#cephandrius maxtori
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Elhokar: It says here on your resume that you’re very creative?
Wit: Yes, Your Majesty.
Elhokar: And what exactly is it you create?
Wit: Problems.
#cosmere#cosmeme#brandon sanderson#stormlight shitpost#incorrect stormlight quotes#the stormlight archive#way of kings#words of radiance#oathbringer#elhokar kholin#wit#hoid#kings wit#cephandrius maxtori#midius#cremposting#cfsbf
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Cast your vote in the tags!
kandra, clone, or both?
#Cosmere#Brandon Sanderson#Hoid#Roamer#Dust#Wit#Imperial Fool#Topaz#Drifter#Wanderer#Lunu'anaki#Cephandrius Maxtori#Midius#Bearer of the First Gem#just tagging ALL his names in here
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Currently living for these two wobs:
To summarize, Hoid is a tricksy hobbit who has been legitimately hornswoggled.
#crempost#cremposting#cosmere#the cosmere#wob#wobs#Brandon Sanderson#wit#hoid#Cephandrius#Cephandrius maxtori#tumblr is trying to autocorrect that to cephalopods and I think that’s meet#dust#drifter#midius#Rhythm of war#the rhythm of war#row#Seventeenth shard#the seventeenth shard#the 17th shard#17th shard#Branderson#Zephyr’s rambles
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i think Topaz is my fave of Hoid’s names just cause its actually nice and its like the only one so far that hasnt made me narrow my eyes exasperatedly like “yeah of course thats one of your fucking names what else would it fukkin be”
#as opposed to fukkin cephandrius maxtori#like that blood orange gif#'god hes so pretentious. its fukkin hoid.'#cosmere
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@basket-of-radiants happy valentines day
template here
if anyone can come up with a pickup line from “Cephandrius Maxtori” they’ll win... why does he have so many names
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Adolin: Okay, next person to say “weird flex, but okay” is getting kicked in the spheres.
Wit: Preposterous boast, but alas.
#cosmere#cosmeme#brandon sanderson#stormlight shitpost#incorrect stormlight quotes#the stormlight archive#way of kings#words of radiance#oathbringer#adolin kholin#wit#hoid#cephandrius maxtori#cremposting#cfsbf
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Hoid: This was fun. We should do this again, just hang out and insult each other.
Kelsier: I am going to kill you.
Hoid: Eh, I’ll believe it when I see it. Same time next week?
Kelsier: …Fine.
#cosmere#cosmeme#brandon sanderson#mistborn shitpost#incorrect mistborn quotes#mistborn#the final empire#well of ascencion#hero of ages#secret history#kelsier#survivor of hathsin#hoid#cephandrius maxtori#wit#cremposting#cfsbf
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Amaram: Enough! How dare you mock me in such a manner!
Wit: Well. How would you like me to mock you? I take requests.
#cosmere#cosmeme#brandon sanderson#Stormlight shitpost#incorrect stormlight quotes#The Stormlight Archive#The Way of Kings#Words of Radiance#oathbringer#meridas amaram#amaram#wit#hoid#cephandrius maxtori#midius#dust#cremposting#cfsbf
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Wit: I apologize for not laughing, but that was a poor excuse of a joke, Brightness.
Navani: What’s even worse is that you laughed at your own poor joke.
Wit: I laugh at my own jokes because I am my target audience. You just happen to be here.
#cosmere#cosmeme#brandon sanderson#Stormlight shitpost#incorrect stormlight quotes#The Stormlight Archive#The Way of Kings#Words of Radiance#oathbringer#rhythm of war#navani kholin#wit#the kings wit#hoid#cephandrius maxtori#cremposting#cfsbf
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Kelsier: One of the many things that baffles me about Hoid is his ability to go unmurdered.
#cosmere#cosmeme#brandon sanderson#incorrect cosmere quotes#cosmere shitpost#mistborn#incorrect mistborn quotes#secret history#hoid#cephandrius maxtori#kelsier#survivor of hathsin#cremposting#cfsbf
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Hoid: You can trust me.
Anyone who’s paying any attention: I don’t trust the way you just said I could trust you.
#cosmere#cosmeme#brandon sanderson#cosmere shitpost#incorrect cosmere quoes#warbreaker#mistborn#mistborn era 2#elantris#the stormlight archive#hoid#wit#midius#dust#cephandrius maxtori#cremposting#cfsbf
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Shallan: Wow! You played him like a fiddle!
Hoid: Oh no, fiddles are actually quite difficult to master.
Hoid: I played that motherfucker like the cheap kazoo he is.
#cosmere#cosmeme#brandon sanderson#stormlight shitpost#incorrect stormlight quotes#the stormlight archive#way of kings#words of radiance#oathbringer#shallan davar#hoid#wit#cephandrius maxtori#midius#cremposting#cfsbf
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Hoid: I love sarcasm; it's like punching people, but with words.
#cosmere#cosmeme#brandon sanderson#hoid#dragonsteel#The Stormlight Archive#mistborn#Mistborn era 2#warbreaker#elantris#arcanum unbounded#wit#cephandrius maxtori#midius#topaz#Lunu'anaki#cremposting#cfsbf
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Hoid: Ah, Survivor. Did you miss me?
Kelsier: With every arrow so far.
#cosmere#cosmeme#brandon sanderson#cosmere shitpost#incorrect cosmere quotes#The Stormlight Archive#mistborn#mistborn era 2#arcanum unbounded#Warbreaker#Elantris#kelsier#Survivor#survivor of hathsin#hoid#wit#cephandrius maxtori#midius#cremposting#cfsbf
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Sadeas: Wow you're really campaigning for bitch of the year, huh?
Wit: As the defending champion, does that make you nervous?
#cosmere#cosmeme#brandon sanderson#Stormlight shitpost#incorrect stormlight quotes#The Stormlight Archive#The Way of Kings#Words of Radiance#Oathbringer#torol sadeas#wit#hoid#cephandrius maxtori#midius#cremposting#cfsbf
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