#dont attack me i love them
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"Our souls are ancient,
They've seen the birth of stars,
Entire nebulae,
And yet you're the prettiest I've encountered."
(Yall I had so much fun with the coloring for this piece, I just wanted something light and sweet... plus my ex hated Shiro so I kinda wanted to do this as a fuck you to him :))
(Pls reblog if you save! <3)
#fanart#voltron art#voltron legendary defender#voltron shiro#takashi shirogane#shiro vld#keith kogane#vld keith#sheith#shiro x keith#keith x shiro#dont attack me i love them
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Just the idea of clone Danny and clone Talia working out much bette then him and Talia would confuse poor Bruce.
And best part all 4 of them don'T believe he is batman
Danny: "We know he is your Sugarbaby, Mom and dad talked about it."
Clone Talia:" So no fear, my OG liked a Himbo. And well Danny is a one too."
FR THO AND THEN THERE’S BABY DAMES IN THE CORNER SWEATING BECAUSE HE KNOWS. HE KNOWS. THE LoA TOLD HIM. He’s not saying SHIT though because this is hilarious. He’s silently laughing in the corner. And yessss Clone Danny and Clone Talia working out much better is exactly why I thought of it -- because one its funny and two the potential angst. the could have been.
It doesn't ever occur to Bruce to tell them he's batman but that conversation still comes up during mealtime one day while Danny's recovering (he has to be tied to his chair because he found the gym and nearly dislocated his shoulder trying to train. Dammit Danny your bones are made of glass right now from destabilizing, let your cells repair before doing anything!) because the four of them were talking about Batman and his clan of kids.
Danny, frowning: im not a himbo?
Nasra: reportedly when you first met Damian, your first response to his attacking you was to... grab the blade with your hands, multiple times. This resulted in you slicing a nerve in both hands and permanently weakening your fine motor control.
Danny: well--
Nasra: even now you're rubbing your palms, you only do that when your hands are bothering you.
Damian, snapping his head up: what!?
Danny: you noticed that?? also i learned. I didn't repeat myself when you attacked me when we met, did I?
Nasra: i. suppose not. you're still a himbo, however.
also Danny does his usual 'run on negative sleep' bullshit while in the manor except now he has not only damian but also Nasra tag-teaming his bullshit. Like no, Danny. you need sleep to recover your strength. your ghostly investigation can wait until you're not about to pass out and break your nose on your laptop. They have whole ass arguments in arabic - all three of them - as damian AND nasra drag danny to the closest soft horizontal surface. Danny returns the favor to the both of them when those two are also doing their 'negative sleep' stuff.
Dick at bby Dames: so do you....
Damian: know that you guys are Batman and his family? Yeah. Grandfather and Mother told me before I was living with Danny.
Tim: how come Danny and Nasra don't know then?
Damian: I didn't think it was important to tell Danny that his original was Batman. He does know of the League, however. He calls Grandfather my "super evil, ecofascist grampa and his cult of killers" and doesn't want to know more out of worry of needing to get involved.
Dick: I - really?
Damian: yes, he figured that since grandfather had yet to successfully wipe out my original, then that whatever Damian Wayne was doing was working. And that if he knew more, then he might have to get involved, and he has own problems to worry about than the League of Assassins.
#dpxdc#dp x dc#dp x dc crossover#dpxdc crossover#dp crossover#dpdc#dp dc#dp dc crossover#dpdc au#dpdc crossover#danny fenton is not the ghost king#danny fenton is a clone#clone^2#dick at nasra and damian: you dont like each other??#Damian: she attacked danny Nasra: he's an annoying little ingrate Danny: oh good they're getting along finally#nasra and damian solidarity is them sparring each other in the gym repeatedly. its how they start bonding. :) and also making sure danny#is taking care of himself. Danny makes sure Damian isn't staying awake too late from art or his own hobbies#and same with Nasra. he finds her beating the shit out of a training dummy and coaxes her to go get hot chocolate with him from the kitchen#he tells her about stars she tells him about the ocean - she's discovered a love for it. they're infodumping to each other#i love the asks send me more (affectionate)#anyone: hey [idea for your au]?#me foaming at the mouth: HEY U SHOULD TALK TO ME MORE. LETS TALK. PLS
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oh my fucking god i feel. SO stupid rn at How i didnt make the (super sane very normal just absolutely. Yes. Surely) connection earlier but uhh
so anyway im now like 89% certain that whatever the "traces" of the narwhal that remain on ajax and facilitate their (ever-growing) innate connection are like. an actually fundamental aspect of it (them?) more or less.
