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#don’t know much about cave story yet but i’m excited to watch him play it lol
livcosmos · 2 years
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Stranger Things Season 4 Vol. I
Alright alright, I have to confess something…this post almost didn’t happen... shocking I know!!! Exactly, I who was so into the story, who binged watched the whole series two summers ago…and exactly this was my problem! It was all too long ago, I wasn’t in the story anymore, I didn’t remember much (I know it’s sad) and I feard that it wouldn’t be the same anymore now that everyone is so grown up, I feared that they stretched out the story just to make more money... oh and above all of that when I saw that the episodes were an hour and something long…it discouraged me even more. I was sure I wasn’t going to watch it but then after a very long day, a very busy day I was like you know what I want to chill and watch something I don’t feel like watching a movie and I’m not ready to catch up with Riverdale yet so let's give good old Stranger Things a go, I really used to love it so I won’t give up on it now. I invested too much time in it already and besides that, I thought that it wouldn't feel right to abandon the tradition of the reviews about it.
Oh and so it began that night, I watched the first episode and it didn’t swoap me off my feet, I was a little confused because again I didn’t remember much and it did indeed feel a little bit like they just continued the story because of the money BUT the next day I couldn't continue with the next episode because of work but all I did that day was to think about what will happen next! 
And just like that, I was hucked, my addiction to this show was finally back and oh how rewarding it was when I finally sat down to watch the second episode! But I had to do some catching up beforehand, so after a nice recap of the previous season I was ready to go! I said I will only watch one episode that second night but we all know that is not what happened!!! I wasn’t intimidated by the length of the episodes anymore I was just excited to get back and find out what happens next!!!
I am sooooooooo glad I caved in and watched it it was soooo good it really didn’t disappoint!!!!! And holy mother of God episode 4??!!!! What was that it was the best thing ever it was soooooo incredibly good!!! A true masterpiece! Oh and episode 7 my God also absolutely amazing!!! Those two episodes were magnificent, chef kiss!!! 
I so can’t wait to watch part two and to see how they wrap the whole story up (and this time for good, sadly!)!!! Thank God we don’t have to wait that long for it!!!
Anyways I think we are ready for some more detailed spoilery talking but before that I want to say one more thing, when I started episode 1 after the generic thing….the moment I saw that Jamie Campbell Bower was going to play….  MY GOD that was the first clue, the moment where I should have released that this was going to be very very gooood!!!! OHHHH and how I waited and waited for him to appear but it was so worth it!!! He will always and forever be Jace, I love him but oh how he fooled me... I mean I kind of saw the plot twist coming but then on the other hand I didn’t! He was acting a little suspicious but my weakness for him blinded me and I believed him when he was nice to El. 
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Here we go we are jumping into the details so I have to but the up the SPOILER WARNING!
Ok so I just have to start with my favourite characters because I just have to! Nancy is and always will be my absolute favourite!!! She is so smart and I love her, she is just a big inspiration and I don’t remember if I said it before in the previous reviews but I’m sure I did (I really should have read my reviews before writing or even watching the new season but anyway) I’m not a big fan of Jonathan and I never ever shipped him with Nancy so their current situation was more than welcome!  And I also am 100000% sure that I already said that I will forever ship Nancy with Steve no matter what! So the fact that they are rebounding, that there is a slight chance that they will make up and be together is even better and more welcome than Nancy’s kind of breakup with Jonathan!!!
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OHHHH and speaking of Steve…my good old Steve!!! I remembered that I used to have a huge crush on him but it kind of faded away over time (in the time that I didn't watch the show) and I thought it was over but two episodes in and I was head over heels again!!! I love him soooo much he is so funny and please God make him end up with Nancy!!! AHHHH Steve… how he was dragged into the upside-down and how he fought does bat things ahhhh wow wow wow I love him so much!!!
Oh and I love that Robin is now friends with Nancy and I loved how they are a team, that they are friends!!! Ah, I just love it!! But of course, my favourite friendship is and will forever be Steve and Dustin!!! It’s absolutely hilarious, they made me laugh out loud so many times!!! It was just the best!!!
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But you know who I didn't like? Lucas! I don’t know how that happened because I used to like him but he just…how he wanted to be the cool guy and everything I mean after episode 4 he was himself again and I liked him back but still. And I have noticed that he got really little screen time which is kind of sad! Oh and that friend of his I don't remember his name, the wired guy, Chrissi's boyfriend, the big mouth basketballer, he annoyed me soooo much!!! I get his point but he exaggerates and he is very annoying !!!
Oh and because I can't stop with the surprises, I have another one, I  loved Max!!! She is really growing on me I mean I remember not liking her at all, like at all in season 2, I accepted her in season 3, I kind of started to like her then but now?! WOW that running scene, that song, the letters!!! By the way, I want to know what she wrote for everyone! I really like her now! Funny how the tables have turned!
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Another thing I didn't like was that they brought back Dr Brenner, I mean I get it they needed him to get the plot going but I remember him dying and I would like to know how he survived!
El, well I don’t know what to say about her… I knew from the beginning that she wasn’t responsible for all those killings and I know she is the main character and I should care more about her but I’m more invested in the Nancy, Steve, Dustin and Robin group or even Joyce, Murray and Hopper, I love Joyce and she and Murray are also really funny, than in I am in her!
Also, what is wrong with Will??? He is acting wired I feel like he is hiding something, I might be totally off with this theory but I had the thought that he might have feelings for Mike? I don’t know it is just a guess! Oh oh but I loved how they went to get help from Dustin’s girlfriend! That was so cool!
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Oh I just checked my notes and I almost forgot another thing that has slightly bothered me, the fact that Anne from "Anne with an e" made an appearance! I like her but for me, she will always be Anne and I can’t see her in another role I'm sorry for me she doesn't fit in the Stranger Things world, I am glad she didn't appear much!
Surprisingly I am ok with how they ended it for now but as I said, I can’t wait for part two but I can live till the 1st of July, which is good The only thing I can do is to hope that everything I want to happen will happen, Steve and Nancy ending up together being nr.1 on that list!
I am very glad I watched it, I am very happy I’m back into the story and that we are getting so many answers to all those questions that were raised way back in season one (the first one being how El actually opened the first portal into the upside-down)! I can’t wait to talk to you all about part two!!! Thank you so much for discussing this and I hope to see you next time! Bye Bye!!!
P.S I defiantly should read my other reviews about the show, to really get back on track with my thoughts and opinions but I do remember that they differently were waaayyy longer than this one! Wow, it’s so funny how invested I am in things like this sometimes hahaha!!! 
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rakumel · 9 months
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Raku Plays Her Faves, Ys VIII, Chapter 2: Well...That Escalated Quickly
So...remember way back in the Prologue where I said I liked the whole fancy dinner and drinks on the Lombardia part? Because it felt kind of like the opening to an Agatha Christie novel? That’s still true.
But you know what feels even more like an Agatha Christie novel?
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An actual murderer on the loose. 
(Here there be some spoilers for the climax of Chapter 2. Be warned! On one hand, I kinda hate discussing spoilers because I don’t want to discourage people from finding stuff out on their own, but on the other hand, it’s easily one of my favorite parts of the game because I’m a sucker for mysteries. Also, I’d like to point out that this doesn’t spoil the entire game - just the end of Chapter 2.)
Told you Chapter 2 got way more exciting. So how the blue fuck did we get to this point?
First, let’s backtrack some. In the Prologue we had the shipwreck on the cursed island, in Chapter 1 we set up some basics of the game and story. Chapter 2 is where, after getting us nice and comfy, the story throws a couple of monkey wrenches into the works to complicate things. One you’ve already seen: Adol starts having weirdly specific dreams about a young lady named Dana, who appears to be from some completely different civilization set during a different era. We won’t get a full explanation for that for quite some time, and it’s not what we’re discussing today anyway.
Nope, today we focus on the bigger and more immediate monkey wrench: the climax of Chapter 2. Adol, Laxia, and Sahad have been spending much of this chapter exploring the island, battling monsters, and finding other survivors from the Lombardia shipwreck. We already know they’ve found Captain Barbaros, Dogi, and Alison the tailor. Here’s a quick rundown of all the other castaways they’ve found so far, more or less in the order they found them:
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Halfway through the Towering Coral Forest, they found these two. Sitting on the ground is Sir Carlan, a cartoonishly snotty nobleman who (supposedly) sprained his ankle. He was being tended to by the man in the vest, a doctor named Kiergaard.
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Kiergaard told them where to find another castaway, a lady named Kathleen who’s an expert blacksmith. She becomes the person who upgrades your weapons, and overall just an awesome character.
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On a different beach they encounter Hummel, the somewhat suspicious “Man in Black” on the Lombardia, who doesn’t talk to them at first. But after a little persistence he introduces himself as a transporter, which we learn later on is sort of a niche delivery service. One where they don’t ask any pesky questions about what’s in the package. Questions like: Are there drugs in here? Is this a sack of laundry or a dead body? or, Why is this box ticking?
After their first meeting, he shows up later on and joins Adol’s party for a while. It is fucking hilarious to watch Hummel harvest things like flowers or bird eggs, because he’s a sniper and doesn’t have a close-range basic attack outside of battle. He literally shoots everything with his rifle.
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I also like the little wing detail on his hat, which reminds me of the old FTD delivery company logo, which itself is a reference to Hermes, who among other things was the Greek messenger god.
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Speaking of god, in a cave behind a waterfall, they found a nun, Sister Nia.
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On yet another shore they found a young merchant, Dina. She takes over the trading post when she gets back to Castaway Village. There’s no currency in the game - naturally, since they’re all shipwrecked on a deserted island. So technically you can’t buy or sell anything. But the game works around that nicely by allowing you to trade up many cheap items for rarer ones, or break up rare items into common ones, as you need them.
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Next they found an 11-year-old boy named Reja, and after a little more searching, the pikkard that saved his life by allowing him to cling to its body so the boy didn’t drown in the ocean. (Pikkards are a common farm animal in the Ys games.) With Dogi’s help, Reja sets up a little farm where you can plant seeds and harvest the fruit and vegetables that grow at regular intervals.
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In a place hilariously called Schlamm Jungle, they find this guy, a Romun military policeman named Euron. He’ll set up a little craft shop in the village where he can take apart armor and accessories you don’t need or want, and get back some of your items.
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Finally, on Odd Rock Coast, they found an overly skittish guy named Licht. Later he mentions he’s a medical resident. 
Adol and company are literally about to escort Licht to the village when Little Paro finds them and squawks about an emergency. When they get back to Castaway Village, Dogi meets them and reports that Captain Barbaros was attacked and gravely wounded by an unknown assailant. Doctor Kiergaard had tended to his wounds, but the captain is still in pretty rough shape.
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When questioned, all the captain remembers before nearly being gutted was a man calling out to him. Unfortunately, he didn’t get a good look at his attacker. While the captain was being treated, the note from “Nemo” was found on a nearby table.
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At this point, Euron joins in, and we find out why he was on the Lombardia. Turns out he was tracking a serial killer known only as “The Nameless Ripper.” Euron and his partner were originally supposed to meet on board the Lombardia, where a suspect matching Nameless’ profile had also booked passage, and catch the guy. Only, the shipwreck kind of fucked everything up. 
So Nameless is now running loose on the island, and this attack on the captain fits his M.O. - the random attack with a sharp weapon, a note signed “Nemo” (Euron explains that “Nemo” means “Nameless”, hence the “Nameless Ripper” moniker.) Which means he’s found the village, or - even worse - possibly IS one of the villagers. Dogi worries that it’ll only be a matter of time before the castaways start panicking and distrusting one another.
He doesn’t have to wait long.
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They hear a scream outside, and when they rush out to see what happened, they find Kiergaard tending to Sir Carlan’s leg once again - only this time, it genuinely is injured. Sir Carlan immediately starts throwing a fit, accusing random castaways, and insisting that they get him off the island right this fucking minute. He thinks that they can use the small fishing boat they made to row out and hail a passing ship. When it’s pointed out to him that virtually no ships go near the Isle of Seiren because of its reputation, and the tiny little boat won’t last long out in the waves of the deep ocean, it just pisses him off.
At that point, there’s a random beast attack on the village, and clearing them out diverts everyone’s attention for the rest of the day. 
Overnight, we get a bit of character info dump for Laxia. It’s Adol’s shift on the night watch over the village. Laxia can’t sleep, so she cooks him a little meal, climbs up to the watchtower where he’s sitting, and basically apologizes for her earlier behavior towards him. It’s too long to put here, but short version, she was dealing with a lot of stressful shit even before she set foot on a doomed passenger ship.
Cut to the next morning....
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Sir Carlan fucks off and steals the boat anyway. However, he doesn’t really know the first thing about how to steer it, so he gets stuck in a current. Adol and company run down the beach to try to catch him, and hopefully convince him to turn back.
He either can’t hear them at all, or refuses to, because he doesn’t try to turn around. There’s also a very big flaw in Sir Carlan’s plan that I failed to mention.
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The tentacled thing that sunk the Lombardia and countless ships before that? Yeeeeaah....it’s still out there.
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And confronting it in a tiny boat goes about as well as you’d expect.
So, uh....yeah. That happened.
And Chapter 2 isn’t even over yet. In the next part, the investigation into the Nameless Ripper case will begin in earnest. Think you know who it is? Keep it to yourself for now. But eventually, we’ll see if you’re right. :)
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wavepriism · 2 years
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my brother’s birthday was yesterday, so i drew him some caved story fanart!!
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This Game of Yours
Father of Mine – Part 1 and Part 2
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Jason was beautiful.
And somehow that scar that went from the right corner of his mouth up to his temple only made him that much more beautiful to Y/N.
Those blue eyes were the same color of water on a stormy day in the Irish sea. And somehow Y/N knew they held the same tempestuousness.
The white streak weaved with his jet black hair so naturally that Y/N would’ve believed he was born with it.
His shoulders were so broad, making his 6’3 height feel even more imposing. He had a presence. People noticed every time he walked into a room. It made Y/N wonder how he was ever able to sneak up on people as Red Hood.
He was wearing a black hoodie underneath his black moto jacket.
Y/N knew Jason didn’t give a shit about fashion. Yet he was well-dressed without any effort – more so than most of the models Y/N had shot throughout her career.
Not being able to control herself any longer, Y/N raised her camera and took a photo.
Jason stopped surveying their surroundings and his gaze snapped to her.
“What do you think you’re doing?” 
But his growl didn’t scare her in the slightest.
“Anyone who’s by me when I have a camera is at risk of getting their picture taken. No one is safe. Not even you,” she answered his question unapologetically.
Y/N was working on a personal passion project for her next show. Her collection would be about the poverty and crime of Gotham. Half of the photos would show the heaviest crime areas of the city. And the other half would expose the lifestyles of the wealthiest people in Gotham.
Why did so many suffer from the same system that helped the rich get even richer?
When Bruce found out Y/N was going to Crime Alley and the Bowery by herself, he was visibly upset.
But he realized that Y/N would do as she pleased, so his plan b was to give her protective detail.
However, Y/N didn’t know that Jason had volunteered, almost immediately.
Instead, all she heard was Jason grimly telling her, “You’re lucky you haven’t been fucking murdered yet.”
She had only responded with a roll of her eyes.
“I’m not your escort so you can take my picture. I’m here so you don’t get raped or murdered.”
“Has anyone ever told you that you have a way with words?”
His only response was a glare.
Jason loved playing this game. The game of pretending to be irritated with her when actually he was absolutely infatuated with Y/F/N Y/L/N.
“The easiest way to stop getting your picture taken is to always be the one holding the camera,” Y/N added with a smirk and wink.
Jason didn’t answer, only thinking what a shame it was that no one got to photograph her.
Suddenly, the sunlight hit the top of his head perfectly, creating a halo around that thick and messy hair of his.
Y/N snapped another photo.
“Will you stop?” He warned.
It only succeeded in making her laugh.
And that just excited his heart even more.
“Jason, you were born to get your photo taken.” 
There was no joke underneath her words, only sincerity.
“Whatever,” he mumbled.
Jason had a hard time believing that. His skin was riddled with scars. And he was convinced that she’d be singing a different song if she saw his chest, with its thick autopsy scar amongst the so many others. The absolute last word he’d use to describe himself was beautiful. Strong and imposing? Yes. But never beautiful – or any other positive adjective, for that matter.
“I’m not kidding. If you ever want to stop the whole vigilante thing, you can easily become a model.”
Y/N had noticed it as soon as Jason took of his helmet that night. His domino mask had done nothing to prevent her from noting the obvious.
It didn’t take long for Y/N to realize Jason wasn’t like his “brothers.”
“Brothers.” What a strange word.
Should she consider all of them as hers?
Only Damian was actually related to her – and technically he was only her half-brother.
Y/N had watched Jason get on his motorcycle and leave the cave that night she’d almost died.
She’d agreed to stay for dinner and get to know everyone. And a part of her brain was excited to get a better read on the masked man that sat by her bedside as she’d recovered.
“He’s not staying?” Y/N had asked Bruce as he guided her to the stairs that led back up to the manor.
He only shook his head, but she noticed the disappointed expression.
Soon she found out that Jason was the black sheep of this strange family that had taken her in.
Dick was the one who told her about Jason’s dark past. All of it seemed unbelievable: murdered by Joker and brought back to life from a mysterious pit. Only to return to the family who appeared to have replaced him and never sought vengeance on Jason’s behalf. 
But it was true; Y/N had seen no lie in Dick’s eyes when he filled her in.
Suddenly there was yelling coming from around the corner.
Without hesitation, Jason shoved Y/N behind him.
He reached for one of his guns and then realized that he didn’t have any.
Y/N was rather vocal about hating them, claiming they made her extremely uncomfortable.
Her expression alone as she said it was enough for Jason to swallow his stubbornness and leave the things at home.
Bruce was rather taken aback by the gesture. Nothing he’d ever said was enough to get Jason to do that.
A gang of young men came marching around the corner like they owned the place…because they did. This was their territory.
Jason immediately recognized them as some of the Russian mob.
Despite pulling Y/N behind him, they still caught sight of her and looked her up and down without an ounce of shame.
“Hey, beautiful. How you doing?”
“Продолжай идти, придурки,” Jason growled at them.
He was outnumbered. But there must’ve been something about his body language that made the gang realize they shouldn’t pick a fight with him. Maybe it was the muscles or his height or that he looked like he wouldn’t even blink before murdering them.
So they just…walked away. Some of them mumbled threats or insults at him. But they realized they shouldn’t even so much as look at Y/N.
A split second before they were gone, Y/N took a picture of Jason.
“Really?” He asked.
She shrugged. “You look like a different person when you’re protective.”
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Y/N was beautiful.
Jason watched as she passionately explained her work to a potential buyer.
He recognized the man as a local politician – luckily, one of the few that hadn’t been corrupted from this shitty city.
Y/N had the intimidating energy of her father, but the kind eyes of her mother. At least, that was what Bruce had told everyone, and they all took his word for it.
She wore a stylish white jumpsuit that made her look like a 1980s villain and black stiletto heels. 
Jason watched as men cowered in her presence, hating the fact that she proudly stood taller than them. She was just one less woman they could intimidate or manipulate – and they couldn’t stand it.
But Jason loved watching the emasculation in real time.
The bastards didn’t deserve her anyway.
Dick was one of the very few men Jason knew who didn’t blink at a woman towering over him. In fact, his older brother had a track record of preferring it.
“Surprised to see you here,” Bruce said beside him, catching Jason watching Y/N.
“Well, I was her personal bodyguard through all this. Figured I should see if it was worth me wasting my time or not.” Then he tossed back his champagne and slammed it on the tray of a waiter passing by. “Plus, free alcohol.”
Bruce just quirked an eyebrow, silently telling Jason that he knew he was lying.
“Are you buying something?” Jason asked, trying to change the subject.
“I have been strictly forbidden,” Bruce sighed.
Jason chuckled.
He knew if Bruce had his way, he’d buy every single on of Y/N’s pieces.
“I have to know,” Bruce began. “What exactly is holding you back?”
Jason finally ripped his gaze away from Y/N to give Bruce a questioning look.
“What are you talking about?”
“Y/N. You care about her.”
“All of us do,” Jason brushed off. “Even the demon spawn.”
Bruce knew there wasn’t a chance Jason would admit his feelings – especially to him.
“Not that I think you care…but you have my approval.”
Little did Bruce know, Jason did care.
Jason had convinced himself that their rocky relationship and past fights meant that Bruce would die before he let Jason be anywhere near his daughter.
And Jason could hardly blame him.
He didn’t deserve to be loved. He lost that right after he died and came back a monster. And that was the story Jason told himself over and over again.
So he would love Y/N from afar. And hope she would pick someone who was worthy of her love.
“She’s basically my sister,” Jason groaned in fake disgust.
It was quite the performance.
Bruce narrowed his eyes. “We both know that isn’t what’s stopping you. And you’ve made it clear you don’t consider us your family.”
“Whatever, Bruce.”
Jason walked away, having enough of the subject.
“What was that about?” Clark asked as he joined Bruce’s side.
“Jason refusing to let himself be happy,” Bruce sighed.
Clark already knew what Bruce was talking about. He’d seen Y/N and Jason dancing around each other for months now. He’d never really seen Y/N take an interest in anyone before, so it was all new for Clark.
“Don’t worry. Y/N won’t let him get away with it for much longer,” Clark said through a smirk. “She gets what she wants.”
And Bruce believed him.
“It doesn’t bother you – the two of them together?” Clark asked with genuine curiosity.
“Jason reminds me every day that I’m not his father. And I’m hardly Y/N’s.” A soft smile formed on Bruce’s lips. “He’ll look after her. And she…I think she’d be good for him. I just want them to be happy. Both of them.”
——
Jason headed home rather early.
He’d never actually went to say congratulations or even hello to Y/N.
Every time he was about to go over, someone else stole her attention. He didn’t want to get in the way of her talking to potential buyers or even just friends.
Jason was just about to make himself something to eat when there was a knock at his door.
He froze.
Very few people knew where his apartment was.
Jason grabbed a gun and tiptoed to his front door.
With a peak through the peephole, he let out a irritated sigh.
Jason whipped the door open, “You’re lucky I didn’t shoot your head off.”
“Maybe don’t own guns and you wouldn’t have to worry about shit like that,” Y/N snapped back.
“What are you doing here?”
“You come to my gallery opening and don’t even say hi?” Y/N accused as she stepped around him and into the apartment, not waiting for an invitation.
Jason eyed the paper bag that was in one of her hands.
“By all means, come on in,” he called sarcastically as he slammed the door behind her.
Y/N started searching through his cabinets. “Where are your glasses?”
“The one to your right. What are you doing here?”
Y/N had the brightest and almost mischievous smile as she pulled a bottle of champagne from the paper bag.
“I brought this as my thanks for you making sure I don’t – and I quote – ‘get raped and murdered.’”
Jason glared at her.
Here was the game again.
Y/N being charming and hilariously provoking..and Jason pretending like he hadn’t fallen for her.
She poured them both a glass. They weren’t flutes or coupes, but she couldn’t care less.
“We’re chugging these, by the way,” Y/N informed Jason as she handed him a glass.
He sighed, but obediently clinked his glass with hers and tossed it back.
Barely giving them a second, Y/N immediately refilled them.
“So, why didn’t you come over and say hi?” She repeated.
“Didn’t want to bother you,” Jason mumbled with a shrug.
She narrowed her eyes at his answer. “You’ve never bothered me before, Jason.”
Now he felt guilty.
Jason bowed his head. “I should’ve come and talked to you,” he agreed. “Your work…it looked – it’s amazing, Y/N. Congratulations.”
Apparently Y/N hadn’t expected such a sincere compliment from him, and she was stunned to silence.
“Thank you,” she managed to whisper once she’d recovered.
She cleared her throat, trying to maintain her edge. “And really…thank you for being my own little security detail.”
If Jason was healthy about expressing is thoughts and feelings, he would’ve told her that it was the highlight of his weeks. That he looked forward to her calls or texts, telling him that she was going to photograph another shady area. “Be there or don’t. I’m going no matter what,” she’d text him with her usual snark.
But Jason didn’t express his thoughts and feelings.
He kept them bottled up – with the same energy he used to keep Y/N at a distance.
So instead, Jason said, “If it wasn’t me, one of the others would’ve done it.”
Y/N winced slightly at that.
‘You’re such a fucking asshole,’ Jason told himself.
“You know…we can see each other even you’re not my bodyguard.”
Jason was impressed by her boldness. But she didn’t know what she was doing. She didn’t understand that he wasn’t good. He couldn’t play the loving boyfriend role. She belonged with someone like Dick or Clark – or literally anyone but him. And Jason was willing to be an asshole to make sure she understood that.
Y/N took a step closer to him, invading his personal space.
Without breaking eye contact, she threw back her second glass of champagne and then placed it on the nearest counter space.
She stepped even closer.
This was simultaneously Jason’s worst nightmare and most desired dream.
Her eyes moved from his eyes to his lips.
But before she could make her final push, Jason took a step back and cleared his throat.
He looked down at the ground as he said, “You should go.”
When he looked up, he expected to find Y/N heartbroken or embarrassed.
But she was neither.
No. She looked irritated.
Not because she wasn’t getting what she wanted, but because she was sick of his games.
Y/N sighed and stepped back. “Fine.”
Jason rubbed his face in frustration as she grabbed her purse and started for the door she had walked through only minutes ago.
She opened it and paused.
“You know what? No. Fuck that,” Y/N snapped before slamming the door closed.
She whipped around and strutted back to him with purpose.
Jason was suspended with both fervor and awe.
Y/N grabbed his face and pulled him down to her lips.
All self control went out the window. Jason couldn’t continue his game. It was all over for him.
He kissed her back almost immediately. How could he not?
Y/N bit his lip slightly, making him hiss in surprise. It was his punishment for making her wait all this time.
Eventually they needed a moment to breathe.
But Y/N didn’t let go of his face when their lips finally parted.
“Choose your next words very carefully,” she breathed.
He swallowed nervously. “You’re kind of fucking terrifying. You know that?”
Her smile was pure evil.
Apparently this was the right response.
“Are you done being an idiot?” She asked.
He nodded quickly.
Her hands moved down and then lingered on his neck, tracing the bottom lines of his jaw.
She smiled again and then looked him up and down.
“What?” He questioned.
“Nothing,” she laughed. “I’m just…I’m not used to being shorter than men.”
“Is that the only reason you like me? Huh? My height?” Jason goaded.
“Of course not,” Y/N scoffed. “It was the whole ‘I look like I could murder everyone and I can, but deep down I’m a big softie’ that did it for me.”
Jason’s grip tightened on her waist. “Oh, yeah? You’re one to talk…”
“Me?!” She yelped. “I couldn’t kill anyone, even if my life depended on it.”
“Maybe. But your terrifying in basically every other way.”
Y/N laughed at that.
Jason couldn’t stop himself from smiling at the sound
“So…still want me to leave?” She asked.
And this time, she would if that’s really what he wanted.
“Fuck no,” Jason answered, almost threateningly.
Then, for good measure, he picked her up by the back of her thighs and carried her to the couch, before he started to kiss her once again.
Y/N knew things weren’t always going to be this simple.
Jason had his demons. 
And honestly, so did she. They were nothing like his. And maybe they were silly in comparison. But she wouldn’t be the perfect partner. Just like he wouldn’t be. 
They’d drive each other crazy. But it would be the good kind of crazy.
------------------------------
+ Childhood
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Pix, where's your couch?
Some fluff to counter all the angst I've read in the last 24hrs. (Silly move as made myself cry - too many talented writers out there breaking my heart). Or at least if not fluff no angst.
Probably more a teen and up fic than general but still fairly clean (I think... I rubbish at knowing what ratings etc really).
Masterlist
...............................................
Jason stared at the space in the middle of the room.
“Pix, where’s your couch?”
“Hmmm, Jay?”
“I know you said that I could crash at your place again, so, umm, where’s the couch?”
“Oh, It had one to many blood stains so I got rid of it. You always said it was like sleeping on rocks anyway, so I’ve ordered a new one. It’s arriving next week.”
Marinette beamed up at Jason, bouncing on her toes with excitement while she grabbed his hand.
“It’s so pretty, Jay. I’m so happy that I finally could get rid of the old one and get a new beautiful comfy amazing sofa. You should see the pattern on the material. Oh oh and the detail on the frame. Hang on! I'll see if I can find a picture… you have to see it."
