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#friends to enemies
gabzs-002 · 4 hours
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⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅ Just a short lil doodle of one of the saddest ships that changed the trajectory of my life idk ⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅
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⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅
⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅
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#214
"You look better, really."
"Yeah? Can't say the same about you."
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allyricas · 6 months
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there's just something so delicious about friends-to enemies-to lovers
barely teenage steve and eddie who have a devastating end to what they both thought would be a forever friendship. maybe it's a misunderstanding or maybe it's just teenage angst that felt impossible to fix in the moment.
but i am feral over the idea that the only reason steve ever became 'king steve' strutting around with tommy and carol with his aloof, semi-mean girl attitude was because of the falling out with eddie. that he did it so he didn't feel so much hurt over it. still has no idea what he did to make eddie suddenly hate him.
same with eddie. he definitely liked metal and nerdy shit all along, but maybe he only leaned into the whole 'forced conformity, it's what's killing the kids' freak persona to guard himself. as armor. because he fucking misses steve as much as he hates him. so he glares and makes snarky comments. finds his solace in DnD and his band.
they fight with words and shoulder shoves in the hallway. each of them too proud to ever talk it out and fix things. to the point that their peers don't remember that steve and eddie used to be inseparable. everyone but steve and eddie forget the obvious affection and closeness they once shared.
it takes a bunch of freshmen to put them back into each other's orbit.
it takes the upside down, a dead cheerleader and an evil wizard for them to actually get along again.
because steve is meant to hate eddie but the moment he sees the trailer and hears the word 'murder' he feels like he might throw up.
Please, god, not eddie.
only to find out he supposedly murdered chrissy cunningham. despite all the animosity between the two of them, steve knows in his soul that eddie would never kill anyone.
even when he's against a wall with sharp glass pressed to his neck, heart racing as he looks into the eyes he tries not to think about, steve knows that eddie won't actually hurt him.
steve has the urge to stay with eddie at the lake house and make sure nothing else happens to him. instead, he stops forcing himself to be an asshole towards eddie. it's exhausting and he's never truly meant it anyways. the upside-down shit is threatening the one person he hoped would never be a part of it.
it takes eddie watching steve get pulled under lover's lake and attacked by demon bats to realize that the biggest misunderstanding was of his own thirteen year old self's feelings. that he could've lost steve and he'd have never even told him the truth of why he let their friendship implode over such a ridiculous misunderstanding.
that he wanted more than friendship and that scared the hell out of him at thirteen.
he sees steve bleeding and throwing himself into danger over and over. realizes that yeah, steve harrington is a good guy. his own personal munson doctrine is fundamentally flawed and untrustworthy and he's in love with this stupidly brave man, maybe since forever.
make him pay means i'm sorry, i love you, please be safe, come back.
it takes eddie nearly dying and his steve carrying him out of hell for eddie to realize that steve never hated him either. that what eddie always views as aloofness and superiority was hurt and steve trying to deal. regardless of whatever lays in the past, steve holds him together with his hands and begs eddie to stay. whispers that he loves him, always has loved him, always will love him.
eddie thinks about all the years they lost due to teenage angst and fear. fights to keep his eyes open and stay, because steve his sobbing and begging him not to go.
and when eddie finally wakes up in the hospital, it's steve and uncle wayne next to him. steve won't leave his side, maybe ever again. neither of them with any desire to ever look at each other with anything but love.
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milkinore · 26 days
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As much as I love one sided Radiostatic I do NOT have it in me to finish this so take this half done sketch of them abt to go at each other 🐺
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clairebishop6226 · 9 months
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Society's prejudice destroyed this beautiful friendship.
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please don't blame Gloreth, she was as innocent as Nimona back then, people are not born bad, society corrupts them.
I am not defending Gloreth's actions, so expressing an opinion on:
I understand that it's hard to look at Gloreth's point of view as their actions resulted in a hypocritical false hero system in the future, but I wanted to remind you that the legend of Gloreth has been altered for millennia as society's way of masking the truth about what they are afraid of, in legend Gloreth is a grown woman, like shining armor and a golden sword, but the reality is that it all started with the friendship of two girls and a sad end where a child wields a toy sword to scare someone who was considered a friend, it still hurts to remember that Gloreth created an entire society of lies, but I don't think it was all her credit, the so famous heroine was as commoner as Ballister who was judged all his life because of its origin, those who remain in power always distort the truth, people like the director have existed for millennia, I'm not claiming anything, I'm just saying that I don't believe that all that was set up and thought of by someone who, at the beginning, didn't even bother to create a friendship with a shapeshifter, the first time Nimona transforms in front of Gloreth she looks at the village already thinking about what would happen if other people found out and decided to keep their friendship a secret from her family.
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tookthe-405 · 22 days
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On our way
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loser!ellie x ex-bsf!reader
Summary: You and Ellie grew up as best friends, everywhere you were, she was there too. But one night changed everything and you still have no idea what happened, only that Ellie wants nothing to do with you anymore.
So what would happen if the both of you would go on a little Roadtrip?
c.w: there are gonna be some in the future!!
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✮ ┈➤ PROLOGUE
✮ ┈➤ CHAPTER: 1
✮ ┈➤ FLASHBACK 1
✮ ┈➤ CHAPTER: 2
more…
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prairieenyasblog · 17 days
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guysb. i can’t stop thinking about them…… in the roof.. uagh
(nobody comment abt the made up poses)
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hiimmirka · 1 year
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I watched Code Geass for the first time of my entire life in early 2023, being very late for the party
It had everything I like:
Mecha fights with really important strategic aspects, very interesting lore, action oriented and suspenseful moments, a Greek tragedy-like plot with our two favorite characters...
