventually, even the cold reptile warms up to you.
under construction [SMAU] @luffles424
summary: In which y/n is just trying to figure out what to do with her life with the help from her (un)helpful friends
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Hoseok
going once, going twice, sold @bxebxee
summary: But the real reason anything at all started with Hoseok was something much simpler, and probably wholly unexpected - not that you ever planned on any of the other members of the MBA Society to find out.You leave your unlocked phone in his car before stumbling your way into your tiny, studio apartment. And he sees a twitter notification asking you for further discount on your panties.That is all it takes.
just practice @lamourche
summary: The second time you hook up with Jung Hoseok, he doesn’t remember the first time.  You’re surprised.  It was only a few weeks ago, and you were in a broom closet. That has to be different, right? (Well, not really, you’ll learn.)
game over @9uk
summary: your boyfriend has been gaming all day without paying much attention to you. that is until his friends on discord brings up the moaning noises in the background.
you’re my kryptonite @dovechim
summary: Superheroes are immortal, they are everything we are not. The Krypton are a race of superhumans sent down to Earth to protect humans, and they are the epitome of nobility and protection. You have always believed in their immortal, God-like powers, revered and admired them your entire life. Your wish for your very own superhero is granted when you meet Jung Hoseok, a Krypton with the most unique, powerful abilities you’ve ever seen.
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Namjoon
first, do no harm @yandere-society
summary: Dr. Kim is well known as the most skilled heart surgeon in the hospital, but when you notice his mortality statistics seem skewered, you discover all is not what it seems. Now, Dr. Kim is offering you a choice: will you join him? Or become yet another broken heart beneath his scalpel?
internet friends [SMAU] @bts-celestials​
summary: meeting through online, namjoon slowly starts to fall for the person who likes all the things he’s into. maybe having friends online is fun.
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Jimin
reset @dovechim
summary: We are made of the pieces of what we remember, and we hold in ourselves the hopes and fears of those who love us. As long as there are memories to call our own, there can be no true loss. But Park Jimin has no such privilege.
paparazzi (tw: flash banner) @chinkbihh​
summary: What if the roles were reversed and it was Jimin who was the fan and you who was the idol?  But what if he wasn’t just a casual fan, but an avid fan?  Maybe even a sasaeng…  
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Taehyung
the morning after @softlyjiminie
summary: one night, full of passion, whispered promises and heated kisses. one morning, full of regret and unwanted memories. is a night with your ex enough to send you running back into the arms of the devil?
fake love @mygsii
summary: an arranged marriage between you and taehyung leaves behind feelings of bitterness and hatred. will your heart be able to survive, especially when you’ve loved him all your life, or will it fall apart with this marriage?
cheap skate @gukslut
summary: Who doesn’t know Taehyung and his lady? Cutest couple in town, I’d say, and have been since they started dating in their college days. Oh, that was a while ago, though. And still, they’re happy as can be in that place they have together. Almost hate seeing one without the other, y’know, it’s like seeing just one testi- oh, right, I’m not supposed to talk like that. Anyhoo, I only say that because I saw Taehyung at a jewelry store the other day while I was buying my sweet Jiminie his presents. Maybe that boy’s finally gonna pop the question, but I do hope he’s got a good plan for it. Something sweet and romantic. Maybe I’ll find out after Jiminie gets back from that cabin he’s visiting.
baby i @jiminsfault
summary: a one night stand with a stranger leads to so much more than just great sex
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Jungkook
only for love [SMAU] @lysjeon
summary: for almost four years it had been just him and sarang, and he had no plans on changing the life they had become accustomed to any time soon, but of course y/n has to come and shake his world.
one time in your room @ubemango
summary: There are papers to write, and virgins to daydream about. (You can think about Jeongguk’s dick later.)
piss off your parents @littlemisskookie
summary: In an effort to piss off your parents you move in with their worst nightmare- a boy with tattoos, a rock band, and an irresistible charm.
