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#good night good night where ever you are
quickhacked · 3 months
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Mikhail and Vitali were inseparable; when they weren’t studying or getting into fights, they would hang out at Mikhail’s place to smoke and get drunk on cheap rum and vodka, to then pass out in each other’s arms and sleep most of the next day away. They promised each other— no matter what would happen— they would never leave each other’s side. Yet after starting university and college respectively, they did not see each other for a little over six years, leaving them both heartbroken and wondering what went wrong.
by lucas expedidor // catch me if you can; eden // clementine von radics, from 'courtney love prays to oregon' // sam sax, cruising: a broken tiara // 'ceramic home' by heavensghost; quote from john murillo // 'something's changed' by laiikastears // i don't want to watch the world end with someone else; clinton kane // fortesa latifi, from 'the truth about grief' // audre lorde, the evening news // frank o'hara, biotherm (for bill berkson) // heading home; ruben // 'preface to a dream' by alessandra casini // tokyo; caroline kole // langston hughes, poem // haruki murakami, norwegian wood // julie buntin, marlena // by lute // by aleksandr popov // anyway; noah kahan // christa wolf, cassandra: a novel and four essays
#cp2077#edit:mikhail#edit:vitali#nuclearocs#nuclearedits#happy birthday to my two boys :^) yes they share the same birthday what about it. it's essential to their whole. thing#whatever it is. they're like soulmates but also they are NOT dating. i need you to understand that. because it makes everything funnier#you guys remember when i first introduced them here and people thought they were together. good times honestly#but yeah no vitali is officially dating vincent and mikhail is just their eternal third wheel. their relationship can't be defined#they also reunite of course but i LOVE emphasizing their grief. they didn't know they'd ever see each other again#and they've known each other since around age 12. imagine spending almost every day with someone who CHOSE you#and then suddenly not seeing them or talking to them for YEARS. what do you do with that grief. that pain#sure they've found each other back but what do you do with that. where do you put it. it makes me insane!!!#they both were so lonely in their own way. vitali getting lost in vices and crowds but ending up all by himself at the end of the day#and mikhail drowning himself in studying and pushing himself far over his limits just to distract himself from the hole in his chest#night city in my head is much more massive than what it feels like in game. like yeah it feels big but not. BIG big#and i think mikhail and vitali's story and them losing contact while only a district apart really emphasizes how like#how HUGE this city is not only in terms of actual land it covers but also just. how overwhelming it is. how it can swallow you whole#anyway if you've read all of this hi. wanna make out
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caffeineecold · 1 year
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i feel like we don't talk about the youngblood chronicles enough. like. fall out boy releases folie, and then like ten months later they go on hiatus. and then. 2013. they come back with save rock and roll. but not only that they make a music video for EVERY SONG on the whole album, spending a majority of their budget on elton john and fake blood and it becomes a whole ass MOVIE that they release video by video until the whole thing is like 50 minutes long and it's just up on youtube. to watch. for free. and that was incredibly badass of them
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Front facing Wizard Celebi 💪
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Went through the teen plushie liker plight of being made fun of for an impulse buy two seconds after and hating this guy for a while because of that but I've come around because look at that face. Look at that cloak and leaf hat. I'd let them curse my bloodline
oh this is fucking adorable. i didn't know a Wizard Celebi aesthetic even existed, unless this is unofficial—the only thing i remember was the thing they did for halloween one time. i like this. this is good. here have some nose ratings about it:
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dunno about wimpod. i feel like they're just scared. typically this is not a very Good emotion to have. i think it's in the name. Wimp od
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forecast0ctopus · 2 months
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Just wanted to pop in and say that your art is so cool!! It's so-- SHAPES!! And I especially like how you draw McCoy, he's a favorite of mine and he has such a specific set of facial features that seems so hard to simplify, and yet you manage so well! And there's something I really love about your poses and compositions too, they're so very dynamic and/or evocative even when characters are just standing. Aaa so much to say--
