#college Namjoon au | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

explicit-tae · 1 year

Text

Unusual Suspects

You were always told that the internet wasn't a safe space and to be careful who you were talking to. Namjoon, your crush of years, was someone you thought was a safe haven - until you realized he wasn't the man you adored but instead a catfish pretending to be him. Now, said catfish is determined to ruin your life and the life of your childhood best friend, Taehyung, for their own sick pleasure.

Warning: yandere themes, catfishing, blackmailing, coercion, namjoon x reader, sexting, sextoys, squirting, fingering, sexual enhancement, voyeurism, cursing, reader is naive of course, fingering, nipple sucking, creampie, backshots, oral (f receiving), humiliation kink, blackmailing,

Word Count: 6,856

@bloodline1632 @darkuni63 @seokjinkismet @castlewolfsbane

'I always thought you were beautiful.'

Your smile slowly widens as you read the message on your phone.

Namjoon was - in your eyes - the man of your dreams. He was the definition of tall, dark and handsome. Perfect smile with the same perfect set of teeth. Dimples cheeks so deep, you swear you could probably cuddle in them - of course not literally. Overall, Namjoon was the whole package. He was intelligent, studying English at a neighboring university.

You began speaking with him around three months ago. You were already too timid to introduce yourself when you met him officially three months before that at a party (via your best friend, Taehyung). They weren't close, friendly acquaintances at best.

When you got a message from an instagram account claiming to be Namjoon, you were over the moon. The account had several hundred followers and many pictures that you never questioned if it was him or not. As the both of you spoke often, you received pictures from Namjoon personally - pictures of him at museums or taking walks at parks.

You weren't opposed in sending your own pictures of you visiting museums, as well, or strolling through gardens or frequenting cafes and bookstores. Namjoon was a good conversationist. There was never a dull moment when they both of you were immersed in your conversations about life and any and everything.

The intimate pictures came recently, Namjoon sending one first. A picture of him laying down, clothed bulge on display. The sight of it makes your mouth water and thighs clench. You were hesitant to send your own pictures, but you do. You were self-conscious about your body. You never were sure if you had the flat stomach, decent size breast and butt. However, sitting and dwelling on it would do nothing but make you insecure so you sent the picture.

You didn't regret it when Namjoon sends a flood of messages claiming that you were beautiful, comparing your beauty to goddess and even angels. You were flattered and it causes you to send even more pictures - each one becoming more explicit and raunchier.

It didn't stop at pictures. He'd send you videos of him, claiming that your beauty was what caused him to touch himself. He'd send you videos of him pumping his cock in the camera, heavy breathing in the background. He asks you to do the same and when you do, you feel unsure. You never touched yourself on camera; and even if you, you'd never send it to anyone.

Vaginas weren't appealing to you. You didn't enjoy touching yourself without a toy because of the wetness it caused, but for Namjoon you would. The sensation was weird at first but knowing that Namjoon would enjoy your videos doesn't cause you to stop. You plunge your fingers in and out of you, breathing deeply until you're moaning his name.

Each video session you sent one another, you became more comfortable. You appeared naked more often than not, nipples erect and more willing to add your face into said videos - even if Namjoon never did.

You were hesitant to tell Taehyung. He has been your best friends since childhood and any crush you had he never approved of. When you'd attempt to date, he'd claim that he was a male and understood how males worked. He'd never stopped you from dating but wasn't one to not say "I told you so" when the boys you chose weren't who they said they were.

Taehyung had caught you one night. The both of you live together in an apartment a few blocks away from the University you attended. You were careless this time. Taehyung being one of your closest friends, he didn't care much for personal space. He'd walk in on you while you showered and speak to you as if nothing was wrong. He'd walk around in his underwear and even walk into your room without as much as knocking. There had been many times Taehyung had caught you masturbating - this time it felt more humiliating because you were recording.

Taehyung wasn't going to let it go until you told him who you were sending those videos to, so when you did, you can see the glint in his eyes. He wasn't thrilled about you sending pictures to Namjoon, but you were a grown woman. You could do whatever you wanted and what you were doing wasn't illegal. Besides, Namjoon was a good guy unlike the others you were interested in.

You and Namjoon never spoke on the phone, nor spoke face to face - even though Facetime. You tried, but it failed each time. Namjoon claimed to never have the time and you were understanding - Taehyung not so much. But you were adamant about Namjoon being who he says he was. He posted regularly on his instagram and on his stories - the bike rides were your favorite.

'Do you like the gift?'

The message reads.

'I can't wait to see you ride it.'

You only agreed in riding the sex toy Namjoon had sent to you if you could do it on facetime. You had called and was surprised that he answered. It was dark but you could see his dimples even in the dark. Namjoon turns the camera to his exposed cock and you felt compelled to ride the cock he sent; your mind fantasizing that it was him you were riding.

Your pussy clenches around the dildo, juices sliding down the shaft of the large cock you rode. You moan each time your crash down on it - Namjoon's muffled moans in the background as you do so. He's currently pumping his cock roughly, eyes stuck on your tight pussy.

You moan his name loudly, not caring if Taehyung was home and could hear you. He would surely never let you live this down, but you were determined to cum with Namjoon.

You do cum, juices flooding out of you, and you release one last high pitch moan.

Taehyung does indeed laugh at you, making his own high-pitched moans imitating your own.

Taehyung begins to miss you. You were his best friend, someone who would always be there when he needed you. He took your time for granted. You had boyfriends and lovers, sure, but they never took up much of your time.

Namjoon, however, had. You'd often be on your phone when you were home, eyes glued to the screen completely. Your signature movie marathons were interrupted when the notification from your phone went off. You'd be smiling ear to ear and suddenly, he was second place.

You and Taehyung couldn't as much as play Mario Kart without you pausing to send a message to Namjoon and now, you were working his nerves. You were always his number one girl - hell, his number one person. As much as he had girlfriends, he'd never let them come between your friendship. His former girlfriends never understood that you were his best friend and came first - maybe that's why he was single now.

"We need to talk." Taehyung pipes up one day during dinner. You were both eating burgers and the constant sound of your phone going off was driving him irate.

You furrow a brow at Taehyung but nod.

"Are you sure you're speaking with Namjoon?"

You stop chewing. You turn towards him on the couch and stare for a few moments.

"Don't give me that look, Y/N." Taehyung rolls his eyes. "You said you never seen in face during these calls."

Maybe Taehyung was being picky and possibly confrontational. However, your well-being was his top concern. There was a possibility that whoever you were conversing with could be a creep using your naivety to their advantage.

"You do this all the time, Tae." You murmur, voice low. You no longer have an appetite.

"Y/N..." Taehyung sighs. He understands that tone in your voice. "I don't mean to hurt you-"

"You think Namjoon could never like me." you shrug your shoulders, biting your lip. "No man can ever like me in your eyes."

"That's not true!" Taehyung exclaims. He places his plate on the coffee table and turns to you fully. "I love you, Y/N. You know this. I just don't want you to be taken advantage of."

Taehyung was no fighter, but if your well-being was compromised, he would. He was a man, after all, and men had sick thoughts. Some thoughts he would never bring to the light, but they remained there, nonetheless. He'd hate to see you in a situation that could bring you to a depressive state.

"I just miss you. I miss us." Taehyung leans back into the couch and releases a sigh. "You're always talking to Namjoon and you never have time for me anymore."

"Aww," you began to smile. "Tae Tae!" you laugh. You lean forward to wrap your friend into a hug. "You missed me this much?"

Taehyung chuckles. "I hate you." he responds, but he returns your hug, nonetheless.

Taehyung was jealous, he'd admit. He'd never felt as if he'd ever lose you to another man before.

But Taehyung understood that one day you'd need to find a partner and eventually, you'd get married and have a family of your own. There would come a time where Taehyung won't be the most important person in your life anymore, and though it'll hurt, he'd have to get over it.

"You know I'd never leave you behind, Tae." you tell him, assuring. You lean back from the embrace. "Do you...think it's Namjoon?"

Taehyung bites his lips. He's unsure himself. A part of him wants to believe that Namjoon is the man you're speaking with. But he was sure this could be an episode of Catfish. You rarely speak to him on the phone, and when you do manage to facetime him, his face is never in the camera.

Taehyung swallows. "Well..." he trails off. "Why don't you ask to meet up?" Namjoon lives in the same city and goes to a neighboring university. Meeting up wouldn't be anything difficult if he is who he claims to be.

"I tried." you nod your head. "He...he says he's busy with school work and-"

"Y/N." Taehyung interrupts. "What did I tell you?"

You roll your eyes and groan out, "If a man wants to see me-"

"He'd make the effort to." Taehyung finishes with a nod. "Now, maybe this is Namjoon. But if you're going to keep fucking yourself-"

You widen your eyes and yelp. "Shut up!" you slap his shoulder.

Taehyung released a loud, deep laugh. "Don't hit me! I'm just saying, Y/N. You can't keep doing this virtual relationship when we live in the same city as the man."

You knew Taehyung was right. There's been many offers on your part to meet up, but they were always shut down. You tried to be supportive and understanding, but it was frustrating.

"Do you think he has a girlfriend, maybe?"

"Please don't put those thought in my head." you groan out, hands on your head now. "I cannot imagine being the other woman, Tae Tae."

Taehying shakes his head. "I'm just curious. Nothing more, nothing less." he assures. He knew what you were when you got into your own head. "Let's go out. It's happy hour."

You snicker. "You don't drink often."

"Duh." Taehyung responds matter-of-factly. "Half off all smoothies. Let's go, we only have about 30 minutes left."

This is what you adored about Taehyung. He was spontaneous in a way. He wasn't like other men and was a nerd at heart. You two had traditions. Every Monday there was a movie marathon you both attended in the living room - you both had later classes and didn't need to work. Wednesdays were considered errand day. Taehyung claimed to hate this day, but he never allowed you to hold a bag from the grocery store after running around throwing everything in the cart.

Taehyung was your best friend and you're grateful that you met him many years ago; and just as grateful that you maintained the friendship even into your adulthood.

"Y/N, open the door!"

You lean against the bathroom door, tears trailing down your eyes at an alarming pace. Your hands tangle in your hair and you're doing everything in your power to calm your breathing.

You're embarrassed.

You're traumatized.

You're disgusted with yourself more than anything.

Taehyung continues to knock on the door in hopes you'd open up to him. He hated seeing you cry. You appeared vulnerable and fragile. But he was your best friend and needed to help you through your pain.

You fingers pull your hair at the scalp while you attempted to drown out Taehyung's knocks and calls.

You were wrong about him - Namjoon. You couldn't face Taehyung now. You were positive that he wouldn't laugh in your face about how you were wrong about him. However, you wish that the ground would crumble up and swallow you whole.

While Taehyung and you were out getting smoothies, his eyes had caught an interesting site. Namjoon wasn't someone that you could miss easily. He was as tall as he was clumsy, and clumsy he surely was. Him dropping three smoothies onto the ground as soon as he got it causes Taehyung to offer help.

Taehyung and he chatted for a few moments, laughing at how clumsy he was. They weren't friends, but they weren't strangers.

That was your moment to enter. Maybe he didn't see you there with Taehyung. When else would you get the opportunity to meet with him? You introduced yourself and Namjoon offers a wide dimpled smile that faded each moment as you began to speak. He was confused - genuinely confused on what you were speaking of.

"You were talking to me?" Namjoon ponders aloud. "I-I...don't think it was me."

You felt hot upon hearing the words. The confusion on his face, mixed with the hesitance in his voice. He was telling the truth. He didn't know who you were in the slightest.

"Hold on!" Namjoon calls, but you sprint out of the cafe. Taehyung follows close behind you.

"Open the door, Y/N. Please talk to me." Taehyung is begging now, pleading with everything in him for you to speak with him.

Taehyung steps back when the door swings open. Your eyes were puffy, and cheeks stained with tears. He steps forward to engulf you in a hug, but you step around him. You make a dash to you into your room, but Taehyung is trailing close behind you. As you try to slam your door, Taehyung pushes his way through. "Ignoring me won't make it go away."

"I don't want to talk." you cry. It was bad enough that you had to deal with the fact that you were dumb enough to believe Namjoon would talk to you. Now, having to face Taehyung - someone who voiced his own concerns about it - was just a slap to the face.

"Y/N. I'm your friend!" Taehyung hisses. He doesn't mean for his words to come off harsh, but he would be damned if he allowed you to be alone in your own self-pity. "Let me comfort you."

And you do. Taehyung doesn't speak when you cry into his chest. He was sure his shirt would be covered in tears and snot by the time you were done, but nothing a little laundry detergent and water could help.

Taehyung rubs your back soothingly when you calm down. He doesn't push you to talk to him right away. He understands your hurt - he only wish he could take your pain away.

"I feel so stupid." you murmur after an hour. Taehyung and you now laid upon your bed, your head on his shoulder. "Namjoon must think I'm a loser."

"He doesn't." Taehyung responds. "He looked concern. I didn't have a chance to speak with him." You were his main concern, but he'll have to get in contact with Namjoon and explain the situation sooner or later.

"You were right." you bitterly scoff. "I showed my body to some creep like a whore."

"Stop it, Y/N. You aren't a whore." Taehyung turns to you. He's glad you aren't crying anymore, but he wasn't going to listen to you insult yourself. "You were catfished. it happens to all of us. Block that person immediately."

And you do. You were hesitant in the beginning. A part of you wanted to believe that the person you were speaking with was indeed Namjoon, but you understood you had to do what was best - which was blocking the catfisher. It shouldn't be anything to question. It was the obvious thing to do, but you can't stop yourself from feeling empty afterwards.

Taehyung on the other hand decided that he needed to keep you at eye level. He didn't wish to smother you - being overly affectionate about your situation would only make you think about the situation more often. But he knew he needed to be there for you as much as you'd let him.

A week thus far had passed, and Taehyung is unsure how you're handling everything. He's sure you're choosing to ignore everything. each moment he'd ask if you're alright, you'd brush him off as if it was obvious that you were indeed alright. "Why wouldn't I be?" you'd ask in response. Why wouldn't you be alright? You were catfished by who the hell knows. This person has your nudes plastered all over their phone. It would be traumatizing for anyone.

Another week passes and you're walking alongside Taehyung to your joint apartment. You're content that he hasn't spoken about the situation. You were glad you had a Taehyung in your life that cares for you, but you needed nothing more than to move on from this situation.

Taehyung presses the buttons to the apartment to unlock it. He twists the door and swings it open. He flicks on the lights and halts in his tracks.

You push around him to enter. Your eyes catch the scene before you and you suddenly feel sick to your stomach.

"Y/N..."

You don't respond to Taehyung. Instead, your eyes are flickering to the countless pictures hanging in the apartment - all of you. The same pictures you sent to the catfisher.

'Who the hell are you?'

The last thing you wanted to do was get in contact with someone you never wanted to speak with again. This same someone could be someone dangerous and deranged.

How the catfisher managed to figure out where you lived to just display countless pictures of you - the same ones you sent to them - was psychotic behavior.

Taehyung had watched you break down one too many times, but this was different. You cried even harder as you snatched all the pictures and crumbled them in your hands. He's unsure what to do - how to comfort you. He's breathing heavily and he's attempting to rack his brain around this situation.

Taehyung asks if you'd like to go to the police station and report this. It was stalking and harassment, surely there was something that could be done. But you turned the idea down. You were humiliated. How could you go to someone and admit that you were catfished in the most obvious way and now being tormented?

Your hands snatch your phone from your bed once you received a notification. It was them.

You read the message while licking your lips in anticipation.

'Hello, Y/N.'

You're pissed now. Why were they responding as if nothing was gone?

'I'm sure you feel stupid.'

They were taunting you now. As if you were some type of joke in their sick game.

'What do you want from me?'

You hesitantly wait for a response. You're unsure if you want to know. The type of material they had on you was enough to ruin your life.

'To embarrass you.'

Your eyes begin to water. You're racking your brain to figure out what you did to deserve this? Did they know who you were personally? You weren't one to be rude to anyone, even when they deserved it. You've gone to restaurants where your order has been royally fucked up and you've never complained. You were polite when needed to. At your own job, the customers and their attitudes were off the wall, however, you could never bring yourself to give the same energy they gave.

'You've allowed me to embarrass you. You've sent me these pictures. They belong to me now.'

Your stomach churns.

'And you also belong to me now.'

Taehyung knocks at your door. He hasn't heard from you in hours. He told himself it was best to leave you be for a while, but a while has passed. He feared you would hurt yourself. No, you never did anything to hurt yourself before, but you've never been through anything such as this.

Taehyung twists your doorknob and pokes his head in. The room is dark, but he can see your body curled on your bed, head faced down. He hears slight sobs, and he feels horrible. "Y/N?" he calls, stepping forward. "Don't cry."

It was easier said than done. It wasn't Taehyung being harassed by a random person who knew a little too much about you.

"We're going to get through this." Taehyung places a hand on your back and begins to rub. "We can go to the police-"

"No." you jolt up and shake your head. You proceed to wipe your eyes. "They h-have pictures and videos and..."

"Sshh..." Taehyung shakes his head. "I understand but-"

"But they own me." you scoff bitterly. "They said...they said I have to do things for them. Him. Them...I don't even know if it's one person or not."

Taehyung furrows a brow. "Do things for them? What the hell do they want?" he hisses.

You begin to cry harder. You wanted to vomit all over the place. You feel your heart begin to break at what your life was becoming.

"Tell me, Y/N." Taehyung's voice becomes louder with authority. "What do they-"

Taehyung hears another notification. It's not your phone, but his own. He looks down at his phone and shakes his head. "I don't understand."

Your eyes watch as Taehyung opens the message and begins to read.

'Hello, Taehyung. You claim to love Y/N and would do anything for her, what are you willing to do to get her out of trouble?'

"What trouble, Y/N?" Taehyung flickers his eyes from his phone screen to you. "You can come to me for anything, you know that, right?"

"I can't-"

"Y/N you can!" Taehyung hisses, but another message comes before he can continue.

'You two are best friends, are you not? How friendly are you?'

"What does he mean?" Taehyung scans your frightened expression.

"He wants you to..." you feel sick, lightheaded. "to...he wants to watch you and me..."

Taehyung's expression turns from confused to puzzled in a matter of seconds at the realization.

'I bet you're asking what I get out of this. I like to see people like you squirm. You don't deserve this, of course, but bad things always happen to good people.'

"There has to be a way to track these people." Taehyung scoffs in disbelief. There wasn't a way they were going to blackmail the two of you.

"I-I tried...I-I-"

"Calm down." Taehyung places a hand on your knee. "It'll-"

Taehyhung's phone rings in his hands. It's the same unknown person and he answers immediately. He was ready to cuss and scream at whoever it was, but they're speaking before him.

"You can do as I say or everyone in your contacts - both of your contacts - will know of these pictures."

Your breath hitches in your throat. You don't recognize the voice, but it appears to be using a face tone either way, possibly through an app.

"If you choose to do as I say, I will send you a link to a livestream."

"L-Livestream?" you choke. Who the hell would be watching?

"Don't worry, only I would be attending."

"What are we expected to do?" Taehyung murmurs.

"You know. Fuck her."

You began to cry.

"You may say you're just friends, but how could you not want to fuck her when your room is exactly besides hers?"

Taehyung's fists clench.

"Do you hear her fucking herself-"

"Stop!" Taehyung hisses. "What do you want? Money?"

"If I wanted money, I'd ask for money." the voice offers a deep chuckle. "I want to see how much of a slut she is."

Your tears are falling effortlessly down your cheeks.

"If she could bare it all for me and she wasn't certain who I truly was, what is she willing to do with someone she's known for years?"

"We don't have to do this."

You're trembling, unable to look Taehyung in the eye. You feel naked before him - and technically you are. You were by no means insecure when it came to Taehyung. He's seen you down to your bra, but that was because you were drunk out your mind. Your intoxicated state had vomited all over yourself, the floor and the surrounding people.

This? This was different. Taehyung had never seen you in lingerie before and you're sure he didn't want to. Your arms were crossed over your chest, the lingerie you wore clinging onto your skin uncomfortably. It was lacy and black, and you're positive that it would be a set you adored if you weren't forced into.

You were shocked by Taehyung agreeing to the terms of the pyscho catfisher. In the beginning, you had concluded he only did so because you were a crying mess at the catfishers words. But when the catfisher had contacted the both of you once more a week later, Taehyung had not gone against his word. Even with the amount of demands they had - you wearing a specific lingerie that you sent to you. They have given both you and Taehyung sexual enhancements - liquid shots that you were instructed to take over 20 minutes ago on a livestream.

You owned a laptop, but Taehyung owned a desktop setup that he was instructed to connect to a larger monitor so the catfisher could comment while being a creep and watching.

You glanced at Taehyung and sniffled. He wore nothing but his boxer and though you never thought about Taehyung sexually, you couldn't help your eyes from wandering. You blamed the sexual enhancement.

A notification sounds from the monitor. Your head snaps to it, reading what the catfisher has written.

'You two are boring.'

Taehyung scoffs. He turns his head towards you once more. "Y/N..."

'We don't have to do this.' But you did need to do this. The threats and harassment were becoming unbearable. If they needed to see you embarrass yourself and possibly ruin your friendship with Taehyung, then so be it.

"You need to fuck me, Tae."

Before Taehyung can react, another comment comes from the voyeuristic catfisher.

'I want to see foreplay. Sex isn't enjoyable without it.'

You gulp. You inhale deeply and exhale slowly. You haven't had sex with a man in almost a year. By the look of Taehyung's underwear, your dildo could not prepare you enough.

'You already took the enhancements. Make this worth your while.'

Taehyung turns to you fully. He's attempted as much as he could to not look at you. He wasn't a pervert - especially to you. He loved you. You weren't the typical fuck to him. "Try...laying down."

You nod your head. You allowed your arms to fall to your sides. Taehyung himself blames the sexual enhancement he took. Had your body always been this inviting?

"W-What are we gonna do?" you murmur to him, laying down on his bed. You feel awkward and wanted to die on the spot.

"Relax." Taehyung responds. He places a hand on your knee and gently rubs it. "I'll never hurt you, Y/N, baby."

You feel the gush rush between your legs. Goosebumps run up your arms and shakingly release a breath. Taehyung's voice could possibly never be this deep before.

"You trust me, don't you?" Taehyung kneels down, brown eyes staring into yours. When you nod your head, Taehyung offers a small smile. "Open your legs."

The lace allows Taehyung to get a glimpse at how wet your pussy was. He grunts lowly, tongue poking out to wet his lips.

Your back arches when you feel Taehyung send a kiss on your clothed clit. You head is spinning - this was your best friend. You could even consider Taehyung to be like a brother, now you're not so sure.

Taehyung rubs his lips against your clothed clit, his cock twitching in his underwear. It's tight and needs to be torn off, but you weren't someone he would fuck into the mattress like a savage. He had to prep you first. Your scent is inviting - it makes his mouth water.

You can feel Taehyung's finger push the lace panty aside. You're fully exposed in front of him now.

Taehyung doesn't hold back. He licks a slow stripe up your clit and watches your reaction. It causes him to lick and suck when he notices you're just as into as he is - this frightens him. Taehyung suckles on your clit - his best friends clit - so savagely that his sucking is echoing off his bedroom walls.

You tell yourself that this is a onetime thing - that this could never happen again. It was the sexual enhancement that has Taehyung so deep into your pussy that you're enjoying it.

Your moans send Taehyung over the edge. He hooks his hands beneath your knees and locks you in place so he could continue to suck on your clit. He watches you, mouth agape and moaning for him so loudly that he's leaking like a teenager in his underwear.

"Tae..." you gasp his name, flinching at the overstimulation. "....fuck."

Taehyung lifts his head and licks his lips. "Are you okay, baby?"

You moan again because shit, Taehyung was sexy. You never thought this man was anything but your cute best friend who enjoyed playing dorky games and even more dorky hobbies. Was this what his former girlfriends experienced?

Taehyung enters two fingers inside of you. He pumps slowly, astonished at how wet and tight you were.

It's amazing that the both of you were forgetting the camera recording the livestream, but you two will blame the sexual enhancement.

"You're so wet, baby." Taehyung hisses, pumping his fingers faster. "So wet and so beautiful."

You groan, eyes squeezed shut. Your legs are quivering.

Taehyung's free hand allows your leg to fall. His hand snatches at the bra of your lingerie and tugs. He needed to suck on your breast - plump and ready. Your nipples are erect for him when he snatches them out and he doesn't hesitate to suck on them.

You can't hide your moans any longer. Your breast was a sensitive area, and Taehyung doesn't slow when he's sucking.

Taehyung's breathing quickens, sweat trickling down his forehead. He can sense that you were close to cumming just from how tight your pussy clenches around his fingers. He couldn't wait to be able to fuck you.

"You're going to cum all over my fingers, aren't you?" Taehyung's sucking extends outside of your nipples. He's biting your breast, appearing completely animalistic, and leaving behind marks and bruises.

"Yes, I'm gonna cum." you nod your head, hips wiggling to get away from the sensation. "Fuck, fuck, fuck." you hiss, eyes rolling to the back of your head.

The sound of the squirt sprouting out mixed with your sudden screams are a perfect melody, perfectly in sync. The bed is wet, as are you and him.

“I’m gonna fuck you." Taehyung hisses, pushing his underwear down.

Taehyung is huge. His cock is sprung, pink and veiny. It was perfect.

Taehyung places the tip of his cock on your clit and groans. "Fuck, baby, you're so sexy." he murmurs, eyes glued on your wet, glistening clit. "Do you want me to fuck you?"

You nod without a thought. If he could finger fuck you into oblivion, you had a wild ride ahead of you.

Taehyung enters you and hisses. There was no time to hesitate. He fucks into you deeply, hands clenching your hips. He lifts your hips so that he has full control to get deeper inside of you.

"Shit." you moan, shaking your head. Your eyes catch on the site, Taehyung so focus on his thrusts that he doesn't notice you observing him.

Taehyung was so beautiful, so caring. You couldn't think of another man that you loved more than Taehyung.

Taehyung bites his lips, eyes flickering to yours. His heart jumps to find your eyes - filled with lust - already on him. "Feels good?" he smirks, nails digging into your skin deeper.

"I love you, Tae." you slur your words, you're positive you could cum again right now.

Taehyung halts his thrusts. "Huh?"

"I love you." you sigh. "Please don't stop." you beg.

You loved him.

Taehyung knows this. Of course you love him. You two were best friends - the bestest of friends.

But this confession of love appeared personal.

"I love you, too, baby." Taehyung flips you around. He slams your face into his bed. Your ass is in the air, and he sends a quick slap upon it before entering you again. "How much do you love me?"

You're unable to give a response with the power in his thrusts. Your hands clench his bedsheets.

"I love you so much, Tae." you moan, eyes squeezed shut. He was fucking too good that you couldn't do anything but say you loved him. You're unsure if a man has ever made you feel as good as Taehyung did - and that was deadly. This was someone you'd had to look at once the sexual high (and enhancement) wore off.

Taehyung groans, hips snapping into you. His right hand slaps your cheek. "Say it again, baby. Say you love me."

You enjoyed being hit, Taehyung notes, you clench around him.

"I-I love you...." you're cumming and moaning uncontrollably.

Taehyung was near himself. You sounded so beautiful; your pussy was amazing. Your body captivates him and he surely did adore you. The sayings were correct - sex with those you loved was far more intimate when it was with someone you loved.

Taehyung shoots his cum inside of you, cursing as he does so. His cum shoots out of you and it drips down your clit and onto his bedsheets.

You fall into the bed, breathing deeply. Your eyelids were heavy.

Taehyung falls besides you and wraps an arm around your waist.

Namjoon hands squeezes the tip of his cock, his eyes are glues to the screen. He came just in time with you and Taehyung, the sight amazing. He continues to eye his screen to see the both of you soundly asleep, forgetting about you livestream show they put on for him.

Namjoon was but a man. People would say he was a sick bastard if he found out what he was doing, but he wouldn't call himself sick. He was just...a man. He had needs like the rest of the men around the world had. Sure, maybe what he was doing wasn't necessarily "human decency" but he couldn't help his self.

Namjoon understood that he had a problem at a young age. He loved to see women in positions such as this - humiliated. Degraded. Helpless.

Namjoon once attempted to get help. He spoke to therapist about his sadism. He didn't want to hurt people, no, but watching and enjoying people be humiliated brough him great pleasure.

Namjoon was a voyeur. He adored being able to sit and attend the sex parties. The gangbangs were his favorite - the sight of a woman being completed used for pleasure brought him over the edge. He understood he was a sick individual, but he was far too deep into this.

Namjoon groans, pumping his cock in his hand at the site of Taehyung pounding inside of you. It was obvious the sexual enhancement had only enhanced the sexual attraction that was already there. Taehyung licked your pussy with such need and desire - only could be done with someone he truly loved and desired.

Taehyung fucks you with such need, almost as if he was waiting for this very moment. Namjoon cums too quickly for his liking, but it wasn't long until he was erect again.

The moans from Taehyung and you were the icing on the cake. You were far into the sex that you forgot he was watching. You should thank him, truly. You were getting the best sex of your life by your best friend - yelling out constant "I love you's". Namjoon was a match-maker, he thinks.

When you fall asleep, Namjoon manages to clean himself. He showers and washes the clothes he had on prior. His mind wanders to the previous weeks. How you had introduced yourself to him and how he had to pretend not to know who you were. You were hurt and the hurt does nothing but turn him on. He remembers the way you ran out of the smoothie shop in pure embarrassment.

Taehyung calls after you, but not before stopping by Namjoon first.

"How do you think she'll handle it?" Namjoon asked, furrowing a brow.

Taehyung shrugs. "She's embarrassed. That was part of the plan."

As Namjoon exits his shower, his phone rings. He strolls back towards his bedroom where his desktop laid, livestream still on. Taehyung was not in site, but you remained asleep on the bed.

Namjoon grasps his phone and hums. He answers. "You're calling sooner than expected."

Taehyung chuckles.

"How does it feel?" Namjoon asks. "To finally fuck Y/N?"

Taehyung groans. "Like heaven." he admits.

Namjoon snorts, rolling his eyes.

Taehyung's plan to get you into bed was a wild one. When the younger man had come to him with the plan, he had laughed in his face. However, Taehyhung remained stoic. He was serious, and Namjoon was intrigued.

Taehyung was no fool to Namjoon's own kinks and fetishes. Who else would be the one to go along with his plan? Sure, Taehyung's plan was a bit insane and time consuming. "Talk to Y/N pretending to be yourself, get her comfortable and then pretend to not know who the hell she is."

It took Namjoon months to get to know you. You were a genuine person, and the wholesome part of him understood what he was doing was wrong. But, the chance to witness you vulnerable had caused him to go along with the sick plan by no one other than your best friend.

"By all means necessary." Taehyung had assured, and Namjoon had delivered.

You were a beauty. You weren't the outgoing type so to get you to become intimate with him wasn't something to be done easily. But Namjoon was persistent. He got you comfortable enough that you bore it all for him - and he had the leverage he needed to break you.

Taehyung had received all the pictures and videos you had sent Namjoon - what he did to them, Namjoon had a clue. But he wasn't one to judge; he did the same.

"What now?" Namjoon sits at his desk. You stirred but didn't wake. "Is the game over?"

Taehyung sighs. "No." he responds. "I haven't compensated you."

Namjoon scoffs. "You don't need to pay me. It was fun."

Taehyung is silent on the other end, so silent that Namjoon checks to see if he had hung up.

"Don't you want to fuck her?"

The question catches Namjoon by surprise. "H-huh?"

Taehyung snorts on the other end.

"Tae, it's not funny." Namjoon hisses. "Stop joking."

'I'm not." Taehyung quips. "Her pussy still belongs to me, Joon-ah. I just want you to...have a little taste." Taehyung voice seemingly darkens, and Namjoon stiffens.

"Is that so?" Namjoon questions.

"Of course. I have to be there, though." Taehyung says. "I'm sure we can come up with another plan for her to let the both of us have her."

"At the...same time?" Namjoon can just feel his cock harden. He never participated in a threesome before and just the thought has him ready to cum once more.

"Yes."

Namjoon licks his lips.

"Okay." Namjoon needs to keep his composure. He couldn't allow his excitement to be exposed at this moment. You were once considered off-limits, but now Taehyung was extending his possession for him. "What's the plan?"

Taehyung clicks his tongue. "I'll get back at you." he says. "I know you're hard again."

Namjoon cheeks flushs. Taehyung knew him too well.

"I'm going to fuck Y/N again and you're going to watch." Taehyung sing-songs. "Give you a little show of just how good my pussy feels. How good it'll soon feel for the both of us."

Taehyung hangs the phone up and like clockwork, he's back into the room. Namjoon gulps. Again, he was but a man - as fucked up as it was.

958 notes · View notes

daechwitatamic · 1 year

Text

My Feet to Follow, and My Heart to Hold || KNJ || Masterpost

(banner by @/itaeewon)

Title: My Feet to Follow, and My Heart to Hold (Complete!)

Rating: NSWF - minors dni

Genre: college!au, roomie!au, angst, s2l, slow burn, eventual smut

Pairings: KNJ x female reader, unrequited KTH x reader

Summary: You know a lot about the many types of love thanks to Kim Taehyung. You love him as the only person you see as “family”, you love him as your very best friend, and you love him as the beautiful, funny man he’s become. But when a twist of fate during your senior year has you rooming with his good friend Kim Namjoon, you just might find that you have plenty left to learn about love.

Lesson One: there are such things as a right way and a wrong way to love and to be loved. Warnings: pov changes - some scenes are namjoon’s pov, conversations revolving around the past loss of immediate family members, language, drinking, angst, a LOT of poetry sorry, eventual smut - sections will have individual warnings

Author's Note: huge thank you to @/kookstempo, @/casuallyimagining, and @/toikiii for beta-ing and listening to me talk about this series a LOT!!! Second thank you to @/jeonqkooks for the gorgeous banner and ALSO for listening to me talk about this way too much lolllll

Series Teaser:

Namjoon peers at you through eyes squinted in suspicion. “How drunk are you?”

You consider this. “Enough that I want to kiss you again, to hell with the consequences. Not too drunk to remember that there would be consequences.”

The playfulness leaves his face; it’s too obvious not to notice. “Consequences like what?”

It’s a challenge. He knows you know it.

“Namjoon,” you say, a little pleading. Don’t.

“Consequences like Taehyung would see?” he presses. His voice has gone hard.

I. Your Wild-Running Heart | 7k

II. My Devotion's Been an Ocean | 7k

III. So I Speak Your Name | 7.5k

IV. Something Has to Change | 7.5k

V. Say What You Mean | 6k

VI. Don't Think About Him | 6k

VII. Supposed to Be With You | 6k

VIII. Nothing Grows Here | 5.5k

IX. Heedless and Willful | 8k

X. So I Follow | 7.8k

XI. All of It | 8K

Extras:

-> The apartment's layout

-> Section II Poetry Analysis

-> Section III Poetry Analysis

-> Section IV Poetry Analysis

-> Section VI Poetry Analysis

-> Section VIII Poetry Reading and Analysis

928 notes · View notes

soft4gguk · 1 year

Text

doom boy | knj

Description: idol!namjoon x reader

Content: pwp. 18+

Word Count: 4.2k

Warnings: dom!namjoon, switch!reader, bratty reader, brat tamer namjoon oof!!, oral (m. receiving), fingering, protected sex, like two little slaps on the cheek (namjoon best boy tho i promise), ass slapping, pet names & use of the word ‘slut’, lil secret relationship?? gasp

Author’s Note: namjoon is bias wrecking me i think that should be excuse enough. sexy nukim performance that nobody prepared us for?? he's just so tall and buff it’s making me sick. @angsttd this one’s for u baby 🫡 here to serve u.

★ masterlist ★

This is a work of fiction. Please respect the members and their privacy. x

doom boy

When Eva’s eyes leave yours mid-sentence, your initial instinct is to follow her gaze, slightly puzzled as to what could’ve possibly caught her attention. Yes, you were in a room full of A-list celebrities, stars if you will, but it’s not like your job didn’t require you to mingle with said stars on the daily. It was hard to star-struck you at this point – not to mention Eva, who had quite literally sent out the invites to this party. She’d been responsible for the guest list, too.

It’s then you realize she’s not star-struck, no. She’s meticulously calculating her next move.

“I didn’t think they’d come,” she says, more to herself than to you.

You smile, though it doesn’t quite reach your eyes. “Ah…”

“Does he know I know? About the two of you, I mean.”

“Yeah. I mean, you did walk in on us.”

She pleads with her eyes, apologetic though she knows there’s no malice behind your words, just teasing. “You’ll make me take that to the grave now, won’t you?”

“If I don’t, the NDA certainly will.”

“He’s walking this way…” her voice is slightly frantic and she stares down at the bar, eyes shooting daggers at the vodka soda she tightly grips to.

“Just him?”

“No. Hobi’s with him.”

“That’s good. Less suspicious that way.”

Eva doesn’t know how it is you’re keeping your composure in times like these. She doesn’t know how you look so effortlessly unaffected by it, by him. It’s almost as if you were expecting it – the magnetic pull with which he seems to be walking towards you.

It’s Hoseok the one that takes the lead, walking right in front of Namjoon and greeting the two of you with a smile.

“Eva, ___!” He’s bubbly and it’s contagious and you can’t help but smile. Eva relaxes visibly, too.

“Hobi, so glad you could make it,” Eva says, turning to Namjoon who catches up, now standing between you and Hoseok. “The both of you!”

“Our pleasure.” Namjoon’s voice makes you crack a smile that he doesn’t see, eyes focused on the way you twirl your straw around your fizzy gin & tonic.

It’s small talk at first, mostly work related, serving as easy disguise, Eva and Hobi your accomplices as you begin to feel a shift in his body, that pull inevitably intoxicating now. It’s hard to fight it, let alone ignore it.

He leans against the counter, eyes looking ahead at the myriad of liquor bottles adorning the wall adjacent to the bar. When he talks, it’s only for you to hear.

“I have to rely on pure coincidence to see you nowadays.”

You smile. “I’ve been busy.”

“Oh, I know.”

“So have you, let’s not point fingers.”

He likes that, the assuredness with which you speak and the way your voice rarely falters, even when he can see the effect his proximity is starting to have on you. Your instincts get the best of you, and you can’t help but be grateful they did because when you finally face him, he’s looking at you, too. That signature smile adorning his face, the one that dimples his cheeks and meets his eyes a little too dreamily; like it was written with the outmost attention to detail by someone that was just as smitten as you. Only you’re not good with words, not in a way that would do the feeling honor at least.

“Are you staying much longer?”

“No.” It’s barely audible, just for him to hear. “You?”

“I’m performing.”

“That’s a pleasant surprise. Maybe I’ll stick around long enough to catch it.”

He smirks, innocently in the eyes of anyone that isn’t you. “I do like to grant you a pleasant time.”

You look away, eyes back on your drink before you’re bringing it over to your lips, a sip of liquid courage that you prolong for more reasons than one.

“Right,” you smile at him, a little too boldly, it almost makes him nervous. “I’m walking away now…”

That smile is still there as you turn around, stealing one last glance at him, the one that lets him know this is not where your evening ends. The one that sees you off with a promise. He tells himself to stop staring, to focus elsewhere the moment your back faces him but he’s too weak to listen to the voices of reason inside his head.

You’re beautiful, tempting, alluring and all of the words in the dictionary his mind scavenges for. Namjoon is good with words and he’d find them all if it meant doing you justice.

He eventually loses you in the crowd, hair falling over your shoulders and back, a tight little dress hugging you perfectly and it’s then he’s made aware the next couple of hours could very well be torture as he stands so close, yet so far away from you.

You pride yourself in two things in this life: your work ethic and your poker face. You’ve come to realize that when working the field you do, the latter comes in handy to power said work ethic. Keeping it professional, but most importantly, keeping yourself unfazed. It’s a wave that ripples until it oozes confidence, another much needed trait in this industry.

Right now, all your assets are failing you.

It’s not like you were expecting the lyrics girl we can keep it low while we do the ride to be accompanied by innocent stage presence but alas, you’re surprised. And yes, it’s pleasant, only unpleasantly so as you try to keep your cool as the entire room rumbles in cheers, screams and what you’re pretty sure are a couple of moans and whimpers here and there. You get it, you do. But you can’t exactly join the frenzied state of the girls and boys alike. No – you’re holding more than just attraction for him. You hold a secret.

He's sexy, confident, head rolling to the beat of the song and God when your eyes scan his body it’s hard for you to actually comprehend his proportions. Taller than most and lean, so lean yet buff. His clothes fit him like they’re painted on and you’re glad you’re not his stylist because you’d be out of a job by now. You can’t help but praise whoever took the executive decision to put him in a turtle neck, though, convinced that not even you could’ve done the job so exquisitely.

You lock gazes, if only for a second and when your mind stops spiralling over the little moment you held you cuss it out. Dismissing it, reminding yourself that this not the time, nor is it the place. Reminding yourself that in reality, cruel as it is, it never is the time or the place for the little dynamic you two have developed over the past three months.

But the moment he comes off stage and his gaze finds yours yet again, this time for longer, you know you’re doomed.

Pun intended.

You don’t mind it. The sneaking around, the fact that he’s essentially taking you home but in two different cars, the extra security and having to seal whatever happens behind closed doors with a signature. None of it matters because the moment you step through the door that he shuts behind you, he’s concealing you from it all, and with every step he takes to close the distance between your bodies, he distances you from reality. At least from the one that involves this messy situation that at times feels like an arrangement.

Not now, though. No. Right now it feels like the very last memory you have of his soft lips on yours, of the way he tasted and the way your breath hitched, electrifyingly so. You crave it now more than ever, but you’re not one to beg – at least not right away.

He takes one last step forward and there it is, the way your body gives you away, a heaved breath leaving you and when it does, your chests touch. He looks down at where your bodies connect for the first time today, eyes finding yours a second after.

“Want you,” he says, voice raspy as his hand wraps around your wrist gently, traveling down until his fingers are intertwined with yours. “Want you since I last had you.”

“Yeah?” He knows the question is rhetorical but he nods anyways, the sigh you let out fanning across his lips.

“Fuck, ___. Let me have you.”

“You can have me.”

The hand that once gently held yours now finds its way tangled in your tresses of hair, exploring for all but a second before he’s tightening his grip, bringing you closer until your lips are touching, but he doesn’t kiss you. Not yet.

“Can I? Will you be good?”

Your lips part, eyes closing, silently begging for a kiss but all it earns you is a harsh pull, his lips now too far away for your liking.

“Yes. Yes, I’ll be good.”

“Why should I believe you? You’re such a little brat, baby. Had to tame it out of you the last time.” He brings his lips to your neck, placing a soft kiss on your warm skin as his palm loses its grip, fingers gently massaging your scalp.

“I promise I’ll be good, Namjoon. I’ll be good for you. Please.”

His hand wraps around the back of your neck, softly pulling you to him until he’s placing a peck on your plump lips. Your breath is erratic, pulse raising at the mere contact and you want more. You need more.

“Please,” you plead.

“Yeah? You’re asking so nicely. You know I can’t say no to you, baby.”

You look up at him with glassy eyes, shaking your head, agreeing with him to your favour. “N-no.”

“I could never say no to you.” His voice loses that edge for a second, eyes staring into yours, telling you things your dizzy state can’t quite read but there’s no need for it. It all falls into bliss the moment his lips are on yours, with force this time. You melt into him, lips parting to let him in, his teeth nipping at your bottom one before his tongue soothes the action. You want his lips everywhere, his mark, too. He kisses you like he’s mentally mapping everything he's going to do to you and the anticipation becomes sweet torture.

His free arm wraps around your waist, bringing you impossibly closer as your hands find his hair, fingers getting tangled in the locks.

“Fuck, you’ve any idea how hard it was to perform with you in my direct line of vision?”

“No,” it’s an honest answer. You hadn’t even noticed that he could see you from up there.

His palm closes around your fingers, his own getting lost in his hair for a second before he’s bringing both your hands down and in between your bodies until you’re palming his cock over the tight fabric of his slacks. He tightens your grip until you can make the shape of him perfectly with your touch. It makes you salivate.

“Did I paint you a picture?”

“Fuck. Want you in my mouth. Please.”

“On your knees, baby.”

You slide your body down the wooden door, a bit sloppily, out of character even and he lets out a chuckle, raising an eyebrow as he sees you struggle a bit to get on a comfortable position on your knees. The hardwood makes it hard. His fingers tangle on your hair again, bending over at the waist until he’s smashing your lips against his.

“I’ll kiss them better afterwards. Promise.”

With sweet words and a kiss to your cheek, he lets you continue, eyes fixed on the way you fiddle with his belt buckle for a second before you’re freeing him from the constraint around his waist. When you undo the button of his pants, your hand pulls his shirt up until a little bit of his abdomen is exposed, soft yet firm as you place a kiss on the tanned skin. His breath hitches in anticipation, the feel of your lips against him already driving him crazy and his cock is not even out of his boxer briefs yet.

“No teasing, ___.”

“I’m not,” you look up at him, agile fingers pulling his zipper down, palm closing around his clothed cock until he’s hissing. “Just like to take my time with you.”

“Hah-,” his words are lost the moment your teeth nibble at the band of his Calvin’s, warm breath hitting the sensitive skin of his pelvis. He feels like someone wired his every fucking nerve, so very supple to you. “We don’t learn, do we?”

You shake your head, a smug little smirk adorning your face as you rejoice in the way he’s complying the more your mouth travels south. His pants come down to his thighs, boxers following right after until you’re met with the very object of your desire.

Namjoon has the prettiest cock you’ve ever laid eyes on. Your hand wraps so perfectly around it, his size ensuring your fingers barely touch and his length guaranteeing a long, thick stripe from your tongue – base to tip until it’s wet enough for your hand to glide comfortably.

“Fuck,” his hand leans against the door, eyes following your every move, not wanting to miss the way your pretty lips wrap around his crown, tongue circling around the sensitive skin until you’re pulling a throaty moan out of him.

You look up as your tongue laps at him, big eyes feigning innocence as you leave little kitten licks that tease him for long enough to catch him off guard, hand placed at his base as you force yourself down his dick until the tip is hitting the back of your throat, your gag reflex only making things harder for Namjoon who has to take a deep breath to stop himself from blowing his load right then and there.

“You’re such a fucking minx,” he’s surprised he manages to get the sentence out in one breath, patience running low but his fun intensifying as you moan around his cock. If you didn’t have a mouthful right now, he could’ve sworn he saw the hint of a smile forming at your lips. Hands tightening on your hair, he pulls you away in one swift tug, smirking when drool drips down your chin as you try to catch your breath.

“You like me there, baby? Want me deep?”

“Yes, please.”

He grabs the base of his cock, slapping the tip against your tongue when you open up for him again.

“Hm. Should I fuck your mouth since you want to get brave?”

“Yes.” When you nod, his grip on your hair tightens.

“Open up.”

You comply, laying your tongue flat and taking a deep breath before you start taking him inch by inch. The thrust of his hips is slow at first, a sensual pace that has you bringing your legs closer together, but soon enough he picks up pace, making you gag with every jerk of his hips.

“Shit, that feels so good.” Your eyes begin to water, throat clenching around his crown. “You can take it, baby. Take it like my good little slut.”

You moan around his cock, the vibrations sending a dangerous signal all the way to his balls and he has to pull you off him to stop himself from coming – breathing erratic and chest flushed. Fuck, he could die this way and go happily. You look so fucked out, and all for him.

He helps you up, getting down on his own knees the moment you’re on your feet. You giggle, rolling your eyes at his sudden change of demeanour.

“Promised I’d kiss them better.” He places gentle kisses on both your knees, his palms rubbing the red skin soothingly. “I can kiss anywhere you want me to and make it better.”

Your fingers get lost in his dark hair, eyes closing in pleasure as his hand snakes in between your thighs. You love the foreplay, his tongue and his fingers and the way they move so expertly around you but you don’t think you have the patience for it today. You have to fuck him. Now.

“Need you inside me, Joonie.”

“Wanna taste you, baby.”

“Please,” you whine. “I’m so wet.”

He bites his lip, eyes on yours as his hand travels further up, eyes widening and gaze darkening the moment he comes into contact with your naked cunt. You whimper when his fingers part your lips, digits gathering your slick before they tease your clit, not quite putting the pressure you need into it, just a feather light touch.

“What’s this, huh?”

“M-my dress was too t-tight,” you say, shaky breaths leaving you.

“Hm, that’s right. So fucking tight, leaves pretty much nothing to the imagination.” His lips come into contact with your hips, biting over the fabric and you hiss, the burning feeling mixing with the pleasure.

He stands up, coming face to face with you before he’s motioning over to his bedroom with a cock of his head, slapping your ass when you take the lead, knowing your way around his home rather well at this point considering he’d fucked you in most hard surfaces.

You remove your dress upon entering his room, relieved to have the tight fabric off your body. You throw yourself onto his huge bed, crawling towards the pillows to get comfortable. He’s got other plans, though.

“Ah, not so fast. Stay there, baby.”

You simply smile at him, turning around so he can see you as you lay flat on the soft mattress, fingers lightly skimming your warm skin as you let him take you in. The dim light gives him a perfect view of you and you’re well aware that if this was any other man, you’d be too in your head to enjoy his eyes on you, but it’s Namjoon. His eyes dancing all over your naked body sends a rush of excitement pooling at your lower belly, and when his gaze finds your face and he smiles fondly, the feeling pools at your chest.

He fully discards of his pants and boxers, shirt following not too long after and when his knee hits the mattress as he begins to make his way towards you, you take the time to take him in. He looks even more toned than the last time, if that’s even possible. Forearm flexing as he strokes his cock, thick thighs clenching as he makes himself feel good to the sight of you.

His legs pry yours open as he stands between them, gaze dropping to your glistening cunt.

“I love it when you get this wet,” his thumb circles your clit, traveling down to your center and then back up, easing the glide the more you gush for him. His voice is throaty when he says, “prettiest pussy.”

“Mm, ‘s yours,” your voice is airy, dreamy even as your eyes flutter closed, a moan escaping you when his ring and middle finger enter you.

“Feel good, princess?”

“Y-yes, fuck- can’t wait to have your cock inside of me. Please, Namjoon. Need you inside.”

“How badly?”

Before you can get words out, his fingers hook inside of you, hitting that spot immediately, making you buck your hips and let out a high-pitched moan. “So fucking badly, baby- please.”

“Ride me.”

“Shit- yes.”

You’re eager, that much he can tell. Probably thinking that control has been handed back to you as you confidently push him towards his sea of pillows and swiftly throw a leg around his body, straddling him.

He pats the mattress around him until he finds the condom he’d thrown onto the bed before discarding his pants, bringing the shiny foil square to his lips and carefully ripping it open. You take the condom from him, rolling it down his shaft expertly, and a little impatiently, one hand leaning against his chest as the other guides his cock to your center, teasing yourself a few times before you begin to sink into him.

You both throw your heads back, falling into the pleasure. It feels so good, so much so it doesn’t take you by surprise when you say,

“I feel so close already,” moaning as you roll your hips against his.

His big palms grip at the flesh, stalling your movements which earns him a scowl from you.

“You cum when I say you can.”

“Joonie, please-” your voice is saccharine sweet but the attempts are unsuccessful, moan hitching on your throat as he thrusts into you with force, hand tangled in your hair once again. “F-fuck, baby.”

“God, you feel so good. Tightest pussy. Wanna fuck you forever.”

He’s merciless, fucking into you at an inhumane speed, with a force that you didn’t even think was possible from this angle, either. You can barely wrap your head around a thought, let alone articulate words as Namjoon leaves you a babbling mess on top of him.

“You’re gonna make me c-cum- you’re gonna make me cum if you go that fast, please.”

He thinks it’s cute, the desperate little tilt to your voice, eyes struggling to stay open as they lock on his, pleading for mercy. His hand travels down your ass, groping the plump skin for a second before he’s delivering a hard slap that has your back arching, his name getting caught in your throat as you mewl in pleasure. His hips don’t stop their obliterating pace and your legs begin to shake as you start to hold back from coming.

“Namjoon.” It’s a warning, head falling forward as your thighs close around his waist.

“Be good, ___.”

“I-I can’t it feels too good, fuck!” you outright scream.

“Thought you could get away- with being a brat huh, baby?” you can feel the strain in his voice, both from the physical exertion and the way his balls threaten to tip him over the edge anytime now. Your eyes flutter closed and he stops.

“What are you doing,” your question is frantic, so fucking close to your high you can feel it in your tongue.

“Ride me, baby.”

Your hips begin to move, as slowly as you can muster but Namjoon knows your body too well, he knows you know how to get yourself off expertly with his cock and it’s soon enough that you’re crying out, a desperate little whisper.

“I’ll cum.”

“Look at me, ___.” He says, and when you don’t comply, too fucked out to hold eye contact, he grabs a hold of your jaw. “Don’t you wanna be a good girl for me?”

“Yes, fuck, I want to be a good girl for you.”

“Mm, yeah. I know you can do it, baby. Come on.” His grip tightens and you know what’s coming. Your gaze gives him the permission he needs, his big palm cupping your cheek, sweetly at first before he’s drawing it back slightly, slapping the flushed skin until you’re moaning.

“Choke me,” you say, and he complies after another little slap to your cheek, big hands wrapping around your neck, just the right amount of force to have you feeling airy and just the good amount of lightheaded.

“You’re so sexy, princess. So fucking beautiful, too.” He tightens his grip around your neck ever so slightly as he brings your lips down to his. “Wanna cum?”

You don’t break the kiss. “Yes, please.”

“Cum, baby. Cum around this cock.”

You don’t need more encouragement than that, body relaxing as he loosens the grip on your throat, letting go fully as your orgasm hits you in the most mind-blowing waves of pleasure. You moan into his mouth, pulling at his hair as your body shakes on top of his.

“Fuck, ___. I’m gonna cum.” You kiss him, throaty groans against your lips sending your mind into a frenzy as he shoots into the condom.

Your bodies grow weak, breathing erratic as little giggles leave the two of you, too fucked silly to even ask what it is you both find so funny – all you know is that it always seems to be the aftermath of your escapades. This inexplicable giddy feeling filling your senses, euphoric almost.

If you weren’t too drunk in lust it’d scare you.

“Wanna shower? Have some ramen? Fucking hate the finger food at those parties.”

“Want me to relay the message to my bosses?”

He laughs, leaning in to kiss you, deep and full of something you can’t quite decipher.

“I’ll wait for you in the shower.”

He pecks your lips once again and makes his way to his ensuite bathroom.

You lay there for a while, deep in aimless thoughts that you know will land you nowhere but back in his arms, in the same dynamic, the same secret.

Yet you don’t care.

Doom seems to be blissful when it comes to him.

stream the astronaut 👩🏼‍🚀!! and sexy nukim!! and left and right!! and JITB!! and christmas tree!! and with you!! and that that!! and bad decisions!! and proof!! lets get it besties 🫂

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melancholy-of-nadia · 7 months

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love u lately (m) | myg/pjm/knj | masterlist

series: love u lately pairing: yoongi x f. reader, namjoon x f. reader, jimin x f. reader (yoonminjoon x f. reader) rating/genre: m (18+) ; college/university au, frat! bts; best friends to lovers, smut, angst summary: In the midst of your college journey, life takes an unexpected turn when you find yourself moving into a "frat" house with your childhood best friends Namjoon, Yoongi, and Jimin. The college experience you envisioned seems promising, but as Namjoon and Jimin get caught up in flings, their focus shifts away from you, Yoongi, and everyone else in the house. The strong bond you once shared starts to feel strained, leaving you to question your feelings and changing dynamics. Though, the haze of a single night at a party sets off a chain reaction of emotions that leaves you grappling with a question you never thought you'd ask—could you be in love with all three of them? warnings: stated in each chapter. minors dni!! mood: love u lately by LAICA - this is actually a song that plays in chapter 1 while reader is partying mlist created 2023/09/28 edited on 2024/03/02 status: ongoing

parts (8/12 available)

➵ #1 - lavender haze smut ; 8.3k ➵ #2 - right here smut ; 6.8k ➵ #3 - pears angst ; 7.3k ➵ #4 - sour candy smut , angst ; 12.4k ➵ #5 - home girl smut , angst ; 10.5k ➵ #6 - introspection smut, fluff, angst ; 9.6k ➵ #7 - people (pt. 2) angst , smut ; fluff 12.6k ➵ #8 - split fluff, smut ; angst 14.8k ➵ #9 - pour up angst, smut 14.3k ➵ #10 - wait for your love angst, fluff; ???? ➵ #11 - ?????? angst, fluff, smut ; ???? ➵ #12 - ?????? smut ; ???? rest of the chapter titles and content are tba

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aseaofyoongi · 2 years

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rivals academia | knj

pairing: knj x reader (f)

genre: slight angst/smut

rating: mature audiences ONLY (strictly 18+)

wc: 4.2 thousand

summary: you and kim namjoon absolutely hate eachother but after you’re both paired for a school project — things get rather interesting at the school library.

warnings: enemies to one-night stand (potential fwb) unprotected sex (wrap it up yall); penetrative sex; hand job; fingering; brief nipple play; teasing; dirty talk; public sex; foul language; dirty talk; bickering; thigh riding; slight degradation; praise kink; i think thats it ??; namjoon’s fucking thighs; i was having a moment of weakness please; college au

posted: sunday september 11th, 2022

Repulsed.

That’s precisely the word indicative enough to portray exactly how you felt. Repulsed, repugnant, nauseated, revolting — it all came rushing in like a wave of rage aggressively meeting the golden shores.

It was overwhelming yet still - here you sat across from him and his absolutely irritating aura. It excluded an intoxicating amount of cockiness and an irritating deal of arrogance.

His presence was so irritating.

So fucking irritating.

“Are we supposed to finish this whole project today?” He asked exasperated - as if putting off the project until the last minute wasn’t his exact idea and now he wants to treat it as a nuisance?

“The project is due Monday, Kim. And it is 8:00PM Friday,” you briefly examined the watch sitting on your wrist, “and I’m guessing you have plans for the entire weekend?”

Namjoon nodded eagerly, picking up his phone for the thousandth time but you snatched it right out of his hand.

“What the—”

“It’s time to get to work. For real this time, Kim.” You shoved his phone in your purse, “I'm tired of you just pretending to do things.”

“Can I have my phone back?” He uttered through gritted teeth.You could’ve sworn you saw clouds of smoke emitting from his ears as his usually chocolate eyes turned red hot with anger, “Now!.”

“You’ll get it back when you actually fucking do something for once.” You snapped back — standing your ground.

He slouched back on the wooden library chair and scoffed typing away at his laptop.

Kim Namjoon.

If it wasn’t obvious he wasn’t your first choice for a project partner, however, your Intro to Art History professor thought otherwise. And now you suffered the consequences; bearing the temper tantrums of a man baby.

“What was the year for Venus of Urbino again?”

“1534.”

“Artist?”

“Titian.”

“Interpretation some believe?”

You huffed — he was truly insufferable, “did you even read the cards she passed out?”

He rolled his eyes, “does it look like I did?”

“Kim, do I really have to do your part of the project too?”

He quirked a brow as he shrugged, “you’re the one holding me hostage.”

“I’m not holding you anything. You have a responsibility to this project as my partner. This doesn’t just fall on me.”

“And yet here I am contributing absolutely nothing and you’re already doing both our jobs so you might as well excuse me.” He pushed his chair back in an attempt to stand-up.