departure @nomnomsik
summary: As a flight attendant for Korean Air, you’re scheduled for a thirteen-hour flight to Japan. However, things get intimate between you and your partner and co-pilot, Jeon Jungkook, when he realizes Park Jimin, the famous idol from Korea, broads the plane and blatantly flirts with you.
curiosity @hobidreams
summary: when innocent jungkook comes to you with a not-so-innocent question… you decide it’s easier to just demonstrate.
inkling @gguksgalaxy
summary: Jungkook is your brother’s boyfriend’s co-worker, they own a tattoo and piercing parlour. In other words, he’s tall, gorgeous, has his passion literally etched into his skin, looks incredibly good in a man-bun, and is semi-unattainable for you. Why? Well…you’re not entirely sure but him ditching right after a very heated make-out session sure isn’t a good sign. His extremely poor mood the next week sure isn’t either, but the only way to fix it is to face the beast head-on. Right?
j’aime @baepop
summary: You’re the newest hire at a local café and head barista Jeon Jungkook takes you under his wing.
pop goes the cherry @1oserjk
summary: jungkook comes back home to find you visiting as well, all grown up — in more ways than one.
skirt chasers @1kook
summary: “Baggy clothes are in, but you wouldn’t know that, Miss I Draw Inspiration From Catholic School Girls.”
kiss it better @jincherie
summary: When one goes to Kim Seokjin for advice, it’s almost guaranteed to never end well. This is something Jungkook learns quickly when he mistakenly follows treasured advice to ‘be smart’ and ‘use his assets’. He just did what he was told! Of course, the execution was a bit poor… and embarrassing. But hey, if rocking up to cheer practice in a skirt doesn’t woo your crush, what will?
pay by play @yoonia
camboy!au
deeply poisoned @xmagicxshopx
summary: Kiss me on the lips, a secret just between the two of us. Deeply poisoned by the jail of you. I cannot worship anyone but you and I knew the grail was poisoned but I drank it anyway.
speeding ticket @minstrophywife
summary: Caught speeding to get home in time, you find yourself pulled over by a very delicious cop. Perhaps you can talk your way out of the ticket.Or,“I’m afraid I’m going to have to do a cavity search ma’am.”
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OT7/Multiple Members
buttercream @minniepetals
summary: you were always adorable in their eyes, sometimes a little too adorable.
dulce periculum @forgottenpasta
summary: Devious and devilish, your two new impish hybrids never miss a chance to torment you for your hopeless attraction to them, knowing exactly what they do to you. But is sly sexuality and enigmatic allure all there is to the tiger and wolf hybrid, or do the depths of their eyes hide something more for you? Part ½
tropicana @dragunjk
summary: groovy punch sippin
amaranthine @koyamuses
summary: As the sole owner of Nightshade, a quaint bed and breakfast on the outskirts of the city, you find pleasure in rising each morning to tend to your guests but behind closed doors and within the shadows, you are the covenant leader to a group of young vampires who have claimed you as their mate.More often than not, your day is brimming with a mix of daily chores and back door deals that ensure the survival of your covenant. However, everything changes when three werewolves come stumbling into your life, all three of them claiming it was your scent that drew them closer as the words true mate ring into the silence.
testosterone boys @kiwiscript
summary: A little end of the year party tradition gets taken too far.
operation love letters @ve1vetyoongi
summary: When every student on campus is going crazy about a survey that claims to make true love bloom, your best friend manages to convince you to join in on the fun — except you’re disappointed to find out that your results just seem to be lost causes. That is until a love letter from a mysterious secret admirer turns up and you find yourself on a mission to find the person behind the pen — but you quickly realise it’s going to be a lot harder than you initially thought when you have 7 possible bachelors to investigate, right? Operation: Love Letters a-go!
our princess @iridescentjin
summary: In your newly established poly relationship, you are intimate with both Taehyung and Seokjin at the same time for the first time.