I also saw your last ask, and as someone who was also intimidated by the sheer amount of content there is like you, just know that if you get invested you kinda just forget about it. I got into TNG first and that series alone looked like an enormous task to finish. Before I knew it I finished it and went on to watch DS9, and I already can't wait to see more. In general my tip is to go with the flow and see it as a hobby rather than something to achieve, because nobody is forcing you to watch EVERYTHING there is. You get there when you'll get there, y'know! It's a show about silly space people, have fun with it! (but with all the fan art you're drawing, I'm sure you already are hehe)
ANYWAY SORRY FOR THE BARRAGE OF TEXT THIS AIN'T EVEN AN ASK BUT UHHH BUH-BYE
THANKS i just. like shapes and points and lines.. i just think they’re neat…… i really like drawing mccoy hes got such a specific posture haha i will definitely be posting. more of him lmao
im on tng s2 right now and i definitely never push myself to watch things i don’t want to watch (except angel (1999) because. i like spike) but i do take my time with watching things so itll be a good while until i’m on the next series.. it did take me uhhh years to finally finish tos but the dam really broke on that in december so. here we are
bones time
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adammilligan · 2 years
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when adam says "no, john winchester was some guy who took me to a baseball game once a year. i don't have a dad" like yes SIR get his ass
#i have so many thoughts about adam and kate and their dynamic with john and it's mainly that#obviously anything about john said by the ghoul has to be taken with a whole handful of salt. obviously#because it was actively trying to manipulate sam and dean#but when the ghoul said that younger adam bugged kate 24/7 to call john i believe it. just because it makes sense#he was young! he wanted to know who his dad was. and that's understandable#and the fact that adam HAD to beg 24/7 for kate to call him....i think kate knew something was off about john#i really do. and the fact that john only showed up on adam's birthdays and only ever took him out to baseball games#which are very crowded very PUBLIC places where anything can be observed by bystanders#i think kate set that up as well. without adam's knowledge#but adam eventually grew disillusioned with john as well because from a kid's perspective#who's had to watch his mother work herself to death to support the both of them#john WAS a douchebag who only ever came around to try and fail to play house#he didn't bother trying to raise adam he didn't pay child support he didn't do ANYTHING#he just showed up pretended to act like a father and then left. and adam and kate were left there still#with their bills. with adam still having to raise himself. with kate still working the night shift and breaking her back to support them#it makes me think about how it affects adam in the future. like his behavior#because adam as we've seen has always tried to look at things from different perspectives and hear people out#in 5x18 he was like okay i'll hear you guys out even though i don't like you. give me one good reason#and in 15x08 he advocates for sam and dean even though he doesn't want to. he talks michael#but it's so interesting to me. because the line that's always gotten me about 15x08 is 'you still care about that? after he left you in the#cage?'#and it's like. adam IS genuinely trying to understand where michael's coming from. he DOES understand michael's love for his father#but when concerning the father it's like#he DOES tend to be black and white about it. john was a shitty person so therefore he's not his dad#god is a shitty person who left michael in the cage therefore michael shouldn't care what he thinks. or about him in general#et cetera et cetera#the issue of the father is the one issue that adam is black and white about. and that is to say fuck them we don't need them#it's SOOOO interesting to me. really#kate rambles#adam milligan
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ribbononline · 7 months
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New fic by @silverjirachi out wahoo wahoo! Go support it!!
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tiredela · 2 months
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not me digging up an old sketch of my vestige to practice faces lol
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tomfrogisblue · 4 months
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I have finally finished O Segredo Na Floresta.
I have cried more than I thought possible.
And I fear I shall never be the same.
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spectacular-supernova · 2 months
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HAPPY BIRTHDAY, PRESIDENT OF TONARI CLUB!
I, uh, m-made something f-for you.
Know that I'm totally embarrassing my ass over here, so... Don't laugh loud enough that I can hear you from over here!
