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#even tho its sunday lmao
ceruleanharley · 2 years
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baby ❤️
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malewifetrainee · 2 years
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i am going 2 cry im stuck alone with 🧚‍♀️them🧚‍♀️
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minimoefoe · 7 months
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found out yesterday that I have covid and honestly getting it this far in when I don't even leave the house or see anyone is just embarrassing like how did this happen
#natchats#started feeling a bit shitty on Saturday#like i could feel a sore throat coming on#and then i woke up at like 3am and couldnt get to sleep for an hour which was just more annoying than anything#and then i spent most of sunday napping#which is like#its not unheard of for me to nap#but i was in bed from basically when i wome up at 8ish until about half4 when i decided to take a shower in the hopes it would wake meupabit#then yesterday i was saying how me and my friend might do something this week#and my mum was like you better take a covid test just in case#(which she says basically any time anyone of us even feels mildly unwell)#and i was like yeah better do#but i was like itll probs be fine like ive just got a cold#but then the test was positive and i was like ummmm what#which thinking about it now its like yeah bitch when has a cold EVER made me sleep for a day??? never#sunday was the worst bc i was in bed and had a bad throat and headache#and also my period to top it off#yesterday i didnt feel as bad but i gained a bitch of a cough that i still have today#but i didnt nap yesterday (tho i did go to bed a bit earlier (not to sleep just to lay there and watch sex ed lmao) which i dont do often)#in terms of how i got it either my dad brought it home from the pub or my mum brought it home from work. my dad has been mildly ill recently#but i feel like if it was covid he woulda been more unwell than he was#so idk maybe they just carried it home to me as a gift#or maybe i walked past someone a bit too closely on a walk last week#unlikely bc i tend to try and avoid ppl on walks#i went on a walk yesterday in the hopes the fresh akr would be good. it did for a bit tbf but i think i stayed out longer than i#shouldve and just tired myself out lmao#i also Obviously kept far away from ppl#luckily there wasnt many ppl about#and when there was it was easy to get away from them
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kuiinncedes · 1 year
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not the week before spring break for me having a project due and three midterms within 72 hours 😭🫠💀
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Man, what a fucking week
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Lol how do i explain this chain of events...
there's no way i can make it brief xD So..today i was in an odd mood, feeling so sensitive that any time someone talked to me i almost flinch from how overwhelming it is. And a certain heaviness. sunday is slimbo's only day off tho so i wanted to hang out. We decided to draw, and as we were finishing setting up i suddenly remembered my stereo & how i havent used it all winter. i grabbed it from my room n put it on slimbo's bedroom floor , i was sitting next to it as we focused on drawing for a few hours n listened to CDs.
then as we were about to eat dinner slimbo suggested we watch sopranos. i was reluctant due to my mood today, and ok hear me out: Something about sopranos has like, consistently felt really psychic to me, cus i dont watch it that often but every time i do it's like. that episode will be freakishly synchronized w something happening in my life at that moment. usually in a metaphorical way. Could just be power of suggestion but ive never rly had that with a show before except for a few animes.
ANYWAYS..i agreed to watch it because i felt it to be fateful that slimbo suggested it. like Ok what message is this supposed to send me today, might as well see since i'm already in this strange mood. We sat on the ground where i was drawing and started watching. and ofc, (spoiler warning,) ofc the last ep we watched was the one where junior shoots tony, so this episode is the one where tony's dying in hospital (and having his prolonged dream sequence). Which, if you know me, you maybe know about my Core Wound, but if you dont, well, it definitely involves hospitals and death and fathers. So i'm just sitting there watching like LMAO 🙂 Ok Guess this is what's on tonight's agenda Let's Gooooo 🙂
and i can see slimbo keeps looking at me with an expression like "we can turn it off" but i was like nah im going to watch this im curious now. (i havent seen season 6 of sopranos in 6 years and its the season i have the least memory of because when i watched it i was high as fuck on opiates due to getting my appendix removed (awful experience) so it kinda feels like my first time seeing it). i keep watching and THEN. THE WEIRDEST SHIT OF MY LIFE OCCURED
the fucking scene. Where carmela's in the hospital room with tony and she receives a stereo from chris. she takes it out of the box and i'm like wait....it's only showing the back of it at first, but it looks so familiar, i look over to my right where my stereo is coincidentally sitting on the floor next to me with the back facing me. it's the same. then i see her open the cd slot. ITS THE EXACT SAME FUCKING STEREO SAME color SAME model SAME Everything !!!! and the part that freaked me out most is that my stereo is always just sitting on top of my tv i almost never move it even when i use it but at that moment it just happened to be sitting there on the floor RIGHT FUCKING NEXT TO ME !!!
idk. it gave me kind of an adrenaline rush. it freaked me out. like that is bizarre i dont know. especially with the context of the stereo in the show and how it's there in the hospital to play music for tony as he's basically dying. hospital scenes r always like, intense for me on a cellular level. but that just kinda blew my mind. i got this stereo from a thrift store 2 years ago i had no idea it was in the show lol. IDK. i feel like there's a message here. something to do with my dad and healing and music. See im telling you like.....sopranos makes me consistently feel that God is joking around w me, its ususlly just a feeling but today it was tangible. so.... o_o
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valeskafics · 1 year
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Headcanons for being Roommates with Modern Robb Stark, Jon Snow, and Theon Greyjoy (and they are crushing on you...)
can be read in connection with my crossover story time after time or separately (though the Jon ones would not necessarily be correct for TAT as he is not a love interest there)
-the four of you have been best friends for as long as you can remember
-Jon has always been the mother hen, making sure you don't get into too much trouble, smarter than people give him credit for and kind of your unofficial leader, has just gotten out of a long term relationship with his ex Ygritte when all y'all get your place
-robb has always been the sweet, heartthrob friend, but completely unlucky in relationships - has had his heart broken by Jeyne poole, talisa maegyr, AND Roslin frey (they all dumped him bc of YOU lmao, he's oblivious to the fact that he's in love with you)
-theon is a menace, he's a tramp, he has a constant stream of girls and guys in and out of his life, commitment phobe, loves partying, hates his family except his sister yara, definitely smokes a shit ton of weed
-after graduating high school, you end up all moving in together, I mean you're BEST FRIENDS, it only makes sense right?
-living with the three of them is.... chaotic to say the least
-the brothers share a room and you share a room with theon
-robb is SOOOO FUCKING MESSY like looking at him he's so clean and well kept but his side of the room looks like a tornado hit it
-Jon is anal on the other hand and tries to keep his side tidy
-you and theon are pretty average cleanliness wise, you're probably a bit cleaner than he is though but y'all don't have screaming matches over it like the brothers do
-Jon gets so annoyed with y'all because you'll be saving up for a new microwave and then the three of you will come home having bought like fuckin' beanbag chairs
-Jon labels the food everyone has bought (theon eats whatever the fuck he wants tho)
-theon likes walking around naked, says every day should be casual Friday, doesn't really bother Jon but you and robb are like..... pls (though you ARE looking.... respectfully)
-robb is mainly in charge of cooking and he's surprisingly really good at it, you're his unofficial taste tester (he does it because he just loves feeding you and hearing you compliment stuff he's made, he's a malewife in the making)
-game nights every Sunday, no exceptions, no boyfriends or girlfriends allowed, its bestie time!!
