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theoriginalcarnivorousmuffin · 3 years

Note

After reading your opinion on Molly Weasley, i want to know: What are you're opinions on the Weasley family? Besides Ron & Molly that is.

Five characters? In one post? Well, alright, here we go.

The Weasleys as a Whole

I’ve mentioned this before but JKR writes the Weasleys to clearly be a believable but ideal family. They’re all fiercely loyal, progressive per wizarding world standards, love each other and Harry deeply, and have this wonderful off-kilter joyous house where there’s always some rambunctious thing going on.

Harry comes to associate the Weasleys with family and, personally, I believe a large part of him marrying Ginny boils down to it will make him a Weasley for real.

That said, they’ve got some major issues. They’re very righteous people who, as a whole, will ice you out the moment they even suspect you do something that disagrees with them. You don’t even have to do it, what you did or didn’t do doesn’t even have to be something terrible or something bad, but god help you if the family decides they’re done with you.

They’re very resentful of people like the Malfoys. This isn’t just because Lucius is a smarmy, pompous, ass (he is) or that he indirectly almost murdered Ginny but seems to mostly be because Lucius has so much money. All of their interactions seem to boil down to the money. More than this though, the Weasleys seem fully supportive of laws that... well, used against themselves would be a travesty but used against the likes of the Malfoys it’s about damn time.

They’re unquestioningly loyal to Dumbledore. Granted, most people we see in canon are, Dumbledore’s very very very good at convincing people he’s a saint. However, these guys are practically his cult member to the point where they do things like refuse to have Harry over the summer, even before Voldemort returned, because Dumbledore told them not to.

They also never really adopt Harry into the family. Oh they give him a nice sweater, he comes over every once in a while to the house, he’s very good friends with Ron but he’s mostly treated just like that, a good friend. Now, there’s nothing wrong with this, except the way JKR sets it up we’re supposed to believe this is the family Harry found. It’s just that the family Harry’s found let’s him stay in a house with bars on his window where twelve-year-old Ron tells them, “Harry’s muggle family is really really awful” in a way that should have been raising red flags. Hermione practically lives at the Weasleys, Harry never does.

Now, are the Weasleys evil? No, far from it, they’re ordinary people who act in ways I’d expect ordinary people too. Technically they didn’t have to do anything more for Harry than they did, they didn’t have to hate Lucius Malfoy for better reasons, and they don’t have to be even slightly less worshipful of Dumbledore. They’re people, and they’re fine characters, but the overwhelming worship and love of the Weasleys we see across fandom does get on my nerves.

But you asked for individuals, so here we go.

Arthur Weasley

Arthur is the epitome of “Pretty Fly for a White Guy” in the worst of ways and is, frankly, a giant awful joke to me. He’s the white kid you see going around with dread locks, a beanie the color of the Jamaican flag, smoking weed, and attempting to speak like Bob Marley

Only, because he does it with muggle things, we’re supposed to find him funny and progressive.

Arthur is absolutely, albeit unwittingly, condescending in his love of muggle knickknacks. He has no idea how any of it actually works, not limited to how muggles could possible survive without the gold standard, but ardently believes he does because he can enchant the car to fly. Seriously, that he believes he’s an expert on muggle culture, as a pureblood wizard who heads an office in the ministry on it, is the worst part. His love of toasters comes across as, “Wow, look how cool it is that these poor little muggles made all this neat stuff. We should absolutely love the muggles because of it!” And that he heads an office in the ministry called “The Misuse of Muggle Artifacts” which is all about catching down Jackass style pranksters who think it would be hilarious of they enchanted toasters to bludgeon muggles to death...

Goddammit Arthur, why do you exist?

Right, otherwise, he’s got some pride issues going on. Part of the reason Percy is excommunicated is not so much that Percy doesn’t believe Harry, but because Percy dared to do better than Arthur in his own career. Arthur is stuck in his position as head of a joke of a department, he is an underling at its finest, and frankly likely only has that position because he’s a pureblood and the idea of putting a halfblood or even muggleborn at the head of a department dealing with muggles just made the higher ups shudder. (Don’t tell Arthur that though, he likes to think he’s not benefitting from nepotism).

Arthur goes so far to accuse Percy as Fudge’s secretary as spying on him. Arthur, the guy who heads “Misuse of Muggle Artifacts”. Yeah, Arthur, I’m sure Fudge is really wasting his time using his straight laced secretary to find out all your dirty secrets.

He also tends to see the world as very black and white. When Skeeter in book 4 writes an article after the Quidditch World Cup disaster complaining about the ministry’s lax security in enabling domestic terrorists to enter (something completely valid and true by the way) Arthur is so personally offended that both he and Percy go straight to the ministry to complain about Rita Skeeter and her daring to assume freedom of speech! HOW DARE SHE CALL THE MINISTRY’S NON-EXISTENT SECURITY AT THE WORLD CUP LAX! (To be fair, she also cited Arthur as having been in attendance at the event, a ministry employee, and having done nothing but, well, this is also true Arthur. You’re in a guerilla, underground, resistance movement. If I didn’t already think the Order was a joke this would kind of highlight it for me).

He’s also very resentful of Lucius Malfoy, and it seems to mostly be about the money. Arthur and Molly have a severe spending problem and actively resent that Lucius is swimming in money. That Arthur is ardently pleased about a law being passed in which the ministry without warrant can ransack Lucius Malfoy’s home...

Well, Arthur, imagine the slippery slope if the government decides that it would like to search the Weasley home without warrant? In fact, he doesn’t even have to imagine it, as the beloved government in a few short years turns against him and then it’s all about how corrupt the ministry is.

Arthur’s delightfully narrowminded, basically, and reminds us at nearly every opportunity.

Percy Weasley

Mostly, I just feel bad for Percy. Percy’s the son/brother that nobody likes and he’s painfully aware of that fact. He doesn’t fit in with the others, he has far too much ambition for the Gryffindor family and they resent him for it, and then he dares to say things like “I don’t know guys, Voldemort resurrecting from the dead after decades doesn’t sound plausible, we know Harry’s a little off kilter, and Dumbledore’s one shady dude”. Percy happens to be wrong about Voldemort resurrecting (and admits as much when the evidence is plainly visible), but he’s pretty on the money with the rest of it.

Regardless, growing up we see Ron constantly hating on Percy along with the rest of the siblings. I’m sure Percy is obnoxious, and certainly full of himself after making prefect and head boy, but he’s very clearly even before Order of the Phoenix the Least Favorite Brother (TM).

Then the Weasley family completely ices him out for a) getting a very high ranking position very quickly as Fudge’s secretary and b) not being gung ho about Dumbledore saying crazy things in the paper. Remember that to Percy Harry is Ron’s weird friend who seems to get into highly illegal activities every other week. From Percy’s point of view, it’s probably a matter of time before Harry becomes a crack head in Knockturn Alley (or given how behind the times wizards tend to be, an opium den).

He’s constantly getting Ron into not only trouble but life threatening situations, is erratic and apparently a parseltongue of all things, and now Harry’s flipped his lid and saying that Voldemort has been resurrected after having gone through a very traumatic experience of watching a classmate somehow die.

While we see Percy kind of (sort of) make up with the family it’s clear that for Percy to have any relation with these people he’s the one who will always, ALWAYS, have to come crawling back on his knees and begging for forgiveness. It’s the Weasley way or the highway and I imagine, at some point probably a little after/during that epilogue, Percy will just slowly drift away because it’s just not worth it anymore.

Percy’s very much the black sheep of the family.

Fred and George Weasley

You all are going to kill me, but I actually don’t care in the slightest about Fred and George Weasley. This is because they basically have no personality aside from “funny”.

They just have their weird, tandem, twin act and are either playing jokes on the school or else serving as Deus ex Machina in giving Harry magical items such as the Marauder’s Map for no apparent reason. The plot told them it was time, I guess.

Their jokes, while not as bad as Sirius and James’ “Let’s sexually harrass Severus Snape by pantsing and beating him at the edge of Hogwarts lake” or Sirius’ “Let’s get Snape eaten by a werewolf!” are still often needlessly cruel and... kind of pointless. They harass Slytherin house constantly just because they happen to be Slytherins, they’re acceptable victims (which of course makes house tension that much worse). Harry gets sent a toilet seat in the hospital because... that’s funny? Har de har?

They’re so indistinguishable from one another I routinely see people mistake which one got his ear chopped off and which one died. Because the point is, that we can’t tell the difference! It doesn’t matter who lived and who died because all we know is that Freorge is dead!

Similarly, you see tons of fics around where character of the day ends up in this weird twincestuous relationship with Fred and George and it’s not only for a) that delightful twincest but b) because they’re such a singular unit that any attempt to pair one with somebody else feels weird. So you just get these porn fics about Fred and George being weird rapey teenagers who seem like they’d be more interested dating each other.

Charlie Weasley

I really have no thoughts on Charlie. He raises dragons in Romania, the family loves him. Now, dragon raising feels like one of the most dangerous jobs in the Harry Potter universe, like Charlie had just gone and signed up to be a lumberjack but he seems to like it?

We really don’t see much of Charlie, he’s just the obligatory older Weasley son so that the Weasleys can be this ridiculously large family.

Bill Weasley

We see slightly more of Bill, but again, not enough to really leave an impression. We know that his marrying Fleur sent Molly into a complete state, and that they’re going to have awkward Christmas dinners forever because of it where Fleur just sits there and pretends not to loathe every second of Molly’s presence while Molly notes how bad it is that Victoire got stuck with that ugly pink hair instead of the Weasley red.

Bill doesn’t seem to really do anything about this. He still marries Fleur, but we don’t really see a major confrontation where he tells the family “Look, I’m marrying her, so grow up.” So, I imagine he just tries to smile pleasantly and tells Fleur to just endure it for another few hours. He loves his family, his family’s great, but they only have to see Fleur once a year at Christmas.

Ginny Weasley

Ginny is weird. She’s this weird, frankly, almost personality-less void whose sole obsession in life seems to be marrying Harry. She and Harry end up in the world’s weirdest relationship and I honestly have no idea how people ship it other than canon told them to.

Ginny’s... well, first off, she’s very much in love with an idea. She had always worshipped Harry Potter but then he personally saves her life in what was a horrifically traumatic year and so that feeling just grows even more. Despite being Ron’s sister, she barely seems to know Harry, and everything she seems to like about it are just things she made up.

I imagine her and Harry’s marriage will be littered with affairs on her end. Not divorce though, because Harry would never admit his wife is having affairs on him all the time even if someone directly confronted him. Harry also won’t admit he’s gay.

More than though we get hints of a personality. Ginny’s a fiery red-head tomboy with a temper. But... Well, it’s only ever hints. She never felt like a real person to me. She has I think one throwaway line about the Chamber of Secrets incident and how it personally affected her. We’re told she’s great at the bat boogey hex so we know she’s a fiery independent woman.

She feels more like a character sheet than an actual person.

Whenever she’s around I always had this nagging question in my head where I ask why Ginny’s here. She has a lot of potential but nothing’s ever done with her. And when something is, it’s to get her into this bizarre relationship with Harry where he imagines there’s a green rage monster in his chest that loves her skin.

Okay Harry, if you say so.

TL;DR: The Weasleys aren’t evil or anything, I’m not on Team Bash Them All, but they are shortsighted, ordinary, people who don’t deserve to be worshipped as all that is good in this world.

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sup-hoes-its-me · 3 years

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To Be So Lonely (Gaara x Reader)

A/N: my first ever attempt at a gaara one shot. Essentially, you are permanently disabled due to an accident involving evil jinchuriki gaara, but you never gave up on him. friends to lovers. dramatic confessions. gaara is just so pure and sweet, he deserves all the love and more. perfect baby boy. precious.

ps. this was a very quick write. there may be mistakes, idk. just hopefully someone enjoys.

Word count: 3600 (soo short lmao)

The pair of them walked the aisles of the bakery. He adored how her eyes grew wide when they landed on a particularly shiny loaf of bread or a decadent chocolate cake that she couldn’t help but gush over. Today, after work since it seemed he had a break, he decided he would go with her to the dessert shop she’d been begging him to go visit.

He watched as she hobbled forward on her crutches, leaning some of her weight on walls or tables when she got the chance. He felt genuinely awful. It was his fault she was in that position after all. Nearly ten years ago when she enveloped her in his sand and crushed her leg brutally. He was so lost and hopeless back then, and a mere sparring match was enough to set him off and permanently injure the woman.

He felt like the worst man alive as he watched her walk around, and he followed on soft feet behind her. They were friends. It seemed that even after all he had done, she still cared about him. She walked up to his office the day he became Kazekage, and asked to be his assistant. He couldn’t say no, not with the way she smiled so beautifully at him with those soft lips and sparkling eyes.

Admittedly, he wanted her to be at his side.

She often sat with him in his office when there wasn’t anything too urgent going on, her legs tucked under her and her crutches leant against his desk. She would tell him stories about her day or things that she found funny, and he would listen intently to each word. He adored her voice. It was perfect, the perfect pitch and tone, just enough enthusiasm to blow him away. How she could be so positive when so many things had gone wrong, he wasn’t sure.

He knew that if he asked Naruto, the boy would have the answer for sure. He was so wise with people in that way. After all, Naruto was the reason Gaara was able to change into the man he was today, the man that had Y/N laughing and giggling in the evenings before she went home.

Y/N’s smile was so bright. It practically glowed when she entered the room. He wanted to bottle it up and keep it forever, that is how much he admired her enthusiasm. He couldn’t imagine the pain she went through, and the struggle she goes through daily. He couldn’t imagine the strength she must have to work for him and maintain that attitude that he admired so deeply.

She was so beautiful. He found himself waking up multiple times in the morning with her still on his mind, her eyes and her smile and the way her hair fell around her face. He found himself so lost in the mere thought of the woman, he thought he might be going crazy.

He’d asked his siblings about the situation, on separate occasions, just gauging what two more adjusted people thought of the situation. Each time, they laughed, and told him he simply had a crush on his closest assistant. His sister told him to act on his feelings before she was swept away by some other man from the village. His brother told him she was quite a catch, and he would be lucky if she liked him back. He thought she was only kind to him because he was her boss, essentially. Needless to say, that was a bit rough for Gaara to hear.

He wasn’t sure what he would do if Y/N shared his feelings. She certainly was kind, and the woman he wanted to be with, but he just couldn’t be with her, not after everything he had done. He couldn’t imagine her ever caring for him like that after he took away a huge portion of her mobility. He stole away from her the ability to become a shinobi like she always wanted. He felt like a monster.

There was no way in good conscience, he could accept her affections and burden her with his own. She was too perfect. He wouldn’t ruin her in that way. He couldn’t.

And so he was content just following her around, buying her little goodies here and there to make her happy just one more time before he had to see her off for the night. No doubt, he would dream about her once again tonight, after spending so much time staring into her eyes and hearing her melodic laugh. Sometimes, he found himself looking forward to those nights where she would plague his mind. He could truly be himself in those dreams without any constraint, without an ounce of guilt. He could love her during those nights, and he found himself longing for more and more each day.

She spun around in front of the final glass case in the near empty bakery, and she pointed to some fruit tarts in a little box.

“You want those?”

“Yes, please.”

He pointed them out to the staff, and they bagged them up and slid them across the counter. He got a discount as the Kazekage, and he was more than willing to buy a few things for her. It was the least he could do. Even though he paid her a decent amount for her work, he still felt generous. He liked seeing the way her eyes lit up and her ears perked up with happiness each time he bought her a simple cake or tart. It was so cheap and simple, he felt like he was robbing her. He got so much enjoyment out of seeing her beauty over and over again and all she got was a little dollar dessert.

They walked out of the store, and she sighed, reaching into the bag and taking out the little box. She pulled out the cake and took a quick bite, sighing loudly at the flavor. “Wow, Gaara, this is one of the best ones yet. Try it,” she held out the other side to him.

“No, I’m okay. I’m sure it’s great.”

“Oh, come on.”

He sighed, and took the tart from her hands, taking the tiniest bite from the side opposite of hers. She was right. It was really good. He nodded, his lips curving into a tiny smile as she grinned, giving him a thumbs up. “See, I told you it was really good. I don’t go around picking out crappy sweets.”

“Here, eat the rest. You haven’t had a chance to eat today, have you?” he asked, urging her to take the tart back. She did, and nodded. “You really can’t be doing that, Y/N. It’s not healthy to skip meals like that.”

“I know. I normally don’t but during my lunch break today, I was busy talking to your brother and I lost track of time.”

“So it was Kankuro’s doing? Of course.”

“Oh, jeez. It’s not a big deal. My parents are going to the market today so they’ll no doubt be home with some food for me to eat for dinner. Plus, you got me these awesome tarts for dessert.”

He nodded, a hum leaving his lips. “Still, I’d like if maybe you started eating lunch with me, just so I can make sure you’re getting proper nutrition.”

Her eyes widened, and she began to smile once again. She felt her cheeks begin to heat up from his offer. How could he so casually say something like that? He was never one to really think through the things he said, just saying exactly what was on his mind. “Are you asking me on a lunch date?”

“What?! No-that’s not what I meant,” he blurted out, his own cheeks turning red under her stare. “I just meant it as a friend thing.”

She averted her eyes back down to her dessert, and she took another bite. After giving him a moment of time to cool down, and after she’d swallowed, she replied giddily, knowing it would stir him up once again, “Alright, well, I wouldn’t mind if it was a date thing, just saying.”

He was now nearly as red as his hair, and she burst out laughing. “What?! Y/N, don’t laugh at me!”

“Okay, Kazekage-sama.”

He huffed as he tried to calm down, following as she started off once again to her home. On days like this one, he would walk her home from wherever they had gone, and in turn, he said it was a way for him to see the village. In reality, he had seen the village more than enough time to count, he really just wanted to walk with her home, to feel like he was doing something for her by providing company on the short journey through the streets.

As they approached her home, he knew that this was going to be the end of their outing and he would have to leave her once again. He really enjoyed their time together. It was the only part of the day he looked forward to most of the time, and to see her go always filled his heart with a bit of sadness. It was unreasonable to want anymore time out of her day to himself, but he couldn’t help but want it.

She opened her front door and stepped inside, holding the door open so she could see him standing at the edge of the walkway to her family home. He shifted awkwardly under her stare, one that was absent of a smile and that familiar glimmer in her eye. Things felt serious all the sudden, and it made him nervous.

What had changed all of the sudden? He never expected her next words. They hit him in the chest like a stone, and knocked the air from his chest.

“Gaara, I think I’m in love with you,” Y/N called to the boy standing in her doorway. One outing after another, she found it harder and harder to maintain a neutral guise around him. Y/N really liked him. He was strong. He was a hero. He was a beautifully kind creature whom everyone came to adore.

He stood there in shock, his eyes wide and lips just agape. He wanted her to take back what she’d just proclaimed. He couldn’t accept it. Not when her crutches were right in his view, and her leg was missing right below the knee. He couldn’t handle that confession. Not now, not ever.

It was all his fault.

He turned his head away to the street and sighed, shutting his eyes tightly. “Y/N, I’m sorry.”

“Sorry for what?” she asked, fiddling with the bag of groceries in her hands. It took a lot of nerve to confess to him. It takes a lot to go out and profess your love to the Kazekage and the famous Gaara of the sand. He was a celebrity, practically. He wasn’t simply a childhood friend. She was rightfully nervous.

“I’m sorry you feel that way about someone like me.”

“Gaara, stop. Please. What happened, it’s over now. You’ll never be that same person again.”

He grit his teeth, another sigh coming from behind his teeth. “I cannot accept your confession. I’m sorry, but I have to go now. Please, keep this between us, alright?”

It seemed that the end of their rope was near. He had said what he wanted to say, or what he felt needed to be said. He cared for her, he’d cared for her since he could really remember. She was always kind to him, so beautiful and sweet and generous. Y/N was forever forgiving, and he knew that. He was fully aware that she’d forgiven him for what he’d done to her when he was lost in violence all those years ago. He just couldn’t forgive himself. He was forgiving of those who had wronged him, but to give mercy to the person who brutalized the one woman who’d shown him kindness from the beginning, he just couldn’t bear it.

Gaara was a lonely man. He would always be a lonely man, surrounded by people but always just far enough to protect them. He couldn’t let someone like her become close again and risk something else happening. Even if he was non violent now, what’s to say someone else wouldn’t have a grudge against him and target her?

It was all too overwhelming.

“You can’t deny it, Gaara, you love me too,” she called back to him, quiet enough not to disturb the neighbors but loud enough that it rang out in his chest like a gong, echoing there for a minute. She continued softly, “You can’t just pretend there’s nothing between us just because something happened almost a decade ago. You can’t abandon me, not after everything we’ve been through.”

“Y/N, it’s not that easy.”

“It really is that easy. If you care about me, and I care about you, then that’s all that matters. Forget about my leg, please. I’m over it. I’ve grown used to it, so much it’s not a problem,” she explained, “In fact, you treating me like I’m some injured lamb is the real problem. I’m a strong woman. This injury is nothing when it comes to my sheer force of will.”

He felt terrible, really, he felt like every move he made was the wrong one. He felt like he’d travelled down all the wrong paths with this woman, and she still loved him. Despite everything, she loved him without fault. He was her best friend. The friend who stole her leg from her so young. He was beyond conflicted.

His eyes flickered around the street, and she could feel his paranoia. It would be quite scandalous if someone caught them out here talking about something as personal as this. He was the Kazekage after all, whether he was experiencing normal 22 year old emotions or not.

Y/N grabbed his hand and tugged him quickly into her home. Her parents were gone for the day to the shops, so they weren’t there to intervene, not that they would be too pleased to see their daughter with the red haired boy. Yes, they were proud to have him as their Kazekage, standing strong and tall for the nation. But the injuries he had inflicted on their daughter were a bit too severe to ever completely forgive him. They could never give Gaara their blessing, nor did they truly approve of their friendship. Y/N and Gaara knew this. It only caused his guilt to hang heavier in his chest.

She shut the door behind him, and sighed as she leant her shoulder against the wall, a bit of pressure taken off her sole leg and her arms propped up on the sticks.

“Gaara, how do you feel about me? Really?” she asked.

He wanted to say nothing, to just turn away and pretend he hadn’t heard the question. But he knew that wasn’t an option. He would tell her everything. “I enjoy your company, more than I care to admit. You are so beautiful and kind, I always want you around, especially when work gets rough.”

Y/n stood silent as she let him keep going, to get what he was feeling off his chest. There wasn’t really an outlet in his life to get out all these pent up emotions. He could use a shoulder to lean on sometimes, just as much as anyone else.

“You’re right,” he groaned, “I love you.”

A soft breath caught in her chest at his words. It was true that she had a feeling he felt that way for her, but it was a different thing to hear his words reach her ears. His breathy, raspy voice and the exasperation carried in his tone. The way his eyes refused to meet hers he was so afraid. She felt a shiver run up her spine, and she had to take a deep breath to calm herself down. “Then what’s the point in fighting it?”

“It’s wrong. What I did to you, you’ll never be the same again and it’s all my fault. I don’t know if I could bring myself to look at you everyday knowing that I hurt you so badly. Back then, I didn’t even have remorse. I-I…”

“It’s okay! You’ve changed, time and time again, you’ve shown me that you’re not the same man you used to be. You are so brave and caring and considerate. You care about me and all the other villagers. You changed, and I love the man you’ve become.”

“Does that mean you can forgive me for what I’ve done?”

“I would forgive you a thousand times over.”

“Y/N…”

“You’re the man of my dreams. Please, don’t deprive me of that.”

When his eyes met hers, he wanted to melt away in her arms. She really didn’t care about what he had done, she just wanted him for who he worked so hard to become, the man that Naruto pushed him to be. She raised his arms, and found himself walking right into them. Her head hit his shoulder, and he let out a long shaky breath. “I love you, Y/N.”

“I love you, too, Gaara. I truly do.”

And when she pressed her lips to his, he found himself falling deeper in love with her. She was so soft and gentle in his arms, against his skin, flush and warm like he’d always imagined. He never really expected himself to find someone, not after all he’d done and the man he made himself out to be. He never imagined the kiss of a person on his lips, or the feeling of someone’s arms wound around his body. He only imagined pain.

Yet, here she was. The most forgiving angel in the entire world.

“Y/N L/N, what the hell is this? Dammit, can’t you do this somewhere else, you foolish girl?” a voice called through the door, and when they peered between the curtains, the sight of her mother and father walking up the path to the front door, grocery bags piled in their arms. Her mother’s face was quite red, a small smile gracing her mouth, while her father was another story. Completely exhausted with everything.

Gaara pulled away quickly, his head ducking down so his eyes only met the floorboards. He was Kazekage, why was he so afraid of some old man and his paper sack full of rice? He wasn’t completely sure. All he knew was that Y/N stood there with that beautiful smile, her cheeks puffing out from embarrassment. “It’s okay. They aren’t angry. You might want to head on back home, though.”

The elderly couple opened the door, and he found himself face to face with her mother who smiled, corners of her eyes crinkling. “It’s about time, you sweet boy.”

Her father roared, feeling himself growing hotter with every second that passed. “About time for what, Rise? This man to come in here and violate our daughter-”

“Shush, dad. It was all me this time,” Y/N piped up from the back, which only fueled the fire.

“Of course! You’ve always been so promiscuous, Y/N. How could I expect any less?” he rolled his eyes. “And about you, Kazekage boy.”

“Be gentle, Tanaka.”

“Instead of hurting my daughter, I expect you to protect her as if your life depended on it, you hear me? I won’t have someone coming into my house and hurting my children,” he demanded, and Gaara could only nod. He had never been in a situation quite as terrifying as this one, he had to admit. He felt like he had been caught in the middle of some heinous act, even if it was only kissing the object of his affections. He was more than embarrassed, he thought he might crumble into a million tiny pieces.

He replied, “Of course. I’d never let anything hurt Y/N, sir.”

“That’s what I thought. Now get out of here. You can see your little girlfriend some other time, she has chores.”

“Dad!”

“Enough.”

Gaara nodded to the family of three before opening the door and walking through the threshold. “Goodbye, Gaara!” As he peered back over his shoulder, he was once again stunned by her smiling face, her small hand waving to him as he shut the door behind him. He felt his heart beating faster as he walked down the street back to the Kazekage’s mansion.

Has life always felt this good? He wasn’t too sure. He felt high, like he was floating above the ground with each footstep. Maybe giving the good life, giving Y/N, a chance, was going to work out in his favor. He could feel happiness creeping up his chest and rumbling through his stomach. His cheeks turned red at the thought of his now girlfriend in her home getting scolded by her father, and he couldn’t help but imagine the next day when she would report to his office to pick up paperwork and maybe he could swipe another kiss.

When he walked into his home, he brushed by his brother whose brows perked up upon seeing his expression. “What’s got you looking so whipped, Gaara?”

“It’s nothing, Kankuro.”

“Y/N, right?”

“Maybe.”

His brother's loud laughter rung out in the empty hall. He patted his brother's back with a firm hand, practically congratulating him for getting a girlfriend. It was strange in that way, thinking about it like that. He now had a girlfriend to hug and hold, to keep tightly clasped in his heart for as long as she would allow.

Life was too good. He slept better that night than he had in a long while. All because of this one person who’d wormed their way so easily into his heart.

#gaara x reader #gaara fluff #gaara of the sand #naruto x reader #naruto imagine #gaara imagine #gaara one shot #naruto oneshot #naruto #naruto shippuden #naruto fanfic #gaara fanfic #fanfiction #x reader

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rose-lily-field · 2 years

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I’m really struggling with my faith. I was raised Catholic, but I never really connected with it. I know your intro says you found your faith , can you just kind of explain… how? Like I want to have a close relationship with God but it is so hard. It is so hard to believe. Please help me.

So I was raised atheist my whole life. My parents were raised atheist. Even THINKING about God, religion or anything like that would make me feel physically sick. Not because of any trauma or personal reason, I just hated it. I had a deep hatred for it that I felt could never be cured.

A couple years ago, I got into the cottagecore aesthetic and traditional homemaking and really loved it. I always loved nature and family, always wanted to be a housewife with a dozen children despite being raised in a single parent household with a working mother and just one sibling growing up! With traditional homemaking, quite a lot of people in that community were Christian, so I was exposed to a lot of Christianity that way. It wasn't the Christianity I imagined existed my whole life - no harassment, forcing, wickedness. I would later realise that these things are unbiblical.

I never could find a scientific answer for the beginning of the world and the universe. Nothing made sense. Just where did this "big bang" come from? I started thinking of every single possibility - aliens, a higher race of humans, some higher being - but never God Himself. I was feeling pretty lost in life. I've struggled a lot for a long time and just felt so... Lost. I had seen these wonderful people online, who's views matched me perfectly, yet believed in God. I felt confused as to why they all did, why I didn't. What was different with me?

I always believed in some form of higher power, so one day in my room, I sat down and just asked. "If you are there, please show me you're real. I want to know you're real." and the first thing that came into mind was a number and a name. Now - I had NEVER read the bible in my life, I didn't even know there were different sections (the names), nor a single verse, so there was no way I could have known this. But the numbers and the name? 2911, Jeremiah. These came into my mind and I just was filled with an overwhelming need to see the answer. So I found a bible online and searched it up.

Jeremiah 29:11

"I know the plans I have for you,” announces the Lord. “I want you to enjoy success. I do not plan to harm you. I will give you hope for the years to come.

I broke down. I cried in happiness and hope, for the first time in years. THIS was what I needed. God could have left me to think for myself, or given me any other verse, yet he gave me this one. When I was feeling like I had no goal in life, no dream, no future. When I thought God was wicked, harmful and evil. He gave me THIS. This was the hope for the years to come that I needed. This verse has stuck with me for my entire life now, every time I feel lost, I remember it and the miracle God did.

But that's not the only miracle God has performed! A family member was sick, hadn't eaten in days. Was lethargic, throwing up, very weak. We were worried for the worst. I got down and prayed for him, I asked God to please heal him, or at least stop him from suffering, whatever way is his plan. And the next day? PERFECTLY FINE. No issues, no problems. Eating fine, no more throwing up. There was no explanation of the sudden change, but God's beautiful miracle.

When my father died, when I was a teenager, I had just left the hospital. I didn't get to say goodbye properly, and it ate me up inside for years. I would cry myself to sleep every night about missing him. I just wanted to say goodbye, one last time. I also had never met my grandfather, who had died when my mother was a teenager too. I hadn't even seen a photo of my grandfather before, honestly. I dreamt one night I was in a beautiful meadow. There were many people there, all scattered around and happy. It was the most gorgeous place. My father was there, and so was another man who I just knew was my grandfather, somehow. I got to finally say goodbye to my father, and meet my grandfather. Upon waking, I definitely cried a lot, but it was of happiness and gratefulness to God. I found a photo and the man WAS my grandfather. There was no way I could have dreamt his appearance without seeing him previously.

So these miracles brought me to God, brought me to loving him. I still ask for forgiveness for all the times I hated him and demeaned him as a child. I trust in him no matter what happens. If I lose someone, if something bad happens, I trust him that it is the plan he has made for us.

One little Saint who inspired me was little Saint Sara Mariucci. She was three years old. Her story is truly beautiful! https://newdailycompass.com/en/sara-the-little-saint-who-heals-family-wounds

To keep my faith strong, I keep optimistic. I trust in God's plan for me, for you, and for everyone and everything around us.

Sometimes we have to walk through the thorn bush to reach the meadow.

I would just open your bible, or an app, and read. Start with one of the gospels - Matthew, Mark, Luke & John! It teaches us about Jesus and all HIS miracles, too :) Psalms is also really wonderful, it always cheers me up seeing those songs. I find whenever I'm lost, I pray to God, ask him for guidance and the answer shows up. Sometimes it'll be a phrase or bible verse that pops up in my head, sometimes my eyes will glance to something in the room, or something else! Sometimes the answer won't be instant, or even in a day or a week, but it will always be there :)

I know you're anonymous, but if you ever want to chat, feel free to send me a message! No judgement and it'll all be private. I hope you're well! <3

#storytime #christian #ask

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bondsmagii · 3 years

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omg you read we need to talk about kevin? what did you think? i went through a whole range of emotions, most of them bitter & negative, bc i saw too much of my mum & brother in eva & kevin, something i’m still working through. i started off hating eva bc i projected my resentment towards my mum onto her, but i found myself sympathising with her a bit more towards the end. it’s helped me sympathise a bit with my mum too. this book has probably had the most lasting effect on me than any other!

man, I love that book. I first read it years ago and liked it then, but I recently reread it and I loved it even more. it's such a brilliant book -- profoundly uncomfortable and incredibly bleak, but I think it asks so many important questions that, face it, most people are too scared to even acknowledge. it simultaneously asks the huge taboo of a question -- what if you regret having your child? what if a child is just born bad? -- and also combines it with that other big question: why do kids shoot up their schools? the nature vs nurture debate has been absolutely raging for years regarding children who commit violence at school; as someone with an academic interest in this particular crime, it's one I've banged my head up against multiple times. people seem to always be firmly in one camp: the parents are to blame, or the kid is just evil. nobody seems to consider the interaction between these two things, and how it's always ultimately a choice.

the book is a pretty intense read for me, as I'm sure you can relate. the difference is that while you can see your mother and brother in Eva and Kevin, I actually see myself and my mother in Eva and Kevin. I was an unwanted and a resented child. my parents did not want to have me. I was what my parents referred to as "a surprise", said in the same tone as you would describe a sudden house fire as a surprise, or bad news at work as a surprise. the major difference between my parents and Eva and Franklin was that they had me very young (they would have been 19 and barely 20 when they found out, and 20 and barely 21 when I was born) and this most certainly added to the resentment. my father was always away for work, often getting to go to some pretty interesting destinations; my mother wanted to be the kind of woman who wanted to be a stay-at-home mother, but she hated it. like Eva and Kevin, my mother and I were very, very alike in personality and what we did and did not want out of life, and we were engaged in some level of warfare for my entire childhood. while I wasn't quite on the level of Kevin in terms of blinding my siblings and whatnot, I was quite the terror as a child. by the time I reached my teenage years I was uncontrollable and my parents had given up trying. I could not be punished. I did not care. any punishment they did hand out, I was maliciously compliant to the point of infuriation. I'm sure my parents could argue that I was born evil, and indeed that's what they told the extended family. I admit I was not an easy child. however -- I was a child.

I did not ask to be born, and when my parents made the choice to have me and then resent my existence, that was on them. a child knows. a child can tell when he's not wanted, when he's an inconvenience. I knew it very well, from an early age. my parents' resentment of me resulted in them abusing me right up until I left home. I was like an unwanted pet, except they couldn't dump me off at a shelter. no, they never laid a finger on me physically, so they can claim they didn't abuse me -- but emotionally and psychologically they were abusive, and especially in my teenage years, they neglected me severely. (think along the lines of being left at home alone for extended periods with no food, no money, and no way to get supplies as we lived in rural Ireland and the closest supermarket was 30 minutes away. this was not something they did out of malice, but rather something they did because they did not consider me at all. they forgot my existence, most of the time, or they deemed me so inconsequential that making provisions for me was a task that could be forever put off.) understandably this made me hate them in return, and I took great pleasure in being a little shit. it was all I had. nature vs nurture, which is it? my parents weren't exactly nurturing, and they taught me very bad behaviour -- but at the same time from the moment I was born I had my mother's personality, predisposing me to being a little shit. even now, grown up and after many years of working on myself, I still find myself fighting the urge to be as cruel and as judgemental as she could be; likewise I see those positive qualities she had, that she could have shown more of if she had put the work in like I had. we went from being furious carbon copies of one another to an example of the best and the worst case scenario.

basically what it comes down to is choice. Kevin and I had a similar situation going on, but Kevin chose to try and find what he was looking for in mass murder, and I chose to try and find it by getting out of my house and never returning. I mentioned earlier that I have an academic interest in the kind of crime that Kevin committed; since the age of 17 I have been researching these things, and now have expertise in several specific incidents. I bring this up to illustrate that this crime was on my radar when I was around Kevin's age, when I was suffering from the same problems as he was. thousands of kids find themselves in this position, yet so relatively few commit the act. why? it's choice. nature, nurture -- it doesn't matter. there comes a point where you have to make the choice, and honestly? it's chaos theory, baby.

as well as researching this kind of thing I'm also an amateur meteorologist. I love weather. I love trying to work out what makes it tick. and weather is a good example of what I'm trying to say here. weather cannot be predicted. we can get decent ideas, but at the same time we never really know for sure and also weather acts differently every time. there are too many variables. it's the entirety of the earth's atmosphere we're talking about here. identical weather conditions can arise time and time again, and each time the weather is different. a sunny afternoon one day is a washout the next. this is because -- and I broadly sum it up here -- there are so many tiny variables that we cannot possibly predict how they will change the weather. and I mean it's tiny variables. I'm sure you've heard of the butterfly effect -- this comes from the idea that a butterfly somewhere on the coast of Africa can flap its wings, and this tiny reverberation can spread through the atmosphere, creating a bigger and bigger ripple, until a hurricane smashes into the Gulf of Mexico. tiny atmospheric changes all interacting in ways we cannot imagine. this is why some kids shoot up schools. it's easy to look at psychology broadly, but no two people are ever the same. siblings growing up in the exact same house are not the same. identical twins, genetically identical to their very DNA, are not the same. tiny, tiny events, microdoses of chemicals in the brain, exposures -- they all change us in subtle ways. two people -- Kevin and I -- can grow up with almost identical familial issues and outlooks, but Kevin shoots up his school and I study my ass off and get myself to university to escape my parents. why? I don't know. I don't know what tiny little things might influence me one way and another kid in the other. personality, brain chemistry, waking up that morning and having enough or not -- I don't know. it's chaos theory. the variables are too small to say. nature vs nurture are only two variables out of millions. it's an oversimplification.

so to go back to the book -- who do I blame? neither of them. it was a perfect storm. we could say Eva didn't help, but I know of plenty of kids with decent parents who still committed such a crime. we could say that Kevin was just born bad, but there are plenty of people with his resentful outlook on life who don't commit mass murder, or any harm against anyone whatsoever. it's like how every tornado comes from a supercell, but not every supercell will spawn a tornado -- that final genesis point is unknown to us. we just can't predict it. there are no easy answers. there is no simple formula. we just don't know, and that's what makes Kevin's story -- and its real-life counterparts -- so terrifying.

#sorry for going off but this combines two (2) of my Major Academic Niches so you got the full 1hr lecture with slideshow i'm afraid #anon #asks

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icecreamkink · 3 years

Text

watched all of the untamed / cql in two weeks after my friend 1 told me abt mdzs a hundred years ago and my friends 2 and 3 tried to get me into cql for like two whole years and there are.

feelings.

very first scene is a very dramatic death in the middle of nightmare battle on sith planet land . i will forget abt it in the next tenish episodes and then will be very surprised when it becomes Extremely Painful

anyway magic flying gays and possession and human sacrifice! we are off to a great start

in retrospect, chaos goblin wei wuxian must have had a blast pretending to be so cRaZy and be as disruptive as he could as mo xuanyu lbr

listen. why is fire always evil coded. cant a magic clan wear red, black and orange and have flame motif while being wholesome?

For Legal Reasons These Are Not Zombies

i wish the politics of the sect were a bit clearer, especially at the beggining when the wen clan had sm power, was wen ruohan the chief cultivator? is that why they were so slow in responding to the attacks? im v confused by the pre yiling patriarch politics

fighting in the roof by the moonlight as way of flirtiiiiiiing. as i understand this is a wuxia/xianxia trope and honestly...... thank u for ur service

slight bullying and being a nuisance in general, as a way of flirting we love to see it

wwx: if i drink on the rooftop, thats not inside the cloud recesses! hmmm check and mate :D lwj: i will fuck u up so help me god wwx: :0

i lov them

through hell or high water (quite literally) wei wuxian rem ains a trashfire gremlin till the end and i love him with my whole heart

in the pt subs wei wuxian calls jiang cheng a stubborn duck and i dearly wish that had come back

my opinions on almost every character goes from love to hate u - Hmm Me Like U - BABY. ILY. and i am Very Pleased w that. its been a while since i loved such a complete cast so much i think

no really. i WONT go into a detailed rant abt what i love about each of these characters and each of their relationships to each other. but i COULD.

some lan disciples in the loudest whisper ever: YEAH THATS THE JIN BASTARD MENG YAO HEARD THE GOT SUPER HUMILIATED BY HIS DAD LOL SURE HOPE HE DOESNT TAKE SLIGHTS TO HIS CHARACTER TO HEART

lan xichen, immediately: i must Love him

being into problematic ppl is in the Lan genetics, we come to realize

wen qing deserves so many awards for so many things but not snapping and just stabbing wen chao is at the top

that scene at lan qirens class where wwx talks about using resentful energy to fight a violent spirit. exquisite.

