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7wanderingpaws · 4 years

Text

Simply, yours (10)

Pairing: Baekhyun x reader

Genre: family AU, hapkido teacher AU, PhD AU

Word count: 6.5K

Warnings: cursing

A/N: Hello, hi! Welcome back! This chapter has a LOT of stuff happening... But at the end of the day, we all want to have a pleasant read, right? I hope you will like this one, I enjoyed writing it a whole lot... 😊💖 Pls let me know what you thought, it helps me so much! Have a good day/night! ^^ Btw what did you think of BBHs cover of BoA? I LOVE IT! Original was already so good and he just made it more speacial by adding his sweet flavor... 💕

tags: @milky-baek @itsbaekhyunsbutt @luvhtears @shesdreaminginoverdose @cynthbee @jummyjammy @junmyeonnoona (if you want to be tagged/untagged please let me know!)

MASTERLIST

1 . 2 . 3 . 4 . 5 . 6 . 7 . 8 . 9 . 10

Stupid, stupid, stupid.

That was what you've been muttering to yourself for the past two hours on your way back home and basically ever since you turned your back on him. Literally. Because you are that bad at controlling your emotions for some reason.

So as a way to punish yourself, you ended up popping into the nearest convenience store to your apartment and getting chocolates and sweet bakery because you… needed it. You had been dying to put something sweet into your mouth, so it could be hardly taken as a punishment, but you did find it as unnecessary expense, plus you were already halfway through looking like an elephant. But wow, what a sucky day, yucks.

It was one thing to be a little jealous about that girl, and a completely different thing to become cold towards Baekhyun and not even tell him what was bothering you. He didn't deserve that and you felt extremely guilty, to the point that you just entered your quiet, loving home and felt like crying like a baby.

Changing into comfy clothes, you didn't even bother with folding them, instead throwing them into the laundry basket, too preoccupied with your own guilt. Plus, your sweat pants felt tighter and uncomfortable around your thighs. How annoying. You needed to spend even more money now for the stupid XXXXXL size that you were slowly becoming.

You could bet that Jiyoung girl had the smallest size waist-

“Ah, stop it!” you shouted into nothing, tired of yourself and the whirlwind of emotions that you became. How was it possible to switch between emotions this fast? Your period wasn't the kindest but thankfully it was rarely painful and you only had terrible cravings instead of mood swings but this pregnancy was too much.

And in that moment, everything was getting on your nerves. You losing your job. You wanting to surprise your boyfriend. Him smiling like that at another woman. Him smiling. Seriously, why was he even smiling?! You weren't even there, so how dared he smile? Oh, and yeah that woman next to your man! You declining his request to stay until he was done. You should have stayed. You should have stayed and support him, enjoy the way he was doing his passion and maybe you would have understood what that Jiyoung girl was doing. Was she even a student?

You sighed. You wouldn't know. If she would have been a student, you didn't think she would dare to come collect him from his girlfriend like that.

You threw yourself into the softness of your pillows, chocolate bar in your mouth as you took a small bite and let your angry tears fall. This was so not you. This wasn't the strong, independent woman and if you would keep up this game, Baekhyun would notice too. He would see the faults in you.

“Stop thinking, you brat,” you warned yourself. “Stop it! Don't think! Just don't!”

And the worst?! You couldn't even touch your bump in that moment, you were that disgusted. It was all fault of the babies; they were making you like this, creating problems where there weren't any!

Before you could wallow even more, your phone rang. Scrambling quickly to get it in hopes to see Baekhyun's photo as your caller ID, you were surprised to see your mother's name dancing on the screen. That could only mean some bad news as you rarely talked. The last time you talked was nearly a month ago when she was checking up on you and your pregnancy and making sure Baekhyun was there for you.

Ignoring the way your hands were shaking, you answered the phone, feeling a bit of adrenaline rush in your blood causing slight dizziness. It'd been a while you felt lightheaded like this.

“Mum?”

“Hi, daughter,” she gasped, her voice gentle as always. “How are you? It's been a month almost, thought I'd check up on you.”

And there it all went. You started to wail at that question right away, unable to bear your mother's gentle voice. You didn't even realize how much you missed having a mother figure in this period of life, when she could give you advice, guidance and especially deep understanding.

“Are you crying?” she quipped, surprised at the sniffles that would soon follow with stifled sobs. “Oh, my, why are you crying? Is it the hormones?”

Well, was it the hormones? you asked yourself, but you were so incredibly clueless and so incredibly frustrated because of everything that you couldn't get a proper reply. “Ye-yes,” you hiccuped as hot tears streamed down your face. It was that type of crying where you just couldn't stop, the hysterical sobs needing to be let out, tears seeming to have an infinite storage somewhere inside of you.

Your mother sighed, but you imagined her affectionate gaze. “I understand. Although I don't know to what extent is having three babies burdening, any pregnancy is extremely difficult on your body, honey. Just let it all out and don't dwell too much on what is the reason. You don't need it now, so just let it out.”

At that you had to hide your face in the pillow and let out a little wail, because her words were warming you up so much, yet she was far away from you. Oh, dear, she had no clue what a rollercoaster of a ride you had put yourself and your boyfriend through, so you basically had every reason to have these feelings. She didn't even know you had been sacked. That was the reason you were crying, right?

“Is Baekhyun there?” your mother kept on going when she knew you wouldn't give her a coherent answer.

You hiccuped again, trying to make your mouth move. “N-no. Wo-worki-ing.”

“It's almost late evening, though,” she muttered to herself.

It was just 6pm, but the elders always had the specialty of saying “it's late in the night” when it was barely 8pm. You tried to smile at her antics, but it was painful. Because your boyfriend wasn't home. He was at that stupid training of his with stupid women that had to take the stupid hapkido class.

“What did you have for lunch-”

“I got sacked today,” you blurted suddenly and sniffed back big time, not even listening to her words.

“What do you mean you got sacked today?”

“Just exactly what I said. I am jobless.”

“How did you get sacked? You were promoted not long ago.”

You let out a loud breath, your lungs aching from all the crying. It just made more tears well up in your eyes again. “I had an idiot of a boss.” You should have definitely said it was all your fault, but currently you were feeling like the biggest loser in the world. “So it was better like this anyway. I can't even do much, soon I will be huge and… useless.”

Your mother tsked disapprovingly as you heard some shuffling in the background. “What is this silly talk, daughter. What did Baekhyun say?”

You gritted your teeth. “Why do you always ask about him?! He was happy I got sacked, okay?”

“Alright, alright, no need to shout at your mother.”

“But I don't want to talk about Baekhyun right now, so stop asking me!”

“Oh, I understand now,” she replied back nonchalantly, and some creaking noise provided just the perfect background. “As long as you think you can manage…”

“Yes, I can manage.”

“You and Baekh-”

“Don't.”

She sighed and you heard fire. She was probably warming up dinner in the kitchen. “Did he do something?”

You opened your mouth to retort but were stopped, because YES was your personal answer but NO was the fact. You wiped your tears quickly. “No. I mean... “ you trailed off and rolled yourself on your back, staring at the ceiling. “No.”

“Well then why are you so sensitive? I am trying to see what is wrong and you clearly have an issue with him. You can tell me honestly. Or don't.”

Just then you heard the code being typed in the entrance door, sign of Baekhyun arriving. You groaned loudly and stood up quickly to close the bedroom door before he could get in and have an easy access to bedroom but it was a wrong idea. Seeing black spots everywhere, you felt like your entire body just gained another 40 kilograms as an invisible weight pulled down on your shoulders making you stumble back into the mattress, the world spinning with along with you rather fast.

“I'll call you back,” you murmured softly into the phone and threw it away into the blanket somewhere, trying to make your head calm down.

Baekhyun called out your name, announcing his arrival but you felt like throwing up. You groaned as quietly as possible, scrunching up your face in hopes of stopping this terrible attack. Cold sweat made its way down your neck and you shivered as you felt a huge bulge in your stomach. But you were so extremely disoriented you could barely open your eyes let alone make it to the bathroom in time.

“Baekhyun,” you called out, “please bring me the bucket from the-” gulp, gulp, gulp.

Baekhyun walked into the bedroom but when he saw you his eyes went wide. “What is wrong? Hey, hey, what's- shit,” he cursed when he heard the familiar noise, and ran to the bathroom to get the little pink bucket as you gagged, trying to get on your fours, looking extremely shaken up. Tears were streaming down your face, your knees and arms trembling violently before you saw two feet clad in white socks and then bucket pushed into your face as Baekhyun reached for you with his other hand to keep your balance up. “Shh, c'mon, let it out. Don't keep it back,” he murmured urgently and sweeped the hair that was plastered to your forehead and cheeks away, noticing the snot and flushed cheeks. Just then, finally, you let it all out. Your throat was on fire but your head kept pulling you in one direction into which you would have easily fell if it weren't for the safety of Baekhyun's arms. “Shh, you're doing well.”

Although not seeing his face, you knew he was tense and probably wondering what made you this terribly sick when food and spit kept constantly coming out until it became just violent gagging, nothing able to come out anymore, only caused by your head spinning so much it triggered your stomach. Wasn't it just today that you were thankful for not having to go through this again?

You calmed down after another couple of minutes, completely spent. “Baekhyun,” you murmured, afraid to open your eyes. He hummed as he took the bucket to the side, and looked at you closely as he brought his other hand to your pale face, wiping the tears away. “I'm very dizzy.”

“Look at me, baby,” he murmured, frowning a little and wanting to check the focus in your eyes.

You shook your head ever so gently before your lower lip trembled. “I can't… please,” you said just as you were about to crash on him again, the invisible pull still there.

“Okay. Lay down for me, can you do that?” he asked gently. “I will help you move now, don't get startled.” And he did so, pushing on your shoulders a bit, helping you lie down. He took all the pillows on the bed and put your head under them, by then knowing very well what to do when you got into this kind of situation. “Keep your head up for me, and your knees too,” he whispered and patted your straightened-out legs. You did as he said and heard him move around the room before he came back with the little machine, pushing your arm through the hole to measure your blood pressure.

“Don't cry, sweetheart,” you heard him whisper as he tried to catch every single teardrop while the machine was working. He looked around for a glass of water which, of course, you didn't have.

“I feel like hell,” you said, your voice raw.

Baekhyun was thankful your eyes were closed, for he didn't want you to witness how worried and scared he was. Yes, you did get dizzy and many times sick, but to this extent? Never. He was already thinking three steps ahead, fishing his phone out of his pocket.

Beeping sound brought you back to the reality and Baekhyun checked, murmuring the results out loud, his frown now deep. “We are going to the hospital,” he decided.

“No!” you shouted, opening your eyes to look at him but you almost saw three Baekhyuns. Usually, you wouldn't mind but it made you want to throw up again. You were fast to close them, scrunching your face. “Please,” you sobbed, scared. “Make it stop! But don't call anyone!”

Baekhyun was already calling ambulance, leaving the room in case you would have a tantrum. He knew your blood pressure was skyrocketing and it made him worried sick; he didn't know what to do. Plus, he was told by your doctor that if your blood pressure reaches a certain level, you were eligible to call for ambulance.

As much as he hated you crying and going through this, he was there with you, every single step at a time.

“She will be alright,” said the doctor that was in the emergency room, checking your vitals on his clipboard. “She needs to rest for now, but,” he shook his head gently and looked up at Baekhyun whose eyes were bulging in fear of what was to come. “Her blood pressure was too high. It isn't good for the patient, neither it is good for the pregnancy.”

“What does that mean?”

He shrugged. “Well, it is very likely that she will have to endure this until she gives birth. Triplet pregnancy is a bit different than the usual ones. Since premature birth is highly possible to happen, which also may affect the health of the children, her not monitoring stress levels or taking good care of her body may also influence the health of the kids.” He sighed. “She is bearing a lot right now, so there are high risks of her fainting if this continues. As you told me, she had been struggling with high blood pressure this whole time, correct?”

Baekhyun nodded quickly.

“Well, she is in the fifteenth week which means almost half-way through till due date… It should have subsided by now but we can't do anything to change it; only give medication, unfortunately. Multiples' pregnancy is full of surprises.”

Baekhyun felt so helpless in that moment. Why did he get the feeling the doctor was clueless in a way too?

“Will she survive?” he asked seriously.

The doctor smiled gently. “She is completely healthy, so there is no risk of her losing her life, but this was definitely a dangerous situation. She shouldn't be left alone for too long as this occurs unexpectedly. It is rare anyway to have such strong reaction to high blood pressure, but this is what it takes to live for three more lives, I suppose.”

Oh, how Baekhyun wished he could take at least half of the burden you were bearing.

The doctor patted him twice on the shoulder before leaving. He looked at you, your sleeping figure so peaceful compared to couple of hours ago when you looked white as death and just about to pass out.

Sighing, he reached for your hand, gently squeezing it before murmuring a soft I love you. You were going through all of this because of him. He made you pregnant and now here you were, fighting for four lives: the unborn babies and your own.

His phone vibrating was what interrupted his train of thoughts. Quickly searching for it in his winter jacket, he saw your mother's name flashing on the screen, bad feeling already eating him away. Should he tell her where you were now? He would only make her worried.

“Hello, mother,” he answered, trying to make his voice as normal and even as possible while stroking your knuckles with is thumb.

“Oh, thank God you picked up, Baekhyun! I've been contacting my daughter for the past hour and she wouldn't answer. Are you with her now?”

Gulping, he said: “Yes. She is, uh, sleeping now.”

“Silly girl. I called her earlier today to check up on her and caught her in a bad state of mind,” she explained, her voice sounding exasperated. “She kept crying but wouldn't tell me why. This is none of my business, my dear, but did you two have a fight?”

Surprised was an understatement to Baekhyun. First of all, you didn't necessarily fight, it was your weird mood that created negative tension between you two but it was certainly not a fight; second of all he had no clue you were having such a mood prior to his arrival although he did see your swollen face and eyes. “No, we didn't have a fight. She has been acting strangely today, that is true. She lost her job and maybe the hormones and all…” he trailed off, trying to justify your actions though he himself wasn't sure.

“Yes, she told me she lost her job, but to me it didn't seem like that was her main issue. Let me be honest with you, Baekhyun,” she said and Baekhyun didn't have a good feeling about what was to come. “She didn't even want to hear your name. I don't know what exactly happened between you two, but it would be healthy if you both talk. You know she cannot get this upset while being pregnant. She was choking on her own sobs.”

Baekhyun closed his eyes and left your hand so he could pinch the bridge of his nose. Just what the hell was up with you? “She came to visit me at the university today, but she had such a change of mood, mother. I was shocked myself and I try to understand, I really do but it has been difficult recently.” Let alone she was lying to me, he thought but kept quiet.

Your mother sighed again; she trusted Baekhyun and wasn't doubtful about him at all. She also knew what pregnancy mood swings meant, so she was not blaming entirely you just as she knew Baekhyun could have been falsely accused. She knew him ever since he was a baby after all. “I understand, sweetie, and I am not blaming you at all. I will let you rest. I know you also don't have it easy, dear,” she added, affection lacing her voice, “so please I just ask you to have some patience with her for now. She can be a handful.”

“I do, mother, you know I do,” replied Baekhyun right away, looking at your sleeping face. “I can't get mad at her even if I want to.”

At that she laughed. “My sweet boy. I hope I can call you my son-in-law very soon.”

“Actually yes. Sooner than later.”

You found yourself seated on the wooden bench, a book about multiples' pregnancy perched on your thighs while you tried hard not to stare at your boyfriend clad in his hapkido uniform.

He was currently leading his class with Jiyoung, the girl because of whom it all went downwards. Bitterly, you stopped yourself from blaming it on someone like her. It wasn't her fault. Why, you ask? Because…

Few days ago

“Can you explain to me what happened on Monday?” murmured Baekhyun as you were both lying in bed, the dimmed light on his side still on, as he just finished going through his notes from the previous lectures. It made you resent yourself even more knowing how much he had on his plate, yet you couldn't even control your emotions as soon as he stood next to a pretty lady or he looked at you weirdly.

You sighed, rubbing your temple as you were lying on your back. Baekhyun turned his head to look at you, pausing, contemplating. Then, he slowly changed positions, lying on his right side, his hand slowly dragging on the surface of the mattress, reaching your hip and sliding it up over your belly that was sticking out, giving it gentle rubs as he waited patiently for you to talk.