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Aaaaaand now, per Lyndis tradition, I'm gonna overexplain shits and turn a simple Ask into a whole ass Ramble!
-----------------------------(why is there no "Read More" partition in an Ask? I'm so embarrassed right now goddamn it)-------------------------
If you're short-sighted, try removing your glasses or contact lenses and look at this picture. I just did and it's suddenly even prettier!
I actually planned to draw your Sonicsona at first. And then I realized I deadass couldn't even draw Base Sonic. Then I thought I should draw a mole. I realized I also couldn't draw a mole. I thought I should just go for the easiest shit and draw ToFu. I realized I could not draw either one of them, too.
Because I cannot draw, I cheat! I mean I turn things into shapes (chiefly triangles, though not all of them) and then color them and hope that something shows up. This is me using this scientific /+ philosophical concept called Emergence.
No, I didn't just say THAT to sound like I have a technique of any kind, trust. It's so totally a technique—my very productive ass told me.
I remember you saying your favorite color is something like pink, blue, and stuff? It was from that tag game from last year. Hence, I decided I should create a context so I could draw an obscene amount of pink and blue.
If I'm being honest, it took me less than a millisecond to come up with the exact context—Breath of the Wild/Tears of the Kingdom is abundantly blue.
And since I always wanted to sneak ToFu in, I thought I would make a purplish-pink dusk. And then I will sneak those stargazing two in.
Come on. Everyone knows those ToFu panels. Even someone like me, who had not seen that part of the manga yet, knows.
Bless Tonari for being so relaxing to color.
HOWEVER! Fushi's limited-ass color presented a big problem for my cheat-drawing. How many combinations of "white" can you even make before you zoom out and see... nothing?! So I basically sabotaged them. That's what you get for being difficult, you mopey, neck-crick-possessing, fragile-enough-to-be-blown-by-the-wind cutie doofus.
I made up the color of their pants. I didn't even refer to their Nameless Boy drip when I decided on the color. I assed that part.
Yes. I admit I put a shit ton of effort into coloring Zelda. This version of Zelda is my kin, you know. Anyway, I like the way her, uh, shirt turned out.
I also like how the Master Sword turned out, but there was so much blue I ended up requiring outlines to distinguish it from Link's shirt and the sky. Told ya I have no technique or skill. I cheat through and through
I was too lazy to draw those sky islands. Besides, the ToTK side is already saturated with details.
What the fuck issa "proportion?" Everyone's head is an orange. The difference, Nova, is whether it's a Mandarin Orange or an Orange.
I don't know if I overdid Dinraal's draconic mane. It looks like she's wearing a wig. At least she is different from how she initially looked—a red tapeworm outfitted with chicken legs.
I admit I put more effort than any Past Me would have into Dinraal because a certain mutual is very, ah, particular about dragons.
Drawing two of your favorite ships for their show of devotion was a completely deliberative choice on my end. Did you also realize that both Link and Fushi had a short, small, low ponytail and that both Zelda and Tonari had similar hair? I believe it's due to me hitting my drawing skill limitation.
There is actually an Easter Egg of some sort in this picture. It's not the ugly doodle thing, no. That thing is me. I'm not an Easter Egg; I'm a ghost.
I'm not telling you what that Easter Egg is. I'm fine with it never being discovered; it'd be like those secret levels in old video games.
But if you DID discover it, come tell me what you think it is!
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I hope you like it enough! Instead of it giving you a migraine, that is. Surely my """art"""... doesn't require a trigger warning... right?
Have a good one, mai bruzha!
---Lyn
A RAMBLE FROM YOU LYN IS THE BEST POSSIBLE BRITHDAY PRESENT I COULD HAVE EVER RECEIVED!!!! COUPLED WITH ART BY YOU????? AND OF MY FAVORITE FELLAS????? What did I deserve to be so blessed ;A; 💕💕💕
I’ll spare us all a little extra scrolling on my part by adding that read more you were fretting about, I have my own ramble upcoming!