-they all hate every bf or gf you've ever had, no one is good enough for you apparently
-theon and you do a skincare routine together every night before bed, robb and Jon are too lazy
-Jon is the only one with a car so he always drops you off at uni and work, refuses to let you walk or take the bus
-constantly having friends crash in your living room whether its gendry or Loras or marg or dany or whoever
-there's a swear jar and it's always full because even if you guys TRY to abide by it, that shit does not work
-you definitely catch robb coming out of the shower a few times and are surprised by how shy he is about it, like he has a nice body (and when you tell him that he's like :O omg does she like me like me?? do I like her like her?? HOLY SHIT IM IN LOVE WITH HER AHHHHH)
-theon figures it out one night when you guys are just up late talking about something really stupid and he looks over at you and is like.... is this the reason ive never been able to be in a relationship? oh shit...... I CAUGHT FEELINGS NONONONONO MISSION ABORT
-Jon knew already. that's why he broke up with Ygritte, when he figured it out, he's come to terms with the fact that he's going to be in the friend zone unless something drastic happens but he's too sweet on you to try and move on
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fanartdoodledumpster · 4 months
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Ok so I was able to do like 3 of the prompts—I’m probably not going to finish the rest until tomorrow so that’s rough.
BUT ANYWAYS
Top Left is Monday prompt (Saints or Ghosts) and I said lmao why not both but make it angsty—specifically ran Where Can I Run (reprise) in my head over and over again too think of this one. I always thought the eye imagery thought the musical was sick so like why not make it the ghosts and saints. It was super fun messing with brushes for the Quincy’s wing tho—Vincent calling Quincy angel lives in my head rent free :’)
Top Right is Thursday prompt (Self-made or socially constructed) and I chose Ambrose bc it was between him and Beatrix and I already had Beatrix for another piece and besides I wanted to draw the golden boy mwahahaha. Anyway, the scene where Vincent describes how Ambrose makes art with perfect precision and how Vincent makes art in a more messy way also lives in my head rent free and I thought it would be cool if I didn’t make something super concise with my lineart, with a painted vibe for color, and only gold (bc golden boy)—oh and then the blood showed up and honestly it all just checks out.
Bottom is Sunday prompt (pre-freshman year or post graduation) and how could I not do post grad when the Other Side of failure lives in my head rent free :’) I’m not really happy with it that much—I’ll probably finish it later but I do like the textures/colors that I pulled and am super happy with the overall design.
Hopefully I’ll get the Tuesday, Friday, and Saturday prompts up before the end of fan week but idk if I have the time to do the Wednesday one lmao—but even if its late Imma still post it bc I already have drafts of them all done and I need to draw more Beatrix bc they’re just so neat teehee
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meowzfordayz · 2 years
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Hi 🥺 I would like to request some fluff headcanons with Giyu/Sanemi, based on the very first time you show each other your vulnerabilities. You may interpret this any way you want, it could be a conversation, physical touch, letting go of a hard facade (hello Sanemi), I would just be very happy to read your interpretation of this! Thank you 💙
Tyvm for your request! ☺️ I appreciate knowing I could interpret it any way I wanted, bc it def took a while for inspo to strike regardless. 😅 Hope you're having a wonderful weekend: may your Sunday be sunny and spectacular. ☀️💖
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Author’s Note: what is ~hcs other than an informally written one shot ????? 🤪
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firsts - rendered speechless
Shinazugawa Sanemi x Reader, Tomioka Giyuu x Reader
Word Count: ~2,100
CW: explicit language, mild sexual content, traumatic references
~faqs, image~
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W/ you, Sanemi talks a lot
Like, actual, proper talking
Not just being pissy lol
Asking how you slept, complimenting your occasional smile, venting about what’s annoying him atm
There’re very few ppl he feels safe being… normal (??) w/
Bc actual, proper talking can be ~hard 😵
So even tho some of the things he rambles about may seem mundane
They’re his subtle way of revealing his comfortability, his trust, in you
In fact, the more mundane, the more intimate ??
He prob despises small talk
So like: if he mentions the weather, then you know he’s ✨smitten✨
Bc w/ you, nothing feels like small talk
W/ you, he believes you’re genuinely intrigued, fascinated, enthralled
Believes you care about knowing him
Him in general, and him in the moment — in every moment
—Do you know how heartbreaking it is to open up to someone who doesn’t give a fuck ??
—Personal anecdote: an ex of mine admitted that they weren’t usually interested in what I had to say so they’d tune me out, and then I dated them for another ~yr lmao
—Live and learn
Investing in someone, in a romantic relationship, doesn’t just mean investing in them
It also means letting someone invest in you
The more you give, the deeper they can affect you
The more you give, the less you have to hide behind
And Sanemi is hyper aware of this
As are you !!
—I don’t exactly imagine a romantic relationship w/ Sanemi being slow burn
—But it’s not a whirlwind either
—The slowest part is trudging through the (mutual) friendzone
—Him friendzoning you bc: better to be the one friendzoning than the one friendzoned, right ??
—And you friendzoning him bc: you assume he’s off limits romantically (his glaring doesn’t scream LOVE ME right off the bat, yanno?), so why trouble yourself w/ that inevitable heartache ??
—Dw, obvi y’all figure it out ~eventually 🙃
Which def leads to you talking less
Not bc you’re passive!
And not bc he talks over you !!
You just absolutely treasure the closeness nurtured w/ every word he utters
Sure, easy silences are considered a hallmark of a mature, developed relationship
Which is true w/ Sanemi as well
BUT, what’s also true is the difficulty vulnerability he typically has w/ expressing himself
Not just romantic, cheesy expression altho that shit’s SCARY
But literally like, what he ate for lunch and that he misses you
Or what he wants to do after sparring bathe together bc y’all are sweaty af and he just wants to cherish you and your body
Or what he needs from you when he wakes up, phantom pain shackled to his skin, glistening scars its keeper contrary to intuition: touch them, trace them — remind him of his wholeness even as you grieve his loss
So you talk less, bc you want more
More, more, and more of Sanemi
As much as he’s willing to give
Is how much you’re willing, happy, grateful to love
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“I should go.”
Everything is seeped in grey
Not the pastel grey of Sanemi’s laughter
Or the warm grey of his desire
Or even the neutral grey of his exhaustion
This grey is
Calculated
Painted over a razor thin sheen of crimson
An unforgiving, flickering that you’d almost forgotten
That you’d hoped you’d never see
Again
“I…” he shakes his head, softly
Too softly
“I knew I’d hurt you.”