“I won't get mad,” he had the need to add which made you scoff, and him chuckle.

“It's so fucking stupid, Baekhyun, and don't say I can't swear while being pregnant.”

He frowned gently. “Well, it obviously made you upset,” he argued, “so it cannot be fucking stupid.”

He saw you gritting your teeth, and he slid his gaze over your profile, how the light was illuminating the part of your face to which he was turned to. He honestly thought you looked breathtaking and would have kissed you whole night if it weren't for the confusion he was currently feeling. In that moment, he wanted answers more than anything.

“What is Jiyoung-” you trailed off and Baekhyun raised an eyebrow, “to you? To your class? To… hapkido?” Asking, instead of answering him. Great. Although, you weren't expecting silence that followed. You imagined him chuckling at your ridiculousness but he didn't. He didn't and it almost made you lose yourself once again, but he spoke: “She is a master like me,” he spoke softly, and you focused on his warm hand sliding over your belly. You turned your head a little to catch his gaze that was already burning holes on your face. “I didn't tell you until I was sure, which I became on Monday, but then things happened…”

“Sure about what?”

“I am leading the hapkido universiade team with her, but I am the main master,” he revealed, his face still in a gentle frown. “She was assigned to do it together with me, so that is why she was there during practice, too. And she will be from now on until July.”

“But is she like a teacher at Sungkyunkwan or something?”

He shook his head. “She is from Kyunghee university where she is the head of department. There was a joint alliance with them for the hapkido team and also, if we win this, I might have a chance to work with the National team later on,” he explained patiently, not tearing his gaze away from yours.

So many things you were founding out, so many good news. That meant Jiyoung was older than Baekhyun! That was definitely good news! And you ruined it all on Monday and you completely misunderstood the entire situation.

“Baekhyun,” you whispered, closing your eyes. Humming in response, he now caressed your cheek, his thumb making slow circles. “I'm so sorry. For being the way I was. What you just said,” you stuttered, opening your eyes, urgency in them, “is all amazing news and I couldn't be any more proud of you.”

“Shh, it's okay, princess,” he whispered, scooting closer to your side.

“No,” you shook your head, “I thought… I was… jealous, so jealous. I shouldn't have let the emotions control me like that. I shouldn't have just left you like that. I apologise,” you said sincerely, staring into his eyes that were now casted in shadow as he was with his back towards the light. Yet, the burning behind his eyes could hardly go unnoticed by you.

“You are so mean when you are jealous,” he blurted, intending to make you chuckle which he succeeded in, but then it disappeared just as quickly and you nudged his cheek with your nose to get more out from him. He sighed, eventually. “You know you can trust me, right? You know I would never want to lose your trust despite you lying to me.”

At that, you whimpered, pouting and widening your eyes at him, still terribly ashamed for what you had done.

“It's okay, I am not holding grudges,” he insisted, “but you know I can't stand you not trusting me, hm? I already know I want to spend the rest of my life with you and with our kids,” he murmured and at that he caressed the belly yet again as he buried his face in your neck, sending goosebumps down your spine. “So why do I have a feeling you keep doubting me?”

You stiffened, but his caresses didn't cease, which meant he wasn't upset. You raised your hand, playing with his hair as you mumbled: “No, I don't doubt you at all. It's the hormones. It's the babies. You know that before getting pregnant we were just fine.”

“I know,” he whispered, his hot breath fanning the skin on your pulse point, “it is always the babies fault, right?”

“Please.”

“Please, what?” he asked, curious as he pulled back to look at your face.

“Just… I apologise, Baekhyun.”

His eyes searched your gaze. “And I forgive you. But you need to promise me you won't get so worked up over nothing in the future.”

“I won't.”

“By nothing I mean anything. If it isn't a life or death situation, I don't want you to pay it too much attention.”

You watched his mouth move as he spoke, going on about what the doctor said, what the books said about triplet pregnancy, what he thought would be the best for you. And you tried to listen, you really did, but you were head over heels for him; he was mesmerizing and he understood your crazy whirlwind of emotions, and you loved him. So much.

“Are you listening?” he asked, snapping his fingers two times in front of your face. “Young lady, you keep zoning out on me.”

You smiled at his playful manner and he reciprocated the gorgeous grin as he leaned in closer. “I am listening, I am. I just realised once again how much I love you, Baekhyun.”

His grin turned into an affectionate, lopsided smile and he eyed your lips before flicking his orbs back to yours, murmuring your name. “And I love you. Do you understand? I love you. Only you. Can you actually understand?”

“No,” you whispered, dreamy look on your face as you were bewitched by him. He shook his head, and reached for your face, brushing the baby hair out of your forehead. “It's difficult to get it through my thick head that someone like you loves someone like me.”

“How would I make you understand then?”

“Show me. I want you to kiss me, it's been too long.”

He leaned in more, his eyes constantly flicking between your lips and your eyes as he muttered with narrowed eyes: “You're horny again, aren't you?”

You let out a breathy laugh as you sneaked your hands around his neck, bringing him closer. “For you? Always.”

He chuckled just as he kissed you, smiling widely into your mouth before playing with your lower lip, going straight for a gentle bite that he knew would ignite the fire in you.

“Are we doing another make-up sex?” he murmured between kisses, slowly climbing over you and you gladly widened your legs for him.

“Uh-uh, you're making love to me because you need to show me you love me.”

He kissed your neck, laughing quietly. “You're shameless.”

“So are you. Now, do your magic, honey.”

And now here you were, as per his order, watching him. As you would be every week whenever he wasn't home. If he could have, he would have dragged you to all his lectures as well, but you managed to talk him out of it. Honestly, you didn't mind this at all, as you really enjoyed observing him teaching hapkido and doing all the cool moves he was so smooth at doing. It was true you would get tired and wooden bench was only so comfortable for you to sit through couple of hours.

During the break, Baekhyun jogged to you with an energetic smile and leaned in to give you a quick peck. “You good over here?” he asked as his team erupted in big laughters, everyone enjoying their break time.

You beamed up at your boyfriend. “Yes, all fine.”

He smiled even wider at that, ruffling your hair as he looked down on the book in your lap. “Is it any good?”

“Well, for sure although I'm learning some disturbing stuff,” you muttered, worry flashing through your eyes that made Baekhyun raise his eyebrows.

“We will finish in 50 minutes and then you can tell me all about it, how is that?” he asked gently, and grabbed your cheeks to observe you closer.

You giggled and he seemed satisfied. “Alright, let's do that.”

He was just leaning in for another kiss when someone cleared their throat muttering a little excuse me, making Baekhyun move away from you. “Jiyoung.”

“Sorry to disturb, but I think it would be better if we stay longer today. For practice, I mean,” she said, her eyes wandering over to you and a bit lower, obviously looking at the baby bump. She snapped her eyes back at Baekhyun's questioning face. “It's better if we start going through basic kicks now, just so the kids can remember each technique correctly and from then build on it.”

You watched Baekhyun's back, but he was relaxed. “The kids are black belts, 4-5 dans in at least, though,” he replied diplomatically, “I don't see the point in going through basic kicks. Techniques should come to them as second nature by now.”

“I still think we should start having longer practices,” she insisted. “So your girlfriend might be a bit uncomfortable sitting here for such a long time.”

Wow, you thought, she was actually dragging you into this somehow. Interesting.

“I don't mind,” you heard yourself say before you could think twice. “So do whatever you deem correct.”

“Not today, no,” Baekhyun decided. “After December we will be good with longer practices if necessary,” he emphasized. “If we don't slack off, we can manage just fine.”

She gave a confident smile. “Alright then. I suppose you won't mind if we start the class now.”

What a bitch, you thought again.

“I won't mind. You may start,” was Baekhyun's curt nod and he turned around to face you, his actions heating your cheeks up as he crouched in front of you and took your hands in his before bringing them up to his lips.

“Alright, master.” And she was gone.

“What are you doing?” you whisper-shouted, but the excited glint in your eyes told Baekhyun you loved what he just pulled.

“Prioritizing you.”

You smiled graciously, and leaned in, pecking his lips.

Couple of weeks went by, you following Baekhyun to his practice, while you were found your way back to knitting that you so diligently used to do when you were younger, your mum teaching you as a little girl. Trying hard not to sound annoyed or desperate for any activity, you made sure you were always smiling and at peace in your mind. You promised your boyfriend you would look after yourself and that was what you had been trying to do. You even managed to sell some of the scarfs and gloves you knitted, given it was now nearing the end of December.

You smiled up at Baekhyun who dismissed the class, not waiting until Jiyoung and the students leave. “Ready to go?”

“Yes,” he replied, some perspiration on his forehead glistening in the practice room. “Can't wait to have a rest.”

You stood up to your feet slowly, minding your blood pressure, and reached for a handkerchief before grabbing his hand so he wouldn't move away. “Let me,” you murmured as you reached up and tapped the textile gently along his hairline.

His eyes focused down on you, affection and love melting his features into the softest smile. “Thank you.”

“We don't want daddy to catch a cold, right?” you chirped enthusiastically.

Baekhyun quirked an eyebrow at you, never hearing the nickname leave your mouth before. You would always get extremely embarrassed when he called you mummy, so this was a new discovery. “Yeah, otherwise how would daddy protect mummy, hm?”

Just as expected, you grew red in your face and quickly looked around, making sure no one was too near to overhear.

“What? You started,” he laughed quietly before leaning in to kiss your cheek, leaving it with a loud smooch and moisture on your skin. “Mummy.”

Your eyes widened and you laughed along with him before he moved to pack up his stuff. All the students who were now leaving farewelled cheerfully, always enjoying how flustered you would get from the attention, because master Baekhyun's girlfriend is so cute! and of course, he would encourage them, showing you off, which always warmed your heart.

“Not tired?”

You turned to the right to see Jiyoung approaching, a glass bottle in her hand as her high ponytail swung with each step she made. “I'm okay, thank you. Aren't you tired?”

“Nope,” she said, the p sound bopping like a bubble. “Master Baekhyun has been a bit slacking off with the workouts, eh?” she chuckled, nudging Baekhyun who was putting on his jacket with her elbow.

“Well, I can always make it especially hard for you, Jiyoung,” was his confident reply.

Oh my god, he was so hot you actually had to cross your legs while standing.

She smirked. “I would love to finally find out what does this especially hard mean, master.”

Well, you definitely didn't find her confidence hot. If anything, you wanted to warn her not to challenge Baekhyun too much.

“Alright, especially hard it is then,” he concluded just as he zipped up his jacket and took his gym bag, slugging it over his shoulder.

Jiyoung's eyes sparked with excitement, you could see that. It was always there, actually. Coming to the practices with him for two weeks, you kind of learnt to read her. She was a professional, you knew that much. She wasn't openly hitting on your boyfriend, no. It was in these subtle talks that irked you because you couldn't do anything about them, just tolerate and trust Baekhyun. Which, he really not once made you doubt - his trust. He would always prove you his love to you, and you to him. It was so obvious. He only had eyes for you.

Even now, as he stood in front of you, touching your hip gently and sliding his hand to your lower back to lead you out and saying his bye to the disappointed face of his hapkido partner, you knew it.

“Baekhyun,” you said once outside on the half-dead campus as you were making your way to the bus stop, the dark sky not showing any clouds which only meant another freezing night.

“Yes, angel.” He intertwined your fingers and pushed the connected hands into his pocket.

“I was thinking… What if I just went home?”

He stopped walking, looking at you a bit taken aback. “What do you mean?”

“I feel a bit useless, you know. But also quite tired from all of this,” you said showing your belly that was sticking out. “So I thought I would visit home.”

“But we have regular check ups at the clinic,” he replied, his eyes wandering over your features. His nose was growing a bit red which you found adorable, which is why you stood on your tippy toes and gave him a little peck on it.

“I know… but if I would miss one appoint-”

“No.”

“Baek-”

“You are not missing an appointment, baby,” he said, this time more sternly as he looked down at you, his hair that was trapped under a red beanie made his soft hair fall into his eyes.

You pressed your lips together, understanding his choice. “So, I would go only for two weeks.”

Something flashed across his eyes, something that you couldn't decipher. “What about me?”

Yes, what about Baekhyun? “You have lots on your plate right now,” you reasoned, squeezing his hand that was trapped in his pocket. “You could study better, and focus more on the practices. And, you could totally go and have a good time with your friends, or even invite them over, hm?”

“You actually think I would let you travel alone? With your blood pressure?”

“C'mon, by KTX it takes an hour and a half and then taxi just twenty minutes out of town.”

You felt like you were contradicting yourself. You, the one who was always trying to save up money was willing to pay a lot just to travel. KTX tickets were already very expensive. Taxis as well. But there was very little public transportation going to your village and you didn't feel like taking it with your big belly.

Baekhyun didn't say anything for a while, just staring at you. “Why this sudden- need?” is what he asked eventually.

“You know I miss mum,” you mumbled, averting your gaze.

“I know it's difficult,” he sighed, the action condensing his breath. “But I can't let you go by yourself, no way. Besides,” he added eagerly, “it's Korean new year soon. Can't you wait just a little longer? We both will be going home for that, you know that.”

He was right. It was literally around the corner.

“It's just in two weeks time, hm?” he asked, quirking his eyebrows at you, pleading to say yes. When he saw you contemplating, he mumbled: “I am not letting you go alone, anyway, so you better agree.”

You huffed in disbelief and dragged him towards the bus stop. “Let's go home. I will think about it.”

“Tomorrow we have a double-date with Chen's, did you forget that too?” he said as he let you drag him after you.

“No, I didn't. I would have gone the day after.”

“Well, you wouldn't leave me alone for such a long time, right?”

That made you stop and turn to him just to witness the puppy eyes and a prominent pout that made you smile softly at him as you walked even closer, resting your forehead on his jacket-clad chest. “I hate even the idea of not being with you for two weeks, Baekhyun.”

“Exactly. So just wait until we can go together, hm? Please? I don't want you to go. I can't even sleep without you anymore.”

You chuckled and leaned back, catching his small smile. “Alright. I think.”

He whined your name before he grabbed you by your waist with his free hand and brought your hips closer as he hovered a bit over you. “Alright, I won't go is what you wanted to say,” he muttered before kissing you hungrily. It was such a contrast; outside, the air was freezing, but your hot mouths pressed together, his body glued to yours as he breathed in loudly before tilting his head, asking for access with his eager tongue was hot, burning up. You moaned quietly, just for him to hear and he growled in response, a satisfactory hum leaving his throat while he circled your tongue, sucking on it, making you gasp because you were in public. He kissed you, and kissed you until you were completely breathless, until you were fully convinced that he didn't want you anywhere far from him. Even if it meant he could focus more on his practice, studies and whatever else you just listed. Even if it meant a short time.

He didn't want you away. And that was final.

#baekhyun fanfiction #baekhyun fluff #baekhyun angst #baekhyun smut #baekhyun fanfic #baekhyun oneshot #baekhyun scenario #exo fanfiction #exo fluff #exo au #baekhyun au #exo angst #exo smut #kpop fanfiction #kpop au #kpop scenario #mywritings

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dazais-guardian-angel · 2 years

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2021 Fanfic Tag Meme

@sixtyfourk tagged me to do this about a week ago; am I only now scrambling to do it in the last few hours of 2021? yes. does that basically sum up my work ethic/productivity in general? unfortunately also yes.

Word Count: 19,423

Words on ao3: 7 oneshots

Pairings written for: none lol

Fandoms written for: Professor Layton, Dai Gyakuten Saiban, and Genshin Impact

Most popular story: So You Never Lie Again, the sole and first Genshin fanfic I wrote this year, which.... well, it’s not at all surprising that one was going to be vastly more popular lol, with such a massive fanbase compared to the other two I wrote for this year. It was a rather spur of the moment story considering that for the most part I’m not invested enough in Genshin to write for it (a lot of what I want to read for that fandom already exists, honestly, and its universe also kinda intimidates the hell out of me), but some of the most recent updates changed that and I do have a few more ideas I want to write for the game in the future.

Funniest story: I.... I don’t think any of these are funny.... I barely write funny things :’D

Story I’m most proud of: Probably Happiness Is..., which is a short, introspective piece about Rupert Chrogray/Ashley Graydon from DGS, my favorite character in the game (duh :P). It’s rather short for me, but I think I did quite a good job at summing up and capturing the beautiful tragedy and complexities of his amazing character in only a few words, and I’m very satisfied with the flow of it and said word choices... With all my stories about him, I want to make people who may have glossed over him before understand what makes him so compelling and sympathetic, and I think I was able to accomplish that perfectly here.