why? because if you consider its pov just for a moment. the narwhal was literally about to depart teyvat for good. it had nearly finished consuming the primordial sea and preparing to breach surface to finish the job by eating the french for the leftovers their human bodies were made from. its an interstellar voyager it does not linger on planets it devours. it goes glug glug and it leaves.
and like if it wasnt for traveler intervening its confirmed through narzissenkreuz and renes world formula that teyvat wouldve just been destroyed. no one could have stopped the narwhal not neuvillette not focalors not anyone.
so what was the one other thing it did right before going for that french brunch? calling for ajax. getting them reunited in the primordial sea. like all the possible implications aside bc theres many different ways to speculate on the exact reasons why and the nature of that link. the point remains.
it wasnt leaving teyvat without finding him.
like the narwhal is about to fucking Dip from this cringe planet and whatever part of it that ajax carries within himself his narwhal Absolutely wanted to be reunited with. what the fuck am i supposed to read from that. hoyo???????!??! answers?!?!?!
and its not only the calling from the narwhal side itself either bc this is ALL coinciding with the growth of a 'restless power' within ajax and his vision malfunctioning (the things celestia is literally confirmed to harvest energy thru to repair its damaged authority) and his connection with the narwhal reaching an actual conscious level (arguably subconscious n emotional too bc i find it Curious his mood is poor right as the narwhal is repeatedly described as positively malding to the point its boss fight mechanic is literally a rage meter). ajax' power is growing. his destiny is starting to shift and something is drawing him to fontaine... right as the narwhal is getting close to finished with the primordial sea. funny how it overlaps eh. how it aligns 🤨🤨 why are they orbiting each other like this (they should kiss)
(& not to even Mention how ajax just Happened to get that absolutely exponential and borderline unbelievable feat of power spike in extending his foul legacy endurance as massively as he did. while. within the primordial sea. with his narwhal. who had at that point all but incorporated the power of that sea into itself. i s2g if childe was getting passive home turf co-op bonus exp with a 4x multiplier automatically the whole 40+ days 💀💀)
#man the way its lovely reunion but tjen ajax fucking ATTACKS IT ON SIGHT you couldve gotten married!!!!11!1 fucking unbearable i am in agony#anyway contrary to popular belief we still have no fucking clue whether ajax' link to the narwhal was innate#skirk saying the traces remain on him after meeting it isnt saying tht much. the parts he shares w it couldve well been innate but dormant#instead. also just the fact that he woke it up already shady#then like. monoceros caeli being his from the beginning is completely plausible despite ppl acting like its been confirmed his const change#and like them being halves of the same entity on some lvl would make the narwhal being so weak without him n until ajax found it again#make very much. sense. anyway ajax toxicity jokes aside if the narwhal was just trying to eat him point blank without even a hello#i do get why hed react aggressively. but also bros been telling everyone n their mom hes fighting his narwhal the seconf he finds it again😔#so i feel somewhat confident in assuming he started that 40+ days brawl#anyway if ajax Isnt the celestial narwhal on some level or possibly becoming it as their link grows.#riddle me this atheists. why is his 3rd phase boss theme. the song about His individual murderous rage at us#bc he thought he was outplayed by us. His personal wrath#whys the song for that called the wrath of the celestial narwhal. of the star swallowing whale. Hmmmge. his individual rage.#why does tusk of monoceros caeli speak of him embracing the narwhals innate qualities as embracing mere parts of Himself#funny how tjat goes!! (the OST n boss drop is not 100% serious theory but it does drive me insane. bc why would they phrase it like that)#anyway either theyre 2 halves same original entity or theyre soulmates idgaf . they should fold teyvat in half and eat it for brunch#aaand im going to be consumed by this realization for the next month wish me luck#WHY DID IT NEED HIM THERE SO BADLY???? HUH??????#i mean relatable dont we all. but its sooooooooo inch resting. Curious indeed#rambles#genshin#childeposting#childe
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my ideal Kira and Julian dynamic is the dynamic between an older sister and a younger brother in a 90s teen movie. Julian is the annoying nerdy little brother and Kira is the teen older sister going "get out of my room you little dweeb" and shoving him into lockers
#star trek: ds9#kira nerys#julian bashir#I respect the choice to keep their relationship to being friendly coworkers#but also I want them to be the kind of besties where people who dont know them think they hate each other#someone watching Kira grab Julian in a headlock: captain it must be so difficult when your crew dont get along#Sisko not even bothered by it: no thats just how they show affection#every time one of Kira's love interests makes her mad Julian is there like 'want me to kill them for you'#'im a doctor you know I could poison them and nobody would even know! because I would do the autopsy :)'#because it'll make Kira laugh#meanwhile if Garak makes Julian mad Julian has to stop Kira from threatening Garak with a gun#Kira: I think it'd be funny#Julian: youre going to give him a heart attack!!#Kira: exactly it'd be funny#I think about this a normal amount.