“Nemi, what is-”
“Listen to your heart, and tell me it’s okay,” he’s frowning, despondent moonlight faintly illuminating the curve of his bare chest, “Lie to me.”
You blink sleepily, your jaw propped up on your palm, “Can we talk about this after we’ve gone back to sleep? And slept? It’s the middle of-”
“I know it’s the middle of the night,” he snaps, “Which is why I should go,” he gestures roughly at your face, “You’re crying.”
“Sanemi,” you’re firmer now, kakebuton rustling as you move to mirror his upright position, “Of course I’m crying,” he flinches, unrecognizable shame stuttering his breath, “When you cry,” you reach out, fingertips resting on his clammy shoulder, relief spreading through to your elbow, your collarbone, your sternum when he doesn’t shrug you off, “I cry with you.”
“I’m not crying.”
You’d giggle if you weren’t so exasperated — so desperate to adjust his perception
He’s just so stubborn and clueless and battered and I’m so in love with you it’s ridiculous
“Let me look out for you, just as you look out for me,” you murmur, rubbing feather light circles along his throat, feeling as he swallows thickly
Let me love you, just as you love me
“How many nights have I woken you?” he’s unnervingly calm, “How many nights have I been a mess?” he snorts, “Most of them? All of them? You share a bed with a broken stranger. A patchwork of not good enough. You cry for someone false. For someone who doesn’t exist. Who only exists in the fleeting seclusion of us. But us can’t exist out there,” he grasps your thigh, squeezing reassuringly even as he wrings his own heart, “We can’t exist here either.”
“To love is a choice, Sanemi,” he grunts at your statement, “Are you taking that choice from me?”
His grip on your thigh tightens, harsh denial of your question in his gut
“Maybe love itself isn’t always born from conscious will, but to keep loving? To keep tending, to keep trying? How could you ever be a broken stranger to me? I know how to find your favorite constellation, can prepare your tea perfectly, have a mental map of your ticklish spots, and you talk with me. I know the three shadows that haunt your eyes, and how to dissipate them; that you stare into puddles because you think they’re shiny and pretty; that you fold a paper crane every year, scared it’ll be your last. I listen to you. Why should you go when I want you to stay? When you want to stay? I’m not hurting because of you — I’m hurting with you. We can exist. We do exist. We exist and we care and talk and listen and hurt and love. Yesterday, I woke up and I chose you. This morning, I woke up and I chose you. And when I wake up tomorrow, I’m certain I’ll choose you. How can something so consistent, so intentful, so solid be false?”
A long second, minute — minutes, pass
You’re patient
Listening
Interpreting tender promises in the quiet
I don’t know
Sanemi’s spine gradually relaxes, eyes losing their erratic glimmer as he melts into your steadiness
I don’t know
Your body following his as he settles beneath the kakebuton, curling familiarly around his weary form as he presses his toes tentatively to your shins
I don’t know
His hand waiting for yours as you sling a secure arm over his side, his fingers loosely interlocking with yours as soon as they nudge against each other
I don’t want to go
The cadence of your pulse guiding him
My beacon he kisses your knuckles My Polaris
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I think part of the reason Giyuu’s less talkative is bc it’s much easier to be articulate in one’s head than out loud
~Totally relatable 😝
Pair that w/ social—general—anxiety, and it’s even more understandable why someone (Giyuu) might be less talkative
But that obvi doesn’t make them (Giyuu) any less fascinating 👀
Ever crushed on someone from so far of a distance that you wonder if you’re imagining them?
And then they pop up at your local supermarket or something and you realize all over again that
They exist
They’re breathtaking
They don’t know you exist (at least, they don’t make a habit of greeting your existence)
Yeah
That’s you w/ Giyuu
Your admiration isn’t completely unwarranted or unreasonable 😅
As a fellow Hashira, you’ve absolutely earned your place, your right to stare at him during Hashira meetings
And, as a fellow Hashira, you carry the weight of those before you
Every night, you count them on your fingers, quickly segueing into the fog of your memories
Because you don’t have enough fingers for all the faces—for all the beginnings without middles, ending too abruptly—you swore to remember
A process, a ritual, an oath: your feeble, desperate grasp on your humanity
That takes most—all—of the night
Every. Night.
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“[y/n]-san.”
Tomioka-san ??
“[y/n]-san,” he repeats, “Can you hear me? Are you that tired?”
“Tired?” you mean to retort sharply, but you mumble instead
“Are you sleeping?” he asks
You swoon at his sternness
Internally, ofc 😌
“I think this is the first time you’ve willingly talked with me,” you grin lopsidedly
He has the grace to look away, his visible ear tinged red at the truth of your quip
“I’m sorry for that,” he’s unexpectedly soft, fingers clenching and unclenching nervously, “[y/n]-san, are you sleeping?”
“Not currently,” you shrug, rolling your eyes amusedly
—When I tell you Giyuu is flabbergasted rn… like, how tf is he supposed to maintain a convo w/ you when you’re just shitposting every sentence ?? This is why Giyuu’s less talkative 😂
—It’s not entirely your fault tho !! You haven’t slept properly in like, ~months ☹️
“Okay, currently you’re awake,” his tone swells with irritation, “But in general. Are you okay? Because you…” he hesitates, belatedly realizing his next remark’ll reveal more than he intended, “You looked ready to pass out during the meeting.”
You blink at him, the significance of his observation fluttering past your sleep deprived guard—unnoticed—as his question Are you okay? sinks slowly, gradually, eventually to the bottom of your haze
“I’m not okay,” you nod obliviously, “Too busy counting.”
Shit
You’re exhausted, but
Shitshitshit
Please don’t-
“Counting?” you’ve—unfortunately—piqued his interest They’re not okay?
“Yeah, 1, 2, 3, 4,” you drawl, almost playful
Thing is, Giyuu knows that trick
Knows every damn trick in the book
how to handle shit on your own 101
how to push others away because you can handle shit on your own 202
how to make others believe you aren’t pushing them away—they just prefer solitude—so you don’t have to acknowledge how poorly you’re “handling” shit on your own 303
And he also knows
You can’t unread a book
Can’t unsew the threads of arriving too late, being too weak, surviving you and only you without accidentally tearing a necessary stitch
Can’t unmuddle the mud without sacrificing its thickness, its heft, its muddiness
There’s a fine line between nurturing new roots, and losing the very plant itself
So he doesn’t push you
Doesn’t force himself into your state of mind
Doesn’t fake nonchalance or concern
“Tomioka-san.”