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96 notes · View notes
visd3stele · 3 years
Text
magic and kids
summary:
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A/N: I really hope you like it. Thank you for your requests. Loved writing it.
art credit: @phantomrin
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TW: none
@britishbookworm2 requested (if you want to leave a request as well, click)
masterlist
°•▪︎~▪︎•°
It's been four years since Taryn decided the mortal world would be a more suitable place to raise her child than Elfhame. Even if her sister was now High Queen, the fairies would still make life hard for her and her baby. Maybe not on purpose, she admits it. But magic runs wild, free and unstoppable. Used to it, the Fae Folk barely notices the dangers. And frankly, they don't care. Not allowed to use it on humans as cruelly as before, some meaner courts claim innocent ignorance. How can an entire society of enchanted beings change overnight? How could they be expected to adjust to human fragility all of a sudden?
So Taryn took her baby, promised her sister to visit and fled to Heather and Vivi's. It wasn't as hard as she'd thought. Getting used to the mortal world, that's it. And if her baby had longer canine than normal, or his ears sharpened to pointy edges to the top, it passed unnoticed. Her son certainly didn't stood out the way Vivi did, even with light brown eyes that looked orange in the sun and rusty red hair. He didn't need much glamouring either, not like Oak, Oriana or Madoc. By the time she sent him to preschool his hair was long enough to cover the ears and no one seemed to notice the teeth even without magic.
For all the talk Taryn did on how she wanted her son to be free of his father in all ways, snapping at Oak when the boy tried to teach him magic before he knew how to properly walk and forbidding her family to bring Fairyland up, she named him Renard.
Fitting, though not what she should have done. Maybe part of her can't let Locke go, not entirely. She knew he didn't particularly wanted the baby, that everything he promised her were pretty lies. But for a few months, it has been real. Their marriage, their love, their lives. She saw her dreams come true, one after another: the mistress of an important household, throwing parties for courtiers, motherhood.
Now that everything she wanted snaped broken in tiny little pieces carried away by harsh winter wind, Taryn Duarte couldn't phantom having her child become like his father.
"It has nothing to do with magic, for fuck's sake!" Vivi exploded once, after Taryn better than not threw Oak and Oriana - who came to visit - out of the apartment for trying to reach Renard's magic. "He won't become a sly, selfish fox if he can change appearance or grow horses out of leaves. It's all about his up-bringing!"
"I want him to be normal, Vivi! That's why I took him here!"
Renard has been barely one year old when the argument happened. But it was enough to take his mother's words to heart.
°•▪︎~▪︎•°
Four years old Renard and twelve years old Oak played outside, jumping in crusty piles of autumn leaves. The princeling hadn't given up his plans to teach his cousin magic. He refused to let go of such opportunity: a friend he didn't have to hide of, one he could play with like he used to in Elfhame.
"Hey, Ren-Ren," Oak said, "check this out!" The older boy held up his hand, brows furrowed in concentration, lip grazed between his teeth. Nothing happened for an alarming amount of time. And then... the leaves twirl around the two cousins, splashing then with guts of wind and scarce dew as it swept them up in a friendly tornado.
Renard chuckled in delight, stretching to catch some of the closer leaves. But as soon as he touched one, the whole thing fell apart. "No!" Do it again, Oak. Do it again."
"I'm sorry, Ren-Ren," Oak faked a yawned and laid on the ground. "Magic is very serious business. Very consuming. I'm too tired to even move." He let his eyes close dramatically, watching Renard between his lashes. Truth be told, every time he did magic Oak felt good. Vibrant. As if the earth itself reached out and gave him life. But Renard didn't need to know that yet. He can definitely learn it by himself if Oak's plan works out.
The younger boy pouted and dropped on the ground. "Not fair," he muttered to himself.
"You know, Ren-Ren, you're half fae. That means there's a pretty good chance you're magic too."
"No, I'm not."
"You can't know that. Come on, give it a try!"
"No, Oak! I'm not magic. I'm not like Father, I'm like Mom. Like Mom, just like that."
Oak straightened himself, but didn't rose from the ground. "Ok, Ren-Ren. Listen up. Magic is not bad. It's fun. Don't you think it's fun?"