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Trauma Baby™ and Pathetic man (of the day)
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(I actually decided to draw them like that after seeing someone suggesting to draw our babygirls (derogatory term) in these poses. Suzalulu are so f ing tragic I love them haha)
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dreorcaul · 20 days
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its a wip for the moment! cassunzel fans I haven't forgotten about you!
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nerdestiwrites · 27 days
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predator and prey, chapter two (hazbin hotel reader insert)
The trip to the less than three star looking hotel had been a rather uneventful one, which was more than what most people hoped for in a day in Hell. It had just been less than a full twenty four hours since the announcement of the accelerated deadline of the next Extermination and the streets were filled with sinners freaking out and causing chaos, doing every sin possible. That wasn’t any different than any other day, but it seemed to even bring out those who seemed to have more self control than others. 
The hotel itself wasn’t inspiring but you’ve lived in worse and had friends that lived in worse so you weren’t going to complain. Rent was expensive, especially in Hell, and you couldn’t imagine the cost for any building to own. Being the princess of Hell seemed to have it’s perks, but even perks had downsides.
You walked up the hill towards the looming hotel, your eyes scanning over the exterior as your head tilted to the side briefly. A ship seemed to have been embedded into the framework of the hotel itself and there was an eyesore of a radio tower hanging off the roof of it, and if you were being honest with yourself, you weren’t entirely sure how one entered the radio tower. 
Stopping at the front door, you took in a sharp breath as you lifted your hand to knock. The sounds of arguing from inside made you hesitate for just a moment, were you supposed to knock? It was a hotel after all, you never knocked on a hotel’s door before when you were living, was it different because it was Hell? Or because it was the Princess’? 
Before you could think of the different cultural differences there might be you haven’t experienced yet, you walked through the doors, opting out of knocking. You smiled brightly, putting on a perfect customer service persona you learned quickly got you better tips when you served back when you had been alive. “Hi!” You said excitedly, giving a small wave. 
Inside the main area of the room, the lobby you would’ve called it, stood three people. Two were standing near a couch, both now staring at you in shock, one with excitement speckled in, and the third behind a bar that looked out of place considering the rest of the decor of the interior of the hotel. The blonde raced forwards and pulled your hand into her own, shaking it enthusiastically, a wide smile on her face. You shook back, just as enthuisastically, meeting her energy, best have a good impression.
“Hi! I’m Charlie!” She explained as she let go of your hand, seeming to be vibrating with excitement at your presence within the hotel. She motioned the other to approach, who did and seemed to eye you suspiciously. 
You in turn say your name and glanced around the lobby once more. “I saw just the brief start of your commercial- didn’t really get to see all of it with the interruption of the news. But I figured I’d come check it out, is that okay?” 
Charlie nodded quickly and motioned for you to step further into the lobby, motioning around as she spun, “Of course! This is the Hazbin Hotel! Our goal here is to take sinners and rehabilitate them so they might get a chance at redemption and go to Heaven!” 
That certainly was something. A chance at redemption, you hadn’t even thought of that as a possibility. Once you realized you were in Hell, you figured that was it, that you’d always be in Hell, unless killed. A chance to go through the pearly gates and maybe see your family again had completely left your mind. You weren’t even sure if you wanted to go to Heaven, with your plan and all. 
It was clear from the look on the others face that it hadn’t yet been proven to even actually happen yet, that this whole thing was just a new concept they were attempting. It was noble, to say the least, to try and save the souls who had been condemned for eternity only to be killed again. You still weren’t sure what happened when a soul was killed for a second time. Was there a super hell? A second afterlife? Would it really be worse than Hell? 
Charlie grabbed your attention from your thoughts as she motioned towards the person standing next to her. “This is Vaggie, and over there is our bartender Husk! This is the parlor where we’ll be doing our daily activities to try and reform sinners, everyone will have a room of their own, and somewhere around here is Nifty our house keeper and Alastor is out for the day but he’s usually here as well.”
That caught your attention. Alastor, the Radio Demon, who had been missing for seven years, was here at the hotel meant to redeem souls. So, he wasn’t dead then, and seemed to be playing house with the princess of Hell. Perhaps he had a similar idea as you did, get close to the princess in hopes of earning favor with her. You made a low hum, keeping your surprise to yourself. “I’m not entirely sold on the whole redemption thing just yet… After all I haven’t even been in Hell for a year yet. There’s still so much I haven’t seen.” You joked, giving a half smile.
At your words you could see Charlie deflate slightly, the excitement and enthusiasm dying down slightly. She however nodded, not intending to try and force you to stay if you didn’t want to. She stared at you momentarily before giving another smile, still warm, still welcoming. The princess seemed like a good soul, someone who definitely didn’t deserve to be in Hell, cursed to be due to who her parents were. 
“I’m gonna think about it though. So if I’m back in a few days, don’t be surprised.” You continued as you took a step forwards, grabbing Charlies hand, and shaking it gently.
She returned the gesture, shaking your hand back before letting go. “Yes- yes of course! I’ll make sure Nifty gets a room cleaned up fo ryou, just in case. And don’t even worry if you decide against it, I’m sure we’ll have more people wanting to be redeemed at any moment.” 
You could hear the confidence in her voice, you could see it plastered across her face, her motivation and thrive to redeem those around her, save them, it reminded you of your younger siblings. And the reminder that they were still alive, or at least you hoped they were still alive, up on Earth, having had to go to your funeral, mourn you, caused a grief you hadn’t expected to feel. You never even thought about how they might be doing until just then. 
