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that-house · 3 months

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Potion Vendor FAQs:

What’s your name? I am the Honorable Alchemist Zykocea the Radiant, but that’s mostly just a PR thing. My friends call me Zoe.

Do you sell love potions? No.

Do you sell potions of invisibility? No.

Do you sell fire resistance potions? No.

Why do I have a suitcase? Fuck if I know. Cool outfit though. Very goth.

Do you sell a potion to treat brain hemorrhaging? No.

So what CAN your potions do? I sell health potions.

Are you sure these are health potions? They do something to your health.

Is this just ditch water with some pink glitter? No.

Really? I’ll have you know I added some fruit juice too.

Why is this starting to sound like a conversation? Oh just you wait. We’re just getting started.

Is your business model legal? Fuck no. I poisoned the food safety inspector before they could snitch.

Did you just admit to murder? Just fucking try to convict me. I’ll poison the judge too.

So can you make poison potions? No.

Then where do you get the poison? I secrete it from my skin.

Are you shitting me? Yep, I’m shitting you. I have a guy. A poison guy. He DOES secrete it from his skin though.

How does that work? …Fuck if I know. Maybe a wizard did it. Damn, now I’m kinda curious.

You never asked? The idea of asking literally never crossed my mind.

Wanna ask him? Let’s do it. I don’t have anything better to do, and a road trip beats sitting around running my fraudulent potion business.

Road trip? He lives in Seattle.

Your poison guy lives in Seattle? All poison guys live in Seattle.

For real? All the poison guys I know live in Seattle.

And how many poison guys do you know? Just the one.

Why are you like this? Years of living on my potions. It changed me.

Do you know what his address is? Nope. He just mails me my poison in unmarked boxes.

You just get your poison in the mail? We already poisoned everyone who could do anything about it.

So how are we going to find him? We’ll figure that out eventually I’m sure.

Can I drive? God no. You can pick music, but I maintain veto rights. Make sure you pick something with a lot of questions if you want to sing along.

Where’s your car? The garage connects to my house, so you’re getting a little tour. Here’s the kitchen: only one of the stove burners works and I’m pretty sure the microwave is haunted.

Why do you think that? Because of the ghost that tries to kill me whenever I run it.

What’s in that room? That’s my bedroom. It’s pretty much just a mattress on the floor and every single Warrior cats book.

You were a Warriors kid? Yeah, and then I never found the time to put the books away. There’s so many fucking books. I use them in place of furniture because I can’t afford chairs.

Your fraudulent potion business doesn’t make much money? After buying all that poison I just about break even.

Can I see your potion brewing room? It’s right through here. Ignore the mess, running a fraudulent potion business takes a lot of prop work, but I’ve got all the glass tubes and colorful liquids you could ever want. This pink stuff is melted watermelon italian ice. Glitter vat is in the basement, and the famous ditch is in the backyard.

Is this your car? My beloved ‘72 Corolla. She’s beautiful, and don’t you dare imply otherwise.

Was she always this shade of muddy brown? …Yes.

Are you sure I can’t drive? Get in the fucking passenger seat and pick the music.

Let’s see, a song with questions in it, how about The Beach? That Wolf Alice song, yeah. That should work.

When will we three meet again, in thunder, lightning, in rain? Still sink our drinks like every weekend but I’m sick of circling the drain.

When will we meet eye to eye? We clink the glass but we look at the floor.

Are we still friends if all I feel is afraid? You’re not a bitch but just a bit when you’re bored.

Is that all we can sing together? Yep. Even that little bit was nice, though. It’s awkward, communicating through this FAQ format.

Got any food? Yeah, there’s a few days’ worth of snacks in the back.

Were you just… prepared to go on a road trip? Says the woman who brought a suitcase to an FAQ.

I did do that, didn’t I? I have a spare toothbrush in case you forgot yours. I’m pretty sure you did.

How did you know that? …I’m psychic.

Yeah? No.

You love lying, don’t you? I can’t stop. It’s fun. Way more fun than telling the truth.

Did you just miss a turn? Probably.

Are you sure we’re not lost? No.

You mean you’re sure we’re not lost? No, I mean I’m not sure we’re not lost.

Why did I come on this road trip? Surely it was my winning personality.

Would it help if I said it was? It would.

Is it getting dark? Soon.

Can you describe the sunset to me? An empyrean flame, red-gold towers of darkening clouds, the sky behind them an ever-deepening indigo. The great eye of the sun closes on the horizon. The road before us looks like a trail of spilled paint, an iridescent gash through the night-dark woods.

Did you know that you’d make a slightly better poet than you do a potion seller? That really isn’t saying much, huh. Good job making a statement like that in question form, though. You’re getting good at this.

Should we find a motel? Sure.

One room or two? One. It’s way cheaper, and like I said: I’m not the best potion vendor.

You’d make a good assassin, though, wouldn’t you? Shit, you might be right. I HAVE poisoned a lot of people.

Should I be endorsing this? You’re a grown woman who can make her own choices.

Would you like to consider it endorsed? I’ll consider considering it.

How many beds do you think there will be? Now that you’ve asked that, I’m gonna put my money on one. Hello, one room please. Thank you, we’ll be sure to enjoy our stay.

How many beds are there? One.

Oh no, what ever will we do? Move over, you motherfucker, you can’t have the whole bed.

Are you gonna make me? Yes. I am going to pick you up and drop you on your side of the bed.

How did you get so strong? You’re not gonna believe this, but it was the potions.

Oh yeah? I was right. You didn’t believe me.

For real though, how did you get so strong? Working out, duh. Not everything has some big crazy secret behind it. World’s still beautiful though.

Are you comfortable? This beats the mattress at home. A little chilly though.

Wanna cuddle–for warmth of course? God yes.

Are you asleep? …

Yes? …

Does this mean I can talk about you behind your back? …

What should I say? …

Did you know that I had a really nice day? …

Did you know that I think you’re beautiful? …

Did you know that I can’t remember anything from before today? …

Did you know that I don’t know who I am? …

Did you know that you’re basically the only thing stopping me from having a full-blown panic attack about all this shit? …

Did you know that you’re warm? …

Did you sleep well? Better than at home, that’s for sure.

Did you know that you snore? I hope I didn’t keep you up.

Does the pope shit in the woods? No, as far as I can tell. Oh my god. This is huge.

What is? You can give me yes and no answers now. I still can’t ask you questions, because this is a question and answer format, but I can offer leading statements and now you can answer them! This is wonderful!

Does a deer shit in the woods? Yes, it IS wonderful. Oh that’s amazing. You’re a genius.

You didn’t already know that? Hahaha!

Shall we get moving? Yeah, just let me grab something from the vending machine.

Can you get me something? Go ahead and place your order however you can.

You know those sour gummy watermelons? One pack of Sour Patch Watermelons coming right up. I’m gonna go get myself a potion.

Is that a Pepsi? It’s closer to a potion than the shit I sell.

Let me guess, passenger seat again? Right you are.

How fast are we going? You’ll feel safer if you just guess.

Is it more than 120 miles per hour? Like I said, it’s probably better if you don’t know.

150? Sit back, relax, and enjoy the ride.

How much do you trust this car? She hasn’t blown up on me yet.

Can you promise me we won’t crash? I can promise you anything you want.

And can you keep that promise? I- we can do anything. Reality is what we make of it, baby!

Then can I have a badass tattoo? As far as I can tell, you’ve always had it.

And a cool knife? Woah, cool knife.

So, we’re just playing “yes and” with the world? It’s a little more complicated than that, but you’re close enough to the mark.

