Episode 138 - Unfair Ultimatum
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The couch theory. Bobby and Eddie's talk. I wasn't at my best at the time, needed to take a minute, she sat with me. The shared trauma of it all. Love being about stepping into someone else's mess and keeping them company in there; love being when you're at your worst and they're at their worst, you have every reason to give up and you still decide you wanna try again. And it's your mess now and you're the guy who likes to fix things and I'm the guy with the answers and I feel like she sees me and and and—Eddie not turning around when he sees Marisol, walking away instead. Buck on his couch, alone. Buck falling asleep on Eddie's couch, Christopher falling asleep there too, same scene, frame by frame. Every couple wearing blue and green throughout the season, getting darker as the relationship progresses. Y'all realise this all points to one thing only, right? You do realise that.
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contemplating posting my guinevere/elena oneshot, it's basically s3 ep6 (the changeling) but mostly from princess elena's pov (there's background merthur there but main focus in guinevere/elena)
i wrote it for my own self-indulgent purposes but...
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Rewatching "Navidad" and noticing right now that contrary to what I remembered, Esteban wasn't the only one who wanted to celebrate a traditional Nochebuena in the palace with just their family. Francisco did too! This is the very first Navidad since their reunion and Shuriki's defeat. Esteban has been waiting 41 (!) years for this day, and he probably thought it would never come. It must have hurt so much when his wish for a traditional family Navidad was immediately shut down by Elena and Luisa and (albeit a bit more conflictedly by Isabel) or that Francisco's agreement with his idea was disregarded.
It's especially intriguing to me, because ordinarily, you would expect Esteban to be all in on the exciting new Navidad celebrations. He can be stuffy and traditional, sure, but he's also extravagant and loves grand, elaborate parties. In this case, however, he vastly prefers a quieter, more intimate Navidad than something new and elaborate and exciting. He doesn't want fireworks or or parades or massive parties; all he wants is simple quality time with the family he spent four decades longing to somehow see again.
To borrow a few lyrics from "Let Love Light the Way," Esteban needs "nothing more than those [he] adore[s]" over the holiday. And it must rankle him so much to receive the seeming confirmation that this isn't enough for the others-- and I feel it could lend itself to the inevitable conclusion that he himself isn't "enough" for the others.
Personally, I feel like Francisco's desire to have their quiet, private Nochebuena celebration comes from a slightly different place than Esteban's. He's naturally a more traditional, reserved person, so he would always prefer simple quality time with his family than a grand function. Additionally, he did not perceive any time passing during the past 41 years, as Esteban did. So this particular Navidad would have less strong of a meaning to him as it did to his grandson who was all alone for four decades. I also do not think he would be fully aware of what this end of the Dark Times means to his grandson. But unlike the others, Francisco does seem to be genuinely trying to understand what Esteban is thinking and feeling.
And even knowing that Francisco can and will never fully understand, Esteban must have felt a little tiny spark of recognition and validation when Francisco too wanted to resume their regular Navidad traditions. These--and by extension, Esteban himself--may not have been "good enough" for Luisa or Elena. But for Francisco, the traditions were more than merely "good enough," they were his first choice.
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i’m constantly torn over how kisa would react to klaus
on one hand, what he did to katherine is so similar to what malvado did to her (treat her as his possession that’s owed to him, directly result in her turning into a vampire, kill her entire family, keep her in fear for centuries)
but on the other hand, her and klaus are so similar (victims of abuse. cursed. good humans who were turned into monsters by their curse. who did horrible things to break their curse. outsiders even amongst their own people. they’re even the same damn age lol)
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