“Right-” You cleared your throat to ensure it didn’t crack at the sudden wave of emotions hitting her chest, the hurt wrapping around your heart. “Well, good to hear I’ll have a room! Hoping for little chocolate mints on my pillow and free shampoos.” Joking was a good coping mechanism and defense mechanism. Distracting from yourself and keeping the mood lighthearted. 
“I do have to go though, thank you for talking with me and telling me about the hotel though!” You waved as you turned quickly to leave the hotel, not giving the residents a chance to respond to your departure. You needed to be alone, you dealt with your emotions best alone. That didn’t change just because you were dead and in Hell. 
The journey home was one that you barely could remember, too stuck in your thoughts to pay any attention to your environment around you. That would normally have been incredibly dangerous, to walk down the streets of Hell without any perception of what was going on around you, but even demons who had half a mind seemed to see that bothering you in that moment wouldn’t end well for them. 
The first time in just under a year you felt homesick. The first time in just under a year you missed your little siblings. You missed your friends, your pets, fuck, you missed your pets. They wouldn’t have even understood the reason you never came home that night. They would’ve thought you just abandoned them- that you didn’t want them anymore. You hoped beyond hope that your roommates, your parents, someone took them in. 
You made it to your small apartment, that just this morning you would’ve called home, but now it felt empty and cold. You stared from the doorway, imagining how things could’ve been different, how you could still be alive, what you could be doing if you were still alive. It was a good thing you didn’t have this spiral when you first arrived in Hell, who knows what might’ve happened. 
A text tone snapped you out of your stupor and you glanced down at the phone in your hands, the screen brightness burning your eyes in contrast to your dark apartment. It was from Velvette but your brain wasn’t processing what she had sent. You blinked a few times as your eyes narrowed, seeing a picture of Valentino seemingly having a full blown meltdown over something, the picture capturing a moment of mid throwing some poor soul across the room. 
You: hate him. Want to grab a drink?
Getting out of your dark lonely apartment seemed like a good idea, and being alone seemed better. You enjoyed hanging out with Velvette but knew that with her busy schedule of being apart of the Vs and an overlord it was rare for just the two of you to hang out. Especially since your friendship was still hidden from the other Vs, and Vox seemed to have cameras everywhere. 
Velvy: got an hour left here in the studio
Velvy: meet at HornPub?
You: be there
You turned, opened the door, and stepped out back onto the streets of Hell, heading down to the small bar that was uncreatively named. A drink or ten was exactly what you needed to get your mind off of the what ifs and hypotheticals. You knew you were going an hour early, two hours as you knew Velvette had the habit of running late, but you figured you’d get a headstart and maybe pull in a few deals, gain a few more favors owed while waiting and drinking. And, who better than to vent to than the bartender. It was like therapy but you could get drunk at the same time.
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saltandfire-blog · 4 months
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When you realize your ship is manifested from Fox and the Hound 😅❤️
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quartzalynlove · 11 months
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Reunion
Pairing: dazai x fem! Ability user! Reader
Summary: the first time you and dazai meet after he left the port mafia
A/N: this might be my favorite one shot in a while
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~
Chuuya was one of your closest friends. You, him, and Dazai had been one great trio until that night Dazai betrayed the port mafia. He was always annoying to you, but ever since that night he slipped from the underground without so much as a word, you hated Dazai.
Unfortunately for you and Chuuya, Mori made a deal with Fukuzawa that made the port mafia and the detective agency allies for the time being. Chuuya was a little more than pissed at this development, and for some God awful reason, you were a good friend. You and Chuuya both knew that he was going to be teamed with Dazai for a mission, but you owed Chuuya a favor. Long story short, after some sucking up to the boss, you convinced him to have you take Chuuya's place and spare him of Dazai's insufferable company.
Dazai was already at the meeting spot, but he was taken by surprised when he wasn't greeted by annoyed growling. Instead, he heard your kitten heels clicking down the alley and that calm silence you always carried with you.
You saw that devil's smile form as you walked closer. That grating voice you thought you had long forgotten entered your eardrums once again.
"Well, if it isn't Y/N L/N."
Your face was like stone in his presence; you walked past Dazai, barely acknowledging him.
"Dazai."
He began following behind you out of the alley and towards the location of your objective.
"Aw, sister, you're not still mad at me are you? All that was so long ago."
He spoke with the tongues of snakes and the cadence of a fox. You were almost disgusted with yourself for calling the slippery eel behind you your friend once.
"I'm not upset in the slightest. I just prefer not to ally myself with traitors."
"Ouch," Dazai feigned offense. "I remember you being a little sweetheart for a trained interrogator, what happened, sister?"
The second time he called you that, you snapped. Stopping in your tracks, you whipped yourself around to face Dazai. He had never seen so much hate in your eyes as your ability's aura blazed around you and your dress started flowing in the angry wind; it was intriguing.
"I'm not your sister," you formed your words into daggers, but they were hardly a poke to the man in front of you.
You were the only one between you two that was hurt; you had always known that. Wasting your anger was pointless. Turned back around, you muttered the rest of your sentence. "Not anymore."
Dazai smiled and you felt a pit in the bottom of your stomach. It was going to be a long day, still, you had a mission to finish.
Neither of you had talked since leaving the meeting point. Relief washed over you as you were almost at the base you were sent to infiltrate, maybe you wouldn't have to deal too much with Dazai.
There were too many nights. Too many nights you spent alone in your room wondering why your closest friend would leave your home and your friendship without a word. Why he would leave for the enemy. All those years you knew he didn't care; it was probably just another game for him. Still, it was by far his sickest yet.
At least it was easy. For the first time in his life Dazai wasn't talking, and you didn't have to look at him. However, it was like Dazai knew. He knew you were calm with these conditions, and that was simply too boring.
