coming of age horror films in which the monster and the girl are somehow one

mine // the vvitch (2016) // alexa thorn // joan macleod // hatching / pahanhautoja (2022) // chelsea g summers // ashe vernon // carrie (1976) // amber sparks // venetta octavia // cat people (1942) // richard powers // angela carter // raw (2016) // rebecca harkins-cross

i want you to eat me, maren, bones and all

luca guadagnino bones and all // chelsea g summers (vogue) how cannibalism took over culture // blythe baird if my body could speak //yves olade beloved // unknown // jeff buckley // luca guadagnino bones and all // leith ross we’ll never have sex // artuad the jet of blood

- A Certain Hunger, Chelsea G. Summers

Chelsea G. Summers, A Certain Hunger

if you like hannibal and haven't read a certain hunger by Chelsea g summers, you should. it's my current read, and hannibal is my current watch, and I see a few parallels!

review:

positives - so sharply funny at times. i really enjoyed how the scene on page would be a gruesome killing or her cooking human meat and then she would just say the funniest, most unhinged stuff ever. dorothy came across as very cool, detached and clinical which i heavily enjoyed. her murder plans came across as realistic to me, nothing too outrageous or hard to believe. the only part i'm a bit confused about is her claiming to be a psychopath and still falling in love? admittedly, i don't know much about psychopaths or just human psychology in general. negatives - i had the exact opposite problem with this than I've had with several others. the first and the last 50 pages were quite confusing or simply lacked excitement, the middle, however, was extremely interesting to me. the first 50 pages almost made me lose interest because of how clueless i felt, but i'm very glad i pushed through. just a lot of (and i mean a lot of ) talk of sex, it got repetitive after a certain point... in conclusion - 3.5 stars, i enjoyed it very much. i think i might give it a higher rating on a second read simply because i would have the added context.

We talk about love like it's an involuntary act. We fall into love, like a hole, a puddle, an elevator shaft. We never step mindfully into love. Love we seem to think, requires a loss of control; love necessitates that vertiginous giving over to gravity; love wants you to have no choice.

- chelsea g. summers

May the days be aimless. Let the seasons drift. Do not advance the action according to plan.

— Don DeLillo; White Noise

June Reads!

A Certain Hunger by Chelsea G. Summers — 4/5: a friend recommended this one to me as kind of a mix between Hannibal and American Psycho with a female protagonist which got me hooked. it definitely delivered on that regarding the plot and food-motif (?). the food descriptions were definitely very beautiful and the protagonist compelling. liked that she was telling her story from prison. only thing was that some of her inner monologue came across a little ‘girl boss-y’ at times which I found corny but maybe that’s just me. I guess you’re allowed to be a bit of a corny #girlboss when you’re literally eating men

The Hauntings of Playing God by Chris Dietzel — 2.75/5: this one was kinda meh? was very excited about the concept (last ‘living’ woman on earth left to care for her patients who’re all suffering from locked-in syndrome (ig?) left to make tough choices) but it just didn’t deliver. it got kinda repetitive towards the middle and could’ve done with some shortening for sure imo. also a little too kitschy in some parts for my taste.

I’m Glad My Mom Died by Jennette McCurdy — 5/5: even better than expected! I had high hopes for this one and it didn’t let me down! not only is McCurdy’s story incredible and gripping but she’s also a really talented writer.

White Noise by Don DeLillo — 5/5: read this for the first time last year and suddenly got this intense craving to re-read it; turned out I liked it even better the second time round! this one truly has it all: coming to terms with mortality (and failing badly), portrait of family life and marriage, critique of consumerism and modern life, there’s an airborne toxic event, it’s a great satire overall, yet its so earnest at the same time and treats its characters with such fondness and care; such nice structure of the novel too. would recommend this to everyone

Idol, Burning by Rin Usami — 3.75/5: short and bittersweet! a story of an obsessive fan of a j-pop idol; the way she devotes herself to studying her idol as the rest of her life falls apart around her — really enjoyed the contrast between her absolute focus and dedication to her idol and how she struggles in her regular life, school and work especially due to her (probable) learning disability. some passages really hit home for me

Severance by Ling Ma — 4.5/5: enjoyed this one a lot! liked how the narration went back and forth between the current “zombie” pandemic the protagonist is trying to survive (and the dynamic of her companions) and the years leading up to that point. it felt kind of like a coming-of-age story but in a settling into your adulthood kind of way? I liked that vibe and could definitely relate to it as well. also, always a fan of when stories give me the very beginning stages of apocalypses etc. the writing’s really nice too! def recommend

“I myself find serenity in accepting my fate. The unapologetically guilty woman sleeps soundly at night.”

— A Certain Hunger, Chelsea G. Summers

"A kiss is the beginning of cannibalism," said Georges Bataile, or maybe he didn't. I haven't read the book this quote is supposed to appear in, Erotism: Death and Sensuality, but perhaps I will. I suspect I'd find it interesting, though I don't know that Bataile's book would pass the prison's censors.

Chelsea G. Summers - A Certain Hunger

Our female friends, the close ones, are the mini-breaks we take from the totalitarian work it requires to keep up the performance of being female.