Saddest story: ...probably the aforementioned “Happiness Is”... lol, I mean it does end with me killing Rupert off when he has nothing but regrets, the one time I’ve decided I will ever do that :’)

Least popular story: The Light of Ashen Dreams, but I literally just wrote it on Christmas eve and posted it, and it’s extremely short and hardly my best work, so I’m not surprised lol

Most cringeworthy story: yeah, let’s be honest, it’s the aforementioned “Light of Ashen Dreams” lol (god do I cringe at all my titles in general-) I wrote it on a whim on my phone for about 3 hours Christmas night, having never written a fic on my phone before, and spent a few hours editing it Christmas day before posting it, just because I was frustrated with how long I’d gone without writing anything and wanted to put something up before the end of the year, so... yeah. It was based on an image I’ve had in my head for a long time, so it didn’t come COMPLETELY out of nowhere, but it was still probably rushed, and definitely cheesy smh

Favorite Opening Line(s): The opening of, again, “Happiness Is...”, the first line of which was my basis for the entire fic (along with a doujin on pixiv):

“I simply do what I can. And well, to me, there are some things in life that cannot be bought with money.”

His father had said this, once, when he had asked him how he could go on. Could continue to bear such a miserable existence under such miserable burdens, without even putting up a fight. He had answered without judgement, without patronizing, without a single ounce of naivete; simply stared directly into his eyes with that ever-present, quiet hopefulness, framed by that same, tired smile.

Favorite Closing Lines(s): The ending to my DGS/PL crossover, Like a Flame to a Cold Heart, because something something symbolism about reverting back to your old name something something feels :’)

“…Rupert.”

A hand throws off his hood, sending misty white flying, the other moving to his chest, as he dips into a graceful bow.

“Rupert Milverton.”

Top Scenes from Anywhere You Would Choose to Have Illustrated: The scene that is the main bulk of While You and I, Keep Ourselves Warm... more specifically the hug I guess... I just love Rupert and his dad so so much, I’m dying for more art of them :’) i want to see them happy and soft together... *cries*

Stories I haven’t yet written, but intend to: God, so fucking much. Most ideally, my DGS Gina and Rupert enemies-to-siblings/friends slowburn WIP, that I started earlier this year and already have about 6k of, but then paused in order to wait to play DGS2 in July and then ignored cause of health shit. Something about the Inazuma story arc in Genshin I wanna write, as well as something about the most recent Albedo story developments. Two ideas I have for - god I hate that I’m even saying this - Demon Slayer, focused on Rengoku cause the demon slayer movie is and forever will be the only part of demon slayer i give a shit about. Two ideas I have related to the most recent and now premature final :’) chapter of Tales of Crestoria, and I wanna write more for Crestoria in general. And overall just a lot of vague wanting to write more for DGS and PL in general, cause those are what I focused on the most last year and I definitely have so much more I need to get out about those games.

Fic-writing goals for 2022: write. more. god fuckign damn just write more. My mental health has been so bad this year, due to my physical health sucking and mega anxiety (not just mental anxiety but anxiety affecting my body! which makes my mental health even worse!) and shit with parents, but there was still so much time that I was fine and could have been writing and just. didn’t. because hahahaaa untreated adhd I most certainly do have amiright 👉👉 :’) And I honestly don’t know how to improve on that front, without meds, which I really don’t want because I already take enough freaking meds as it is (and I’m not even officially diagnosed, at any rate), but.... I just... gotta try harder to hold myself accountable and write more.... haaaahhhh.... and also not rely so much on comments to motivate me. My stuff is so niche that it’s never going to get many comments, and I just need to accept that, and not let the lack of them affect me...

Thanks for tagging me, K! I’m not gonna tag anyone cause it’s already basically 2022 fkdls;lkdfglf, but if anyone wants to do, this feel free...!

#tag meme #my writing

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quokkacore · 4 years

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LIBERALITY: starshine [oh sehun] (m)

part II of all your gods are fake

summary: sehun gives you what he can, but it’s never easy. you have to work for it as well, but effort pays off, and he rewards you so kindly.

pairing: freedomfighter!sehun x reader

genre: smut, angst, fluff, light horror towards the end?

warnings: language, descriptions of war, descriptions of cults, mentions of violence, shibari, thigh riding, handjobs, reader has nipple piercings, sensory deprivation (blindfolds and ties), seizures, knives

song rec: rosalia & ozuna - yo x ti, tu x mi ♡ taemin - never forever

word count: 4.3k

a/n: this was originally posted to my old writing blog on may 9th, 2020. if you would like to be on the taglist, pls send me an ask or a message! <3

masterlist

He was getting agitated. You could tell this much.

It was already bad enough that the meeting so far had lasted for over an hour and a half, but now the tension of the situation was finally settling in, as everyone realized that it was finally here.

The last stronghold. Or so they believed. Or so he believed.

The meeting was only for the highest ranking officials of the resistance, people who The Brotherhood knew they could trust—the plan was far too important to risk it falling into the hands of The Sect of Seven at the hands of double agents.

The plan that, if executed correctly, could turn the tides and cause the downfall of the Sect.

You watched, leaning against the wall as Junmyeon, leader of The Brotherhood and face of the resistance towered over the war table, talking about possible strategies to take the last major neutral city and also take control of the country.

The Sect of Seven had existed for years before the war began—its existence spanned across centuries, millenia, even; dating back to the year The Prophecy of Brothers Alike was first proclaimed in the late twelfth century, and remained strong even almost a whole century after The Great Collapse of 2050, when global society had collapsed due to war, famine and climate disasters.

Then the war broke out, some ten years ago, when the first two brothers of the Fated Fourteen first made themselves known, springing the Sect’s violent plans into action.

Since then, the resistance had been built up by The Brotherhood’s efforts, both capturing strategic cities and territories across North America. The Sect was based in the desert, with the Sanctuary based in what was once Los Angeles, their control spanning across what was western Mexico, the american south, and half of the northwest.

The resistance was based higher north, in the Citadel, which used to be Chicago, territories consisting of parts of southern Canada, the rockies, the northern midwest and what remained of the Peninsula of Yucatan. Places like Greenland, the southern east coast and northern canadian territories had either been destroyed during the collapse or had since been reclaimed by extreme climate and nature.

The only major territory that remained uncaptured by either sides, the place where many had fled to avoid getting caught in the crossfire, was the northern west coast, and that was controlled by Washington DC.

The very spot the resistance was now planning to take.

Your eyes floated up towards Sehun, who was standing right next to Junmyeon, who was now listening to Chanyeol and Baekhyun discuss the logistics of a peaceful invasion.

“Overall, I think we still need time to form a solid strategy,” Baekhyun said, “Jongdae needs to get in contact with The Agate Sisters for some more weapons—”

“Which is not very easy, might I add—” Jongdae interjected.

“And even before that…” Junmyeon’s voice was loud, taking command of the situation, “Sehun.”

All eyes in the room fell to the youngest member of The Brotherhood.

Oh Sehun. The Oracle.

Sehun had become known to the world two years after Suho and Junmyeon were proclaimed the first two brothers of the prophecy, the same time as his twin brother. Being so young, his ability of both interpreting and creating prophecies was a sight to behold, both terrifying and morbidly fascinating.

You’d known him since he and his brother were children, before the three of you realized what the future held in store—pain and suffering for Sehun and you, and nothing but pleasure and debauchery for Sehün.

“Do you think you could consult with the spirits for a minor prophecy? Or any other interpretations of the prophecy?”

Sehun shifted in his stance, leaning back and forth. “I need time.” His voice was firm and gravelly as he crossed his arms, immersed in thought. “My most recent auguries have revealed to me that DC is the last stronghold that the prophecy is talking about. But I can’t be a hundred percent sure. Prophecies love to play mind games. We all know that.”

“Is there anything we have to be wary of when it comes to the prophecy? Double entendres, stuff like that?” Yixing asked, even though everyone in the room had heard the god-forsaken prophecy more than enough times throughout the past few years.

Sehun sighed, but closed his eyes and nodded anyway. A dramatic tension settled over the room, and Sehun began to speak.

“Cometh a day when seven sets of twins, be opposite ends of both virtue and sin—why am I going over this again, we all know this,” He huffed.

“Please just continue,” Baekhyun mumbled.

“Ugh, fine. Bearing eyes of blue and eyes of brown, cometh to tear the last stronghold down—” Sehun rolled his eyes, frustration evident in his expression. “The term stronghold has always been somewhat questionable. The prophecy was first declared in 1176, right? Early Modern English wouldn’t become a thing for another three hundred years, so most of this stems from Middle English. Some interpret stronghold as fort, or base, or holy land…”

Jongdae raised his hand before speaking, eyes flashing in alarm as he interrupted Sehun’s tangent. “Wait, wait, if others have translated it as holy land, then—”

“The Sanctuary.”

Junmyeon’s voice was quiet, but still commanded a heavy presence across the room, as a profound silence spread across the space.

“That means that the final battle could be in Los Angeles, on their turf. That would put us at a major disadvantage. We’re already at a major disadvantage.” The leader’s eyebrows were furrowed, using both hands to lean on the table as he made the connection.

The dread that followed was thick and suffocating, and you took the opportunity to speak up, wishing to rid the room of the anxiety gathering.

“But think about the implications of fighting the final battle in The Sanctuary. It would have to mean that we’ve managed to push them back sufficiently to the point where we feel confident invading their home base. Which we wouldn’t do unless we knew that we had a high possibility of winning.”

All eyes fell to you, and you crossed your arms, before meeting Sehun’s gaze. The look in his eyes was something akin to gratitude, being able to lift the sudden darkness. You lifted your hand to gesture back at Sehun. “Continue.”

He nodded, gaze stern. “Perhaps lovers lost to a most wicked brother, bringeth vengeance and hellfire upon one another… Loss could mean one of two things. Betrayal or death. But the rest of those two lines imply that the side that does the taking will suffer because of what they’ve done. That means that for now, none of us lay hands on any of the Sanctuary Queens, and those of us who have them, keep our partners close… Beware ye who heed this, for I warn thee now: suffer shall those who carelessly bow.”

“It has to be them,” A girl, Sasha, declared, “They’ve been lying to their followers for years—”

“That could mean anything. You know that.” Sehun’s voice was rough, eyes trained on the map that had been carved into the table.

A silence hung over the room, tension palpable as everyone remembered what the stakes were. These were lives and people’s free wills on the line, indescribable anguish promised by a prophecy written centuries ago to people who didn’t truly know their leaders. The end was near, but the outcome was nowhere near foreseeable.

“I’ll… I’ll try and do some more smoke readings.” It struck you how tired he sounded, watching as he rubbed his eyes with his thumb and index finger, “Maybe I’ll ask the spirit of the Oracle for a specific prophecy on DC. For now, we just have to be cautious. Watch for any suspicious activity here in the citadel and listen to intelligence reports. Jongin, you’ve got your moles at the Sanctuary, right?”

Jongin nodded, gaze dark. “Yeah. I’m meeting with Ren in two weeks. She’s the best of the best. I’ll see what she has for us.”

Junmyeon straightened his posture, everyone quieting when he opened his mouth to speak.

“I think that’s enough worrying about that for today,” He declared, sounding grim, “Before we go, you all know that not a single word is to leave this room. This is highly classified information. Meeting adjourned.”

You watched everyone file out of the room, hoping to speak to Sehun, yet somehow didn’t catch when he left. You got the feeling that that was what he intended.

So you left too, resolving to see him that night.

—

Sehun’s room was easy to find, seeing as how it was right across the hall from yours, in the large apartment building the heads of the resistance had settled into. You knocked on his door, sighing when you didn’t hear any response. You tried one more time, then another time, finally a third time, before letting your head fall frustratedly against the wood of the door.

“Hun, I know you’re in there… please let me in.”

You heard muffled sounds of shuffling from behind the door, pulling your head away to lean it against the doorframe. Waiting, you strained your ears for a noise, hearing the occasional sound.

Eventually, you heard the telltale sound of heavy footsteps being dragged across the floor. You pursed your lips, waiting for the door to open, wondering what you would see when it did.

The door swung open slowly, and you were met with a tall figure, hunched over as he peered down at you. The exhaustion in his gaze was palpable, and you felt your heart clench in sympathy.

Sehun was 25 now. He was made known to the public some nine years ago, and on top of it all, he was the Oracle. Interpretations of any and all prophecies were up to him, a sixteen year old boy who had just discovered he was destined to spend the rest of his life fighting against his own brother, something that tore his family apart.

He was a child.

And now, here he stood, looking too worn, too hopeless for someone so young. His eyes had seen horrors he was much too young to see. Life had eaten away at the glow he’d had when you were both younger. The dark circles underneath his eyes were so pronounced, you’d think he hadn’t slept since he was a baby. His short, dark hair was greasy. You wondered if he’d been taking care of himself properly.

“Do you need anything?” His voice was raspy, quiet. You looked at him, brown eyes met yours. Your heart clenched. Here he was, mentally exhausted, and the first thing he said to you wasn’t a hello, but rather, asking quietly if you needed anything.

“Can I come inside?” You asked sheepishly, and he blinked for a second, before nodding, opening the door more for you to pass. “Go ahead.”

You stepped past him, into the hallway of his small apartment. The smell of incense invaded your nose, and you frowned. He closed the door, and crossed his arms. “What’s going on, Y/N?”

“Are you okay? You looked so tired today, you look tired now.”

“I’m fine—"

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

You refused to let him keep it all to himself. “Sehun…”

He leaned against the wall, head bowed, and you mirrored his stance, standing against the wall as well, but you didn’t look away. “Y/N, I can’t deal with that right now. People need me.”

“Sehun, you can’t force yourself like this, you’ve told me that yourself—"

“I have to make this work. I can’t fail like last time, not if DC is what we think it is.”

You sighed, taking a step forward, resting a hand on his arm. He glanced at it briefly, then raised his head to look at you. You said nothing, but guided him to sit down on the couch, and you sat next to him.

“Sehun,” You said, voice quiet, “DC is nothing but puppets right now pretending they’re actually doing anything. We have our puppets, the sect have theirs. You can’t be sure that a place like that is what determines whether we’re doomed or not. You said it yourself, there are so many possibilities that DC isn’t the place we’re thinking about.”

He took a few deep breaths, nodding to your words before rubbing his eyes with his thumb and index finger. He looked strained, and you moved to sit closer to him.

“Everything is so fucked up,” Sehun whispered, and you nodded in agreement. “I feel like everything is out of control. Like I can’t do anything about it. Meanwhile, Sehün—"

“Sehün has people who think he’s a god obeying his every whim, just like the rest of those—those idiots.“ Your voice was quiet, but firm, refusing to allow him to compare himself to his brother, "The only reason they look so polished and seem to have everything under control is they only leave the Sanctuary when they absolutely need to, to save face. They feel like they’re above everyone else.”

You took Sehun’s hand, carefully removing his worn, black glove before cradling it in your smaller hand, as if it were incredibly fragile. His eyes met yours, and you gave him a sad smile.

“The Brotherhood, on the other hand… You only use that title for formality’s sake. Yes, you’re all the leaders, but you see yourselves as equal to the rest of us. All of you are out there with us, on the front lines. You’re tired because you give everything you have to serve this cause, my love. You feel that everything is out of control because… well, it is. Lady Fate is a tricky one, we all know that. But you feel it even more because you’re dealing with it head on, not from some sparkly throne on a golden pedestal.”

Sehun’s eyes glittered with several emotions you couldn’t pinpoint, but you could see fondness in them. He leaned forward, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. “Starshine,” He mumbled into your hair, before resting his chin on the crown of your head, “Where would I be without you.”

You hummed, before allowing your eyes to flutter shut, and the two of you sat in silence for what seemed like hours. You reflected back to when you and Sehun both realized your feelings for one another, after a devastating battle in Salt Lake City where Sehun had given his brother the now infamous scar running down the left side of his face, some six years ago. He’d come so close to dying that day, and you’d realized just how important he was to you.

You’d been joined by the hip since you were children, and when the revelation came that he and Sehün were the brothers of liberality and greed respectively, you didn’t hesitate in taking his side, vowing to follow him until the bitter end.