"Sister, I've got a question," he said. "I thought I was doing this mission with Chuuya, so how'd I end up with you? Don't tell me there's some unresolved tension you simply needed to confront?"
"Don't flatter yourself," you threw back at him. "Chuuya swore he'd kill you if he saw you again, so I convinced the boss to have me take his place."
Your words were so cold, nothing like the Y/N Dazai used to know. Even though you had your dark side, you were kind for a member of the mafia. You were caring too. Seeing how Dazai was the reason that love had waxed cold was nice for him in a way. Depite your childish quarrels, the both of you always had one thing in common. The only reason the two of you were the mafia's best interrogators was because you loved your job. You liked breaking people, relishing in the horrors that left their minds.
"Isn't that cute." Dazai laughed under his breath.
"Excuse me?"
Dazai passed you before blocking your way.
"I think I just realized something."
You tried to walk around him. "Is that so?"
"I'd be worried if I wasn't hated for betraying the mafia like I did, but" Dazai crossed his arms. "I don't think it's hate I see when you look at me. You're hurt."
Your face twisted into anger once again, but you could never extinguish that pained blaze in your eyes.
"Yeah right, like I said, Dazai, don't flatter yourself."
"Oh, I'm not," he laughed. "But I have to admit, you're flattering me just a bit, sister."
You felt your blood boil in your veins; you were just about ready to punch Dazai out of your way.
"Shut up!"
As Dazai stepped closer, your teeth grit. Every cell in your body wanted say damn the truce and attack, but you couldn't will yourself to. It wasn't for the mafia's sake, it wasn't because you knew Mori would be pissed; it was...you didn't know.
"If I remember correctly, you always hated when I called you that. I can't believe I never realized why."
Dazai was inches away. Looking at him hurt, being that close made your soul feel like it was being torn apart. You couldn't even bring yourself to shout at him.
"Stop talking." Turned your head down with clenched fists.
But he didn't stop. He just had to finish that thought.
"You never wanted to be my sister."
All of your anger hit a boiling point, but you didn't know what to do with it. The one to lose their temper in battle is the one to taste defeat, and you would die before you gave him that satisfaction. Still, staying silent meant giving Dazai more room to talk.
"You mind if I make a few predictions? I've become a decent detective in my time with the agency."
He took your frozen silence as a yes.
"You never wanted to be my sister, Y/N...you wanted to be my lover. I'm sure you know the reason you're so valuable as an interrogator. The ability to manipulate emotions is a powerful one. You could induce a soul crushing despair to make your victim lose hope in the secrets they're protecting or a stomach churning guilt to make them spit it all up, and your favorite, if I can remember, was turning them in so many directions that they went mad from not having control of their mind anymore. I remember how you used to look at me, but it wasn't with the shy eyes a typical school girl flashed at her crush. It was with curiosity. You were wondering if your ability would work on someone like me. Was that how desperate you were for me to reciprocate those feelings?"
You were seething where you stood. Damn him, damn that sly smile that never left his face, damn those questioning eyes piercing through your soul. What did he know? Where did these ridiculous delusions spawn from in his mind?
You heard Dazai laugh.
"Don't get all shy, now. I bet if I got even closer," he took a step forward. "Your face would feel just like fire, your heart would start racing like a hare; you'd even have trouble standing straight."
Dazai took your chin between his thumb and forefinger and turned your head to look at him. His touch was electrifying and you hated it. As if that wasn't enough he leaned in closer. You felt his breath on the shell of your ear as he spoke.
"So tell me, did I crack the case?"
Fed up with Dazai's antics you swung your forearm into his abdomen, pushing him against the wall of the alley he wouldn't let you enter. Even as you grabbed him by the shirt and forced him into the brick, he simply let you and giggled to himself like a child.
"I swear I'll kill you someday."
It wasn't until Dazai opened his eyes to look at you that you realized what you had done.
"I don't think I'd be against it."
Not only were your threats not affecting Dazai, but your grip on his shrit, the fire in your eyes.
Damn it
You let him go, your hand shaking as it came back to your side. That sly, slippery bastard still had it, didn't he?
The one to lose their temper in battle is the one to taste defeat.
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writing-to-survive · 1 month
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#199
"Did you ever enjoy being my friend?"
"I've never felt more alive being with you. I really wish it didn't have to end"
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thatmexisaurusrex · 3 months
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From That Show
This fic is for @jemgirl86 for @sambuckylibrary's SamBucky Gift Event. It's a little angstier than my usual fics, but it organically became that way and I think it just makes sense like that. And it's a holiday fic, so you know I'll make it sweet in the end. Anyway, I hope you enjoy the fic, Shana, and thank you for getting me to write it again!
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From That Show
| Pairing: SamBucky | Rated: M | WC: 21.2K | Chapters: 5/5 |
Summary: Sam Wilson and Bucky Barnes were once best friends working on the same sitcom. Now, five years after Bucky mysteriously quit and abruptly cut all contact with Sam, they bump into each other during the holidays in their hometown of Delacroix.
Excerpt:
"I feel like I’ve seen you around before,” said the man, and Sam was about to shut whatever bullshit this man was going to say down but then the man lit up and blurted, “Wilson Family Seafood! I worked on your boat every summer during high school. You were in my sister’s grade – Becca Barnes.” Sam gaped. “Bucky Barnes,” said Sam as his mind raced. Sam remembered him vaguely. Bucky had been older by a few years. A little intimidating despite his kind nature and goofy disposition. Maybe it was because he was a little older. Maybe it was because Bucky always seemed to be walking around shirtless on the boat during the hot Delacroix summers. “Didn’t your sister blow up one of the chemistry classrooms?” asked Sam. Bucky laughed. “She got a few chemicals mixed up,” said Bucky like he had to tell this to a million people, “Also, it didn’t blow up. She just… gently singed the room.”