I KNOW YOURE ON YOURSELF ABOUT NOT BEING ARTISTIC OR WHATEVER BUT THIS IS ART!!! AND DAMN GOOD ART TOO!!!!!!! This is!!!!!!!!!!! I want this made into stained glass I want to make this the permanent window to me bed roOM LYN THIS IS AMAZING THIS IS ALMOST CERTAINLY GOING DOWN AS ONE OF MY FAVORITE ART STYLES!!!! There’s no such thing as cheating in art, it’s all art!!! “Cheating” is a style, no technique is a style!!! I should know I have none either, hehe -w-‘ your art may be some type of cubism? Hehe idk I’m not an art student :3 Either way this is absolutely gorgeous I’m in LOVE!!!
It’s so creative and well done and I LOVE your eye for detail, the lighting is inspired!!!! Like the way the sun hits the space behind Zelda is so pretty, AND ZELDA IS SO PRETTY!!!!!! EVERYRHING IS SO PRETTY, I CANT FOCUS ON ONE THING BECAUSE I KEEP JUMPING BACK AND FORTH BETWEEN ALL THE THINGS I LOVE ABOUT IT (every thing, every last detail!!! Is that a little you in the middle? Is that the Easter egg???? I could just pick you up and pat your little head!!! 😭 I know you don’t love hugs but that’s how I’ll be standing if you’re ever ready for one!!!)
I should slow down maybe and pick a few things to focus on BUT I JUST CANT I LOVE IT ALL!!!! The two scenes just blend so well into one another that my eyes are just naturally being drawn back and forth between both of the scenery! Dinraal, who turned out AMAZIING BY THE WAY, ABSOLUTELY NOT OVERDONE, if anything I’m so glad you had fun working on her!!! She’s so gorgeous!!!! I bet your friend is so so proud of how well she looks!!! Oh but anyway, Dinraal naturally leads my eyes over to the sun/moon (and the 24, hehe, thank you!!! /)//(\ Your memory is astounding!!), which have their own beautiful rays of light leading down onto the adorable couples 😭 I love love LOVE the moonlight leading down onto Tonari and Fushi, and the fact that she’s pointing at it too like she can almost reach it? Beautiful! Gorgeous!!! And it just leads my eyes down to them too, there’s just such a natural circular flow here, no wonder I keep getting caught in a loop of admiration! 😁
The blues and the pinks, and the stars on the ToFu side!!! I just noticed them and they’re everything to me!!!! Hahaha I’m so glad Tonari was relaxing to color hehe, same for me, something about her is just so lovely and calming when she’s relaxed 🥰 As for Fushi’s colors, I didn’t notice! Even after you pointed it out it looks good to me! ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ this is from someone who never references colors though, I’m so loosey goosey about everything -w- BUT YOUR SOLUTION TO YOUR PROBLEM WAS GREAT, THEIR SHAPE IS VERY VISIBLE AND EASY TO MAKE OUT hehe :3 I love their crossed little legs 🥰
Zelda being your kin is so good to know hehe, I’ve always been drawn to all versions of Link myself! I think we’ve been perfectly set up to “play dolls” with these characters in the future, so to speak! Aaaahh they can’t have been easy to draw, there’s a reason I almost never dabble in drawing those two and their intricate outfits, but you make it look effortless!!! Zelda’s shirt turned out amazing, and I’m stuck looking at her little triangle braids!!!! I don’t know why I’m so fixated on that it’s just adorable!!! 😭💕 What a lovely technique, man, I’m so enchanted! AND THE MASTER SWORD, I know you called it cheating BUT I LOVE THE LINE WORK, it makes the sword stand out, almost like you lined that specific part with some sort of melted gold??? Aaaaaaaaaahhhhhh!!!!!