It establishes Good Student lan wangji, wei wuxian as curious and questioning and not afraid of taboo, lwj sees that wwx is not, in fact, a dumb ass hes just a Dumbass, shows us the audience (esp. a western audience) how shocking the idea of disrupting the dead/dying and controlling resentful energy actually is, the theoretical foreshadow arguing, everyone else like ‘shUT UP’, “and how could you ensure that the resentful energy would obey you and not hurt other?” “well i havent thought that far” and of course, lan qiren just straight up lobbing a hard object at wwx head,. chefs kiss

fellas is it gay to bother the hot rule obessessed nerd from ur school and make drawings of him with flowers in his hair and then hide gay porn in his book to antagonize him and ask him to hold ur hand and be ur friend and talk to him all the time and get him drunk and give him bunnies bc you know he likes them and give him a lantern and always want his attention and dedicate yourself to getting him to smile-

and after all of that wwx rly said oh i Admire him, aksd like yeah we all were there in high school buddy

i have Learned. caves = gay.

accidental marriage +beint physically tied together with the sacred married ribbon+ gay panic+foreshadowing+bunnies! in the cave (1)

the story abt lan yi and baoshan sanren tho. i would like to see it

early days wen bros pull my heart strings like a guqin

EVERYTHING about the lantern scene; disaster hets jiang yanli and jin zixuan; how wwx made lwj a bunny lantern. how soft and touched lwj was. wwx gleefully pointing out he was smiling and lwj IMMEDIATELY PULLING HIW SWORD ON HIM LMAO. tragically foreshadowy promises to do right by pepople, living without regrets. lwjs 'oh no do i love him??' face. just. all of it.

i have it on good acc that in the novel lwj is explicitly Repressed Gay Panicked Big Horny which is delightful and rly Adds to the performance

baby lwj is really just conceal dont feel dont let them know u have EMOTIONS (derogatory)

jiang cheng rly went "why dont.u go play with HIM if u like him so much"

jc and wwx have big BIG annoying sibling energy dont think too hard abt it or youll cry

lotus pier is soo pretty :((((((((((((((((

up until episode 13 you could think this could be a magical ancient chinese gays pride n prejudice w swords and shenanigans ................youre just not prepared for the game of thrones of it all

seriously ha ha ha i cried so much w this show my eyes genuinely swelled up . like. physically. fun timez fun timez

that being said, its hilarious that wen xu goes to cloud recesses like 'come out or ill kill all these hostages' and then DOESNT WAIT FOR AN ASWER AND KILLS THEM ALL IMMEDIATELY. do u know how blackmail works sir

would like to make it recorded that from day one i was like 'CALL A GODDAMN CULTIVATION G20 THIS ASSHOLE SECT IS LITERALLY MASSACRING YALL!!' and it took them like 3 or 4 massacres to do anything and they STILL sent their heirs into their territory LIKE

when wwx cites the gusu lan rules to wen chao tho. that rebel/attention whore/cutie pie 'look lan zhan i DID memorize the rules after all' ‘also a big fuck you to the wen sect :D :D’ sweet spot that scene achieves . delicious

all the cultivator young masters being petty af even though they are practically prisoners at the cave is hilarious and i love them

hurt and comfort + gay mistunderstandings + watsonian gay declaration music + accidental evil acquisition! at the cave (2)

its like where do i start? the fact theyre both trapped and kind of heavily injured inside an isolated cave with a murder turtle? wwx gay panicking lwj into coughing up bad blood? lwj being jealous as wwx babbles abt mianmian? telling him he shouldnt play with people and wwx saying he never played him? wwx going Oh. I See what is happening. YOU like mianmian, and lwj absolute done face ??? (iconic) wwx touching the sacred married ribbon Again? the telepathic communication? the sword? WEI WUXIAN ASKING LAN WANGJI TO SING TO HIM AS HE IS PASSING OUT AND LWJ SINGING HIM. THE SONG. HE WROTE. FOR WWX. AND THAT HE CALLED. THEIR SHIP NAME????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

they are SO insufferable pleeeeease

in the words of my friend 1 : “CQL is so gay we were all amazed how it got past the censors Ofc unfortunately it can't be novel level gay But they did their best And we love them for it”

in the theme of songs THIS OST. WUJI HAS BEEN LIVING IN MY MIND RENT FREE SINCE I FIRST HEARD IT the whole ost is so so sO beautiful.

the costuming in this is also soooo exquisite. the embroidery? the fabrics? the details? how every sect and clan has a distinct style and architecture? (also ik they based each off of dif periods in chinese history which is REALLY fucking cool) just chefs kiss

the direction too!. i enjoy the unusual camera movements and i think they give it that Vibe, also their composition is PARTICULARLY good when it comes to telling the subtext through position of camera/position of character (like nhs off to the side in scenes he at first glance doesnt need to be/ how lwj is often centered when hes Jealous Yearning at wwx being affectionate w other ppl, wwx return from burial mounds etc)

ik madam yu is like Badass Milf Check and shes not getting any mom of the year awards but im delighted at how messy she is. IMAGINE that woman on tiktok

you better have enjoyed gay cave (2) bc its Just Pain from here on out!

jiang fengmian and madame yu win the Most Dramatic Way to show they do care about each other, actually ..... ever :)

i thought jiang yanli jiang cheng and wei wuxian forcing themselves to escape yunmeng barely holding on after their parents are killed was going to be the height of pain in this show. ha.

the family dynamics in general on this showwwww, both blood/ adopted/ found families, brotherly bonds and lifelong friendships just. rly. truly. fucked me up. theyre all so important and complicated and well rounded and beautiful and tragic

and beyond being a Win For the Gays im so glad the relationships w wwx and jiang yanli/ wen qing were NOT changed from platonic bc they are so much better like that imo. like maybe if we didnt Live In A Society it wouldnt be so, but the fact wwx and others can love and value them so much and theres nothing romantic or sexual abt it is like. so refreshing. especially @ jyl, with the way he and jc are overprotective of her and shes such a nurturing/care taker figure for them, it would just not vibe as well if they made it romantic

i love that this is a story abt Wei Wuxian, the Yiling Patriarch aka Actual Satan/Boogey Man/Village With/Public Enemy Number One , my dude is literally a necromancer who only dresses in black and has evil smokey black tendrils wafting out of him, but the really edgy one is still jiang cheng, pastel purple fashion icon

and speaking of best/worst siblings wei wuxian and jiang cheng *immediately starts crying*

The Golden Core Transfer i just. no thots only tears

wen qing and wen ning putting themselves in so much danger just.... to help them. wn saving jc from wen chao. wq finding a way to get wwx to transfer his core. like thinking about the monumental work these two did to help wwx and jyl and jc... jyl trying so fucking hard to be strong and keep on moving and giver her little brothers comfort after losing everything... jiang cheng. losing his parents and his home and his ability to do anything abt it and his complete desperation and lack of self worth and turning on them with agression when he didnt realize all that they did for him ... hhhhhhhhhhhhh

me, pointing at the whole cast “i just LOVE them mom!!!”

its sad tho, that BARELY ANY of the women have like.... actual important conversations let alone relationships with each other at all in the story. and like wq and jyl have stayed at the same place for extended periods of time, where wq actively took care of her TWICE, and still! not one measly convo, nothing! ................ .𝓌ₕᵧ

everyone in this show need a good sip of Self Worth and Stop Sacrificing Yourself juice

ngl the sword flying looks very dumb

“a-cheng, please bring a-xian back.” “i will, i promise.” ;-;

the whole calling each other by the More Intimate Version of the name, first as teasing and later as true intimacy. mmmhmmm yes

untamed where everythings the same but wwx evil flute song is eoeo

related that scene when wwx comes back from the burial mounds for the first time w demonic cultivation and he acts all formal and calls lwj hanguang-jun and keeps being evasive and distant and mean and soooooo................. facetious

and how hes kind of desperately trying to keep intense lwj at bay (A FIRST) and avoiding actually talking to either of them and its all tension ughhh and then he MOCKS his and lwjs relationship, he jokes w him in this like... mean echo of their usual ~banter~ oof

and like!!! uncertain but so relieved jc who just HUGS him w no reservations for once and its not like he isnt just as worried as lwj abt wwx and what hes doing, but he chooses in that moment to enjoy getting him back first and mmhmMMMmMm yes (maybe my favorite scene in the whole show? MAYBE SO. )

highkey hurt me but also. i might be into mean wwx. i will take no criticism.

lan zhans sad eyes tho :(((((((((

on one hand i wish we could have seen what happened at the burial mounds but on the other the timeskip adds so much flair to his return so im hnnn

also i love that hes been missing for 3 months reappears kinda melancholic and bloodthirsty and knowing malign tricks and jc is like 'so. are u sad bc of lan wangji'

when ur bae survived the war but he thinks ur evil/ might be evil so you cant kiss :///

hmmm talking at the rooftop under the moonlight not mentioning everything that stands between usssss

they are the two jades of lan and we’ll be the two heroes of yunmeng is the type of line u dont even need to know whats gonna happen to know thats gonna be sad

when they fight wen ruoshan at the nightless city i thought that was the battle we see at the first ep and its not and its so easy and theyre all like ‘yayy we won go wwx!’ i was just. SCREAMS WHAT is gonna HAPPEN

so like. post burial mounds/sunshot campaign pre yiling patriarch wwx is like. ultra arrogant, ultra mocking, peak lil shit and it gave me e v e r y t h i n g i wanted

even tho having the wen prisoners at the targets at phoenix mountain and still having wwx and jzx shooting the arrows was???? so.... tone deaf

wwx: fucking w demonic energy jyl: he has never done anything wrong in his life, ever <3 <3 (mood)

the parallels between meng yao/wei wuxian (and even xue yang a bit?) are Seen and they are Valid

wwx post burial mounds: can yall SHUT UP abt the goddamn sword (suibian left the chat)

LIKE truly, we talk abt the angst and yearning with wangxian. but what abt wwx and suibian. xianbian / xianqing angst and comfort 100k

take a shot everytime someone coughs up blood

zidian is simply the coolest spiritual weapon rip to suibian and chenqing and bichen and sendou and baixa........ but tis the truth

cons: everyones families died in a nightmare war! everyones homes burned to the ground! everyone is traumatized! pros: everyone gets cooler clothes and weapons!!

wen ning and a-yuan and yanli bestest babes squad dont touch me rn

everyone: brooding and fighting wq and jyl: why dont you try some acupunture/drinking some soup and calm down huh? how abt that bitch??

showing the battle/massacre at the nightless city first was genius actually bc then everytime we have a cute scene w yunmeng bros and theyre like 'we'll be together forever! uwu' youre like oh. oh no. oh no no no.

justice vs lawfulness vs means and ends 👁

jc: stay in the right path and practice the art of the sword wx: yeah thats not gonna happen chief

my reaction to wwx renouncing to the sect politics to help the wens was just that elmo burning gif in succession

the dramatic rain. wen qing desperately calling out to wen ning. the ghosts/puppets killing the guards. how terrifying wn actually was while wwx was controlling him :( lwj goeing after him to try and stop him and then he just; he Sees him and understands him even if he cant actually do anything about it other than let them go.

“there must be somewhere in this earth we can go to :(((((((((”

"IF I HAVE TO FIGHT THEM, I'D RATHER IT BE YOU. DYING BY YOUR HANDS WOULD AT LEAST BE WORTH IT." oh my god oh my god oh my goooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooddddddd

also lwjs umbrella is white w black smoke.. . . nice

yiling patriarch / demonic farming burial mounds settlement is like one of my favorite concepts. they an "EVIL" FARMING COMMUNITY LED BY THE VILLAGE WITCH COME ON

they planted TURNIPS and LOTUS FLOWERS and ONE (1) baby and made lanterns and a common hall :(((((((

wen qing and wei wuxian, baddest bitches and genius science best friends i absolutely LOVED to see it. they rly went ‘is anyone gonna sibling/project partner that’ and didnt wait for an answer

both wwx and jyl getting lotus ponds at the burial mounds and in lanling bc they miss lotus pier ;;;;;;;w

;;;;; wish jyl had actually gone into the burial mounds. we were robbed of jyl and wq meeting again and jyl meeting a-yuan and seeing the settlement and the homes and all ;w; at least jc did go, stab wounds and broken arms and all

wwx like... having thrown his whole life away to help the wens (yeah the sect leaders and jin guangshan in particular wanting his stygian tiger amulet was an Element but still) and not.... necessarily regretting it, but grappling with all of the consequences of it... becoming moody and drepressed at times, missing his family and lotus pier and his friends and probably simply missing being around people and causing trouble, extrovert that he is, lashing out at the wens and at a-yuan, just in general the whole messiness of that experience

the way the resentful energy does affect his temperament is rly nice bc its not too in your face,(i mean outside of the Shaky Hands of Rage) but like he clearly has a much lesser control on his anger and impulsivity (tall order) than both before bm and after hes ressurected

on that note A-YUAN BABIEST BABY BOY BEST BOY

lan zhan being like oh hey there wei ying fancy meeting u and our son here. just passing by u know how it is hmmmmMm and then PLOT TWIST having defied orders to go see him and being punished for it. oof;;

they habent seen each other in like? a year? and now theyre tgt 10 seconds and are already parenting a child together

also lwj rly kneels down in the snow way too much to be healthy

wwx: calm down guyssss i wont lose control of demonic cultivation omgggg . spoiler alert: he loses control of demonic cultivation

did u enjoy cute children? good bc now the Real Pain Begins

jiang yanli and jin zixuan rly out there APROPRIATING both disaster gays AND bury ur gays huh ;w;

i KNEW jin lings birthday was gonna fuck something up but the GASP that left my body when wwx lost control of wn and killed jin zixuan .. . .

im sorry and thank you aaaaAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaAAAAaAAAAA

when wen ning and wen qing were telling wwx their plan i was saying NO NO NO NO NO NO out loud in despair

also can we talk abt how wq is definetely talking about only the both of them surrending themselves but then? everyone else just surrenders w them? IT MAKES NO SENSE LIKE WHY WOULD THEY what would be the Point

sometimes there are some pretty gaping jumps in logic and continuity that are just like ? ?

wwx: oh so when you try to murder me its justified but when i survive through dark magic and murder all of you its a "war crime"

unsurprisingly, his most feral, most spiraling moment talking to the sect leaders on the roof and attacking them and even fighting lan zhan is among my favorite scenes... its like, so painful to watch but also so thrilling (and maybe my wen bbs dying arose some resentful energy in me what can i say)

and its JUST, all they ever wanted was to do good but then... war. and trauma. and hubris.

jiang cheng on the ground clearly thorn between what to do and feel is a Mood, lets just say

i was already crying when jyl showed up, but if i wasnt-

i suffered SO MUCH through this series trying to figure out WHY jc would kill wwx. and when i understood. its somehow not as bad as i thought and also MUCH MUCH WORSE

a look into my group chat during the last flashback episodes:

SO ANYWAY. after the BLOOD BATH and RIPPING YOUR HEART OUT and FEEDING IT TO YOU the untamed goes ‘ayy back to the present!! tu du dud ud du’

literally it ends a quarter into an episode and then KEEPS GOING i had to pause and stare blankly at the ceiling for an hour

babie cultivators and detective soulmates . i do need some cute after All of That

(not that the pain is over LOL)

lwj is significantly less emotionally repressed in the present and its delightful. hes just ALL IN with wwx. and not just in the ‘i would and have killed various men and risked my reputation for you’ but also ‘ur tired here have a drink i brought it up cause i know u like it and it want you to be happy, always’

“when everyone praised me and wanted my power, you were the only one that challenged me. now that everyone hates me and wants me dead, youre the only one that stands by my side.” hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhnnnnnnnnnnnnnn

and just filling in the blanks how lan zhan searched for him. for all of those 16 years he searched for him and was punished for it and raised a-yuan, the only survivor of the burial mounds settlement, as his own in gusu......

and jiang cheng. being the tough love uncle . having raised the yunmeng jiang clan from the rubble all alone, his whole family dead, some of it on the blame of his own brother, his siblings, his closest friends gone.......and only jin ling there needing his guidance.

THE PARALLEL BETWEEN JIN LING BEING A LIFELINE FOR JIANG CHENG AND A-YUAN FOR LAN WANGJI AFTER THE BATTLE AT THE NIGHTLESS CITY

great now i made myself sad

and like . the fact! that lwj and jc dislike each other!!. jc projects blame onto him for wwx both “leaving” him and indirectly causing their families deaths and when hes so consumed by it he makes wwx an enemy, lwj is there now? trying to protect him?? and lwj, who can never understand the pain that wwx , indirectly or not put jc through, but who was right there when jc tried to kill him and will never allow him to hurt wwx again. and how they like. in a way project blame of their tragedies onto each other while dealing with some type of survivor guilt and in their own way still loving wwx through it all??? amd in way its kind of fundamentally selfish but also tragically understandable? and like when u put it against the fact that after he disappears during the sunshot campaign they were looking for him together and fought together??

JUST. THE CHARACTERS. AND THE RELATIONSHIPS IN THIS. MAN. UGH. GOD.

and like i think thats what makes it so good? its such a sad and painful and violent story, edgy even, but its compelling bc at the center of it there are all of these relationships and different types of love and hope and. :( i love it

enough crying lets talk abt wwx sleeping at the jingshi with lwj and wearing his under garment for a minute 🙏

jin ling just has that Was Raised by JC energy tho lmao i love him

babie cultivator squad is the perfect ammount of cute and comedic relief while still bearing the weight? of the narrative in a way, both from sizhui and jin lings existences, and also. like. how do i put this. they feel hopeful? they were born after a war, they came of age at a time of relative peace, they dont hold on so closely to the resentments of their parents/father figures, they are specifically shown as more accepting and open minded. and its like.... Hope for the future

one of the ?? things i love the most is the fact that the main cast are often in situations where theyre hunted/running but they like. never wear disguises... just going around in their gorgeous expensive clan clothes and hair ornaments and distinctive spiritual weapons.... maybe w a straw hat on, just for kicks

wwx teacher 🥺🥺🥺

so this is why its called Yi City Misery huh

a-qing is such. an icon. im so sad. my girl even knew to leave xys dumb self rotting by the road but no one listens to her thats why theyre all dead or sad

her and xue yang measuring each other up was so entertaining lmao

its the funniest thing when hes like. HERES MY SAD STORY. FOR WHY IM A SADISTIC MURDERER. I BROKE MY HAND ONCE.

like ok someone broke his hand in a horrible way, and like Poverty, i get it but also like.......... that lost the brunt of a proper sob story like, 50 sadistic murders ago bby

and i love that xingchen does not entertain that for a second hes like ‘not ?????? good enough???’ and the best thing is he wasnt even like 'u hadto be the bigger person' or sth but ' well then break that dudes hand back, rip his arm off for i care, what do the rest of us have to do w anything???”

anjo sensato :(

xue yang is like..... the sexy sadistic evil version of a himbo..... a meanbo...

the fucked upness of xy’s feelings for xxc/ xxc and sl feelings for each other... like my dude literally gave his bf HIS EYES. and xy getting so attached to xxc .... the fucked up fake domesticity.... having him hurt sl..... then desperately trying to bring him back ...................... oof

song lan........... literally had his eyes AND tongue removed, his bfs eyes put in place, was almost killed, turned into a puppet by his bf unknowingly, manipulated by xy, sees his bf killing himself in despair.... and STILL finds the strenght to get up from there, and keep on traveling and helping people and attempting to fix xxcs soul.......... like, my man. damn.

wangxian looking at songxiao and seeing an Actually more painful parallel for themselves. ft. that Color Coding.

THE A-YUAN/SIZHUI REVEAL PUNCHED ME IN THE HEART but in a good way for a change

should have know that he would be the Best Boy the cute one w all the braincells

the butterfly AND the bunny lantern. i see how it is

u know is very convenient that no one can see the stark black veins on wen nings neck, ever

BAT WEN NING

wns face when lwj comes into wwx room like ‘:0 omg did u two finally get your shit together? good for you master wei good for u’

(they didnt) (yet)

DISASTER DRUNK LWJ. JUST. THRUST SOME CHICKENS TO SHOW UR RESSURECTED BAE THAT U LOVE THEM.

i have absolutely no idea WHY they gave lwj the same punishment for fighting his own sect/allies to protect the burial mounds as when they got drunk on cloud recess class days.... like? its such a ... emotional continuity error again

also is lwj gonna get an actual friend besides wwx , ever

mianmian marrying and having a family and a cute life after saying FUCK U AND UR SYSTEM TOO in a much less unhinged and dramatic way than wwx......... fills me w joy

also lol the idea that like. her husband not knowing that shes friends w satan/the boogey man/the village witch is hilarious

i love nie mingjue bc hes the resident Though Guy but also the most dramatic bitch in this show and thats Saying Something

jin ling cant have one uneventful relative can he

the fact that everyone present already knew “mo xuanyu” was wwx at the stairs is so funny, their faces are like ‘oh............ wow. that. sure is a development. shock”

in the tradition of extremely loud whispers wwx tells lwj with twelve guards standing like one meter away from them: HEY PSH LAN ZHAN PRETEND IM FORCING YOU TO STAY W ME DO IT

oh my god oh my god

the absolute Yearning on his face when he leaves wwx and a-yuan at the burial mounds and refuses to stay for dinner was already Enough but the fact?? they brought it back?? to this declaration of love?? their expressions??????? strike me dead right now just go ahead

lFor Legal Reasons We Cant Kiss but we will have a very sappy declaration of love and trust and look at each other in way that is the actualization of 💞💘💗💖💓💘💞💗💖💘💗💖💕💞

also icb all the sect leaders and guards are standing there watching them say they like like each other with a dozen swords pointing at their neck

i enjoyed the depiction of the fickle public perception and how easily it can be used to scapegoat people. when the sect leaders turn on jgy and wwx knows thats its more for convenience than anything else...

poor lxc is literally like 'oh so when YOUR problematic boyfriend gets called evil its a misunderstanding but when its MY problematic bf-'

ok like i cant get over nmj let jgy play a song that messed with his temperament at all, like maN u KNEW he might be shady wth

wwx: “hey dont say anything bad abt lan zhan hes not an arrogant dick, thats just his face.

