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thot4ellie · 1 month

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oh sweetheart pt 4

pairing: boxer!ellie x f! jesses sister!reader

word count: 6.6k

rating: 18+ (smut will be coming in later parts)

warnings: boxer!ellie, fighting/boxing, flirting, blood, weed, alcohol, joel is dead in this :(, kissing, sexual interaction (almost im getting there pls!) talk of abusive relationships, cheating mentioned, smoking, talk of death, talk of mourning (lmk if im forgetting anything) ellie likes coffee lol, also i post w no specific character descriptions besides being female :)

summary: you and ellie spend the day together, your luck turns and you both realize you’re not alone anymore.

author notes: hi guys sorry this is later than expected! got a promotion at work and it’s kept me a bit busy, but reader talking ab her ex gf???? there’s no name yet for a reason (hint hint) and with that i just want to say that personas of a character im writing do not reflect back on the actual character and it’s just a plot twist i thought id throw in for later down the line! anyways pls forgive me for being late i pulled an all nighter and i finished this so i will go back and edit soon! thank you for reading! pls comment like reblog and follow!

part 1 | part 2 | part 2.5 | part 3

series masterlist | main masterlist

from the river to the sea, palestine will be free 🇵🇸

READ: this account stands with palestine, and so— i require everyone who interacts to educate themselves, and support/donate. READ THESE; 1 and 2, HELP HERE, BOYCOTT. silence is complicity, do not scroll past this.

DO NOT BUY THE REMASTER, TLOU2, TLOU1, OR ANY GAME FROM NAUGHTY DOG! neil druckmann (the creator) is a zionist. PLEASE READ THIS. AND REBLOG THIS.

the sun beamed from the window in your bedroom, creating a pattern of light shining across your comforter. your eyes flutter open as you were took in the brightness covering your room. you cursed yourself in your head for not closing the curtains. you looked at the clock that was reading 8:48am,.

you realized you definitely drank too much last night and now you’re suffering the consequences. you take a little while to gather yourself before you went to get up from your bed, throwing the blankets over the top of you to sit up. all you wanted to do was think about last night as you were interrupted by the sight of her tattooed arm, resting over your waist holding you against her, you being unable to move as thoughts of last night played in your head as you try to ignoring the pounding.

ellie.

you guys outside smoking last night enjoying each others company. the way she got so close to your lips that you could feel her breath. ellie and you hanging out at the bar with dina and jesse. ellie walking you home and giving you her jacket. her agreeing to come up to your apartment, the tension that floated in the air every second you were each other. the way sweetheart rolled off her tongue when she talked you. getting high on your couch and kissing her as she pulled you on top of her. the way the she moved your hair out of your face before falling asleep. admitting to her that you liked her and that she felt the same way about you.

she liked you.

ellie stirred, arm around you as you were caught up in your thoughts. you heard her take breathe deep in her sleep as she pulled you even closer, your back pressing against her chest. you couldn’t believe this was happening. you and ellie fell asleep in your bed last night. kissing her and being with her has clouded your thoughts since you met her and now…. she has her arm around your waist fast asleep breathing you in.

the way your lips would connect with hers, if they would move perfectly in sync with each, fitting like two puzzle pieces together. how her heavy hands traced inches of your body, sliding her hands up and down your hips and thighs…

your eyes felt droopy as you got comfortable against ellie, drowning in the scent of her that took over your sheets and pillows. you cuddled into ellie’s strong chest that she held you against her. you moved your own arm to lay across hers as you fell back to sleep, now remembering everything that happened last night and what led to this moment of you waking up next to each other.

a couple hours, you stir around and wake yourself, only to find the bed empty. your heart drops realizing ellie was gone and didn’t say goodbye. did she not mean what she said last night? you told her you liked her and she left. overthinking was your specialty.

as you pulled the blankets over your head ready to sulk the entire day in end over what happened, you decided you were going to shower the night off before you spent the hours upset. you got up and headed into your bathroom, turned on the shower and got undressed. you took about thirty minutes washing your hair and body, despite not wanting to wash off the scent of ellie that you were wrapped in. you turned off the shower, got out and dried off as wrapped yourself in a huge fuzzy pink towel and as opened the door to your bedroom, you saw her.

ellie was there sitting on your bed facing the bathroom door, with two coffee mugs in her hand.

“good morning sweetheart,” she spoke softly.

“hi els,” you blushed, “i thought you left..” you told her shyly.

“i wouldn’t just leave after last night,” she responded, “i told you we’d talk sweetheart.”

“yes you did,” you utter, looking at her as you smiled sweetly and adjusted the towel around you.

“do you want to go to breakfast?” she asked, “theres this nice diner by my apartment if you wanted to walk.”

“yes that sounds perfect el!” you said, excited at the sound of food in your stomach.

you told ellie you’d get dressed and meet her in the living room. she left the room and you walked over to your dresser. your thoughts piled as your picked out your outfit.

she stayed. ellie stayed. your mood changed at the sight of her and you were so glad that last night meant something and you weren’t just drunk. flashes of ellie laying in your bed as she faced you and the way she touched you, the way her skin felt on yours. it was intoxicating.

you changed and left your bedroom to find ellie sitting on your couch. she was focused on avatar the last air-bender streaming over your large tv screen. (the animated series ofc!) she reached to get the coffee she made and handed it to you as you took a seat next to her.

“i love this show.” you spoke as you wrapped your hands around the cup and sipped on your still warm coffee.

“yeah toph is so badass- the best part of the show,” ellie laughed.

you guys finished the episode in comfortable silence until you spoke up and asked ellie if she still wanted to get breakfast. she said yes as she took her last sip, held her hand out motioning for your mug. you handed it to her as both got up. her putting them both in your kitchen sink and you grabbed your tote bag from your bedroom. ellie grabbed her bookbag from your living floor and threw it over her shoulder as she met you by your entry area. you both exited your apartment and you started the walk to the cafe, ellie leading you since she knew the way.

as you walked, ellie talked about jurassic park which she just watched the other day and how she loved the movie series which lead to her telling you about the time she went to a history museum for her birthday when she was 15, how exciting it was seeing the dinosaurs up close and she managed to spill at least 20 dinosaur facts in half the walk.

she told you about the space section they had and how fucking cool it was to sit in the space shuttle they had there. you laugh as she tells you that she’s gonna be the next person who goes to space. she points out the spaceship pin she has on her backpack, telling you its one of her favorite things she’s ever been gifted.

you loved hearing ellie talk about the things that she loves. she told you she collects superhero cards and reads comics, “like a nerd” she said. she tells you about her favorite songs to play on guitar. she told you she can’t wait to play for you sometime. ellie asked you about your favorite songs, mentally taking note of them because she will be teaching herself how to play one to impress you.

as you continue walking, you take in the scenery surrounding you on the street you walked. your eyes spotted the wire benches that were spaced out throughout the street, the flower stand on a far corner ahead, and the small gas station and convenience store up ahead. as you made it a bit further, you saw a bookstore coming up on the corner as you and ellie walked side by side. “oh my god ellie! do you mind if we go in?” you asked.

“yeah i love this place,” she responded as she opened the door for you to walk in. the bell chimed and you were amazed at the sight of the long book shelves that covered the walls and littered in columns down the center. there was a section of comfy chairs towards the back you could see peeking out behind a cart of books waiting to be unloaded. you see plants hanging from the ceiling in front of the tall windows towards the side of the bookshop.

“ellie! oh my gosh! how nice to see you!” you heard as you followed the sound of the voice. it was a short older lady probably around her 60s, with long grey hair and she walked with a cane. she made her way over and engulfed ellie in a hug. “oh my! how have you been?” the lady said as she pulled away, “and who’s this lovely lady?” as she grabbed your hand to shake.

ellie laughed as she said, “miss ashley, this is y/n.”

“oh you’re lovely!” the sweet old lady said towards you, “ellie doesn’t bring people around so its nice to see she has some friends, especially such pretty ones!” miss ashley laughed and gave you a warm smile.

ellie blushed, “ash please… don’t embarrass me,” she said jokingly putting face into her hands.

“oh nonsense! im just making conversation!” she exclaimed as she let go of your hands, “its so nice to meet you!”

“its nice to meet you too miss ashley!” you responded.

“oh please that makes me feel old, just call me ash! i insist please,” she laughed.

“okay ash,” you smiled, “i love this place, this is what i imagine heaven feels like.” you laughed.

“well you wouldn’t be happening to be looking for a job, would you?” she joked but your attention was caught as soon as she said those words.

“you’re hiring?” you said almost shocked. you didn’t want to get your hopes up but you’ve been looking for a job since you moved here and you’ve been having no luck. but this place… it was unbelievably beautiful and you could only imagine the peace you would feel working in a place like this.

“yes!” ash said to you, “since my husband passed, its getting hard to keep up with everything, i’ve been looking for the right person to help, ellie helps in her free time, but i cant make her do everything and theres no much i can without some help most days.” she said sounding a little defeated at the mention of her husband.

“well i’d love to come help! this would be great for both of us,” you said towards ash but your eyes met ellie as you spoke, hoping you didn’t cross a boundary with ellie.

“well think about it and get back to me!,” she said and then continued, “now go look around girls! i’ve got something something to do back in the office, but don’t leave without saying goodbye!” she said as she disappeared to a side room behind the cashier counter.

ellie looked at you and tried to apologize, for what miss ashley said and that she hoped she wasn’t too forward, but you just laughed and said that it was funny, and that you didn’t mind the sweet old lady who clearly loved her and meant no harm. curiosity got the best of you as you asked ellie how she knows the lady who might be the nicest person you’ve ever met.

“i actually live in the building next door,” she started as you guys made your way down an isle of fiction books but you stopped in your tracks and interrupted her, “you practically live above a bookstore that’s so cool el!”

“yeah i guess it is, i’ve known her since we moved, my dad was friends with her husband, so we used to come here all the time, it’s one of my favorite places.” ellie told you, “it would be cool for you to work here, i know you’re looking and i wish i could do more to help her but she seems to love you already.” she finished.

“are you sure that’s okay? you’ve just known her for so long and you live righ-“

she cut off your rambling off, “sweetheart it’s actually a great idea and i think you should take it.” she smiled at you as you both continued down the isles, you found a book you’ve had on your list and you picked it up to purchase. ellie and you came across the comic book section and she practically squealed in excitement as she held up a comic that read savage starlight. it was crazy seeing this badass boxer geeking out over comic books, space snd dinosaurs. you never would have thought it but it just makes you like her more.

“oh fuck yeah! i don’t have this one! this is my favorite series ever.” ellie told you smiling.

you guys made your way up to the counter and placed down the book and comic. ellie reached to hit the little bell since ash was in the back still. she made her way out of the back and her face lit up again when she saw you guys.

“hi ladies! is this all?” she spoke as she picked up the merchandise and clicked the price in her outdated sale system.

you opened your bag and grabbed your wallet. ellie tried to beat you to pulling out hers but you put her hand over hers and pushed it down, giving her a smile.

then you pulled out a 20 and handed it over. ash smiled as she finished the transaction, gave you the change and told you thank you.

