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#damian being damian
Damian: I swear, no matter how long I've been friends with people, there's always someone who's surprised that I'm left handed. Jason: You're left handed?!? Damian: Damian: *Punches a wall*
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minty364 · 2 months
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DPXDC Prompt #61 Part 4
Danny woke up to a stream of sunlight on his face. The room was just as rich as he remembered, he stood up and stretched a bit before he heard a knock at the door.
It was Alfred bringing him a change of clothes, “Breakfast is ready, Master Danny. You can find the dining room down the hall to the left.” the old butler smiled at him. 
“You don’t have to call me Master, Alfred, I’m not your Damian.” Danny said, turning around to address him.
“Ah, yes, however you are still Master Bruce’s son, even from another world.” The butler gave him a cheeky smile.
Danny shrugged and headed to the bathroom to get changed. Once he was decent again, he headed down to the dining room. 
The room was just as fancy as the rest of the house with a chandelier and ornate vases. 
Danny noticed Damian and a few others already seated at the table. Damian wore what Danny could only assume was his rich kid school uniform. He sat across from Damian who made a small ‘Tt’ and turned away from him. 
Next to Damian was Tim who put away his laptop once Danny sat down. Tim was wearing a business suit, a dark red colored one. “Ah, you sleep much longer than Damian does, you must have been tired.” Tim smiled at him.
Also seated at the table and wearing a navy blue suit, was Bruce himself. He was drinking coffee and reading a newspaper.
“Stop comparing me to him, Drake, I’m nothing like this imposter.” Looks like Damian still thought he was a clone. 
Whatever, he shrugged it off and filled his plate. 
“I don’t really have a lot of free time,” was all Danny said before he started eating.
Tim kind of watched him for a minute, he looked kind of shocked for a second, “You’re eating meat??” 
Ah so that was another difference between them, “again, I’m Danny, I’m not Damian.”
Damian scoffed, “So that’s what you call yourself, imposter.”
Danny gave Damian a tired sigh, looks like the him of this universe was a lot more prideful than he was. Danny went through way too much to carry the same, dying and being crown prince of the infinite realms wasn’t exactly something he was born into. Danny was a bit jealous if he was being honest with himself. 
“Damian, please at least attempt to be friendly. Danny is our guest for the meantime.” Bruce said, putting his newspaper down. He then turned his attention to Danny, “I know it isn’t ideal but I think it’ll be best for you to stay here until we can get you to your own world. I’m planning a trip to the Watchtower tomorrow so I can speak with some of my colleagues about the situation.” 
Danny sighed but nodded his head, “I get it, you can’t have two of us running around.”
“Quite, you’re more than welcome to go around the mansion and the grounds, I’d also like to invite you along to the Watchtower but we’d need to come up with a disguise for you, secret identity and everything.” Bruce continued after taking another sip from his mug, “Alfred will still take you out today to get some basic necessities for you. We’ll get you a proper disguise so you're able to go with him.”
Danny nodded again and continued eating. He thought things over as he ate, he technically had a disguise they could use for the Watchtower but Danny was still on the fence on what exactly he’d tell everyone here.
It wasn’t exactly an easy conversation to have, thankfully some more people arrived for breakfast.
Master Post:
Last:
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ghost-bxrd · 1 month
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Headcanon that when Jason so much as says “ow..” on the comms the rest of the batfam immediately assume he must be dying.
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elkscreams · 2 months
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A right of passage at this point
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1alchemistart · 2 months
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dont got much to offer for The Holiday but have these sillies!
happy valentines day :D
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aviolettrose · 27 days
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A fanfic idea:
Bruce was able to rescue Jason before he died, and after this experience, Jason stopped being Robin.
He became afterwards the golden child, he goes to college (with a scholarship), helps out in the city library, teaches children (helps with their homeworks and helps them to study), works part time in a car garage in crime alley, and is a supportive brother.
And it pisses his siblings off.
Because there has to be something fishy because no one, really no one, is that perfect.
And there is something fishy.