You grimace at the way his name floats needily off your tongue, a whimper jammed in your constricting throat
He’s awestruck
He’s touching you
Barely
The quietest graze of heat
Prior to his contact, you would’ve bet against him having gentle, careful skin
And you would've lost
—You expect him to be… cooler, glass, the void connecting the stars
But warmth—his warmth—smoothes the numb tiredness beneath your eyes
The boldness of his gesture negated by the kind tentativeness, innocent curiosity, familiar worry in his searching gaze
“Breathe, [y/n]-san.”
You choke out a messy, endeared laugh at the irony of his steady reassurance
Am I really a Hashira? Breathe? I should breathe?
“Don’t you have somewhere to be?” you mutter
He pauses, confusion flitting across his expression at the sudden tautness in your eyes, “I do.”
“Okay…” you raise an eyebrow, certain that you’re pulling away from his caress, “So go.”
In actuality, you’re caught in his openness, savoring the closeness of his heart
He doesn’t move
The lightness of his thumb still pressing faintly, tenderly, into plush of your cheekbone
Oh?
Does that… am I… is this…
“If I’m allowed to stay,” he murmurs, “Then I’ll listen.”
What. What does that. Huh?
He traces the hollows of your sleepless nights, sees himself in their swollen fatigue, knows without doubt, reluctance, fear that you’re racing
Racing toward a bitterness that stabs at the backs of his knees
A bitterness that doesn’t deserve you
A bitterness that, he decides in a split second, he’ll do ~anything to prevent from overtaking you
“I used to count too,” he confesses
Hoping, hoping, hoping
That he’s using the right key
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illfoandillfie · 8 months
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Hello! For your sat/sunday sleepover, how about your top 5 roger fics that you have ever read? 😊
(Id probably say all of mine are written by you lol)
Okay first of all you're so sweet to say that! Secondly this was a tough one. I've not read any roger fics recently so all of these are ones that have stuck in my head from back in the day lmao. Also, they're in no particular order. Also i've linked them where possible.
Ask Nicely from the Try Series by just-my-sickly-pride I mean the whole try series is incredible and i still think about it on the reg, but this was the first roger chapter and its top fucking tier. If you're into brian as well and havent checked out this series i HIGHLY recommend it will make you both very wet and also crush your heart (god the brian sexting chapter changed my brain chemistry)
The Art She Loved by brian-maybe-not - Winter was an absolute genius for writing this and I'm so sad she's not active anymore because holy shit she could write. Maybe I'm a little biased since she was one of my first friends in this fandom but I've literally contemplated printing this fic out and binding it like a proper book because that's what it deserves. It's fucking art.
Pretty Little Present by 90sbrianmay - Unfortunately I can't link this one because Ezra deactivated a little while ago. I'm also potentially a little biased because this was the fic she wrote for me for a fandom secret santa so it was literally made for me lmao. Fuck it was hot though. Ezra was the absolute queen of threesomes tbh (also she had another one who's name escapes me but reader was brian's daughter he'd only just found out about and she cornered roger backstage at an event to seduce him and it was soooooooooooo hot)
At first glance by queenmylovely - listen, i could not make a list like this and not include something written by Lauren (even tho maybe her ben fics are what im more likely to go back and read dhskksjfs). At first glance is so so so good and sweet and cute and ugh it just made me fall so in love with roger and it's a criminal crime if you haven't read it yet.
Diamonds and Pearls by redspecialty - C came up with so much good shit, she really fed us there for a hot min, but diamonds and pearls is like the ultimate sugar daddy rog fic. it's a whole ass 15k (god if you thot my fics were long khfksfkfjs) and it just hits all the right notes.
also as a bonus i have to shout out Be My Pet by mypassionfortrash because its just delicious and i've defs gone back to it a few times. And also 10 Easy Rules by stormtrprinstilettos which is incomplete but hhhhhhh rog is so mean in it and i think about it so often
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greypetrel · 10 months
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Beh, I'm bored. Che ne dici di [ SCAR ] for the prompt game? (Lmao now I'm mixing both languages, il cervello è davvero stanco XD)
LOL chiedimi se avevo capito fossi/parlassi italiano. Because I DIDN’T. Ma buonasera! xD And don’t worry for the mix, it’s perfectly fine, pidgins are the best. u_u
Sorry for being late, I didn’t forgot! Again, this took me a while to mull over and think about it… But after much much musing, I decided to delve back into DadWolf AU, interpret it metaphorically and well. It’s angst.
Angst with a bog unicorn. Enjoy, here’s a glass of iced tea.
Somewhere Only We Know. (🎶)
[ SCAR ]:          noticing a scar on the receiver’s skin, the sender tentatively stops them from covering it up, and rests a gentle, soft kiss over it.
When they got back from Minrathous, bringing down a friend who was in need of help, they all knew they would have needed time to cope and digest what happened. And after all it was only natural that they couldn’t have taken it well: they had to abruptly cut off their research, take what they could and jump on the first plane, leave everything they worked for in the last years behind and start from scratch. Felix didn’t know anyone in Ferelden beside the two siblings, had a dime to his name, name he couldn’t use without them all being discovered and followed by mages that weren’t as amiable and good natured as he was, and was also, incidentally, terminally ill.
Knowing their different ways to cope with emotions and grief, nothing was exactly a surprise.
It was no surprise noticing how Aisling retreated back in herself academically, refused to do anything substantial and veered her career towards something she liked, but was very inconsequential to a better good. She faced everything on stubbornly and took too much responsibilities, was in the Hospital as much as she could and worked in the weekends to pay for her own rent, refusing to just go back to the family house if not to visit. She looked fine, but some times she just showed up uncalled for, curled on the couch between Solas and Varric and let them both comfort her, saying nothing and, sometimes, crying. That done, she was good to start back, and never backed up. As per her usual.
Dorian, tho, was a whole other matter. He didn’t give in academically and looked for a field of research that was close to what they were doing North. On his own, and with a different team, because no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t convince Aisling to jump back in, and Felix soon was in no condition to work continuously. Dorian went on nonetheless. Personally, tho, it was clear he was just swiping every negative emotion under a carpet, refusing to even admit there was something wrong. He went to visit Felix once, when it was clear his time was at its limit, and just held onto Aisling, offering her a shoulder to cry on, during the funeral. A small function, just them, the family that helped and some friends there for the siblings. Dorian didn’t cry, he just glowered at the coffin as if it was blaming it for everything. As per his usual.
They all knew that if Aisling appeared weak, the one they should look up more for was Dorian. They all knew he would have broken down, sooner or later. He always did, accumulating stress and bursting. It wasn’t a matter of if, it was a matter of when.
The when, it turned out, was a week after the funeral, in the form of a horse-transport van that let out a terrible stench, and parked in front of Varric and Solas’ house one Sunday morning.
“What’s the matter? Did you steal the content of a dumpster?”
Varric asked, stepping on the front porch and looking at his daughter, jumping off of the driver’s seat. It was Dorian, tho, to answer him, in a cheerful tone that was way too enthusiastic to be sincere, as he gingerly turned around the front of the track.