ME ON THE OTHER HAND"

the cultivators as wwx is poking holes in their narrative is literally *nazaré meme*

"wei wuxian-!" "what did i break your leg, too?" not to be problematic but i laughed so hard

not as hard as "you dont have the rank to talk to me " tho

i Enjoy that, over the course of story, wwx sees that... theres nothing truly to Do, but move on. he saw how his arrogance and his mistakes hurt others, and hes trying to fix what he can, but he already did die for his mistakes and there are things he cant fix and that's. just how it is. even towards jgy, the narrative doesn't go gleefully and completely with "lets make THEM pay bc theyre the big bad" bc its not that simple, and it wouldn't lead anywhere but more pain...

re him and jiang cheng and the wens and kinda. isnt that what nhs did? scheming to displace jgy out of revenge more than any justice and doing so in the most painful way?

idk if that actually makes sense im truly just babbling

i thought the scene at the lotus pond would be CUTE but the context was PAIN again

jiang cheng finding out about his golden core and his conflict with wwx at the guanyin temple .... destroyed me but in a nice way kinda.... same way it destroys him look at his face oh god

and. the fact??? he sacrificed himself for wwx?? first?? and he'll probably never tell anyone much less wwx???? keeps me up at night

i havent decided if the neckbreak transition between jgy does sth super Evil or does he he does OR Does He yes he does O R does heeeee is sth i dislike or not

jin guangyao and wei wuxians most interesting parallel is that... theyve both seen 'hmm hey this system is fucked up' and wwx went 'so fuck it all i will renounce it and challenge it' and jgy went 'so fuck it i will use all of it to my advantage and manipulate it to my goals and whims'

the fact jgys mom was actually great and he loved her and his whole issue w it was more than simply being ashamed of being a bastard kinda got me ngl

never trust a dude with a fan.

nhs and jgy: the first rule to a convoluted and decades spanning violent revenge plot is to have fun and be yourself!

when a-yuan finally FINALLY remembers ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;-;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; wen ning has someone in his family back and a-yuan has someone to talk abt his wen family and wwx has him back bc he survived and lwj raised him anD HES THEIR SON. THEYRE MARRIED AND HAVE A SON. UGH.

and theyre allowed to heal. everyone is allowed to try and recover and be happy

netflix put all of the 3 endings on top of each other and it looks kinda weird actually BUT I DONT EVEN MIND :’’’’’’’’’)

the gasp that left me when lwj says ‘wei ying’ and wwx turns.........

there was also a screen with ‘thank you mxtx for creating these characters, we hope their wishes come true’ and i might. have cried then too. maybe.

that was . a ride. as is proven by this behemot of a ramble clearly i just really needed and Outlet. i am currently trying to convince dumb monkey brain to not consume the other medias of mdzs immediately bc i REALLY need to like. live. a life. and take care of real responsibilities. *longest oh boi ever*

#m.#ANYWAY #ENOUGH TALKING #THIS IS SO LONG #LOL #but whatever this is MY performative journaling i do what i want #rambling impressions abt what i watch is a thing i do now? apparently??#cql #untamed #the untamed #fun fact that chat is named 'k keeps on babbling abt the untamed' and it STILL wasnt enough #also it took me 15 episodes to realize lwj was yibo #IT WAS V SHOCKING #i did not recognize him at a l l #but in retrospect he WAS the perfect choice

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blissfulparker · 4 years

Text

Seasick pt.3→peter Parker

Parings→peter Parker x reader

AU: best friends to lovers! Fake dating!

Summary→ when you lie to your mom about having a boyfriend before vactation peter steps in to help. But being in a fake relationship isnt as easy as you thought. especially not easy when you two have feelings for one another.

Warnings→rude comments, mostly fluff, still slowburn, and sadly I’m a slut for the one bed trope so yeah😔

A/n→ this is a little late I know! It’s also pretty long, a lot longer than I thought. I hope you enjoy! I’m going to try and do weekly updates but I’m now in school so I’m not sure how much I can update. Masterlist is coming for this soon so if you wanna be on the taglist send me an ASK!(I also lost the original seasick Taglist I’m so sorry!!)

Soft blue Hawaiian shirt, grey khakis is what Peter wore. You told him to dress casual, and even after he told may he didn't need any help packing, he was still hoping she slipped in some good outfits. He looked out the small window getting a glimpse of the waves crashing outside, it didn't help his fear, it only fed it. But he needed something to distract his mind before tonight. He was already scared of his decision even though technically it hadn't been one full day on the cruise.

“So..uh..” he turns and sits on the bed. “How long has it been since you've seen your family?” He starts a conversation.

“My mom and dad? Christmas. My sisters? Thanksgiving. And my aunts...gah i don't even know how long but...um...i talk to my aunt laya a lot so she will be the most excited.” you tell him as you slide the hoop earring through your ear. After this trip, Peter might know the most about you more than anyone in the group, that scared you a little bit.

But christmas, thanksgiving? Those were all so far away. He knew you, MJ, and Betty took a road trip for spring break so he did not question the lack of seeing your family then. The idea of not seeing your parents since christmas shocked him because he saw May almost every weekend when he wasn't busy and called her every other day. He couldn't really imagine ever not wanting to see her, he's sure that when he gets settled down one day he'll move into the neighborhood he grew up in with May nearby.

“Wow.” he mumbles to himself before his phone rings.

Two missed messages from May, a text from ned, and a notification from an app. He goes to May first. Hers simply just tell him to have fun and not stress out, call him if anything happens. Ned on the other hand is more playful.

Ned: Having fun loverboy?

Ned: You two kiss yet?

His teasing words make Peter roll his eyes and shove his phone back into his pocket.

“Who was that?” you come out of the bathroom all dressed up. The dress is long and down to your ankles but a slit going up the thigh. The soft blush that tickles your cheeks and the gloss that brings up your lips. It was almost like aphrodite crafted you herself. Your skin looked so soft and golden. At this moment, you looked so golden.

“U-Um just May.” he clears his throat and presses his lips together. You walk up to him and hold his shoulders. You stand close and lean in, he wants to press his eyes shut for this feels so much like a dream, your touch, your scent, spending a whole week on a cruise with you, all of it feels so much like a dream.

“Im taller than you.” you groan as you let go of him. He wakes up, he wakes up from his daydream and looks at you with confused eyes.

“W-What?” he stutters and you sit on the bed taking off the wedges you had just strapped on. You are already hating the dinner and you didn't even show up yet. You slip on some sandals, something easy to kick off after the night ends.

“To save you, I'm just gonna wear flats.” you tell him standing again and this time you're now eye level and face to face with him. He doesn't really understand why you can't be taller than him but you're far more stressed out about this dinner than he is.

“You look really pretty by the way.” he tells you. For your understanding hes saying this as fake peter, the fake boyfriend peter. But to him, deep down, he means it with his whole heart.

“Thanks.” you look down and then look back up at him looking at his shirt. You come up and unbutton one button so it doesn't look like he tried so hard. “You look really pretty too.” you smile and then look over to the door.

“Are you ready?” and just like that you two were off to one of the most confusing dinners of each other lives.

When you two arrived at the restaurant he immediately noticed how nice it was, all the families, couples, friends were dressed well for a night under the ocean's stars. He swallowed hard before you took him by surprise, grabbing his hand you held it tight.

“Hey,” you looked at him. “Don't be nervous okay? I'll take most of the lead, just follow me.” you told him and he nodded.

“I think it's normal for me to be nervous about meeting my fake girlfriend's family for the first time.” he laughs it off a little just thinking back to the pep talk Ned gave him before he left. Don't be scared peter, it's just (y/n). He reminds himself as he takes a deep breath.

As you two approach the table he can start figuring out whos who. He knows your mom and your dad already, he can see two women who look to be in their mid twenties who look like you, your sisters. Then he sees what seems to be your aunts at the table as well.

“Oh, (y/n) its been so long.” your sister kisses your cheek and you hum into the kiss. Her eyes then pan to peter, your biggest stressor.

“And you must be perry?” her voice is already annoyed and you groan as you're not ready for the things she's about to say to both you and peter.

“Peter, actually.” he reaches his hand out for her to take and she does with a wimp grasp. She shakes it almost as if he was sick and just wiped his nose. She looks at him with a more disgusted look, her bright red lips in more of a scrunch and she takes her hand back quickly when shes done.

“Right.” she nodded and then looked at you. “He's so…cute.” she scrunched her face before sitting back down. Ouch. Peter thought.

“Oh and the fun begins.” you whisper in his ear as you two sit next to each other. At first the two of you were stiff but then realized that would make it too obvious. He pretended to get an eyelash so it looked like you two were comfortable. His hand also rested on your shoulder as the conversion began.

“So…” your other sister who had not had a proper introduction leaned in to pay attention to you and peter. “When did you two lovebirds meet.” just by her words, she had gotten attention from half the table.

“Oh i can tell this story angel.” he rubbed your thigh for everyone to notice. He was good, better than you thought. You never took peter as a leader, especially for someone as a kid who would almost every time cry after having to present something--which he of course stopped after he got into highschool.

“We grew up together basically, I met her through our mutual friend. I'm sure you all know MJ.” he pauses and you catch your sister already rolling her eyes as she brings her wine glass to her lips. Your other sister was still amused but it was only to be polite to peter. “We spent highschool together and then we had a europe trip going into our senior year and that's where we found out we had mutual feelings but we sorta put them to rest after we--” and he goes on a little, you're more fascinated after the story with how far he told it. His hand rests on your thigh and suddenly you're relaxed with your lie.

“Wow, that's so sweet.” your youngest eldest sister, maya, hums as she takes a sip of her drink. “Like little soulmates.” she scrunches her face and once again you were annoyed. Yanked out of your paradise just like that.

“And now they go to Columbia, of course.” your older sister hums under her breath and Peter furrows his brows a little but ignores it.

“Peter majors in computer science and is minoring in physics.” you wrap your warm around his shoulders and get close. “He had all A’s last semester and is top of the class, he also works at the stark tower, he maintained an internship there every summer in highschool.” you kiss his cheek.

“And he went for you?” your sister asks in the most petty way possible.

Peter didn't have any siblings, his closest thing to a brother was Ned, his closest thing to a sister was probably betty. He knew families could argue, have feuds, but he never thought a sister would be this rude to another. Especially not an older sister to a younger one.

“Yeah he did-” you start but your mother glares you a look. Peter's hand rests a little more harshly on your thigh to remind you he was here.

“You should be giving (Y/N) a reason to stay then, she talked about transferring to NYU at thanksgiving. (Y/N) are still planning on transferring?” Peter's eyes went straight to yours after your mother's words. Did MJ know? Did Betty know? Did Ned know? Were you going to transfer without telling anyone? He even notices how your face goes from smiling to scared and shocked after your little secret is revealed.

“I-uh,” you look over at peter. Your sister smirks almost like she was glad. “I'm still thinking.” you chuckle off and look down at your dress, you look down at peters hand.

“All of us transferred mom, it's only natural she’ll do the same.” your sister says with a sigh, a more evil one and peter knew that too.

The table started on something else again. taking the focus away from you two as they started talking about your sister and her life. You were just glad that things didn't go too far.

You and Peter eat in silence. This was probably some of the best food in his life but it was hard to enjoy because of all the things happening.

“(y/n) you should try a juice cleanse,” your sister chipped in. “i heard it helps lose weight and with stress.” she gives a smile and even through your sisters pretty eyes, soft hair, coconut scent, and beautiful summer dress, she was still the worst.

Peter starts to open his mouth but you quickly push him back a little as a smile rises to your own lips.

“No, I don't think I will.” you tell her before going back to eating the same pasta you've been ordering on this cruise since you were 16.

How could sisters be so mean to each other, especially at such an old age. Peter was shocked by the comments about him to you. Maybe the reason you never brought them up was to save yourself, to spare yourself the pity.

He watches as your dad pays the bill, he watches as the family gets up and you do too. Your mom pulls you in for a kiss and hug before she sends you off for the night, the sister who did the least teasing gave you a hug but peter a most lasting one with a kiss to his check which made you roll your eyes. Your eldest sister gave you a quick hug before giving Peter a fake smile, and your aunt who barely spoke the whole night pulled Peter into a hug first.

“Take care of her kiddo, she deserves it.” she whispers into his ear and he gives him a soft nod and smile.

“I will.” was probably some of the truest words to come out of his mouth the entire night.

The hotel door slams shut and you once again make your way to the bathroom. Leaving peter in the middle of the room he turns on the T.V. and starts to unbutton his shirt. At this point he doesn’t know how things will go, he thought it was just going to be a family who was excited to see him, not ones who will tear each other down.

As a kid, Peter dreamed of siblings. Having a brother and a sister, playing airplanes with them and maybe getting into fights over toys but nothing like this. That’s why he’s always dreamt of his own family one day too, he wants one but is always conflicted with his secondary job as the cities hero.

He takes off his shirt and throws it into the suitcase, he picks up an old AC/DC one from years ago but still was comforted by it.

“Hey pete I’m out of the—woah—“ you cover your eyes as you just saw him half naked. He immediately covers himself up with the shirt, a look of shock takes over his face as he burns red and his mouth drops open.

“S-Sorry! I didn’t know that you would come out—“ he stuttered and then slid on his shirt.

“I’m just gonna…take the couch…” you grab a pillow and he stops you.

“Why?” He asks as he crawls into the left side of the bed.

“Because it’s one bed, and besides I dragged you into this mess the least I can do is give you the bed.” You tell him and he shakes his head.

“You said the bed is big enough for the both of us remember? So it’s fine we won’t touch each other.” He shrugs and you give him a look of defeat. “After everything tonight I think you deserve it.” He told you and you sighed climbing into the bed. The sheets feel just as soft as last summers, the cotton plump around your body and the bed memory foam. Makes you think your dorm bed is a rock. Makes peter almost fall asleep instantly as he’s never felt anything like this before expect the times he sleeps at the stark tower.

“Sorry about tonight.” You fumble with the sheets. He bites down on his lip before answering.

“You never told me about any sisters, you never told anyone about any sisters.” He says and you take a deep breath.

“Can you blame me?” You chuckle and his eyes filled with pain for you, he sees how much the friend group really means to you now, how you use them as an escape from your normal life. But a luxury life like this couldn’t be so awful all the time could it?

“I mean sisters fight don’t they?” He tries to help but you rub your face in response.

“Yeah, over toys and makeup, hair straighteners and shampoos, maybe school and boys but you’ve only seen the surface of them peter. if you thought that was bad come back on Friday and tell me what you think.” You roll to the other side. Peter wants to reach out and touch you, he wants to touch the hair that fell loose, he wants to comfort you so you don’t hurt the whole time.

“What did my aunt Layla say anyways?” You asked from the other side and his heart begs to tell the truth but he can’t blow the cover, can’t make things awkward.

“Just..she was happy. Tis’ all.” He told you and you seemed to believe it.

“Thank you for everything by the way.” You turn back to him and look at him fully. You never noticed how he has a scar on his eyebrow, or all the freckles that paint his face, or even the colors of his eyes are different on the outside. You never noticed anything until now. “You’re really, really good at this.” You told him with a soft chuckle.

“You too.” He nods, swallowing hard he watches you turn back to your side and leave him be. Soon enough he can hear your snores and drifts off himself.

Day one down and he knew this would be the longest week of his life.

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queen-of-deans-booty · 4 years

Text

Serotonin

Characters: Dean Winchester x Reader, Sam Winchester

Word Count: 2,031

Warnings: soft smut, cockwarming, fluff, mention of children on cases

Request by @sharp-cheekbones-locked: Can you write a DeanxReader where a hunt went wrong and the reader needs to get out so Dean drags her into Baby and they drive around. They are no couple yet just best friends. Somewhen they stop it's dawn and they lay on the hood of the car while they watch the sunset and gaze stars. They end up holding hands, cuddling, kissing. If you want smut in baby.

Summary: Dean is your best friend, and you’ve always wanted to be more. If it happens, then it happens, and if it’s going to happen, then it’s going to happen now.

Squares Filled: driving in the impala for @spndeanbingo // god helps those who help themselves for @as-the-saying-goes-bingo // healer for @spnfluffbingo // “I’m fine. It’s just that life is pointless and nothing matters and I’m always tired.” for @spnquotebingo

Author’s Note: This is unbeta’d and all mistakes are mine. If you have any requests, please send them in!

Hunts don’t always go as planned. Sometimes they allow room for ideas and improvising thinking that can either got o shit or it can save your life. Sometimes the monsters aren’t always what they seem, and you have to change your way of thinking and planning in order to get the monster. Sometimes, a hunt can take a turn for the worst, and you’re left with a dead child, a dead monster, and a lot of blood that’s been spilled.

It’s no one’s fault. You can’t ever predict this kind of behavior. Monsters act on their own accord, and you’re never really sure what you’re dealing with until you do. The child that died wasn’t anyone’s fault--it was a complete accident, but that doesn’t stop your brain from thinking back to your past, the decisions you’ve made, and the worry you now carry on your shoulders.

No one is safe, not even children anymore.

The entire ride home was spent in complete and utter pain of the choices you’ve made, worrying about where they are now and what they’re doing. Wondering if a monster is ever going to attack or grab at your choices. You know for a fact they aren’t in this life because you made sure they were far from it.

It’s weird how all you want is to hold him close as if being right by your side is safer than being on the other side of the world from you.

Dean can see just how much this hunt is taking a toll on you, but he doesn’t know how to ask you about it. The bags under your eyes are heavy, your shoulders sag from all the weight and stress you’ve been carrying, and your body is just tired. As soon as you trudge through the door, he says something.

“Are you okay?”

“I’m fine. It’s just that life is pointless and nothing matters and I’m always tired,” you shrug.

“Okay, come with me.”

“Dean--”

“Just for a drive. Give me twenty minutes of your time.”

“Okay,” you whisper.

Sam takes yours and Dean’s bags since he knows something is up too. He wants to be of help in any way, but he knows Dean is going to help more. You’re much closer to the oldest brother than to the youngest. You’re the oldest sibling as well, you had to parent your younger siblings before, and you had to take on much more responsibilities than the others just to make sure they were having the time of their lives.

You know a thing or two about what Dean has been through, so he’s the brother you leaned on the most whenever you needed someone. You two are just friends, but the possibility of being something more has always been in the back of your mind. You’ve never done anything about it because you don’t want to ruin what you two have.

Plus, your friendship is more than amazing--he’s everything you could ever need in a best friend.

If you two happen, then you two happen. You’re very much happy with either of those choices. As long as he’s in your life, there can be no wrong. You’re just not going to actively search for something that doesn’t want to be found. You haven’t found it in ten years, and you’re not sure if you’ll ever find it in him.

The drive away from the bunker is nice. The windows are down, there is a nice breeze going on outside, the rock music is low and soothing, and your best friend is right next to you. There haven’t been any words exchanged on this ride since you two have got int he car, and that’s alright. Dean knows you’ll talk to him when you’re ready to talk. In the meantime, he’s just going to keep driving.

That twenty minutes took forty that also turned into an hour and a half. Right now, you’re parked on top of a hill that’s surrounded by trees overlooking the small city. The air is so clear and the sky is so dark that you can see the stars as if they were right in front of you and not millions of light-years away. The sun is almost going down, and it gives off a dull pinkish hue that makes everything seem magical. You two are ling on top of Baby’s hood, just lying in silence. That silence is broken when you sigh deeply with a shake of your head.

“You don’t know this about me, but when I graduated high school, I got pregnant,” you begin.

You can’t fathom the thought of looking at Dean right now, so you opt to look at the stars as if they are listening to you.