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i feel people are sleeping on Dennis, like ughhh, just look at him
#f2#dennis hauger#f1 fanfic#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#f1#f2 x reader#f2 x you#f2 x y/n#f1 x you#red bull racing#hes so cute#i need him so badly#i cant stop thinking about him#i love his smile#also his hair????#i wanna play with it looks so soft#dont even get me started on his tattoos#i feel i have a heart attack everytime i see them#like imagine tracing your fingers over them omg#especially the one he has near his hip???#he has such a chokehold on me
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If it's okay with you, could you write a drabble about the hypothetical aftermath of Amane getting attacked by Kotoko?
Welp thank you pal for making me absolutely insane with this request 👍 I ran through a few hypotheticals and realized I had to shift some things around since there were so many absolutely tragic outcomes. I worked something out but damn if it didn’t make me emotional to think about how uniquely rough Amane has it. Even making sure she's in a good place at the end, this got pretty serious, so warnings for child abuse and cult references.
(So in canon, Kotoko goes in order and attacks Fuuta, but Kazui steps in. Then she attacks Mahiru while he’s distracted with his injuries. She’s about to attack Amane, but Mikoto gets in the way (my hc that he did it on purpose survives!). By the time they reach a draw, Kazui is back, and the two of them can prevent Kotoko from any further action against Amane. Sticking to this apparent system of three attacks and one rescue, I’m just shuffling around the injuries for this story. Fuuta’s attack went unnoticed, and he’s in the same state as canon Mahiru. Mikoto steps in before Kotoko can fight Mahiru, so Mappi’s the one who get out physically unscathed. While Mikoto checks on Mahiru, recovers himself, or discovers Fuuta, Kotoko is able to attack Amane next. Kazui comes to help, but not before she leaves Amane looking like canon Fuuta.)
Mahiru could practically feel her heart shatter into a million pieces when Amane finally cried in front of her. She hadn’t shed a single tear yesterday – it was the shock, Shidou said. Mahiru was skeptical. After all, she had been shocked, too, and cried plenty.
Amane woke as she came in with breakfast. She took a moment to survey herself, bandages peeking out from beneath her pajamas and an eyepatch securely over her right eye. As calmly as one might say “good morning,” she started to cry. Mahiru might have missed it, if Amane hadn’t wiped at her good eye with her sleeve.
“Oh, sweetheart…!” Mahiru rushed over to her. “It’s okay, I’m here.” She wanted nothing more than to wrap the girl in a secure embrace, but she remembered the mass of bandages that were around her chest. Shidou had mentioned broken ribs and bruises. It took everything in her not to cry along with Amane, at the thought.
“I can get you another ice pack, if you need. Or more medicine.” Her mind spun with ways to help with pain. Many of the first aid supplies had been used to keep Fuuta from the brink of death, but surely there were extras to spare for Amane.
The girl just shook her head.