Marinette suddenly dropped his hand in favour of dashing about her apartment hunting for the picture as Jason's eyes darted between the chaotic woman and the space where the couch should be. Yes he'd asked to crash at her place in the past and always moaned that the couch was the worst thing to sleep on ever, but it was better than having to be near his family when he wanted to hide. Aaand he also might have come round earlier in the week before heading back to the cave to get some wounds seen to for an easier journey… but still had he really left the couch in such a state she decided to finally listen to his advice and get a new one?
"Pix, that's great and all but umm, where am I going to sleep?"
"In my bed, silly. It's the only other place."
Jason groaned and dragged his hand down his face. He knew what was going to happen next.
"Pix, darling, sweetheart, where are you going to sleep? You can't work all night which I know you love doing. You need to rest too. Look, I'll just call Roy up again and see if I can crash at one of his safe houses. Bruce is less likely to know about those."
"Jay, I'll just sleep next to you. The bed's big enough for the both of us. It'll be fine so you don't need to call Roy."
"What?!"
"It'll be fine. We can share the bed for the night. Now go dump your stuff in my room and I'll make us some dinner."
Jason grimaced as he knew there was no escaping. Roy, the arsehole, would tease him mercilessly if he didn't stay, and if he went he'd hurt Marinette's feelings as she'd offered up her home, her bed, for him to hide.
…………
"Jay, you're as stiff as a dead body. This is meant to be relaxing. If you don't want to watch this film we can sit on my dining room chairs and watch the TV out there. Or I can find some cards so we can play games at the table?"
"Nope, this is fine, Pix."
"Really? Then relax. You don't need to be so tense."
Jason took a deep breath and slowly let it out and forced himself to loosen his muscles and sink into the comfort of Marinette's bed. Apparently, due to having no seating in her living room, she'd taken to watching stuff on her laptop in bed if she wasn't working. Now the pair were both sitting on her bed watching some film she'd selected. Suddenly she trilled next to him.
"Ooo I know what will help. I bought some decent wine back from France with me after visiting my parents. I'll go get it. It's much nicer than the stuff I've found here. You'll love it Jay. It's the perfect thing to help us destress from the week."
Before Jason could respond she'd danced out the room, giggling to herself about her 'great' idea.
Jason swore to himself. He could do this. It wasn't a big deal. He could control himself. He could sit 'very' close and sleep next to his crush. It was only a crush. Not love. In her bed. It won't be that hard. He just needed to keep his cool. He ran a hand through his hair, trying to figure out a strategy to survive the night.
Before he had mentally formalised his survival plan Marinette burst back into the room, glasses and wine in hand, only to trip on her bedroom rug and crash face first into his lap. Miraculously saving the wine and glasses. Jason carefully removed them from her grasp as she turned to peer up at him wide eyed, face dangerously close to where it currently shouldn't be for his sanity.
"Oops. I keep doing that. I really should move that rug. Sorry Jay."
Jason let out an inaudible whine and closed his eyes slowly counting to 10. This was going to be as hard as he originally thought it was going to be.
"S'okay, Pix. Just get up so we can have the wine and watch the film."
Awkwardly smiling at Jason, Marinette detangled her legs and climbed over him to get settled next to him again. Carefully she took the wine bottle off him to open and poured some into the glasses he held out for her. After putting the bottle on her bedside table, she turned her attention back to Jason and the film.
"Now we can relax properly. Guessing you're not ready to vent about Bruce yet."
"Nah, not really. You're making an effort to cheer me up and distract me so don't want to bring the evening down. And don't look at me like that! This is perfect Pix, a much better way to relax. If I wanted to vent I'd go punch and shoot scum. Do *you* want to vent about your latest commission though?"
She looked guiltily at him, "Do you mind?"
Jason looked softly at her and smiled, "Go ahead Pix."
Suddenly it was like a dam had opened and she was telling him about the ridiculous demands expected of her. The issues with the material. How her sewing machine was not playing ball and likely needed a service or replacement part soon.
Jason gazed fondly at his friend (crush) nattering animatedly away. With wine in hand he relished the soft warmth of the room. She was right about the wine helping to relax, the film long forgotten as they chatted away enjoying the safe space she had created under the glow of the fairy lights.
It was only when the film had stopped that they were drawn out of their discussions.
"Oh! We kinda missed that film huh?"
"Yup, Pix we did. And we've finished that bottle as well."
"I'll set another film up, did you want to change and do your ablutions while I set it up."
"Change?" Jason squawked out.
Marinette turned to glare at him. "Yeah, change. You're not sleeping in my bed in jeans Jay. So go change. I'll sort myself in a minute too."
Jason reluctantly left to go to the bathroom and quickly changed. After cleaning his teeth he splashed cold water in his face. He had managed so far. He'd resisted brushing her hair out her face. He'd resisted pulling her close as she leant on his shoulder as she laughed. He resisted kissing her when she pouted when telling her story.
He could do this.
As he returned Marinette slipped out telling him to sort the bed out for them to lie down for the next film. The stars had long since come out and Jason begrudgingly agreed that there was a high chance that they 'could' fall asleep in the next one. (Okay, it was a low chance given his nightly antics and her insomnia but he'd play along with her belief.)
Jason had settled, still sitting in the bed but under covers this time as Marinette re-emerged.
She was trying to kill him.
He had played nice wearing a vest and joggers. She, Marinette, had dressed to kill in just an oversized T-Shirt that hung off her shoulder and brushed the tops of her thighs.
Jason squeezed his hands into fists as she carefully this time manoeuvred around the room, showing off her long legs. Apparently she had a late growth spurt and finally took more after her father than her mother now. Breaking his gaze from her legs as she moved round the other side of the bed he sent her a tight smile as she climbed in next to him.
"You all set for the next film?"
"mm hmm"
As she lent forward to press play, Jason darted his eyes to the ceiling. Marinette turned around to see Jason staring up and laughed.
"Jay, that's sweet and all but I do have sleep shorts on. You'd not see my underwear. Plus you're my friend. I trust you."
"You couldn't have warned me!"
"Nah, seeing your reaction was funny. Now shhh film time."
Sitting back, Marinette grabbed a blanket and wrapped it around her shoulders and smoothed the duvet down before resting her head against Jason's shoulder snuggling into his arm. She smiled and sighed in contentment as she lost herself in the film.
Jason's blue screened for a moment as his friend cuddled into his arm. He knew she often did this on the couch but still having her do this in bed, in her pajamas, was another matter. He should have been better prepared. He had thought his mission earlier was a challenge. It had now reached monumental difficulty. Feeling her warm breath dance across his arm. Clear smell of her fading perfume. Hearing her slight murmurs to herself as she focused on the plot playing out before them. It took a ridiculous amount of his strength to remain relaxed and try to focus on the film.
He almost lost it as Marinette drowsily started to slowly stroke the bare skin of his arm.
"Come on Pix, let's lay down. You're hardly awake currently. I'll turn the film off for us."
".. mmm.. no... I'm.. I'm awake..you're so hot… *yawn* nice and safe... and toasty… I .. I can..*yawwwwn* fin..esh fim.."
Jason choked when said she was hot until he realised that she meant he was warm. Carefully he extracted his arm from her octopus grip and got her lying down, before turning the film off. He left one set of fairy lights on as knew Mariette disliked sleeping in the dark.
Taking a moment to steal himself, Jason watched as Marinette buried herself deeper into the blankets and duvet. He had checked whether it'd be ok to top and tail the bed earlier, Marinette's glare at the suggestion and the insults about his 'big stinking smelly gross' feet being near her face pushed that option out the window pretty quickly. Especially with some of the creative insults thrown in as well.
Despite all his nerves feeling like they were on fire, Jason slowly crawled back in the bed to settle. The soft lighting, the quiet sound of Marinette breathing, the warmth embracing him, Jason suddenly felt all his energy escape. Forcing himself to relax was tiring. Holding himself back was exhausting. The week had been draining. Surprisingly quickly Jason succumbed to sleep.
…………
Jason woke to light filtering into the room. He felt unusually well rested and content. A warm fuzzy happy feeling that he'd not felt in such a long time flowed through him. Sighing he went to turn only to find that he couldn't move.
Sluggish memories and realisations started to speed up and come to the forefront of his mind. That he was sleeping in Marinette's bed. Next…. Under!?!?! Marinette.
It appeared that Marinette had somehow in the night starfished face down across the bed and now her face was resting across his chest. Her hair was a bird's nest of tangles cascading down to his arm. One hand had a razor clam of a grip on the bottom of his shirt unwilling to let go. One leg was tangled up with his.
It would have been a surprise and embarrassing if he hadn't witnessed putting Marinette to bed as a tiny curled up ball to discover her in the morning sprawled out across the bed in a similar fashion to this. Except this time he was semi pinned down by her. He would say the only embarrassment was that he'd forgotten she got like this. And no other reason at all.
As Marinette still slept, Jason's brain slowly woke more and more. He took on his sleeping friend and admired the peace that was on her face. The lack of stress that graced her features. She was gorgeous normally but at this moment she looked ethereal. Jason basked in the morning warmth slowly threading his fingers through her hair to detangle the large knots. He could get used to this. Too used to this. The comfort. The simplicity. The domestic-ness of it all.
Lost in his own thoughts he didn't notice Marinette stir and blearily looked at him with one eye open.
"Mor'n Jay," a croaked voice drew his attention back to his friend lying across his chest, "Di'ja sleep k?"
"Yeah, Pix," came his soft reply, "best night sleep in a while. I understand why you had the lumpy stone of a couch now. You spent all your cash on this cloud of a bed. How did you sleep?"
She turned her face completely into his chest and he felt her chuckle against him before shifting herself so she was now lying curled up next to him, her face closer to his as she rested against his shoulder.
"Best in ages. No nightmares. At all. Never get nightmares when next to you. You make the cloud bed perfect, Should get you to stay in it forever."
Jason turned to gawk at the woman whose eyes remained closed as curled up against him, "Pix, you can't just say things like that!"
"What? Wha'ja mean? What did I say?"
"Saying that I made your bed perfect. That you want me to stay here forever. It gives the whole wrong impression."
"But I meant it, Jay. Last night I slept all the way through because of you. I love being with you. So why wouldn't I want you around?"
Slowly opening her eyes Marinette leant forward and up to kiss his chin before giggling as she moved away.
"Pix, you're killing me here."
"With what weapon? We're in bed and your weapons are next to you, not me…. And why would I kill you?"
Twisting so he could face her properly, Jason gazed as his semi drowsy friend in soft whispered tones said.
“By making it hard not to ruin our friendship. I love what we have now and I don’t want to lose it.”
“What do you mean? You won’t ruin our friendship. We’ve been through too much for it to be ruined.”
“By doing something stupid.”
“Stupid?”
Her eyes widened as she looked at him in puzzlement, more awake than moments earlier. She pursed her lips trying to figure out what he was trying to say was stupid, unconciously drifting closer to him.
“Yeah, something really stupid.”
“Oh… the only thing really to ruin our friendship would be to leave or betray me… you’re not going to be that stupid are you?”
“No, I don’t want to leave you. Ever really. Being like this is perfect. I… I love being with you… you’re my best friend, just don’t tell Roy that.”
Marinetre softly smiling at Jason, “Ok. I won’t. This is almost perfect, but… did you know what would make it better?”
With their foreheads now touching, in the warmth of the blankets and duvets and filtered light pouring in the window, Jason shook his head. He couldn't figure out what she meant to be better. The moment felt like a perfect dream to him.
"No. What would make this better?"
"If you kissed me."
It took a few seconds for Jason's brain to process the words before it was like the dam had burst, all the restraint he'd used in the last 12 hours, for the last number of months, collapsed. Jason leant forward capturing Marinette's lips with his own.
One of her hands reached up and tangled into his hair as the other rested on his chest. His wrapped around her waist pulling her closer. They lost themselves in the moment as they deepened the kiss while pouring their emotions into it, showing their feelings they have been too afraid to say out loud.
Eventually, they parted breathing heavily. Marinette gave a breathy chuckle.
"Finally."
"Huh?"
"It only took you the whole night, then to be told to do that."
"What?!"
Jason's brain struggled to work out what Marinette was saying. His current focus was more on the sensation of holding Marinette so close. His lips still tingled from her kissing her. It was only because her hand moved to cradle his cheek and she kissed his nose that his attention was drawn back to her.
"Jay, you sweet Doofus, I've been flirting with you for months. You've not noticed what's so ever so drastic measures needed to be taken."
"You've been flirting with me???"
"Yes. Even Roy noticed, he helped me with this."
"You mean this was planned?!?"
"Yup. Completely planned. And Roy even helped me get rid of the couch."
"You planned a 'there's only one bed' situation? Sneaky Pix, that's sneaky."
"Worked didn't it. Plus you love the cliche troupes. Don't deny it."
Jason leaned in close to Marinette, a breath away from her.
"Can't deny it, but we've got months of idiocy to catch up on."
With that Marinette closed the gap to capture his lips. They had the rest of the day to work out and discuss how they felt, right now, right now was for kissing and cuddling in bed. Who knew all that together she just needed to replace her couch.
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markosmate · 3 years
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to the dark side
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Pairing; Marko x Emerson!Reader
Summary; Moving to a different state with your younger brothers and mother just to live with your grandfather was hard enough, but falling in love with a vampire and then watching your brother do the same thing? Much different story.
Warnings; strong language + mentions of blood
au:// Part 5 losers, have the whole thing mapped out from here hehe I’m excited for y’all to read everything :))
Part 4   -   Part 6
“Be one of us.” David’s words echoed a couple of times through my head. My eyes flickered between Marko and Michael, wondering why drinking from this bottle initiated someone into the group - yet also wondering if Michael was going to accept this invitation they were giving him.
David held the bottle up and out towards my brother, in a silent sort of offering. As Michael stood to make his way closer to David, the other three boys started softly chanting his name in a mocking fashion. My brother grabbed the bottle from David’s hands, and slowly turned it in between each of his own. Star came up right behind him, and began speaking to him in such a low voice that I could barely hear her from where I was sitting.
“Don’t. You don’t have to, Michael.” She pleaded softly and I could my eyes roll involuntarily. Was this her way of trying to tell him not to be peer pressured? It sure didn’t seem like she cared about pressuring him when she was letting her boyfriend lead him to the edge of a cliff.
“Michael.” David whispered along with the boys, eyes piercing into the side of Mike’s head.
“It’s blood.” Star’s voice was louder this time, like she wanted everyone to hear what she had exposed to him. But, after the whole maggots and worms play - he didn’t seem to want to fall for another one of the group’s tricks.
He chuckled nonchalantly and nodded his head in a sarcastic manner. “Yeah, sure. Blood.” And then he raised the rim of the bottle to his lips and took a few big gulps of whatever it was. The boys let out a few scattered cheers, Paul even pumping his fists into the air in celebratory manner.
But the celebration was short-lived, as the four boys’ gazes turned back to me. Marko moved forward quickly, snatching the bottle away from Mike’s grasp before he could chug down all of it and moving towards where I was sitting. He crouched down in front of me before offering the bottle to me with a sly smirk creeping up on his lips.
“Drink some sweet thing. Be one of us, just like Michael.” I still hadn’t the slightest clue what that was supposed to mean - why would drinking some cheap alcohol out of a home-made bedazzled bottle make you automatically apart of the group? The way they were putting things wasn’t making any sense, but I could overlook that for right now. Because in this moment, Marko was looking at me with such hopeful eyes that I almost couldn’t pick up on the deceit hidden underneath it. But I felt like I’d do anything he asked me to, so I reached forward to take the bottle from his hand.
The boys watched on with excited eyes, eagerly anticipating my next moves. I glanced over towards Star, who had Laddie by the shoulder and was leading him away as she watched Michael with a disappointed gaze. Maybe it was blood? Maybe that’s why she looks so shaken right now? Because Michael had drank some even after she warned him not to? I pushed those thoughts to the back of my mind - I was probably just overthinking - and raised the rim of the bottle to my lips.
The substance came pouring into my mouth and it burned it’s way down my throat. It tasted nothing like any alcohol I’d ever drank before - it was so much stronger, but at the same time so much more addicting. I wanted nothing more than to keep taking swigs of whatever it was but before I could even process what was going on, the bottle was tugged gently from my lips.
The boys all cheered, their shouts echoing through the cave, as Dwayne and Paul began chanting Michael and I’s names. All of my previous rational thoughts of staying far away from these boys and any of the trouble that came along with them were long out the window by now.
The substance I had drank gave me a drunk sort of feel and all I knew was there was a hot dude giving me what seemed to be alcohol and all of his friends cheering my brother and I’s names around us. David yelled out a “Bravo!”, reaching over to take the uncorked bottle from Marko to hand back to Michael.
Paul let out a loud laugh and momentarily stopped his cheering to lean over and clap me on the shoulder. “You’re one of us, girl! Let the good times roll.”
I wanted to be by Marko’s side, but David had beaten me to it. “Give me a ride, Marko.” The curly blond sent me a quick, mischievous grin before standing up and making his way behind David, beginning to push him around the fountain on the wheelchair.
I didn’t know what they meant by that, but they all kept saying it over and over so it had to mean something other than a cheesy initiation. I ignore the feeling in my chest that I had somehow just made a horrible mistake, and continue on partying with the others. I’m just overthinking it after all, these dudes are cool, what could go wrong honestly?
-
The answer was a lot. A lot could go wrong. David announced that we all had somewhere we needed to be, and Michael and I blindly followed the boys out of the cave and back up to the top of the bluff. I’d gotten on the back of Marko’s bike without a second thought, and soon the five bikes were racing through the slim trails of the woods once more.
It didn’t take long before they pulled up next to some train tracks - David, Dwayne, and Michael parking their bikes on one side and Marko and Paul parking their bikes on the other. I climbed off with a little stumble, still feeling the tiniest bit dizzy from drinking whatever alcohol was in the bottle that they gave me. The boys began walking on the tracks, out and over the bridge. 
“Perfect timing.” David led in the front and Marko grabbed one of my belt loops to pull me into his side as he threw his other arm around Dwayne’s shoulders.
“What’s going on?” Michael’s voice echoed.
“Michael wants to know what’s going on.” David teased the slightest bit. Paul laughed a bit as we walked farther out onto the bridge. “Marko,” He spoke again. “What’s going on?”
“I don’t know.” Marko grinned. “What’s goin’ on, Paul?”
“Wait a minute, who wants to know?” Came Paul’s genius reply - quickly followed by,
“Michael wants to know!” From Dwayne, who had finally spoken up for the first time that night.
“I think we should let Michael, and Ivory,” David paused slightly to begin including me in on their hazing. “Know what’s going on.” The platinum leader stopped a few feet ahead of the boys and turned with Michael at his side, before leaning forward the slightest bit to wrap a cold hand around my wrist. He tugged me gently away from Marko’s hip, bringing me to stand next to him and my brother to watch the three others of the group.
“Yeah.” Paul sung out, body practically buzzing with what I could only assume was excitement for what was to come. David tilted his head with a small mischievous smile and spoke once more.
“Marko?” I turned my head back to look at said boy once more with furrowed eyebrows.
He wasn’t looking at me however, instead opting to stare only at my brother. He lifted his hand and twirled his fingers in a small sort of wave before grinning wickedly. “Goodnight Michael.” Before he dropped with an echoing “Bombs away!” I gasped, my head whipping around to look at David yet his expression hadn’t changed a bit.
Michael’s jaw hung open in pure confusion, only confirming that he too had seen what I had. Paul stepped forward with a similar grin and looked between Michael and I quickly. “Bottoms up, man. Yeow!” He dropped just as suddenly, and was quickly followed by Dwayne who only shot us silent finger guns before dropping down the same opening in the bars that the previous two had. I stared, absolute shock and fear cursing through my blood. Had they just literally jumped to their deaths right in front of us? They couldn’t have, how would that make any sense?
David moved to step in front of us, and with a hand on Michael’s shoulder he leaned in the slightest bit to speak. “Come with us, guys.” Before he, too, stepped off the edge and dropped through the bars. With one short glance at my brother, who was too busy staring at where David had just fallen to notice I was looking at him, I rushed forward and kneeled on the edge to stare down into the fog. A huff of relief left my lungs and I laughed breathily as I stared down at the four boys hanging from the support beams.
The four cheered a bit, finally making some noise once Michael leaned down next to me, curiosity ultimately getting the best of him. “Hey, Ivory!” Marko called up with a grin on his lips, attention then momentarily taken from me as Paul swung his legs up to kick at the shorter boy.
“Michael and Ivory Emerson!” David’s rough voice cut through the other boy’s cheerful shouts. “Come on down!” He taunted, his laugh afterwards cause the nerves in my body to go haywire. I never thought I’d genuinely come face-to-face with the expression about all of your friends jumping off of a bridge, but here we were now.
I grinned at Michael and clapped him on the shoulder teasingly before moving to climb down onto the bar across from Paul. My arm strength wasn’t nearly as good as Michael’s, but adrenaline was coursing through my body at such a rate that I didn’t care. “There ya go, girl!” Paul laughed loudly kicking at my legs this time instead of Marko’s. I reacted just as quickly, kicking back at him in a competitive manner as the grin on my face grew. I saw Michael climb down in front of David out of the corner of my eye as Marko began to shout once more.
“Yeah, let’s play a game! Let’s play a game, baby!” He dragged out each syllable of the last word and my stomach flipped a few times at his voice, but I needed to focus more on not falling to my death than whatever it was he was getting at.
Paul laughed along with his friend. “Welcome aboard, Michael.”
David’s chilling laugh echoed once more, and the wind carried his voice to me though I could tell he was only really speaking to Michael. “Fun, huh?” Suddenly the tracks above us began to vibrate, and not long after they began to viciously shake as the horn of a train blared through the night. I felt my stomach squeeze uncomfortably as the boys continued their obnoxious shouts. I glanced over in Marko’s direction for some reassurance only to see him pulling himself up once through the bars before dropping down to hang once more with a mocking grin on his face. He wasn’t looking at me though, his attention was over towards Michael who I could vaguely hear shouting, “Jesus Christ!”
“Yeah!” Paul laughed, suddenly letting go of the bars and falling into the fog below. As if this entire thing wasn’t insane enough, I felt my heart drop. “Oh my God!” I cried, looking down to see if I could spot him but there was still only fog below us. My arms were burning, and I knew there was no way I’d be able to hold on much longer - never-mind try and pull myself up and over the bars to safety once the train passed.
Marko caught my eye and he sent me a wink, eyes sparkling as if he knew something I didn’t. “Don’t be scared, Ivory!” Then he let go as well, yelling out as he fell the same way Paul did.
“Jesus Christ!” Michael’s voice met my ears again, as suddenly Dwayne fell from my side as well, yelling on his way down.
“Guys!” David yelled to the both of us. “You’re one of us! Let go!”
“And do what?” I shouted at him incredulously, was he fucking serious? Were the other three dead right now? And now he was telling us to let go too?
“You are one of us, Ivory.” He assured once more before falling into the fog as well.
“David!” Michael screamed after him. The train finally passed, and the bars stopped shaking in our grasps. I looked over at my brother with wide eyes, how the hell were we supposed to get ourselves out of this one? I watched as he tried to pull himself up to no avail, and right as I went to speak to him I heard shouts from below us. It was the boys - they were alive! How the fuck were they alive?
I glanced over to Michael who was trying to pull himself up once more and felt my grip begin to slip drastically. “I’m gonna let go.”
“What?” His voice was strained and he glared straight into my soul. “No, are you insane? You’ll die!”
“I can’t hold on anymore, Mike. And they survived somehow, there’s gotta be water or something below.” And before he could even begin to protest more, my hands slipped from the bar. I screamed as I fell, the thick fog enveloping me completely and all my senses seemed to be blocked out.
I could vaguely hear my name being whispered over and over again and I was almost completely positive that I had blacked out and was just hallucinating this excruciatingly long fall. Right before everything went dark, a pair of arms cut my fall short as my eyes fluttered closed.
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let-them-read-fics · 3 years
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Conflicted Connections
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Requested By @rc11: “Reader is drunk and calls Rosé to pick her up since she’s worried. And on the way home, the reader confesses but since she knows Rosé is out of her league she gets all sad. All fluff throughout the way, and the next day she avoids Rosé since she recalls herself confessing and is to embarrassed to face her. Gets a lil bit angst but then they somehow make up at the end.”
Pairing: Rosé x Fem!Reader
Word Count: ~ 6,505
Warnings / Misc. – Mentions Of Alcohol & Partying, Angst, Fluff
Disclaimer: This writing is a work of fiction, and no disrespect is meant for those mentioned herein. 
A/N: Thank you for the request! I had fun writing this one, and I really hope you enjoy it. I stuck with the gist, but I added quite a bit :) AND WHO ELSE IS HYPED FOR THE SHOW??? 🥳 I can’t wait to see our girls own that stage 😌
PS ~~ The song used is called "Baby, I Love You" by Tiffany Alvord, and it was specially requested.
🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤
With yet another steaming cup of tea in hand, Rosé makes her way back to her room, settling onto the soft cushions of the bed. Her notebook lays open in front of her, lyrics and annotations beautifully etched into the paper. 
She pulls her guitar back into her lap now, allowing her fingers to glide along the strings as she strums out whatever comes to mind. Nothing makes her feel as relaxed as this; she's free to sing whatever she feels -- to play whatever feels right. If only for a little while, she can connect back to her roots and remember how she felt as a little girl; when her heart and mind were unburdened by fear of judgement.
Life isn't always easy, but she takes comfort in the fact that her love of music will always remain childlike, in the sense that there's always something new to discover or tell the world. It goes without saying that being a songwriter is much easier when you're inspired, and Rosé can attest to that. A certain someone has become her muse over the course of the past few months, and her mind is constantly filled with ideas for new material. 
As another line pops into her head, she takes the page between her fingers to flip to a clean sheet. A few seconds later, thinking she found one, she begins writing. Soon, though, she discovers that this wasn't an empty page: in the upper right hand corner, a small heart is drawn, encompassing the words "Hi Rosie" and a small smiley face. Your initials are printed next to the doodle, and the sight brings a soft smile to her face. You must've sneakily drawn that when she wasn't looking one day. 
Her fingers run along the markings, tracing over the lines as your face flashes in her mind for the millionth time today. The universe must've been listening, because no more than 5 minutes later, her phone starts ringing. She reaches backwards towards the bedside table, and her fingers soon make contact with the device. 
"Hey, I was just thinking about you--" She starts, before being interrupted. 
"BABY YOU LIGHT UP MY WORLD LIKE NOBODY ELSE--" Your voice booms through the phone as you sing loudly, nearly making Rosé go deaf in the process. She blinks a few times to refocus her thoughts before chuckling lightly.
"Y/N?"
"Rosie I'm at this really fun party, you should come hang out!" Your words come out slightly slurred, but excited nonetheless. It's a bit hard for her to hear you now over the music blasting in the background. 
"Ah, I don't know…" She trails off, voice unsure. She'd much rather spend the evening writing about you than at some random party. 
"Pleaaseee?" You drag out, making sure to whine for even more emphasis. "I miss you." 
Rosé's heart skips a beat at that last part, now thudding obnoxiously loud in her chest. She misses you too, probably more than a 'friend' should, but she can't help it -- you're simply too amazing.
She takes a breath, knowing that she'll likely regret her next decision -- after all, hiding her feelings becomes harder every time she's around you. Regardless, she can't find it in herself to say no to you. "Alright, fine. Where are you again?"
You let out a loud cheer upon hearing her cave in, and she just knows you look like a dork, likely having that stupid little smirk on your lips that she loves so much. 
After getting the address from you, she goes into her closet to find a good outfit. For anyone else, she might've just shown up in whatever was comfortable; but knowing that you're there is enough motivation for her to put a bit more effort into it. 
Her signature style shines through: she dons a black crop top and jeans, paired with a long, hickory colored trench coat. She finishes the look off with her white sneakers, giving the outfit that final umph that it needed.
With one last look in the mirror, she adjusts her clothes and hair again before heading out.
-----
The moment that Rosé steps foot inside the house, her eyes widen. She's been to plenty of parties before, but never one as chaotic as this. A large crowd is gathered in the living room, making the area that was likely once spacious now appear cramped and tiny. Some people move with the rhythm, while others dance wildly to the beat of their own drum. The music was audible from outside, but inside is a whole nother story: it's nearly deafening now. 
In front of her, just past the living room, two guys are fist fighting. To her left, a long hallway is filled with couples making out, likely on their way to the bedrooms. She grimaces before pushing her way past everyone and walking towards the kitchen.
The bright strobe lights from the living room still manage to reach the area, but things are definitely a little calmer here. That's not to say that it's quiet, though: people are gathered around the counters, downing shots and cheering each other on at the same time. Some stumble around, nearly falling over as their friends laugh hysterically and help keep them vertical.