It all made sense to you when you came to Sehun’s sickbed, seeing him resting and bloodied, that you’d actually been in love with the boy for a long time, perhaps ever since you’d first met him. You wouldn’t ever be able to live without him, and apparently, he felt the same way.

In this moral crisis, you were his anchor, his tether to the corporeal plane when his world was on an ethereal one.

Upon all the doubts that everyone had, as to whether the Fated Fourteen were truly gods or if they were simply men with delusions of grandeur chosen by Lady Fate for her cruel entertainment, he felt that you were what reminded him that he was human, that past gods were never truly capable of love or real emotion.

To be capable of loving you was a humbling experience, one that he treasured dearly, especially in moments like this.

“Do you remember what we did the last time you felt like you had no control?” Your voice was a whisper, full of promise and anticipation, as the hand that wasn’t holding his own came to ghost over his thigh. Sehun’s breath hitched, recalling the experience. Roughness against soft, supple skin, restraint and control, you giving yourself entirely to him before he gave himself entirely to you.

“What exactly are you proposing?” He murmured, and you exhaled as one would when they found something amusing, the ghost of a laugh. “You know what I’m proposing, Sehun. Don’t act as if I haven’t seen you teaching Chanyeol to tie his knots when he’s getting ready to go out on a field mission.”

His hand tugged yours towards him, and you moved as he sat back, resting his back against the couch as he helped you straddle his waist. You faced him, realizing with a giggle that he’d turned slightly pink at your accusation.

“Do me a favor,” He said, and you nodded, letting your free hand rest on his shoulder. “Never talk about Chanyeol when you’re trying to get me into bed again. You are the sexiest thing I’ve ever laid my eyes on… Chanyeol, however, is the most unsexy person I’ve ever had the pleasure of knowing.”

Your head tipped back with laughter, and he joined in with you. Your heart, upon hearing this, skipped a beat. You had a hard time recalling when the last he’d laughed was. “I think Sasha would disagree.”

“Yeah, but Sasha isn’t here now, is she? It’s just you and me.” He leaned forward, trapping your waist with his hands and letting his face come close to yours. You watched his eyes flutter down to watch your lips, inches away from yours. You gulped when his lips parted, his tongue peeking out to lick the pink skin.

“So you want me to tie you up. Take control.”

Your hands wrapped around his neck, and you smiled. “Only if you want to tie me up. I want you to have at least one thing you feel you can control.”

Sehun licked his lips again, sighing in amusement as he considered the idea. “Y’know, a few weeks ago, some of the field officers came in with a bunch of fabric they managed to smuggle out of LA…” His tone was quiet, and his hands began trailing downwards, pulling you against him, voice filling you with anticipation. Comfortable fabric was so difficult to come by these days, given that the Sect had taken what were once lavish city districts.

You gasped slightly when your core came into contact with his lap, feeling he was already starting to get hard, and felt your face heat up.

“I might’ve bought a silk tie or two off of ‘em,” He told you, eyes burning holes into your skin, “Wanted to see what my starshine would look like in pink.”

Your felt your hands tighten of their own volition against the fabric of his black t-shirt, your mind conjuring the mental image. “Fuck, Sehun. W-where’s the jute?”

He flashed a lopsided grin, and you felt the need to smack the smug look off of his face. How he could go from being so serious to this, was beyond you. You personally didn’t believe that The Brotherhood and The Lords of the Sect were gods, but Sehun’s duality, in situations like this, seemed to be supernatural at times, if you dared say so yourself.

He pressed his lips to yours briefly, before lightly nudging you to get off of his lap. “I’ll go get it, baby. Give me a second.”

He stood, catching his breath briefly, before walking down the hall, towards his closet. The hallway was slightly darker, and you stood, striding over to him as he pulled out the rope. He turned to face you, and he quickly cornered you against the wall.

“Shirt off. Bra, too.”

You grinned. “What are you gonna do this time?”

You could vaguely make out his features, but you knew his face was probably twisted up in smug satisfaction. Regardless, you obeyed silently, your chest rising and falling quickly with anticipation.

“Chest harness, for now,” He quipped, “Is that okay?”

You nodded, not breaking eye contact with him as you undressed yourself. You wanted him to realize that you weren’t backing down.

He seemed to read you perfectly, nodding in response to your answer as he watched you pull off the dark fabric, before reaching behind you to unclasp your bra. Even in the dim light of the corridor, you could see how his eyebrows raised and the way his lips parted slightly, lazy gaze falling down to your breasts. You knew what he was gawking at.

The studs embedded in your nipples were a dark stainless steel, glittering, alluring. You’d gotten them on a whim at nineteen from some clandestine tattoo artist on the way back from a field operation. He’d always had a bit of a fascination with them, the way they seemed to twinkle at him underneath the light.

"You gonna stare at me all night or will I have to tie myself up?”

Your playful jab snapped him out of his reverie, and he straightened his posture a few seconds later. “Go stand in front of the bed.” His voice was soft, but still commanding.

You stalked into the dark bedroom, standing in front of where you made the bed out to be. He followed you, before standing behind you. “Are you going to tie my hands up, too?"

"Not yet, starshine,” He declared quietly, into your left ear. You could tell he was untangling the jute, and you pursed your lips in anticipation. “You want to know what I’m about to do to you?”

“You know I do,” You whispered, a confession just for him, before lifting your arms and your hair for him to work.

“Too bad,” He sighed, ”Because I’m not telling you.”

You huffed, but didnt protest.

His arms began to wrap the rope below your ribcage, tightening the jute to the point where you could feel it digging into your skin, but enough to complicate your breathing. Taut, but not torturous. You closed your eyes, sighing quietly as he looped the jute higher up this time, just between your breasts and your collarbones, wrapping back to where he began, in the middle of your back.

The sensation of the rough fibers against your skin was by no means comfortable. It was scratchy and some stray fibers tickled at your chest. But its presence against your skin, the implications of its position and what was to come, was most definitely comforting. Intimacy with Sehun now was rare, you rarely even slept next to each other. But you knew that it wasn’t because of a strain in your relationship.

Sehun had always needed peace of mind and silence when it came to auguries and prophecy readings. Now, with the war coming so close to what seemed to be the end, he needed it more than ever, and the moments you shared with him came to a pause. You didn’t complain—the cause came before your emotions, now and always. But inside you were crying out for him; in concern, in longing, in yearning.

So maybe that’s why when he paused his ministrations and chuckled, tracing a finger down his spine, you whimpered quietly, thighs rubbing together in anticipation. “You have goosebumps,” He said, lips brushing against the shell of your ear.

“It’s been a while,” You answered, and he hummed in response, pressing a soft kiss to your nape. You sighed at the sensation.

“Drop your arms, and turn around to look at me,” Sehun whispered a few seconds later, and with some help from him to maneuver through the rope he was still trying to tie around you, you were able to complete his request.

“You’re so fucking gorgeous.” His voice was throaty, eyes scanning your body as you did the same, eyes landing on the growing bulge in his pants.

“Sehun, please just hurry.”

He shook his head, crooked smile still gracing his face. His hands worked quickly, looping the jute underneath the lowest rope, between your breasts.

“It’s not too tight, is it?” He asked, and you shook your head.

“It’s fine. Not too tight, not too loose.”

He nodded, eyebrows furrowing in concentration. “Okay. Let me know if it becomes too much at any point.”

“I know, Hun.”

Sehun’s dark eyes lifted their gaze from where his hands were working to meet your own, not saying anything. By now, the smile had faded, replaced by a stern look of concentration.

Be still, my heart, you thought, he is so beautiful.

“What?” You whispered, and he blinked.

His response was soft, gentle. “I would fucking die for you.”

You felt your face grow warm, and you lowered your gaze. “Sehun,” You murmured, “I—”

“Sh, sh,” He answered, continuing to tie the rope, “Listen to me, starshine. You’re it for me. There’s never been anyone else. A-and if anything happens, Lady Fate forbid it… There’ll never be anyone else.”

He finished his words as he tied off the final knot, and silently, you stood there, eyes shut as you pressed your forehead to his. For how long, you weren’t sure. Seconds, minutes, eons… Maybe no time had passed at all. You didn’t really care. Moments like these were never long enough, they always ended too soon. Sehun was your elixir of life, your lifeline, and in these moments, you felt immortal, invincible, powerful.

To be able to bring such a man like him to his knees, to be so ready to put himself on the line for you; you were sure it would be your ruin.

You surged forward, wrapping your arms around Sehun’s neck, and he caught you as you pressed your lips to his in a blazing kiss. His arms wrapped around your waist, pulling you impossibly closer. You whined into the kiss, the dark cotton of his t-shirt pressing against your sensitive nipples and their piercings.

“Sehun,” You moaned into the kiss, reaching down to tug at the hem of his shirt. “N-not fair, take it off.”

He hummed, pulling away to comply with your protests, revealing toned skin and the broad shoulders you so adored.

“Is it fair now?” He asked, grabbing your upper arms to pull you closer and press kisses to your collarbones and along your sternum. “I should tie your hands now, maybe then you’ll learn you’re not allowed to touch without my permission.”

“Shut up,” You said, ignoring his declaration as he pushed you onto the bed. You peered up at his broad form, towering over you in the darkness, almost trembling in anticipation, waiting for him to put his hands on you, to make a move.

A few moments later, he finally did, reaching down to pull your pants off, as well as your underwear. He pressed soft kisses to your stomach as he did. When both garments were finally tossed aside, he lifted himself up onto the bed, lips trailing up across your skin. His eyes met yours as he gazed up at you, through you, before pressing his lips to one of your breasts, your sensitive nipples hardening at the contact of his warm mouth against the cool steel embedded in it.

Your head tipped back, eyes fluttering shut, unable to keep eye contact with your lover. One of your hands came up to comb through his dark hair, whimpering as he alternated between your nipples.

“Sehun, mmph, baby…” You murmured, coming back to look at him when he let go and came back to kiss at your jawline.

“Up, starshine,” He ordered, leaving no room for protest, arms wrapping around your waist and hauling you up to sit on his lap. As you squirmed to get comfortable in his grip, one of his hands reached for his nightstand’s drawer, and he pulled out two pastel pink silk ties. Your heart leaped towards your throat in excitement when you registered what these were, hips subconsciously searching for friction against his.

“Sit still,” He huffed as he closed the drawer, before straightening his posture, dwarfing you even sitting beneath you.

Wordlessly, he brought the tie up to your eyes, covering them before tying it at the back of your head with one tie, quickly doing the same to your hands with the other, tying them tightly in front of you.

“Fuck, you’re so pretty,” He mumbled, hands raking from your hair to down your back.

His hands came to grasp at your thighs, propping them so they rested only atop one of his. You felt your core clench at what he was alluding to, inhaling sharply.

“Move your hips, baby,” He said, and you couldn’t bring it in you to deny him.

Another thing you couldn’t do was speak, you found, as you prayed you could maintain your balance and began to slowly rock your hips against the rough fabric of his dark pants and his toned thigh, your bare pussy rubbing listlessly against the coarse fabric. You didn’t mind however, perfectly content to let him speak, murmuring strange hybrids of dirty and sweet things in your ear.

The hot pleasure between your legs seemed to double at the restriction in your ribs and not being able to see or anticipate where his hands or mouth were. You buried your head into the crook of Sehun’s neck, peppering wet, opened kisses against his collarbones, your nails digging into your palms with a vengeance in hopes of anchoring yourself to something.

The movements of your hips soon became capricious, rhythmless, your whimpers becoming louder and louder as he switched between flexing his thigh and bouncing it like a restless child. In the darkness of the silk tie, you could feel the callousness of his fingertips as they dug into your hips, a guided meditation through your pleasure.

The room reeked of incense and sex, you realized as you attempted to delay your slowly building release by focusing on different things. Smells, sounds, and finally, Sehun.

This was the Sehun you loved most, the one you cherished most in your heart. The Sehun that was so willing to give, give, and give, but not to the point of recklessness, unlike the Sehun you had seen so often lately in the war room. This Sehun was yours, and yours only. And if the growing wet spot against his rough pants was any indication, then your body loved this Sehun as well.

“S-Sehun.”

“Hmm?”

“P-please let me touch you.”

“Alright, since you asked so nicely.”

You clumsily began to search for his hard bulge, and he grabbed your tied hands and guided them to something hard and hot. You jumped slightly in surprise, not realizing he had taken himself out of his pants while you were humping away at his thigh like a bitch in heat.

He laughed at your squirming, and you slowed the rhythm of your hips in annoyance, but not completely—your hips had stopped folding to you, subconsciously rutting, twitching gently against the rough, now ruined fabric, perpetually searching for release.

“S-shut up,” You panted, and he laughed again, pressing another kiss to your jawline.

“You shut up. I still have to make you come.”

His hands resumed their leisurely movement on your hips, your focus snapping back to the impending edge, thoughts blurring into incoherency as the pleasure against your core. Mindlessly, you let go of Sehun’s member to bring your hands up to your mouth, attempting to spit crudely in order to improvise lube.

Instead, your heart jumped into your throat in arousal when Sehun grabbed your free hand and did the same, keening at his actions, eyebrows furrowing. And, despite feeling a slight annoyance at the chafing of your thighs, a feral instinct took over, and your hips sped up against his thighs.

“You look perfect like this,” He told you, guiding your hand back to where he needed you most, and you began to pump him slowly. His hands moved to wrap around your waist, large hands splaying possessively across your back.

“Gods, I wish you could see how lovely you look, starshine,” He mumbled, seemingly in a daze, “All mine.”

You nodded. “Y-yours, Hunnie. Only yours.”

He pressed a kiss to your collarbone, his breath picking up as your hands did the same, pace speeding up. He groaned against your skin as you pressed your thumb into the slit of his cock. Your movements were harsh, jerking against him as you felt yourself losing yourself in his touch.

“S-Sehun, I’m gonna…”

“I’ve got you,” He whispered, his voice your only anchor, “Let go, Y/N, it’s okay.”

Finally, finally, you crested, head tipping back, mouth falling open in a silent scream, body stiffening in his arms as you were possessed by pleasure. In the dark, colors danced around you, sounds could be touched, Sehun’s hands on your body tasted exquisite.

You didn’t even realize that your display had tipped Sehun over the edge, spilling himself onto your hands while he gripped your shoulders like his life depended on it.

When you came down from your orgasm, your chest heaving, you reached up to pull the blindfold off of your face, struggling slightly as you were still restrained by the silk tie. You blinked a few times, eyes adjusting to the light of Sehun’s room, and found that he had fallen back onto the bed in the height of his orgasm.

His eyes had fluttered closed, panting furiously. He seemed loose, almost boneless, and you stifled a laugh at how much more relaxed he seemed now.

“I take it you had fun?” You asked, poking his stomach teasingly. After a moment of silence, of what you assumed to be Sehun trying to catch his breath, you furrowed your eyebrows.

“Hunnie, come on, get up. Can you untie me, please, baby?”

No response. If anything, Sehun’s pants seemed to be getting even heavier.

“Sehun?”

His eyes fluttered open, and your blood ran cold.

His eyes had rolled up into his head, mouth opening and closing as if he were trying to say something but he’d lost his voice. Around you, the temperature seemed to drop.Out of nowhere, the scent of incense returned, stronger than ever, and beneath you, Sehun tensed, muscles contracting as he began to seize.

You froze, momentarily unsure of what was happening. Here lay your lover, convulsing under you, and you were restrained to a point where it would be difficult to help him. Panic creeped into your stomach, eyes searching for something, anything, that would get you out of the grasp of the silk tie. You brought your wrists up to your teeth, frantically hoping to loosen the knot. Sehun was still convulsing. Your eyes drifted around the room, glancing at his stiff hands, gnarled into unrecognizable gestures. Your clothes were on the floor, but you had left your knife in your room.

Knife. Sehun’s knife.

You lunged for the nightstand, knowing that was where he kept his switchblade in case of an emergency, tumbling to the floor as your legs gave out, still wobbly from both panic and your previous orgasm. You managed to open the drawer, clumsily fumbling for the blade, before pulling it out, holding it between your teeth and bringing your wrists up to your mouth, beginning to saw away at the lovely, pale fabric, suddenly not caring about its softness or its illusion of luxury.

All you needed was to know that Sehun was okay.