This is gorgeous and beautiful in every which way and thank you!!!! For everything!!! For this beautiful drawing and for giving me a chance to ramble and giving me something gorgeous to look at for the rest of my day, and for indulging in both of my silly little ships /)//(\ I’m so glad I don’t need glasses because I love every inch of your art, thank you thank you THANK YOU!!!!! Gosh it’s so so so lovely 😭💕 you’re so lovely!!!!
I don’t know how to say goodbye so I guess I’ll just say good night for now! Thank you for thinking of me… I’ll have a wonderful day, so long as you promise me you’ll have a wonderful night along side me 🥰
Goodnight, Mai Bruzha!
- Nova
#Lyn the Zelda Kin (I’ll come up with a better tag some day I PROMISE 💕 haha!!!)#Friend Rambles 💕💕💕#long post#IM SO STOKED YOU HAVE NO IDEA AAAHHHHHHHHHH KICKING MY FEET#I’m typing the tags before I actually type the main body heehee I’m gonna jump over the moon!!!!!#and thank you for the letter too I’ve been rereading it! I’ve been getting back into writing letters of my own and wow!!!#the quality of yours are amazing!! I may have to take a note or two on how to craft a good one that one was amazing!! and thank you :’)#ok editing: this nova back after her ramble in the body text#I’m sorry for how disjointed this all looks! I kind of tackled my response based on where I was looking at at any given time#and I wanted to get my reply back before you hit the sheets for the night!!! still it took me some time but I hope I made it!!!#ahhh Lyn I hope you rest well! I’m going to have an amazing birthday and you’re a contributing factor in that my friend.. Mai Bruzha!!!#I know for a fact I’m forgetting details too like just the fact that I love the idea of Tonari and Fushi chilling at night#chatting and looking at the stars and enjoying each other’s company. my favorite scenes of them are always them shrouded in darkness and#covered in some sort of fireside lighting I just!!!!!! they’re so good in the dark thank you for drawing them at night#they are a moon couple to me… and ZeLink is a sun couple to me like idk how you got all these details DOWN about me! maybe we see the world#similarly :3 good to know I have someone in the world who sees them the way I do 😁#aahhhh I’ll let you get off to sleep now dear friend!!! and thank you again! thank you thank you thank you!!!!#this is truly shaping up to be the best birthday ever!
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bluesmoth · 2 years
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They settle and the vet rocks them, a hand playing with the braids in Warriors' hair, hums and it's okays getting kissed into his bangs.
hey so carved  //  hollowed    by @quirkle2 made me feel emotions. hello linked universe nation
#SO AJRHBGKAJRHBL#IVE BEEN WORKING ON THIS FOR. HOURS#i made 90% of this while on my pain meds so if you see any mistakes no u dont <3#im SO soft for them jay you have NO idea#saw you posted a 20000 word warriors hurt/comfort fic and went OH??????? like a cartoon character#this is the first time ive ever completed a comic page too!!!  man. csp frame borders were an Experience#BUT JFSBKLAHBRLAK ANYWAY#THANK YOU FOR SHARING YOUR FIC WITH THE FANDOM I ATE IT LIKE A BIG BOWL OF WARM SOUP#your warriors literally lands so perfectly into my Circle of Characters That I Deeply Enjoy and i love him :)#i want good things for warriors. he can have some hurt/comfort. as a treat. good for him. thank u op for my life#lu warriors#lu legend#linked universe#also i loved the part in the fic where they go to wars' era and so much of it is just so unwelcoming to him. like....#his house doesnt feel like his. his 'friends' (artemis n impa) dont feel like friends. his people arent his people. not really#and knowing that later down the line he'll be completely disowned and banished really puts it all into perspective that#maybe it was his home once. maybe when he was a child and his mother was still alive to take him by the hand and show him the warm parts#of his era. but she's long gone. and maybe the warmth went with her too. the last of it stored in his scarf.#so he'll have to find that warmth somewhere else. glad that ledge and the others can be that warmth for him. god damn#feeling emotions in this chili's tonight..... im....... Oh My God...... could ramble about this All Night#thank you quirkle :)#this is the first fandom/non oc-related thing ive drawn in years. hallelujah#i am. so tired KARJBGALKJRBLKA#GOOD NIGHT LINKED UNIVERSE NATION#blues draws#maybe that can become a more regularly used tag! perhaps. perchance to dream