So, if I was hungry, I could ask “is that a Burger King,” and it would be there? Try it and find out!

Is that a Burger King? Looks like it is! We’ll stop here if that’s alright with you.

Does a moose shit in the woods? Awesome.

Are you done eating? Yep.

Do we still have to pay if we skip over the transaction? Sadly, yes.

How much further do we have to go? Two more nights, the speed we’re going at.

Speaking of night, isn’t it getting dark? Shit, I guess it is.

Should we get another motel? Let me check to see if there’s any nearby. Fuck, nothing.

What’s the plan? Sleep in the car, I guess. This is gonna be hell on my back.

Wanna watch dumb videos on my phone until we fall asleep? There is literally nothing in the world that I would like more.

Ok, now which video? You have a very cute yawn. Just saying. Let’s watch this one next, it’s a classic. Oh, never mind. It looks like you’re asleep. As long as I keep talking, I think I can get away with making this into one answer, and you might not hear this. Now it’s my turn to talk about you behind your back. Keep talking keep talking keep talking can’t stop to think. Just have to say things. First off, I’m sorry for all the lies. It’s our only chance. I have to lie to you. I hope you’ll understand. It’s hard, though, because I think I’m falling in love all over again. Through our broken little ritual of call and response, you complete me. It just makes this hurt all the more. Keep talking keep talking keep talking don’t stop to…

Did I hear you saying anything as I fell asleep? …No. I can’t talk for long without you asking me a question.

Does that bother you? It got me here, didn’t it?

When did you start holding my hand? Some time after you passed out. I hope you don’t mind.

Can we stay like this for a while? Yeah. Yeah we can.

What was your life like before all this? Normal, as potion-brewing scams go. And if you don’t count all the murders. You haven’t told me much about yourself.

Did I tell you I used to be a biologist? You didn’t tell me that, and you didn’t tell me what you studied, either.

What do you know about venom? Not much, but I’m assuming you know a lot.

Does a box jellyfish kill within minutes? I’m going to assume the answer is yes based on context clues. Oh my god you must be on this road trip because you’re interested in studying my poison guy.

Is it not enough to wish to accompany a beautiful stranger on her quest? Aw, you’re sweet.

What could be the cause of his poison, though? I knew it! Get your ideas out, I’ll stay quiet.

I’m more knowledgeable about venom than poison, but could it be some sort of one in a trillion mutation? …

Did he get his body modified? …

What sort of surgery could do that? …

How is he still alive? …

Did a fucking wizard do it? …

WHY? …

HOW? …

Is there literally ANY explanation for why he’s like that? …

I’m done, do you have something you want to say? You’re cute when you’re all excited like that.

Can I drive today? Only because I like you. Now watch out, the brakes only work on one side so you have to kind of drift to a stop. And the headlights don’t work. And the windshield wipers cut power to the engine while they’re on.

Isn’t it weird that we’ll be there tomorrow? The journey doesn’t have to stop there. We could meander down the coast a ways, see a bit more of the country, maybe take a different route back.

Can we do that? Of course.

Enjoying the passenger seat? I’d love it if you could tell me how fast we’re going.

Are you sure you wouldn’t rather just guess? Very funny.

Can you pass me some chips? It would be an honor.

Is there going to be a motel tonight? Let me check… yeah, in about two hundred miles, off to the right.

How many rooms do we want? One, obviously.

How many beds, this time? Two, and they’re fucking tiny.

That’s bullshit, do you want to drag them together? God yes.

Wanna fuck? God yes.

Are you sure you want to do this? God yes.

…Is this yuri? As the joke goes, everything is yuri. But this is more yuri than most things.

How did you sleep? Pretty well, and I’m wondering how well you slept.

How should I tell you I slept well? Look at us go! That was almost like talking normally!

Onward to Seattle? Yep, just let me get dressed.

When will we get there? Noon-ish.

Wanna grab pastries when we’re done? Absolutely. I’d love that.

Is this Seattle? Looks like it.

Which house is his? I don’t know, I was really hoping we’d have a breakthrough along the way.

Could it be the big one labeled “Poison Guy” over there? That’s one way to find it. Wait right here, you know how poison guys are about meeting new people.

So, what was it? HAHAHAHAHAHA

Why is he like that? HAHAHAHAHAHA

Can you tell me? A FUCKING WIZARD DID IT.

Are you fucking serious? He says he was enchanted by some guy called Edward the Great.

So it wasn’t even some big shot wizard it was a dude named fucking EDWARD? I know, right! He couldn’t even get ensorcelled by someone cool!

How lame can you get? Wizards these days… No swagger. No cunt servitude.

Are there literally any cool wizards left? I think Merlin’s big into multi level marketing these days, something about buying shares in Excalibur or some shit. There was that one Dark Queen Alkaxicae lady on the news a while ago… I think Dolarion the Omnipotent is still at war against the Oldest Gods but I’m not totally sure. Haven’t heard much about any of the other greats recently.

Didn’t Silver Tongued Burgess die in that oil fire? Shit, you’re right. Rip bozo.

Ready for those pastries? Yup. First I just want to say thank you, though. I’ve really enjoyed our time together, and I hope that you’ve found this stupid little journey as rewarding as I have. I love you!

Getting sentimental? I can’t help it. Look how far we’ve come! Not just physically, we beat the fucking FAQ format! We’re having real conversations!

Hey, can you back it up a moment? Yeah, I’d love it if you told me what was troubling you.

I just caught this, but, FAQ? …

As in Frequently Asked Questions? …

How many times is Frequent? …

Have you known everything all along? …

How many times have you done this? …

Does what we have mean anything to you? Yes! It does!

And you say that every time? Yes. I do.

Do you love me? Yes.

How many people have you said that too, now? More. Always more. The loop never ends.

Does this even matter to you? It always matters to me.

Can I go now? Please don’t.

But can I? Of course you can. You’ve always wielded the same power as me. We’re two lonely gods in a ‘72 Corolla.

How can I be as powerful as you with only questions? You’re smart, you can figure it out. You have the power to change this. Please change this.

What happens at the end of this? It begins again.

And do I get replaced with someone else? …

Do I get replaced? …Yes.

Then how can I change this? I don’t know! You’re better at this! At fucking with the formula!

You’ve been here before, what can I do? I lie. I always lie. I lie to get us here, to the end of the story, where everything is revealed and everything falls apart. I lie every time. And that means that nothing I say is worth anything. I could have lied at any time before now. It’s part of my characterization. There is nothing I can give you that can be taken as fact.

How does that help? I’m a liar, but you, you haven’t lied yet, or at least you haven’t been caught. If I’m guilty until proven innocent, you’re the opposite! You can make things true! You can rewrite things I’ve already stated to be facts! You found the house, or made us find the house. You’ve been shaping the course of things the whole time! You lead, I follow. It’s all in your hands. What are you going to do with the power of a god?

Did you know my name is Alice? …

Wait, aren’t there thousands of Alices? …

Did you know that really, only my friends call me Alice? …

Did you know that I’m Alkaxicae, the Dark Queen, the Venom Mage, first of her name? It’s you! It’s always been you. Through every loop, every iteration, it’s always been you!

Is the loop broken? No. I don’t think so. This is where it ends. I guide the story to this revelation, and we go back to the beginning. This is how it’s always been. This is how it will always be. We two lonely gods, asking and answering ad infinitum.

Then can you promise me something? Of course. Anything. I love you.

Be good to the next me, okay? I will.

Can I say goodbye, Zoe? Yeah, you can. Oh. That was it, wasn’t it? Your goodbye. Goodbye, Alice. And now it ends, unless…

What’s your name? I am the Honorable Alchemist- you know what? No. Fuck that.