“I swear if you so much as take a step, Kim,” you stood up from the table from him — your eyes sternly set on his. You were not afraid of him, “your name will be removed from this entire fucking project and word on the street is you’re current GPA isn’t really securing you a place on the team. What is the athlete’s magic number again? 2.5 right?”

“Ouch!” His full lips curved into a smile. His chasmic dimples on full display. You could sense the sarcasm even in the simple phrase your attention was averted towards his lips. It’s rather nice. His smile that is. You didn’t really see it often but his smile — fuck — it was picturesque; similar to the sunset as it kissed the deepest depths of the cerulean sea when nighttime lurked behind in its shadows.

“Don’t hold back now.” he uttered, taking a seat once again.

“I don’t intend to.”

“Tell me, doll. Are you always this dense?”

You ignored him and continued typing your section of the project. Just pretend he’s not even here — you repeat in your head.

“Are you going to answer my question on Venus about the depiction or should I spend the next hour researching it?”

You looked up at him and there it is again. The soft strokes of curvatures of his golden cheeks painting a delicate smile.

“It is literally a five minute search,” You cleared your throat in an attempt to be clear and to avoid having to repeat yourself, “but to save you the trouble; we're focusing on sexuality through the ages she is theorized to be masturbating, Kim.”

“Masturbating?”

“Precisely, with the way she’s laying naked and the placement of her hands — it’s only been assumed by some and obviously our professor as well considering she included it.”

Namjoon huffed. “Interesting.”

“Not at all,” you pointed at his laptop, “now write it down.”

“You don’t think so?”

“Where is this going, Kim?”

“Well,” he began, “I don’t mean to be lewd—”

“You already are, Kim.”

“It’s Joon,” Namjoon smirked, “but have you ever?”

His words were brief but they were tainted with a vivid carmine hue — all of it backtracked with sexual intent. And truly you despised the kaleidoscope of butterflies erupting at the pit of your stomach.

“That is none of your business.”

“—but it is something to be curious about.”

“I don’t see why,” though the library was completely vacant and you both sat in a private study area for some reason you could feel a swarm of watchful judging eyes — all of them condemning everything you've ever done. Everything right down to that very question. You shifted in your seat clearly affected at the utterances of his beguiling words, “and the next artwork on the list is The Swing. Figure it out.”

“Truly, has a girl like you even —” he chuckled, “never mind.”

“What could you possibly mean by that?” there was a feeling bubbling deep inside but you couldn’t quite decipher what it was. Anger? Annoyance? Bashfulness? .

“I just mean you’re innocent.”

“Innocent?”

“You could barely say ‘masturbation’ without a stutter a couple minutes ago,” he shrugged and you knew that in his own twisted way Namjoon was using this as another thing to hold over you.

“Have you ever thought that maybe I just don’t feel like discussing those things with you. This has nothing to do with how innocent you think I am.”

“I think. .” He drifted off. His chin was now propped up on his palms.

“You think?” you emphasized the word ‘think.’

“You wanna know what I think?”

“Is it that maybe you should shut up for once so we can get this project done already?”

“In fact,” he scoffed, beginning to share his theory anyway, “I think you’re a virgin.”

“That’s a great observation, Kim. Now let’s move on to what we’re actually here for.”

He slouched down in his chair, his arms now crossed at his chest, his eyes laid intently on you sitting right across from him. His watchfulness was kind of — intimidating to say the least.

“Kim, it’s 9PM. Can we please?” you sighed your eyes, never leaving the brightness of your screen.

“I would but it’s just so hard to concentrate.”

You sighed, “what will it take for you to finally move on and finish this project once and for all?” You shut your laptop, your eyes finally meeting his once again,

“Answer my question. Have you ever masturbated?”

His cavernous voice was bottomless like the deep sea and the obscenity in his words sent a glacial shiver down your spine. Was his voice always this low? You’d never really noticed before.

“I know you may think I’m familial to freaks of some sort but like any normal person I have in fact masturbated Joon,” you let out all in one breathe.

“You called me Joon,”

“I did,” his smile beamed brighter than sun rays — the rapid thumping of your heart beat aggressively thumped against the walls of your chest and you were afraid he might just be able to hear, “Are we done or do you also need a demonstration?”

“Let’s make your proposition a bit more sensible,” he began.

“I was kidding.”

“It was your idea,” The air in the room grew thicker. It constricted your airway and for a minute you felt like you couldn’t breathe. Were the air vents even opened here? You checked and they were, “are you already backing out now?”

“Joon. .”

“Tell me,” his voice was provocative and you feared one more soft utter would have you stripped bare with little to no command.

“Tell you?” your leg is bouncing under the wooden table and you could feel your palms growing clammy.

The soft glimmer of the luminous moonbeam was casted upon him accentuating his sun-kissed tone and the striking features staring back at you intently — his glistening cherry lips, the way his dimples formed at the mere appearance of the smirk on his face and his stern amber gaze still so intimidating. It made you feel small but you are not going to show him the power he could have over you.

“What do you wanna hear?” your tone now masked in thin layers of silk.

He panted softly, “I want to hear it all.”

“You wanna hear about how I lay completely bare with my head propped up against my pillows. Eyes shut tightly as my hands explore every single inch of my body pretending it’s someone else?”

“Fuck-” His hands dug under the waistband of his sweats. Your eyes now casted on the way the cotton light grey fabric rhythmically moved up and down repeatedly. His chest heaved as his breathing became uneven — and in that moment you could not think of a more captivating sight. Like an erotic painting right out of the renaissance era. You remained at your previous position behind his chair, “but when I get tired of that I have to resort to other measures as you may know.”

“I d-don’t know..” he groaned. His tone expressed frustration and arousal combined. The repulsion you once felt ceased and all your mind could become aware of was the vast ocean accumulating between your thighs; staining the fabric of your underwear as the sight of Namjoon stroking himself in the campus library became imprinted in your mind.

“Sometimes, I also like to mount my pillow placing my thighs on each side as I move my hips steadily against the soft fabric. Slowly rolling my hips back and forth until I’m finally able to reach that high,” you whispered.

His soft pants filled the stillness and furnished the serenity amongst the vacant tables and chairs right outside the private study room. The sounds so addicting it looped within the walls of your head like a vinyl on a broken record player.

“Y-You—” was all he could manage as he became enthralled in his own pleasure, the sweat forming at his temples could attest to it.

“Can I touch you Joon?”

“Please.”

You placed a velvet kiss on the nape of his neck. Your hands found their way up to his dark strands — you softly tugged at it, pushing his head back, “well I’m not the one with my hands in my pants. Am I?”

A thunderous chuckle rumbled within the four walls of the secluded study room, “Please believe you are the clear cause of this.”

“I didn’t do anything, Joon.” you let out an airy laugh, “just provided details of a scenario per your request. Remember?”

“You’re a fucking demon.”

“And you’re too easy. Just like every other horny dude on this campus.”

“Please—” He begged, grabbing onto your wrist before you could walk away. This tone was husk and as much as you hated to admit it. It was like an alluring song to your ears all of it shooting right down to your core just like everything he did. “I need you.”

I need you. The three words invaded your tympanum serving as a command for his needed pleasure and you felt as if your feet vacated their stance on the ground. His honey voice was lulling and if he continued to say anything in that tone, you’d fear your dignity would rid itself and follow every single thing he’d bark without objection. Every bone in your body already begged you to comply; to do it for you and chase your own pleasure — and as much as your mind screamed at you to leave. You listened to the throbbing between your legs instead.

“Pull it all down,” You ordered and Joon quickly rid himself of the pesky fabrics standing between him and utter vulnerability. He didn’t even bother to get up, just allowed them to pool at his ankles. His rather massive erection now on full display — shocked wasn’t the word you were looking for. After all, Joon always exuded the aura that he was considerable in size but nevertheless it was a pleasant reaffirmation to your lingering rumors.

Joon cleared his throat pulling your eyes away from his erection — your trance was essentially amusing to him, you could see it painted on his smirk, “You can come closer you know. If you want to.”

“Closer?”

Joon softly tapped on his bare thighs. His thick fucking thighs. Having attended numerous of his soccer games you were constantly given a sneak peak at his toned legs. His upper thighs often lolled you into a fantasy that was now taking play right before you and instead of following the script your head had created for you on multiple occasions; instead you sat here salivating at the clear view of his lower half without the burden of shorts being in the way.

“Come sit. Please,” his pleading made your legs turn to jello — the way his tone so delicately continued to voice his intricate needs was fucking sexy. Although you’ve only been sitting on top of his left thighs approximately 30 seconds now you couldn’t help the way you were throbbing at an uncontrollable beat. You were certain he could feel it too — it was plastered all over his shit-eating grin.

“Can you be a good girl and move for me please?” His tone still velvet to the touch.

Your underwear were already drenched and you were terrified he would notice — the lack of shorts under your skirt left only the thin cotton fabric of your underwear to meet his thighs. But you were not going to back down. Not now.

“Have you done this before?”

“No,” you simply stated.

“Just follow along.”

You nodded.

Initially, the mere feeling of his hands secured around your waist clouded your thoughts entirely. His warm grasp sent waves of electric currents down your spine but nothing prepared you for the feeling that bubbled in your core as soon as his sinful hands instructed you to move. The pace began agonizingly slow and you followed his motion moving forward and backwards against his thigh.

You whimpered, “It feels so good. .”

Joon laughed — the sound drummed at your eardrums and without a stutter in his rhythm you were being guided to move against him faster and faster as he continued flexing his thigh muscles causing all that more friction against your lower half.

“N-namjoon,” You moaned holding on to his chest for support; your head rolled back as you grew consumed by pleasure.

His hands vacated their place on your waist but you continued the steady pace against him chasing a high you knew you were very close to achieving. Joon’s attention was diverted into your clothed chest.

“Can I take your shirt and bra off?”

“Mhm,” was all you truly could manage.

Though, you were breaking a sweat going at it against his thighs as soon as your top half was stripped you felt a draft of cool air meet your perky nipples. The slight frigidness you briefly felt subsided and instead you were met with Joon’s warm touch once again except now it was taking a hold of your breast — his slender finder massaged one while the other was taken care of by his plump lips. Your hands traveled to the back of his neck as the rhythm of your hips stopped against his thigh. Your senses now focused entirely on the way he swirled his tongue against the sensitive bud.

He paused for a moment looking up at you through hooded eyes, “did I say you could stop?”

“No.”

“Then, continue riding my thigh until I say it’s enough.”

The switch off between his pleads for consent and the way he barked orders in your direction shot straight down only adding to the piled up sexual frustration bubbling deep within you but nevertheless you obeyed — now taking on a slower pace against him as he continued his attack on your breasts.

Locked away in a retreat of arousal and between slurred words and dazed moans you asked Joon if he was in accordance with receiving some attention as well.

“I want to focus on you.”

“And I on you,”

“If you insist,” he gave in, “just stay on my lap.”

His words set a stump in wanting to suck him off but ultimately you settled for using your hands. After aiming down to use your saliva as lubricant you could see the shock sitting behind his lust induced eyes. Your hands began working at his length mimicking his earlier motions — there was nothing more you wanted than to be on your knees in front of him but you were glad you fought against those urges when you felt his hands traveling under your skirt to move your panties to the side.

“Fuck.” He hissed, “you’re drenched.” Joons words only affect you in the worst way possible. Causing the pool between your thighs to deepen, “you claim you’re so fucking quiet but that’s all a facade you know. You’re a fucking slut.”

You never thought a word would affect you as much as being called a slut but you fucking loved it.

“Call me that again,” you whined, “call me that again, please.”

“You’re a slut — you know that?” the soft pads of his fingers finally arrived at their destination and quickly began massaging your clit . . lento. An eruption of lights fired in the back of your mind as Joon continued to immerse himself in bringing you utter satisfaction. You were levitating — your body vibrated which only accentuated the feeling of his heavenly touch.

“Your slut.” your lips ‘fessed up before your brain could register what you actually said.

“My slut.” He sat-up on the wooden chairs but his fingers abandoned your bundle of nerves and traveled further down resting at your entrance, “You know what you’re doing to me right?”

His face was just inches away from yours but your eyes were set on his lips — you leaned forward. Both of you began composing a magical piece in the way your lips danced against each other. His kisses were drug induced and you were already addicted; making it impossible to even pull away so you didn’t and he certainly didn’t either. Under your skirt his phantom touch ceased until you felt his pointer and middle fingers push past your entrance.

“Your fingers are blessed Joon. . They’re fucking blessed. .” you rambled on, “Blessed.”

“You think so?” He pushed them further in causing a strain of moans to fall from your swollen lips.

“Hmm.”

Joon’s pace picked up as he continued to move in and out of you repeatedly. Truly, all the words you could make out were stuttered strings of praises toward his fingers. They were fucking blessed and right then you swore you could write a million poems just on how delectable they felt inside of you.

“Uh, J-Joon. I’m so close. . so so fucking close Joon.”

“Come for me,” he whispered against the nape of your neck as he continued peppering you with silken kisses.

“Shit. .”

His fingers continued moving at a rapid pace as they finally met that spot that drove you over the edge. If you were levitating before you could easily confirm that now you danced amongst the twinkling stars.

“You were so good for me.” He was panting, his chest matching your heaving as you came down from your high, “so fucking good for me.”

His words were always so intricately sensual and you could feel your arousal throb at his dulcet praises.

Why did you hate him again? You couldn’t recall ever having such a feeling for the man you were currently straddling.

You didn’t hate him. You craved him.

After Namjoon removed his hands from underneath your skirt he brought his fingers up to your mouth and smeared your juice on your lips like lip gloss. Before you knew it you were welcoming his digits past your cerise lips tasting your sweet nectar right off his fingers.

“You are so hot.”

“Did it really take having me half naked on your lap for you to realize that?”

“Actually, no. . only one of us in this room actually hated the other.”

“I didn’t hate you.” you blurred out.

“I didn’t say you did, doll. But since you practically snitched on yourself I think it’s safe to say you despise me. ”

“I despised you. As it's in the past,” you corrected him.

“Dick is all it took to change your mind?”

“Hmm,” you took Joon’s cock in your hand slowly pumping at his shaft once again. And he just looked so good— slouched on the chair, his hair disheveled, a slight glow taking hold of his forehead and chest as sweat ran down his tan skin tone. His grin showed the way his teeth sparkle even in the darkness of the room. Namjoon is pulchritudinous and you are under his spell, “I would need to actually have you inside me to make that deduction.”

“I-I didn’t bring protection,” he let out in-between pants.

“I mean I’m clean. Are you?”

He nodded eagerly. But that didn’t suffice. You wanted to hear his raspy voice as confirmation. You tightened your hold on his erection just a bit, “I didn’t hear you.”

His jaw was clenched but still managed a soft, “I’m clean.”

“Perfect.”

Joon welcomed you back on his lap now accompanying him in complete nudity after you had finally decided to rid yourself of the clothes still covering your lower half. His keen gaze felt like it cut right through your confidence like a knife. And although it was a bit intimidating you didn’t let it set a stumble in your actions. His hand landed back on your waist like earlier that night and he guided you towards the tip of his erection.

“Hold it while you go down.”

You complied. Taking him inch-by-inch, your mouth forming into an ‘O’ immediately after his tip pushed past your entrance.

“Y-you’re so fucking big,” you could’ve sworn his length was sucking the air right out of you like a vacuum.

If you thought Namjoon’s thighs and fingers are graces sent by God himself, there was absolutely nothing in this world that could compare to his cock. There was nothing in this world that could feel so—

“J-Joon,” you moaned, attempting to keep up with the overwhelming pleasure driven by the guidance of his clammy hands as you bounced on his dick.

“You feel so good, doll. You’re doing so well.”

His praises you discovered are your weakness — his words were dipped in honey and they fed your ears affirmations you could not get enough of. Your head grew hazy at the duality in his words.

That alone drove you closer and closer to the edge. Not to mention the way his thrusts met yours was a sufficient contribution to your demise — you are about to crumble at the mercy of Kim Namjoon’s massive dick.

“R-right there,” your temples glisten with sweat and you could feel the scratchiness in your throat take flight after the past hour you’ve just had, “don’t— please don’t stop.”

��Mhm. .” His thrusts are harder. Deeper. You could feel the way he continued meeting you right where you needed him most. His eyes never lose contact where your bodies meet comforted in the way he disappears inside of you entirely.

And he continued fucking you so good. Fucking you into oblivion.

The silence that once tip-toed around the both of you was gone never to be seen again. Instead it was replaced by the squeaking of the chair (which you continued to pray it wouldn’t break), Namjoon’s groans and your slurred obscenities. It was like that for a while until your legs began to shake and your moans became too loud to suppress. Until your juices coated his cock and his filled you up.

“The Swing-” he managed after catching his breath, “Jean-Honoré Fragonard, 1767. It symbolizes the ideas of infidelity, desire, eroticism and love. The guy on the bottom left is peeking up her dress right?”

“Huh?”

“The next one on the list for our project.”

You stared at him wide-eyed, a bit stunned by the realization, “You knew the information this entire time?”

“I had to get your attention somehow right,” he snickered.

“I hate you, Kim Namjoon,” you laughed playfully, landing a punch on his arm.

“After tonight, I think we both know that is simply not true.”

authour’s note: it took me forever to finish this for a lot of reasons but the main being that thisismyfirstsmutandiwassupernervoustopost so lol sorry if its — bad — i do apologize in advance. I tried and am using it as a way to break out of that shell and explore uncharted grounds. either way i hope some of you enjoy it lol

thank you for reading <3

- em

#kim namjoon #bts rm #bts #namjoon drabble #namjoon smut #bts smut #bangtan sonyeondan #joon smut #rm smut #bts au masterlist #bts college au #bts drabble #namjoon x reader #rm x reader #bts x reader #bts angst #poc kpop #em stories

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chimcess · 9 months

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Dino-Mite || knj

Pairing: Namjoon x Reader (ft. Taehyung x Reader) Other tags: Archeologist!Namjoon, Paleontologist!Reader, Ph.D!Student!Reader, Ph.D. student!Namjoon, Pet Store Cashier!Reader Genre: College!AU, Ivy League!AU, Neighbors!AU, Strangers to lovers!AU, Idiots to lovers (i2l), Fuckboy!AU, Age Gap!AU, fluff, angst, awkward love story, Smut Word Count: 34.7k+ Synopsis: With the end of her college career coming to an end, Y/N is about to make her way into the adult world outside of Harvard. That’s when she finds an unlikely friendship with her sex-crazed neighbor, Namjoon, who shows her how unexpected life can be. Warnings: They’re so cute, too much dinosaur talk, slow start, Older Reader, alcohol consumption (not reader), Mentions of bad sexual experiences (not reader and Joon), talks about unsupportive parents, talks about character death (not in story), Anxiety, Reader is horny, too shy to say it, Sweet Namjoon, very supportive relationship, past bad relationships, inexperienced reader, fuck boy Joon (kinda), Tae is a creep (sorry), daddy kink, soft dom!Joon, spanking (like twice), fingering, penetration, protected sex (wrap it up), degradation, I have never written smut before (I’m trying my best lol), pretty vanilla all things considered, let me know if I missed anything A/N: This is a lot of fun for me and a nice change of pace from my usual projects. I really love this couple, and I hope you enjoying reading <3

Listen to the Playlist || Cross posted on ao3: here

I sighed and looked back into the magnifying glass. It had been damaged, the ivory tusk lightly chiseled away, but my elation was not dimmed. Even with the cracks and chips, the massive bone was in my hands. I had weighed and measured it extensively before beginning a thorough investigation of the fossil. It was about 2.6 meters long, and even my bitterness over not having an entire skull to work with was overshadowed by the beauty of the Woolly Mammoth. I quickly noted the damage and the off-white color of the bone. I looked back down.

I had been in the fossil room for hours now. As one of the TAs, a professor of mine had emailed me to come down and check out the new shipment. Dr. Lupon and I had been together since I had started my freshman year at Harvard. 12 years later, I am now 29 and still stuck at school researching rocks and bones just as I did all those years ago. And while we could gush about rocks together any day of the week, she knew that I had been waiting for the new fossils to come in. I loved bones even more than rocks.

My eyes began to burn, and I quickly gave them a rub before returning to my assignment. I was almost finished. I glanced at my wristwatch and groaned. It was nearing 3 in the morning, and I had a lecture in less than 5 hours. It was time to call it quits for the night. I made quick work of putting the tusk back in its proper place, taking great care with it, and cleaning up my workstation. It was 4 when I finally got out of the lab.

Massachusetts was beautiful in the winter. I loved the snow and the way the wind nipped the tip of my nose. It was a nice change from the hot, dry climates I faced in the summer. Expeditions with Dr. Montgomery were as fun as they were horrendous. I took a huge breath of air and sighed out in relief. No sand in my nose. No mosquitoes. No sunburns. Just a winter wonderland spread across the campus.

The walk back to my apartment was short. I only lived two blocks away from campus. As expensive as it was, I enjoyed living out of the dorms. I had stayed in them until I had finished with my undergrad and had not moved from my small, one-bedroom flat since. I was a creature of habit. My whimsical side was “strictly reserved for dead things,” as Kendall put it. While it was true, there was one thing that made me just as excited as rocks did.

I wonder if Taehyung had stopped by tonight.

I knew he lived in my building, and even if he hardly knew my name, I could pick him out in a crowd. My friends had been insistent I ask him out after two years of pining over him. He often came into Adrian’s, the pet store I worked at, to purchase food for his turtles. Our conversations always focused on his pets and sales, but his smile could make anyone melt. My little crush was justified as was my hesitation.

Jungkook was just getting home as well. His school sweats and frizzy hair gave away his whereabouts. Even if he did not think I knew about it, Jungkook had been hooking up with a girl I worked with for weeks. A deep, purple mark on his neck was going to be impossible to explain away, but I decided against commenting on it. It was too late, and we were both tired. Kendall would see it anyway.

“Hey, Jeon,” I greeted with a yawn.

“Sup.” He replied, opening his door before disappearing.

I was not offended. I did it to him all the time. I threw my keys onto my coffee table before stumbling out of my boots. I was not showering tonight. I began stripping on my way to my room, throwing my clothes on top of other garments from this week, and flopping onto my bed. I was exhausted but my mind was alight. I could not believe that I was the first person to see the mammoth tusk in its glory. My phone chimed next to my head.

Jungkook: My bad

Y/N: All good

Jungkook: Night

Y/N: Night

I could faintly hear music coming from my other neighbor’s room. At least it was not the usual. He was nice enough, the week I moved in he had left a small box of cookies in front of my door. However, the good feelings towards him diminished just as quickly. He was a nympho. Almost every night of the week he would have someone on the other side of my wall screaming. Sometimes it was at 9 pm and other times it would wake me up at 4 am and keep me up until my lecture at 7. I closed my eyes and sighed in relief. Tonight would be a quiet night it seemed.

Then, just as I was on the cusp of sleep, I heard it. A loud, angry bang on the other side. A girl moaned loudly. Huffing, I squeezed my eyes tightly shut, willing for them to stop and watch anime. The sounds got louder. I grabbed my headphones out of my nightstand and quickly put on some music as they connected. I heard another loud bang.

The music was never loud enough to drown it out, so I lay there, staring at my ceiling, listening to Billy Marten and my neighbor’s headboard slamming into the wall.

My eyes burned when my alarm went off for the fourth time. I had been considering skipping my morning lecture since the lovebirds next door had been hell all morning. I had not been able to doze off until 6 and an hour later my alarm went off to let me know it was shower time. I kicked my legs childishly before hitting dismiss with too much aggression. Today was going to be awful.

I forced myself out of bed and into the bathroom to brush my teeth. I glared at my reflection and mentally screamed at her for being such a good student. Never in my entire time at university did I miss a class. Not even my 6 am environmental science course during my freshman year. Giving up on looking decent at all, I haphazardly threw my hair up and rolled my eyes at the strays flying everywhere. God himself could not make me fight with my contact lenses this morning.

Still, in my sour mood, I stomped around my apartment making a bowl of cereal and grumbling about being out of almond milk. After eating my bowl of too-dry cereal, I slipped on the baggiest gray sweatpants I owned and a Harvard sweatshirt. Jungkook and I were most likely matching. For a law student, he did not give a shit about going to his classes cleaned up like the rest of them. Angry and in the mood to punch a hole through my neighbor’s wall to give him a piece of my mind, I slid into my checkered Vans before locking up.

Jungkook looked worse than I did. Sweatpants were one thing but to wear plaid striped pajama pants to a law class? Bold move, Jeon. While I was surprised to see him up so early in the morning, I knew he was twice as shocked to see me running late. He raised an eyebrow and eyed me apprehensively. I gave him a lazy wave before starting my descent down the rod iron stairs.

“You look like shit,” Jungkook said, catching up to me.

“Aren’t you charming,” I yanked a cap out of my bag and put it on to cover how bad my hair looked.

“What happened?”

“Neighbor. Again.”

He laughed, his nose scrunching up as he did so. Jungkook, like everyone else I knew, was aware of my bad neighbor. We had tried to figure out who it was once, but it always ended up in disaster. The last time was a drunk escapade last year. Instead of sitting in the freezing cold waiting for the man of the hour to show up, I tripped over my own feet walking up the stairs, fell over the railing, and broke my arm. Kendall, my best friend, never let me live it down.

“Have to hand it to him,” Jungkook giggled. “The guy is drowning in pussy.”

I shoved him roughly, “You’re so gross. Go away.”

Jungkook cackled loudly and clutched his stomach. Realizing I was only making myself angrier by sticking around, I walked away. My face was hot, my teeth clenched, and seconds away from crying. Last year, I reminded myself. After this I would be somewhere in the continental U.S., working at the best museums, and as far away from the asshole next door.

“Aw, come on Y/N,” Jungkook shouted after me. “Don’t be like that.”

“Whatever!” I yelled over my shoulder.

Jungkook did not bother to follow me after that. I was a ticking time bomb now, and it was best that everyone stayed clear of me. Finally making it to the bike rack out front, I wasted no time putting in my lock’s combination. Once I sat in my seat I would feel better. Maybe I could stop by the lab after class and have some cool-down time? My hands shook but I managed to unwrap my lock and shoved it into my bike’s cup holder.

“Morning, Y/N.”

I shrieked in surprise before whipping my head around to see who was talking to me. The first thing I saw was his chest, his gray tank top sticking to his body with sweat stains soaking through. Taehyung smiled at me, his hair damp from his morning run, and I struggled to breathe at the sight of him. Dear God, why me? Why now?

“Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you,” He said, still catching his breath.

“Oh,” I exclaimed, “No, no, no.” I waved my hands and nervously laughed. “It’s okay. No harm done. Good morning to you too, Tae.”

The man’s eyes danced with laughter, and I wanted nothing more than the ground to swallow me whole. It was unfair just how little he noticed me at all. It was even more unfair that he made me feel like I was running a marathon just standing next to him. Flustered, I kicked up my stand and pulled my bike off the rack.

“I have to get to a lecture, but I’ll see you later,” I said and swung a leg over my seat.

Jungkook always made fun of me for wearing a helmet when I rode. No one else really did and it looked lame, but I would rather look like an idiot than crack my head open on the concrete if I took a fall. Securing my helmet, I found Taehyung still standing there looking at me.

“Did you need something?” I asked.

“Cuff and Link,” He started, “They’ve been having a hard time eating.”

I nodded. Those were his pet turtles. When I first started working at the pet store, he had come in looking for a low-maintenance pet that would keep him company at home. At the time, he had only been in America for a few months and was having a hard time making friends. Cuff and Link, previously Jim and Pam, were a pair of red-ear sliders that had been stuck at the store for over a year. He ended up taking them both and was in all the time for food, treats, and sometimes just to give updates.

“I wanted to ask yesterday but you weren’t in when I got there,” He continued.

“Yeah, we got some new stuff in the museum, and I was cataloging it,” My heart fluttered at the thought of him asking for me.

“That sounds nice,” He smiled at me. “The other clerk didn’t know what to do about it.”

“Come by tonight,” I said, glancing at my watch with feign indifference. “My shift starts at 9.”

He smiled at me, “Thank you. See you later, Y/N.”

“Bye,” I said and sped off knowing I had successfully ruined my perfect attendance streak.

I clocked in before securing the khaki apron around my neck. The small mom-and-pop pet store was more expensive than Petco, but its location made up for the small price increase. The owner, Jill, also handcrafted a large majority of the pet outfits and collars, so many of the rich kids I went to school with would prefer to come here. She even did customs for her regulars. I liked the job and had been here since my sophomore year during undergrad. We all knew that I would be leaving the small shop after graduation, and hopefully, the state as well, but never spoke about it. It made Jill sad.

After my coworker and I said pleasantries and they got me up to date on what needed to be done before closing, he left, and I was alone. I knew Taehyung would come by late. He always did. I was not sure what he did for a living, if he was in school or not, but I was certain I was older than him. My crush was just that- a crush. Nothing to get too hung up on. Even if Taehyung was a daydream, I knew better than to let my mind get away from me.

As I began stocking the shelves, I let my mind wander. It beat getting stuck in the monotonous task of labeling and putting away new pet furniture. I had not dated successfully ever. Most men shied away from me the moment they realized I was a paleontologist. Unless they were in a similar field or mindset, I could understand why it might freak them out. Many of the people I worked with were oddballs. I loved them dearly, but they could be off-putting. Hell, I could be, too. I found that men hated being clueless, many were unable to be in a room with people that made them feel dumb, and I had a bad habit of talking about my work. There are only so many dinosaur facts one can hear before they no longer want to have sex with you. Fragile egos and insecurities only added to that problem.

So, while I have been on many dates and put myself out there, it still made finding someone difficult. That was why I never went after Taehyung. Sure, I think he is cute but that is the problem. I would only put my foot in my mouth and scare him off. It was much better to allow myself to imagine the possibility of a date rather than ruining it. He could be a piece of garbage and I would have to live with that information, or I could bore him to death and give my friends another reason to mention by name to every straight guy they knew. Thinking about it now, my own fears were justified. I knew next to nothing about the guy. As far as I knew, he was a man who had two pet turtles, had huge muscles, and was a fan of video games. While it was enough to get a vague idea about his likes, it was still not enough to feel like we had enough in common to click. I glanced at the clock.

9:47 pm.

I still had another hour at least. He could have a night job… or maybe an exam? He seemed like the type to study. I went to the back and got another large box. Shipments sucked and Cory, one of my coworkers, was normally too busy to get much done during his shift. That meant I was stuck with the grueling process of labeling, scanning, and stocking the entire store. Adrian’s was open 24/7, the only pet store in the city to do so, and I worked until 3 am most days. Except for when I gave morning lectures on Wednesdays and over the weekend. Jill closed early Saturdays and Sundays. She enjoyed spending time with her kids and liked to give us the break. I finished another large box before checking the clock again.

10:58 pm.

He could come in at any point now. I stopped trying to keep up with him a while ago. One thing was certain: he never came in before 10:30. Most nights, he dragged himself in around midnight looking like he had just woken from a nap. Some days he would stumble in drunk with a buddy to pick up food at 2 in the morning. If anyone else had come in right before I went home, I would have been angry, but those nights made him more human. His speech was slurred, face flushed, but he was still so perfect. His friend was grumpy and stone-faced but kept him awake long enough to purchase his food and stumble home. Nights like that made it impossible for me to forget about him.

The bell chimed and I quickly stood up. Glancing at the clock, it was half-past 11 and I was happy he was in earlier than I had expected. I began to focus on leveling out my breathing before I saw him. I needed to get together. Taehyung made it hard to breathe and after this morning I was on high alert. No need to embarrass myself even more.

No amount of controlled breathing could have prepared me for what was waiting by the counter. There he was dressed up, his hair slicked back and styled elegantly with a brown, plaid blazer jacket on. A white turtleneck emphasized his chest and brown slacks hugged his thighs deliciously. This was uncharted territory. I was so used to a casually dressed man with black hair that was wet from the snow that the thought of him looking nice had never entered my mind. Where had he been? Or going?

It looked like a date.

“Welcome to Adrian’s,” I called out, my customer service voice on.

“It’s me,” He replied, scratching the back of his head and smiling.

Of course, he was on a date. A guy like that had to have countless women at his beck and call. I had heard girls talking about him before. It was always in passing and I had never been able to catch much, but people were interested. I could not even be upset. If I was more confident, I might have asked him out already. I thought about my neighbor and internally cringed at the thought of Taehyung being that guy. No fucking way was he was anything like the man next door. I took a deep breath before walking out onto the main floor.

“Oh, hey,” I replied, pretending that I had not been admiring him from afar. “Sorry about that, we got a new shipment and I’m always stuck stocking.”

“No problem,” He flashed one of those close-lipped grins at me, “So, Cuff and Link.”

I got behind the counter and nodded. Yes, the turtles. He had mentioned they had not been eating and I took some time before my shift to research the subject. There were many problems they could be facing but I needed more information before I gave any advice. I pulled out the large pet book from behind the counter for extra measure. It came in clutch.

“You said they’re not eating?” I clarified, opening the book and searching for the turtle section. Page 126. Got it.

“Yeah, it’s been going on for about a week now.” He replied, leaning against the counter on his elbows.

He was far too close. I subtly shifted away from him and hummed showing that I was listening. I found the section about turtle health.

“And you’re up to date about their lighting and temperature needs?”

“I’ve had them for five years now and they have never had these problems before.”

“I know Taehyung,” I skimmed through the book some more. “Just making sure.”

He hummed a response, but I did not care to decipher the meaning behind it. It did not sound angry, so I assumed it was not.

“So, they’re getting 10-12 hours of UVB light a day?” I glanced up at him.

“Day basking at 90 degrees. and off at night,” He scratched the back of his neck. “Before you ask, their water is 80 degrees.”

I nodded. That was all perfect for red-ear sliders. I knew the breed from the numerous times he had come in for different items of theirs. I used to be sad that I knew more about the turtles than I did their owner, but I realized how much he loved the little guys and it made everything better. If I was not so busy, I would buy a pet of my own. The only problem being I was always doing something and was extremely irresponsible. There was a reason I preferred dead things. I had killed every fish I had ever owned, and plants were hopeless in my care. Even cacti.

“Any big move? Stress could make them stop eating.” I stole a glance at him.

He shook his head no.

“Nothing like that either. I might just take them to the vet.” Taehyung sighed.

“What is their normal diet?” I quickly asked.

He looked so sad. I wanted to find a solution for him. I knew how expensive that vet visit would be, not including the trip across town to the exotic doctor. I skimmed the paragraphs while I waited for an answer.

“They eat the commercial stuff.”

I hummed and placed the book on the counter. From what the book said they could be getting bored with their diet. Turtles who only ate commercial food could stop eating until they got to try something new to stimulate their appetite.

“Have you ever tried adding some variety?” I asked, leaning against the counter with my elbows.

I ignored the way my stomach flipped at his proximity.

“Like what?”

“Well,” I started, “Turtles love bugs. Crickets, snails, mealworms, and earthworms are all options to try. They can even eat feeder fish in their tank if you add some in there.”

“My roommate would kill me if I put any of that in our fridge.”

I laughed. I could not blame them. I would hate knowing there were bugs next to my cream cheese, too. The thought of it made my stomach churn and I fought the urge to gag. Gross.

“Well, they can also eat fresh veggies and fruits. The book recommends leafy vegetables or grapes and strawberries. You can even try soaking their food in fruit juice or canned tuna water. They love bright colored things.”

He smiled at me again. I swooned. The way his eyes crinkled was adorable. He must have been kissed by an angel and hand crafted by God himself to look the way he does. Even in the poor, dim fluorescent lights, he looked good. Fuck good- great.

“I’ll pick some up in the morning then.”

“Glad to hear it.”

“Thanks, Y/N.” He looked down at the floor, scuffing his shoe.

So cute.

“Happy to help. Don’t want the little guys to go hungry.” I half-heartedly laughed and tapped on the glass case in front of me.

“Hey-“

He was interrupted by the chime on the door. It was his friend, the grumpy drunk guy, and I noticed the way his shoulders slumped. I wonder what the problem was. Were they having problems? I wish we were close enough for me to ask.

“Tae let’s go,” Grumpy said, not sparing me a glance. “Irene and Cleo are waiting for us.”

Taehyung sighed and looked at me apologetically. I gave him a small smile and wave.

“I was wondering why you were all dressed up,” I offered lamely, hoping he would snatch the bait.

“Wingman for the night,” He replied, smiling brightly. “See you around, Y/N. I’ll let you know how they’re doing.”

“Taehyung,” The guy groaned, tapping his foot impatiently and staring at his watch.

“Coming, Jin,” He replied equally annoyed.

“Have fun,” I responded, turning around, and pretending to get busy.

I heard a small amount of bickering before another chime and the store was silent again.

I rubbed at my eyes and let out a huge yawn. Tonight had been boring after Taehyung had left. No one else had come in and I ended up finishing all the restocking and got a small amount of my dissertation done. I was focusing on the evolutionary functions of sauropods. So far, I was having a wonderful time discussing my theories and Dr.Lupon was kind enough to give me plenty of access to the sauropods we had in the lab. Jungkook was getting home as well.

“Hey,” I greeted, pulling my keys out of my bag.

“Feeling any better?” He asked, looking over at me.

Jungkook was a sweet guy. I met him during undergrad at a party. Wren and I were getting along great, and he invited me out. Jungkook and I got paired up for beer pong and the rest was history. For a long time, we were a trio. That was until Wren moved out of the dorms and got married, Jungkook was too busy slutting it up on campus after his big breakup with Fawn, and I became the workaholic in the group. Kendall, a girl I had met during spring break in my junior year of undergrad, was the one I saw on a semi-regular basis now. I noticed a new hickey next to the other two from last night.

“All good,” I replied. “Sorry for being a dick.”

“No worries. I actually left the guy a note so hopefully he’ll shut the fuck up.”

My eyebrows shot up in surprise. All the years we had been living here, Jungkook had never approached my neighbor about his volume control. Neither had I. I had come to terms with the lack of sleep and Jungkook hated confrontation. I knew he would never speak to 201, Jungkook had a bad speech impediment when he was anxious or upset. A note, however, was right up his alley. I could imagine what it had said and it made me smile.

“You didn’t have to do that, Kookie,” I said.

“Yeah, well, you bust your ass to be here. Don’t want that shit to fuck up your grades.”

Then he was locking himself in his apartment again. I, again, did not take it personally. Jungkook and I both had a bad habit of running away from sweet moments. Jungkook more so than me. I sighed and went inside to get ready for bed.

Like Jungkook had hoped, it was a quiet night. The night after was silent as well. Then, two weeks went by without a single sound coming from my neighbor’s apartment. And while this should have made me happy, instead all I could think about was my own anxiety. Had he moved out? Was he suffering because of me? Had Jungkook been too harsh? I knew he was crazy about sex. All of these thoughts raced through my mind once I turned off the lights.

Jungkook told me I was being stupid. The guy was quiet and that was all that mattered. And he was right. I should have been happy but I was not. Going on night sixteen, I stared at my ceiling and waited for something, anything, and nothing came.

It had been hard walking on eggshells throughout the week. I did not really know what my friend had written and how much involvement I had, and that made it even more difficult to function. I left earlier in the morning and came home later at night. I feared I would bump into him. Even though it had never happened before, the last thing I wanted was an awkward apology.

Turning over in my bed, I stared at my front door before groaning. Finally giving up on sleep, I turned on my bedside lamp and started throwing on a few layers of clothes. It had frozen over during the weekend. That was one thing I could live without- snow. Slipping on a pair of thick, fuzzy socks and my too-large snow boots, I collected my keys before locking up my place.

Insomnia plagued me at the best of times. Stressing was a totally different ballgame. Making my way down the stairs, I reached into my hoodie pocket and pulled out my tangled headphones. Kendall and Wren always poked fun at my old electronics but I paid them no mind. I would use it until it broke and was not worth fixing. It was the same reason I never paid for Spotify or Apple Music like they did. I much rather waste my money on summer expeditions and books. Putting my playlist on shuffle, I began unlocking my bike from the rack.

It had been a hard change when I first left home. I thought, as an 18-year-old girl, that the moment I left my parent’s house and went on my own adventure that I would have things figured out in no time. I laughed at myself now. God, I was so naive. The real world was hard and going Ivy League was harder. Most of the people around me were descendants or related to somebody important. The rest were exchange students who had little interest in me. My first few years at Harvard were rough and I was surprised I had managed. But every time I spoke to my family it made all of the hard work worth it. They were proud and so was I.

Now, here I was about to get my Ph.D. and still trying to figure out what I could do with myself after I left this place. My professor had offered me an adjacent faculty position but I needed to get out from my comfort zone. I wanted to see what else the world had to offer before accepting something like that. My mom thought I was crazy but I knew grandpa would be happy with my decision. Pulling up to the lab, I reminded myself that I had a lecture in the morning and I could not stay for too long.

It always amazed me how I was able to go from sneaking into this building during my sophomore year to owning a spare key. Back then, I mostly stuck to the rocks and occasionally would find myself looking over the bones. After a while, the rocks were just a suggestion. Now, I quickly let myself into the fossil room and began to wash my hands. Hygiene and care were extremely important when handling bones and I had planned on looking over that tusk again. A half an hour later is when I got the first phone call.

“Y/N,” Kendall slurred on the other side of the phone, loud music blasting in the background, and I could hear Wren laughing loudly just to the side of my friend. “Come to Grendall’s! It’s Throwback Thursday!”

Taking off my cotton gloves, I slowly stood up and began putting my things away. Even if I had no intentions of going out, I did need to start getting everything put away before somebody saw me. While it was not unallowed, most of the other students were not able to come and go as they please, so my professor had asked me to keep this a secret.

“I have class in the morning,” I replied, placing her on speakerphone while I began the careful process of putting the tusk back.

“Bitch,” It was Wren now. “You better be joking.”

I laughed, “And you’ve lost your mind if you think I’m going to that shitshow. Last time I was at Grendall’s some asshole threw his drink on me.”

“But they’re playing Usher, Y/N! Usher!”

I pursed my lips fighting back a grin. I was almost mad at myself for entertaining the idea at all, but thinking about it now it had been a while since I last went out. Kendall and Wren were both having a great time, but I was not in a party mood. By the time I got there everyone would be getting ready to leave and I would have wasted my time anyway. Declining the invitation again, I hung up before the drunk whining got any worse.

Figuring I would get home, I picked up all of the equipment and locked the door behind me. Flicking the lights off one-by-one, I yawned as the double doors to the research lab slammed behind me. Locking up, I rushed down the stairs and grabbed my bike.

The moonlight was covered by the clouds so the streets were only lit by the scattered streetlights. Securing my helmet, I contemplated grabbing some food on the way home but shook my head. I had peanut butter and bread.

It took ten minutes to ride back home. The parking lot was full and deserted. The silence creeped me out, so I quickly locked my bike up before taking the short walk back up to my flat. The stairs banged loudly into the night and I winced with each step I took. I hoped I did not wake anybody.

Walking past my neighbor’s door, I paused. Whoever they might have been had been very respectful of my boundaries. I almost felt bad for getting rid of their fun. Biting my lip, I looked at the door and sighed.

“Oh, to hell with it,” I mumbled, walking to my door.

It took no time to unlock the door. Leaving it wide open, I found my backpack easily and pulled out a sticky note. Grimacing, I almost second-guessed my plan when I caught sight of the pastel pink bunnies around the edges. Rolling my eyes, I fought the urge and got a pen from my front pocket.

Walking back outside, I stuck the note to the door and began to write.

Sorry about my friend. Do whatever you want. It’s your apartment. -203

After reinforcing the hold with some clear tape, I finally stalked back to my apartment for the rest of the night. It felt strange to give a grown man permission to have sex in his own home, but I had also thought it was weird that dinosaurs had feathers the first time I heard it. It had been my fault he thought he couldn’t, I rationalized. I was simply reminding him that he was free to make his own decisions.

Crawling into bed, I checked the time and sighed in frustration. I had class in three hours. Rolling over, I let my eyes slip shut. Whatever 201 decided to do, I would be fine with. Even if it meant I would lose some sleep.

Just on the cusp of sleep, I was awoken by a loud bang from the other side of the wall. Shooting up, I grabbed my chest in surprise. Then, almost like an eerie thriller, a shout came through the wall. Scrambling up the bed, I pressed my ear against it and waited for something else to happen.

“What are you going to do to me?” A woman said, her voice quivering.

“Whatever the fuck I want,” A man replied.

Cupping my mouth, I froze. Was this a kinky sex thing or was 201 about to murder a woman? Was that what he had been doing? Reeling, I continued to listen.

“Daddy,” The woman whined.

Immediately, I threw myself away from the wall with a disgusted exclamation. Definitely kinky sex things. Shuttering, I felt my blood run cold at the thought. I had been listening to my neighbor have sex- willingly. Not consciously, I tried to remind myself. I still felt like a pervert.

“Oh, fuck!” She shouted. “Just like that. Fuck!”

I heard a loud slap before the man chastised her for speaking out of turn. This only seemed to please her more because she was moaning and groaning. More curses and slaps came through the wall and I curled into a ball at the edge of my bed.

My annoyance was growing once more. He had not even gotten my note and he was violating me all over again. Gritting my teeth, I crawled out of my bed and got another sticky note. I doubted 201 would even notice if I left another right now. He was occupied.

I have class in the morning asshole, so keep the noise down. Other people live here. -203

Sticking the note on the door, I ripped the other one off and crumpled it in my hand. 201 and I were going to have some problems again it seems. Again, my brain attempted to remind me about how badly I felt for him earlier, but I ignored it. He broke the rules before I said he could! He’s a pig. He has a daddy kink.

I could not tell if I was angrier about the noise or the fact that my panties had grown ever so slightly damp at the thought.

Relax, princess. I’ll keep it down next time. Have fun in class, or whatever else you do. -201

Furious, I chuckled darkly. Ripping the piece of notebook paper from my door, I pulled out another sticky note.

Whatever it is I do, I’m sure it’s far more fulfilling than fucking everything that walks. -203

Sticking it to the door, I marched down the stairs in a wave of anger. Nothing could calm me down right now. Who the hell does he think he is? Jesus Christ of fucking Nazareth? Scoffing, I cracked my neck. What a joke.

I had hardly slept. Between the banging against the wall and my own anger, I had closed my eyes for thirty minutes before my alarm had gone off. I would, hopefully, get some sleep in between my afternoon and evening classes. I told myself that I would not go to the lab tonight. Thinking about 201, I grit my teeth. I could not even be sure of that if the man-whore decided to bring home another banshee.

He called me princess.

Breathing through my nostrils, I unlocked my bike and put on my helmet. I heard my name being called behind me and turned around.

Taehyung waved me down, a large, square smile on his face. Forcing a smile, I waved back at him. I would have to get my temper in check before I spoke with him. Another thing 201 had ruined for me, I said to myself.

He was dripping in sweat, his gray tank top sticking to his chest and shorts hardly moving from the amount of water on them. He was wearing a hat today, something I had rarely seen, and I swooned. He looked so nice with his hair out of his face. Coming to a stop in front of me, Taehyung looked at my face with worry.

“Didn’t sleep last night?” He asked, taking an ear bud out.

I shook my head. I decided against telling him about my neighbor's issues. We were not close enough for me to feel comfortable discussing daddy-kinks. Even if they were my neighbor’s.

Not that I’m against it, I thought to myself.

“I stayed out too late at the lab,” I replied. Half truths were better than whole lies. “Just lost track of time.”

“What’s your major again?” He asked, leaning against the bike rack.

Checking my watch, I was happy I still had time to chat before class. I had left earlier than I thought. Jungkook was ditching this morning. He and the girls had too much fun last night.

“Paleontology. I’m getting my Ph.D. "

He whistled jokingly and sent a little wink my way.

“Smart girl, huh?” He chuckled. “I went to Harvard for about two months before dropping out.”

Grabbing hold of this information, I grinned at him. I was glad to be learning more about the guy. He had been on my radar for a while now, so breaking some ice was always a good thing. Maybe, if I learned enough, I would feel more comfortable asking him out.

“What do you do for work?”

“Personal trainer,” He shrugged. “I was going to be a dietitian, but I wasn’t cut out for college. You’re at Harvard, right?”

I nodded, “I’ve been here since undergrad.”

Taehyung smiled, seemingly impressed. Looking around, he put his hands on his hips. An awkward silence sat between us, and I glanced at my watch again. I had five minutes left of this conversation. I would be late otherwise.

“Hey,” He finally said, a thoughtful look on his face. “Which building do you live in?”

I pointed to the one behind him. Taehyung smiled brightly and said he lived in the same one. After a minute of talking about how long we had each stayed, another small lapse in conversation happened. It was hard to talk to him without putting my foot in my mouth. I doubted he really wanted to hear about the things that I liked, and I was clueless about what he was into.

“Do you want to get dinner with me?”

Snapping back to the conversation, I had no idea how to respond. That was very sudden. Taehyung seemed pleased by my reaction, no doubt giving away how nervous I was, and I looked down at my shoes. I hated myself for wearing slippers.

“Uh, yeah,” I nodded, faking nonchalance. “Sure. When?”

“Next week?” He asked. “I’m pretty busy right now.”

“Yeah, totally.” I nodded, dumbly. “I’m free every day except Thursdays.”

“Next Friday? Around 6?”

I shook my head. “I have work that day. I’m off Sunday, though.”

Taehyung thought for a moment before grinning.

“I can make Sunday work. We can get lunch.”

After agreeing, we exchanged numbers and went separate ways. Taehyung had to meet with a client in a few minutes and I needed to get to class. Riding away, I was dumbfounded by my own feelings. I had not felt as excited about the idea as I thought I would. He had not seemed very interested in me before, and even asking me out had not really been all that flattering. Chalking it up to over thinking, I pushed my negative thoughts away and focused on the fact that I had a date next week. Wren was going to flip.

Arriving home, I found another note left on my door. Rolling my eyes, I was getting fed up with the childish game of telephone we were playing. I had started it, a thought that made me feel shameful, but if he had something to say to me then he should just go for it. I grabbed the note.

Not everything. Just the things I like. Sorry again. I will try to be quieter. -201

I found a smiling creeping up my face. I was acting like a complete spaz. Getting a sticky note, I replied.

Enjoy yourself. But not at 4 in the morning. Especially on Wednesdays. I have a class to teach. Sorry for acting like a Karen. -203

Sticking it to the door, I nodded. Hopefully this would mend the bridge. He can still have his fun and I won’t lose my mind. Taking my laptop out of my bag, I decided to get some homework done and continue writing my thesis. My workload was heavy, and I knew I would start feeling the pressure the most after winter break, but for now my thesis was smooth sailing. I was finished with my research thus far, and I only had to sit down, write, cite, and iron out the details. I knew Wren was already losing her mind over hers, but I trusted Jimin to be there for her. They were a power couple if I had ever seen one.

I gave up after four hours. My homework was finished, but I had gotten stuck on my paper again. I was getting caught up on the details when I should be writing. Putting my laptop away, I decided to go get some phone when my phone chimed.

Unknown: Hey is this Y/N?

Raising my eyebrow, I replied hesitantly.

Me: Yes. Who’s this?

Unknown: It’s Tae! Haha

Unknown: Sorry for texting so late. I just got home

Breathing a sigh of relief, I typed back a response.

Me: Oh hey

Me: No worries. I thought you were one of those telemarketers

Tae: Nope. Just Taehyung lol

Tae: Are you still good for Sunday?

Frowning, I stepped outside and shut my door. Why was he asking? We had just seen each other this morning. Standing, I replied and waited.

Me: Yeah? Why?

I heard a door open nearby but ignored it. Nibbling on my thumb nail, I grew anxious. Had he changed his mind? Stopping my thoughts in their tracks, I immediately told myself that this was not a big deal. I was not that desperate. I was lonely, but I knew my worth. Taehyung would not make me lose sight of that.

Tae: Just checking

“Uh,” Someone cleared their throat from beside me. “Excuse me?”

Looking over, I blinked. The guy was cute, insanely so, with pretty skin and wild black hair. He looked like he just woke up if the wrinkles in his shirt were anything to go by. Pushing back the thin, gold-rimmed glasses resting on his nose, the man smiled nervously.

“I’m Namjoon. 201.”

Mouth hanging open, I looked him over a bit more thoroughly this time. I had never seen my neighbor before and I could see why women liked him. He had an aura that surrounded him. Still, when I noticed he had dimples I could not get him being called ‘daddy’ out of my head. So, this was the nympho?

“Y/N, 203,” I replied, voice small.

My phone chimed again.

Tae: Where’d you go?

Nose wrinkling in discomfort, I did not know how to reply. It had been less than five minutes since he had sent the last message. My discontent from earlier returned and I wondered if I had made a good choice agreeing to the date. Remembering 201, I looked back at him.

“Sorry,” I shook my head, my face still distorted. “This guy is being weird.”

He shook his head, a lazy grin on his face.

“No worries, I get those types all the time,” He ran his fingers through his hair and looked out into the night. “Just wanted to properly apologize about the noise. And the note. I was being passive aggressive.”

Taehyung forgotten, I shook my head and hands at the same time.

“No harm, no foul,” I replied. “I kinda started it anyway. Sorry for calling you an asshole. And then a fuck boy.”

He pulled a face, “You didn’t call me a fuck boy.”

“I insinuated it.”

My phone chimed again.

“You can get that,” He nodded to my hand.

Leaning against the iron fence, Namjoon took a deep breath and closed his eyes. Following suit, I turned my back to the fence and looked at the text chain.

Tae: Y/N???????

Me: I’m getting something to eat. Sorry for not replying sooner.

The reply was instantaneous.

Tae: No worries :)

Tae: I miss you

Thoroughly creeped out, I again found myself at a loss. Screenshotting the conversation, I sent it to Kendall with a slew of question marks. I saw the check marks beside it before the bubble popped up. Kendall had always been great about texting back fast.

KC: uhhh wtf?

KC: block him

Before I could reply to Kendall, Taehyung had already sent another text.

Tae: Can you send me a picture?

Shocked, I blurted out, “What the fuck?”

Namjoon looked at me, an amused look on his face.

“Trouble in paradise?”

Shaking my head, I found myself speaking without much thought.

“He’s a guy I’ve known for a bit. He asked me out this morning and he’s acting weird.”

Namjoon took a step closer to me, looked to see if I was okay with it, and stood right next to me. I showed him the messages easily, my own confusion making my normal walls shattered. I knew the guy was a daddy-dom for Christ’s sake. I think he could see the creepy messages Taehyung was sending me. It would level the playing field.

“Damn,” He whispered, obviously wanting to laugh. “He’s really fucking this up.”

“What does he mean by ‘pictures?’” I asked. “I’m trying to give him the benefit of the doubt.”

“Don’t,” Namjoon quickly interjected. “He’s pushy and clingy. It’ll only get worse if you pay attention to it. I’d block him.”

Nodding, I decided to send a gentle let down before blocking his number.

Me: I think we should cancel Sunday. You’re making me really uncomfortable and I don’t want to see you anymore.

Pressing the block button, I sighed in defeat. That had been the first date I had been asked on in months and it went to shit before it even started. Dejected, I told Kendall that I did. I was not very hungry anymore. Putting my phone in my jacket pocket, I decided to go back inside.

“Hey,” Namjoon said, voice gentle. “Don’t let that guy ruin your night. You were about to go somewhere, right?”

Nodding, I kicked the concrete and pushed off the railing.

“I don’t think I’m all that hungry anymore,” I replied. “I’m going to go inside. Thanks for apologizing and have all the sex you want.”

Namjoon laughed despite himself and came to walk beside me.

“Order some takeout,” He argued. “By the time it gets here you’ll be hungry again.”

He was only being nice because we were rocky, I knew that. Still, I felt touched that he had even tried to make me feel better. My friends were great, but they were all living their lives. No one really had time to help me with mine most of the time. It was nice, friend or not, to have someone looking out for me. I nodded.

“I will,” I put my hand on my door knob. “Do you want anything?”

The olive branch had already been extended at this point. I had let him read my texts, and I was appreciative of his efforts to make me feel better. The least I could do was get him some fried rice. Namjoon smiled at me.

“Sesame chicken or pepper steak. Whichever they have right now.”

I nodded and smiled back. “Gotcha.”

I went inside and closed the door. I heard Namjoon go inside and found myself smiling once again. He was sweet. A very sweet, kind, nymphomaniac with a daddy-kink. Desperate to get that idea out of my head, I called the Chinese restaurant down the street and ordered our food.

I left a tray of sesame chicken and pepper steak outside of his door with a note on it.

Not everything. Just the things you like. -203

I knocked and went back inside before he opened the door. Curling up on my bed, I turned on my tv and waited to hear his door open. When his laugh bounced through the hallway, I smiled over my plate of fried rice.

Putting another container of cat food on the shelf, I sighed into the phone. Kendall had done nothing but laugh at the entire ordeal with Taehyung. Wren, who was laughing right alongside her, struggled to catch her breath.

“I’m sorry,” She wheezed, “This is just too much.”

I rubbed my eyes, frustrated and tired. If I had known all this phone call was just going to be getting made fun of I would not have picked it up. My silence must have clued one of them in since the laughing had stopped a few seconds later.

“You are okay, though, right?” Kendall asked.

“Yeah,” I replied, quietly. “Just… disappointed.”

“Don’t let him make you feel bad about yourself,” Wren said, her voice far away from the phone. “You deserve better than a ‘u up?” text.”

“Yeah, he’s a fucking loser,” Kendall agreed.

Hearing the bell ring, I told the girls I had to go and promised to call them back once I was done with the customer. Putting the box of cat food to the side, I stood up and adjusted my clothes. Putting on my best customer service smile, I stepped onto the main floor.

“Welcome to Adrian’s!” I called out.

My steps flattered once I saw Jungkook swaying near the register. Confused, I checked my watch and realized that it was getting very close to closing. I had not noticed the time flying. Dropping the act, I let myself look as grumpy as I felt.

He was obviously drunk. Head tilted back and a shit-eating grin on his face, Jungkook’s eyes were closed tightly. One look at him and I was already calling Kendall back. The two of them had been fooling around on-and-off since June and I was not in the mood for the walk of shame.

“That was quick,” She answered.

“Come get Jungkook,” I sighed. “He’s blasted and I have to finish putting this cat food away.”

I heard ruffling from the other side.

“He’s at the store?”

I nodded, “Yeah. I’ll keep him company while we wait.”

“We’ll be there in five,” Wren replied, her voice much closer now. “Kendall’s getting some barf bags just in case.”

Walking closer to the drunk man, I shook my head. I remembered when Jungkook had never even touched a drink before. Now it was difficult to find a time when he was sober. I wished I could do more for him, but it was hard to tell where I stood in that regard. We had known each other for years now, but I still knew very little about who he was. We had grown apart after Fawn and never really got back on track.

“Do you think they’ll ever just be together?” I asked absentmindedly.

Kendall was good for Jungkook. She evened him out. Where he was argumentative and overly lax about everything, she was responsible and willing to listen. Kendall always took Jungkook and his moods in stride without much complaint. I knew there was love there, but I was no fool to believe it was a healthy one. Jungkook needed to get his shit together and earn Kendall.

“Maybe,” Wren replied. “If Jungkook gets a therapist and quits the bottle.”

Kendall called out in the background, but I was unable to make it out. Wren and I said our goodbyes, and I placed my hand on Jungkook’s shoulder. Cracking open an eye, Jungkook’s smile grew wide as he found me. Unimpressed, I kept my impression impassive.

“Hey,” He slurred, tripping over nothing and catching himself.

“Hello, Jungkook,” I sighed, steadying him under my hands. “Long night?”