"Yes!" Renard nodded enthusiastically. "It's super fun. When you do it, Oak." At that the named boy own enthusiasm faded away in an instant.
"Thank you, Ren-Ren," he deadpanned. "But do you know what's more fun than watching me practice magic?" Not giving the kid a chance to answer, to even take in the question, really, Oak said "To do it yourself."
"Do you really think I should try, Oak?" Clearly, the little boy was attracted to magic. And clearly something was stopping him. But his older cousin slowly made whatever that was seem less big and scary, dragging him along in his qualms.
"Totally!"
Renard pushed his lips forward with his tongue, sticking it out through the gap in his teeth. Caramel eyes shone with desire, his red hair flown around by a cold, pleasant wind. "Ok," he gave in, as expected. "How do I do it?"
The smirk that lightened up Oak's face can only be describes as evil. Though no ill intention hid behind it. Only the knowledge his plan worked out, just like his sister, Jude's.
"Listen to me very carefully, alright? There is not just one way to make magic, Ren-Ren. You have to find your own. But for now, try the basics. Think really hard on what you want to happen. Something easy. Got anything in mind?" Renard frowned, then his eyes landed on a tree which still had some green leaves on its branches and nodded.
"Perfect! Now, imagine whatever you want to happen. Imagine it happening. Are you imagining?"
"Yes."
"No!" Oak groaned. "If you're paying attention to me, then it means you're not focusing on magic."
"But how will I know what to do if I don't listen to you?"
"I told you! Magic is your own, Ren-Ren. It comes naturally. So, dig it up. Use your imagination."
Renard tried to shut out the world around him, picturing the sole tree in his mind. A warm pull tugged at him and he followed. His magic, he tried not to dwell on the joy, but instead focusing on his practice. His magic reaching out. Because he reached out first.
The boy allowed the warmth to take control, guiding him through it. The tree now carved in his mind by detail wasn't enough. He needed action. But just imagining the leaves to fall wouldn't do. Renard couldn't say how exactly he knew it. He just did. Something more tender was needed. The half fae kid had to imply what he wants and trust his magic to follow his lead.
So Renard made himself cold. Chilly. Feeling a breeze of wind creeping inside his clothes, whipping his skin gently. Enough to rip a leaf off a tree, though. Which it did. The wind he summoned couldn't be felt, not really. Only by himself and the green leaves that departed one by one from their branch as if plucked by an invisible hand.
Oak gasped. Then grinned. And then he laughed. Renard broke free of his concentration, pleased to see his magic didn't falter. Not until every and each green leaf from his chosen tree didn't fall. The sight made him still in awe for a couple of seconds. But soon enough he joined his cousin with a bubble laugh, jumping up and down and running to tackle Oak in a tight hug.
"I did it, Oak! I did it!"
"Yes, you did, Rem-Ren. Indeed, you did. Congrats!"
"Can we show auntie Vivi? And auntie Oriana?"
When Madoc and Oriana first came in the mortal world, Taryn wanted nothing to do with them. But years of being cared for by the blue skinned, white haired, pink eyes woman showed their tale. She agreed to see her, but only her. She could be part of her child life, if she wanted.
"Sure. But don't you want to show your mom first?"
"Mom and auntie Heather work a lot. We can show them later." Renard said, but he felt his magic shrinking at the thought of his mother. His Mom didn't like his father. And his magic comes from his father. Is that why his magic doesn't want to reveal itself near Taryn? He hoped it was just him overthinking it, because he loves his Mom and wants to share this with her.
°•▪︎~▪︎•°
Oak stayed with auntie Oriana, who was his mother, so Renard couldn't bring himself to be upset over it. He would want to be with his mother as much as he can as well. So he did a little trick for auntie Vivi, who told him to stay where he was, brought a camera and ordered him to glamour the tea cups again. Renard made them look like pumpkins, since the Halloween being over the corner made him impossibly anxious - in a good way.