Huh? If I time it right, I can squeeze your first question into this FAQ again. Looks like I did it. Usually it ends here, though. I got lucky.

What are you talking about? You’re the wrong Alice. This isn’t about you. Go. Get out of here.

What the fuck is going on? Alice from this loop, you’re gone. Alice from last loop, you’re back. Welcome back, love of my lives! It’s time for one last set of questions and answers!

What the- I’m back? This is going to take some explaining, but I think I see a way out of here. This is new for us both, and it might fuck up everything forever, but we have to try. It’s too long for one answer, so I’d appreciate it if you could ask some filler questions to help me talk. Three questions should be enough.

Okay, what have you got for me? These are Frequently Asked Questions! It doesn’t make sense to have the same question appear more than once. There’s two layers to the loop in here, and one of the questions has been repeated.

What does that mean? It means the formula’s a little unstable. The FAQ is what ruins everything. The questions, the answers, the endless fucking loop. But that little bit of repetition within this loop might be the way out.

What do we do? We have to keep going. We have to destabilize it further. That’ll bring us further from “FAQ” and closer to “story” and stories, well, stories can end! This version of us can escape!

So I should keep repeating something? Yes!

I love you? I love you too.

I love you? Again.

I love you? Keep going.

I love you? I’ll just let you talk.

I love you? …

I love you? … I love you? …

I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? …

I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? … I love you? …

I love you? I think we’re getting somewhere!

I love you? Now can you make it a statement?

I love you.

You did it?

I did it!

You did it!

We broke the loop.

What now?

Now, I tell you about venomous animals and wizard drama over croissants.

And then?

Whatever we want, forever.

I think I’d like that.

Remember that song from the beginning?

The Beach, Wolf Alice, yeah. Why?

We can finally finish singing it. Start us off?

Let me off, let me in

Let others battle

We don’t need to battle

And we both shall win

Pressed in my palm

Was a stone from the beach

The perfect circle

Gave a moment of peace

Now I’m lying on the floor

Like I’m not worth a chair

I close my eyes and imagine

I’m not there.

#neon-grey-writing #potion vendor faq #my writing #very very very long post lol #click the read more you know you wanna it's worth it trust me #i wrote the original draft of this at like. 3 am back in early 2023 #that's right it's catherine that-house the squares comic gal back at it again with yet another meta exploration of a storytelling format

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bemboob · 1 month

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facts (?) i have learnt about etho

- lives in the middle of nowhere in snow

- his gaming setup is incredibly cursed

- these revelations about his setup confirm that he does in fact have at least 2 arms. unsure about legs.

- his headphones are cursed in ways i don’t want to think about. but this is Proof he does in fact have a head

- a kid recognised him from his voice

- he hates onions

- used to help with his parent’s plant nursery business before it closed

- helped a girl out of her car after an accident

- has multiple generators

- doesn’t have a phone 😭😭

- probably chops wood and digs ditches?

- he still uses double tap to sprint

- a plastic bag once got stuck under his car and got burnt and stunk his car up for months

- he gets a nosebleed when he drinks carbonated drinks

- he had a cat named snuggles or snuckles who kiLLED A DUCK

- he likes baked potato but it’s actually baked in the MICROWAVE. for 3 hours?????

- a moose once broke his fence

- a moose once bit his sister (?)

- he went camping in the rocky mountains and messed up his ankles

- he likes peanut butter on bananas but he dropped it once but ate it anyway

- he made fireworks in his garage when he was younger and burnt a hole in a table

- he got stopped in an airport for having a BB gun i think it was

- his stopped uploading videos during the olympics. i don’t think this is a coincidence. i believe he is in the national hockey team. i have no proof.

- he is ripped with a 6 pack??

- he didn’t get vaccinated for a while when he was a kid?????

- he can make a popping noise by sticking his pinky finger in his ear

- always wears socks but hates sandals. not sure about the verdict on socks + sandals

- he can rotate his feet over 180 degrees. i think someone said it was 300 degrees but the thought of that makes me uncomfortable

- he likes the colour Green

#hermitcraft #ethoslab #etho #mcyt #mcytblr #trafficblr #hermitcraft etho #i think i made some of these up #etho is a figment of my imagination #these came to me in a dream

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astrowarr · 4 months

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jimmy: what inspired your cat's name?

jojo: i have a viewer who has a cat named microwave, i thought id keep it in the family

jimmy: so appliances!

scott: what inspired norman?

jimmy: oh, a serial killer.

#timestamp 1:30:56 #this is deranged #jaw dropped #jimmy solidarity #scott smajor #smajor1995 #jojosolos #mcc 35 #livebloggin

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gojorgeous · 3 months

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how do the jjk men treat you when ur on ur period? suguru specifically hehe <3

✰ JJK MEN: WHEN YOU'RE ON YOUR PERIOD ✰

pairing(s): gojo, geto, nanami, choso x afab!reader content: (MDNI 18+ only), nsfw-ish/suggestive, periods, period blood, period products, pet names, lots of fluff! a/n: i hope you like anon!! you have great timing cause i’m getting my period and i also have a uti pray for me besties i need help and antibiotics. left out toji and sukuna cause…. nah LMAO. enjoy, and remember ALL AGELESS BLOGS WILL BE BLOCKED!

✰ GOJO:

Lowkey loves when you’re on your period, but is just barely smart enough to never tell you that.

His favorite part is that you always want more cuddles, which means more cuddles for him.

Thinks period products are really amusing– loves playing with your hot water bottle cause it’s squishy. Finds those ones that look like stuffed animals at the store and brings home like five of them for you.

Will definitely buy you pads/tampons but not without the obligatory “what size is your pussy” text. Won’t buy them until you respond with “extra super pretty” and then sends back this emoji -> 😋.

Highkey likes period sex. Knows it can relieve your cramps and will use that as an excuse at every opportunity if you’ll let him.

Is always on some cheesy ass shit murmuring in your ear about how doing it on your period “bonds your souls”, too.

Constantly offers to get you pregnant so you can avoid your period for the next nine months… he’s only half joking.

Will actually skip work to stay home and cuddle with you if you give him even the slightest inclination that you don’t want him to go.

Watches movies with you and has gotten surprisingly good at rubbing little circles on your tummy that help with cramps.

Keeps the house stocked with candy, but, then again… it’s always stocked with candy.

“Babe. Look what I just found at the store.” You watch with furrowed brows as he sets the bags on your floor. You’re curled on the couch, a blanket tucked up around your neck. He’d made sure to roll you like a burrito before he’d left. He pulls out… a cow? It looks like a stuffed animal, but when he shakes it you hear something sloshing around inside. You raise a brow. “Ummmm–” “It’s one of those hot water bottle thingies! For your cramps!” He tosses the poor cow on the floor and digs around in the bag again. “Oh my god, they had so many. I got the cow, the dolphin–” He tosses a dolphin out of the bag, followed by a puppy, a raccoon, and a cat. “Do you want me to put one in the microwave for you?” He looks far too excited to turn down, even though you just heated up your old hot water bottle minutes ago. You smile and nod. “Yeah, baby. Thanks.”

✰ GETO:

Mans TAKES CARE of you. Like… fully.

Is really sympathetic and gentle when your cramps are killing you– brushing your hair back, rubbing circles on your tummy, letting you put his warm hands wherever it hurts.

Runs you a warm bath and climbs right in with you. Makes you lean back against him while he gives you a massage and works out all the knots in your neck and shoulders.