“id actually like to take you up on the job offer, this place seems so cool!” you responded.

“oh yes! it would be a great help! you can come back on wednesday around 11 for your first shift! we’ll sort paperwork and stuff out then! thank you so much again!” the little lady said across the counter as she handed you your paper bag with ellies comic and your book.

“sounds perfect! i will see you then!” you said.

ellie said goodbye to her and she came around the counter to give you both a hug before you headed out of the store and continued the walk to the cafe.

“well it looks like im employed now, this is exciting” you said as you grabbed ellies hands in yours.

“it looks as so sweetheart, im excited for you!” she said as she squeezed her hand in yours, “now lets eat? and this time i’m paying, to celebrate!”

she then turned you around with a spin to see the cafe to the side of you. it was a cute retro diner that looked like it was straight out of the 90s. how does ellie know the best places? she’s unbelievable, you thought in your head, not being able to stop the smile growing on your face as you looked at her with your mouth dropped open in disbelief.

ellie laughed as she held the door for you as you both walked in and saw a seat yourself sign. you leaded the way across the checker print floor to the last booth in the corner of the right side of the diner, right next to the window.

ellie followed behind you and watched as you picked that booth. the red booth her and joel used to sit at every single they came here. the booth she spent years sitting at with the man who was gone forever. ellie felt her chest tighten as you took the side she always sat in, leaving ellie the spot that held so many images of her late father. she couldn’t blame you, its not like you were aware of the memories this particular booth held. but ellie couldn’t help that it hurt.

you noticed a sudden change in ellie when she didn’t respond to you as you asked if she had any idea what she wanted as you guys slid into the booth across each other.

“hey el?” you tried to get her attention but she was off in her own head.

you reached over and held her hand which is stopped her fidgeting with the other and she finally looked up at you.

“ellie are you okay?”

“yeah sweetheart… this is just- this booth holds a lot of memories.” she spoke to you with a hint of sadness behind what she said, “haven’t sat here since my dad died.”

“els, fuck, im sorry should we move over there-“

she has a habit of cutting off your rambling with a squeeze of your hand and saying to you, “hey no it’s okay, it’s nice to sit here again, it’s been so long but i’m glad you’re here with.”

you made sure ellie was okay with staying before you guys took a look at the menu when the waitress came around and introduced herself, telling you her name and she started you and ellie off with a round of hot coffee while you guys looked over the breakfast section.

“okay ellie… i have a serious question.” she looked up from the menu and made direct eye contact with you before you proceeded talking with the most serious look on your face, “waffles or pancakes?”

“not the biggest fan of pancakes, definitely fuck with waffles more,” ellie laughed but the sadness couldn’t help but show up again as she thought about joel again. he didn’t really like pancakes either. ellie thought about the last time her and joel were here, a couple days before he passed. she wished she remembered more of him.

interrupting her thoughts, the waitress came back for your order which for you was waffles with scambled eggs and bacon and ellie got the same thing as you too.

you talked about how nice it was to see parts of the town you didn’t even know existed and that you and ellie got to explore it together, you told her “thank you for bringing you to places that were special to her.”

ellie beamed, “im glad i got to show you sweetheart.”

about 10 minutes later, the waitress brought over your plates and you guys started to dig in to the so needed breakfast. you watched as ellie drowned her food enough that syrup was over her entire plate, laughing as you told her “theres not even any food left at this point, its allllll syrup.”

“hey leave me alone! this is the best part!” she said as she cut a bit and brought it to her mouth as the syrup dripping down her chip. you watched as she licked her lips as she swallowed looking you dead in the eye. all you could think about was kissing her again. the way her lips felt on yours, how her hands covered your body and the goosebumps she left. ellie noticed your eyes change as you thought about it and didn’t speak.

“whatcha thinking ‘bout sweetheart?” ellie finally asked with an innocent smile on her face but she was feeling the same way you did, she couldn’t help the thoughts of last night, staying wrapped around your warm body, the way your lips connected with hers and how you begged for her to kiss you again. she only wonders what would have happened if you guys didn’t stop.

“how good this fo- food tastes el duh,” you stuttered. ellie laughed and mumbled a “sureeee.”

you guys finished your food up and continued drinking the coffee that was refilled a couple minutes ago before you asked for the check. the waitress sat down the receipt and ellie slammed her hand down on to of it before you could snatch it up and treat her again.

“what did i tell you? tsk tsk tsk” she made the noise with her mouth, “i’m getting breakfast,” she said as she pulled her wallet from her back pocket and sat cash on the table. “done with the coffee sweetheart?” as soon as she asked you took your final sip before adding it to the table of empty dishes you piled up for the waitress to make it a little easier for her.

“now i am.” you gave her a smile. she returned it and stood up throwing her backpack over her shoulder, before holding out her hand for you to hold. you gripped her hand as she gently pulled you out of the booth and let you walk first. you walked the diner to the front door before you opened it before the both of you.

as you stepped out of the diner, you wondered if this was a date? you knew it wasn’t said but this would be a great first date if it was. bookshop and a diner with ellie. you’ve never just been out before like this.

in your last relationship, the one that sent you running from new york, you never left the house, she wouldn’t let you. you couldn’t go out with your friends, leading them to stop talking to you because “it was pointless” in being your friend anymore. it hurt but you couldn’t escape it, you knew it was bad being shut in like that but you didn’t want to face your ex girlfriend.

you spent 2 years in that abusive relationship and couldn’t be more happy to get away but the thought of her finding you was always a thought that never left the back of your head. when you threatened to leave before, she told you she’d always find you and that you would never be able to get away from her. you wonder if you ran far enough away from her. hopefully half a country away was enough.

as you both stood out on the sidewalk trying to figure out what your next plans were since it was only about 3pm, ellie asked if you wanted to head to her apartment. you told her yes and you started the walk back down the street you came. hand in hand, the bookstore came in view on the corner and you knew you were close. she brought you down the connecting street to the building next door to a green door with chipped paint. she pulled her keys from her front pocket and unlocked the door.

inside was a stairway to the second floor and a door at the other opposite side of the front door. it was nice entrance with a door mat and a nice table against the wall with some fake flowers and some little decorations.

“ash lives downstairs actually, this is all hers.” ellie told you as she saw you looking the trinkets.

“aw that’s so nice,” you said as she lead you up the stairs to a another green door. ellie unlocked her front door and she held it for you to walk inside. she flicked on the light as she pulled the door shut and locked it. you were taken back at how nice her apartment was. you stepped more into her apartment and took a deep look around.

she had a wall of vinyls next to a record player and stereo system and 2 guitars, one electric and another dark wood acoustic with a moth on the neck. she had a couple plants in her window and a few on the fireplace in the middle of the open living room, connected to her a bit outdated kitchen (but it added to the ambiance) she had a playstation connected to her large tv screen across from a long grey couch. the door to the bathroom was open so you can only assume the one that’s shut across the room is her bedroom. band posters littered her walls and picture frames sat around her living room. a bookshelf full of comic books and action figures along with a series of books on space.

she walked over to the couch and dropped her bag as you followed her and took a seat on the couch. it was so comfy, it was unbelievable. she grabbed the remote and handed it to you telling you to turn on whatever. you did as you watched from the side as ellie emptied the contents of her book bag which consisted of her jar of weed, her rainbow grinder and a pack of papers.

“hm sweetheart?”, ellie said getting your attention, “m gonna take a shower, mind rolling one for when im done?” she smiled at you.

“yeah sure els!” you said as you picked up the pack of papers. she smiled and walked into her bedroom. you heard the shower turn on you finished prepping a couple papers. you packed the grinder, then started stuffing each one them, licking them shut and placing them back on the table. once you finished, you were watching community as yours eyes darted around ellie’s living room and landed on a picture of her with dina and your brother.

you got up from the couch and walked over and picked it up, examining it. they almost look young in the photograph, you wonder what it would have been like if you were here with them at that time instead of now. how life would have been if you weren’t stuck in new york with her. you placed it back down on the table when another frame caught your eye. you made your way over to the bar area it sat on and held it in your hand.

this must be ellie and her dad.

it was a picture of them in a stable feeding a horse, she had to have been like only fifteen in the photo. “she was so cute,” you thought. you stared at the man who you assume was her dad. he had darker but greying hair, he seemed so young in the picture but it was only taken a couple years ago.

you jumped as you heard ellie speak behind you. you didn’t even hear the water turn off. “joel, that was his name.” she said, you turned around to see her standing right behind you, “our relationship was complicated but he was a good man, taught me most of what i know,” she took the frame from your hands and held it in her own, looking down at it, “but i miss him… you know i planned to ask him to watch a movie that night on the day he passed… but it never happened.” ellie said as her thumb brushed over him in the photo.

you held one of ellies hand over the photo and you gave her a small smile, “i wish i would have met him, he seems like he was a great dad els, i know he’d be proud of you.” she looked to meet your eyes, “thank you sweetheart… really thank you.” she smiles as she puts the picture back down. as soon as it was out of her hands, you couldn’t help but wrap your arms around her and squeeze. she returned your hug instantly and rested her chin on your shoulder and her hands made their way to your hips.

“aw sweetheart what was that for?” ellie joked as she pulled her face away but kept her hands on your waist. you swear you skin burned every time she touched you.

“els cmon,” you rolled your eyes jokingly at her, “you know why, now are you ready to smoke?” you wiggled your eyebrows at her and she moved you guys towards the couch.

you both got comfy as ellie lit up a joint and you switched on the movie stepbrothers. you got comfy when ellie grabbed a big blanket from a basket next to her couch and she put it over both of you, you scooted closer to her, putting her arm over the back of the couch behind your neck and you cuddled close to her chest, breathing in the wonderful scent of her. as you started the movie, ellie leaned forward grabbing a joint off the table, putting in her mouth and lit it with her free hand.

she took a big hit and blew the smoke out. you watched her as she took her next hit. ellie realized you were watching her and couldn’t help but smile. “you know its rude to stare sweetheart?” she spoke as she took her last hit and held it out to pass to you.

“oops!,” you shook your head and grinned towards her, grabbing the joint as you looked at ellie’s tattooed arm, then back up at her face. the freckles that painted her cheeks and could help yourself as the words left your mouth, “you’re so beautiful els sorry can’t help it.”

you saw the blush creep up on her cheeks as she told you, “so are you sweetheart.”

eventually you guys finished the movie and ellie picked the next one, superbad, one of her favorites she told you, but you guys paused before you started it. ellie stood up and went to the kitchen on the other side of the living room. she looked through the cabinets until she pulled out a bag of doritos and some sprite in a can back to the coffee table for you to snack on during the movie.

when she sat, ellie lit up another a joint and you and her got comfy on the couch as you hit play on your next movie. smoking and laughing over the film, you and ellie got caught up in talking. it felt like you’d known each other for years, the way the conversation flowed and the way you guys connected. you could talk about anything for hours and you know you’d never get bored.

cue to the movie credits and the bag of chips is empty and the soda is drank up, you were laying on ellie’s couch, your legs spread over the top of her lap as she sat up, her hand rubbed up and down your leg under the blanket you were sharing. it was calming but still sent butterflies through your whole body everytime her long fingers made another pass up and down.

your eyes fixated on ellie as she picked up the remote and started looking for something else to watch. she scrolled through a bit before she turned to ask what you were thinking you guys should watch, catching you staring at her yet again. you were nervous to speak but what you wanted to ask her had to be said.