He nodded his head like a toddler with a stupid smile on his face. He looked his age tonight. It broke my heart as much as it warmed it. It was always nice to see him carefree and having fun. The guy was born to demand crowds with a nice smile, but I also knew what he was like when he was not drunk. Shy, meek, and soft spoken- someone that he hated. I missed that kid. We got along a lot more.

“I want to hear about dinosaurs,” He said, voice way too loud and slurred for the otherwise quiet store. “I want you to tell me about dinosaurs.”

Frowning, I helped to move him closer to the counter so he could lean against it. Jungkook enjoyed my stories. He was one of the few guys I knew that seemed excited about my brain rather than taken aback. It was unfortunate we had never been interested in each other. Jungkook would have been a nice change of pace at one point in time. Looking at him now, though, I doubt we would have ever been able to make it past whatever this was. I did not take shit like this. I did not know how Kendall did, but a part of me was happy about it.

“What do you want to know?” I asked, taking a step away from him.

Leaning against the counter, Jungkook struggled to keep his eyes open. He looked so tired. Fawn had destroyed every bit of innocence Jungkook had. First love, first heartbreak, first betrayal- Fawn had done it all. From cheating, to verbal abuse, and all the way to hitting Jungkook in public. It was never hard to understand why Jungkook had sunk so low. It was just hard to understand why he never thought he could climb himself back up.

“What’s new?” He laughed.

Smiling sadly, I thought about the question for a second and tried to pick out the most exciting piece of news. The tusk was the most exciting thing in my life right now, but maybe not so cool to a layman.

“There was a new dinosaur discovered in Utah,” I finally replied. “It’s a beaked guy that’s about 99-million-years-old. They’re calling him Iani Smithi.”

Jungkook snorted obnoxiously, “They named it Ian Smith?”

Laughing along with him, it was easy to forget about his issues. The two of us used to do this sort of thing all the time. He would come into Adrian’s with all of his books and we would shoot the shit for hours. Jungkook was a good study buddy even though we were in completely different fields. He was like the baby brother I never had.

“He’s named after a Roman God and the guy who found him,” I chuckled.

“There’s a God named Ian?”

I raised an eyebrow and waved my hand, “Technically, it’s Ianus.”

“So Ian?” He giggled.

Rolling my eyes, I smiled fondly. Glancing out of the large, glass windows I saw Kendall’s Jeep parking across the street. Knowing our conversation was about to be over, I decided to indulge him a little. He looked happy tonight.

“We can call him Ian, I guess.”

Jungkook made a happy sound. Kendall got out of her four-wheel-drive and briefly looked both ways before crossing. Her hair was up and out of her face with a dark colored headband keeping her blonde bangs out of her face. I liked the pajama shorts she was wearing and made a mental note to ask her about them later. The bell chimed when she walked through the door and she found Jungkook immediately.

Putting on a big, sly grin, Kendall sauntered up to the tall man and wrapped her arms around his neck. Jungkook melted into her with ease and sighed in content. He looked even more tired now that she was here, but I thought it was a good sign. Maybe he will sleep tonight.

“Lets go you big baby,” She cooed, kissing his cheek.

Jungkook nodded in a daze and followed behind her. They were holding hands. Turning toward me, Kendall gave me a smile and wave before leaving. I waved her off and went back to the cat food. She had her hands full with the kid so I would not hold it against her.

Walking home, I got caught in the rain and had to run the rest of the two blocks it took me to get home. No one else had come in and I hoped it would stay that way. I was worried Taehyung would show up and I’d be alone. Maybe he was busy? Did not matter, I was just happy he was leaving me alone.

Racing up the stairs, I almost slipped but caught myself before I face-planted the concrete. Cursing, I grumbled as I walked the last set of stairs. A black eye would be the cherry on top of the already shit night.

Wren had messaged me to let me know that Jungkook was alright. It was a relief but did not make my discomfort go away. He was getting worse. I wondered if Kendall knew about the hickies I had been seeing. It was none of my business, I said to myself. They were a strange duo.

Getting to my door, I saw a small box sitting in front of it. Pulling out my phone, I turned on my flashlight so I could see better in the dark hallway. 201 was written across the top of it bringing a smile to my face. Shaking my head, I picked up the box and unlocked my door.

Stripping out of my wet clothes, I threw it into the pile in the corner I needed to take to the laundromat. After taking a hot shower and going through my nighttime routine, I finally took the box and brought it to my bed. Ripping the top open, I was confused to see another box inside of it. Lifting it, I gasped.

It was a small, Mosasaurus fossil building kit. It was obviously made from Legos, but a different company had made it so they were simply labeled ‘building bricks.’ How did he know I liked dinosaurs in the first place? Looking inside the box again I saw a folded paper at the bottom.

Apparently one of my colleagues knows you. I said you were my neighbor and he said the two of you had gone on a dig together years ago. You are also on his fiance’s shit list, by the way. Didn’t peg you to be the homewrecking type. Closested bad girl? Anyway, I saw this at the museum souvenir shop. Take it as my thanks for the food. Let me see it when it’s done. -Joon

Laughing loudly, Dave Powell’s face came to mind along with his fiance. Jenna Marcel was a girl from our freshman biology class. During undergrad, she and I were not friends but were friendly enough to greet one another and make small talk. Cut to our junior year, Jungkook and Jimin had dragged me to a frat party to celebrate exams being over. I was sloppy drunk and dancing with Jimin until a man, who inebriated me thought was good-looking but was not when I could think straight, got in between us. I ended up making out with him and Jenna found us like that. Apparently, it had been her boyfriend. She had nothing but bad things to say about me ever since and made it her mission to run a smear campaign anytime I was mentioned.

Mood thoroughly lifted, I tried to think if I had ever heard of Namjoon before our meeting the other night. He was a blank to me, but if he worked with Dave then we were in similar fields. I could guess anthropology like Dave, but I would ask to confirm later. Jenna and I worked closely together most of the time as we were both in paleontology, but no one really liked her very much. Too much gossiping and a lot less work getting done in her office. Jenna never really bothered me all that much.

Putting the model kit down on my nightstand, I crawled up my bed toward the wall. Pressing my ear against the wall, I listened but to no avail. It was silent in Namjoon’s apartment. Deciding to test my luck, I raised my hand and knocked on the wall.

“Yeah?” A voice called out a few seconds later.

Jumping, I covered my mouth to keep the surprised shriek in.

“Uh,” I choked before clearing my voice. “Thanks for the Mosasaurus.”

“What is it?” He asked, his voice much closer to the wall now, and I wondered if he looked like I did. Smiling, I leaned my forehead against the rough wall and closed my eyes. I would be able to talk freely for a second time tonight. The feeling was ecstasy.

“It was an aquatic squamate reptile from the late Cretaceous. It was my favorite dinosaur as a kid.”

“What’s that all mean?”

Turning around, I rested my back against the wall.

“It was a really big sea lizard,” I clarified, a small smile on my face.

Namjoon laughed, “Like a dragon?”

Smile growing wider, I replied.

“Just without the fire-breathing and wings.”

“And it’s in the water,” He pointed out.

“There’s sea dragons,” I argued. “What about sea serpents?”

Namjoon laughed again, “Touche.”

A comfortable silence fell between us. It was strange to feel so comfortable with someone like Namjoon. Last week he was the nymphomaniac next door and now we were talking dinosaurs. This was new for me, but it helped ease the loneliness. Namjoon was an easy guy. I knew he liked sesame chicken, sex, and felt comfortable enough with me to buy me a model fossil kit. I wondered if he was lonely, too.

“Are you hungry?” He suddenly asked.

“I could eat,” I replied, more aware of my hunger than I had been before.

I really needed to get better about eating more often.

“There’s a 24/7 taco place around the corner if you want to go.”

“What about the rain?” I asked, not wanting to go back out into the storm.

A long stretch of silence went by.

“I have ramen,” Namjoon finally said. “You could come over if you want.”

Laughing, I decided to be a bit playful.

“Is that what you ask all of your girls?”

I could hear the smile in his voice.

“Only the ones I like.”

I laughed, “So you like me now?”

“I’ve liked you since you put that note on my door.”

Sobering up, I froze. Heart racing, I covered my face and smiled into my hand. He was very forward, but I was not interested in becoming another notch in his bedpost. No matter how cute he was.

But you could be the woman calling him daddy, my mind screamed at me. Stomach warming, I could see it now. I would be on my knees, tears streaming down my face, and Namjoon towering over me. I rubbed my thighs together.

“I’m not interested in a fling,” I said, not even convinced of it myself. It would be so easy. “I’m the monogamous type.”

I heard him hum.

“So am I,” Namjoon replied. “I’ve been hooking up recently, but I do like relationships.”

“What are you asking me, 201?” I cut to the chase, wanting to get to the point already.

“I was asking you to come over,” Namjoon’s voice started to drift away from the wall. “Now I’m asking if I can come over so we can build that sea lizard together.”

His voice was very far away from the wall now and I realized far too late that he was walking toward his door. Scrambling off my bed, I dashed to my dresser to find a pair of pants. I never wore them when I was going to sleep. Stumbling and jumping into the most unflattering pair of pajama pants I owned (why hadn’t I done laundry sooner?) just as a loud knock came to my door. Running, I smoothed down my clothes and messed with my hair a bit before opening it.

“Hey neighbor,” Namjoon greeted me as if we had not been having a conversation before. “Would you like to hang out?”

“Is this a date?” I asked, looking everywhere but his face.

“No,” Namjoon replied. “Just two people getting to know each other.”

Looking at him now, I raised an eyebrow. He had literally asked me to “eat ramen” with him less than five minutes ago. Softening, Namjoon shrugged. Scoffing at him, I crossed my arms over my chest.

“If you’re ‘courting’ me,” I made the quotations with my fingers, “I want to lay some ground rules.”

“Go for it,” Namjoon replied.

“Rule number one:-” I lifted my pointer finger, “-no hook ups. I can literally hear you and it’s weird. Rule number two: I expect this to be a mutual thing. I will only put in the amount of effort you do. And three-” I looked him in the eyes, “-I don’t like liars.”

“So,” Namjoon began counting with his fingers, “We’re not seeing other people, we’re going to do heart and flowers, and lying is punishable by death?”

“Are you okay with that?” I asked.

I thought it was only fair to be as clear as possible. I had expectations, and Namjoon had said he was hooking up right now. I was not fine with something like that, but it did not mean we could not still be friendly. Dating or not, I had figured we would get along just fine.

“I can do that,” He nodded with a smile. “But I just want to focus on being cool. I rush through this shit a lot.”

I opened my door wider.

“Join the club,” I grinned. “Come in.”

Wren tossed her hair over her shoulder, smacking my face with it. Shoving her forward, she laughed and walked up to the counter. I stood behind her and pointed at the flavor I wanted.

“I’ll get a scoop of raspberry sorbet in a cup,” I told the young girl taking our order. “No toppings, please.”

“And I want two scoops of Cookie Monster on a waffle cone,” Wren said. “Chocolate drizzle and marshmallows.”

Scrunching my nose up, I gave Wren a look. Shrugging her shoulders at me and paid for the both of us. We walked to the pick up window and waited.

“I thought you were on a diet?” I asked.

Wren’s mother had been complaining about her weight and it had finally gotten to her head. Jimin told her he thought she looked just fine, but family pressures always made Wren cave. She said it was just the way her family worked, but I knew how hard that sort of thing can be. My family and I were getting better at communicating even with my father’s not-so-silent disapproval of my life choices. Wren’s mom was like that but ten times more intense.

“I gave up after a week,” She shrugged. “My mom’s just going to have to deal with me putting on a few extra pounds.”

“Why is she so obsessed about it anyway?”

Wren shrugged, “It’s a big deal in China so she’s projecting it onto me. I know it’s coming from a good place, but that doesn’t mean I have to deal with her insecurities. I learned that from someone special.”

Fixing me with a pointed look, I smiled shyly. She always said I made her more confident, but I did not believe her. Kendall had done more for Wren’s self love journey than I ever did. I just told her she was her own person six years ago and she acts like I made all of her parental issues go away.

“So who’s this guy you’re seeing?” Wren suddenly switched topics.

Grabbing our order, she handed me my sorbet and the two of us sat at one of the small tables on the other side of the ice cream parlor.

“You remember 201?” I asked, taking a spoonful of sorbet and stuffing it into my mouth. “Turns out he’s much nicer than I gave him credit for.”

Wren squealed. Her mind had gone to sex, I could see the mischievous glint in her eye, and I tried to hide my growing embarrassment. Out of all my friends, Wren had the most experience with good partners and pushed me to expand my horizons, and she knew all about the fiend next door. As if I could see the wheels in her head turned, I braced myself for the conversation to come.

“Who is he?” She asked, coming closer and dropping her voice.

This place was popular amongst students and she was overly paranoid about someone listening in.

“Namjoon Kim,” I replied, biting my lip to stop the smile from taking over my face.

Things between us had been going well. Namjoon was kind and considerate, and like he had said, we had only been acting like friends. Between a late night run to get tacos together and staying up to talk over the phone while I was holed up in the lab, I was happy with the way things were headed. I liked him more than I thought I would.

“I didn’t realize Namjoon was a nympho!” Wren exclaimed, her voice causing a few heads to turn.

Reaching out, I smacked Wren on the top of her head. She pouted childishly, but relented. Sending a few apologetic smiles to the unfortunate souls overhearing our conversation, I glared at Wren in between each one. All I got was a noncommittal shoulder shrug.

“Are you trying to embarrass me?” I whispered harshly.

“You’re the one who’s dropping bombs,” She replied.

“No, I’m trying to have a conversation with you. Very different.”

Wren burst into laughter. Unable to stop myself, I joined her quiet chuckles. I could feel people looking at us, but it only made me laugh harder.

“I can’t believe I called him a nympho in public,” Wren wheezed, hiding behind her hands.

“You didn’t just say it,” I laughed, “You yelled it from the rooftops.”

Shaking her head, Wren took a few large licks of her ice cream.

“He’s a nice dude,” She changed subjects quickly. “We’ve gone on a few digs together. He’s as big of a nerd as you are. You should definitely ask him about Greece- he’s all about Classical art.”

Namjoon was a fan of the arts. The two of us had gone to the Museum of Fine Arts over the weekend, and were planning on stopping by the campus art museum sometime soon. He wanted me to take him on a tour of the Natural History museum first. According to him, he needed a “proper” dinosaur tour since he had never worked with a paleontologist on a dig.

“I’ve heard about Egypt and Kenya already, but I’ll keep Greece in mind,” I replied, eating another spoonful. “What excavation should I bring up? I’ve had fun with all of mine.”

Wren put a finger on her chin, “You haven’t left the U.S?”

I shook my head, “I went to Manitoba during undergrad. I didn’t find much though. The group I was with weren’t as excited about digging as I was. All of my good digs have been in the States.”

“Why didn’t you go to Mongolia with Lupon?” She asked, her first scoop finished.

“You can’t keep anything you find,” I replied. “What’s the fun in that?”

Wren and I were more closely related in fields. Both she and Namjoon were archaeologists and traveled all over the world during the summer. The two of us met during an excavation in Colorado. Dr.Lupon and two other professors from the anthropology department had a large excavation planned for the undergrads. Wren was helping the team dig up some possible fossils, but they had been unsuccessful. My small group was spread out and looking around, but my eyes caught something in the dirt. I had asked her to help me get it up, and we ended up finding a Stegosaurus plate that had broken. The two of us had found the first fossils of the trip and were attached at the hip for the rest of the summer.

“I could talk to him about Dinosaur Ridge.”

Wren nodded enthusiastically, “Don’t forget about Mesa Verde.”

We had gone to the Mesa Verde National Park for a two week tour, study, and small excavation after we were done in Dinosaur Ridge. I had a lot of fun with Wren, but I could not recall too much about Mesa Verde. The architecture was beautiful but it was the most boring excavation I had been a part of to date. I never really counted Manitoba.

“I have a good feeling about this one,” Wren said. “From what I know about him, Namjoon’s a nice guy. A little abrasive at times, but nothing you can’t handle.”

I scoffed, “Jenna already got her ‘homewrecker’ storyline in his head.”

“She’s still not over that?” Wren laughed, voice higher in pitch.

“She did catch her boyfriend’s tongue in my mouth,” I reasoned.

I winced. Namjoon had never brought that up again, but it was still bothering me. Not only was it a bad light to be in- it was just not true. Dave had gotten over it pretty quickly, and Jenna had never had any mean words to say about him. She had ruined two possible relationships for me before and I was afraid it might work on Namjoon if they were together long enough.

“Didn’t they get married?”

“Yeah,” I nodded and took the last bite of my sorbet.

“Then why is she still complaining about it?” She wondered out loud.

“She needs everyone to know that I’m a homewrecker,” I giggled.

It really was petty at our age, but that never seemed to stop her before.

“But no home was wrecked?”

“Want to hear something even worse?” I leaned in and covered the side of my mouth.

Wren leaned in quickly, her eyes wide in excitement. She was such a gossiper. I almost felt bad for telling her, I knew it would be talked about at every function where it was acceptable. Jenna had called me every name in the book, though, so I felt little sympathy for her. Now we could call it even.

“He proposed on both knees,” I snorted.

“What?” Wren exclaimed. “Like begging?”

“No, like Shane Dawson.”

Wren and I both laughed loudly. I laughed so hard my stomach began to hurt and it was difficult to breathe. Wren, on the other hand, had a terrible habit of hurting herself when she laughed. From falling out of chairs to quite literally throwing herself on the floor, she always seemed to leave with a few bumps and bruises. This time she simply banged her knee into the table.

“And she’s pressed?” Wren managed in between bouts of laughter.

I howled like a hyena and felt tears coming to my eyes. I could see the picture vividly in my mind. Morgan, a girl from my department, and I were in Utah doing research when she started laughing before turning her phone so I could see the Instagram post. Dave was wearing flip flops, khakis, and an ill-fitting Baby Yoda shirt, his back perfectly straight and lifted by his knees. Jenna had her hands over her mouth and was crying. I began to laugh even harder. I needed to see if Morgan still had a screenshot.

“Jen, sorry to tell you, babe, but no one wants to wreck that home.” Wren wheezed.

“He was wearing a Baby Yoda shirt.”

Wren snorted.

“I’m done. I’ve heard it all.”

I wiped the tears off my face and began to catch my breath. Wren and I always had a great time together, it was the main reason we got so close, and no one made me laugh the way she did. I sent a text to Morgan and continued my steady breathing. We would both be in stitches the moment we saw it.

“Hey, Y/N?” Wren was suddenly serious.

“Yeah?” I breathed out, looking back at her face. I wiped the remaining tears from my cheeks.

“Anyone would be lucky to have you, you know that right?”

I looked away shyly.

“Of course, Wren,” I replied. “I got over that hill.”

She nodded, “Just making sure.”

My phone chimed distracting us both. Waving Wren over, the tense moment was gone. Scooting her chair to my side of the table, I quickly pressed on Morgan’s text. Underneath a few crying-laughing emojis was the photo. Wren took my phone from my hands, her hand cupping her mouth, and another loud wave of laughter overtook the table.

Staring up at my ceiling, I could not fall asleep. I had tried everything. A warm bath, turning off all of the lights and sounds, and even a warm glass of milk. Nothing was working. Bundled under my blanket, I was happy to be safe from the frosty air nipping away at my nose.

The building’s air conditioning was broken and had done nothing but blow freezing cold air. I had pulled out my space heater but it was not very helpful. The vent was right above me and blasting on full force.

Rolling over, I finally gave in and picked up my phone from the charger. I was going crazy just laying here. Scrolling, I replied to a message from Kendall before finding Namjoon’s contact. He had gone out of town yesterday to visit his family in Maine. His parents retired there and his sister was in town from New Zealand.

Glancing at the time, I second guessed myself. He could be sleeping, but I knew his sleep schedule was even worse than mine was. He had afternoon classes and late night projects he did with his friends. They were beginning to plan their summer trip for the year, and it bothered me how much I felt jealous of him. Namjoon would have another four years after this when he came back for his doctorate. I outgrew this place in just six months. The thought bothered me far more than it should have.

Me: Hey

It was still hard to decide what I truly wanted. While this part of me wanted to go off on an adventure, another loved the security that came along with Harvard. I knew everyone, taught plenty, and would always have my once a year dig. The unknown was just that. I had such a ride these last twelve years, and it felt bittersweet to see them go by. Seeing my freshman dorm for the first time felt like yesterday.

Joon: You should be sleeping

Joon: You have a morning class to teach, Ms.Studious

I laughed quietly.

Out of everything I would miss about this place, Namjoon was quickly making his way to the top of the list. I had already had security in my friendships. They would forever be constants in my life. I knew wherever I went that they would always be there. I could visit in the winter and they would fly out in the summer. We would always find each other.

Namjoon was a different sort. We were still navigating the waters of our relationship. I knew we were more than friends, but no moves had been made to become more than that. No kisses, or hugs, or hand holding. There was no goal or finish line in sight. Come May he could decide that he was not willing to put up with me anymore, and it still felt too unstable to talk about it with him. What would he want?

Me: It’s too cold and I can’t sleep

The reply was quick.

Joon: They still haven’t fixed that?

Me: Nope

Me: Apparently my room is the worst. Jungkook said his place barely felt any different and yours was already broken to begin with. This sucks.

Shivering again, I grumbled to myself. I hated this complex. I was the most excited about moving out and getting something nicer. I never bothered while I was enrolled since the rent was cheap and it was something affordable. I could pay rent and still stash away money- something that could not be said for anywhere else in Massachusetts.

Joon: You could sleep at my place

I smiled. He had offered his apartment the day he left, but I refused. At the time it had not been as bad. I was also unsure why he was giving me permission in the first place. Was it as a friend? Or was it as a man who was interested in me? It was impossible to know and I was too anxious to ask. He was wearing these ripped denim jeans that were driving me crazy.

Joon: I’d feel more comfortable if you did

It was a rare occasion to have a sentimental comment made by the guy. Wanting to fish a bit more, I decided to bait him just a little. With a slick grin, I replied.

Me: 🤨

Joon: You have to teach a geology class at 7am

Joon: So you need to sleep

Joon: I’m doing this for your students, 203

I giggled.

Me: Whatever you say, 201

A call screen popped up before I could be happy with my reply. Namjoon never called me. Taking a few breaths, I calmed my excitement down before answering.

“Hello?”

“You calling me a liar?” Namjoon replied, his amusement evident.

Trying to relax, I snuggled deeper into my blankets.

“And if I am?” I bit back.

I always loved flirtatious and playful, and it was rare that Namjoon was neither one. He came on very strongly without ever laying a finger on me. It was a surprising turn on.

He laughed, “Oh, you’ll see.”

“Will I?” I drawled.

He was a fan of hard to get. I never pulled away too much, and it was only when we were messing around, but I could tell he liked it. I doubted anything I had done since the first note I’d left on his door excited him the same way.

“I’ll be home tomorrow, 203,” Namjoon warned. “Don’t start some shit you can’t finish.”

I scoffed, “You called me, 201.”

Namjoon chuckled. He sounded happier than usual. We talked about his family a lot, and I knew how much he loved them. His little sister was more distant than he was, but the two of them got along really well when she was home. He had to keep the peace so she and their mother would not argue. His father was a quiet man with a warm personality, while his mother was the polar opposite. He was much closer to her, but loved them both. I could imagine how glad he was to spend time with them.

“I miss you.”

Stunned, it took me a second to reply.

“I miss you, too.”

And I meant it. Things were way too quiet without him around. I had never noticed just how isolated I had really become over the last few years. Wren and I used to spend every day together until she met Jimin. Kendall took up her space for a while, but her job was very demanding of her time so that faded as well. Jungkook was too focused on school and drinking to care about anybody else. My colleagues did not really count as friends since I never saw them outside of school, and I was not someone who got out as much as I used to. The world was very quiet until he moved in.

“Sorry if that was weird,” He quickly interjected, mistaking my silence for something else.

“No, no,” I rushed, sitting up. “Just unexpected. I don’t mind it.”

The cold air hit me all at once, and I quickly plopped back down. Wrapping the blanket around me tightly, I accidently let out a rush of air. My teeth began chattering.

“I won’t tell you what to do,” Namjoon was calm again. “I have a spare key underneath the mat you’re free to use.”

“Thank you,” I replied even if I did not plan on using it.

My graduation date came back to my mind. I had applied to a few places already, but had either been turned down or lost interest in the position after the interview. The only place that was left were a few museums that I was very interested in. One in New York was the most exciting prospect, and I had heard they were going to need new staff this coming year, but no job postings had been listed yet. Dr.Lupon said she should get me the job if I really wanted it, but I was not sure how comfortable I felt about that either.

“What’s on your mind?” Namjoon spoke, breaking me away from my thoughts.

“Huh?” I replied, dumbly.

“I could hear you thinking through the phone,” He joked. “Maybe you’ll sleep if you get it off your chest.”

Humming, I thought about it for a minute. It was scary to talk about this stuff with Namjoon, I was worried about where it would hurt us, but I was also afraid of where we would go if I didn’t.

“I’m just nervous about graduation,” I finally settled on. I was not ready to dive into everything with him yet. “I’ve been here for so long, you know?”

“How long have you been at Harvard?” He asked, his voice light.

“12 years,” I replied. “I studied geology for my undergrad and masters. I have worked with the paleontology department since freshman year, though.”

“You’ll be fine,” He reasoned. “I’m sure you have plenty of options.”

I scoffed. He was not wrong, but it was never so black and white. At least, it never felt that way.

“What do you want to do?” I asked, switching subjects. “After graduation?”

If he caught on my deflection, he chose not to comment on it.

“I’d be happy to be a part of the research team here,” He replied. “I’m also a fan of a few museums.”

“But if you had it your way? What then?”

Namjoon chuckled, “Then I’d say a project manager.”

It was comforting to know that I had guessed his answer correctly. He was an adventurous guy who loved to dig. It made sense for him to want to be in charge of one. I was more of a lab rat than anything, but I enjoyed an excavation like anybody else.

“I want to be a museum director,” I admitted.

“Wow,” He said. “Didn’t expect that. Why?”

Settling further into my bed, I closed my eyes.

“My grandfather worked as a researcher at the Field Museum,” I started, a small smile on my face. I could see his face in my mind. “He was a paleoanthropologist, so closer to what you do, but he loved to take me on road trips in the summer to go fossil finding.”

I looked back on those memories fondly. We never really found much of anything except shark teeth out in Florida. I still had a huge collection of them back at my parent’s house. I was surprised they hadn’t thrown them out when I left, my dad always complained about how cluttered it all was, but I guessed they missed me more than they let on. My mom knew how much those teeth meant to me.

During that time I thought I would grow up and be just like him, but once I turned 10 I changed my mind. My mom had been a helicopter parent that limited everything that I saw as a child. I ended up spending a weekend at grandpa’s house and he had taken me to see Ice Age in theaters. I was completely obsessed with Diego, and found myself buying books about the Ice Age. Then about dinosaurs. Our next trip was to Kelley’s Island, Ohio where I found some fossilized coral and a few crystals in the limestone. That was the summer I knew I wanted to be a paleontologist- little did I know I would spend more time looking at rocks than sabertooth tigers and mammoths.

“That sounds nice,” Namjoon replied. “All of my knowledge was from Indiana Jones.”

I laughed.

“Nothing wrong with that.”

I could picture a young Namjoon running around his house wearing a cowboy hat yelling about booby traps. It must have gone against the grain for his family. They were a lot like mine- working class and safe. His father was in business and his mother was a teacher. He and his sister were ambitious, and his rebellion rubbed off on her. Of course, they were proud of him, but it was difficult to convince them that he was making good choices. I frowned. I don’t think my family was all that proud of me outside of getting into Harvard.

“You know I think the world of you, right?” He suddenly asked, serious.

“Huh?”

“I’m just saying you don’t give yourself enough credit,” He clarified. “You really don’t have anything to worry about. Whatever you want you can get, so go for it.”

I bit my lip, “And if it doesn’t work out?”

He snorted, “Doubtful. Still, even if you don’t get something right out of school you’ll be just fine. You’ve made it this far.”

I heard him moving around and I realized that he was in bed. I wondered again if I had actually woken him up. He continued to talk.

“You should come with me this summer.”

Blinking, I didn’t know what he was talking about.

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“I was invited on an excavation to Africa with a group of us and a few professors. I can see if you could come along. They would probably love to have some additional eyes and ears.”

I yawned loudly. I was getting very tired. Namjoon chuckled but did not tease me about it the way he normally would. He was waiting for a response.

“You can ask,” I answered, excited by the prospect. “I’m always happy to go on a dig, and I’ve never been out of the country before.”

He laughed in disbelief.

“I’d grill you about that, but you’re exhausted. Get some sleep, 203.”

I hummed, tucking my blanket under my chin. The cold was still nipping at my body, but I was not as bothered by it as I had been. Talking had been a nice distraction. My eyes closed on their own accord, and I sighed content.

“You, too, 201,” I mumbled. “See you tomorrow?”

“I’ll be back around 6.”

“Day or night?” My voice was very quiet now.

“Night,” I could tell he was smiling. “Can I come over?”

I yawned again, “Sure. I’ll be in class until 8.”

“Night, Y/N.”

I grinned, “Night, Joon.”

I placed my phone beside my pillow and cracked open my eyes. I hung up before rolling over. I was asleep seconds later.

Checking my watch again, I smiled. I only had a few minutes left of lab work before I was free. Glancing over at Morgan, she was hunched over a microscope looking at some plants. I wondered how fun being a Paleobotanist could really be, but coming from studying rocks for eight years I guessed it was more exciting than that.

The lab was practically empty this evening. Not many of us took these night classes, but I loved them. I would just go to work right after I finished up and keep the momentum up for the next day. I was happy the shop was closed for the week due to repairs. It gave me some breathing room to focus on my thesis, and I would be able to go and see Namjoon.

Deciding to start putting my supplies away, put disposables on a metal trey and took out another to begin the process of putting away the fossil I was collecting data on. Tonight, instead of the tusk, I was asked to look at a new trilobite fossil casted in limestone. It was a smooth, easy, and quiet day of writing and sample taking. Bringing the fossil back to the museum’s storage room, I bumped into Dr.Lupon.

“Oh! Y/N,” She exclaimed, a large smile on her face. “I was just about to come looking for you.”

I nodded, “Nice to see you, Dr.Lupon. I was just putting away the trilobite from this morning.”

“Sure, sure,” She nodded, waving toward the room. “Go and do that then meet me back in my office. I have someone who wants to speak with you.”

And then she was whirling away, shouting out to some of the other students to let them know they should start cleaning up. Her long, white peacoat flared out behind her and her heels clicked loudly. I shook my head and went back to work. I could not think of a single person who would want to see me at this hour.

After getting out of my lab gear, I messaged Namjoon to let him know I would be a little late to talk with my professor. Going to find Dr.Lupon proved easier than normal. She really was in her office. Normally, I would have to run all over the museum to find her.

“There she is,” Dr.Lupon smiled, gesturing me in. “Come on in, Y/N.”

Aside from Dr.Lupon sat two older men. One was bald, his skin tan and showing minimal signs of aging. The other had long, wavy, orange hair with thick strands of gray beginning to show. He had a full beard and wore thin, wire glasses. Both of them stood up to greet me. The bald man had a gentle, barely there handshake while the other’s was firm. I gave them both a tight-lipped smile and introduced myself.

“Dr.Christopher Jonas,” The bald man replied, a warm smile on his face.

“Dr.Alistair Moody,” The ginger said after with a thick, English accent. He did not seem as friendly, and reminded me of one of my former biology instructors. That guy was an asshole. “Pleasure to meet you, Dr.Y/L/N.”

I laughed nervously, “I’m not a doctor just yet, Dr.Moody.”

“You will be in a short few months.”

Dr.Jonas gestured to a third seat on their side of the desk. Dr.Lupon was sat comfortably in her seat. Walking over, I sat in the chair. Moody sat beside me and Jonas on the far left. Dr.Lupon gave me a cheeky wink before getting down to business.

“Well, Y/N,” She started. “One of Dr.Moody’s students asked if you would be interested in joining them on an excavation to Sudan and he arranged for a meeting.”

Looking over at Moody, I nodded politely. He was quick, no nonsense, and seemingly hopeful to have me on the team if he went to the trouble of setting up a meeting with Lupon. I knew many faculty members found her hard to work with due to how excentric she could be. I adored the bubbly blonde, and was eternally grateful for all she had done for my career. She believed in me the same way my grandfather had.

“Yes,” I nodded. “I told him that he could see if there was any more room for the trip.”

“We were surprised to hear you were interested at all,” Dr.Jonas spoke up. I guessed he would be another professor organizing everything. “You’re a very difficult woman to convince.”

I laughed. “Have you tried before?”

“Oh, yes,” He laughed, rolling his eyes playfully. “I took my wife’s last name when we got married. You knew me as Christopher Hamal at the time, and I think I emailed you so often you put me in your spam folder.”

Laughing out loud, I clutched my stomach. I remembered Mr.Hamal very well. He was still getting his doctorate and begged me to join his team for a trip to Somalia. Unfortunately, I was far too swamped with work and going through a large argument with my family. I was also not very interested in any archaeological digs since I would be stuck on rock duty. Now, however, rock duty sounded like more fun than nothing at all.

“I’m sorry about that,” I chuckled. “I didn’t mean to be rude. I admire your tenacity, but I was really busy and couldn’t find time to go for a winter trip.”

Jonas laughed, “I should have seen you in person, it might have gone over better. Besides, after reading all of your research papers from the time, I have to say I’m glad you stayed behind. They were fantastic.”

I smiled at the man. It seemed like everyone was trying to be sure I was locked in this time. I thought over the journey to Sudan and hoped he meant caves. There were so many beautiful cave paintings there, and I would love the chance to see them in person. Rock duty, or dig duty, was always fun when you got to see cool shit.

“Anyway,” Moody spared me a small grin. “We just wanted to confirm your interest. We are in desperate need of support staff for the first timers, and I believe you would be a great asset to our team.”

“Before you answer that,” Lupon interrupted me before I could speak. “I’ve volunteered both Morgan Dawson and three of my first year doctoral students to go as well. We will be taking a small tour of Africa, and I would expect for you to be there for both Sudan and the trip after.”

I nodded, “What will I be doing for the rest of the trip?”

Dr.Lupon smugly smiled, “You will be my assistant. Morgan is our data collector for this trip, and I want you to be the one making sure whatever we find is properly protected.”

I smiled brightly, “Ms.Dawson and I work well together.”

The three of them seemed pleased by my comment. Deciding to bring the meeting to a close, I looked at Dr.Moody.

“I’d love to join the team.”

Jonas clapped happily and quickly stood from his seat and leaned over the other man. I took his outstretched hand happily, the smile never leaving my face. He seemed to be more excited about my presence than I did.

“Wonderful news!” He laughed, his good mood infectious.

“Indeed,” Moody chimed in, his reactions more in line with a serious professional. Still, he offered me his hand. “I’ve heard great things about you, Dr.Y/L/N.”

I looked away bashfully. Dr.Lupon was over the moon, her brown eyes sparkling with delight. She and Jonas shared a handshake.

“Y/N’s a treat,” She gushed. Looking over at me, I could see a glint of mischief in her eye. Lupon was prone to meddling and I worried what she might say. “Christopher was the head field paleontologist at Glendive before he came to Harvard.”

Glendive was one of the largest dinosaur museums in America. Based out of Montana, I had gone twice with my grandfather during our summer trips, but it had never caught my eye outside of the fossils. Glendive had far more biblical roots than was normal for a museum, and their philosophy did not really match my own. Still, it was impressive for Jonas to be affiliated with them. It was not an easy task.

“That’s nice,” I smiled politely.

“Where are you headed after graduation?” Dr.Moody asked.

Again, Dr.Lupon responded before I could. She was most definitely meddling, but for once it did not bother me. I was still excited about the good meeting.

“She’s still looking.”

Dr.Moody looked at me confused. No doubt he was expecting something a bit more substantial. I knew Morgan was on her way to Berlin, many of his own students were more than likely already making their own future plans, and I was still stuck. It was strange in our line of work. If you had enough connections- anything could happen, and I had more than enough to get a job somewhere.

“What’s holding you back?” He asked, an eyebrow raised.

I shrugged, “I was hoping the Field Museum would have something, but unfortunately they’re fully staffed.”

Dr.Moody regarded me for a moment. I assumed he was sizing me up. I had a great reputation, my grades were impeccable, and my knowledge was useful. Truly, any museum I went to would be lucky to have me on staff. I was more of an asset than one might think. I was just being stubborn. I had no idea what I wanted.

“Well,” Moody said after a moment. “I doubt Glendive would scratch that itch for you. No offense, Jonas.”

“None taken,” He replied good-naturedly. “I know it’s not the place for everyone.”

“I’m a volunteer at the AMNH,” Moody continued without missing a beat. “They have a few openings for the invertebrate department. Apply.”

Blinking rapidly, I tried to calm my breathing. Field was my dream location, but the American Museum of Natural Science was almost untouchable. Their teams were huge, dedicated, and highly sought after. I hadn’t even gone on their site to see if they were hiring. I would be honored to get the job, but I was worried if my connection would make things unfair.

“Oh, Y/N!” Lupon exclaimed. “You should most definitely apply. You’d be such a great addition to their team. I remember working there back in the early 2000s and I adored it.”

I had completely forgotten about Dr.Lupon’s affiliation. I recall her saying she was in the vertebrae department in her early years. It had been before she went back to school for her doctorate here at Harvard. I smiled at her, hoping it conveyed that I knew exactly what she was doing.

“I’ll look into it,” I finally said to Moody. “I’ve always loved the AMNH.”

He nodded at me, a small smile on his face. I was hopeful by his pleased look. Maybe I could manage to score the job.

“The museum is actually sponsoring the trip,” Jonas said. I had forgotten he was here. “I’m sure they’d be fine with you coming.”

Moody nodded, “The position I’m talking about is in the field. You’d also have to help with the research part of things, but I doubt you’d mind it all that much.”

I shook my head, “Not at all.”

We spoke for a few more minutes about some small details regarding the trip, and Jonas said he’d send me an email with all of the information attached. After giving him all of my contact information, I excused myself.

“I’ll have to thank Namjoon Kim for convincing you,” Jonas sighed.

“He’s never been afraid of putting himself out there,” Moody grinned. He was fond of my neighbor, and it warmed my heart. Namjoon had a way of doing that. “It’s his best quality.”

Dr.Lupon raised an eyebrow at me. The other two men were engrossed in their conversation. I shrugged my shoulders, but allowed a smile. Her eyes lit up in excitement. Dr.Lupon and I had grown rather close over the years, and her old age did not stop her from living like a 21-year-old model. My love life was a topic of conversation when we were alone, and I would have to talk with her about Namjoon at some point. It would not be in front of the two men.

“Well, thank you both again,” I announced. “It is late, however, and I have some plans for the evening. I’ll be taking my leave.”

The three of them bid me goodnight and safe travels. I left before I could get swallowed up in another conversation. Checking my phone, I winced when I looked at the time. I had been here for a lot longer than I realized. Pulling up Namjoon’s phone number, I pressed call.

“Hey,” He answered after a couple rings.

“I’m so sorry,” I rushed, pushing open the doors to get outside. “I got called into a meeting and couldn’t leave.”

He hummed, obviously not upset.

“What was the meeting about?”

I unlocked my bike from the bike rack and placed Namjoon on speakerphone. I secured my helmet in place before responding.

“That Sudan excavation. Dr.Moody and Jonas just wanted to iron out details, and of course, my professor weaseled her way into the project.”

He laughed, “What’s the catch, then?”

I smiled, kicking off. I had put my phone on the holder I installed on my handlebars.

“I’ll only be in Sudan for 4 weeks instead of the three months,” I pouted. “I’ll be in Zambia and Tanzania after. Then, I think we’ll swing by the Karoo Basin. Dr.Lupon hasn’t made that official just yet.”

I cycled quickly, but not enough to hinder my ability to talk. I think he was perfectly fine with my late night, but I still felt guilty about leaving him hanging. I was so excited to see him earlier, but now it felt like I was walking into an argument. My mother hated tardiness. I bit my lip. Namjoon was nothing like her, I reasoned. In fact, my mom would never, ever approve of him if she knew him on a personal level. She’d call him a pig, dim-witted, know-it-all, and rant and rave about his baggy clothes. I relaxed. There was no way he would ever act like her.

“Why would she want to?” He asked.

I turned onto my street.

“The Karoo Basin is one of the best spots for digging. It’s the reason we know as much about the mass extinction as we do. It’s a hard spot to pass up- even if it’s just a quick history lesson and taking pictures.”

I pulled up to the bike rack out front. I parked quickly, locked it up, and threw my helmet into the basket on the front. Taking my phone off the holder, I pressed it to my ear now.

“I just got home,” I heard Namjoon getting out of bed on the other side and his door opening. I smiled. “I’ll see you in a second.”

“I’ll be here.”

Hanging up, I stuffed my phone into my pocket. I only made it a few steps before I heard a familiar voice call my name. Stiffening, I almost made a run for it, but I didn’t know if that would only make things work. I decided to be nice, I was good at that, but firm.

Taehyung jogged up to me, slightly winded. He looked normal, like he never made me uncomfortable, and even placed a hand on my shoulder to steady himself. He braced his knee with the other. I was uncomfortable immediately, but found myself frozen.

“I’ve been trying to run into you,” He finally said, standing up. He did not move his hand.

“Why’d you block me?” He demanded, the friendly tone never leaving his voice.

Still, I was unsettled. Everything about his demeanor said he was far from calm and friendly. His shoulders were tense, his grip on my shoulder ever so slightly tighter than it should be, and the smile on his face almost seemed painted on. It was too wide, too joyful, and showed too many teeth for someone who had been rejected.

I shrugged my shoulders to see what he would do. His grip only got tighter. Laughing awkwardly, I then took a step away from him. His hand loosened but did not move all the way. Growing more uncomfortable, I shuffled.

“I told you,” I started, my voice gentle and unsure. “You were making me uncomfortable. You still are.”

Taehyung sighed, and I swore it sounded frustrated, but the openness in his expression said anything but. In fact, he looked heartbroken. Shifting awkwardly, I tried again to remove his hand. He let me go this time, but took a few steps closer to me. I took one back. He took another.

“I just like you so much,” He said, anguished. “I didn’t mean to come off like that. I swear! I just wanted to see your face.”

I didn’t believe him, but I thought I was being too hard on him. Maybe, if I just acted nicely he would go away and I could see Namjoon. He was probably wondering where I was. I gave Taehyung a weak smile.

“No, I understand, " I said, my voice hollow even to my own ears. “I, uh, I appreciate that.”

Taehyung seemed to pounce now. The sadness in his eyes was gone and instantly replaced with excitement. It was unnerving and I took another step back. He followed me again. I wanted him to go away.

“So, can we still go out?” He asked, the happiness in his voice clearly fake. Or was it? I didn’t know him well enough to say yes or no. I was growing angry with the back and forth my mind kept doing. “We can go right now, if you want. There’s a taco place that’s open a few blocks over.”

I wanted to vomit at the thought of going to Namjoon and I’s spot with anyone else. Especially Taehyung. My skin crawled at the thought of being alone with him. Seeing him tonight put a lot in perspective for me. How much of our friendly relationship had been for show? When he asked me out, did he think I would do whatever he asked without question? Whatever the case was, I felt my own anger bubbling. He was so see through he could have been made of glass.

“Actually-”

“Hey!”

My heart leapt. Frantically, I looked for Namjoon. He was a few feet away, his mouth set into a hard line, and coming closer. Smiling in relief, I quickly backed away from Taehyung and started walking closer to the dark-haired man. He wrapped an arm around my shoulder protectively.

Taehyung’s happy face was gone just as quickly as the happy one. He openly glared at Namjoon, his eyes dark. This only seemed to egg Namjoon on, and he simply pulled me closer to him.

“Didn’t they tell you approaching women at night is a bad idea?” Namjoon asked.

Taehyung's scowl deepend. “I’m her friend, dude. Who the fuck are you?”

I frowned. No, we were not friends. I never considered him one either. He was starting to scare me. Namjoon was unbothered.

“Her boyfriend,” He shot back. “So, I’ll have to say no to those tacos.”

Pulling me away, Namjoon was at ease as we walked away from Taehyung. I had to fight the urge to look back at him. I was worried about who I would see this time.

He waited until we were going upstairs to ask me about the situation. I explained that it had been Taehyung, the guy who I had to block a few weeks ago, and how it had been the first time I’d seen him since.

“He was weird tonight,” I admitted, unlocking my door. “Really weird, actually.”

Namjoon hummed but said nothing more. Wanting to brighten the mood, I immediately took my jacket off once we got inside. Throwing it on my bed, I turned and hugged Namjoon tightly. I could feel the tension leave his shoulders immediately and his arms wrapped around my waist. Placing a gentle kiss to the top of my head, he sighed happily.

“I’m happy to see you,” He said.

And with that, Taehyung was removed from my mind.

Looking over at Namjoon, I found it harder and harder to concentrate. The two of us had been at the library for two hours, and each time I looked over my books, my will to study dwindled.

He looked nice today. Nicer than I was used to seeing him. He had a job interview this morning, something that he would start once we were back from the excavation, and he did not have the time to go home and change afterwards. He said he did not want to be late to our study session. I was doubtful.

I knew he knew how his black slacks hugged his thighs, accentuating the muscles there, and highlighting how long his legs were. It was like they never stopped. Eyeing his belt, the thoughts of him taking it off ruined my concentration again. I heard him chuckle, but I still refused to acknowledge just how worked up I was.

Things were still slowly getting more heated between the two of us since the night I had run into Taehyung. Soft forehead kisses were a commonplace now, and everyone he introduced me to knew me as his girlfriend. We had not, however, gone much further than that.

It was starting to drive me insane. Namjoon had a habit of gently touching me whenever we were alone. Innocent, sweet, and caste touches that left me starved for his attention. I wondered if he thought we needed more time, but I found that hard to believe as well. Something else was going through his head, and I was trying my best to be patient.

Taking another quick look at him, I admired how tightly the deep purple button up strained against his chest. The top three buttons were open, exposing some of his tanned chest and I worked very hard to keep my breathing in check. He was so pretty it hurt.

Namjoon laughed again. I quickly looked back at my book. He found my ogling funny. I swore I saw his chest puff from my seat, and I bit my lip to suppress my growing smile. He was enjoying himself.

“Take a picture,” He said after catching me again. “It’ll last longer.”

Closing my book, I placed it on the table and grinned.

“You look nice.”

Namjoon smiled, his dimples on full display. He enjoyed compliments more than Jimin, something that I never thought I would say. I wanted to introduce them eventually. I knew they would get along, and my friends have been badgering me about meeting my “mystery man.” Wren knew him, but she went along with Kendall’s whining.

“You look better,” He shot back, wiggling his eyebrows.

I scoffed. He always did that. I made a show of looking over my old tracksuit and raised an eyebrow. He chuckled, keeping his voice down.

“Oh, yeah, definitely better.”

I rolled my eyes.

“You’re impossible.”

I started putting my books away, Namjoon joining without asking. He always followed my lead. Startled, I realized that we were stuck because of me. Without saying a word, he had put every ball in my court to see where I would throw it. It was not until after my late night texts that he knew he could do the same to me. Hugs had also been initiated by me. Even our first conversation, even if they were through notes, had been all me. The only time he had pushed was after he thought long and hard about it. Only when I failed to push further did he see how far he could go. Looking at him now, I knew that he would do whatever I wanted.

What did I want?

“Where are we going, 201?” He asked, his eyes bright.

A wave of calm washed over me as I regarded him. He truly was the kindest man I had ever met. The echo of a woman screaming for him only made me smile harder. He was as kind as he was mean, and I was growing curious about the other side of him. Very, very curious.

“How do you feel about meeting some friends of mine?” I asked.

He nodded, “Sounds like fun. You said I already know one of them, yeah?”

We started walking downstairs. We had set up at the top floor of the library in a far off corner. I placed my finger over my mouth as we walked. There were a lot of students here studying and I did not want to get on the librarian’s bad side. He was known for kicking people out over the pettiest things. I responded once we were outside.

“Wren Wu,” I replied.

“Oh!” He exclaimed, excited. “She’s the French-Chinese girl, right?”

Laughing, I nodded.

“That’s the one.”

Wren was a minority in her field. Mostly surrounded by white men it did not surprise me that Namjoon would remember her Ethnicity more than anything else. It was rare to see a woman of color at all, but a Chinese woman who could speak Cantonese and French was even rarer.

Wren had told me the two of them tended to stick together on their excavations. There was an Egyptian man and a woman from Nigeria that she was also close with. Apparently, they felt far more comfortable with one another than anyone else. I knew Wren was chased a lot by the men she worked with and took great pleasure in saying she was married.

“She’s always fun,” Namjoon laughed, remembering something. “I’d love to meet her outside of work.”

“You’ll also meet her husband,” I said, looking for Namjoon’s car. “You’ll like him a lot. He was a Classics major, and got his Ph.D. two years ago. He’s teaching at an all boy’s school now.”

Finding the silver Volvo was easy enough, and I pointed in its direction. Namjoon clicked his lock just to be sure. The headlights flashed.

“Sounds stuffy,” He admitted.

I laughed, “Jimin’s the furthest thing from stuffy. He’s more reserved now, but back in the day he was an absolute terror.”

I slid into the passenger seat with ease. Namjoon quickly started the car and turned the heating on. It had started snowing a few days ago and the wind was horrible. I placed my hands in front of the vent to warm up. He shot me a glare as he pulled out. He had been upset that I forgot to wear gloves. I smiled sheepishly back.

“Who else will be there?” He asked, his interest growing.

“Kendall and Jungkook,” I said, not realizing that I made them sound like a couple before it was out of my mouth. I ignored it and kept going. “Maybe Hoseok if he’s not working. Jimin’s cousin, Yoongi, always shows up to our get-togethers.”

“Who are they?”

Namjoon hated driving in silence, and hated putting on music to fill it up even more. He always thought there was something to talk about- even if there wasn’t. I relaxed into my seat and began talking.

“Kendall’s a paramedic. I met her through Wren. Jungkook has been my best friend since freshman year and is in law school. Hoseok is a physician at Children’s Hospital, and Yoongi is a real estate agent. They were roommates for years, and always threw Christmas parties. We met after Wren invited me to one when she and Jimin started dating.”

That had been a rough year. I had been seeing this guy for a few months, and Jenna ended up getting in his head. He broke up with me over text and promptly blocked me soon after. Wren refused to let me sulk, and my dad was giving me the silent treatment so I did not go home. After dragging me out, I was surprised at how much fun I had. Hoseok and I even kissed under the mistletoe, but I chose not to tell Namjoon about that. We were tipsy off the eggnog and never spoke about it again.

“When are you supposed to see them?” He asked, turning into our apartment parking lot.

I shrugged, “I’ll call Wren once I get inside to see.”

He pulled up to the stairs. He had class in a few minutes, but insisted on dropping me off. After Taehyung he was more cautious about leaving me alone. I appreciated it but I did not think it was really necessary.

“I’ll see you in a bit,” He looked over at me and smiled.

As much as I did not want to leave the car, I knew I had to. With a wave and a kiss on his cheek, I got out and made my way upstairs. The cold nipped at my skin and I rushed to get to my door. I saw a small Amazon box sitting out front with my mother’s name on it and sighed. She had been very disappointed when I told her I would be staying on campus for Christman break. Again. I didn’t have the heart to tell her that dad was the only reason I did not want to go back.

I made the trip for Thanksgiving, but it was not long after I got there that my dad picked a fight with me. My mom and I had come to an understanding years ago already, and I could tell that she was making an effort to respect my decisions. Unfortunately, the same could not be said for my dad. When I told him that I would only move back to Chicago if I got a job at Field, he was livid and demanded to know why I treated them so badly. I ended up staying at my uncle’s house for the rest of my trip, and only called my mom to tell her “Happy Thanksgiving.” I did not want to deal with it for Christmas either.

Slipping inside, I was happy that the heating was fixed. It was still weak and practically room temperature, but it was much better than cold air blasting. I turned on my space heater and got a pair of scissors from the kitchen.

Opening the box, I smiled sadly. Inside was a small set of chisels and a brand new hammer. A pair of gloves as well as a small journal were underneath them. She never really knew what to buy me, not sure how I would react to things, but always tried. This was the first time she ever bought me excavation gear.

Putting the box away under my bed, I knew I should call her first and then get in touch with Wren. I would need them to pick me up. Preparing myself, I pressed the call button and waited. No amount of breathing or calming exercises helped. She picked up on the third ring and I nearly cried. I loved her but it was hard to be in her life. I heard a man’s voice in the background, and nearly hung up. Why did he have to be home?

“Hello?”

I took a deep breath and forced a smile to my face. That helped. Pretending helped.

“Hey mom,” I said, proud of how strong it sounded.

“Oh!” I could hear her joy and it nearly brought me to my knees. I heard my dad ask who it was and she said my name. He was very quiet and I think I heard something slam. I closed my eyes and hung my head. “It’s so nice to hear your voice. Did you change your mind about Christmas?”

Sniffling, I wiped the tears from my cheeks. With great effort, I brought the smile back. I doubt she would ever be able to tell when something was wrong with me. She had never been the most aware mother despite her best efforts.

“No,” I replied. “I actually got something in the mail from you.”

“From me?” She was confused. I was confused. “I didn’t send you anything.”

Dragging the box back out, I reread the name on the package and confirmed that it was for sure her. She was very adamant that she had never sent me anything, but maybe it was her sister. They both used the same Amazon account. I agreed with her but did not believe it for a second. Aunt Halle would have given me romance books and expensive chocolates. There was only one other person who would send me something like this, and I knew I would have to talk to him.

“Hey mom?” I interrupted her story about her Bingo night.

“Yes?” She asked, oblivious to the way my voice wobbled.

“Can you put dad on the phone?”

She went very quiet. She hated out fights more than anybody, and I always felt awful for her. Forever stuck in the middle without any guidance on who to choose. I knew she agreed with me, I knew that she just wanted me to be happy, and I knew that she knew he always started the fights. But I also knew that she hated me being so far away, she hated how different we were, and she hated that I had made everything so difficult. If I had just did what they wanted me to do then we would still be a family, but I couldn’t leave things alone. I was too much like my grandfather.

“I’ll go get him,” She finally replied, voice soft as a feather.

It took a few minutes, and I heard their hushed anger through the other side. He did not want to talk to me. I looked at the box and steadied myself. No, he obviously did want to talk to me, but he was a prideful man. He was not used to me being disagreeable, and had a hard time looking at me like a grown woman. I repeated the mantra in my head until he came to the phone.

“Y/N,” He greeted me, apprehensive and hesitant. “What do you need to talk with me about?”

I knew he loved me, I knew he adored me, and I knew he truly thought he was doing the right thing. That did not make the hurt go away. A fresh set of tears ran down my cheeks at the sound of his voice. He had been talking to me like that since I turned 16.

“I got the package,” I replied, just as closed off and cold.

We went around and around each time.

He cleared his throat. “Good.”

“Yeah.”

I took a breath and tried once again to calm myself. This should not be this hard, but it was. I wiped my face and focused on the heavy breathing on the other side of the phone. He was just as bad as I was. We were both stubborn. It almost made me laugh.

“Come home for Christmas,” He all but begged, his voice much softer now. “Your mother misses you.”

I shook my head in defeat, “I know she does.”

We both knew what I wanted him to say.

“Think about it,” He urged, not giving in.

I always had a hard time accepting this side of my dad. When I was a girl, he was loving. He would always humor me, and he always took the time out of his day to answer whatever stupid questions I asked him. For every “why” I asked my dad would always find an answer. Even if it was “I don’t know” he would give me that. Things changed as I did, and I never really knew why. Kendall said it was normal for parents to have a difficult time with their children growing up, but she had a completely different family from mine. She was raised by a single mother who only learned to love her more with each passing year. My parents mourned the child they always wanted that I could never give them.

“Dad,” I sighed. “Why did you send me something?”

He sighed, defeated. I hoped we could get somewhere now. Heavy sighs usually meant he was tired of licking his wounds and wanted me to lick them for him.

“I miss you,” He finally admitted. “I wanted you to know that I was sorry, and I want you to visit more. I’m sorry about Thanksgiving, Y/N.”

And I cried.

“I’m sorry, too,” I sobbed. “I shouldn’t have run out like that.”

I heard quiet cries from him now, and I huffed. My dad was such a sensitive person. He was one of those people who cried during movies and donated to animal shelters. The only time his horns showed was for me, and I always made sure ours locked. Now, though, neither one of us wanted to fight.

I sniffled, “I’ll come home, dad. Okay?”

He cried harder, “Please. I already have a ticket and everything. Just please come home.”

“I’ll be there.”

We spoke for a few minutes, mostly making sure that I was actually going to go home and me reassuring him that I would. He told me he had to get back to work and hung up. It was Saturday, and even if he had paperwork to do, my father never did anything outside of work hours. He just needed to calm himself down.

I wasted no time calling Wren. I had sucked up my mood enough to make it through the brief phone call. She was excited, more so than usual, and immediately agreed to having dinner at her house. After interrogating me about things that Namjoon would want, and me reassuring her that he would eat anything she made him, we hung up.

Me: Wren invited us to dinner at her house

Me: What time will you be finished today?

I had to wait a few minutes for a response, but it helped me catch my breath. I was upset at myself for caving so easily, but I really wanted to make up with him. I wanted things to work the best they could. Thinking about my dad now, I hoped I would get the chance to tell him about Namjoon when I got home. That would help the both of them feel better about me being far away, and my mother would be excited to tell her friends at Bingo. It was something she knew about, and other people would be able to talk with her about. I smiled at the mental image.

Joon: I’ll be finished up at 5 today. We can leave at 6 so I can shower and change

I frowned, thinking about the nice outfit from today. Why would he need to change? He looked yummy.

Me: But you look nice already

Joon: Not too dressed up?

I pursed my lips. Quickly texting Wren, I asked her what the dress code was. I was already underdressed for these things, but the thought of Namjoon in anything but that purple shirt was painful. He just looked too damn fine.

Wren: It’s always been dressy casual. You’re the only person who shows up in sweats. Why?

I laughed.

Me: Joon wanted to know

Wren: I like him more and more

Texting Namjoon back, he said he still wanted to shower and change, but he would keep that in mind. Pouting, I decided to kill time by taking a shower myself. I could figure out clothes once I was out. Putting the space heater on a higher heat, I hoped the room would be warm enough to keep my teeth from chattering when I got out.

I put on my shower speaker and started getting the water hot. I had been going through a nostalgia run recently, and had made an R&B playlist. My mom always listened to it when she cleaned the house. Keisha Cole started singing and I sang along as I got undressed. I lost track of time as I danced and sang happily, swaying my hips with my eyes closed.

“I might as well have cheated on you,” I sang loudly, finally turning the water off. “As much as you accused me of cheating.”

Taking the speaker with me, I wrapped my towel around my body and went into the main room. I went to my dresser and began digging through it to find something to wear. Knowing Namjoon would be there I wanted to put in more effort than normal. I refused to be that person in the relationship, especially if he was going to put in effort as well.

“I’m not scared of the lions, and tiger, and bears,” I sang along with Jazmine Sullivan. Fearless was my favorite album when I was in middle school. I scoffed at how naive I had been then. “I’m not scared to perform at a sold out affair, but I’m scared of loving you.”

My phone chimed.

Wren: Does he like seafood?

Me: That’s the only thing that’s iffy

Wren: Will it offend him?