“I got pregnant with someone horrible. I left and had the baby all on my own. I wasn’t in the right mind to care for a child, so I put him up for adoption. I made sure he got adopted into a loving home with amazing parents--parents who are better than I could ever be. I got pregnant with someone truly horrible, but all I felt for my baby boy was pure love.

“All I could think was, ‘how can someone as beautiful as you come from someone as evil as him?’. I got scared knowing he’s all I’d ever want and need but also knowing that he deserved a lot more than me. Seeing that little boy yesterday brought it all back. I can’t even imagine my son in the hands of those monsters. I can’t even imagine my son always looking over his shoulder because something might be there to eat him if he’s not careful.

“I keep telling myself that with him being on the other side of the world with loving parents and a great home is a helluva lot better than being by my side with monsters and demons and guns. I don’t know what I’d do if I knew he was in danger without me being by his side. I make sure he’s okay. I have the family send me letters and postcards of him without him knowing. I have them sent to a P.O. Box a few towns over.

“But every time I see a child on our hunts, I think of him. What if it is him? What if the monsters got to him because he wasn’t prepared? What if they brought him to me just so they could rub it in my face that they are the ones killing him? It drives me insane just thinking about it, and I hate it. That’s why I get like this whenever a child is involved. I figured if anyone should know, it’s you.”

You finally have the courage to look at Dean, only to find out he’s already looking at you. His green eyes swirl with admiration and sympathy. You’re nothing to admire, but he’s on a whole other level right now.

“Thank you for telling me,” he says.

“You’re my best friend. I figured I owe you at least an explanation instead of shutting you out,” you chuckle dryly.

“You do that anyway.”

“I do,” you laugh.

You two stay like that, just staring into each other eyes. You’re afraid to make the next move in fear of it being the wrong one, so you just stay like that. It’s a nice night, and you don’t want to leave the bubble you blew around yourself. Just you and Dean, Baby, the stars, and nothing else to distract you two. If anything is going to happen, it’s going to happen now--you don’t know when and you don’t know how, but you have a feeling this is what you’ve been waiting for over ten years.

The stars twinkle in support for you two, and you find yourself leaning closer to Dean. Either you’re doing it or he is--maybe both--but your lips meet his in the middle. His lips are a lot softer than you’d imagine them to be with how much he licks, bites, and chews on them. His hand is soft against your cheek, just barely letting you know he isn’t going to be anything but gentle with you. Normally, you’d go for the much rougher side of things, but right now, you’re grateful for some tenderness.

You’re not exactly sure how you two ended up in the backseat of baby, but you can’t think of anything else except for the weight of his body against yours. Clothes peel off like old skin trying to shed from its new body. Two hearts beat as one the longer you spend pressed against his bare body. His lips are cool against your heated skin, yet the ignite the fire within you.

There’s no need for foreplay. You’ve had ten years’ worth of foreplay to encourage this one evening. He slides in easily as if he’s meant to be inside you this entire time. Out of all the men you’ve been with, never has someone felt as good as Dean does. It’s like the stars created you two to be together and with no one else.

Shocks of pleasure course up your spine, causing you to throw your head back. His lips attach themselves to your breasts, his hands grip your hips, and his cock hits places you never knew were there. His hips snap to yours quicker and faster, and the serotonin in your brain kicks in at full speed.

“Shit, Dean, you feel so good,” you moan.

“Are you going to come for me?” he whispers against your skin.

“Yes,” you let out a breathy moan.

“Do you want me to come in you?”

“Yes.”

“As you wish, sweetheart,” he grunts.

At the same time, his hips go just a bit harder causing his cock to push just a bit deeper. The car is filling up with sweat, heat, and the delicious smell of sex. Condensation covers the window, and you’ve always wanted to be like Rose in the Titanic when she has sex in the car with Jack. It’s not needed, but you slam your hand against the window, leaving behind evidence of your love.

Without detaching from your right breast, he moves his hand further south and rubs your clit in small circles. The immediate stimulation from that including the way his cock hits what you can only assume is your g-spot is enough to send you over the edge. Dean has been picturing this moment in his mind for a long time, and now that he gets to experience it with you, it’s enough to send him tumbling over the edge with you.

Your orgasm mixes with his in an attempt to create a child, but you know that’s impossible. Your first and only child was a miracle because you had almost died during childbirth, and the doctor explicitly told you that children weren't good odds for you in the future. Maybe they would happen with Dean, but you’re not getting your hopes up.

You come down from your high, but the serotonin in your brain stays at its peak level. Just being with Dean is enough to keep you on that high for the rest of your life. His cock softens inside you, but he doesn’t move to take it out. He likes staying where it’s warm, and you don’t mind the comfort.

“I love you,” you whisper when you get enough strength to stare into his eyes.

“I love you,” he repeats back to you.

“Let’s stay like this for a while. It feels nice,” you mutter and close your eyes.

“Yeah, it does,” he nods.

He moves while still keeping you locked onto him. You don’t know how he does it, but he has managed to flip you so he’s resting on the backseat with you on top of him. He didn’t want to crush you, but he likes having your weight on top of him. It’s reminding him that there is some good left in this world. It’s hard to find and it’s not always what you’re looking for, but once you have it, all the bad seems worth it.

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starsmuserainbow · 3 years

Text

1OO IMPORTANT CHARACTER QUESTIONS

taken from beth kinderman and nikki walker’s the 100 most important things to know about your character. a good list to help develop a character’s background, personality, and general aspects.

(Template link here)

PART 1: THE BASICS

What is your full name?

"Koriand'r, but on Earth it is Starfire!"

Where and when were you born?

"On Tamaran, in the castle. We were still in the war with the Gordanians."

Who are/were your parents? (Know their names, occupations, personalities, etc.)

"Myand'r, the Grand Ruler of Tamaran, and Luand'r, his wife! They were very wonderful! They have cared for us as well as they could, I believe, and I do not doubt that they have loved us very much!"

Do you have any siblings? What are/were they like?

"... Blackfire is my older sister. I have always looked up to her, but she is very much not interested in a positive bond between us. She is a criminal, I believe many parts of the galaxy are searching for her, and she has multiple times before attempted to capture me or bring me into the hands of those who would not be very nice to me.

I much prefer to talk about my baby brother, Ryand'r, or Wildfire as he is calling himself on Earth! We have long thought that he has died when he was still very small, but he has survived and lived many years in complete isolation! He has grown to be very wonderful and nice and friendly, and I am loving him a lot! I am most thankful that he has by now returned to my life!"

Where do you live now, and with whom? Describe the place and the person/people.

"I am living with my best friends, the Teen Titans! Our home is commonly called the 'T-Tower', and it is a very accurate description as it is a building with many floors and in the shape of a T!

Raven is as close to me as I am imagining a sister to be that does not constantly wish to harm me! She is skilled in magic, and she has to meditate for calming her emotions because her powers can be dangerous when she is feeling too strongly! This is also leading to her appearing very calm or 'unemotional' in many situations, I am knowing that she is loving us as much as we her!

I am most admiring Beast Boy's talent for joking! It often is about things that I do not initially understand, but I am still certain that his jokes are always very funny and most entertaining!

Cyborg is very skilled with technology. He has equipped our home with its security, he created our communicators, and he is also very much enjoying to play the games of the video together with Beast Boy!

Our leader is Robin! He is very trained, he knows many types of the martial arts, and I am very much enjoying to fight alongside him! Some times he can be too focused on his work, but we are all trying what we can to make him realize it and stop, and I believe it has bettered over the time that we are together."

What is your occupation?

"I am a hero, one of the Teen Titans! We are using what we are capable of to protect the people of the city - and the planet - from dangers and any form of harm!"

Write a full physical description of yourself. You might want to consider factors such as: height, weight, race, hair and eye color, style of dress, and any tattoos, scars, or distinguishing marks.

"I am commonly wearing my tamaranean uniform, which is mostly purple and combined with silver metallic armor! I believe I am taller than the average human, I am thin and do not have any tattoos, scars or similar! As with all of us tamaraneans, my skin is more orange, or golden, than a human one, and my eyes are having their green color both in the sclera and the pupil! Oh, and I am having long red hair, which I preferto wear untied!"

To which social class do you belong?

"A... a social class? I have never visited the earthen schools!" [[Well, on Tamaran probably upper/highest class since she's of the royal family, and on Earth, average I assume? So probably middle, or something?]]

Do you have any allergies, diseases, or other physical weaknesses?

"I am allergic to metallic chromium."

Are you right- or left-handed?

"My right hand is the one that I am using predominantly!"

What does your voice sound like?

"I believe I am having a very friendly and light voice! But I cannot describe voices well."

What words and/or phrases do you use very frequently?

"There have before been people mimicking me by reciting 'glorious' or 'wonderful', so perhaps those!"

What do you have in your pockets?

"My communicator! A bit of cat food, oh! And this is a drawing that I have been given by a child earlier!"

Do you have any quirks, strange mannerisms, annoying habits, or other defining characteristics?

"People have before mocked me by using very many times of the 'the' in each sentence, so perhaps that is a thing? Although I have never understood this mockery. I am also very much enjoying to hug people - but that cannot be a bad thing, no?"

PART 2: GROWING UP

How would you describe your childhood in general?

"It was a very wonderful childhood! I have grown up with parents that loved me very much, I had two siblings, and I have been able to learn much! There also was our caretaker, Galfore, I am still very close to him and thankful for his advice. ... I would have wished for chances to explore and learn about other worlds already during my childhood, but I can understand how it was too big a risk!"

What is your earliest memory?

"I remember playing a game with my father! I am very happy that this is a memory I recall, especially since at a later time of our lives, he did not have as much time for us anymore."

How much schooling have you had?

"I have completed all the tamaranean schooling! It is not working in the same way as the earthen system, so I cannot compare it."

Did you enjoy school?

"Of course! It was most fascinating to learn about every thing!"

Where did you learn most of your skills and other abilities?

"Most of it has been trained on Tamaran! But with my friends I am also continuing to strengthen my abilities!"

While growing up, did you have any role models? If so, describe them.

"My father! He was wonderful to us, and also a great ruler even in the times of war! I have always admired him. ... I have also very much looked up to my sister. She has always been so strong, so independent and so experienced..."

While growing up, how did you get along with the other members of your family?

"I have gotten along very well with my mother and father! And Ry was most adorable and we were very close as well! ... I have always assumed that I was also getting along well with my sister, but by now I have realized that such never has been the case."

As a child, what did you want to be when you grew up?

"... I have always wanted to be like my sister. ... And I have wished to be able to explore other worlds!"

As a child, what were your favorite activities?

"I have often strolled through the royal garden! ... as long as it has still existed. It was also very entertaining to be taught by Galfore, in cooking and about the history and the customs and how to fight!"

As a child, what kinds of personality traits did you display?

"I do not believe that my personality has changed much since my childhood!"

As a child, were you popular? Who were your friends, and what were they like?

"As children of the royal family, we were very... shielded. There were not many other children that we have met, so I do not believe that there was a chance to truly measure popularity. Those that I did meet liked me though, I believe."

When and with whom was your first kiss?

"Kissing does not carry such a meaning for my people. It is default that as children, we are having lip-contact with multiple teachers, to train the assimilation of languages and to learn the most important languages."

Are you a virgin? If not, when and with whom did you lose your virginity?

If you are a supernatural being (i.e. mage, werewolf, vampire), tell the story of how you became what you are or first learned of your own abilities. If you are just a normal human, describe any influences in your past that led you to do the things you do today.

"My abilities are normal for the tamaraneans, so while I am an alien to this world, I do not think that there is a story that I can tell."

PART 3: PAST INFLUENCES

What do you consider the most important event of your life so far?

"Having met my friends, and having found a home with them!"

Who has had the most influence on you?

"That is either Galfore or my friends of now!"

What do you consider your greatest achievement?

"It has felt like a big success when I had beaten my sister for the second time. And that even while she had used the Jewel of Charta, which was making her much stronger and less vulnerable."

What is your greatest regret?

"I am still feeling very sorry for the destruction that I have initially caused on Earth."

What is the most evil thing you have ever done?

"That destruction, I believe."

Do you have a criminal record of any kind?

"I do not know! But as I have caused damage on this world, I assume it would only be right if it is noted somewhere, no?"

When was the time you were the most frightened?

"After we have watched a movie, Raven's powers had once brought the monsters and the spookiness from the movie to life! It has been a very frightening situation."

What is the most embarrassing thing ever to happen to you?

"I have many times misunderstood the earthen phrases. At times, the people around me are laughing very openly about it. That is making me feel very embarassed."

If you could change one thing from your past, what would it be, and why?

"I would hope to be able to better the connection to my sister!"

What is your best memory?

"I will never forget how Robin has assured me that Blackfire would never have been able to replace me."

What is your worst memory?

"My brief staying in captivity was most horrifying."

PART 4: BELIEFS & OPINIONS

Are you basically optimistic or pessimistic?

"I believe I am more optimistic!"

What is your greatest fear?

"Being alone, and captive, without hopes of escaping."

What are your religious views?

"It would take much time to explain the beliefs of X'Hal to you! It is the tamaranean religion, and I am adhereing to that."

What are your political views?

"I... I do not know what you are asking here. My political views? On what?"

What are your views on sex?

Are you able to kill? Under what circumstances do you find killing to be acceptable or unacceptable?

"Yes. I do not enjoy to take a life, but if there is truly no other option for saving those that are in danger, I will not hesitate as much as I believe my friends would. But under any circumstances, and wherever possible, it should be avoided to kill someone."

In your opinion, what is the most evil thing any human being could do?

"Harming innocent children is most evil!"

Do you believe in the existence of soul mates and/or true love?

"Though I would not call it these, I believe in similar concepts, yes."

What do you believe makes a successful life?

"To be happy, to enjoy what you are doing, perhaps also to make those happy you care for."

How honest are you about your thoughts and feelings (i.e. do you hide your true self from others, and in what way)?

"It is difficult for a tamaranean to be dishonest about the feelings. It can very quickly become similar to a sickness. There are tamaraneans that still do not show what they are thinking or feeling, but I am feeling much better if I am simply being open!"

Do you have any biases or prejudices?

"Even when I am not happy about some thing, I would always do what I can to not let such connections endanger a new meeting."

Is there anything you absolutely refuse to do under any circumstances? Why do you refuse to do it?

"I would always refuse to harm my friends! Because it cannot be right to do such!"

Who or what, if anything, would you die for (or otherwise go to extremes for)?

"It is not a thought that I enjoy. But I believe me and my friends all would not hesitate to give our lives for those of the others."

PART 5: RELATIONSHIPS W/OTHERS

In general, how do you treat others (politely, rudely, by keeping them at a distance, etc.)? Does your treatment of them change depending on how well you know them, and if so, how?

"I am doing my best to treat every one politely! And I do not think that my behaviour is changing if I am knowing some one better."

Who is the most important person in your life, and why?

"All of my friends are!"

Who is the person you respect the most, and why?

"Raven! It must be very difficult to keep such a control of her emotions at all times!"

Who are your friends? Do you have a best friend? Describe these people.

"There are so many friends that I could name! My best friend is Robin! I have described him before, have I not? He is the leader of our team, and he is often willing to explain to me what I do not understand. He is very important to me!"

Do you have a spouse or significant other? If so, describe this person.

"I do not have such!"

Have you ever been in love? If so, describe what happened.

"I... Yes, there was... there was a connection that I have felt immediately as we have first met. We... We are still working on it, I believe."

What do you look for in a potential lover?

"I wish for some one who is friendly, who is there for me and who can rely on me in return. Some one that I am feeling at home and comfortable with!"

How close are you to your family?

"It... it is difficult with Blackfire, I would not call us 'close' at all. But I am very close to my baby brother, now that he has returned to us!"

Have you started your own family? If so, describe them. If not, do you want to? Why or why not?

"I have not! But I am most enjoying the idea. It is a delighting thought to picture myself having children of my own that I can care for!"

Who would you turn to if you were in desperate need of help?

"My friends, my team! The Titans!"

Do you trust anyone to protect you? Who, and why?

"I would never doubt that my friends would always protect me, as I them!"

If you died or went missing, who would miss you?

"I believe my friends and my brother would miss you! And many of my friends would attempt to find me, or find out what has happened. And Galfore certainly, as well!"

Who is the person you despise the most, and why?

"I am aware that she is merely a human, and that I need not feel as strongly towards her... but I do not like Kitten, the daughter of Killer Moth, at all."

Do you tend to argue with people, or avoid conflict?

"I do not like arguing! But if necessary, I would not avoid it."

Do you tend to take on leadership roles in social situations?

"I do not think so. But I am often talking much, so perhaps I am, and merely do not realize it?"

Do you like interacting with large groups of people? Why or why not?

"Certainly! There is an earthen saying, that it is merrier the more people are there, no? I find it very entertaining to have many friends around me!"

Do you care what others think of you?

"I am trying to lessen how much I am caring, but yes. It is most unpleasant when I am insulted."

PART 6: LIKES & DISLIKES

What is/are your favorite hobbies and pastimes?

"Exploring Earth! Oh, and I am enjoying to go shopping, or to cook or care for our Silkie!"

What is your most treasured possession?

"I... There is the 'crown' that I have worn when I came to Earth. My mother has gifted it to me shortly before we have lost her."

What is your favorite color?

"I am very fond of purple, as many of my people are. Perhaps it is simply some thing I have been raised into, as it is the most common color for clothing on Tamaran."

What is your favorite food?

"Glorg!"

What, if anything, do you like to read?

"Raven is recommending books to me some times! I am not very fast with reading them, as I have often some thing else that I am then thinking of doing, but they are most entertaining to read!"

What is your idea of good entertainment (consider music, movies, art, etc.)?

"I do not understand. Entertainment is good if it is keeping one entertained, and as the likes of such vary, it is difficult to have any entertainment that is not good!"

Do you smoke, drink, or use drugs? If so, why? Do you want to quit?

"I am not doing any of these things."

How do you spend a typical Saturday night?

"If we are not on a mission, it is often that me and my friends are making the nights of movies!"

What makes you laugh?

"There are many things that are making me laugh!"

What, if anything, shocks or offends you?

"It is not very nice when people are unfriendly to others based on how they look or which gender they are having. I am hearing bad words because of my looks and for being alien, as well. So perhaps these."

What would you do if you had insomnia and had to find something to do to amuse yourself?

"I would watch TV! There is always some thing interesting shown, no?"

How do you deal with stress?

"It is best to unleash any troubles I am having. Such includes stress. And my friends would certainly aid me in overcoming the stress."

Are you spontaneous, or do you always need to have a plan?

"I am not very good at sticking with plans."

What are your pet peeves?

"I do not understand what those are that you ask for."

PART 7: SELF IMAGES & OTHER

Describe the routine of a normal day for you. How do you feel when this routine is disrupted?

"It is often that our days are not going by routine. When trouble is coming, we are going to it as quickly as we can. It might not be pleasant, but it is necessary, so I am rarely feeling bad about it. On a routine, hmm... I am waking, I stretch and prepare myself for the breakfast. We are commonly eating together, and doing some activity for spending the day. On many days, there is also our training."

What is your greatest strength as a person?

"Perhaps that I am willing to trust others? Although my friends have also told me that it is a big weakness. Perhaps caring for the well-being of others?"

What is your greatest weakness?

"Perhaps my trusting too easily? I do not truly know."

If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?

"I would not change a thing! I am happy as I am."

Are you generally introverted or extroverted?

"Extroverted!"

Are you generally organized or messy?

"I prefer to have things look organized, but if I am too distracted, I can quickly be very messy, as well."

Name three things you consider yourself to be very good at, and three things you consider yourself to be very bad at.

"I am good at cooking! ... tamaranean dishes. My friends have before complained that I am often not following the recipes, and am creating different earthen dishes than what they expect. I am a capable fighter, and I am good at making friends!

I cannot draw well, um... I am not aware of many parts of the earthen sayings, and I am not good at recognizing when I should not be trusting or believeing someone."

Do you like yourself?

"Yes, I think I do."

What are your reasons for being an adventurer (or doing the strange and heroic things that RPG characters do)? Are your real reasons for doing this different than the ones you tell people in public? (If so, detail both sets of reasons…)

"I am a hero because it would feel wrong to not use my abilities, that are more than the average on this world, to aid others. It would feel egoistic, and I enjoy to help others."

What goal do you most want to accomplish in your lifetime?

"I do not have goals. All I am wishing for is to continue to be happy."

Where do you see yourself in 5 years?

"I hope that I am still with my friends!"

If you could choose, how would you want to die?

"Either after a long living, or if it must happen earlier... I would prefer to die in saving someone else."

If you knew you were going to die in 24 hours, name three things you would do in the time you had left.