He is also Red Hood.
No one knows, and the vigilantes never talk to Jason about "the family business" because he needs to concentrate on his studies and other stuff.
So imagine, Batmans suprise when the JL was able to catch Red Hood.
Someone takes Jasons helmet off in front of Batman, Nightwing, and other members
And Jason, who wears also a domino mask, doesn't look Batman in the face even as he says :
"Hey Dad. I can explain."
And Dick loses his shit, he laughs so hard because, Jason, The golden child, the one who gave up on being a vigilante, who reads to children in the library, is a goddamn crimelord.
Bruce just stands there frozen because wtf Jason?!
And Dick takes selfies with Jason being tied up and calles the other Batkids in because they should definitely not be left out of it.
(Edit: As someone who doesn't really write (or can write good stories), I want to say, feel free to use this prompt for a fanfiction. Just please give credits to me (because I don't know if someone else had also this idea and posted it) and please inform me if you publish something (because I want to read a fanfiction like this too))
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sodamnbored · 18 days
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Damian, entering the living room: Oh, Drake. I didn’t realise you were here too.
Tim, distracted on his phone on the couch: Yeah, best WiFi around. Keeping busy?
Damian, looking in cupboards and chandeliers for acrobatic older brothers: Looking for Dick.
Tim absently, not looking up from Grindr: Mm, me too.
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deadsetobsessions · 3 months
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Damian Wayne was like a duckling. A violent, stab-happy, danger-prone duckling, yes, but a duckling all the same. Which means when Danny almost got stabbed by a sleepy, instinct driven Damian, he was able to wave it off with a laugh. Damian, on the other hand, stared in horror at the butter knife firmly lodged in Danny’s arm.
“PENNYWORTH!” Danny jerked back at Damian’s scream. “RICHARD! FATHER!”
God damn, the kid had a pair of lungs on him. Danny’s wince was interpreted as pain to Damian, who gently grabbed his injured arm and started to pull him towards the kitchen’s marble island.
Danny blinked, non plussed as his hearing picked up a thundering of feet as the present family members scrambled towards Damian’s distress call.
“Wait, Damian, I’m fine. It’s-”
“You have been impaled, you imbecile! Had it been any of the other simpletons, they would have-!”
“Ouch.” Danny put his other hand in mock hurt over his slow-beating heart. He literally doesn’t care about the butter knife. He’s just impressed there was enough force in there to impale him. “Are you calling me names now? After- gasp- stabbing me?”
Before Damian could reply, the beginnings of regret, remorse, and guilt on his face, Alfred, Dick, and Bruce burst into the kitchen.
“What happened?!”
“My word, master Danny!”
“What is it?!”
“I’m fine. It’s like a small stab. Not even a big stab. I’m good.”
Dick paled, seeing Danny’s arm clutched in Damian’s hand.
“That’s- that’s a knife. In your arm. How is that ‘fine’?!”
“What happened.” Bruce asked Damian, gently removing Danny’s arm from Damian’s death clutch.
“I- I did not mean to,” Damian starts, guilt coloring his voice.
“He didn’t,” Danny cuts in. “I startled him and got stabbed for being dumb. I won’t fault him for having a defense mechanism like that, ancient knows what I might do if you guys startled me.”
The awkward silence that settled at his words made Danny twitch awkwardly.
“Uh, so, can I add this knife to my collection? Even if I didn’t get mugged?”
“Danny.”
“Bruce.” Danny stared stubbornly back. With his uninsured hand, he patted Damian on the head. He was going to enjoy the fluffiness before Damian’s guilt was no longer enough to hold him back from snapping at Danny’s hand like a grumpy alligator. Bruce loses, obviously. He’s a teenager who was also an ex-vigilante. Batman’s got nothing on a determined halfa.
“Master Danny, I must insist you refrain from getting stabbed. There is only so much gauze and antiseptic cream in the house.” Alfred returned- huh, when did he leave?- with a med kit.
Danny called bullshit because he knows there’s a whole ass medical bay beneath the manor.