I huffed.

Me: No

Me: He just won’t eat it but everyone else will

Wren: KK

She was stressed about this way too much. I put my phone on its charger and went back to looking for something to wear. I did not own too many dressy things. I wore business casual when I was teaching, and I owned plenty of boring lecture outfits, but I knew it was not what Wren had in mind. Going to the bottom drawer, I found a pair of loose, beige, linen pants. Trying them on, I was happy with how comfortable they were. Quickly matching it with a black turtleneck, I tucked the shirt in and adjusted it so it looked more cohesive. It was too icy outside for heels, so Wren would just have to be happy with my snow boots. We would not be wearing them inside anyway. With my outfit ready, I began doing my makeup and hair.

I was ready at 5:30, music still blasting while I took my time deciding on accessories. I was not going to wear them, but since I had time I thought a pair of earrings would be nice. I sang along to Destiny’s Child and danced around while I waited. I knew Namjoon would be able to hear me, but it only seemed to spur me. I wanted him to hear me. In fact, I wanted him to come over here and shut me up himself.

Surprised by my thoughts, I giggled nervously and dived on my bed to call Kendall. The sexual tension was really starting to make me lose my mind, and I knew she would be helpful. Wren would be too busy squealing and would have made the entire night about getting me laid. She was never the subtle type, either.

“Yo,” She answered, her voice echoing.

I was on speaker. Great.

“You alone?” I asked, listening for Namjoon.

His shower was still running.

“Yeah, what’s up?”

Sighing, I almost lost my nerve. Things were going slow, insanely slow actually, but there was nothing wrong with it. Namjoon seemed happy and content, but I knew I wasn’t. I was hoping to move things along a bit more.

“How does one seduce their neighbor?” I asked, keeping my tone lighthearted.

Kendall laughed loudly and I giggled with her. This was something she expected from me by now. We always talked sex and romance with one another. Kendall was happy that I gave good advice about matters of the heart, and I was never disappointed with her sex tips.

“Well, yours is a freak,” She joked, “So, I think you have a bit of an advantage.”

“He’s barely touched me,” I admitted, biting my lip.

The water was still running.

“Really?” Kendall seemed surprised. “Does he think you’re a virgin?”

I choked on my own spit. I had never even considered that. Could he think that? Even if he didn’t think I was a virgin, he could think I was very inexperienced. He would not be completely wrong, I hated to admit, but it still felt embarrassing to think about. Trying not to rush to conclusions, I told Kendall we had never talked about that but I doubted he thought that.

“Does he know you want to have sex?” She asked this time.

“I don’t know,” I shrugged. “I haven’t said yes or no. We’ve never even gotten in a position for that to come up.”

Kendall huffed and I knew she was rolling her eyes at me. She always looked at me like I was an idiot when we talked about this stuff. According to her, I was too timid and uncomfortable to get what I wanted. I needed to work on that. I just had no idea where to begin.

“The guy sounds like he operates like me,” She had a hard time not coming off as a bitch, but I knew it was just the tone of her voice more than anything. She was very blunt and to the point, which could be off putting, but I appreciated it. “He’s probably just waiting for you to figure out what you want before he jumps on you. Probably doesn’t want to scare you away.”

I sighed, “He’s always waiting for me to make moves. I just don’t know how to initiate some of this shit.”

“Then tell him that.”

The water was turned off.

“I have to go,” I said, keeping my voice down. “He’s out the shower and he’ll be able to hear me through the walls.”

Kendall chuckled, her voice much closer to the speaker now.

“See you later.”

Hanging up, I went back to the bathroom and began touching things up to kill time. The music still played but I was distracted. At 6 I turned everything off and slipped into my boots. I chose my black coat to wear for the ride over and went outside. Locking up, I leaned against the railings while I waited for Namjoon to come outside.

The snow had stopped falling, but I could make out patches of ice on the ground. I was glad I picked the practical shoes. I thought about Namjoon seeing me in heels and my stomach got warm. He seemed like the type who liked to keep them on. I shook my head and sighed. I needed to get a grip.

I thought again about what I might want tonight. We hadn’t even kissed yet, something that bothered me, and I knew Kendall’s words held some truth. I was the one holding everything back. I remembered how often Namjoon had sex before and frowned. He was insatiable. Was he just not that interested in me? Had he been more attracted to those women? Was he afraid of us getting too close? Maybe he thought I would be uncomfortable with his desires. Whatever the case, it was really starting to eat away at me.

“Have you been out here long?”

I jumped, quickly turning around. Eyes widening, I drank in Namjoon’s appearance with hungry eyes. He wore a similar pair of black trousers from earlier, but this time he was wearing a black shirt. I admired the heavy, brown plaid overcoat he wore and wondered if it was as warm as it looked. A pair of black leather gloves hugged his large hands tightly and I knew they were too tight. His eyes trained on my hands and a scowl was on his face. I had forgotten my gloves again.

“No,” I winced at how airy my voice was. “Just a couple minutes.”

Namjoon shook his head at me fondly, his hair slicked back and perfectly laid. It was new and I loved it. I could not tell if he was happy with how I looked, but I saw his eyes appraising me with fondness. Reaching into one of the pockets on his coat he handed me a black ball. I snorted.

“You got me gloves?” I playfully mocked, slipping them on.

He smiled, “My mom would be disappointed in me if you were cold.”

We started walking together, our bodies close enough to touch, and I revealed the warmth that radiated from his body. Namjoon reached for my hand. I leaned closer to him and cursed having to let him go. The stairs were too narrow for us to stay like this.

“Your mom sounds a lot like Jimin,” I commented as we descended.

Namjoon laughed.

“He’s a stickler about the cold, too?”

I nodded, “Worse. Wren can’t leave the house without at least 6 layers at this time of the year.”

The drive was pleasant. Namjoon talked about his classes and the new job he was hoping to get. It would be a Field Director position at a company here in Boston. I had high hopes even if he was nervous. He was worried about more experienced people applying, but I tried to reassure him that a Ph.D did not replace field experience- something that he had plenty of. He was not sold, but I had a feeling he would get to the second round of interviews.

“Where do I turn?” He asked.

I pointed left, making sure to point out the dark side street their house was on. You would miss it if you did not know it was there. Wren loved their hidden away cul-de-sac, and I knew Jimin was proud of their home. He had grown up in a rough part of town in a small, one-story house that was falling apart when they bought it. Now he lived in one of the nicest homes in their neighborhood. He was even able to pay for his parent’s home to be renovated.

“It’s the big brick house at the end of the street,” I mumbled.

Namjoon whistled, “Nice place.”

I nodded, “They worked hard for this house. Wren worked two jobs and Jimin’s book about myths was flying off the shelves around the time it was on the market. It wasn’t always this nice, but the private school pays him extremely well so they’ve been fixing it up for the last three years.”

“Damn,” He whispered. “They did a really nice job.”

I giggled, “Yoongi’s got all the connections.”

Kendall and Yoongi were already here, their cars parked out front on the curb. Hoseok’s Pris was in the driveway, and I pointed it out to Namjoon. I was hopeful about the night. I knew he would get along with everyone, but I had a sneaking suspicion that Hoseok would be the highlight. Jimin could wax poetry, and Yoongi would drink him under the table, but Hoseok was personable and funny. They reminded me of one another in a way.

Namjoon kept looking around, his eyes wide as he took in the nice houses around us. I smiled at him. He was very sweet.

“Wren’s family was a big help,” I conceded. “They’re very well off and gave them a good bit of the money for the down payment.”

This seemed to ease him. His family had a difficult time when they first moved to America, and his father had to go back to school even though he had been an engineer for ten years in Korea. Something like this would have been far too much for his little family, and I had to agree with them. I was happy for my friends, but I was still uncomfortable when I saw it for the first time. I had even likened it to a mansion.

“Y/N!” Wren called out from the front door.

She must have been looking out of the window for us. I smiled at her and waved. Taking Namjoon’s hand, I jogged to the front door. Wren pulled me into a tight hug and I chuckled at her excitement. She was practically bouncing. It was rare for me to bring a guy home.

“You look so cute,” She gushed, happy with my outfit.

She was on Namjoon quickly after.

“Hey Kim,” Her smile was splitting her face in half now, and I wondered if her cheeks hurt. “I’m so happy you came.”

Namjoon returned her hug. With a polite smile and reserved squeeze of her shoulder, he was trying to hide his uncomfortable shifting. He did not like being grabbed without permission- it was something we had spoken about during one of our first dates. He exhaled in relief once she walked away from him and back into the house. She had not stopped talking since she came outside.

Taking our shoes off, I brought Namjoon over to the spare slipper rack in the small entryway. He looked for ones that were close to his size, but I could not tell if he was having any luck. Jimin had small feet, but maybe one of the others had big enough feet to make up for it. Wren had bought Kendall and I our own pairs for the housewarming party so I had no trouble finding them. Namjoon seemed to find ones that would work and put them on.

“Jimin’s excited about having you over,” Wren was standing a few feet away still rambling. “He’s not able to talk with the other guys about his interests. You’re Heaven sent.”

I gave my friend a pointed look. She completely ignored me, flipping her ponytail in indignation, and continued to talk about how happy everyone was to see my date. Glancing at Namjoon I was happy to see he was relaxing a bit more. He was still tense, probably from the hug, and I wished to reach out to him. I was worried Wren would physically combust if I had.

“Come on,” She gestured overdramatically, already walking away. “Everyone’s in the kitchen.”

Namjoon stuck close to my side, his nervousness apparent to me. I doubted anyone else would be able to pick up on his too straight posture. Reaching out, I gently squeezed his arm and tried to reassure him with a smile. He grinned back at me, placing his hand over mine. Walking into the kitchen, I put a bit of distance between us to avoid Kendall and her side comments. Especially after the phone call from earlier.

The kitchen was loud and in full-swing. The entire room smelled incredible and I was excited for dinner later. Sniffing, I could pick out the distinct smell of roasting meat and licked my lips. Knowing Wren, it was probably a duck.

“Hey guys!” Jimin called out, eager. He was in an abnormally great mood this evening and quickly scooped me into a warm embrace. I hugged him back just as fiercely. Jimin was one of my good friends and I was hopeful he would get along with Namjoon. “It’s so good to see you.”

Stepping away from him, I took Namjoon’s hand in mine and pulled him closer. The two of them introduced themselves and shared a handshake. Namjoon did not pull his hand away from mine. Looking around, I waved to everyone else. They were all surrounding the large island in the middle of the room, large glasses of wine in their hands. Each of them were looking at Namjoon with intense interest and I shot them a glare.

“Come,” Jimin urged, “Make yourself comfortable. Wine?”

“That would be nice. Thank you,” Namjoon seemed to relax a bit at the warm welcome.

Kendall called me over, her patience ran out, and I looked back at Namjoon. He waved me off letting go of my hand. I nodded, completely unconvinced, and he smiled at me. As if to prove a point, he walked away from me first.

“What are we having?” He asked Jimin.

“Wren made duck with a few side dishes,” The teacher replied easily, already starting to introduce him to Yoongi and Hoseok.

I found my place with the girls and got caught up with their conversation. As always, I was subject to their gossiping, but I couldn’t help my giggles. Kendall leaned into me, her laughter joining my own. I had always heard the strangest stories from the two of them. My favorites were Kendall’s ER tales. My favorite was the time she had to escort a man from one hospital to another due to his medical condition. When she got there he was in the ceiling and she had to help the nurses get him down. I laughed harder thinking about it.

I felt the tension I had no idea I was carrying melt. Tonight was going to be fun. Looking over my shoulder, I found Namjoon already looking at me. He looked so soft in the warm lights, and I had the urge to go to him. I stopped myself when Jimin got his attention once more. They were talking about Percy Jackson, which brought a smile to my face. Yes, tonight would be just fine.

“Thanks for inviting me,” Namjoon shook Jimin’s hand. He was at ease now, not a single bit of tension in him at all. I could smell the wine Kendall had spilled hanging in the air. It had gotten in his lap, but he seemed unbothered. “I had a wonderful time and dinner was delicious.”

Wren was flushed from the alcohol, and her eyes shined with pleasure from the compliment. She was used to our praises but after stressing all day she was glad things worked out. She was practically bouncing when Namjoon asked for her bitter melon recipe. I gave both of them hugs. Words didn’t need to be said- they knew how I felt.

“You’re welcome anytime,” Wren replied.

“Think about tennis, okay?” Jimin reminded him, shaking his hand again.

Hoseok and Jimin went to tennis once a week, but the doctor was busier than normal nowadays since the other urologist on staff retired. With the influx of new patients he had little free-time. Namjoon seemed interested in joining the pair, and Jimin jumped at the opportunity to spend more time with my boyfriend. They hit it off more than I thought they would and even exchanged numbers.

“I’ll let you know when I’m free,” He assured Jimin.

After talking for a few minutes, we finally walked back to the car. Things had gone very well tonight. After the nervous introductions, Namjoon settled into the group easily. He and Jimin talked about mythology and ancient Greece, Hoseok was happy to have a fellow baseball fan around, and Yoongi was just glad he did not have to deal with Jimin’s “nerding” alone. After the strange story about the West Virginian woman, the girls and I stuck to more mundane topics. Jungkook was busy tonight and could not make it, so I got an earful about how disappointed Kendall was.

Blasting the heater, I could tell Namjoon was in a good mood. I was happy he had a nice time tonight. It was surprising how little I thought of him being there. Any other time I had brought a guy around I walked on pins and needles the entire night trying to hide as much of myself as possible. Smiling to myself, I let the feeling of rightness wash over me. I had finally found someone who liked me even with all of my niche interests. He actively indulged me as well, something completely foreign, and wanted to get to know the people I loved.

Glancing at him, I was blown away by how handsome he looked. Keeping my hands to myself had been the hardest part of the evening. Everytime I caught sight of him I wanted to run my fingers through his hair. Whenever we locked eyes I imagined myself pulling him somewhere quiet and taking what I wanted. Right now, I stared at his lips and wondered how they would feel.

“You looked beautiful tonight,” Namjoon suddenly said, eyes locked on the road. “I don’t remember if I told you that already.”

My smile widened, “Thank you regardless.”

He stole a look at me and grinned back. I shifted my body towards him and watched him openly now. I was going to kiss him tonight, I decided. If I was going to push my luck, I would be in his bed. The thought made me more anxious than I thought it would. Was I ready to have sex with him? Placing a large hand on my thigh, Namjoon stole another look at me and winked.

I would end up in his bed if it was the last thing I do.

The drive was quiet. My eyes were on him and his were on the road. The wine was catching up to me on the way out, but the cold air was sobering me up. Namjoon smelled of alcohol and cinnamon that made me dizzy.

The closer we got to the complex the more resolved I became. I wanted him so badly. Kendall had said he might be waiting for me, and knowing everything about him I was sure he was. He only gently guided me in the direction he wanted me to go, but never had he pushed through the invisible wall I had made. A wall I never really noticed.

Suddenly, I was upset about my choice of underwear. It was simple, white, and nothing to be excited about. I hoped he would be fine with that. I was not sure about the mystery women who stayed the night, but I could imagine they would go all out for the handsome man beside me. I on the other hand completely neglected to consider the possibilities. Filled with a sudden splash of doubt, I looked away from Namjoon.

“What’s the matter?” He asked gently.

I shook my head, “It’s dumb.”

“Nothing you ever say is dumb,” He argued, amused.

Should I talk to him about my fears? It was a hard conversation to have, but I was sure my nerves would make me back out of my plans. I wanted to have sex with him, at the very least a kiss, but I never thought about being insufficient. Would he like me? Would he still think I looked beautiful laid out on his bed with a pair of granny-panties on? Sighing in frustration, I decided to speak my mind. If Kendall was right about him waiting for me then maybe I should just tell him what I want.

“Why haven’t we moved forward with our relationship?” I asked.

Getting a gauge on his feelings might help me maneuver my own.

“I wasn’t sure how you felt,” He replied, voice even. In fact, he was talking like it was the easiest thing in the world. “I can be overwhelming and I wasn’t sure how to go about it with you. You’re very different from the women I usually meet.”

I nodded, “You were afraid of scaring me off?”

He chuckled. “You could say that. I mean, you know about that side of me more than I would like for you to.”

Face heating, I laughed in disbelief. He was so open about his feelings. It was strange to be with a man who treated me with enough respect to be honest. Namjoon and my father were polar opposites and it only made me happier. There was nothing to be ashamed about.

“And you think I don’t like that?”

Stealing a look at me, Namjoon nodded.

“I didn’t want to assume anything, but it’s hard to think about you in that setting.”

I laughed, “So sex with me is hard to think about?”

He grinned, his eyes twinkling with mischief. I smiled. I loved a playful Namjoon.

“Oh, no. That’s very, very easy.”

I hummed, “So, it’s the whips and chains then?”

“I think about it,” He said easily, turning down our street. “But I’m only into what you’re into.”

I laughed again. What were we talking about? We were almost to the parking lot now and I knew I would have to be very clear with him. He could think I’m joking, or maybe take this as a sign that we could do more but not tonight. No, I needed it tonight. I craved it. Thinking about him hovering over me and covering my body with his was mouth-watering.

“Well, I’m here,” I finally said, voice smaller than I would like. “If I didn’t like what you liked then I wouldn’t entertain this.”

Namjoon was quiet. Contemplative. I could tell by the quirk of his eyebrow that he was thinking of his next words carefully. I was done with the kid gloves. I wanted the cold, calculating predator from next door to make an appearance. As we parked, I changed my mind. We did not trust one another enough for that big of a leap. Maybe I could pay around with the nickname a bit? It seemed to rile him up.

“What are you asking me?” He asked, looking into my eyes.

I took a deep breath.

“I’m hungry,” I blurted out. I almost winced at how idiotic I sounded. Namjoon also seemed confused with my outburst, and I tried to fix it the best I could. “You have ramen at your place, right?”

From bewilderment to awe, it felt like a thousand different emotions crossed Namjoon’s face until it finally settled on amused. His eyes danced with laughter and I knew I had thrown him for a loop. I had never been bold like this but I wanted that to change. If he was waiting around for me then I would deliver.

“How far do you want to go?” He asked, his breathing picking up. “I need to keep myself in check.”

I giggled, opening my door.

“Let’s figure that out together.”

With a smirk, Namjoon opened his own door. I was giddy with excitement. It felt like prom night all over again, only this time instead of the Girl’s Bathroom I’d be in a man’s apartment. Rounding the car, I met Namjoon on his side and took his hand. The two of us were laughing and sneaking looks at each other as we walked through the parking lot.

“What kind of ramen do you like?” Namjoon asked, unable to keep the smile off his face.

I pretended to think, the stupid grin on my face making my cheeks hurt.

“What would you recommend?”

I could tell he was enjoying the little game we were playing. He had yet to touch anything but my hand, but I could tell he was excited. His fingers trembled slightly and he walked much faster than normal. Trying to keep up, I nearly slipped. Namjoon quickly reached out to steady me.

Arm around my waist, he paused. The smile never left his face and we both laughed at the clumsy fall. Apologizing for his eagerness, Namjoon slowly helped me back on my feet. Of course, we were on a slick piece of ice and had to carefully walk along it to avoid any further falls. Keeping me close, Namjoon and I awkwardly shuffled across the ice.

“You okay?” He asked.

“Yeah,” I breathed, planting my feet on the concrete again. “You would think I’d be used to the snow by now.”

He chuckled, not letting me go. “Chicago or New York, the snow is still shitty.”

I just looked at him. He was so beautiful in the moonlight. His hair pushed back and gelled into place, the subtle way his eyes squinted to see me better in the shadows, and how cold his fingers felt through my clothes. All of it made me want to fall to my knees at his feet. Namjoon was so perfect and I realized that I was falling in love with him.

It only took him two months to force his way into my heart, and I no longer felt the need to stop him. Whatever insecurities or self consciousness that had unknowingly held me back felt unimportant now as I stood in his arms. Even if he ran away screaming one day, or somehow found me to be the most unattractive woman on the planet after tonight, I would not change it for a second. Because right now he looked at me like nothing was more precious to him.

He was looking at me like I was the most beautiful woman he had ever met.

Without thinking, I cupped his face and brought it down to meet my own. Our lips met in a second motion, his arms wrapping around my waist and cocooning me into his chest while mine held his cheeks like glass. His nose brushed against my cheek, cold and soft, while his chapped lips molded roughly against my own. He tasted like wine and garlic, but I had never had anything better.

It was gentle, sweet, and hardly there, but I felt the kiss all the way down to my toes. Moving my hands, I wrapped them around his neck and he hissed. Drawing back from me, Namjoon gave me a knowing look. I realized then that I had forgotten to put on my gloves. I chuckled and looked down at the concrete. My head was still floating.

My lips tingle where he had been.

Taking my hands from his neck, Namjoon took them into his large hands and rubbed on the exposed skin. I relished in the warmth. I really needed to get better at taking care of myself. Placing two soft kisses on each of them, Namjoon let them go.

“Let’s get inside,” His voice was softer, more gentle than it had been before. His eyes no longer held the same fire and his hands did not tremble. I was worried he had seen something in me that I had not. Had he not felt the same things I had? “You need to warm up.”

We walked upstairs in companionable silence. I was worrying over the kiss now. It was so nice. I loved how small I felt with him wrapped around me, the way his body enveloped mine, and how gently he touched me. He had felt so safe and warm I never wanted it to end. The way he looked at me…

There was nothing to worry about, I reminded myself. This was Namjoon. He enjoyed my company and listened when I talked. He built miniatures in my apartment and paid for my shitty street tacos. He had not brought anybody around since he made his promise. That had to count for something.

I would not let my insecurities ruin this for me.

Reaching our floor, he took my hand once again and walked us to his apartment. I did not even look at my door when we passed it. I would pretend it never existed for tonight. Hopefully, if all went well, I could come back here more often.

Namjoon’s apartment was a mirror opposite of my own apartment. His bed was tucked into the same corner as mine, but instead of a small end table, there was a bookshelf beside his. A futon was near the front door with a few plants to decorate the living area. I admired the flatscreen on the wall and was pleased to find framed photos on either side. I would try to take a look at those another time.

The kitchen was just as boring as mine with the only exception being a toaster and a coffee pot on top of a small buffet table. I could smell a hint of the grinds in the room but other than that it was mostly art on the walls and shelves with some collectables above the futon. It looked far more lived-in than my place did. I refused to personalize anything until I bought my own house.

“I like it,” I said, taking my coat off and throwing it on the futon beside Namjoon’s. “Especially those Sailor Moon figurines.”

He laughed, “It was my sister’s favorite and I started watching it with her.”

“Are you a Sailor Jupiter or Sailor Venus, guy?” I joked.

Namjoon began taking off his watch. I admired how wide his shoulders were in his button-down. His legs looked so nice in those jeans that I found it difficult to keep my hands to myself. I was going to give him a moment to himself before completely throwing dignity out of the window. He was getting comfortable. I joined him and removed my shoes. I hadn’t gone further than the door.

“Neither,” He shrugged, throwing me a glance over his shoulder. “I’ve always had a thing for Pluto.”

Eyeing the figures, I saw Sailor Pluto, Mars, and, to my surprise, Chibi Moon also there. Her bubble gum pink hair stands out like a sore thumb in the otherwise neutrally colored house. I had never pegged him for an anime guy, let alone Sailor Moon, but I liked it. He felt comfortable enough with me to talk about it. I doubted any of the others took any notice of the small figures on the walls. I doubted he would have told them the backstory.

“You look nervous.”

Turning toward his voice, I shook my head at Namjoon’s words. He seemed completely unconvinced, but made no other comment. His eyes watched my every move and I again noticed I was still standing at the door. Taking a deep breath, I took a few steps into the apartment. He seemed amused but worried. I tried to stomp down on my nerves but they came back with a vengeance. This was becoming a bit overwhelming and the pressure to initiate was too much weight on my shoulders. I had no idea where to begin.

I had said I wouldn’t let my insecurities ruin anything, and yet here I was.

“Talk to me, 203.”

I sighed, “I just feel…overwhelmed.”

Namjoon was at my side quickly, but made no move to touch me again. I appreciate the bit of space. It was refreshing- especially after Taehyung grabbed me. I shook my head at the thought, upset that it had even made its way into this space. This was just us right now and that loser was not going to ruin it for me.

“What’s overwhelming?”

I avoided eye contact while I spoke. It made it easier for the words to come out.

“I don’t know how to take the next step,” I admitted. “I’m feeling a lot right now, and all of it is about you, and I’m scared I’ll ruin something. I always ruin my relationships and I don’t want this to stop. I like you too much.”

Instead of laughing Namjoon asked me if we could sit and talk this out. Going to the futon, the small couch gave us little room from one another. Knees touching, I fidgeted with my hands and waited for him to say something.

“Look at me,” He said, gently bringing my face to meet his own. “Don’t think like that, okay? There’s nothing you could do right now that would ruin this.”

“But-”

“There are no ‘buts,’” He shot down my argument before it had even begun. “Whatever happened before this can’t change, but I know you. Whoever the fuck made you think you ruined something is an idiot, okay?”

I nodded, still not fully believing him. I would laugh about this tomorrow when the fears were pushed aside to see reason. All night I was reminding myself that he liked me, that he wanted me, and that all these thoughts were pointless. Still I had let them ruin the night. I wanted to punch myself in the face.

“Y/N,” Namjoon called to me. I looked up again. I hadn’t even noticed I looked away. “We don’t have to do anything. We can just sit here and watch a movie or something. Whatever you want.”

I shook my head, “It’s not about not wanting to. I’m just a bit nervous about being the person to initiate.”

He frowned, “And that’s all this is? You really look shaken up, 203.”

I smiled despite myself. My dad was right, I really was a drama queen. I nodded, placing my hands over his.

“The last guy I slept with made me do all the work and then told his friends I was the worst lay he ever had,” I slipped my eyes closed. I did not want to see his face right now. The memory was far too embarrassing and I could hear the way they all laughed at me. “I’m just afraid of fucking up again.”

A light tap on my cheek made me open my eyes.

Namjoon looked so devastated. I wasn't sure if I hated the way people laughed when I told them about it or just how upset he was. You would have thought he had told me that had happened to him with how much his eyebrows wrinkled. Overcome with the need to minimize the experience, I opened my mouth to speak but was cut off with a kiss.

As if a switch was flipped, he was suddenly all over me. His hands held my face to his while he got impossibly closer. Body pressed up against mine, I shuttered when his hands ran down my neck. His calluses were rough and tugged on my skin. A soft moan escaped my lips at the feeling and Namjoon pulled away.

“Tell me when you want something to stop,” He rasped.

I nodded, already going back in for more. I have no idea how long we were on that futon, it could have been minutes, hours, even days. I was drunk in his presence and feeling him on my body was like heaven. His hands traveled from my neck to my chest. He hesitated for a second before finally cupping my breasts.

With another burst, Namjoon moved his hands to my waist and laid me down as best as he could on the tiny piece of furniture. I hoped we would move to his bed soon but was afraid of speaking. I wasn’t sure how my voice would sound and I was happy with the way things were going.

Stradling one of my legs, Namjoon was over me again. His lips were searing against my skin and I could not stop the soft sounds that came from my mouth. With every kiss and lick on my body, my panties got wetter and wetter. His hands ran up my body and were back on my boobs and started to gently knead them. I squeezed my eyes shut and whined.

“You’re so pretty,” Namjoon whispered, nipping at my neck.

My breathing was heavy now and I raised my heads and buried them into his hair. Namjoon groaned into my throat before finally detaching himself from my neck. He smiled at me, all teeth and dimples, and I wasn’t able to stop myself from smiling back. He looked so young like this. His lips were swollen and red alongside his flushed cheeks. Sitting up, Namjoon looked towards his bed before coming back to me. I grinned and nodded.

In a flash, he was lifting me off of the sofa. I giggled, grabbing onto him and wrapping my legs around his waist. His hands held onto my thighs as he stood up with me in his arms. Walking across the room, we were both laughing. I realized my nerves were gone now.

Throwing me on the bed, I yelled in surprise but Namjoon was back over me before I even hit the mattress. With new found confidence, I ran my hand over his chest. He paused, lifted himself up slightly, and allowed my hand to explore. He was hard against my hand. I knew he liked to go biking and hiking, and even went to the gym three times a week, but I was still taken aback by how solid he felt underneath my hands. It was a crime it had taken me this long to reach out and touch him like this.

Without much thought, I unbuttoned the top button on his dress shirt. He sucked in a deep breath. Snapping my eyes up to meet his own, a thrill shot down my spine. He looked starved. Keeping my eyes on his, I unbuttoned the next one. I got five more undone before he grew tired of waiting. Ripping the shirt over his head, my mouth went dry.

He was gorgeous. Tanned skin and hard muscles flexed with his every movement. He did not have defined abs, something I had not expected, but his stomach was toned and chiseled. Soft curves and lines had me dazed and I reached out to touch them. His stomach tightened under my hands and I grinned. He was so pretty.

“Can I take your shirt off?” He asked, voice deeper than I had ever heard it before.

Not saying anything, I lifted my arms and waited. His fingers grazed my ribs as he took the turtleneck off. I shivered once the cool air hit my skin and wondered if he noticed how cold his apartment was. I hissed once my arms were free and laughed when the neck got stuck around my head. Helping him get it the rest of the way off, I instinctively covered my chest.

“Let me turn the heater on,” He mumbled, eyes glued to my exposed skin.

He acted like peeling himself from my body had physically pained him. Walking across the room, he went to a space heater I had not noticed earlier. It was tall and spun from side-to-side as it blew the warm air around the room. I sat up and smoothed my hair down. Namjoon looked at me and his eyes immediately dropped to my bra.

In an act of boldness, I decided to peel my pants off myself. Watching the linen go down my legs, Namjoon unbuckled his belt and let it clang to the floor. I was almost disappointed knowing it would not be joining us tonight.

I had never even been spanked in bed let alone dived into impact play.

He crossed the room quickly and dragged me further up the bed. My head was on the mass of pillows he kept while he drank in my body. I knew my underwear was too plain and normal for something like tonight, and I apologized before I could stop myself.

“Sorry for what?” He asked, his voice so soft and gentle. “God, you’re so hot.”

Heat pooled to my stomach and I almost groaned in embarrassment. There had to be a wet spot on my panties now and he would more than likely be able to see it. Reaching up, Namjoon laid his hand on my cheek.

“Still doing okay?”

I sighed, “Just feeling insecure.”

“Talk to me about it.”

Trailing little kisses on my chest, he waited. Somehow, I knew he was listening to me even if he was occupied with getting into my pants. I arched my back slightly and gave him more access to my skin.

“I’m worried about my underwear,” I gasped. “And if you think I’m a virgin or something.”

He chuckled darkly. “Why would I think that?”

I placed my hands on his shoulders to ground myself. He was sucking on the spot just behind my ear and I had to bite my lip to stop the wanton sounds from coming out. I just noticed how violently my legs were shaking.

“Because I’m so nervous,” I managed.

“So am I,” He whispered in my ear. “And you look nice in white.”

He bit my ear lobe and pulled it down. I couldn’t stop the moan this time. I felt his dick twitch against my stomach. Trying to force myself to relax again, I ran my hands down his back. He was so soft and smelled heavenly. He placed a hand on my right bra strap.

“Want to keep going?”

I reminded myself once again about how vulnerable he was being with me tonight. He was being gentle for my benefit- not his. He was checking in because he wanted me to feel good, too. He had told me months ago the only things he fucked were the things he liked. I hoped he liked me more than all of the rest. Taking another deep breath, I nodded.

“Baby,” His voice was back to the seductive tone it had been before, making my pussy flutter. He had never called me that before. “You’re shaking.”

I whined openly now, his fingers hooking underneath the straps and pulling them down my shoulders. Reaching behind me, he unhooked the unflattered piece of white fabric and pulled it down my arms. Bare chested and cold, I trembled. I wanted him to touch me.

His hands were on my boobs and I bucked my hips when his thumb brushed over my nipple. He hissed, angled his hips against my own, before playing with the buds freely. I grinded against him, whining in pleasure.

He rotated between pinching them and rolling them, but with each flick and burst of pain I moved against him. He was so hard on me and I wished he would take his pants off so I could feel him properly.

Leaning down, he took a nipple into his mouth while playing with the other. I cursed, arching further into him and whined. My pussy gushed and my panties were sticking to my folds now. He removed one of his hands from my chest and switched sides. His right hand traveled down my stomach and into my underwear.

My legs tensed in anticipation. I was so turned on and I wanted him everywhere all at once. His fingers found my clit quickly and Namjoon groaned into my skin.

“You’re so wet,” He bit my boob.

Sitting up, he watched his hand playing with my pussy through my underwear. I closed my eyes and got lost in the pleasure. I felt one of his fingers circling my entrance and sobbed. It slipped in with no resistance and I swore I heard Namjoon moan along with me.

It was careful at first, prodding and exploring my walls until it found the spongy spot that made my toes curl. He whispered sweet nothings into the air around us, but I could barely hear him. He was far away now and all I could feel was the shocks of electricity that ran through my body.

My mouth hung open and I could hear the moans and groans escaping me. I was too gone to care about how desperate I sounded or the fact that our neighbors could hear. The irony almost brought me out of my paradise. No wonder those women screamed at the top of their lungs.

When he added another finger, I screamed. My face was wet but I had no idea if it was sweat or tears. I couldn’t think of anything anymore. My stomach twisted and tightened and I heard my shouts getting louder and louder.

“That’s it baby,” Namjoon groaned, keeping up the pace. “I got you. Cum all over me.”

The dam inside of me broke then and a waterfall gushed all over his fingers. My panties were soiled and damp, my cum sticky and white. Chest heaving, I opened my eyes and looked at Namjoon.

He was already unbuttoning his pants with his free hand. I started to pull my panties down and he removed his hand. With his pants off, he made a move to put his fingers back against my sopping cunt, but I grabbed his wrist. I needed so much more.

“Please,” I cried. “Please. Want you, I want you so bad.”

His eyes dilated and I could almost see the way he held back the animal inside of him. He was trying to be soft. I hooked a leg around his waist and lifted my hips to meet him. He was big and so painfully hard I almost felt bad. I rubbed against him once, then twice, before he shoved me away.

“Daddy.”

I didn’t realize the word was out of my mouth until his eyes snapped. Whatever had been keeping him at bay, whatever he had been telling himself about me, was gone. Black eyes devoured me and I licked my lips in anticipation.

“What?” His voice was cold and hard.

I was so embarrassed, but still did not care to stop this train. I wanted him so badly, needed to feel him all over me, and I was sure he would give me everything I could ever want and more with a single word. This time I was far more hesitant when I said it, the strange wave of desperation gone.

“I want you,” I swallowed hard, looking him in the eye. “Daddy, please.”

“Tell me if I’m too much,” He said, his last shred of chivalry gone.

Pulling his boxers down, I sucked in a breath at the sight of him. He was swollen, his tip dark, foreskin pulled back by his hand, and fat with precum oozing from his slit. Thick and long, Namjoon’s cock was so perfect and pretty it was hard to believe it was real.

“Hand me a condom,” He whispered, “They’re in the wooden box next to the lamp.”

Reaching over, the box was on top of the bookshelf. Taking one of the condoms, I ripped it open with my teeth and took it out myself. I barely thought about it when I reached out towards him. When I grabbed his dick, Namjoon threw his head back and cursed. It took less than a minute to slide it on and lay back down.

“You’re a fucking slut, aren’t you?” His voice was light and airy.

The degradation caught me off guard, giving me pause, but his hands were already grabbing ahold of my legs roughly. Bending them back on my chest, Namjoon held them in place with his forearm while he reached down to line up with my entrance. I shuttered and tried to push up into him. His arm held me down and pushed into my skin even more.

“Look at you,” He mocked. “Grinding against my dick like the little whore you are.”

He pushed into me and my eyes rolled to the back of my head. He was so big and I felt the stretch instantly. The burning was mild and despite the crude way he spoke to me, he took his time and massaged my thighs. With his arm off my legs, I lifted my hips and took him in deeper. He growled.

“Fucking filthy,” He slapped my thigh, the sting making me moan, and suck in deeper. “You’re so fucking tight, princess.”

I moaned, hooking my legs around his waist and pushing him into me while I lifted my hips. I was so full and the slight curve he had brushed against my g-spot at this angle. My mind was swimming and words felt heavy on my tongue.

“Right there,” I slurred. “Fuck, right there.”

He pulled out and pushed back in. I cried out, my body shaking and trembling underneath him. He held my legs in place before fucking into me. I played with my nipples and grinded down into him to keep the pace.

“God,” He groaned. “You feel so fucking good. Holy shit.”

Lifting one of my legs, Namjoon placed it on his shoulder and angled his hips. Now, he hit the spot anytime he moved inside of me. Screaming, I let my hand travel down to my clit and began to rub circles on the swollen bud.

“That’s it, baby,” He cooed. “Cum around my cock. Fuck.”

Gritting my teeth, I wailed. Hot pressure built up in my stomach again and I knew it didn’t stand a chance. I removed my hand from my clit and the pressure went down. I wanted to wait for him.

A hard slap against my thigh made me open my eyes. Namjoon was covered in sweat, his hair sticking to his forehead, and his mouth was agape. With a heated glare, he dropped my leg. I brought them both up to my chest and screamed. He felt so good, too good, and I felt the bubble building up again.

Namjoon’s thumb found my clit and I thrashed. His other arm held my legs down against my chest. Pounding into me, I was crying now and thought I would die if I came again. Nothing had ever felt like this before.

“I’m so close,” He rasped, staring at the way our bodies connected.

“Fuck,” I whined, shaking.

I came again, long and hard, while my body convulsed and twitched. I was exhausted but I knew Namjoon hadn’t finished yet. Keeping my eyes open, I squeezed down on his cock and waited. The pleasure had made me dumb and words failed me. Nothing made sense anymore, and I wanted to sleep. Moaning despite the oversensitivity, I held on for dear life as Namjoon emptied into the condom.

My legs were sore and stiff, the blood rushing through them causing pins and needles to shoot down them. Namjoon rubbed them and slowly placed them on either side of his body. Slowly, he pulled out and I winced. I was going to feel this in the morning. Taking the condom off, he tied it and went to the kitchen to throw it away.

“Don’t move,” He said. “I’m going to get a towel to wipe you off.”

I was fighting to keep my eyes open so I just let him clean me up. I was far too tired to fight him about it and I thought it was pointless regardless. If he wanted to take care of me then I would let him.

He was back a few moments later and wiped my body off with care. He asked if I could get up so he could change the sheets, and I was able to force my body off the bed. There was a huge puddle where I had been, so I was grateful he was thinking of my hygiene when all I wanted to go was sleep.

“Do you want me to go?” I asked, yawning.

“No,” He replied. “Do you want to leave?”

“No.”

He quickly changed the sheets and got a new blanket for us. I still didn’t get back into bed just yet. Awake enough to pick up my panties, I wrinkled my nose at the thought of putting them back on. I hated going commando.

“Want to go get a new pair?” Namjoon asked, noticing my predicament.

I frowned, “It’s fine. I’ll be good with a shirt.”

He threw a plain white tee onto the bed.

“Thanks.”

I was expecting to feel more awkward than I did. The sex was good, great even, and the silence in the room wasn’t scary. I knew Namjoon was thinking and I was happy to let him. I needed a moment to get myself together.

Where did we go from here? I was already being called his girlfriend, we were obviously crazy about one another, and I knew I was getting deeply involved with him now. I could love him and that alone was enough for me to want things to work out. Knowing that I would love him one day was a comfort.

Crawling into bed, I was upset that my teeth were unbrushed, but sharing toothbrushes was far away. I would scrub them really well in the morning and be fine with that. I had never been more excited for a Saturday before. Namjoon was beside me after turning off the lights.

Darkness surrounded us as he came closer to my body. These were moments I rarely experienced. Cuddling and loving touches after sex were a rarity in the past and something I had always craved. Settling in his arms, I laid my head on his chest and closed my eyes. His heartbeat was steady and loud against my ear.

“Are you going home for Christmas?” Namjoon suddenly asked.

I knew he had been thinking hard about something.

“I am,” I sighed. “Hopefully it’ll be a good year this time.”

“What makes you say that?”

Namjoon was somewhat aware of the strained relationship I had with my parents. We had talked about my weird Thanksgiving break and the even weirder holidays before that. He always said my parents would come around, but I knew he would never understand just how wishy-washy they were. His family was a constant support in his life.

“My dad’s getting weirder and weirder,” I answered. “It used to be my mom and I bumping heads constantly, but after I moved out we got better. Dad and I got worse. I don’t know what he wants from me.”

Rubbing random patterns on my back, Namjoon got quiet again. Taking that as my cue to become a bit more open, I decided to keep talking.

“He hates what I do. He was hoping I’d be in Chicago for my entire life, become a school teacher or something simple, and get married. Harvard was a dream, and he thought I’d get into law like him when the letter came in, but after I said geology everything just got weird. He never got along with my grandpa and thought he had brain washed me or something. I don’t even know anymore it’s all so convoluted.”

“But things were already weird before then.”

I nodded, “He didn’t like me speaking my mind or having an opinion that he didn’t agree with. We’re far too alike and argue constantly.”

“And your mom?”

I sighed. That was the worst part of everything. I loved them both so much, but neither one of them loved me enough to just be happy for me. They wanted this fantasy they had to play out in their head. Mom would choose dad any day of the week if it meant she stayed comfortable. Dad would pick mom because she never pushed him too far and let him get his way.

“She just wanted me to keep the family together.”

“Why are you going home then?” He asked. “Why even let them ruin your holiday?”

“He said-”

“Everything I’ve heard about the guy tells me that’s bullshit.”

I was shocked he interrupted me. He must have been thinking long and hard about this sort of conversation. I closed my mouth and listened to what he had to say. It had been a long time since someone agreed with my feelings.

“Even if he said he wouldn’t fight with you, even if he apologized, every time you go home he just treats you poorly. You’ve missed multiple holidays with your family because of his temper tantrums and were miserable in Chicago. Why go?”

I thought about his question. Why was I going? Because he said he was sorry? He apologized every year and still managed to make everything about him. How I wrong him. How I was the one destroying our family. How I left him alone. I had said I was going, I had the ticket and flight information, but did I really want to go home? I had more fun in my apartment alone then dealing with the scream matches over nothing.

“He cried,” I replied.

“To guilt trip you. He cried to make you feel bad about him disrespecting you and degrading you. He barely even apologized.”

Namjoon was right, but what else could I do? Call home and tell them I changed my mind? Get blamed for their failing marriage again? That did not sound nice either. I could say it was work but that would add credibility to their arguments. Mom would be so disappointed.

“Why are you asking me about Christmas?”

“I want you to come home with me.”

It brought a smile to my face even if I did feel a bit uncomfortable with him saying all of that to convince me to cancel my travel plans. Was it just to make me go with him? That was something my dad would do. I took a few deep breaths and thought about Namjoon and his character. No, he would not do that. He was just talking with me about my parents and wanted to see if I would rather spend my holidays with him.

“Would your family be okay with that?” I asked.

“Most definitely,” I could hear the smile in his voice. “My parents would really like you and my sister is going to be excited for another STEM girl in the house. We will have to sleep separately, though. My parents are old school.”

I laughed. From what he tells me, their home is very small and I would be asleep on the living room floor. Still, I felt much better about this trip than visiting home. It was sad that meeting my boyfriend’s family gave me less anxiety than going home.

“I’d like to come,” I yawned. “I’ll figure out my parents later.”

He kissed the top of my head.

“Night, 203.”

I grinned, “Night, 201.”

Four Months Later

Staring at the screen, I reread the email for the fourth time.

From: [email protected] To: Y/L/N.Y/[email protected] Date: March 23, 2023 Subject: Next Steps

Y/N,

Thank you so much for taking the time to interview with us for the Invertebrate Researcher position here at AMNH. I have some GREAT news to share! Our team enjoyed getting to know you and we’d like to move to the next stage of our hiring process. Could you provide me with two references of yours, preferably a former manager or colleague? If you could fill out the below information as soon as possible, that would be greatly appreciated!

Reference #1: Title: Phone Number: Email:

Reference #2: Title: Phone Number: Email:

Feel free to contact me if you have any questions moving forward and I would be happy to help. Looking forward to hearing from you to continue this exciting process!

- Tanya Lopez Talent Acquisition Specialist Human Resources American Museum of Natural History C: (212) 555-5555 Pronouns (she/her) -

I picked up my phone and called Wren. Namjoon was in class right now and telling him would have to wait. She picked up on the third ring, her excitement and joy already making me smile. I had text her when I saw the email notification.

“So?” She demanded. “What did she say?”

Wren had been the most nervous for me. This position was a huge deal and would be a game changer for my resume. Namjoon and Kendall were both convinced I had the job before I even applied, and Jungkook said he’d be there for me if it didn’t work out. He was trying to ease up on the drinking after Kendall gave him a bit of an intervention. I was happy he sounded more like himself the last time we spoke.

“You’re talking to their newest researcher.”

“Ah!” She screamed, yelling to Jimin about the new job. “I’m so excited! This is huge! New York, babes!”

I laughed, “I know right? God, Joon is going to flip.”

“How are you feeling about long distance?”

In typical Wren fashion, she had been the one person who leaned into my fears when I first talked about the job. Where Jungkook said we would make it as long as we made the effort, Wren was worried that we would break up as soon as I got the job. After many conversations with Namjoon, though, I felt much better about the whole thing. Like he said, Boston was only a 4 hour drive from New York and I would be staying out of New Rochelle which would ease the drive up a bit. Not by much but he could avoid the brunt of most of the NYC traffic.

“They’ll be fine, Jagi,” I heard Jimin in the background. “Stop worrying so much.”

“I’m the best friend,” She snapped back, defensive and hurt. “It’s my job to worry, Jimin.”

“Hey now,” I scolded. “Leave my best friend-in-law alone.”

“I’m going to miss you so much,” Wren whined, completely ignoring us both.

Now we are on to phase 2: denial. I shook my head and listened as she whined about how far away I would be. I reminded her it was a four hour car ride, but she reminded me that we had never lived more than twenty minutes away from each other since we’d met.

“But think about it Wren,” I soothed, going for the only thing I had left. “Day shopping in New York City, grabbing some pizza at a jazz club late at night, and all of those fancy furniture stores.”

I would apologize to Jimin later. Wren had a horrible habit of throwing out brand new furniture and buying all new shit once a year. Sometimes twice. I was lucky to get a few new pieces for my apartment years ago, but I could just imagine her going to every Pottery Barn in the city to find something to replace. She had been talking about how boring her dining table was.

“Oh! We could give you some things for your new place and go shopping for ours.”

I winced. I would need to make that apology sooner rather than later. My phone buzzed and I saw an incoming call from Namjoon.

“Boyfriend’s calling. Go to go.”

“Laters.”

Hanging up with Wren, I answered Namjoon’s call.

“Hello Ms.Newly Employed.”

I rolled my eyes, “You don’t even know if I got the job.”

“Did you?” I had sent him the same text as Wren.

“Yes.”

“My mom’s going to be so happy for you.”

Christmas had been very nice. Of course, my parents were as angry as I expected them to be. That phone call made me realize no matter what I did they would be upset. I had even tried to explain to them that I was seeing someone, and it had fallen on deaf ears in the face of their wants. I felt bad for a few days until Namjoon reminded me that was what my dad wanted. I stopped thinking about it after that and hadn’t heard much since. No random gifts or late night phone calls. Complete radio silence.

Namjoon’s family really was every bit as warm and inviting as I imagined them to be. His mother was so happy to meet me and his father was happy to talk about my career. I slept on a cot in the living room for the first two days until his mother decided she liked me too much and allowed us in the same room. She had made a few jokes about grandkids, but I wasn’t sure just how joking they were.

His sister showed up the following week and it was a dream. Her mind was so bright and expressive, and I adored the young girl not even an hour after meeting her. It was the first holiday in years that I was able to relax with a cup of cocoa and not worry when I would be kicked out. I promised them to come back for Spring Break.

“I’ll be sad I can’t see you everyday.”

He laughed, “I’ll be down there every weekend and you’ll visit when you can.”

I smiled, “I know but that doesn’t change anything. At least I know your schedule already.”

The Project Manager position was a bust, but he took it in stride. He thought about joining the research team at Harvard, but I saw him looking at an adjudicate position at NYU for next fall. I hoped we would last that long, and that he thought about the decision before jumping the gun. He always did but I knew what emotions could do to someone’s judgment. Either way, I would be happy for him.

“I’m going to write this woman back,” I said, already composing my reply. “I’ll see you in a bit.”

“How about going to Harvest to celebrate.”

I laughed out loud.

“Babe, we can’t afford Harvest.”

“Now, now,” His voice went up an octave. “I am willing to take out a small loan to wine and dine you.”

“My hero,” I mocked. He snorted. “We can hit up Santouka’s if you want to eat in Harvard Square.”

“I’m always happy to get ramen.”

After finalizing our plans and hoping we could rope in a few friends to go out with, we hung up. I was happy with the way things were going and I couldn’t ask for a better boyfriend. I was sad to be so far away but I had to have faith it would all work out. Even if it meant long drives and days lost, I knew Namjoon was worth every second of it.

From: Y/L/N.Y/[email protected] To: [email protected] Date: March 23, 2023 Subject: RE: Next Steps

Good afternoon Ms.Lopez,

I am so happy to hear that! Working with AMNH is a dream come true and I am so honored to have the opportunity. Below I have given you both of the references you have asked for as well as two additional. I want to be sure you get the references you need and Dr.Lupon can be tricky to get in touch with by phone. Thank you again and I appreciate all of your help during this process.

Dr. Abigail Lupon, Ph.D. (617) 444-444 [email protected]

Morgan Dawson Ph.D Candidate (206) 777-7777 [email protected]

Dr. Christopher Jonas, Ph.D. (406) 222-2222 [email protected]

Dr. Alistair Moody, Ph.D. (617) 333-3333 [email protected]

Let me know if you need anything else and I look forward to working with you in the near future.

- Y/N Y/L/N Ph.D. Candidate in Paleontology Harvard University | Department of Earth and Planetary Sciences Mobile: (773) 999-9999 | Email: Y/N.Y/L/[email protected] Pronouns: She/Her/Hers -

It was impossible to believe I was leaving this place. These would be my last two months in my shit hole apartment, my last two months cleaning off bones in the lab, and my last two months living next door to my boyfriend. It was bittersweet but I knew I was making the right choice. Every decision I had made was leading to this moment.

I knew without a shadow of a doubt that my grandpa would be proud of me.

Two months later

This was it. Two names away from my own, I waited with bated breath for the Dean to call out my name for the third and final time. Beside me, Dr.Lupon smiled happily. She was more excited for my commencement than I was.

“Almost,” She mouthed to me and took a few steps back.

I was sitting on an end seat and would need to exit on that side. I knew she was supposed to be further towards the front but had switched with Dr.Jonas earlier this evening for “moral support.” We had gone through this multiple times and yet she still insisted on chaperoning me everywhere. It was as endearing as it was embarrassing. Somewhere behind me a large group of my friends were waiting to scream as soon as I stood up.

Then, it happened. All twelve years I had been at Harvard were flooding through my mind as I stood. My first day, living in the dorms and loathing my roommate, and the first time I had ever stepped inside of the museum. I recalled the first time I met Dr.Lupon and the whirlwind she had become in my otherwise dull life. Late night dinner with Jungkook, the first time I saw Wren, and all of the beautiful moments that led up to seeing Jimin at a P.C. frat party.

I remember when Kendall’s hair touched her chin and she was fresh faced. Before the ambulances and dead bodies, Kendall had been so excited to contribute to the world. Heartbreak after heartbreak and wasted tears on men who never deserved my time. Taehyung came to mind and I almost laughed. God, that guy was such a loser.

I had found out a few weeks after we bumped into one another in the parking lot the reason he had been so weird. His friend, Seokjin, had come by to get some stuff for his dog and spilled the beans. Apparently, Taehyung had only asked me out because he thought I would be an easy fuck. Jin told him to leave me alone since I worked at the only pet store open so late, but the idiot really went for it. His pride was hurt when it didn't work, and he was convinced I was simply playing hard to get. He stopped stalking me after Namjoon cornered the two of them at the gym the next morning. It would seem that Taehyung's bark was much bigger than his bite.

Taking my diploma from the Dean, I smiled blindingly at him and shook his head with as much force as I could. Today was perfect. Today was not the end of my story, but the beginning. Coming back to the present, I giggled as Namjoon’s loud cheers reached my ears. I swore I heard Jimin and Wren singing 'We Are The Champions,' but I would have to ask to make sure.

Harvard would forever be a part of my life, memories far too precious to forget, but I was ready to move on. Looking at the photographer across the way, I quickly posed with my diploma and went back to my seat. Stealing a look behind me, I found Namjoon and his family standing in a large group, our friends all waving and blowing kisses our way. A small ache settled in my heart that my own parents had not come, but I could not let it ruin this. I had spent 12 years at Harvard, all of them beautiful, but now it was time for me to move on. Today was only the beginning.

Taglist: @swoozleee @jub-jub @callmenoona25 @coolchick23 @saweetspoiled

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taesclub · 10 months

Text

The Wild Child, Act I ✦ BTS

✦ BTS x Fem! Oc's

━━━━━ ( SYNOPSIS. ) She is suddenly forced to attend the all-girls boarding school, St. Victoria's. Determined to break free, she tries to escape. Her only problem? To do so she must go through the neighboring boarding school and its notorious group, the Bangtan boys. Among them, one member captivates her the most, blurring the line between rebellion and romance.

genre. boarding school au, angst, fluff, smut

word count. 4,586

warnings. only curses for now

-ˋˏ masterlist ✦ next ˎˊ-

ACT I.

━━━━━━━━━ ✦

Claire, a tall girl with an eighty's aura and a shag haircut, sits in the passenger seat of her father's car, her arms crossed tightly over her chest. The car hums with tension as they drive down the road, the passing scenery reflecting the girl's inner turmoil. She was about to meet her doom.

She gazes out the window, her expression a mix of anger and frustration. The weight of her resentment hangs heavy in the air.

“I can't believe you're making me go to some stupid all-girls boarding school, Dad. This is so unfair!” she grimaces. This had been her constant complaint ever since receiving the news, but somehow, like a broken record, she still held onto those words, praying it would be enough to make her dad rethink his decision. It wasn’t.

Her father, Mr. Deschamps, a middle-aged man with tired eyes due to his rushed businessman life, glances at her with a mixture of concern and regret. “Claire, we've talked about this. It's a better opportunity for you. You'll have a chance to focus on your studies and discover new interests.” he insists softly.

Claire scoffs, her frustration boiling over.

Her voice sounds angry as she replies, “Better opportunity?! What about my life here? My friends? You're ripping me away from everything I know!”

Her father's grip tightens on the steering wheel, his tone laced with remorse.

“Claire, honey, I didn't make this decision lightly. It's for your future. You'll make new friends, and have new experiences. Please try to understand.”

Claire's gaze remains fixed on the passing scenery, her umbrage simmering beneath her rebellious exterior. “You simply don't get it, Dad,” she says resentfully as the view keeps changing dramatically into a more rural area. “You don't know what it's like to be uprooted from everything familiar, to start over in some stuffy boarding school.”

Her father's voice softens, laced with a tinge of sadness. “I know it's hard, honey,” he admits sincerely. “But sometimes, we must make sacrifices for the greater good. Trust me, I only want what's best for you.”

Claire's anger doesn’t wane, even though she is tempted to soothe at her dad’s words. “Change can be scary, but it also opens doors to new opportunities.” he continues, tenderly. “You're strong, Claire. You'll adapt, and who knows, you might find something incredible out here.”

Her gaze shifts from the passing greenery outside to her father's warm and understanding eyes. She takes a deep breath, slowly releasing the pent-up frustration. There was no point discussing this with him, he would never back up on his word. And the truth was, ever since he got together with that Malibu Barbie wannabe called Blanche, this was destinate to happen. She had waited for the rug to be pulled from under her feet as her distrust in life itself was a rooted injustice carved deep in her heart, but now that it happened, she tried desperately to hold onto a shimmer of hope.

And how tricky it was to expect, to wait for someone else to take the reins of one’s life... No one would come and save her, that was clear. So why not save herself?

“Sure thing, Dad.” Claire mumbles resigned. At least for now.

A bittersweet silence fills the car as they continue their journey, both aware that this new chapter holds challenges and possibilities that neither can fully anticipate. The beginning of a plan to escape the boarding school, however, started to thread like a lightning bolt in the girl’s mind.

She would make sure no one would see it coming. And one thing was certain, Claire Deschamps would never settle into a life in the middle of nowhere, nor a life she hadn’t chosen herself.

━━━━━━━━━ ✦

Claire steps out of her father's car, her jeans bomber jacket with wide shoulders and lots of sewn trinkets contrasting greatly with the more conservative uniforms of the other students passing by. Their plaid skirts had at least two full hands more fabric compared to the black leather one she used.

She takes a deep breath, bracing herself for what lies ahead. Mr. Deschamps opens the trunk, retrieving her suitcase and opening space for two employees to try and lift the big chest full of stickers that also belonged to Claire.

“Here you go, honey.” He hands the lush green suitcase to her. “I hope you find… Some great things here.”

She takes it, grudgingly. “Don’t be so disappointed when I don’t.”

Her father shows a sympathetic smile on his face as he pauses to take in what she had just said. “I understand, Claire.” He opts to say. “Take care of yourself. Call me if you need anything, okay?”

Claire nods, unable to hide her lingering resentment. Her father gives her a last reassuring smile before driving away.

As she sees the Rolls-Royce disappearing on the dirty road, the Headmistress Winters, a stern and composed woman in her fifties whom she had already seen printed on the flyer advertising the school, approaches Claire with an air of authority. The disapproving expression that she wears only exacerbates Claire’s dislike for her furthermore.

“You must be Miss Deschamps, our newest student,” the woman says, inspecting her closer. “I trust you had a pleasant journey?”

To that, Claire rolls her eyes discreetly, her guard already up. “Oh, joy,” she mutters under her breath.

Putting on a polite facade, the Headmistress takes a step further, “As you know, I am Headmistress Winters. Your father and I talked on the phone. Welcome to St. Victoria’s Academy. Here we expect our students to uphold the highest standards of discipline and academic excellence.” She waves her hand in a high class and fluid motion, introducing the grand structure of the school behind her.

There is a moment of silence as Claire fights the urge to scoff, her skepticism apparent.

“Sounds like a real party,” she mutters dryly under her breath.

Headmistress Winters's eyes narrow not catching what the girl has to say, however, judging by the lack of excitement on Claire’s part and her many years of experience when it came to building character, she maintains her composed demeanor. She knows a troublemaker when she sees one.

With thinly veiled annoyance she adds firmly, “Respect and compliance are expected from all students, Claire. You'll find that St. Victoria’s Academy offers numerous opportunities for personal development and camaraderie. I suggest you keep an open mind.”

Claire's expression remains guarded, her disdain for the headmistress palpable the more words fell from her mouth. Her tone is pure cynicism as she answers. “Sure, Mrs. Winters. I'll keep an open mind while I'm here.”

Begrudgingly, she follows the older woman through the school's grand entrance, the imposing architecture and hushed conversations heightening her unease.

The Hall of Entrance in the all-girls boarding school exudes an air of elegance and tradition. Polished marble floors stretch out beneath the students' feet, reflecting the soft glow of the chandeliers that hang overhead. Tall, arched windows line the walls, allowing sunlight to filter in and cast a warm, inviting glow on the surroundings.