In the adjacent room, two teams of partygoers are busy playing beer pong. It seems to be boys vs girls, and Rose smirks when she discovers the latter are in the lead. 
She scans the rooms one more time, but you're still nowhere to be found. A pang of worry settles in her chest, but it only makes her more determined to find you.
And, 10 minutes later, she does. You're outside in the backyard, sitting near the fire pit with a bottle of wine in your hand. The flames are dying down now, long ago forgotten about -- the stars shining in the midnight sky had captivated you, stealing your attention away from keeping the fire fed. 
Before she begins her journey over to you, she takes a moment to appreciate how beautiful you look. The remaining embers flicker lazily, creating a deep haze that casts onto your body. The shadows contrast with the light, making your features pop in all the right ways. The sound of someone shouting again brings her out of her daze, and Rose makes her way to you.
At first, you don't notice her. Your eyes are wide, filled with wonder as you gaze up at the sky in awe. Space has always baffled you, and Rose thinks you look adorable when you get like this. 
"Y/N," she says gently, standing beside your chair. After pulling your eyes away from the sky, you meet her gaze. A light blush rises to your cheeks at the way she's looking at you. 
"Hi Rosie," you slur. The words come out cutely, but she can tell that you're much drunker than you had been when you called earlier. 
"How much have you had?"
You scrunch your face up in thought as the last two functioning brain cells in your head go to work. She can practically see the wheels turning, and she can't help but laugh at the look of effort on your face. 
"...a lot." You ultimately conclude, taking far too long to come up with such a simple answer. "Alex gave me a couple of his special mixes earlier, I had some shots, and now--" you declare, holding the wine bottle up triumphantly, "--this!"
As soon as she heard his name leave your lips, she frowned. Alex is one of your coworkers and friends, and he's totally in love with you. You're oblivious to it, but Rose isn't and she can't stand him. On top of the fact that he's a guy, he has the audacity to like you? Well, she can't exactly blame him for those things, but that doesn't mean that she has to like him. She's civil around him for your sake, but that's all.
"Do you want some?" You ask, always willing to offer her whatever you have. Sharing is caring, and you definitely care about a certain Australian beauty. 
She looks down at you before shaking her head. "No, I'm good." You swish the liquid around, peering down into the bottle as it glides from side to side. "Me too," you say, setting it down beside your chair. "Let's go dance!" You suggest excitedly, using your strength to hoist your body out of the seat. Sorely miscalculating your moves, your foot doesn't quite connect with the ground how you intended; you stumble, falling right into Rosie's waiting arms.
She was watching you carefully, having a feeling that this would happen. 
"Nope, I'm taking you home. No dancing for you." You whine and pout, but Rose doesn't budge. Eventually you give up, and allow her to hold you close as she helps you walk out of the house. You rest your head on her shoulder, and she has to fight the butterflies that take flight.
As the two of you near the door, Rose spots Alex in the living room. She shoots him a cocky grin, as if to say 'checkmate' before she leads you out the door.
-----
The ride home was getting off to a rather interesting start. It took Rosie a while to wrangle you into the car and buckle you in, but she eventually managed to do it. Now, though, a new problem is arising: you're being flirty, and she doesn't know what to do with herself.
"You're so pretty," you compliment, leaning over the center console to whisper the phrase in her ear. She gulps and attempts to calm her heart down, but she's having trouble. "Shush," she commands, blushing as she lets out a little giggle. She tries to remind herself that you're just drunk -- that there's no real meaning behind your words -- but it feels good to pretend.
After a moment, you return to your seat, and she lets out a sigh of relief. 
Barely 2 minutes later, you place a hand on her knee, saying gently, "You always take such good care of me. Thank you, Rose." She sneaks a glance at you, and her heart nearly melts at the smile you're sending her way. Your eyes are shining with sincerity, and she'd surely get lost in them if she weren't busy driving. 
The rest of the ride is filled with more flirting and compliments from you, all of which send her into a gay panic, but she wouldn't have wanted it any other way.
----
Now, laying in your bed as Rosé rounds up some pajamas for you, the effects of the alcohol really begin setting in. You're still in the playful, teasing phase, but you know you'll have a major hangover tomorrow. Whatever Alex put in those drinks is catching up with you and running its course throughout your body.
"Rosie, do you like anyone?" You call out, toying with your fingers like a toddler. She emerges from the bathroom, washcloth in hand, just as you ask the very words she's been fearing.
She goes to respond, but you interrupt her with a drunken giggle. "Because I do. Her name rhymes with nosey." You chuckle at yourself, but she's too busy trying not to freak out to return the gesture. When you don't question her further, she relaxes her shoulders. How many more times could she get away with avoiding her feelings?
She pushes the scary thought away, instead opting to bring over your clothes and give you a minute to change. Thankfully you're coherent enough to do that on your own -- the thought of you flirting with her while half naked and self-assured sends her wild, and she knows she'd slip up and confess. 
Once you're dressed, she comes back over to the bed and sits down in front of you. She brings the rag up to your face and slides it across your cheeks and neck, knowing just what you need. This isn't the first time she's done this for you, and she can't deny the rush she feels when you look up at her with those big eyes, filled with gratitude.
You sigh at the coolness, relishing in the way that it soothes your hot skin. A soft thank you slips past your lips as your eyelids flutter shut, and Rosé almost lets herself imagine that you're hers. That she just brought her girlfriend back home and now she's taking care of her. But before she can get too lost in that fantasy, she pulls away, slipping the rag into your hand so that you can use it on yourself now.
"Well, I think my work here is done." She declares, patting your leg lovingly. She moves to stand, and the action prompts you to speak up.
"Wait," you start, grabbing her wrist before she can get away. You meant to tug gently, but you must've misjudged your strength; in an instant, she's close to you again, just a breath away. Her face is right in front of yours, and you can feel her warm breath against your lips. 
Her eyes are wide now, and a subtle tremble runs through her. She's never been this close to you, and although she's terrified, she doesn't want to move away. She wants to give in -- to lean forward the tiniest bit and capture your lips -- but she can't. Her breathing becomes labored as she notices your gaze move from her eyes to her lips. Do you like her back? Surely not, you're just drunk...right?
Her pink lips look so kissable right now, the gloss on them shining in the low lamplight. She's close enough that you can smell her fruity shampoo and feel every jagged breath she draws in.
"Y/N--" 
That's all it takes to set you into motion. You bring a hand up to her cheek, cupping it sweetly as you press your lips to hers. She sighs at the contact, melting into your embrace, and allows herself to let her walls down. Her lips move against yours slowly, unsure -- this is new for both of you, and you're testing the waters. One of her hands comes up to rest against the back of your neck, and she pulls you impossibly closer. 
After she subconsciously bites your lip - the action drawing a groan from you - she snaps back to reality and pulls away. Her lips are red and swollen, and you have to stop yourself from leaning back in. She looks like she wants to do the same, but she centers herself before she can.
"I, uh, I'm gonna go. Goodnight, Y/N." She says breathlessly, swallowing as she runs a hand through her hair. She doesn't give herself anymore time to change her mind, and soon she's rushing out, failing to even give you so much as a second glance. 
Shocked, you sit back and let your mind try and piece together what the hell just happened. The kiss worked well in sobering you up, at least for the time being, but you wish it hadn't. Now, you're forced to sit alone with your feelings again, lips still tingling with the memory of hers against them.
----
The Next Morning
*ring ring*
The blare of your ringtone sounds especially loud now, making you wince in pain. Your head is pounding, and that definitely isn't helping. Quickly, you roll over and pick it up, keeping your eyes closed as you press the button and hold it to your ear. "Hello?" You ask groggily, voice still laced with sleep.
"Hey, Y/N. The girls and I are going out later; do you wanna come with?" Jennie's sweet voice asks. You rub your forehead, now opening your eyes and staring at the ceiling as you ponder your options. With a glance at the clock, you see that you've already slept a good portion of the day away.
"I'd love to, but I'm pretty hungover right now Jen." You chuckle despite yourself, grinning when she laughs back.
"Rosie told us you might be dealing with that." Jennie laughs again, but you go quiet. Did she tell them everything that happened, or did she try and forget about it? After all, she basically ran away -- surely she regrets it. You scold yourself for even thinking that someone as out of your league as Rosé could like you back.
"Jisoo whipped up her special 'hangover-reverser' drink for you, as she calls it." She adds, hoping that'll win you over. Lost in your thoughts, you forget to answer her. 
Jennie takes your silence the wrong way, saying, "You don't have to come, but we'd love to hang out." She sounds sad at the thought of you staying home, and a feeling of guilt creeps into your mind. Work has kept you from hanging out with all of them recently, and they miss you. You miss them too, and quickly decide that a hangover (and the awkward situation you'll be subjected to when face to face with Rosé) aren't enough of a deal breaker to decline their offer. 
"I'll be over in a few. Tell Jisoo to make a couple more for the road… I'll need all the help I can get." 
Jennie laughs again, and you pep up at the sweet sound. She celebrates, and you can hear the girls clapping in the background, shouting praise at her for convincing you to come. The two of you say your goodbyes, and you begin getting ready.
-----
"Jisoo, you're a lifesaver." You confess, flopping back onto the couch. The unnie responds with a smug, "I know," from her place in front of the mirror. 
You lick the remaining liquid from your lips, and Rose shifts in her seat across the room. She can't get the feeling of your kiss out of her mind, and seeing you do that only makes things worse. 
"Here's the second one," Lisa says, smirking as she pats your shoulder and hands you the cup. You smile back at her and smack her butt as a wordless thank you.
"Alright, so where exactly are we going, girls?" You ask as you tuck your feet underneath your body.
"I was thinking we could shop around Hongdae. They changed some stuff since we were there last, and it looks awesome." Jennie informs.
"Sounds good to me." Jisoo replies from the adjacent room, applying the finishing touches to her makeup. 
Lisa agrees as well, and so does Rosie. At the sound of her soft voice, you make eye contact with her for the first time today. Ever since you arrived earlier, you've avoided her. She's done much the same, refraining from saying much to you at all. The girls haven't seemed to pick up on the tension yet, but they're observant; surely it won't take them long. 
As you replay the fateful events in your mind again, you allow your head to lull back and rest against the cushion of the couch. Last night, Rosé’s eyes were speaking all of the words she could never tell you out loud, sparkling with repressed desire. It wasn't hard to tell that she was nervous, but she kissed you like she had been waiting to for an eternity. So, clearly, your confusion at the whole situation is understandable. Why did she run away?
"Ready?" Jisoo asks, kicking your foot to get your attention. 
"As I'll ever be." You state as you stick a hand out to her. She understands immediately, swiftly helping you up. A little groan leaves you, your head spinning from standing up so quickly, so she doesn't move until you get adjusted. 
"Thanks," you smile, giving her a sweet kiss on the cheek. Having such good friends always comes in handy, but there's something special to the little moments like these. She hums in response, and the two of you lead the way out to the car.
Rosé watches the whole encounter as she falls in line behind you, wishing she were in Jisoo's place. Last night was a wake up call for her, unexpected in literally every way, and she panicked. Looking back now, she wishes she would've at least explained her behavior to you. The kiss awakened something within her, releasing all of the feelings she's held in for so long. She didn't rush out because she didn't enjoy the kiss; if she had any idea that that's the impression it left on you, she would've ran back in and kissed you a million times over.
Lisa notices Rosie's furrowed brow and downcast eyes, and instantly knows something's up. 
Now in the car, she leans in close to ask, "Everything okay?" 
"Mhm." Rosie replies, doing her best to sound like her normal self. 
The years have made Lisa an expert at reading the slightly older girl, but she doesn't want to push her. If she wants to talk about it, she will.
"Okay…" Lisa trails off, coincidentally making fleeting eye contact with you through the rearview mirror. On any other day, you would've fought Lisa over the seat next to Rosé; but today, of course, is unlike any other. You're in uncharted territory now, and you have no idea when -- or if -- you'll return to normal. For now, you make do with the passenger's seat, keeping yourself busy by looking out the window. Jennie's driving is smooth, and you appreciate that in your altered state. A low pulsing still vibrates through your head every now and then, but it's become much more bearable. Jisoo truly knows what she's doing with that concoction.
----
Hongdae, Seoul -- A Few Hours Later
"Jennie," Lisa huffs out, struggling to carry everything she’s been handed. "How much stuff do you need?!" The maknae does her best to keep the bags from touching the ground, but that task is proving difficult. 
"We're almost there!" Jennie says, dismissing the younger girls complaints. 
A few minutes later, you're seated at the new restaurant Jennie's spent the night talking about. Seeing the girls so happy today has taken your mind off of your own problems somewhat, but sometimes the issues are unavoidable… like right now. 
Though she tries to be discreet about it -- even going so far as to hide behind her menu -- you can feel Rosé's eyes on you. The waiter seated you at a booth, and of course she happened to sit right in front of you. Having her attention has always been something you enjoy, but you're so embarrassed about what happened that you can't help but shy away from it now. If drunkenly confessing your feelings for her wasn't bad enough, you also kissed her. What could be next?
Rosie's dying on the inside a little more with every minute that passes. The past few hours were filled with plenty of fun and stupidity for the lot of you, stopping in just about every store you came across and joking all the while. But the entire time, you and Rosé kept your distance. Occasionally you'd crack a joke to make her laugh or the two of you would share a look, but the air around you was always thick with the emotions you couldn't give voice to. It also doesn't help that part of Rosé is afraid you didn't even really mean to kiss her. If she blames it on your drunkenness, she doesn't have to process her feelings; she can just go back to suffering in silence. When she looks at you, though, she knows there's no denying what you both feel for each other. 
"Can I get you started with some drinks?" The waiter approaches again, pen and pad ready to go.
"Do you have sikhye?" You inquire, raising your head to look at him.
"We do."
"Great," you smile, getting an idea. "I'll take one of those and a glass of water, please." He jots down your request before recording the other orders and setting off to get the drinks prepared. 
In order to preserve the plan, you don't dare look in Rosé's eyes.
A couple minutes later, he returns with a big tray of drinks; it's a wonder he didn't accidently drop any on the way. Jennie and Jisoo ordered multiple for the table so you could sample them, and you smile at the gesture. They all look tasty, but one in particular catches your attention.
When he hands it to you, you wordlessly slide it over to Rosé. You know she loves it, and you did order it for her, after all. She lets out a little gasp of excitement, and you choose this moment to really look at her. Her eyes are shining again, and you laugh -- if anything is capable of cheering her up, it's something that she can eat or drink.
She beams at you while extending her hand, gently resting it against yours on the table. It's warm and comforting, and you can't help but want to hold it forever. Her fingertips brush against the soft skin of your wrist, and you almost melt at the tenderness of the motion. 
Thankfully the other girls aren't paying attention, or else you'd be thoroughly embarrassed. They continue on with their conversation, leaving you and Rosé to get lost in your own world for the next while.
More time passes, in which you place your food orders and the waiter later brings it out to you.
"Enjoy, ladies." He declares before bowing and returning to the host stand. 
"It looks so yummy," Rose moans, snatching up her chopsticks before digging in. The other girls agree as well, and soon all of you are eating like there's no tomorrow. The flavors go perfectly together, and you pat yourself on the back for choosing the dish you did.
"Do you wanna try some?" You ask after noticing Rose eyeing your plate. You quirk an eyebrow at her as you wait for her answer, which comes in the form of a sheepish nod. 
"That's my girl," you declare with a smile on your face, happy to bring back some of your playful banter. Rosie's heart speeds up at the title, but she tries not to show it too much. Although it's a bit unmannerly, you reach a bite of your food across the table to her and grin when she takes it. Her cheeks puff out in that signature chipmunk pose, and your smile widens. 
"Yah, that's delicious." She sighs, closing her eyes to allow her palate to focus on the flavors. 
You shake your head at how much of a dork she is for food, but giggle despite yourself. She really is the cutest.
-----
"Good evening, everyone, this is the manager speaking. Our lounge area will open in 10 minutes, and karaoke will begin shortly after!" 
Lisa looks at Jennie incredulously, her mouth hanging open. "They have karaoke, too?? How cool is that!" 
Jennie smirks, knowing how good she is at choosing places to take you guys. This joint is definitely somewhere that you'll frequent whenever you're around. "I know right?" She asks, satisfied with herself.
In Rosie's eyes, the karaoke announcement was fate working its magic. She's spent the day mulling over everything that's transpired, deciding earlier that all she needed was one more sign. Now that she had that last little push, all she has left to do is gather up all the courage she possesses. 
As the 5 of you finish up your meals and wait for it to kick off, she racks her brain for the perfect song to sing. She's going to confess.
---
Fully stuffed and satisfied with the amazing dinner you just had, you all follow the waiter towards the lounge area. Located in the back of the restaurant, it's complete with 1 main, corner stage, and 2 smaller ones off to the side. Plush couches and chairs stretch out in front of the stages, allowing the audience to kick back and enjoy the performances. 
A small bar is tucked away in the far corner of the room, stocked with a vast array of different liquors and mixes. Strips of light line the shelves behind the bartender, giving the space its own unique style, and you take some time to admire it all. A few small disco balls hang from the ceiling, placed strategically throughout the room to allow for the most amount of ambience possible. All of the different colors of the rainbow take their turn cycling through the projector, flashing and shining around the room in their random patterns. It's a very welcoming place to be.
You're the first guests in there, so you're free to choose whatever stage you want. "Which one should we go to?" Jisoo asks, doing a little half spin as she looks around the room. 
"Really, unnie? You have to ask?" Lisa rolls her eyes and scoffs; she thought her best friend knew her better than that. Obviously Lisa wants to go to the big stage. How else would she show off all of her moves while she sings?
"You're so dramatic." Jisoo grumbles, sending the maknae an annoyed look of her own as she's dragged over to the performance area. You, Jennie, and Rosé trail after them, shaking your heads at their behavior. 
----
"Come on, we're going first." You bite back a laugh as you watch Lisa tug Jennie up from her spot on the sofa, where she had just sat down and gotten comfortable. Jennie tries to protest, even pointing at the drink she just got from the bar to convince Lisa to let her stay, but she isn't having it. They walk over to the kiosk built into the wall, and take their time in choosing a song to sing.
Their performance is a wild ride, to say the least. Lisa forgets the words at one point, opting to compensate by freestyling a rap and dancing around wildly while everyone hypes her up. She could've just looked at the lyrics on the stage screen, you realize, but that wouldn't have been even half as fun. Jennie breaks into the box of props sitting just off stage, pulling out a multicolored, frilly scarf and wrapping it around her singing partner. To finish off her own look, she rummages around until she finds a comically large top hat and pair of heart shaped glasses.
"Golden buzzer!" You shout out, pressing an imaginary button on the table. The girls celebrate, and your combined laughter fills the room. 
Next up is Jisoo, who decides to put her charm on full display and serenade all of you. She starts off on stage, letting her deep voice lull you into a state of entrancement before she approaches the couch. She greets each of you individually, giving you separate attention just like a rock star would, and all of you go wild for her. She tries to keep up the edgy, heartthrob persona, but it fades a bit when she cracks a smile, her eyes turning into those adorable crescents that you all love so much.
As her song comes to an end, you excuse yourself to the bathroom. In order to go through with your plan -- that is, singing a song to Rosie -- you have to calm your nerves a bit first. You splash water on your face and sigh as the chilly liquid slides down your skin. A bead of it trails down your neck, soaking into the cotton of your collar the second it hits it, and you're reminded of last night. A familiar warmth runs through you at the memory of Rosé's hands on your body, taking care of you like always. She's the definition of girlfriend material, and you always kick yourself for waiting so long to tell her about your feelings.
A basket of paper towels sits on the marble countertop of the sink, and you reach forward to grab one and dry your face. With one final look in the mirror, you throw the paper away and exit the restroom. 
Too busy mentally preparing yourself for the performance, you fail to notice that Rosé is already standing on the stage, mic in hand. You lift your head as you near the stage, and she makes eye contact with you; she looks nervous, so you give her a reassuring smile and move back to your seat. Behind the nervousness, you can see how excited she is; you're intrigued. 
"So, this song goes out to a very special girl here tonight. I hope you like it." She announces shyly, garnering some applause from the small group of diners that have filtered their way in from the restaurant. She presses play, and shakes her hands out in an attempt to get rid of the anxiety building within her. Up until now, keeping her worries in check had been doable; though as she stands alone on stage, looking down at the object of her affection, she's afraid all over again. And yet, somehow in an instant, you take some of those fears away. You're looking at her with so much love and encouragement in your eyes that Rosé thinks she can accomplish anything. 
The song -- one you're hearing for the first time tonight -- picks up, and she begins.
There are three words, & I want you to know they are true
There are three words, that I've been dying to say to you 
Burns in my heart, like a fire that ain't goin' out
I need to let you know
You're unintentionally holding in a breath as she croons the words out, singing straight to you. Her soulful vocals ring out across the space, making goosebumps appear on your skin; her voice always strikes a certain chord within you, the beautiful tones sounding like Heaven. She makes it feel like you're the only two people in the room; that even the world stopped for a moment to watch this play out.
I wanna say I love you, I wanna hold you tight
I want your arms around me & I, want your lips on mine
I wanna say I love you, but, babe I'm terrified
My hands are shaking, my heart is racing
Cause it's something I can't hide, it's something I can't deny
So here I go
Baby I lo-o-o-ve you
The smile on your face can't be wiped away by anything; no natural force of the universe could get in the way of this. Your heart swells at her confession as things finally fall into place. Possessed by the love you hold for the goddess in front of you, you decide to be brave and join her on stage. 
She squeals and covers her face as you approach, and the audience erupts into cheers at this. They whistle and clap loudly, and you can hear the distinct voices of the girls from behind you. Pulling her hands away, Rosé's adorable face is revealed in all its glory. She has tears in her eyes, and they let you know that the past 48 hours have been just as much of an emotional rollercoaster for her as they have been for you.
You press a kiss to the back of her hand, feeling your chest tighten at the way it lightly shakes against your lips. You take a step closer and wrap your arms around her waist as she hooks her right one around your shoulders. Her left hand holds the mic between you two, making it so that you can sing the next part together. 
I've never said, these words to anyone, anyone at all
Never got this close, cause I was always afraid I would fall
But now I know, that I'll fall right in-to your arms
Don't ever let me go
I wanna say I love you, I wanna hold you tight
I want your arms around me & I, want your lips on mine
I wanna say I love you, but, babe I'm terrified
My hands are shaking, my heart is racing
Cause it's something I can't hide, it's something I can't deny
So here I go
Baby I lo-o-o-ve you
The entire time you're singing, she can't take her eyes off of you. She watches as your lips move along with the words, your face scrunching up occasionally to aid in hitting all the notes, and she even forgets to keep singing a couple times. You're so close to her, just like last night. She vows that this time will be different, though. 
After you finish the verse, Rosé surges forward, closing what little distance is left between you. During the performance you had gradually migrated closer to one another, so that made her job all the more easy.
She leans into you and smiles at the feeling of your racing heart. It lets her know that this is actually happening -- that after spending so many months waiting to finally confess and have you return her feelings, it's happening.
She tastes the strawberry chapstick on your lips, and it reminds her of the time she told you it's her favorite type. You used to wear a vanilla kind… does that mean you switched to strawberry after she told you that? (Yes, yes it does).
You bring your right hand up to her jaw and cup it as you move to deepen the kiss. A soft groan escapes her lips at this, and she doesn't waste any time in kissing you back even harder than before. It's long-overdue, and she can't get enough of you.
All too quickly, though, Rosie gets lost in the embrace, and the lounge is filled with feedback as the mic drops to the floor. She jumps at the sudden noise before snatching it up, her face crimson with embarrassment. After placing it back on the stand, she turns to hide her face in your neck. You just chuckle as you wrap your arms around her again. She snuggles in close to you, and you rest your head against hers.
"Awwww, they grow up so fast!" Jisoo wails, wiping imaginary tears from her eyes. 
"Cough it up, Jendeukie." Lisa smirks, sticking a hand out in front of the other girl. Jennie shoots her a glare, but nonetheless reaches to the table in front of her to grab her purse. 
"Not another word, Manoban." Jennie says, shoving the 5 dollar bill into Lisa's waiting palm.
The younger girl clears her throat dramatically before saying loudly, "I TOLD YOU SO! Nobody ever listens to the maknae." 
You and Rosé can't contain your laughter anymore, and neither can the girls.
Soon the two of you are back on the couches, cuddling in the corner seat as the others make kissy noises at you. 
She's nestled up against your side, resting her head against your chest contently. 
"I know we kinda did things out of order and all, but I might as well ask. Will you be my girlfriend?" You smile dorkily as she raises up to look at you, a playful smirk of her own tugging at her lips. 
"Absolutely, Y/N." She has stars in her eyes and a dreamy expression on her features as she leans in to kiss you again. 
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fruitcoops · 3 years
Text
Accidental Family
Hey folks! This is one of two fics for the six month celebration of this blog! Woohoo! Blood on the Ice is one of the most popular series I've written, and expanding it into Josie’s (@prohibitionincurls ) Winging It world with her was unbelievably fun. Disclaimer: one of the OCs has ADHD and it is a central theme of the story--while Josie based some of his characteristics on her own experience, we both recognize that this is not a one-size-fits-all situation. Thank you again for six amazing months, and I hope you enjoy!
Lots of love,
Eve <3
TW for mentioned injury
“Oh my god, they’re gonna kill me,” the kid whispered in a wavering voice, sounding much younger than he actually was as he left the penalty box.
“They’re not going to kill you,” Bowie soothed, still watching the tunnel where Remus had disappeared mere minutes earlier. From what he saw, there had been a bit of blood, but the bruising didn’t look too bad. Then again, there had barely been enough time for anything to visibly swell before he was whisked away.
“Can I just stay in the box?” Felix cast a look toward the Lions bench and his voice cracked. “They can’t yell at me in the box, right?”
“Hey. Look at me, Marty.” Bowie took him by the shoulders and gave him a gentle shake. “The Lions are good guys. They’re not going to hurt you, but you did just fuck up one of their best friends. What would you do if someone hit me in the face?”
“Come on, man, I’m a terrible fighter. I don’t know how well I’d be able to defend your honor after something like that. It was an accident. Do you think they know it was an accident? Should I go tell them?”
“I know. They know. Loops definitely knows. But that doesn’t mean it didn’t happen, so I wouldn’t be surprised if they’re a little cold at first.” He ruffled the rookie’s hair and turned back to the game; the Lions were moving fast and brutal, slicing right through their defense for yet another goal. Shit. Felix clearly felt bad enough already--losing the game wouldn’t make him feel any better. 
They ended up losing the game.
Bowie had figured it might happen; he would have had the same fire if it had been his teammate that got clocked like that. Hell, he used to have the same fire when he and Remus had played together, so he completely understood. 
That did not change the fact that once they got home, Felix was still borderline inconsolable. The 18-year-old wasn’t technically billeting with them, but the apartment he was renting just so happened to be in the same building, on the same floor, and right across the hall from his and Simon’s. This led to an informal adoption of the rookie and he was around their house at least five times a week, if not more. 
Felix Martin was a good kid, and that idea was confirmed when Kronk immediately took a liking to him; the cat loved nobody but the three of them. Bowie was grateful that he and Simon were there to quell some of the homesickness that came from moving out to a new city on his own for the first time. The transition was always tough, but they could provide a little support.
They parted ways from the team when the bus got back from the rink and drove to their building in silence. Once they made their way up the stairs and down the hall, Felix moved to go back to his apartment. 
“Nope,” Bowie said immediately, placing a hand on his shoulder and steering him through the door to his and Simon’s place. It wasn’t a good idea for Felix to be alone right now--there was nothing to do alone after a loss aside from beat himself up about it, and Bowie would be damned before he let that happen. 
Simon and Kronk were perched on the couch, but they both moved into the kitchen as soon as the door clicked closed. Simon took one look at the pair and carefully wrapped his arms around Felix; the kid practically melted. The three of them stood there for a moment until Simon pulled back a bit and tilted his head toward the living room. Felix nodded and Bowie followed the two, sharing the couch with Simon while the rookie curled up in the large armchair diagonal to them. 
He...well, if Bowie was being honest, Felix looked like hell. He chewed his lower lip like an anxious beaver and fiddled with the loose threads of the closest armrest; everything about him screamed discomfort. Bowie caught Simon’s worried glance in his periphery and let out a slow breath, trying to relieve at least a little of the tension in the room.
“You don’t have to relive it if you don’t want to. I saw the game. But if you want to talk about it…” Simon trailed off with a significant look.
Felix sighed and his shoulders caved in a bit. “It was just one of those moments. All of a sudden, I didn’t really have a grasp on what was going on, which feels like shit because I’ve been doing pretty well so far. I dunno. It was just...bad.” 