“Sorry.”
“No need to apologize.” Alfred said, promptly beginning the extraction of the butter knife.
“Are you okay?” Dick asked, hovering worriedly. “He- are you…?”
Damian was allowing Danny to ruffle his hair, so…
“Yep, I’m good. This isn’t even on my top thirty most painful stabbings,” and it really wasn’t. That honor was given to the GIW and that one time Jazz accidentally stabbed him with her earrings. “That was pretty impressive, actually. It’s like, a butter knife. The other ones had pointy ends.”
“Do not clump me with those pathetic wastes of spaces. I am naturally superior and would… would never harm you on purpose.” Damian said, getting quiet at the end like he was trying to plead to Danny to believe him.
“Of course not. But- if you want help me keep the knife, you can hit me with a mug, it would technically be a mugging.”
The pun got the desired effect. Damian leaned away with a disgruntled look and Dick stopped hovering as close in order to let out a small cackle.
“Done.”
“You should go get changed, kiddo. We’re going to see Tim’s photography at the Gotham Gallery today.”
“Oh, for real?” Danny patted Damian’s fluffy hair one last time, pushing away from the counter. “Oh, I’ll clean up here first and-”
“That will not be necessary,” Alfred scolded, a mop somehow already in his hands. “Please see to it you are prepared for the day.”
“Thanks, Alfred. Can I keep the knife.”
“Very well.”
“Sweet. See you guys later?” Danny pranced off after seeing the nods.
——
“He’s… he got stabbed a lot. Before us, I mean.” Dick tapped a furious rhythm onto the counter. “Not that we’ve stabbed him until now but even once is concerning for a civilian.”
“He was used to it.” Bruce replied.
“Perhaps we should join Todd in his endeavor and ensure that his worthless tormentors are permanently out of the picture.”
“God, he said top thirty. He was counting.”
Damian silently withdrew a kitchen knife.
“No murder with my quality chef’s knives, Master Damian.”
“Tt.”
“Master Jason follows the same rules. Now, out of the kitchen. I may be old, but I remember the last time master Bruce and master Dick stepped foot in here and I will not have a repeat.”
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Jason: What's got you both upset? Finally agree on something?
Damian: Yes, but not important, Father has decided to crack down on the "no swearing" rule
Tim: Some situations deserve a fuck or two ya know?
Jason: Just ignore him. That's what everyone does when he gets uptight about stupid rules
Dick: No no, he's been like this a few times before. Here's what you do; wait until he's doing his "I am the scariest thing in Gotham" interrogation bit. Then hit him with the silliest "Gee Golly" you can manage. He'll be begging you to swear by the end of patrol
Tim: Dick you're a genius!
Dick: Don't spread it around. It'll ruin my cover
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catpriciousmarjara · 7 months
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Getting a PHD literally anywhere else: Wow! Congratulations! What a great achievement! Amazing!
Getting a PHD in Gotham: Wow! Amazing! You're now on several Government, Civilian, and Bat watchlists.
So if any of the Wayne kids get a PHD, then the entirety of Gotham would be squinting at them suspiciously. They're rich, so resources, and most likely already insane with all the shit they pull.
What I'm saying is if Jason went and got himself a Doctorate in Literature, the whole city would anticipate the appearance of his villainsona called the Dead Poet(emphasis on the dead) or Bookkeeper or something else similarly nerdy and themed like that for sure.
I just know that it would turn into some Gotham inside joke with memes abound, and everytime Jason would, I don't know, give more funding to the neglected Arts Departments in Gotham University, or go to a school for read alongs to encourage kids to read, Gotham social media would go crazy and be like:
"The Dreaded Villain Dead Poet Reads Alice in Wonderland to Children! How Despicable!"
"Villain Dead Poet Lambasts Government on Banning Books! Leads Librarians to Riot!"
"Dead Poet Ramps up his Villainy by Establishing Educational Programmes in Crime Alley! Uplifting the Poor! What a Dastardly Villain!"