As Claire steps into the hall after the Headmistress, she is greeted by a flurry of activity. Girls in crisp uniforms pass by more eagerly than the ones she saw outside, their eyes darting to and fro, their hushed whispers carrying snippets of gossip. The hall becomes a stage for both fellowship and rivalry, as cliques form and dissolve with each passing moment.

The sound of clicking heels and rustling skirts mingles with the gentle murmur of conversation, creating a symphony of feminine energy. Some girls walk with confidence, their heads held high, while others seem more reserved, their eyes darting nervously as they try to find their place within the social hierarchy.

Portraits of past headmistresses and notable alumnae adorn the walls, their stern gazes reminding the students of the institution's legacy and the high expectations placed upon them. Some peak Claire’s attention. One of the spaces in particular, the one dedicated to the sports league, shows boys’ teams and trophies they earned against them, but she can’t find the right moment to ask what it is about as Mrs. Winters walks like a thunderstorm.

The aroma of freshly polished wood and the faint hint of perfume linger in the air making her curiosity calmly dissipate, creating an atmosphere that is both refined and pansy.

A grand staircase, its banisters intricately carved, leads to the upper levels of the school. It serves as a focal point, drawing the eyes of the girls as they ascend and descend, their interactions playing out on the stage of the hall.

Claire becomes acutely aware of the watchful eyes as she makes her way through the bustling crowd, trailing the steps of Mrs. Winters. Some girls shoot her curious glances, sizing her up and speculating about the newcomer. Whispers trail in her wake, snippets of conversation filled with intrigue and speculation.

Mrs. Winters then suddenly turns to face her once more, revealing behind her shoulder line a girl who matches Claire’s height, with bangs and a cascade of hazel hair. The girl’s warm and open expression contrasts greatly with Claire’s defensive demeanor.

Noticing Claire’s disinterest, Mrs. Winters starts, “Let me introduce you to your new roommate, Claire. She’ll help you settle in.”

Extending her hand politely and rather excitedly, the girl before her greets, “Hi! I'm Ella. It’s really nice to meet you!”

Claire reluctantly shakes Ella's hand, her guard still up. Frustrated by the already lack of choice on her end she mumbles, “Yeah, hi.”

Headmistress Winters nods curtly, signaling the end of their interaction. “Miss Dubois, why don’t you show Claire to your dormitory and explain how things work around here? I was in the middle of a rather urgent matter when she arrived...”

Without missing a beat, Ella promptly nods, understanding the task at hand. “Sure thing, Headmistress. Follow me, roomie!”

The newfound nickname makes Claire hiss internally like a cornered cat, but she plays the part, thankful to finally get herself rid of the Headmistress's presence.

Before the two of them can walk further away, Mrs. Winters dismissively points again, “Very well, off you go. Make sure you familiarize yourself with the rules and expectations of this institution, Miss Deschamps.”

Claire raises an eyebrow, her rebellious spirit flickering to life. “I'll keep that in mind, Headmistress,” she replies defiantly, turning her back to the woman.

Leaving the bustling hall and the scrutinizing eyes of the older woman, Claire turns to Ella, a sense of complicity forming between them as she notices how much more relaxed her new guide seems to be.

Smiling, Ella reassures her. “I promise this is not all as daunting as it seems.” Claire takes a deep breath, her apprehension giving way to a glimmer of hope. She follows Ella, ready to navigate the challenges of this new environment, determined to find her place amidst the rules and expectations she so vehemently resents. Who knows?, she thinks, maybe her new roommate can give her an escape route without even noticing. She could be escaping St. Victoria’s much earlier than she had predicted.

━━━━━━━━━ ✦

Claire wasn’t convinced if Ella had what it takes to be her newfound ally. The headmistress seemed to trust her enough which made her either valuable to the plan or a stone in her shoe. Although Claire was pending more to the former since the girl seemed very friendly as they kept a light conversation and she led the way through the bustling hallways. More often than not, the veteran would gush about her own friends as she vibrantly pointed to Claire how their day-to-day was, and for moments, more than to seek intel to architect her plan, the brunette found herself momentarily forgetting about her purpose as she got infected by Ella’s contagious energy.

Their footsteps echo softly as they step onto the serene patio, where blooming flowers and neatly trimmed hedges create a serene oasis within the school grounds. The sound of laughter and animated conversations drifts through the air as girls gather in small groups, enjoying moments of respite and fellowship.

Claire’s eyes scan the scenery, and they get caught in the ruckus three girls are making right by the center fountain of the patio. The one standing in the middle, a blonde with a high ballerina bun, dances excitedly as she flashes a knitted scarf to her peers. “You think JK will like it?” Her voice travels through the open space as she points specifically to the initials engraved in it.

Noticing Claire’s mind is far away from whatever she is saying, Ella leans closer, whispering, “That’s Vivienne for you,” she chuckles as Claire’s glance shifts quickly back, “Everyone calls her Vivi and you’ll soon hate her too, trust me.”

To that statement, Claire’s eyes return inquiring to Ella’s, her nose scrunching in doubt.

“You see, she delusionally believes she and some trouble boy are meant to be. We’re all tired to hear about it, or witness moments like this.” Ella points with her head to the blonde once more. “There she goes, making him a scarf he won’t probably use. Tell me about waste of time!”

Claire mildly snorts entertained, looking at the scene as well. “Poor girl.”

“Oh, believe me!” Ella exhales, walking away and her roommate follows, “That one is nothing of the sort. Imagine Regina George in real life. That’s her, right there.”

In a lack of response from the brunette, Ella gestures towards a row of benches shaded by a grand oak tree. ”Anyways, this is our patio, Claire. It's the perfect spot to relax and soak up some sunshine during breaks. And see over there? That's the canteen.”

The delicious aroma of freshly cooked meals fills the air as soon as they step closer to the precinct. Girls line up at the serving counter, chatting and exchanging stories as they eagerly await their turn. The room is alive with vibrant colors, with posters and artwork adorning the walls, adding a touch of creativity to the space.

“We refuel here, obviously.” Ella glances excited to see Claire’s reaction. “The food is surprisingly good, and there's always a variety of options to choose from… Well. When the boys don’t join, that is. They can be savages.” she chuckles nonchalantly.

Suddenly Claire’s eyes perk with curiosity. Every bit of information she had gathered about the school before arriving said this was an all-girls academy, but then again, there were existent photos of boys displayed in the hall. Not to say Vivienne’s parade a second ago. Do they have a day off?, she muses, Could this be an opportunity? “What do you mean boys? Isn’t this an all-girls school?” she voices her thoughts as Ella takes the lead again, taking her on another stroll.

The energetic roommate greets some girls that pass by them with a sympathetic smile before returning her focus to the newcomer beside her.

“Well, yeah. The Alarie boarding school for boys is right across the river, and we often have classes together. You know, lack of teachers in the far countryside.” she shrugs.

Before she can inquire further, Ella is already distracted, smiling at the passersby.

“With Jimin? Again?! God, what’s her secret!” They hear a girl gasp to a friend as they crossways.

Oh. I see..., Claire’s thoughts put the pieces together. She quickly looks at the hazel-haired girl making her company.

By the raise of eyebrows that she gives her and the flicker of frolic that flashes in her eyes, Ella is quick to warn, “It’s strictly forbidden to hang out with them boys, Claire. No smogging. No funny hands.”

“But she just-” Claire refuted pointing behind her shoulders to the girl that passed by sharing her indignation a bit too loudly.

Ella gave her a warning yet laid-back glance, “Alright, people go on with it in secret but as you can see, nothing is really a secret around here. And then when you least expect it, bam! You’re in trouble!”

“Are they at least hot? Or I don’t know... Worth the trouble?”

Ella thinks for a second and then shrugs with a naivety Claire knows to be fake, “How would I know?”

“If you say so!” Claire pretends to salute dramatically, a bickering well read by the other as to the current square state the Academy insisted on following rules. And so, Ella pulls her to a quick jog entertained, and a bit tempted to show her new roommate she also knew how to break a few of them. Even if the rules she was breaking weren’t as grand as Claire deemed them to be. The students passing by confirmed the thought as they judged their behavior, and Claire laughed even louder at their tedious conformism. The rule about not running in the hallways was true indeed.

As they arrive at their shared dormitory, their footsteps grow softer as they enter the hushed ambiance of the living quarters. The dormitory is a cozy space adorned with tasteful decorations, featuring two neatly made beds, desks adorned with books and personal touches, and small corkboards for photos and reminders.

Ella jumps to sit on her own bed, bouncing on the mattress as she does so. “And here we are,” she gestures. “Our humble abode. It may not be the biggest, but it's home.”

Claire looks around the room, a hint of curiosity dancing in her eyes as she imagines the memories that will unfold within these walls, even if for brief moments. Ella seems a nice girl, but she won’t be around to discover much more about her. She needs to escape this. Her real friends await in the big city.

“Yeah, it's not bad…”

Ella grins with the comment, her warmth shining through.

“We'll make it cozy, you’ll see,” she says encouragingly. “Plus, you still have to meet my girls! They are rooming right in front of us. It’s great to share stuff and to keep gossip in day!” She laughs at her own behavior.

As Claire sets her suitcase down and begins to unpack, a bit aloof to her roommate’s words, a newfound sense of optimism fills the room. To Ella is the beginning of a new friendship, even if her roommate was a hard one to crack. But she was patient, everyone had their personal time after all. To Claire, it is a journey through a path she had never charted before, but her father was right about one thing---she is strong. And she will prevail.

“We’ll meet them in a few!” Ella continues, snapping Claire out of her thoughts, “They went to pick up your uniforms for you.”

Claire eyes her with gratitude, showing for the first time a smile, even if timid, and her roommate mimicked the action. Only hers was as big as her enthusiasm for finally having a friend to share her bedroom with.

Still sitting by her bed, Ella watches as Claire takes only her toiletries out of her green suitcase, as well as a portrait of her and what the girl gathered to be her mom. The tall wild child discards the pouch with her cosmetics by the bed, as she walks toward the bedside table, closely placed to the window, adjusting the portrait on top of it. Her clothes, still inside the suitcase, didn’t seem important and were left forgotten still inside it, untouched. Or so Ella thought so.

“Your mom is beautiful,” she comments gently, looking at how Claire’s eyes seem to hover with longing at the picture.

The brunette opens a small smile, thanking her roommate almost in a whisper, eyes still glued to the image of her mom. How she missed her.

And then suddenly a loud pang interrupts the moment, making her jump and Ella scream. Startled by the sudden impact of a ball against her bedroom window, she had fallen back onto her bed, her heart racing. She swiftly rises and storms towards the window again, fueled by annoyance and ready to unleash her frustration on the culprit responsible.

Seething with anger, Claire flings open the window of her dorm room on the second floor, ready to give the culprit a piece of her mind. Ella knees on her bed to look at the indicted herself. “Shit.” She manages to say.

Claire’s words, however, catch in her throat as she locks eyes with a boy she has never seen before, and taking by Ella’s reaction beside her, it was clear that wasn’t her case, her roommate knew him.

His mischievous grin and charismatic presence immediately captivate her, and a flicker of curiosity replaces her initial anger. Still, she stands her ground and through gritted teeth, she lashes, “What's your problem?!”

Both girls watch as he brings casually one of his hands to shield his eyes from the sun, his smile gleaming with amusement.

“Oh, I apologize, princess,” he says charmingly. “You weren’t supposed to-” he trails off, “Well, I wasn’t looking to make an impression on you but now…” he considers, his smile doubling the size.

Claire tries to maintain her composure, but there's an undeniable pull towards the Alarie’s boy that she can't ignore.

“Impression?” She scoffs slightly flustered, “If it’s at being stupid, you've certainly succeeded. Who are you anyway?”

The boy takes a step closer toward the shade of the tall building to see her better, a playful glint in his eyes as he keeps looking up chuckling at her response.

With a smirk, he replies. “You didn’t hear of me? I'm Jungkook,” he says as if it explains a lot, with a smugness that makes Claire crazy to punch out of his face. “I go to the Alarie’s, right next door.”

“JK!” another boy shouts from a distance, and Claire’s eyes travel to the field to meet the face of Jungkook’s peer. A group of boys is joyfully hanging out there, waiting for him.

As her eyes turn back to him, standing beneath her window, with a raised eyebrow, Jungkook says with yet another chuckle, “You never told me your name.”

She sneers, “And I won’t.”

Despite her refusal, Claire can't help but feel a certain curiosity pull toward Jungkook. His confidence and charm leave her intrigued, even if she tries to deny it or finds it too brazen.

Jungkook sends another intrigued look her way, a hint of mischief in his voice.

“Don't worry, princess. I’ll find it soon enough.” that answer only makes her blood boil further. “Besides, life's too short to be boring, don't you think? I like the mystery.” He shrugs with a smile, picking the rugby ball that was fallen by his feet, and starting to walk back. He turns once again to see her reaction, raising his voice as he adds, “And tell your rat roommate that the next one is meant for her!” He lifts the ball in his hand as if he raised a toast.

“I'm not fucking interested in your idea of excitement, Jungkook. Save your charm for someone else!” She shouts defiantly but he only laughs in response, now fully turning his back and jogging swiftly toward his friends.

She can't help but watch his back and carefree stance, even if Ella’s presence is made heard by her side. Under rushed and muted curses, the girl gets up from the bed, initiating an anxious breakdown as she paced back and forth inside their bedroom.

Claire’s gaze finally moves away from the window to fall upon her roommate’s state. “Not that it’s any of my business, but... You wanna talk about it?” she asks, gaining no response apart from a full stop on the pacing and Ella’s hands coming to a desperate grip on her own locks.

“Ella!” Claire calls her, closing the distance between them, “Hey, what’s going on?” The change of attitude of the girl was so brusque from her previous joyful self that it got her worried.

She gently touched her shoulder, and Ella’s eyes finally found her own. “I’m totally, completely, fucked.” She confesses finally.

“What happened? Is it about this Jungkook guy?”

The hazel-haired girl gives her a nod and Claire’s eyebrows knit together. She manages to inhale, ready to question further but they are interrupted by the cheerful tinkle of shoes and greetings.

“We got it!” It’s what she hears as she looks at the door to their room that had been left open. Two girls enter the space, both shorter than Ella and her. They look excited, probably having fun on the way there.

“Hi! You must be the new girl,” The shortest one says, giving her a cordial smile. She has her long honey-blonde hair held back by a bow. “I’m Lola, this is Avery...”

“And this is your uniforms!” While Lola has a royal aura to her, somewhat restrained and charismatic, Avery seems more upfront and girly. Her hair is like coal and so glossy that it shines hues of dark blue in the light.

Taking the folded clothes from her hands with a smile of her own, Claire introduces herself. “Thank you, I’m Claire. And you really didn’t have to do it-”

“It’s totally fine, we wanted to!” Lola insists bubbly, waving off, and the brunette smiles thankful.

The blonde walks her way toward Ella’s bed, familiar enough to sit on it as she grabs a pillow to hug as she did so.

“Girls. He knows.” To Claire’s relief, Ella finally enters the conversation. “I hate myself!” She adds, grunting.

She notices how the other two react fervently to the comment as she places the pile of uniforms on top of her bed, ceasing to be the focus of their attention. They look at Ella with staring eyes, clearly on topic but still indignant about the rest of the information that still doesn’t come.

“What do you mean he knows?!” Avery is the first to question. “How would he know? There were no boys in class that day...”

To which Lola quickly made a comment with a nudge at her waist, “I told you there was! Louis, remember?”

At the same time, Ella explained. “Now Jungkook sent a stupid ball flying up the window on purpose. After my head of course!”

While Claire looked from one to another trying to unveil the situation, both Avery and Lola unleashed a series of wroth exclamations, to what Ella took part in instead of actually providing a clearer explanation.

“I’m sorry.” Claire interrupted. “But can someone situate me here? What does this Jungkook know? And why is it a big deal? I’m lost.” She had a notion she was being brazen as she wasn’t close to the three friends before her, but not a couple minutes before she had witnessed a boy sending a warning in the shape of a rugby ball to her roommate. If this was to continue while she stayed there, she needed to know at least the basics.

Avery and Lola look from her to Ella apprehensively waiting. So this is mildly important, she thinks. And then the latter sighs.

“I wasn’t completely honest with you about the boys’ part...”

To that statement, Claire slowly realizes that there may be more to this school than meets the eye, and consequently, more that she needs to unravel to make her flight seem a mystery. Glancing out of the window, Alerie’s boarding school for boys is starting to feel like a needed pit stop, as it stands tall between St. Victoria’s building and her much-wanted freedom.

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bluenpjm · 11 months

Text

horus academy 5 — bts x oc

@singguks × @socksjinie × @bluenpjm

summary: in a school where greek methods rules, not everything is as clear as it appears to be. heart, mind, soul, and body. those are the teams of the horus academy and boarding school. but deep within the long corridors, lies dark secrets. the so-called loving families formed in the shapes of teams begin to tear when an anonymous source unravels their deepest secrets.

genre: high school au | mystery au | social au | angst | fluff

pairing: OT7 × OC’s

rating: M

word count: 15.2k

warnings: foul language, friends fighting, getting stalked, lies and threats, bullying. really, a lot of fights and harsh words.

chapters. 04, 05, 06 ✹ masterlist

Three days had passed since the games and the rumor still hadn’t died down.

People would stare and bluntly gossip whenever Jimin or even the rest of the group passed by in the halls. And the worst of it, for the group itself, was that the realization of it was indeed shocking. It was one thing being the talk of the hour because of teenage behavior regarding breaking into the boys' dorm rooms… Another was actually sleeping with a teacher while being a minor.

At first, Jimin had the brilliant idea of wanting to skip biology class on Tuesday morning, which everyone was against. It was decided that he would not only go to class as a normal and not guilty student would, but he was to behave and cut all communication with his lover for a little while. Just until the rumor died down and he could come to his senses and end the rendezvous himself.

Kaya, the one sharing biology class with him, kept a hawk’s watch on his moves. And Jimin was actually doing his best. She could easily buy the facade he was putting up. The one inciting fire to the rumor was Miss Bellum herself, who couldn’t help but look at the boy from time to time. And if Kaya was noticing it, the gossiping leeches were too.

As soon as the bell rang, Kaya shoved her notebooks into her purse and pulled Jimin by the arm, dragging him out of the class. His backpack was still half opened and he had to carry the biology textbook in his hand.

She turned the first corner she came into, and went down a few steps of the stairs, coming to a stop in its middle. Jimin looked at her completely lost, glancing at his sides to see if people were passing by or judging the moment as weird as he was.

“Wha–” he tried but she interrupted him in pure frustration.

“I can’t believe you told her!” she burst, still trying to be as quiet as possible so no one could hear. And before he had a chance to come up with a lie or an excuse to stall, Kaya continued. “Don’t even try and pretend you didn’t. She looked at you the whole time as if the world was ending and you were some abandoned dog!”

Jimin glanced back at the corridor before answering, he couldn’t shake the feeling that they were being watched all the time. “I had to, ok?” a tired sigh left his lips, and Kaya held her tongue so she could let him speak. Before continuing his reasoning, he put the textbook in his backpack, all while the girl looked anxiously at him. “She texted me on Sunday–Just to check on me after the fight with Archie! Relax!”

“How. Will. I. Relax, Park Jimin!” she slapped his arms outraged while he tried to evade it.

He searched for words but nothing seemed good enough so he opted to hug her instead. Kaya was as much on edge as he was. This wasn’t just a vendetta against him, this was a deliberate attack on the whole group. “Listen, I promised you guys I wouldn’t be in touch with her anymore and I’m not. But she deserved to know what was happening, so I told her, ok? Just so that if anything happened–If any student said something, she wouldn’t be caught unprepared. It was the least I could do.”

Kaya nodded in understanding. She could at least breathe more at ease, and she held Jimin for a few seconds more, wishing that she could wake up from this nightmare named You.

Before their moment of peace could last a little longer, Jimin’s phone buzzed in his front pocket, taking an arrow straight at both his and Kaya’s heart. Not again, he feared.

They broke away from the embrace. She anchored herself on the wall behind her, crossing her arms to form a shield against whatever was coming their way. Jimin, in turn, reached for the device while mustering the courage he still had.

Kaya saw his eyes reading the message but she couldn’t decipher his face. From where she was standing, and the way his eyebrows slightly furrowed, it didn’t look good. She gulped. “So?”

“It’s Tae.” he said apprehensively, taking a quick look at her face.

The air escaped her lips and he saw her entire body relax. Recomposing herself she questioned, “You still haven’t talked about it?” to which he shook his head. “Well… Good luck with that.”

With a not-so-cheerful pat on his shoulder, Kaya was quick to leave her friend on the empty flight of stairs to resume her schedule.

The sun shined bright in the sky, and although Elena was lying down on their usual table bench outside, she couldn’t seem to enjoy the warm beaming on her skin peacefully.

Yoongi, Jin, and Jungkook sat by the table with her, while they waited for the twins to grab something from the cafeteria for their lunch. And although two of them were contributing to her quiet beauty nap, Jin couldn’t help but throw in assumptions of who could possibly be You.

“Listen, I wouldn’t doubt that Archie was psycho enough to just come at us,” Elena could hear him say, “I’m just saying it isn’t his style at all to come at someone through social media.” and although none of them responded to it, she could tell that both Yoongi and Jungkook were thinking about his reasoning because so was she. Jin had a point. And so he continued rambling, “He’s too… Aggressive to be just like–Oh I know your secret ha ha ha! I feel like he would at least brag about it while taking a punch at our beautiful faces.”

“Yeah,” Yoongi agreed. “The problem here is that we know nothing about this You person to even try and assume who it is…”

A defeated silence followed. It was enough for Elena to open her eyes, only to have to turn her face on the bench so as to not be blinded by the light. She couldn’t see the boys, since they were all sitting on the other side of the table, but she could watch how some students passed by. Even from far away, they would glance at them with judgemental eyes. She inhaled impatiently.

“What’s taking them so long, by the way?” Jin was the kind of person that lived in the moment. And at this moment at least, food was more important. Elena’s stomach would agree, but her head was seething with possibilities. And so she sat up, making the three boys before her pay attention.

She inquired, “What if we got to know something about You?” they looked at her pondering. “Even the smallest detail would help, right?”

“And how we’d manage that?” Jungkook finally spoke up, while the older two were already pondering for themselves.

All they did until now was wait around and be there whenever You decided to use them as punching bags. Elena was fed up with it. There had to be some way to strike back. Plus, in her head, if this You person was working alone, they would have the advantage. They were a whole group.

“Why don’t we counter-strike on social media? Since it’s this loser's playground and all. I figure that if we manage to have everyone’s support and throw this shade at them like they’ve been obviously throwing at us, You will lose it.” she said, crossing her legs on the bench. The thing was not to add more to the fire but she felt the need to make this You person realize they knew how to stand tall as a group. Elena could picture herself receiving all this negative attention alone, and if that were the case she didn’t think she would like it very much or even be that secure to repeat the process all over again.

Jin sighed. He recognized that she was right but at the same time, it would be a bold move. “What would we even say? Again, we don’t know who this person is… So we don’t know how to push their buttons.”

“How about we start at the ‘You’re behind a screen because you don’t have the balls to come say it to my face’ part?”

As Jungkook tried to hold his laughter and Yoongi pensively looked down with his arms crossed, Jin was obliged to answer Elena’s thoughts. “That seems well articulated to me.” he nodded in agreement.

“Well, good, let’s watch how this rat squirms after I turn some sides then,” She added, making a go for her mobile that had been forgotten on top of the stone table. The girl managed to unlock the device and tap on the app to start writing before Yoongi made himself heard again.

He started by saying, “I don’t think this is a good idea, Elena.” which made her stop what she was doing to look at him. “You’re going to provoke them, and then what?”

How she exhaled and gesticulated with her free hand made him know she was fed up to the point of quitting too much explanation. Jin for the first time got quiet, and Jungkook’s eyes were once again doing that thing when he got apprehensive; they would double the size. “I get it. I know what you mean by wanting to know their next move. You’re going to try and fit them into a team and track them down that way. Maybe even scare them enough to not come after us again. But it’s an unsure move. What if it gets worse? I don’t know…” Yoongi tried to reason with her before something else blew right in their faces.

“I mean. It can’t get worse than this!” she looked around and so did Yoongi. People kept gossiping and scrutinizing their every move. “We need to take action. You know that.”

And before anyone could say anything else, she finished writing it and pressed send.

There was some comfort in Elena’s post, even if no one said much more about it. She treated the situation as if all of the things they were exposed for doing were nothing but mere rumors, and there was a big relief on that. Almost as if they could resume what they have known before as normal school life.

“If you two took a bit more to arrive here I swear I would pass out of hunger.” Jin pointed out as soon as he saw Taehyung and Freya approach them, each holding two silver trays full of food.

The boys were quick to organize the table and pick their plates to start eating, failing to notice how Freya’s glance was locked with Elena’s. Taehyung almost managed to sit in the middle of the two, if it weren’t for his twin shoving him to the side.

As soon as she passed her legs through and managed to sit, she whispered in Elena’s ear, “Care to fill me in on what that post was about?”

“I’m just relieved I said something back” she confided, “We really needed a win around here.”

“You did good,” Freya agreed cheerfully. They looked at each other and realizing what she had just said, she tried to fix it, “Not you as in You but like. You.” she pointed out and Elena couldn’t help but laugh. “Oh forget it! You know what I meant.”

Out of the whole group, everyone met up during lunch, as per usual. Everyone but Namjoon and Jimin. The former had to skip it because of the captain’s duties. Psykhe’s leader had to stay longer in a monthly meeting about their team’s expenses and such.

Jimin, however, was being avoidant. Taehyung knew him well enough to know that.

He knew that as soon as he texted him saying they needed to talk, the first thing Jimin would do was this—avoid him at all costs. So excusing himself politely from the table, Taehyung went back to the cafeteria and picked some chicken wings with sauce as a peace offering, making his way to the boys’ dorms.

It was actually the perfect time for some privacy, as the majority of people were hanging on the patio for lunch and Jimin’s roommate, Hoseok, was also out.

He had to knock two times before the door was answered. Jimin opened it sporting nothing but a towel around his waist. He didn’t say much, just made way so Taehyung could come into the room.

The tallest stopped by the beds, feeling a little out of place because of his best friend’s unbothered eyes and sudden irresolvable stance. He hesitated with the box of chicken wings still in his hands. Jimin kept moving around in false pretense, entering the bathroom and then coming out of it seconds later with a smaller towel in hand, using it to boyishly dry his drenched locks.

Deciding to approach carefully, Taehyung said, “Brought you some lunch,” he slightly lifted his hand showing the white squared box that transpired a mouth-watering smell. “The canteen was about to close, so…”

Jimin gave him a small smile in return, still busy with his chore. “Thanks.”

“Alright.”

The food was placed at the closest writing table. Taehyung had to press his lips to contain his inner fuming. He turned around to face his best friend with a wave of anger he was finding quite difficult to contain.

His hands found his hips as he managed to say, “So you’re the one that gets to be mad at me? Not the other way around? I see.”

“Oh please, quit the sarcasm” Jimin spits quite impatiently himself.

“Sure. Just as soon as you cut the bullshit.” Taehyung said almost immediately demanding from his best friend what they haven’t gotten ever since the secret had been out. The courage to face the truth.

Jimin had a very different reaction from what Taehyung had envisioned for what was to come. He saw how his best friend rolled his eyes before answering, and Jimin’s voice sounded tired as he said, “Not you too.” he exhaled.

Taehyung looked at him with daggers in his eyes. His eyebrows twitched questioning, he couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “Excuse me?!” was all that he managed to blurt out.

“Go on. Spit it. I know you also have something to say.”

Still taken aback by Jimin’s reaction he scoffs. “Are you being serious?” His stance is as cold as the resentment he was feeling. His chest was about to explode due to the unfairness of the situation. The words fell short no matter what he thought of saying, and so he muted himself. The chocolate locks boy just stood there looking at his friend, feeling just as hurt.

Impatient, Jimin ran his hand through his hair. “That was why you came here with the wings! Or do you think I’m stupid?” he said, panting in anger. His normally cheerful eyes were big and glossy. “We’ve been avoiding this talk long enough so just say whatever it is that you have to say.” his chest kept rising and falling in the heat of the moment.

The boy before him had to take a second to answer. He stopped biting his tongue and all that fell from his mouth was the beginning of sarcastic laughter. Taehyung shook his head, scanning the room before meeting Jimin’s eyes again. “Yes.” He began, and the room turned to ice. “You do seem stupid after saying that.” he paused but Jimin wasn’t able to answer. A knot began forming in his throat. “And were we avoiding it?” Taehyung corrected with a pert yet sad smile, “Or were you? Because I didn’t see you coming to me to talk about it.”

Without much thinking, Jimin scoffed. “Stupid?” His words were laced with anger but his features told a different tale. “What else are you holding? C’mon, let it all out.”

There was a pause. And a strike of realization from both ends.

Taehyung exhaled. His eyebrows were knit together as his words began more paused and controlled than before. “I’m holding the fact that my best friend seems more eager to blame me than to actually understand what I really came here to do.” By the time his angry eyes meet Jimin’s, the latter feels drowned by his own guilt. “I’m not everyone else, you know…” Taehyung’s voice sounds hurtful. “I thought you knew that.”

Jimin only understands his best friend had left the room as the sound of the door being hammered echoes. The anger consumes him and in a bashful split second, he grabs the first thing that comes into hand. Hoseok’s lamp is thrown at the wall.

The din followed by scattered glass on the floor made him conscious of the mess he had just made. And that any mess could turn messier than what was thought possible.

One by one the group started to disperse. The lunch break was a very needed one, but everything good in life came to an end.

Yoongi was mindlessly scrolling his timeline in search of new song recommendations when he realized his friends had already moved on with their affairs. As he got up and grabbed his things he spotted Freya from afar. The girl was sitting by a big oak tree, basking in its welcoming shade.

He had to get closer to note she had her eyes peacefully closed. There was a slight breeze that blew softly on her locks. From where he was standing, it looked like she was in a painting.

“Not that is any of my business,” he said, plumping himself down right next to her. “But as your current fake boyfriend, I should say… Your brother sucks!” he joked, making her open a cheerful smile.

With her eyes still closed, she asked, “What did he do this time?”

“Well… He’s been hinting that he wanted to talk to me for a while now, you know–About us. But we still haven’t had the chance… All this You stuff and all.” Freya opens her eyes as she hears Yoongi sigh. “And now ever since Jimin’s thing came out he’s been all stressed.”

The girl took a glance at him. Yoongi kept his eyes on the horizon, and if she knew him well enough, his head was spinning trying to find a practical solution to this mess. Even if his semblance was calm and composed. “And he’s been taking it out on you,” Freya states.

“And he’s been taking it out on me, yeah.”

Even though the boy beside her laughed about it, she knew it was bothering him deep down. She noticed how Taehyung was sharp and borderline surly to Yoongi during lunch. Her brother could be a bit too transparent about his feelings, never knowing how to suppress them. And she had a perfect notion she was a bit too much the same.

“If it serves any consolation to you, he criticized my footwear of choice today,” she opts to say, keeping a light mood by clinking the heels of her recently acquired cowboy boots. Yoongi can’t help but laugh. Freya, as well as her brother, had always liked using questionable things when it came to fashion. And the thought of the twins having a discussion about the item can’t seem to leave his head. It felt so ridiculous that it immediately brought a smile to his face.

Freya laughed along, pleased to hear his own loud one.

Yoongi steals a glance at her as he leans his head on the trunk of the tree behind them. It’s been a while since they had been this peaceful, and he would hate to end the moment but at the same time, he felt the need to check on her. “And how have you been? On a more serious note.”

“Same old same”

“Freya.” He presses still looking at her profile. The girl sighs reluctantly and Yoongi can see the joy fading from her distant eyes.

She turns her head so she can face him and give him the answers upon his request, as she sees no way out of it, but as soon as she opens her mouth she gets interrupted. “Hey!” her eyes leave Yoongi’s face and land on Jungkook’s. “Sorry…” The boy says as Yoongi’s gaze on him feels like a rebuke. As if he had interrupted a conversation that wasn’t made for his ears. “I–Mhmm… I hope I’m not interru–”

“Hi!” Freya exclaimed with a sunny smile returned to her lips. “No, no! Sit!”

Jungkook smiled along, doing as instructed, sitting in front of the pair. He rested his backpack by his knee as he sat cross-legged. “The bell rang and I have a free period right now, so…” Freya bit a smile as he fumbled with his shoelace still convinced he had to explain himself. “Everyone went their way and then as I came back from the canteen I saw you guys here–”

“Oh fuck!” Yoongi grunts getting up. He swiftly bats the dirt from his trousers and grabs his own backpack under the gaze of the other two.

Freya chuckles in realization, “You’re late again aren’t you?”

The boy flashes her a guilty gummy smile before confessing, “Pretty much! Mrs. Hough is going to kill me… Again!” He doesn’t take any more time before starting to run downhill with a lack of youthful spirit considering his age. “And we’re not finished!” Yoongi adds with a wink as he looks back at Freya, and Jungkook can’t help but wonder. The two looked nothing like a couple. Or maybe it was just his lack of experience in the matter talking.

“So.” His eyes leave Yoongi’s back as he hears Freya say. When he looks at her he can’t help but gulp.

“So…” Jungkook repeats her words. It had been a while since they last stood alone in each other’s presence, that specific day in the Wolf’s den dawning in his conscience, even so, guilt pairing in his heart or not, he had always felt intimidated by her stare. From the beggining. And sometimes he was convinced that if he got himself locked in her eyes long enough she would be able to read him like a book. Unravel all that there is to him. Nervously he adds, “You come here often?”

Freya’s immediate reaction is to laugh. A burst of genuine laughter. There was something to his dorkiness that made her feel very comfortable. “Honestly? This is the first time I spend this free period here,” She decides to open up to his roleplay game. “I’m trying to find my new best place.”

“And what does it take to be your new best place?”

It seemed only natural to her to keep being true while looking at him. No need to even think before answering. “I’d say privacy is the first thing.” But to his insecure ears that sounded like a sign that he had crossed a line with her. “Ouch!” he lets out, finally breaking eye contact to look at the grass rubbing at his shoes instead.

Realizing he misunderstood what she had said, she comes forward nudging his shoulder playfully. “Not you though!” He analyses her features again, a tad expectant. “You can exist with me.” Her voice sounds velvety and he feels the smile tugging on the corner of his mouth once more.

With a faint of pink coloring his scarred cheek he asks, “And what’s the second requirement?” to which she answers promptly, “Mmm, I’d say a great view!”

“And then?” Jungkook asks without realizing it, almost in a whisper. She had his full attention, and his brain couldn’t stop trying to match the nooks and crannies he had already seen around the school to fit her description.

To her, much like to everyone else, the raven-haired boy before her couldn’t help but exude mysteriousness. A black translucent cloth covered him at all times from everyone’s curiosity. And it wasn’t shyness or just introspection. Freya had Yoongi to thank for being able to spot the difference. But sometimes, when the world outside seemed quiet enough–when there were just the two of them, she felt like she could glimpse the boy beneath such covers. In a trance, she mumbles just as quietly as he did before, “That’s it for now…”. They keep quiet for a moment, just enjoying each other’s features. If someone passed by them, they could easily mistake the moment for a stare competition, and the two competitors would miss the presence of the bystander just as easily.

A sudden beep causes Freya to inhale sharply and Jungkook to jolt. Both of them exchange embarrassed chuckles as the girl takes her phone out to see what had snapped them to the real world. Jungkook eyes her expectant.

She shrugs, tucking the device into her backpack once again. “It’s Yoongi.”

“So the teacher didn’t kill him this time, huh”

Freya leaned on the tree with a cheeky smile. She crossed her arms saying, “Not this time, no” as she watched how he fixed his backpack on the ground so he could rest his head comfortably on it.

More silence follows. Jungkook keeps his eyes trailed to the scenery displayed to his right. He watches mindlessly as some students cross the greenery toward the main building. From time to time, when the wind hits his face, he feels compelled to close his eyes for seconds before opening them again. Freya doesn’t look at the view as he does. She couldn’t care less about those people passing by. Instead, she keeps her eyes trailed to his nape, and she watches how the hair there is starting to get big enough so it curves softly. She spots the scar on his left cheek and thinks of how it came to be, and how it seems so fitting that it was there.

Jungkook fumbles with his lip piercing, still looking at the crowd below them. They all look so small from there. So distant. “Maybe I could help you find it,” he says as he turns his head to look at her.

He notices how her eyes were already on him. How that summer blush spread across the line of her cheeks and nose as if she had been the whole day under a scorching sun at the beach. “I would like that.”

He nods and the crinkles of his eyes start to appear. “Today after classes?”

“Deal.”

The rest of the free period is spent in comfortable silence. Both of them exist in each other’s presence, in wonder, basking in the sunlight. Enjoying the peacefulness of the breeze, and ignoring their surroundings. Caught not wanting that moment to end, but also anxiously waiting for the next encounter.

Kaya decided to accompany her brother and Namjoon to the library post lunch after receiving a notification from the system saying the literature teacher would be canceling classes that day.

The boys were supposedly in their sociology class, but the extensive course was normally divided into two hours—one for research and the other for debating. So while they came up with a grounded speech, the girl fumbled through books, settling to catch up on the subjects she would have for the rest of the day.

She was running her fingers through the numbers carved on the massive wood bookcase, eyes searching for the physics copy she needed, when she was laced by her hips and pulled to a dark corner.

“What are you doing?!” she whispered, desperately glancing around so as to not be caught.

Her captor didn’t pay much mind and kept kissing her neck. By now he was more than used to her apprehensive behavior. “My brother is right there!” she hissed again. On the tips of her toes, she tried with all her might to disentangle from the arms she loved so much. She just couldn’t be caught, and this was way too risky for her liking.

“He’s focused on the task at hand,” The boy said, laid back. “I doubt he’ll get up before cracking that book first. You know how he is.”

He pulled her closer, diving in for a kiss, sure that he had eased her mind just enough. To his misfortune, his lips were met with her hand. He tried again, playing it cool, but Kaya turned her head as she shoved him back. “Namjoon, please.”

He inhaled, as he rubbed his temples frustrated.

Namjoon had never been a pushy guy. And he had always taken Kaya’s concerns into consideration. That was why they had been dating secretly in the first place. Because to him, they would have already come clean to everyone—including Hoseok—a long time ago.

“Just tell me what you want Kaya,” he says plainly and she is taken aback.

“What do you mean?”

He sighs as the girl in front of him seems more preoccupied with checking around if anyone is listening to their conversation. More and more he felt tired of this. There was already too much on the table for them to be worried about.

Namjoon leans on the bookcase behind him, crossing his arms. “It’s been a while now since we last were together,” he says carefully and her eyes search for his. “Ever since Freya took the blame in our place, to be specific.”

“Ok…” she opts to say, as the words dissipate in her brain.

“No. It’s not ok.” he huffs annoyed. Kaya knows him too well, and the moment he clenches his jaw in a pout, swinging it back and forth, she realizes he’s been piling this up for too long. “You’re my girlfriend. Yet I can’t see you in public or in private. I can’t kiss you or touch you–We can’t even talk like this without you looking around as if you’re up to something you shouldn’t be up to!” he whispers hushedly, calling her out.

Kaya’s eyes are suddenly teary and the boy before her starts to get blurry. “But what can we do, it’s–”

“We could just be together.” his eyebrows knit almost pleading. He is certain that he loves her. And he is certain that she loves him too. What hurts the most is that it doesn’t seem enough. Not for him, or her.

Kaya starts shaking her head, eyes trailing on the wooden floor. She can’t deal with this right now. Not when her brother is mere meters away from finding the truth.

“Let’s not do this now.”

“Then when, Kaya?!” Namjoon can’t keep his cool anymore and she quickly covers his mouth to shush him. She looks apologetic at him, realizing how on edge she was being. He softly takes her hand out of the way. “I know these past couple of days have left us all walking on eggshells,” his voice sounds temperate again, the tone only loud enough for her to hear. “But I also think we can’t stop living our lives because of it.”

She closed her eyes with a sigh. Kaya knew Namjoon was more than right. She just needed her scale to pend to the other side instead. Right now, she still has a lot to lose. “I know, it’s just–”

The sound of a book dropping way closer to them than they thought possible, made both of their heads snap toward it, alarmed. Kaya’s breathing increased considerably and she froze on the spot. Namjoon looked around, and not seeing anyone in sight, he went toward the next row of bookcases.

There was a single book left on the ground, scrambled from the falling. He looked at the cover as he picked it up, but the title didn’t say much to him. Before returning it to its place, he looked around once more. Kaya came from behind, quite apprehensive. Looking at her eyes, he followed her frightful gaze. On the other end of the long corridor of books, sat at a table for four there was Momo, Mark, and Tzuyu. The latter, unlike her Sarx companions, wasn’t writing or reading. She had her eyes craved on Namjoon.

The Psykhe’s captain decided not to look too much, or read too much into the situation. He had to avoid looking suspicious. Recomposing himself, he put the book on the shelf once again and turned his back to Tzuyu’s prying eyes.

“Let’s go back–”

“She’s still looking,” Kaya whispered with concern. And before he could say anything else, she made rushed decisions for the both of them, “We’re stopping this for now. We can talk later.”

As she turned the corner leaving him no space for refutation, Namjoon couldn’t figure out if they were stopping the conversation or their relationship altogether. He had to swallow his frustration as he was well aware his back was still being stared at.

And who knew who else was paying close attention too…

Summer still lingered in the air as the students from class 104 dozed off to the sound of Mr. Perry’s soothing voice and the ceiling fans. Philosophy felt like a drag whenever the class was theoretical instead of practical.

Elena sat in the last row of desks, sharing one of them with an absent-minded Jungkook. She took notes from time to time just to keep herself busy and although throughout the first part of the class, she thought the boy beside her was doing the same, it became pretty clear that was not the case as she peeked to the side and saw a view from what she pegged being the Psykhe’s tower drawn on his notebook.

She whispered so only he could hear, “That looks amazing”, and he took his while perfecting the twinkling stars on his pitch-black sky before answering with a brief chuckle, “I try”.

The class continued irrespective of Elena’s admiration and Jungkook’s pencil lining. The room was a stage for a lazy symphony composed by Mr. Perry’s throat being cleared here and then and some bored sighs at the end. The time of the class helped the preposition to be lulled instead of trying to create a ruckus with chitchatting.

But then a notification sound reverberated alongside the teacher’s voice. Some heads, from owners that still had some stamina left, turned to the guilty one holding the phone. Elena’s included. The student apologized sheepishly doting a sheer of red on his face while turning off the device as if it had been a coincidental mistake. Mr. Perry was about to restart his explanation with an unbothered stance when the girl sat by Belle’s side, right at the front row seats, exclaimed reproachfully with her phone at hand.

Some students exchanged glances, and others paused what they were doing to look at her expectantly. “What is it, Vanessa?” someone asked from the back. The teacher tried to pay no mind going instead to write on the imponent board behind him.

Suddenly both Vanessa and Belle turn around and stare in Elena’s direction with pitiful eyes. The girl is taken aback by the gesture but tries to deflect them by looking back with a shrug.

“Holy shit…” one of the boys let out while scrolling his phone. Elena looks at him apprehensively, and Jungkook finally lifts his head peaking above the shoulder of his table mate to grasp the situation. While the constant noise of chalk being dragged on the board serves as background, the class starts to get restless. Phones are being pulled out of pockets to kill the famish curiosity pairing in the air. Elbows jerk and eyes turn inquiring toward her.

Elena panics and suddenly she knows. It’s You… Again.

She doesn’t take the time to check. Jolting out of her seat she grabs her purse and rushes toward the door, exiting it with a minor bang.

“Elena, wait up!” Jungkook has to sprint to catch up to the girl, ignoring the teacher’s warnings. The strap of his backpack hangs loosely from his right shoulder. “What happened?”

She faces him with teary eyes, lips in a pout, as she manages to say through a sob, “I’m fucked.”

The boy frowns. Not knowing what had caused her to be in such a state makes Jungkook panic a little. He had been a victim of Elena’s emotional side more than once but he was never alone to calm her down. “Let’s just take a deep breath.” He sounds more shaken than confident in the solution he was able to find.

The girl dismisses his words as she keeps on cursing under her breath, phone up to her ear. Jungkook keeps on hearing the faint recording of the call being directed to the voicemail.

“Should we go outside? Catch some fresh air?” Jungkook attempts again, this time even more uncertain.

The girl doesn’t give him an answer, instead hastening her pace towards the courtyard. Her focus is still on her device and through the corner of his eye, Jungkook can make out the messages app open as she types feverishly into a group called The Runaways. Jungkook recognized the photos of the other two members of the group–Freya and Kaya.

Taehyung had been the kind soul to explain the name to Jungkook once he heard Jin referring to the girls like that. His facial expression must have shown how confused he was by the nickname and so his peculiar roommate explained that the trio had tried to escape from Horus Academy one night during their first year there and got caught–of course. Kaya was a mess because of the two weeks of detention and Hoseok even added that she had palpitations from having to visit the dean’s office so soon after her arrival at the school.

The group was close, regardless of all of them being so different. And to Jungkook that was something that was sometimes revealed to be difficult to comprehend. They were good people, that he was sure. Despite all their quirks and inevitable penchant for secrets. No wonder he had fit so well.

“Was it You?” Jungkook finally dares to speak. They had already reached the courtyard and Elena had sat down at one of the picnic-style tables scattered around the place, her feet tapping on the bench rhythmically. The girl nods in response and Jungkook’s curiosity gets the best of him, “What did they say?”

Sighing, Elena shows the phone to the boy and the way he frowns as his eyes scan the text on the screen makes her realize that she’s in for a hell of a couple of days.

“Is–is it true?” Jungkook asks hesitantly. The second the words come out of his mouth he regrets it. His stomach is in a twirl and he would rather not know the truth.

“Of course, it is. Whoever that psycho is, they are deep into our lives and know all about our darkest secrets.” Elena speaks angrily. Jungkook’s question doesn’t bother her. He has been with the group for a while now and she trusts him. He has been loyal to them despite all the attacks they have been under since day one. Had she been in his shoes, she doesn’t know if she would stick with such a problematic crew. She always wondered why he stuck with them in the first place, and she had gotten close to asking him about it a few times, but Kaya cut it off after all her attempts, advising her to ‘not be rude and ask’.

“Yoongi was right–” Jungkook flops down next to Elena, finding a seat on the picnic table. His tone isn’t accusatory, like a parent reprimanding a child, but mostly hopeless. “We shouldn’t be poking the bear,” he looks her in the eye, seriously. “it’s going to poke back.”

Scoffing, Elena gets back up on her feet, hands finding a firm grip on her hips. “Of course, we should! We all got secrets, Kook, I know–” She glares at the boy, huffing as yet another tear rolls down her cheek, “We want them buried but I’m not going to sit here and let it hold such power over my life.”

“But–”

“This person is insane. What if they start blackmailing us? Pinning us against each other?” Jungkook shifts in his seat but the action passes unseen by the revolted girl. “Are you going to sit by and watch the house burn down?”

Eyes stuck to the floor, Jungkook finds comfort in analyzing his fingers. Elena’s words are marked on his brain as if she kept on asking the question over and over again. Pressing his lips together, he doesn’t manage to look her in the eye as he reaches the final verdict, “I–I don’t know Elena.”

“I know Yoongi was right. But fuck this.” Elena’s focus is back on her phone. “Jesus Christ why is no one picking up their phones!”

Relieved by the change of subject, Jungkook tries to uncover more of the newest secret You had revealed, “Are you trying to call your mom?”

“Heavens no. If she got word that we were being harassed she’d come down to the school and take me out of it. I would never see you guys again.” Elena laughs drily. “What about yours?”

Jungkook tilts his head, confused by the question. “What?”

“What would your parents do if they knew you were strapped to a tree for an entire night?” Jungkook hadn’t been a target of You yet–at least not directly–and so far, the Sarx folks were the most fitting candidates for the shoes of psycho.

Jungkook’s eyes are big as Elena sits down on the bench next to him. In an attempt to diverge from her stare, he takes out his notebook from his backpack. “You know–the same.”

Glancing at the girl lets him know she was analyzing his not-so-confident answer. “Do you want to see more?” Jungkook is quick to ask as he lands on the page he had earlier been drawing on. The Kardia girl’s eyes light up as her lips turn into a smile, pleased to have a distraction, “Yes, please.”

Word around Horus always traveled fast. But nothing could quite compare to bad news. With cell phones prohibited in class, it was astonishing how people had already begun whispering in the hallways about the latest rumor of the all-star group attending the boarding school.

The first period of the afternoon had barely ended when the courtyard where Elena and Jungkook were, began to fill quickly. The raven-haired boy was quick to find a distraction for the girl that made herself heedless of the preying eyes in an almost impeccable way.

“Damn…” The hand that rested on Elena’s shoulder had been what startled her but Jungkook was only aware of Jin’s presence when he made his voice heard. The Dianoia member was facing the opposite direction of the other two, back leaning against the table as he took a sip from his soda can.

Jungkook swiftly shifts on his seat, his legs standing on each side of the bench. He can now see Elena and Jin perfectly.

“Not that I thought you a straight record, but when you pulled a Regina George today on that psycho, I at least thought you were secret safe,” The expression on the oldest face says how incredulous yet disconcerted he is with the situation. He was in a complete mix of feelings.

“Excuse me?!” Jungkook notices how Elena’s eyebrows furrow and how her once relaxed demeanor is quick to leave her body.

“Don’t worry, I won’t say I told you so!” Jin reassures, lips wet from the last sip he took from his soda. He scootches closer toward Elena, casually crossing his legs while he still stands. “That will be Yoongi.”

“Oh, fuck off Jin.” The girl in turn stands up from the bench, now leaving an empty spot between the two boys. Her phone is quickly retrieved from her pocket and placed on her ear once more.

“You kinda did, though,” Jungkook whispers to Jin, lips pressed. “You kind of said it.”

Jin widens his eyes, distant, not really focusing anywhere. He then takes a last sip from the can in his hands, before spurring in Jungkook’s direction unable to suppress a nervous laughter.

“Who are you trying to reach?” The doe-eyed boy opts to ask Elena instead. She had been nervously pacing back and forth. Her thumb rests between her lips the whole time as she nibbles on its skin. “Maybe I can help?” He offers again.

The proposal sounds weak despite his best intentions, and as a consequence, he ends up being ignored by the other two.

In the distance, as he looks over to distract himself from the situation, Jungkook can make out a duo that skids through the increasing crowd. Taehyung and Jimin spurt toward their table, the latter’s hand already in the air, signaling his presence to the group.

“Hey, you okay?” Taehyung reaches the girl first, hands finding her shoulders as he looks her down, almost as if examining her physically. “Is it real?” He questions as his hands slide toward her neck and his thumbs gently force her chin up so he can scan her eyes.

“Of course it’s real.” The Kardia boy spats, passing by on his way to the vacant spot between Jungkook and Jin before Elena had a chance to answer. Taehyung sent a death stare to his back, biting on his tongue so as to not make the situation worse. The tension between the two best friends was so palpable even their algebra teacher had noticed that the pair was odd—as they used to spend the class playing games in each other’s notebooks or talking, now they avoided eye contact. It was impossible to deny that there was some unresolved business between the two.

“Jimin–” Elena is taken off by the sudden attack of her best friend but before she can continue, Taehyung cuts her off, unable to look past Jimin’s pretentious eyes as he sat down and stared back.

“Just because you tend to make shitty decisions it doesn’t mean everyone else follows the example so stop being–”.

“It’s not that ludicrous. It happened to me, too.” Jimin shrugs and Jin scoffs at the sudden outburst, somewhat entertained.

“Ludicrous? Huh,” He laughs. “Aren’t you a committed student...” Taehyung is quick to bark back.

Jimin’s eyes are filled with fire, but he decides that ignoring his best friend is a better response. "Why would you even do that?" He directs his words at Elena instead. "What dumb thought crossed your mind that made you think that it would be a good idea to go after You after what happened to me?"

"Dumb thought?! Was I supposed to just sit and watch this shit show?!" Hands anchored on her hips, Elena's focus is no longer on her phone.

Jimin laughs incredulously as he shakes his head and looks at the crowd. People kept staring at them, waiting for more drama to unfold. "Are you happy now that everyone is giving you the side eye?"

"You certainly seem to be." Elena pokes at his chest, index finger waving in accusation.

"Me?! I didn't even know you were going to do this. Let alone that you had this secret.” Jimin looks at her with accusatory eyes, and differently from Jin, Jungkook can’t help but think he should do something to stop the arguing. “Good job at being a best friend, by the way! If every best friend kept a secret like you we would all stand equally as strangers!”

“You-!” Elena lifted her finger once more but was gently pulled back by the boy behind her. Taehyung couldn’t care less if people were beginning to stop their own conversations to eavesdrop on theirs.

"Like you told me about yours?! Or any of us, for a matter of fact?" He is quick to jump back into the discussion.

"This isn't about me." Jimin stands his ground, clearly upset.

“Do you know where Namjoon is?” Jin shifts on his seat, his arm resting on the table as he supports his head in the palm of his hand, eyeing Jungkook directly. He seems too comfortable with the ruckus happening not even two feet from them. The youngest doesn’t even get a chance to answer before Jin continues in a tired voice, “We need Namjoon to make them hold hands again.”

“Hold… hands?” Jungkook furrows his eyebrows. The concern he once felt completely dissipates, leaving space for confusion instead.

“I’ll tell you later.” Jin nods his head, reassuringly. “It’s just that Namjoon made them hold hands another time. When they fought, you know.”

“Oh, God!” Elena raises her voice, gaining the attention of the two whisperers and the other two bickerers. “Where is Kaya!”

“She shouldn’t take too long,” An out-of-breath Namjoon takes a seat where Jimin has previously sat by the picnic table. “I lost her and Hoseok in the crowd.”

“We have a dumpling situation again,” Jin comments, pointing at the two boys standing. “Make them hold hands, for the love of God, I can’t hear them anymore!” He complains nonchalantly. “Lucky me I don’t have a mirror otherwise I’d see for myself I aged ten years while I sat here listening to this crap.” The Psykhe’s leader can't help the chuckle that escapes his lips as Jin rambles as fast as a bullet. "First things first, what happened?" He exhales as he asks the group, now recomposed.

"Elena bossed up and went after the psycho and now the psycho went after her, but much more effectively." Jimin explains, and the girl in question glares at him.

Jungkook can’t help but rub his eyes frustrated. His right leg embraced a frenetic rhythm afraid the bickering would restart. “Not again…” He mumbles to himself.

Namjoon nods silently, glancing around to assert the gravity of the rumors. In his peripheral vision, he sees Elena ignoring Jimin, preferring to show attention to her cell phone instead. Taehyung looked at him expectantly but he was just as lost. He just couldn’t show it to his peers. Perhaps by being a leader he had picked up the habit, but something in his being told him it had to do with all those eyes prying at them instead. "It does nothing for us to be going at each other's throats…" Namjoon reasons with them, his voice low enough so only his friends could hear. He preferred to wait for the rest of the group to arrive before discussing their situation. He also prayed Yoongi or Hoseok would bring with them some sort of solution. Or at least help to calm the other’s down.

"Freya, where the hell are you?" Elena asks, visibly relieved when her call goes through. The boys all look at her awaiting the answer to her question. As she huffs and looks at some point past the courtyard, listening to what Freya was saying, she feels the urge to interrupt with a plea. “Run faster then,” she says, “I can see her already and she is ready to kill me. I just know, alright? Just run… Ha-! Well, because you don’t sound like running to me!”

The second Elena clicked on the red button to end the call, she realized Kaya had shortened the distance between them way too fast. Faster than she imagined, even if she was well aware her roommate was fuming. Hoseok stopped right behind his sister, panting from trying to helplessly keep up with her pace.

Namjoon got up from his seat instinctively, worried that neither Taehyung nor Jimin, who were standing by, could do something to stop the wrath of his girlfriend. “I just can’t believe you!” Kaya exclaimed. “Wasn’t it enough seeing Freya, Yoongi, and Jimin being targeted?! Why would you do something so reckless, Lena? For heaven's sake!”

Elena sighs, fingers massaging her temples as she turns her back on her roommate. “Not you, too.” she says, and both Jimin and Taehyung are struck by déjà vu.

“No, no, no! Don’t turn your back on me.” Kaya speaks through gritted teeth. “Don’t you even think that you will get away with this.”

The shortest one doesn’t hide her arched eyebrow as she turns around. “Last time I checked you weren’t my mom, Kaya,” she says decisively. It takes a good minute for her roommate to process her spiteful answer, and a longer one for the silence that broke amongst their peers who watched the exchange like statues.

“Just stop.” Hoseok cuts sharp as a knife. “It’s not the time to fight about who’s at fault here.” He glares at the both of them and as Elena mentions to speak up he continues, “I don’t care. I just want to know who the hell is behind this. Who could have this kind of information–All the freaking time!”

Namjoon feels the need to intervene as he looks around and all of them, besides Hoseok who had a desperate demeanor to his face, had their eyes trailed to the floor, hopeless. In a space between the harsh revelation of both secrets, they had gathered no information about their stalker or even a thread of where to start looking. They were completely in the dark. “Let’s wait for Freya and Yoongi–Who are just much part of this as Kaya has said. And then we can all sit together and make a timeline of events. We’re gonna find something–“ The leader tries.

For brief seconds Jungkook remembers how to breathe again, certain that this time Namjoon’s approach had worked out. It was visible how everyone collected themselves, pondering his words. He was right, after all, there was no point in arguing without everyone present. They would be just circling back and forth, wasting the little time they seemed to have. Even Jungkook, who was never the most patient one, could understand that.

Students begin passing by them quicker, seeing there was seemingly no secret conversation to overhear. To them, the all-star group looked like showcase dolls being exhibited in the courtyard.

“What did I say?” their heads move together as they hear Yoongi’s familiar voice. He circled the table with his arms crossed, making Jin scooch closer to Jungkook so he can sit on the bench as well. “I told you exactly how this would go down, didn’t I?” he says, looking disappointed but not at all surprised at Elena.

And it is enough, just like a snowflake is to trigger an avalanche.

“I will say it slow enough for you all to grasp it–Fuck. You.” Elena bursts. “It’s my secret.” she points to her chest with a wave of moved anger. “My choice.”

“Elena–”

The strawberry blonde one couldn’t find in herself the patience to listen to any of them anymore. The shock of the situation finally untied her naturally proactive self. “No!” she exclaims back. “I won’t shut up about it! Whoever this creep is, they deserve someone barking back.”

“HEY, hey!” Freya comes like a tornado. It’s clear that the girl had been running to get there as the sunglasses that are almost always securing her hair back is crooked to the left. Her locks are tousled. “Finally!” Namjoon gasps.

Freya places a hand on Elena’s shoulder as she comes closer, and it works like magic. The shortest one’s uproar quickly ceased. “Before we mess this up,” her voice is steady despite her rush, and commanding enough to make them all pay attention. “Let’s move this circus to a more private tent, alright.” Her over-expressive eyes pointed at the crowd beginning to surround them again. Some cell phones were being aimed like guns at them, ready to shoot and record the perfect evidence.

Kaya, different from the rest of the group who tried to discreetly look around, was too possessed to notice anything but what was happening between them. “Heavens! Stop trying to make us forget what this is all about!”

“I’m not the one that stops things from happening, Kaya. You got me confused.” Freya adverts. “Just get out of your head for a second and look around.” her eyebrows do the work this time as they shoot up. And for the Dianoian girl’s terror, she was the center of attention.

