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stcrgazings · 2 years

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Mending the broken pieces | (c.l)

[WHY WON’T YOU LOVE ME PT2]

This is the second part of why won’t you love me to read the first part is here

note: soooo, the part 2 of why won’t you love me is finally here and I am completely obsessed with how it turned out, I hope y’all enjoy it reading it just as much as I enjoyed writing it, happy reading!! Btw pls leave your feedback and let me know if you liked it.

pairing: charles leclerc x female character/reader

summary: in the second part of why won’t you love me, you and Charles try and fix things but will it be enough?

warning: alcohol, cursing, cigarettes, slight anxiety attack, crying, fighting, slight mentions of sex. (didn’t know if y’all wanted smut so I didn’t included it)

word count: 3.3K

———

It had been three days since you left.

And every minute that passed Charles felt the sink in his stomach dig further.

Okay so he had been the absolute biggest dick in the whole country of Monaco, and he had the time to realize that as the hours passed after you left.

He couldn’t believe the way he acted towards you and it angered him even more that it took, you leaving for him to realize it.

He took the last caramel brownie that you had made on Friday that he didn’t even notice to his mouth, as he dialed your phone once again for the thousand time on those last three days.

He knew he was acting selfishly the moment he arrived and locked himself in that stupid simulator room, he knew he should’ve just eat the pasta, he knew you were incredibly excited for the trip to Portofino and that that cancellation would’ve hurt you and he knew that you made the brownies just for him to try, and he knew it wouldn’t have killed him to watched the movie with you, but he just didn’t.

Why? Because he just didn’t feel like it, because for that whole week he just assumed you’d be there, that you’d just take it because he knew that you loved him, he straight out took you for granted, assuming you’ll always be there for him, even when he directed an entirety of 20 words to you in the whole first week of the summer break.

So he had called, and texted and apologized through voicemails and messages but without getting a response from you whatsoever, not even a delivered on the sight.

“Come on baby, pick up, please” he whispered to himself as the phone rang for a third time, the clock in the wall marking almost 2 am.

He was starting to get to the point where he was basically worried sick about where the hell you were, since you hadn’t given any sign of life since you left.

He had call your mum and your dad and even your sister who lived back in England with her husband.

I mean he knew you were okay since he called Daniel about a dozen times and when the Australian finally pick up he cursed him with probably every cursed word in the book, and after Charles had apologized and begged Daniel told him that you were alright, that he had picked you up from the apartment you both shared but he didn’t say where you were staying despite Charles pleads, Daniel cursed him again telling him that when he picked you up you were made a mess.

“She said she couldn’t breathe and wouldn’t stop fucking crying, you’re a fucking jerk, she’s so awesome and you know she doesn’t deserves whatever you did to her, so you either fix it, or leave her alone” the words of the Australian driver still resounding in the back of his mind, shattering his heart as pictures in the back of his mind the mess he had made upon you.

“The number you have dialed it’s not available at this time, please try again lat…” the robotic voice replied in what Charles in what it seem now like it was mocking from the million times Charles had heard it in the last few hours.

He throw himself on the couch as he check the chat he maintained with you, checking to see if maybe by a miracle of higher power you had answered his texts.

But you hadn’t, not even read them.

So he rubs his faces and eyes as he felt his stomach sank further as he imagined all the possible scenarios you could be in right now, ana he knew he deserved each and every one of them, for not loving you the way you deserved, for not treating you the way you deserved and for not showing that in fact he did love you and need you more than anything in this world.

He was angry and disappointed at himself, and he had taken out on you completely ignoring you and pushing you away and now you had disappeared from the face of the planet earth.

At least that’s what he thought as he opened the TikTok app in an attempt to keep himself awake.

And lord did that work as the first video that popped up on his screen was one of you in a very tight black dress dancing in a booth of a very crowded club as you were being sprayed in champagne by Kelly Picket and some of your other friends.

His heart started beating faster than the f1 car he drove daily as he watched the video again, trying to convince himself that maybe it was an old video from someone’s birthday that you had maybe mentioned to him a while ago and he had forgotten, but all that convincing was for nothing as he took a glimpse of the video’s caption.

“Y/N Y/L in a club in Monaco earlier tonight, Charles Leclerc keeps winning”

Oh God, you were at a club?!

(…)

To say you were completely, totally and utterly wasted was the understatement of the century.

And you knew that as you downed yet another bottle of water as you tried to wash off the feeling of nausea that camped in the back of your throat, as you everything around you was spinning at a high speed.

You were sitting in the sidewalk outside of the bar back pressed against a stop sign as you prayed that the ill feeling would go away, you had drank an insanely amount of vodka, trying to numb the pain, to forget Charles’ careless words and to shut your on thoughts as they kept repeating in the back of your mind like the most sick ass mantra.

why?

why won’t you love me?