“when i’m with you i don’t feel so… alone.” you admitted to her, “i really like you els, i’ve never felt this way about anyone, i mean there was just one time i thought i did, but it wasn’t like this… this is different.” you paused, looking at her, her face was soft as she listened to you admit this and you can see the grin growing on her face as you finished speaking, “and i know we haven’t known each other long but the last thing i expected when i moved here was to met someone as great as you. i want this els… if you do to of course.” as soon as she knew you were done speaking, it happened so fast.

ellie’s lips connected with yours. she leaned over you as her free hand reached up to your left side of face to pull you closer to her, her other hand had moved from your leg to your thigh now. chills ran down your body as your lips moved with hers slowly but filled with urgency. your hand moved to the back of ellie’s neck, your fingers tangled in her hair and she couldn’t help the moan that escape from her mouth. you took that to to your advantage and introduced your tongue into the already deep kiss. “oh sweetheart,” she mumbled against your lips before copying your actions before she moved on top of you faster than you could blink.

ellie could feel your heart start beating faster as one of her legs slid between both of yours. your lips were warm against hers, the way your fingers stayed gripped in her hair as you pulled on it when the kiss grew sloppy but it was still passionate as ever. ellie needed you, in every possible. she wanted to feel your lips all over her, she loved the way your body molded to hers as she was on top of you, how you fit perfectly under her. how you moaned so low and that it made her body ache for more of you.

ellie couldn’t help but break apart the kiss as she got overwhelmed by her thoughts and had to catch her breath. as much as she wanted to keep kissing you like the world was ending, she didn’t want to rush this yet, yes she can’t wait for it to happen but it was worth the wait, she knew it would be worth it. foreams holding her up, ellie’s forehead rested against yours as she opened her eyes to see you, underneath her, practically panting with your eyes still shut as you caught your breath too.

ellie couldn’t help but lift her head off yours and stare at you while you laid under her like this. your hair was sprawled out messily against the pillow your head was resting on, your shirt was twisted around your body, and your lips were slightly pink and swollen. she could get used to this, ellie thought in her head, seeing you look this gorgeous in a position like this.

you opened your eyes to see ellie staring at you and smiled towards you as she started speaking, “i want you sweetheart.” she said, “i want this to happen, so badly.” she stopped as she pulled her hands up to your face again, hands on either cheek as she brought her head down to kiss you softly, “‘m gonna take you out on a real date sweetheart, ‘m gonna show you how much i want all this, all of you.” she said giving you another kiss, this one lasted a few seconds longer.

“els, i want you too.” you spoke as you placed a kiss on the lips of the the girl who’s on top of you right now. when you pulled back, ellie couldn’t help but place another peck on your lips before she sat up, moving from laying between your legs, but she did move them right back on her lap, sitting closer to you now. you smiled at her as she grabbed your hands with hers, rubbing them with her thumb over the backside as she started talking.

“i feel less alone when i’m with you too,” she took a deep breath before continuing, “‘m gonna get serious for a second if that’s okay?” she questioned looking up at you, you gave her a nod with a smile on your face, before she looked back down at your hands in hers, “joel… when he passed, we were finally starting to build a relationship again. we weren’t very close before he died, dumb shit happened and i just couldn’t forgive him… and as soon as i did, he was gone … it wrecked me- fuck ‘m sorry- its still wrecking me- he taught me so much, he showed me so much… the only time i’m not thinking about him is when i’m with you sweetheart. i hate talking about him, i feel like once i start im not gonna be able to stop but- i just- i need you to know that i’m trying… because you make me want to enjoy my life again.” you hung on everything she spoke, watching the words fall from her lips as she played with your fingers in her hand, a habit you notice she does to her own hands when she’s nervous.

“ellie, you’re not alone in this, i’m sorry you never fully got the closure you needed, you do not ever say you’re sorry for opening up about how you’re feeling, i’m listening if you ever do want to talk about it.. no pressure els but i think it helps to open up to someone and get some things off your chest. im always here for you ellie. i’m still wrecked about some things myself so just know there’s never any jugdgement from me,” you squeezed her hands in yours, showing her you were serious about what you were saying. she lifted her head to look at you, “you make me happy els, i didn’t think i’d get to experience this again…” you paused nervously before she gave your hands a gentle squeeze, showing you that she’s listening and giving you the courage to tell her what happened.

“back in new york, i was in a relationship with this girl. i lived there for about 4 years and we met during my second year of college through a mutual friend… it was great at first, ya know? we connected so fast that within a couple months of being together she ended up moving in with me, that was the first mistake,” you laughed to yourself before continuing, “once we lived in the same place, it made it so much easier for her to control me… she wouldn’t let me leave the house unless it was for work, i couldn’t see my friends, she came home drunk and angry all the time and always accused me of things i would never do, she’s the reason i had to drop out of college while she stayed enrolled and became a lawyer… ” you took a deep breath trying to contain your emotions, you didn’t like talking about this, you didn’t want ellie to see you as a victim. you were so much stronger than even you thought and you hoped she saw that side of you before the other one.

“she made me feel horrible and insecure, …she was extremely manipulative, also i knew she was sleeping with someone else too, i saw messages from her coworker and they were more than slightly suggestive,” you chuckled, almost losing your train of thought as you caught and held your focus to ellie’s hand touching yours comfortingly. “the first time she hit me… it could have been worse, that sounds bad but i don’t know. by the last time she hit me, i dreamed it was the first time again so that it wouldn’t hurt that much.” you could feel the tears well in your eyes.

“the day after when she left for work, i packed as much of my stuff as i could into my car and just left. i didn’t leave a note, i changed my phone number and deleted my social media. it was the best decision i ever made. i don’t know if this was too much to share but i wanted you to know that you aren’t alone in not being okay els, we got this.” you gave her hand a final squeeze as you waited for her to respond.

it took her a minute to process everything you said again before she spoke up, “oh sweetheart… ‘m so sorry that happened to you.” she said disconnecting her hands from yours to move them to hold both sides of your face, looking straight into your eyes, “you’re the most beautiful girl i have ever seen, i’m sorry that she made you feel like that, you don’t deserve any bit of that, wish i knew you back then so all of that never would have happened to you but i promise sweetheart, you will be safe with me. you will always be safe.”

lmk if you want to be added to the taglist :) thank u sm for the support!!!!

@lookforthelight1 @ucannotcompare @diddiqueen @mikellie @vvitchesh3x @benthoee @bready101 @all-things-0dd @bunlikean-angel @mulan-but-gay @lovejuliettq

#the last of us #ellie williams #ellie williams fanfiction #ellie williams smut #ellie williams x reader #tlou series #tlou game #ellie tlou #tlou2 #ellie williams fic #ellie williams fluff #ellie x fem reader #ellie x reader #ellie the last of us

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mariclerc · 22 days

Text

An unexpected role (pt.4) | cl16

Summary: you revealed your little secret to your date, you didn't expect he would take it so well.

Warning: bad comments on social media, unnamed ex-partner, abusive ex-partner, swearing, a LOT of fluff and Charles being an amazing dad and boyfriend.

a/n: this one is a little bit long, I hope you like ittt!!

Check out the series!! Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

taglist 🎀 @martaaairwin1994-blog @barcelonaloverf1life @bananaleclerc @thedecalcomania-blog @jonasswifie

ynusername

liked by lissiemackintosh, arthur_leclerc, kellypiquet and others

tagged charles_leclerc

ynusername my loves 🤍🤍

user1 NO WAY ‼️‼️‼️

itslolasss you finally posted them bestie 🥹🥹 i'm supa proud

charles_leclerc it cost her a couple of tears but i'm finally on her insta 😌😌

ynusername itslolasss please don't believe him okay? But yes, I may have cried a little while posting this 😭😭

itslolasss i know you did darling don't worry abt that 🫶🏻🫶🏻

charles_leclerc I love you and Lily with all my heart 💗💗 my cute girls

ynusername charlieeee 😭😭 you're making me cry babe 🥺🥺

charles_leclerc owww, don't cry little dove 🥺🥺

landonorris i missed several chapters charles_leclerc can you explain????

pierregasly i also missed several chapters bro

landonorris wait you didn't know this?? then who knew?

logansargeant when did this happen? i'm lost

carlossainz55 same here

user2 not half of the grid not knowing that Charles had a family 🫣🫣🫣

scuderiaferrari we didn't know either 🧍🏼‍♀️

user1 TEAM 😳😳😳😳

francisca.cgomes cutiesss 💕💕💕 i love you bothhh

ynusername kikaaa Lily misses youuuuu 🫶🏻🫶🏻

charles_leclerc

liked by lewishamilton, jeanalesi, alex_albon and others

tagged ynusername

charles_leclerc my whole lifeeee, I love them both 💗🎀✨

lorenzotl finallyyyyyyyyyy

user1 oh my god, they're so pretty 🥺 congratulations charlie for your little family

ynusername we love youuuuu so much charliee 🥹😭 thank you for appearing at the perfect time in our lives, we owe you a lot 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻

charles_leclerc it's nothing amore, the one who owes you two a lot is actually me 🥹🥹

ynusername okay charlie boo boo! 🥺🥺

leclerc_pascale mes filles, je les aime beaucoup 💗💗 (my daughters, I love you both very much)

ynusername nous t'aimons aussi maman!! (we love you too mom!!)

charles_leclerc bien sûr, tu ne m'aimes plus... mens, je plaisante maman 🤍🤍 (of course you don't love me anymore... lie, I'm joking mom)

scuderiaferrari welcome to the red team Lily and yn!!! ❤️❤️❤️

liked by creator and ynusername

lilymhe oh goodness congrats big guy! And welcome to the f1 paddock cute girlies 💕💕

ynusername oh god, thank u sweetheart 🫶🏻🫶🏻

sebastianvettel congrats Charles ❤️❤️

charles_leclerc thank you so much Seb!!

sebastianvettel if you need some parenting guide you can ask me anything!

charles_leclerc noted!! Thank you so much Seb <3

user3 oh god, congrats champ!!!!

f1gossipp are we seriously going to congratulate him just because he is raising a little girl and his dating a pig?

user2 bro... Let him live!!! He has a beautiful and adorable family and I think that from comments like yours on social media he had them safe and sound!!

f1gossipp yeah sure, she looks like a fucking golddigger

user4 yeah, she looks like a total bitch. Attracting a man using a little girl as bait? Please, everything to get attention because she needs it

francisca.cgomes can you please shut the fuck up??? this is why Charles didn't want to show little Lily or yn and he did it because he is proud of them and loves them with his whole heart!! it's one thing for you to support him and another thing for him to throw shit at the people he loves.