Your eyes squeezed shut at the thought that he might be dying, and when the final strands of silk finally gave way, you practically spat out the knife, grabbing onto the nightstand for balance, turning to look at Sehun on your weak legs.

He wasn’t on the bed anymore. Your eyebrows furrowed, head spinning as you tried to figure out what was going on.

“Beware the master of tongues.”

You shrieked, eyes snapping up from where the deep, almost demonic voice had come from, and almost fainted then and there.

Because somehow, Sehun was floating above you, suspended in midair, eyes open wide but not a sliver of brown could be seen. In its place shone a bright silver, the holiest of metals for the unholiest sight.

“Beware the master of tongues,” The voice spoke again, speaking through Sehun, who was stiff as a board, face contorted into a sneer, and you realized with a chill that this wasn’t Sehun, but rather the Oracle.

“Beware the master of tongues,” He said once more, as his sneer morphed into a cruel grin, “But beware more the wrath of the faceless one.”

#kpop scenarios #kpop smut #kpop imagines #kpop x reader #kpop au #exo x reader #exo scenarios #exo smut #exo imagines #sehun x reader #sehun smut #sehun scenarios #my writing #fic: aygaf

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abiik · 4 years

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@vhsgf replied to your post “this song made me realize i've never written about jason missing zoe”

heather this might be too forward and angsty of me to say (pls lmk if is) but now i am curious about zoe reacting to jason's death and then mirroring w jason coming back from the dead and then finding out his best friend is dead. like it sounds so PAINFUL but like. also i wanna know about it. heather what have you done i-

i had to put my hair up for this. im literally so emotional about this rn,,,like when am i not but STILL OKAY IT MAKES ME VERY [SCREECHES] (also a read more because this is fucking long im so sorry)

okay let’s start with zoe because jason’s death is a traumatic thing for her on like multiple points all relating back to when she was like elementary school aged (im pretty sure i have it where she’s like 8 ish when this happens). before jason and before going into the whole vigilante business – no matter what version of zoe you prefer – she loses her two younger brothers in a joker related accident. he kills them. and zoe… zoe is so,,, well she’s angry. because no one does anything. no one. not that fabled batman, not the police, not the fucking government – NOBODY. and she’s just supposed to keep living her life like everything is fucking fine because oh that’s just the way gotham is. and like why the fuck would she just keep living her life when her barely out of toddler aged little brothers are now dead?? why wouldn’t she want to do something about that?? why the fuck should she just let it roll off her back like no biggie?? (of course, this is a catalyst for her mother’s downward spiral and eventual disappearance, and then keme’s).

then of course, there’s zoe’s powers. at that age she didn’t really understand the extent of them, what she could do with them and all that, but as they develop and her own awareness of them develop, she is faced by like intense guilt and remorse. if only she’d been able to do something. if only she’d been there. if only she could’ve stopped the joker. if only, if only, if only. and like, realistically, there wasn’t much she could do. it wasn’t like she knew fully how strong she was; she’d barely gotten flying down at that point, but then she’s growing up and she realizes she never really had a limit. and she kind of has this complex, i’ve said it before but she really does try to bear the weight of the world on her shoulders, so everything that has happened to her up until this point after the twins die, it’s partly her fault; if only she could have been better, she could have saved them, she could have her mom, she could have keme – she could have her family back.

then, of course, there is in all of this her intense hatred of the joker. and by correlation to the whole fucking issue, gotham city and batman. (ive said that they kind of grow to like each other more, but when z and jay become friends and through their teen years until his death, it’s kind of like whenever youre gay and your bff is gay and you both kind of hate the other’s really fucked up parent who’s okay sometimes but isn’t all the time and you would totally like throw down with them if only there weren’t like,,,repercussions)

anyway, so when jason dies, it’s a big fucking deal. like he’d already been acting weird, bruce was worried about him, z was worried about him, and then he dies okay. and zoe… bruce doesn’t tell zoe right away. he doesn’t tell her and when zoe does find out, she. is. pissed. all of the shit with her baby brothers comes back. she wasn’t there. she wasn’t able to save him – because she sure as hell KNOWS that she could have at this point. and now he’s GONE. AND THIS ENTIRE TIME, SHE HAD NO FUCKING CLUE BECAUSE BRUCE DIDN’T TELL HER!!! she couldn’t even go to his funeral!!! and then, AND THEN, on fucking top of that – it was the joker who killed him. so jason’s death was like a fucking quadruple blow to her.

after finding out the details, zoe goes binary for the first time. and it’s… well it’s scary. it takes a whole lot of coaxing from old teammates and being physically restrained by diana (who lowkey is kinda like why?? are?? we?? stopping?? her?? from?? killing?? the?? joker??) and clark and donna, and they can’t even really knock her out because when she’s binary, there’s only really waiting out the duration of the high until she passes tf out from using too much energy. which she DOES and then after a good long talk with gran-gran, zoe’s going on a much needed retreat with diana to themyscira.

during that time, zoe’s super depressed. like reasonably, so. she’s so exhausted and she’s still angry but she’s also just like,,, so tired. she lost her best friend dude. like she loves jason so much, she loves him so much, and then he was just gone. poof! and at least, at least with atsa and ahiga, she got to like, be there for their send off. jason ends up being another hole in her life, like her dad and her mom and keme. he’s added to this list of people who all were just…g o n e. she didn’t get to mourn them. like obviously, she can, but every time she thinks about jason, she begins to spiral. (this is kind of when she starts drinking,,,, human alcohol can’t really touch her but she does therapeutically – which is!! not good!!) she also begins to distance herself – from jason’s titans (connor holds on with an iron grip and eddie still checks up on her, but rose was just as distraught and kyle is still kind of numb), from the original titans, from bruce and alfred, from diana, even from gran-gran and uncle bell. she fills the void with work as well as the alcohol that doesn’t really do anything to her except make her mouth taste gross and weird and she hates it but it’s become a habit. if she isn’t out doing some reckless thing while saving the world, then she’s at a bar or just sitting by the ocean.

she has bad dreams too, like horrible dreams. and like,,, they’re not necessarily horrific or anything,, she usually dreams about good times, memories with jason or with atsa and ahiga, sometimes some weird mixture of all three of them hanging out together and it’s the worst fucking thing because she wakes up and she wishes she was there too, that she could stay with them, because she misses them so much. she just wants her family back, she wants the family she had before jason and dick and alfred and the titans, but she also wants them too – she wants all of it.

and then it all comes to head with her dad’s sudden involvement with earth and shit. zoe sacrifices herself not only because she carries the fucking world on her shoulders and has a stupid martyr complex, but also because she thinks she’d be okay dying like this. she doesn’t. die that is. she doesn’t die but she also doesn’t come back.

jason’s revival story arc thing is all a bit murky for me bc I kind of like mix the whole waking up and clawing himself from his grave and also the under the red hood storyline (and like correct me if there is a version like that bc like,,, idk I can’t remember). anyway, so jason comes back, and like it’s kind of messy bc of timeline shit but he doesn’t really come back, come back, until z’s gone. like gone gone. like they held a funeral and everything for her. jason didn’t get to go and THAT is SHIT. like yeah, he wasn’t fucking alive, nobody fucking knows he’s alive anyway, but it still hurts.

and like,,, you know what else kind of hurts, is like he kind of thought that after he came back, if no one was on his side – if for some reason literally everyone was against him – he’d still have zoe. that’s the worst fucking part. he hears about what happened. he hears that she literally went ballistic. and like,, jason KNOWS that zoe would have his side, that zoe would be there for him, that even if she might not have agreed with some of the things he’s done, that she’d be right by his side, showing she cares. because like. like I know bruce is kind of stunted with emotional expression, but it’s really hard to feel like you’re appreciated when someone else’s love language is so fucking hard to translate, when you need constant validation, to be told you matter to be shown you matter to them and they can’t accommodate even a little bit, because of their pride or because they have to deem that you deserve it all of a sudden. and like I love bruce, but they way he treats his kids is shit. so yeah. jason feels hella alone when he comes back and his best friend, his rock, his ride or die (literally wfkejvnk) is fucking gone.

jason definitely has nightmares too. he doesn’t know how zoe died, like really know – no one does, because there hadn’t been a body. and jason’s mind can be a pretty dark place already, add on top of that the nightmares about his best friend dying the same way he did, or being like dick, who actually witnessed the explosion that ‘killed’ zoe. he can’t even fathom what zoe went through with his death, but eventually, as jason kind of comes back into the batfam and shit, he also kind of gets to be with the last of zoe’s family. gran-gran and uncle bell are much warmer than bruce wayne and that too big mansion and that cold fucking cave. jason goes to the ranch a lot, or finds himself at uncle bell’s antique shop whenever he needs a breather, to just be alone with something that close to zoe.

they literally both go through that period where they’re extremely reckless with mourning and regrets and fuck i never got to say this and fuck what could I have done differently, what could I have changed if I’d been there? but where jason is able to recover more effectively, zoe doesn’t do so well in space.

really, that song had triggered thoughts about jason going through her things, the things she left in his bedroom – that bruce refused to touch or move or anything – and just thinking back on their life together. it was definitely shorter than they expected and when jason thinks about it, it’s a whole bunch of salty anger and throat swelling sadness that has him kind of crippled. because like,,, he also knows how the twins died, he knows how it happened, not only did he have the firsthand accounts from those most effected, but also like, he read the reports. he KNOWS, and he feels kind of guilty, just a little bit, that what he did put her through a similar version to losing her baby brothers.

NREJKVNERLFEWLFJNEKR FUCK OKAY I THINK I NEED TO STOP LIKE THIS IS OBVIOUSLY JUST A BIG DUMB BUT BFJKERNFKJEN F U C K OKAY

#vhsgf #h replies.#look they make me fucking cry #their relationship hurts me so bad #and fuck whenever they MEET AGAIN!!!#LITERALLY SO FUCKING RECKLESS TTRYING TO KEEP THE OTHER FROM EVER LEAVING THEM AGAIN LIKE HAHA SIKE BITCH #I DIDN'T COME BACK FROM THE DEAD ONLY FOR NOTHIN #YOU'RE NEVER GETTIGN RID OF ME AND IM NEVER GETTING RID OF YOU #oc: zoe huang #this is also so fucking rambly i apologizeee #suicide /#depression /#death /#alcohol /#ask to tag

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jiminsfault · 4 years

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50 questions tag

I got tagged by @yoongs-jeontae ! Thank you💖

What colors is your hairbrush? It’s like a brown-ish shimmery color? Idk o.o

What food would you never eat? I probably would never be able to eat the meat of rabbits or deers, sheep and that kind of stuff

Are you usually hot or cold? I’m always a cozy crispy amount of warmth under my blanket. But when I’m outside I go from both extremes because I’m super sensitive so, spring/summer: always hot, autumn/winter: always cold. There is no inbetween

What did you do 45 minutes ago? I was in an online class and got math tutoring🤠 it was horrible thanks for asking my brain is fried

Favorite chocolate? The really dark kind. It’s the only chocolate I’ll ever really crave. I can bear milk chocolate if I have to

Have you ever been to a professional sports event? I hAve actually omg! It was a handball game and super boring, I didn’t know whats going on ever and only clapped when everyone else did🤡 (I was forced by my ex to tag along I absolutely hate sports)

What was the last thing you said out loud? “Oh my god, that was horrible” right after I ended the call with my teacher skckjs

Favorite ice cream flavor? Brownie fudge? Is that what it’s called? The chocolate ice cream with brownie pieces in it, it’s so fUcking gOOD sorry for cursing it’s necessary

What was the last thing you drank? Some nice crispy wAter

What kind of wallet do you have? A small black one because I didn’t think about practicality when buying it. Currently looking for a bigger one.

What was the last thing you ate? I actually have no clue if that’s the english word for it but kebab? IT’S DÖNER IN GERMAN

Did you buy clothes last weekend? I haven’t bought clothes in months actually omg

What was the last sports event you saw? I watched the soccer game that’s like a really big thing back in 2018 🤠🤠

Who was the last person you texted? My mom cus she’s out buying groceries and asked me what kind of ice cream I want kekdjejd

Do you like camping? I despise camping with my entire being. When I was little my mom always forced me to go on 500 camping trips a year and I feel the biggest rage in me when I think about all the bugs and uncomfortable nights I- will not continue talking about this now.

Do you eat vitamins? No, like not at all. Not one vitamin has entered my body in a few weeks. I used to have these tablets that disappear in water but I stopped drinking that because I only take them bc of my muscles and currently I’m not leaving the house so,,, don’t need them >:)

When was the last time you traveled? The last time I full on traveled like outside of the country was in 2018 when my class went to italy because of our graduation 🤠 trauma

Do you like sunbathing? I can’t really answer that because if I sunbathe I will burn. Like literally I’m getting a sunburn just from walking to the train on a sunny day if I don’t have the strongest suncream on??? My skin is very🤡 so yeah idk if I like it? Never tried

Asian or Italian food? Asian food absolutely. I’m not sure about italian food because I just don’t know anything about italian kitchen but I dO knOw that theres so much variety with asian food? And so far I’ve loved every asian dish I’ve tried so,,

Do you drink soda? Nope. I stopped drinking soda four years ago I think because my skin was sO bad and I gained weight so quickly without eating a lot so I stopped drinking soda and tada! Barely getting pimples now😎 also it’s just tastier like my mouth doesn’t stick anymore and I don’t literally feel the sugar on my teeth?? (Although I do sometimes sip on a bit of coke but only on special occasions)

What color socks are you wearing now? White with a very,, aqua? blue stripe? And the name of the brand in the same color🤠 fashion

When was the last time you were speeding? I don’t drive🤡😔

What are you afraid of? Everything pretty much. Commitment, people leaving me, talking to people, failing, succeeding, should I continue?

What can you see if you turn left? A lot? It’s inside my room (my bed is in the right corner) but first thing would be my switch cus she laying next to me

What kind of housework you like the least? I actually love housework? At least the things that I do. Like I never mow the lawn because that’s not my job yknow? But I like emptying and filling the dish washer, cleaning pans in the sink, doing the laundry, wiping the floor. Maybe I should become a maid?

What is the first thing you think of when you hear someone talking in a language you don’t know? I try to hear what language it is, like I try guessing at least. Of course I don’t know what every language sounds like but it’s a fun little game I have for myself when I’m bored in public transpo

Do you sleep on your back or side? On my right side towards the wall. At least at night, when I take a nap I sleep on my left side towards the room. Idk why pls don’t ask me, I can’t fall asleep otherwise.

You crave fast food, where do you go? So around where I live there aren’t a lot of options? Also in germany in general we don’t have the fast food fest that america has, so I always go for either Mcdonald’s or Subway.

What is your lucky number? 5. I don’t know when it became my favorite/lucky number but somehow at some point in time it’s become the number I always use when someone wants me to guess or answer a question, I use it for picking things and all that🤡🤠 maybe it’s because it sounds rly funny in german

Who was the last person you talked to? In person my mom cus she’s the only one I see nowadays. On the phone would be two of my friends and I also talked to my tutoring teacher through discord so? Pick👁👁

Do you eat meat? I would say no if I wouldn’t sometimes do slip some meat in. It’s very rare and a small amount when I do. Idk how this developed because I used to eat meat multiple times a week but at some point I started only eating chicken and only in smaller amounts and sometimes not even once in two weeks. I eat fish tho? Does that count?

What was the last song you listened to? “Love without tragedy/mother mary” by rihanna because I was feeling the 10’s last night at 5am🤠

Last book? I actually just tried to find the english title of it but I can’t find any sign of it being translated so,, “der Totenzeichner” by Veit Etzold. I read this book twice, once in 9th grade and once just recently and I will not get enough of it. Another one of his books “Final cut” is laying on my bedside table waiting for me to start it. He’s an iconic author.