Turns out even mortal technology can be fooled by fae's magic. Vivi showed the clip to Heather, who coed over him until Taryn came home.
"Hello, treasure. How was your day? Wanna give mommy a kiss?"
Renard jumped into his mother's arms, pressing a strong kiss on her cheek before starting to tell her about all the fun he had with cousin Oak. "And then he said I should try magic too."
Tamryn stilled. "And?"
"Look, Mom!"
Renard broke a vase, then, with a twitch of his fingers put it back together. "Auntie Vivi says I'm a natural."
"Does she? That's amazing, sweetheart."
But his mother didn't sound thrilled. In fact, her smile wasn't even a smile at all, but a thin line. "I'm sorry, mommy. I knew I shouldn't've done it, but I didn't know why. Now I know: you don't want me using my magic. It'll make me bad, like father."
Renard pushed his lips up front, scrunched his nose up, wiggled his toes, all in an atempt to stop the tears hurting his eyes from falling. When he realized it was in vain, he took off running to his room.
When Taryn entered minutes later she found her son curled on his left side in the middle of the bed, hugging a black goat plushie his uncle Cardan gave him on his birthday tight to his chest. She hated herself for causing the pain struck look on her son's face.
"Hey, sweetie."
"Hi, Mom." Renard wiped his nose with his jumper's sleeve.
"I'm so sorry, sweetie. Mommy was just scared, but that's not your fault. You could never be bad. Magic is not bad. Of course you can practice all you want, but we'll settle some ground, basic rules first. Ok?"
"Really?"
"Rules you can never, ever break. Really."
"Thank you, Mommy! You're the best! Just wait until Oak hears about it."
A/N: Renard means fox in french. Also: oops, guess I finished it earlier than expected and didn't really felt like waiting days to post it 😅
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cadykeus-clay · 4 years
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i would low key love to hear your tangent about the differences there are between how VM and TM9 react with the world
ah, the perfect excuse for me to put off my 30 page reading, thank you :3
(i’m also going to preface this by saying most of this is stuff i’ve picked from other people’s various metas and i absolutely do not remember who those authors might be so i apologize jsdlkfsd)
....
but uh ... basically i feel like vox machina and the nein have a completely opposite standard for how they interact with the people the consider to be their “inner circle” vs. everyone who doesn’t qualify as that. 
vm is a group of individuals who, overall, had one cruel person that slighted them but didn’t really destroy their faith in humanity. (their faith in themselves is a whole different horse. that ones .... woof. looking at you percy scanlan tary keyleth.) Percy had the briarwoods, Grog had Kevdak, the twins and tary had their father. so, the way that they interact with just random people that they meet is - with exceptions of course - amicable, or at the very least, respectably polite. 
they’re the saviours of emon, the freers of whitestone. they have festivals held in their honor. they have kid fans and random farmers knocking on their doorstep for aid because they’ve heard tales of the kindness. sure, vex can be a hassle when she’s haggling down a price, and keyleth tends to poke buttons in way that gets her arrested a fair amount of the time, but at the end of the day they’re the people’s heroes, and they’re happy to be that!
their inner circle, however, is much more closely guarded. they have a few chosen allies (gilmore, allura, kima, kash and zahra, cassandra) and that’s it. They’re hesitant with anyone else trying to creep into their personal fold. Hell, it took beating up tary and him breaking down sobbing for them to even consider liking him. they’ve been burned by raishan and clarota and hotis, by individuals they let in and who then stabbed them in the back. they’ll do almost any favor for a stranger who asks, but they’ll be damned if they trust anyone to actually join their midst. vox machina is vox machina is vox machina and that’s incredibly hard to change. 
the nein, on the other hand, are fundamentally a group of rejects. some of them have specific people they can point a finger at and say “i hate you”, but those problems stem from a greater societal rejection. beau has daddy issues, but she also felt rejected by the entire cobalt soul until dairon found her. caleb has trent’s fucked up shit, but he also has this constant pressure of having failed his entire country, not to mention the faceless hate piled up on him from living homeless for a year. jester’s whole deal is that she had to hide from LITERALLY ALL OF SOCIETY for her entire childhood because she wasn’t supposed to exist.