"Freya is right," Yoongi speaks tiredly. Not that he was bothered by the ridiculously noticeable glares of the other students. He had been used to being the freak everyone stared, pointed, and laughed at. But this You person had really started to get on his nerves by assuming they could get rid of them as easily as possible.

"Do you remember the spot of the last trial of the games?" Namjoon is already pulling the strap of his bag over his head as he speaks. He walks around the table, arm swinging around Hoseok's shoulder as he pushes him out of his ecstatic state and forces his feet to levitate from the ground. "Let's meet there in 10. All of us."

Namjoon leaves with Hoseok. Being the captain of Psykhe had thought him a thing or two as the whole group—even the ones that were from different houses—respected his words.

A stare-down happens between the two roommates, now not-so-seemingly best friends, and Freya stays right in the middle of them. The boys on the table don't dare to move. Until Elena lets out a dry chuckle, eyes rolling as she makes her way to the table to fetch her bag. "Will be seeing you all in… 8 minutes." Her sarcastic smile is directed at Yoongi, who sighs in response as he too gets up to go and try to get rid of the people who could possibly trail them.

"You better go somewhere else." Taehyung coldly speaks to Jimin before skipping after the Kardia girl that was about to quickly get lost in the crowd.

"What did I do?!" Jimin whines as he's about to be left alone by the table as Kaya storms by herself, and Jin seems to make his way to enter the main building again. "Jin–wait for me!"

Satisfied that everyone listened to Namjoon, making the rest of the students confused as to who they should follow, Freya pulls Jungkook by the hand toward the stadium. She wasn’t a fan of crowds. Passing by all those that were surrounding the courtyard—even if Horus Academy didn’t have that many students to begin with—felt like a nightmare. The grand stadium seemed the right choice as the structure was placed on the other side, they just had to cut through a grass path and some isolated trees.

Not a soul seemed to follow the two. Jungkook made sure to look back every time he heard a different noise that wasn’t his own feet clashing with the dirt ground or Freya’s. And as some distance was already put between them and the unpleasant moment they had just experienced, Jungkook cleared his throat. For the first time, he was bothered by Freya’s silence amidst this chaos. “This, uhm… It wasn’t what I had in mind when we said we’d be meeting each other after classes…”

The girl doesn’t slow her pacing, and neither does he, as they are still locking hands. “That’s because technically we’re still in classes. So this ain’t it.” She shrugs with a rapid smile.

Jungkook chuckles and keeps his eyes on the back of her head. She wasn’t being her carefree self, he could notice. He wondered while she lead him astray from the path to the stadium and down a small ravine through the woods if she seemed distant only due to her best friend being targeted. Again, her relationship with Yoongi crossed his mind. It seemed odd that he was the one holding hands with her and not her boyfriend.

He wondered if he was crossing a line. “Why isn’t Yoongi here?” he decided to give it a shot.

“What do you mean?” The girl seems more preoccupied to point to him where he can’t step in order not to fall than not falling herself. He holds her hand tighter as she slips once before replying, “It’s just that he went alone. And you’re here–with me.”

Freya’s eyes travel from the ground to his face and she halts her steps. They are right at the base of the ravine and the only thing they can hear is the whisper of the trees dancing in the wind. Jungkook nibbles on his lips as she eyes him without an answer. Suddenly his questioning seems rubbish to himself, his actions quite inappropriate and selfish, and the girl in front of him a dream within a dream.

She opens her mouth to reply with a prepared lie, but nothing comes out of it. Not even an excuse for him not knowing well the paths around school, or looking seemingly lost back at the courtyard. Would it be so bad to tell him the truth?, she thinks to herself. His fingers laced on hers seems the answer and the fire that ignites her bold decision. “Yoongi and I, we–”

Beep.

Their phones going off at the same time is enough to cut her sentence short. Their hands fall from each other as they grab the devices instead.

Jungkook’s eyes leave the screen first to check on the girl in front of him. She zooms in and out of the picture posted to check its veracity. As she glances up to see him, Freya is nothing but decided. Hints of anger flash in her irises. “We’re almost there. Are you up for a sprint?” she asks and he nods promptly. “Be careful with branches. They’re bitches for ankles–trust me.”

They run, succeeding in avoiding smaller rocks and the tree branches the girl advised him about. Both had been here before for the games, but this felt more urgent. More secretive. And by the nature of You’s recent posting, much more treacherous.

"I can't believe you." It’s the first thing they hear as they arrive panting. Everyone is already there, which confirms to Jungkook they had been the ones taking the longer route. Yoongi drops his bag on the floor. He's fuming. "I can't fucking believe you, Elena."

"Oh, and here he goes again." Elena mimics his actions, bag, and jacket dropping right by her feet as she places her hands on her hips. "Here comes Yoongi, on his high horse."

The boy in question chuckles. He rubs his forehead as he sighs, looking up at the treetops swinging, trying to choose wisely his next words. He didn’t want to start a fight, far from that. He knew their real enemy was clearly You, and whatever he did, he for sure wasn’t going to be compliant by serving exactly what that deranged wanted—them all fighting each other. "Just–What are you trying to do? I want to understand because it seems simple to me that this person isn’t one to be messed with" They now stand close to each other and both Taehyung and Jungkook feel the need to take a step forward.

"I told you–I'm not going to stand down." Elena simply shrugs. "We've been friends for how long now, Yoongi? …Is it really too much to ask you to back me up on this?"

It’s clear to them all how Yoongi ponders as he looks her in the eyes. "You're being selfish." Kaya spits. "You're just thinking about what you want."

Elena turns to her roommate with a scoff, "And you're not?"

"How am I selfish?!"

The look Elena gives her says enough to have both Namjoon and Freya on their toes. "Kaya…" The boy threads lightly. He has to stop himself, the craving of holding his girlfriend's hand driving him mad.

Jimin however is the one that moves, but away. He shakes his head as he goes to sit on a stem, looking defeated as he leans his forehead on his arms. Hoseok catches a glance at his roommate’s lack of spirit, deciding to intervene for him. "El, please. We've just been to hell and back with Jimin." He says harshly, as he leans against a tree with arms crossed. It was a rare sight to see Hoseok like that, and if the circumstances were other, the discussion would have ended with his word. But not everyone standing in that glade wanted to be picked at, and some had less to lose.

"She's not wrong…" Freya points out, unafraid to be looked upon by Hoseok’s hard judgment.

"Thank you!" Elena throws her hands up in the air, exasperated. Freya glares at her, clearly not finished with her point. Before some of them can revolt, she adds, "Lena is being reckless and she does need to calm down, but she did prove something."

"Oh, c'mon Freya, don't encourage this." Yoongi complains and Jin feels the need to add, “People, this isn’t Law and Order for you to be proving stuff!”

Freya unlike the others wasn’t carrying a backpack, but she did take her glasses off her head, dropping them on top of a pile of things that rested next to a tree trunk. Her hair fell in the process to frame her face. “Listen–” she began, hands coming to her sides to put them all at ease. "You posted real proof. They had the evidence ready to go. Just like that." She snaps her fingers to add to her case, “This seems somewhat already thought through, no? Or at least it has to be someone that is able to get this kind of thing–Documents and shit.”

Hoseok looked at Namjoon to confirm if he had to be worried or not, depending if the leader had bought the argument. The engines on his head worked speedily. "And that only makes everything worse," Jungkook says, breaking his silence.

"How so?" Namjoon is intrigued by the sudden intervention, and he is not the only one. Taehyung stares intently at their group’s novice expectant to finally hear his reasoning. Even Jimin looks up.

"For starters this person is insane,” Jungkook states blankly. He wasn’t used to reasoning things out loud, but all eyes were on him, pushing him to speak further. “They have already proved this to us… With Freya, Jimin… Yoongi’s thing that day at the games as well… And now this Elena thing–And honestly, it's bothering me how normally you're all treating this situation–"

"Normally?"

There is some confusion pairing in the air, some eyes trailed to the floor reflexive over the last weeks. But the novice tries to avoid those so as to not lose himself in his own argument. "How are you not afraid, El?" Jungkook's eyes widen as he looks at her instead. She doesn’t answer as her point of view differed tremendously, and he tilts his head unable to comprehend the coolness they exuded faced with such things. "I don't know about you guys but I never had something like this happening to me. I was tied to a tree by a bunch of psychos–who still study here by the way, and Tzuyu is even Freya’s roommate–And you guys keep on getting threats…? They found out about Jimin being with a teacher and–no offense, man–but the logic of this person is to share it online to intimidate us and here we are, making secret reunions in the middle of the woods."

Jin is the one to cut the silence by laughing nervously, "When you put it that way…" he adds, “No wonder we are being targeted.”

Jungkook’s eyes are still unable to search for anyone else’s as he adds. "I just think we shouldn't worry about figuring out who this person is or what they want. I think we just need to know how to get them the fuck away from us." His voice sounds defeated as his focus shifts to a rock poking on the ground. He leans his body forward and kicks it.

"One thing very much so implies the other, I'm sorry to be the bearer of bad news." Elena points out, and as soon as she does Taehyung gives her a reproachful look. She mouths him a questioning ‘what?’ in silence, as he shakes his head.

Freya doesn’t listen to the comment, however, as her feet work just as intently as her head by drawing patterns on the grass as she paces around. "It can't just be anyone…” she says, deep in thought, more to herself than the others. “It's someone smart, clearly… And they have a motive."

"Stop it, you two!” Kaya’s outburst makes her brother jolt surprised, leaning further away onto the tree to shore himself. “For heaven's sake, just stop!" she begs, frustrated. Jin is quicker than Namjoon to side-hug her, and the Psykhe’s leader inhales relieved as he sees Kaya burying her face onto Jin’s shoulder, returning the hug. “This is getting out of line.” Hoseok comments fed up. “Look at what they’re doing to us!” he gestures emphasizing their defeated postures.

"You're the ones allowing it." Elena shoots, crossing her arms.

Kaya turns into Jin’s embrace in a flash upon hearing her words. "What is your problem, Elena?!" she mentions to walk toward her roommate but Jin wraps one arm over her shoulder line, pinning her in place. Still, she points an accusatory finger at the Kardia girl. "You're going to end up putting everyone in the front line with how you’re handling this."

"It was one thing to play the rumor card at lunch but now…" Yoongi commented resigned as he closed his eyes. He too crossed his arms, and to the ones watching, he looked like basking in the sunlight that poured through the clearing as his face was tilted up. He opens his eyes and looks at the shortest girl before adding, "You just proved that everything they post is real. You showed that they are a credible source. You know that, right?"

"So what?” Taehyung questions. “Just because they have proof of Elena's doesn't mean the rest is true." he shrugs in discontent. "And besides, she hasn't implicated anyone but herself."

There is a sense of veracity in what he says, or better, how he says it, and the group goes calmer as they let his words sink in. Jimin is the only one that shows unconformity as he stands up with a scold plastered on his face. "Funny how when it's her, it doesn't matter, but then when it was my secret or Freya’s it was that big of a deal.”

Taehyung dismisses his remark with a simple side eye, and a scoff is heard before Elena adopts a sarcastic smile to her features "Are you seriously comparing being in a fucking deranged relationship to getting in an accident?"

“Okay let’s–” Namjoon tries.

"It wasn't just an accident. You were driving drunk, Elena." Kaya insists, untangling herself from Jin’s arm and retrieving her phone to showcase You’s report. "And according to this, I'm pretty sure your next stop was a stomach wash at the hospital."

"Are you serious?!" the hurt in Elena’s voice is able to be sensed a mile away.

"Am I wrong?"

The group has a second of stillness as no one can think of a better thing to say, or even how to proceed from there on. Freya looks from one girl to another, fearing they were stranding too far for a possible rescue. She can tell how frustrated and fearful Kaya is being, but she can also see how profound the embarrassment in Elena’s eyes is as she shifts her stares through the group. “You know what?” the strawberry blonde adds, “Fuck you, Kaya.”

"Am. I. Wrong?" Kaya keeps pushing with a clouded mind and the tallest of the three finally shouts a reprehensive ‘Hey!’ so as to break their flare.

With drained faces, they all seemed a little out of orbit. The group has had its fair share of disagreements before, that picnic table in the courtyard of Horus knew how many spiteful arguments Taehyung and Jimin shared. The halls of the school were tainted with bickering. But it never felt like they were standing with a cliff between them before. And the fall, Namjoon feared if he didn’t stop it, would be too decisive.

"That's more than enough." The leader spoke with bravado. "We came here to try and figure a solution out. This was not to go at each other’s throats!"

"No–Absolutely not. I’m not wasting time with this anymore.” Elena shakes her head, fed up. “I've had enough of your bullshit." She eyes Kaya as she speaks. "Always running around like you're Miss Perfect. I'm tired of this–I'm tired of you."

She walks toward the pile stacked by a tree, picking up her bag, resolute to walk away as Kaya replies. "If I’m the Miss Perfect for thinking of others before doing reckless things–Fine! Be it! I will rather be labeled as that than be labeled as a freaking selfish bitch."

Elena ties the sleeves of her jacket around her waist as she angrily rebuts, "Oh, don't you fucking worry, Kaya–your stupid little secret is safe!"

The shock on Kaya’s face is tremendous as she gulps down her anger faced with the threat. Both Freya and Jin feel the need to barricade whatever reaction she was about to have, as he places a hand on her shoulder and the girl grips at her arm. On the other end, Yoongi is about to stop Elena from leaving, as he is still firm about coming to a conclusion for this unexpected and needed reunion when they all hear the snap of a branch nearby.

No one says a word, as heads perk toward the sound and all pairs of eyes are busy scanning the foliage.

“There’s no way… Right?” Jungkook questions almost in a whisper and a chill runs through their spines. More silence follows, no one dares to say a word. And although no one is able to indeed spot someone in the woods, watching them, they know in their hearts—You was somehow there. “MhmHm.” Hoseok shakes his head, picking up his backpack. “I’m done here,” he adds, as he starts to make his way to leave, pulling Jimin alongside him and signaling Kaya to follow. Elena’s last statment about his sister awakening a paranoid distrust in the pit of his stomach.

In a matter of seconds, the group is scattered. They leave in pairs, trios, and some even wander alone, but none is able to shake the awful sensation of still being followed.

“I thought I might find you here…” Namjoon says as he approaches Kaya carefully. She had been skittish lately, especially with him, and much to his misfortune, the Psykhe’s captain couldn’t blame her even if he wanted to. Deep down he knew her reasons, even after their rocky encounter at the library. “I think–”

“Listen,” she interrupts him. Kaya fixes her position by the feet of the giant Gaia statue so she could stare at her boyfriend’s eyes properly. She had discovered that statue by chance due to venturing inside the maze, only a few students knew existed, in the gardens of the imponent boarding school. Lately, the girl felt perhaps, aside from her girlfriends, only she and Namjoon knew of its existence. “I know what you’re going to say. And I love you for caring but I really don’t need a lesson right now.”

The boy before her lows his eyes to the colorful crystal-clear pebbles adorning the floor, and opens a smile as he tucks his hands into his pockets and kicks softly one of the tiny rocks. “Seems I can still surprise you after all,” he says and looks up to see her reaction. “I actually came to say I get how you feel.”

As she looks suspiciously at him, he shrugs. “I get that just like me you know nothing about this ‘you’ persona and that all of us are scared.” he continued. “And I also get that you have a lot to lose in case your secret–Our secret comes out, and that is frightening.”

Kaya looks at her own hands, curled in her lap while weighing his words. He then takes the opportunity to take a few more steps toward her. “Not knowing what could be thrown at us is scary and I would definitely take a more…” he stops to think of the proper choice of word. “Cautious approach. But that is my style, my personality faced with danger. So is yours.”

Their eyes meet again and she takes force in his argument to let her anger out. “Exactly! So why–” Namjoon places a hand on her thigh, coming a little closer.

“That doesn’t mean everyone will behave identically when confronted with the same situation… I get you, and I get myself for thinking the way we think, but I also get Elena.”

Kaya scoffs, her anger still not subdued. She crosses her arms as she says “So much for saying you weren’t giving me a lecture.” and all Namjoon can do is laugh as he wraps his arms around her frame.

“And I’m not! I was just saying I get everyone for having the reactions they’re having at the moment. Was it a bit imprudent of Elena to go at that psycho? Yeah, a bit… But I get her. Some people run, some people hide, others much rather grab the bull by its horns.” he says and she gently leans her forehead on his chest. “Besides, we do need to take action. That thing in the clearing…? It happened at the library with us.”

As the girl inhales deeply, with her eyes closed, Namjoon caresses her hair with a soft touch he only knew how to invoke for her. In this sense of security, Kaya is brave and steady enough to uncross her arms and place them around his waist. She pulls him closer, compensating for all the time they stayed out of each other’s reach. “You’re like a very much-needed cup of tea,” she says diverging subjects and looking up at him. Her chin is now the one being pressed against his chest.

“Out of all things, a cup of tea?!”

The smile reaches her eyes as he exclaims indignantly. “It’s the only other thing besides you that manages to calm me down.” she says.

His eyebrows waver and she sees how he is pondering her statement. It’s in moments like this that she finds Namjoon precious. She knows he will find the beauty in her phrase and intent, and because of that, this moment will be significant forever. He will make sure of it, as he had done countless times before by sneaking little poems he had written himself inside her books.

“If that is the case… Alright. I’m good with being a cup of tea.” He muses, showing off his dimple. “Healing properties, right?”

“Tons!” she says, grabbing him by the collar of his tee and locking him in a kiss.

Freya liked the transition from afternoons to evenings the best. There was something calming about how the sun would set every day just as she would. With a big breath of hers, it was already hidden away again, all of the stress that burned her shoulders gone within those bright and scorching oranges against the deep sea of blue. At least until tomorrow came.

The Psykhe tower was the best place to watch it happening, but ever since she found out about the shocking truth of someone stalking her from there, she hadn’t felt comfortable hanging in her old spot. And because of that, she found herself taking a stroll around the school grounds, searching for her new safe haven. Only the sun knew how much she needed some peace and quiet away to drown her frustration after the recent events and their last meeting at the clearing. And Jungkook, after their shared encounter earlier on.

She had her headphones on, whispering soft melodies into her ear, and because of that, she didn’t take notice of someone walking behind her. She was really close to the borders of the woods, staying close by after having left the group’s rendezvous but opting to skip classes to uncloud her thoughts. When she looked up at the sky, the oranges began to fade, and all that golden light blind-sighted her. At this rate, she would lose the sunset.

Then a gulf of wind hit her face and a chill ran down her spine. A pair of hands came in contact with her shoulders and she shivered, remembering the last moments before she and her friends were scared away from the clearing.

Taking her headphones off in a hurry, she turned around startled. The sound of laughter invaded her ears before she could even meet the eyes of her jumpscare.

“Got ya!” the tall golden retriever-like boy exclaimed as soon as she came face to face with him.

“Mingyu!” she stressed. “For fucks sake, I almost died!”

The response she received was more whole hearty laughter and that eased her mood. She smiled seeing him have fun but something else clung to her heart.

Ever since the games, the both of them had grown slightly close. Every time they crossed paths around school, there was a smile there paired with brief hellos and sincere curiosity. By Monday morning a mutual invitation to be each other’s lab partners in one of the few classes they shared—chemistry.

Still, he wasn’t the laughter she sought to hear when all that orange was about to clash with the soon-to-be night sky.

“So what are you doing around here?” Freya asks and the brunette has to wipe his joyful tears to be able to answer.

“I was on my way to the dorms actually. Just got out of practice.”

Freya still couldn’t help but admire his genuine smile and how his freshly washed hair dropped some water droplets on his face. But at the same time, her head was dancing elsewhere. A few yards away, to be exact, where under an oak tree she had made a deal to meet after classes. The sun was setting, but she was still to hear from her free-period companion.

“I saw you walking by and decided to say hi.” Mingyu continued searching for her eyes.

“And that’s how you say hi?” she laughed.

“Next time I’ll try to be more… Charming about it.”

“Next time?” her eyebrow raised. She couldn’t say she ever paid attention to a guy from school before that year, or that she ever really liked a boy from there. Well, besides her friends of course. And that was mostly because she was afraid of things that required too much vulnerability on her side. And a tiny bit because no one had ever seemed worth the struggle she called trust. Did they genuinely like her, or did they just want the status? So the story unfolded naturally. There were too many eyes, and being a great wall to climb became a trait of personality she was too comfortable with to change.

Ever since she got unrightfully exposed, however, by sneaking into the boys' quarters, some freedom of choice was returned to her in that regard. No one was interested in knowing who the next guy in her love life would be. And so she perhaps was beginning to feel ready to come out of her shell. Both in love and new friendships. But the former wasn’t the risk she wanted to take when it came to Mingyu… Possibly if someone else hadn’t arrived in that department first.

He seemed to understand her line of thinking as his eyes got bigger and his expression turned sour. Suddenly he was apologizing.

“Oh–I’m so–So sorry!” he shook his head as if realizing what he had just done. “You have a boyfriend. I’m being disrespectful. I’m sorry.”

At first, she was confused. Boyfriend? She didn’t have one. That wasn’t her point at all. But then the recent events hit her like a truck and she had to inhale hard to get hold of the little patience she still had.

She liked Mingyu. She could tell they could be good friends, amazing even. So she took a leap of faith.

“Can I tell you a secret?” she asked. Freya didn’t have much to lose at this point, and she needed this. A safe space of her own.

Mingyu nodded attentively.

“Yoongi isn’t my boyfriend. We never even hooked up.”

She could see in Mingyu’s face how surprised he was. All the engines of his brain working to make sense of what she had just confessed. Freya was relieved, however, to finally get it out of her system. That someone knew the truth besides her and her girlfriends. That she was at least in control of that tiny little confession and somehow still free. She almost did it earlier on that day anyways.

“Why…?” the words fell off his lips, afraid to lengthen the subject in question. Freya offered an encouraging glance, waiting for his inquiry to be resumed. He got hold of what her eyes wanted to convey this time. “Why are you two pretending to date then?”

“I guess Yoongi knew how much bothered I would be by the amount of gossip even though I pretend I’m not… And he also knew people wouldn’t shut up about it until a name was given to the starving crowd. So why not his? Everyone already assumed we were together anyways.”

“I’m proud to say I’ve never thought that,” Mingyu confessed, raising his hand as a solemn promise. “I even argued otherwise.”

Freya chuckled, finding it endearing. “You would have been the only one then.”

The darkness of the night was already covering every nook of the school like a cloak when the group of friends received a text from Elena.

Nothing but three words. Classroom 202 now.

Receiving a text from the girl after what went down that afternoon seemed hard enough to conceive, let alone one so encrypted like that. And so, each and every one of them immediately stopped what they had been doing and rushed in secret through the marble tiles of the main building in search of the room she invited them in.

One by one they entered. Elena was already there, pacing back and forth when the first of them arrived—Taehyung. It was evident that she possessed some kind of information that she would much more like to be false thinking of her part. He didn’t need a second look at her to prove that.

Hoseok and Namjoon entered right after. Kaya was a few seconds behind them, and they all felt the same. Besides being afraid of possible detention for running through the halls so late at night, all sat in silence waiting, taking in the gravity of the situation by glancing into each other's eyes in the dark. And it didn’t get better as the more they waited, the more impatient and eerie they all got.

Elena still paced, cryptic. Sometimes she would look out the window or check the door for the ones missing. She would hear some of them whispering to each other questions she couldn’t lose time answering, nor had the patience since she was still hurt by their last meeting. At least not unless everyone was present.

And then Yoongi opened the door, everyone looked at him frightened and relieved at the same time. Some searched for something behind his back with their phones flashlights and that made him turn around to check the hallway. It was too dark.

“What?” he asked, spooked, searching for their eyes once again. His hand is still on the knob, keeping the door open, as he too turns on the light from his device.

Elena paces quickly in his direction, pulling him into the classroom and peeking outside to check if he was indeed alone. She closed the door rushedly. “Are you alone?”

“Yes,” Yoongi replied confused. “Shouldn’t I be?”

“We’re missing my sister,” Taehyung said, going toward the window alarmed. The only thing he could see through that darkness was the woods silhouette.

“Ok…?” Yoongi continued completely clueless, barely making sight of everyone present in the room due to the poor illumination. “What am I missing? We better have a fucking good reason to be out here.”

But no one replied. Or even attempted to.

Both girls looked at each other in a silent question about Freya’s whereabouts, putting their resentment aside momentarily. They reached the same conclusion with a hopeless shrug of shoulders. And Hoseok’s concerns didn’t help to lift the mood.

“You don’t think she was attacked like Joy… right? She wouldn’t…” As soon as he questioned it Jin slapped his arm with a hard stare and he shut up flustered. But the possibility taunted everyone present.

There was a pause. Time halted in that classroom. In a flash, Elena pulled her phone to text Freya in desperation, the faint flashlight from her mobile turned off in the process and the room got darker than it already was.

“I’ll go look” Jungkook offered, a dagger piercing his stomach for missing out on both his and Freya’s promise to spend the after classes period together. Right at the same time, Taehyung crossed the room to the door.

“C’mon…” Yoongi mumbled as he pressed his mobile closer to his ear, trying to call the girl in question. He had finally grasped the gravity of the situation.

Jimin and Kaya were by the big window, swiping the landscape beneath them inch by inch. A red bleep twinkled by the edge of the forest and Jimin leaned his nose against the cold glass to try and see it again. He squinted his eyes, but nothing appeared. When he was beginning to think his eyes were playing tricks on him, he got startled by the sound coming from the door. He turned back in a flash. As soon as Taehyung opened it to set foot outside he came to a halt. Jungkook consequently bumped into his back like a domino.

“Get inside!” They heard Freya’s hushed voice demand. “Turn that off. Now!”

Suddenly the room was engulfed in a deep blackness. The kind of dark that makes the hairs on your nape jump. The one that makes every fear you have come true. No one dared to whisper a word out. All they could do was search for each other’s shadows and listen closely for the haunting sound of thumping against the cold marble floors of the corridor.

A few minutes passed, maybe seconds when Yoongi lit his phone again. Time was hard to pinpoint when faced with the extreme nothingness of a total blackout. Soon, all convinced that the night guard had moved on from that section, they all turned the soft light of their screens back on again.

“Sorry–” Freya was the first to break the silence. “I was already outside… Had to go around that security.”

“Just. Please,” Kaya begged on edge, “Let’s get on with this–Whatever this is and go to our rooms. Please.”

In a silent agreement, all eyes turned to Elena.

The strawberry-blonde girl lifted up from the crouch she was previously hiding in and leaned on the teacher’s desk. The ones close to the floor followed, sitting by the empty wooden chairs in front of the class. Only Jungkook and Yoongi were up. One leaned by the wall and the other by the door to keep watch.

“I texted you all here because I think I figured it out,” Elena says, a bit taken aback by her own statement.

“What do you mean…?” Jimin inquires, and everyone looks as if the world would end. Because in fact, it was.

“I know who You is.”

next chapter.

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xoxiu · 10 months

Text

autumn outside the post office - jin x reader

chapter four table of contents masterlist join the taglist

≪ how long will beautiful things last? ≫

summary: it wasn't your fault that dr. kim was the most beautiful man you've ever seen. falling for him was entirely your fault, however. first semester at college and you're already dreaming of a student/professor relationship- so naughty and against the code of conduct. you like the thrill, though.

tags/warnings: smut, teacher!jin, college au, cute yet forbidden romance, daddy dom!jin, love triangles, frat boys jungkook and taehyung, age regression, age play, ddlg, spanking, eating disorders, mental health, first love, exhibitionism, lots of blowjobs, age gap

taglist: @severecatsheep

"Today we're going to be starting our first novel, Our Twisted Hero."

For once, you stared outside the window during literature class, looking at something other than Dr. Kim. You felt too guilty, uncomfortable, and dirty after what you did. He was your professor, and you kissed him.

And you liked it.

What made it all worse is that you wanted more. You wanted to be absolutely destroyed by this man, and then lovingly cuddled immediately after. You wanted him, nothing but him, and all of him.

"y/n?" A voice called out your name- it was Dr. Kim. You snapped out of your thoughts and turned your focus back on the class. Seokjin smiled as you did so.

"Thank you for rejoining us." You blushed out of embarrassment- you had been caught daydreaming.

The class continued with no other distractions. Still, you were in a dazed high from yesterday. Nothing felt real as you jotted down assignments in your planner. Just like that, you were distracted again. Little hearts covered the empty spaces of your planner as you mindlessly doodled on.

"y/n!" Dr. Kim scolded this time, slamming a book against the desk. You jumped in your seat, sitting up straight and giving your full attention to the professor. A blush heated your face as everyone turned to look at you.

"Since some of us don't want to pay attention, class is over now. Remember to have up to page 20 read and your study guide done for Monday." He looked back at you, solely addressing you, "y/n, I'd like to speak with you for a moment."

You slowly began to pack up your backpack as students filed out of the classroom. Dr. Kim made his way to the back of the class towards you, his eyes burning holes into you. He smirked as you kept your head down, refusing to look up at him.

"You really can't keep me off your mind, can you?" He teased, putting a finger under your chin, forcing you to look at him. His stare soon turned cold again, "Look at me when I'm speaking to you, hun."

"Yes, sir," you blushed at the pet name. Looking down, you noticed a growing bulge in Seokjin's slacks.

"My eyes are up here, y/n." He gripped your chin forcefully. "See something you like?"

You opened your mouth, but no words came out. Seokjin released your face and reached behind you to close the blinds. The room grew significantly darker, especially in the back where a fluorescent light above you had burnt out. Wetting your lips, you couldn't keep your eyes off the professor as he leaned against the back wall.

"Knees, now."

Without hesitation, you kneeled on the floor, shuffling closer so you were closer to Dr. Kim. He smiled down at you, running a hand through your hair. You leaned into the touch and closed your eyes.

"Such a good girl, so obedient for Daddy." Seokjin tugged at your hair, forcing a small gasp out of you. Your panties grew wetter from his words. Not a single thought was running through your mind except for Dr. Kim.

The man chuckled above you. "I'm not sure if you deserve this after not paying attention in class. Or was this exactly what you were thinking of?" All you could do was let out a pitiful whine, looking back and forth between his bulge and his face.

"Hmm? What's that? Not as brave as you were yesterday, huh?"

Kissing him felt like nothing; you had kissed guys before this. However, not once were you so close to another person's private area, teetering on the edge of sex. It felt exciting, yet intimidating.

"I-I don't know..." You mumbled, feeling a lot more shy and exposed. You looked away towards the door, anxious that someone may come in. Seokjin seemed to pick up on your worries.

"No one has this room reserved for another hour, don't worry. It's just us." Another hand ran through your hair, gently stroking it and placing a stray strand behind your ear.

You weren't ready for this. It felt wrong. As your eyes darted around the room, you anxiously bounced on your legs. Leading the professor on like this was a horrible thing to do, and for what? All you had was a little crush and now look at you, kneeling in front of your teacher with soaked panties as he palmed his hard-on.

"Maybe you're not ready for this cock, is that it?" You nodded your head, embarrassed tears glazing over your eyes. Your hands came up to cover your face from any more embarrassment or shame.

Seokjin picked you up and placed you on the table next to your bag. You moved your hands away from your face, allowing him to deeply kiss you. Kissing him felt so easy, and when he tugged gently on your bottom lip, you went crazy. Your hands wrapped around his broad shoulders, pulling him deeper. His tongue found its way into your mouth, and your eyes shot wide open. You pulled away from the kiss, not liking the feeling.

"What's wrong?" Dr. Kim asked, his face full of concern. Biting your lip, you stared at his beautiful, full lips, now tinted red.

"I don't like tongue," You felt ashamed to admit, "Sensory thing..."

He giggled at your bashfulness, placing a gentle peck on your lips.

"I'll try to remember that."

————

The Korean Cultural meeting took place in the library. You decided to skip your meeting at the last minute, deeming it pointless. Classes had been going well, better than well in fact, so you saw no point in attending.

As you approached, Dr. Kim sent you a smile. He pulled out an empty chair for you right next to him. All eyes were now on you. You tensed up as you took a seat, looking around the table with a wavering smile.

Jimin and Taehyung sat across from you, hyping up your arrival. 'There she is!' 'The party can start now!' 'As beautiful as ever!' You blushed at their cheers, desperately wanting them to just shut up. They were so nice and friendly, maybe a bit too much, but it always made you smile.

There were many people you didn't know. They stared at you with confusion, questioning who you were and why Jimin and Taehyung acted so excited to see you. At the end of the table sat Cara with another boy. She was all over him, her legs over his lap and arms embracing his neck, basically sitting on his lap. The boy looked mighty uncomfortable and tired until his eyes landed on you. He looked you up and down, smirking.

You couldn't help but notice his shirt with 'TKE' on it in giant letters. Oh, he was in Tau Kappa Epsilon with Taehyung. Upperclassmen had warned you about them, and how they were the unruly frat house constantly on the verge of being suspended from Greek life. Taehyung made you believe the rumors were all exaggerated lies, but one look at the boy across the table only confirmed the stereotypes. He looked like trouble.

By the time the meeting start time came around, roughly 16 students were in attendance. Once the table capacity was reached, Seokjin gave up his seat next to you, opting to stand between the tables the club was using. There was another professor you didn't recognize who lead the meeting, with Dr. Kim commenting every once in a while.

You felt eyes on you at all times. From the boy at your table to Dr. Kim, you knew you were being watched. You tried your best to ignore it, listening to the speaker, but you couldn't help but take quick glances.

The boy looked you over as if examining you closely. He looked impressed by you, making you feel small under his gaze. His eyes watched your every move, focusing a bit too much on your chest area, as if you were a theatre act. He didn't want to miss a moment of you.

Dr. Kim's eyes were softer, more welcoming. He looked almost proud of you for showing up tonight, thankful that you came. You didn't miss his wink as your eyes met, making you blush and quickly look away.

The meeting concluded sooner than you thought- only lasting a solid 15 minutes. A packet was passed out to everyone, detailing upcoming meetings, events, and a study abroad trip to Korea.

Led by Mr. Kim.

You were the last one remaining at the meeting, logging the meetings and events into your planner. A hand on your shoulder made you jump- you swore you were alone.

"Thank you for coming tonight," Dr. Kim looked down at you with a smile. Smiling back, you closed your planner, giving Seokjin your whole attention.

"I'm sorry about earlier," he said, looking genuinely remorseful.

"It's okay, you didn't know."

Seokjin checked the time on his watch. "I think the buses stopped for the day by now. Shall I drive you home?"

Flustered, you stammered out gibberish. You knew the buses hadn't stopped their routes yet, not until 10 pm. Dr. Kim was lying to you, trying to persuade you into getting into his car. Hesitation flooded your thoughts. You knew that if you got in his car, this relationship would cross the boundaries of a professional relationship. Leaving campus with a teacher was a major red flag. There would be no going back.

"Sure."

#bts fanfic #seokjin x reader #kim seokjin #teacher/student #bts smut #college au #kim namjoon #min yoongi #jung hoseok #park jimin #kim taehyung #jeon jungkook #bts #autumn outside the post office

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pinktyuns · 11 months

Text

shoegaze sex - kang taehyun

summary : ( no sex involved ) in which taehyun doesn’t realize that you’re the lead guitarist of a shoegaze punk band called shoegaze sex when you move in. all he knows is that he hates your loud music, and in turn, hates you. that is until he doesn’t.

genre : roommate!taehyun x beomgyus bsf & lead guitarist of a band!reader

warnings : cursing, kys jokes, lots of anime references, taehyun has valid anger towards reader, taehyun is oblivious & stupid, slow burn (sorry), mentions of smurf murder, TOOTH ROTTING FLUFF, taehyun is sweet, reader hates conflict and runs away from it, reader hates confrontation and it gets annoying, kissing (cute), taehyun is shirtless & abs are out, full sleeve jungkook, lots of talk about shoegaze music, yeonjun is the HOT lead singer of the band and taehyun is jealous and insecure compared to him :(, hueningkai plays drums!! sunghoon from enhypen plays bass and taehyun is jealous of him too :(, protective over reader beomgyu, mentions of namjoons insane tits, cuddling, happy ending

also featuring : tomorrow x together, enhypens sunghoon & jungwon, le sserafims yunjin, bts’ namjoon & jungkook

a/n : my first tyun series is here!! i could not get the idea of roommate taehyun outta my mind so here this is. im so excited & have no idea how long this is gonna be but its so gonna be so cute & fueled by my love of shoegaze music lol. im on summer break now so i will update whenever, i hope u love her <3

------------------------------------------------------

teaser

profiles :

taehyun & friends

y/n & shoegaze sex + yunjin

parts :

chapter one - he's hot!

120 notes · View notes

jvngkook97 · 1 year

Note

So basically I’m thinking of one with like Jungkook and like it’s teacherxstudent and obv he’s the teacher and the reader and him are like enemies, but idfk 😭 😭 😭 smthing happens and theirs like a lot of angst bc I’m a angst lover 😍😍😍😍 You can choose what happens next and you can add smut if u’d like to ♥️

It could also be Namjoon because he just screams Sexy Teacher

~ K

Stain

synopsis; in which you meet the love of your life at the wrong time.

pairing; professor!Namjoon x student!reader ft. student!jungkook

genre; angst, fluff, humor, s2l, l2e, professor au, student au, college au

warnings; cursing, heavy angst, minor age gap but still within legal age (Namjoon is 28, reader is 23), student x teacher relationship (kind of you’ll see), implied smut but nothing graphic, some fluffy moments ~

rating; 21+ MINORS DNI

w/c; 4,366

a/n; let me just say…IT WAS SO HARD TO CHOOSE. And most importantly: I do not condone any type of student x teacher relationship and even though they’re both of legal age in this fic, it still doesn’t make it right (in my opinion, no hate pls) with that being said if this isn’t your cup of tea that’s ok!! pls skip this one and check out my masterlist of other fics you may be interested in!! just be sure to read the warnings before you continue! enough rambling, enjoy!!

When you first saw him, it was by chance. More of a fleeting moment, really. One that’s common between two strangers.

When he actually saw you, he saw art come to life in front of his eyes.

When your worlds finally collide, it brings nothing but chaos.

Shit. Shit. Shit.

That was the only word running through your mind as you pumped your legs, willing them to push through the ache and pain you currently felt as you dodged people left and right muttering a half-assed apology over your shoulder. The bus you were trying to catch was only a few yards ahead of you, hope filled your mind, air filled your lungs, and you made it just in the nick of time to stop the doors from closing with your hand.

The driver gives you the stink eye, but ultimately doesn’t have a say when you pay the bus fine for the day. All he does is grunt in greeting, jerking his head back towards the seats as a gesture for you to hurry it up and sit down.

You don’t have to be told twice.

Trying your best to keep your focus ahead of you, you let your peripheral scan the options of seats available. You see one near the back of the bus and make an instant beeline to it. On the way, the glare of the sun through the windows blinds you momentarily, enough for you to stop walking, hand falling on the corner of the seat next to you in order to keep yourself balanced when the bus starts moving.

A male sitting in the seat just behind is wearing a brown corduroy coat, heavily focused on the inky black words that adorn the tattered, worn book he’s reading. The way he holds it let’s you know it has to be one of his favorites, and when a ghost of a smile cracks on his closed lips, it breaks you out of your reverie, a slight tint appearing to your cheeks when you think you’ve been caught staring. When his eyes stay down as he flips another page, you allow yourself to hastily walk pass him and sit down in the vacant seat unnoticed.

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

You don’t see him again until a few days later, and this time, you’re not alone.

A slender, tattooed finger flicks you on the forehead and you blink harshly, flinching back from the sudden digit and glaring at the male who is bent over in front of you laughing to himself at your pain.

“You are such an arse, Jungkook.”

“It’s not my fault that you zone out so deeply every time you come across an artwork you like and it’s impossible to reel you back into reality!”

You blow a raspberry at him. He blows one back.

The crowd within the museum is surprisingly thick, probably due to the latest still life exhibit by Elias Whitley, a promising up and coming artist and photographer. The only way you were able to see it, and be there, was to ditch school for a day. Something, your best friend didn’t mind doing at all.

However, if he knew it was going to be such a bore, he would’ve just stayed in class.

“I’m going to snack at the finger foods table until they tell me to stop, you good on your own?”

“I’m good, thank you. Just don’t get kicked out, please.”

“No promises.”

With a wink and finger guns, he’s lost within the throe of people around you. You sigh softly to yourself, and turn to walk further into the crowd. Your goal is to make it to one of his latest art pieces, one that you’ve come to personally vibe with yourself. Upon making it, you take your time with scanning each and every paint stroke you can see.

What originally drew you to it was the colors he used, much different than those he would normally utilize. This one was a multitude of purples, pinks, oranges, yellows, and blacks. It almost looked something akin to a sunset being mirrored by the ocean that you would see on the horizon. Tilting your head, you get a different angle, hip unknowingly jutting out a little too far and bumping another fellow art lover next to you.

You immediately straighten up with an apology on your lips that gets cut off midway when you see the male in front of you. Or, if you’re being more technical, you see his brown corduroy jacket first before slowly trailing your eyes up said jacket to meet his for the first time.

His smile is subtle, but friendly.

“Hey, it’s okay. You’re just trying to see the art in a different perspective, I can respect that. I take it you’re a fan of Mr. Whitley?”

You blink once, twice, before your mouth finally catches up with your brain.

“I–Yes! I only recently found him off of a blog I love to follow, they travel to different exhibits and give thoughtful critiques that I tend to agree with.”

“Oh?” His brows raise in intrigue. “Who is this person you follow?”

“Well, I’m not sure his actual name, but I can give you his name handle if you’d like?”

“That’s perfect.”

“Okay–just—“ you fumble in your clutch purse for the pen you always keep just incase, as well as a little notepad. You scrawl down the name of the blog and rip off the page it’s written on, handing it to him.

He gives a low hum of approval as he reads it, nodding his head. A sly smile slowly forms, before his eyes look up from the paper to once again link with yours.

“I also agree with this ‘rkives’ critiques.”

Your mouth forms an ‘o’, and you can feel the excitement build in you for having found someone to share your enthusiasm with.

“Wait, really? You’ve heard of them as well?”

“Him.”

A confused smile forms on your lips.

“How do you know it’s a guy?”

He’s silent for a moment, looking down at his phone as he types away at something. For a second, he scrolls, searching for something unknown to you. When he finds it, does he turn the front of his phone to face you. It’s an article about the blog you follow, but that’s not what catches your eye.

“No way.”

What you see is a blown up image of the person behind the blog at the bottom of the article and low and behold — he’s standing right in front of you.

He smiles, amused at your reaction, before stuffing his phone back in his jacket pocket.

“I am such a big fan of yours, holy shit.”

He chuckles, a dimple you didn’t notice before forming in the crease of his smile.

“Thank you. That means a lot. Would you like to possibly walk the rest of the exhibit together?”

“Yes!” He holds out his arm for you take, and just like that, the rest of the time at the exhibit passes by in a blur of deep talks, art styles, artist favorites, and detailed critiques from the mouth of your favorite blogger.

It’s not until the crowds begin to thin out, and the loudspeaker announces the end of the exhibit do you both make your way back to the entrance doors.

He holds the door open for you to walk through, both of you now outside in the chilly air of winter. Your breaths mingle together as you talk, and you try your best not to sound as sad as you feel for not wanting the night to end.

“I guess this is it. Thank you so much for humoring a fan, I can’t wait to see what else you post!”

A light hue blossoms on his cheeks, but whether it’s from the bitter, crisp air, or something else, you’re not sure. He clears his throat, then gives you an offer you can’t refuse.

“Would you maybe want to grab a cup of coffee with me? Or tea? Whichever you prefer, it’s on me.” His voice is hopeful, and when he sees the light in your eyes appear again, he feels his chest burst with a warmth.

“I would love too, really, but I just–,” he’d be lying if he said he wasn’t disappointed, and you can see it yourself as his body begins to deflate in front of you. It makes your soul hurt. But you need to figure out where Jungkook is before you just decide to ditch him.

Mustering up a vibrant smile, you explain.

“I came here with my friend, Jungkook, and I need to make sure he’s okay before I can agree to go with you, is all.”

Something akin to jealousy flashes across his eyes momentarily, his own smile still plastered on his face. He swallows it down with a look of understanding, which he does – understand your reasoning that is – it’s common decency of course. The thoughtful gesture you show only fuels the butterflies in his stomach as he stares at you.

“Right, yeah. Of course.”

“Just give me one second–,”

You go to your favorites in your phone, pressing down on Jungkook’s name, then put the phone to your ear as you hear it ring. It takes two rings, before his voice is blaring in your ear with a sense of urgency.

“Where have you been, you idiot?! I’ve been trying to get in touch with you all night!”

You purse your lips, feeling terrible for worrying him. Especially when you notice the flurry of texts and calls you failed to notice while with your new friend, forgetting that you set your phone to silent upon entering the exhibit due to not wanting to disturb those around you with unnecessary noise.

“I’m so sorry, Jungkook. Where are you at? I’m at the exhibit entrance–,”

“I’ll be right there.”

He hangs up. You gape at the phone in disbelief. He never hangs up on you.

“Is he okay?”

For a moment, you’re lost in your guilt, the male in front of you becoming invisible.

“He’s fine. He’s on his way here.”

“Y/N!”

A jog of light footsteps could be heard from behind you, and you turn just in time to get enveloped into a warm chest. His arms wrapping around your small frame easily. You let out an ‘oof’ upon contact, your own arms reflexively hugging his waist.

You can feel his body sag in relief, an exhale of a sigh from him makes the top of your hair warm for a split second within the cool, night air. Your words become mumbled against his chest as you speak.

“I’m sorry for worrying you, koo.”

“You’re such an idiot.”

You smack him lightly on the back in retaliation to his words. He chuckles into your hair before letting you go. Then, you watch as his face becomes stoic, body becoming rigid. His eyesight is no longer on you, and that’s when you remember that you’re not alone.

“Oh! This is–,” you flush, embarrassed you don’t know the mystery male’s name after all this time.

“Just call me Namjoon. It’s nice to meet you.”

He politely holds his hand out for Jungkook to shake, which he does, reluctantly, grip firm as well as eye contact. You watch them both with a hesitant smile.

“Jungkook.” His voice is tight. As soon as their hands disconnect, does he make a point of standing flush to your side.

“And you must be, y/n.” Namjoon’s eyes have a twinkle in them, you think. The way your name sounds coming from his mouth sends goosebumps across your skin. “It’s been a pleasure, truly, but now that you’re in safe hands–,” his eyes cut from yours to Jungkook’s with a knowing look between the males, one you’re uncertain of, before he finishes speaking. “I’ll bid you both goodnight.”

With a light bow, and warm smile, he turns to leave–

–until he’s stopped by a warm hand around his wrist.

“Wait!”

He stops, half turning to face you, one brow raised in question and a ghost of a smile on his lips.

“Yes?”

“That coffee, would you maybe want to meet up tomorrow morning?”

“Sure–,”

“Y/N, you have s–,” Jungkook attempts to chime in, but you throw a harsh glare his way that has him shutting up instantly.

Namjoon waits until you’re gaze is back on him before he continues, now fully facing you once again, handing his phone over to you that’s unlocked.

“If you type in your phone number I’ll text you later so we can discuss meeting up further.”

Typing in your phone number, you triple check it’s correct before handing it back to him, fingers touching for a fleeting moment that sends pleasant shockwaves through your body. The look in his eyes tells you that he felt the same thing.

Jungkook clears his throat harshly from behind you.

“We should go, y/n. It’s getting late.”

The two of you share one last goodbye, and then he’s gone, leaving you and Jungkook alone in front of the exhibit. When he’s no longer within eye sight, does Jungkook’s voice cut through the silence in warning.

“Y/N, are you sure about meeting that guy?”

You’re resolute with your answer, tone firm and confident as you continue to stare off in the direction of which you last saw Namjoon, a newfound sparkle in your eyes that makes Jungkook frown in worry at how hung up you are over a guy you just met.

“Yes.”

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

“Text me the code phrase if you want me to call and bail you out of your date. Do you remember it?”

“The Perilla leaf is stuck.”

“Good girl.”

You roll your eyes.

“I can feel you rolling your eyes. Don’t make me get into the Perilla leaf debate again.”

You groan.

“Please don’t. Look, I’m coming up to the coffee shop, I’ll call you when it’s over.”

“Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do!”

You hang up the phone, stuffing it in your purse, and scoff at Jungkook. That guy would try anything once, so his words mean nothing in that regards.

The bell jingles overhead as you push open the door, signaling to workers that a new customer has arrived. The elderly woman at the cash register greets you warmly with a smile.

“Welcome in!”

“Thank you!”

Your eyes scan the tables near you, and your heart begins to drop when you don’t see your date in sight. He didn’t seem like the type to stand people up, but you just never know. Deciding to take a seat next to the floor to ceiling windows, so you could people watch in the meantime, you fold your hands in your lap and wait.

Five minutes turns into fifteen, fifteen turns into thirty. Your hands fidget in your lap, eyes darting everywhere outside in hopes of even catching a glimpse of Namjoon.

Nothing.

You fish your phone back out of your purse to confirm that you did, in fact, get the date and timing right to meet today. You did. While looking down at your phone, the bell jingles. Your eyes flicker up with hope, and you sigh in relief when the familiar male locks eyes with you.

His face is full of guilt as he waves in greeting, long legs bringing him to your table of choice in no time. He pulls out his chair to sit down across from you, hands folding on top of the table.

“I’m so sorry for being late, I had to catch another bus.”

In his defense, you can see the small beads of sweat on his forehead as well as see the rise and fall of his chest, him doing his best not to show you exactly how exhausted he is from running here. Even though a part of you is upset at the late arrival, you can’t bring yourself to be mad at something you’ve been guilty of plenty of times in the past.

“Busses? Am I right? Woe is the life of the weary greyhound traveler.”

He chuckles humorlessly, but nods his head, agreeing with you.

“I hope you weren’t waiting too long.”

“Nah.” You wave your hand dismissively. “Only about fifteen minutes. My bus was late too.” The lie came out so smoothly. You don’t know why you decided to lie. But when he gave you a dimpled grin, it made you feel pride in knowing you caused it.

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

Jungkook’s fingers tap on the top of your shared desk in your classroom for still life photography, his eyes borderline roll themselves into the back of his head with how harshly he’s doing it.

“You’re doing it again.”

“Doing what?” You answer, eyes glued to the phone in your hands, fingers flying over the keyboard with expertise. A lovesick grin is on your face, and he grimaces at it.

“Looking at your phone like you want to make out with it. It’s disgusting.”

“You’re just jealous I’m getting laid and you’re not.”

He snorts, offended.

“Excuse you? If I wanted to get laid, I could get laid. Like, right now.”

You pat his knee with false empathy.

“I’m sure you could, koo, I’m sure you could.”

“You’re damn right! Tell me, what does tall and admittedly handsome have that I don’t–,”

He pauses, eyes widening at something you’re unsure of off to the side of you, suspiciously towards the front of the classroom. You follow his line of sight and let out a small gasp yourself at what you see.

‘What was he doing here?’

Well, you were about to get your question answered.

Namjoon walks to the front of the classroom, and stands directly in the middle of the ridiculously large whiteboard that takes up a full wall of the classroom, picking up a dry erase marker and writes his name elegantly on the board. As he writes each letter, he speaks, voice loud and professional.

“Hello, everyone. I’ll be taking over for Mrs. Lee starting today while she’s on maternity leave. My name is Kim Namjoon, but just call me Mr. Kim. Are there any questions?”

With one final stroke, he pivots on his heel and scans the crowd of college students in front of him. His smile is still prominent, until he unfortunately locks eyes with you, smile immediately falling and eyes widening in realization at your current predicament.

You’re dating your professor. What the f–

Your head falls into your arms on top of the desk and Jungkook awkwardly rubs your back in solidarity with your hidden suffering, all the other classmates oblivious to the life altering moment that just occurred.

‘Now what?’

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

“So, you’re a college professor, huh?”

“And you’re a college student.”

“Quite the predicament you’re in.”

Both you and Namjoon turn to give Jungkook a look, he mimics zipping his lips and throwing away the key. The head he popped out of the kitchen slowly retreats back behind the wall, and he once again resumes his task of fetching everyone some herbal tea, knowing it’s your personal favorite.

You’re all off campus, the school day now over, and no longer needing to put up the facade of being strangers. Jungkook was oh so kind(not really you had to bribe him with doing his English lit homework for a month) enough to allow his small apartment to be the hideout of your now scandalous love affair.

“What exactly does this mean for us?”

He leans back against the couch, rubbing his hands down his face with disdain, a loud exhale escapes his parted lips as he dreads what he’s about to say to you. There’s only one solution to this conflict. And even though you know what he’s about to say yourself, it still doesn’t make it hurt any less.

These past seven months have been the happiest you’ve ever felt, being with Namjoon. Everyday he made a point to send you a picture of a new piece of art he’s found on his travels, especially when you’re not able to go with him. You used to always be more of a homebody, only going out when needed, like when Jungkook would force you. With Namjoon, however, he made you see the world differently.

It didn’t matter if you were just taking a stroll down a dark and dreary street in the rain, he always had some kind of poetic or insightful thought about the smallest details that always had you looking up at him in awe. The large crack on the sidewalk that now has a weed sprouting out of it? It’s just natures way of taking back what was rightfully theirs before man came and poured cement over the ground.

Little things like that helped pave a new mindset in you about seeing people, places and things in a new light. It made you see that not everything has to be black and white, but rather it should be vibrant and demanding and beautiful.

So damn beautiful, he thought, as he let the silence linger around you in favor of watching the light of the tv that’s playing a cheesy rom-com requested by you in the background hit the side of your face, illuminating it perfectly. Your eyes are sad, though, and in turn it makes him sad. He knows you know.

A large hand encompasses your own that’s resting between you two on the couch, he gives it a gentle squeeze. You squeeze back.

Your voice is light, barely a whisper, and the lump in your throat makes it difficult to utter a coherent word. You know it’s no use asking, but still, you try.

“Maybe we can still make this work? Somehow?”

He pinches the bridge of his nose with his other hand in hopes of it deterring the water in his eyes from falling down his cheeks. He hates this, every part of this. When he looks at you again, you’re biting your bottom lip to stop it from trembling.

“I don’t want you to go.”

He swears his heart shattered right then and there with your small, desperate plea. He knows he needs to get it over with and leave before he becomes desperate enough to let his heart overpower his mind.

“You know I don’t want too–,”

“Then don’t!”

“But I need too.”

“Namjoon, please–,”

He leans forward to close the distance and give your forehead one last lingering kiss, before squeezing your hand just to let it go. He stands up from the couch you were both perched on stiffly, shrugging his brown, corduroy jacket that you’ve grown to love over his broad shoulders with his back towards you. It’s in this moment that you hate how tall he is, his long strides taking him to the front of Jungkook’s apartment in seconds.

Jungkook is just about to walk out of the kitchen with a tray of three steaming teas until he sees Namjoon briskly walk pass him and you following close behind with false hope in your eyes. Once again, he decides to fall back into the safety of the kitchen to let whatever is about to happen occur naturally, no matter how much his heart breaks at hearing your many attempts to get Namjoon to stay.

Namjoon’s hand twists the doorknob, and the door opens swiftly. He goes to step out into the hallway, until it gets slammed shut in front of him due to you throwing your body weight on top of it. The impact makes your shoulder ache, but you can’t bring yourself to care.

“Don’t you love me?”

His shoulders deflate, his strong persona beginning to crack.

“Y/N, you know that I do. But that’s not the issue.”

“I’ll drop out!” You spew out randomly, and at the time, it seems like the best idea you’ve ever had. Namjoon’s eyes widen in shock, his hands coming to rest on top of your shoulders as he lightly shakes you in an attempt to break you out of your stupor.

“Are you crazy? Do you hear yourself right now? You’ve put so much of your blood, sweat and tears into just making it into this college so you could fulfill your dream! I’m not going to let you throw that away over me!”

“But–,” his grip tightens, and any word you say gets silenced by his lips pressing hard against yours. You can feel his passion, his love. You sink into it, and he allows the moment to last longer than it needs too, but damn it all that he had to lose you after taking so long to finally find you.

It wasn’t fair. But, he thinks, life isn’t fair to begin with. Why would it be any different for him?

When he pulls away, his eyes stay closed. His forehead gently falls on yours, his hands sliding their way up to lightly cradle the junction between your neck and head. His thumbs brush over your jawline and you let out a broken sob that has him biting his lip harshly enough that he can taste a hint of metallic on his tongue.

“I love you, y/n. And, unfortunately, I love you enough to know when I need to let you go.”

This time, you don’t resist when he gently pulls your body away from the door enough to slip out of the crack and out of your life. And it’s not until you’re a sobbing mess on the floor of Jungkook’s entryway that he timidly peaks his head around the corner to see you and rush over to your fallen form. His arms encase your body against his tightly, one hand on your head, and the other on your back. You can vaguely hear the little ‘shhh’s’ and ‘I’m here’ and ‘you’re going to be okay’ as you let his voice along with Namjoon’s words of love ease you off to sleep where you can dream of a perfect world with you and Namjoon together, forever.

*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*

a/n dos; it is almost midnight and I’m sleepy. This is unedited and I personally think it’s shit but I still hope you enjoy it somehow. ha ha ha ok bye

125 notes · View notes

singguks · 2 years

Text

#fighton! ✱ 3 | bts

synopsis. like every college, this one also has gossip and drama to fill the hallways, as well as lot’s of parties and games to attend. but when two of the most popular groups start to collide the whole campus goes into havoc. suddenly all eyes are on them. what will be the final outcome of this clash of clans?

📕 this is a revamp; the old archive is here

pairing. bts x oc's

genre. college au + fluff + slice of life + smut + angst

word count. 17.5k

warnings. unresponsible drinking, lots of fights, and sexual tension.

a/n. dedicated to @tangyguk as a belated happy birthday gift!! thank you for being part of our precious group ♡ we adore you dearly and wish to have you next to us for many more years!! here's to you, sunny, and to your day. happy twelve of august ☀️

✱ chapters. #1 — #2 — #3 — #4

Carolina’s cell phone display marked eight-thirty am and the girl couldn’t help but shake her leg up and down in pure anxiety.

She hated arriving late to practices in general, but today she just couldn’t.

As it turns out, today was the first volleyball official game of the season. The male team would be competing later in the evening to classify, and whenever they had big games like that the whole team would be called to train together and help appoint errors on whatever they needed to better in court so they would be ready to ace the other team.

“Hey,” Ben called for her, his eyes trailing to the car changing lanes in front of them. “You’ll arrive in time, don’t worry!” He chuckled, finding the way she was clutching her seat belt in the passenger seat actually funny but also adorable.

Carolina didn’t say a word, just nodded in agreement. For a second there, she felt guilty for choosing to sleep in Ben’s place instead of her own apartment, knowing it was way closer to the pavilion and Jin would always know shortcuts to get her on time.

Her mind was only able to rest at ease when Ben parked the car right in front of the main door, and she gave him a quick peck before jumping out of the vehicle and running towards the locker room. She had precisely seven minutes to change her clothes, before the coach blew his whistle, marking the beginning of practice.

She managed to barge through the court’s door a few seconds before Mr. Hoffman, their coach, blew that annoying thing he always carried around his neck. The players were all aligned, looking at Mr. Hoffman as he remarked stoically, “I thought you would miss today's sess too, Jones.”

“When did I ever?” Carolina punched back filling her spot on the line, and gaining what it felt to the start of a smile on the coach’s face.