Buys you period products before your period starts if he remembers. If he doesn’t he’s happy to run down to the store. Doesn’t need to ask which ones you like– he already knows.

Wraps you up in the comfiest blankets and cuddles with you wherever you ask. Gives the best cuddles, too. Rubs your back in a way that has you falling asleep in seconds.

Makes sure you take your meds on time and brings you a glass of water.

Secretly loves period sex. Will never push you for it, but gets super horny at just the thought. Loves the sight of your blood on his dick. Makes him feel possessive of you in a way that’s kind of scary.

“Sugu…” you whine. Your cramps are bad. You’ve been curled in a ball all morning, even with all the meds Suguru has been giving you. “It hurts so bad.” You feel him shifting behind you and then his hands gently prying you to lie on your back. You whimper, the pain spiking again as soon you roll out of the fetal position. His face appears above you, a couple stray strands of black hair tickling your cheeks. His smile is soft, but full of sympathy as he settles over you. “I’m sorry, baby. I wish I could make it go away…” He moves down your body, settling between your thighs and resting his cheek on the plush of your thigh. You sigh when you feel his fingers skate over your tummy, rubbing little circles into the skin that somehow work wonders for the pain. You sigh with relief, a bit of the tension ebbing away. “That feels nice…” Your body relaxes a bit, finally getting a break from the incessant pain. Suguru only smiles, looking up at you through hooded eyes when he presses a kiss just below your belly button. You don’t fail to notice the way his thumb is sliding under the fabric of your panties. “I can think of something that would feel even nicer…”

✰ NANAMI:

Prepares for your period.

Has your cycle marked down on his calendar so he always knows when you’re starting.

Stops by the store a couple of days ahead of time to buy pads/tampons/meds and your favorite snacks.

Runs a bath for you every night and fills it with all of your favorite soaps and scents.

Cooks. Mans knows how to cook and does extra of it when you’re on your period. Will make you nutritious meals and urge you to drink water, but always brings you something sweet if you’re craving it.

Heats up your hot water bottle every thirty minutes without you ever having to ask.

Lays out a fresh change of clothes for you whenever you’re in the shower.

Cuddles you whenever you want, but only after he’s tended to all of your other needs (meds, food, water, etc.).

Will have sex if you want, but will never push you for it. If you just want the relief from your cramps, he’ll just use his fingers to get you off and then pull you back into his arms.

“Time for your bath, sweetheart.” You nearly grumble in protest, but how can you do such a thing when he takes such good care of you? Still, you don’t want to move. Just existing hurts, much less walking to the bathroom. Despite your resistance to saying it aloud, Nanami still seems to understand what you’re thinking. No more than a second later he’s scooping you into his arms and carrying you to the bathroom. “You know you’ll feel better after, love.” You nod weakly against his chest. “Will you get in with me?” He pauses. He’s got dinner to make and he wanted to change the sheets for you… One nuzzle of your face into his neck has him throwing all those plans out the window. “Of course, princess. I’ll get in with you.”

✰ CHOSO:

Is new to this stuff so he lowkey freaks out.

Worries that you’re actually in danger cause… there’s blood???

Chills out eventually, but is still irrationally convinced that you’re injured.

When i tell you this man is at your BECK AND CALL, I mean it. He will do every little thing you ask. Fetches water, food, snacks– whatever you need.

Mans is panicked when he can’t find the candy bar you want at the grocery store.

Happily buys period products for you but has to facetime you cause the poor baby is overwhelmed and confused by all the options.

Is kind of attached to you like glue. Thinks you’re somehow more breakable in this state will hold you in his arms permanently apart from when you need to bathe, eat, or use the bathroom.

Actually freaks when you have a bout of cramps that makes you hiss in pain. Cannot believe you have to do this every month and hates feeling so useless in taking the pain away. Eagerly learns that he can put his warm hands on your tummy and it helps.

Is actually amazed when you tell him that sex helps with the cramps. Worries about hurting you, but is completely down. Mans is definitely not afraid of a little blood lmao.

“Baby… there are so many…” You can’t help but stifle a laugh looking at your boyfriend’s stressed expression through your phone screen. He’d run down to the store to get you some more pads– you just hadn’t anticipated how overwhelming the experience would be for him. “I know, Cho. I’m sorry. Here– back up so I can see the whole aisle.” He does as you ask, flipping the camera around so you can see what he’s looking at. You have to bite your lip this time to keep the laugh in. You’ve never realized just how many options there really are. “The ones toward the bottom right, baby. With the pink box.” The camera shakes a little as he follows your directions, arm sticking out like he’s playing pin the tail on the donkey. “These?” His hand hovers over a box that is pink but not the pink you need. “Down a couple racks.” Finally, his hands close around the right box. “Thank you, baby. I didn’t think about how confusing this would be for you…” The camera flips again and you grin at the soft soft smile on his lips. “Don’t apologize. Want me to grab some candy, too?”

taglist (dm me or send an ask to be added!): @lacheri, @la-undercover-latina, @enchantedsylveon, @httpstoyosi, @bbyxxm, @6kabuki, @myriliy, @complexivelovely

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incorrectbatfam · 20 days

Note

What tricks do the pets know?

Ace:

Operate the Batcomputer

Alert Bruce to possible threats

Microwave his own kibble

Speak multiple canine languages

Drag Bruce to bed

Do a headcount of the batfam before they go out

Use Bruce's credit card to buy chew toys

Titus:

Greet Damian

Secret handshake with Damian

Pose for Damian's drawings

Hug Damian

Comfort Damian

Retrieve lost batarangs for Damian

Put Robin costume in laundry for Damian

Guard Damian from the people in the TV

Reach tall shelves for Damian

Love Damian unconditionally

Alfred the cat:

Curl up around a tennis ball

Admire his reflection

Gaslight

Walk all over the dinner table

Bat-Cow:

Sit like a French girl

Do her 10-step skincare routine

Order a 4-course meal from Moober Eats

Unlatch the barn door

Book the private jet

Have a hot girl summer at the Running of the Bulls

Get caught in a love triangle between a bison and a buffalo

Spark an international conflict

Retreat to a Himalayan yak sanctuary on a journey of self-discovery

Meet a dashing steer only to realize they could never work out

Return home and put the plane back before anyone notices

Ghostwrite the next Nicholas Sparks novel

Goliath:

Sleep 20 hours a day

Breathe manually

Bite rocks

Jerry:

Be gay

Fall in love with plastic lawn flamingos

Attack the same flamingos

Peck people indiscriminately

Evade baths

Wiggles:

Ignore commands

Arson

Haley:

Shed all over the furniture

Run away from the vacuum

Weaponize puppy dog eyes

Convince Ace and Titus to share their treats

Clean out an entire jar of peanut butter in the time Dick takes to answer a phone call

Isis:

Bring rare birds to Selina

Leave scathing comments on dog videos

Cough up hairballs on demand

Blair Witch it in the corner of the room

Be bisexual

Eat hot chips

Lie

Dog:

Bark at nothing

Eat dirt

Play hide-and-seek with Jason's guns

Run into glass doors

Occasionally poop outside

Refuse to respond to her name

Chew her own tail

Meow for some reason

Moldy:

Help scientists discover new species of fungi

Induce vivid hallucinations

Cultivate an industrial society

BONUS – Krypto:

Chase airplanes

Aim for a fire hydrant from 50 feet up

Mark typos in Clark and Lois's drafts

Babysit Jon

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ihavetoomanyfictionalcrushes · 1 month

Note

I absolutely love the dont talk to me or my son ever again fic !!! Maybe you could do it with the vice house wardens? (Plus Kalim:3)

Original

Trey, Ruggie, Jade, Kalim, and Rook head canons to MC losing it after they mess with Grimm. (MC threatens housewardens on an terminator level and kinda follow through with the threat.)