“We’re doing an experiment! Just for fun, like the old times… We need the back garden I think, can we? Of course we can, it’s not like you two are really going to build the swimming pool today, are you.”
He laughed, crossing past his sister and starting to unlock the doors of the back, humming between himself. Weird. Very, very weird. The dwarf exchanged a look with Aisling, still propped against the driver’s door, a silent question passing between them. She just shook her head, a sorrowful bent of her mouth telling him everything the dwarf needed to know before she walked back and started to help her brother.
“Did the garbage truck broke again?” Asked Solas, walking out of the door too, a mug of cocoa in his hand.
“Sparkler’s at his limit.”
“It was about time… Still doesn’t explain the stench.”
“I know as much as you do.”
They stood there, looking at the situation unfurling, ready to help at need. From the back of the truck jumped out a Qunari, panting grossly and loudly complaining that it was the most disgusting thing he ever did. Dorian just swatted every complaint, lamenting that for such a big creature he was surprisingly delicate, and urging them all to just get to work and stop losing precious time, tying a scarf around his nose and mouth and going on chatting about how science demanded strong arms and how it wasn’t a job for the weak of hearts.
The job not for the weak of hearts, was, apparently, dragging down the truck what looked like to be, in fact, the corpse of a black horse, lying on his side, flies buzzing all around and legs rigid that Aisling hat to gently bend to maneuver the hoofs out of the door, huffing loudly, a scarf on her nose and mouth as well, but not saying anything at all.
The horse -a poor, big beast who somehow met his destiny with a dagger crossing his head- got transported with difficulty by the trio, via a plastic cover the corpse was resting over, to the side of the house and in the back garden. Dorian kept on chatting with a glee that was very much unlike anything that was going on, the Qunari -Bull, he got called - replying with sarcasm to everything, and Aisling just silently working, casting glances at Dorian from time to time.
Both Varric and Solas follow them, half curious about what exactly he planned to do with a dead horse, half worried because if there was a shade of weirdness that felt like a scream for help, that was it.
But whatever the experiment was, it was for the siblings alone: when the horse finally was in a position that Dorian deemed optimal, he and Aisling started to chat, in a weird mix of Common and Tevene for the most practical things, circling the animal and discussing. The Qunari, without anything to add to the conversation and looking worried as well, stepped away and approached the pair of spectators.
He introduced himself to the pair as the Iron Bull, the mechanic working on Aisling’s car and owner of the garage on the ground floor of Aisling’s flat building. He was very pleased to finally meet the parents. He accepted something to drink –“Is that hot cocoa?”- and was good company, warming up a quite sceptical Solas too for a hour, before he had to get back to work and excused himself.
He patted Dorian’s shoulder, barely noticed if not physically, and earned a dismissive goodbye by a too concentrated mage. Aisling, tho, jumped up and hugged him tight, with a thank you, before getting back to work.
Qunari gone, the experiment went on as if the two siblings were on their own, with none the wiser and absolutely no neighbour peeking through the windows with big eyes. They all got unused to the experiments, in the years.
Solas, worried, went to offer his help when Dorian started evoking spirits, but Dorian harshly shooed away with the assurance that everything was perfectly under control and he didn’t need to worry, this was way past his comfort zone with spirits. Aisling, today’s silent interpreter and service sister, shook her head when Dorian wasn’t looking, preventing the older elf to reply and start a discussion. Again, damage prevented, the parents got the message that there was nothing they could do save going on with their life and waiting for the situation to unfold.
There was no talking him out for a pause or to stop to have lunch all together. He was in the zone, and not intentioned of stopping any time soon, hands working quickly and brain even faster, tension evident in the way he slouched forward and in the way his shoulders were contracted up to his ears. He hadn’t even insisted to have some sort of blanket, sitting on the grass without minding his clothes or his allergies. Which he never did. Varric brought them some sandwiches and a jug full of iced tea nevertheless - Aisling ate, Dorian didn’t. The afternoon went on like that, a frenzy foreshadowing a big, harsh fall.
When the sun was setting, finally, a neigh rose up from the backyard, loud and clear.
Solas and Varric exchanged one look and rushed back in the kitchen and out of the back door right into the garden.
The horse stood on its hooves, stomping confused and shaking his head -the sword was still planted in it. There were runes and glyphs on its flanks, most Nevarran but with some Tevinter and a couple of Elvhen in it, painted in red chalk. Aisling was standing in front of the animal -zombie?-, cooing soothingly and trying to calm the poor beast down. She managed, caressing his nose and patting his neck until it finally stopped neighing and stomping his hooves and breathing too quickly, with the soft voice she always used for horses, and a tired smile on her face.
“Chuckles-”
“I know.”
“The horse was dead.”
“I know.”
As Varric was totally creeped out, there was pride in Solas’ voice, the usual pride that hadn’t been there ever since the children moved out and moved their crazy experiments in a laboratory, out of the house. It was disconcerning, but the horse looked, indeed, alive enough to, slowly, take trust and start nuzzling Aisling’s hand as a normal horse would. Well, there were some issues for him in opening his mouth, but the animal clearly did his best.
“What- Is that… Normal? Possible?”
“Very difficult. But yes. I didn’t know he studied Necromancy of all things…”
“Necr- Oh, shit. Did he-?”
“No. There’s a Spirit inhabiting the horse. Not the original soul. Still, the body can move.”
The Necromancer, tho, in spite of the success, was still sitting on the grass on his butt, legs folded in front of him and back slouched forward and down, not looking at the horse but at his hands in his lap, totally frozen on the spot. A minute later, Aisling reached him, leaving the horse to explore the new surroundings and its new life as she sat beside him.
Their hands were dirty and the foul stench of dead horse soaked their very clothes. Dorian, tho, had lost every willingness to complain.
“He’s fine, I think. What about Ugo? Ugo the Unicorn.” Aisling proposed, scooting close so they were side by side on the grass, shoulders and hips touching.
“Whatever, I don’t care. It’s yours if you want him, I… I just needed to know that-”
He snorted, shaking his head harshly as he grimaced, not concluding the sentence.
“I know, Dor.”
“I could have saved him.”
“You couldn’t have, Dor. That’s not the horse. There was nothing to do.”
“There’s always something to do… If I… If we-”
His voice broke, and her heart as well, all over again.
“We helped him as we could, Dor. We got him out, we were with him until the end. He knew, he never blamed you, he wouldn’t blame you now.”
“I’ve been a coward. I left him alone, and-”
That’s when Dorian started to cry, breath strangled as he unfolded and bends forward, curling on himself and sobbing loudly. Aisling was there to catch him - she had waited that moment ever since he had showed up to her flat, entering with his key and had explained the experiment to her, she was surprised it took so long. She hugged him tight, dragging his bust against hers and holding him as tight as she could. She started to cry too, for company.