READ THE REST ON AO3!
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gingerly-writing · 8 months
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Prompt #3443
"You always wanted to spar with me." Their old friend spread their arms wide. "Now's your chance."
"This isn't sparring! This is a death match."
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a-spes · 4 months
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hello! i noticed ur taking requests! this is hella detailed so no worries if u dont wanna write! one with female reader x nat (preferably platonic but either works). the averages break up. they are done. Officially. nat and r were friends on the avengers and worked together a lot. when the avengers broke up, everyone tried to move on or settle down. nat doesn't. nat, missing the action, reverts back to her time as a for-hire assassin. With the connections from her time as an assassin pre-SHIELD she builds a name for herself. She becomes the most feared assassin yet again and a ruthless criminal. no one can stop her and she’s very dangerous. Finally, reader, working for the government now, and faces Nat for the first time in years… as enemies with r trying to take Nat down. Nat has the upper hand with her network of spies and criminals. But does Nat really hurt her? She has the ability to with her skill and network of assassins. Does r get what they want and take Nat down? ANYWAYS this is long and kinda specific; but thank you so much! Love all your writing!
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S T O L E N F R E E D O M - One shot.
Words count - 5,1k.
Tags & Warnings - villain!Natasha Romanoff x fem!Reader (platonic, enemies), mentions of death/violence/blood, angst.
Moodboard here.
N/A - Hope you'll enjoy it and it's not too far from what you were expecting! It's the first time I am writing for a request and I really enjoyed it, so thanks for dropping it <3
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It’s past two in the morning and you are alone in the office. Only the night guards are here but they don't dare to ask you if everything is fine. The past months, they've got used to you staying that late and learned to not ask too many questions. From time to time, you could hear their muffled voices and steps breaking the thick silence. 
But it’s not their presence that is slowly driving you crazy: it is the regular ticking of the wall clock. It seems to be the only thing you can hear, it’s even louder than your thoughts, and being unable to concentrate is only adding to your frustration. You are not far from crying because of how hopeless you are feeling.
If you've got into the habit of spending most of your nights at work, it’s only because of how incompetent you are, unable to complete the task assigned to you. A few months ago, you found a file on your desk and, if at first you thought it would be as easy as the previous ones, you were wrong. You quickly changed your mind when you only saw a long list of deaths but nothing else. For the first time, you've found yourself struggling to complete a mission.
You were looking for a ghost.
The only proof you have of their existence are the crimes they commited, the cold bodies they’re leaving behind them. Even the autopsy didn't give any information about how it happened, it’s almost like the victims just died on their own. This mission makes you regret how cocky you acted in the past. You used to think that you could complete every mission, even the most difficult ones, but eventually realized that it doesn't matter if you are among the most skilled S.H.I.E.L.D agents because there is always someone better than you are. 
This time, you were as lost as your colleagues, understanding what they're usually going through. Slowly, you've become so obsessed with this mission that you couldn't think about anything else. You are trapped in a toxic loop with your work and, if you thought the time you would act like that was long gone, you were wrong: this mission is taking you back to your worst era again.
In the morning, you are the first one to be here, but you are also the last one to leave the place - when you do, sometimes spending the whole night here just so you don’t lose time going home and coming back. It is rare that you think about eating, your mind being completely absorbed by the task. Again, you were that young adult that wanted to prove their worth to everyone, seeking validation.
Despite everything, you keep telling Fury that everything is fine. You know that he doesn't believe you, but he knows better than pushing, trusting his agent to ask for help when it's needed, but he forgot how stubborn you can be. He is divided between worries to see you so exhausted and the urge for the mission to be completed as quickly as possible.
Even if he is trying to keep those deaths a secret for as long as possible, pretending on the news that they aren't related, just misfortune, he knows he won't be able to lie indefinitely. People are going to question what's happening and it's obvious that he can’t admit that there is a crazy assassin roaming freely around the country. 
For the moment, only a few agents are aware about the file, only the best ones. If anyone can do it, it's you, that's what he keeps telling himself to ease the guilt he is feeling whenever he sees you so exhausted. 
And, even if he is not saying anything, telling you to take your time, you can read in his eyes the fears and worries, you can feel the pressure and the lack of time: this mission had to be a priority. It comes before your basic needs, eating and sleeping becoming optional. You hadn't seen anyone else other than the pictures of the victims' bodies for the last weeks, talked so little that you are almost sure you lost your voice.
You were in distress and it's obvious that your state of mind has led to mistakes you could've easily avoided, even a rookie wouldn't have made them. 
Before you could realize, it was the morning, and the sun didn't come alone: it left a surprise on your desk, an umpteenth death. You didn't wait long, immediately going to the place where it happened, in hope you would find something if you are the first one here. But, as always, everything is clean, the appartment being perfectly tidy, except for the cold body in the middle of the living-room.
They are playing with your mind, probably amused to see you trying to stop them, knowing that you can't because it's impossible to catch a shadow. People are dying and there is nothing you can do about it.
Those thoughts are unbearable, and you are fighting the urge to break an object when you notice something. It is almost invisible, so small that you almost missed it. It is just a piece of paper, stucked between two tiles on the balcony. 
Here it is, your hint, the first one since you started. If you are exhausted, it seems that the person you are chasing starts to feel confident enough to let their guard down and make mistakes. There is not much in the paper, just bits of words but it is enough for you to guess everything you need: their next victim.