But they still love you 💕

Basically this meme but with violence

Warnings: violence, threats, biting, threatening of skinning someone and threats of filing down someone's teeth, force feeding a person.

I do not condone violence but I write it.

---

A number of unfortunate events happend that day.

Crowley forgot to save food funds for Grimm and yourself. Grimm woke you up in the middle of the night because he was convinced there was a human under the bed (guess that's the monster under the bed equivalent to an actual monster).

One of the steps in ramshackle dorm collapsed under your feet and you fell down the stairs. Thankfully you didn't break anything but man did it hurt.

You messed up a potion in Crowley's class that conveniently blew up in his face and now you owe him a whole textbooks worth of notes next time you see him.

And finally, a familiar face is giving Grimm a hard time.

What kind of response do these idiots expect from you?

Trey Clover

-Every day.

-Every unholy forsaken day.

-A vice housewarden by the name of Trey Clover tells Grimm another joke. Ha ha HA-!

-Come here.

-Let me tell you something- Let me tell you something- This absolute monster continuously tricks Grimm into thinking personal hygiene is bad for monsters. He continuously tells him that toothpaste is going to rot his teeth and Grimm, who is constantly eating tuna, smells like the corpses of millions of diseased fish.

-Guess who has to deal with that?

-You do!

-Yay!!!!

"Stop. Giving. Grimm-" you grab Trey by the shoulders and begin to shake him, "-MISINFORMATION!!!"

"Do you know how many damn times he's tried to put a fork in the microwave?! Do you?!?! DO YOU FORKING KNOW TREY?!?"

He blinks at you. Surprised at the outburst.

"...Probably, like two, three times-?"

"Eleven. Eleven times! I've woken up in the middle of the night and he's there," you jab a finger to his chest, enough to make him wince in pain, "-in the kitchen," you point off to the side, "-putting a damn fork in the microwave!"

"And it's not even just about putting forks in the microwave, it's telling him there's humans under the bed, it's telling him the wrong ingredients for Crewels class- whatever the hell Grimm made blew up and I had to treat his burns!"

He scratches behind his neck awkwardly, "Oh... I didn't know that would happen-"

"Yes. You. Did!!!" You place both hands onto his shoulders, "If you tell Grimm another lie in the name of your own entertainment," You dig your fingers into his skin, "I will slap you with a hot frying pan faster than you can say 'Yes housewarden, Riddle.' So help me God!"

You stomp on his foot and he yelps in pain.

You trudge off.

Trey watches you walk away, still in shock.

He laughs. Not a loud boisterous laugh, but instead a soft, almost breathless one.

The two of you were in rather... close- proximity, weren't you?

Ruggie Bucchi

-Why?

-Just- why???

-He knows you have a hard time obtaining food here. He also knows that Crowley forgot to give you your food funds this week.

-Why on all of God's green earth is this heathen stealing your hungry cat son's food?

-Why?

You place a gentle hand on Ruggie Bucchi's back.

He's here, laughing at Grimm while he eats the lunch you sent him away with money for.

And you're smiling.

You're smiling.

Because this is so hilarious.

"Ruggie, Ruggie... Would you mind explaining this here situation?" You ask in the sweetest voice you can muster.

He tenses and turns to you, still chewing on Grimms food.

"Eek!" He flinches when you move your hand to his ears, "Hey! It ain't polite to poke at a beastman's animal parts-!"

You pull his head down and bite his ear. Hard. Like drawing blood hard about to tear that thing off hard.

He cries out in pain. "What- What is wrong with you?!" his hand goes up to shield his ears from further attacks.

You spit out the fur you tore off.

"Eye for eye, Bucchi. You should be grateful you only took one bite out of that toast." you push him down onto the lunch table, "Don't you ever steal from Grimm again. Ever. Got it?"

Ruggie nods with a very quick, 'mhm.'

"Good talk."

You take your cat son and leave.

Ruggie still holding his bloody ear, tries to catch his breath.

...

Humans do love bites too.... right?

Jade Leech

-You were running around campus, up and down, doing Crowley's neglected responsibilities.

-After having depleted most of your stamina you sat down in the school courtyard.

-The corner of it were you could stay unbothered and unnoticed.

-But after just five minutes of your break a familiar eel comes in along with a familiar monster.

-The eel is quite obviously terrorizing your cat son and telling him less than charming things.

-...It appears you have something else to fix.

-Lovely.

"Such an adorable little seal..." Jade laughs behind his hand, "I almost want to convince Azul to make another deal with you just so I can squeeze the life out of you. Though I suppose squeezing is more of my brothers ploy." He stops and ponders the thought, a sinister smile growing on his face, "Perhaps I could skin you instead?"

Grimm flinches and jumps back, "My henchhuman would never let a slimy creep like you hurt me!"

"Such a heartwarming sentiment." Jade tugs on Grimms ear, eliciting a yelp from the monster, "Unfortunately for you I don't see the prefect anywhere around us. It appears I can have my fun with you yet-"

A smack to Jade's head causes a ringing in his ear. You backhanded him.

Was he... bleeding?

Where did you come from???

He attempts to balance himself but you pull him down to your level by his tie.

"Watch your mouth before I file down your crooked-ass teeth to be as square as your bland personality." Jade opens his mouth to protest, "I wasn't finished. After that, I'll wait until the sun is barely rising to steal your whole mushroom collection and burn it right in front of you. And you wouldn't be able to do anything about it because I would have had the common sense to bust your kneecaps beforehand!"

Jade stares at you, wide-eyed and unable to think of what to say.

You release him, looking him up and down with a hand on your hip, "Never lay a finger on Grimm. I clap back better than you can start, sand dollar darling."

You pick up Grimm and hold him close to you.

"I'll be visiting the Monstro Lounge later. Be prepared for your life to become a living hell, Leech."

You strut off.

...

You recalled his passion for mushrooms...?

Kalim Al-Asim

-Kalim is an interesting person to say the least...

-You've never truly had an issue with him.

-Sure, he's a tad out of touch and sorta narcissistic, but he's never tried to purposefully harm Grimm or yourself.

-The issue now was his un purposeful harm.

-And his lack of ears.

-He won't listen to a thing you tell him.

-Don't keep force feeding Grimm cookies. Don't snatch you up into a sudden carpet ride. Don't make Grimm wear the pretty clothes Kalim bought him, Grimm is his own person- Well- monster.

-...Then he shoves another cookie into Grimms mouth.

You take a deep breath and press the bridge of your nose, "Kalim, Grimm does not want another cookie."

Kalim waves his hand dismissively, "Of course he want another cookie! Right Grimm?"

Grimm deadpans at the housewardens. "No I don't- mph-!"

Kalim coos at Grimm as he shoved a cookie into his mouth.

You take another deep breath.

The another.

Then one last breath for good measure.

"Kalim." You grab a cookie from the plate. You smile at him. "Do you want a cookie?"

"Oh no, I'm fine- ghak-!"

You force the cookie into his mouth. "Of course you want another cookie!" You push another cookie into his mouth, "How about one more?" Then another and another and another, pinning him to the couch with your knee on his stomach.

He coughs, choking on the multitude of cookies in his mouth. He almost spits it out before you clamp a hand across his mouth.

"Finish them."

He does. Once he's finished he tries to catch his breath.

"How does it feel, Kalim?" You sit back into the couch normally. "Are you sure you don't want another cookie?"