You shook your head trying to get those stupids thoughts out of your head and as the phone screen lit up for the first time in three days it started beeping and vibrating like something you had never seen before, thousands of texts and calls from Charles one showing after the other all of them being pleads and apologies and love you’s.

You felt her eyes getting watery as she read one by one the texts she had received from her boyfriend, so with shaky hands and tears you started texting.

You wanted to say so much, you wanted to say how much you had missed him, how much you’ve been missing the thing you both used to have, but you’re brain kinda typed for itself as a single text was send in the chat you shared with the pilot.

I am trying to forgive you, but I’m struggling cuz I don’t know how.

sat. 2:16 am

You blocked the phone scared of what the answer of your boyfriend could be, a girl standing beside you, a worried look painted on her face.

“You ok?”

You chucked softly as you nodded drying the tears that kept running trough your cheeks.

“Girl you’ve been crying your eyes out for the past five minutes I’ve been here, you’re not okay, you need a cigarette”

You laughed again as you grabbed the cigarette from her hand.

“So what happened?”

“My boyfriend’s a douche” was the only thing you stated as you took a hit off the cigarette, throwing her head back in an attempt to relax herself.

“Yeah but he loves you” the girl said as she smiled as she smoked her cigarette too.

“I guess” you murmured softly as you press your plans against your face trying to keep

yourself awake and to dry the tears.

“If you have to guess than it’s probably not there” the pressure on your chest started to build up.

“If you had asked me a month ago, I would’ve probably said yes, but right now I feel like I’m falling from something that we built way too high and believe me, it’s a long way down”

“If you’re telling me this, after a fight you just had, then my chick from the club advise is, talk to him, you’re saying all that from a place of anger and fear, fear of what’s coming next, and what he might say to you but we all say things we don’t mean when we fight, so talk to him” the girl brushed her hand against your shoulder as you sobbed into your hands.

“What if he doesn’t love me anymore?” You asked as your voice broke a little, because she was right you were scared, scared of what he might say to you, of what might happen next, of everything.

“Well by the way your phone is beeping right now, he probably does, give him a chance.” She said as she pointed at the lit screen of your phone throwing her cigarette to the floor making her way back to the bar. “It’s better to regret about trying, than to regret of not trying at all, pick up, bye” she said goodbye as she entered the club once again with a small hand gesture.

So you made yourself look at the phone screen as Charles’ nickname “baby” adorned the screen surrounded with hearts and with all the bravery you had on your drunk self, you picked up.

“Mon amour, please let’s talk you— you know I love you I can— I can’t do this without you, please” the desperate pleads from Charles was the first thing that sounded, breaking your hearts as you head him uncontrollably sobbing waiting for your answer.

“Charles baby, calm down, please”

“I— I am so sorry, please let’s talk” he sobbed, you were now crying too, hating the current situation you both were in but you tried to compose yourself as you didn’t want Charles to get more agitated than he already was.

“I know, It’s okay, we’ll talk but can you come and pick me up? Please” you asked as a whisper basically, but you knew the answer before he spoke as the sound of keys clattering and a door opening before he spoke.

“I’ll be there in 10” Charles said before a comfortable silence filled up the line, you knew he hadn’t hanged up so when you were about to, he interrupted you as he dried the tears that fell through his cheeks. “I love you”

“See you, Charles” you muttered as you hung to start waiting for him in the empty street, texting your friends that you were leaving.

(…)

Charles didn’t lie when he said that he’d get there in 10 minutes, and you knew that the second you saw his Ferrari 488 pista spider across the street, all your friends cheering as you smiled towards them.

“Someone is getting makeup sex tonight!”

“Climb that man like a tree honey!”

Were some of the screams directed towards you as you gave them your goodbyes and the finger making your way to Charles car a surprise face showing up on you as the pilot got out the car, saying hi to you on a shyly manner as surrounded the car to open the passenger door just for you.

“For ma chérie” he said as he bowed for you to enter the car, making you giggle softly.

“Really, Charles?” You chuckled as you entered the car once again, him nodding.

“I just want to show you that I am, really sorry and that I shouldn’t have acted liked a dick” he said as he entered the car, putting his seatbelt on.

“We’ll you don’t really get to do that” you mumbled under your breath, as you took the hand he had placed on your tight back into his lap.

“But I am sorry, why won’t you let me show it to you?” He asked as he started driving back into your place, a serious expression planted on his face.

“Just like you didn’t let me show you how I love you back in our apartment? And plus how do I know this isn’t some kind of apology act? How do I know you won’t be back to your selfish and imbecile ways as soon we’re back to our apartment and I forgive you, how do I know you do love me?”

“I— I love you! I do!” He said as he stopped the car in a red light in the busy Monaco streets, the despair clear on his face eary eyes as he stared into you.