"I would visit and hug as many of my friends as I can! I would wish to tell them again how much I value them and how their friendship has delighted me. And I certainly must spend a lot of time with Ry! If there is no more time, I must do what I can to make him understand that he is worth much more than he is thinking! ... And I also wish to say goodbye to Galfore, and perhaps leave messages for those that I am not able to reach. ... Perhaps a message for Blackfire, as well."

What is the one thing for which you would most like to be remembered after your death?

"Perhaps for the good that we are doing as heroes?"

What three words best describe your personality?

"Friendly, cheerful, and very happy to explore and learn!"

What three words would others probably use to describe you?

"I am hoping some thing similar! Although there have also been words that were not as friendly, I believe that more people would not use those mean words."

If you could, what advice would you, the player, give to your character? (You might even want to speak as if he or she were sitting right here in front of you, and use proper tone so he or she might heed your advice…)

I don't think there really is anything I'd need to give her as advice. I mean, if I really have to say something, probably something like that she should stay how she is and not change only because of some bad experiences. Something like that.

#✫ There was a young alien girl who lived in a T ✫ | About Starfire #those were quite cool! and take forever to answer xD #I tried to stay as ship-neutral as possible; but in some answers I just couldn't avoid mentioning robin #since as you all probably know I default to robstar when nothing else is implied

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foursideharmony · 3 years

Text

The Cat, the Prince, and the Doorway to Imagination (Chapter 5)

Summary: Roman confronts the other Sides.

Pairings: Platonic/familial LAMP/CALM, Platonic/familial DLAMPR

Content Warnings: Violence and threats of violence, nightmare imagery

Word Count: 3,194

Read on AO3: here

“Won't be long now,” said Mr. Beaver as the group rounded a low hill. The sun was just starting to sink, and the resulting shadow made them all the colder. They had been on the move for nearly twenty hours, with only brief and infrequent rest stops, and had long since begun dragging their feet. Their trail made a continuous ragged line through the snow.

“I can't feel my anything,” Patton moaned.

“Well if nothing else,” said Mrs. Beaver, trudging alongside him and patting his hand, “they'll at least have decent campfires where we're going.”

Another twenty-five or so minutes brought them around the base of that hill and the next one, and then the Beavers led the group up the slope of a third and tallest hill. “And here we are,” said Mr. Beaver once they reached the summit. “The hill of the Stone Table.”

The hilltop was a broad space, clear of trees, with a grim gray construction in the very center: the Stone Table itself. It seemed like the whole snowscape of Narnia spread out before them, all the way to the twinkling ocean. It would have been a lovely view if not for the circumstances that had brought them there.

No one greeted them. They thought at first that no one was even there, but Virgil pointed to a hunched figure crouched on the ground some distance away from the table, tending the embers of a small fire by means of an awkwardly long poker held at full arm's length, as if she were afraid to go too near it. She was very slender, with lightly tanned skin and misty pale green hair that stuck out from her head in bristly locks, falling down to merge with her dress, which was the same color and texture.

“Ailim, is that you?” said Mr. Beaver.

“Oh!” said the woman, rising to her feet in one motion, more gracefully than any human could manage. “Beaver...I wasn't expecting you.”

“Ailim...where is everyone?”

She shook her head with a sound like leaves rustling in a breeze. “A few are nearby, keeping to cover. As for the rest...they are safe in their homes. Where else would they be? Aslan has not come after all. Of my people, only my conifer siblings and myself are even awake. The rest of our cousins still sleep.”

“Ailim is a dryad,” Mrs. Beaver explained. “That's the spirit of a tree. In her case, a fir tree.”

“And you must be the humans of the prophecy,” said Ailim. “Do you know why Aslan has not returned?”

“B-beats me, Miss,” Patton said, teeth chattering. “The story seems to have hopped off the rails at some point.”

“Oh, how rude of me not to notice how cold you are. Do come sit by the fire. She crouched to poke up the flames, and used an equally long-handled set of tongs to add another log. Soon it was crackling nicely, and the Sides were clustered around it, sitting on small boulders that had been cleared of snow and soaking up the warmth.

“It doesn't bother you?” Virgil said as Ailim fed the fire again. “Burning wood? I mean, if you're a tree too...”

“This was all fallen and dead already when it was gathered,” she explained. “No Narnian of good heart would ever cut down a living tree, or even take so much as a single branch. Sometimes an aged dryad who knows she will die soon will bequeath her wood to those who need it, but living trees are sacrosanct. Or,” she added sadly, “so it was before the White Witch came.”

“We'll figure something out,” Patton said. “I think…I think the Witch is hurting someone we care about too.”

“In the meantime,” Mr. Beaver cut in, “this lot needs food and rest.”

“Of course,” said the dryad. “There are shelters in the thickets on the southeastern slope, and provisions. Tap three times quickly and twice slowly on the large boulder and the fauns will let you inside.” She met each of their gazes in turn. “In the morning we must hold a council of war.”

*******************************************

At least Jadis's bed was comfortable enough.

Roman had found it eventually, after wandering the frozen castle for what felt like hours. It was only a broad, thick slab of ice on the floor, but it was heaped with enough blankets and furs that he was adequately shielded from the worst of the cold, both from the frigid air of the castle and the bed itself. He crawled in, his head still spinning, and wrapped himself in layers of bedding like a caterpillar forming its cocoon.

Sleep came quickly, but proper rest did not; Roman's dreams were full of ice and crystal and stone and snowflakes that came spinning down out of a black sky like tiny sawmill blades. Where they touched him he flinched and bled, and his blood was the pale turquoise of a glacial core. It whispered to him in sounds that were almost words and phrases in a language he only partially understood.

Perhaps he thrashed or cried out in his sleep, but if so, no one noticed or responded.

And with the coming of the dawn, Roman opened his eyes...and knew who he was. And what he was.

*******************************************

The war council never happened.

After their long trek, the Sides had just enough energy left to swallow a few mouthfuls of the stew the fauns had prepared and fall asleep on rough cots in a den of sorts excavated from the hillside. The Narnians hadn't the heart to disturb them, and they didn't wake until the sun was well over the horizon, and then only because a strange, piercing sound was blaring from outside the shelter, coming from some distance away. It was like a horn, but shriller, and it set their teeth on edge.

Bleary-eyed from stolen sleep, they bustled out to find their hosts interrupted in the act of preparing breakfast. “What's going on?” Patton yawned. “Is it time for the council meeting thingie?”

“We're not sure,” said one of the fauns, whose name escaped him. The peculiar sound continued at intervals of a few seconds, and seemed intended as a signal of some kind.

“Something is approaching!” came Ailim’s voice from the hilltop. “Let us all gather as a show of our numbers!”

“What numbers,” Virgil muttered, but he joined the other two, and the Beavers and fauns and other handful of Narnian citizens now emerging from their respective shelters, in hiking back up to the summit, where Ailim was waiting with another dryad, taller and wirier than herself. They got there just in time to see, bursting through the trees on the northern slope, a Dwarf they barely recognized as the White Witch’s driver. He was blowing on some kind of wind instrument that appeared to be made from silvery crystal—or perhaps ice—which was of course the sound they had all been hearing. Behind him, further downslope, there was some kind of commotion that wasn’t yet visible through the brush and piled snow.

“Narnians!” bellowed the Dwarf. “Make ready to receive your most exalted ruler, the White Warlock!”

“What?” Virgil growled.

“White Warlock?” said Patton. “No, it’s supposed to be the White Witch. A scary lady! I remember that part!”

“'Warlock' is a semi-archaic term for a male witch,” Logan observed.

“Guys, I have the worst feeling about this…” said Virgil.

More creatures were emerging from the trees on the hill slope, and it took the Sides a moment to realize that they were looking at a procession of monsters. First was a group of Goblin heralds carrying gonfalons that seemed to consist only of crosspieces crusted with masses of icicles. Then came a formation of Dwarf archers, and then several Ogres bearing clubs. Following this were a few Hags, hissing and pointing threateningly into the gathering.

(“What is this, the whole bloody entourage?” whispered Mr. Beaver. “Dear! Mind your language!” Mrs. Beaver retorted.)

As the procession reached the hilltop, it broke to its right, circling the space counterclockwise and fanning out along the other side of the Stone Table from the Sides and their allies, effectively corralling them—they could retreat, technically, but there was only one direction available; they would be easy pickings if they tried.

Finally, the White Warlock himself appeared, lounging in a fur-lined sedan chair on the shoulders of four massive Minotaurs. His crown glittered as he moved in and out of patches of shade and his robe was made entirely of ermine, with a train that trailed behind the chair for ten yards, held off the ground by a team of Yew-dryads, their short shaggy hair speckled with scarlet berries. The Minotaurs crested the hill, and one of them kicked snow over the smoldering campfire, extinguishing it. They eased the chair down, and the Warlock rose from his seat, stepped lightly to the ground, and turned to face them.

It was Roman...and he was wrong.

They knew what “evil Roman” was supposed to look like. The fans loved to imagine him, for some reason, and they tagged Thomas in their fanart of the concept often enough that the Sides were familiar with the consensus image: the haughty expression, the gaudy gold crown studded with rubies, and especially the transformation of his suit from pristine, heroic white to Disney Villain black.

It wasn't...it wasn't supposed to become even whiter. It wasn't supposed to gleam almost too bright to look at in the sunlight, so that even the ermine barely looked white by comparison. The gold braid wasn't supposed to be replaced with silver, nor the noble red of his sash with a dusky grayish mauve like dried rose petals under a veneer of frost. The crown was not supposed to be made of silvery ice, with only a single huge diamond set under the central point.

His hair was not supposed to be shot through with white strands that turned out, upon closer inspection, to be ornamentation of impossibly delicate ice filigree. His eyes were definitely not supposed to be gray, flecked with blue-green. And he was not supposed to be pale, but he was—paler than Virgil, if such a thing were possible, lacking even a cold-induced blush to his cheeks, yet without looking the least bit unhealthy. It was as if he had been molded out of ivory.

The only hint of warmth in his appearance was that diamond, which flashed all the colors of fire.

He was wrong.

“Hark! You are all guilty of high treason against the Crown!” he said without preamble, and his voice at least, if not the disdainful tone, was familiar. “Except you three,” he added with a curt nod at his fellow Sides. “However! We are in a lenient mood! Abandon your rebellion at once, and swear fealty to us, and you will not be punished...this time. As for you...” He addressed the Sides again, and for just a moment, his cold arrogance retreated, “...in exchange for your fealty, I will make you all lesser Kings in my court. Think of it! This glorious winter kingdom could belong to all of us!”

The Narnians shuffled on their feet, making no reply. The Sides traded glances, Logan frowning uncertainly and Virgil shaking his head with a haunted expression. Finally, Patton spoke.

“Roman...this isn't fun anymore, with you acting like this. This isn't how you said the story was going to go. Can we just...go home? We can talk out whatever's bothering you.”

It was shocking how quickly Roman's eyes hardened. “I will not be mocked,” he said, low and dangerous. “You have one day and night to change your minds...or else prepare for war. And these—” he made an expansive gesture at the creatures he had brought with him, “—are merely the outermost tip of my armies.” He returned to his sedan chair and the Minotaurs hoisted it up. The procession began to descend the hill.

“Down with the White Warlock!” blurted the taller Dryad, Ailim's companion. “Aslan is King!”

Roman's head whipped around to glare at her. Without a single word, he nodded to the nearest of the Hags, and she lunged at the Dryad, shrieking and making a throwing gesture. There was something like a flash of light in reverse—a flash of darkness—and the tall tree-spirit sank to the ground with a sigh.

“Muricata!” Ailim cried as one of the Ogres stepped forward and lifted the fallen nymph in one massive hand.

“Find her tree,” growled the White Warlock. “Cut it down while she watches.”

“No! Please!” Ailim begged. “She is my sister!”

“Take the other one as well. Let them both watch.” A second Ogre seized Ailim and began dragging her along while she screamed in terror and grief.

“Roman!” Patton gasped. “H-how could you?”

“Don't make me punish you as well!” Roman snarled. “Move out!”

The procession withdrew back down the hill, leaving the Narnians devastated and the Sides both bewildered and appalled. “So now what?” Virgil said, pacing erratically and pulling at his hair. “This is really bad, you guys. Super bad. We're not just talking rail-jumping here. Roman's taken a flying leap off...off something, I don't know, but there is something wrong with him. I thought maybe he was just throwing a surprise twist at us, but did you see him? That look in his eyes? This is so bad—”

“Virgil, you are spiraling,” said Logan. “Try one of your breathing exercises.”

“I don't understand,” said Patton. “Why would Roman go this far? Do you think he's mad at us for something?”

“It is possible,” said Logan. “He has undergone a number of upsetting occurrences recently, and his mood has not been the most stable. Then again, with his talk of 'swearing fealty'...perhaps he is simply craving validation.”

“Should we just give it to him then?” said Virgil. I mean if it's the fastest way to get him off the crazy train...”

“Unfortunately, I have to advise against indulging him in this,” said Logan. “While it may work in the short term to, as you say, 'get him off the crazy train'—which does not sound like a practical or enjoyable means of transportation, by the way—the likely long-term effect would be to encourage him to continue these destructive methods of addressing his self-esteem deficits.”

“Patton, you're the 'should' guy around here...what should we do?”

“I'm honestly thinking we should just leave. The best way to send a message that the game is no good, is to quit playing. He can grapple with his feelings as long as he needs to, and we'll be there for him when he's ready to come out and talk.”

“I would tend to agree,” said Logan, “but I doubt there is any way for us to leave the Imagination without Roman noticing, and in his current state he would be certain to take steps to stop us, possibly violently.” He began to pace rapidly, wearing a tamped-down groove in the snow. “However...perhaps one of us could make it back to the door undetected, leave, and come back with...additional resources.”

“What kind of 'additional resources' did you have in mind?” said Virgil.

“It occurs to me,” Logan said, still pacing, “that Roman is rather...comfortable, with the three of us. That may cause him to take our points of view for granted, which ironically makes him less likely to listen to us than to someone with whom he might experience more interpersonal friction.”

There was a beat while Virgil and Patton took that in. “Oh, no!” Virgil said after a moment. “If you're suggesting what I think you're suggesting, then...no. I can't agree with that.”

“Just so we're on the same page,” Patton said carefully, “you want to go get Janus? You think he could help?”

“I think his presence might shock Roman just enough to shake him out of his assumptions about how this story is meant to go,” Logan explained.

“You could be right,” said Patton. “Roman arranged all this because he hasn't felt much like a hero ever since we started including Janus in our discussions. But somehow he wound up going completely the other way, to being the villain. Maybe seeing Janus will remind him of what he's trying to avoid?”

“Okay, cool, so I'm outvoted. Coolcoolcoolcoolcoolcool. So which one of us should go?”

“I was planning on doing it myself,” said Logan. “It would not be fair to ask you to carry out a plan to which you object, and between myself and Patton, I believe I have a greater chance of making the trek without getting sidetracked or losing my nerve. No offense, Patton.”

“None taken. It's an awfully long way to go by yourself, though. Are you sure you even know the way?”

“I have an excellent head for navigation and I believe I can triangulate the location of the door based on our travels thus far. I would feel more confident if I had some form of transportation, however.”

“I can carry you, sir,” said a deep but young-sounding voice from among the Narnians. It was the largest of those gathered, a Talking Bear not quite full grown but undeniably burly and powerful. “Name of Stoutpaws, sir. I'm not as good as a Horse but I'll do my best.”

“It is a pleasure to meet you, Stoutpaws. My name is Logan. If we start now, I estimate you can get me to my destination before sundown.”

“You're leaving already?” Patton said, fretting.

“Roman has only given us until tomorrow, Patton. Given the round trip, I need to use every minute I can to make sure I bring Janus back here before the deadline.”

Patton strode up and pulled him into a hug. “You be careful.”

“Likewise,” said Logan.

“I'll guard him with my life, sir,” said Stoutpaws. He crouched on all fours so that Logan could climb onto his back and then loped away down the westward slope of the hill.

“Gosh, things are happening fast,” Patton said, watching them go. “It all started so simply.”

“Come on, Pat,” said Virgil with a lopsided smile that got nowhere near his eyes, “you should know by now that nothing in this mind of Thomas's is ever simple. And on that note...we should probably pull this bunch together and come up with some contingency plans, just in case Logan doesn't get back in time.”

“Yeah,” Patton agreed noncommittally. “And someone oughta buck them up. They just watched two of their own get dragged away by the bad guys to be...” He trailed off.

“Don't think about it too much,” Virgil said. “Just...yeah, don't think about it.” The gathering was breaking up, the Narnians returning dejected to their hillside shelters. Patton and Virgil joined them.

Unseen in the snow-dusted brush nearby, someone was watching...

#sanders sides #fanfiction #lamp/calm #Platonic LAMP/CALM #dlampr #platonic dlampr #narnia #sympathetic janus #sympathetic remus #villainous roman

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bluerosesburnblue · 4 years

Photo

You know what it’s always a good time for?

Dwyn Sibling Angst

(This one’s a big one so I’m putting the explanation under the cut)

So who remembers the Patronus sidequest?

Way, way back when I posted that first ever bio of Jacob and Seren I made brief mention of Patronuses, namely what theirs would be and the fact that Seren would not be able to cast it unless Jacob was found alive. I later made brief mention that I’d finalized the Patronuses to a Sea Lion for Jacob and a Common Seal for Seren, but I never actually elaborated on why Seren would have trouble with the spell

That’s because I started this stupid, elaborate project back when the quest came out and just never finished it, so here we go. Let’s finally talk about Seren’s Patronus issues

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I have this tendency when applying sidequests to Seren to just make up my own timeline that’s completely divorced from both what year the quest claims it takes place in and what year I actually ended up playing it in. In the case of Unleash Your Patronus, I actually do put it in Year 4 like the game suggests and not Year 5 when I played it

The Patronus Charm, as far as we know, has three requirements: strong magical skill, a “worthy” heart, and the ability to muster up and sustain a happy memory

Pass, pass, hard fail

Seren is not a happy person. I wouldn’t even say she’s a positive person. If it looks like she’s being positive, it is almost always performative to try and ease someone else’s nerves. This girl is a giant ball of nerves that gets angstier and more traumatized every year and she cannot shut her emotions off. Not that she can’t be happy, she can, but it’s far from her default state since the anxiety tends to run through worst case scenarios all the time

Complicating things is that her happiest memories are all things involving Jacob, who is decidedly not there. The reason I set this in Year 4 is because we don’t even have the Forest Vault message that he’s in the next Vault yet. He could legitimately be dead for all anyone knows in Year 4. So positive memories are of Jacob which, oops, reminds her that he’s still gone. Which then triggers the worst case scenario machine that is her brain

So, alright, let’s assume that Seren manages to shove that down. She’s just focusing on the memory, maybe even repeating “I’m gonna find him and we’re gonna do that thing from our childhoods again” to keep from getting distracted. Cue the actual form of Seren’s Patronus

I picked the Common Seal and Sea Lion for the Dwyns for a variety of reasons. I was already giving them the same Animagus form, figured I’d switch it up for the Patronuses. Make them “related” and symbolizing similar things, but not the same (also reference that merperson heritage). I’ve also always been a fan of the idea that sometimes particularly strong memories can shape the Patronus thanks to the fact that sometimes people with an obsession with an animal have their Patronuses take that form, and then there’s this quote:

"[...] the Patronus often mutates to take the image of the love of one's life (because they so often become the 'happy thought' that generates a Patronus)."

And now we have the earliest memory Seren has. She’s three years old and Jacob’s eight. They go to the aquarium. It’s one of the few times they’ve ever gone out somewhere as a family and she’s just completely enamored with the whole thing. She really falls in love with how cute and graceful the seals are, to the point where she spends part of the trip after they’ve moved closer to the gift shop camped out with the seal plushies just... looking at ‘em. Jacob notices and convinces their parents to buy her one. It’s her absolute favorite toy as a kid, and one of the few things she brings to Hogwarts every year, without fail

It’s not a memory she thinks of much. It wasn’t even the memory she was using to call forth her Patronus, despite being her first happy memory. And yet, there it is, played out in front of her in a brilliant light show. This time, though, Jacob isn’t there. Fighting down the instinct to whirl around and show it to him is just another reminder that he hasn’t been found yet and may never be and what if he isn’t-

-and it’s gone.