That was it. Bowie knew Felix had seemed a little off. When Felix mentioned he had ADHD at the start of the season during one of their ‘getting to know your neighbor’ chats, Bowie hadn’t thought much of it. But as they grew closer, he began to notice when Felix forgot to eat or drink, or got overwhelmingly excited about something, or when he suddenly spaced out. It wasn’t just Felix being Felix.
The whole team stepped up and became intensely protective, of course. They not only helped him remember meal times, but also scheduling, directions, and everything in between. Bowie felt especially responsible for reasons he didn’t entirely understand--there was just something about the kid’s sweet heart that struck a chord.
He also knew that Felix was highly emotionally intelligent, but had no concept of whether people liked him or not. He was someone who assumed the worst, all the time. So, Bowie decided to do the only thing he knew would work: after a few more beats of uncomfortable silence, he pulled his phone out, tapped a few buttons, and pressed ‘call’.
“Hey, Remus, are you alive?” 
An amused snort came from the speaker even as Felix blanched. “Hello to you, too, Bowie. Jeez, you’re worse than Sirius.  I’m one hundred percent alive, just a little swollen. Your rookie’s got a helluva shot, but maybe tell the kid to hit the puck and not my face next time.” 
Felix flushed red and put his face between his knees, though hearing the laughter in Remus’s voice and knowing that he was okay clearly took some of the weight off his shoulders. Bowie whooped internally and shot him a quick, reassuring smile.
“Yeah, the kid’s got spirit, but he’s also got ADHD. He’s great most of the time, but sometimes under extreme pressure he can’t figure out where the fuck he--or anything else around him--is. Something about focusing or neurons firing the wrong way, maybe? Either way, it’s why he’s a terrible fuckin’ driver.”
Felix flopped back against the chair with a groan. “How the hell am I supposed to know how far away the cars around me are based on the mirrors? And how am I supposed to park?!” 
Remus’s laugh echoed once again. “Don’t ask me, kid, I’m not allowed to drive, either. Not because I’m ADHD, but because I’m terrible at it.” 
“You can say that again!” a muffled voice called from behind Remus. 
“Please excuse my fiance,” Remus said politely. “He’s a jackass who’s trying to make me lay down again.”
Felix smiled, though it was a bit pained. “I didn’t get a chance to apologize earlier. That stick was totally on me. And--I mean, I heard some of the guys talking afterward and it sounded like you got pretty banged up, so I’m really sorry. Like, really sorry.”
“Hey, woah, you’re fine,” Remus soothed. Bowie recognized his ‘talking to newbies’ voice and hid a smile in the cuff of his hoodie. “It’s the name of the game, after all. Did Bowie ever tell you about the time I accidentally checked him into a wall? Or when I broke his visor with a puck? For context, this was when we were on the same team.”
“Or that time you kicked my legs out from under me and sent me sprawling across the ice during practice.”
“That one was on purpose.” 
Bowie glared at the phone, but Felix was snickering and his grin was genuine. It calmed him a bit. “Thanks, Loops.”
“No problem, kiddo.” Remus paused for a moment, then mumbled something inaudible to someone in the background before clearing his throat. “Bowie.”
“Yes?” Remus had never been a wild card, per se, but he certainly had a knack for asking strange questions out of the blue.
“Did you accidentally adopt a child or do my ears deceive me?”
Bowie was about to laugh at the absurdity of it, but then he took a moment to think, looking back and forth between Simon and Felix. “Fuckin’--maybe I did, Re, but he’s ours now. And if that’s the case, I’m going to formally request that you tell your fiance to quit being mean to my son.”
Remus laughed on the other end of the line. “Will do. Felix seems like a sweetheart, I’m glad he’s got you two.” 
Bowie nodded with a slight smile, even though Remus couldn’t see him. “So are we. I can practically sense Sirius hovering, so go let your boyfriend fuss over you for a little while.” 
An offended noise came from Remus’s side, followed by a lower laugh and the click of the call ending. 
Simon looked Felix dead in the eyes. “I’m seconding the ‘kid’ thing. You may just barely be a legal adult, but it doesn’t mean we can’t adopt you. Congrats on your new gay dads.” 
Felix’s bright laugh sent a wave of relief through Bowie. “You guys are only, like, eight years older than me.”
“Silence, spawn,” Simon said, pointing a playful finger at him as his grin widened into something sweet and lopsided. “Now both of you need to come eat something. I made cookies while you were getting pushed around for a living.”
Bowie was still worried about Remus’ face--he made a mental note to call the next day to check in--but all his concerns disappeared as Felix scooped the cat up for a snuggle and followed Simon into the kitchen. They may have lost the game, but he would lose a million Cups to keep that moment forever: his Simon fussing over them both, his cat purring in pure bliss, and his kid settling into place at last.
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honeypiehotchner · 3 years
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intelligence & issues (Hotch x Fem!Reader) -- chapter twenty-eight
Hi babes! I forgot to say this last chapter, but I made a playlist for this story! Here’s the link xx. You’re welcome to snoop around my Spotify! I make tons of playlists haha (Here’s the link to the “pov: you’re falling in love with aaron hotchner” one <3)
Chapter title is from “Let’s Get Married” by Bleachers!
Warnings: lots of ~suggestive~ comments (no smut), angst if you squint (i think), loads of fluff
Previous chapter || Fic Masterlist
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Chapter Twenty-Eight: I know it’s hard enough to love me
Aaron doesn’t get done at the BAU until seven. Much later than he wanted, but he had work that he couldn’t abandon. The case still wasn’t closed yet – all the paperwork is done now, but it normally doesn’t take him this long.
He shouldn’t overanalyze his every move, but he can’t help it. He knows he’s walking a thin line, dating a member of his team. A fellow agent, a much younger fellow agent, when he’s a divorced father who doesn’t even have custody of his own son, only visitation.
It’s tearing him apart. But the one thing that puts him back together, is seeing you.
So, that’s what he does.
He didn’t like leaving you this morning. He didn’t want to. But he didn’t expect the psych eval to upset you as much as it did. He truly was only trying to give you a heads up – even though that’s against his rules, too.
He’s breaking all his rules for you. Every last one of them.
And yet, you don’t care.
You open your apartment door to him, and you throw yourself in his arms like you’ve waited all day for him.
“I’m sorry I’m so late,” he says, kicking your door closed with his foot. His arms are around your waist and yours are around his neck, so he’s lifting you off the ground just enough to carry you over to the couch. He’s careful when he shifts your weight as he sits down, so he can swing your legs around gently so you’re sitting in his lap, your arms never having to leave their place around his neck.
“It’s okay,” you say, your voice muffled due to the fact that you’re hiding your face in his neck. “I’m sorry I was so grumpy this morning.”
Aaron sighs, rubbing your back. “You’re forgiven, I promise.”
You lift your head a little to press a kiss to his cheek, your apology in two parts. “My mom and I talked about it.”
“What did she have to say about it?”
You smile softly. “That you look at me the way my grandpa looked at my grandma.”
Aaron hums, curious.
You continue. “She said you looked like you’d bring the moon down to Earth if I asked you.”
He chuckles, pressing a kiss to your lips. “I would.” Another kiss. “I’d need some help.” Another kiss. “But just say the word.”
Another kiss and you’re giggling. “I don’t need the moon, Aaron.”
“No?” He raises an eyebrow. “Or are you too afraid to ask?”
You shake your head. “I’m not.”
He tilts his head, giving you another look. “Little girl…”
“No,” you stop him, pulling him closer, staring into the glass of whiskey that is his eyes. “I don’t need the moon…because I have you.” You pause, watching his eyes, seeing his reaction. “And that’s enough,” you whisper. “I don’t know how to let you love me, but I’m gonna try.”
“Y/N…”
“Mom told me you just love me too much. You’re not trying to upset me, you’re just…trying to make sure I’m okay and that I can do this without killing myself, I guess.”
“She’s right,” he adds softly.
“I know she is,” you chuckle. “She’s right a lot more than I want her to be, but point is, I’m not mad at you. Thank you for the warning about the psych eval. I know you weren’t trying to be a dick by doing it.” He’s not out to get you. You know that now, or you’re trying to.
“Thank you for saying all this,” he says quietly, the one hand that isn’t holding your back coming up to brush your cheek. “I owe you an apology, too. I didn’t do a good job of explaining earlier and I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have sprung that on you right before I had to leave. That wasn’t fair.”
“It really wasn’t,” you laugh, “but thank you.”
He hums, sealing the resolve with another kiss. “Have you eaten dinner?”
You shake your head. “I was waiting for you.”
He sighs, smiling despite his better judgment. “I appreciate that, but it’s late. You didn’t need to wait for me.”
“Well, tough.” You lay your head on his shoulder, biting your cheeks to keep from smiling. You’re more than well aware that that little comment will poke Aaron’s buttons. His hand tightening around your waist is evidence of it.
“What do you want to eat, brat?”
Your breath hitches. Then, as if you want to make it worse, you say, “Do you want me to answer that honestly?”
Aaron sighs again, this time tired and ragged, holding on by a thin thread. “Food, little girl. Food. My cock isn’t food.”
“Well…”
“Y/N.”
“Fine, fine. I don’t know, pizza? Pizza is a safe bet.”
“Pizza it is then,” he says, pulling his phone out of his pocket. While he’s looking up the number of the pizza place, he says nonchalantly, “You know I’m not fucking you until you’re fully recovered. I won’t say it a third time.”
You want to argue because technically sucking him off isn’t him fucking you, but you decide not to. Right now.
Later, you will. He’ll cave eventually. You’re sure of it.
+++
Aaron curves your every attempt to steer things in a more sensual direction. You don’t mind it really, you like teasing him like this – even if you know it’ll come back to bite you in the ass when he decides to punish you for it all. But he insists on not fucking you.
You know you were just shot, but you wish he’d just slam you into the wall already.
Unfortunately, your injured leg doesn’t coordinate with your desire because rough sex – or any sex – is off the table now.
You weren’t going to take any pain medicine for it because it wasn’t hurting that bad, but then it got worse, and you think it’s probably because you did laundry today when you definitely shouldn’t have. You’re not telling Aaron that, though. No way.
Still, he made you take some pain medicine, and now you’re settling into the first Harry Potter movie. He kept his word and you did, too. He needs to watch all of them.
You’re lying down now with your head in his lap – on a pillow, of course, because he doesn’t want you getting any ideas – as the familiar tune of the opening scene plays.
You doze in and out, falling asleep quickly because Aaron’s hands are massaging small circles into your head. You recall him throwing a blanket over you at some point, so you must’ve been shivering.
It’s not long before you’ve fallen asleep completely, waking only after the movie has ended and Aaron has you in his arms bridal style, carrying you to your bed.
“What time is it?” You mumble, turning to bury your face in his shirt, inhaling the familiar smell that is your man.
“Almost eleven,” he whispers back.
You hum, wrapping your arms around his neck. “Are you staying?”
“Of course,” he replies almost instantly. “I stuck a bag in here when we surprised you.”
“You did?” You ask, smiling stupidly. “Cheeky motherfucker.”
He laughs, catching himself and muffling the sound so it doesn’t rattle your eardrums as hard. “Just looking out for my little girl.”
You hum again, pressing a kiss to his collarbone. “Your little girl loves it. And you.”
“And I love her too,” he murmurs. “Can I put you down now?”
Your eyes pop open lazily, seeing you’re in your bedroom. “Have you just been holding me?”
He nods as he lowers you onto the bed. “I felt like holding you.”
You hold onto his neck, and he doesn’t seem to mind as he stays bent over you, his nose brushing against yours. In the dim light, you take him in, searching his brown eyes, trying to find some reasoning, some magic spell that made it possible for him to love you this much.
“You better stop,” you whisper, not knowing where this is going.
“Or what?” He asks, inching closer, his lips ghosting over yours.
“Or I’ll wanna marry you for real,” you mumble. You’re aware of what you’re saying, but the exhaustion from the pain medicine makes it hard to fully process your own words. All you know is you mean them, every syllable.
“I already want to marry you,” he replies quietly. He’s not sure if you’re even coherent right now. You look like you are, but it seems too good to be true.
And as if his thoughts are confirmed, your eyes slip closed, sleep taking over.
You probably won’t remember this in the morning.
But he hopes you will.
+++
When you wake up, Aaron is long gone.
There’s a note next to a glass of water on your nightstand. He’s left for work and is going to try to be back earlier this evening. You smile at the thought, knowing he’ll get caught up again, but you don’t mind. It comes with the job.
You would love to go to the office for lunch. Maybe surprise him this time? You wouldn’t need a ride, as long as you don’t take anymore pain medicine today. The affects from last night’s is already gone.
He might kill you for it, but you’re doing it anyway. You miss everyone.
So, on that note, you get up and eat a quick breakfast before throwing on the comfiest clothes you own. It’ll be weird going into the BAU in these clothes with your badge clipped to the edge of your sweatshirt instead of to a blazer.
And sure enough, it does.
Stepping off the elevator on the floor of the BAU feels more nerve-wracking than it should.
On one hand, you’re excited to be here again, to see the rest of the team and to surprise all of them. On the other hand, you know Aaron won’t be happy with you (at first) for coming here. And you have this strange pit in your stomach, but you’re not sure what that’s about.
You push the negative feelings away and try to stay positive, focusing on the reactions from the rest of the team. They’ll be happy to see you, no doubt. That’s what you should be focusing on.
You’ve barely rounded the corner when you run into Penelope.
She grins, shaking her head. “You’re not supposed to be here, you sneaky little weasel.”
“I know, I know,” you groan. “But I was going insane and I miss you guys! I had to come visit and surprise everyone for lunch.”
“I can order in your favorite,” Penelope winks. “Come, come. Let’s grab JJ.”
Penelope links her arm with yours and the two of you walk to JJ’s office. JJ is at her desk and not on the phone for once, but the stacks of case files are as tall as ever. She looks up when you knock on her doorframe, and her face breaks into a grin.
“Hey you!” She stands, ignoring the open file to give you a hug. “What are you doing here?”
“I came to say hi,” you chuckle, squeezing her tight. “I’m going insane doing nothing.”
“It’s barely been two weeks,” JJ laughs. “What are you gonna do for the other two months?”
“Don’t even tell me that,” you groan. “I don’t know. I’ll just come bug you guys every day off the clock, I guess.”
“And if they’re gone, you can come camp out with me in my lair,” Penelope offers.
“Of course,” you nudge her arm. “I’ll probably hide out with you to avoid the wrath of Hotch.”
“He doesn’t know you’re here?” JJ asks. She grimaces when you nod. “Good luck with that one, sister.”
“Why do you think I want to walk in there with you guys? I’m not going into the lion’s den alone.”
“Oh, you’d be fine,” Penelope laughs. “We’re still having a girl’s night, right? We still need details and you are not getting out of it.”
“Yes, yes, we can, we’ll find time,” you promise.
After another moment of idle conversation, the three of you head up the hall to the bullpen. Through the glass doors, you can see Reid doing another magical science trick, and he must be practicing because Derek and Emily are working on some paperwork instead of watching him.
You decide to surprise Emily first since her desk is closest. Derek spots you, but doesn’t say a word, letting you sneak up behind Emily.
“Did you use my shampoo?” You ask right into her ear (don’t ask why, it’s the first thing that came to mind).
She spins around and jumps up, pulling you into a hug. Derek gives you a hug next, and Reid waves from his desk before going back to whatever experiment he’s in the middle of doing.
“Where’s Hotch?” You ask, glancing between everyone.
“Your man is in his office,” Derek snickers. “What? Did you not get enough lovin’ this morning?”
“Shut it, Morgan,” you try to smack his arm, but he dodges your swing with a laugh. “And since you asked so nicely, I’m never satisfied.”
Your shit-eating grin earns cheering from the girls, but Morgan groans loudly, shuddering.
“I did not need to know that, L/N. Seriously.”
You shrug. “Don’t ask then.”
Morgan shakes his head, wrapping an arm around your shoulders. “I’m glad to see you’re just as feisty as always.”
“That’ll never leave me,” you wrap an arm around his waist, accepting his hug. “Where’s Rossi?”
“He took today off,” Emily answers.
“Something about his publisher,” JJ shrugs.
“Another book?” You ask. “I thought he was done with that.”
“Maybe,” Morgan says. “And I thought you weren’t allowed back here for at least another month.”
“To work,” you clarify, poking his stomach. “I’m just here to bug you guys and have lunch. I’m enjoying my time off, thank you very much.”
“You’re bored, aren’t you?”
“Out of my fucking mind,” you admit with a laugh.
You’re too busy talking to Morgan to realize Hotch has walked out of his office and is standing on the balcony, arms crossed over his chest, and a near death glare settled on you.
“Uh oh,” Morgan mutters, sliding his arm off your shoulders.
Your arm slips from around his waist, your eyebrows furrowing. “What—Oh. Oops.”
“Y/N,” Hotch says firmly. “Can I speak to you in my office?”
“You’re gon’ get it now,” Morgan says under his breath.
But you hear the remark, so you punch him in his side. “Of course, sir,” you say to Hotch, adding another jab to Morgan’s ribs when you hear him snickering at you. You’re gonna get him back later. So bad.
Aaron turns and walks back into his office. He’s closing the blinds when you walk in.
“Shut the door,” he says sternly.
You do as you’re told (for once), shutting the door behind you. “Aaron, I can expl—”
You don’t get to finish your sentence because the wind is knocked out of you, and Aaron lips are smothering your own. He nips at your bottom lip, and you open up for him, moaning when his tongue doesn’t even fight for dominance, just takes. The kiss has you hot all over, thanks to his wandering hands that run under your sweatshirt, leaving goosebumps everywhere his fingertips touch.
When he pulls back, you’re breathless, your chest heaving, your eyes wide, lips bruised.
“Um,” you pause to take a deep breath, licking your buzzing lips. “I’m sorry?”
“We’ll talk about this later,” he says sternly. “You’re lucky they’re out there or I’d bend you over my desk.”
You swallow thickly. “You still can.”
He smirks, but shakes his head, his thumb stroking your cheek softly. “No. And if they ask, you can say we were discussing your psych eval.”
You deflate at its mention. You try not to show it, but Aaron sees it. “When is that, by the way?”
“The Friday after next,” he says quietly. “At noon.”
“Okay,” you murmur. “When are you supposed to formally tell me?”
He chuckles. “Today is fine. I can tell Strauss I called you in to discuss it and you decided to have lunch with the team – if she asks.”
“Are you okay with lying to her this much?”
“Believe it or not, I’ve lied to her more often than you think. Before you joined us.”
“I don’t believe it,” you smirk. “You’re always such a stickler for the rules.”
“And yet here I am,” he pauses, kissing you again, “in love with you.”
“Loving me is dangerous, huh?”
“You have no idea.”
Next chapter
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alphadaddyderek · 3 years
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Dude, just get out! (we both live here dumbass!) (sterek fic, smut, college au)
Stiles was initially excited to go to college. The freedom aspect of it in particular is what Stiles was the most excited about. Don’t get him wrong, he loves his dad, of course, he does. He didn’t mind living with him, he liked seeing him on a daily basis. He’s all Stiles has. Well, Stiles has Scott, but Scott is attending university in Arizona of all places. Meanwhile, Stiles is going to NYU, so, there’s not a lot of opportunities to see Scott or his father in person.
Not to fret though! Stiles was ready like Freddy to meet new people and, hopefully, make new friends along the way. That’s what college is all about. Supposedly, Stiles wouldn’t know but if all the movies are to be believed then that’s what college is all about.
He and his dad spent days driving up to NYU and then spent hours moving Stiles’ belongings into his off-campus apartment and unpacking. Stiles got a full-ride —thank god— so there’s extra money for him to be able to live in an actual, nice apartment instead of the dorms. His roommate was nowhere to be seen at the time, but that was fine with Stiles. He’d have plenty of opportunities to get to know him. Stiles’ dad left to stay in a hotel for the night because there was no way he was starting the trek back to Beacon Hills this late in the day. So, Stiles was left to his own devices in his new apartment.
Well, he was for about twenty minutes, then his roommate came back and...he’s kind of a dick.
He has a resting bitch face and he hardly likes to talk. Stiles doesn’t know if it’s because the guy doesn’t like him or if he’s just the quiet type. He’s starting to think that the guy doesn’t like him because every time Stiles starts talking he looks annoyed. The dick’s name is Derek and coincidentally, he also goes to NYU. He did tell Stiles his major, but wouldn’t tell Stiles what his favorite color was, which is just plain rude.
Anyway, Stiles isn’t going to let this Debbie downer ruin his college experience, no way!
Stiles decides the best thing to do is to just ignore him. Which is hard to do because the guy takes up so much space, like, he’s actually huge. And he always seems to be in the apartment when Stiles comes back from classes. Which is weird because, dude, don’t you have classes to go to? Nonetheless, he’s always there which means Stiles has to see him all the time and Derek can continue being an asswipe for no reason.
For example, Stiles sometimes forgets to wash the dishes —sue him!— and Derek will chew him out for it. Stiles didn’t know Derek was such a neat freak, but now that he knows he’ll leave more things laying around because Stiles can also be a dick when he wants to be. Maybe Derek should learn to be more personable, then Stiles wouldn’t have to go out of his character by doing such petty things. They’ve only been living together for about a week and a half and there’s already a turf battle going on. Stiles isn’t sure who’s going to win this battle, however, the sight of Derek tripping over one of Stiles’ shoes and the subsequent curse that flies out of his mouth makes Stiles not even care in the end.
--------------
After about a month, it's way more than just a battle. The turf battle has evolved into a war and now, no one is safe.
Derek continues being yucky and Stiles continues to do things to intentionally annoy him, except, now Derek is doing things to annoy Stiles. Like, eating all of Stiles’ Pop-Tarts or, and this is a cruel one, flushing the toilet while Stiles is in the shower. Unfortunately for Stiles, Derek buys gross ass healthy food for himself, and Stiles couldn’t choke down that food to save his life. So, what can one do to even the playing field?
Derek is sitting on the couch in the living room, watching some show about underwater caves. Stiles normally wouldn’t stick around because, despite what Derek might think, Stiles really doesn’t enjoy being talked down to by an abnormally grumpy man. This time though, Stiles sits down beside him. He can see Derek watching him from the corner of his eye, probably waiting to see what Stiles is going to do. Stiles likes to instill fear in Derek. Normally he acts like Stiles is nothing more than a bug he wants to squish under his overly expensive boot, but now? He’s worried. He should be. Stiles is going to pull out his ultimate weapon.
“So, whatcha watchin’?” Stiles asks, plastering a smile onto his face.
Derek gives him a suspicious look. “Why do you want to know?”
Stiles shrugs, smile still present. “I’m curious. This show seems interesting.”
Derek gives him an incredulous eyebrow raise, which is super insulting. Derek thinks all Stiles watches is Harry Potter, Star Wars, and superhero movies. Which is just wrong. But that’s okay. Stiles thinks all Derek watches are documentaries about how to be a functioning human in society, which, newsflash Derek, still needs working on.
A few minutes go by before Stiles decides to speak again. “So, you haven’t told me about your family.”
“That’s intentional.”
Stiles laughs. Derek thinks he can scare Stiles into leaving him alone. Unfortunately for Derek, Stiles has zero self-preservation skills.
“Come on Derek. We’re roommates. Don’t you want us to get along?”
Derek didn’t dignify that with a response —rude!— so Stiles speaks again.
“My dad is the sheriff of my hometown. Been that way for as long as I can remember. My best friend, his name is Scott, wants to be a vet. He goes to The University of Arizona. After that he’s not sure where he’ll go to get his DVM but he’s open to anything.”
Derek turns the volume up on the tv and Stiles bites his lip to stifle his laughter.
Ah, Derek. That won’t help.
“At first I was kinda skeptical about Scott becoming a vet. I mean, he’s a puppy himself, and I love him to death, but sometimes he’s ditzy. He’s a ditzy brunette. But after working at Deaton’s, Deaton is the town vet, for years he’s proved me wrong,” Stiles risks a glance at Derek and he’s scowling so hard Stiles is kind of afraid it’ll get stuck that way forever. “He and his girlfriend, Allison, are kind of having issues with long-distance but they’re high school sweethearts so I’m confident that they’ll work through it. They’re so cute together that it’s actually kinda nauseating. Like, sometimes their sappiness makes me sick to my stomach. I wonder when they’ll get ma-”
Derek abruptly stands up and walks out the room, slamming and locking his bedroom door, as if Stiles is the boogeyman who he’s trying to keep out.
Stiles snickers and grabs the remote to change the channel. Derek gets annoyed when Stiles talks, well, he shouldn’t have started this war then (it doesn’t matter that technically Stiles started it). Stiles has weaponized his ability to talk people’s ears off. So, Derek better watch out.
Hopefully, Derek won’t murder Stiles in his sleep.
--------------
Okay, so, Stiles thinks maybe this whole turf war thing is getting out of hand.
It’s been a total of 3 and a half months since they’ve been living together and Derek and Stiles are on edge around each other 24/7. Stiles has to shower around eleven o’clock at night so that Derek won’t burn him alive by flushing the toilet. Derek doesn’t have access to Stiles’ snacks anymore because Stiles hid them in the back of his closet. Derek stays in his room all day just so that Stiles won't have any opportunities to talk to him. They’re at an impasse, but Stiles has a feeling that the worst has yet to come.
A really bad feeling.
Stiles comes back from a particularly grueling day of classes to see Derek sitting on the couch...and he’s smirking.
That doesn’t bode well for Stiles.
“Hello, Stiles.”
“Uh, hey dude. Why do you look like a supervillain?”
“‘Cause I have a surprise for you.”
Yeah, that definitely didn’t sound good.
“Actually, I am a-okay. I really don’t need the surprise. I appreciate it though,” Stiles tries to make his way towards his room but Derek keeps talking.
“I normally don’t snoop through people’s things, it’s really not in my character, but after you left to go out last night, I heard some weird noises coming from your room. I was trying to ignore it at first, but after a while I went to see what it was. I was going to mention it this morning but you woke up before I did and by the time I had woken up you were already in class.”
Stiles had stopped in his tracks but he still hasn’t turned around to face Derek, because if Derek is going where Stiles thinks he’s going, Stiles is going to need to be able to book it into his bedroom as soon as possible.
Derek didn’t seem too perturbed by Stiles’ silence since he continues with his story. “Imagine my surprise when I found out that it was your laptop making that noise. Now, I wasn’t surprised by the fact that porn was playing, but what I was surprised at-”
Oh god.
“-was that the video you were watching was titled ‘bear fucks twink with huge cock’. And now I can’t help but question your hatred towards me.”
Stiles’ face is burning. He’s never been so embarrassed in his life, which is really a great feat because Stiles doesn’t get embarrassed by much. It’s not that Stiles didn’t notice Derek was hot, like, come on now, Derek is gorgeous. He’s not that much taller than Stiles but the size of his biceps? They’re easily the size of Stiles’ thigh. Derek is bigger than Stiles in every aspect.
Well, he’s not sure about every aspect. Stiles has never seen Derek’s dick outright, but he’s seen him wear sweatpants, and ooh boy, that bulge gives Stiles the impression that Derek is hung like a horse.
Stiles still hates Derek because Derek still has his asshole-ish ways. Case in point: right the fuck now. But, you can hate someone and still want to fuck them, right? Hate sex exists.
Derek is patiently waiting for Stiles to respond, and Stiles has never been good at staying silent, so it’s only a matter of time.
Stiles finally turns around to face Derek and clears his throat. “That- that means nothing. People watch shit like that all the time. Plus, you hardly qualify as a bear.”
It’s a weak excuse but, hey, Stiles is grasping at straws here.
Derek tilts his head to the side in agreement. “True, but if that was the case, why do you seem so nervous?”
Stiles can’t think of a reasonable response in time and Derek knows it.
Derek smirks again and Stiles really wants to knee him in the dick.
“Do you wanna fuck me?”
Stiles narrows his eyes at Derek. What the fuck is his endgame here? Why is he being such a dick?
Oh yeah, because Derek is a fucking asshole.
“Fine,” Stiles says through gritted teeth. “I find you attractive. I watch porn about big, hairy men fucking twinks because I want you to fuck me. Are you happy now? Jackass.”
Stiles storms into his room and slams the door. That’s a perfect example of why people can’t be pretty and nice. It’s genetically impossible.
