When you finally got the courage to ask your mother if your parents really meant to marry or it was because she got pregnant with me and it took her ages to answer just to fucking deflect and I knew it deep down but gosh was I hoping she would deny it but she didn't and fuck I have been in the way after all. It wasn't depression or me being dramatic it really would have been better if I wasn't born I'm the reason why they lived such a shitty life and have been barely above poor while trying to raise me aka the fucking disappointment when they could have lived better lives with other people and fuck hell man.

Never wished to never have been born more than now.