“It’s ok. It’s ok. He knew. It’s ok. You did your best, and it was enough. He wasn’t alone.”
He unfurled and hugged his sister back, bawling in her shoulder, months of pressure and regrets and fear finally catching up with him, all together. There was no undoing what happened: the work they had done for the wrong people, in good faith, the escape, running back in the night like thieves, a luggage full of notes and papers prioritized over clothes and personal belongings. A PhD totally lost and to be gained again from scratch, and bringing Felix with them knowing they had no money and his days were counted. Starting from zero and separating in work for the first time. It all had left a scar, in both of them: they just had different ways to manifest it, different ways to cope, and different ways to help the other with it, of metaphorically healing the hurt with a kiss.
And for the first time in years since they left, dragged inside by Solas and Varric who were there too to catch him, coax him to have some dinner and take a shower and coze up all together on the couch, with a movie and blankets. For the first time in years they weren’t alone.
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ainomica · 9 months
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Not the same anon but I did watched Elemental last Sunday I was hesitant at first because Hollywood films nowadays have the female main character be "perfect," like R*y, Captain M*rvel etc., and they don't prioritize the romance, then just end the film with the main character be single and alone since it makes them "strong." I was pleasantly surprised when the film introduced Ember and she has such a bad temper to the point that she explodes. When I saw these first few scenes of her, all I could think about is "Oh I am gonna like this film." I was also pleasantly surprised when there was so much Wade/Ember scenes and making it quite romantic. The whole time I was crossing my fingers and telling myself "Please let them be together in the end." And they did! No matter what the film is about, I can, most of the time, trust Pixar to produce films with an appropriate ending (not sure about Lightyear tho lol).
LOL yeah Pixar 's great quality is that once they figure out what works storywise, they rarely deviate from it in the extreme too much which is a good way for guaranteed profits. In terms of romance the good news is that other people have figured things out for them already they only have to write it without too much hiccup and voila!
Also I definitely see a more mature and well written version of what Rey COULD have been but was not. Like I said earlier, Ember is a great example of how to write a character with unlikable traits and still make them someone you can like and want to watch/read about. When she gets angry, the plot treats her anger as both a sympathetic reaction and also disproportionate to the situation around her. She also never takes her feelings being regarded as more important than other people's for most part and when she does she eventually is sorry about that.
I also like how they wrote Wade. Its one of the true thing about the world that emotionally mature and stable people who come from a happy life background tend to give the most emotionally sound advice. The trope of a emotionally f*cked up character being treated right because they are more traumatized no matter what idiotic advice they give is kind of bullshit LMAO( cough* fanfics writing Rey screaming and whining about how wrong Ben is to "AbOnDon" his parents after the crap they did to him and even judge him as the wrong one*cough)
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littlecarmine · 2 years
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hello I saw you mention in tags on that bangin' @gothprentiss gifset that if JJ/Emily is an unrequited situation, then it's JJ whose love is unrequited. I'm into this convo! It makes a lot of sense to me, esp with "200" in mind. If you want to elaborate, I'd love to hear your thoughts.
hi and happy sunday!! im sorry for taking so long to answer but I LOVE this ask and wanted to have enough time to answer it :)
I didn't go into examples of jj being into emily bc I think its obvious lmao from emily's firsts eps when jj is so interested in emily, even more than other team members. this is all about who better fits the yearning, unhappy, pathetically pining stereotype that a lot of fics make emily sdjkfhk
ive always thought if anything happened between jj and emily, emily would've been the one who ended it. esp bc I don't see emily as cheating so it would have to be before jj got serious with will. around that period emily would be readjusting to life after doyle and probably pushing away anyone when it got too deep.
based on that, it would make sense if emily was a little wistful in 3x17, but that's literally all we see of her ✨yearning✨. shes protective of jj and dropped everything to save her, but even tho I ship jemily, u could argue emily is like that with all the team. and with her personality, I don't see emily spending years in love with someone who doesn't love her back. she gives off this energy of confidence and being mostly happy with her life. not that shes not introspective and regretful at times- she is!!!! and I could see her thinking back to jj and wondering "what if", but it'd be brief.
JJ.... skjdfhsk. I love will but JJ seems mostly unhappy in her life with him (even before j***). their entire relationship is him supporting HER and shes focused on their kids lmao. which is fine but my point is that their relationship is one-sided. im also thinking of s12 when shes home with will and admits she knows its not always easy to have her around, and he doesn't argue it. I think that sums up their relationship. she loves him but as the father of her kids. he carries the weight in their relationship
this is not even getting into her imagining emily coming to save her when shes married to will!!! emily never has a moment like that with jj. the closest thing is when she dreams of jj being attacked like the cop from interpol, but that was a professional relationship. and even if u hc that something happened between emily and louise- it would put jj on the same level as some other random relationship
basically emily is just living her life and jj would be the one who's miserable and damaged from it lmao. I personally think its requited and love some jemily angst, but it has to be mutual!!!
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xxfangz · 6 months
Text
☆ ፧ 09/22/23 # FRIDAY
TW's : none — xtra photos at the end!
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[ 6:50 pm ]
im so tired omg. but its already almost 7pm so i cant sleep if i wanna have dinner soon lmao, my dads still napping but if i go to sleep ill sleep for so long,, so i made my tumblr look cute!! i got back from GSA about 2-ish hours ago and ive been laying down since. im supposed to work on my room some tonight, hopefully i can!
i got some schoolwork done earlier, it wasnt alot but it made me feel better about how im doing. i still have alot to do but progress is progress :) i got schoolwork done while i was in the counselors office because i was overwhelmed and didnt want to have any kind of meltdown,
usually id start my daily posts earlier on in the day but this is my first one EVERRR so. also the 3 images at top will hopefully be less random whenever i get in the hang of posting daily. idfk what the purple thing was in the middle 😭 i went to the gas station, looked down, and saw that it was so fucking weird
[ 9:04 pm ]
im eating pizza AND I HOPEFULLY GET TO DYE MY HAIR SOON IM SO EXCITED.
[ 9:20 pm ]
I JUST FINISHED EATINF AND ME AND MY DAD ARE GONNA WORK ON MY ROOM IN A FEW IM SO EXCITED HEHWEJJEJ that pizza was so damn good tho oh my godd im so excited though,, AND IM HOPEFULLY DYING MY HAIR SOON TOO IM SO HGAHAHAAJAJJ
[ 11:46 pm ]
I CLEANED SO MUCH. my feet are so sore from standing so much now im getting shocks of pain 😍. my room looks so nice now :) were gonna start redecorating it tomorrow night or sunday. im so tired omg im probably gonna lay down and scroll tumblr and listen to my fall playlist until im tired enough to sleepp! SPEAKING OF FALL. fall starts tomorrow according to my calendar. im probably going to sleep veryyyy soon since im tired and even more source trauma is resurfacing.