So even if Seren manages to fight through her natural tendency to make everything worse in her head, what her Patronus looks like will just send her spiraling right back into it. And once she sees it the first time - that’s it. Now she knows what her Patronus is and dreads seeing it again so much that she can’t focus on anything else when casting it. A dread that’s strong enough that she wouldn’t be able to muster up even an incorporeal Patronus

That’s why she just can’t cast a Patronus unless Jacob’s found alive, and mentally sound, and noooooot evil

If the Vault situation isn’t resolved with a happy ending, that’s all permanent. Jacob’s evil, Jacob dies, whatever, that’s an automatic no Patronus at all. If that incident from Year 6 Chapter 18 is real and permanent but Jacob’s fine, that gives her the most inconsistent incorporeal Patronus at best and the only reason it can manifest at all is because it’s form has no ties to the spoiler character so the dread factor is gone

The best timeline will probably result in Seren being able to cast an incorporeal Patronus consistently, a corporeal Patronus fairly consistently in low-pressure scenarios, and managing to find a workaround regarding a corporeal Patronus by having Jacob just send his most terrible jokes at her via Legilimency in high-pressure situations. Even in the best case scenario, she still struggles with maintaining positivity and is riding solely on her support network

I let her become an Animagus at age 15, I had to give her some weaknesses. (Relatedly, she also struggles with Riddikulus and can only perform it consistently due to intense practice thanks to the Vault of Fear)

------------

Furthermore, Jacob and Seren’s Patronuses are what they are because:

Seals and Sea Lions tend to get shoved together when searching for symbolism. A Patronus represents the “hidden inner self” that is called forth in times of need. So then I have to come up with something that can represent both Jacob and Seren, but being just different enough to represent the nuances between their personalities.

Common traits associated with them are playfulness (more overt with Jacob, but Seren is still mischievous and can be goofy), creativity/big imagination (extremely applicable to both of them), adaptability (which goes hand-in-hand with their creative aspects), faith (normally self-faith. Seren lacks it so perhaps this symbolizes what she needs to develop. Both have faith in others), independence, and balance (with the two finding balance with each other, losing it, then regaining it later in life)

To separate them I looked at behavior. Seren gets the Common Seal due to their quiet nature and tendency to remain largely solitary. The introverted one

Jacob gets the Sea Lion because they’re LOUD and DON’T EVER STOP BEING LOUD and prefer being in larger groups. The (somewhat more) extroverted one

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Finally, here’s the still .png for the key frame in the .gif with the Patronus in it because I liked it a lot

And there it is. The big Patronus explanation writeup. I’m so glad it’s done

I started this damn thing after I finished the Patronus quest. Like, the day after or even the day of. And then I stopped for some reason! And then a few months ago I was like “hey, that was almost done and Dementors are coming back into the story, why not finish it?” Didn’t get it done in time for that update. And then that update was Year 6 Chapter 18 and I lost all motivation I had

So here! Fine! Happy one year and one day anniversary of when the Patronus sidequest came out!

Now please take this thing out of my sight

#harry potter series #harry potter hogwarts mystery #hogwarts mystery #hphm #jacob's sibling #seren dwyn #liz art #in case anyone scrolls too fast there's a gif in there

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kangaracharacha · 3 years

Note

Imogen and all the OC asks

What is/are your OC’s nickname(s) and how did it come about? ‘sparrow’, because she turned up with hawkeye and a sparrow is a little shitty hawk and tony stark thinks he’s funny

What is the color of your OC’s eyes/hair/skin? blue, blonde, white.

How tall is your OC? not very tall. very short. probably like 5′-ish.

What is a noticeable physical attribute of your OC? there’s a long, ugly scar on the inside of her collarbone. otherwise, the general bad attitude mixed with the height is. amusing.

What does your OC normally wear? What would your OC wear on a special night? comfortable, practical clothing. dull colours, generic brands, doesn’t mind much what she looks like. for a special occasion, she’d dress down, but appropriate to the occasion.

What is one word you would use to describe your OC’s appearances? angry

Does your OC have any markings, such as a birthmark or a scar? scar on her collarbone.

How does your OC talk/what does your OC’s voice sound like? I’m honestly struggling here. It’s just normal. Just a normal voice. Good at shouting. Very loud. Usually angry.

What does your OC’s bedroom look like? His/her living area? kind of messy but like, organised chaos. she’s not really a chore-doer, yknow, she’s busy doing other stuff and she mostly lives alone so it doesn’t bother her or anyone else. it’s not really out of control or anything. apart from her clothes and stuff, she doesn’t really have her own space; in new york, she lives in clint’s apartment, an old, small space in an outdated building with second-hand furniture and a bunch of clint’s crap still sitting around, and if she has a place in sokovia it’s temporary housing and doubles as an office, so in the grand scheme of things she doesn’t really have a huge impact on the spaces she occupies while she’s there.

What does your OC keep in a special drawer? as sad as it is, nothing, she doesn’t really have a lot of possessions, definitely not special ones; the only things she brought with her from SHIELD were a bag of clothes, a knife, a gun, and a toothbrush, and since then she hasn’t quite settled enough to start collecting things - and living most of her life so far without a lot of stuff is just a hard habit to break.

What is your OC’s relationship with his/her mother? the evil scientist? she’s not a huge fan. kind of resents her like, a lot. imogen doesn’t remember anything about her except what other people have told her and the things she’s found out about herself, so she’s kind of just a stranger that set her up for a lifetime of frustrations.

What is your OC’s relationship with his/her father? nevr knew him, has like one vague memory of him being kind of nice, but in the end he was evil so she’s not really searching for any way to keep his memory alive.

How many siblings does your OC and what is his/her relationship with them? hah. she has one brother. having cut herself loose of that tie, she’s recently realised that that relationship was some kinda toxic and also he wasn’t afraid to kill her when ordered to so. you could say she’s not really interested in seeing him again either.

Who is the mother and/or father figure in your OC’s life? she’s a bit over parental figures and a bit too old for that kind of bond at this point in her life, but she does have a couple of ‘mentors’, people that she can rely on to point her in the right direction. clint barton is one, of course, you always have to have a good friend who can knock you out and tell you ‘hey maybe being on team hydra isn’t like, the most morally sound decision you could make’. pepper potts is a professional rolemodel she’s found she can look up to. she lowkey thinks she could be like pepper someday but she’ll never admit that ‘CEO’ sounds like a good job to her. and shoutout to Agent Donoghue, whose name i had to look up because he’s in sparrow for a whole five seconds but. she feels really bad about this one. Donoghue was her last chance at SHIELD, he gave her every chance to be successful in that line of work and he really was a good mentor, she just wasn’t ready to change when they knew each other. she looks back on a lot of the things he said these days and regrets not listening sooner, just like she regrets how it ended...but things had to happen the way they did for her to want to grow and become a better person.

What was your OC’s childhood like? crap, mostly. well, it was fine in a way, but. her parents died when she was five and she almost died too but that wiped most of the memory out of her head at least. she was adopted by a neighbour who was actually just a hydra agent on a longcon mission to keep an eye on her, more because she was possibly useful for information on her parents than out of any concern. this didn’t really lead to a loving household to grow up in, and her brother, who is five (or maybe seven?) years older than her didn’t spend much time around the place, and got himself admitted to the SHIELD academy as soon as he could. she didn’t really deal with this whole situation very well, so she grew up struggling in school, getting into fights, constantly grounded and yet impossible to control. eventually, her brother managed to get her an admission into the academy as well, where she found some structure at least but wasn’t particularly well liked and was typically bottom of the class, problem student, one step away from being thrown out.

What is your OC’s strongest childhood memory? Why and how as that impacted him/her? she sort of remembers the murder of her parents, sort of, but it doesn’t really hit her the way she thinks it probably should? it’s just there in the back of her brain, blurry and disjointed and she’s not sure how much of it she’s made up and how much she’s actually remembering, and it doesn’t really impact her all that much although it probably did as a young child. otherwise, the day that her brother, will, left for the academy. she has a whole lifetime of memories of people failing her, but that was the first time that he failed her, and though she didn’t realise it at the time, it was the final straw for her as a kid; she only closed off after that, gave up on people and on school and whatever else she was dreaming about. looking back now, she realises that she should have held on to that betrayal instead of eventually forgiving him, because that was her first red flag that he wasn’t as focused on her wellbeing as she thought he was.

What is your OC’s imagination like? not very good, she’s a very impulsive and in-the-moment kind of person, and a pragmatic and logical thinker who doesn’t leave much room for fanciful dreaming or thinking very far outside the box.

How many times did your OC move as a child? Which area was his/her favorite? she spent most of her childhood in new york, shifting house a couple of times but otherwise in the same area, attending the same school, etc. they all sucked, honestly; her favourite place was her parent’s house. or it would be if she could remember it.

What does your OC think of children- either in general or about having them? she used to have no tolerance for kids but she’s warming up to them slowly, the further she gets from being a loudmouthed, hotheaded teenager. she would have kids one day, but not for a while yet, but more because she’s just too busy and not settled in one place at all than because she doesn’t like them.

What kind of mother/father would your OC be? she’d be dedicated to being a good mother, and to settling down and living a life that is right for her kids. she wouldn’t be the perfect parent, she knows nothing about parenting and has never had one of her own in her life, but she would try her best. she might even learn patience.

Who are your OC’s closest relatives? none of her relatives are close. she doesn’t know any of her distant family, most of them are dead anyway, and her brother is the worst person ever, so she’d just like them all to stay very far away, thankyou.

Who is/are your OC’s closest friend(s)? she has a couple of good friends in sokovia, katja and sofia and vinn (but they are all ocs and so you’ll have to send me another ask to know more about them). clint and the maximoffs are her closest friends in the avengers circle of people, and i guess ruby (radford, hacker extraordinaire and Legally Dead) also counts as a close friend, if grudgingly.

Who are the people your OC surrounds him/herself with? people that challenge her, and people that have earned her respect, which she doesn’t give away freely. she likes to be pushed, whether in her skills or her wit or just as a person, and she has an acute sense of when people don’t really like her company - which is fine, she knows she has a personality that is grating to some people, but she would prefer that they just didn’t come near her if that’s the case.

Who are the people your OC dislikes/hates? people that she feels are working against what she thinks is right. usually, this is groups of people - hydra, intel, certain rebel groups and militias in sokovia. otherwise, there are plenty of people that rub her the wrong way day to day, but she doesn’t really spend time actively hating them, she’ll just either get into a fight with them or avoid them as much as she can.

If your OC has a soulmate, who is it? (pietro, but don’t tell her)

Why does your OC and his/her soulmate work so well together? they’re both people that grew up lost and overlooked and angry at the world, and they were both manipulated by hydra and used and tossed aside by them, so they find common ground in that, even if it was on very different scales. they also tend to run in the same sort of circles as well - they find friends in the same people, their goals often align - but their personalities are different enough that they don’t just piss each other off. they share the same humour and the same brutal honesty and strong sense of right and wrong - they’re not afraid to call each other out, or argue, and they’re learning to apologise and forgive together. most importantly, they make the choice to be there for each other and to live new lives, and they stick to it. they both have an idea of who they want to be in the future, and both have the other in that vision.

What are some things your OC admires about his/her soulmate? she admires his commitment to his cause, how much he cares about his country and his friends and family and the responsibility he puts on himself to fix it. also, that he could put up with her for so long, without complaint; she’s always been used to people getting tired of her or taking off (or trying to kill her but we’re not going to talk about that), and she wasn’t really sure anyone could stand to be around her and still care about her for so long.

How did your OC and his/her soulmate meet? auntie stark playing matchmaker at a party because he was bored and he’s a meddler and they both annoy him in the same way.

What is your OC’s level of education? high school dropout and SHIELD academy dropout with no formal education, but she’s competent enough to get by in basic skills like maths and SHIELD related things like fighting and espionage.

Did your OC participate in extracurricular activities, and if so, what were they? is detention considered an extracurricular activity

What is your OC’s opinion of school? What kind of student was s/he? school was a very negative experience. she hated every minute of it. she was that really annoying, disruptive kid that would physically square up to anyone who even looked at her funny and regularly punched people and things, yknow? bad grades, bad attitude, no friends, given up on a long time ago.

What subjects did your OC excel at? sports weren’t terrible, as long as they weren’t team sports. once she got to the academy, hand to hand combat was her best subject, except that she was used to fighting dirty and already too set against the system to sit down and learn proper technique.

What subjects interested your OC? nothing at school really interested her; all of her interests have really come to her in her 20s, when she’s free to discover them on her own.

What is your OC’s dream job and/or current profession? throughout the three fics about her, she’s a shield/hydra agent, a security officer at Stark Industries, and the director of the SRF camp in Nova Grad, Sokovia. she’s still figuring out where this is leading her, but the last two jobs have been perfect for her at that stage in her life.

How is your OC working towards his/her dream job and/or achieved his/her current profession? she’s been lucky enough to fall into each of her professions so far, which she is all too aware of and works hard to prove that she deserves it. her brother got her a place in SHIELD training, Clint helped organise the job at Stark Industries and called in a few favours so that she would get it, and she took over the SRF camp temporarily after an incident with the former director. she’s most proud of her work at the latter, and she’ll try to continue in that role until something else pulls her away.

What are your OC’s thoughts/opinions of his/her current profession? she enjoyed working at SI well enough, the job was within her skill level, the people were okay, she was comfortable. she could have easily stayed there for a lot longer if other opportunities hadn’t presented themselves. she loves running the SRF camp, it’s just the right amount of challenging and a little bit dangerous but not too dangerous, and even if it’s a lot of paperwork there’s also something new and crazy happening every day to keep it fresh.

What is your OC’s biggest dream? to find a place to fit into and live a life where she’s making her own decisions, outside of the control of other people.

How does your OC react to and handle stress? she gets short and snappy with people, doesn’t have time for stupid or time wasting, can get pretty heated but doesn’t often get overwhelmed, she’s still got a handle on the situation.

How does your OC handle anger? loudly. she will physically fight people, if she’s riled up enough, but she’s trying to curb that habit.

How does your OC handle grief? processes inwardly, and puts on a brave face outwardly. very few people would see her express grief, and it would take a few weeks for it to really hit her like that.

What is your OC’s greatest fear? losing everything she’s worked hard to get in the last few years.

What makes your OC happy? uninterrupted downtime, when she can just do what she wants. it’s a simple life. oh, and people getting what they deserve. it’s satisfying.

What kind of sense of humor does your OC have? sarcastic, dry remarks, and finding humour in other people’s misfortune.

What are some things that greatly upset your OC? being disregarded as stupid or useless or annoying, situations in which she’s helpless or too far out of her depth to catch up

What are some things that annoy your OC? people that can’t keep up with her or say dumb shit, people in general, irritating noises

If your OC has them, what are some regrets s/he has? she regrets not trying harder in school or the academy, she feels like those years were mostly wasted and wishes they hadn’t been even though she knows it’s not something to blame herself for. she regrets killing donoghue too; in the moment, it was all she could do, and what she had to do to survive, but it goes so against her morals that she’ll always feel guilty about it.

How easily does your OC forgive? not very. she’s been let down a lot in the past, and she’s cutthroat about removing people from her life when she thinks that they’re dragging her down.

What are some of your OC’s vices? pride, wrath, anger, impatience, unkindness, spite

If your OC experienced trauma, what was it? the death of her parents. during flicker, she struggles with the knowledge that she has killed and seriously injured people before, and with knowing that she’s done these things while trying to learn how to live a normal life. in swift, sokovia offers her a very immediate and major seachange; she has to live through bombings, violent riots, shootings, etc. I think the most rattling out of these for her is having to play dead on a street filled with the dead, not knowing if her friends are alive or if she is going to live through this. up until swift, she doesn’t really see the worst that groups like hydra can do; she sees the blood and the death and the injustice of soldiers running blindly in to die, but this incident really hits home for her that she’s putting herself in the way of bad, terrifying people, and the things they are capable of are scary.

What secrets does your OC have? she used to be a hydra agent. she’s open about it if she has to be, if someone finds this information out themselves she’s very upfront and will tell them the whole story and let them make their own decision, but she’ll keep it secret until that time, she’ll never be the one they hear it from.

What are some of your OC’s morals? usually her choices come down to just basic human decency, sadly; she believes people should be free to make their own choices and to live their own lives, safe and in peace. in the scope of swift, she wants the people of sokovia to be able to retain their country under their own control, she doesn’t believe that the invaders and the rising militia should be involved, and that they should be free to choose their own government, but she doesn’t really think that riots and bombs are the way to go about it.

What are some of your OC’s motivations? her own drive to be better than she has been in the past, to make up for the time she’d spent with hydra (even if the things she’d actively done for them were minimal), to find her way in the world and the place she’s meant to occupy.

What is the health of your OC? it’s good. lots of scars, the regular kind of aches and pains from living a very active lifestyle. as of swift, she has restricted movement in her shoulder from a bullet wound - not enough to really bother her day-to-day, but she’s given up archery since recovering.

Does your OC think with his/her head or heart? with her head

What are your OC’s thoughts on death? she hasn’t really come to terms with death yet - it’s a scary concept, and she’s young. mostly, she just tries not to think about it at all, even when it’s staring her right in the face. she could probably find peace with it when it happens, if it’s for the right cause.

What are some of your OC’s strengths? she’s willful, determined, brave, she can speak her mind when she needs to and she’s not afraid to tell people what she thinks or to fight for a change. she’s open to change herself, and she’s willing to learn, where she wasn’t in the past.

What are some of your OC’s weaknesses? she’s quick to anger and slow to forgive, she often picks a fight that she should refrain from and can easily hurt the ones she loves. she’s closed off and that turns away many people and loses her many opportunities. she has a negative mindset and low self-worth; she makes life harder for herself often.

How does your OC take criticism? not well. she’ll get angry and start an argument or storm off, and take a few hours or days to process. it depends who is offering her criticism as to whether she’ll come crawling back to apologise or if her pride will be too much to allow her to do that.

What does your OC think of him/herself? she doesn’t think very highly of herself. she’s acutely aware of her faults - that she’s too angry and hardheaded, that she doesn’t listen enough and isn’t particularly talented at anything.

If your OC could change one thing about him/herself, what would it be? some days, she would say that she would change her whole personality, take out the anger or whatever it is that makes it so hard for her to sit down and listen, or forget her whole past. other days, she wouldn’t want to change anything at all, even though she’s a whole mess. she really wants the latter to be her answer, but she’s still learning to be okay with herself.

What is the general impression your OC gives other people? standoffish, strong personality bordering on rude, takes no shit, short-tempered, unfriendly.

How emotionally/mentally vulnerable is your OC with other people? on a scale of zero to ten, i’d give her a solid one. she’s closed off, pragmatic, and thinks she has to do everything alone. close friends might get more out of her, and she’s learning to be softer and more open, and to work with other people, but for the most part she isn’t giving anything away.

How does your OC display love? sarcasm, mostly. she doesn’t outwardly express it, really, especially in public, but she’s always there as support or to listen or offer advice, if she can. and she’s always trying to do better and to commit herself to the relationship, even if she doesn’t make a big show of it.

What are some habits your OC has picked up? clint’s coffee addiction has rubbed off on her.

What is your OC’s favorite drink? it’s quickly becoming coffee

What is your OC’s favorite food? doritos

What is your OC’s favorite sweet? chocolate

What is your OC’s favorite season? autumn

What is your OC’s favorite kind of weather? sunny, but not too sunny

What is your OC’s favorite book? she doesn’t really read

What is your OC’s favorite movie and/or TV show? dog cops, she used to hate it but now she’s too invested to quit, shrek is her like, go-to movie when there’s nothing else which is weird and she’ll never admit it. but true.

What is your OC’s favorite kind of music (and song if there is one)? she listens to a whole bunch of different music, but her main genres would be pop, rock, rnb

What is your OC’s favorite form of entertainment? TV/movies

What is your OC’s favorite color? blue

What is your OC’s favorite scent? salty sea air on a strong breeze. it’s just so crisp.

What is your OC’s favorite animal? she wasn’t a dog person until she met clint’s dogs. now she’s totally a dog person.

What is your OC’s favorite sound? s i l e n c e on a sunday morning.

What is your OC’s favorite time of day? morning, once she’s awake.

What is your OC’s favorite kind of ice cream? chocolate

What is your OC’s favorite dinosaur? pterodactyl

#imogen oc #flicker

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frumfrumfroo · 4 years

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Thankfully the story around this movie is shaping up to specifically be about JJ’s terrible storytelling and the way this movie betrayed The Last Jedi, so I feel like the long term conversation around it is going to be more like “Hey remember when Lucasfilm fucked up a completely good trilogy in the last movie?” instead of the ROTJ discussion where people just accept the retcons as canon now. Because frankly the Luke/Leia sibling reveal was as foreshadowed as and made more sense than Reypatine

Yeah, that’s what I think too. It’s still going to be accepted by a lot of people, unfortunately.