Stiles lets out a sigh and dumps his backpack on his bed before stripping out of his clothes and getting into the shower. He stands under the spray for ten minutes, just praying to the cosmic gods out there that a black hole will appear and suck the whole human race into nothingness. After waiting for a few more minutes, and his prayers going unanswered, he washes himself then gets out to dry off. He wraps the towel around his waist and opens the door to find Derek standing outside his bathroom door. He shrieks (a very manly shriek by the way) and covers his chest with his arms, not that that’ll hide much.
“Derek, what the fuck are you doing?”
Derek’s eyes do the slowest sweep in fucking existence down Stiles’ body and Stiles feels his cheeks flush. Ugh, why are the cutest guys always assholes?
“I came to apologize. I was being a dick-”
“What else is new?” Stiles interrupts. Stiles is rewarded with another smirk.
“-and I took it too far. I’m sorry I embarrassed you.”
Stiles looks at Derek for a second. They’ve never apologized to each other when they did shit, and even though Stiles didn’t take it as far as Derek did, Stiles can’t stand here and act like he wasn’t also an asshole.
Stiles sighs. “I’m sorry too. I was also kind of a dick. Not as much as you, but still.”
Derek laughs a little, and Jesus H. Christ, how is a laugh sexy? “Apology accepted.”
Stiles holds his hand out for a handshake. Derek puts his hand in Stiles’ and they shake on their newfound not-friendship-but-also-maybe-not-complete-dicks-to-each-other-ship.
“So,” Derek starts after they drop their hands. “wanna have sex?”
Stiles might’ve actually choked on his own fucking spit, because what?
“What?”
“I asked if you wanted to have sex.”
“Where is this even coming from? You hate my guts. Every time I talk you look like you’re going in for a root canal.”
Stiles is so confused, he’s also getting hornier by the minute, but right now, the confusion is outweighing the horniness.
“I don’t hate you. Yeah you talk a lot, and it was so annoying at first, sometimes it still is, but I got used to your incessant chatter.”
Stiles knows he looks dumb, his mouth is gaping and everything. “I think maybe there was something in the water because I must be high. We’ve lived together for over 3 months and you’re telling me that you actually want to have sex with me?”
Derek shrugs. “Yeah. Just because you can be kinda annoying that doesn’t mean you’re not cute. Plus, people have sex all the time, that doesn’t mean we have to, like, date or whatever.”
Stiles rolls his eyes. Derek’s so romantic, how has Stiles been able to resist jumping his bones for this long?
“You just embarrassed the hell out of me, why would I ever want to have sex with you?” Never mind the fact that Stiles definitely does want to have sex with him.
“Maybe you don’t. If not, then fine. We can just go back to how things were. If you do, then we’ll have a great time.”
Stiles is still struggling to wrap his mind around all of this. Derek wants to have sex with him? In what universe does that make sense?
Apparently in this one.
Stiles does this sort of shrug that basically portrays well, what the fuck? Okay then. “Okay. I guess this is happening then.”
Derek smirks for like the fiftieth time in thirty seconds and if Stiles was a stronger man he definitely would’ve kneed Derek in the dick, but clearly, Stiles is weak.
Very, very weak.
“My room or yours?” Derek asks.
“Mine. Since it’s right there,” Stiles points behind Derek and, lo and behold, there’s Stiles’ bed.
Grabbing Stiles’ hand in a surprisingly gentle gesture, Derek walks the three feet from the bathroom to the bed to lay Stiles down.
Derek gets on top of the bed and is sitting on his knees by Stiles’ feet. He pulls his shirt off like he’s in Magic Mike or something before throwing it onto the floor without a care in the world. Jesus, it’s like his muscles have muscles. Stiles starts feeling a little insecure about his body. He’s got muscles, but, he’s not, like, ripped like Derek is. Stiles likes to think he has somewhat of a swimmer’s body.
Looming over him like a fucking creeper, Derek stares down at Stiles. “You know, you’re very pretty.”
Stiles refuses to admit that he blushes at that because he’s not pretty. If anything he’s handsome, some may even say gorgeous.
“Can you just get on with it?” Stiles throwing a scowl in Derek’s direction.
“Bossy. I kinda like that,” he strips his sweatpants off and throws them down too. Now he’s only in a pair of gray boxer briefs and, god, Stiles wants to suck his dick so badly. Which is weird because he’s really not all that experienced with blowjobs, he’s given maybe two blowjobs in his life. Whatever, Derek has a great dick okay?
Derek tugs at the towel around Stiles’ waist. “Is this okay?”
Stiles nods and then the towel is gone, and Stiles is laid bare for Derek to gaze at his leisure. And boy does Derek gaze. He does another slow sweep down Stiles’ body, except this time it’s even more intense because now Stiles is naked.
“You’re not a virgin right?” Derek asks while rummaging through Stiles’ bedside drawer and pulling out the lube. First of all, it’s rude to go through people’s stuff! Second of all, how the hell did Derek know his lube was there? Although, where else would lube be?
“Nope. There will be no deflowering of the Stiles today. Sorry to disappoint.”
Derek shrugs before popping open the lube. “I’m not one of those weirdos who pops a boner at the thought of popping someone’s cherry.”
Stiles chuckles, like actually chuckles. Who knew Derek was even capable of being funny?
Stiles pulls his legs up and hooks his hands behind his knees. The position exposes Stiles’ hole to the extreme and it makes Stiles blush. Just because he’s not a virgin doesn’t mean that he doesn’t get nervous or embarrassed during sex.
Derek knee-walks closer to Stiles and squirts some lube onto his fingers. He puts one hand on Stiles’ right thigh while the other one gently and slowly breaches his entrance. Fuck, his fingers are thick. Thicker than Stiles’ that’s for sure. Stiles definitely isn’t shy about fingering. He fingers himself all the time, but it’s been a while since someone else’s fingers were up there. Stiles is nervous and excited about it all.
Derek doesn’t spend too much time with the one finger, quickly adding a second one and that’s when it starts feeling good. Derek’s fingers are about an inch away from his prostate and Stiles is about to curse him out until Derek presses both fingers against his prostate and Stiles has to bite his lip to stop the loud ass moan that almost escaped his mouth. Judging by the look on Derek’s face, he knows he touched Stiles’ prostate, and being the asshole that he is, he has a cocky smile on his face.
After scissoring those two fingers inside Stiles for a few minutes, Derek adds a third finger. The stretch is definitely there, but hey, Stiles likes a little pain with sex. He can be kinky sometimes.
“Okay. I’m ready, come on,” Stiles says. He was starting to get impatient. He just wants to get dicked down already, damn.
Derek gently removes his fingers and gets off the bed to pick up his sweatpants. He reaches into the pocket and retrieves a condom out. Stiles’ mouth drops.
“So you just knew I’d have sex with you?”
“I didn’t know. I just hoped.”
That smarmy little bastard.
Derek gets back in bed and, finally, removes his briefs and...
Holy mother of god.
Well, maybe not the mother of god. That’s blasphemous as fuck. But! The sentiment is the same because wow. Stiles is glad he didn’t knee him in the dick because that dick is too gorgeous to cause serious injury to. He’s not like porn star big, but it is big and long too. And it’s uncut, which Stiles has a weird sort of kink about. He loves uncut cocks. Yeah, that’s a good-looking cock right there.
Derek unwraps the condom and rolls it onto his cock. He then grabs the bottle of lube that he placed on the bed and squirts more out before slathering a generous amount onto said cock. He makes Stiles move his hands before replacing them with one of his own, the other is at the base of his cock, lining it up to Stiles’ hole.
“You ready baby?” Derek asks.
“Call me baby again and I’ll dropkick you in the throa- oh fuck.”
Of course, Derek chose when Stiles was mid-threat to start pushing his cock inside. Geez, that is seriously a big cock, even the fingering didn’t make it burn any less. Derek gently pushes his cock in deeper before pulling it out, then he pushes it in a little deeper than he did at first before pulling it back out again. He repeats that until his cock is seated all the way inside, his balls to Stiles’ ass. Then he stops and waits. There’s sweat gathering above Derek’s eyebrow and some is even rolling down his temple. Needless to say, Derek isn’t as unaffected as he’s trying to be. Which makes Stiles feel kind of great actually.
“Okay, you can move now,” Stiles informs Derek. And when Stiles says Derek goes to town, he really means that.
Derek puts his other hand behind Stiles’ left knee and pulls out all the way, not even the tip is inside, before thrusting back in. Hard.
Stiles’ breath gets forced out of him at the movement. This truly is hate sex, kinda. Derek said he didn’t hate Stiles, but he certainly doesn’t like him all that much. At least, not yet. Who knows what will stem from this. That’s something to think about when Derek isn’t pounding him into the mattress.
Derek delivers a thrust that nails Stiles’ prostate dead on and Stiles makes this super embarrassing sound, like a high-pitched keen. He knows he’s not going to live that down after this.
After that, Derek is consistent with the hard abuse on Stiles’ prostate, and Stiles is getting close to orgasm embarrassingly fast. He isn’t too sure he’ll be able to last much longer. Although, Derek doesn’t seem like he’s going to be able to either. If the grunts and groans he’s letting out are anything to go by.
“Unh, fuck. Derek-!”
“Yeah, you’re gonna come?”
Stiles frantically nods his head and grabs his own cock to start stroking himself. Derek thrusts harder if that’s even possible, and within a few seconds, Stiles is coming all over his stomach.
“Fuck, Stiles,” Derek groans and thrusts one, two, three more times before stopping with a deep, guttural moan. He almost sounds like an actual bear and Stiles can’t help the giggle that escapes him.
Derek gives him a weird look but his lip quirks up in a maybe sort of smile. “What’s so funny?”
“Oh nothing,” Stiles gives him a shit-eating grin.
And since it’s already been established that Derek is an asshole, he grinds and his cock brushes against Stiles’ oversensitive prostate causing Stiles’ whole body to convulse. He slaps Derek’s arm.
Derek pulls out and lets go of Stiles’ legs. They’re sore from being in the same position for so long but Stiles can’t even care. He’s sated and all he wants to do now is take a nap. Stiles stretches his whole body like a cat while Derek disposes of the condom.
“Okay, that was fun. If you want to annoy me, I’ll be in my room.” And with that, Derek walks out of Stiles’ room to go to his own.
Derek was definitely a dick, but Stiles could deal with him. Especially if they continue to fuck like that.
Holy (not) mother of god indeed.
139 notes · View notes
mrkcore · 3 years
Text
𝐆𝐇𝐎𝐒𝐓 𝐎𝐅 𝐘𝐎𝐔 - 𝐧.𝐣𝐦
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𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: na jaemin x f!reader
𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬: jaemin as DC’s nightwing/dick greyson, hero!jaemin
𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: you’re the one picking him up, piece by piece, even when you’re gone.
𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: angst, fluff
𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠(𝐬): profanity, character deaths, blood, gun use
𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 5.3k (woopwoop!)
𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐨: ghost of you - 5sos, lie to me - 5sos, woke up in japan - 5sos, want you back - 5sos, more - 5sos, better man - 5sos, moving along - 5sos, thin white lies - 5sos, red desert - 5sos, lonely heart - 5sos, high - 5sos (just me being 5 seconds of summer trash)
𝐚/𝐧: part of @nct-writers​ collab, the heartbreak hotel (this is probably the longest fic i’m ever going to write, so pls gimmie feedback i will love you forever)
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“imagine you're watching a runaway trolley barreling down the tracks straight towards five workers who you do not know and can't escape. you happen to be standing next to a switch that will divert the trolley onto a second track. here's the problem. that track has a worker on it, too, just one, but they’re not a stranger. what do you do? do you sacrifice that one person to save five?”
jaemin regrets being the hero in the story. 
jaemin regrets everything.
he constantly ponders the situation playing out where he wasn’t the protagonist. people have always said, “a hero would sacrifice you to save the planet, but a villain would sacrifice the planet to save you”. jaemin always thought that was bullshit, but now he knows the despairing truth. 
he regrets, he regrets, he regrets. but regret won’t bring you back.
you seemed so sure when you told him to let you go and it’d be okay, it wasn’t his fault. how was it so easy for you to think and say that? not his fault? he was basically the reason you’re dead. he just found you after so many years, now you’re gone again; but this time, it’s for real, forever.
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jaemin remembers the cold tiny room he was forced to sleep in with the other children in the circus. 
it was a nightmare every single day. with kids screaming, singing, laughing, and running around the room, nobody could get any sleep. what made it worse was that jaemin had no one to talk to. 
none of the other boys liked him, being handsome, dubbed the “face of haly’s circus”, always talking behind your back how the boss always favoured him because he was bringing so many more views in. girls swarming around jaemin ever since him and his parents ever joined, it was so obvious that he was the most popular. jaemin never liked the attention, he was only trying to survive after all.
then, you arrived. 
y/n, the confounding witch, they called you. 
conjuring up little tricks for audience members, brewing up drinks to transform participants into different species of animals, and controlling birds in cages were only a few acts you could do.
the first day boss introduced you to everyone, you seemed so bright and excited to be joining. your unique eye smile, bubbly personality, and caring nature drew jaemin to you. he’s seldomly trying to calm the younger kids down so everyone can rest, but your patience and compassion towards the kids were something they weren’t used to, and eventually caved in.
soon, it became quieter in that god awful room jaemin always dreaded. but jaemin's heart beat louder in his chest than ever.
jaemin was never one to show off. like we established before, the attention jaemin got was not appreciated by him. except, it became different when you arrived.
he was constantly trying to impress you, sway you, hoping the things he did for the crowds of girls that rushed to buy tickets to see him, would work for you too.
however, that was just his wishful thinking.
you were unlike any of the interactions jaemin had with the opposite gender. you were confident, yet humble, witty, intelligent, and easy-going. he is constantly flustered whenever he is engaging in a conversation with you, but tries to act nonchalant whenever he knows you’re nearby.
after shows, girls screamed and bolted towards the entrance where jaemin stood for exit duty, to say goodbye to patrons. he’d always try to be paired with you for it, trying to make you jealous. 
but of course that never happened. jaemin would always be trampled by his enthusiastic female supporters, as surges of them stopped to interact with him. flirting with them all at the same time, they all swooned over your charms. he’d always see you giggle, laughing at his bursts of confidence he’d never have with you by yourselves. 
this continued for a year, until one day, you let something slip.
“ladies, ladies, i’m so glad you could join us for today.” jaemin smiled at the groups in front of him, glancing at you walking an elderly couple out of the tent. “make sure to take good care of yourselves, wouldn’t want anything happening to any of you sweet gals.” and cue the squeals. 
“hope you had fun pretty boy.” you directed to him calmly, as you walked back into the circus. jaemin’s head snapped to stare at your back. he’s stunned, did you just call him a “pretty boy”? 
remembering that the crowd in front of him was still there, he reacted quickly.
“i guess it’s time for me to go, i’ll catch you lovely girls at my next show, i hope.” he leaves with a wink, following your path straight towards you. 
finding you in your little assigned room, jaemin barged in, gaze fixated right on you, not even thinking what to say.
“oh, jaemin, hey.” you say, not even batting an eye, you’re focused on the book in your hands. “what’s up?”
“you called me pretty boy.” he breathed out. 
“yeah i did,” you’re still not paying attention to him. “what about it?”
“you think i’m pretty?” jaemin is suddenly very close to you, his hand caressing your face, lifting your line of sight up to meet his gaze. 
his eyes are sparkling, cheeks a slight tint of pink, with a look of determination. of course you thought he was pretty, anyone who said otherwise would either be lying, or have never seen his gorgeous face.
jaemin must’ve been acting impulsively, because when he realized how close he was to your face, he immediately pulled back.
“i am so sorry,” he says in disbelief. “i don’t know what came over me.”
“it’s okay,” you smile at him, grabbing his hand to where it was before. “i liked it.”
jaemin is flustered again, standing completely frozen as he admires your face up close. 
you’re breathtakingly beautiful. he’s known that you were attractive, but this just created even more butterflies in his stomach. 
“and yes, i do think you’re pretty.” you wink at him.
and that’s where it started.
you and jaemin started spending time together more.
jaemin was still a bit nervous and frenzied at the beginning, but that melted away, and his flirty, outgoing, and annoyingly confident side was revealed to you.
you were also quite popular amongst the other boys in the circus, so when you two were seen more frequently together, they started spreading rumours about jaemin to get you two away from each other.
“oh jaemin’s just trying to use them.”
“jaemin thinks after getting with them, he’s going to cross all of the names off his list.”
“he’s such a player, y’n’s too good for him.”
of course you’d hear them more often than him, the guys would always say these kinds of things around you.
but you know they’re just trying to stir up trouble. so you ignore them. 
just like how jaemin ignores the talk about you amongst his female supporters.
“she’s trying to take him away from us.”
“he’s not as happy anymore.”
“she thinks she’s all that, he’s probably just a new notch in her belt.”
of course jaemin would never listen to them. they’d never know about the secrets you had together, sneaking out of your rooms and sitting on the roof at night stargazing, your note exchanging, late night talks; they knew none of that. 
“i wish things weren’t like this,” you sighed, leaning on his shoulder as you two look at the early sunrise. “i wish we could be free and do whatever we want. this is so unfair.”
jaemin has never really thought about that. every day, his head was flooded with you. but now he thinks about it, it truly was unfair.
jaemin wishes he could take you on on real dates, take you on meaningful trips to explore the rest of the world. not hidden in this awful place where you could barely talk to each other in public. jaemin wishes he could give you more.
“it’s not your fault nana,” you look up at him like you’ve read his mind and know he’s overthinking. “there’s nothing you can do.”
“yeah,” jaemin exhales. “i know.” he tries to smile when you reach up to caress his face, you look at him with so much fondness, jaemin’s worries are almost all blown away. but you know he’s going to be pondering about this for the next week.
“maybe this just how it’s meant to be, our wicked fate.”
but all the gossip got to the point where the boss heard about it, and asked you guys to talk in his office.
“i think we should end it here.” you say one night on the roof, seemingly out of the blue.
“what?” jaemin is speechless, where did that come from? did he hear you wrong?
“he literally asked us to talk,” you’re facing the ground, not even daring to look at him. “it’s serious this time.”
“so you’re going to just throw all of this away?” jaemin asks, slightly furious. “just because of what a bunch of losers are saying?”
“it’s for the best,” you’re still not looking at him. “for the both of us.”
when you finally do look up to see jaemin’s reaction, you see tears in his eyes and you wish you hadn’t looked up.
“fine, if that’s what you want.” jaemin turns around and walks away, breaking that silence.
but what jaemin didn’t know was that it broke your heart to pieces. it took you so much courage to break it off with him, but in the end, you knew what boss haly was capable of. you needed to protect him, so if this is how it needed to go, it’s for the best.
the meeting the next day went smoothly, it was easy for both of you to deny everything since jaemin was giving you the cold shoulder. you didn’t need to pretend. it was for the sake of the both of you.
after the meeting, you didn’t get the chance to talk to jaemin as he rushed to get ready for his special act today. but it’s not like he would listen to you anyways, you couldn’t blame him.
you felt the aura of the circus today, it felt off. very off. 
maybe it was because you were so shaken by you and jaemin's fight. maybe it was nothing, and you were just overreacting. everything was probably fine.
except it wasn’t.  
as all of the spectators settled into their seats, when you tried to peak through the curtain to see the turnout, and as expected, it was packed.
but something catches your eye. a black raven flies in, the ambience in the tent suddenly changes so fast if gives you whiplash. this isn’t good. this isn’t good at all. something bad is going to happen, really bad. 
you’ve never seen that bird in your entire life, and it suddenly hits you.
someone is going to die tonight.
you pray and pray it’s going to be fine, but the unsettling energy gets to you. you need to tell someone.
“jaemin, jaemin!” you call out to him. he turns around, but when he sees you, his face turns sour. your heart sinks, but what you’re about to tell him is more important, so you brush it away.
“what do you want.” he snarls, you gulp back a sob. 
“something bad’s going to happen, i can feel it.” tears are threatening to spill out of you eyes. “someone’s going to die, and i don’t know what to do.”
“oh, so now you care?” jaemin rolls his eyes. “are you jealous that it’s my show tonight and all of those girls front row are here to see me and think they have a chance with me?” you’re shocked by his words, your eyes are wide. you never thought he was capable of saying something like that. “you’re just a little witch, and it’s all just an act. let it go.” tears stream down your face as jaemin huffs and walks away, strutting into the crowd as the ringmaster announces their act: “the flying greysons!”.
and jaemin was wrong. you were right. something awful happened that day.
jaemin watches helplessly as his parents’ high wires snaps and they pummel to their death. 
you were right. and he couldn’t do anything about it.
jaemin runs away that night as he leaves you in that horrible place by yourself, and you never see him again.
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and here jaemin is. 10 years after the incident, a college student by day, leader of a crime fighting superhero team by night.
after the incident of his parents’ death, mr. jung jaehyun finds him on his path. crying, sobbing, and vulnerable. jaehyun takes jaemin in under his wing. providing him shelter, food, and as much support as he could. jaemin slowly realized jaehyun’s second identity: batman. 
jaemin has heard of jaehyun’s street name. but he’d never thought that he’d meet him in real life, and batman would be someone so similar to him. jaehyun saw a reflection of his younger self, the grief of losing your parents, the reality check of the world being a cruel place at a young age, he didn’t want jaemin to spiral in the same way he did. 
so even though jaemin lived a life of normalcy, his past never stopped coming back to haunt him. 
especially you.
jaehyun dug up some information about the circus, and piles and piles of their dark secrets were revealed. so did the truth of jaemin’s parents’ deaths too. how a well-known and feared crime-lord, threatened the circus unless the owner paid extortion money. boss haly refused, and that night someone messed with the equipment for the performance, resulting in the catastrophe. 
you were right all along, and jaemin didn’t listen to you. it was his fault, everything was his fault.
he even left you there by yourself, all alone, and he never got to say goodbye. oh how wishes he could see you one last time, and say all those things he wanted to these years. 
nightmares woke him throughout elementary school, middle school, high school, and even sometimes during his college time.
the same dream over and over, you reaching your hand out for jaemin to grab and save, but he’s too far away. and you fade away. 
inspired by what jaehyun did to help him, jaemin started to do the same. 
with a bunch of lost and uncared for young kids in new york, jaemin took them under his wing like jaehyun did with him.
with help from trusted individuals he met on the street, mark, renjun, jeno, and haechan, they started to take care of chenle and jisung full time. getting them off the street, given proper shelter, food, water, clean clothes, and access to education, this was the start of the dreamies. 
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today was the same as any other.
jaemin’s philosophy and law studies class has just finished up and he’s walking to his favourite cafe to finish up some work.
“jaemin?” he hears a familiar voice behind him. 
he turns around and sees you. you haven’t changed a bit, still as homely and comforting as he can remember.
is he in a dream right now? how is this possible? 
“oh gosh, it really is you.” you laughed, the same laugh you had. jaemin feels this unknown warmth and reassurance with you here, like a weight has just been lifted off his shoulders.
“y/n.” he finally speaks. your eyes glimmer, looking at him affectionately.
“yep, right here in the flesh.” jaemin starts tearing up. “oh you big baby, why are you crying?”
jaemin pulls you in as he hugs your waist.
surprised by his emotional state, you were going to speak up again. but you choose not to. standing there, a bit awkwardly, stroking his soft hair, embracing him.
and you’re back. 
jaemin learns that you recently moved to new york city recently for your journalist job position, and you’re looking for a place to move in to.
he’s quick to offer his place, even though he’s still in college, his apartment is big enough for two people.
“are you sure?” you’re hesitant to accept his suggestion. “i don't want to be a big burden. you’re probably really busy as a student.”
“no, i’m fine.” he responds, enthusiastically. “my schedule is pretty much free since i’m third year now.”
and you accept. saying you’re only going to crash for a while until you found another place.
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cherishing the time you had together, during the day, jaemin went to his lectures while you went to work, but when you got home, you did everything together. to the point where jaemin barely saw the dreamies, his crime-fighting crew.
staying up to watch the stars and sunrise, talking and laughing until your eyes were threatening to close. conversing about literally anything. 
but as time went by, you noticed that jaemin didn’t really want to talk about what happened back at the circus. you understood since he lost his parents that night, but he never asked you about how you left and ended up in new york. but you don’t push it, you understand that it’s a rough patch in both of you guys’ lives. 
“do you have anything that you regret?” you ask one night, you truly were just curious.
“not listening to you that night.” he says, monotone. “and leaving you by yourself at the circus when i ran away.”
“jaemin…” you start, but no words leave your mouth.
“fuck!” jaemin abruptly exclaims, mood crashing, turning furious. “it’s all that bastard haly’s fault.”
you shouldn’t have asked.
“if he didn’t make that fucking circus, everything would have been fine! it’s his fault, all his fault, i’m going to get revenge and kill that son-of-a-bitch one day!” he’s yelling now. “we could have met in normal circumstances, we could’ve gotten married, created a family, enjoyed life like all of these snarky city folk. why?”
you wipe the tears that are rolling down his face as he turns to cry in your chest. 
“i’m sorry i brought this up.” you pat his head as his sobs turn into soft snores, head in your lap. “maybe this just how it’s meant to be, our cruel fate.” 
it’s been a year now. it doesn’t seem like you’re moving out anytime soon, but jaemin’s not complaining. he loves having you here, you’ve become a standard part of his day. 
with jaemin more adapted to your appearance, he has started to become more involved with the dreamies.
helping 10-15 kids each month, the squad has advanced to milestones jaemin never thought it’d be at. he is so thankful to have the group and you there supporting him.
you’ve even discussed marriage. 
“y/n na has a nice ring to it, y’know.” jaemin beams.
“you’re such a softie.” you giggle out, but jaemin knows you like it. 
jaemin knows you want to wait until you have a stable job and when he graduates, but the thought always makes him elated. 
“what song would you play for our first dance at out wedding?” he asked one morning, waking up to the sun shining heavenly on you.
“hmm,” you grin. “best part, daniel caesar, h.e.r.”
“you’re perfect.” jaemin kisses your face as you cuddle into his warm chest.
imagining you in a white dress, walking up to the alter on your wedding day, saying your vows, slow dancing. you’re the only person jaemin has visioned a future with, and the only person jaemin wants a future with. 
the next day, you agree to slow dance with him in the living room.
jaemin is on cloud nine.
but like the old saying, all good things must come to an end. 
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it’s been 5 years now.
jaemin comes home one night to the apartment door open, which is really unusual.
jaemin thinks it might be a robbery, but nothing is stolen, the apartment looked the same as it was when he left this morning.
but you’re nowhere to be found. jaemin isn’t panicked, maybe you went on a walk and forgot to close the door–
there’s a note on the dining room table.
“meet me on the top of the empire state building to see y/n, if you bring someone else, it’ll be for the last time.”
what is that supposed to mean?
was it one of the dreamies’ past enemies trying to get back at them? 
nonetheless, jaemin is bolting out the door.
when he gets there, he sees the dreamies tied up, sitting and struggling at the feet of someone jaemin never thought he’d see ever again. c.c. haly, the owner of haly’s circus jaemin escaped a whole decade ago.
haly smirks as he sees jaemin approaching, but jaemin is scowling. 
“what are you doing here?” jaemin snaps out, carefully advancing.
“i’m here to finish what you started.” haly says.
“how did you even find me?” jaemin snarls, stopping a fair distance between him and haly. “how did you find my friends?”
unexpectedly, haly starts to cackle loudly at his questions. turning around to reveal someone who has been absent, someone jaemin would never have thought of.
you. 
jaemin’s mind is internally crashing. why are you with haly? what is going on?
“y/n, do you want to explain to our dear jaemin here what’s going on?” haly finds so much amusement playing with you both, watching this event unfold.
“jaemin, i’m so sorry.” your lips are trembling, tears are starting to flood your vision.
“so it was all a lie?” jaemin can’t believe it. “everything that happened this year, it was just you building up to just stab me in the back?”
“i did it to protect you.” you’re sobbing hard now.
“save it.” jaemin cuts you off, now focusing on haly. “what do you want.”
“i want you dead.” haly says, blankly. 
“so what’s the deal.” the dreamies’ mouths were duct taped, but their muffled cries can still be heard.
haly is howling again.
“i get to kill you,” haly grins sinisterly. “and i let y/n and your little friends free.”
“if jaemin says yes, let me say one last thing to him.” your crying has stopped. “it’s the least you can do.”
jaemin is confused. are you just offering him up to haly with no fight? what are you thinking?
you look at him with pleading eyes, asking him to trust you. 
the same eyes he saw that day his parents died, and he knows to trust you.
“okay,” jaemin states boldly. “i say yes. now let y/n talk to me.”
haly is stunned. how did you convince jaemin to agree so quick? maybe haly was right to use you this time. the least he could do is to let jaemin and you have time to still pretend to be in love. so haly allows you to walk up to jaemin to talk.
