#feeling a little more confident and wanting to tackle some more difficult compositions next time!!
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Essay
Reath Neilson
Final Paper
Adriana Balic
Songwriting 3
This semester in Songwriting 3 has been challenging at times, but an overall positive experience as a student and musician. In this paper I’ll discuss my experience and growth, from my lyrically-crowded first song to my more comfortable and honest final one. Over the semester I was blessed to encounter new material as well as improve on my pre-existing abilities. Collaborations, workshop comments and consistent need for new material helped to push me to broaden my experience as a songwriter. I would be remiss, however, not to mention the fantastically accepting environment created by my peers and professor. Without their encouragement and often insightful critiques, my personal growth as a songwriter and performer would certainly have been stunted. I felt free to explore areas of music that I’ve always enjoyed but had never had the confidence to participate in because of the overwhelming support from the class. Additionally, having a veteran of the grand-scale performance industry as our professor provided an experienced opinion to compare with the opinions of my peers. The experienced perspective combined with the greener yet varied perspectives gave a much more complete understanding of where each song needed to improve and where each song succeeded. For these reasons and many others, I am profoundly grateful to Ana, Katharine, Jess, Christine, and Adriana. My experience in Songwriting 3 truly advanced my ability as a songwriter.
As a lifelong songwriter, I was eager to digest the new material I was introduced to. Although I enjoyed Songwriting 1 and 2 thoroughly and greatly appreciated the feedback I was given, I felt that I had at the very least had minimal experience with everything covered by the syllabus. I do feel that I improved significantly in many areas of my writing during those classes, but I rarely felt challenged by anything new. In songwriting 3, I experienced many new things. The first concept new to me was performance technique for my own music. In high school I enjoyed participating in musicals and plays, activities that I thought prepared me well for public performance as an artist. In actuality, theater never taught me subtle elements like mic positioning and proper storytelling through stage presence. After taking Adriana’s notes into account, I could feel my performances improve song-to-song. I was able to utilize some of these techniques while playing my favorite song from this semester, “Airhead,” at our final. A second new experience came soon after. The accepting and intimate environment created by our small class gave me the courage to try hip-hop. A long time lover of rap music, I’ve always felt that I had no business making it myself. Something about participating felt different than spectating, like I would be inserting myself into a narrative that doesn’t concern me or appropriating someone else’s culture. After a half of a semester though, I felt creatively free to explore whatever avenues of songwriting I would like, even the ones I hadn’t been down before. “Waiting” was my first attempt at a R&B/Rap song. Working with Christine on our collaborative song brought new things in hip-hop as well. Prior to our final, I had never performed rap publicly or used the stage name Sam Handwich. Christine’s bravery in tackling such a public project outside of her comfort zone gave me the courage to really go for it in the performance and lyrical composition. This experience gave me confidence to push myself creatively and to proudly share the art that I make, regardless of audience or context.
In addition to new material, familiar concepts improved my songwriting and ability as a musician. When writing music I especially take pride in my lyrics, but I learned that my enthusiasm for words can actually be a hindrance as well as a benefit. When I wrote “Onomatopoeia,” I wanted my lyrics to be rhythmically complex, to utilize the maximum amount of wit I could muster, and to be chock full of external and internal rhyme schemes. When I presented my songs my peers and professor felt that they were somewhat crowded, which made them hard to understand. This was an extremely helpful critique for me. Being so wrapped up in the wit and sound of my lyrics, I didn’t notice that I had sacrificed some comprehensibility in my pursuit. When I wrote “Waiting,” I tried to write extremely simple lyrics, leaving significant space in my verse and brief choruses. In my initial performance of the song, the class and I agreed that it felt slow moving and empty. By writing the second verse as a rap, I was able to balance out some of the lyrical simplicity in the rest of the track. My final song, “Airhead,” is my favorite. After writing too much then too little, I found it easier to let go of my expectations for my own lyrics and write honestly. I found that my natural lyrical voice might not be as complicated but may be more effective as a songwriter, presenting the same themes and wordplay in a more comprehensible way. I feel that I’ve grown closer to writing insightful lyrics that sound like casual speech, something that has always been a goal of mine. Also, I feel that my collaborative abilities improved. When I was working with Katherine on the Bigfoot song, I felt very comfortable, like I was operating inside my comfort zone. This is probably because I have written many songs with jingly guitar rhythms and cute lyrics, like the Bigfoot tune. While there is nothing wrong with collaborating on material you feel comfortable with, I was excited to tackle something more difficult with Christine. My second collaboration was anything but comfortable. The song was a groove-based vamp, relying heavily on the vocal performance and showmanship of two first-time rappers. I learned how to better trust my partner’s musical instinct, especially when trying a new style of music. In the future, I hope to be a more open collaborator because of this experience.