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natsubane · 4 months
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watched all the available episodes of sousou no frieren today and surprised myself with how much i enjoyed it so i want to leave my thoughts here before i forget them; i think it would've been a lot more enjoyable if i was catching it from the start, but i ended up crying more than several times anyway
it's such a good concept to begin with, the storytelling is so compelling, and i really enjoyed the atmosphere in every episode. the worldbuilding is very good, we never really get exposition dumped but we learn things as the characters do, which keeps things believable and easy to stomach... plus, we always see stories about the defeat of the demon king, and much less the story of the aftermath, which got me interested in it in the first place. and especially when you add in the factor of time as a matter of inconsequence to frieren in comparison to everyone else especially with her personality... it's so satisfying seeing the exploration of things like the delicate balance between memories of the past and their inability to be changed with how they have influenced and shaped growth (of both the characters and the world) into the present, the passing of time and its varying (in)significance to the characters caught in its flow, the transience of life and (the learning of) what it means to live...
even then the flow of time passing is animated so well; there's this relentlessness to its passing, but despite that it flows like a calm river, clear and constant and steady, never hurrying, never drying. and mage's comment about it showcasing perfectly how frieren stays the same despite time passing is really neat too. on the flip side seeing how things have changed over time (the borrowing, adaptation, improvement of spells from demons which then go on to be adopted by mages is something i really fucking liked!! and the way fern uses the magic so casually as a way to demonstrate the development of magic turning a death spell into 'ordinary offensive magic' is so so good. frieren using this to teach her a history lesson was Also really good.)
it's hard to dislike any of the main characters when they show such strong cohesion of their complex pasts and personalities, and their actions do so well to showcase who they are even in battle (fern's precision and blunt simplicity stands out here). you can even see how they have changed each other over the course of their journey... frieren wanting to give up on finding the lost ring so not to slow the party down but fern insisting they'll stay until she finds it contrasting with her impatience with frieren spending months trying to find the blue moon weed at the beginning of their journey is something that stuck with me a lot
the other thing that stuck with me is the rebuilding of the original party not only thematically within their roles but also in influence by the original heroes (fern being taught by frieren and their noted similarity in the earlier episodes with regards to magic, stark being taught by eisen and the same way they express and approach fear, sein's choice not to become an adventurer being directly influenced by heiter not to mention their obvious similarities in habits)... and of those it's really fitting how frieren represents himmel's hero role now after she was influenced by her journey with himmel, especially with his death giving immense meaning to her new journey and frieren copying his actions because it's what he would do
but i enjoyed it... will be back next week..... waha.............