Your cell phone doesn't stop vibrating with notifications, since last night you decided (as a family) to post pictures of yourselves on insta and, as expected, some fans went completely crazy, but too crazy in your opinion. There were many good comments, and you really appreciated them, as there were also very, very bad and ugly comments talking about you and Lily and what hurts you the most is that it's not your or her fault.

Right now you are lying in bed next to Charles, he has one arm on your waist and you are lying on his chest, even though your head hasn't stopped spinning thousands of times, the beat of his heart calms you incredibly and you really loved that.

Suddenly you hear the bedroom door open and small footsteps echo in the silent room.

“Mama? Up! Up!” Lily says from the foot of the bed, trying to climb up.

“Oh, come here darling!” You say while you move a little without waking Charles so you can put Lily on the bed next to you.

She smiles. “Dada?” she asked.

“Dada is sleeping baby, but we can sleep with him too, don't you think?” you said to her softly, she nodded.

She moved onto your other side and you covered her with the blanket you and Charles were using. She snuggled up next to you while you tried to fall asleep even just a little. These quiet moments are what fill you with calm and make you have hope that not everything is bad, you have a nice family, a healthy and happy little girl, a wonderful boyfriend who would go to the moon for you two and there's not much more you can ask for. This is everything you ever dreamed of having.

Suddenly Charles babbles something a little sleepy. “Mhm, good morning princesses!” He says and you let out a giggle.

“Good morning champ!” you say as you give him a kiss on the cheek.

“Dada! Mowning!” Lily says making hands so that her dad can hold her in his arms.

“Oh, but what a nice good morning I have here! Ma petite fleur and ma belle” He says as he brushes his nose against Lily's and smiles. (my little flower. my beautiful.)

“Yes, especially with online comments.” You say releasing a sigh.

He looks at you curious. “What kind of comments, my dear? Don't tell me you read those comments?”

You nodded. “Sadly yes, it's just that... I couldn't help it, sorry love.”

He denied. “You shouldn't apologize to me love, they are the wrong ones! They don't know you and they don't know Lily to have an opinion about you or our little family.” He looked at you and smiled and then kissed you on the corners of your lips. “So you don't have to apologize to me, okay? I love you two very much and I hope you know it, honey.” He says as he starts giving you kisses on your face, Lily starts bouncing in his arms and you laugh.

You nod with a shy smile on your face. “Okay sir, I won't apologize to you but it does bother me that they are that way, you know?”

“I know love, but don't waste your energy on that, there are more important things than that. Like, for example, Lily!” He says smiling at the aforementioned and she giggles. “Look at her, isn't she cute? Because yes she is, a cutie!”

You giggle. “Fine, fine. How about we get up and start this day properly, okay? What would you like for breakfast, my loves?”

“Pancakes!” They both say in unison, you smile and get out of bed.

***

The rest of the day passed peacefully, and you were truly grateful. You liked being in this little bubble of love and comfort building colourful block towers with Lily and Charles, but sometimes it was necessary to show a little bit of that love that you have as a family to the world, and perhaps many people are bothered by that, but at the same time there are many who don't.

But seeing the smile on your baby girl face every time her dada tickles her or hugs her is priceless and it makes you think that you are really in the right place.

“Love? What are you thinking about honeybunch?” he asked softly while holding Lily in his arms.

“Nothing, I'm just so happy to be with you. It sounds silly, but you guys make me so so happy.”

He smiled. “Aww, love. That is so cute! I am also very happy to be with you two!”

Lily, feeling the love, begins to giggle a few times. “Mama! Dada! Love!”

You giggle. “We love you too baby!” you say in unison.

You more than anyone know that with the photos being posted on Insta, your parents are going to want to try to get back into your life. And it really doesn't make any sense since they turned their back on you many times and now they want to come back to see how much money they can "get" from you or Charles is very stupid.

“Do you know what terrifies me? That my parents, seeing the photos of us on social media, want to come back into my life, you know? After everything they did to me...” You were going to continue but he silenced you with a kiss on the lips.

“Princess, don't think about that. Yes, they most likely want to get back into your life and Lily's, but you know what? It's up to you to make them come in or not.” he whispers.

“Who are you and what did you do with my Charles? I didn't know this philosophical Charles.” he laughs.

“Sometimes I have to use logic honey, I'm not just a pretty driver.” you let out a laugh while he winks. “But honestly baby, don't think about that... How about we watch a movie together?”

Suddenly, almost automatically, Lily smiled. “Movie! Can we 'atch... Princess movies?” she asked softly.

Charles smiled and caressed her hair. “But of course honey! We can watch any princess movie you want!”

You smiled and got up from the floor. “Okay, I'll look for a blanket and I'll look for Mimi too!”

“Mimi!” Lily screeched and you giggled.

“Okay okay, you two stay there.” You say as you walk towards Lily's room to look for her stuffed bunny Mimi. “What movie will we see, loves?” You ask from the hallway.

“Tangled!” They say in unison, you just laugh while grabbing the blanket, that's yours and Lily's favorite movie and little by little it has become Charles' favorite —although he was a little reluctant to watch princess movies but he loves them.

You return to the living room where Lily and Charles are already settled on the sofa with some sweets and a small glass of water for Lily. “Tangled it is then!” You say as you hand Mimi to Lily while she snuggles between the two of you and the three of you shelter under the blanket.

ynusername posted a story

itslolasss god, what a beautiful thing, you three will make me cry I sweaaaarr 😭😭😭

ynusername stfu, right now i feel like i'm in a fever dream you know? Not counting the bad comments on insta.

itslolasss girl I love you and I love your little girl, but please don't hurt yourself by reading all that garbage :( they have no idea what a great mother you are‼️‼️

itslolasss i bet all my money that Charles already gave you a lecture about not seeing those disgusting comments 🫵🏻🫵🏻

ynusername erm... Yes 👉🏻👈🏻 and I say, he's truly right tbh

itslolasss can we talk about the fact that you made him watch TANGLED? He's such a girl dad bestie

ynusername hehe, yup lily and i did that thing 😋🥰

“You know something baby?” You move your head to the side so you can see Charles blushing a little bit. “We have our own fairy tale here.” he whispered.

You giggle while caressing lily's back, she fell asleep in your arms. “Are you sure about that?”

He nodded. “Yup! We have our own little bubble of love here, a sleepy little princess, and I have you.” he gives you a small peck on your lips. “There may be some... little problems along the way of course, but I don't think that will be an impediment for us.” he smiled at you.

“Aww, babe. That's so sweet!” you blush slightly at his cute words. “I know that not everything is rosy and there will be some problems, but I don't think it is impossible for us.”

He smiles and kisses you on the lips, it was a slow and sweet kiss, after a little while you separated to catch your breath. “As long as I am with you both nothing bad would happen to you, okay?” He said and you just nodded with a smile on your face, really with him both you and Lily felt protected.

***

A couple of weeks have passed since that night, and the truth is that everything is going quite well, no one hates you and Lily on social media anymore, apparently they managed to understand that you are a family... And by "understand" you mean that Charles posted an extremely long post on Instagram to make it clear that if people (or the "fans") hate his family will have to deal with him.

“Calm down little butterfly, I've finished combing your hair, okay?” you say tenderly to Lily as she plays with Mimi.

“Okay mama.” she giggled softly.

You finish fixing her hair when there is a knock on the door, you are not waiting for anyone, Charles had gone out to buy some groceries but other than that you weren't waiting for someone else. So very cautiously, you walk towards the door and look through the peephole to see who it is.

“What... What he does... here?” You whisper to yourself, on the other side of the door is your ex-partner.

You feel your body start to shake, this can't be happening! How did he manage to find out where you live? You're honestly terrified to think that he might take Lily, but to be honest, coming back after almost three years of abandoning you both when you were pregnant it's pretty stupid and dumb.

With trembling hands you manage to write a quick message to Charles which, surprisingly, he read immediately and replied with “I'm on my way bubba. Don't worry everything will be fine <3” You let out a sigh and very carefully looked through the peephole again, he is still standing there with a face that is not at all pleasant.

With a heavy sigh you slightly opened the door. “What are you doing here?”

He smiled coquettishly. “I thought about paying my girls a visit.”

You cleared your throat. “Oh really? After almost three years, really? Besides we were never "your girls", so if you can go away I would be very grateful” You say with a coarse, serious and annoying voice.

He sighs heavily. “Do you have another man?” He says with anger. “Answer me, bitch.”

You roll your eyes. “So what if I have it or not? It's not your fucking problem!” You say exasperated.

He looks at you again with anger and hatred. “You are with that fucking little driver? Oh really? You are such a little whore, looking for new sticks to insert in your holes.”

“Please, stop now, please.” you whisper, begging him to leave you alone. “Stop this please.”

He didn't listen to you and slapped you in the face, the raw sound echoed in the hallway of the building, you were perplexed in your place with your red eyes full of tears. This was common when you were together? Yes, sadly it was, but you couldn't do anything, you were too young and, according to your parents, he was the "right man" for you... What a crap.

“Mama?” You heard Lily's soft voice and before your ex could hit you again you took her into your arms.

You looked at Lily with a somewhat sad face. “It's okay cutie pie, mama is here.” you whisper.

He looked at you both like you were fresh meat. “Is that Lily? Come to daddy sweetheart.” It's ironic how one moment he was hitting you and now he wants to play house with you and Lily, totally abnormal.

Lily looked at your ex and started whining. “You not ma' dada.” Lily said in a stammer.

“I know darling, dada is going to be here soon, I promise.” you whispered again.

He frowned and became angry again. “So, you're really with that little driver, huh? Oh little bitch, you'll see.” He said with his voice full of rage and egocentrism.

You closed your eyes and covered Lily as you waited for the impact of, perhaps, another slap or perhaps something worse, but that impact never came. Half open your eyes to watch as Charles held your ex's wrist with one hand and grabbed the door frame with the other.

“Listen, I don't know who the fuck you are but I'll just say one thing and I hope it's clear to you.” Charles said with a strong voice, you had never seen him so angry, well, only a couple of times when he got angry with his track engineer, but nothing more than that. “You come to touch a measly inch of my wife and daughter and I swear to you that you won't have an easy time finding a job or even a partner later on, is that clear?” he said rudely.

“You're just a fucking driver, what are you going to do to me? Run over me?” Your ex said.

Charles laughed sarcastically and without grace. “Please, I am capable of making your life miserable.” he smiled sinisterly. “Now if you allow me, could you get out of here? I want to spend time with my wife and daughter, and if that bothers you and you want to cause another stupid scene, I can call security.” he said in a serious voice.

As if it were a warning, the building security appeared and took your ex-partner away from your apartment door, you let out a sigh of relief and hug Charles with Lily in your arms and he hugs you back. You let out the suppressed tears in your eyes, it has been so long since you felt so much fear and terror and the fact that Lily has been present terrifies you even more, he begins to rub your and Lily's back very carefully.

“He's gone baby, let it out, there's no pressure.” Charles said in a whisper as you entered the apartment again.