Much of my personal growth can be attributed to a few especially helpful and engaging aspects of the course. Without these elements I can confidently say I would not have had the opportunities I did to push forward in my progress. Due to the fact that each song required a recorded demo, I was prompted to begin the recording process on all of my songs. Now, half of them have been completed as full songs which will appear on my two summer releases. Without the initial prompting to record some kind of basic track, I could’ve easily allowed myself to move on to writing the next thing rather than finish recording the last. Also, the way Adriana ran workshops became extremely beneficial. In my past experience, the class would listen to a student perform, then give feedback verbally. While this method is certainly helpful, I often found that after four or five classmates and the professor had commented, it was difficult for me to remember the details of the critiques. By asking us to type out statements on a shared Google Doc before explaining ourselves face-to-face, Adriana made it easier to quickly recall what was said when I returned home. This made the workshops far more productive and effective at improving material.
After one of the most difficult years of my young life, I am pleased to say that I have big plans for the future, thanks in no small way to Songwriting 3. Due in part to the required demos, I am proud to announce that my hip-hop EP titled, “Lucky Cricket” by Sam Handwich will be available for streaming and download by June 10th this summer. My fuzz rock EP, which was briefly put on hold to accommodate my rap project, will be released in early July. This release will include “Onomatopoeia,” “Airhead,” and “Looking at the Same Moon” as well as several unheard tracks written last semester and in between assignments. Outside of upcoming personal projects, I’m launching a quasi-record label with a few friends this summer. Our goal is to unite a network of young Los Angeles artists who use social media to promote their art. When each artist goes to post their new content on their social media pages, they’ll share a link to the label’s website. When followers click on the link they’ll see the artists’ new material first, then can scroll down to see material posted by every artist on the label. This way, we’ll be able to improve outreach. Additionally, the label will be hosting shows this summer featuring all of our artists. During the shows, artists who aren’t performing (myself included) will sell merchandise and direct audience members to any of our social media pages, or our website. Although I don’t see this “label” making much of an impact initially, I trust in the value of consistent collaboration and networking. If nothing else, this label will provide some interesting creative opportunities. Any interested parties should contact me at my personal email, which can be found on this site. Finally, I would like to quickly thank my peers and professor one last time. Your support, understanding, and genuine belief in me was unwavering. Your creativity, musicality, and kindness were inspiring. Thank you all for a wonderful semester.
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Even after an amazing “Manning-esque” performance at Texas A&M in 2016,
Shea Patterson will still have to compete to keep his job in 2017
The most surprised Ole Miss person on National Signing Day may very have been Shea Patterson.
Some may have been pleasantly surprised on that day when the Ole Miss class ranking jumped 23 spots from No. 53 on the 247Sports composite list to No. 30.
Patterson was more likely surprised to find he was still competing for the starting quarterback job.
There are two three-star signees in the 2017 class in junior college transfer Jordan Ta’amu and high school recruit Alex Faniel.
There’s even talk of moving athletic rising sophomore Jason Pellerin – the guy Patterson beat for the starting job after Chad Kelly was injured last November – to another position.
And Patterson’s not the clear starter?
Just one year ago many anointed Patterson as the Ole Miss quarterback of the future. He was the No. 1-rated quarterback in the 2016 recruiting class, the No. 4-rated overall prospect.
Star brightness gave the Ole Miss 2016 class an electric look. It had two five-stars and 11 four-stars as selected by 247Sports.
Patterson was the No. 4 overall prospect, and he wasn’t even the highest-rated player in Ole Miss class. That was offensive tackle Greg Little, who was ranked third.
It wasn’t hard to watch the video of Patterson’s quick release, to see his footwork, to read the analysis of recruiting media and anoint him as the man.
The hype only grew stronger after Kelly’s injury when in dramatic fashion the redshirt was pulled off Patterson, and he responded by passing for 300-plus yards and a couple of touchdowns to lead Ole Miss past Texas A&M at raucous Kyle Field.
Asked on signing day why a junior college quarterback with only two years to play would sign with a team that had an entrenched sophomore starter Freeze said that the sophomore really isn’t entrenched.
What did Freeze tell Ta’amu to convince him to choose Ole Miss?