She muttered, “I can’t… I…I’m going to be punished, I’m going to be punished…”
“No! You’re safe now.” Mahiru placed her hands gently on Amane’s arms. “Kotoko’s not coming back. We’re all watching over you. You’re safe. She’s not going to hurt you anymore.”
“That’s not…” Amane pulled away. Her voice stayed level, despite hiccups interrupting her. A hand reached up to her eyepatch. “It’s this. It’s all of this. It’s sinful. I took it off last night, but he must have…” She started unwrapping it. “They’re going to punish me...”
With a careful motion, Mahiru held it in place and took Amane’s hands into her own. She’d been picking up on the signs ever since they arrived here together, and a final wave of understanding washed over her.
“I can’t let you do that.”
Amane’s expression twisted, though words came out far more frantic than fiery. “Let me go.”
Mahiru didn’t. “I’m sorry. Amane, you need this treatment.”
“That is not your decision to make. That is not any human’s decision to make.”
Mahiru pressed her lips together. “I know. But I can’t watch as you… I can’t sit by again while someone…” She was careful not to apply any pressure, but she could no longer fight the urge to gather Amane up in her arms. “You don’t need to be afraid of those people, anymore.”
“I’m not afraid.” Amane hiccuped. “They love me, and I love them. I need to be good for them.”
“I love you, and I don’t want to see you in pain.”
“You just pity me because I’m young.”
“Why does your age matter? You are a lovely young woman – you are my friend – and I can’t bear to see you in pain.”
The two sat in silence for a moment. Mahiru doubted she would take that as an answer; Amane had refused to call any of the others her friend. At least she didn’t argue. In fact, it seemed she was leaning into the embrace a bit more. She sighed a shaky breath into Mahiru’s uniform.
“Listen, Amane. Can you do me a favor? I’m trying to be a good girl, too. To make up for something awful, I need to make sure you’re alright. Can you help me? Can we be good together?”
A long pause followed. Amane’s voice spoke up, ever so gently.
“I suppose I can consider it.” She added quickly, “for the sake of your redemption. Of course.”
“Of course.”
#milgram#amane momose#mahiru shiina#thank you so much! i dont want to be bubbly on such a serious drabble but i want to give an enthusiastic thanks because this one really got#the gears turning!!#i started making plans as soon as i saw the ask and it took so long finding something that wouldnt result in straight up tragedy :(#if i kept to the initial timeline and said kazui didnt step in until amanes attack then both fuuta and mahiru would be close to death#and given there seems to limited supplies i think one of them would have died if shidou needed to treat three critical patients#so i moved people around to make sure everyone survived#which brought me to the main problem of amane self sabotaging her medical care#even minor injuries could have resulted in death if she got her way and removed bandages/refused treatment#but the mental strain of keeping the treatment would be just as bad as the physical pain -- shed be paranoid 24/7 of#divine punishment and repeating the mistakes that led her here.... it would hurt more to be forced like that#so i needed someone to be able to get through to her gently#but the only one who shes been able to trust just got the shit beat out of him and is in no position to talk!!!!#everyone else would just make her more upset or not know how to convince her the right way :(#still - i think mahiru could do it the best! with her own trauma from allowing loved ones to die in front of her i think shed be motivated#so. yeah.#i know amane is supposed to be talking in the plural pronoun now but i couldnt get it to work - lets just say that kicks in soon after this#tw cults#tw child abuse#drabbles
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So I finally watched Sense8. I regret not watching it sooner for a couple reasons. But I'm so glad I finally watched it.
