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Alec Hardison (hacker/tech genius, cinnamon roll, does NOT like heights but can deal with them if he must)
@pomrania writes:
The ones I'm uncertain about are Nate Ford and Hardison. Hardison mostly because there's very little tech for him to use, thus his master-class specialty isn't available and he'd have to be judged on more "normal" factors (although he's also a skilled grifter).
@r0sequarks writes:
Hardison is definitely dead. He is not meant to go into the field alone. His grifting style is notable for getting him dangerously in over his head on multiple occasions. Plus, he’s out of his element with nothing to hack. My boy’s getting eaten. Probably at the shaving incident since I doubt he’d take the crucifix.
@darthlordcommie writes:
Hardison: He's a hacker, he gets a bit too smug, his skill set is useless. Slurp slurp.
I get where you all are coming from but like okay. Let's break this down.
Yes, it is true that Hardison's fatal flaw is overconfidence and getting a bit too impressed with himself. Yes he overcomplicates things. He's a genius and he knows it and that gets him into trouble. But this is not going to be a problem for him in Castle Dracula because:
Hardison is the member of the crew with a healthy respect for the supernatural
(Yes, yes, Parker believes in the supernatural, but that's not quite the same. Parker believes in the supernatural the way she does everything else - idiosyncratically.)
I'm surprised to see doubt that he'd accept the crucifix. Hardison, again uniquely among the Leverage crew, is godfearing. He's the one getting qualms about stealing from a church - not Nate, whose church it is. There is no way he'd refuse a crying old lady bestowing a religious artifact on him for his protection - his Nana raised him better than that. Not only is he a Polite Young Man, but there are some things you don't mess around with, and divinity is one of them.
And vampires are another! Hardison has two features that are going to offer him a lot of protection: he's extremely culturally literate and he's afraid of things that are scary. The others approach Dracula as a Mark; Hardison is the most likely to approach him as a vampire. If he were able to just nope on out of there he would. Hardison does not want to be here, doing this.
The cultural literacy is a bit of a double edged sword, because he might be operating off the wrong set of vampire lore, and if he comes in visibly armed against vampires Dracula will perceive him as a threat and kill him. This is where his tendency to go too far comes in - given the choice he would enter the Castle with like three braids of garlic around his neck and other unsubtle markers, and this would get him immediately killed. But if he only realizes he's in a vampire story after he becomes a prisoner, when he lacks the ability to outfit himself, then his knowledge (and fear) becomes his best weapon of defense. He can't get overcocky because there is nothing in here to inspire him own confidence. He'll be too terrified to be smug. And that's what's going to keep him alive.
One of you speculated that Nathan Ford is the most like Jonathan Harker of the crew. I couldn't disagree more. Hardison is. He's intelligent, assured and proud of his own skills, afraid of things that are scary, inclined to shit-eating when the situation permits it, young and idealistic, madly in love with his autistic wife, [century of your choice] up to date with a vengeance, a polite and sweet-faced young man, godfearing, skilled in encryption and decryption, constantly referencing his favorite media, logical and methodical, researches everything, and is afraid of heights. There's a reason I make Jonathan's catch phrase "Age of the Clerk, baby!" The novel Dracula is a technothriller and to the extent it's applicable in the late Victorian context, Jonathan is the Drac Attack Pack's hacker. And not just because he hacks Dracula's head off. Who presents the Documents and Backstory at the beginning of every Leverage episode? Hardison does.
All this to say, provided it takes him long enough to figure out that Dracula is an actual literal vampire that he can neither nope out nor arrive in full Blade cosplay, I think Hardison's stay in the Castle plays out almost exactly like the novel as written. As I said, I very much don't think he'd refuse the crucifix, so he won't die shaving. He'll absolutely panic like a rat in a trap before calming down. When he doesn't get cocky he does in fact know how to play a Mark quite well, so he can play the game with Dracula well enough for his fear and discomfort to be funny. He'll know he's going to die and act accordingly. He's gonna be real unhappy about that sheer drop but he will brave it as a matter of life and death. He is not going to go out to get devoured by wolves when he has the option of not doing that. There's nothing to hack and a decided lack of orange soda, but you can't have everything.