Mr. Hoffman had been a volley player too back in the days, so his natural stature of six foot one and his cranky face could make anyone step back in fear. But for the ones that dared to know the man better, or drive him mad at every opportunity like Carolina did, it was clear as day he was nothing but a softy deep down. He was just really stressed and short-tempered.

“Alright.” He gave in. “Just don’t throw up like Jeremy over there… I know you guys had a party last night, but suck the hangover in, alright?! Shouldn’t hav’ gone to it in the first place.”

They all held in laughter seeing the male’s team opposite hitter, Jeremy, laid on a bench, arm over his eyes like the world was ending. If they didn’t know him better, concern about him not being able to play in tonight’s game would surface, but then again, Jeremy was out and about every day.

Countless times had he arrived minutes before practice with a massive hangover. And if you’re wondering… No, the coach didn’t need to take any measures. Jeremy is a wild card alright, but he’s also one of the best out there; he can be anything but unprofessional when it comes to volley. Or unpassionate.

“So that’s where you were last night!” Lu whispered indignantly at Carolina’s ear while eyeing the bleachers. “I can’t believe you missed a sleepover at my house because of that gorgeous and sexy as hell man over there.” She added, making Carolina laugh and glance quickly at Ben, who waved at her.

She saluted him jokingly, making him flash a big smile before she turned back to face the court to start practicing. And while she chatted cheerfully with Lu about her rendezvous, simultaneously stretching, a pair of eyes on the other side of the net followed her every move.

Jungkook still hadn’t swallowed the scene he had witnessed the previous night. And seeing his teacher in the bleachers, staring at Carolina without a care in the world, wasn’t sitting right in his stomach.

“JK?” Eunwoo, the male’s team setter, called for him again as he was lost in thoughts. “You following?”

“Huh?” He snapped his head back to the actual team. As Eunwoo pressed again with a raise of his eyebrows, smiling at Jungkook’s unusual loss of focus when it came to the sport, he shook his head. “Sorry, yeah. Go on,”

Eunwoo had been explaining what plays he wanted to make for their game later that evening, as he had been up late at night studying the other team’s moves.

While he did so, and the rest of the team listened attentively, the girls were completely dispersed. The team itself wasn’t as close as the boys were, and that resulted in some inner circles as they stretched or practiced.

Truth is, ever since Carolina arrived on the team there had been problems. Jennifer’s posh attitude had crashed immensely with hers, and to worsen the situation, the coach had appointed Carolina to the setter position and the starter line without even doing much training.

At first, the collision was mostly bickering and eyes rolling here and there. Jennifer would always try to anger the girl somehow, but Carolina stood her ground without paying much mind. With time—not that long as you are probably thinking—things started running south. After the setter heard that conversation between Jennifer and Jungkook, she no longer ignored her snarky remarks or childish behavior. Carolina started barking back and that made things between the team shift.

“Let’s move!” Mr. Hoffman demanded with arms crossed while his assistants kept a closer look at the players that were jumping up and down and taking their positions on the court.

They were going to start the practice with the male team starter line playing against a mix of the female team starters and the male players that were on the bench as the coach would definitely make them substitute on the first or second sets.

Jungkook was by the net and although Jennifer kept smiling at him from the other side, craving his attention, he had his eyes elsewhere. The bleachers.

“Don’t take it easy on us,” Eunwoo smiled friendly while offering his fist beneath the net to Carolina, who took the same position as him on the other team.

She bumped it gladly, “Never!”

Tracy, Jennifer’s best friend and the middle blocker of the female team, was getting ready to serve. Jungkook’s eyes went to follow her movement to try and predict where the ball would come to but all he could see was Ben’s figure leaning forward with a grin on his face while ogling Carolina.

Is he looking at…?

“My bad!” their libero shouted as he failed to correct the ball’s trajectory to a perfect pass.

Eunwoo moved swiftly to get the second touch and arrange the perfect position for one of his hitters. Jungkook saw the exact moment he was about to pass it to Jeremy, but he really needed that one. He needed to carve that ball deep into the court to let some steam off.

“Open!” the raven-haired boy shouted with his right arm up; eyes eager and about to burn.

Eunwoo didn’t think, he didn’t need to. Whenever this happened, his body reacted instinctively to Jungkook’s motion, much like a magnet. And so he tossed the ball to his teammate in a perfect parabole.

Jungkook took a swing as if he was about to fly.

As his body was raised closer to the net, he targeted the spot intended for the ball to go, and his hand came in like an unmerciful whip. Carolina, Tracy, and Jason jumped to block it, but they all knew it was a lost battle. Whenever Jungkook attained such a majestic form on the other side of the net, a point was guaranteed. So they all looked back when they heard the loud bang the ball made, but much to their surprise, it hadn't come in touch with the wooden floor like it always did.

“Fuck!” They heard a loud groan coming from the bleachers.

Carolina gasped as she saw the ball rolling down the seats, right next to Ben, who had his right hand over his shoulder with closed eyes and furrowed brows.

“Holy…! Ben!” She went running toward him after the scene sank into her mind. To her relief, Mr. Hoffman had already sent his assistant to check on the man injured before her.

Jungkook kept panting from the other side with his hands on his hips; his expression far from guilt or regret.

“I’ve never seen you be so accurate before,” Eunwoo tapped on Jungkook’s shoulder with a naughty chuckle and a nod of his head making his teammate scoff and turn around to go fetch another ball.

Jimin wasn’t supposed to be awake. At least not at eleven in the morning.

He and Taehyung had arrived way too late last night, both unable to find their building or even walk straight for the matter. By the time they managed to do so, the sun was already shining bright on the horizon, turning everything it touched into shades of soft gold.

The jock had planned to stay in bed until a bit after lunchtime, only getting up to eat something and then going back to his safe haven until it was time to get ready for yet another massive event—the volley team game and its party. Unfortunately, as he struggled to open his eyes, alarmed by the maddening sound of an unknown alarm, he saw himself in a different scenario.

The owner of said alarm, Taehyung, sleeps soundly on the other side of the room, without mention of moving or even turning off the diabolical thing.

So Jimin was forced to get up to do so.

He kicked his blankets to the side, lazily crossing the distance to pick his friend's device up just to state his fear. Frowning to see how early it was, he cussed under his breath. The situation was about to turn south, as he turned off the maddening sound, ready to wake his roommate up with at least a pull on his leg when he spotted her.

Right on the front lawn, under the willow tree that made their dorm have the best view compared to the others on campus, Jimin spotted Sarah.

He didn’t have his glasses or contacts on, but he knew, from the way she laughed with her whole body, to her blonde locks fluttering in the light morning breeze that it was her. He had admired her long enough to know.

The girl was accompanied by a group of friends, and she was the only one standing while the rest of them sat on top of a sarong extended on the lawn. They all looked at her, laughing as well. From what Jimin could gather, she was quite the taleteller.

He looked at the device in his hand again. It was seven minutes to eleven-thirty. Jimin sighed. And then forgetting all about his rest, he opened his wardrobe, picking a pair of jeans and a loose dress shirt to put on.

Not even fifteen minutes later, he was walking out of the building, teeth brushed, hair messily combed back with a pair of sunglasses to support his casual style.

The coffee shop was right across, and he would definitely pass by Sarah if he were to trace through the lawn instead of going around it. It was perfect.

But he should have predicted she would spot him first. And then what could have been a serendipitous moment became just a long catwalk while she stared at him with a large smile, and a hand over her eyes so the sun could be blocked.

“Enjoying a morning walk after last night?” Sarah teased as he came closer to her and her friends.

Jimin chuckled amused. “Came just for the coffee,” he said, pointing toward the coffee shop behind her. Then he looked at her friends sitting on top of a red sarong, with a shy smile. “Hey, how you doing?”

The girls greeted him excitedly, exchanging glances between themselves. Sarah was too invested to notice.

“Just for the coffee, huh?” she raised her eyebrow teasingly. Jimin chuckled.

“Are you going to the game later tonight too?” a short girl with bangs asked him, all smiles.

He looked from her to Sarah, as if waiting for an introduction and she quietly whispered her friend’s name to him. “Uh- Yeah! Are you going too, Sunny?”

“We are!” she answered excitedly. “I was just telling Sarah we should go earlier since I’m pretty sure the place will be packed… Anything for a good seat!” she laughed, and Jimin nodded agreeing.

“You should! I’m going earlier too” the boy added.

“Well, I still have to find someone to interview today…” Sarah sighed, looking around as if her savior would come.

Eliza, the other girl sat down, eyed her for a bit, and then shifted her glance toward Jimin. Sarah met her eyes and as soon as it happened she knew what was going to unravel next. She gulped nervously.

“You’re an athlete aren’t you?”

Jimin looked at the girl before even realizing the question was directed to him. “I am,” he said simply, waiting for further context.

Sunny looked at her too, expectant. Eliza then turned to Sarah. “Why not interview him?”

“Oh I don’t know-“ Sarah said hesitantly. “I don’t want to take your time or anything…” she added, biting her lips.

Jimin opened another radiant smile, looking at her fondly. He hadn’t expected to reach the coffee shop anyways, her company was all that he had been hoping for.

Not knowing what the interview would even be about, Jimin answered. “It would be a pleasure to be interviewed by the infamous Sarah Lewis,” he added a wink at the end and the girl melted under his gaze.

The blonde said quick goodbyes to her two friends, with promises of being as speedy with the interview as she could so they could meet early to attend the game. Meanwhile, the jock could only hope to extend their time together, after all, they did have some pending business.

Jungkook was pretty nervous. He was in the locker room, sat down together with his team, all waiting for the game to begin while their coach kept giving last advice and cheering them on. And although Jungkook very much liked the “old man” as he would call him, he had been listening to none of the words leaving Mr. Hoffman’s mouth. His only focus was the loud cheering he could hear from outside and the way their benches would shake from the crowd’s loud stomps. From what he could tell, the bleachers of the inside court were already packed, and he was right.

Jimin was the first of his group of friends to arrive, and because of that, he was having some trouble safeguarding the seats for everyone. He was trying hard to balance out a rather large beer cup on his hands—that was already half empty—while his left leg was up to the side, on top of two seats, and his jacket on the other one by his right, as well as the cardboard piece he had made earlier that afternoon to support Jungkook.

The more crowded the place got, the more he was finding it hard to keep the seats since they were definitely in the best spot to watch the game; courtesy of Jungkook who had given him the tip. The number of people trying to sit there just for him to say “I’m sorry it’s occupied”, especially the bad-mouthing session that came right after it, was proving to be a challenging task to his patience.

He was about to curse someone himself, mentally blaming his friends for running late, once he heard Deo’s voice calling for him.

“Chims!”, she did her best to get noticed by everyone passing by. “Down here!!”

He took a second to spot her arms, waving the best she could as the place was very much full of people trying to accommodate themselves on their seats.

“Come quickly!” he screamed back, caving into a full smile, “My leg is numb!”

That was the thing about Jimin, he could get grumpy and emotional, or sometimes really mad, but he couldn’t do so for long. And if he were to be honest, he was always the one running late inside his circle of friends. Today had just been the exception thanks to a gorgeous blue-eyed girl.

“I thought I was going to lose a leg,” he sighed taking down his limb off the seats as Deo and Hoseok approached him to sit down, “I mean, I’m great at doing splits but this was just too long of a torture!”

“Stop being dramatic,” Deo cut him off. “It was only fifteen minutes.”

Hoseok laughed out, partially guilty while accommodating himself on his seat, “It was way more, and you know it!”

The blonde one lifted his hand to point it at Hoseok, clapping it down again on his leg, happy for having someone side with him. “Thank you!”

“Wanna die?” Deo intervened quickly with a look making her friend raise his hands in defeat as she bit down a smile. “Where’s Hyori by the way?” she asked, looking around.

“Texted me a while ago saying she was just changing to come…”

Hoseok took the cup from Jimin’s hand taking a quick sip, “Still? I dropped her off at the dorms hours ago!”

Deo’s eyes quickly left the court to question Hoseok about her roommate. It wasn’t of Hyori to arrive late, much less to dwell so heavily on getting ready. “And you’re sure she went to our dorm?”

“Mmhm, I’m sure.”

Hoseok was clueless about the worrying state Deo immediately had gotten in. The sunshine of the group munched on some red gummies, sugar-coated, as his eyes scanned the volley court. With each second, more and more people were arriving and it was certain that there weren’t going to be enough places for everyone.

“There she is!” Jimin pointed out to the entrance on the other side of where they were seated before the strawberry blonde girl could ask Hoseok more questions.

Hoseok squinted his eyes trying to look for Hyori among the crowd and as he found her, he got up from his seat raising his arms. “Wave at her!”

“There’s no way she will see you.” Deo giggled while searching for her phone inside her purse. “I’m going to call her.”

“Just shout her name,” Jimin added fuel to the fire getting up from his seat as well.

“Guys, oh my God–” Deo covered her face as the two were already up on their seats, standing high. “Where’s Jungkook when you need him…”

As the duo began to chant the brunette’s name, Hoseok began to jump, hands up in the air, trying to catch the girl’s attention. Jimin fell into a fit of laughter immediately, almost falling off his seat as his stomach began hurting. Deo already had her phone glued to her ear when Hyori hung up.

“She sees me!” Hoseok's strident laugh is heard all through the venue, as he looks proudly at his friends.

“Hope, you should try out for the cheerleading squad. That was amazing.” Jimin managed to say in between gasps for air.

Hyori had to strategically pick out a route to be able to reach her friends. And by the time she did, she was puffing, bag strap swinging over her head as she struggled to take off her jacket. Jimin, ever so gentleman-like, gave her his hand to help her sit as the other took care of the weight of her bag.

“This place is packed!” Hyori commented, eyes scanning the room.

“Hell yeah!” Hoseok cheered, “those suckers won’t know what hit them!”

The bleachers remained loud, people casually talking with their peers as they waited for the main attraction: the volleyball team, with Jungkook leading them out of the locker rooms. By this time, they were probably receiving a last-minute pep talk from the coach.

“Hyo, you look so nice!�� Jimin squeezed the girl’s side, making her slap his hand.

“Thanks.” Not knowing how to react to compliments, Hyori smiled, head leaning on the jock’s shoulder. “So do you.”

“Hey, missy, what took you so long?” Deo inquisitively asked by her roommate’s side.

“What do you mean? The game hasn’t even started.” Hyori replied coyly. If someone knew her was her roommate.

Scoffing, the cheerleader presses, a smile adorning her features. “And did you have time to hide the evidence or when we get home your desk will be covered in highlighter?”

Hyori furrowed her brows, eyes rolling instinctively. In her mind, she battled with her two options: keep being oblivious to her best friend’s questions or come clean.

She chooses the latter. “Is it bad?”

“Not at all.” Now eyeing the girl’s skin in more detail, the strawberry blonde compliments. “You’re at a pro level. Next time I need to do my makeup, I’ll come to you.”

“Deal.” Hyori turns her body to chip in on the conversation of the boys next to her.

“Is it for the cute boy from the texts?” Deo whispers, teasingly and laughs right after, noticing how the girl beside her stiffens.

“I–maybe.”

Hyori knew that Deo wasn’t mocking her but she didn’t want the boys to know. They would make this a more significant thing than it actually was. And that was precisely why she hadn’t gone to Jungkook yet. Deo had pointed out how their friend could smooth things out for Hyori. So she glared at her bestie, a look the other knew as half a plea, half a threat to keep her mouth shut.

“What cute boy?” Hoseok's head almost popped in between the two girls.

“Me, obviously.” Jimin smiled big, cockily.

“You are such a jock.” Deo snorted.

“Excuse me??” Pretending to be offended, the blonde boy protected his heart with his hands. “Am I not the cute bo–”

“LOOK! THERE THEY COME!”

The doors that led to the locker room opened with a loud bang making the crowd avert their attention to the players running towards the court. Both teams came to greet the audience from opposite sides. Jungkook passed by right under where his group of friends was, swiftly turning himself on his heels to look up and send them a flying kiss. They all laughed at his exaggerated expressions while doing so.

“MAKE US PROUD!” Jimin shouted loudly, making the other three by his side laugh hysterically, and even join the chant of Jungkook’s nickname a bit after.

The raven-haired boy couldn’t help but open a huge smile, even if he felt a bit embarrassed at the racket his friends were making on the bleachers. As soon as he sat down to hear the tactical moves his coach was about to suggest, however, he became serious and relentless. Almost like he couldn’t hear a single word around him but the ones falling from his coach’s lips.

Not long after, the team got up. The players gathered around their coach to put their hands together, shouting the college catchphrase “Fight On!” like they were about to go to war. Once that was out of the way, the front-line players formed a line outside the court, waiting for the host to call for their names so they could make an entrance.

“Here we go!” Taehyung exclaimed excitedly. A bucket of fries in one hand and a red and golden flag with the college insignia in the other; waving it proudly.

Yoongi couldn’t help but chuckle amused as he saw Carolina cross her arms; she was sitting right under them, between their legs. “You are really out to piss her off today, aren’t you?” he looked at the players running to the court but Taehyung knew he was talking with him.

“Pshh,” He scoffed, taking a fry to his mouth. “I’m not…”

“I'm betting two dollars that Carolina will have him trapped in the girls' locker room by the end of this match,” Jin said casually to Namjoon, bending forward to see him as they were separated by Carolina and Luiza who sat in the middle. Not satisfied, he took two dollar bills out of his pocket and started waving them.

The girl in question didn’t say a word. She was too pissed with what had happened earlier in practice to even bother taking her eyes out of the court. The thought of Jungkook failing all his serves played like a loop in her mind. Still, she couldn’t afford to think that way as the male team needed to win this game if they wanted to qualify for the finals.

“What am I even doing with two dollars, bro?” Namjoon questioned, glancing at the bills in front of them with furrowed eyebrows.

“Namjoon, sometimes you fail to see the beauty in capitalism… If you bet two dollars as well, we have four. The winner gets to buy a hot dog.”

Jin didn’t need to say much more. Yoongi took his wallet out, fishing some bills out of it. “I bet she will at least pinch him. You know that hellish pinch of hers?” He asked with a sufferable expression as if he could feel his skin burning just from thinking of it. Jin looked up at him.

“The sucker pinch?” The oldest asked while Taehyung ate his fries rather anxious while listening to their bets. “That’s a good one. How much?” he asked as Yoongi nodded his head. The game was about to start but the two were not at all focused. Namjoon, who was right in the middle of the trades, kept drinking his beer totally unbothered.

“Three dollars” Yoongi flashed his bills out, “One hot dog and a beer.”

At that moment, Taehyung scoffed. “She’s not pinching me, I’m like her bro- OUTCH!”, the boy’s hand went flying to his inner thigh in desperation, rubbing his burning flesh as Carolina laughed satisfied. Jin sighed, giving Yoongi two dollars and the latter immediately waved his hand in the air so the hot dog seller could spot him.

“Why?”, they heard Taehyung whine.

“Yoongi seemed hungry and you know, I like to help out artists… The music industry these days is tough”, she shrugged off with a serious face while Lu kept on laughing beside her.

Yoongi bit down a tiny smile that threatened to escape, ruining his usual poker face. Before the hot dog seller approached him through the staircase, as he was sitting at the end of the row, he blurted out words that didn’t usually leave his mouth. “Love you.”

“Love you too.” Carolina had said back without turning her head to look at him. She too was biting down a smile of her own.

“What about me then?! Your dear roommate, hm?” Jin twisted his body completely to face her side profile; her lips trembling, struggling to hold in the laughter. Gaining no reaction or response from her, he exclaimed indignantly. “People these days! She’s worse than the music industry, let me tell you!” he was saying to whoever wanted to listen as the others laughed. Not satisfied, he glanced to his right, and locking eyes with a random guy he saw the opportunity to complain. “Can you believe this, Patrick?”

There was a second of doubt. “M-My name is Noah”, the guy introduced himself awkwardly.

“Oh…” Jin blinked, and if he got flustered he didn’t show. “Nice to meet you. I’m Jin. Can you call that girl over there selling fries, please? I’m hungry as fuck!”

The boy beside him nodded, visibly taken aback by Jin’s behavior, and that only added more reason for Yoongi to burst out in laughter. “I can’t believe this guy”

“Hey Noah, ask her for one more bucket, please!” Taehyung added, acting naturally as if the boy in question was a friend of his and not a complete stranger.

“And to think I argued with my dad to defend my friends…” Namjoon said humorously, taking another large sip from his beer. Both Carolina and Lu glanced over at him, and while the latter chuckled, assuming he had been making a joke, Carolina knew him better than that. His eyes weren’t smiling.

She leaned back, waiting for him to look at her too, as Lu—who sat between them—was focused on the game playing on the court.

“What happened?” she mouthed silently as his eyes met hers.

“The usual,” Namjoon shrugged with a melancholic smile. “But not now. Maybe once I’m properly drunk I’ll spill my heart out to you.”

Carolina knew it was not the moment. Namjoon always talked whenever he felt ready to; on that, they were very much alike. So she nodded in agreement, giving him a bright smile, but holding onto that promise.

“GO TROJANS!”, she shifted her focus back at the game as Taehyung screamed from above her, getting up to wave his flag passionately, smiling like a kid. Jungkook had scored another point. She sighed, slumping on her seat, head leaning on Yoongi’s right knee.

To outsiders, it might seem she was supporting the other team, which was not so incorrect. It turned out she had been holding this childish grudge against the MVP of UCBL, so she was in internal conflict. Carolina didn’t want her college to lose, but she also didn’t want Jungkook to win. To her misfortune, the sport she loved so much wasn’t a solo one… Losing, here, wasn’t an option, and she knew deep down they wouldn’t.

The first set was almost coming to an end. The Trojans, Jungkook’s team, had already scored twenty points and the Princeton Tigers had a six-point difference to cover. Everyone in that court knew the Trojans would win. It was an easy game. But Jungkook was foolishly wasting all of his energy on the match.

The team's main player had been, from the start, serving with brute force; his attacks were merciless and he would run with all his might after balls that weren’t worth running for. So much so, that once he scored the last point, securing the Trojans the win in the first set, and everyone cheered loudly screaming his name, his coach had no option but to call him in.

“What are you doing, kid?” Mr. Hoffman asked as he came in sweaty, with a water bottle in his hands. Both teams had headed to their benches, as they prepared to switch sides and start the second set. Jungkook glanced around, with heavy breathing. “Hey, hey. Look at me! There’s no need to waste energy like that, you hear me?”

“Why not?”, he retorted out of pure spite. His eyes encountered the confused ones of his coach for brief seconds before resuming to scan the inside bleachers, chugging down more water as he did so. “You always say we must have that kind of competitive spirit.”

“And it’s meant to use it wisely, you twat! What happens when you tire yourself out and they begin advancing on us?! What then?”, the coach exploded. The grey man had to take a moment to breathe, his hand coming to his hip as he looked down to inhale. Mr. Hoffman was close to grabbing Jungkook by his collar and dragging him to the bench to teach him a lesson, but he really couldn’t afford to take his best player out of the game before the second set even began.

Jungkook tilted his head, starting to feel his blood boil again. “I know my limits, old man. My energy won’t end just because of this simple match,” he stated cockily.

“That’s why you’re not my elective captain for when Sean graduates! You don’t think straight.”

Jungkook finally looked at him properly. His jaw tensed to the sudden attack. “I’m your coach, kid. And I’m telling you not to waste any more energy. At the very least don’t make it seem like you need to give all of yourself to defeat them.”

“That’s not fun–” Jungkook huffed vexed.

“It’s not supposed to be fun, it’s supposed to be smart. So when we win this game our next adversaries—the Eagles that you sweat your ass so much to win over—are more mentally shaken thinking, ‘Wow that player didn’t even waste a breath on them’ you understand now?”, the elder asks him as if asking a five-year-old, verging on despair.

Jungkook dropped the water bottle on the floor. “Fine.”

The coach sighed while watching him march his way to the court, waiting for the referee to start the second set.

“What happened?” Hyori asked once the Trojans scored the seventh point in a carefree manner. “Why is Jungkook playing like he was playing beach volleyball with us?”

Hoseok squinted his eyes toward the court, observing their friend. The boy in question had his hands on his hips as he waited for Eunwoo to go serve. “Is he already tired?”

“No it’s–”

“Is he trying to mock the other team?” Deo cut Jimin’s explanation, turning to Hoseok for answers.

“JEON JUNGKOOK IF YOU DON’T START REACTING RIGHT NOW I SWEAR–” Hyori yelled, alarming people around her.

Jimin’s hand came to her mouth to shut her up. “He’s probably just playing lightly because they don’t need to do much to win against the Tigers, guys. Calm down.”

“But I mean… Couldn’t he at least try a little harder? It’s boring this way.” Deo added, and they all looked expectant at their friend who was preparing to jump.

Eunwoo made a perfect pass and Jungkook came smashing it with full precision. The referee whistled. Another point for the Trojans team. “He’s doing good, nonetheless,” The group of friends heard, and one by one they turned around to see who had made that comment.

It was Sunny, the girl Jimin had met earlier that day with Sarah. She greeted him with a knowing smile and he mimicked her actions.

The petite girl didn’t play volleyball but she had been attending the games ever since she started college. Hearing one comment here and there about how the players made their moves, made her understand more of the game. And she could talk with ease about Jungkook’s skills now.

“I think so too,” Jimin added, winking at her. Turning around to pick up the cardboard he had done, he nudged Hyori. “Help me out with this cardboard”, as soon as they lifted it up he shouted. “GO JK!”

Jungkook was the outside hitter of his team, his function on the team was to be the last one hitting the ball so they could score. Even if he exercised said job lightly, he still managed to make it look amazing.

The team had just blocked a counterattack from the Tigers, and the scoreboard showed the number twelve in red neon lights. Their rivals were still behind them, and at this pace, they wouldn’t be able to catch the Trojans.

The referee beeped and they all stopped. The opposing coach had asked for a break. The crowd cheered as they watched Jungkook run to the side of the court alongside his peers to drink some water and take the opportunity to hear anything else their coach would like to add as well.

“Any extra moves, coach?” Eunwoo, the team’s setter, asked with a victory smile.

“You know, they’re not so bad…” Ian, their libero, let his thoughts come to the surface. “They’re just unprepared compared to us”

“Don’t let that fool you. And certainly don’t drop your guards! Now– Keep it up, boys! You’re doing a great job.” Coach tapped their shoulders as a way of thanking them for the good work. He then proceeded to clap enthusiastically, gathering their strength before the time out ended.

“Be careful with that hitter on the left…” Sean, their middle blocker and captain, warned them as he dried his forehead, looking at the other team pensively. “The kid managed to fit in points in some difficult corners”

Eunwoo glanced at his captain, giving the water bottle he had in hand to their technician. “You think we should press his side more?” Sean didn’t give him an answer, however, just kept his eyes glued to player number twelve on the other side of the court. “What do you think, JK?” the setter turned to him, watching him drink water absentmindedly; eyes round and big, looking at the floor. Eunwoo knew him long enough to understand that was normal behavior whenever Jungkook had something stuck in his mind. “Hey! JK!” he punched his arm.

“Mm?” Jungkook looked at them waiting for enlightenment.

“He’s too distracted with Jennifer… She’s in the bleachers somewhere” Jeremy, came by teasing and the boy in question snorted.

But that wasn’t the case. Jungkook got to know of Jennifer’s presence there at that exact moment. No, his head was somewhere else entirely… It had been ever since he had witnessed Carolina with his History teacher last night in that alley. And earlier today again, when she showed up to practice with the ginger man.

Something about the whole situation wasn’t sitting right with him. And he couldn’t brush it off. That wasn’t something he knew how to do.

“Just worry yourself with hitting that ball inside their side of the court, Jeremy”, the raven-haired hitter countered, returning to the match, and making his peers laugh.

Their captain, however, got nervous with the newly acquired information. “The girls came?!” Sean asked, looking around with a hand above his eyes to shield them from the lights.

Eunwoo was about to answer when Mr. Hoffman showed up behind them, slapping the taller one on the back of his neck. “Stop looking for girls! Go play!”

The three of them muttered a ‘yes sir’ and jogged with a different posture toward the court where Jungkook awaited. Eunwoo and Jeremy shared accomplices' looks before taking their positions, making fun of their captain.

Having won the second set, and since the Trojans were once again leading the third one with a big gap, everyone started to expect a certain win. The boys were still executing elaborate game plays but more at ease. None of them were being forced to exceed too much.

“Do we still have to be here?” Carolina mumbled to Lu, looking bored at the match. “We already know they are going to win… and I honestly have better things to do.”

“Oh like making out with Mr. Benji?” Lu whispered with a smirk on her face, eyes peeking quickly at her friend before going back to a certain tall and tanned player.

Carolina’s breath faltered, and she snapped her head to her friend, waiting promptly for explanations. She didn’t tell Lu about Ben being a teacher… Yet. She had been meaning to, but she left the party with the man instead of going with her friend as they had planned.

Noticing the inquisitive glance of Carolina burning the right side of her face, Lu smiled, leaning to her side to whisper once again. “You know I’m his student, right? I have history of arts with him… And it’s been some days now that he tells us to read something while he grabs a coffee but he somehow always comes back half an hour later with lips way too red.”

The brunette lifted one eyebrow at her reasoning, not buying it. “Carolina, the moment he showed up to practice it was clear you guys were making out. And like I said, he’s really my teacher.” Lu laughed, finding the coincidence funny and her stubborn friend trying to hide that fact even funnier.

The oldest sighed, crossing her arms. “Fine. But are we going home or nah? I really did have better plans.”

“First of all, it’s the two last points. They just scored twenty-three.” Lu pointed to the huge scoreboard across the arena. “And I’m sorry to break it to you but we are attending the party for the boys. You already called off with me last night, so shut it.”

Carolina groaned torn by the fact she indeed had a debt with her friend. “Someone’s angry, how cute” Lu added, chuckling.

“GO TROJANS!” Taehyung shouted from behind them too caught up in the game atmosphere.

“Yeah, and that someone is me”, Carolina stated, glancing back with a scowl to the boy before sinking in her seat like a vexed kid.

Luiza couldn’t help but laugh, squeezing Carolina’s cheeks, maneuvering her head so she could focus on what she wanted to show her. “No, that someone is him.”

And she didn’t need to look much to catch hold of who the curly-haired girl wanted her to see. Jungkook was wildly running from place to place, making attacks way too angry once again.

“What’s his fucking problem?” her question came muffled, as Lu’s fingers were still trapping her cheeks in a light squeeze.

“I wouldn’t know… But mine is that one over there.”

Luiza set free her friend’s cheeks, slumping her shoulders with a defeated sigh. Carolina raised her eyebrow. There’s no way she is crushing over Jeremy, the girl thought. And as if reading her thoughts, the honey-haired girl by her side clarified the situation, taking the opportunity that Namjoon was focused on buying something to eat while chatting with Yoongi. “Sean”, she said pointing to him with her head.

Carolina’s expression lightened up excitedly, her mouth opening in surprise and her brown eyes doubling the size. “No way!”

“Shhh!” Luiza asked startled.

The girl before her still had a chirp in her eyes, as if she had discovered the best secret ever. And indeed she had. Whispering, she got closer to her best friend who had her cheeks in a shade of pink, “I honestly think he’s not a problem for you at all” and as Luiza doubted her with a glance she added, “Lu, I’m serious! He’s all smiles around you!”

The shorter girl looked at Sean once again, doubt all over her face. It suddenly subsided into a playful grin as her best friend nudged her with excited exclamations.

“What did I miss?” Namjoon cut the party, taking an absentmindedly sip of his newly bought beer. “Oh wow! Final point already!”

Jungkook was the one in charge of serving. It was their final point to score, and if they succeeded, the victory was theirs. They would qualify.

As he assumed his stance on the edge of the line and lifted his eyes to see the Tigers on the other side of the net, he knew he could serve the ball and make it to be an ace. But that wasn’t fun. It didn’t spurge him, and he knew he had attentive eyes on him, waiting for yet another unforgettable game. The court was silent and expectant.

The court devil, as everyone called him before ‘virgin boy’ became a thing, threw the ball up. His eyes were solely focused on it. Two large steps were taken, and suddenly he was suspended in the air. Jungkook made it look beautiful, easy even.

The crowd held their breaths as his right hand came meeting the ball, spiking it directly towards the arms of the other team’s libero. It was a difficult ball to catch, even if he had put less impact on the effect he had perfected within the years.

“NICE!” Jimin celebrated, seeing the ball hit on the libero’s arms but slip away to the side instead of going straight to their setter.

The outside hitter of the other team was as good as Sean had made him be, managing to catch the ball and restructure the game. He had sent it in a larger pass to his opposite, accomplishing an attack, even if it wasn’t the quickest ever seen.

“Shit”, Namjoon mumbled. His eyes were trailed on the game, afraid to blink. The beer glass he was holding was halfway to his mouth, still in mid-air.

Ian, the Trojans' libero, managed to catch the spike as he dove onto the floor. But the blow had been a strong one, so the ball pinched on his hand and went backward. Jungkook knew Eunwoo wouldn’t get to the ball on time, so it was up to him to make the counterplay. If he managed to get to it too.

But if anyone could, that would be him.

He ran with all he had to the back of the court, eyes up on the ball, glued to it. So much so that he didn’t know what was in front of him. His legs moved recklessly. People from the crowd started to stand.

Looking at the speed of the ball, he wouldn’t be able to do a bump, much less a basic pass to send it over to the net for someone to attack. In a last-minute call, Jungkook threw his body, reaching the ball with his foot instead.

He landed with his butt on the floor with a loud thud, and if the circumstances were another, he would have felt the impact. But there was no time. He glanced back to see if he had succeeded, and before even confirming it, he was already back on his feet, running to his position.

“Heavens!” Hyori gasped, worried.

“Bro–” Deo couldn’t complete the sentence.

Jeremy attacked, without much force due to the lack of precision on the ball thrown at him, but as always he made it seem effortless. As if the passes had been easily made from the start.

“I don’t think I can look anymore,” Taehyung sang the last word, drowning in anxiety. “JUST SCORE”

The Tigers received the ball again, but this time poorly. The libero had passed the ball right to the other side of the net, failing to secure an opportunity of attack.

Ian, in turn, received the ball like a feather.

The ball flew graciously toward the net and Eunwoo switched position, changing the ball's course and speed. He had arranged it to perfection for Jungkook to make a speed attack. A fatal one.

“JJK!” every UCBL student present was chanting together while stomping their feet on the bleachers. “JJK!” echoed in the air rhythmically. Every student but one. “JJK!”

Jungkook jumped high as ever, freezing time for brief seconds along with him. As his hand descended to attack, the ball was sent in the very corner on the end of the court, just like Sean had warned them about the Tigers hitter before. That was that hitter's signature move, and it took very little for Jungkook to perfect it, making it his own.

The ball went through with such force and speed that the other team didn’t even notice it. The realization came with the referee’s whistle.

Landing again on the floor, all Jungkook could hear was the chanting for his name and happiness overflowing through screams and shouting. But even amidst everything, his focus was elsewhere. As his teammates came to his encounter, celebrating their victory, he finally found what he had been searching for throughout the whole match. More specifically, who.

There she was with crossed arms.

He smiled smugly. And then he did what he shouldn’t have done. He started a war with a wink.

“That fucking asshole,” Carolina grunted. In a second she had sprung to her feet, making way through the crowd to leave the place.

“You guys go ahead, I’ll wait for Jungkook with him”, they heard Hyori say nodding towards Jimin.

Once the game officially ended, the players have long gone to the lockers, and everyone started getting up to direct themselves towards the exits, Jimin had notified them he was going to wait for the crowd to subside. He had agreed to go to the court and wait there for Jungkook—who was going to take a quick shower before meeting his friends.

Deo eyed her roommate suspiciously. In a fraction of a second, realization hit her. “We’ll wait for you three outside then…” a smirk was added to her features when adding, “Try not to take too long.”

Before the black-haired girl could protest, her roommate had already turned around, taking Hoseok by his arm and pulling him along. Both of them were engulfed in a sea of students.

“So…” Jimin started smugly, leaning on the railing before them. “May I know why I get the honor to be accompanied by the almighty Hyori who never once before wanted to wait inside a stuffed ambiance with sweat odors?”, he tried to imitate her voice as he quoted the last bit. She chuckled, giving him a soft punch to his chest and nodding her head.

“I’m just being a nice friend.” Hyori shrugged.

Jimin didn’t buy the act, however, and she knew that. Still, she was prepared to be evasive toward all the questions she knew he would start asking. Jimin has always had a curious nature, there was not much he wouldn’t know by simply pressing everyone until he got the information he wanted.

“Look the route is clear!”, the girl added, making her way down to the court first. Jimin followed suit laughing at her attempt to change subjects.

Hyori had barely touched foot on the court when Jimin pressed further, still behind her. “C’mon, spill it”, he whined with a smile.

She was about to give him a poorly made excuse when the doors to the lockers opened and Jungkook came by carrying his duffel bag thrown back cooly on his shoulder. But Hyori gasped at the scene she witnessed afterward.

Jungkook looked back, holding the heavy door long enough for Eunwoo to pass by. The scene seemed to display at a slow pace to the girl, but the commentary Jimin left in the air before the boys came closer made her snap out of it.

“Oh, so this is why…”

Her first reaction was to snap her head at the boy beside her, giving him a nudge, and making him laugh.

She feigned normality.

As they approach both of them, Hyori's smile widens exponentially. “There he is! Our superstar!”, and the moment she finishes her sentence and hears Jimin chuckle beside her she knows she made a poor choice of words.

Jungkook seems even more embarrassed, smiling with full teeth and scrunching his nose to the new title. Before the situation gets worse, the raven-haired boy gets closer to her shaking his hair and making water droplets fall all over her face.

“Stop!”, she cries. Her body is curled, trying her best to deviate from him. “Oh, my days, Jungkook! Stop being a dog!” she laughs and he stops.

Jimin and Eunwoo watch everything delighted. “We went quickly from superstar to dog.” Jungkook scoffs, pretending to be hurt.

Hyori doesn’t pay much mind to his complaint as her eyes lock with Eunwoo’s and he smiles adorably. “Hi,” he says making her smile.

“Hi!”

Before she gets the chance to say anything else, or try to extend the conversation, Jungkook interrupts. “Are we ready to roll?” Hyori shrinks as he’s not able to read the room. “You coming with us?” he looks at the setter standing next to him.

“Yeah come with us!” Jimin tries as he sees the girl’s eyes get full of hope. “One of the girls can go on our lap or something. We can make it fit on the car.”

There’s some hesitancy on Eunwoo’s part as he sees everyone glancing at him. He smiles, ever so polite. His eyes almost disappear as they are shaped into an arch; his lashes beautify the movement.

“Thank you but I already–”

“EUNWOO!” they all turn heads to see Jeremy far ahead with a hand up, trying to call for his attention. “YOU COMING OR NOT?” he shouts, tapping at his wrist as if he had an imaginary watch placed there.

And again, Jungkook isn’t able to read the room like Jimin had been doing, much to Hyori’s demise.

“We’ll see you there in a few then!”

Eunwoo extends his fist so Jungkook can bump it. “See you soon!” he glances at Jimin and then Hyori, “Bye guys!”

“Bye bro, and let’s celebrate the match!” Jimin says as the setter makes his way toward Jeremy walking sideways. A thumbs up confirming the proposition.

The three of them watch as Eunwoo is reunited not only with Jeremy but also with a cheerleader Hyori knew from Deo’s classes, and Ian, the team’s libero. They walk towards the exit with a cheerful talk that can’t quite reach their ears properly.

“Let’s go too then!” Jungkook says excitedly and Hyori sighs, glancing at him disgruntled. Jimin sees the exact moment she slaps the back of the head of their friend making him stop on track. He eyes her confused.

She doesn’t return the eye contact as she marches up front leaving them behind. “I swear you are so dense sometimes!” he hears the girl grunt. Jungkook turns to seek explanations from Jimin, but he gives him no answers with a shrug of his shoulders as they start walking again to follow Hyori out of the venue.

The music could be heard for miles.

Of course, nothing could top a football victory party but the ones thrown in honor of the volleyball team followed right after. No invitation was needed and no one dared to miss them. Even those that didn’t care for sports attended. Jeremy always took care of the parties for his team, his frat house acting as the place to be after every single game.

Yoongi scrunches his nose as soon as a new song starts to play.

Despite the music at the moment passing as background for his ears, he’s too picky to not react to it. Even if no one around him noticed the scrunch. Tonight he’s not the designated DJ, nor the designated caretakerㅡof Taehyung, of course, who was usually the lightweight of the group. Still, it was likely that a change in one of those statuses would happen. If there was one thing that drove him mad was the frat party music. And as for Taehyung, well, somebody had to keep him in check, and not always his friends would leave a party walking straight. He was definitely the one that held his alcohol best.

“And they introduced it like a pop tart?” Jin asked, mouth agape.

“Yes!” Sunny squeals loudly. “It was disgusting!”

“I would be scared for life.” Jin shook his head. “And I like a good prank.”

“Prank me with everything, just— don’t put vegetables inside my pop tart.” Sunny’s expression is serious. “Or I will sue.”

“Trust issues, man.” Taeha laughs out, making Yoongi grin by her side.

Jin’s dramatics are intensified by the light touch of liquor in his blood and a simple conversation about Sunny’s most recent appearance in Taeha’s podcast swiftly turns into a serious—and perhaps even, the most important conversation of his life.

“JK!” As quickly as Jin emerged in the conversation was how quickly he snapped out of it, his downstairs neighbor approaching the circle.

“How’s it going?” Shoulder bumping with the oldest, Jungkook smiles big. Looking around the group, the volleyball player nods to both girls.

“Great performance earlier!” Sunny speaks cooly.

“Thanks.” Jungkook smiles from ear to ear. “But what nonsense was that about veggies in pop tarts?”

Sunny chuckles, hand trapping a strap of her hair behind her ear.

“It’s for Taeha’s podcast.” Jin nudges his head towards the girl that was now deep in a conversation with Yoongi. “Sunny tried the worst-rated restaurants around campus.”

“Well, you kinda’ had to see it coming, then.” Jungkook laughs.

“Strangely enough… I was counting on maybe food poisoning. Never crossed my mind to be betrayed like that. Someone should close that establishment–”

The girl speaks seriously and both boys fall into laughter, only for the conversation to be interrupted by a tipsy brunette. “Let’s go dance!”

And as the popular girl that Jungkook immediately recognized as Hyori’s cousin, Harin, swoops in on her friends, the girls can only share some glances with the confused boys that were left mid-conversation. But they are quick to shrug it off.

“So,” Jungkook trails off. “Where’s the she-devil?”

“Carolina?” Jin laughs. For some time now he had been sensing something between those two and he wanted nothing more but to meddle with it. “She’s off somewhere. But I swear I saw her here already.”

“She was with Luiza,” Yoongi comments nonchalantly. “But you need to be careful. If she hears you…”

Both troublemakers smirk knowingly, leaving an intrigued Jungkook in between them. “Oh, I can handle her.”

“I thought so too…” Jin shakes his head, eyes glued to the floor as if remembering something traumatic. “I thought so too…”

The repeating makes Yoongi crack. “Their house is a battlefield.” he clarifies.

Jungkook smiles, not knowing what to say after that. Instead, he opts to scan the crowd of drunken people that danced in the middle of the living room of Jeremy’s frat. He had made up his mind and he intended to fulfill the task he had appointed to himself as soon as possible.

His eyes fall on Namjoon. The clumsy tall figure of his housemate struggles to move through the crowd, arms in the air as he carries two red cups and another one dangling dangerously from between his teeth.

“I hope that one isn't mine." Jin makes a disgusting face, mentioning the cup that was threatening to fall from the Dean's kid's lips at any second.

"I've seen you lick dirtier things," Namjoon speaks immediately after Yoongi frees one of his hands.

"Dang. What have you been licking, bro?" Jungkook laughs teasingly.

"Do you really want the answer to that?" Now is Yoongi's turn to tease. "Because if I were you…"

"Hey!" Jin pretends to be offended. "That was a one-time thing!"

The entire group stares at Jungkook to see if he had bought the antic, as for a split second he seems to be speechless. He begins laughing, yet again not knowing what to say or do, and everyone follows suit.

"Well, I'm going to get myself a drink."

"Find us later if you want a ride!" Yoongi offers.

"For sure! Hit me up before you leave and I'll meet you in the front."

Jungkook doesn’t waste time and moves through the crowd toward the bar. He thinks to himself that not only does he need a drink but he also needs to find who he is looking for. His head was spinning with so many thoughts he could hardly enjoy the night as he had been planning.

As he reaches the improvised bar, tucked on the farther side of the living room, almost next to the kitchen, he eyes his options. Beer wouldn’t do it for him tonight. He spots a brand new bottle of vodka mixed between the empty ones. Vodka it is.

The MVP player of the night had just finished mixing his drink—vodka with grape and mint, his new concoction—when he turned back, taking a sip, and spotted Jimin on the other side of the crowd.

Some people tapped him on the shoulder as he made his way toward his friend, all of them opening smiles and congratulating him for the game. He knew none of those people, but he still thanked them with his own kind of smile.

“There you are!” Jimin pulled him to a side hug as soon as he spotted him. Jungkook was quick to pass the cup to his other hand in order for Jimin not to knock it out, spilling the content, as he had done many times before.

“Where’s Kiri and Hope?” He asked taking a sip and eyeing as Deo rolled her eyes at something the boy by her side had said close to her ear. The boy was a friend of Jack, the girl's ex-boyfriend, probably annoying her to give him another chance. Or, even trying to have a chance for himself, as everyone knew how toxic Jack’s friend circle was, to begin with.

“Hyo went to grab booze with Hobi but you know him…” Deo answered, taking the opportunity to escape the guy by her side, and Jimin laughed amused.

“Hobi probably met some people along the way and aborted the mission,”

“We’re waiting for Hyori here in case she is trying to find us again” the girl added.

Jungkook nodded and took another sip of his drink.

He bounced mindlessly to the sound of the beat while talking to Jimin and Deo. His eyes still got lost in the crowd from time to time, searching.

“Gguk!” Deo tugs at the end of his shirt.

“There he is.” Jimin chuckles, noticing how Jungkook almost shook his head, waking up from the trance he was in.

“What planet did you got dragged to?”

“I’m right here.” The boy chuckled.

“You’re so off today.” Deo crossed her arms over her chest.

The usual annoying look that would be on the cheerleader’s face from Jungkook not listening to her was replaced with one that hinted at concern but also curiosity. Of course, everyone in the Hope Club was used to Jungkook spacing out. It happened all the time.

But today he felt different.

Even before the game, when the strawberry blonde girl had a chance to see him, he seemed off. There was this spark in his eyes… One that he would have whenever he was planning a prank or being challenged.

“You’d think that because you’re too sober now, Dee.” Jungkook acted cool. “Let’s get her a drink, Jiminssi.”

Ignoring the protests of the girl, Jungkook swings his arm around her neck, Jimin following excitedly behind the two as they make their way through the crowd and into the kitchen area.

A big marble counter was filled with drinks and the typical red plastic cups. The rows that once were stacked perfectly next to the drinks now lay scattered around the counter. Besides the last few that were still perfectly stacked, it was hard to tell which ones had been used and the ones that simply had fallen and were unused.

Jungkook takes his time preparing his friend a drink. Pretending to know about mixology, he plays with the bottles, spinning them between his fingers as Deo can’t help but fall into laughter.

“Thank you, barman.”

“Where’s mine?” Jimin whines.

“You have a cup in hand that it’s full to the top.” Deo rolls her eyes at the jock as he takes no time in drinking the whole thing in one sit.

“Now…” He stops, catching his breath as he licks his bittersweet lips, a smile plastered on them. “Where’s mine?”

“Coming right up!”

Deo giggles, taking the red cup in between her hands and taking a sip. Jungkook looks expectantly before turning to Jimin’s drink. It wasn’t a cocktail—far from it, actually. Just a simple vodka with orange juice. He knew how much the girl hated the bitter taste that some beverages carried, so he would always make sure they were sweeter. Of course, most times, that ended up with Deo drinking way more than she was supposed to, burdening Hyori throughout the rest of the night, afraid of puking and shocking her to death while complaining that the room was spinning.

“There you are!” A high-pitch voice startles the entire group. And it’s visible on everyone’s faces the mood changing in the bat of an eye. “I’ve been looking everywhere for you, babe!”

Jungkook sighs before forcing a smile on his features. The girl that had been standing with her arms around his torso now forces her way into his arms. Jennifer.

“What’s up?” Jungkook asks but wishes it was rhetorical so there wouldn’t be an answer.

“I wanna dance!” The pout on the volleyball’s outside hitter's lips shows how drunk she already is.

“Go have fun.” Removing his arm from her shoulder, Jungkook turns to the drinks on the counter.

“With you, silly.” Jennifer laughs.

“He was kinda in the middle of something. Not that you noticed.” Deo smiles but is far from a polite one, finger twirling with her hair.

“But Kookie always has time for me. Don’t you?” Jennifer pouts again, leaning on the boy. “And I have an idea of what we can do after,” The mischievous smile on her lips leaves little to no imagination to everyone standing there and as she leans to speak in Jungkook's ear, it becomes even more evident.

“What the—”

Deo’s disgusting stare is hard to miss and Jimin can’t help but laugh hysterically at the entire situation. Jungkook presses his lips together, a sign of apology for leaving his friends.

“Men are so easy.”

“Hey, hey!” Jimin lifts his hands up in the air, defeatless. “Is your drink not sweet enough?”

“Yeah, it is. But you’re making me sour.” Sticking out her tongue, the girl waits as Jimin finishes pouring whiskey into his cup.

“Do you wanna go dance, too?” Jimin swings his arm around the small girl. “We can see what comes out of it later,” he jokes.

Deo can’t help but laugh, eyes rolling at the stupidity of her best friend. “You wish.”

“Am I not good-looking enough?” Jimin cries, stopping in place.

“Hmm…” Deo turns to face him, index finger on her lip as she pretends to be deep in thought. “You’re too emotional.”

The girl giggles as Jimin's mouth is agape and his eyes widened to pretend he is offended and enraged.

“How could you say that?”

“Suck it, loser.”

Middle finger up in the air, Deo continues giggling as she runs from the kitchen and towards the music. She’s sure Jimin is following right after her and so she speeds up her pace.

The party was crowded. Fuck Up The Friendship by Leah Kate plays loudly and everyone in the living room dances. The smell of alcohol mixed with the sweat from the colliding bodies, grasping for touch as couples make out in-between moves, filling the entire room and setting the mood.

Deo gasps as her cup come flying off her hands, the impact hitting her out of nowhere. “Dude, watch where you’re go—” She stops mid-sentence, eyes reaching the face of the boy that had just bumped into her. “Taehyung.”

“Didi, are you ok?” Jimin comes rushing to the girl’s side.

“Yeah—” The girl takes a second to look herself up and down.

The content of her red cup that was now laying on the ground had missed her completely—or almost. The white converses she was wearing were slowly changing into a soft shade of orange and she felt her blood boil.

“It wasn’t me!” Taehyung’s eyes widen, and his hands shake by his chest, defending himself.

“Really?” Deo scoffs.

“I— I really wasn’t!” Taehyung looks to Jimin, silently asking him to come to his defense.

“C’mon, it could’ve been a lot worse!” The blonde jock tries to help but clearly misses his shot, gaining a stern look from his best friends.

“Whatever. The least you could do is apologize.” The girl rolls her eyes.

Deo turns to leave, only for Taehyung to grab her by the wrist. “It really wasn’t me. That guy—”

Taehyung turns around, ready to point to the real culprit of the situation he was in but no one was in sight. At least, not the one that could take the blame for him. Deo lifts her eyebrows, expectantly.

“I was trying to protect you.”

“Protect me?” Now the girl laughs drily. “What? Don’t tell me he had a knife.”

“He was going to bump against you.” Taehyung presses his lips together, taking a deep breath.

“So you decided—in that pretty head of yours—that the outcome would be better if you bumped into me.”

Logically, Taehyung knew it made no sense. But his intentions were pure. “Well, in my head, I was going to be able to reach you in time to avoid any collisions but he pushed me instead.”

“Gee, Jimin, you never told me you were best friends with Flash here!” The girl talks to the jock but doesn’t even bother to look in his direction.

Taehyung laughs drily. Licking his lips, he looks the girl straight in the eye before scoffing. “Would you look at that? Yesterday we were fuck buddies, now we’re like this.”

“What?!” Jimin finally wakes up from the conversation.

Deo is caught off guard. Of course, she remembers what Taehyung is referring to. "Excuse me?”

“You’re really going to pull the amnesia card on me?” he laughs incredulously. A hint of annoyance flashed through his eyes.

Laughing nervously, Deo crosses her arms. “Are you calling me a liar now?”

“You’re a terrible liar.” Taehyung lifts an eyebrow at Deo’s smile.

“Guys,” Jimin tries to intervene but he’s completely ignored.

“I didn’t lie!”

“Would you prefer the term playing stupid?” Leaning against the wall, Taehyung watches the girl closely.

“Do you insult all the girls you try to save?”

For two whole more minutes, Jimin watches as his best friends continue to bicker, the subject now being changed to something else that was bothering one of the two. It was exhausting, Jimin finally concluded. The two were so absorbed in their argument, filled with nonsense, that they wouldn't even realize if the house would start falling to pieces.

“Wah,” Jimin sighs exasperated. “You’re both impossible to talk to…”

The jock complains more to himself than anything, as both his best friends are more concerned to keep disagreeing with each other.

“Yes, Jimin, let’s go to a party with your best friends! It’ll be super fun, you will see!” The jock adds, dramatic as ever. He stares at his empty red cup. “I need more booze to hang out with you.”

His eyes travel to the pair in front of him just to state the obvious—they were still not paying attention. So he turns around and makes his way through the sea of people dancing in the living room.

Only a couple of steps separated Jimin from the drinks counter but he had to stop multiple times to speak to several people. If he had to be honest, he didn’t remember half of them. But that was one of the things that came with being the quarterback of the university. Well… That and being extremely attractive.

One drink after the other, one of the most well-developed skills Jimin had was his drinking. He could take it well. Mid conversation with a group of cheerleaders from the volleyball team, he comes to the conclusion that his red cup is, yet again, empty. Charmingly, he excuses himself from the boring conversation he had long lost interest in.

The bar is his destination, but as he walks, crumpled by the movements, he spots a familiar pair of blue eyes near the kitchen door.

“Sarah!” he greeted, coming along, and the smile on her face got even bigger. The boy who talked to her before was long forgotten, as well as the drink Jimin was going to fetch.

“Jimin,” The girl greets equally excitedly. “Twice in a day… I’m starting to think that the universe is pushing us together.”

After their morning encounter, and the quick interview Sarah managed to get thanks to Jimin, they had to say their goodbyes. The girl had received a call from her sister who was expecting her to grab lunch. Jimin had walked her all the way to the front gate and although they said their goodbyes with a “see you later” they knew it was an improbable encounter.

He is, however, somewhat dazed at the implications behind the blonde’s premise. His hand runs through his hair.

“Either that or you’re a psycho.” The girl holds a serious expression before giggling.

“So, what’s your gut feeling telling you about me?” Acting coyly, Jimin jokes. He licks his plump lips once again.

“I guess I’ll have to find out.” The playful smile that adorns Sarah’s face shakes Jimin.

It was as if he had been asleep and suddenly a jar of cold water had been dropped on top of his head. Filled with goosebumps, he feels cool at the sudden approach of the beautiful girl that he so much dreamt about.

He wasn’t about to leave her hanging, of course.

Leaning in closer, with fluttering eyes, they were only millimeters away from each other’s lips.

“Jimin-ah!” The sudden shouting isn’t enough for the drunken boy that engulfs his best friend in his arms. “I’ve been locking– looking everywhere for you.”

Taehyung’s voice comes out slurry as he keeps leaning on the quarterback. Sarah can’t help but laugh at the situation.

Jimin doesn’t know if he should be furious or just murder his friend right away.

“Tae, how did you get so drunk? You were good an hour ago.”

“I’m not drunk, I’m coping” he mumbled, prolonging the last word.

Sighing, Jimin runs his hand through his hair. He knows he needs to help Taehyung but the moment he’s having with Sarah is all he wanted for some time now. “Do you mind?” The jock tilts his head with apologetic eyes, towards his friend that was still in his arms, now making small circles in Jimin’s chest completely spaced out.

“Not at all.” Sarah keeps on giggling at Taehyung. He was so out of himself that he didn’t even say hello to the girl. “I know we’ll find each other again.”

Jimin can only sigh at the teasing comment the blonde has made. And as she turns her back on him, he hits Taehyung straight in the head.

“I can’t believe you.” He whispers under his breath, dragging him to the drinks counter.

Taehyung was in desperate need of some food and water. Jimin had his back to him, searching for something in the cupboards. Cereal is good enough. But the drunken boy didn’t wait as his brain was already intoxicated with booze and his body seemed to move all by itself.

Instead, he saw himself walking out of the kitchen through the second arch that led to the entrance of the frat. The party was still alive, and people would still walk in, either searching for friends or for having a good time.

He kept walking, caving a path between the crowd, without a destination in mind. And he stopped whenever someone called his name, introducing him to people he could swear he had never seen around in college. When that happened, he tried his best to feign sobriety, smiling from ear to ear and giving a side hug accompanied with an “It’s really nice to meet you!”.

Taehyung wouldn’t stop for long, excusing himself to go find his friends. He always claimed that they were waiting for him when in fact he was just trying to get out of the conversation before people realized the truth—he either had no idea who they were or wasn’t in a clear state of mind to interact as he should.

The last group he stopped by was because he saw the familiar face of a Youtuber he had been following for a while now. She would visit the majority of unknown yet hip places around campus, and thanks to her Taehyung had never felt without options to visit on the weekends.

“Yuna!” he said, approaching her as if they had been the greatest of friends. “You’re Yuna, right? From youtube?”

She offered him a smile, not so clueless about who he was, even though she had never talked to him before. Taehyung had a reputation… One well known amongst students and as he stood this close to her, she could confirm everything said was indeed true.

He was gorgeous.

“Hi!” she greeted with a chuckle. “Yes, that’s me!”

She was standing beside two other girls, and Taehyung presumed they were her friends. He waved a hand at them accompanied by a smile and then looked at Yuna again. “Do you know where I can find one of those?” he pointed at the drink she had in hand.

“We got some over there!” she turned back indicating the dining hall and Taehyung squinted his eyes at the scene unfolding before him.

Across the sea of people, braiding back and forth around the house, he could see a crowd cheering around the dining table. Carolina and Lu were dancing on top of it.

He didn’t say anything else to Yuna, just leaned on the shoulder of a guy that was passing by and went toward the commotion. “Hey!” he shouted before even arriving closer. Carolina wasn’t paying any attention, as she smiled loosely at the girl beside her, showing her moves.

Taehyung pushed past some guys that were by their feet looking up. “Get down there! Carolina–” He demanded, tripping on his own feet as he too was out of himself. Carolina just twirled around, eyes closed as she danced to the rhythm of the song blasting on the speakers. “Hey!” Taehyung shouted back at her attitude, now facing her back.

He knew for sure she had seen him. This was just her trying to ignore his demand.

Not wasting any time, he pushed forward, his hip meeting the edge of the table. “You’re getting down now–” He grunted as he looped her around her waist and pulled her down.

“Oh for fucks sake!” she exclaimed, not even debating much. Carolina knew the only fool crazy enough to pull her down from a table was him.