#i dont know why it got canceled#but it ended well for being canceled#AND ITS SO QUEER. ITS SOOOOO QUEER#two confirmed bi women. amanita had bi colored hair but being exclusively wlw the whole show she could be lesbian. a trans lesbian!!!!#all the men are queer. they are. i love how comfortable they are with each other. and RAJAN IS A GODDAMN KING. ID DIE FOR THAT MAN#sun and mun 🥺🥺🥺 omfgggg i love them. i kinda headcanon sun as demi- or gray-aroace and mun 😭 HES A FUCKING KING TOO#and diego 🥺 and felix 🥺 and Rileys dad 🥺 and Caphaes' mom 🥺 and amanita's parents 🥺 nomi's sister 🥺 and Kala's parents 🥺#SO MANY CHARACTERS WERE AMAZING!!!!!#also lowkey still in awe that there was a polycule through the whole show and then in the end theres a second one??? whaaaaat!!! amaaazing#ALSO ⚠️ BEFORE ANY YELLS AT ME FOR MAYBE MISSING A DETAIL ⚠️ Im human. maybe i got up for a drink and didnt pause.#bc thats a crime i commit often lol. so if im misinterpreting something dont chop off my head ok? i saw polycules you didnt have to#i saw an aroace reading. i dont totally know if i sit by that any more bc i think sun x mun is built well. like dont attack me over musings#ok. done for now#sense8#aunt posting
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i know too fucking much about qsmp badboyhalo.
#and also. not enough#that one big summary of his Deal was like . 1k words.#and it brushed over so much shit#like his trust issues and the vacation arc and his criminal background (on qsmp) and the way he was the first to take protecting the#eggs seriously and i dont even KNOW enough about his relationship with maxo and the french that is a big blindspot for me but bad and max#(and foolish?) og founders of the theory bros the first people who started questioning cucurucho and then the french his family the people#who keep proving to be on his side over and over and i love it when he hangs out with pierre and talks create#and when he chills with antoine and helps fix the big spinning ring#and his WEIRD warrior's bond with etoiles (bad always gets along with the protectors have you noticed that#forever was the second big egg protector and baghera took care of pomme from the start and cellbit threw himself to the feds to try to help#the island and etoiles took the weight of the code attacks from bad's shoulders to his own in entirety. he respects them all a lot and i am#chewing him to pieces)#and his relationship with baghera!!!! she can read him so so well and he fucking trusts her enough to be dapper's mom#he may have felt weird about it and was jealous and :c because tahts HIS dapper but#he didn't kill her about it#or really do anything to discourage it#and he noticed her tear streaks and her leg and got Worried about the federation 'fixing' her and#genuinely he was so so happy when he realized she was back he went !!! mode#look. LOOK at these fucking tags. look back at the post. i can Keep Talking.#my point remains i know too fucking much about qsmp badboyhalo#shit and i didn't even TALK about his weird bullshit with foolish#i need a giant corkboard
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slides into ur inbox as a tim-liker not to start a fight but to genuinely ask if i could gently change ur mind👀👀 bc tim's not that bad if you'd give him a chance (he is very cringe tho
It's not that I don't like him!! But sometimes it just gets exhausting to see "he suffered so much to keep the big bad bat alive" takes like Alfred wasn't right there
#like im sorry if i was a grieving parent and people literally attacked me for not being rational and in the best state of mind#while im literally grieving my murdered child and some kid came into my life because he wants to be robin and keep batman going#yeah i would be a little irritated#but it feels so mean spirited of me in a way? because i never want to shit on someones character#also i just dont like the 'child is responsible for parent' trope at all and it just feels like tim is so martyrized by the fandom#but i also dont like the 'tim forced his way into the family blah blah blah' like. no he didn't. the whole point of tim to me is that#he doesnt NEED to be with the batfamily but he WANTS to be there bc he loves them#its kinda how i feel abt steph. i actually really that she doesn't want to be seen as Bruce's daughter#because steph never NEEDED a father thats her whole point i think#so basically i dont dislike tim. i would just be fine without him. but like -- my favorite batboy is jason so maybe thats why?#anyway moral of the story if a character makes you happy they make you happy and its no one elses business
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horrible stupidass day. my aunt died. step-aunt technically; she was my uncle's second wife and she was amazing. they were putting up christmas decorations and she didnt feel well so she went to sit down and . that was it . feel weird bc its the middle of the week and im so wiped out from regular work crap that it isnt even hitting really i just found out and im . like sitting here thinking about dinner. but also she's the kind of person who wouldn't care; she'd think that was funny
#personal#dont reblog#i guess just bc its weird to me when ppl reblog specific personal events from peoples lives#but i also want to talk about her. we didnt see them that often bc they lived a couple states away so the last time was at grandmas funeral#but every time we got together she wanted to talk to me about blue october bc one time she found out we were both fans <3#she was the most patient encouraging woman; her support never felt pushy or like an expectation it was like she just quietly knew you#could do it - whatever 'it' was#compassionate. down to earth. in a family of big personalities terri was just a solid regular open-minded loving person#its fucked up and stupid that she has to be gone and there are so many assholes who dont die of a heart attack while holiday decorating
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yknow i've always considered myself a florelia purist but i have to admit musa/helia is getting to me
#the worms are attacking#ive always been fond of flora/winx ships and i dont mind helia/specialist ships#but flora/specialist and helia/winx ships were always a little... ueeeeeee to me#i just love flor.elia so much!!! them!! why date other characters when they!!!#but i admit it... the brainworms are here#i honestly think musa/helia could work!#like.. i really do think theyd bring out the best in each other#dont get me wrong i still prefer muri and flor.elia However#its cute...
