South Park: SU
Since there are people who grew up with South Park and people who grew up with Steven Universe, I've figured "Why not combine the two?"
Now, in this universe, the Creators of South Park are in the positions of the Diamonds. Brian Graden is practically the "most important piece" of South Park.
How? Simple. It all started in 1995, Graden hired Matt Stone and Trey Parker to create a video Christmas card thanks to their animated short "The Spirit of Christmas".
Now, I'm not calling the creators "evil" because they're supposed to represent the Diamonds.
With that set in mind (pun intended), I hope you all enjoy...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
[Setting: interior; Culver, Los Angeles, CA. Stan, Kyle, Kenny, Cartman, Butters, and Dovahkiin are at the entrance of the front gate. Kyle notices how nervous Dovahkiin appears to be.]
Kyle: Are you sure you wanna go through this?
Dovahkiin: I'm sure, Kyle. Besides, there has to be a reason why my Powers only work on Facebook and Instagram. I just... want to know.
Kyle: Okay, dude. Remember, it's never too late to back out if you're not feeling well.
Cartman: Kahl, what about you?
Kyle: What about me, fatass?
Cartman: Well, you seem a bit flushed. Maybe it's a side effect of having sand in your va-
Kyle: CARTMAN, SHUT THE [bleep] UP!!
[Almost as if on cue, the gate opens. The South Park preteens hesitate to enter, but they eventually do. As they walked inside the building, they were a little bit weirded out that there were multiple drawings of them on the walls.]
Stan: The hell?
Dovahkiin: Are these more Yaoi fanarts?
Kyle: Well, some of them are, but they look professionally drawn.
Kenny: What the [bleep] is this place?
[Suddenly, a couple of voices from one room.]
Mr. Parker: Holy shit, dude.
Mr. Stone: I know, right? It's as if Walt Disney heard Mickey's voice for the first time.
Stan: Who the hell are you guys?!
Mr. Parker: Duh, we're you're creators!
Mr. Stone: And your voice actors.
Kyle: So, you're both God?
Cartman: Oh-ho-ho, Kahl. You're going straight to hell for being Jewish!
Mr. Stone: Nah, he's safe.
Mr. Parker: Besides, Cartman. The seat we saved for you would be too big for him.
Cartman: AYE!
Mr. Stone and Mr. Parker: *laughs*
Mr. Parker: Now, which one of you guys asked about "Yaoi fanarts"?
Dovahkiin: *slowly raises his hand* Uh... I did, sir.
Mr. Parker: Oh my god... There he is, our pride and joy wrapped in a shy and thoughtful package! Dovahkiin Jarvis-Affini!
Dovahkiin: Y-you knew my parents?
Mr. Stone: Actually, that's a funny story. You see-
Mr. Parker: We actually have a "Chris" and "Kelly" who works with us! They tried really hard to have kids, but they couldn't. So, we made it up for them by making a South Park version of them and you!
Dovahkiin: *astonished* Wow... So, I really am that important?
Mr. Parker: Of course, kiddo! So, what brings you hear?
Kyle: Wait, didn't you text us this location?
Mr. Stone: We used to do that for our True Fans, but we stopped when middle schoolers became our fans.
[When Kyle shows the Creators the text, their eyes widen in shock...]
Mr. Parker: That is not our text.
Dovahkiin: Who's is it?
Mr. Stone: There's only one person that texts that perfectly.
Butters: Who?
Mr. Parker: Exec. Graden.
[Beat.]
Stan: Who?
Mr. Stone: He's our Media Executor. He's one of the two reasons why we have paychecks.
Dovahkiin: What's the other reason?
Mr. Parker: Our fans. No, our true fans. You see, the reason why we created you guys was because you reminded us of our childhood. Example? Kenny, you reminded us of our childhood friend who always wore an orange hoodie due to being poor and would mostly skip school.