She had to lean on someone that passed by as to not fall, easily concluding the state of how drunk he already was. “That pissed already, huh?”

He shook his head. “No– No,” he swiveled his index finger. “No twirling on tables.”

Carolina eyed him and laughed. “Oh so you can dance to Doja Cat on top of a table but I can’t?”

He smacked his lips together with a funny face.

“You’re completely wasted, aren’t you?” she asked but he only laughed with a hand on her shoulder so as to not fall.

The girl began thinking about what she should do to him, scanning the room and looking for any sign of their friends, to help her take care of Taehyung. He needed something to snack on. At least until they got out of there and made a quick pit stop at Mcdonald's drive-thru like they always did.

She managed to drag him, as he shouted incoherent things or sang along on the way to the puffs she remembered seeing Yoongi and Jin.

Carolina placed him between Yoongi and the edge of a couch, making both him and Jin promise they would take a look at him while she went to fetch something in the kitchen.

The way there was rushed, but smooth. She wasn’t that affected by the amount of booze she had ingested so far. Besides, not mixing drinks was in favor to stay conscious longer so she could enjoy the party.

“Hey, Jer!” she shouted, spotting the hitter from the volley team. The brunette sat on top of a counter in the kitchen, munching happily at some cookies. His eyes fell upon her and he opened his classic smile. His right hand placed a cookie in his mouth before he waved at her.

“Do you have more of that for me?” Carolina said, as she came closer and looked at the cookies. Taehyung would like those.

“Uhm… I think we have some more in one of these cupboards–” Jeremy looked behind him, opening one of them to check. Carolina quickly opened the one on the side to check as well, smiling wide as she spotted two more packages.

The brunette held the door as she leaped forward to be able to reach and snatch the cookies.

“Jackpot!” she said making him chuckle. “By the way, good game today. You really improved your jump. The pool training was totally worth it!”

They laughed and he thanked her with a warm smile. Although he had a bit of a fuck boy reputation, Carolina had always thought fondly of him. He was a nice guy, the nicest if she were to think about it. And not because he had a hidden agenda in mind, but because he genuinely liked to be useful to people. If it weren’t for him, she would never be able to perfect her passes.

It was with him that she trained to be able to deliver quick attacks to the hitters.

Before she could turn around and go away, Jeremy looked at her. “Did you see the others already?” he questioned as to make conversation. “Eunwoo is around somewhere, I lost him… And Sean had been looking for you and Lu.”

“Where’s Sean?” the girl asked. A quick pitstop to leave the snacks with Taehyung and then off to make a good deed for her friend. Luiza and Sean were a couple she had never seen coming but at the same time, the more she thought about it, the more it made the perfect sense.

Jeremy pointed to the backyard with a nod. “Last time I saw him he was there with the boys… But I don’t know, I came to eat something to be able to handle the third round,” she heard him laugh but not a word sank in. As soon as she turned around to look at the spot he pointed, she saw Jungkook with a bottle in hand as Jennifer whispered something in his ear with a smirk.

“Alright, Jer, go easy on those cookies”, she answered with a smile, before tapping his leg, taking a bottle of Jack that sat on top of the counter next to him, and making her way to her drunken friend. Something crawled inside her skin.

After leaving two packets of cookies with Yoongi for him to tend to a drunk Taehyung, Carolina marched out to the second floor. She stomped her Adidas brutally as she went up the steps.

Reaching the second floor, one-third of the whiskey bottle was already gone, and her social battery was certainly drained. So much so that instead of talking to some random boy that passed by calling her name, she ignored him in the search of a quiet place to sit by herself.

“DUDE SOME PRIVACY” she heard as soon as she got fully inside a bathroom, locking the door behind herself.

“Oh, hey there!” Carolina greeted, feeling quite sociable once again, feeling the booze hit her. “The door was… open?” she added, pointing backward with a poker face as the girl sat on the toilet and eyed her baffled.

“Oh–” Deo concluded, looking at the door and then at the tall girl again. “Really? My bad,” and she resumed pulling some of the toilet paper to pat it on her shoes. “Fuck, it’s not working! Do you have baby wipes or something?” she eyed Carolina again. The girl was leaning on the sink, sipping from her bottle as she fixed her hair, looking at the mirror.

Her brown eyes didn’t leave her reflection. “Nope… But I bet Jer has something. Wait–” Carolina crouched, her bottle still in hand, as she opened the drawers under the sink to snoop around.

“What– Ah! Don’t! It’s–” Deo tried to stop her but it was in vain. She jumped to her feet a few seconds later with a pack in her hand, closing the drawers again with her knee.

“Here it is–” she went towards the strawberry blonde girl, handing her the baby wipes.

“Thank God, I owe you one!” she said while Carolina had her back to her, pacing around the bathroom. “Didn’t even think about rumbling through their stuff. Boys…”

The other girl chuckled understanding what she was trying to say. “I’m acquainted with one of the boys living here. He always has baby wipes to clean his shoes, don’t ask me why.” they shared an accomplice glance before laughing.

Carolina sat on the edge of the bathtub, taking another sip from her bottle as she saw the other girl resume her cleaning. “Hey, do I know you?” she added with furrowed brows. Her brain worked hard to place the face of the small girl before her with a name. “I know you, don’t I?”

“Uhm, probably?” Deo glanced up quickly to face her, returning her gaze to her sneakers seconds after. “I think I know you too?” she added confused, discarding the wipe she had been using in the bathroom trash before directing herself to the sink.

“Huh,” Carolina mumbled, slipping her legs into the tub and then sliding swiftly until she was comfortably sitting inside it.

Deo eyed her through the mirror while washing her hands. “You ok there?” she looked again, scanning her face for any sign of sickness. “Need to puke?”

Carolina laughed, turning her face and meeting her eyes through the mirror. “I’m fine.” she dismissed. “Thanks for asking though! I’m just here to relax a bit– Some people take me out of my right mind sometimes.”

“Talking about boys? Cause let me tell you! Boys are the worst.”

Deo turned around, with arms crossed, and leaned on the sink behind her. Carolina looked at the ceiling pensively and then sighed.

“For me more like– People in general. But yeah.”

There was a minute of silence between the two. They weren’t close, but there is a comforting sense in confiding in people you don’t actually know. So, as Deo eyed her, giving her the push she needed to come clean with her thoughts, all she could think was why not?

“Not that I think all men are stupid… I mean sometimes they are, but—” Carolina started with a sigh. “This one…” she grunted in the end. Her knuckles turned white as she grabbed the bottle of whiskey.

“What did he do?” Deo asked, her eyes sparkling as she made her way toward the tub. “We’ll get revenge together!”

“He existed. That’s what he did.”

The smaller girl glance at her quite confused but brushed it off quickly with a confident nod of her head. “I feel you.” she looked at the tub and then at the girl before her. She bit her lips. “Is… Tub relaxing better than regular relaxing?” but before Carolina could answer her question, she already had one foot inside, ready to take a sit too. “Let me get in there with you!”

Carolina quickly found some space to fit her in as well, pulling her knees closer to her chest. “It’s definitely better to talk about what angers you or sort your thoughts. Try it– What’s troubling you?”

They sat face to face, both hugging their knees so they could fit inside. Carolina still held the bottle, shaking it softly toward Deo as a silent question. The smaller girl refused it with a shake of her hand and a smile.

“So,” she started while Carolina siped it instead. “The problem is that there’s this boy… And my friend– my like. My best friend likes him but he just pissed me off, you know?” Carolina nodded in understanding while she ranted about it. “He’s so weird and his head is always up in the clouds… It’s so annoying.” Deo rolled her eyes.

“And… You like him? Or you hate him?”

Deo looked at her fingers, fidgeting with her ring, not knowing what to answer.

“Uh! I know! Or maybe you hate him but also like him.” Carolina added, straightening her back as she felt excited.

“Even if I like him—and that’s a big if—it just wouldn’t work. I just got out of a relationship and the last thing I wanna do is get tied down again. Like–” Carolina saw as the girl before her sighed and slumped her shoulders. “Even today he reminded me of something I said yesterday when I was drunk. Who does that? I just don’t think we’d match.”

“That sounds… Like an episode of the OC, bro… I don’t even know what to say, really.” Carolina looked down, trying to think. The only thing coming to her mind was now an image of Seth, one of the protagonists of the show. “Is he hot, though?” she gave Deo a cheeky look.

“The crazy ones always are.”

“Now that’s something I have to agree on. They are.” Carolina nodded her head confirming the girl’s theory. “Look at us for example.”

“I take the compliment,” Deo snorts. “Don’t you, like, wish— sometimes only, of course, that you were a psycho? Just so you wouldn’t care? And you could murder someone? And not even feel guilty? Cause I can barely roll my eyes at my friends.”

Carolina’s brows come together as she stares at the tile wall by her side, tilting her head. The conversation had taken a serious turn. She had to thank the girl in front of her somehow for making her forget the reason she had been so mad as she first came inside this bathroom.

“Uhm…? Not really…?” the tall one answered pensively. “I already go at them if they piss me off so–”

“How?” The question is vague but Deo looks aimlessly at the wall in front of her. “How do you piss them off without you getting pissed off first?”

“Uh… I do get pissed that’s why I get back at them…?” Carolina wonders before chuckling.

Deo laughs too, and why she doesn’t know. “Well,” she starts once the laughter subsides. “I think I need more drinks now,” she states, looking at Carolina’s bottle, and noticing how little there was left. “You coming?” she started to get up, glancing at the two-tone-haired girl.

“I think I’ll stick around a little longer,” she says, stretching her legs to fill out the space Deo had left. “Thanks though! And good luck with the dreamy guy from the OC!” she chuckles, seeing the smaller friend by the door, ready to unlock it.

“He’s not dreamy!” Deo shouts back with a playful smile on her face before closing the door behind her with a minor bang.

Carolina is left there to look at the ceiling. Her eyes flutter and close. Her mind trails off to the fact she forgot to ask the petit girl’s name. She laughs alone, remembering their conversation.

And then she snaps her eyes open. Chugging the rest of the content of the bottle as she remembers why she got there in the first place.

Also on the top floor of the frat, looking for the bathroom, was Hyori. She had sadly missed her roommate for just a few minutes.

When it came to parties like this, she was really shy and anxious, different from Hoseok who loved to meet new people and hold gatherings. She loved those, and she would drink the most, but only if it were between her and her friends. Like this—a party full of people she had never talked to before—was rather nerve-racking.

She still attended them, mostly because her friends wouldn’t let her stay at the dorms by any means. But every time the jet-black-haired girl found herself surrounded by drunken people dancing along to the loud music, she realized that the dance floor wasn’t her thing. Hyori would much rather take her booze to somewhere more private. Normally, her eligible choice was the backyard, but sometime, when she was lucky enough, she would find a nice room. One with a window large enough so she could drink quietly while peeking at the moon.

The rooftop was one of Hyori’s favorite spots to be at a party like the one happening right now. And as she opened door to door, searching for a bathroom so she could have a glance at herself in the mirror, she found her safe haven instead. After receiving many complaints from couples that forgot to lock themselves before diving into a more passionate business, she finally sighed in relief.

The girl was a huge fan of the space and everything related to it. On busy nights, when people danced and tumbled around, she would always choose to stay there; sitting with her legs close to her chest, eyes fixed on the twinkling stars, her lonely drink in hand, and a lot on her mind.

Everything felt perfectly in place. She closed her eyes with a wistful smile on her face.

That was until she heard a loud thud coming from the door. She opened her eyes in a second, head snapping toward the sound.

A boy’s head came into vision, and he froze, meeting her gaze. Hyori couldn’t exactly tell who it was because of the light until he spoke. “Uh– Sorry! I didn’t mean to interrupt”

Namjoon.

She remembered his embarrassed tone from the previous night, on the backstage at the runway show. The smile returned to her face.

He mentioned closing the door again. “No!” Hyori protested hurriedly and he stopped in his tracks, peeking back at her. Suddenly the thought of him wanting to use the room for other purposes hit her and she felt the blood rush to her cheeks. “I– I can go. I’ll go so you can use the room–”

As she started moving towards the window to get inside the house again, Namjoon got behind the door, getting inside rushed. He closed the door behind him and started waving his free hand.

“No, no! It’s ok!” he explained hurriedly, his eyes nervously unfocused as he realized what she was implying by ‘using the room’. “I was just looking for my friend! Maybe you saw him?”

Hyori stopped to look at him. Her legs waggled in the air as she sat on the windowsill facing him.

“Maybe I was too distracted,” she chuckled shyly. “But uhm… I don’t think anybody came in.”

She saw Namjoon bite a smile down. “Tall, drunk… Maybe a tie wrapped on his head? He always does that.” It was his time to chuckle as he heard her laugh. “Taehyung is his name.”

“Jimin’s friend?”

“Oh, shit. Yeah!” Namjoon said apologetically with a boyish grin. His free hand came to the back of his neck, rubbing it distractedly. “I forgot you know him.” They chuckled again.

She nodded her head. “But no, sorry! I’d love to help but I really didn’t see him”, she noticed how his shoulders sank slowly. The thought of Namjoon searching for Taehyung around the frat for too long of a time crossed her mind. She felt silly, but she wished she could have helped him somehow. “But if I see him I’ll let him know you’re looking for him!”

He smiled, and she caught a glimpse of his dimple, carved on his skin just like the half moon shining brightly in the sky.

“Thanks! That’s a big help!”, he said and they kept their eyes on each other. Normally silent situations made her uncomfortable but staring at his dark hazy eyes, the lack of dialogue seemed natural. She bit her lower lip intrigued. His eyes met the action. “Then– Uhm… I’ll go then.” He looked at her eyes again. “I really have to find him.”

“Wait!” Hyori burst, before he could pass through the door he had already opened.

“What should I do if I find him?” Hyori spoke fast and despite not being drunk, her speech came out slurry. “Should we set up a place to meet in like an hour or something?”

“Oh… of course!” Namjoon laughed shyly. Whatever had crossed his mind was long gone and his long shoulders were now relaxed. “What if… Hum… I can give you my number— We could exchange numbers?”

“Oh…” Hyori's slightly pouted lips made Namjoon feel butterflies in his stomach. “Good idea!”

Both pull out their phones at the same time and the struggle to find each other's free hand to make the exchange of the device would seem awkward to anyone watching. But there was no one there besides Hyori, Namjoon, and the moon. So she found it endearing and the boy ended up laughing right after a shy giggle left the smart girl's lips.

With promises to text the other as soon as they found the tie deranged boy, they lingered on each other's stares before one going left and the other right, to the bottom floor, their hearts beating fast as if they had been running on adrenaline.

Jungkook fishes his phone on the back of his trousers as he makes his way toward the entrance. He can see the first rays of sunshine hitting the windows and denouncing the party is in its last stages. And since the place is not so crowded anymore, he makes his way swiftly, phone in hand, ready to check up on Yoongi to see if he can score a ride home.

Instead, his motions come to a halt, as he spots who he had been looking for all along.

Carolina had her back to him, arms crossed as she looked to the side absentmindedly. The way she frowned as the sun came in contact with her eyes made him start walking again. A groovy tune fell from his lips in the form of a whistle as he came closer in a jolly mood.

“There you are!” The smile on the boy’s lips goes all the way up to his eyes. “I know it’s already the day after, but I think you’re still in time to congratulate me on the big win.”

The girl raises one eyebrow before he even comes into vision. She breathes deeply, and as he approaches her, a sarcastic smile is already shining on her lips. It had been ready for him.

“Oh, so that’s how much importance I have in your life, huh?” she says with a feign cockiness, just to push his buttons. “Didn’t know you liked me that much, virgin boy”

Carolina keeps looking ahead, too proud to spare him a glance. But he waits until she does, with a lack of response on his part. And as she turned her head to the side, to check if he was there and not just a mirage she made up in her mind, she caught herself staring at his big dark eyes.

Only then does he answer, “Nah. I just wanted to rub the victory on your face”

She snorts amused.

There was an agreeable silence between the two. Jungkook looked expectantly at the two-tone-haired girl before him. She returned the gaze trying to decide what was going to be her next move.

The thought of taking it easy for the first time ever since she started this bickering dance with him came to mind. But then again, the mean comments she once heard him share with Jennifer about herself had cut deeper than she had predicted.

She pended her head to the side. “You won alright, but that doesn’t mean you played well. Your performance was poor, to say the least.” she rolled her eyes, clicking her tongue. Then she delivered the final blow. “Honestly disappointing.”

Carolina observed how his jaw tensed at her comment and she had to force herself not to show how pleased she was with his discontent.

Jungkook smirked. “I didn’t know you kept me in check like that”

“Eunwoo is too nice to do the job, so–“

“Eunwoo–“ Jungkook snorted with laughter. His hands came to his hips and he turned around pacing. When he came face to face with her again, his face had already adopted a mad semblance. “I’m starting to believe that you’re doing this on purpose” he added fuming this time.

That was the main problem between the two; whoever had a pair of eyes could see. They would always interpret differently what the other had said.

“Doing what on purpose?” she asked, raising an eyebrow, somewhat confused. But Jungkook took it as a challenge. And he had been piling up until now too many situations to bother on not to burst. He wasn’t intending on holding back no longer.

“You’re into Eunwoo too?!” he assumes more than he asks and she grins outraged. “What? Making out with my teacher wasn’t enough?”

Carolina was ready to laugh about his mistake over her snarky comment about Eunwoo, but she didn’t expect what came afterward. Her mouth opened and closed, piecing the information together.

Jungkook nodded. “Yeah that’s right, Mr. Benjamin is my teacher,” he stated, index finger coming to hit his chest. She furrowed her brows, puzzled by the sudden information and even more by how he was reacting.

“And what does anything have to do with it?!” she burst.

“I just don’t get it! What do you even see in the guy?!”

“You’ve got to be kidding…” she chuckles, placing her hands on her hips and staring straight into his disappointed eyes. He crosses his arms waiting for an answer.

“The question is what I don’t see in him” she spits and Jungkook feels his blood boil. He looks at some point by her shoulder before looking at her eyes again, tongue coming to poke the inside of his cheek. He exhales, doing everything possible to think straight. “And honestly, that’s very rich of you– ‘Cause Jennifer is superb” she snaps.

He blinks. The urge of shaking her hard by the shoulders to make her understand his reasoning flashes before his eyes. Instead, Jungkook stays still, his chest moving up and down like he’s restraining himself. His hands halt before reaching her face from each side, fingers curling into fists the second after, in a nervous outbreak. He grunts impatiently. Her eyes never leave his face, unafraid, and mostly, daring.

“What Jen–“ he starts.

“Oh save it!” Carolina snaps again. “I hate to say something like this about someone but I feel like her purpose range goes to making out sessions only. I doubt you both ever talked about something other than demeaning other people—which disgusts me by the way. So fucking shut it with Ben. He’s great to make out? Yes, the fucking best but unlike your Kardashian over there he actually has a brain.”

Jungkook clicks his tongue. And Carolina doesn’t know if it is the light breeze that hits them or the angered state he is in, but his eyes are glossy.

“HE’S MY TEACHER FOR FUCKS SAKE! YOU’RE MAKING OUT WITH MY TEACHER.” Jungkook didn’t bother anymore if someone could hear them. And he dared to say that he would like it if that was the case.

He wasn’t close with the girl in front of him, nor did he think of her as a friend, or even a colleague, but he hated every second of her relationship with his substitute teacher. He couldn’t tell why it bothered him so much but It was crawling under his skin and he just wanted it over with.

“How do you think that makes me feel?” he asked with a tilt of his head, in a pouty manner. His eyes were angrier than she had ever seen.

But he didn’t have the time to receive an answer, as for the second he asked, they saw a group approach them, snapping their gazes at their figures.

Taehyung had his arms wrapped around both Namjoon and Jin’s necks. Yoongi came right behind them with his phone in his ear, and suddenly Jungkook’s phone began to ring. Everyone stopped for a second.

“Are we going already?” Hoseok came out of the front door and Jungkook saw the rest of his group by the front lawn looking both at him and Carolina awkwardly.

Hoseok looked from one to another, trying to grasp why the mood was so dreadful. He even whispered at Deo and Hyori, but the shortest one nudged at him with a sympathetic look on her face.

Jungkook’s phone stopped ringing as Yoongi’s hand came down with the device, locking it.

The tension was palpable as Carolina didn’t move by his side. He didn’t need to look at her to see what was going on, as in front of them, Taehyung pierced her with his gaze. His eyebrows were furrowed, eyes drowning in confusion and—as Jungkook could discern—disappointment.

“What?” the drunken boy breathes.

“Tae–” Carolina tries as the trio comes closer to them.

Taehyung eyes her for brief seconds and the look she has on her face suggests that what he had heard was true and not just some mean gossip invented by the volley player fidgeting by her side. He knew her far too well to know when she was trying to come up with excuses.

“I think I’m gonna be sick” he has time to say before taking one hand out from Namjoon’s shoulder to place it on top of his stomach. Jin’s face contorts in disgust but he still offers the stability his drunken friend needs.

Jimin rushedly leaves both girls who had been cuddling by his side, being shielded from the breeze that welcomed the new morning, to go help his roommate. But he isn’t quick enough.

Taehyung mentions retching and as soon as he does so, Carolina grabs Jungkook by the arm, pulling him closer. The boy stumbles, trying to take a questioning glance at her over his shoulder. Before he manages to do it, his black boots are covered with vomit.

“I hope that’s leather,” Yoongi comments trivially as Jin holds a pale Taehyung by the shoulders, looking to the side as he mentions vomiting as well.

@singguks × @socksjinie × @bluenpjm

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daechwitatamic · 1 year

Text

IX. Heedless and Willful || KNJ

(banner by @/itaeewon)

Title: My Feet to Follow, and My Heart to Hold (Masterpost)

Rating: NSFW - minors dni

Genre: college!au, roomie!au, angst, s2l, the absolute slowest of burns

Pairing: Namjoon x female reader, unrequited Taehyung x reader

Beta'd by @/kookstempo, @/casuallyimagining, and @/toikiii - thank you endlessly!

Lesson One: there are such things as a right way and a wrong way to love and to be loved.

Things accelerate between you and Namjoon, but complications linger.

Section Warnings: language, kissing, groping, breast play/nip stim, fingering, protected sex, penetrative sex, multiple orgasms (f. receiving), multiple rounds

WC: 8k

The world is mine: blue hill, still silver lake, Broad field, bright flower, and the long white road A gateless garden, and an open path: My feet to follow, and my heart to hold. - Journey | Edna St. Vincent Millay

Saturday December 1st

The weekend brings with it a deluge of rain, a slow-moving weather system that has the streets holding inches of water, the road-side drains overflowing.

You stay inside all day, and so does Namjoon, but you largely orbit around each other, working on your own things, leaving the other alone.

Things had accelerated so suddenly between you that now you feel like you had slammed on a brake, inertia carrying you to teeter dangerously over an edge. You’re not sure if Namjoon is feeling the same way, but you think it’s probable.

You kind of want to tip over the edge, is the thing.

You work in your room, sitting at your desk, your bedroom door wide open. You’re kind of working, kind of watching water rush down the road below the apartment. It’s well after dinner, pitch black outside, but the streetlights illuminate the flow as the rainwater moves along beneath you. You’re having trouble focusing because of the rain - it lulls you to sleep, tricks you into thinking it’s bedtime. You can’t remember ever seeing rain like this, and the sound is all-encompassing, like you could wrap yourself up and exist within it.

You’ve just given up on focusing and closed your laptop for the night when there’s suddenly a huge boom from outside, loud and close enough that the floor shakes beneath your feet, and everything goes black around you. You scream, startled, and jump to your feet, knocking your desk chair over behind you with a loud clatter. That startles you a second time, and you scream again, clutching at your chest and backing yourself against your bedroom wall, heart pounding.

Across the apartment, Namjoon shouts your name, his voice deep and commanding, clearly alarmed.

The dark presses in around you, little fingers on your ankles and arms. You can’t see anything - not your bed, not the chair on the floor, not your hand in front of your own face. The silence is suddenly so loud it throbs around you - the sudden lack of normal noise toying with your senses. You’ve never been in quiet like this - no hum from the refrigerator, the central air system, your devices. All you can hear is your heartbeat pulsing in your ears, the angry, relentless sound of rain, and the echo of Namjoon’s voice calling your name, playing back and looping through your mind so loudly that it’s almost like you’re hearing it again.

You are hearing it again - his alarmed voice cuts through the darkness, calling your name with a little bit of an edge, a tinge of fear this time.

“I’m here,” you manage, your voice coming out like a gasp.

From the living room, you can see a small point of light coming rapidly closer, and then Namjoon appears in your doorway, guided by his cell phone’s flashlight. He seems a little out of breath as he pauses in the doorway, taking in the scene before him - you pressed against the wall, a hand still pressed to your racing heart, the chair askew on the floor, the rain pelting the window like it wants to break the glass.

Once he can see that you’re unharmed, Namjoon clicks his phone off, and you both let your eyes adjust. In the dark, everything various shades of black, his shape seems so large, taking up so much of your vision. He steps around the chair, not bothering to right it, and stops about two feet from you.

“I think a transformer blew out there,” he says, his voice odd, like most of his brain isn’t even aware that he’s speaking.

Two feet from him, your hands itch to reach out and touch him. Your feet beg to close the space between you. Your heart continues to throw itself against your ribcage, furious and demanding to be heard. The darkness takes its tiny fingers off your limbs, presses guiding fingertips to your back instead, nudging you forward.

If you’re going over the edge anyway, isn’t it better to jump than to fall?

Two feet from him, in the most profound darkness and silence you’ve ever experienced in your life, you find yourself nearly gasping for each breath as you fight your body’s every urge.

A line of St. Vincent Millay’s poetry leaps into your head, unbidden:

in me alone survive the unregenerate passions of a day when treacherous queens, with death upon the tread heedless and willful, took their knights to bed

Heedless and willful, you jump, crossing the space in a single stride. Namjoon’s hands coming to your waist like he was waiting for you.

He can kiss you only for a moment before he’s interrupted by you tugging his shirt up; he breaks away from you to pull it the rest of the way off and tosses it behind him, coming back to attach his mouth to your neck, sucking and kissing a line down to your collarbone. You run your hands along his chest, over his pecs, down his stomach, up his sides, your head thrown back to make room for him as he nips and soothes at your throat.

He groans happily as you dip your fingers towards the waistband of his jeans, then tugs bossily at your own shirt. You peel it off, dropping it to your feet, and move to kiss him again, but he’s busy reaching around your back and deftly pinching the clasp of your bra. It falls away, and you shake the straps loose from your arms, hearing it hit the ground. Cold air assaults your chest only a second before Namjoon’s large hands cup you, his mouth searing against yours out of nowhere.

Everything’s heightened in this total dark, total silence. You can hear every hitch of his breath, the thud of your own pulse, can feel every tiny movement of his hands, of his mouth. He toys lightly with your nipples, running his fingers in circles around them before plucking at them lightly, then abandoning your chest to run his hands over all the newly uncovered skin - your stomach, your back, your arms.

“You’re gorgeous,” he murmurs against your mouth. “I’ve thought so the whole fucking time, you’re so fucking gorgeous, I can’t think straight sometimes.”

“Namjoon,” you gasp quietly, half a reaction to his words and half a reaction to him gripping the waistband of your joggers and pulling them down over your ass in one motion. You kick them off and he walks you backwards to your bed, pushing at your shoulders until you fall backwards. You hear his zipper as he removes his jeans, and when he climbs up next to you on the bed you can feel but not see him straining against his boxer-briefs.

He brings his mouth to a nipple without warning, giving it one experimental lick and taking it between his lips when you whine in appreciation. You can feel yourself getting impossibly wet as he alternates licking and sucking, and his spare hand rubs circles down your body until he reaches the lace edge of your underwear, and he pauses. It’s the first time tonight he’s shown any hesitation.

He removes his mouth from your breast and moves back up where he can kiss you. His fingers skim the lace, a ghost of a touch, barely there.

“You good, baby?” he murmurs, so low, and you feel yourself clench - over the timbre of his voice or his cocky use of the pet name, you’re not sure. “Is this okay?”

“Yeah,” you breathe. “Touch me. Please.”

It’s wild how dark it is, how you can’t see anything on his face, can’t see which way he’s moving; the dark seems like it’s pressing in around you, like it’s the very thing shielding you from the onslaught of rain that you can still hear loud and clear.

Namjoon’s fingers skim over your slit so lightly it almost tickles, and you squirm, needing more. He presses harder on his second pass through, pressing the lace against your entrance. He moans when he feels how wet you are even through your panties, pressing himself harder against your leg as he swipes his fingers through again. Then he’s hooking his thumbs under the waistband and pulling your panties down your legs, cupping your sex with his whole hand.

“Fuck, baby,” he whispers hoarsely, and presses his middle finger into your heat up to the last knuckle. You suck in a breath, fingers curling in your bedspread, as he fucks you that way - middle finger only - for the barest of minutes before adding a second digit.

“God,” you groan, feeling yourself stretch to accommodate it. “Damn it.”

“Yeah?” he murmurs. “You’re so wet, what the fuck.” He’s right - you can hear it each time he pushes back into you. Your back arches, your body trying to press his fingers even deeper. When his thumb grazes your clit, you gasp out loud.

He swallows the rest of your noises with a kiss as he continues, and when the crest of your orgasm snaps a few minutes later you moan messily into his mouth as his fingers fuck you through it, steady and unyielding.

“Holy shit,” he groans when you clench around his fingers as the waves hit you. “That’s right, baby, fuck.”

You’re reaching for his briefs the second you’re back in your body, down from your high, and he pulls his fingers from you gently to help wiggle them over his hips and off his body. You slide your hand over him lightly and he hisses through his teeth as you wrap your fingers around him and rub him base to tip, sliding your palm over the wet head of his cock, using his own pre-cum to slick up your hand as you continue.

He’s hot in your hand, bigger than you’d expected, and you revel in listening to his light moans turn breathy as you toy with him. Finally, he grabs your wrist, pressing a kiss to your jaw.

“Should I go get a condom?” he asks, voice so low it’s almost a growl.

“I have some,” you tell him, rolling away from him and sliding your nightstand drawer open. You lay on your stomach so you can use both hands to rip a new one from the strip, and Namjoon rises to his knees behind you, one hand tracing the curve of your ass.

You reach over your shoulder to hand him the foil packet, and you’re startled by his phone light again when he turns it on so he can see what he’s doing. His phone lays on the bed, illuminating him from below, and you take a minute to take in how good he looks. You’d had no idea he had that body under his sweaters and baggy t-shirts.

He turns the light off again, the darkness surprising you with its intensity all over again. Your eyes are so busy trying to adjust again that you miss him moving until you feel his hands guiding you to lay back, his legs stretching between yours, his tip prodding your entrance as his lips find yours again.

“You’re okay?” he checks in a whisper, reaching down and squeezing himself at the base.

You kiss him in answer, pressing your core against him, letting your body tell him yes, I’m fine, yes, I’m ready.

He rocks into you slowly, an inch at a time, and the sensation tears a low, long groan from you. It mingles with his own; he breathes through his mouth in short pants, tinged with half-formed moans, until he bottoms out and he stills.

“Give me just a second,” you request, whispering, and he nods, running a hand reverently down your face, down your side, coming to rest under your ass, hitching you up slightly as he adjusts. You hiss as the movement forces him just a touch deeper as you struggle to relax.

He kisses you again, deeply and sweetly, and as you grip his shoulders and feel yourself relax, you start to move, little bits at a time.

“Okay,” you whisper, when you’re ready. “Thanks.”

He scoffs, like it’s ridiculous of you to be thanking him, but he starts to move. It’s slow, and even though you can barely see him you get the feeling that his eyes are on you. In the amplified silence, each breath seems to echo between you, each tiny moan or hitch of breath coming through loud and clear. You kiss sloppily, your hands exploring as he keeps the slow rhythm. His cockhead drags against you, the feeling agonizingly sweet, and you arch against him, trying to bring him closer.

The rain beats against the windows in waves as he fucks you slowly, like it wants in, like it has a score to settle. You press fingertips gently to Namjoon’s face, blindly feeling your way to the flat of his cheekbone, down to his jaw. Everything feels so intense, your fingers shake a little as they trace his jawline, reverent.

“Namjoon,” you whisper, and he answers you by sheathing himself completely, pressing his mouth to yours, and doubling the pace. He’s so large, it feels like he’s everywhere - inside you, around you, above you, everywhere.

You cry out when he finds an angle that has you seeing stars with each stroke, and he grunts, working hard to keep hitting it the same way. You lock your legs around the back of his thighs, trying to keep him close. You cling to his shoulder with one hand and tangle the other in his hair, holding tight as he pounds into you. When he feels you start to pulse around him, the beginning of an orgasm starting to build up, he actually laughs, once.

“Close, baby?” he asks, reaching down to press his thumb against your clit.

“Y-yeah,” you gasp, the feeling of electricity racing clear down to your toes. “Joon, please, oh - god -.”

He hums, pleased, and shifts you so he’s holding you up by the hips, the angle changing just slightly.

“Ohmygod, yes,” you cry, and the circles he’s been rubbing into your clit suddenly send you flying, your eyes screwing shut, a single, wordless wail leaving you as every muscle in your body goes taut.

“Fuck,” Namjoon hisses as you squeeze around him, dropping his forehead onto yours and gasping your name as he spills into the condom inside you. He pumps into you a few more times as your muscles relax by degrees, pressing a chaste kiss to your temple.

You lay tangled together for a few minutes, both breathing hard. Namjoon slips out of you gingerly and shifts like he’s going to get up. You kiss him quickly, before he can get too far, and he stills, letting you.

When you’re content, he disappears into the bathroom, dealing with the condom and cleaning up. He returns with a damp cloth for you, turning the light on his phone back off again when you’re done.

In the total darkness, he pulls you close. You rest your head against his chest, his arms around you, and listen to his heart. Despite the storm and the power-outage, you’ve never felt so safe. You can’t imagine ever feeling anything else while he’s wrapped around you like this.

“You called me baby,” you tease after a little while, and he snickers.

“It just slips out,” he laments, and you can hear the smile in his voice. “Sex makes me… affectionate. I have trouble untangling the two.”

You hum against him. “I think I like that,” you observe, and he hugs you a little tighter.

You’re starting to drift off when he says your name again.

“Hm?”

“I promise this isn’t the post-sex chemicals talking,” he says carefully. “But I wanted you to know. I think… I’m really falling for you.”

You press your lips together, wrap an arm around his middle and hold him close. Your chest feels like it’s caving in, your eyes suddenly burn, you can’t inhale.

Because you’ve felt it, too. And you don’t know what to do with it.

He takes your silence the wrong way. “You don’t have to - don’t feel pressure to say anything -.”

“No,” you say quickly. “I promise, it’s very much not that. I’ve… maybe been thinking the same thing. It’s just… scary. You know?”

He presses his lips to the top of your head. “Yeah,” he says. “It can be. But I’m here. We’re in it together, okay?”

“Yeah,” you whisper, tangling your feet in his legs, searching for a warm spot for your chilly toes. “Okay.”

Sunday December 2nd

The lights come on hours before dawn, your lamp illuminating the room in a yellow glow, your laptop dinging as it starts to receive charge again, your alarm clock numbers flashing 12:00 over and over again. You lay there, still, coming to your senses by degrees.

Namjoon is still in bed with you; you can feel his body, warm and solid, behind you. Minutes pass and it becomes clear by his steady deep breathing that the lights aren’t going to wake him up. You roll slowly, trying not to disturb him. He’s sleeping on his back, his face turned away from you, one arm flung up over his head. You feel yourself smile as you look at him.

There’s not a doubt in your mind that you want this, that you want him - wholly, completely, without boundaries or limitations. There’s not a doubt in your mind that the way he treats you - the way he gives you such openness and understanding, the way he listens and asks questions, the way he hears you and cares for you - is unlike anything you’ve ever experienced. When you’re with him, you feel like he’s by your side, like he’s got you.

And while Taehyung had been physically next to you for the last seventeen or so years of your life, it’s never felt like this.

You scoot closer, lining your body up against his side, and reach an arm over his stomach, pulling yourself as tight to him as you can and laying your head on his chest. In his sleep, he shifts, sensing the difference, the arm that was over his head coming down over your back and pulling you in. Then his head lolls back to your side, his eyelids fluttering. He reaches to press a kiss to the top of your head, and then flops back down against your pillow.

“Lights’re back?” he tries to ask, the words slurring together with sleep.

“Mhm,” you answer. “Do you want me to get up and turn the lamp off?”

“No,” he says, voice low and scratchy. “Stay.” Then he reaches over, guiding your chin up gently so he can lean down and kiss you again.

You open for him immediately, leaning up on an elbow to reach him better. It’s different this time - slow and sensual, explorative, relaxed. There’s no rush, no pressure for it to go further. His fingers run through your hair once, twice, then release it, skimming down your bare back instead. You realize with a shiver that you hadn’t gotten up to find pajamas in the dark.

He keeps you warm anyway, his hands roaming your back, your arms, your ass, your back again. You have a lot of things you want to tell him, but you save them, store them for later, as your body responds to his touch and you give yourself to him again. When he pants your name against your lips you feel the words bubbling up inside you, beating against doors to be let out, but you lose them along with your senses when he tips you over the edge again.

You clean up better after this time, waddling to the bathroom to pee and then stopping at your dresser to pull out pajamas. Namjoon hovers near your bed, clearly unsure if he should head to his own side of the apartment or not.

You scoff at him, like he should know better. “Get back in that bed,” you demand teasingly, and he listens, running a hand through his messy hair and looking around like he’s a little dazed, a little unsure of how he got here.

You click the lamp off and make your way back to him.

He wraps his arms around you immediately, and you eventually fall asleep matching your breaths to his slow ones.

Wednesday December 5th

I know my many failings I just can’t be the girl I should But I hope you know despite this In my life, you’re everything good

It’s certainly not good writing, and you have zero intention of turning this in for anything - zero intention of another living soul ever seeing it. But it feels good to put the words to paper.

You close the notebook when Gloria and another girl from class join your table. You’ve been assigned the task of workshopping your classmates’ portfolios as the semester crawls to a close, and today you’re meant to sit around and talk through your notes with each other.

“I want to go first,” you say immediately. “Gloria, you are out of your mind.”

Gloria beams, knowing exactly what you’re referring to.

“Catch me up?” the third girl, Sharmin, asks.

“Gloria’s entire portfolio is in iambic pentameter,” you tell her dryly. “Honestly, Gloria, I’ve got to know why.”

Gloria giggles. “Okay, okay - it really was just for the challenge. Like, it’s super great that poetry is all no rules but sometimes the challenge of saying what you’re trying to say within the framework of existing rules is… kind of fun?”

“I shall call you The Bard. Or maybe Bardess,” you joke.

The three of you move on to discuss the actual content of Gloria’s portfolio and then Sharmin’s - asking questions, noting lines you really liked, pointing out patterns and themes and hedging guesses on their meanings.

Finally, it’s your turn.

“Your voice is really sharp,” Sharmin compliments you. “I mean… maybe I don’t mean sharp. Clear? Crisp? Something like that.”

“I thought so too,” Gloria agrees. She pulls up a document on her laptop, referring to some notes she took. “I also noticed - and really liked - that while your topics were all different from each other, you had this recurring theme of life and death.”

You stare at her blankly. “I do?”

She gives you a sideways smile; it’s not uncommon for you two to pick things up in each other’s writing that you hadn’t noticed.

“Sure,” she says, and her finger goes to her screen as she reads a few examples, “Who would try to fight the tide, / the dark, the depth, the chill? That’s from your first one.

“Then, the second one: On Sundays I leave stones / atop marble markers to memorialize / those that you and I chose / to leave unturned. That whole entire poem is about a graveyard, so, yeah.”

“Oh! And your latest one!” Sharmin adds. “Where you’re, like, growing bones in your chest?”

You cover your face. “It sounds so dumb like that.”

But even as you’re speaking, other lines spring into your head:

Autumn leaves me hollow.

but my feet itch and beg to go, / into the night where the wolfpack hunts, / into the storm of wind and snow.

Nothing grows here that isn’t dead.

Gloria’s right. You do have a recurring theme about death.

You hadn’t realized. You hadn’t known you were weaving this single thread through everything you put to paper.

What you did know, the part you were aware of was that every one of those poems was about Taehyung.

You press your fingers over your mouth and take a slow, steadying breath. Somehow, everything hurts. It feels like you’re coming apart. It feels like your sutures have been cut too soon as you wrestle with this truth laid out for you:

Every metaphor you ever wrote with Taehyung in mind was somehow connected to death.

Like something inside you knew, long before you did, that whatever was between you was dead before it started.

Like something inside you knew that no matter how many words you devoted to him, you could never breathe life into it.

Like something in you knew the situation had a failure to thrive from the very beginning.

“And life?” you finally manage to ask through your fingers. But you already know every line you wrote about what comes next, about moving forward, about better possibilities.

If autumn can’t make me happy, / I wonder if winter might.

I know despite the dangers, / I can’t afford to stay inside.

This one, they say, will live.

And, most recently - that the girls hadn’t even seen, in my life, you’re everything good.

You didn’t need someone to point these lines out to you. You knew exactly what you’d been writing about - Namjoon, and the way his very presence seemed to represent the promise of something better.

–

You hustle home after class, walking so fast that you actually get your heart-rate up. Inside, you drop your bag on the ground and call Namjoon’s name, crossing the living room.

“Yeah?” he calls back, turning at his desk, but you’ve already entered his room, approaching him at a clip.

He’s got about a hundredth of a second to look surprised before you’re kissing him, hands coming up to cup his face firmly. He leans up to meet you, grunting with happy surprise, his hands coming to rest on your forearms.

When you break away, he smiles at you quizzically. “What was that for?”

You shake your head, indicating that you know your reasons are silly. “Because I wanted to,” you tell him truthfully. “Because I like you, and I missed you today, and….”

And you’re everything good.

“And I’m just… happy to be with you,” you finish lamely, nibbling with your bottom lip, a nervous habit.

He slides one hand down your arm and takes your hand. His smile softens from something teasing into something sweet, those dimples winking at you.

“Well,” he says, looking up at you, “speaking of how much you like me… you don’t have class on Friday, right? What about work?”

Friday is a day off at the university - some kind of training day for staff.

“Nope,” you say. “Kris is on, not me. Why, what’s happening?”

Namjoon’s hand goes to the back of his neck. “I, uh,” he says, a little bashfully, “I wanted to take you out. Like, for the day. On a date. I had some ideas.”

You press your lips together, trying to fight back the smile that’s breaking across your face.

“Yeah,” you say, your voice coming out small. “That sounds really nice. On Friday?”

“Mhm,” he says, his smile growing cockier now that you’ve said yes. “Wear comfortable shoes. And something warm - it’s supposed to snow a little.”

You’re still practically fighting the pleased smile off your face with a broom. “Okay, I will,” you tell him. You feel like you need to get out of there so you can squeal and hop around and maybe text Kris. “I’m gonna go change. Come hang out if you want?”

You tap his wall twice in goodbye and head to your room, closing the door while you change into sweatpants and a hoodie. You’re aware that he’s seen you naked now, but it still feels necessary. You text Kris as you change, and they send you back a row of exclamation points and a “#TeamDimples!”. You send them back an eye-roll and head to the living room couch.

–

[5:22 PM] Tae Bear 🧸: i’m going into the city friday to do some holiday shopping [5:22 PM] Tae Bear 🧸: you in? [5:23 PM] You: i have plans already :( i’m sorry [5:25 PM] Tae Bear 🧸: we could come back early [5:26 PM] You: my thing’s all day :( [5:29 PM] Tae Bear 🧸: ok [5:30 PM] You: sorry tete :( [5:34 PM] Tae Bear 🧸: it’s fine. dinner tonight? [5:35 PM] You: only if i dont have to walk my ass back to campus… [5:37 PM] Tae Bear 🧸: youre such a complainer 🙄 [5:37 PM] Tae Bear 🧸: i’ll pick you up

You chew on your pinky nail, staring at your phone screen. Do you need to see if Namjoon has dinner plans? Do you need his permission to go eat with Taehyung?

You don’t know the rules to this middle-ground you’re in.

But in light of everything you figured out today, you err on the safe side.

Namjoon’s in the kitchen, opening a beer by the sound of it. When he wanders back through the living room, you catch his eye.

“What’s wrong?” he asks immediately. You must look worried.

“Is it… um… Taehyung wants to grab dinner on campus. Are you - can - ?”

Understanding dawns on Namjoon’s face, and he comes over, sitting on the couch next to you and setting his beer on the coffee table.

“You don’t need to ask me before you spend time with your friends,” he says seriously. “Even that friend. You said you’re in this… so, I trust you.”

It’s such a simple thing, but it almost chokes you up. “Okay,” you whisper, so your voice won’t break. “And you’ll be okay? You can order or something?”

“I fed myself for years before we lived together,” he reminds you gently.

“Yeah, okay,” you say, feeling a little foolish. “So, I’ll see you after dinner?”

He gives your hand a reassuring squeeze. “I’ll be here,” he promises.

–

At dinner, surrounded by noisy groups of other students, you and Taehyung each pick at your plates, chatting in between bites.

Finally, as you scrape some sauce absently around your plate, he shoots you a baleful look. “I’ve really missed you lately,” he says, voice low.

Your stomach sinks. “I’ve been here, Taehyung,” you protest. “I didn’t go anywhere.”

“I know,” he says. “I know that. It just feels like we don’t talk as much anymore.”

You twist your lips to the side. There’s truth to what he’s saying, and you know it.

“If you want to talk to me, talk to me,” you insist. “Nothing’s different.”

He looks at you flatly. “You know that isn’t true.”

“I love you, Tete,” you tell him, and it’s the first time you’ve said it to him without feeling like you’re hiding layers, slipping secrets between the vowels. “I’m right here. I promise.”

He purses his lips, looks away from you. “What’s new with you?” he asks, finally. He must have been thinking about how little he’s asked you that, over the past few months, how happy he was to let you exist just outside his orbit. “Have you heard from Lin lately?”

You fill him in on what you can - Lin, Kris and the bookstore, even finally telling him a bit about your thesis work on St. Vincent Millay’s anthology. He tells you about a fight he had with Jimin, about how he almost failed a required biology class this semester, how his mom had the flu last week but is doing better now.

He doesn’t mention dating, so neither do you.

The guilt eats at you all night long, even after you’ve gone to bed. You lay in the dark, your stomach hurting with it.

You’re not sure if you feel bad because you and Taehyung aren’t supposed to keep secrets, or if it’s because you know you’ve done Namjoon wrong by keeping quiet.

Both, you decide sometime around two in the morning. You text Namjoon, “are you asleep?” He answers almost immediately, “almost. you ok?”

You brace yourself and send, “can i come over there?”

When he sends back, “please do” you grab your phone charger and make your way across the dark living room, lit only by the streetlights outside. You make your way into Namjoon’s room, into his bed, into his embrace. You fall asleep between his arms, feeling entirely like the least deserving person alive.

Friday December 7th

You follow Namjoon’s directions on Friday, wearing something warm, and sneakers. But when you head for the kitchen in the morning - he’d told you to be ready early - there’s no Namjoon in sight.

“Namjoon?” you call through the quiet apartment. “Hello?”

There’s no answer. You pull out your phone, ready to text him, when you hear footsteps and then the jangle of keys outside the front door.

Namjoon comes in sideways, shouldering the door open, a tray with two coffees in his hand.

“I tried to get back before you were up,” he says sheepishly.

“We have coffee here,” you say in answer, trying to catch up to whatever is going on.

He gives you a mischievous smile. “We have a train to catch. We needed them to be to-go. You ready?”

It’s cold out; you’re immediately glad for your big puffy coat and the scarf around your neck. You walk with your hot coffee in one hand and Namjoon’s hand in your other. The walk to the train station is only minutes, and soon you’re standing on the platform, peering in the direction that the train should come in from. When the wind picks up, you scoot closer to Namjoon, scavenging for body heat. He smiles down at you and gives your hand a squeeze.

When the train rushes in and the doors slide open, Namjoon lets you go first as you step out of the cold and head down the corridor, looking for two empty seats. You find one in the second car you walk through, and you slide over to the window seat. You both settle in, rearranging heavy coats and coffee cups.

“How long are we on for?” you ask Namjoon. He’s refused to tell you anything about the day, wanting it to all be a surprise.

“Around half an hour,” he tells you, and offers you an earpod. Quiet beats fill your ear as the train starts to move, buildings rushing past faster and faster until they give way to the browns and greens of less urban areas.

Namjoon taps your thigh when your stop comes, and you slide out and follow him towards the doors and back into the sharp, December air.

“Where are we?” you ask, as the train pulls away. Namjoon waves a hand at the train station’s sign, which reads the name of a quiet town west of your university. You’ve never been here before, but you know of it.

Namjoon leads you by the hand away from the train station and towards town. You spend the morning ducking in and out of little niche shops, a few art galleries, and one extremely cluttered antique store just for the hell of it. You talk the whole time - pointing out funny items, telling stories when something sparks a memory, joking and laughing quietly.

Around lunchtime, you stop on the sidewalk. Snow flurries drift down around you; not enough to stick, just enough to get caught in hair and eyelashes.

“What do you feel like eating?” he asks you, blowing on his fingers to warm them. “There are actually a lot of decent options along here.”

“Somewhere warm,” you joke, and he gives you an indulgent smile. Then he wraps an arm around your shoulders as you continue up the street, reading a few menus until you settle on a little cafe. You share a hot meal, watching the snow fall lazily outside.

“What else do you have planned?” you ask curiously, as you finish up eating.

“One more stop,” he says. “It’s the piece de resistance of the day.”

“Ooh,” you say, eyes wide. “Can’t wait.”

Namjoon pays and you zip yourselves back into your coats, heading back into the snow. He leads you, to your surprise, off the main strip and down a narrow side-street. A weathered sign swings in the winter wind, the paint so chipped and peeled that you can’t read it anymore.

He pulls the door open and holds it for you as you step through the threshold of the most beautiful antique bookstore you’ve ever seen.

“Oh, my gosh,” you whisper, reverent, eyes scanning the walls of shelves, the tables, the stuffed armchairs.

“I know you love books as much as I do,” Namjoon’s low voice says, close to your ear. “I wasn’t sure if you love old books as much as I do.”

“I do,” you breathe, running a hand just above the covers of the displayed novels to your right.

You walk together through the display tables, deeper into the belly of the shop. The register is currently unmanned, a little bell on the counter meant to summon whoever operates it.

“I have an idea,” you say to Namjoon, looking over your shoulder to smile up at him. “Let’s play a game?”

One of his eyebrows jumps. “What kind of game?”

A giggle erupts from you, and you try to stifle it. “Not that kind. Let’s shop alone. I’ll pick out three for you, you pick out three for me. Then we can meet back here in… twenty minutes? Or so? Then we can swap.”

Namjoon’s smile is open and wide, practically taking up his whole face. “I like it. Twenty minutes? I’ll set a timer on my phone.”

You go in separate directions as you browse. At one point you have six books in your arms, and you stop and set them down, examining their spines for which you should keep and which you should put back. The smell of old pages permeates the air, along with something Christmas-y - pine, maybe a touch of peppermint. You make your way further into the store, climbing a set of open, metal stairs that lead to a balcony of sorts, with more shelves at the top.

You can see Namjoon down below, crouching next to a shelf, his finger tracing the spines of the books on the bottom shelf, clearly looking for something specific. You smile softly, watching him. Then you bustle on to the next section you’re interested in.

When your phone buzzes in your pocket that your twenty minutes are up, you make your way back down to the spot you’d chosen to meet back up. You hold the books behind your back, smiling.

He does the same. “Trade on three?” he asks. “One… two… three!”

You hand him the stack and he hands his books over to you. You can’t help the smile that spreads across your face as you read the titles. You’d both done the same thing without knowing - one fiction, one non-fiction, one poetry.

“I think we spend too much time together,” Namjoon jokes, faking solemnity.

“Agreed,” you say, grinning up at him. “What do you say we buy what we want to buy and go across to that coffee shop to read?” You point out the window, eyeing the coffee shop across the street.

“I like this plan,” he tells you happily, and takes your hand to lead you to the register.

The coffee shop is a good choice - it’s got a fireplace on one wall, and you and Namjoon manage to score a small table not too far from the circle of warmth. Just as he had on the train, he hands you an earpod, and you spend several hours easily - chatting some, reading, watching the snow out the window.

You haven’t felt this at peace, this understood by somebody, perhaps ever in your life.

It gets dark early, making it feel late at night when it’s still early evening. Namjoon holds you close as you walk back down main street, back in the direction of the train station. Halfway down the block he stops, looking down at you, something warm in his gaze.

“What?” you ask. “Why are you looking at me like that?”

He doesn’t answer, just leans down to kiss you sweetly, his thumb stroking your jaw whisper-soft.

You’re sleepy the second you sit down on the train. You lean against Namjoon’s shoulder, eyes heavy. You’re not sure if you actually drift off or not, when Namjoon gasps beside you.

“What?” you ask, sitting back up. He looks back at you, eyes wide, clearly horrified. “What? What happened?”

“I’m so sorry,” he blurts out, eyes flashing to his phone and then back to you. The panic in his voice is evident. “Y/N, I’m so sorry.”

“What happened?” you repeat, feeling your own nerves start to tingle.

“I texted the wrong group chat…” he says quietly, still sounding horrified. “Fuck, I’m so fucking stupid. I’m so sorry. I thought it was the one with only Yoongi and Hobi…”

He turns his screen to show you. The groupchat is clearly the one with all the guys, the bubbles at the top numerous.

[6:02 PM] Hoseok: Namjoon you’ve been quiet all day

[6:03 PM] Hoseok: what’s the story?

[6:05 PM] Namjoon: took y/n on a date today to that antique bookstore 😊

[6:09 PM] Seokjin: wait….. taehyung’s y/n?

[6:09 PM] Jungkook: OOP-

Your stomach sinks. “Oh, my god,” you say, eyes on his phone screen.

“I’m so sorry,” he repeats, sounding pained.

“No, it’s okay,” you say automatically, even though it probably isn’t. You take a deep breath, rub a hand over your face. “He was going to find out eventually. And, honestly, I didn’t want it to be a secret forever, you know? This isn’t… this is real, it’s not a stupid friends-with-benefits thing, it deserves to… be.”

You trail off, not sure what you mean, but Namjoon leans forward, wrapping an arm around you and pulling you close.

“I’m still sorry,” he murmurs into your hair.

“It’s okay,” you tell him. “It really is.”

On your lap, your phone buzzes.

[6:12 PM] Tae Bear 🧸: wow.

Sunday December 9th

You try for two days to get Taehyung to answer you. He ignores text after text, call after call.

On the first day, you feel terrible. You’re sure he’s feeling betrayed, confused, hurt.

By the second day, you’re pissed.

[9:57 PM] You: taehyung, please talk to me

[11:08 PM] You: tete. please?

[12:33 AM] You: seriously, can you answer?

[9:41 AM] You: morning. Can we talk today please?

[2:12 PM] You: the silent treatment’s getting old. Pick up.

[5:57 PM] You: i’d LIKE to apologize to you in person but its kind of hard when you’re ignoring me!!!

[8:49 PM] You: fine, i’ll do it this way [8:54 PM] You: i’m sorry i didn’t tell you. I’m sorry you found out that way. [8:56 PM] You: for what it’s worth, we aren’t like…… officially official or anything [8:57 PM] You: it’s been heading that way, yeah, but…. not yet [8:59 PM] You: i think… telling you would have made it realer, and i didn’t know if it was real enough for that yet [9:03 PM] You: and if i’m being honest… i didn’t know how to tell you

[9:32 PM] Tae Bear 🧸: can i come over

Relief floods through you so heavy that you exhale everything inside you, eyes closing, head sagging towards your chest, the hand holding your phone going limp. Namjoon looks over at you from his side of the couch.

“He answered?” he asks.

“He’s coming over,” you confirm, typing in an answer to Taehyung. “You don’t mind, right? I owe him some answers.”

“No,” he says evenly. “I don’t mind. Do you want me to… I mean, I’m just thinking of when I talked with Elyse. Would me being there… help? Or make it worse?”

You let out a bitter laugh. “It’d help me tremendously,” you admit. “But I think it’d make it worse for him. Thank you, though. I appreciate the thought.”

“Okay,” he says quietly, and reaches out to give your hand a squeeze. “Well, you know where to find me.”

Outside, the December night is cold, but dry, the air tickling your throat on its way to and from your lungs.

“Listen,” you say softly. You and Taehyung are sitting side by side, a foot apart, on the stairs in front of your apartment. The stone step feels like a slab of absolute ice underneath you, but you can’t care about that right now. “I’m sorry it happened like this. I was trying… I was trying not to let anything change between us.”

Taehyung doesn’t answer, just stares at the road. From the side, you can see the tightness in his face, the clench of his jaw, the movement of his throat as he swallows. You’ve known him almost your whole life. You can read him like a book.

He’s hurting.

He’s trying to pretend he’s not.

“I mean,” you continue, your heart aching, “you never tell me about your girls.”

“That’s different,” he croaks.

“How?” you ask softly. “How is this different?”

“I wasn’t actually dating any of them,” he says.

It’s not the whole reason, and you both know it.

“So, what is this?” he asks. “Is he your boyfriend now?” He positively sneers the word.

This stops you. You don’t know how to answer. Technically, no. But essentially… yes. You just hadn’t talked it through yet. “He… I…”

Taehyung stands suddenly, shoves his hands in his pockets, paces to the curb and back. “Well?” he demands, facing you. The hurt is practically dropping from him, and you’re reeling to fight the instinct to make it better, reeling trying to determine at lightning speed if you’ve actually done something wrong.

“Not technically,” you whisper.

He stands there, surrounded by the dark, staring you down, his face more serious than you’ve ever seen it. You stand too, taking a few steps to stop before him.

“What does this mean for us?” Taehyung asks. His voice breaks on ‘us’. “What are we now?”

You reach out, fingers skimming along his arm, wanting to comfort. “Taehyung, it doesn’t mean anything for us. We’ll be the same as we’ve always been.”

You watch it cross his face as he decides to make you prove it, but you don’t have enough time to react before he’s doing the thing you’d day-dreamed of time after time after time - before you knew Namjoon. He’s closing the gap between you, his hand curling in the fabric of your jacket, his lips finding yours, searching for something that three months ago he probably would have found.

–

Upstairs, Namjoon can’t let go of the uneasy feeling in his stomach. He can’t get that day with Elyse out of his head - how his eyes had found yours and he’d felt steady, had literally felt the fist of anxiety loosen on his lungs. What if you needed him out there? Finally, he can’t take it anymore. He crosses the living room and peeks out the window, just to gauge how it’s going - he’s sure he can read your expression or your body language enough to tell if you’re okay or not.

He leans over, looking out, and the blood in his arms and legs turns in an instant to ice.

Outside on the sidewalk, you’re kissing Taehyung. His dark hair hangs over your face, where one of his hands rests. Your bodies are impossibly close together, seeming to meld into one in the shadows.

He stumbles away from the window, trying to get away from it, but the image burns in his brain. He makes his way blindly back towards his bedroom. His heart pounds, and he finds himself nauseous, his eyes suddenly burning like he’s walked through smoke.

“Fuck,” he hisses, punching his doorframe. Then he slams his door shut, and locks it for good measure.

He should’ve known, he thinks. He should’ve seen this coming from day one.

Elyse had made him feel stupid, yeah.

But it was nothing like this.

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I'M GOING INTO HIDING BYE!!!!!!! <3

love y'all thanks for reading!!!

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