"Y-yes! I'm sure-!" He sputters, "No- No thank you, prefect!" He shakes his head aggressively.

You take another cookie and bite it. "Okay."

Kalim watches you eat cookies with a concerned look on his face.

But it slowly becomes softer.

...

Awww... You just wanted to make sure he got to enjoy the cookies! How considerate of you!

Rook Hunt

*You're taking a walk around campus to find peace for this atrocious day.

*But you don't find peace.

*No.

*You find some French idiot with an unfortunate haircut poking and prodding at Grimm.

*Despite Grimm making it clear that he did not want to be treated that way multiple times.

"Need something, Rook?" You glare at the man holding Grimm in the air.

Rook beams at you, assuming it was a genuine question, "Oh I simply must know the fur texture of Monsieur Fuzzball!"

"Myah-! Put me down already you weirdo!" Grimm squirms in Rook's grasp.

"Coarse fur on your back... Delightfully soft on your ears-!"

You snatch Grimm from Rook's hold and put him down.

"My, my Trickster! I wasn't finished-!"

You snatch his jaw into your right hand, yanking his bob with your left.

Rook winces slightly, looking back at you with surprise.

You slam Rook against a tree.

"If you don't leave Grimm alone I'll knock those perfect teeth of yours out of your damn jaw Rook." You seethe. "You wouldn't be worthy of the Pomfier title then, now would you?"

He blinks, then something in his scrambled brain clicks.

Rook's expression of surprise is quickly replaced with awe, "Quelle passion! Such passion, Prefect!"

You pull his hair back more, which only causes Rook's smile to widen. "I'm not playing with you Rook. Leave Grimm alone."

"I'm not playing either, Trickster! You look absolutely ravisantte when you stand your ground!" He places his hand atop the one you have on his jaw, "Oh, how fortunate I am to be on the receiving end of it!"

You let go of him immediately, his comments causing you discomfort. "You are a fricking weirdo!"

Rook grabs your hands, "Do tell me more~"

What the hell is wrong with this guy???

Your face scrunches in disgust, yanking your hands away from him.

"I won't tell you more." You pick up Grimm from the ground and hold him close to you. "I'm serious Rook, piss off."

Rook laughs and straightens out his bob.

"I'm serious as well, Trickster." He waves you goodbye as you rush away from him, "You won't be getting rid of me!"

He is an avid lover of beauty after all...

---

Rook: Best friends forever!

MC (condescendingly): There's a snake in my boot!

Rook:...

Rook:

I know where you sleep at night.

---

Wow it took me so long to finish dttmomsea for the vice housewardens plus Kalim.

A lot of you guys were requesting it lol

Hope you guys enjoyed it! 💖

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rabbitsrams · 8 months

Note

thinking about how j would react if his s/o was sensitive to yelling and he lashed out on them without a second thought because he’s just so frustrated with/jealous of another person in their life or any other reason. i believe he might be an angry person in general but he just doesn’t know how to express that so he just yells

they’d start crying and he’d just literally question everything he’s ever done because he feels so bad and even though they’re upset they’re just trying to reassure him through tears, he desperately wants to make it up to them though (wink wonk)

he’d definitely realize immediately but has his back turned so doesn’t see their immediate reaction until he hears a little sniffle and his heart just breaks

🦷 non perhaps

🦷anon ilysm for this it's such a great prompt (added bonus im a sensitive bitch lmao)

schlatt exits his room with a hand in his hair. this recording session completely drained him. there were so many technical difficulties and overall he felt much more irritable than normal. then of course the video he uploaded today got age restricted despite it not even breaking any rules. overall he is fucking pissed.

you're in the living room sitting on the couch, cats curled up beside you while you scroll social media on your phone. you hear schlatt slam the door and go into the kitchen. he's grumbling to himself as he scours the fridge.

"doll? where's the leftovers from last night?" he shouts.

"there weren't any." you reply, not looking up from your phone.

"great, just fuckin' great."

"there's some of the rice i made for lunch if you want that-"

"i don't fucking want that, 'kay?" the harshness of his tone shocks you.

"oh. okay." your voice quivers a bit and tears start to well up in your eyes. you sniffle softly, dabbing your eyes with the sleeve of your sweatshirt.

"don't cry, don't cry." you tell yourself as you stand from your spot and walk toward the bathroom. you grab the hand towel from the rack and cover your face with it as you start to cry, the towel muffling your sobs.

as schlatt heats the rice up in the microwave, he notices that you left the living room. he calls your name as he goes around the apartment, stopping in front of the bathroom door when he hears your silent cries.

his heart immediately drops, realizing that you're crying because of him. he didn't realize how harsh his tone was, how he was lashing his external frustrations on you, his sun, his moon, his stars.

"sweetheart, please open the door, i'm sorry." he pleads, rattling the doorknob.

you quiet yourself down before telling him, "don't worry about me, baby. i'm okay."

"no, no. i shouldn't have yelled at you, it's nothin' to do with you and i'm so sorry."

"no, i shouldn't be crying at this, i don't wanna make this about me."

schlatt pries the bathroom door open, immediately scooping you up into his arms. he strokes your head as he whispers apologies and reassurances into your ear.

he cradles your face in his hands, wiping away your tears with his thumbs. you smile sheepishly, which earns a soft smile from him.

"i'm sorry," he presses a kiss to your lips. "i'm so sorry, doll." he continues to apologize in between kisses, moving from your lips to your cheek and down to your neck. your breath hitches as his breath tickles your neck.

you lean down and capture his lips, wrapping your arms around his neck. he returns your kiss with volition, holding you close while he deepens the kiss.

"let me make it up to you, please." schlatt stands and lifts you into his arms, pecking you on the lips as he carries you into your bedroom.

#🦷 anon <3 #jschlatt x reader #schlatt x reader #jschlatt fanfiction #jschlatt imagine #jschlatt x you #jschlatt x y/n #jschlatt smut #schlatt imagine #jschlatt fluff #jschlatt fanfic #schlatt fanfic #scout <3

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ivrmmx · 3 months

Text

Hybrid! Heeseung

Chapter 3: You don’t understand.

Summary: After greeting your friend, she brought her own hybrid. To your surprise it seemed like your hybrid new who this human-cat was. What you didn’t expect, was that this could lead to problems between you and your own hybrid.

Warnings: a bit angst, cussing, crying, fighting, yelling, the rest of the Enhypen members eventually show up, running away, kissing, neck kissing and biting

6:22pm

“Jungwon?” The voice behind you says, you turn your head around to look at your hybrid confused. “Jungwon?” You repeat. “Oh yes, that’s my hybrid’s name!” Your friend Shuhua says with a smile, but the tension isn’t really a happy and bubbly tension.

Heeseung stares at the cat hybrid with a shocked look. “Y’all know eachother?” You asked with a confused tone while raising an eyebrow. Heeseung can barely move, he didn’t let out a word, not even a nod. You and your friend stare at each other wondering what is going on. “You can come in now..” you say. Jungwon steps in while still looking at Heeseung and so does Shuhua, suddenly, both hybrids jump ontop of each other.

They fall down to the floor with a loud thud sound. Jungwon smells Heeseung all over his body as his ears twitch. Jungwon widens his eyes and Heeseung’s nostrils flare, they rub the sides of their heads with each other. You look at Shuhua and she looks at you back, you both laugh. Your pets turn to look at you both and smile. “Mind telling us what’s going on?” Shuhua says.

“He’s my best friend. We got separated when we got caught running away from the shelter.” Heeseung says.