“y/n, what are you doing.” jaemin whispers frantically.
“trust me, trust me this time.” you glance at him with weary eyes. “when i’m walking back to haly, when i signal to you, i want you to grab your friends and run. can you do that for me?” 
“what?” jaemin tries not to react to much that haly catches on, but do you hear what you’re suggesting? “you want me to just leave you here again?”
“jaemin listen to me, i’ll be fine. trust me.”
and you turn around, not letting jaemin respond.
there’s nothing he can do but go along with your plan.
and when you signal to him behind your back, jaemin grabs the dreamies and drags them away. everything is a whirlwind and happens in a flash. jaemin looks back and you’re struggling trying to get the gun out of haly’s hand. 
you notice jaemin stopping.
“jaemin, fucking RUN.” you scream at him.
there’s nothing he can do. and he hates himself that he got himself in this situation again. so he runs again, like the coward he is.
jaemin runs, because literally the dreamies’ lives are depending on him. when he gets them to safety, when he unties jeno, jeno pushes him towards where they came from.
“go.” jeno is huffing trying to catch his breath after removing the duct tape off his mouth. “i’ll untie everyone else, go get her.”
jaemin looks at jeno, and turns back for you.
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when jaemin arrives back at the scene, you’re on the ground. he runs panic-stricken to you, finding you bleeding out really hard. 
“y/n? y/n, y/n please, are you okay?” he’s shaking you, distraught seeing you in this state.
“jaemin, i’m okay.” you say, barely any breath left in you. “i have the gun here, haly is behind the big box over there.”
“y/n, what are you talking about, we need to get you to the hospital.” jaemin tries to pick you up but you don’t allow him.
“use the gun and kill him.” you mutter out, quieter than before. “it’s what you wanted, jaemin. and he’ll be gone.” you’re smiling softly just thinking about it.
“y/n, are you insane? you’re going to die i could care less about haly, i’m taking you to the hospital–”
“jaemin let me go.” you mumble, stroking his cheek while you’re examining his pretty face for the last time. “it’ll be okay, it’s not your fault.”
“y/n…” jaemin’s tears are staining his shirt as he holds you tightly, trying to preserve your life.
“i love you, na jaemin.” a tear falls from your dazed gaze and trickles down your cold face. “i’m sorry that this is how it’s meant to be, our cruel fate.”
and you’re gone. 
jaemin screams. tears dripping down his face, he picks up the gun beside you and storms towards haly.
he’s basically sitting in a pool of his own blood and has no strength to get up anymore.
“is little greyson here to get revenge for his parents and little witch y/n?” he cackles even in the last moments of his life.
“yeah i am, they didn’t die for you to see another day too.”
haly is laughing sadistically again as if jaemin just told a joke, but the laughter subsides after the bullets fire through haly’s limp body. 
and he’s dead too. leaving jaemin alone, again. 
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it’s been 2 years since you’ve died.
here he is, waking up. still can’t sleep on your side.
he really can’t sleep on your side, because it reminds him of those times where he woke up to your warm embrace, and now it’s desolately cold.
there’s your coffee cup, the lipstick stain fades with time.
he’s saved everything you had, and hasn’t touched anything. he’s also saved everything you shared, your bed, your apartment, everything. he needs those to remind him of those bittersweet memories of you.
when jaemin was going through your stuff, he finds a piece of paper on your work desk.
my dear jaemin,
when you find this, i’m probably going to be gone. but that’s okay, and i’ll tell you why.
first of all, thank you so much for these past 5 years. thank you for showing me what living life is like, what being a part of a family is like, and what being in love is like. you told me you wished you could give me a normal life, and you really fulfilled your wish. 
you must have so many questions right now, so i’m going to answer them.
i never left haly’s after you ran away. i couldn’t. because he was threatened by so many mobs and gangs everywhere, he had to kill off the other people that were a part of the circus. but he kept me. because i was the key to you. the government started an investigation into him, and he needed to keep a low-profile, but he still was angry that you didn’t die that night too. so he plotted this for years, and i just had to go along with it.
at first, i only agreed because i wanted to see you. i was young and still naive at the time, thinking that he wanted to see you too. but as i got older, i saw what he was planning. he would kill me in front of you and then take you out as well if i didn’t do as he said, so i kept quiet. i really did this to protect you.
i enjoyed every second being with you. you showed me the meaning of life i heard our patrons talk about. you showed me what true love was when i saw those elderly couples walking together as they look at each other adoringly while telling me they’ve been in love and married for decades. if i could choose to stay with you for a lifetime, i would, i would choose it a million times.
but i thought very long about this, and it truly is the only way.
remember when i asked you if you regretted anything that night? you mentioned how you regretted not listening to me, how you left me alone at the circus. and that’s when i realized, it was indeed our cruel fate.
you feel bad for me. you feel bad that you didn’t listen, you feel bad for leaving me at the circus, but it’s been over a decade. i know with me constantly here, you’re never going to stop feeling guilty, you’d never let the past go. we’re too young, too dumb, to know things like love. but i know better now. 
so jaemin, i did what i had to do. the best for the both of us. you got your revenge for your parents, and you’ll stop feeling guilty because i don’t want to hold you back and keep you feeling like this forever. 
i’m sorry jaemin i put you through all of this, and reminder that this is not your fault.
my love, nana, truly, truly, truly, thank you for everything. everything, everything, everything. 
there wasn’t a single day where i stopped wanting you. i want you in the most innocent form, i want to say goodnight to you and give you forehead kisses and say i love you when you feel at your worst. i want you in ways where i just want to be next to you and nothing more or less. i wish i could explain your eyes, oh how i adore your angel eyes, and how the sound of your voice gives me butterflies. how your smile makes my heart skip a beat and how every time i’m with you, i feel so complete. i swear when our lips touched, i could taste the remaining years of my life. i want you to know that when i picture myself happy, it’s with you.
i’ve looked at you in millions of ways, and i have loved you in every way.
but this is how it’s meant to be, our cruel fate.
my pretty boy, i love you forever.
his tears are ruining the page, and jaemin tries to wipe his tears away to save the letter.
when he turns around, he swears he can see you. and he chases it down, with a shot of truth.
maybe if he dreams long enough, you’d tell him he’d be just fine.
walking into the living room, remembering how you guys would slow dance like it was your wedding. your wedding. 
and he drowns it out, like he always does. dancing through your house, with a shot of truth, that his feet don’t dance, like the way they did with you.
jaemin knows your letter was right, he’s going to slowly get better, but he needs some time. meanwhile, he needs something help him cope, to get him by. 
so he’s dancing through your house, with the ghost of you.
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©mrkcore, 2021.
154 notes · View notes
gisachi · 3 years
Note
Hi ^^ I know that your requests are now closed but I was thinking that, given you have written jealous Shinichi, I would very much enjoy some jealous Ran! Maybe you can mix it with one of the prompts? Just throwing the idea out there, no pressure. Delete this if you don't feel like it, it's okay really. Thank you for writing these amazing fics, the shinran fandom is in your debt. ❤️
So this is the last (!!!) and longest (!!!) of the kiss prompts, and I dedicate it to multiple-requests Anon and to this Anon. I hope both of you still see this. It took me a while. ^^;;
P.S. Special thanks to @artycreaty for keeping this in check. You are awesome. 🥰
41. Kisses shared under an umbrella. 46. A lingering kiss before a long trip apart. (6,489 words)
.
.
.
Ran keeps telling herself she has no right to be jealous.
She has hundreds of reasons not to. They’re merely childhood best friends. Life would be much easier if she didn’t involve herself in his business twenty-four seven. Shinichi absolutely doesn’t look at her that way. And so forth.
She wonders why they’re even friends in the first place. If their parents hadn’t enrolled them in the same kindergarten, she was certain they wouldn’t even be on speaking terms. He lives in a world of grisly books and crimes, she in a world of martial and visual arts. Their hobbies don’t overlap. They excel in different fields. They enter the same university with completely unrelated majors. The only bond they have in common is their shared history. Literally bonded since they were four, until now at nineteen.
So when she sees him all jolly around his newfound circle who hold the same interest in Holmes or detective work, it shouldn’t surprise her as much. It’s part of university life, it’s normal, they expand their horizons, and Ran understands that it hits much differently when they bond with people who like the same stuff they do. Something she’s aware they cannot share a hundred percent.
She’s proud of him, and she absolutely has no right to feel jealous, especially when she sees him around taller, prettier, more interesting women from his course block. There is no reason for her to look away with a heavy weight in her chest everytime the women get giggly and touchy while he’s absorbed in narrating his stories.
Everytime she does, she reminds herself of how he didn’t seem to mind when she was casted as the protagonist of their high school play and the leading man was the handsome Araide-sensei. Or how he simply shrugged when she fawned over the brother of a classmate because he looked so much like the karate senpai she was crushing on. Or when she secretly caught Sonoko dragging the detective behind gym after P.E. to confront him about his opinion regarding an upperclassman courting Ran and his only response was, ‘She can like whoever she likes, Sonoko. I’m not her boyfriend.’
He never showed her any sign of jealousy, therefore he must not be into her. Simple as that. So it’s unfair for her to be treating him differently. Getting snarky just because he received sixteen new fan mails again, more now that they’re in uni, and two even coming from the popular criminology seniors he is often teased to? Or ignoring him unprecedentedly just because his eyes followed the back of a woman with long chestnut hair and voluptuous curves? There are plenty of fish in the sea, and he’s bound to be attracted to someone else. This is a pill she ought to learn to swallow eventually.
Eventually.
“Shinichi-kun, you never told us about your scariest case yet, tell us about it?”
Kaori closes her notes and so do the other two girls across her, and Shinichi’s eyes twinkle. He truly seems to enjoy study sessions with the little group they made consisting of some of his and Ran’s coursemates because they love listening to his stories.
“At the top of my head is this murderer disguised as a bandaged man, and he targeted us one by one…” and so the detective drones. Ran pauses typing and reminisces quietly. Ah, that one from summer three years ago. I was almost injured by that crazy man during my sleep but Shinichi woke me up in time.
“Ran-san,” Shun, her friend and coursemate, mutters beside her, also stopping his typing to listen to the detective’s story. “It’s ridiculous how popular Kudou-kun is with the girls. He’s full of wild adventures.”
“Yes, he is,” Ran says, smiling. “He’s been a girl magnet ever since high school.”
She watches as Kaori inches closer to Shinichi, listening attentively, chin on her palm and flirtatious smile on her lips as the detective rants on and on.
For the third time that afternoon, Ran looks away.
.
.
Ran keeps telling herself she has no right to be jealous.
She does, everyday, but it’s hard when he smiles at her, cares for her, holds her in a way she’s never seen him do for anyone else. It gives her hope every time the girls cling to him but he never touches them back, whereas he automatically slings his arm over her shoulder because she’s afraid or cold or he simply feels like it.
Then again, maybe she’s giving herself too much credit. Perhaps it’s a free pass for being around him for too long. She even gets to spend time with him during weekends and holidays. It isn’t special because it’s normal.
And that’s all she’ll ever be, a normal girl in his eyes.
“Ran? She’s pretty special.”
Ran reacts to the mention of her name and catches Shinichi looking at her. “She appears quiet but she can kick anyone’s ass without breaking a sweat. It’s bad if you cross her,” Shinichi gloats with a grin.
“Oh my god, really? We can bring her with us then!” Kaori claps her hands in excitement.
“Ah... But she won’t like that,” he follows up, wary. Ran has missed the topic they were talking about and now she’s curious.
“But ghosts aren’t real and Mouri-san can give them a good beating!”
“Gh-Ghosts?” The color in her cheeks drains, eyes freezing at Shinichi who has probably already expected that reaction, for he sports that same look of concern as those times he had expressed whenever she joined him in his way-past-bedtime elementary school adventures.
“We’ll investigate an abandoned house I always pass by walking home,” Kaori explains. “Last night I saw a faint cigarette light at the second floor window. It might be a fugitive or a homeless person or a ghost, who knows?”
“You don’t need to come if you don’t want to, Ran,” Shinichi assures.
Gulping, Ran contemplates whether going with them will do her any good. It’s a nice change, it’s been a while since she last tagged with Shinichi in his cases. But she isn’t exactly proud of shrieking like a little kid in front of serious criminology majors who may feel like she’ll drag their covert investigation down if she joins.
“...I’ll pass,” she answers meekly, and his coursemates sulk except Shinichi, who offers her a smile of understanding.
“Man, I thought we’ll be able to see Mouri-san in action!”
“That’s ok, maybe next time. We still have Shinichi-kun!”
“Shinichi-kun will protect us, ne?”
“Hah. Right. Invite Hakuba too, use him.”
“Oh c’mooon, Shinichi-kun!”
Ran closes her eyes, struggling to zone their voices out.
In her silence, Ran ponders if she has made a wrong choice.
.
.
Ran has no right to be jealous. So it’s unfair for her to be treating him this way.
The following weekend, Shinichi narrates what happened in their late-night investigation. Hakuba wasn’t there so Shinichi was the only available guy as usual. Ran refuses to hear any more details, both of the haunted house and secretly of the girls chancing onto him during the investigation. Shinichi is puzzled.
“Did I do something wrong?”
“Nah, just swamped with work.”
“On a Sunday?”
“Yes.”
“Want me to assist?”
“No.”
Her replies are curt from the couch of his house, not looking at Shinichi on the other end as she mindlessly cleans up her digital sketches. She hates how snappy she sounds but her brain is too absorbed with conjuring spiteful imaginations to even think of masking her annoyance.
“Ran, hey. Look at me.”
His low voice freezes her from drawing, and she slowly looks up to meet Shinichi’s serious eyes.
When this happens, she knows he’s reading her. She inwardly chants a prayer because now isn’t a good time. Whatever time isn’t a good time. She doesn’t know what to say when she’s aware everything she’s been feeling is irrational and unfair. She’s being selfish.
“You’re… stressed.”
“No, I’m… Eh?”
He scoots closer, an arm’s length away. “Your dark circles are more prominent now, you need a break.” His eyes turn a soft blue. “Let’s have dinner out? My treat.”
Ran is surprised, to say the least. The last time he invited her out was two weeks ago. She’s become so used to seeing him around others that any initiative from him sounds too good to be true.
“But I need to finish this project by tonight.”
“Let’s have food delivery then!” Shinichi announces, not rattled by Ran’s indirect refusal. “I know exactly what you want. Ramen and shaved ice.”
Her eyes thin at the absurdly goofy expression she knows he makes when he’s being mischievous. “Clearly you’re ordering that ramen for yourself. I only like shaved ice.”
“Damn! Miss Detective gets it.” A mile-wide grin stretches across his face, earning an eye roll from the half-smiling woman. “Let’s eat together on your short break, please?”
He leans within a respectful distance and she sees his smile better, pair of kind eyes locking with her overworked ones. “It’s been a while.”
Her heart throbs for him. So much.
She caves - of course she does - and breathes her acquiescence.
After two long weeks, they have dinner together, just them and Shinichi’s ramen and Ran’s donburi and shaved ice, Shinichi taking a spoonful of dessert from the cup when she isn’t looking and Ran snatching a slurp from his take-out bowl and laughing when he catches her.
With how heartfelt his laughter is in her presence devoid of any mysteries, Ran knows she’s probably giving herself too much credit, but for once she wants to believe she is the cause of why Shinichi’s happy.
Just for that night, she gives it to herself.
She’ll change the dark colors of her digital artwork to brighter ones after they eat.
.
.
Despite everything, Ran finds it difficult to contain her recurring jealousy.
The more she shares precious time with him, the more it gets harder to suppress the selfish emotions. What is so unsatisfying about being the best friend is that she is only the best friend. No more no less. At the end of the day, she isn’t the one he gets to cuddle with, to tease then kiss, to tell ‘I love you’ to, romantically.
“I love you.”
Ran feels her heart about to leap out of her chest.
“But please. Stop. Tearing. The. Cushions!”
The little furball he has scooped underneath a throw pillow wiggle from his grasp. The kitten and detective engage in a brief staring showdown before it jumps away to hide under a farther couch.
Snapping out of reverie, Ran watches her childhood friend slink dejectedly onto the partly scratched furniture. He’s fortunate enough that his mother isn’t around to give him a long lecture on Why Pets Aren’t Allowed in the House 101. She can always take Yukiko-san’s role and reprimand him for it, but as for this and the cat, she finds herself not wanting to intervene.
“Kaori-san sure is taking her time with her parent’s permission. By the time she does, Momo would’ve shredded all the pillows in this house.”
“You named the cat?” Ran asks, amused.
“She did.” He thinks for a moment, then sniggers. “Actually I did. I suggested a random name. She took it.”
Ran merely hums. What can she say? They’re getting close. Close enough to team up as parents to an adopted kitten.
“I’m surprised you also agreed to keep Momo when you never took in animals before.”
“Kaori said she’ll treat me to the latest Detective Samonji movie this weekend if I do. Can’t resist that.”
“Just you two?���
“Yeah.”
A beat. Then he turns to her.
“Wanna join? I can ask her to count you in since you’re kinda helpi—”
“N-no need,” Ran quips, “It’s—It’s fine.”
“No really,” Shinichi insists, “Kaori-san has a lot of money, she—”
“I’m going to Tokyo Metropolitan Art Museum with Shun-san this weekend... so... I can’t.”
“Ah.”
Silence.
“It’s, um, for a project,” she bolsters.
“I know.” The faintest smile graces his lips. “It’s your thing. Both of you.”
“Mm.”
He doesn’t say anything else after that.
“Shinichi, you’re a detective, right?” she blurts out of the blue.
“Yeah...and?”
Then deduce what I feel. Here and now.
“Then you’re going to enjoy that movie!” Ran forces a beam, giving Shinichi a thumb of approval. “And you can discuss it with Kaori-san over dinner. I’m sure you two have a lot to say about it.”
Shinichi’s eyes linger on her, reading her like a book, and Ran has her mind reeling again, afraid to be read.
“Yeah, we do,” he finally says, ending the conversation.
Only a few words are uttered the rest of the afternoon.
Momo resurfaces and curls beside Shinichi.
Momo’s purring is loud, but Ran’s shattering heart is louder.
.
.
Ran must not feel jealous. She is not a girlfriend.
Because she isn’t a girlfriend, he’s free to fall for and date anyone else. Who is she to gatekeep him? There are plenty of fish in the sea, and he’s one big catch. Ran believes she’s a big catch, too. With the way she loves dearly, her future boyfriend is going to be very lucky.
Her future boyfriend is not going to be him.
“...mber the required fieldwork in one of my majors I told you? We actually go by batches. The first batch did theirs last month. The second batch was last week… and I— Ran, are you listening?”
“Ah! Yes,” Ran notices they have already reached her station and are now walking two blocks to her apartment. “Your fieldwork, right?”
“...Yeah,” he carries on. “I’m in the last batch... This whole winter break.”
“I see, I understand.” She smiles, getting what he means. No Christmas or New Year’s Eve together. The first time since they’re four. It’s fine, honestly. If it’s a required activity, then there’s really no way to go about it. She isn’t going to lash out just because she can’t be with him in her most favorite time of the year.
“And Hattori-kun and Hakuba-kun will be with you?”
“Hattori did his last month. Hakuba is in the previous batch. I’ll be stuck with the girls.”
Ran’s heart momentarily squeezes. “Where will your fieldwork be?”
“In Akita.”
Her pupils constrict. “That far?”
“Yes... so to cut on expenses, Kaori-san offered her house for me and the others to stay while we’re there—”
Kaori. Again with the tall, beautiful, intelligent Kaori. She bets it’s amazing to spend the holidays doing what he loves and with Kaori beside her, snuggling with him by the fireplace in a romantic snowy night and she might even confess, and it’ll be a great catch for Shinichi, and he’ll return with a girlfriend, and—
“Kaori-san is lucky.” The words flow out of her mouth, unbridled.
Shinichi looks at her. “Lucky?”
Ran remains quiet and keeps walking. It’s dangerous to say anything. She only has one thing in her mind and she doesn’t want to say it out loud. She has no right.
“Ran, hey.”
She doesn’t stop walking.
“Ran.”
She ignores his call.
“Ran… you’re jealous.”
She stops walking.
“Excuse me?”
“...You’re jealous…” Shinichi repeats quietly.
A contrast to his calm tone, his irises beset hers in the cold twilight and Ran attempts to shield herself but her bag and umbrella are in the way. She thinks of turning away but her feet are frigid like icicles, and Shinichi steps closer.
For the third time, he declares, “You’re jealous.”
Hearing her thoughts echo through his words renders her speechless.
It seems to take a moment before Shinichi’s brow arches, lips curl up as his eyes refuse to stray, and she hears a faint exhale even, like he’s exasperated, and suddenly he’s smiling - or is he smirking? sneering? - and...and...
It stings, is her immediate reaction.
For the longest time, she’d wanted him to take a hint. But if she had known this was how he’d react, she’d rather live a life having him oblivious of her emotional struggle. Dealing with that is more tolerable than witnessing him gaze her down in blatant mockery. He sneers as though he’s about to crack a joke and move on and forget such a laughable matter. That’s the last form of acknowledgment she wants for her honest feelings.
Heartbreak and shame and pain build up in her chest like a volcano closing eruption. Water begins to cloud her vision. She clenches her fist tight on her umbrella and Shinichi notices, and he takes another step forward.
“Ran…?”
“I am not, and you’re a fool.”
In a span of a breath, she’s sprinting in the opposite direction, tracing the path where they have walked, ignoring the distant yells of her name behind her. She runs and runs, and as she runs farther, with her thoughts muddy and breath short and dry, she wonders if she may have overreacted.
If he’s done that on purpose, screw him. If not, screw her.
After all, they are merely friends and she has no logical reason to act this way.
“Stop... running... will you!”
She hears heavy footsteps close in. It takes all the energy Ran has to prevent herself from turning her body around but his strong grip overpowers her.
“Let me go!”
“Why are you running?!”
“I can’t...deal with you!”
“Why? Was I right?”
“Right or wrong, it doesn’t matter!”
“Why doesn’t it matter?”
“Because I am your best friend!”
On another occasion, she would’ve successfully jilted away and run farther, but Ran is floored when he yanks her into a one-armed hug, so floored she drops her umbrella to the snowy ground.
“Stop saying that!” he hisses in her ear, frustration apparent.
“What are you— Let me go!”
He hugs her tighter.
“If you don’t let go in three seconds, I will screa—”
“I am happy!”
Ran stops struggling, eyes widening in shock.
Icy huffs tickle her neck as he half shouts, “I’m happy you feel that way!”
“You’re...You’re happy because I’m suffering?”
“What? No! I—”
“Is that supposed to make me feel better? How?” The hurt in her tone is impeccable, prattling muffled against his chest as she spares him no moment to butt in. “You think I wanted to feel this? That I enjoy griping in helpless jealousy? And you’re rejoicing that I am? How full of yourself can you be?!”
“That’s not...You don’t underst—”
“I do understand! I understand that I am so incredibly stupid for catching this disgusting heap of emotions for an obnoxious, stuck-up deduction maniac that is my best friend and maybe it’s better after all that he never, ever sees me the way I see him!”
“Stop saying that, Ran!”
She thinks he has broken away, but he drags her back with an insistent tug, crashing his lips onto hers as she stumbles into his arms.
All willpower rippling through her disintegrates quickly like snow in high heat.
An impatient pop resonates as he separates, eyes slowly opening, breath thick and ragged.
“I know that is not how we explain things, but does that explain anything?”
She hears it. The madness. But more than madness, yearning bleeds through his voice so much that her frustration turns into physical pain. Blinded by an all-consuming ache, she tips her chin and presses her lips back against his, demanding for cure in the wrong place. Shinichi freezes, then relaxes. He moves his hand to her nape, four fingers in her hair, thumb treading her jaw.
They look like a scene in a movie.
Under his umbrella and hidden from view, they communicate through brushing lips and tilting heads. His mouth closing over hers with gentle force, her hands splaying across his chest, heavy with something that makes his heart pound under them.
She is so lost in the chase and his tender embrace that for a second she forgets she is kissing her best friend.
Best friend.
This doesn’t explain anything. It worsens it.
She pulls back, ending what she has so recklessly started. “N-no, I’m— No.”
She pushes him away, gathers the stuff she drops, and runs without looking back.
“Ran!”
He shouts her name. Twice.
On the third call, his footfalls die down. On the fourth, he stops running.
She doesn’t.
.
.
Thirty minutes before midnight, Ran stands outside his gate, boots buried half foot under the snow as she rings his intercom for the second time, thinking to herself how foolish she must be to cut communications with him for a week and then show up his doorstep looking miserable like a stood-up date.
It’s the start of winter break.
He’ll leave for Akita in ten hours.
She needs to give his Christmas present before his departure.
She’s crazy, pathetic, still frustrated, and hurtfully in love.
“Oi. You better have a good explanation for why you’re buzzing at goddamn midnig—”
“Shinichi.”
His surprised gasp is apparent even through the intercom. A rustle follows and with a croaky voice, he responds. “...Ran.”
Surely he isn’t expecting this. Not after the tantrum she threw days ago. He probably thinks she hates him more than ever. But what she truly feels is more overwhelming than all negative emotions combined, and may god grant her all the strength to address it all, tonight.
“May I come in?”
“The house is—The house is a mess I, um. I’m packing my stuff for...”
“I’ll help you.”
“...”
She’ll understand if he decides to turn her down. But the answer that follows the deafening pause is a low and quiet ‘Okay’.
Despite psyching herself hours before she came, courage wanes when he opens the front door and gate in his pullovers. She is welcomed in, and the trip up his room is wordless. Shinichi only talks when he points out that he’s already packed clothes for two days and will need help for two weeks’ worth. He lamely laughs when he instructs her to pick the tops and layers, and he’ll take care of the pants and underwear.
On a normal instance, she would’ve humored him and they would’ve been talking right after. Now she simply pulls an empty smile and then they fall back into silence.
She supposes he’s trying to act unbothered, to treat what happened a week ago as a one-and-done glitch in their friendship, never to be discussed again. She cannot fault him when she’s trying to do the same. But it’s not easy when in the stillness of the night the echo of their altercation howls, raging persistently in their ears.
What has he been thinking of for the past week?
Has he been kept up all night by the words she said and the words he left unspoken?
Are they still friends? Will they still be friends after this?
The kiss... What about the kiss?
So many questions. So little words. So little time.
Ran is seated on the floor, folding shirts and stuffing them neatly in his duffel bag. Her back faces Shinichi who is sorting out bottoms in his cabinet. She senses him sit on the floor, back against her but not touching. Neither dares to speak first.
A ringing phone cuts the silence.
“Mm, still awake. Good for two weeks right? Gotcha. No, I’ll meet you girls at the station, no need to fetch me. Pfft. I can walk. Ok, see you tomorrow.”
If Ran wasn’t so hyperaware of where she is and what she’s done, her mood would’ve shifted to the one she’d been trying to avoid. Now isn’t the time to think about that. Midnight sneaking out to go to his house is something she wouldn’t do even on good days. She scans her bag on the far couch, deliberately bringing a bigger one to hide his gift. Maybe she can just sneak it in his bag and leave once she’s done and he’ll discover it only when he’s prefectures away. Brown has always suited him, and he’ll definitely find the overcoat useful as spare protective gear.
That’s right. She always cares for him like this. She is his best friend first, and... and nothing second.
“Don’t just leave after putting your present in my bag. At this hour, I can’t let you walk home alone,” he says swiftly.
Ran’s eyes fly wide.
“How did you…”
He doesn’t say anything and continues with his business.
Again with the throat-drying silence.
Something in Ran’s gut compels her to speak, but she is surprised when he does first.
“I... I don’t like Kaori-san. If that’s what you’re thinking.”
Ran stiffens, pausing mid-motion from folding. “I’m not…”
He leans his back completely against her and she shudders, voice reverberating through her skin. “Ran, if you could just hear me out.”
Unable to talk and move, she does.
“Kaori-san and the rest... They know I love mysteries. They know I want to build my own private detective agency. They know my favorite Holmes’ story is The Sign of Four. They know how many crimes I solved in Tokyo. All the information about me which anyone can read from the internet and newspaper and from what I told them when they ask, they know. Ran, you know all that. All that and more.”
He angles his head to the ceiling as if he’s talking to someone there. Ran supports his weight, curling to her knees as she silently listens.