Mr. Stone: *laughs* Yeah, whenever the teachers would ask about his whereabouts, we would go "Kenny died"! *laughs some more*
[As the group laughs about it, an average-looking man makes his way to them, sporting what looks like the Joker from Batman smiles normally.]
Exec. Graden: What is going on, Parker? Stone?
Mr. Stone: N-nothing, sir.
Exec. Graden: Nothing "what"?
Mr. Stone: Uh, sorry! Nothing, "sir".
Exec. Graden: That's better. *notices Dovahkiin* Who let this background character into this building?
Dovahkiin: "Background character"...?
Kyle: Uh, you did? You sent us the coordinates!
Exec. Graden: Oh, right. The social medias...
Dovahkiin: Um, excuse me. What did you mean when you called me a "background character"?
Mr. Parker: Kid, no!
Exec. Graden: I mean, you weren't supposed to have a life like the rest of the main and supporting cast. You were supposed to blend into the background.
Dovahkiin: *taken aback* B-but, my parents... They-
Exec. Graden: Background characters, too. *looks at the Creators* I suppose this was your doing, correct?
Dovahkiin: *to Mr. Parker* You knew about this?
Mr. Parker: *feels guilt* We didn't know...
Mr. Stone: *looks away in shame* ...how to tell you.
[This type of news broke Dovahkiin. He thought that he was almost like the chosen one (but without the "getting nailed" part). Cartman noticed Dovahkiin's broken state and did something that nobody would've guessed...]
Cartman: Okay, that's enough. Dovah has been through a lot, give him a break.
Exec. Graden: Eric Theodore Cartman being respectful? Oh no, we can't have that. *snaps his fingers, Cartman falls limp*
Kyle: *stunned* Eric...?
Exec. Graden: Kyle Broflovski being concerned for Archie Bunker Jr.? Oh no, we can't have that. *snaps his fingers, Kyle falls limp*
Butters: Leave them alone!
Exec. Graden: Leopold Stoch being supportive of his bullies? Oh no, we can't have that. *snaps his fingers, Butters falls limp*
Stan: *looks at Dovahkiin, who's still broken* Come on, Dovah! Do something!
Exec. Graden: Stanley Marsh forgetting that he's a main character? Oh no, we can't have that. *snaps his fingers, Stan falls limp* Now, we- Wait... Where's the running gag in the orange hoodie?
Mr. Stone: By the time you got here, Kenny got bored, took a bottle of my dad's glaucoma medicine, got [bleep]ed up, placed his tongue in an electric pencil sharpener, bled out, and died.
Mr. Parker: Holy shit, you saw that?
Mr. Stone: Didn't need to. Mr. Stough texted a photo with a description of it. *shows it to them*
Dovahkiin: *snaps out of it, looks around, then at them* Why...? Why are you guys doing this to us?
Exec. Graden: Why? To get back to the drawing board, of course. During the first season of South Park, it was just a TV show about kids being neglected by their parents until something bad happened. Now, every episode has gone so political, that one would think that it airs on the same channel as FOX News! *sighs as he collects himself* But now, that'll all change. Parker, Stone, bring the background character to me.
[They hesitate, but...]
Dovahkiin: *looks up at them*
Mr. Parker: Sorry, kid.
Mr. Stone: But, he's the reason why our kids have stuff and food.
[After snapping his fingers ambidextrously, he aims both of his index fingers at Dovahkiin, and pulls him apart via "the Force". Instead of forcing his existence to disappear, something else happens...
Instagram!Dovahkiin, Facebook!Dovahkiin, and husk!Dovahkiin floats for a bit. Then, husk!Dovahkiin falls limp; barely alive. Instagram!Dovahkiin and Facebook!Dovahkiin both look at each other in wondered awe and at husk!Dovahkiin with a perplexed expression then shares the same worrisome expression with the Creators.]
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
And that's only the first part of "South Park Meets the Creators".
I'm aware that it does contain OOC with Cartman and Kyle, but this does happen when the South Park kids are now preteens; despite them being fictional, people can change as they get older.
2 notes
·
View notes