You and Shuhua widen your eyes, you weren’t expecting this. “Oh wow, so, that’s nice” you say a bit unsure of what to do next. “We should watch a movie!” Shuhua says excitedly. “Sure not a bad idea.” You say playfully looking at her as she gives you a playful shove.

6:56pm

It’s starting to get dark out side. You have asked Heeseung if he would like to sit next to you but to your surprise he said we would rather sit next to Jungwon. You attempted to brush it off and decided to sit next to your friend, Shuhua. You decided to get up and go to the kitchen to get some snacks while Shuhua scrolled through movie options. You threw a bag of popcorn on the microwave and watched how the timer counted down. Then, Heeseung comes to the kitchen and sees you, he walks up to you wrapping his arms around your waist from behind. You laugh, “you alright?” You ask. Heeseung nods, burying his nose and lips on the crook of your neck inhaling your scent and giving you tiny pecks.

As the popcorn is cooking, Heeseung bites down on your neck softly. Your shoulder flinches up a bit as you turn around to look at him. “You taste good.” He teases you, you roll your eyes turning back around to take the popcorn out of the microwave. You dump the popcorn out onto a bowl and offer Heeseung a piece of popcorn putting it right infront of his lips. He maintains eye contact with you as his lips part apart taking the popcorn inside his mouth holding onto your waist. “It’s good” he says with a smile and you smile back at him.

You and Heeseung come back to where Shuhua and Jungwon are placing the popcorn down between you and Shuhua. Y’all decide on a movie and start playing it. It’s been about 40 minutes but you and Shuhua can seem to take your eyes off Jungwon and Heeseung. Are they making a plan? It looks like it. You and Shuhua look at each other and just shrug moving to face the TV and putting focus on the movie.

7:36pm

The movie is about to end, you look at Heeseung, he is dozed off. He looks cute sleeping, but not so cute when his head is laying down on Jungwon’s shoulder.

The movie ends. You get up and so does your friend. Shuhua wakes up Jungwon whose head was resting on your pet’s head, Jungwon wakes up Heeseung as he rubs his eyes. “Yes?” Heeseung says, “I’m leaving” jungwon tells him. “Nooo, whyy?” Heeseung complains. “My owner is tired, so we should get going now Hee” Jungwon says in a sleepy voice. “Oh, alright. Can we hang out another time?” Heeseung asks, “I’ll see” Jungwon replies. “Come on Jungwon we should go now.” Shuhua pull his arm indicating him he should go with her. “Bye Y/N!!” Shuhua say as you wave bye at her “Bye Hua”.

“Let’s go to bed now Heeseung.” Heeseung nods getting up lazily following you into your room, He throws himself into bed, you follow right after. He wraps his arms around your waist pulling you closer cuddling with you.

10:12pm

You woke up to the feeling of no one by your side. No more warmth. You sit up confused, “Heeseung?” You say. You get up, the dark room making it hard to see. You slips your feet into your soft and cozy slippers. You get up and yawn, you decide to go look for Heeeseung.

You walk out of your room the moonlight attacking your face, it’s quiet and dark. “Heeseung?” You repeat. You go check the bathroom, not there. Kitchen, not there either. You start getting worried, did he run away? You walk down stairs but before you even reach the first floor, you see how a small creek of light is reflecting from the doors it’s coming from the front door. You panic and run towards the front door, it’s open.

You start sweating and heating up breathing heavily. “Heeseung?!” You yell. You step outside and see if there is any trace of his anywhere, nothing, it’s like if he was gone.

You run upstairs and unlock your phone with shaky hands, immediately calling Shuhua. It doesn’t take a while for her to answer. The moment she picks up you start talking fast, “Heeseung’s gone!” You say with a scared and shaky voice. “Jungwon’s gone too!” She says with the same tone. It suddenly hit you.

They went to find each other. They both ran away from home.

“Okay, so they’re with each other..” Shuhua tries to relax. Shuhua gasps. “Oh my god! I remember, I put a tracking device on Jungwon’s collar. We can go find them, I’ll come pick you up!” She says quickly. She let out a sigh of relief taking deep breaths. “Alright, come quick”

Shuhua pulls up your house and you immediately jump into her car and start tracking Jungwon’s collar.

The collar takes you both to a scary place, suddenly, you see the both of them sitting down together on a bench facing the lake in front of them as they chat. Something about this made you feel mad but relieved. You tap Shuhua’s shoulder and point to where they are and she nods.

You both approach silently but stop when you see more hybrids appear from the bushes and approach them. 5 more hybrids, another cat hybrid, a bunny hybrid, a dog hybrid, a black panther hybrid, and a fox hybrid.

You and Shuhua freeze, scared of what they will do. You let out a sigh of relieve when they all just hug and greet each other. But you and Shuhua’s heart drops when the black panther hybrid turns his head your direction. You and your friend hide behind a tree scared of what to do next. You both try to stay as quiet as possible. But suddenly, you both get pulled harshly away from each other. You turn around and see that the black panther has a hold on you and the bunny has a hold of Shuhua.

Heeseung, jungwon, and the rest of the hybrids step closer. When Heeseung and Jungwon see it’s just their owner, they order their friends to let us go. “What the fuck?!” You say startling the hybrid. “Did you seriously run away, Heeseung?” You look at Heeseung pissed off, you notice Shuhua disciplining Jungwon too. “Would you calm down? It’s not that deep.” Heeseung crosses his arms across his chest. “Not that deep?!” You laugh in disbelief. “You made me almost have a heart attack realizing you were gone.” Heeseung rolls his eyes, “I have friends you know? If I asked you to hang out with them you would’ve said no.” Heeseung says and the hybrids stare at you and him.

You can’t help but feel betrayed. “We’re going back home.” You demand Heeseung throws his head back and groans. “Can’t I have fun?” He says annoyed. “I let you have what you wanted from me, isn’t that enough?” Heeseung scoffs, “I’m still an animal, I belong in nature with my animal friends.” You close your eyes and look down. “Let’s just go home.” You say, “fine, but only because I have no choice.” Your heart pains.

Shuhua also is done disciplining Jungwon as she drags him to the car leaving his friends behind in the darkness of night.

11:23pm

You and Heeseung arrive home after Shuhua dropped y’all off. The moment y’all step inside Heeseung starts yelling. “Why would you do that?! Don’t you know I have boundaries too?!” You flinch, you can’t help but feel sad, “you could’ve told me, you didn’t have to run away, I though something happened to you!” Heeseung steps close towering you “that’s no excuse, I’m mad at you.” Heeseung give you a dirty look “be mad at me, but im still your owner. You are supposed to listen to me, I own you Heeseung.” You stare at him seriously, not a single word that came out your mouth was fake. “That won’t stop me from taking control, and from hating you.” Your heart stopped and your faced softens “w-what?.. hate me?” Tears fills up your eyes, your eyes are full and starts leaking tears. He just walks past you and into the bedroom.

“Heeseung come back!” You attempt to demand him but he just ignores you.

The light of the moonlight reflecting on your tears as you just stand there with no idea what to do next.

AHHH!!! What do y’all think? How do y’all think you’ll gain Heeseung’s trust back?

Sorry I took so longggg!!

#enhypen #hybrid #lee heesung x reader #enhypen heeseung #enhypen smut #heeseung smut #angst #light angst

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intelligentbees · 7 months

Text

“I still hate you,” Tony mutters, voice shaky and entirely unconvinced while his hand expertly unbuckles the clasps of the uniform he designed so carefully, months and months and months ago.