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Biofluff Prompt 4: Scars/Healing
Guess who remembered he had Bioshock OCs and a reason to draw them.
Will and Evelyn bonding and healing with him teaching her to play piano.
#biofluff 2023#bioshock ocs#OC: Will Freeman#OC: Evelyn#smol makes art#basically the relevance to the prompts is both because Will here is at a point where he's able to have both sleeves rolled up and hair cut#back to how it was pre-Kashmir attacks; meaning he feels comfortable displaying his scars (at least at home) (it's A Whole Thing with him)#(losing his looks fucked him up) and Evelyn here was particularly scared of and traumatized by Cohen (assuming i keep her backstory) so her#developing a love for a music both allows her to connect with her new father and also rise above Cohen yknow? ya get me? turns out she's#quite talented in the music department shy as she is. i dont talk about them but they hold a place in my heart
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strange attractors. kind of like we could be?
#heroesedit#claire bennet#gretchen berg#primatech#nbc heroes#heroes nbc#claire x gretchen#heroes#anni edits#ok heroes... keep your rights#heroes is really not a show where i care about any of the canon 'romances' it throws at you#i'm much more inclined to go be a complete degenerate in the corner#but then s4 gave me claire discovering liking girls is a thing and it gave me weird girl gretchen and they were ADORABLE#so like. best best best. literally no context for best 'canon' ship in the show. at all#i love how claire bluescreens when gretch kisses her like she only just realised you could in fact kiss other girls#and then gretchen tries to give her an easy out like 'its ok if u dont like me'#and claire is so indignant like UH NO I DIDNT SAY THAT#shes still figuring out but uhhh she liiiikes her. when she smiles to herself when gretchen jokes about kiss attacking her lol. anyway#i love them tbh. claire's baby lesbian arc actually gave s4 ALL its rights back after s3#also genuinely uh. shout out to heroes for this in 2010 i guess?????#like it's for real a sweet and well handled and believable little teenage romance and its just. a thing! and it's cute!#sorry i love claire and gretchen lol#i meant no CONTEST for best canon ship lol. btw#i can be wholesome SOMETIMES believe it or not#heroes season 4
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i know nobody is online rn to read this but ;-; i gotta get it off my chest i love ken so much he means everything to me he's making me so happy and i've needed him so so so bad. he's brought me comfort when my ptsd has been so fucking unbearable and every time i'm having a crying fit over losing my tf f/os or every time i'm having a flashback i ALWAYS immediately IMMEDIATELY think about him rushing to my side, holding me and saying "hey hey it's okay, i'm here, i'm right here" and it's such a relief because i haven't been able to genuinely wholeheartedly believe any character would be willing to do that for me the entire time i've been struggling this year.