“You know of my first ever deduction because Christ, my first deduction was about you. You know of the two cases which haunt me until this day because I watched the culprit die in front of my very eyes. You were with me the nights I locked myself in here thinking about them. You know of the interesting, the boring, the absurd cases, everything, because I told you or you were there. You know of the odd way I play the violin while I ponder over a case. You know I forget to eat when swamped with new books to read. I have three copies of The Sign of Four but the one I keep beside my bed and read almost weekly is the one you gave me on my tenth birthday and that is all I need. You know me for me, Ran. Everything about me that is off the record, the good and the bad, you know all of those. Only you. The same way I do... about you.”
She feels him crane slightly to the side, addressing her.
“Ran.”
“Mm.”
“I love you.”
Ran’s heart almost completely stops beating.
“I love you,” he whispers, “more than I am even supposed to.”
All words seem to have fizzled out of her vocabulary as she sits still, stunned at what she’s hearing.
“I’m happy growing up with you, studying with you, bickering with you, acting stupid with you, investigating with you, eating with you, napping with you, hugging you, holding you, taking care of you, simply... being with you. Before I know it, it’s not the cases or Holmes or mysteries that complete my days, it’s you.
“For you to keep repeating that ‘best friend’ phrase, I…” He lowers his head.
“For who knows how long, I’ve loved you as that and more.”
Someone pinch her because in no way can this be real.
“I was happy thinking you’re jealous because it meant a sliver of chance you feel the same way. We could’ve remedied the misunderstanding easily, Ran. We could’ve talked it over like we always do. But I was stupid and emotions were high and in the end I… kissed you…” he takes another deep breath, “But—but you kissed me back, and my heart couldn’t stay still...”
Pulse drumming loud, Ran tilts her head on the side where he leans, wanting to see the slightest expression he makes as he continues.
“If my deductions are wrong and you’re mad for a different reason, and—and you returned that for a different reason...” she hears the pang of remorse in his tone, “then please forget I ever said anything and I’ll leave myself to die in humiliation once I’m out of your sight.”
He lays one palm flat on the floor and she notices.
“But if my deductions are right and you were indeed jealous, I...” She feels his head swivel enough to feel his warm breath fan across her cheek, before shifting back front and releasing a slow, guttural exhale he’s kept contained within.
“I’ll wait... until you accept it. Accept me.”
Ran may have choked on her throat for how long she’s held her breath.
In spite of herself, she knows she doesn’t need to think of what to say. She had it all in her head before coming here. Yet expressing it out loud is a different matter.
She isn’t ready, but when will she ever be ready? Shinichi undoubtedly isn’t too. Yet here he is, laying the groundwork for her, no holds barred and a stuttering mess at that. How she plans to build from it is the question she asks herself next.
Inhaling as though bracing herself, she places a hand beside him, pinky slightly grazing his.
“I didn’t... You never showed any signs.”
Careful and calm, he extends his little finger over hers. She doesn’t flinch, and both hands crawl closer until two fingers overlap.
“Either I’m a great pretender or you’re incredibly dense.”
“I’m...I’m not dense.”
“I’m a bad actor, then.” He slides his hand further.
“I was trying so hard to be a supportive best friend for you.”
“I sensed that but ignored it because I didn’t want to assume anything.”
“You did though. Now we’re here.”
“Would you rather we aren’t?”
“I would rather we spend the last weeks of this year talking like normal than being stupid idiots before you leave.”
“It’s just two weeks, Ran.”
“Two special weeks I would’ve wanted to spend with my best frien-... with you.”
Without knowing it, his hand has completely nestled atop hers, four fingers curled between her thumb and index finger.
“Ran... You must really hate the idea of falling in love with me.”
“Eh?”
“You’re so wrapped with the thought that we’re simply best friends that you hold your love in chains as though it isn’t permitted to grow.”
“I… I didn’t want to ruin the only connection we have-”
“Two friends falling in love are still friends… They are also more. You cannot ruin an indefeasible connection. Friendship and love may be the only bond we have, but they’re the most important bond of all.”
Ran falls quiet.
“Geez…”
He releases a thick sigh, brushes his thumb across her splayed fingers.
“I have shit art appreciation skills, but I can take you to museums too... as a friend and as a date.” A beat, and a mumble. “Even to better museums than Tokyo Metropolitan Art Museum.”
She darts her head sideways, realizing something.
“Were you also…?”
“No.”
Ran doesn’t suppress the heartfelt giggle that bubbles out.
“Shun-san has a boyfriend, Shinichi.”
“I—” he pauses. “I wasn’t asking.” Ran giggles more.
“Shinichi.”
“Yes.”
“I love you too.”
The hand above squishes hers all too suddenly like he’s been blown away and is needing something to hold onto.
“I came here to give your present and to apologize for being so shallow and for acting without thinking and for a lot of things actually... but now I feel there’s no need, because then I wouldn’t have...” She looks down at their intertwined hands.
Before she can return his squeeze, he recoils.
“Oh, y-you do apologize. Running away like that.” He coughs, and she can practically hear the tripping in his tone.
“Aren’t you already used to it? I’ve done it many times,” she chides.
“No. Apologize,” he insists. “And look at me while you do.”
Ran’s stomach twists, heart kicking up a step.
It’s easy to talk without eye contact, but to be requested so after confessions are exchanged—
“Face me, Ran.”
The familiar voice of yearning strums her heartstrings, tone sounding a lot like a plea than an order and Ran finds her head instinctively craning at an angle, hand coiling on the floor trying to calm her nervous beating heart. She feels him shift behind as well.
She takes all her time to face him, partly unsure what to do, partly knowing exactly what she wants to do. Despite the deliberate slowness of their movements, it is when they lock eyes that time truly seems to stop.
Shinichi appears so different, so soulful. His blue irises glimmering, fixated on nothing but her as she reveres him with matching intensity. The same guy she treats as her best friend looks at her with tender love in his eyes, darting down her lips and up like no best friend ever would.
“I love you,” he says, breathless. “Make me your boyfriend.”
A wave of emotion sweeps over her, heartbeat fluttering in overdrive as they huddle on the floor, bags and clothes and time forgotten.
“From best friend to... such a shift-”
“Nothing will be different.” He rests his forehead on hers, gaze of soft blue patient though more intimate now, knowing what they share is mutual. “We’ll still do what we do... With exclusive romantic commitment and sweet nothings that translate to ‘I love you’ in more ways than one.”
She attempts a jab on his chest but he catches her fist, soft but jesting beam all too apparent and she does but play along.
“What about when we fight?” she asks.
“Same. But...” he slides a thumb over her quiet lips, parting them slightly, “I can do this once we make up.”
“...Like right now?”
“Like right now.”
A genuine smile is the last thing she sees before delicate pair of lips lands on hers, capping their one-week fight and their last night of the year together in the best and most unexpected way imaginable.
.
.
Ran keeps telling herself she shouldn’t be jealous.
Not because they are simply best friends, because they aren’t. Not because life would be easier if she didn’t involve herself in his business twenty-four seven, because it wouldn’t.
Not because Shinichi doesn’t look at her that way, because he does.
She shouldn’t be jealous because she absolutely has no reason to, is all.
“I haven’t forgotten about your present. I was planning to buy yours in Akita.”
“Stop lying, you totally forgot it.”
“I didn’t. Stop that.” Half-mast eyes rake her side profile, and Ran covers a mirthful grin with her mitted hand holding the umbrella, then yawns. Hours of packing and talking and laughing left them with roughly four hours of sleep. It isn’t like she slept the whole period because while sleeping in his room isn’t new, cuddling while they sleep is. Ran couldn’t simply shut her eyes and heart to that.
“I believe though,” he wraps a hand around her free one, pocketing both of them in his brand new overcoat, “I gave half of my present already.”
“Hnn. That doesn’t count as a gift.” Her hand shifted, coddling his own to a warm fit.
“Really?” A smug smirk pulls up his face. “I believe I am a nice present, Ran. That’s why they—”
“Screw this. You are unbelievable. A humbug. Why do people like you.”
“I know. Why do you like me?” Shinichi laughs as he avoids the swing of her umbrella.
From afar, they see Kaori and the girls at the meet-up point outside Tokyo Station, though they seem unaware of their presence yet. Suddenly feeling conscious, Ran feels the urge to disentangle her hand, but Shinichi holds on, firm.
“Why?” He asks in a low voice.
“I dunno… maybe this isn’t the best time…”
“Isn’t now the best time?” His smile is proud and natural, not one ounce of reluctance visible.
Although she gets what he means, that doesn’t free her of shyness and guilt. Somehow she feels like apologizing to Kaori for… she doesn’t know. She just wants to. Letting her see them like this makes her think that she’s giving her an indirect slap on the face. Shinichi certainly won’t agree because ‘What’s with women and their logic?’, but still, whether or not it’s all in her head, Ran needs more time to prepare for this.
But to her surprise, Shinichi lets go of her hand. They are still a few feet from view when he steps in front of her and turns around. “Maah, fine, I get it,” he huffs, then smiles. “Then, just give me your umbrella.”
The moment she does, Shinichi closes their distance and dips his face onto hers. Ran is given no leeway to gasp as loving lips seal her quiet. It isn’t as long as what they shared a week ago, but the emotions are loaded and full, speaking fond thanks and temporary farewell.
She doesn’t realize she has closed her eyes until he separates, and she’s met with the most tender, most angelic expression he wears only on the rarest occasions. He’s saying without telling that her feelings are valid, she doesn’t have to worry,  and he doesn’t have eyes for anyone but her. Somehow, the snow is the sea and fish are swarming around but neither cares because they have already caught each other.
“You don’t have to, silly.” Three layers of pink blanket Ran’s puffy cheeks.
“But I want to.” Grinning, Shinichi hands her back the umbrella. “You don’t like hand-holding. You don’t like being seen. Don’t you think that’s a great compromise?”
“Idiot, many people saw...”
“No, they didn’t!��� Upping the duffel bag slung on his shoulder, he steps back and gives her one last goofy beam. “I’ll see you next year, Ran. I’ll call as often as I can.”
Wordlessly, Ran watches Shinichi’s back as he jogs to his waiting companions, who by then have already had their eyes pinned on the approaching figure.
“That is Shinichi-kun! ...And Mouri-san!”
“Ehhh!!?! You’re a thing!”
So much for being subtle, Ran flushes inwardly as she returns the wave the other girls are giving her. At that moment she really does feel immature for her past conduct. All of them are sweet. Even Kaori.
“I knew it Shinichi-kun! Mouri-san is sooo lucky, I’m so jealous!” Ran hears their banter and sees her jab his bicep before acknowledging her. “We’ll take care of him, Mouri-san!”
The Ran from one week ago would’ve had her heart crushed by such declaration, but now she’s nothing but pleased and the smile that forms across her lips is nothing but honest. “Make sure he doesn’t drag your group into a random dead body, Kaori-san!”
“Hey!” surfaces Shinichi’s shout amidst the mincing laughter of the group and the onlooking passers-by, and Ran bids her last wave before they enter the station.
Smiling to herself, Ran returns home, the lingering promise of his kiss committed to memory, knowing that she doesn’t have to get jealous because she has no reason to. Their indefeasible bond is all the assurance she needs.
.
.
.
133 notes · View notes
lydias--stiles · 3 years
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canon juke fluff based on “till forever falls apart” by ashe and finneas
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Raucous laughter disappeared in a snap as the door slammed behind her. Her feet stumbled from the sudden change, finding her balance again and then hopping towards the garden gate. She left a glitter trail in her wake.
Julie turned seventeen today. She knew it’d be special the second she woke up, Carlos blaring ‘Dancing Queen’ like a little shit before her alarm clock went off. It was the most brotherly way he could congratulate her and she loved him for it. (Not after she chased him though - who the hell did that?!)
Flynn came by during breakfast, phasing through Alex without realising as she placed a glittery crown atop Julie’s curls. It was plastic and clunky and the number 17 was pink and glowed in the dark. Luke sat on the kitchen island teasing her for it, Reggie helping Ray make pancakes and yelling he wanted one too. It was barely seven am and her day was the best.
At school, she was showered with birthday wishes and her Instagram flooded with messages of people that confirmed they’d come to her party.  
Despite everything, her traitorous thoughts always ended up in the same spot. Luke. He teased her at breakfast, but he didn’t hug her like Alex and Reggie. He didn’t poof beside her as she walked down the driveway to quickly impart a joke or a secret or a lyric, something for her to mull about on the trek to school with Flynn. There was nothing.
On the one hand, it could just be pre-performance jitters. Luke took every gig a hundred percent seriously and got pretty intense if a lot of people were going to be watching. If he didn’t set the stage on fire in one song, he’d feel like he failed. So yeah, Julie allowed herself to think that was the case for his absentmindedness.
If only she didn’t know him so well. She knew it was something else entirely. She knew it had to do with her age; the fact that she aged. It was hard to not let it temper her birthday excitement, but all she wished for (just like when she blew out her candles for her sixteenth birthday) was for them to hide in her daydreams and be together without qualms. That he was hers.
Luke and her have made plenty of mistakes over the two years that they’ve known each other. Falling in love wasn’t one. She couldn’t believe that - even if he’d given her mixed signals since their fated gig at The Orpheum.
The party was a hit. Dad bought a big peanut butter chocolate cake and they played their best set ever, the studio decorated in an explosion of flowers and butterflies and streamers. Julie was in a glittery purple dress, the crown to match, each lyric coming from her lips laced with glee and pink lemonade. That perpetual thrill coursing through her as she danced with Reggie and hyped up Alex and - her favourite part of all - shared the mic with Luke. His aloof behaviour from before was gone then, coming towards her in that greedy way that made her heart stutter out of place.
Julie wondered if anyone ever believed he was a hologram prior to the band ‘moving to America’. How could they, when he’s always looked so alive and real and warm and with his eyes so intently on hers that it felt like he bore through her, straight to her soul.
Pushing through the sensation, she shot him a teasing grin and returned to the piano.
After the set, Flynn put her DJ skills to good use and put on a killer playlist. Julie danced until her feet ached, sang along until her throat hurt, ate cake until she was full. She was happy and seventeen. As the hours went by, more and more classmates trickled away, ending with her family hoarding the kitchen island as they ate the remnants of cake. All except one.
It hurt. Julie knew Luke was brooder - but on her birthday? Because he couldn’t handle it? Tomorrow, she'd be on her way to surpass them. First Reggie, then Alex and then Luke. Was it selfish of her for wanting to spend time with him? For wanting to dance with him? If just once? If Alex and Reggie could, why couldn’t he?
Without a second thought (or third, fourth, fifth - it was always and forever tethered to Luke), she stumbled out the front door towards the garden gate. Glitter stuck to the pavement.
The light was on in the studio, their safe haven surrounded by fallen decorations as if a storm had passed. Her bare foot kicked a balloon, a smile tugging on her lips as the purple thing drifted and bounced against the trees.
She slid the doors open. There he was.  
“Luke?”
His back was turned towards her, head bent over the grand piano as he fervently wrote in his trusty songbook. More songs were theirs than just his in there, she knew, and it left her warm.
He perked up, head turning, a gentle smile on his lips. “Hey birthday girl. You look like shit.”
She laughed, coming closer, and watched as more glitter fell to the floor. She must look like a sweaty, exhausted disco ball. Despite this, a sense of calmness washed over her. Luke was here and he was smiling at her and everything made sense again.
“Thanks,” she jabbed. “You look even worse.”
Tensing his muscles, as if she hadn’t seen them before, he smirked. “Please. The sweat makes my arms look better.”
The smile stuck to her cheeks, stupidly enamoured by his silliness, and remembered a time when she didn’t allow herself to feel like this. But that was before the late night sessions in the studio, before he became corporeal, before he placed tender kisses on her forehead before important gigs, as if infusing her with the power to kill it, before he hung out in her room and before he allowed her to know more about 90s-Luke. (There wasn’t much difference. According to his stories, he was just as endearing then.)
Before one frustrated kiss between them, months ago, nearly blew everything up. If the band and their connection wasn’t so tight, she didn’t know what would’ve happened. They never spoke about it. Perhaps the knowledge that it happened, the idea that it could happen again, realising that her daydreams weren’t one-sided - it left her yearning. Who would blame her? She was seventeen.  
The kiss had been a mistake, but that ‘stupidly enamoured’ feeling? It was only a natural reaction. She didn’t want anyone else.
Crossing the final distance, Julie tightly wrapped her arms around him. Luke held her close, face burrowed in her neck and letting his waning body spray and her flowery perfume melt together.
“You haven’t given me a hug today,” she whispered.
He nodded. “I know.”
She bit back a sigh. This couldn’t be a mistake too. “Why?”
“Cause you’re seventeen,” he muttered. “I can’t pretend you’re-”
“Younger?”
His palms curled around her, pulling back slightly to look her in the eye. The green, bright yet troubled, flitted across her face. Dejected, it dropped to the ground, as if the sight of her brought him wonder and ache at once. Could she tell him it was mutual? Could she-
“Able to be mine.”
It was uttered so quietly, she almost didn’t catch it. It was as if the world went off its axis, both precariously close to falling off the edge and Julie debating whether that would be a bad thing or not. If it really was that insane if it meant she got to be right here, in his arms.
The feeling coiled in her stomach, pushed itself up her ribcage, straight through her heart and slid past her throat. The words danced on her lips, lively and colourful and devoted.
And then she said it. “I love you.”
His eyes slowly locked with hers, a glint of uncertainty found beneath. The lack of surprise on his part would make her laugh had she not been so terrified to lose him completely, all at once. His fingers pressed into her skin, like she’d be the one backtracking her words and running out. Like he wasn’t the one with the ability to vanish from her grasp.
Luke exhaled and dropped his forehead against hers, gaze unwavering. Her instincts told her to shut her eyes, look away, maybe even bridge the gap, but they were so close to finally becoming something. Whatever that might be.  
“Why aren’t you scared?”, he breathed. 
Her nervous hands found solace on his cheeks. “I am scared. And it’s despite that. All I wanted today, Luke, was have you be with me.” And then her eyes clenched tight anyway, overwhelmed by the moment. “I’m scared and- and despite everything… I love you.”
Her vulnerability hanging by a thread, she watched as he processed her words. She had no clue if she said or did the right thing, though her hands were frozen in place. Her heart rate picked up when he mirrored her, calloused fingers slipping from her shoulders to her face.
Luke swallowed, hard. “I’m sorry that- that I’ve been distant. But I’m scared and not for the reasons you think. I’m scared cause-” His chuckle was like a candle awakening in a dark cave. “-cause I don’t wanna spend a minute loving anyone else.”
The previous terror washed away, a brilliant smile blooming on her lips at his confession. Her head tilted, allowing her nose to brush his and sigh when he didn’t pull back.
“I was scared cause I thought you didn’t want that,” he finished.
Her voice drowned in reverence. “I do want that. I want you. Until…” Shaking her head, she let out the truth. “Until the universe takes you back.”
The boy laughed, relief sagging his shoulders and pulling so impossibly close, so tightly it should’ve hurt - had euphoria not been bursting in her chest at the simple action. His watery eyes held all she ever wanted to see. Him. Honestly, truly, him.
“I-”, he stuttered, his own anxious smile stopping him. Her thumbs pressed into the lines, urging him to keep going. It softened, in that earnest way only he knew of. “I think I fell back on this earth to be with you, Julie. I think- I know I’m yours.” That incredulous laugh erupted from his chest again, so full, as if it’d been waiting. “I’m so glad I get to hold you.”    
There was so much she wanted to say - that she was his, has always been his, that it was insane because they were so young, but what the hell was time anyway? Julie wanted to be with him, forever, until forever disintegrated like smoke between her fingers.
Now, she cradled his cheeks and he was warm. And he told her he loved her, in ways she never expected him to.
Instead of speaking, Julie kissed him. Her lips were sticky from soda and his still held the taste of lovesick words and lyrics, but it was perfect. Their mouths puckered from smiling, that damned kiss from months ago replaced by this one. It felt as if all her wishes, her restless midnight questions, all were granted by one simple touch. By his arms wrapping around her and hers gripping onto his jaw and hair. So tight, so close, as if the tides of Fate would pull the other away right this second.
But nothing happened that second. And the one after that. And again, again, again. They kissed and the universe allowed them to.
Julie didn’t think there was a more beautiful way to fall in love.
With a quiet thrill leading up her spine, she told him. “I think this year might be fun,” the girl grinned against his lips. “The first year of forever of giving my heart to you.”
His tender gaze rested on hers, relaxed hands caressing her back. Love was a good look on him. “Are you gonna say stuff like that now? To fuck with me?”
She giggled, glee bursting at the seams. “You started!”
“Yeah.” Luke trailed off, a dopey smile glittering his eyes. Just as he leaned in for another kiss, he stilled. “Oh! I was writing some stuff for a song!” Nodding at the discarded notebook on the piano, he asked: “Wanna work on it?”
Just like that, they were back to being Luke and Julie. Singers, musicians, writing partners, best friends, each other’s forever.
Propping the glittery crown on his head, she matched his fond expression and went to sit on the piano bench. “Yeah, show me.”
Julie would look back on that moment and smile. Two seventeen year olds, defying Fate and the Universe and everything in between, mocking the stars that yes, Luke and her did belong together. There was strength in knowing their forever was predetermined, that they knew it wouldn’t be eternal, but that that was okay. Every second mattered then. Every laugh became fuller, a kiss more passionate, a smile brighter. They spent a lifetime, counted in quick adolescent years, sharing their hearts.
For a while, Luke was hers. And forevermore would they be together - in the whispers of songs, in memories, in lingering cologne on clothing.
It was the sweetest, most adventurous romance of all.  
But that wasn’t important now. Luke sat next to her, held his notebook out, and together they did what they knew best. When the clock struck midnight, all he did was kiss her again.
“You know,” he muttered, lips brushing her ear. “The things we said? Might make for a killer song.”  
Julie’s nose scrunched up in delight, thumbing to a fresh page and clicking her pen. Nuzzling into his neck and interlacing their free hands, she swore she felt it. Their tether. It was real - just as real as him loving her and her loving him. It was there. She took a deep breath.  
“Let’s do it.”
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
@blush-and-books​ @bluefirewrites​ @unsaid-emily​ @willexx​ @ourstarscollided​ @constantly-singing​ @ruzek-halstead​
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donablue · 3 years
Text
this particular store is usually deserted around this time of day, so anto is always a little thrown on the rare occasion when he finds someone else there when he walks in. but this time it's a familiar face that wheels around to face him, surprise taking over it before he's greeted with a loud, "anto!"
"what's the story, champ?" he makes his way over to posy and bumps his arm into her shoulder. she bumps him back and anto stifles a small laugh at how it's less of a bump and more her bouncing ineffectively off his arm.
"wig shopping! i am not liking this one anymore," posy explains, absently gesturing at the pink wig currently on her head while she turns back to the mannequin heads displaying the range of wigs. she shoots him a glance out of the corner of her eyes. "what is being your story?"
he could say anything. and yet he opts for the truth. "last storm knocked one of my earrings loose, so i'm in the market for a new pair."
judging from the quirk of posy's eyebrows, she hadn't been expecting him to actually explain himself. he hadn't expected it either, really, but there's always been something about posy that settles him enough to offer up bits of honesty that he wouldn't afford anyone else.
when she doesn't reply, anto moves away to browse the lines of jewelry along the nearest wall. he's about halfway through the first display before posy speaks up.
"can i be choosing them for you?"
she's no longer looking at the wigs and is instead staring at him, looking borderline excited already.
"well, shit," he mutters to himself under his breath. anto knows he's going to give in but he gives himself the illusion of thinking it over for a beat before his shoulders sag and he lets out a sigh. "yeah, alright. nothing pink, though, alright?"
brilliant smile fixed on her face, posy hums her acknowledgment and runs to his side. her focus turns intense as she mulls over the displays in front of them, considering every piece carefully before she moves onto the next, and anto has to fight back the fond twist of his lips.
waiting patiently next to posy, his gaze flicks back and forth between her expression of concentration to the jewelry cases until she says, apropos of nothing, "i have never been thanking you."
"what–?" anto balks. "the fuck do you have to be thanking me for?"
"for not cheating at the duel. or, i guess, not totally cheating at the duel."
thinking about the duel still leaves a sour taste in anto's mouth. it makes his temple ache with the phantom pain of a bullet ripping past, just barely avoiding killing him outright.
"it was nice of you to be giving him a chance to fire back," posy continues, not having stopped to look up at him.
"he shot me in the face, posy," he grumbles, not caring how petulant it comes out.
"i said it was nice, not smart," she clarifies, and anto is torn between laughing hysterically and snarling.
he settles for bristling, shoulders hunching as he huffs out a harsh breath. "should've killed the bastard when i had the chance."
"grognak would never have forgiven you," posy states matter-of-factly, "and troy is being my best friend, so i'm happy you didn't."
nostrils flaring as he mentally flinches away from thinking about what grognak would have done if he'd actually killed troy, anto grunts and deflects, "yeah, well. i've done worse before. wouldn't have been the first time, or the last. all part of the job description, posy."
silences settles over them for a minute, and anto is pretty certain that posy's eyes don't move from the same set of earrings the entire time. that is, until she turns to meet his eyes and surprises him again.
"i killed someone too."
eyeing the woman skeptically, anto leans his hip against a display case and crosses his arms. "you? you, posy, have killed someone?"
"i have!" her stare is defiant and anto is reminded once again of why he's fond of her.
"just the one?"
"as far as i am knowing, yes," posy replies.
the cryptic answer makes him narrow his eyes at her until posy admits, "i suffered the blunt force traumas from having my face beaten in with a flashlight, so i don't remember. but thomas says it was to protect peoples! captain planet was stabbing people on the pier! i don't know why he died, i was only hitting him once with my flashlight!"
the distress on her face is too much for him. placing a hand on posy's shoulder, anto gives her a small shake and ducks down to look her in the eye.
"no offence, posy, but accidentally killing someone isn't the same. what do you know about being a gangster?"
"oh!" somehow, that seems to distract her from the turn the conversation had taken. she turns on her heel and darts towards the back, presumably into one of the changing rooms, leaving him to stand alone in the middle of the store without a response.
he can hear her rustling around so he goes back to browsing the shelves. watches, earrings, glasses, bracelets, necklaces, all easy enough to pluck from their stands and stuff into a pocket when he finds something he likes or deems good enough to sell off. a glimmer catches his eye and he turns to inspect it. there's a pair of earrings that look like they might be real amethysts, judging from the locked case enclosing them. with a glance over his shoulder, anto sets to picking the lock, smirking to himself when it pops open and he can snake a hand in to snatch the earrings. the case is closed again and the jewelry is safely in anto's hand when the sound of a curtain being drawn back reaches him, and he smoothly tucks them away into his jacket pocket, moving to greet posy when she comes out.
whatever he'd been expecting, he's not prepared for the sight of posy striding over to square up to him in her new outfit. it's not plain, but strangely muted compared to the other clothes anto has seen her in. her hands settle on her hips and she straightens up to her full height, puffing her chest out proudly.
"i am a solo dolo but i have respect all over the 'hood!" she declares, and anto's eyebrows shoot up his forehead.
"that right?"
he has to bite the inside of his cheek to keep himself from smiling, but his disbelief must come across loud and clear in his tone because the next thing he knows, posy is flashing him a grin and has her gun trained just to the left of him. "what is up, motherfucker?" she chirps.
his resolve cracks and laughter startles out of him.
it's not often that something reduces him to tears of laughter, but he doubles over and laughs until he can manage to straighten up, breathless and sporting blurry vision. "jesus– fair play, then. who taught you that one?"
"the ballas gave me gangster lessons," posy elaborates, grinning widely as he allows himself another few chuckles. "we've been killing, slicing, and gangbanging."
that sets him off again.
"they let me paint maxwell purple! steven thought i joined the gang, but i am thinking they are being liking me. like abdul with the vagos!" she explains further, watching him as he leans back against a display case to catch his breath.
"explains the purple wig." he jerks his chin in the general direction of her head, hand coming up to clutch at his ribs where he feel a faint ache. his eyes drift down to where her gun has come to rest against her side and he arches an eyebrow after a beat. "that a diamondback? what do you need that kind of firepower for, eh?"
posy spares the weapon a glance before she tucks it back into her jacket. "troy gave it to me. or pillbot. they both gave me one, it is being for protections. one of them got stolen though."
sobering slightly, anto nods, recalling the abridged version of events she's told him before. he tucks the first question that comes to mind, and the accompanying prickle of curiosity to know where troy would have gotten a diamondback from, away. "you let me know if you need something else, got it? don't want you walking around without a strap."
there's a long pause that nearly makes anto fidget with how intently posy stares at him. the moment abruptly ends and she rewards him with a sunny smile. "okay! peace, pimp!"
she's already made her way back into a dressing room by the time his stunned silence gives way to another bout of raucous laughter.
they don't spend long in the store after that, with posy quickly settling on a new blue wig and moving onto insisting he get a matching pair of stud earrings for himself. despite himself, anto caves. he buys them.
he's securing the backing of the second earring into place as they step back outside. when his hands fall back down to his sides, posy looks him over and gives him an approving nod. he returns the favour, making a show of inspecting the look of her new wig before nodding gravely. "right deadly," he announces.
