imagine if the reason rob isn't wearing the tags in the promo video is because he lost them?? didn't he keep them I think he said in an interview. imagine we're all losing our minds over Dave returning but they've just been misplaced - id die faster than Dave did
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Dead Sexy 💀😵🩵 Updated!
An Umbrella Academy AU feat. Pathologist!Dave + MorgueRegular!Klaus
A/N: Yo! This fic just hit 50 subscribers so I figured I should probably update it. 😬 Apologies for being the world’s slowest writer. I humbly offer this chapter as restitution for my tardiness. If you like it, please leave me a comment. If you don’t, well, just keep that shit to yourself. 😘
Summary: Dave is a pathologist working at the city morgue. And Klaus… well, Klaus just keeps turning up.
Snippet from Chapter 4:
It sometimes takes a little while to rouse him. A breakfast burrito waved under his nose (Dave has started buying an extra one during his Monday morning commute) normally does the trick.
But then eventually Klaus’ eyes will blink awake and he’ll be back on the mortal plane; yawning, stretching, scratching and subjecting Dave to more of his incorrigible flirting.
It’s strange, really, how quickly they’ve fallen into a kind of routine.
Klaus exhausts the supply of wearable items amid the sparse and ancient offerings of the lost and found box during his first few visits. Dave invests in a multipack of cheap white t-shirts and picks up a dozen pairs of sweatpants and some worn shoes from goodwill so that he can at least provide Klaus with something halfway decent to walk home in.
Not that Klaus always turns up naked; he doesn’t. Sometimes Dave will unzip the bag to find the guy still wearing the outfit in which he met his end: a leather gimp suit with straws poking through the nostril-holes (breathplay accident at an orgy), rainbow ice skates (pond not fully frozen), purple parachute pants (parachute not included).
The more Dave learns about Klaus, the more of a mystery he becomes. He doesn’t appear to have a permanent address, but then never seems to be strictly homeless either. Klaus apparently exists in a perpetual state of couch surfing and bed-hopping - without any shortage of couches to surf and beds to hop into.
Klaus’ sexual exploits are one of his favourite topics, the stories all delivered with a nonchalant hand wave but punctuated with a knowing glimmer of the eyes, as if told purely for Dave’s benefit.
Dave would never admit that he occasionally feels the prickly fangs of something green-eyed when Klaus is sat cross-legged on the autopsy table, delivering yet another tale of naked debauchery. But he does sometimes give Klaus the smaller burrito as a form of punishment.
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Tagging because you haven’t told me to stop: @badsext @yeah-klave @softforklave @anglophile-rin @falloutby @merry-melody @neist @purblzart @maerenee930 @firstpersonnarrator @super-unpredictable98 @wcrmboy @spookyfbi @squishitude @courtneytarynofficial @mokolataddict @pickledbeefwastaken @love-is-dirty-baby @jender123 @vonkimmeren @narnianaos @sylvertyger @merrilark @faceache111 @rob-private @pietro-t1me @not-oscar-wilde @thislovelylife @falafel14 @allisoooon @kawaiic0mmunism
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Sad because I’ll never be as big of a Klave Stan as Cody Ray Thompson
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https://twitter.com/codyraythompson/status/1639732539022606337?s=21
CODY!!!
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Just 2 dead soldiers chilling at a football game as their Irish, immortal twinks soulmates, with absolutely fantastic cheekbones, roam the earth, trying to get over their deaths and the efforts they went to to prevent it, just hoping and waiting to somehow see them again :)
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I don’t usually talk or share things about actors on here, but I swear to god, Cody Ray Thompson is melting me down. I think I’m gonna start reblogging stuff he says about Dave, lol.
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Tattoo
A Klaus Hargreeves x Dave Katz fic
A/N: A sad slice of post-season 3 Klaus for @enklavefest. Thank you to @allisoooon and @badsext for your much-appreciated beta services. 😘😘
CW: A swift kick to the emotional nards.
Words: 2.3k
Snippet: The impulsiveness of the decision wasn’t out of character, especially when under the influence. It was not to be the first time Klaus would awake with the familiar sting on his skin and only a vague memory of how the new marking had got there. But Klaus had wanted to impress him with his spontaneity.
There was a wicked satisfaction in watching Dave’s eyes grow wide at his spur-of-the-moment exploits, his old stories: the time he woke up on a ferry to Norway following a weeklong bender; the day he stole a cop car during Spring Break; the coke-fuelled orgies at the statehouse.
“A spider? Or maybe a rose?” Klaus had waved his beer bottle at the designs pasted on the walls: anchors and swallows and hearts with scrolled banners underneath. “What do you think?”
Dave had chuckled in the way he always did - with a slight shake of his head and a shy smile. “If there’s one thing you are not, it’s a delicate little flower, soldier.”
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Tagging because relevant to your interests: @badsext @yeah-klave @gatoplanet @softforklave @anglophile-rin @falloutby @goldieknocks @merry-melody @neist @purblzart @quezadaas @santacarlahorrorshow @maerenee930 @firstpersonnarrator @mister-girl @allisoooon @cemeteryklaus @super-unpredictable98 @wcrmboy @spookyfbi @squishitude @courtneytarynofficial @mokolataddict @pickledbeefwastaken @love-is-dirty-baby @rina-cydonia @inspiremeandsetmefree @jender123 @vonkimmeren @narnianaos @sylvertyger @merrilark @spideyxalmighty @faceache111 @rob-private @pietro-t1me
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