GAHHHHHHH!!! i have to take my binder off now i forgot i had it on. OKAY! end of my first entry :3
i may post little rambles and other posts later on in the night but this is the last of today's entry
GOODNIGHT / GOODMORNING TO YOU ALL!!
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moth--knight · 3 months
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HEY YOU!! DEAR FRIEND!! ANSWER ALL OF THOSE AO3 WRAP UP QUESTIONS!! (if you want... Lol)
HEY YOU!! I SHALL DEAR FRIEND!! THANK YOU FOR ASKING!! (under the cut tho cause this is long)
How many words have you written this year?
If my math is correct.....150k words. omg? last year it was 98.7k so I wrote more this year somehow. neat!
2. How many works did you publish this year?
Published 21, but worked on 24 since three of my fics were multichapters that I started last year :)
3. What work are you most proud of (regardless of kudos/hits)?
Hmm....probably a three way tie between superstition, severed, and sunday best. superstition I am proud of for actually attempting to write, since it is a proper multichapter with a plot and everything (lolsies). severed was a delight to write and I am very proud of how well I captured the elden ring character relationships despite being nervous to try. sunday best I am proud of because it was a risk to write in a VERY different fandom than I was used to, and I think I did a pretty ok job!!
4. What work of yours has the most hits?
desert hearts, with 3,429 hits. it is a thousand hits ahead of any of my other works haha. people really liked it ^-^
5. What work of yours got more feedback than you expected?
severed and wolves without teeth. neither got a ton of feedback, but I expected them to get none hahaha. so the handful of comments from people were really nice!!! OH and my yellowjackets fic, the world's the same, but something's changing. it got a ton of kudos, way above my average in my main fandom.
6. Favorite title you used
superstition, from the song of the same name by the band The Birthday Massacre. the song fits the fic and its themes perfectly. I also liked but this island's run by sharks, children's bones stuck in their jaws, which is a song lyric from I Love You by Fontaines D.C.
7. If you use song lyrics, which artist’s songs did you pull from the most?
I pull from a lot of random artists, but I think I pulled from Mannequin Pussy more than once this year. such an awesome band, everyone should check them out!!
8. Pairing you wrote the most for this year?
Bayonetta/Jeanne <3 same as last year!! it is funny to see my fic count for fandoms because Bayonetta definitely dominates. as she should. teehee.
9. Favorite pairing you wrote for this year?
Rosa/Jeanne, for my fic accelerate. it is such a unique dynamic, and writing a toxic and vindictive Rosa twisting the heart of a stubborn Jeanne was really exciting. Not a pairing I love or would write often haha, but it was the most interesting one I sunk my teeth into this year for sure.
honorary mention to Barbara/Melissa from Abbott Elementary. I always feel intimidated attempting to capture them faithfully in fics, but god I adore their dynamic. shoutout to the many very talented writers in the fandom!!
10. What work was the quickest to write?
I don't know, actually. almost all of my oneshots under 4k I wrote in one sitting over the course of an hour or two. I write pretty fast when I have an itch for a small idea. but I will say I wrote A LOT for superstition very quickly. the first five chapters were written before I started posting, and were all written within a month or two.
11. What work took you the longest to write?
definitely whistle lingers inside of your chest. it was a WIP from last year I finally finished after a long period of teeth grinding editing, and honestly I am still not 1000% happy with it. from start to finish it probably took me at least seven months. funny, since it is only 4k lmao.
12. How many WIP’s do you have in your docs for next year?
*shaky smile* well....................at least 15. ahahahahaha. superstition is obviously my "big project" with a planned 20 chs and might not even get finished next year. right now we are on ch 5, so we shall see. I have a lot of smaller oneshots planned and/or half written. mostly for bayonetta, but I have a few for abbott elementary, bloodborne, portal, and elden ring.
13. What’s your longest work of the year?
superstition. right now it is sitting at 25k and I have plans to release another ch before the year is out (hopefully!!). longest not-multichapter was severed, at 13k. shoutout to skelebotanicals for typing up the 90 HANDWRITTEN PAGES of that fic's first draft. a true hero.
14. What’s your shortest work of the year?
acquired taste, a silly gift fic for skelly. it was a whopping 397 words.
15. What WIP are you taking into next year with you?
superstition !! *crying screaming throwing up* but quite a few of my oneshots will definitely be done in the first few months of the year since those are all in the editing stages already and aren't too long.
16. What’s your most common “Additional Tags” tag?
hurt/no comfort, probably. sorry.
17. Your favorite character to write this year?
*in balder's voice* ROSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!! Bayonetta Origins gave us some more crumbs about her, so it was a delight exploring various facets of who she is/who she could be. the most fun characters to write are ones that are technically in canon, but essentially become OCs since so little is known about them imho. lolsies.
I also really enjoyed writing Barbara Howard for Abbott Elementary!! she is SO specific and such a delight to crack open.
18. The character that gave you the most trouble writing this year?
Malenia and Miquella. huge thank you to Wilmaa for giving me some advice when I was shaping their interactions in severed. and to be honest, Bayonetta herself!! I always find her difficult to capture, despite her being my favorite character. Or maybe that is why she is my favorite....hmm......
19. What’s one pairing you want to explore next year?
Chell/GLaDOS :D TOXIC ROBOT HUMAN YURI ! ! ! ! !
20. Which work of yours have you reread the most?
maybe king of silence? I just really enjoyed it. feel good with only a touch of angst.
21. How many kudos in total did you get this year?
I am too lazy to count. A couple hundred, probably. I write for small fandoms, so any interaction is a gift and a joy :)
22. Which work has the most comments?
desert hearts, of course. but I reply to every comment, so my comment count on ao3 is always half of what it says, since the other half is just me haha.
23. Did you do any collaborative works this year?
till death do us part, with dubhgloinne >:) what does it say about me that my only collab work is a raunchy smut fic published three days into the new year?
24. Did you write any gifts this year?
ya!!!! I wrote gifts for dubhgloinne, XilianX, Wilmaa, and skelebotanicals. I think six in total? I really enjoy writing gift fics, but they always make me nervous. what if the recipient doesn't like it !?!?!?!?!?
25. Did you receive any gifts this year?
YA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I received three this year, from Wilmaa, Dikhotomia, and TheValaxy. I feel very very very blessed that all of them wrote such wonderful fics and were kind enough to gift them to me......Wilmaa and Dikhotomia enshrined the best parts of desert hearts from their own perspectives, and TheValaxy reawakened my love and need and desire for Knight!AU bayojeanne. THANK YOU MY FRIENDS <3 <3
26. What’s your most common category?
F/F easily (lesbian moment!) but I have enjoyed writing more Gen works this year :)
27. What do you listen to while writing?
whatever music is itching at my skull in the moment. some artists this year I really loved and found motivating include Mannequin Pussy, Florence + The Machine, Rina Sawayama, Atarashii Gakko!!, the Nova Twins, Fontaines D.C, and King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard.