What is your favourite day of the week? If we were speaking from when it’s a regular routine and I would go to uni, I’d say Monday. I know I sound like a psycho but saying friday or saturday is my favorite day is basic because obviously everyone loves the weekend. Monday is a great day usually because my day starts in third period and does still go 6 classes like regular days but it feels nice to go into uni later in the day so I always appreciate it. (Tho saturday do be hitting different)

Do you know the alphabet song backwards? I don’t even know it forwards 🤡😔

Favorite coffee/tea? I don’t drink coffee but my favorite tea is probably fennel tea, everyone I know hates it, especially without sugar but I love it :(

Favourite shoes? From the ones I personally own I’d say my nike zoom 2ks because they look good and are super comfortable. Shoes that I wish I would have would be Dr. Martens but I’m pOor🤡 I am absolutely a whore for sneakers so I won’t even start listing all the sneakers I love

When do you usually go to sleep? If I’m on schedule around 11-12pm of actually going into the bed physically and falling asleep 30/40 minutes later. While I’m now constantly at home I do still physically get into bed at the same time but I stay up from 2-7am depending on how fun people are, if I play a game, if I read/draw, have a series or movie to watch. I’m insane I am aware🤡

When do you usually wake up? Again, when I’m on schEdule I wake up mondays and tuesdays at 6.30am, from wednesday to friday at 6.10am, on the weekend around 10am. Right now? It’s a surprise everyday. Sometimes I’m up at 4pm, sometimes I’m up at 10am, today I was actually super early with 9.30 so😎

Sunrise or sunset? That’s actually so hard because I do see the sunset a lot more than rise since I have my rOllÄdEn down so I don’t actually remember what a sunrise looks like. Because I have no other choice I say sunset. With doubt.

Do you like your bed soft or hard? I thINK my bed is hard? I once laid on a friend’s bed that was super soft and I’m pretty sure I didn’t like it

Describe the plate you are eating from? They’re from ikea. They’re white with like blue swirls idk my mom bought them I didn’t make the decisions

Your favorite type of alcohol? Currently I don’t really drink alcohol (mainly because of the lack of opportunities) bUt when I do drink I really like sweet sparkling wine (I googled this I’m not sure if that’s the right word idkd)

Do you like board games? Depending on which people I play with. If a person is getting angry that they’re losing it makes the game absolutely suck and since I’m surrounded by those people I haven’t made good memories with board games kcjdjs,,, if the company is fun I like the games too tho

If you had a car, what kind would it be? Unrealisticly I’d love to own a Lamborghini Aventador or Urus because those cars are just mouth-watering to me. Since I most likely won’t ever be able to afford either of those, I’d love to have a Fiat 500. I fell in love with this car like,,, it’s so cute and the inside is pretty too so everything fits for me the way I want it to. I’ll have to settle for a way less nice car tho once I get a license, at least for a while🤡

Do you know how to change car tires? In theory yes

Dream country? Like to live in? Damn idk. I’d love to live in a country with like,, cULTURE you know? Something exciting and cool to look at, less stuck up people almans be really boring 🤡 so maybe something like spain or italy, maybe america if yall vote for a different president. Japan or Korea would be super cool too I- the whole world ma’am? I couldn’t live in countries like idk hawaii or sumn because of the heat so I’ll just mfing stay in germany😔😔

If you could choose from any jobs in the world, what would you like to do? If I would have the chance I’d love to become an actor because that just seems super cool. But like I’m not nearly attractive enough for people to want to look at me on a scEen so nO

What would you like to try to do? I’m pretty set on trying to learn how to dance like that’s probably not as exciting as other things I could do but :/ yeh idk

And what is stopping you? Literally just me being lazy and talking myself into believing I won’t be good without even trying nsncjsks (also yes I seperated these questions because otherwise it wouldn’t be 50)

thIs was sO mUch omg sjjcjs I’m literally exhausted from all these questions😩😩

I’m tagginggg @gallhali @shadowsremedy if u wanna!

#tagged #fairyfriends #yoongs-jeontae

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livvywrites · 5 years

Note

“Go and die for all I care!” - tali & nora somehow pls

okay so i’m combining this with the other prompt you sent, 14 from this list. for extra angst purposes!

prompt source!

so this one is... set in the canon universe, but isn’t exactly canon??? a similar situation to this is planned, but it’s. very different. (very, very different lmao). BUT i adapted it to fit the prompt. because otherwise it wouldn’t have made as much sense.

CW: some discussion & references to suicide. under a cut bc it got long!!

"Fine," Talithasnapped, "just go and die for all I care!"

"Maybe I fucking will,"Alinora snapped back. "Beats hanging around in this lousy fuckinglife." Alinora slammed the door shut behind her and stomped down the hall.Tears burned at her eyes but she ignored them. That woman was so... she wasso...

She was so irritating!

Alinora wasn't exactly happy aboutthis either, thank you very much, but it was the only way. Nomagical solution was going to drop in their laps. There wasn't a deus exmachina waiting around the corner. There was only them versus a god--and evenwith the power they had accumulated, they were still mortal. Whathope did they have against Fate? The only way...

This was the only way.

She pushed through the doors,stepping out into the little pocket world Talitha had created. There were days,like this one, when Alinora really hated this place. Talitha was everywhere.Her magic fueled it, created it, shaped it. It no longer drew from her, but herhand was in everything. You couldn't turn around without seeing her.Which was the last thing Alinora needed--or wanted--right now.

She made for the gates. Maybe she'dvisit Elaena. Spend some time in Death's castle. Challenge Death to a game ofchess. Or poker. Or something. Anything to keep her mind off that terrible,wretched, awful woman.

Talitha slumped into the floor. Whyhad she said that? Of all the things she could have fucking said, shesaid that. To an already suicidal woman with a history ofsacrificing herself for the greater good.

Why am I such a terribleperson? She buried her face in her hands.Her only consolation was that Alinora was probably heading for the trainingroom, to ruin a few unsuspecting dummies. Lyr would probably bitch about havingto make more, but honestly, Talitha couldn't care less right then. She'd makethem herself, if it meant that Alinora had a safe, productive wayto work out her anger.

There was a distant squeal as thegates swung open. Talitha's head snapped up.

Oh no. Oh fuck. Oh, Talitha fuckingJade, you're a goddamn idiot. Shescrambled to her feet and threw open the balcony doors just in time to watchAlinora stride through the gates, head held high. Talitha turned and ran,nearly flying down the stairs in her haste to get outside.

She burst through the doors.Tracking Alinora would be hard, because as soon as she left, she probablyshadow-stepped away. But, Elaena was Alinora's handler. It wouldn't be thefirst time that Talitha had needed to contact her over Alinora disappearing.Not usually because of them having a stupid fight, though. Itwas usually Aishlynn. Or Asa. Or Lyr, once. Or. You know. Most everyone butTalitha, because normally, Talitha watched her fucking mouth.

Elaena. Babe. Need your help, please.Kind of panicking at the moment. Talithasent out the prayer, the thoughts lined with a desperate edge. Her heart washammering in her chest. Her tongue tasted of bile.

Elaena appeared, and for onceTalitha didn't even bat an eye at the way she materialized from shadow. Therewas a bored look on her face, instead of the usual bit of concern.

"If this is about Alinora,she's at the castle. Was in the middle of badgering Dad into playingchess." Elaena paused. "Pretty sure he's going to give in." Sheshrugged. "Got a fucking soft spot a mile wide. Guess you two got into it,then?"

"I said something stupid,"Talitha said. "And I want to apologize for it."

Elaena nodded. "You'll get yourchance. Go... prepare some grand gesture, or whatever it is you lovebirds do.I'll keep her out of trouble. Or whatever."

Talitha slumped. "Thanks,El."

She waved a hand. "S'my job. Godo yours."

And then she disappeared.

Talitha stared off into thedistance, over the bleak forest, where she could see the spires of Death'scastle. Alinora was in good hands, for the moment. Talitha needed to come upwith a damn good apology.

And then hope Alinora could forgivethe unforgivable.

Alinora rubbed her face. Three gamesof chess--two against Death, once against Elaena--, half a bottle of wine, anda really good spar later, and she was home. Sore and tired asfuck, but home. And dreading what she was going to find in their bedroom.

Would Talitha still be there? Or wasthis the last straw?

At the time, Alinora hadn't thoughtpast more than leaving. She hadn't thought about how it might look from theoutside. Not until her second glass of wine. She should have come home then. Butshe didn't. Instead, she took Elaena up on her offer to spar, and... leftTalitha to worry some more.

Obviously Tali would know that therehad to be very specific circumstances for Alinora to do what she was planning.It wasn't just something you rushed into half-cocked. But that wouldn't make itany easier to bear. Wouldn't make how they had left things any more comforting.Wouldn't have made it any more certain that Alinora was going to come home.

Alinora took a deep breath, andpushed open the doors.

Talitha was on the couch, lookingfidgety and nervous as hell, but also extremely soft and open in her too-bigsweater and leggings. Alinora's favorite dish was on the coffee table (oneTalitha hated dearly) and there was a mug of her favorite tea as well. Andcandles. The warm, cinnamon scented ones that Alinora only brought out onspecial occasions, because it was easier to just use magelights most of thetime.

Talitha gave her a little, crookedsmile. "So, um. I said something stupid earlier," she said, becauseof course she was just going to jump right into it.

Alinora closed the door softlybehind her, leaning into it, listening. Hoping her expression wasn't toosevere.

"And... I shouldn't have saidit. I didn't mean it. I was just... angry. And that's not. It isn't an excuse.I know better. I know that, that words hurt. That they mean things.That they can cut deep. Make scars that last a long time. And, I don't. I don'twant to do that to you? That's not the kind of person that I want to be. Not thekind of relationship that I want us to have.

"And. I'm going to try and dobetter. In the future. Whether, um. Whether you forgive me or not. But I'mreally hoping that you do, and we get to continue to this, because. You'rehonestly the best thing to ever happen to me. The light of my fucking life,honestly. And I don't want to lose you because I'm an idiot. But I mean, you'dbe well within you're rights to just. Drop me. Because I was an asshole.Majorly. Worse than I've been since---"

Alinora held up a hand. "You'reforgiven," Alinora said softly. She hadn't contemplated anything else. Hadbarely registered the words, barely realized what Talitha had said in the firstplace. All she had seen was Talitha's anger, her immediate shut down of themost obvious way to end this, before it got any worse. That probably saidsomething about her mental health, something she didn't really want to examineat that moment. "It's not like I haven't been an asshole... most of thetime."

Talitha snorted. "Yeah, but you'venever told me to--" She cut herself off.

Alinora raised an eyebrow. "Howmany times did I tell you to jump off a cliff, Tali?"

"Yeah, but you didn't mean it."

"Neither did you."

"Yeah, but mine was said out ofanger. It wasn't a joke. I wasn't teasing you. I was pissed,and frustrated, and I said something stupid. It's different."

"Are you trying to talk me outof forgiving you?" It wasn't working, but Alinora was curious anyway.

"No! Yes. Maybe! I don'tknow."

Alinora snorted. "It isn'tworking. Isn't going to work either." She walked over to her, and sat onthe couch next to her. "You said something stupid. I'll grant you that.But I don't think it was out of anger."

"No? What would you call thatthen?"

"Fear." Alinora leanedagainst her side. "You were afraid. So you said something mean. Becausethat's what we do, when we're afraid. You and me. Doesn't make it a good thing.But it's an understandable thing. So. I forgive you. Because I know you didn'tmean it. I know... that you meant the opposite, really."

"I did," Talitha murmured."Still do."

Alinora nodded. "See?" Shepaused. "Besides, if I didn't forgive you, who's going tocling to me like an octopus all night? I won't be able to sleep without that, Idon't think."

Talitha laughed, wetly. "Guessnone of the others are clingy like me, huh?"

"Not even close."

"I love you, Nora."

"I love you too, Tali,"she murmured.

Talitha kissed the top of her head."Light of my fuckin' life."

#im not sorry #prompt fills #tmq #the martyr queen #talinora #talitha jade #alinora mynerva #my writing #firesidefantasy #asks and answers

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voltron-legendary-pretender · 7 years

Text

Awaken, My Love

Summary: Prompt fill from a lovely anon - Keith hurts Lance during his Galra awakening and is really upset about it. Lance can’t bear watching the one he loves in so much pain and he does everything he can to make him feel better. Sad but fluffy with a happy ending! Whump overload >.<

*side note - they cannot put Keith in a pod while he is changing as it could mess up the process and could lead to further difficulties in the future so our lil baby boy is just gonna have to suffer for a while.

Warnings; Non-descriptive injures, mentions of blood, mentions of vomit

This has been sitting in my drafts for months now as I am a perfectionist and I felt as though there were some sections that needed a bit more umpf ya know?

I really enjoy writing for you guys please dont think I’d ever just abandon this blog I just wanted it to be as good as I could make it but in the end I decided to give myself a break and I’ve decided to post without edits!

Hope you enjoy don’t hesitate to leave a comment or a critique I read them all and welcome constructive criticism of my work :)

I am here to become a better writer so please tell me what Ii need to improve on/ what you would like to see from me next!

Panic filled Lance’s sleep-clouded mind when he was startled awake that faithful night to find his boyfriend Keith writhing around their shared bed in immense pain, releasing high-pitched screams of pure agony. They both knew this day would come, but neither of them could’ve guessed it would be so soon.

Lance swore he could feel each individual heart strings being torn to shreds as he looked on helplessly. He watched in horror as Keith’s skin began to exhibit small patches of purple and claws ripped their way through his nail-beds tearing the skin off his fingers and causing blood to flow freely from the fresh wounds. Keith spluttered out more blood along with several of his human teeth before turning to Lance, his now golden eyes glazed over from the disorientating pain.

“H-help me” he pleaded pitifully in a voice so broken Lance wondered if he’d ever be able to piece him back together.

All concept of time had faded during the ordeal, but after what must have been around 20 minutes of what could only be described as hell, Keith’s yells and cries had subsided and been replaced by soft whimpers accompanied by the silent tears we streamed down his now purple face.

As Keith fell into a restless slumber the gravity of what had just happened hit Lance full force. All their lives would be changed forever and that worried Lance.

What if Keith was different when he came around? What would become of the team? What would happen to the love they once shared?

With each awful thought came a further pang of anxiety, they landed Lance’s stomach like raindrops hitting the bottom of a tin bucket, threatening to overflow at each additional worry. Lance was tempted to wake the others, he really hated going through this alone; he could really use one of Hunk’s famous hugs right now, but deep down he knew that if everyone were to arrive into the small room it would only upset Keith more, and right now keeping Keith as comfortable and as safe as possible was priority.

The training Lance had received from Coran all those months ago when it was first discovered that Keith was part Galra had now kicked in. The “So Your Boyfriend’s Galra?” crash course had been extremely helpful to Lance and it gave him a deeper insight on how to care for Keith. Keith often suffered from bad migraines and ran abnormally high fevers from even the smallest cold, afflictions that could usually be cured by bed rest and tender words of comfort from Lance, but this, this was a whole new ball park.

Lance was soon snapped back to reality however as Keith’s whines grew louder and he once again began to thrash around on the bed.

“Okay, you can do this!” Lance reassured himself as he got off the bed and made his way to the door to fetch a first aid kit, a damp cloth and a water pouch for Keith. He was going to do exactly what Coran had instructed all those months ago, back before Lance’s worst nightmare became a reality.

Letting out a shaky sigh as the sliding door whooshed open, Lance turned back around to face Keith’s disheveled form one last time before promising;

“I’ll keep you safe love, we’ll get through this.” in a barely audible whisper, more so to calm himself than Keith.

On his arrival back things were bad.

There was a lot more blood and Keith had vomited on himself. It was as if Keith’s body was shedding itself inside and out. Clumps of hair accompanied large pieces of torn skin and broken nails on the once blue duvet that was now stained a deep purple with blood and bile. It was heart breaking. Lance was frozen in the doorway in pure horror.

Keith hadn’t noticed Lance re-enter the room, yet as he curled in on himself on the bed he feverishly chanted Lance’s name like a mantra,

“L-lance, -ance ahh ah d-don’t t l-eave pl-lease m-mak-e ahh it it s-st ah stop”

That was it.

Coran’s no touching rule be damned, Keith needed to know Lance was there for him, no way was this boy ever going to feel abandoned ever again.

Placing the first aid materials down on the bed-side locker, Lance quietly scooched up behind his beautiful boyfriend, my God, he didn’t deserve any of this pain.

A gentle rub on the back that Lance intended to be a form of comfort back-fired quickly.

No sooner had the palm of his hand made contact with Keith’s back did the latter boy let out a hiss that sounded like that of a wild panther’s, before turning around with claws bared and slashed Lance across the chest.

“D-don’t t-touch me!” He yelled as Lance flopped back into a kneeling position in disbelief. He held his hand to his aching chest and pulled it away only to find fresh crimson liquid pooling in his palm.