“That isn’t what you said just three days ago!” You fought back, because yes there wasn’t anything more in the world that you wanted than to fix things with Charles, but you were scared because you didn’t wanted to feel the way you felt last week locked in that miserable apartment taking all of Charles’ shitty attitudes, wondering what the fuck you had done wrong knowing there wasn’t any answer to that question, and wondering why your boyfriend won’t love you.

“And I didn’t mean any of it! I was angry and upset I know that I shouldn’t have said it and i am sorry” he argued back, but way more calmer than you, probably because he knew that you were drunk and if the both of you got upset and disturbed you’d probably won’t get to anything, and he didn’t want that, he wanted to fix things, to get you back, to go back to the thing you had before knowing that he was the one that wreck it, which destroyed him more.

“But how do I know that! How do I know you’re telling the truth!” You cried, making Charles’ stomach twirl inside of him, there was nothing that he hated more than to see you cry and he hated it even more knowing that he was the reason of it as he watched you visibly shake in the seat beside him, the alcohol in your system definitely not helping you as you started to feel the ferrari was getting smaller and the air was missing in you lungs.

He parked the car on the apartment parking lot as he got out of the car as fast as his feet allowed him to, surrounding the car to once again open the car door of your side but not for you to get out as he grabbed you by the legs turning around to face him as he crouched beside you, one of his hands grabbing you gently by the jaw, wanting for you to focus on him for a sec and not the awful thoughts he knew were filling your head by the second.

“Hey, hey, look at me, ok? Focus on me baby, c’mon” he called you out softly as he rubbed your tight in a sweetly manner in an attempt for you to steady your breath, you did as you were told wanting to calm down as well staring into his bright green eyes that somehow always gave you comfort.

“You know it’s true because…” he paused for a second trying to formulate what to say in his head as he smiled and continued. “Because I love with everything that i have, and I can’t even bare the thought of not having you in my life, because my chest hurts every time i even began to imagine a life without you by side, because this past few days without you in the house have been hell, because for i fact that can do this without and more importantly I don’t want to because baby the rest of the world doesn’t matter if I don’t have you, I want you and need you back because I don’t care about the fancy ass cars, and the parties and the championship because what’s the point of winning races if I don’t drink the celebratory champagne with you, because I love you, and you’re the only one I care and want me beside me, kissing as we celebrate and hugging after a crappy day and from now on there won’t be a day where I don’t show it to you I promise you that, and as well I’ll spend the fucking rest of the summer break proving to you that I am sorry for the way I treated you and how much I fucking mean it when I say I love you”

He wanted to say so much more, but he didn’t really had the chance to as you grabbed his face and kissed him.

Charles could swear he felt like he could breath again after those three miserable days as his lips touched yours, it was a sweet intimate kiss as your hand snaked to the back of his neck as the other grabbed him by the collar of his hoodie you wanting him to be as close as posible as he smiled into the kiss.

“I missed you” you finally admitted the confession that was stuck in the back of your throat since the moment you saw him arrive to the club making you both giggle.

“I missed so much too Mon Amour, all I’ve fucking done in these past days was be miserable as I thought bout you” you laughed into his lips as he began to leave a path of kisses through your jaw mumbling how much he had missed you in between the kisses.

“Couldn’t get you out my fucking head, it’s like you’re injected in me” he mumbled as you giggled softly once again, grabbing his face to kiss him again.

“I swear to god Leclerc, treat me or act the way you did again and I’ll cut your dick off” you threatened kind of jokingly making him join you in your soft laughter.

“Oh no chérie, that will not be happening again you have I promise you by my f1 driver honor” he said as he pressed one of his hands on his chest, by his heart like he was swearing in a court or something as the other snaked behind your knees as he grabbed you by surprise when suddenly he lifted you bridal style out of the car, making you squeal loudly as he closed the car door walking away from the Ferrari with you in his arms like it was nothing.

“That doesn’t even exist!” You chuckle as he got inside the elevator laughing too.

“It does!” He defended himself. “You’re just not a f1 driver so you don’t know about it amour”

You denied with your head still laughing as he smirked at you.

“How about we go back to our home baby, and you let me show you how sorry I am” he whispered, mouth pressed in your ear as you felt the skin in the back of your neck go cold and your lower abdomen flutter in anticipation

“Jummm, that does sound good Mr. Leclerc” you smiled at him, as you pressed your forehead with his as the elevator opened in your floor.

“Well let’s go baby” he said as he made his way on to your apartment.

So you both got into the apartment to the shower where Charles truly showed you how sorry he was he took off your dress and washed your body and hair leaving kisses in everything inch of it, to then wrapped you in a towel and brush your hair with you sitting in his lap.

Then you both basically pass out on the bed till the day after at 2pm.

Where he woke you up with the best breakfast you had eaten in a long time and two tickets for Portofino and all the bags already packed as he also showed you in some other ways how sorry he was.

THE END.