You know that there is only a small chance that you could actually stop them tonight, but you can't help the feeling of hope that is growing inside of you because, for the first time, you've the feeling that you are getting somewhere.
You should've told Fury. You should've let him know what you found, your leads, where you are going tonight, but you didn't. Even if you know how dangerous going in there alone and unprepared, you did it, the feeling of hope giving you the impression that nothing could go wrong - you would deal later with Fury's anger. 
If you get out of here alive. 
But it may be your only chance to get them, because who knows when they're gonna make another mistake? It could be weeks or months, maybe never, and you don't have the strenght to wait for so long. You don't even really care about the target, he is just some rich man who embodies everything you hate, it's just that this mission is now personnal: you're done playing their game and want to let them know.
You are driving fast, not caring about the speed limits. Gladly, it is late and the hotel is on the edge of the city, isolated to provide traquility to the people that decide to stay here - all rich and influential. You weren't surprised when you discovered that the next victim was staying here for a few days. 
But, if the road is empty, your mind isn't. Your heart is racing, trying to get out of your chest. In months of research, you've never been so close to success, it has something exciting. However, hope doesn't come alone. This feeling is accompanied by nervousness and nausea as you can't help but think of all the ways this could go wrong, the so-good idea is just sounding like a really bad mistake now.
You're on your own, no one knows you are here tonight.
Your fingers are tapping against the steering wheel in an attempt to shut out these thoughts, but it doesn't change anything. You know that, if you want everything to go fine, you need to keep your mind clear - no one ever successed a mission while being distracted, it would only get you killed. However, it is easier to say than to do.
You found yourself waiting at the front of the hotel, trying to hide how shaky your hands were. Even if you are wearing the most expensive dress of your dressing, you are still feeling out of place, everything here being just ... too much, honestly.
One glance at the entrance confirmed what you thought: going in won't be easy. It's obvious that you can't walk in here, pretending to be some guest, without being suspicious. In this kind of mission, discretion is the key and you need to become a part of the landscape.
"Can I steal a bit of your time?" a man asked after you waited for a few minutes. 
A pretty woman doesn't go unotice in that kind of space, especially if she looks a bit lost. This man, however, has nothing pretty, he is probably older than your parents. You are not dumb, knowing that there is nothing innocent behind his request, and this simple thought is enough to digust you. Yet, you don’t say anything. You are just hiding your feelings behind a smile, nodding slowly to him.
He is your way inside.
Once you are inside, you don't wait for one more minute before excusing yourself, pretending you have to go to the bathroom. He made some jokes about women that you don't bother to listen to, already far away, knowing that you won't keep your promise to come back as quickly as possible.
The feeling his hand left on your waist makes you shiver, but you don't have much time to think about it, trying to discretly shaking it off as you are heading to the stairs. At least, the first part of your plan - which wasn't really one - was done: you are inside of the building.
From the hotel's roof, you have a perfect look at the city. Sadly, you don't have much time to enjoy the view of the city lights or to observe the movements of the citizens, unawere of what's happening so close to them. The cold wind of autumn is brushing your face, a few of your hair strubbornly getting out of your braids to get in your eyes, and the fresh air is easing your nervousness a bit. 
But it all came back in a second, all it took was a glance at your watch: almost ten pm, you only have a few minutes to decide what to do. 
Before going down, you made sure that the living-room was empty, using a small drone. You scoffed when you saw the suit he reserved, it was bigger than your appartment and every object there seems to be outrageously expensive. However, even if you can't see anyone, you are not letting your guard down. The lights are on, which means he is somewhere in the appartment and it doesn't let you a lot of time to sneak in if you don't want to be seen.
You went in by the window. Your hands were shaking as you tried to open it, and you couldn't help but glance inside from time to time, fearing the assassin would show. The stress you were feeling made you less efficient and you had to try three times before you eventually hear the relieving sound of the window unlocking - usually, you wouldn't need more than one attempt to get there.
You were trying to make as little noise as possible while closing the window behind you, to make it seem like you've never been here, when you are surprised by a presence on your back. You barely dodged the lamp he threw at you, the object hitting the floor, breaking in a loud noise - for the discretion, you may want to try harder next time. 
As his scream is piercing throught your ears, you jump at him, one of your hands keeping his mouth shut while you are holding him against the wall, hoping no one hears him - because, if it's the case, the assassin won't be your only problem. This was your second mistake, one you could've easily avoided if you came with a better plan than "going in and taking the target down". Even if you are here to save him, the fact that he knows may jeopardize the whole mission, the assassin will probably notice that something isn't right. 
"No, no, no! Don't yell," you hushed him, "I am here to save you, the assassin is coming for you, tonight," you told him in an attempt to ease his panic; but how could you sucess to calm him down when you are even more stressed than he is? His panic is slowly becoming yours as you realise how badly you’ve screwed up.
"To.. save me?" he asked and, at the way he told those words, you can tell that he is schocked by the news. 
"Yes, they-," you started to reply, sliping your hand in your pocket to get out your badge. It seems to calm him down and you can eventually take a few steps back, releasing the man, but your movements are slow, ready to throw yourself at him again if he decides to scream. 
You were already looking around, in search of any hint the assassiin would already be here when you heard a cold chuckle that made you shiver. You immediately turn to the man, only to notice that he is the one laughing. 
"Oh, but I am not the one that needs to be saved," he said, smiling, and you immediately froze, unable to move an inch as your mind is trying to process what he just said. 
"What?" you replied, but deep down you already knew what was happening, the feeling that something isn't right only growing stronger.
"Oh, sorry...", another voice said on your back. Its tone is false pity, its chuckle was full of arrogance, "have I ruined your little moment of heroism?" she asked, and you don't need to hear more than those few sentences to recognize the person to whom that voice belongs. 