Sheepishly looking down Lance caught sight of the three angry claw marks that had ripped through his pajama top and were causing blood to ooze out of his once flawlessly smooth skin.

He needed help. Fast.

Grabbing the remote beside his bed he set off the alarms in the castle to wake everyone up before leaving a frantic message.

“Guys, I-I need you all down h-here right now, arghh K-Keith’s changing. I I need h-help, hurry p-please”

Before he knew it the remaining paladins had arrived accompanied by Allura and Coran. Keith was now yelling again and more blood began to stream out of his mouth. Everyone was taken aback by the scene they were witnessing but soon sprang into action to help.

It was all a blur. Lance could vaguely remember being carried to the infirmary by Hunk, along with two other concerned voices which later turned out to be Coran and Pidge, Allura and Shiro left to deal with “the Keith situation”.

Dizzy and delusional from the blood loss, Lance began to cry and apologize to Coran.

“I-I’m sorry I d-didn’t d-do wh-what ahh you you t-told me, I - I w-want-ed him to to kno-w that that I-I...”

Lance’s sobs were cut off by Coran placing his strong hands on the trembling boys shoulders before speaking “Hey look at me” he said in a voice so gentle Lance couldn’t help but comply.

“I am so proud of you, do you hear me? You did amazing, Keith will be fine, but this is an extremely traumatic thing to go through, he needs you to be there for him okay? Right now your job is to get better so you can be there for him, all you need to do right now is focus in getting better alright?”

Lance nodded meekly in response.

“That’s my boy!” Come on now let’s get you into a pod and you’ll be right in a jiffy!” Coran announced.

Right as Lance stepped into the pod the older man embraced him in a warm hug.

“We all love you Lance, were so proud of you, you did so well” were Coran’s parting words. New tears sprang from Lance’s eyes but for the first time in a long time they were tears of joy, of pride. Yeah, he did good.

Just a couple of hours later the pod door whooshed open and Lance fell into the loving arms of his second family. Everyone was there except for Keith and Shiro.

“How is he?” Lance questioned no one in particular.

“Better” Allura supplied with a grimace. “It appears the worst is over, Shiro’s with him now”

“He’s been calling your name this entire time, he thinks you hate him” Pidge interjects sadly.

“Yeah” sighed Hunk. “he’s really beat up about the whole thing, he didn’t mean it.”

“I know that!” Lance practically yells. “I gotta see him is he still in the room?”

“Yes, unfortunately moving him to the med bay would have done more harm than good at this stage” Allura stated.

“Go to him my boy!” Coran said to Lance as he was already half way down the hallway.

“Don’t have to tell me twice!” Lance yelled back down to the others.

Lance was greeted by a very tired looking Shiro at the door who let him back into the room.

Hey how you doing buddy?” Shiro whispered. It appeared Keith had passed out again and Shiro was trying to keep him as well-rested as possible.

“I’m fine, why is he in restraints?” Lance replied, motioning towards Keith who looked worse for wear. Shiro let out a deep sigh before explaining.

“After he hurt you, he went nuts, he-he said he was a monster.” Shiro looked down sadly before continuing. “We had no choice he kept hurting himself, we tied him down so he would stop, some of the wounds are pretty deep, I’m stitching them up now while he’s out.”

“Oh God” Lance’s heart was broken.

He approached the chair placed beside his boyfriend’s head and leaned down to kiss his his pain stained face as he took one of Keith’s bandaged hands into his own.

“Thank you for taking care of him Shiro. Go get some rest, I’ll take it from here” Lance said with a soft smile as he used his thumb to rub soothing circles onto the back of Keith’s injured hand.

“Are you sure Lance?” Shiro questioned.

“Yeah, totally” Lance replied instantly, eyes still locked firmly to Keith.

“I’m never gonna leave your side I promise” he whispered into his partner’s blood-soaked mullet.

“He really loves you you know” Shiro said as he stood in the door way.

“Yeah, I know. I know.”

At some point Lance must’ve dosed off, only to be awoken by the sound of Keith muttering in his sleep. His face was all screwed up and it appeared he was having a nightmare.

“ahh no no monster, m-monster no n-no Lancee no don-t leave-e me n-no ahh”

Lance felt like he could drown in the sadness that was flooding his insides at the sight of the boy he loved in so much pain.

“Ssh, I’m here, I’m here, I love you Keith, so much, shh it’s okay” Lance hushed as he stroked Keith’s hair.

With that his eyelids snapped open.

“Lance!” he gaped.

“Hello love, how are you feeling? Let me take these restraints of they can’t be comfy-”

“NO!” Keith yelled. “I’m a monster, I’m evil, I’ll just hurt you, please, don’t l-let me hurt you” Keith began to sob.

“Hey, hey it’s alright. It was an accident Keith! Ii love you babe. I’m so proud of you for making it through this, you are so strong dear” Lance consoled him as he unlocked the restraints before opening his arms up for a hug. Keith seemed to hesitate for a moment before throwing himself full-force into Lance’s warm embrace.

“I- I was-s so so scared” he hiccuped out in between sobs.

“I know darling, I know. I’m here now, I’ll never leave you, we’re gonna get through this okay?” Lance said softly as he planted kisses across Keith’s neck and shoulders. They held each other for some time before Lance broke contact.

“Let’s get you cleaned up a bit yeah?” he suggested. Keith nodded before nuzzling back into Lance’s chest one last time before sitting back.

Accessing the extent of his remaining untreated injuries, Lance concluded that at least some of the deeper wounds should be attended to before they got some much needed rest.

Lance worked slowly and gently, whispering words of encouragement and showering Keith with kisses whenever the battered boy began whimpering in pain. After a while, despite how careful Lance was, it was all becoming a bit too much for Keith. His breathing became audibly deeper and faster as he squeezed his eyes shut and gripped onto Lance’s shirt.

Noticing this change, Lance placed down the antiseptic soaked cloth he was holding and tipped Keith’s chin upwards to meet the other boy’s gaze and examine his face.

“I-I don’t feel good” Keith hiccuped.

Lance felt his forehead and sighed. “You’re getting feverish again. I think we’ll leave this til later, okay? Do you need your bucket again?” he asked tenderly as he swiped Keith’s greasy hair from his face.

Keith simply nodded as he began clutching his stomach letting out little whines of pain.

“Here you go love” Lance held the bucket in front of Keith as the shaking boy retched violently into it, bringing up nothing but bile and a little blood.

“It’s okay, your okay” Lance reassured as he rubbed small circles on the small of Keith’s back. Keith merely whimpered and leaned back into Lance’s comforting embrace in response.

“Hurts” he said in a cracked voice.

“I know pet, I know” Lance sympathized as he used a fresh cloth to wipe Keith’s face clean.

“Here have some of this and then we’ll go to bed alright?” Lance reasoned, guiding the pouch of water to Keith’s bloody lips. He waited patiently as the smaller boy took a few small sips before screwing up his face in pain once more as he clutched his stomach.

“Okay, that’s enough for now.” Lance soothed.

“I’m just gonna strip the bed and we can cuddle okay?” Keith nodded furiously at this suggestion and Lance giggled.

“Alright, lemme just put you on the chair for a minute and I’ll bring you right back, okay?” Keith nodded once more.

As Lance began to slowly guide Keith off the bed and into a standing position he could feel the other boy trembling.

“Are you alright to do this love?” He asked concerned and Keith nodded in response yet again. He had to brave! He was already so weak and pathetic. This isn’t who Keith was.

However, standing even with the support of Lance proved to be too much for Keith, knees buckling beneath him, only to be saved from crashing to the floor by Lance’s arms.

“S-sorry I-I thought I c-could”

“Ssh, it’s alright love, I’ve got you, I’ve got you” Lance reassured as he carried Keith bridal-style to the chair, He planted a quick kiss on the top of Keith’s head before getting to work on quickly changing the bed sheets. Lance decided to use the red duvet with matching pillows that had patterns of smiling kittens all over them, he knew they were Keith favourite, even if he was too stubborn to admit it.

Within a few minutes both boys were wrapped up in their own poorly constructed blanket burrito for two. They held onto each other simply starring into one another’s eyes.

“You’re beautiful” Lance smiled lazily, Keith’s new cat-like ears pricked up and Lance laughed softly. Keith’s blush turned into a frown.

“You know you don’t have to say those things to me anymore. I- I know I’m not a monster anymore but-but you don’t need to stay with me, I’m not what I was, who I was you don’t have to -” he began to ramble before Lance stopped him by leaning in for another kiss. This one was deeper, more needy than the many that came before, yet it was still soft and warm and not at all harsh in the way that was so uniquely Lance it made Keith’s head spin and his heart flutter.

“Don’t be so silly” Lance spoke as they broke apart.

“You’re still the same Keith I fell in love with, you’re just a lil fluffy now.” Lance spoke softly motioning towards Keith’s new purple coat.

“You’re not a monster, what happened was an accident okay? I love you. So much. Keith your gorgeous inside and out, my God you’re so beautiful. You’re the sweetest person I’ve ever met, when we were together I feel like I’m with a better version of myself. Keith you’re my best friend, you deserve the entire universe and I’m just so happy I get to share my little section of it with you everyday, I could never ask for anymore” As Lance spoke he wiped the tears that were now spilling down Keith’s face.

Thank you Lance he sniffled into the crook of the other boys neck as he listened closely for the gentle and constant rhythm of Lance’s heartbeat.

“Your m-unm --se” he mumbled.

“What was that dear?” Lance questioned.

“I said your my universe Lance” Keith smiled up at his boyfriend proudly, showing the first signs of being his normal corny self again.

That night they fell asleep in each others arms, as they had done so many before, tentatively listening to the beating of their hearts and feeling the rise and fall of each others chests as they drifted into a peaceful slumber.

They’d be okay. They had each other.

#klance #klangst #whump #they're so in love #they'll be okay #galra keith #voltron #vld #l

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goldsteinsistersimagines · 7 years

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Better Late Than Never

Requested by anonymous: i have a tina x reader request where tina and newt get married but tina's heart belong to reader but reader is a woman and tina is a bit prejudiced herself. Tina is tired of feeling this unhappy but is she willing to give up on her "perfect life" and go after the real love of her life? Pls make it angsty and fluffy!!! Bonus points if queenie is tina x reader's #1 shipper!!

Pairing: Tina Goldstein x fem!reader, Tina Goldstein x Newt Scamander

Warnings:

A/N: AaaaNnnDDddd here’s my trASH

“Newt asked me to marry him.”

Those words felt like an icicle pierced through your heart. You knew nothing major was ever going to happen between you and Tina, but it still hurt. Despite the growing pain you felt in your chest, you smiled and congratulated her, and even offered to help out with the wedding. You wanted to kick yourself in the face.

Newt was marrying the woman of his dreams, and Tina was marrying the man of her dreams. That’s what you supposed, anyway. One always assumes the couple getting married is extremely happy and consider each other their soulmates. The wedding ran smoothly. Everything was perfect. At least the part you saw.

“Queenie!” One of the bridesmaids called, bursting into the dressing room Queenie was in. “Tina needs you.”

The blonde hurried down the hall and heard crying behind the door. She softly knocked on the door. “Tina?” There was no answer. “Teen, I’m coming in, okay?”

Queenie turned the handle and entered the room. When she looked around, she saw Tina on the floor crying in her dress, two bridesmaids on the ground with her desperately trying to console her. When they saw Queenie was in the room, they backed away and left the room. The blonde knelt beside her sister and put an arm around her shoulder.

“It’s your wedding day, shouldn’t you be happy?”

“I-I’m sorry.” The brunette wiped her tears. “I don’t know what came over me. I guess I just got overwhelmed with it all. It’s such a huge commitment.”

Queenie nodded. “It is.”

“I don’t know what’s wrong with me.” Tina gave a dry laugh.

She might not have been able to identify what was wrong, but Queenie knew. Tina might have been able to suppress her feelings so she couldn’t feel them anymore, but Queenie could read them loud and clear. It was you who was holding her back. And she didn’t even know it.

“Are you sure you want to go through with this, honey?” The younger sister gently asked.

The brunette nodded. “Yes. I’ve been waiting for this day for a long time.” The woman began to stand up and Queenie helped her. “I’m marrying Newt Scamander, the kindest, most gentle, loving man I’ve ever known.” She looked at her sister. “He’s perfect.”

“Ma and Pa would be proud,” the blonde said as she linked her arm with Tina’s. “Now come on, let’s fix your makeup.”

Tina had moved in with Newt after they got married and the two left soon after for their honeymoon. Queenie decided it was time to move out of the apartment she had shared with her sister. Conveniently, your roommate had moved out a couple of months before so the blonde moved in with you.

You loved living with one of your best friends. The two of you would go out on weekends or just stay in talking about anything and everything. Before, you went to Queenie for everything, but now she knew even the smallest details of your life, being that she was never more than 10 feet away (except for when you were both at work, of course).

Though she already knew about your thing with Tina, she never brought it up since the wedding. But she knew there were still lingering feelings. She could feel it when she visited Tina. And she could feel it in the moments you were quiet because you saw something that reminded you of her or whenever she mentioned the woman.

You were surprised by how fast winter came, since spring seemed like it wasn’t so long ago. It had been 7 months since Tina and Newt’s wedding, and Queenie was getting ready to visit Tina.

“Are you sure you don’t want to come with me?”

“I’m sure. I’ve got some work I need to finish,” you lied.

“Okay then. I’ll be back in a few hours. Try not to burn the house down.” The blonde winked.

You feigned offense. “I would never!” The two of you giggled. “Alright now shoo!” You waved your hand towards the door as you took a pen from your desk.

“Okay, okay. Bye!” The blonde put on her scarf before heading out the door.

“Bye!”

“Here you go,” Tina said as she placed a cup of tea in front of Queenie.

“Thanks, Teen.” The blonde looked around the house. “Where’s Newt?”

“Oh, you know him. Always busy in his study or in his suitcase.”

Queenie noticed how lackluster Tina’s response was. In fact, she hadn’t seemed too happy since Queenie had arrived.

“Is... Everything okay?” The younger sister asked.

“Yeah, everything’s great,” The older woman said. The woman looked down. “Queenie...” She started.

“Yeah, Teen?”

“I’m... Pregnant.”

Queenie’s eyes widened. “Really? That’s so wonderful!” The blonde squealed and held her sister’s hand. Tina gave a faint smile but didn’t seem to be celebrating. Before long, the brunette started to cry, and Queenie was reminded of the day of her wedding.

“T, what’s wrong?” The blonde switched seats so she was right next to her sister.

“I don’t know,” the woman sniffled. “I have a perfect life here. I have a loving husband, a lovely house, a baby on the way...It’s all I could ever want.” She looked into her sister’s sympathetic blue eyes. “Why do I still feel so empty?”

“Is this really what you wanted?” Queenie asked.

Tina remained silent.

The blonde pursed her lips. “I never planned on telling you this because I thought maybe... Maybe you’d come around. Tina, just admit it. You’re not in love with Newt. You love the idea of him.”

“That’s n-not true,” the brunette hiccuped.

“So you don’t find it weird how you feel safer in public with him but still feel nothing? Or how whenever he leans over to kiss you, you hesitate just a little? Or, you know, how you don’t seem to be too thrilled to be having his child right now? Why is that, Tina?” The blonde had just dropped a bomb on her sister, leaving Tina completely speechless. “You wanna lie and tell me it’s not because you’ve thinking about (Y/N) after all this time?”

“I’m not in love with her,” the brunette denied.

“You liar!” Queenie stood up. The woman rarely ever got angry, but this was beyond frustrating. “I’m a legilimens for Merlin’s sake!” She began taking her coat. “I can’t help you if you don’t want to be helped.” She looked at her sister. “I’m sorry, Tina. But you need to make a decision.”

And with that, the woman apparated out of the house.

You sat on the couch, distracted from the book you were reading. You wondered how Tina was doing after all this time. All you ever got was updates from Queenie. It wasn’t that you didn’t want to see her, it was just... You shut your eyes.

‘She’s with Newt now. She’s with Newt now,’ you repeated over and over again in your mind.

And then your thoughts drifted to the night you and Tina had kissed. Both of you were fairly drunk and your filter was gone.

A hazy memory started to form in your mind.

“Okay, but.... But... I’d totally kiss you.” You were slurring your words at this point.

“You know what? Me too.”