You let out a little whimper. “I don't know what... I don't know what he was doing here, how he found us... I was very scared.” He caressed your face a little and then separated and looked for the bag with the groceries that he left in the hallway. “I don't what he wanted Cha... I'm... I'm sorry” you whisper he wiped your tears with his thumb.

“Baby... You don't have to apologize for his shitty attitude, the important thing is that I arrived on time, don't you think? And besides, you and Lily are safe, which is the most important thing.” he said. “Although, I can help you place a restraining order against him, if you wish.”

You blinked a few times. “Really? Charlie, it's not necessary, you know?” he shook his head multiple times.

“Love, you have to do it. It's for your safety and Lily's! I wouldn't mind talking to my lawyers about it and getting help from them.” He said in a calm voice as he carried a calm Lily in his arms.

“You're sure?” I looked at him hopefully.

He nods. “Completely sure, darling.”

You nod with a shy smile on your face. “Okay babe.”

He kisses your temple. “Now, how about we cure that ugly mark on your face? And then we can have a cuddle session for my favorite girls, how does that sound?” He says while tickling Lily's tummy, you nod.

“That sounds good." You smile a little. “Thanks again love.” you said and he kisses you softly.

He guides you to the room and heals the minor wounds left by your ex's slap. His touch is gentle and soft, it's like he doesn't want to hurt you and that's good for your soul. Finally, he placed one of Lily's bandages on your cheek and kissed the spot, causing you to giggle.

“Your stuble tickles me love!” you say and he smiles and blushes.

“And why isn't Lily tickled, hm?” He says with a little smile and starts giving Lily kisses and she giggles loudly.

“Dadaa! Tickles!” she says between giggles.

You smiled. “What did you say, honey?”

“Fine, fine. Maybe you have a bunch of tickles!” he says with a chuckle. “My ticklish girls.” He says and tickles you and Lily again and you both laugh louder.

***

After a few hours, sleep overcame Lily and you were just a push away from falling asleep, the fatigue of the unexpected day was hitting you hard. But you couldn't go to sleep without first talking to Charles a little, it was a kind of routine that you do before going to sleep.

You murmur. “Mhm, baby?” you asked.

“Can't you sleep my darling?” He asks and you nod. “Come here petit bébé.” He says as he opens his arms. (little baby)

You snuggle into his arms. “I don't know how to thank you for what you do for us.” You whisper.

“Baby, you don't have to thank me for that, you know?” He says softly. “It's something that comes naturally from me, it's nothing really.” He says while placing kisses all over your face and you giggle.

“you are an angel charlie.” You smile.

“I don't see myself as an angel, but if you say so, that's fine!” He giggles and blushes.

You make a little silence and then speak again. “So... My wife, you said earlier, tell me, sir, what do you mean by that?” You giggle a little.

He blushes even more. “Oh well, I don't know, it just came out... I'm sorry if it makes you uncomfortable darling.” He said a little embarrassed and you silenced him with a short kiss on the lips.

“Not at all... I have to say that I liked it.” You whisper and he opened his eyes wide.

“Doesn't it make you uncomfortable?” you denied.

“You can call me that as many times as you want bubba!” you giggled.

“Oh god, thank you so much chérie, you make me the luckiest man in the world!” he giggled.

“It's nothing baby boy! It's like you say, it's something that comes naturally.” You say and give him several kisses.

With him you feel safe and loved, a feeling that you haven't had for a long time (since before you finally knew him). And so in the warm arms of your loved one, you fall into a deep sleep thinking that not everything is bad, there are good moments as well as bad ones, but with him and Lily there is nothing they cannot overcome as a family.

#formula one x reader #f1 x you #charles leclerc fluff #charles leclerc imagine #charles leclerc x reader #charles x reader #charles x mom #charles leclerc #dad!charles leclerc #charles leclerc x mom #charles x you

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thesirencult · 5 months

Text

PAC: HOW YOU'LL GET 💵 WEALTHY

PILE 1 🤎

The Hermit

My Pile 1 💕 welcome to your reading.

The path to wealth for you starts first and foremost through a much needed spiritual seclusion.

You will realize that money = energy through this path of learning how to listen to your inner voice.

You need to tune out other people, only for now. Others do not understand your ideas and can not help you.

After you come out of this period of self searching you will make a great mentor out of yourself and a guiding light. That means that the transformation you went through blessed you with wisdom to guide others, either to make money, lose weight, awaken, search for spiritual truth etc.

A simple 9 to 5 won't get you there.

Possible career paths, skills and talents you can leverage and ideas : any work that helps people transform, self development/coaching industry, therapist, spiritual worker, book writing, ability to listen to others, empathy

PILE 2 🤎

5 Of Wands

Dear Pile 2 ❤️,

Contrary to Pile 1 your path to wealth includes "climbing the ladder".

You are well equipped to start from the bottom of an organization and reach partner/C-Suite status.

You will probably get a prestigious degree as I can tell you are an overachiever. This reminds me of Suits. You will fight through and compete.

You have great arguing abilities (law?) and have the stamina to get to the top.

Now, apart from the above, the 5 Of Wands can show physicality. This is a sign for me that some of you need to watch your health and not run yourself down from all the work you do.

PILE 3 🤎

Knight Of Cups

You are passionate and romantic. Your soul is artistic and you want to create beauty in this world.

This is a singer and songwriter, a chef that creates beautiful dishes that drive people crazy. An amateur photographer who takes photos of hotels in beautiful destinations like a professional. Someone who wants to build a clothing brand.

You are multitalented and an eternal child. Stick to your arts and crafts and harness your beautiful energy and creator abilities and you'll be unstoppable.

P.S. Take the opportunities that come your way, it's never too early to meet with success, contrary to what others tell you. You'll never be fully prepared or ready. You may be a Projector.

PILE 4 🤎

9 Of Wands

Sweet Pile 4 🧁,

You have so many great ideas and the perfect foundation to make 💰. Your mindset is already more than halfway there and you have great abilities.

You need to work on romanticising struggle. It doesn't have to be as hard as you make it. Don't take the stairs if there is an escalator. You don't have to prove anything to anyone.

If right now things are slow, remember how far you've come. Even if it is not visible in the physical, the past few years you've accumulated a wealth of knowledge and are ready to take the next step.

Trust in yourself and the Universe. Preserve, defend your position and work both hard and smart.

A few months ago I stumbled across a video with a woman who was a business coach. She asked successful people "How did you make it?" and their answer was "I never stopped."

Never. Ever. Stop.

Source : The Siren Cult

#astrology #tarot reading #tarot #pick a card #pick a pile #pac reading #pick a photo #pick a picture #level up journey #soulmate #thesirencult #source:thesirencult

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zuhaism · 11 months

Text

⊹ ｡˚ 𓂃 ♡ MMTG ?! ┊ lesserafim ⁺

[ navigation | corso ]

you and the members were in hybe’s lobby. you were sitting between chaewon and jaejae for the interview. many laughs were exchanged here and there as jaejae interviewed each members.

“when do you use it?” asked jae jae when the topic came to slangs. “for example ‘what are we going to eat for dinner?’ IDC. with a shoulder tilt” everyone did it together. then yunjin spoke up. “y/n is the only one who never uses slangs.”

“why why why” jae jae was bewildered. “arent you american too?” she had a shocked look on her face. “what ! no i am!” you paused because you were laughing too hard “it’s just that my mom said i shouldn’t talk like that. she says it sounds rude.” you answered with a sheepish smile.

the members nodded in agreement. “y/n’s actually very polite and has great manners, she just doesn’t talk.“ chaewon intervened and gave a thumbs up to the camera. jaejae continued interviewing yunjin.

“y/n! the other american. an all star basketball player! our nations little math nerd” and it showed a picture of 16 year old you about to do a three pointer and you after winning the mathematical olympiad. the interview finally got to you. you closed your eyes in embarrassment. everyone laughed in unison. “wah our y/n looks so cute.” eunchae spoke up.

“i heard you got recruited when you were playing basketball?” jaejae looked at you for confirmation. you chuckled before answering. “yeah actually i got scouted when i was on a school trip…” everyone was silent expecting you to continue but instead you stopped there. “ah” jaejae spoke amongst the silence “ah i guess thats all okay! its alright if you dont want to continue!” everyone bursts out laughing “no no no i can explain! sorry, sorry i thought you wanted to add something.” you tried explaining yourself. after the laughter died down and them teasing you, you started talking again.

you went all the way back to when you were 17. you and your other matheletes teammates won first place in a competition and got to go to Seoul as the winning prize. one night during the trip u got bored and sneaked out the hotel to a basketball court you saw nearby.

while you were shooting three pointers by yourself you noticed someone from the corner of your eye watching you. you got scared and ignored it hoping it wasn’t an entity from another dimension. the person stayed there for far too long and you started getting creeped out even though you were a whole feet taller than them.

you started packing your things up. putting everything in faster when you heard footsteps close behind. you were ready to book it when someone tapped your shoulder. you turned around and was met with a card in your face. the person said nothing as you took it and walked away.

it was a business card. as you examined it you noticed ‘you’re perfect for us. please come and audition tomorrow’

“and then i had a free day the next day so i went.” you ended your story with a small smile as everyone stared at you in awe. “you rapped to corso by tyler the creator am i right.” jaejae spoke up. you looked at her in shock “how’d you know.” she looked to the camera with a smug face and shrugged.

“y/n ! you once went live and answered all the fans math questions.” jaejae suddenly changed the subject as you sat up straighter. the members burst out laughing while you turned red from embarrassment. “wah y/n you’re really good at math aren’t you!” jaejae praised you.

“what. no no” you declined. “no! you’re really good. you just lack confidence.” jaejae ended her sentence and signalled for you all to look at the screen. it was showing a clip of one of your lives where you answered fearnot’s math questions.

“i think the x is 4 but i dont know” you said with your eyebrows furrowed moving closer to the camera to read the comments. “i dont know guys dont listen to me i might be wrong.” you said looking back at your paper, checking your answer again while scratching your head.

“you’re really cute.” said jaejae.

“stop flattering me”

the topic moved on to you being heartless but caring. you never knew you had this title. you never even knew you were caring you just did what you felt right. now that the topic changed everyone was giving examples on how you speak louder through your actions rather than words.

“one time, after coming home from a schedule. i went to my room and slept in the mess i made in the morning because i was too exhausted. the next morning i woke up to a clean room.” sakura started she said after that, she asked who cleaned her room and y/n only shrugged while zuha confirmed it wasn’t her. “it really warmed my heart because we had the same schedule.” sakura ended.

“no unnie it’s because you’re getting older.” eunchae teased the oldest. sakura gave eunchae the stink eye.

“oh! when we arrived at japan it was pouring and y/n unnie was beside me. she took off her jacket and wrapped me in it, holding an umbrella and then we walked together to the car.” eunchae expressed. “and in the car i noticed her shirt was half wet and i was like ‘so this is love’” eunchae announced softly with a dreamy look on her face as she looked at your red face.

“wow y/n you seem like you’d be a good boyfriend” said jaejae while you protested. “you’re right. you’re right sometimes even i want to date her.” chaewon voiced. chaewon started telling about the time after a schedule, when she got out the car her feet was hurting so bad. she was at the back struggling to walk through the pain. she saw you stopping and waiting for her at the parking lot entrance.

when you noticed she was hurting you immediately crouched infront of her. “what?” chaewon asked. you signalled her to piggyback you. “i am not doing that. we’re wearing the same shoes! you’re going to-“ she got cut off when you moved back and carried her anyways. she held onto you tight when you lifted her and she stayed that way until you guys went up to the dorm.

“wah y/n noticing the small things. we need more people like that.” jaejae added. yunjin and kazuha started talking about their loving experiences with you. yunjin stated that she’d only watch a horror movie only if you’re there. yunjin said when you’re with her, she feels safe. probably because whenever there’s a gory scene you’d mutter ‘that’s so fake’ under your breathe. but that’s besides the point. you’d rub circles on her hand and make her feel reassured.

for kazuha, you’re her debate mate. you talk the most when you’re with her. you don’t know how her mind works but you sure know how to handle it. like the other day, she asked which is the strongest : rock, paper, or scissors. you had to explain to her how its neither and rock, paper scissors is just a game of luck.

she also mentioned how you’re always helping her in korean and you’d go for convenience store runs whenever she gets a question right. you treat her so well.

“in conclusion! y/n is a great person to date.” jaejae ended

“not the dating part” chaewon muttered.

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wlntrsldler · 2 months

Text

second installment of fratboy! luke and poseidon!reader. | part 1 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5 (final)

warnings: implied fight/argument between luke and reader; implied sexual actions lol

♫ thought i was playing by gunna, 21 savage, ds4ever

tagged chrisr0driguez, charliebeck, and others.

lukecastell4n: tdx last weekend 🔥

chrisr0driguez: we upppp 😈

charliebeck: pong champ

lukecastell4n: mr. undefeated 💯

clarisselarue: WHY DID I GO HOME LAST WEEKEND

lukecastell4n: told u not to go 🤷🏻‍♂️

silenabeauregard: literally ur dad did not need to assign u a quest he’s sooo wrong for that

charliebeck: maybe we dont talk about the god of war on a public app

poseidonsfavchild: FUUUUCCKKKK ARES 😌 bro got wiped by a 12 year old

bethchase: percy pls 💀

gr0verunderwood: PERCY DELETE

poseidonsfavchild: i dont see my sister in these pictures 🧐

clarisselarue: she went to pike

this comment has been deleted.

lukecastell4n: no she didnt? she said she was too tired to go out

poseidonsfavchild: this is soooo awkward

tdxumm: glad you had a good time brother 🤝 pull up anytime

liked by lukecastell4n and chrisr0driguez.

♫ love me by lil wayne, drake, and future

tagged chrisr0driguez.

lukecastell4n: am to pm

user1: user1bff does this count as a thirst trap

user1bff: absolutely 👀

user2: ksig president gotta be single now if he posting like this

user1: REAAALLL

clarisselarue: oh thats not…

silenabeauregard: ummm

yn_yln: no.

liked by lukecastell4n, clarisselarue, and others.

poseidonsfavchild: do NOT go swimming any time soon

yn_yln: dont be shy, show them ur back 🥰

lukecastell4n: 🫣🤫

poseidonsfavchild: dude ew

clarisselarue: HAHAHAAHHAA

chrisr0driguez: bro looked like he was mauled by a minotaur

♫ best i ever had by drake

tagged yn_yln.

lukecastell4n: since y’all needed a reminder ❤️‍🔥 my 4lifer.

yn_yln: 🥰

clarisselarue: tell em

poseidonsfavchild: YUUUPPPP

chrisr0driguez: you’d think they learned by now 😂

creator limited comments.

#hehe silly post #frances writes #smau #luke castellan #luke castellan x reader #luke castellan imagine #luke castellan pjo #luke castellan fanfic #luke castellan x you #luke pjo #luke castellan x yn #luke castellan x y/n #luke castellan smau #pjo smau #percy jackson smau #percy jackson fanfic #percy jackson #pjo fanfic #pjo series

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flynnriderishot · 3 months

Note

PART 3 WAS SO GOOD IM HOPING THERES A PART FOUR BUT ALSO LIKE NO PRESSURE TAKE YOUR TIME BESTIE ILY

scandals pt.4 - c.s

a/n: thank you so much 😭

warning: i suck at writing out apologies 😬

chris

morning, baby :)

we got some donuts if you want some

matt tried to take your favorite again but i had to fight him off for it

i miss you

you sighed softly as you read the last text.

you hated to admit it, but you missed him too.

while you guys were still technically together, the longest you went without his affection was when he was on tour and even then, nick and matt surprised him with your presence half way through it.

you knew it was wrong to brush him off for as long as you’ve been doing, but your feelings were genuinely hurt.

how could he believe that you would cheat on him? were you efforts to prove how much you truly loved him just ignored?

it’s been two years and he was ready to just give it up like that? without asking you the facts first? it was like he was just waiting for the excuse.

it was heart wrenching to think about.

and you no longer wanted to think about it. you wanted answers, you wanted forgiveness, you wanted to forgive him and move past it.

baby 🩷🩷👩‍❤️‍👨

come over?

chris

really?

give me 10

•••

the excessive knocking on your door was enough for you to know that chris was here.

if that wasn’t enough, matt’s honking was.

as you opened the door, you were greeted with chris standing there with a box on donuts in his hand and a small smile on his face.

“hi.”

you stepped back to let him in, waving at matt who didn’t leave until his brother safely made it inside.

“hi, chris.”

“i got you donuts.” his voice was soft, almost hesitant to speak.

“thank you.” you nodded, watching him place the treat on your counter, “i actually wanted to talk. about us.”

his shoulders dropped, voice cracking slightly as he turned to look at you, “are you breaking up with me?”

“what? no. i wanted to apologize for being so hard on you.” you were shocked that he assumed you were breaking up with him, but you could understand why he thought that.

“wha—?”

“it was wrong of me to completely blow you off, even when you were trying so hard to make it right.”

“no, no. i’m supposed to be apologizing to you.” he stopped your rant, taking your hand and moving so you were both sat on the couch,

“i accused you of cheating on me. i let one small thing almost ruin our relationship so quickly when i should have asked you first instead of cursing and blocking you before you had the chance to defend yourself.”

“chris—”

“i love you and i’m sorry for making you think that i didn’t trust you.”

“i love you and i’m sorry for refusing to speak to you when you were trying to explain yourself.”

chris let of a breath of relief, smiling sweetly in your direction, “can i kiss you?”

your eyes creased as you smiled. you put your hands on his cheeks, pulling him forward to press a small kiss to his lips.

though it wasn’t enough, chris didn’t complain, “i’ll take what i can get.” he leaned forward, putting his body over yours, wrapping his arms around your body,

“i missed you so much.” his voice was muffled against your hair.

“i missed you more, baby.”

•••

christophersturniolo made a post !

comments

sturnsbabylove YESSSSSS

ynxchris tears are streaming down my face rn 😭👏

>>> lovelysturn literally me

matthew.sturniolo safe to say bro cried three times a week for her forgiveness

liked by yn.ln and 37,493 others

>>> christophersturniolo (creator) bro shut up 😭

nicksgiraffehat y’all thought they broke up 💀

nickssecretbf back with the couples content

>>> christophersturniolo (creator) yessir 🫡

yn.ln ❤️❤️

>>> christophersturniolo (creator) ^ love of my life fr 😔❤️

liked by yn.ln and 72,485 others

>> sturnnniolosbae they’re too cute 😭

nicolassturniolo i can confirm that they “ball”

>>> yn.ln this is so millennial of you

>>> nicolassturniolo thanks bae 😌

sturnsbabe THEYRE BACK ‼️‼️

tap to view more comments

•••

sturniolodrama made a post !

comments

sturnslover bro… @/christophersturniolo @/yn.ln

letstripbaby oh my god 💀😭 @/yn.ln

nicolassturniolo 💀

>>> secretlynicksturn lmaooo 😭

yn.ln wtf did i say about tagging me in this shit 😐

liked by matthew.sturniolo and 32,586 others

chrisyn I CANNOT 😌🤦‍♀️

christophersturniolo has blocked sturniolodrama

matthew.sturniolo has blocked sturniolodrama

yn.ln has blocked sturniolodrama

nicolassturniolo has blocked sturniolodrama

*edit* sturniolodrama (creator) they blocked me guys…

>>> sturnswife good💀

liked by lovelysturn and 135,846 others

tap to view more comments

taglist: @creamoncreamoncream2 @strnlsblog @emssturniolo @noirpxrker @seobiiezs @sleepysturnss @junnniiieee07 @1201pm @dancemomsfanee @bri4nnaaaa @stinkytinkywinky @leah-loves-lilies @p1xieswrld @sturniolopepsi @chrissturniolosbitch

#sturniolo triplets #nick sturniolo #chris sturniolo x reader #matt sturniolo x reader #chris sturniolo fluff #chris sturniolo imagine #matt sturniolo imagine #matt sturniolo fluff #chris sturniolo #matt sturniolo

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kiwioala · 6 months

Text

since early day lore keeps being referenced, here are some good early qsmp lore vods to watch if you're ever curious about what all went down:

any day 1 pov: really good introductory content (obviously), even for the lore. there’s a lot of cutscenes from that specific day iirc as well which i always think are beneficial to watch! also everyone’s first reactions to cucurucho/osito bimbo are fucking hilarious

roier, day 4: explains his and osito bimbo’s dynamic, they spend a large part of the day together.

roier, day 5: the betrayal the day of spreens betrayal, self explanatory. this is also the day we get the book from osito bimbo where it calls roier "0037"

any day 7 pov: egg's introduction morse code transmission about an “experiment,” the day the original eggs got adopted, shows how the attitude toward the eggs has changed since then, possibly could help explain some of the family dynamics?? at least how they function and treat the kids

roier, day 10: osito bimbo makes it's return but now it's different, (sort of) the day cucurucho officially takes osito bimbo's place

slime or roier, day 16: tilin's death the day of tilin's death, ultimately had a lot of impacts on various characters on the island like slime, roier, and quackity, for example.

slime, day 20: avenging juanaflippa slime tries to get flippa another chance at life by forcing a reset of all the eggs lives, meaning he goes after and targets the other player's eggs.

day 21: "save the baby" quest aka the first egg kidnapping/disappearance (continued in day 22 due to server maintenance). a rescue mission given to the islanders via egg tasks to go retrieve their eggs!

day 22 (slime, mariana, roier, bbh, quackity, foolish, jaiden, philza): juanaflippa's custody trial and revival really fucking funny but also a part of the servers history that i feel like got brushed over too fast. confirms the federation can give extra lives to the eggs if they are so willing and some other stuff.

luzu, day 24: final (physical) arin appearance explains why arin was there, what his purpose is, and how the codes are related to him. can also been seen in foolish and bbh's vod from this day.

foolish, day 26: introduction to leo’s “friends” and a few island entities, the founding of the theory bros (now ordo theoritas) which can also be seen in max and bad’s pov that day!

day 27: the funeral a funeral is held for all the dead eggs (trump, tilin, and flippa) and i believe it's the first time the federation allows parents to talk to their children after their death. for this day, most pov's do go to the funeral service, but only parents of the dead eggs (quackity, slime, mariana, and maxo) get to see their children.

anyones pov, day 34: “the countdown begins, 6 days left.” codes intercept the ducks transmission (again?) and alert the parents that the eggs will die/disappear in 6 days. we know now this obviously isn't true but still a lore-ish day

roier, day 34: even more osito bimbo content! the day when osito bimbo tells roier more about the federation, such as the existence of the "host" and how it has a specific set of duties it must follow/complete.

quackity, day 36: quackitys interrogation & las casualonas debut disguised, roier and vegetta interrogate quackity about his plans regarding the eggs (which iirc was a rumor started by roier saying he was going to murder them) and the island.

maxo, day 50: sofias creator visits maxo important for current lore seeing as the person who gave him said instructions is now known to be a part of the revolution etoiles was recruited into.

#qsmp #qsmp lore #qsmp recap #? i guess #most of these r roier or slime they carried early-day lore #feel free to add any other vods/clips u think r important im sure im missing some

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charmedreincarnation · 11 months

Note

Ya bitch got into the void state

Champagne anon here and your mf girlll got in the mf void state and manifested her dream life. This happened a week ago, and I’ve been chilling but I do wanna share my story to help others. Gotta give Thanks to Maya, and so many other bloggers and even anon. Y’all hoes will forever be in my heart, and I’m forever grateful 🥹 also Maya girl you told me when I succeed to get into detail and I got nothing to do for the next two hours so imaaa just share it all here in detail.

I also wanna especially thank all the black creators on tumblr!! I didn’t know there were so many of us using the law. It always seems the world is so against us, and there’s nothing we can do abt it but nahhhh!! we can all live our best melanated lives regardless. Periodt, as we should it’s about goddamned time after everything we’ve been though 😂

Anyways!!!! after reading this: https://www.tumblr.com/charmedreincarnation/717864613626134528/im-your-bubble-anon-but-i-made-this-burner-to success story yesterday I got hella motivated. I read that shit and I thought I posted it on accident because it was everything I had been through, and had been thinking anyways. That anon ate your tumblr habits btw. If y’all haven’t seen my good sis’s sucess post go check that shut out rn, On god it will help.

At the end that anon (my mf dawg 🙏) included that they manifested for everyone. Now ion know if that shit actually work tbh. I’ve seen people say you can and can’t, but tbh the vibes were too high for me to doubt. I was like ight, okay fuck it, ima leave my dream life. Whether it me, that anon, or the devil himself ion give a fuck.

So that’s whatssss a bitch did!!! I just affirmed all day it was very fulfilling. People who hate on affirming are mad corny. I can’t lie that shit works hella fast even if you don’t believe it. Idk if that anon’s void manifesting helped or what but I didn’t do much and after 3 months of trying I entered the damn void state. I’m mad I thought I had to be on some ghandi shit to do this (no hate to him hes da man) but you rlly don’t y’all. BUT LEMME TALK MY SHIT ALL YOU NEED IS AFFIRMING AND PERSISTENCE.

Anyways I went go bed excited asl!! I wrote my script that was like 10 pages long I can’t lie I did the most… but it’s whateva. I woke up in the void state after waking up at 4 am or sum, and i was like oh shityyyt lemme manifest rq and skrttt out this hoe. So that’s what a mf did 😂😂

Anyways the part y’all’s is waiting for. This is what ya girl manifested

Desired face and body. I was in shock how all the details came to life. Y’all im a solid 100/10 it’s giving natural bbl and Aliyah. I swear to gahhh everywhere I go people be trying to peep. I’m not used to being treated like a fucking celeb everywhere I go, whole time it’s just my fat gyattttt

Being the hottest 16 yr old IT GIRL at my school, and having lucky girl syndrome. People call me a mini jayda wayda, but tbh I’m better than her now. No hoe is ever gonna cheat on meee like they did her…bye. She’s still gorgeous as fuck tho

Perfect school life. Your girl is set to be the Valedictorian when I graduate (my school has 4!) I’m also sophomore year President, captain of the basketball team, apart of some volunteer programs through my school, and so much more. My resume and college application is abt to be so fuckin fire in 2 years. As I should Columbia is a competitive ass school 😤😤 that aside everyone always tryna link, I got 3 guys fighting over me (whole damn love square), so many people tryna be my friends, teachers love me, and I excel in everything I do.

My Family being rich assss fuck. My dad got a Wikipedia now and his net worth is 22 million dollars. He owns a hedge fund company now, we love a man in finance 😍😍 AS HE FUCKING SHOULD. He got a material gurlll daughter. Two in fact now.

Fire ass crib. Bro it’s a 9 million dollar penthouse, perfect for ragers. I woke up here and my room is decorated to my personality, pintrest clothes all in my closet, I got an exotic pitbull and frenchie, and the house is just mad clean and fire, I’m obsessed with it. Rarely ever wanna leave now.

My mom not being strict. That bald headed ass hoe use to be mad annoying. Y’all know how Haitians are. Mad annoying as fuck and strict for no reason. Now I go out everyday and come home at midnight and no one gives a fuck. Everyone minds their own business as they should.

Having an older brother and younger sister. I was an only child, because I was a miracle baby bc my mom was infertile. Now she got 3 of us, so she can stop being only in my buisness. I’m just playin I love my mom regardless she’s just hella clingy. Anyways my brother is mad protective but also be wrestling mad aggressive for no damn reason. He gave me a bruise but it’s whateva Ima get my lick back. I also always wanted to be an older sister, bc I’d love to be a role model! My sister is 10 and adores me soo much it’s so adorable 🥹 lmfaooo, she’s mad spoiled by me and my mom but it is what it is.

Successful lip gloss business and being a successful drop shipper. Now you didn’t think a sista wasn’t gonna give herself a career just because I’m young right 🤨🤨 we’ll ya wrong. Ya girl is making 200k-400k a year. I barely even use my money cause I got an allowance from my parents… but still, financial literacy and wealth is so important to me especially as a black woman.

A pookie bae. Y’all know I wasn’t gonna deal with finding a loyal cute and funny guy in nyc. It’s like finding a needle in a haystack. Anyways I got me a fine ass boo. I just wrote down all the features I wanted in him like for exampleS finically secure so he can spoil me, handsome as fuck, tall, funny asl, kind, little clingy, deep raspy voice, nice hand, good hygiene and style,yanno yanooo !!! Plus some other shit and whewww the void did me so good. Nowww my boo bear is a lil cracker and I’ve never dated a white boy befuh but my am I surprised. I wake up everyday with some long ass appreciation texts and plans already made ! Y’all know I love me a dominant man who knows what he wants. He’s got some nice ass clothes, nice car and crib, made me a passenger princess and spoils me way too much. He doesn’t complain abt my mood swings and simps in the best way possible. Not to mention he’s fine afkkk he’s giving vinnie hacker. He’s also 6’1 and I’m 5’1 so that height difference is soooo hot I can’t lie I feel so so safe with him 🫣 I could go on all day but in short he’s more than perfect

+ so much more but this is what shocked me the most. Anyways I’ve been living like this for the past week and it just feel so natural. I keep forgetting I got into the void but whateva I’m the only who knows anyways. Anyways live yo best life and neva give upppp. I gotta go but I’ll probably eventually make a blog. My names angela so look out for it. I’m just mad lazy soo idk tho !!!

Angela out 🫡✌️

Girl this was so fun to read, I’m just as excited for you lmfao. I love seeing black women win, and thank you for sharing your methods! Enjoy your best life and come back if it resonates with your life bae !!!

#law of assumption #manifesation #manifesting #void state #law of attraction #void success

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ecoamerica · 20 days

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youtube

Watch the American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 now: https://youtu.be/bWiW4Rp8vF0?feature=shared

The American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 broadcast recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by active climate leaders. Watch to find out which finalist received the $50,000 grand prize! Hosted by Vanessa Hauc and featuring Bill McKibben and Katharine Hayhoe!

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plantsjustwannahavefun · 7 months

Text

I keep seeing so many people here getting angry that this season is "vilifying Ed", and it's depressingly fascinating to see how others can watch the same show and somehow see something completely different. Is it simply the lack of media literacy? Is it the inability to appreciate and enjoy complex, nuanced, morally grey characters without willfully blocking out anything even slightly unpalatable about them to the point where the character they think they love isn't really that character anymore?

Because, uh... Season 1 already "vilified" Ed plenty. Except "vilify" is the wrong word, of course. It wasn't in any way malicious or mean-spirited, quite the contrary, it was often played as comedic (until the end of episode 10 when it was anything but) - Ed was always meant to be a sympathetic character, he's a protagonist after all, and the show's portrayal of him is very compassionate. It merely refused to sugarcoat or shy away from his darker side. He's literally history's most famous pirate, you don't become one by being nice and treating everyone gently. He ambushed and strangled his own father to death when he was like 9 years old (100% deserved and justifiable ofc, but it still bears saying it out loud like this just to comprehend how unhinged this actually was). He loves torturing and maiming people for fun, and sometimes even animals (that scene with forcing a turtle to fight a crab). He didn't give a fuck about his crew members dying to satisfy his whim to meet Stede. He entirely failed in his role as a captain in ep 4. He effectively played a double agent with Izzy and Stede for a while before changing his mind. He attempted to murder Lucius. And while you could try to argue his punishment of Izzy was at least to some degree deserved, not only cutting Izzy's toe off but forcing him to eat went beyond punishment, it was sadistic torture.

So, yeah, please just read all that and take it in. And then remember once again that Ed is also a traumatised, lonely, depressed, sensitive, creative, curious, deeply passionate person yearning for true love and for something different in life... just like Stede. He loves music and can play the piano. He wrote a very vulnerable song and sand his heart out. He likes his tea with seven sugars. He enjoys fashion and dressing up. He has such a limitless sense of wonder for the world. He went on a trek with Stede just to make him happy, even though he hated nature and was in a shit mood that day. He wants to host a talent show. He wants to become free. He's clever and funny and fascinating. I love Ed.

Yes, it's possible to reconcile those two sides of him and accept both sides as the "real" Ed. You have to reconcile the two sides if you want to enjoy him as a character, because if you don't, you're going to either detest him to the core (which would make enjoying the show practically impossible since he's sort of a main character...), or you'll only be able to enjoy a diminished, crippled, cardboard cutout version of his character, which would be such a pity and a massive disservice to the creators of this show who worked hard to create interesting, multidimensional characters.

Not to mention you'd be missing one of the core messages of the show - the idea that people still deserve love and can be loved even if they're imperfect, or not necessarily good people. Because love is a human condition. It's not a sole dominion of "good" people. "Bad" people can fall in love too - even if, just like them, that love isn't exactly "nice" or "pure", and neither are the relationships that stem from it. They can be messy and exasperating. But "bad" people can also grow and change because of it. That's what OFMD is ultimately about - growth and change, learning to accept yourself but also become better. That can't happen if the character is already 100% perfect the way they are.Ed is far from that. So is Izzy. They can both become better, and they both still deserve compassion and understanding, because that's the environment people need to become better.

So, if you're mad that at the start of S2 the crew are sympathetic to Izzy's suffering and want to help him instead of kicking him when he's down, and what Ed did to him is being acknowledged as cruel and wrong... congratulations, you have completely missed what OFMD is all about.

#normally I hate fandom drama and hate getting involved but I've seen too many of those posts #so unfortunately it needs saying #and tbh there seem to be a few Izzy fans out there who are unreasonably hateful and unsympathetic towards Ed too #so they need to hear this as well #izzy hands #blackbeard #ofmd ed teach #ofmd #our flag means death #our flag means death s2 #ofmd s2 spoilers

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antianakin · 13 days

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Pong Krell. It’s universally agreed that he deserved worse than what he got and I get that. I just wished we got to see what he was like before he Fell. Did he always hate clones, was it gradual? Did he suspect something off and went over paranoid?

I’ll say this one and I’ll say this probably a thousand more times but I wished the creators focused on more details with characters. It’s absolutely fascinating that they created a Jedi that Fell but did nothing with it besides outright evil.

How other Jedi reacted to learning that a fellow Jedi betrayed everyone? How did the Republic?

I just wished they did more with him than just, yeah that dude was a dick and killed clones.

Yeah, it's one of the things I don't like as much about TCW, the extremely episodic nature of it means that there really is never any build-up to anything or lasting impact from anything. Unless it's happening within one of the 2-4 episode arcs, we RARELY get to see any kind of build-up or fallout. It's one of the major issues with Barriss, too, we see her ONCE in season 2 and she's calm, kind, methodical, and selfless. And then three seasons later in season 5 she's suddenly ruthless, selfish, doubting everything and everyone, merciless, etc. There is NO BUILD UP to that radical 180 to her character and there's no real exploration of how Ahsoka really feels about that particular betrayal afterwards, the focus in later episodes after the Wrong Jedi focuses only on Ahsoka feeling betrayed by the COUNCIL and her feelings about that. Nothing since TCW has ever touched it either (Rebels, Mandalorian, the Ahsoka show). Satine's death never really comes up again after it happens aside from Bo-Katan being an asshole. Obi-Wan goes from being totally fucked up about Maul coming back to being chill enough to take on Maul and Savage alone and winning without us getting to see him actually deal with those emotions.

Pong Krell and the Umbara arc IN GENERAL falls into this category easily (so do the Zyggeria and the Deception arc tbh). Krell is such a basic evil character, there's so little nuance to him and we never get to see the Jedi react to the revelation that one of their own turned at all. Dooku turned after he had already left the Order as far as any of them really know, but Krell was still IN the Order when he decided to betray them and it would've been really interesting to see the impact of that on them. It would've been ESPECIALLY interesting to explore that more during the Wrong Jedi arc in particular in how the Jedi feel like they can't trust their own people not to betray them anymore after Dooku and Krell.

Krell is presented with like. Zero nuance. He is just unequivocally evil and despite Anakin greeting him in a friendly way at the beginning, the visuals tell you this dude's no good right from his first appearance. There isn't really any chance that he's going to be a good guy at all. So all we are left with are headcanons.

And I remember discussing my Krell headcanons somewhere, but I think it might've been on a Discord server I've since left, so I unfortunately cannot find them again. So I'll try to remember them and immortalize them here, I guess.

Here's the thing about Krell. NO ONE suspects him. So he cannot be overtly acting like a bigoted asshole from the jump at any point, he HAS to be acting in such a way that it's not trickling out to the other clones and to the Jedi themselves that Krell is an absolute monster. Even Fives takes a moment to decide that Krell is suspicious and only brings up Krell's casualty numbers after he sees Krell's behavior for a minute and combines that knowledge with what he's now personally experiencing and is starting to come to conclusions based on that. He doesn't go into the relationship thinking Krell is worse than any other Jedi already.

And based on what we know of EVERY OTHER FALLEN JEDI (Dooku, Anakin, Barriss), they didn't start out as monsters. Dooku was a highly respected Jedi Master who seems to have had a really positive relationship with Yoda and Qui-Gon and simply became disillusioned with the Senate and his care for the people of the galaxy got twisted into something darker over time. Barriss was kind, selfless, compassionate, brave, and resourceful, and it was the war that caused her to start letting her fears and pain consume her into turning on the Jedi. Anakin was kind and spent years having his fears and doubts twisted into selfishness and greed and darkness that allowed him to justify murder and genocide for power. So it wouldn't make sense to me that Pong Krell wouldn't fall into the same pattern where he was once kind and good and selfless and brave, but that the circumstances surrounding the war caused him to lose faith and fall.

My headcanon is that he lost an entire battalion early in the war, much like we see happen to Plo Koon during the Malevolence arc and that that loss and failure just BROKE him. Krell DID care about the clones, he cared about his men, and he FAILED them all. And I think that he saw all of these clones dying by the dozens in all of the other battalions and instead of choosing to let go of his pain and fear and lean into his compassion, he chose to distance himself from them entirely to make it hurt less. If he didn't care about the clones, if he just saw them as the cannon fodder that the Senate treated them all as, then it would hurt less when they died. Maybe the Senate itself even dragged him over the coals for that initial loss. Or perhaps it was the opposite, maybe most of his battalion was killed, but it ultimately ended in a victory anyway because they were forced to just keep going despite the consequences. And so Krell decides to enter this mindset where he is disillusioned with the Senate and just CANNOT allow himself to care about the clones, because it won't change what the Senate is going to do to them anyway, so he may as well just treat them the same way.

And this wouldn't have happened overnight. It wouldn't have been a sudden 180 where he decided he was just going to treat them like shit. But he maybe decided to put some more professional distance between himself and his new battalion, not get close to them, not use their names (although he still knows them, still remembers them all). Maybe one day they're in a tricky situation and all of his options are bad, he HAS to sacrifice some of his men in order to salvage the situation at all, and it's a choice between a full retreat that he KNOWS the Senate won't take well, or sacrificing the men to achieve the victory. So he sacrifices the men. It's not an entire battalion, it's not even a whole company, but it's more than it would've been if he'd retreated. Maybe next time, there's a choice between going back to save some of the men even if it poses a risk to his own life or the mission or something, and he chooses not to go back for them because the mission is more important, or he rationalizes that his life is more important as the Jedi General. And it's just more and more little decisions like that that add up over time to being able to see the clones as nothing more than tools.

The disillusionment with the Senate leads to him sort-of agreeing with things Dooku and the Separatists have said and he can look at the war and realize that it's entirely possible that the Republic is going to LOSE, and he CANNOT be the one who loses again, so maybe he starts bouncing around the concept of maybe switching sides. And of course initially he rejects the idea. He's a Jedi, he won't just abandon the Republic, he can't be a traitor, who in the Separatist side would ever trust him anyway. But once that seed is planted, it doesn't go away and it keeps coming back up and he keeps finding ways to rationalize why it might be a good idea and then deciding not to do it over and over again. Until one day, he can't convince himself that it's a bad idea or that it wouldn't work. He tells himself it's the ONLY option, if he doesn't change sides then he's dead. But Dooku WON'T trust him unless he can prove that he's not on the Republic's side, so he has to come up with a plan to gain their trust. And what better way to earn that trust than to ensure a Separatist victory in an important campaign by double-crossing the Republic.

And once he's chosen to go down that path, it's even EASIER to stop caring about the clones because, well, they're all dead anyway. The Republic is going to lose, the clones are all dead men walking no matter what, so why bother caring about them or trying to keep them alive? He can't lose so often that the Jedi or the Senate become suspicious of him, of course, but it's REALLY easy then to get to Umbara and treat the clones like crap and turn them against each other and intentionally try to get them all killed. They're dead anyway, he's not the one killing them really, is he, the Senate is, the Jedi are, the war is. They were dead from the moment they were created in that test tube because they were created for this specific purpose. It's not his fault.

And much like Barriss turns against the Jedi in part because she did LOVE the Jedi and was devastated by what she saw happening to them and the pain of seeing her people forced to become something they were never supposed to be, as much as her actions were intended as some kind of message to try to sort-of save the Jedi from a course of action she saw as their downfall, I think that Krell turns on the clones because at some point he DID care about them. A lot. And that care became his downfall, the pain at what was being done to them just absolutely gutted him and it threw him down a path that ultimately led him to turn against the very people whose deaths had hurt him so badly just a few short years ago.

Krell might not have been the most effusive or emotional person prior to the war or anything, he might've been a more reserved person similar to Mace or Dooku or Luminara, but I think he probably was a perfectly good Jedi who was kind and selfless and compassionate once upon a time.

And none of the headcanons above have even touched what his relationships with other JEDI must have been like. It's just as possible that he did have friends and people he considered family among the Jedi. Maybe he had a padawan once at some point. And maybe all of those people had died by the time we get to Umbara. Maybe he had to watch a lot of the people he was closest to just fall like flies, and so it starts feeling like nothing matters. Maybe one of the Jedi who died on Geonosis was a former padawan of his, but Krell himself obviously wasn't there and the pain of THAT loss and the guilt he feels at not having been there (even though this padawan had been knighted for a while and there was a good reason Krell wasn't there that day) just sticks with him, too, and he never quite manages to let that go, either.

I think a lot of people choose to just headcanon Krell as having just always been kind-of an asshole even when he was a Jedi, but that doesn't work for me. If Krell was always an asshole, I feel like the Jedi would've stepped in at some point before the war even HAPPENED and tried to manage that situation. And it doesn't match up with the way pretty much every other fallen Jedi has ever been written, where they were GOOD PEOPLE once upon a time who saw awful things happen that they couldn't stop or had an awful thing happen TO them that they couldn't stop and the pain of that experience consumes them to the point that they spiral into darkness as a result. Krell should be the same way, which means he likely was a perfectly good normal Jedi before the war. He would've been kind, he might've been good with younglings (he's tall, maybe he was the one the younglings went to all the time for piggy back rides, maybe he often taught dual wielding to padawans who asked because of how clearly proficient he is at it), he might've taught a student of his own successfully, he would've been wise and selfless and compassionate, he would've loved the Jedi and the people of the galaxy.

Like, to be frank, if Tales of the Jedi HAD to explore a fallen Jedi story, they should've explored Krell instead of Dooku. Dooku has been explored before, we know quite a lot about him and his motivations and his backstory, but Krell, as you noted, is left a mystery and is stuck in the realm of being just purely evil for the sake of the story they were telling in this one arc. Krell needed more nuance in a way Dooku just did not.

#star wars #pong krell #tcw #the clone wars #umbara #umbara arc #krell

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