I seem to be in the minority here, but I actually do think Alec Hardison can survive Castle Dracula
Lennie represented his and George's friendship, and that value died with him. It's why he doesn't go and get the farm with Candy and maybe Crooks. It's why he gives up and decides to be like the rest everyone has seen when he kills Lennie. He doesn't have to give up on the dream, but he does, because it's not in full fruitation without Lennie there by his side saying, "George gonna let me tend the rabbits!"
That's why I love Of Mice & Men and the value that it represents. And the value that it represents is...
Obama, Clinton & Bush speaking about Haiti disaster relief, right before they stole all of it.
Bush: "The most effective way for Americans to help the people of Haiti, is to send money. That money will go to organizations on that ground who will be able to effectively spend it." "I know a lot of people wanna send blankets or water, just send your cash. One of the things the President and I will do, is make sure your money is spent wisely."
And then, they stole it.
Crooks. All of [Them]
How do you feel about hearing this in today's time, especially given what you know about Haiti's missing children, missing money, the Clinton Foundation & the Clinton's VERY close relationship with Jeffrey Epstein and Ghislaine Maxwell? 🤔
Eliot Spencer (ex special forces, chef, private bodyguard/wet work man, very good at identifying a wide range of things by their minute but distinct differences)
@pomrania writes:
Eliot is a skilled grifter (specialized in making himself seem not a threat) AND a skilled fighter (and more importantly he knows when NOT to fight) AND he has a ridiculous variety of sundry skills he's highly talented in, so there's prolly like twenty different ways he could survive.
@r0sequarks writes:
Eliot…it comes down to whether he tries to fight Dracula (look, worlds best hitter isn’t helping, he loses a straight fight) or if he knows better to play dumb/try to run. Depends on why he’s there and what he wants; I think he’d wise up and get out of there in most cases but baby murder could drive him to fight and die.
@darthlordcommie writes:
Elliot: It all comes down to whether Elliot clocks how dangerous Dracula is in terms of a fight. If he realizes that there's no way he'll be beating Dracula in a fight, he'll slip out the window. He's weak to the trance, but he's very quickly on top of things, and if he can make it to the wolves, he's got survival training, he can make it past the wolves.
@siredgarconanshakespeare writes:
#my money is that eliot could TOTALLY do it #but we shall see
Eliot Spencer is definitely smarter than he looks, acts, or our best testing indicates. He can punch his way out of any situation that a way can be punched out of. He's the second best actor in the crew after Sophie. He speaks Romanian I'm sure - heck, he probably Knows A Guy. He has opinions about Dracula's cooking. He's not worried about wolves, he's comforting those poor horses (Certified Horse Girl powers). If anyone can charm a vampire babe, he can. He puts up with Hardison on purpose. Eliot Spencer has every skill he could possibly want to survive Castle Dracula.
HOWEVER. He is the character I am most immediately sure is not making it out.
I think he does recognize the threat. He can probably understand the warnings being shouted at him and understands that the key to survival is being underestimated, which he is very very good at. I think he will recognize that even he cannot punch his way through a master vampire in his own stronghold. I think he could make it past ordinary wolves through his own prowess but also his understanding of and respect for the natural world; I think he will fare less well against wolves that are being supernaturally commanded to kill him specifically - but again I think he will recognize that and not try that route. As you say, he knows how to fight and when not to fight. That's not the issue.
Eliot is not going to make it for one reason and one reason alone, which is that Dracula just so happens to have his personal kryptonite: Children In Peril.
Eliot can think strategically. He can unassume with the best of them and stay in character, fly under the radar. He can do whatever he needs to do to survive. But not when there's a child in danger. The minute kids enter the picture, Eliot goes off the rails - and that's when he has a crew counting on him. But alone? In Castle Dracula? With baby eating monsters and only his own life on the line? (And we all know he considers himself both expendable and beyond redemption).
When the job is Stay Alive I think he can do it. But from May 16th on the job becomes Kill Dracula, and I don't think he can do that. And even if he can go back to strategy-and-survival mode, knowing that the first child is past saving, the minute he sees Dracula heading down the wall with his baby-snatching sack, he's going in for the kill, never mind this is a fight he can't win. Jonathan wishes for a gun to shoot Dracula off the wall; Eliot doesn't use guns, so instead he'll throw a whole Eliot at him.
And that is why Eliot Spencer can not survive Castle Dracula