28. Favorite work you wrote this year?
that is like asking me to pic a favorite child.....guh. maybe accelerate. I really enjoy my weird fucked up AU fics. night, I stand walked to accelerate could run. the morgana/rosa fics were also fun tbh.
but honestly I really loved all of my branching out fics for other fandoms. sunday best + moon river for abbott elementary, severed for elden ring, wolves without teeth for bloodborne.....fond of them all.
29. Favorite line/passage you wrote this year?
literally anything from severed. I was really proud of the descriptions in that piece.
also, this opening bit from sunday best:
Melissa watches with bright eyes as Ms. Barbara Howard makes her way across the parking lot, smiling politely and greeting every person who crosses her path. The day is overcast, and the ground is still wet from the previous night’s rain shower, but that’s fine, because Barbara herself is brighter and warmer than any sun. She’s radiant in a modest dress the color of fresh cut daffodils, her usual pearls laid carefully about her neck, lips painted in a muted plum. It’s September, and starting to get chilly, but Barbara looks like summer, so much so that Melissa thinks she’d be just fine without the protection of her trusty leather. 
30. Biggest surprise while writing this year?
that I can branch out and write for other fandoms!! I was shocked at how I was able to find the unique voices for a lot of different characters outside of the bayonetta fandom....happy I took risks cause they paid off :) I think I also am surprised as just how much I have written haha. I love writing so much, and it is hard to believe I went so many years NOT writing for pleasure.
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breathplayed · 8 months
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17, 29, 48, & 55 😁🫖
oh u GOT me got me lets go
(17) what is your favorite line you’ve ever written? babe plz this one is too hard..... there's too many...... I HAVE 920K WORDS ON AO3 AND ~50K INCOMING I DONT EVEN REMEMBER THEM ALL......... uuhhhhhhhh ok ok ill try to narrow a few down. it's all gonna be recent tho bc that's what i remember most + i have rly been indulging myself stylistically as of late lmao
for just ~pretty language~ my favorites rn are
"Jimin is almost too pretty to mar with mortal hands, but Jungkook finds desecration is half the fun when his hands slip lower" (folie à trois)
"Some floodgate inside him has broken, the last bastion of resistance crumbled, and now he’s a drowning man in the dead waters" (folie à trois)
“I love you,” he whimpers into Taehyung’s kiss like a prayer. Too devout; Taehyung’s hands and lips pause. Jimin’s own lip is already trembling, caught, so he lets the confessional spill like it’s the last Sunday he’ll ever see." (the losing game ch17)
"[Taehyung] used to dream, sometimes, after Jimin was gone, that he was holding him again, that he could crack open Jimin's ribcage and crawl inside to make a home beside his heart before they burned together." (the losing game ch5)
"Sometimes—in his darkest moments, on his worst nights—Jimin dreams about Taehyung carving over each and every one of his scars. Creating clean new edges to each of them, prying fingers in the wound to be as close as possible, rewriting their memories and meanings with a jagged, almost unbearable intimacy." (the losing game ch17)
"The graves we dig ourselves are often the deepest." (the graves we dig..... now thats a real throwback huh)
there's too much i could say for dialogue but.... i'm super fond of the hurtful conversations present!vmin have in tlg (especially ch14, i reread that a lot), ignite the stars ch5 (also reread that a lot), and also i love pretty much everything that comes out of taehyung's mouth in folie à trois lol
(29) give us a spoiler for one of your stories. answered here, but since this one could be answered multiple times i'll bite......... my queue tag ("i'm glad it was queue") is a play on one of my favorite lines in all of tlg that i have been excited about getting to for yeaaaarrrssss. no one but me knows the line yet (or how hurtful its context is) bc it's in one of the final chapters hehehe but it's "i'm glad it was you" ..... :')
(48) do you reread your own stories? the answer to this used to be a strong NO!!!! but that has actually changed in the last two years! i don't rly reread anything older (my writing style has changed so much + there's things i'd change about older fics esp <2020 so it's not an enjoyable experience to me, i'd just fret over editing it) but there's some newer fics i reread bc they are So written to my own taste. i think i really improved a lot getting to write a bunch in lockdown lol + started caring less about whether ppl liked the fic and just wrote for ✨Me✨ so several of those recent fics i'm happy with and do reread sometimes like a stupid idiot narcissus
The ones i've reread the most are "sit, stay" + "sea legs" + favorite parts of "ignite the stars" and my favorite parts of "the losing game". the other scattered pwp's since 2020 have gotten reread about twice each. and i recently reread WBIO for the first time since writing it in early 2020!!! mixed feelings on that one bc i felt like i would change some parts of it if i wrote it today but that's a sign ur growing and improving i suppose
(55) do you have any abandoned WIP’s? What made you abandon them? oh i have so fucking many 'WIPs' it's not even funny. there's probably like ~12 completely bullet point outlined medium length / longfics in my docs down to exact dialogue i'd write, and dozens more fic attempts that have a whole plot and ending. bc as soon as i come up with an idea i already immediately know how i want it to end. which gives me way too many Plot Bunnies that are viable to be turned into fics!!!!! two years ago i made a list of every idea i thought should at least see the light of day in threadfic form if not an actual fic and it came out to 30 fics lol (and that was cutting it down to the essentials)
the thing is, very few of my WIPs are ever 'abandoned' in my mind, it's more like... i put them in my mental freezer. on hold / on ice. and some of them are closer to the front and get taken out and rotated around and worked on more often, while others are shoved to the far back of the freezer as i say "i'll make that someday" and forget it exists til the next time im reminded of it. there's only a few that i'd actually toss in the trash (aka truly abandon and never work on again).
the ones that are definitely abandoned in that i know i dont Want to write them are all on the more domestic romcom side (think like 'meaner than mean' or 'i like us like this') i know people like those but they're the hardest thing for me to write, those were the most annoyed i've ever felt while writing, i would literally groan out loud working on them, i am rly only happy writing conflict/angst or pwp lol
tbh, if i were to be realistic with myself, i'd say most of these wip's are 'abandoned' in that i probably will never get around to finishing them. but i dont want to call them abandoned because i do like the plots, and think ppl would like them, and want to share them!!! i just think they would suck / not be fun to write. Maybe Someday i will do an archival effort and work on translating as many of them as i can into threadfic form so they see the light of day in some format and are no longer abandoned to rot in my docs... bc there's no way that most of them are ever going to be written the way i wish i could do them justice :') and then i can abandon them knowing that ppl at least got to read a vague outline of what could have been
fun fact: i opened the aforementioned list of all these ideas to count and on one of them, a fic i've been poking at since 2018, i have the note "finish this or die" next to it. guess i know which one i've picked atp 🪦
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