The two of you had shared a kiss. And later on, you would share more. But once Tina started hanging out with Newt, it all ended. It was never spoken of again, and you had noticed Tina acted differently around you ever since then. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t do the same. It was like if the two of you got too close to each other, there’d be no pulling you apart from each other. And that was... unacceptable. Dangerous, even. So you let her go. And now she was with Newt. Happily married, you assumed.

Suddenly, you heard the doorknob turn and you quickly snapped out of your thoughts.

“Hey,” you greeted.

“Hey,” Queenie replied. She stepped out of the heels she was wearing and started walking towards you. “Hey, what are you doing tonight?”

“More like WHO am I doing!” You exclaimed.

Queenie glared at you and you immediately wiped the grin off your face.

You cleared your throat and closed your book. “No one. I’m free. What’s up?”

“We’re going to the blind pig.” The woman huffed and started heading toward her room to change.

“Alright!” You jumped up from the couch eagerly. Both of you could use a night out.

The next weekend, you heard a knock at the door. You walked out of your room at the same time Queenie did and the two of you looked at each other.

“Were you expecting anyone today?” You asked.

The woman shook her head.

Another knock, this time more urgent.

You walked to the door and opened it. You saw a tired Tina standing at the doorway. She looked like she had been crying. Your heartstrings tugged at you. You couldn’t bear the sight of seeing Tina sad. The two of you made eye contact briefly. And you felt the urge to kiss her again like you used to.

“Are you okay, Teen?” Queenie gently asked. Both of you noticed the woman had a couple of suitcases with her.

“I’m fine. I just... Had a talk with Newt.”

“Is everything okay?” You questioned.

“Could I... Could I stay here for a while?” The brunette asked meekly.

You nodded and gestured to the inside of your apartment. “Of course. Come in.” You helped her with her bags.

You and Queenie allowed Tina some time to settle in. You had offered your bedroom to her and you were going to sleep on the pull out couch.

As you set up the couch, Queenie came up from behind.

“I’m going to go to the store real quick,” the woman said quietly.

“Okay. I’ll be here.”

The blonde nodded and left the apartment.

You had just spread your blanket on the couch when you heard your bedroom door creak open. Tina was already in her pajamas, despite the fact that it was only 5 o’clock. You sat on your newly made “bed” and patted the seat beside you. The brunette joined you on the couch and the two of you sat in silence for a bit.

“So... What happened between you and Newt?” You asked.

Tina looked down at the ground. “I don’t think it’s going to work.”

“Oh,” you responded, not knowing what else to say.

The woman groaned and lay down on the couch bed. You decided to lay down as well, and the two of you faced each other. You traced Tina’s face with your eyes. She looked pretty much the same as she did when you last saw her, only she looked much more tired.

“I missed you,” the brunette whispered. She traced your arm with her hand and inching closer to you, allowing your foreheads to touch.

“I missed you, too,” you said. You weren’t sure about the boundaries, so you stayed slightly reserved. Tina started to cry.

“I made a mistake,” she sobbed.

“What?” You tucked her hair back and placed your hand on her cheek, wiping away her tears.

“I should have never married him.”

You sat up on the bed. “Tina, did he do something to you?” Your protective instincts started to kick in.

Tina shook her head. “No. It was my fault.” She looked at you. “I was too scared.”

You knit your eyebrows together, unclear of what she was trying to say. “What do you mean?”

“What we had... I loved you, (Y/N). I still do.” The woman began to cry again. “And I ruined everything. I’m so sorry.”

You didn’t know what to do. You didn’t know how to make things better. It wasn’t like you could put a band-aid on the wound and kiss it better.

You put a hand on the brunette’s shoulder.

“I forgive you.” You rubbed comforting circles on the woman’s shoulder until her cries turned into mere hiccups. You stood up and got a glass of water for her.

“Here, drink this.” The woman sat up and drank the water.

“Thank you.”

You nodded. When she was finished, you took the glass and placed it on the table beside you. You turned back around and opened your arms for a hug. You felt a sense of peace having Tina in your arms again.

You kissed the top of her head and stroked her arm.

Tina drew in a breath. “(Y/N)...”

“Yeah?”

“I’m pregnant.”

You froze. Tina pulled away so she could look at you. You stared at her blankly.

“You’re...”

“Pregnant.”

“Newt’s?”

The woman nodded.

“Does he know?” You asked.

“Yes. It made leaving that much harder.” Tina looked out the window.

“How far along are you?”

“A little more than four months now.”

“Wow,” you breathed. Your eyes fell to Tina’s stomach. “There’s a baby in there.”

Tina let out a weak laugh. “There is,” she confirmed, wiping away her tears.

You looked up at the woman. “May I?” You pointed to her stomach.

The brunette nodded. You placed your hands on either side of Tina’s waist and leaned down so your ear was pressed up against her stomach. You heard light swishing sounds and a faint rapid heartbeat.

“Hi, there,” you murmured. “It’s been a rough few days, huh? Sorry about that.”

Tina smiled at the interaction.

“Your mommy doesn’t always know how to take care of herself, but we’ll remind her. We’ll make sure you’re always taken care of. I promise.” You kissed Tina’s stomach and sat up straight again. You took Tina’s hand in yours and you noticed she was tearing up again. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, I just... I was just thinking... This is how it all should have been.”

“It’s not too late to start over.” You looked into the brunette’s eyes.

“No, it’s not.”

Six years later:

“Mama, mama!” Sophie ran over to you excitedly and tugged on your shirt. You picked up the little girl and kissed her on the cheek.

“Hi, baby girl!” You grinned. “Did you have fun with your dad today?” You nodded at Newt, who nodded back.

“Yeah! He let me ride the Hippogriff today!”

You rose an eyebrow and looked at Newt. “He did now, did he?”

Newt rubbed the back of his neck and shrugged. “Only for a bit. I watched the entire time.”

“Alright.” You turned Sophie. “How about we don’t tell mommy we did something mildly dangerous today? Save us both from getting chewed out.” You looked at Newt, who let out a small laugh.

The little girl nodded. You smiled and planted another kiss on her cheek.

You turned back to Newt. “Oh, and dinner Friday! You’re coming, right?”

The man grinned. “Wouldn’t miss it.”

“Great!” You bounced Sophie on your hip. “Okay, let’s go home!”

When you got home, you put Sophie down and she immediately went over to Tina.

“Mommy!”

The brunette kissed the little girl on the head. “Oh, I missed you today!”

Tina put Sophie down and she ran into the living room to go play. You leaned up against the kitchen counter and eyed Tina.

The woman laughed. “What?”

“I just think you look really beautiful.” You grinned. You made your way over to Tina and put your hands around her waist. The two of you shared a kiss.

It took a while to get here, but you were both here now and you couldn’t have been happier. After all, it was always better late than never.

#Tina Goldstein x reader #Porpentina Goldstein #Fantastic Beasts fanfic #fbawtft fanfic #Tina Goldstein fanfic #honestly why am I a literal trash can #sorry guys

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acrispyapple · 7 years

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50 more interesting questions

Rules: fill this out and tag at least one person you’d like to know more about! Or just fill it out! Or don’t! Answer only some of them! Make up your own questions! “What kind of requirement is that”, you ask? A reasonable one! Who am I to tell you what to do? Anything goes!

Tagged by @incorrectmidc i had this open for days and i answered a few questions per night lol @o0w0o and @deathbymidnightcinderella <3

1. What kind of food can’t you stand? spicy stuff and umm food loaded with exotic spices / herbs

2. If you could choose one minor inconvenience to never have to deal with again, what would you pick? my mouse ending up double clicking after a year or so

3. Have you got any useless talents? i have way too much trivia and animal facts. plus random skills with no practical use. oh and playing the piano is also a useless talent for me since i don’t really “use” it

4. If you were really really good at one thing, what would it be? my answer isn’t an “if” thing lol. i have a really good memory. it really helps with mostly anything i do + it makes studying easier. but sometimes people think it’s creepy that i remember little things about them, they think i keep notes about them or something lol-- but i really do just remember.

5. Name a few people you think are extremely good-looking - umm neil caffrey (matt bomer) from white collar, nick burkhardt (david giuntoli) from grimm, daniel shaw (brandon routh) from chuck -- i seem to have a type haha. omg i forgot jo in-sung. i’ve always thought he was handsome!

6. What was your favorite way to pass the time as a kid? i was a pretty boring kid. i just read books, watched cartoons, and organized things. as a kid i’d look at my toys but never really play with them because i liked seeing them all set up nicely. i just kept collecting stuff i liked. the most i’d do that’s remotely active was play with my dogs

7. What is something you’re proud of? i do well academically and i learn fast. and somehow i’m proud of how i’ve remained the same over the years.

8. What’s one character flaw in people that you just can’t tolerate? i don’t know if this is considered a character flaw but i really dislike poor manners haha. it drives me crazy when people open their mouth while chewing or if it’s too noisy. i die a bit inside. besides table manners and manners in general, i dislike people who are rowdy during inappropriate times.

9. Do you consider yourself to be more of a leader or a follower? both but to avoid stress sometimes i just want to follow. i’m a bit of a perfectionist / rule follower so i get frustrated a lot. i know not everyone is like a machine but it’s hard with my ocd lol. and no this isn’t just me saying ocd like most people when referring to certain things, i actually do have it and i have medication for it

10. What kind of student are/were you? normal i guess. i got along well with people, i didn’t fail anything, and i never rebelled or did anything wild. it was uneventful lol. i’m still technically a student now, but i see it more as an adult thing.

11. Butterfly effect question! Has there ever been a seemingly minor decision you’ve made (at the time) that ended up having a profound influence on your life? i’m sure everyone has one

12. Name your most irrational fear/aversion well it’s not a fear per se, but i have an aversion to most asian food, sorta? the smell sets me off especially if it has a bunch of spices or herbs in it. my nose is just sensitive and i get affected easily by strong scents. but i’m fine with japanese food, maybe some korean and chinese stuff. for fears, iono, i don’t think it’s irrational to be afraid of spiders and big cockroaches ><

13. Are there any fictional characters you find especially relatable? a bunch haha but it’s mostly people associating them with me first. i’m not tsundere..... how dare they

14. If you drink, what kind of drunk are you? Alternatively, what sort of person are you at parties? i don’t think i’ve ever gotten drunk the way people imagine people getting drunk to be like. i remain the same except i get a headache. i don’t really change at all. and in parties i guess i just stay close to my friends. stranger danger lmao

15. Do you fall in love easily? Or does it usually take a long time for you to trust someone? umm no i do not. i mean i can trust them fine but i don’t think i can believe their feelings until they can prove it isn’t just a short time attraction. i’m in for long term stuff so i don’t really wanna waste time if it’s not headed there. but yeah currently in a long term relationship

16. Would you rather have one close friend or 100 casual friends? having fewer friends makes it easier for me to update all of them without getting tired of repeating the same story over and over haha

17. Do you consider yourself to be more of a slob or a neat-freak? always organized and no one’s allowed to touch my things haha

18. Describe a place (imaginary or real) that you would find incredibly cozy i’ve always wanted a seating area near a huge window with a good view, bunch of pillows, earphones + music

19. Do you have kids? If not, do you want them someday? nah i don’t think i can handle it. i’d probably go insane trying to control them and making them become my idea of what a person should be like

20. What was your favorite book as a child? the chronicles of narnia, still love it to this day because it’s really written well

21. Name one thing you just don’t get what all the hype is about WHAT IN THE WORLD DOES A FIDGET SPINNER DO -- yeah i’m sorry, i think it’s stupid

22. Name one thing that you think is tragically underrated i should have an answer for this but i totally forgot lol

23. If you had to be glued to a person for a month, real or fictional (who you have never met), who would you choose? since im in the midcin fandom i’ll just say byron

24. What’s something you’d like the chance to do someday? visit all the haunted places i’ve ever read about, and prolly explore old ruins. i was way into archaeological finds etc way back

25. Do you typically speak your mind when you have a controversial opinion? Or do generally prefer to not rock the boat? i try to say it in the most courteous way possible. i can’t keep it to myself because it would bother me and my mind would just dwell on it forever but i also don’t like offending people haha

26. What’s the dumbest fad you’ve been caught up in? sTiCkY cApS in chat (but i stopped after a month okay, and i was 12)

27. What’s something you thought was cool as a kid/adolescent, but now cringe at yourself for? typing in sTiCkY CaPs. kill 12 year old me pls

28. What’s a trait you consider to be very admirable? being kind and yet still firm when needed even when it comes to friends. i really admire people who don’t just blindly agree with their peers

29. Is there a particular kind of item people always tend to give you as gifts? (For instance, people always get you things with ducks on them because you like ducks, etc.) people give me stuff with owls, bears, hedgehogs, or stars because i love them. i also love stationery and pens. i like getting different colors and i never use them. i just keep them forever haha

30. Do you speak multiple languages? Which ones? i know a bit of stuff from other languages but not enough to be proud of it. i don’t want to be a poser and claim yeaaaahh i speak this and that lol

31. Would you rather live in the big city or the countryside? city please. i hate the quiet countryside. it’s like if someone comes to kill you and there’s no one around and you’d be all “this is why i should’ve been in the city with people everywhere”

32. Has there ever been something you were certain you’d hate, but ended up loving? byron wagner from midcin. when i first started and i saw him i was all, ehh eyepatch dude. so edgy. lmao. i even purposely skipped him during certain events and i regret that now.

33. Do you mind being the center of attention, or do you prefer the spotlight to be on someone else? i don’t want to be the center of attention, i’d feel awkward

34. Favorite holiday? the usual, christmas and new years eve... but i miss having an actual christmas where it isn’t summer...

35. Are you a more go-with-the-flow type of person, or do you need to have things planned meticulously? i always have a plan lol

36. Is there something you loved so much you wish you could forget it and experience it all over again? (A tv show, book, series–anything.) hmm, i can watch something over and over with no problem. all good

37. What hobbies do you have? reading (but it’s mostly fantasy and sci-fi), watching crap, annoying my dogs, playing video games, making stories in my head. I WISH I COULD WRITE AND DO IMAGERY WELL. oh well

38. If you could have a superpower, but it was only mildly useful, what ability would you want to have? the ability to moisturize instantly, one click. that’ll save me time daily

39. Something people are always surprised to learn about you that i like video games and anime lol. and that i’m happy to talk to them T_T

40. Something that took you way too long to figure out i still don’t know how to knife. how to knife~ i mean how to slice things or chop things or do anything in the kitchen

41. Worst injury you’ve had? is it considered an injury when you’ve had to get 4 major surgeries in a year? i mean i guess tending to / waiting for the surgery scars to get better can be considered an injury since it took a while and it was sorta a pain

42. Any morbid fascinations? umm, i can’t think of one

43. Describe your sense of humor i don’t really know lol. i make a lot of jokes and sometimes it breaks the mood for people lol

44. If you had to be born in another era/place, which would you choose? i really like princess stuff but the real medieval stuff would be dirty people who don’t take baths and really horrible stuff so maybe just the fantasy version of that + high speed internet

45. Something you are irredeemably bad at not rambling when i really like something. to the people who’ve ever had to listen to me whenever i got excited about something-- i’m sorry

46. Something that sucked but you’re glad you went through going to a nature retreat thing 3 months ago or something. i had no internet and it made me cry inside but i guess it was fine

47. Would you rather have a really godawful ugly tattoo in a place that is only slightly inconvenient to conceal with clothing (upper arm, thigh, etc.), or the coolest, most beautiful tattoo ever in the middle of your face? (Neither tattoo can be removed or concealed with makeup, and the ugly tattoo will deeply offend anyone who sees it.) i don’t really want tattoos in general so i guess the ugly one.

48. Are you more of an optimist or a pessimist? optimist

49. What would be the most flattering compliment someone could give you? something that isn’t physical or shallow. i’d be really happy if people noticed my achievements or if they liked something about my personality-- or if they found me funny lol

50. Something you feel people often misunderstand about you that i’m not nice lol because i keep to myself unless spoken to irl + that unimpressed scowl i always have. it’s like my default facial expression!

not forcing anyone to do it since it’s very long, just tagging for the sake of tagging! and i think most of the people i know have already been tagged? i’ve seen this tagged post done by most of them lol

@ashnable @nimmywik @captiveotomeprincess @otometrashcan @princessdiarymdc @arimii @madamemalfoy21 @kinkymint @oh-my-otome

#tag game #personal #50 more interesting questions

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