Slowly, as if you are scared that moving too fast could make her disappear, you turn around to give a look at the woman. Her face is hidden behind a black mask, but you would recognize those eyes everywhere, even if they are now tinged with a darkness you've never seen in her before. Her green eyes no longer had the soft look you were used to. 
"'Tasha? Is that.. you?" you whispered, but you already knew the answer - a few strands of red hair slipping out of her mask, an another hint of her identity. 
This encouter is leaving a weird feeling, twisting your stomach with fear while confusion coulds your throughts; nothing that is happening now makes sense. Why is she here? What does she mean by that? Why is she so different from the person you know? You are feeling like you are facing a ghost, how weird it's stand in front of a person that looks and sounds like your old friend but that is nothing like them at the same time.
"I thought I taught you better than that..," she added, but her tone is bothering you: it's harsh, cold, she has never talked to you that way in the past. 
It's when she eventually takes her mask off that you can see that she has been smirking the whole time, enjoying the situation you are in. However, you are not smiling at all, because you slowly realise that is was just a trap, *and you fell right into it, giving yourself to the person you've chased for months.*
“Look at you,” she spat out, “so .. naive, and stupid, you didn’t change, uh? You didn’t learn your lesson?” she asked, and you couldn't find the words to reply, the shock had stolen your voice, you didn’t even notice that the man left the room, leaving only the two of you and a thick ambience.
You’ve known the woman for many years. When you joined the Avengers, the two of you quickly became close as being the only two women in a team of cocky men. Sure, it wasn’t always easy because of how different you are, but you learned a lot by her side and you appreciated her a lot, always seeking the company of the spy.
A few years ago, when everyone decided it was time to split up, you didn’t stay in touch with any of them. You were never a family, despite what they would tell you, just colleagues and, if it was hard to admit at first, you eventually got used to this idea. However, you can’t help but think about the redhead from time to time, regretting not having a way to contact her, wishing you would've at least stayed close with her among all your former teammates. 
You thought it was mutual, but you are not sure anymore. 
No matter how hard she tried to be nice to you, a part of her always hated the person you were. She hated your smile and how pure it was, she hated how childish you could be, always excited over the smallest things. You were a constant reminder of what her life could've been if she had a normal childhood. She was jealous. It felt unfair to see that life gave you everything she always dreamed of. 
But the spy never talked about it. She listened closely everytime you would talk about your childhood, helping you to organize surprises for your family, not mentionning the way her stomach would twist and her heart hurt in those moments. She got used to the feeling of her nails digging into her skin whenever she was having a conversation with you - because you would most likely be talking about your memories at some point. 
She even used to avoid your room, not wanting to see the pictures and childhood memories displayed everywhere. Those objects were a reminder that your family is real when hers was nothing more than a pretending, a mission. While she was trying to survive, you never got to worry about anything else than what was your favourite colour. 
And, even if she knows you had your own struggles, she couldn’t help but have the toxic urge to compare both of your lives and what you have been through.
You got the life she was dreaming of with the other girls, but you didn't even seem to realise it.
If she was able to keep up the act, it was only because it was easy to go on missions by your side. You were skilled but, most importantly, great at following orders: you would always do everything she asked you to. You were eager to please the woman. So she talked to you, smiled, acted nice, pretended it was nothing when you would apologize for ranting about your life, knowing that, one day, she would find a way to get her revenge.
Suddenly, you are the one being pinned against the wall and she leaves you no chance to escape. You barely noticed her moving, barely had time to think about dodging her attack that you were already in her hands.  
She appears to be even better than when you were working together, and you suspect that it's not because she trained since, but surely because she never used her whole skills in a fight against you - she knew she didn't need that to win. Your hopes of beating the redhead vanish immediately, you only ever won because she let you to.
How could you?
She was raised to kill, when you would just achieve a childhood dream.
Oh, you are good at it, just not good enough. You realize your mistake when, for the first time since you met the spy, you feel her fist landing on your face with its whole strenght, not once, but an endless amont of time. There is blood, yours, running down your nose and mouth, and it comes with a sharp pain as her last hit sends you to the ground. 
“You’ve no idea for how long I’ve waited for that moment..," she told you while coming closer. She is observing your miserable form with a satisfied smile on her face. 
“Tasha’, I understand that-,” you tried to say, but you were stopped by another kick on your face that took your breath away. She doesn't even let you the possibility to say a few words, the sound of your voice being enough to drive her crazy. 
The pity in it is making her sick.
“You can understand?” she scoffed in disbelief. She can't believe that you've the audacity to say something like that. “No. You think you can understand what I am going through, but you can’t, and you want to know why?" she asked, pausing before giving you the answer herself, "because you are the golden child that has everything in the palm of her hand," she said those words in a voice full of hate. 
“What happened..?" you whispered, "that- that’s not.. you... not the Natasha I know," you said, trying to make sense of the situation, but you can't, you want to believe that it is just a terrible mistake, that she is still here, somewhere, that she just got lost - but it could've happened to any of you, right?
“Oh, but you never knew me, love," she replied, coldly laughing at you, "This is me. This is the person I was born to be. For years, I tried to run away, but we can’t escape our destiny," she continued. She takes a few more steps toward you, kneeling at your side, her hand caressing your cheek, "and honestly, I've never felt so good, so free."
“If it’s him again, I- I can help you, we can find a-," you said, refusing to think about the fact that, maybe, she is right, that everything is just her choice, because it would make you the enemy of a person that used to be your friend and teammate. 