“Quarterbacks, you’re one play away from playing. You get an opportunity to come and play in the Southeastern Conference and compete. We’re going to compete for the starting job, even though we all feel like Shea Patterson is the guy.”
What we have here are theatrics.
Shea Patterson earned the starting job after Kelly’s injury. He strengthened his hold on it against Texas A&M and didn’t lose it against Vanderbilt and Mississippi State, although those were two rather dismal offensive performances with just 37 combined points and three turnovers.
The last two games were not the results Ole Miss needs from its starting quarterback.
The most disappointing thing about the last two games, however, was the lack of chemistry between Patterson and a deep and talented group of receivers.
The number of dropped passes in the last two games – a 38-17 loss at Vanderbilt and a humbling 55-20 loss to Mississippi State – were alarming.
Freeze would say later that he is not concerned by that season-ending trend, that he believes the hundreds of reps and the time that Patterson and the receivers will spend together will cure the drops.
You would like to have seen Patterson emerge from his three-game season with better than a 54.5 completion percentage. In the Freeze offense, you’d really like to see that up around the lower- to mid-60s.
That’s more of the elite figure you expect from Patterson.
Perhaps the expectations are too high, the early praise too much. It’s too early to say that. Patterson has done nothing to suggest the buzz about him was not deserved. With fewer drops at season’s end – Freeze counted at least ten against Vanderbilt – the completion percentage would be much higher.
Receivers aren’t going to catch every ball, but with the skill level that is amassed at Ole Miss right now, they should catch most.
The issue, it appears, was the “catchability” of Patterson’s ball compared to Kelly’s. There was some difference, and receivers were much more used to Kelly. Again, time is expected to heal those wounds.
As far as turnovers, Patterson had three interceptions in three games, two of them in the finale against Mississippi State that could have been avoided with a little help.
One Patterson pass was underthrown to Quincy Adeboyejo in the end zone, allowing MSU safety Jamal Peters to turn and make a play. Adeoboyejo, though, did not turn and adjust, didn’t fight for the ball and try to prevent the interception.
Later in the game’s final few minutes a screen pass to running back Akeem Judd hit Judd in the hands. He bobbled it, juggled it and kept it in play long enough to be picked and returned for a touchdown.
Plays like that are a part of football but need to be considered in trying to gauge Patterson’s fitness moving forward.
Had there been fewer drops and one interception as opposed to three his stat line would look a lot different going into his sophomore year.
As far as his looming competition, most coaches aren’t going to stand before media on signing day and throw water on new recruits by telling them they have no chance to get on the field.
That’s especially true with a new offensive coordinator and wide receivers coach, just two of the five positions Freeze has had to fill in the off-season.
In some respects, the competitive field will be level in the spring as Patterson and Ta’amu will both be seeing the offensive system of Phil Longo for the first time. Faniel will arrive in the summer.
“Phil hasn’t seen any of those guys,” Freeze said. “They’ll go out and compete.”
Freeze is hopeful that competition will play out in such a manner that he feels confident in moving Pellerin to another spot, possibly tight end.
“Part of the thinking process here is Jason Pellerin and where does he fit in,” Freeze said. “Is he the next Evan Engram? If there’s a backup or two, you can do that with him. Or is he the best guy to play quarterback? Or is it a combination.”
All the bases are covered in that statement.
The truth is there’s always competition.
Longo hasn’t been in a full-pad practice with Patterson, but he’s had plenty of time to break down video on his presumed starter and plenty of time to hear Freeze talk about the things Patterson did well and did not as well in three games.
That’s an advantage for Patterson, who if his play last season is an indication – and it likely is – will continue to create his own advantages when practice opportunities arrive.
Ta’amu and Faniel will get their reps.
Throws will be charted, and statistics will be evaluated.
If Jordan Ta’amu, a 6-2, 200-pound dual threat guy completes 75 percent and throws no interceptions through 15 spring practices and plays just as flawless in August camp then he’ll give Freeze a real reason to pause and take a second look.
Pellerin and Faniel will get reps too, but if Freeze is giving real thought to putting Pellerin someplace else, it seems like spring would be a good time to make that move.
What Freeze would like to see for his quarterbacks in the months is for Patterson to build on the legend he began at Texas A&M, for his timing and chemistry with receivers to take a big step forward, for Ta’amu to show an early competency level and for Faniel to follow that path as well.
The idea of Pellerin (6-4, 230) as a threat in the passing game as a tight end of some sort of H-back is intriguing.