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coconut530 · 8 months
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🥖🧈
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hella1975 · 7 months
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my mum picking me up this morning: you're not as hungover as i thought you'd be
me, just yacked in an alleyway: yeah haha
#it's 3pm now and i still cant believe that happened that was. an experience#basically my mate's 21st coincided with her sister's 30th so they both had this big joint Event last night#where they literally rented out a farm house and the field nearby and set up a whole campsite and barbeque and everything#it was really random but also really good esp bc ive been friends with this girl since we were super young#and our mums were friends so ive just got. lots of connections to her family and it was nice seeing them all again#but there was fully like 60 people at this thing and i DID drink more than i meant to but i wasn't paralytic which is good#and my hangover ISNT that bad in terms of how bad my hangovers can get#it's just that my mate's dad picked us both up at 9am this morning which was already going to be... rough#and then proceeded to do the bumpiest drive down the country lanes ive ever experienced#i was literally grinding my teeth like i am NOT about to throw up in this man's car please if there is a god do not let me throw up#and i didn't! my mum picked me up from this (thankfully very quiet) road that has this rickety old alley coming off it#and i had the very humbling moment of 'im actually going to be sick aren't i' and had to WAIT FOR AN OLD WOMAN#TO FUCKING MEANDER OUT OF THE ALLEY AND WALK FAR AWAY ENOUGH FOR ME TO AT LEAST HAVE A SHRED OF DIGNITY#and proceeded to throw up. in a public alleyway. at 9:30am on a sunday. so of course i needed to tell you guys about it#im now force feeding myself garlic bread. im going to manchester tomorrow. i have a flight at the crack of dawn on tuesday#what is even going on anymore#also fully did just do nos last night with some 30 year olds. i cannot express how fucking odd a thing that is for me to do#actually no i can express it bc youse know that im funny about drugs so for me to not even be that drunk#and get offered a fucking balloon of all things and be like 'yeah why not!' is.... odd#i know i inhaled wrong though bc it didn't do a thing which honestly im happy about <3#hella goes home
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girlcrushau · 4 days
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#me? about to use tumblr as a diary again? in 2024? unfortunately:/#but here have a waterfall i saw on a hike last week as payment#i am sO tired and exhausted emotionally after dating#there's this guy that i fr thought was going to last and be around for a long time. we spent like every moment together that we could for 2#months straight and if we werent physicaly together we were texting or calling or on ft . just every part of our day had the other in it#not once did i ever feel unwanted undesired or uncared for. not once did i feel that i wasnt sure of his intentions. i felt safer with him#in those 2 months than i ever did with any one else i could think to compare to.#until one day he just didnt think it important to communicate any more. after 3 days of nearly nothing .. hardly any talking . i asked if#he was ok if we were ok. what was going on in his head. he said some ive just been with my buddies and family and havent been on my phone#and just. immediately thats heartbreak yanno. thats :// thats what they say when theres a new girl. but there'd never been a reason to think#there was another girl so i was like ok we're gonna trust bc this dude has been So good in every way. so i said imy but i understand. enjoy#your time with your buddies and with your fam -- i cant wait to hear about it (and hold you)#and i havent heard from him in the 3 weeks since. just randomly#so last night#i send the dreaded 'i miss you' text.#i dont expect to hear back and i accept the hurt that will come with that and the confusion that i've felt settles deeper into my heart#until this afternoon i hop on ig and see a hard launch that was posted an hour after my text was sent#that shit kinda hurt different. but also sent me into a bit of a delirious state where all i could do is laugh bc are you for fucking real#did she see my message? i know it. bc i know him and i know that he wouldnt hide anything from the person he's giving his heart#and his softness to. i can almost imagine how he showed her and promised her theres nothing to worry about#and there really isnt anything to worry about because he genuinely is the type to give his all to the relationship he's in#which feels silly to say after what happened w us. like no there wasnt a title ever#it sucks to call it a situationship because a month ago we were laughing in bed together about how we could never bc we were all in.#just the timing of the hard launch makes me giggle. did my text push them to have a conversation about what they are. was she really the#reason that he went away on me.#im trying not to blame myself . trying not to think about the phone calls i didnt answer. about what i could have done differently. trying#not to think about where we would be if i didnt let my anxieties hold me back. if i wasnt scared about what he'd think of the parts of me#that i keep hidden just a little bit longer than the rest.#and at the same time im trying not to put him on a pedestal. but that pedestal is just where i wholeheartedly believe he belongs#he set the bar for me. he set the standard. i was never too much. i was never too little. he made me feel perfect just as i am
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kirinoha · 5 days
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atalana · 18 days
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having one of those nights where i'm just. extremely frustrated about fatphobia's existence and the fact that whatever i do to try and change it will be a drop in the ocean and there'll always be people who think i'm just saying this because i'm lazy
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