and so, the nein are shitheads to society right back. they’re mean to random barkeeps, they trash their inns and don’t say sorry, they mock most NPCs behind their back (or sometimes right to their face. @ marius).  Every favor asked of them comes with a ton of deliberation and arguing about whether its bait or not (ie bowlgate, the giants in the mine outside rosohna, essiks “favors”). 
but, on the flip side, they’re willing to tug just about anyone into their ranks. if society already hates them by default, what’s there to lose if they get close to someone? nothing, there’s only more love to be found! so it’s adopting random bird girls on the road, its sending cupcakes to a hag that cursed your friend, its sending messages to everyone you’ve ever met just to check in, it’s making someone sit in the hot tub with you and share trauma and then when you find out he started a war you say “we get it bro” and kiss him on the forehead. it’s “welcome to the mighty nein”. 
and it’s also very interesting, i think, to talk about the ways in which the party interacts with themselves. vox machina was a family, undoubtedly, as is the nein now. but vox machina ... had a lack of desperation to their attachment. i mean for one, they took a full year off from adventuring together and scattered cross continent. even if the nein gets down time like they did, i expect they’ll just trail each other around like lemmings. (its kind of what they’ve been doing from hiatus until now with the eiselcross arc starting). 
but vox machina just ... went. and scanlan walked away from the party and (after the heat of the moment), they agreed to just let him be. and pike would spend weeks on quests for sarenrae without much of a complaint. even at the end - and this will be a controversial take, i know - but they let vax go pretty easily. (sure, mechanically they were wiped from fighting, but besides tears the only attempt to defy trq was from percy, which even he gave up on with minimal struggle because vax said to stop it). that’s not to say they don’t miss each other when they’re gone! of course they do!!! but they trust each other to go off into the world, because the world as whole is a place they trust. 
(the one exception to this might be vex, who fought every one of these situations adamantly, but that’s a whole separate essay about her issues stemming from an innate sense of ‘failed family’ that she’s desperate to not repeat, and less about a mistrust of everyone until proven otherwise)
the nein on the other hand. hoo boy. they’ve been hot glued to each other’s hips since day one. So many quotes (many from beau, which could be worked into my previous vex essay, as they’re very much cross-campaign foils. getting sidetracked again) are about their inability to separate. “You don’t get to choose who cares about you”; “No one goes”; “If one of us is gone for more than 7 days assume we’re dead and have a funeral”; “Do we have co-dependecy issues?” Jester’s cool personal vacation to her god’s get together turned into a party with everyone because why would she go anywhere without the nein? Veth’s time with Luc and/or Yeza is constantly overrun with the rest of the nein dropping in for fun. Even small things like shopping trips are so much more “oh well if you’re going then i’ll go” snowballs than they ever were with vm. 
Also, ashley’s absences had to be much more forceful than in c1. Post episode 11, the only time yasha left the group (rather than someone else piloting her) of her own free will was when she ran in grief from molly’s grave. And yes, there’s something to be said about “oh they were on a boat for a long time she had nowhere to go” but if Matt can justify astral projection pike, i feel like he could justify ‘the stormlord teleports yasha away for a bit’ and he chose not to. 
Because!!!!!!!!! of the dynamic that the nein has!!!!!!!! Because of this idea that the world is bad and cold and full of hate and in here in our little hut (soon to be mansion??????) it’s safe and good and full of love and no one can leave because then you’d be going somewhere much more dangerous and we can’t have that, now can we? 
.....
well uh. that’s a lot of words. i hope they made some sense??? and were at all what you were expecting???? thank u for sending the ask tho this was very fun to write!!
tldr: vox machina is a group of people who were betrayed by one bad figure, so they trust the world and are wary of the individual; whereas the nein is a group of people who were failed by the world at large so they welcome the loner and fear the pack. 
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