If Freeze can gain confidence in his newcomers, he can have a more staggered pecking order behind Patterson with an upperclassman who’s cut his teeth, to some degree, two years out of high school and a true freshman who’s embarking on his journey.
“We signed the two quarterbacks to get us spread out and back to the right format in the quarterback room – the freshman, sophomore, junior, senior-type deal,” Freeze said. “Now we have four guys on scholarship after playing last year with three.”
So, Patterson may have been surprised on Signing Day, but he can relax.
Yes, there will be competition, but Ole Miss signed an elite talent at the position in 2016. It will be difficult – not impossible – for one of the newcomers to latch on to the job if Patterson puts in the work on and off the field that is expected of starting quarterbacks in the SEC.
“Those guys will go out and compete this spring,” Freeze said. “I didn’t want to sign two freshmen. I wanted to sign a JUCO guy and a freshman to battle it out in the spring and figure out who the one, two and three guys are. And to figure out where Jason fits in that too.
“Jason needs to be on the field somewhere.”
By: Parrish Alford a contributor from the Daily Journal
In the March / April issue of Rebel Nation Magazine
Photos by Greg Pevey
Illustration by Robert Bristow
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Interview with Christian Hopkins
We at platform PHOTO recently had the pleasure of interviewing young photographer Christian Hopkins, whose images experiment with combining self-portraiture and conceptual techniques, achieving dramatic and emotive results. Christian’s path into the photographic world was instigated when he received a camera as a gift and despite his reservations, forced himself to start photographing. Photography made him see the world in a more beautiful light and soon became a tool for Christian in battling his demons, providing a form of therapy in coping with his depression and allowing him a channel to communicate his emotions. Here, Christian opens up to us, offering an insight into his often arduous and meticulously thought out photographic process.
platformPHOTO: Hi Christian, please tell us about yourself, your life and how you discovered photography.
Christian Hopkins: It’s difficult to talk about myself with any sort of brevity, not quite because I have so much to say about myself, rather, talking about myself and my life in such a small space means I need to identify the most defining aspects of myself and how I’ve spent the last 20 years on this earth. I can say with confidence that I cannot confidently say I know what those are. I had always been a wallflower. My opinions were simply a reflection of whoever was speaking to me, and to describe my true self was akin to describing the color of a mirror. Ironically, I had simultaneously held a feverish desire to break away from the mundane and seek undiscovered beauty. I was often called the “creative” one whenever I was in a situation that involved art or expression because I was never satisfied with taking the obvious path and becoming forgettable. I wanted to take that path and mold it, twist it into something that was beautiful, yet made you question the reality of the path itself. Indirectly, it was that desire that got me into photography. I was going on a trip to China and my mom bought me a high-end point-and-shoot that I wanted nothing to do with. Since I was stuck with the thing, I forced myself to take a lot of pictures out of guilt for this “gift.” Of course, I didn’t want to just take pictures, I wanted to take GOOD pictures, or at least try to. Some might say being glued to your viewfinder while on vacation makes you “miss the moment,” but for me it magnified it. I started noticing things like complimentary colors, interesting perspectives, the behavior of light, and everything before me became richer. Since then, that lens became my third eye with which the world become so much more beautiful.
platformPHOTO: Your photographs come across as beautiful and somewhat haunting. To you, what makes a good photograph?
Christian Hopkins: I actually have a mini checklist that I go through when both creating and viewing photographs. It’s all still a bit amorphous, but I’ll assign a handful of attributes to a photograph, and I’ll like a photograph if each of those attributes are unique or engaging in some way. I usually start with subject matter (that’s pretty self explanatory), color, composition, perspective (that might not be the right word, but examples would be like a wide panorama or a tight crop of someones face or an aerial view of the ground), and a some others. Most importantly though are depth and purpose. Depth is the ability for you to get lost in a photo. Where all the prior attributes swirl together and draw you inside the image. These are the images that you just stare at, and you keep seeing something new the longer you look. I also feel a photograph can have a lot more power when it has a meaningful purpose behind it, but keep in mind that none of these are required. They’re just things that I try to change up with each photograph. Never have the same attribute twice in a row (of course not even I can follow these “rules” most of the time).
platformPHOTO: How do you articulate your ideas, from conception to creation and post-production? Tell us about your creative process.