The sibling reveal ass-pull is the worst thing about the OT, it instantly shrank the universe and will always feel disjointed (I don’t remember seeing any part of the OT for the first time, it’s been on a loop since i was born- I still don’t naturally think of Luke and Leia as twins even though I’ve always known they supposedly are), but it doesn’t break the story, it doesn’t destroy anyone’s character arc. It leaves Leia hanging as far as resolution with Anakin, but that wasn’t something she needed until the retcon. They do at least acknowledge that it’s missing and try to address it (’tell your sister you were right’).

Whereas this Reypatine Skyusurper shit defeats the entire ST narrative. And no, it is not about found family.

1. Rey's whole problem she needed to grow out of was her delusion about her long lost family who totally loved her and living in a shitty desert by herself with their imagined ghosts instead of getting off her ass and having a life of her own, she needed to stop looking for parents in every authority figure she met, she needed to accept her past and move on and forge her own identity. That was her entire character arc and the whole thematic basis of TLJ was confronting her with it. With this ‘um actually’, the story now says she was right to sit around in a graveyard waiting for her parental daydream to come true and to have a ready-made identity handed to her on a silver platter with no character development or hard work necessary on her part whatsoever. She's back in the fucking desert on a dead planet with a delusion family of ghosts, but now the ghosts are literal. Her love is entirely barren.

2. Rey is a grown ass adult who ‘adopted’ herself into a dead family. They didn't adopt her. This is infantilising and creepy. She doesn't need a mummy and daddy, she needed to grow up and be her own person and start her own family. Now she never will, she's completely subsumed any stirrings of her own identity she started to have. Ben was the only person who pushed her towards adulthood and actualisation, without him she settles back into her bad coping mechanisms surrounded by enablers who don't know or understand her well enough to help. This is a horror film on at least three levels- Rey as the cuckoo changeling who steals the place of the true child, the Skywalkers as a cursed family of sociopaths who are haunting this bystander now that they’ve wiped themselves out, and Rey as mental patient who retreats completely from the real world into her fantasy.

3. Good Victim/Bad Victim replacement child bullshit. All of the Skywalkers and Han are such gaping fucking assholes they reject Ben but love Rey for the SAME reasons. Because she's just inherently better than him and there's nothing he can do to be worthy. There's no moment in his life he could have done something differently to be accepted, he's just a garbage child no one wants. He was doomed from conception. He dared to be traumatised by being preyed on, abandoned, and betrayed, so he doesn’t deserve to live.

4. Terrio said in an interview that the 'original sin' of SW was separating the twins. So adoption is bad, actually. Never mind that Luke and Leia were separated for their protection and both went to loving homes where they were raised well by good parents. They didn't get to grow up together on Tatooine so that's terrible?? And he says they were never reunited there so we all wanted that. a) No we didn't, Chris, everyone hated Tatooine and no one wanted to live there, Luke says 'if there's a bright centre to the universe you're on the planet that it's furthest from', Anakin was a slave there, his mother was murdered there, it's a DEAD PLANET where BAD THINGS HAPPEN and every character wanted to escape from it b) Have you seen RotJ? Because Luke and Leia were together on Tatooine in the movie, my dude. Leia got to be a slave there for a while too. How fun for her to get in on the family tradition.

5. You made it 100% about bloodlines, Chris. This disingenuous bullshit that it's about rejecting that is the most hollow fucking nonsense I've ever heard.

Rey’s power came from her bloodline, her ‘darkness’ is biologically inherited and isn’t her fault and disappears with no effort from her, you turned the Skywalker name into a fucking superhero mantle and had all the legacy characters anoint her as their heir because she was just born worthy. You made her ‘heir of all the Jedi’ and they’re her ‘chosen ancestors’. Hey, dumbass, the Jedi don’t have heirs. Anyone can have the Force, anyone can be a hero without the Force- you have destroyed that by making Force sensitivity the sign of the elect. F/nn shouldn’t be Force sensitive and making all the defected stormtroopers Force sensitive robs the characters of agency. You have rewritten a story about the deathless hope offered by the eternal possibility of choosing differently into a story about predestination.

This was never about ‘the Palpatines’ vs the Skywalkers. The Emperor was just one evil guy whose backstory and bloodline were irrelevant, he stands in for all selfishness and callous ambition, for the temptation to choose power and control over love. It’s a personal story about individuals and individual struggles- how to be an ethical adult. Lineage didn’t fucking matter, it was so important that Vader was Luke’s father because of the personal relationship it gave them, because of how it challenged Luke and his worldview. The connection it gave them which would radically redefine the stakes and ultimately give the OT its meaning. Rey has no connection to Palpatine and being related to him does nothing but implode any meaning her character ever had.

#salt #a tros ity #criticism #rey #the legacy #again: the only sense in which this film says 'bloodlines don't matter' is the message that parents have no obligation to their children #it's up to the children to 'deserve' love and the legacy they were born to #if you're groomed and abandoned and that fucks you up- well sorry you aren't deserving #your parents are designated Good People so they will replace you and you'll be fine with that bc you recognise your replacement's #innate superiority #commit suicide so the deserving party can have your life- it's the only good thing you can do #you miserable worthless damaged person you #I HATE EVERYTHING

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mytalemyworld · 3 years

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SON YAZ - EPISODE 6 / CANAN & SELIM

I swear they may be the angstiest couple on tv right now.

Yeah, I don't watch the other ones, I know, but their problems are realistic and their dialogues are rich, so when they get sad, you get madly sad too. And I miss this kind of angsty. The kind of "love is not enough", the kind of "i may look like I don't love you from the outside but if you leave for good, I will not bear it."

I keep watching it every week but I didn’t find enough time to talk about my thoughts. So that’s why I’ll write my feelings about episode 6 even though I watched the next episode already.

The last two episodes (6 and 7) were painfully delicious. When this show started, I didn't expect that the writers could really handle them well. Since the younger couple was being focused on in summaries and the reason the older couple exist was to create a family drama, I thought that their story would be poorly written but I was wrong and I am glad that I was, because now I get the weekly dose of my angsty couple need.

So Selim, this man of duty, this calm and cold man lost his composure when he learnt Canan was really serious about their divorce. He threatened a lawyer, shouted at him lots of curseful words in front of everyone. He lost his judgement and logic and even went too far by doing illegal things.

Because his lovely wife said to his face "he is nothing but a biggest disappointment to her".

This must be the lowest blow for him. And the crazy evil side of him wanted to hurt his enemy just like he did and when he is sure that something is fishy and shady about him, he thinks that even the method is wrong, he'll do it at the expense of his career and future.

By the way this is interesting, cause you know the bad guy of this story is Akgün according to the quotes and the story. But honestly the prosecutor is never written as a "family man" or "a lawful man". On the contrary, he is a gray character too. It's interesting because usually you can't see an imperfect prosecutor on Turkish tv but this one is ambitious and stops at nothing when it comes to catching bad guys, even if this means he may be accused of malfeasence.

Canan: There is no such thing "you and me". You are only the father of my children. That's it. Selim: What did I do to you? What did I do other than working for years with my honor? Why do you hate me so much, Canan? Tell me for God's sake. I have been fighting in a fire on my own and trying to keep my family out of this fire. What did I do? Is there something I don't know? Did something happen to you because of me?

He just hit the bull's eye but he had no idea.

The worst part yet to come.

When he was on the way to the court where their divorce case was held, he was listening to the records of his shady old friend and found out what happened to Canan.

Canan (telling Yağmur why she is madly angry about Akgün): I'll tell why I am angry, you'll learn everything. 6 years ago, you, me and Altay came to your aunt's house, do you remember? I was pregnant, 1 month and 2 weeks pregnant at that time. Not telling anything to your dad, we came here. I even thought a name for your sibling. Deniz. No matter what the sex would be, I would name him/her "Deniz" I was dreaming many things about the baby. Then your dad came. He said we couldn't stay here. He listed many reasons why we couldn't. You know his job. I couldn't say no. We turned back to İstanbul. 3 days later I went to a doctor. It turned out to be dead, Deniz... His heart couldn't take the stress.

He had no idea what she went through. He just had no idea about how his work mentally and physically wore her out. When she was scared of the threats they received, when some pshyco literally touched her daughter's hair to warn them about what could possibly happen to their family if her husband kept meddling in their business, she had no choice but to leave her home with her children. Even though Selim said they couldn't do anything, she just got scared. You can't accuse her of not being brave enough. Because I can't imagine how she must feel.

But if she had told Selim the baby...I wonder if some things could have changed...

Look at his face, he literally became devastated. He had hope, he thought maybe he could change her mind about the divorce but after this, he realised it was too late for them.

The Judge: Do you want to divorce as well? Selim: Yes, I do.

The backgorund music said "I am tired of hurting you."

(Enough is enough)

Just the other day...

Akgün: Ms Canan wants me to stay away from your children but you allowed me to give Yağmur a ride. If Ms. Canan finds out, won't she get angry? Selim: There is nothing left Canan may get angry at. We're going to divorce two days later. Akgün: Is there any way to fix it? Selim: I don't know. The person I care about the most said to me "You are nothing to me but the father of my children." I don't know how I will come to understand this. I can't accept it. I have made so many mistakes, I hurt her. I made my children sad. I know. But I have never stopped loving them for a second. My wife, my lover, my friend, she said without stumbling that I was a disappointment. I love my wife so much. I love my wife so much but I couldn't express it. I didn't manage to tell. So that's why we are going to be in a court two days later. The judge will give his judgement and then... a lifetime unhappiness. Tell me now, is there any remedy for this? Because I do not know. You know what, I kissed her the other day. I kissed her for the first time after many years. We got excited like kids. It made me feel longing so much.

I am not gonna talk about how many mistakes he made, I am not gonna talk about the fact that he really screwed up...I just died at that moment.

#son yaz #ali atay #funda eryiğit #alperen duymaz #episode 6 #thoughts

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localscissors · 4 years

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Triplet De Spell Oneshot (Part One)

Part Two

@cinnabunni5123 ‘s writing motivated me enough to clean up my old writing and get it posted. I’ll get the rest of this out tomorrow, but if you want more of this AU writing then I seriously suggest visiting @cinnabunni5123 ‘s Ao3 page (where she’s writing a brilliant multi-chapter fic of my AU) or @pilyarquitect , who has written several amazing one-shots. Both are more reliable than I’ll ever be (plus they’ve got some awesome fics in general. Other than that, this is just one of my earlier ideas in which the triplets kinda bond with everybody in an episodic-type way. Really suggest checking out their writing though, I love everything about it.

The best thing about stealing the identity of a missing child? Is that you get to steal their life too. And the real Dewey Duck,( wherever he might be), had the best, most loving family ever. Dewey de Spell loved his fake life.

And Della was the coolest adult Dewey had ever met. She gave him hugs and kisses and had as much enthusiasm for trouble as he did. The real Dewey was so lucky to be born into this family. Who knew such cool moms existed?

So when Della invited him and his brothers to go on an adventure with her, Dewey immediately agreed. Every second he spent with Della were the best seconds of his life. He wanted more of them. He wanted all of them. He wanted to hoard as many as he could before Magica blew everything away.

So, given the choice between searching for the dime with Huey, or going on an epic adventure with his fake mom, he chose fake mom.

“But Dewey, we need you to search for the dime!” Huey shouted.

“Can’t. Gotta go with Della on an epic airplane adventure. Sorry you guys weren’t invited! I’m already late gotta go byyeee!” Dewey ran out the bedroom door before Huey could say any more, leaving his two brothers alone. He could still hear Huey screaming his name, but he was already out the hall and down the stairs. They had loads of time to find the dime. He could help any other day, but going on adventures with Della? That was limited.

Besides, getting the McDuck family’s trust was part of the plan anyway, and his siblings were doing a horrible job of that. Dewey was happy to pick up their slack in that regard.

When he made it outside to the Sunchaser, he saw Della dutifully polishing her plane with a rag, and Scrooge impatiently checking his watch. A sudden bubble of excitement rose in his chest, driving him to run forward and wave to both of them. Della waved happily back, but her smile immediately fell when she only saw him. His steps faltered. Did he do something wrong?

“Are Huey and Louie coming?” She asked.

From what he knew about mothers, they were supposed to love all their children equally. From what he saw on TV, they got worried when one of them went missing. Knowing all of this, and knowing he was being very unfair to his brothers, Dewey felt an overwhelming ball of possessiveness roll up his throat. Why did she ask? Does she prefer them to him? Did she not want him there? If she found out he said they weren’t invited, would she shut him out?

All of these feelings were pushed down with a simple shrug and lie. “They didn’t want to come.”

“They didn’t want to..?” Something troubled passed over her features, and all at once, the feelings rolled back up at full force. She’ll shut him out, send him away. Say the adventure wasn’t worth it if it was just Dewey on the plane. Huey was so much smarter anyway, and Louie was more likeable. They weren’t loud or annoying or destructive or—

“More seats for us then, am I right?” Della laughed and threw an easy arm over his shoulder. “Double the leg room. We’ll have fun, just the two of us.”

‘Just the two of us’ became Dewey’s most favorite string of words, ever.

They boarded together, Scrooge following closely behind. Dewey could feel him staring, but ignored it. Della was smiling at him and he wasn’t going to let Scrooge ruin this moment for him.

“So which ones are the torpedo launchers?” The young duckling asked, ogling at the array of buttons and levers.

“Yer thinkin of submarines, boy,” Scrooge grumbled.

Della laughed and sat in the pilot’s seat, gesturing for Dewey to sit down beside her. “Yeah, no torpedos. Here, I’ll show what these buttons do.”

Scrooge left for the back of the plane. Dewey could feel the old man’s irritation just below his forced calm facade, and that’s why he forced himself to stay completely still until he heard Scrooge take his seat. Angry adults were unpredictable at their best, and he didn’t want to do anything to set him off. Once Dewey was sure that Mr. McDuck was at a safe distance, he relaxed and let Della show him how to steer.

Dewey peered out the window as they lifted off, amazed at how quickly they rose. Aunt Magica sometimes told them about her flying broom, old and broken and sitting unused in the corner of the closet. He wondered if she felt this happy when she flew.

____________________________________________________________________

Huey, meanwhile, was fuming. “I can’t believe he would just walk out like that! Doesn’t he care at all—!”

Louie shrugged. “Eh, who needs him anyway. Let Dewey waste time with our fake mom if he wants. We know where the real treasure is.”

Huey sighed, nodding. “Yeah, you’re right. We know our priorities.” After a moment, he tilted his head. “...do you really think Della didn’t invite us? Actually, never mind. Doesn’t matter.”

The thought of not being invited did sting, but honestly, it sounded like the exact type of lie Dewey would spin.

“Where are we searching today?” Louie asked.

Huey pulled out two pieces of paper from his coat pocket and unfolded them. One was a map of the mansion grounds, and the other was a neatly organized checklist. Huey visibly brightened at the sight of his own handiwork, proud of the neat lines and careful planning.

“According to our checklist—”

“Which you wrote,” said Louie.

“—Our next stop in the Money Bin. That’s where Scrooge keeps all his treasures.

Louie grinned and rubbed his hands together greedily. “I wonder how much he’s got stocked in there? I’ve heard, he only piles up his gold to swim in it!”

“That’s so gross.”

“Maybe to you, but to me?” Louie put a fist over his heart. “this is the kind of wealth I aspire to.”

Huey snorted and shook his head. “Well, he’s got all his money in there. So logically, he’d put the dime in there too.”

Louie silently disagreed. If he had an important all-powerful dime, he’d store it someplace special! Not with all the common treasure. But Louie rarely spoke his opinions out loud. Coming up with plans (especially plans for Magica) was a risk, and Huey willingly took that risk every time. It was so much easier to follow than lead.

Also, he really, really wanted to see the Bin. No way he was ruining this chance by expressing his doubts now, of all times.

“Let’s get going then,” Louie said, pushing his brother out the door. “We’ve got treasure to see and dimes to steal. Let’s go, go, go!”

“Okay, okay. Wait, one minute. Just… there’s a problem. We don’t know how to get in, and it’s probably locked.”

“So? That’s why we’ve got magic, Huey. I’m a magical lock-smith.”

Huey shook his head. “That’s not enough. Haven’t you seen how many protection wards there are in this mansion alone ? I can’t even imagine how many guard spells he’s got at the money bin. I was hoping Dewey could maybe break through them, but he ran off—”

“What are you guys whispering about?”

“AGH!” Louie jumped backward, clutching his heart in fright at the third unexpected voice that appeared above them. Looking up, they saw Webby hanging out of a ventilation shaft in the ceiling, grinning sheepishly.

“Wha—WEBBY! Were you spying on us!?” Louie cried.

“Not on purpose. I was just coming over to see what you guys were doing.” She hopped down and landed easily next to them.

Louie’s heart was still racing, and knowing that Webby could’ve been listening to them at any time scared him. He was unable to keep the irritation from his voice when he snapped,“That’s creepy. Just knock on the door like a normal person.”

Webby winced, sheepishly pulling on her sweater. “I’m sorry. I just wanted to see what you were doing.”

Huey was also startled, and made a personal note to be more aware of the vents next time they planned. He was annoyed, but didn’t want to hurt her feelings. “It’s fine, just please don’t do that again.”

Webby nodded seriously, and then tilted her head. “What were you guys talking about anyway? I couldn’t hear anything from up there.”

“Nothing,” Louie answered.

“Secrets,” Huey blurted.

Webby squealed and rocked on her heals excitedly. “Secrets are my favorite! I’m so good at keeping them. Let me tell you one of mine! I’ve hidden several spears all over the mansion, so that I’m always ready for attack.”

Louie smacked a hand on his forehead. Huey was the worst at lying. Why couldn’t he keep his beak shut?”

Webby continued. “I told you one of my secrets. Now what’s yours?”

While Huey panicked at the question, fumbling for words, Louie, saw an opportunity. He put a hand on Huey’s shoulder and squeezed, silently assuring him that he could handle this.

“We’ve got a lot of secrets,” Louie grinned. “But you wanna know our biggest one?”

Louie could feel Huey tense behind him while Webby nodded eagerly. Louie paused for dramatic effect, eating a good few seconds before revealing, “We’re McDuck nerds. We love all things Scrooge McDuck.”

Webby gasped. “You too!? I thought I was the only one!”

“Well, you’re not. We’ve been researching the McDuck family four entire lives.” Which was technically true. Magica has repeatedly cursed every aunt, uncle, and cousin of the McDuck family for as they could remember.

“That’s amazing! What do you wanna talk about first? The time he saved an entire city from King Akhum’s curse? Or how about that time he outsmarted a village of evil seers, who foretold false prophecies of death? Or maybe we should go all the way back to his birth; Glasgow, 1867. The night was cold, and the air was—”

“We already know all that,” Louie interrupted, waving away her words. Then he faked a sad expression. “That’s the problem. We already learned everything there is to know, but we still haven’t seen the real thing. His artifacts, his treasures, his adventures...”

“Oh. That’s because he keeps it all in his Money Bin,” Webby said.

Louie brightened. “Really? You’ve seen it?”

Webby laughed. “Of course I have. Uncle Scrooge takes me there all the time.”

“Do you think you can get us in?” Huey asked hopefully.

Webby immediately stepped back, rubbing her arm anxiously. “Um, I don’t know. I’m actually not allowed in there by myself…”

“You won’t be by yourself, you’ll have us,” Louie encouraged. “C’mon, we’re all experts. You can be our guide. Uncle Scrooge and Della are out, so they can’t escort us anyway”

Webby shook her head, still unsure. “I can ask my Granny… she can take us.”

“Please?” Louie begged. “This has been our dream our entire lives.”

Webby looked away, and he realized he needed a different angle. He crossed his arms, and changed his tone from pleading to accusing.

“This is the type of stuff friends do for each other. I thought you were our friend.”

Webby jerked back, as if burned by his words. He felt bad, but it had the exact effect he wanted.

“N-no no! I am! I am your friend! I Just don’t want to—”

Louie rolled right over her protests. “This is the type of stuff friends do for each other. It’s not even a big deal, you’ve been there a hundred times.”

Webby looked so torn and hurt that Louie almost apologized right then and there, but he hardened himself. He was good at exactly one thing and he wasn’t gonna backtrack just because of a little guilt. He looked toward Huey, silently hoping he could top this off with a little bit of his natural good cop routine.

Thankfully, he stepped in.

“You’re our best friend, Webby,” Huey said sincerely. “It would mean the world to us if you could show us around.”

Louie held his breath as Webby thought on their words, still torn between house rules and peer pressure.

This is… this is what friends do for each other, right?” Webby asked.

“Oh yes, definitely,” Louie assured. Huey also nodded. This is what friends did on TV, after all. They always snuck around behind the adults’ backs.

Webby sighed decisively,her expression determined. “Okay. Let’s do this.”

#ducktales au #triplet de spell #triplet de spell au #ducktales fanfiction #fanfction #au #my writing #2020 writing

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