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thatrandomblogsays · 4 months

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Annabeth: I, a child, had to earn Thalia’s love, that’s how the world works! I have to earn my moms love. Love is transactional, you gotta be worthy of it first silly :)

Percy, listening to this on the train

#STOP TRAUMATIZING THIS CHILD PLEASE #this is what it’s like when you were raised in a loving home and you find out your friend wasn’t #but they don’t know they weren’t #so you’re like um hey that’s fucked up and sometimes a crime?#you tell them parents are supposed to love you as is without earning it and they don’t believe you #you can hear the therapy bill racking up #annabeth chase #Percy jackson #percy jackson and the olympians #percy jackon and the olympians #pjo #pjo series #pjo tv show #mine #adding on to my tags because some people are debating if that’s how love works #love is meant to be a mutual exchange and something that grows over time between two people as their bond grows #whereas how Annabeth says it #in my opinion at least #she had to do XY and Z to be worthy of thalias love before receiving it #like with her mother #she has to be amazing before Athena is proud of her #vs Athena being proud of her just for being her daughter #that being said I’m not hating on a traumatized child having potentially negative and toxic patterns #more pointing out the comedy of the scene from Percy’s perspective who has a good grasp on healthy vs unhealthy relationships

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andthebeanstalk · 11 months

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Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need.#the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist.#the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28!#a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents.#they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong.#and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives.#you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead?#or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of.#no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow.#i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong.#just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

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proxycrit · 3 months

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(I point. Gently, in the voice of somebody who’s mind touched by the outer gods, i whisper truth in your ears:

Your honor the horses are now lesbians

(Anyways here’s the designs)

#mlp #based off my mlp redesigns (no i will not be taking criticism)#mlp redesign #fluttershy is now a giant jacked carnivorous shire horse with anxiety #rarity is a trans queen and she’s carrying the plot on her back #applejack’s been bequeethed the oldest child syndrome after the traumatic death of her parents and learned to do taxes at the tender age of #13?? how do horses age #and rainbow dash is both loved and reviled by her pegasi foundry because she has ‘too much gryphon in her’#(but she FAST AS FUC BOI.)#anyways pinky’s my favorite. we don’t know whats up with pinky but she smiles a lot and the world distorts around her at exactly 1014 am.#twilight is celestia’s favored pupil prophet and is trying her best to figure out what the hell is up with pinkie and failing spectacularly #twilight also hatched a dragon from an inert stone and people have opinions about that #mostly ‘what are you feeding her’#(holds rarity and applejack) i think they’re neat together #they bond over growing up too quickly and have a vi-caitlynn thing goin on #(squints) didnt draw the cute mark crusaders but they’d be like. the batmen of the town. and it was fun and games until twilight heard #and gave them ACTUAL weapons #rarity #applejack #rainbow dash #twilight sparkle #fluttershy #pinkie pie #spike the dragon #I FORGOT SPIKE #spike’s a stone dragon that hatched from a stone egg. he is not meant to exist. he’s an elderitch horror and a baby boy and we love #and cherish his adorable little face #art #critdraws #Rest your Weary Hooves in our New Found Home

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bluerosefox · 6 months

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Of Tiny Tots, Mistaken Identities, and Reunions

Seventeen year old Damian Wayne is dragged to a business deal outside of Gotham (along with his father and Drake), mostly to keep up appearances that the family does work outside of Gotham, networking, and because Damian does need to learn the ropes of the company, he decides to head outside the meeting with the Manson family to get a breather (mainly cause the Manson's were annoying him fully, it was like they were trying to suck up towards Damian and trying to push their daughter on him but at the same time he caught them almost insulting and hostile towards him before they would stop and correct themselves) when out of the blue a three year old toddler with black hair comes running over with a cheerful "Daddy!" and latches onto his leg.

Damian is stunned in place but feels frozen when he hears a voice, older and almost identical to his own but he can detect a familiarity in it, a voice he only hears in his dreams nowadays say.

"Ellie, no! That's not me Starlight! I'm so sorry dude-"

When Damian turned his head towards the voice he's meet with an near identical face, granted there were some minor differences, but very, very familiar pair of striking blue eyes staring at him. Eyes that were somehow full of life, which shouldn't be possible because the last time he saw those eyes they had been dim and milked over years ago. The speaker had become startled at the his sudden turn and the words that he had been saying had quickly died out when he too took in Damian's features.

"D...Damian?..." the name came out so soft and small that Damian almost didn't hear it but he did.

And before Damian could stop himself, he spoke a name he hadn't dared utter in years.

"Danyal."

His twin looked like he had just seen a ghost, and Damian was sure he looked the same. And given the last time they had last saw each other it was no wonder they both looked like death warmed over them for a moment.

After all... Damian had failed to protect his brother, Danyal al Ghul all those years ago on a botched mission.

His bother who... wasn't dead.

His brother who was looking like he wanted to run but was keeping himself rooted in his spot.

His brother whose eyes were glancing downwards and seemed so nervous.

His brother who knew the little girl, Ellie, still hugging his legs.

His brother who had... responded and corrected her mix up when she had called Damian 'Daddy.'

And oh, she's looking up at him and making grabby hands wanting to be picked up and she has Danyal's eyes and his nose and-

Oh... Damian.... Damian's an uncle it seems.

#danny phantom #danny fenton #dp x dc #blue rambles #crossover #writing ideas #danny phantom dc #dpxdc #dcxdp #danielle phantom #damian and danny are twins #BUT with a tiny twist #Danielle got destabilized and the only way to save her was to deage her and let her grow up naturally #Danny steps up to be her dad #its rough but he's got his friends and family to help out #Ellie is a tiny gremlin toddler that loves wandering off #her having ghost powers does not help #Danny was dropping by Sam's to give her some stuff before heading home #he didn't know there was a meeting taking place #nor that it was the Wayne's in the building #Danny died on a botched mission and was brought back by the pits but a portal whisked him away as he woke up in the waters #it spat him out on the road outside Amity and he wandered into town with his mind hazy and confused #He's later found by the Fenton's whose equipment detected the portal opening but only found Danny.#good Fenton parents? I wanna say good Fenton's in this one.#Anyways they take him in. Like a feral wet cat lol.#Danny knows going back to the League is a death sentience since he failed and felt like a failure and was holding his brother back #so he stayed away... and grew to love his life outside the League #He isn't ready to see Damian after all this time though. Not at all. But neither is Damian so its even.

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riding-with-the-wild-hunt · 5 months

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Olive harvest in the West Bank. Photos by Ari Messinis, courtesy of Al Jazeera.

#the linked article is on settler violence in the west bank - they have words from some people in these pictures so. worth checking out.#palestine #west bank #brought to you by me #lovely humans #love is stored in the olive grove and love is resistance and the olive trees will grow forever i think

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crowleylesbian · 8 months

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“crowleys gonna reject aziraphale in s3🥺‼️” crowley would walk on his hands and knees 1000 miles through a desert of broken glass for just the chance to hang out with aziraphale. be serious.

#me on twitter; wow this is some hot garbage… but i can’t stop scrolling #and now that people have found this post: believe me when i say that i sam crowleylesbian do understand all too well that it feels unfair to #crowley. i just think it’s unrealistic to paint him as the ‘scorched earth’ breakup archetype #when he’s clearly the divorcee who will never truly move on and maybe grows his hair out a little [for the love of god please this part<-]

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eatingsomegreeneggos · 6 months

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