Christian Hopkins: Most of my concepts start with an emotion, particularly one that I cannot explain or identify. I get extremely uncomfortable whenever I’m not in control, and it’s particularly unbearable when that loss of control is coming from something as personal as my own mind. When this happens, I usually sit down and try my best to put that emotion into words. For example, with my picture “Defense Mechanisms,”, my general words were: “I love photography, but I’ve reached a point where my personal expectations of my own work have exceeded my skill level. Now every time I try to take a photo, I get frustrated because I’m never satisfied with the result, but I can’t stop taking pictures because so many people are waiting to see what I’ll make next. It’s all so unbearable that I’d forever cut photography out of my life, remove something that is so close to my heart, just to stop feeling this.” And once the words are there the picture just kind of…appears.
platformPHOTO: How challenging is it to be working alone when creating often complex self-portraits?
Christian Hopkins: Yes…..very, very, yes. I use a remote shutter release, and up until recently, I had this dinky little infrared remote that had an effective range of 10 feet and you had to hit this sweet spot on the camera, so I would spend so much time staring numb at the camera while I futilely press this button and then suddenly the red light will go on and I have two seconds (and no this couldn’t be extended, I tried) to frantically pose, then wait, then *click.* I would have to run and check how the picture turned out after every shot because if I took a whole bunch of poses at once and I didn’t realize I was out of the frame, then all those pictures would be unusable. With some shoots taking hundreds of attempts because I’m a bit of a perfectionist, let’s just say I get a lot of exercise. Also, clamps are a solo self-portraitist’s best friend.
platformPHOTO: Can you give some information about the post-production process to create your images. Do you usually have a clear vision of what you wish to achieve during editing or is it something that happens while you are editing your images? Are there any particular techniques that you use?
Christian Hopkins: Most of the time the photograph is already finished in my before I even pick up the camera. I don’t usually even sketch anything out. I already know what it looks like. I’ve seen it. Taking the picture is just a formality. With my composites, I don’t really have a consistent technique because each one is so very different. What you might call a “technique” I would just call common sense. Start building the background, then cut out and add all the subjects, then match their hues and tones to the background, then overall touch ups, and finally start working with all the adjustment sliders to solidify the tone of the image.
platformPHOTO: Are there any photographers or artists working with other mediums that have been inspiration to you? Perhaps because of their style or the subject matter that they tackle within their work.
Christian Hopkins: Nope.
platformPHOTO: You started photography as a form of therapy in coping with depression, but now it seems as though this medium of expression has become a challenge in itself for you. Have you found that channelling your feelings through conceptual photographs has helped you in dealing with or understanding your depression?
Christian Hopkins: It’s the only tool I have in this fight. How do you fight an enemy you cannot touch, cannot see, and, most distressingly, is yourself? When I create a photograph, it is more than just an image. It’s the manifestation of some demon that has been haunting me to the point where I can no longer function. It’s then that I need to create this picture to take that demon out of my head and onto the screen in front of me. It’s strange, some weeks I’ll refuse to leave my bed because the smallest inclines become mountains, but suddenly it’s 4 in the morning and I’m running around a fog filled field camera in hand for hours trying to find the perfect place to compose this image that I already finished the moment I got out of bed. It’s the sense of control that leads me to create. It’s knowing that now I am the one now who is creating the image, I am the one who chooses what goes where, who does what, and why they do it. Being able to convey an emotion through something I create proves to me that I now understand this emotion enough to accurately communicate it to others.
platformPHOTO: Last week, you posted a blank image on your flickr account saying goodbye to your followers and that you have decided to give up photography, stating: “I can’t do this anymore….I’m at the point where my expectations have exceeded my capabilities…” Do you still feel this way and would you be able to elaborate on what brought you to this conclusion? Is there any chance that you may return to your personal photography in the future?
Christian Hopkins: Imagine a crowd of over 4 million people, and the spotlight’s on you. There they stand, far beyond the limits of your vision in an infinite black void, all waiting for you to say something, but of course you have nothing to say. Yet they do not budge, and the stillness starts to crush you. Every new moment in the growing silence pushes every word down your throat, and that silence grows stronger because of it, creating an eternal loop of suffocation. And you cannot run, you cannot escape into your mind, because this is your mind. The crowd is there when you sleep, when you eat. It’s under your skin and in your blood, and it drives you mad. That’s what it felt like, no matter how untrue or irrational it seems, that’s what it felt like. Sometimes it would get to the point where I would just hold onto my camera and rock back and forth for hours. That is why I had to stop, but I’m still here, and I’m not done. I’ve found new ways to communicate these emotions through images, and they’re silently screaming to get out.
platformPHOTO: Thank you so much for your time today Christian, we have one last question for you. If we sent you to a desert island and allowed you to take only one picture with you by another photographer, what would this image be?
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