"Dead Poet Goes on Live Ranting About his Favourite Books! Favourite Author is Jane Austen! Is this the Feminist Agenda?"
And so on! It's a meme that refuses to go away. His siblings actively participate, and make the situation worse.
Dick held an online Gotham Villains and Anti-Heroes Poll and Dead Poet came out on top, over Red Hood. Jason is an actual Gotham crime boss, but his crowdfunded villainsona is more popular. No he's not salty about it at all.
Duke would create a montage of Dead Poet sightings.
Stephanie would make a Dead Poet meme compilation.
Tim would arrange Wayne Enterprises to donate to local libraries after allegedly being threatened by the heinous villain Dead Poet. (Jason did ask Tim to do that but not like that)
Barbara created an extremely popular Villain Watch account for Dead Poet.
Cass tweeted out Jason's favourite books as the villain Dead Poets reading list telling people to avoid them 'wink wonk', causing a massive uptick in the sale of those books ala Bigolas Dickolas.
Damian of all people tweeted out a pic of Jason playing with Alfred the cat accusing the evil villain Dead Poet of attempting to kidnap his cat.
And thats not to mention all the shenanigans they pull in their batsonas.
God bless Gotham and it's home grown, organic, not even remotely ethically sourced, free range chaos.
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Jason: Make no mistake. Not only am I party rocking, but I am also in the house tonight. Tim: But are you shuffling? Jason: Everyday. Damian: What language are you two speaking??
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violent138 · 21 days
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Damian: "Red Hood has a pretty severe concussion. What do I do?"
Tim: "Extraction's still ten minutes out, just keep him talking."
Damian, urgently pressing the comm: "I don't want to talk to him, he's even more insufferable than usual."
Jason, lying on the ground, eyes closed: "That's funny Junior, because head trauma's the only thing that makes you bearable."
Damian, to Tim: "I'm leaving. It won't be the first time we've had a closed casket."
Tim, groaning disgustedly: "Robin--ugh, seriously, just stay there and keep him awake."
Damian, seething even more when he sees Jason's smirk: "Fine."
Jason, cracking open one eye: "Aww, are you concerned about me?"
Damian: "Shut up. The only thing I'm concerned about is our family's reputation after your public wipeout on that stupid motorcycle."
Jason:
Damian: "Are you still awake?" *kicks him* "Todd?"
Jason, grinning: "You said our family."
Damian, furious: "I didn't. You've lost more brain cells than you could afford."
Jason: "Wait 'till Tim hears, I think he'll want a group hug. Bruce is probably going to get emotionally constipated. Dickie would probably cry--"
Damian, panicking as he hears the Batmobile get closer: "Stop. Do not tell him--"
Jason: "You better erase every single fucking video of me crashing then."
Damian: "You have a deal."
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melmov · 1 month
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I cast: curse of the eldest (can’t ask for help)
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ghost-bxrd · 5 months
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Prompt:
After Jason’s resurrection he finds that his body works… wrong somehow.
Some days he forgets to breathe until he wants to say something and finds there’s no air in lungs. Other days his body goes eerily cold until someone points out that his lips are blue and he needs to warm up.
And some days his heart stops beating in his sleeps.
It’s fine, really. It always starts again eventually a short while after he wakes up. And yeah, of course it was a bit scary the first couple times it happened but it’s not like his resurrection and Pit-dip came with an instruction manual, so this is probably pretty normal stuff, all things considered. He is kind of the definition of “undead”.
The real trouble starts when he forgets to mention those little details to the Batfamily when he stays over for the night.
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batbabydamian · 6 months
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a future Stephanie and Damian!
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Batgirl (2009) #7 lol
lil future design inspos: Future State Steph design by Dan Mora, and Damian’s painted nails panel from Batman Beyond (2016) #45
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undertheredhood · 8 months
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any dc character: *confessing something about their past they kept hidden out of fear/shame*
their batfam bff who had already known for a while and is now desperately trying to hide that they knew the truth this entire time: “oh, wow! that is so crazy, i am so sorry you had to go through that.”
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