Again, you are stopped by a kick on your chest while she is smiling, as if you just said the stupidest thing she's ever heard of her life.
“Him?” she chuckled, “Oh, honey, no.. he is long gone. It is just me now. I eventually got to be who I really am without anyone to prevent me from doing so, isn’t it .. thrilling?” she asked, but you are not sharing her excitement, you are just frightened and she can tell it by the way you are looking at her, your eyes being wide open. 
She was born for that life, she was raised with the only purpose to kill, to spy, but since the Avengers no longer exist, what was she? Her skills were no longer useful. At first, she tried to get a normal job, but it didn't end very well, she just couldn't fit in. She hated the feeling of having everything to learn again.
And it was all your fault.
You were the voice in her head that made her believe it was possible, that she could, one day, have a normal life, without blood and fights. You are the one that gave her hope. When she was at your side, she always felt like you were right, but reality was quick to kick in and, whenever the two of you were talking, there was always a small detail that would remind her that you are living in two opposite worlds. The demons that haunted her spared you and she will never be able to make it up for the blood on her hands.
But then you abandoned her, like the others, and she realized she couldn't do it without you to show her the beauty of the world. It just seems impossible, she was too brutal for the earth. 
And she started hating you for your lies. 
You never knew, but she was watching you the whole time. She knows every detail of your life, how you succeeded to rebuild it after the Avengers when she failed. It seems so simple, so why couldn't she do the same? You seem to have forgotten your former colleagues so easily, you got a new job and friends, a complete new life in only a few months, as if she never existed. Meanwhile, the memories of her time with the Avengers were stuck in her head. 
She felt like she lost her only chance to have a normal life. 
It's not surprising, then, that she fell again in that loop of blood and death. It was familiar, almost comforting, something she is good at. Whenever she completes a mission, it reminds her that she has a place in that world, even if it's not the one she has dreamed of.
She loved to see you struggling. She enjoyed watching you those past months, she wanted to see how desesperate you could get before breaking down. She knew it wasn't healthy, but she couldn't help but love the feeling of power, and it is even more true right now, as she has you pinned against the wall, one of her hands pressed against your throat.
“I know that you think you’re better than me, but we are the same, we are both killers," she said, her face being so close to yours that you could feel her breath. "The difference is that you are controlled by your superiors. They wouldn’t care if I was doing the same, they don’t care about those deaths, they are just afraid they can't control me. And you know what?" she asked with a frightening expression, "they're right to feel that way. Now that I am free, no one will ever tell me what to do, not even you,” she whisepered those last words in your ears, it sounded like a warning. 
In reality, she is only almost free, because she has one last thing to do for it to be true. Even if she is now at the head of her own organization, no longer taking orders from anyone else, she doesn't feel completely free yet. This time, it is not because of Dreykov, Fury or Tony, but you. 
The redhead firmly believes that, if she manages to control you, she will be able to get the freedom she always wanted. 
Slowly, her gentle touch becomes agressive, her fingers are no longer caressing your cheek, they are wrapped around your throat, the pressure slowly increasing until you are struggling to breath. You can read everything she never told you in her eyes: suffering and despair, hatred and anger. 
You are the last thing with power over her. She can't get you out of her mind, being obsessed with you in a way that isn't healthy. She can't stop thinking about the sweet words you used to whisper to her when she was at her lowest, the ones that gave her a glimpse of who she could've been, but also the ones that prevent her from embracing who she really is.
If she wants to be free, she needs to grief the person she would've been if her childhood would've been like yours, and it won't be possible as long as you're here. Your words were the cause of the guilt that was building in her sometimes, when it was late, they were keeping her from sleeping, they are the reason for all her weaknesses.
"P- please," you whispered, managing to say a few words, begging for your life as she coldly held her knife above your head - you don't doubt one second she would kill you without any hesitation.
But the hit never came.
She just stayed like that for what felt like hours, tilting her head while a smile spread on her face, almost mocking. The smile has nothing in common with what you're used to, this one sends shivers through your body.
"Hm, you're right," she eventually said, as if you said something that would've been enough for her to change her mind when you didn't - she seems to be talking to herself. "Where would be the fun if I kill you know? It was just starting to get interesting, don't you think?" she added and your relief is short, there is something mischevious on her tone and attitude that makes you wish she just've killed you instead. 
Those past months made her realize that she doesn't need to kill you, she doesn't even really want to. No, what she really enjoyed was more the idea of having control over your life, to know that you were so desesperate that she was the only thing in her mind - and you didn't even know yet it was her behind that. 
Now that you know, it'll only make it worse.
If she wouldn't hesitate to stab you, she knows that you would. After so many years of working with you, she had time to get to know you, and she was right thinking you didn't change, still being so predictable. She barely had to do anything to have you between her hands, you fell almost on her trap so easily that it was almost disappointing.
You are doing everything she guesses you will.
And she knows you won't kill her, *how could you?* You strongly believe in redemption and that, even if Natasha got lost, you can take her back, no matter how long it'll take. Everyone deserves a second chance. 
The redhead thought it would be entertaining to see you try to "save her" and miserably fail before she ends your life. This is the revenge she was looking for. 
"I'll leave you a little something to remember who you are dealing with," she murmurs as she lowers the knife, directing it toward your hips where she stabs you. She knows exactly what she is doing, to within a few millimeters, she would've killed you but she didn't. "See you soon," she added, and they're the last words she pronounces as she leaves the room. 
It is a reminder of the power she has. She leaves you on the ground, alone and bleeding like an animal while she has no injuries. And, if this encounter ended up that way, it is only because she decided to, not because she had pity, nor because you decided to. She could've killed you in a second if she wanted to, and god, she loves that feeling.
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