i've never gone so long without comfort from f/os, much less being triggered by the ones who used to comfort me the most. so to have barbie and ken right now is like the biggest wave of relief every single day when i wake up and the hyperfixation is still there. sometimes i will literally close my eyes and sigh in relief when i hear a song and my first thought is sebastian or ken or six or... whomever. i love being in love again. i NEED this. i love waking up and my first thought isn't my trauma most of the time now, it's ken. or it's six. or it's barbie. or it's harley. or it's officer k. or it's... yeah you get it. i needed these characters so fucking badly. every time i see a gifset and get excited over it, i feel a rush of gratitude bc self shipping has always been the glue holding me together. it doesn't feel as intense or strong as the SB musical or TF used to make me feel but i am not picky. not at all. i will take anything and i'm praying this lasts for at LEAST another few weeks please
i may not be at a sense of peace right now and i dont know when i ever will be, it could be years, but im so. so. so. so so so thankful to have these characters right now when i've needed someone so badly for so long. i hope ken knows how much i love him ;-; i hope barbie knows how much she has helped me, has saved me from one of my major triggers and has helped me to love and feel safe around the color pink again. i wish they could see me when i'm not so broken but i'm glad they're here even when i'm at my worst, i'm glad they still love me even when they deserve to see me in a much better light
#it feels so fucking terrible not celebrating my bday with my starlight. i used to buy myself cakes and put his figurine next to them#i mean i still have... a little bit over one week... i cant... let it pass by without him being involved somehow#so i might make a quick vent doodle and queue it for the actual day of my bday#i refuse to not draw myself with him at least once for my special day#its not like we 'broke up' or anything but fuck it feels so bad#he's a literal fucking ptsd trigger. how fucking insane is that#im still in shock. im still in shock over what happened to me like i cant fucking believe it#wearing his necklace makes me cry so i just leave it on my dresser#that shouldnt be normal!!!!#but im hoping that shipping with barbie/ken is going to help me feel like i can reclaim control over my ships#bc my abuser made me feel like... i had no control over my TF ships whatsoever for a solid year#so now that i'm finally free of that toxicity i'm still shakily trying to learn how to ship again#i'll have moments where i'll worry ken will try to hurt me on purpose bc im so used to my abuser telling me how abusive any f/o would be#but then i tell myself 'hey what the fuck. this is MY story. NOBODY would abuse me i dont care WHO they are'#but it's so hard to unlearn several months of abuse 😔#and even harder to look at a character who i invested so much time and energy and money into#my voice clips. my cameos. all of my steve blum autographs. my art for steve. all of it feels sad and numbing#not just stsc but everyone in any TF universe feels like... a threat and i get panic attacks when i see very specific characters sometimes#its awful. it hurts so bad. i love ken so much. but nothing compares to what i had with my TF comfort characters#but it's okay bc... ken is holding my hand and he might not understand ptsd at all but he can still squeeze me tight#and six HAS c-ptsd he GETS it. and he's there to hold me when my nightmares make me fall apart. he's my rock#vent#ptsd#sorry it's 5am i had a bad nightmare and now i refuse to sleep again#i fucking hate ptsd i fucking hate living like this i rly wish i knew how to cure myself#im exercising im eating and drinking often im sleeping as much as i can#theres only so much i can do#when does it get better?? when the fuck does it get better? im serious. not rhetorical. when does this finally heal#i dont even know if im healing or if im just distracted... but fuck ill take anything
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concept i become one of those blogs that make lists of head canons regarding each Weasley but instead of always either making Percy out to be the worst, having nothing to say about him or just not including him all together it just looks like this
how the Weasley siblings are when it comes to Shopping
Bill: (one sentence)
Charlie: (one sentence)
Percy: (8 paragraphs)
Fred: (two sentences)
George: (two sentences)
Ron: (one sentence)
Ginny: (one sentence)
Thank you so much for asking I had alot of fun thinking about that question!!!
#this is joke please don't take my sleep deprived brain seriously#this is also not hate or an attack on people who make these kinds of list i do find these sorts of things very very fun to read#i just think it would be very funny to come across something like this after seeing people who exclude him entirely#in reality i would feel really bad if i just didnt have anything to say about one of them#i love all the Weasleys they just dont give me brainrot like he does though#percy weasley
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There, I’ve read A Coney Island of the Mind
#mutuals get at me w thoughts on ferlinghetti#i dont read much poetry so idk how to read it fr#and i only know him as a influence to tom waits whom i big schlong long dick style love#but fr if you have an opinion hmu i HATE the beats and only make an allowance for the poets bc i have to listen to them for shorter than…#the hated prose beats especially but not limited to JK#whom i would attack on sight#books 2024
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