"right deadly," posy returns with another nod.
his chest warms and, for a second, he allows his face soften.
posy moves towards her car, a little thing that he's seen a few times which, sure enough, has been painted puple.
"it was nice to be seeing you without... um. yeah!" she calls out once she's seated behind the wheel.
the corner of his mouth twitches up into a half smile as he fills in the blanks himself. "sure, look, we'll link up later, yeah? i've some stuff to sell."
he's about to turn away and head back to the shit car he'd stolen to get here, but he stops to consider briefly before jogging over to the driver's side of posy's car right as the engine comes to life. crouching down and rifling through his pockets, anto finds what he's looking for right as posy rolls the window down with a curious expression. reaching into the car and tugging one of posy's hands towards him, he deposits his favourite set of brass knuckles into her open palm and folds her fingers over it.
"easier to hide than a gun," he says by way of explanation and leaves it at that before he dashes away.
her excited "oh!" is easily heard and anto allows himself a pleased grin as he slides into his stolen car and promptly throws it into reverse, honking twice before he speeds away.
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waitimcomingtoo · 4 years
Text
Wait For Me
Pairing: Peter Parker x Reader
Synopsis: you tell Cap the story of all the times you and Peter waited for each other. Takes place during Engame
Listen to Wait For Me from Hadestown for the inspiration behind this story
Masterlist
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6 years ago
“Whats the B for?” You asked as you traced your fingers over the shiny brass clasp of Peters suitcase. It was your first time hearing of his superhero abilities, and he had pulled out his suit to confirm his identity. You had always known there was something special about Peter, something that set him apart. Him being a superhero came as no surprise to you, so you were more distracted by the monogrammed suitcase where he kept his suit.
“Benjamin. Like my uncle.” He said as he watched your face for any signs of judgement. There was the slightest whisper of a smile on your lips as you rubbed your thumb over the engraving.
“I remember him.” You nodded and looked up at Peter, squinting your eyes to get a good look at him. “Benjamin. I like that for you. It’s fitting.”
“Is it? I always thought Benjamin was an old mans name.” He laughed shyly as he scratched behind his ear.
“No. It’s cute.” You told him and he flushed. “You look like a Peter Benjamin, you know? Some people just look like their names.”
Peters mouth opened and shut a few times and he tried to think of a response. He wasn’t used to talking to you everyday, much less used to how pretty you’d gotten. 10 years apart and suddenly you were hanging out in his bedroom everyday, catching up on the part a of each other’s lives that you had missed. Your delicate features, now more defined with age but still soft, made it hard for Peter to think around you. He thought he’d never see you again after you left but here you were, folded up in his bed and running you fingers over the material of his Spiderman suit.
“I’d say the same for you, but you never told me your middle name.” He said finally, thinking back in his memory for any indication of what it was. “It begins with an E right?”
You smiled softly at him, appreciating his keen memory.
“Eurydice.” You told him and he tilted his head.
“What?” He asked, not realizing that was the name.
“It’s Eurydice.” You repeated. “It’s from greek mythology. It was my mother’s favorite story growing up.”
“What’s the story?” Peter set the suitcase on the ground and scored closer to you to give you his full attention.
“You really wanna know?” You tested him, still able to tell when he was lying.
“With all my heart.” He said as he crossed his heart with his fingers. You rolled your eyes at him, not having seen that movement since you were litter.
“Okay. There are a few different versions, but this one is my favorite.” You began. “A long time ago, there was a poor woman called Eurydice and she was married to a musician named Orpheus. Eurydice knew they were gonna starve if they didn’t make some money and buy food, but all Orpheus wanted to do was make music. She ended up selling her soul to Hades-“
“Wait, you were named after a devil worshipper?” Peter cut you off with a laugh.
“No.” You shoved him playfully. “Hades is the god of the Underworld. He’s not the devil.“
“Okay. Go on.” He urged you, leaning his chin on his hands, unintentionally squishing his cheeks.
“So Eurydice sells her soul and gets sent to the Underworld. When Orpheus finds out, he goes on this long, dangerous journey to the Underworld to find her. He gets there and plays his music for Hades, the song he’s been working on instead of getting food. Hades was so moved by his music that made a deal with him: if he can walk out of the Underworld with Eurydice following behind him, they can both go free.” You went on, smiling at Peters squished face.
“Sounds easy enough.” He shrugged.
“It wasn’t.” You held up a finger. “There was a catch. Orpheus was never allowed to look back and make sure Eurydice was still behind him. He just had to trust that she was. He wasn’t allowed to look at her until they were both out.”
“So what happened?” Peter leaned forward, eager to hear the rest.
“They walk the long, scary way back to earth, guided only by a lantern. Orpheus goes the whole way and never looks at her. But right as he’s about to make it out-“ ,You paused for effect and Peter whined in anticipation, “-he caves. He looks at her and she’s sent straight back.”
“He couldn’t do it? He couldn’t take that last step?” Peter exclaimed, frustrated with the ending.
“He couldn’t wait to see his wife.” You sided with Orpheus to defend him.
“But he was so close!” Peter whined, getting worked up over a fictional story.
“I know. That’s what makes the story as beautifully tragic as it is.” You told him.
“Orpheus was an idiot. You’re lucky she named you after Eurydice instead.” Peter grumbled and you laughed easily.
“He wasn’t an idiot. He could see the world for how it could be, in spite of the way that is was. He just couldn’t wait to see his wife.” You said softly, still taking Orpheus’s defense.
“I bet I could do it. I could’ve gotten us both out.” Peter said definitively after a beat of silence.
“Oh, yeah? You think you could be patient and trust your girl?” You challenged him.
“If I truly loved her, yes. I’d wait forever if I had too.” Peter said confidently. “Wouldn’t you?”
You thought about it for a moment, not blind to the irony of his question. You looked Peter deep in his warm brown eyes, the eyes of your best friend since you were little, and nodded.
“Yeah. I think I would.” You said softly.
1 month ago
“What about you? You haven’t move on?” A member of Cap’s support group sounded from beside you, tearing you away from the memory. You blinked as you came back to reality and saw the faces of the rest of the members looking at you expectantly, including Cap.
“Sorry?” You asked, not having heard the question when you were lost in your daydream.
“You mentioned in the first meeting that you lost your boyfriend in the Blip.” The member, a man who lost his wife and daughter, repeated. “Have you moved on from him yet?”
“No.” You said, sitting up and fixing your shirt. “No, I haven’t.”
“Why is that after five years of him being gone? You’re the only one in the group who hasn’t moved on.” He asked. He wasn’t being reproachful, just curious. You and Cap were the leaders of the group and watched each week as the members slowly got their lives back to normal after losing their significant other in the Blip. It hadn’t even occurred to you that you were the only one who hadn’t moved on.
“Because I’ve already met the love of my life.” You said confidently. “I know it’s been 5 years. But I have already met the man I’m supposed to be with. Now I just have to wait for him to come come. He waited for me, and now I’m waiting for him.”
“He might not come for a long time, if he ever does.” A woman in the group spoke up. She wasn’t trying to be harsh, just realistic. You gave her a tight smile and nodded.
“I know.” You said. “But that doesn’t matter to me. I’ll wait forever if I have too.”
The meeting ended shortly after a few more members told their stories. It was nearing the anniversary of the Blip, and everyone was on edge. You were quiet as you and Cap stacked the chairs up, obviously to his stare.
“What did you mean back there when you said he waited for you?” Steve asked gently as he pushed a row of chairs against the wall. You tucked a strand of hair behind your ear, suddenly aware of how long it had gotten, and leaned against the row.
“It’s kinda a long story.” You told him. He took two chairs off the stack and set them down, gesturing for you to take a seat.
“I have time.” He remarked as he took a seat. You laughed lightly as his action and sat down, picking nervously at your nail polish.
“I met Peter when we were 3, and we were best friends almost instantly.” You began. “We learned how to ride bikes together, started school together, basically made all our foundational memories together.”
“Okay.” Steve nodded, urging you to go on.
“My dad did a lot of business in California when I was little and when he got promoted, he decided to move there. My parents didn’t tell me about the move until the day we were leaving. I was crying my eyes out in the taxi when we passed Peter’s apartment building.” You said, looking up at Steve to see his reaction. He was looking at you intently, having never heard you tell the story before. “I pressed my hands against the window of the taxi and stared at his building, totally heartbroken, until an idea came to me. Mind you, I was 7 at the time and had a love of action movies.”
“You didn’t.” He smiled coyly, knowing what was coming.
“I did.” You chuckled. “I jumped out of the moving car and just booked it. I didn’t stop running until I got to his door.”
15 years ago
“Y/n? What are you doing here?” Peter asked as he opened his door to you. You had done your secret knock so he knew it was you.
“I have to go, Peter. I’m moving. My daddy got a new job.” You panted, out of breath from running. Peters eyes widened, hearing the world possible news of his short life.
“Moving? Where?” He asked, suddenly aware of your red eyes and running nose, all signs that you had been crying.
“California.” You told him.
“Like with the movie stars?” He asked, childlike excitement replacing the pain.
“Yeah. That’s what my daddy said.” You nodded, remembering what your dad had told you to keep you from crying. You had to leave your best friend, but you’d be with the movie stars.
“When are you leaving?” Peter asked, picking at the paint on his door.
“Today.” You finally caught your breath. “We’re going to the airport right now.”
“But…but I won’t get to see you if you’re in California.” Peter mumbled, starting to get emotional.
“I know. I don’t want to go, Peter.” You shook your head, beginning to cry again.
“Then don’t go.” Peter protested. “You can stay here with me. Aunt May and Uncle Ben won’t mind.“
“Okay. Okay, and then we can stay together.” You agreed, liking his plan.
“Y/n?” Are you up here?” You suddenly heard your mothers voice and your eyes widened, as well as Peters.
“Get inside.” Peter pulled you in his apartment and slammed the door behind you, reaching up on his tippy toes to lock the door. You both panted from the quick move, the sound of the phone ringing get drowned out by your heavy breathing.
“I don’t want to leave you, Peter. You’re my best friend.” You cried, bunching the end of your dress in your fists.
“You’re my best friend too.” Peter hiccuped as he cried. You wiped your cheek on the back of your hand and used the bottom of your dress to wipe his face too. He smiled at you, giving you that warm feeling he always did.
“Please don’t fall in love with anybody else.” You blurted. “Wait for me to come back.”
“What?” Peter hiccuped again.
“I’m gonna grow up and I’m gonna make my own money and I’m gonna find my way back to you. Or, or I’ll run away and get on an airplane.” You plotted as Peter nodded along. “I’m gonna come back for you, Peter. I will, I promise I will. You just need to wait until I get back so we can get married.”
“Peter? Is Y/n here?” Mays voice called from the kitchen, making you both jump. You hugged each other and backed away as May came into the room.
“Go away!” Peter screamed, fully in hysterics now.
“Y/n, sweetie, your mom is on the phone. She said you ran away from the taxi.” May said gently as she bent down to talk to you. She noticed your scrapped knee, bleeding now, but you didn’t even seem to notice.
“I’m not going. I’m not leaving Peter.” You stated, clinging to him tighter.
“What’s going on here?” Ben asked when he heard the noise. He saw his recently orphaned nephew clutching his best friend and immediately understood.
“I can’t go to California. I won’t! I won’t leave Peter.” You cried, gripping the back of Peters overalls for supports.
“Aw, honey.” May sighed in sympathy as she out a hand over her heart at the sight of the terrified children. “It’s okay. You and Peter can write each other letters and video chat. You’ll still be able to see each other.”
“No! She has to move in with us.” Peter shot down Mays idea. Her heart broke for her nephew, already having witnessed him lose so much. The flowers from his parents were still on the table. She couldn’t bear to see him lose his best friend too.
“She can’t Peter. She has to be with her own mommy and daddy.” May tried to reason with him.
“Why? I’m not with mine.” Peter protested, making May tear up. Before she could respond, your mother knocked on the door.
“May? Ben? Is Y/n with you?” Your mother asked through the door. You and Peter began to tremble as you clung to each other.
“No!” You screamed, cowering into the crook of Peters neck.
“Ben, can you settle them down?” May asked as she went to open the door. You and Peter tried to run but Ben caught you.
“Now listen you two, if you really love each other and I know you do, you’ll find your way back.” Ben said prophetically, making you and Peter release your grip a little. “I met your Aunt May once when I was 7, and again when I was 17. I believe in you two. I believe you’ll be reunited one day. But for right now, Y/n has to say goodbye.”
You slowly let go of Peter and turned to face him, tears streaming down your young face.
“Goodbye, Peter.” You mumbled, dry heaving from how upset you were. Your mother and May exchanged glances, not being able to watch their children say goodbye.
“Goodbye, Y/n.” Peter whimpered, wrapping his arms around you and giving you the tightest hug he could.
“Wait for me?” You whispered in his ear.
“I will.” He whispered back.
“Promise?” You asked as you pulled away.
“Promise.” Peter said as he crossed his heart. You did the same before your mother took your hand. You cried as she dragged you out of the apartment, looking back and reaching for Peter the entire way. You broke free from her for a moment and ran to Peter, kissing him on the lips like you’d seen the movies stars do. His eyes were wide open the entire time, but he liked it. Your mother scooped you up, said goodbye to May and Ben, and left the apartment. May and Ben stared at Peter as he touched his lips, still feeling your kiss. He sniffled, trying not to cry again as he watched his best friend leave him for the next ten years.
1 month ago.
“So, yeah. That was the first time he and I were separated. I don’t know which time was worse. They both killed me, just with different weapons. At least when we were 7, I was able to say goodbye.” You shrugged it off as you finished telling Steve your story. He stared at you in awe as you kept your composure. He had listened to a hundred songs stories about losing a loved one, but none of them had moved him like that did.
“How did you guys reconnect? Did you actually run away?” Steve asked, fully invested in the story now. You chuckled softly as his keen memory.
“No. I tried to but I never got very far.” You told him. “I ended up moving back to New York for college. My friend and I rented an apartment instead of living on campus.”
6 years ago.
“Shoot. I’ll meet you up there. I forgot a bag in the lobby.” Your roommate sighed when she realized she was missing her carry on.
“Okay. Text me when you get it.” You told her. Instead of getting on the elevator, you decided to stretch your legs and take the stairs. You had lugged your suitcase up a long flight and were about to round the corner when you smacked into someone. You almost went flying down the stairs, but something grabbed your shirt, something you’d later find out was a web, and sent you in the other direction. You collided with the stranger, feeling their firm grasp around your waist to keep you from falling back. You both panted as you caught your breath, feeling the strangers breath fam your face.
“I’m so sorry! I wasn’t looking and-Y/n?” The man asked. You blinked a few times as you stared at his face until you realized you knew those brown eyes.
“Oh my God, Peter?” You whispered as your eyes scanned his face, memorizing every new line and crease. His eyes were just as wide as yours, studying your features right back. An unfamiliar feeling filled your tummy as you stared at your childhood best friend, now fully grown. You couldn’t find the words to express how you were feeling, so you let go of your suitcase and wrapped your arms around his neck. Peter hugged you back immediately, taking in your scent. You were wearing perfume, something you hadn’t done when you were seven, but his super scent allowed him to smell your usual smell underneath it. Hugging you now felt different than it had when you were younger. His arms were wrapped around your hips, something you definitely didn’t have before. Your forever messy hair was longer and neat for once, as he was always used to seeing it in two braids. He could’ve cried holding you, but he didn’t want to scare you off. You pulled away and cupped his cheeks, smiling at what you saw.
“You look exactly the same.” You let out a breathy laugh. He did. He still had the boyish features you loved. The only difference now was he was taller and incredibly fit.
“Is that a good thing?” He chuckled, pleased to see your smile was just as he remembered.
“It’s the best thing.” You nodded, looking him up and down. “I can’t believe you never grew into your ears.”
“And you! You finally learned to brush your hair.” He dished it right back and you realized how much you missed his sense of humor, even better now with age.
“Shut up.” You scrunched your nose and smoothed your hand down with your hair. “What are you doing here? Did you move?”
“You remember my old place?” He raised his eyebrows, suddenly aware that his was still holding on to you. It didn’t seem to bother you, so he didn’t move.
“Uhh, Lee Towers apartment building, room 4D with the little flower sign under the peephole.” You recited, the view of his apartment door forever engraved in your no memory. The door always looked so big when you went from your height. “How could I forget? I practically lived there.”
“I know you did.” Peter smiled brightly at the memory of all your days spent in his apartment, the apartment he said goodbye too once Ben died. “May and I moved here a few months after high school started for a fresh start.”
“And I just moved here for college.” You said, mostly to yourself as the wheels in your Brian turned. You looked at Peter fondly and a smile tugged at your lips. “Your Uncle was right.”
“What do you mean?” He furrowed his eyebrows as you his face flushed from your close proximity.
“We found our way back to each other.” You said softly, your breath ticking his face.
“Yeah. I guess we did.” He bit back a smile, still reeling that he had you back in his arms after 10 years.
“Come on. You can tell me everything that’s happened for the past ten years while you help me unpack.” You grabbed his suitcase with one hand and his arm with the other. “But first, I gotta see May.”
1 month ago
“We talked the entire day. The sun started coming up and I was still telling him stories.” You smiled to yourself as you remembered the reunion. “We bounced back so easily, I felt like I had never left.”
“When two people are that right for each other, time has no effect. I speak from experience.” Steve smirked, a knowing gleam in his eyes.
“I know you do, lover boy.” You teased him. “I’ve seen your lady. She’s absolutely gorgeous.” You commented, having seen the photo of Peggy he kept on him more than a few times.
“She was.” He agreed. “And I found her just as pretty as an old broad as I did when we first met. Time meant nothing to me.”
“See? Sometimes, moving on is the wrong way to go. Some people are worth waiting for.” You decided, happy to have someone who agreed with you.
“So what happened next? Did you guys fall in love right away?” Steve asked, curious in the ending.
“No. It took about 3 months for us to finally bring up that conversation from before I left. We focused on rebuilding our friendship first.” You explained.
“I tell ya, I haven’t been this invested in a story since my presumedly dead best friend from the war showed up with a metal arm and a bloodlust.” Steve chuckled. “Keep going. How did you get together?”
“Relax. I’ll tell you.” You chuckled easily. “He and I had just got home from a college party. There was drinking, but Peter and I stayed away from that. A boy in our biology class, however, did not. He was flirting with me a little too much for Peters liking. I didn’t flirt back, but that didn’t matter to Peter. Another boy was after me and he got upset.”
5 years ago
��Whew. I don’t know about you, but think I’ve hit my party limit for the next month.” You blew out a breath as you kicked your heels off into the corner of Peters rooms
“No, me too.” Peter agreed, admiring the way you looked in your party dress one last time before you changed out of it. You shut the door to his bathroom but left it slightly ajar as you changed behind it. Peter made sure not to look, happy that you couldn’t see the flush on his face. You emerged from the bathroom in a hoodie and sleep shorts, taking a seat on Peters bed.
“You’re quiet.” You poked him, tilted your head to meet his eyes. “What’s up?”
“Nothing.” He shook his head and took your feet into his lap to rub them, knowing they were aching from your high heels. “Did you uh, get Brads number?”
“He told me his number but there were letters and some movie titles in it, so I’d say no.” You laughed, wincing a little when he touched a sore spot.
“He was all over you.” Peter grumbled, moving your feet next to his lap so he could trace small patterns on your leg.
“He was also drunk on 5 Black Cherry White Claws and wearing his belt on his head.” You reminded him in an attempt to cheer him up. He was clearly upset over something, you could tell by the way he wouldn’t look at you.
“He’s on the soccer team.” Peter brought up and you looked at him strangely. “I heard he gets good grade too.”
“Are you trying to set us up or something?” You laughed him off as you pulled your knees up to your chest to lean your chin on them.
“No. No, I just…” ,he sighed, “do you like him? In that way, I mean?”
“Peter, I don’t even know him.” You dismissed the idea. “Plus, he made a total fool of himself tonight. He threw any chance he had with me away the second he opened his mouth to show me his Viking impression.”
“Do you like anyone else, then?” He asked with a shrug, slowly looking up at you.
“Why are you asking me this?” You asked him curiously. You never talked about things like this together, lest it lead to a conversation neither of you were ready for.
“I’ve just been thinking a lot lately.” Peter admitted, looking down at his hands nervously. “Do…do you remember the last thing we talked about? Before you left, I mean.”
“When I asked you to wait for me?” You laughed softly, noticing the tips of his ears turning pink.
“Yeah, that.” He gulped.
“Of course I do.” You shrugged like to were not big deal, even though it was the biggest deal to Peter. “To this day, that’s the boldest thing I’ve ever done. Kissing you and then running away? I pulled a real Cinderella on you that night.”
“I thought it was sweet.” Peter defended, slightly offended that you were taking the situation as lightly as you were.
“It was stupid. We were kids and we had no idea when we were gonna see each other again. At the time, I had no idea how unrealistic I was being, or how much I was asking of you. Didn’t I propose to you or something?” You cringed at the memory. Peter stared at you in shock, angry that you were making fun of one of the most momentous moments of his childhood.
“I didn’t think you were asking for that much.” He said assertively. “Nothing I wasn’t planning on doing anyway.”
“What were you planning on doing?” You asked, finally noticing how upset he was.
“Waiting for my best friend to come back so I could be with her.” Peter said, tears stinging his eyes as he tried to compose himself. “Marry her, even.”
“Shut up.” You shoved him playfully, but he didn’t let up. Your smile faded when you realized he was serious.
“Why are you making this a joke?” Peter asked bitterly. “Do you know how hard that day was for me?”
“Do I know how hard it was?” You repeated in shock. “Peter, I had to leave my home and get on a plane to live in an entirely new state that I had never been to before, all with no warning. My mother had to rip me out of your grasp while I kicked and screamed. I know exactly how hard that day was.”
You turned away from Peter and folded your arms, glaring at his wall while hot tears streamed down your face. You had been trying to avoid this conversation in fear of how it would go. Fear he didn’t wait after all when you had turned down every boy who approached you in the past ten years because they didn’t amount to Peter. The fears were feeling very real in the moment and it overwhelmed you.
“Why did you kiss me?” He asked quietly. You looked at him over your shoulder and saw that he was crying too.
“Something inside me just told me I had to.” You shrugged slightly. “I had to give you something to make sure you wouldn’t forget me.”
“I could never forget you.” Peter said assuredly. “You don’t forget your first love.”
“I guess you don’t, do you?” You smiled softly and wiped your tears on your hoodie sleeve. “I loved you before I knew the meaning of the word. But I didn’t really need the meaning, looking back. The feeling was enough. Feelings for you.” You looked at him shyly. “Feelings that told me I needed to kiss you before I lost the chance. I guess that’s what happens when you’re 7 and in love with your best friend.”
“Well, I’m 18 and in love with my best friend. What happens then?” Peter declared, tired of beating around the bush. You turned to him and tugged your sleeves over your hands.
“Peter, what?” You whispered.
“That kiss you gave me was my first kiss.” He admitted.
“Mine too.” You said simply.
“It was also my last kiss.” He continued. You opened your mouth and shut it, taking on the weight of what he was saying.
“Mine too.” You breathed. You and Peter stared at each other, looking at the face of the best friend you’d fallen in love with, the one you’d always been in love with. You swallowed as you prepared to ask Peter the answer to a question you asked him when you were 7. “Did you-“
Peter cut you off by pressing his lips to yours, holding your face in place with his hands. You put your hand on the back of his neck and kissed him back, feeling a tear fall down your cheek as all your fears dissipated. Peter pulled away and rested his forehead against yours.
“Yes.” He mumbled against your lips. “I waited.”
1 month ago
“That’s how it started. We were only together about 9 months before he disappeared.” You told Steve. “You know, I still go home every night and hope he knocks on my door. I always expect him to burst through the door, his flannel flowing behind him like a cape and just pick me up and kiss me. He’d thank me for waiting and I’d tell him it was nothing, that I was happy to do it, because he was worth it.”
“You know, I used to think you were stubborn. But I get it now.” Steve looked at you fondly. “That’s a love worth waiting your entire life for. What I don’t understand is how you sat in that chair for 5 years and never told us that story. Why wouldn’t you say something?”
“Because it’s ours, and it’s all I have left of him.” You smiled sadly. “I don’t want to share it and make people sad, because it’s not a sad story. To me, it’s the greatest love story of all time.”
“We’re gonna get them back. One way or another, we’re gonna fix this. I promise you, I’ll do everything in my power to reunite you guys.” Steve said definitively.
“Why?” You asked him.
“Because I don’t want your story to end like that. You’re 23. I can’t sit back and watch you sit on the bench for the rest of your life, waiting for somebody to come home. I’m gonna bring him home. All of them.” Steve declared.
“How?” You asked. It had been 5 years already and no progress was made to get them back.
“I have a friend I need to talk to. You’re coming with me. Come on.” He stood up and held his hand out. You looked him up and down before smirking and taking his hand.
Present Day
Since you helped bring the Avengers together to set the Time Heist in motion, Tony decided it was only fair to let you help out in the final battle with Thanos. He leant you an Iron suit that you were currently using against a slew of space dogs. The more you fought off, the more came to attack you. It didn’t help that your heart was beating out of your chest knowing that Peter was somewhere on the battle field. You didn’t know how long you had been fighting, but your arms ached with every movement. You sucked in a sharp breath as a space dog lunged at your uncovered face.
You were about to cover your face when you felt something attach to your suit from the back. Before you could react, you felt a tug and flew through the air. You landed in somebody’s arms and saw the battlefield upside down as they dipped you, just like in the movies. They brought you back up and you were suddenly face to face with Peter Parker.
“Is my damsel in distress?” His Queens accent filled your ears as your eyes fell on his smirk.
“Peter?” You said breathlessly, eyes filling with tears at the sight of your boyfriend who you hadn’t seen in 5 years.
“I think so, unless my dust particles reconfigured into Zooey Dechannel.” Peter said sarcastically, making you erupt in laughter as the tears fell down your face.
“Peter!” You squealed, throwing your arms around him and hugging him as tight as you could. His new metal suit made it different, so you restarted to running your hands through his hair, trying to touch any part of his skin that you could reach. In the distance, Steve saw the two of you embracing and smiled to himself.
“Hi.” He laughed in your ear, appreciating all the affection. In his mind, he had seen you just a few hours ago. He didn’t register how much this meant to you. You buried your face in his neck and took in his scent.
“You smell like a new car.” You laughed in happy surprise, looking him up and down to take in his appearance. He looked exactly as you remembered, every freckle and hair in the same place.
“It’s the suit. Mr. Stark made it for me.” Peter said excitedly.
“Its beautiful.” You breathed, not taking your eyes off his face.
“Thank you! I haven’t actually seen it yet but it feels really cool.” Peter said as he looked at his hands. He was obviously to the moonstruck look you were giving him, just happy to be near him. “Mr. Stark got really mad at me because I snuck on the spaceship after he specifically told me not to sneak on the spaceship but it was a good thing because I helped get rid of the bad guys using the technique we saw in Alien.”
“Wow.” You nodded, just happy to be hearing his voice again.
“And the bad guy was like this half squid, half person who spoke with a British accent even though he’s from space.” Peter went on, childlike excitement filling in the brown eyes you’d been missing for the past 5 years. “Y/n, I don’t mean to overwhelm you, but I’m pretty sure there’s a second Britain in space that we don’t know about.”
“Really?” You humored him, tears of happiness still rolling down your face.
“It was so cool, Y/n. Until I died, anyway.” He laughed. “I wish you could’ve been there.”
“I wish that too.” You cried. “I’ve really missed you, Peter.”
“I’ve missed you too.” He smiled brightly. Your lip began to tremble at how I overwhelmed you were and Peters protective boyfriend instincts took over.
“Hey.” He took your chin between his fingers and tilted your face up. “Listen, I know it’s been five years for you and I’m a fool to even ask. But, by any chance, did you-“
You put your hand on the back of his head and pulled him into a kiss. The feeling of his lips on yours after all those years triggered a waterfall of tears to flow. You wrapped both arms around his neck as he held your waist firmly against his, kissing you as hard as he could. You sobbed into the kiss before pulling away, peppering kisses all around his mouth and jaw.
“Yes.” You smiled as he wiped away your tears. “I waited.”
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