The Smoke in my Lungs
Jason breathes in deeply as he leans against the railing of the fire escape, cigarette between his fingers. Thick Gotham air curls down his throat. He’s probably on one of the few fire escapes in Gotham that would hold his weight with risk or rust.
A necessity when you know vigilantes (and annoying acrobat almost brothers) who’d rather climb through a window than a flight of stairs.
He looks down at the cigarette in his hands, the tip dull in the darkness without a slow burning ember.
Of course it is. He didn’t light it. He never does.
Jason has smoked exactly one cigarette since his miraculous return. Some shitty hotel room in Turkey. Barely a month after the pit, and it had thrown him right back.
One inhale had left him shaking and sobbing in his closet for half a day, the taste of ash and smoke thick on his tongue.
The first thing he’d tasted when he’d woken. Ash, then darkness, then the pit, then… ash again.
Fire licked at his skin, wreckage a crushing weight on his chest, he couldn’t breathe, Bruce! Please! He can’t breathe, oh god he’s gonna-!
“Those’ll kill you y’know?”
Jason’s eyes snap up, spotting dark hair falling around the face dangling upside down in front of him.
“Dick.”
Nightwing smiles and flips down from fire escape above him to landing gently next to him, “No names in the masks,”
Jason smirks at him, “Who said I was using your name?”
Nightwing rolls his eyes, “Sure.”
“Whatdya want, dick?” Jason says, turning back out to the city, he doesn’t let his shoulders drop though, unwilling to hear it from Wing.
“Oh just stopping by, Red Robin’s gonna be rolling through soon, we’re working together tonight, figured he could just do a swing by. Thought I’d stop in while I waited.”
“Well, Nightwing,” Jason glared at him, “as a completely regular, normal, civilian, I appreciate the concern, but you can leave now.”
Nightwing opens his mouth to snark back, only to be cut off by a piercing siren going off a few blocks away. Both their heads snap to it.
“You better get that, Nightwing, civilian safety and all that,” Jason says with a small smirk.
Nightwing scowls at him, already backing up towards the railing, “I better see you at Sunday dinner,” he jumps to the railing, balancing for a second before tipping backwards.
“Farewell good citizen!” Nightwing shouts back as he swings across the next roof. Jason spots a second caped shadow join him in the distance. Tim finally caught up then. Good for him.
Jason crushed the tip of the unlit cigarette into his ashtray, turning to go inside.
He closed the window behind him, sighing into his empty apartment.
And smoke still filled his lungs.
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So in my class we name our glue sticks to stop the kids losing or mistreating them - they're much less likely to lose a glue lid if you're shouting "oh no, Alfred's been decapitated". It's fun.
Now, I'm a big batfam girlie ✨ so naturally I named all our glues after these characters. We have Richard and Bruce and Stephanie and Barbara etc. you see the point.
Recently, the first glue stick ran out. It had to go in the bin so unfortunately it "died", and you'll never guess which glue stick was the first to die...
It was Jason.
You could not conceive the sound I made as I had to throw Jason in the bin as all the children shouted things like "Jason's dead" and "noooo Jason!"
Worst things worse, I couldn't even explain how ironic that was that Jason, the second robin, was the first glue to go!
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Tim Drake is so funny to me as an Icon because Starlin wanted to kill the idea of child sidekicks,of Robin as a light. He wanted to kill the hope and joy of him. Wanted to slaughter the importance and responsibility of having someone relying on you,of having a child to come home to. And he was allowed to kill Jason,was allowed to kill Robin and then not even a year later Wolfman went "Here's a Robin so in love with the idea and responsibility of Robin that Dick Grayson imprinted himself on his brain and Tim hasn't stopped thinking about it since." And he became the Robin that can't stop being Robin and LMAO fuck you Jim Starlin,I'm glad you're here to see it.
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