Chelsea G. Summers, A Certain Hunger

Books I finished in May 2023

Again, not a lot here but y’know.

Edit: forgot a book!

Super-Infinite: The Transformations of John Donne, Katherine Rundell, 2022

A book I just randomly picked up at the bookstore. I don’t know, I loved the Bill Bryson Shakespeare biography, and this seemed to be in a similar vein but more genuine than funny, which I appreciate. I was also attracted to the book because the idea of the renaissance man, concerned by all subjects of study, is always of interest to me. I’d never actually heard of John Donne, but after rading the book, I definitely understad why people write books about him. Katherine Rundell writes with such distinction and beauty about Donne, using excerpts of his writing and of other scholars’ writing, the whole book is a delight to read. You don’t even have to care one bit about John Donne to read it, I know I didn’t at the start, but I grew to thanks to the exquisite way Rundell tells us about his life. I recommend it ! 

A Certain Hunger, Chelsea G. Summers, 2020

This book I first heard from last year, bought it, and then proceded not to read it for a year. I just didn’t feel like it I guess. I finally picked it up because I had nothing else left to read at my student accomodation. It’s a book about a food writer who kills her lovers. She writes from prison (not a spoiler) and recounts how it all went down. I didn’t vibe with the overly serious food descriptions at first, but I got used to it as I read. It was kinda cool, it’s a contemporary setting too, and I don’t usually read murdery books, so it was a nice change of pace for me. I grew more attached to the narrator towards the end. She really grew on me, I found her a bit pretentious at first but she does show another more introspective and self aware view which warmed me up to her a lot. Basically, a good crime book!

Radical Intimacy, Sophie K. Rosa, 2023

This book was probably handed to me by the gods above. I say that because I read an old fanfic (here, it’s amazing (it’s also fall out boy fanfic be warned)) in like April in which radical intimacy as a concept is mentioned as basically relationship anarchy mixed with non monogamy and like sex and romantic gestures between friends. All of which I subscribe very very much to. I googled radical intimacy after reading it and immediately this book (which JUST came out) popped up! It’s amazing and basically full of everything I’ve always wanted to read on the topics of relationships (or all kinds)! It’s separated in chapters dealing with romance, sex, family, death, friendship under capitalism, and how relationships between people are the thing. As in the thing ever. And I could not agree more! Nonconformative relationships are precious to me and seeing them being spoken about so openly and true-ly was wonderful, especially put into perspective with politics! It’s like Rosa wrote my thoughts out (after doing some research and applying theory to them). I can not recommend this book enough!

i need an A Certain Hunger HBO limited series like yesterday bitch

This was a good read for the unofficial start to summer. I highly recommend it for all my pool/beachside readers out there. A little bit of sleaze and lot of intrigue, it’s a good time!!

Review: A Certain Hunger by Chelsea G. Summers

I think anyone would be intrigued by that cover, right? I had very little idea of what to expect of A Certain Hunger but I knew that it featured a female serial killer, a particular buzz phrase for me. So, I wasn’t completely prepared for what was to come!

Dorothy is a food critic who loves food as much as she loves sex. Both of these passions often take her travelling between Manhattan and Italy, living a really quite wonderful life. Now from her prison cell, she is finally telling her story of how she ended up there. 

Like the vast majority of women, Dorothy has had her fair share of belittlement at the hands of men. I was on edge every time she was alone with a man who had tried to assert himself as the dominant party in any way. Dorothy’s voice is perhaps the inner voice of many women -sharp, unforgiving and undeniably violent. I could fully believe in her as a character, which unsettled and excited me in equal measure.

There are some lengthy, verbose descriptions of food and ingredients. When Dorothy is actually talking about food stuffs, this is a real treat for the senses but my stomach churned when she used the same descriptors for human flesh. Because yes, there is cannibalism in this book. Quite a lot of it. So, be prepared for that should you decide to pick it up!

It goes without saying that there is a lot of blood and violent imagery in the book. The way that Dorothy delights in it is horrific and to be honest, it was so graphic in places that I started to wonder how Summers did her research. Is this what it’s really like when a person is killed so violently and if so, how does she know? 

There is a bit of discussion on the difference in treatment between male and female psychopaths. It’s true that women who kill draw a much greater fascination than men who do the same and it’s purely down to how society has been conditioned to perceive women. Women are expected to be nurturing, kind-hearted, selfless creatures while violence and aggression typically belong to the world of men. The idea that there are women out there who are emotionless, unremorseful and unpredictable is terrifying for some people, so women like Dorothy become true curiosities.

In some parts, it felt like Dorothy was giving other women (female readers) advice on how to get the upper hand with men. I got chills when it felt like she was talking to me because it was almost as if she sensed something in common with herself. It’s a clever writing device and it definitely made the reading experience a lot creepier.

A Certain Hunger is a well-written, engaging story that will make you feel sick. I’m pretty sure I can’t ever re-read it, which is why I can’t really give it a maximum rating. It’s a short book but it took me a while to read because I kept having to work up the courage to sit with Dorothy again for a little while. If you like books that thoroughly unsettle, then A Certain Hunger is a good shout!

A Certain Hunger - Chelsea G. Summers