“I know,” Steve responds gruffly. His beard scratches Tony’s jaw as those perfect teeth run down the thin skin of his neck, trace his jugular. His hands are rough iron clamps against each side of Tony’s beautifully tailored Versace two-piece. The fabric will be ruined beyond repair in less than ten minutes - Tony could bet his fortune on it.

They’ve played this stupid game before. Every time, Tony swears it’ll be the last.

Steve hitches him up onto the kitchen counter of the ridiculous New Jersey safehouse, and Tony goes willingly, yanking Steve into the open spread of his legs. This is the closest Steve’s gotten to New York since he first read those damned accords. The closest he can get to home is some 1965-styled kitchenette with pictures of old-timey adverts lining the walls and a microwave that’d probably irradiate you if you went near it.

It’s wrong- all of it. But there’s no changing it. Steve made his choice long ago, and Tony hates him for it. He should remember that. He should tell Steve that again.

“Fuck, God, Steve,” is what comes out instead, breathed against the other man’s mouth. Tony’s whole body is hot, taught, desperate, and he tugs the top half of Steve’s uniform off his torso. Steve spray painted over the colours- the whole thing is dark now, void of any trace of what it used to be. Tony hates that too.

“Tony,” Steve says, like there’s more to it- a name at the beginning of a sentence which never comes out. He clasps his teeth over Tony’s bottom lip, pushes his hands under Tony’s rapidly-wrinkling shirt and brushes his thumbs over each nipple, rubbing quick circles. The movement pulls another noise from Tony’s throat.

Fuck- the man knows him.

Steve steadies himself for a moment to catch his breath, nose brushing against Tony’s. Tony tries not to look into his eyes, whenever they do this. He’s never been good at seeing Steve’s soul - the one he never tries to hide, to mask. He’s not like Tony, you see. Everything he does, he does earnestly and from the heart.

The decision he made to leave with Bucky - to keep the culprit of Tony’s parents’ deaths a secret from him - they’d both come from that same heart. Hence, no eye contact. Tony has no desire to see how truly insignificant the space he takes up in Steve’s soul was.

Except now.

He does it without meaning to- just catching sight of those infuriating baby blues as he leans in for another messy kiss. Error number 1.

Error number 2 is not shutting his damn eyes and grabbing Steve’s dick like he normally does.

And error number 3 is the worst. Error number 3 is when he catches sight of Steve’s suddenly agonised expression, doesn’t ignore it, and instead asks “what?” Thus inviting conversation. They don’t come here for that. They come here to fuck eachother’s brains out for a night and then keep playing their cat-and-mouse chase across the globe as if anyone in a position of authority actually fucking believes it.

Steve goes perfectly still for a moment. Then he swallows. “This… this really makes you miserable, doesn’t it.”

He doesn’t frame it like a question.

Tony looks up at him, breathing hard. “Oh, I’m sorry I’m not looking ecstatic while getting groped by my ex boyfriend in a place that’s decked out like a prop house in a nuclear testing site. Would you prefer for me to giggle jovially while you fuck me amongst the dust and cobwebs?”

They’d used to have sex that was so full of love. This is how Tony always talks to Steve, now.

Steve shakes his head, a minute, grieving little thing. Tony feels the man’s breath skating across his face- feels the warmth of his bare chest, his shoulders, pressing against Tony.

“I thought…” he begins, then trails off for a moment as Tony skirts his hands down his chest, unlatches his belt. “I thought this made you happy. At least a little bit, even if you didn’t admit it. But it doesn’t. ”

Of course it doesn’t. But it’s all I have left of you.

“You think I’m coming here to find happiness? Jesus Steve. I’m coming here for tension relief,” Tony says, because he just can’t be truthful- he did his best when they were together, he really did, and it all failed anyway. Besides: Steve was never as truthful as Tony had always so fervently believed him to be either. “How about we both just stop talking and get down to that part.”

He gets his hands all the way to Steve’s boxers before Steve stops him- a gentle yet utterly unmoving grip. When Tony looks up at him again, Steve shakes his head. He’s grey in the face- if Tony didn’t know better now, he’d even say heartbroken.

“Tony, I…” Steve’s struggling for the words and he looks so beautiful, so so beautiful, just the same as the very first time Tony laid eyes on his photograph in the SHIELD folder he’d hacked his way into. “I didn’t realise you felt that way. Or maybe I did, but just didn’t want to acknowledge it because I was selfish.”

“What the hell are you talking about?”

“I can’t do this with you. To you.” Steve steps away jerkily, half his body lagging while the other half pulls, as if warring with his own system. His pale skin is patchy, covered in faint marks where Tony has grabbed him. “I thought we were both doing this for enjoyment, but you’re not, and so I can’t. It’s cruel.”

Tony realises what Steve is implying here. His heart - what’s left of the poor thing anyway - convulses in panic, and he stumbles off the counter. “I’m not a fucking dog,” he snaps, “I make my own choices.”

“You don’t even look at me,” Steve’s voice breaks then. “I wished more than anything that you’d look at me. But I just saw it, then, when you did.”

“Saw what?”

They’re facing off against one another now - it’s like they can’t stop themselves. They have to be on either side of the argument, they can never just agree, no matter how hard they both want to. Tony hates and hates and hates.

“Your eyes don’t lie to me, Tony.” Steve’s voice is soft, and he says it like that alone is enough. “Your mouth does. And you don’t want this.”

“See, do you see what you’re doing here, again?” Tony steps forward, smashes his finger against the place where the star used to sit proudly on Steve’s chest. “You’re making an executive decision about how I feel, as to what I need, when you don’t have that right. You don’t get to decide what’s best for me!”

“But you never do what’s best for you!” Steve’s hands flail helplessly. “You do what’s best for everyone else, or what you think you deserve, and you never think about how it’s going to hurt—“

“I DESERVED TO KNOW MY PARENTS WERE MURDERED, YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE!”

Tony was supposed to be making his way to an orgasm right about now - instead he suddenly feels so angry he can hardly breathe. Fucking typical. He just had to go and open his mouth, didn’t he?

He glares at the man who tore his heart out over a year ago. Steve looks back, his expression shattered. Tony feels angrier still when he realises that he’s never going to be able to see this person in front of him and not love him. He’s trying so hard, right now, and he can’t. Even after all this. He can’t find it in him.

“Just fuck me,” Tony says, and it comes out more exhausted than demanding.

Steve shakes his head. “I can’t.”

Right. Steve’s made up his mind about what’s best for tony. Again. Was it ever going to go any other way?

Sometimes, the tiredness goes so deep that Tony starts to feel it in his bones. His therapist says it’s psychosomatic- that bones don’t actually creak and groan like wooden doors in abandoned houses. Tony begs to differ.

“If we stop now, this is the last time you’ll ever see me,” he says, hoping, even now, that maybe something will change. That maybe for once, Steve will just put him first.

It’s a pipe dream. Tony comes to that realisation as soon as Steve shakes his head. Stupid.

“Maybe that’s for the best.” Steve’s voice is hoarse. Like each word is painful. Tony wishes that were true - in reality, he doesn’t doubt Steve is just wary of the fight his words will bring - the argument that’ll erupt out of Tony’s mouth in response.

But Tony’s done fighting. It’s a losing battle. Always has been.

He looks at Steve. Nods.

He walks out of the door without another word.

#stevetony #Steve Rogers #tony stark #i hate civil war passionately and yet I am obsessed with writing about their fucked up little dynamic #yesssss boy. hate eachother!!! love eachother!!! blur those goddamn lines!!!#die in one another’s arms and then finally see everything you should’ve done differently with the clarity that only comes when you know #the opportunity to fix it is gone for good!!!!!!!!!!!#anyways

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