cant wait to go to dcc this weekend im gonna meet so many twt mutuals and look at everyone's cool af cosplays and SEE BEN BARNES and hopefully they've got artoo and bb8 again I cANT WAIT

let me just make an unfocused post with all the things running through my head in regards to the handong and masked dancer stuff

first off, like, imagine being that masked dancer and knowing you have to try to match handong's level... i hope she does a good job though! i wonder who she is, cause dreamcatcher dances are not easy at all, lol

also, i wonder what lines in the song will go to handong once she’s back? they definitely planned this out in advance, given how they planned the choreo out with handong in mind. so there are lines in the song that are already designated as handong lines, i’m sure of it. 

so, we were all wondering why handong/DCC would decide to do that idol producer series right after their most successful comeback thus far, and right before they were working on their first full album... and i still wonder about that, but like... it’s also possible that this is part of the story? like, she probably wanted to go on the show anyway (or something), and then the company and group were like “oh, hmmm, so she’ll be gone for a while huh... well wait a minute... what if we start our new concept... and the story features handong prominently... and her absence will matter to the story” and stuff like that lol. like, which do you think came first? the decision to have a backup dancer wearing a mask to fill in for handong’s parts, or the decision to have gahyeon use masks as a prop, and feature masks a lot in the aesthetics of the video and concept? my guess is that they decided to have a dancer fill in for handong first, and then worked the lore surrounding that into the overall concept. i think the story of the Dystopia era partially started from handong’s absence. holy shit i really think im onto something... i know we all were hoping for some sort of “find the missing handong!” story, and im not sure if this is that, but it really does look to me like she’ll have a big role in the story when she returns, hopefully for their next korean comeback. oooooo i cant wait to see how everything unfolds. i hope she’s doing well

Hey! Folx going to DCC, if you stop by the Rocket Fizz candy store on 15th and Larimar St. with your con badge, you get 10% off your purchase! Cant wait to see yall there!!

monthly reflections are back!!!!!

last year i quickly realized i was not holding onto any lessons. i will remember 2017 as the most transformative year of my life, for several special reasons, but i think most of it relates the the fact i documented every sad moment, happy moment, lessons and stories. i was so in tune with what Jesus was showing me all the time, and where i wanted to grow and invest and retain. last year this happened in moments, but i sadly see most of it as a wash that i can’t remember. so, here’s another year of pushing for growth in the most realistic and tangible way i can.

january 2019- im calling you free. 

january is always the most special because of the way it starts. its not really a fresh slate, but it feels like it. lots of people are motivated to start new things, wrap up bad things, and move into the person they want to be. and i get to specially focus on Jesus in all of this because i spend days fulfilled by the Holy spirit at passion. this year i was reminded of the beauty of faith and the beauty of our father. wait- freedom and faith and father maybe this was just an f month. wait that doesn’t sound too good. 

the happy of this month was just that. i felt really capable to live in faith in Jesus. i honestly learned that this can only be done by completely leaning on him and letting him lead me. by knowing God as my loving and teaching father. faith is the word of the year and i can’t wait to see the lessons entwined in that.

friendships were sweet this month. i have found rest in so many of my gals- kara and sara obviously, julia and sarah always, ally for a refreshment of the spirit, sarah barb and sarah simm for moments of sweet joy in life. i cant think about the moments that are beginning to be counted down, so for now i am enjoying the ease of these friendships.

workwise, i became a work horse hehe. worked and trained SO much. school is HARD and im not doing that too well oops. committed to a grad school physically that i may not actually go to and i got to interview at the school that i have dreamed of for years now. things are coming to fruition and boy, after these stupid ex phys classes i am excited to jump into classes that were like my anatomy and psych classes- the ones i have fun studying for and rememeber because i am so interested. 

the stressors of the month were all in money. Jesus set up some precautions to not let this overwhelm me- dcc’s series was based around the idea of managing the money God has gifted us, and i got a finances book that i at first scoffed at for christmas, but it was another reminder that Jesus knew this was going to be my stress and he prematurely planned for it! growing up stinks and right now i hate money but praying for trust in Jesus in this.

okay i think thats all for now. here’s to february and resting in the lessons and pushing for new ones!!!!! this was fun i missed doing this (: