Just wanted to say that I have been thinking of you and pre-emptively empathizing with the nonsense you are no doubt being flooded with and the psychic damage it must be causing. Keep stanning the king ignore the weirdos <3

thankg u.,, i feel like ive been trapped in a fuckign . Torture Labyrinth these past coupl days . but. wwe will. We Will Yet Persist onwards w/ our hand on the left wall till we;re either out or at the center i swear 2 fucking GOD,

no i fr couldnt... 200 dollars for the worst seats + wed have to get to ny and ill be looking for an apartment ariund that time and im already going to have spent a Lot of money to be in ky... heaviest sigh of my life

same anon who sent the ask abt price: MW3's writing was embarrassing tbh. i agree 100% that narratively, its the most logical and sensible for price to be the one who takes the fall. what you wrote i flat out completely agree with, and its deeply disappointing that we are stuck with an extremely poorly written and rushed story. the game was a hot steamy pile. everyone was slightly out of character, they all growled their lines like mad dogs, and the missions were ass. i cant believe no one talks about the mission where you get anti arab hate crimed. what was that??? what was the reason??? (the only thing i liked about that game were the 9 minutes of nikolai. i just find him entertaining.) i was replaying mw2019 while super high and got to the mission where you threaten the butchers wife and son and just thought to myself; that lady and that kid are gonna have nightmares about price for the rest of their lives. that room is going to come back to them again and again and again. they literally did nothing wrong except the crime of being the butchers family. what price and gaz did is never going to leave them, and gaz was right to question price on that. of course, the game doesn't care at all. they're disposable NPCS for a shock value scene. i dunno, the fact that the game doesn't really give a fuck, and seemingly even condones what happened, just kinda hit different and i had to put the game down for the evening. i guess that hit at that moment bc i had also read a fic a bit earlier where the reader was price's civvy gf and gets kidnapped by his enemies. it bent my brain a bit bc, the thing in the fic is literally a canon event perpetuated by price, portrayed as a good thing by the source material, that now price is the victim of. it was a very weird feeling for my weed addled brain to try and process. think i blue screened actually. i wanna put price in a jar and shake him vigorously. pin him to a board like a entomology insect. i want to bite him. i do love him i swear. but maybe make him actually face a single real consequence for his war crimes? (disappointing that it will never happen on screen bc these games are all gas no breaks outright propaganda. not to mention real war crimes are happening constantly in front of everyone's eyes and going completely unpunished) sorry this is really long, i have no one to talk to abt these games and i dont understand my feelings toward that British man

Yeah. The thing about Price is that he's not a good person in the slightest. We write fiction about the kind of man he can be--the best version of himself, a version we can all stomach--but the real Price is distinct from that, and the best people in this fandom recognize that.

Soap and Ghost have some plausible deniability simply because we haven't seen them doing anything other than action movie stuff. Gaz is on the road to becoming Price--Price is doing his damndest to turn Gaz into himself--but he isn't there yet. (@391780 did a GREAT analysis of the driving scene in mw19 and how Price subtly manipulates Gaz, but I can't find it.)

EDIT: Early kindly provided.

We, as the audience, are not actually supposed to worry that much about the Butcher's family, because Price is one of the Good Guys who would never let something Bad actually happen. Infinity Ward does not take the Butcher's family seriously, and does not want us to take the family seriously, because they are just a convenient vehicle with which to move the plot along. Their presence is, in the end, shock value. We are meant to stare, wide-eyed, wondering is Price really going to go that far? while in the back of our minds knowing of course he's not, because he's our hero. He's just doing whatever it takes. The family is not meant to be anything other than fodder for Price's characterization.

Same with Samara. We are not supposed to care all that much about her, personally--we're supposed to marvel over Makarov's canny brutality, his bRiLLiANcE in recognizing the obvious fact that an Arab woman would make a perfect scapegoat for a plane bombing. Samara does not matter to MW3. Only the shocking way she dies. None of these Arab characters matter to Call of Duty--only the entertainment value of their pain.

Not to put too fine a point on it, but I am reminded of when Price threw a man restrained into a bomb jacket off a balcony, with not a shred of remorse afterword. I'm forced to ask the question--who would Price scapegoat, then, if he felt justified enough?

And yeah, he's never going to suffer the consequences of his actions, because Infinity Ward doesn't think he's actually done anything wrong. We throw the word propaganda around a lot without actually defining it, but Price is emblematic of how the propaganda of Call of Duty works. Price does something reprehensible, and is shown to be justified in doing it--implying that real men like him are justified, too, because don't you understand how little choice Price had? Don't you get that there's no good choice to be made? This is how he has to act, and this is how all soldiers have to act, because war is a dirty business, and someone needs to be willing to do it for the benefit of the ignorant public.

The question of why any of this should be happening at all is never asked.

journal/braindump 26/3/24

i hope life gets better soon. school is so miserable and weird and i just constantly feel like my physical shape is blurred and i'm but a a faceless entity drifting through the crowded and sweaty halls. when i speak to people it feels like i have to physically force myself to and i'm always so conscious of the fact that i would really love it if i were alone and not speaking to anybody at all.

i don't feel confident in myself and i feel like this year has passed by way too fast and i feel like just attempting to live feels like a bunch of cold sand is piled in my hands, and like sand does, it slips easily through my fingers and all i can do is watch. i feel so stupid and so naive all the damn time

for a while i had believed that everything would be okay, and then for a while after that i believed that i should kill myself. i'm okay now, i still feel very unsettled and it's like i'm not really me but i feel fine enough to function and i feel fine enough to live and wish to keep on living

i wish to keep on living

tomorrow i will wake up early and i will make myself coffee and i will sit down and read (i've had reading block for 2 days- which seems short but its annoying for me bc i really really want to read but i feel too restless and distracted to). i'll try to be nice to myself and protect my peace really hard and go on walks or something

i find that watching youtube videos where people just sit and talk, or rearrange their house and books, is really calming to me. i can't wait to just sit in front of the tv with a cup of matcha and a box of chocolates and just watching people talk, or watch all the movies ive been meaning to watch for sooo long

autumn is rolling around, and i'm infinitely greatful that it is because i always feel so inspired during this season. autumn makes me want to read, it makes me want to watch more films and eat more food and drink warm drinks that make me feel okay inside.

i also hope to pick up journalling again, but i'm not sure if i will because i don't have my own printer for images and idk what to journal but i have recently tried to just draw pictures- ive recently written journal pages on what i want to read, and also an "about me" page, and hand drew pictures. it's nice, but it doesn't give the same effect as full out journalling (with stickers, images, tape, etc... sigh.). i hope i journal more this holiday nonetheless.

i also hope to read without feeling so much pressure. i usually have no problem with reading whatever i want to read, as i like to think of myself as somebody who isnt easily influenced by other people's views (eg. if someone told me i have to read a certain book, i will consider it but i wont read it unless i want to) , but lately i've been thinking of all the books i want to read this holiday (for me i have autumn break in one week- and autumn break lasts for 2 weeks) and as u can imagine, it is very stressful bc ive somehow fallen into the mindset that i must read ALL of those books before next term or else.

fyi the books comprise of

- the complete collection of jane austen

- the complete collection of sherlock holmes

- the poppy war

- the iliad

- hamlet

- the metamorphosis

soo yeah... especially the first two points are stressing me out haha... im starting the poppy war now but im a little nervous bc ppl keep saying that its VERY gory??? and i usually dont care abt such things but lately my nerves and emotions have been such a wreck that i dont trust myself to read it in a calm manner

i'll try to break free of this toxic reader mindset tho! it would be nice if i could talk to people abt books, so it feels like im engaging with my hobby while not actually having to do the hobby, but nobody ik irl will want to talk abt books as i do

MAN i so badly want to rant abt booktok (ok actually i wont expand on this bc its a very sore point for me in the sense that i might get worked up over it and then feel shit afterwards for displaying sm emotion)

anywaysss next topic

ummm i get my maths result back on thursday and im so fucking scared bc i know i messed up bad for a few questions but im not sure if it was enough to drop me down to a b... idk i REALLY REALLY WANT AN A. like istg my whole self esteem for until the next exams roll around is goijg to be based off my maths result.. fuck im so emotionally immature its laughable

ummm also i have literature class tmr and i love lit class but we have to watch fucking "shes the man" and im sorry but i hate that movie so so much (ive never watched it before but we watched half of it last lesson and it was soo annoying). ughh why is my eng teacher making us watch this 😭😭

also my eng teacher is very blunt and therefore very interesting to talk to so ive been wanting to ask him abt books hes read lately but i CANT bc we have to watch thats tupid fucking movie and also he has to mark papers :( but also like hes the only intellectually stimulating person ik irl so what am i meant to do with all of my buzzing book thoughts ughh (rhetorical question. pls dont answer) :(

hmm what else is there to say

oh yeah last night i had a dream tjat i got a B+ for english and that was... it was like a nightmare im not even kidding. it was such a vivid dream too- everybody else got an A meanwhile i got a B+ (very close to an A) and i was just absolutely shocked and i desperately begged my teacher to give me some extra credit work so i can bump it up to an A-... yeah...

oh but also back to me wanting to have a better life- i think i'll take myself to the thrift more and go out with my friend (yes, singular. theres only one friend that i like hanging out with outside of school 💀) atleast once this holiday... thats what teen girls my age do, right??? haha...

also i want to watch ladybird and the perks of being a wallflower and rewatch little women and dead poets society !

i also might reread solitaire but aghh that makes me stressed out abt reading again... fuck. maybe i should just take a break from reading omfg

i cant wait to wake up early tomorrow and drink coffee though! :)

also i will make more spotify playlists (it makes me rlly happy to) and MAYBE even try cooking????????????? man idfk im desperate okay? feeling suicidal is not fun and i dont want to feel like that again this year. i cant afford thay bc im meant to be an academic weapon :( (lol who am i kidding? im more like an academic victim)

also maybe i will just text my friends more in general. it stresses me out and makes me feel icky but the other day, i had a nice and fun and lighthearted texting convo with one of my class friends and it made me realise that i should probably text people more ...

lol

anyways i think thats all? i think ive gotten everything off my chest for now. i liked doing this actually. maybe i'll do it more often idk 💀💀

hope u guys have a good day 🙏 i dont actually expect anyone to read this but if you did, i hope you have a good day TIMES TWO!

no refunds :}

silly rant about wendy and stan :3

but like the rants are seperate

so to whoever wants to read this shit i think wendy doesnt work with anyone else besides stan. if you say "kyle can treat her better!" first of all stfu u kyndy shippers are annoying asf and second of all no he would not. he would clearly get jealous of other guys and he would be really controlling (not in earlier seasons) and lets just be fr for a sec... wendy would either fall out of love or get back with stan again because yknow they always go back to eachother. and plus an arguement between wendy and kyle would be ugly especially if theyre together, they both can get mad asf and the arguement would last ATLEAST a few days. and atleast stan can handle her disagreeing and yelling at him. now lets see who else shes paired with. i wanna talk abt wendy and token. first of all i dont believe wendy ever loved token because we never see theyre relationship outside of raisins. what i believe is that wendy only dated token to try and get stans attention because he did neglect the relationship and maybe she was attention-hungry. and now the final one i wanna talk to about is cartman. i hate wendy x cartman (more than i hate kyndy) because we know it would never work. she even said that she lost all feelings towards cartman after chef goes nanners. and even if you argue and say that they had good chemestry in that episode let me remind you that she ran back to stan at the end of the episode. she clearly hates cartman and clearly would rather killherself than date cartman. i dont think cartman deserves to be with anyone (except maybe yentl) because he's pretty much unlovable.

now onto stan, i dont think he works with anyone but wendy. lets take a look at style. first of all kyle has left stan several times before. he left him for token and he also never helped him with his depression in your getting old. but guess who was there to cheer him up? wendy was. wendy was one of the only people that didnt get sick of him in that episode and it really shows how much she cares for stan. and in you have 0 friends even though wendy was kinda being... weird, stan did listen to her and tried to edit his settings on his facebook.

also i wanna bring up... best friends doesnt = dating.

also i wanna talk abt stendy as a relationship. i think that they might be able to work as friends but as partners is when theyre dynamic works best. girlboss and loser bf. in all honesty stan and wendy might have the best dynamic/healthiest relationship out of everyone. theyve been shown to care about eachother lots of times and in the older seasons was when they really had their cutest moments. modern stendy isnt bad either, wendy is able to forgive stan at the end of the chat gpt episode because she loves him. and stan really cares for wendy too. he went with wendy to see shitty movies just to spend time with her and he also wrote a song for her. stendy is my absolute favorite ship and i hate when ppl make them cheat on eachother. stan would never and wendy wouldnt either. and one thing i noticed is that stan is loyal to wendy, sure he may have had a few crushes on other girls but, he never actually tried to make a move on any of them (except ms ellen) but through out all their break ups, stan never dating anyone besides wendy, which shows he really does love her enough to the point where he would hit on anyone while she was gone

also this section is just random but i wanted to put it here:

would stan work with other girls?

theres 3 main people i wanted to pair stan with. heidi, bebe, and red. first i want to talk abt is red and stan. i feel like they would be more friends than lovers. we dont really see much of reds personality but we do know that she acts like the other girls. stan doesnt really interact with girls that much so we dont really see a certain dynamic between them. another girl i want to talk abt is bebe. bebe is an interstening character, she can be nice, outgoing and funny but she can switch up to be sassy and rude. stan and bebe are like the listeners/jocks of their groups. they both have their hobbys that go on the field (stan plays football and bebe is a cheerleader). i feel like stan and bebe would be besties shit talking everybody. and lastly i want to move onto heidi. i feel like they could work as an alternate incase stan and wendy have a permenant break up (lets be honest thats never happening). i feel like heidi likes/ is fond of stan. she went up to him for advice abt cartman and he's probably the one that knows cartman the least. and in the bracelets episode he asked her for glue which i find funny. and i feel like their love of animals would help them bond.

ok i think im done with this rant

so basically:

wendy and kyle dont get along prob, stendy is a healthy relationship, cartman and wendy hate eachother, stan and red are mutuals, stan and bebe are prob besties, and stan and heidi could work but like... stendy solos.

ok bye yall

Yk what ive already made all my statements abt the teen wolf movie on instagram but imma say it here

As much as i love and breath teen wolf, its not the perfect show which is fine bc recognizing that is what makes its good. The thing is the movie? Godawful. The one thing i can appreciate is that the movie had an opening and the graohic design was cool

My problems with it?

-the plotline being abt allison. I think alisson (is it allison or alisson?) Is a fine character especially in s3, however, you killed her off. That whole s3 ending was abt her dying and isaac leaves BECAUSE of allison dying. Now ur gonna reopen that plotline that was TIED OFF? Ur not even gonna get stiles or isaac back into play even tho theyre arguably the most important for that season. And ur not gonna tell us how s6 ended??? Even with a flashforward of 2 years??

-the fbombs. Im sorry, what? U make a show that doesnt use f bombs at all and u make it creepy and horror but when u make the movie thats r rated meaning u can go even harder... u use it on fbombs? Might i add in the worst way possible. "Darkness motherfucker" wow. It just sounds so cringey. Either use it once meaningfully or dont drop one at all. U managed to make s3 be creepy without it do it again

-why the absolute fuck was liam in japan. By the hour and a half mark that question wasnt explained and it never was. Him and this girl hikari (whos gr8 actually) are just in japan and i guess own a bar??? I dont even know what they are to eachother let alone how they ended up there. I only knew that they love eachother bc they say that in jpn but like still??? Is it a sibling ily or a were dating and ily?

-the actors. Im sorry but if ur gonna get all these actors like masons and parrish and malia and whoever but u give them like what one line? Mason had legit like 2 lines in that movie. And u dont even know how he beacme a police officer! He just is! And they dont even say anything abt corey??? U could easily get his actor i know he aint doin anything rn. Liam and hikari? Also have like 3 lines in the movie

-personal thing lol but not everyone looks good with a beard and a shaved head

-lydia and stiles. Just bc u coudnt get dylan obrien cuz hes like the most succesful does NOT mean u just break up the couple that u built for six. seasons. You couldve said literally anything you couldve said stiles was dealing with some fbi shit or another supernatural disaster. Lydia having the dream? Tragic but stiles wouldnt have cared bc he loves her and wouldve just wanted to be with her forever.

-how can u not tell us who elis mother is. We ALLLL wanna know who derek banged im sorry but he slept with the enemy like three times and with his history and family history everyone just wants to know who it was.

-dereks death. WHAT THE FUCK this man survived a *pipe* going thru his back for like 10 minutes and survived, got brutally slashed and survived and ur telling me he died by magical fire. Sure teen wolf sure.

-if ur gonna introduce a character like alec in the season finale, bring him into play somehow recast him idc but do smt. Even nolan! Someone !

-what was with the whole nogitsune temple thing?? It was so... not scary at all and it looked bad. Like idk it was just so kiddy. Like oh noooo we re trapped bc we re tied to a pole with rope -_-

-sorry but again why continue a plotline that has been tied off? And not continue with the one that was open ended when u cant even get the significant actors for the s3 plotline? Bring daniel sharman into play, medicis over he has the freetime.

-malia and scott breaking up is also stupid bc again they were "endgame" and they had no reason to break up other than the fact that allison was alive again and for plot reasons.

-harrison coming back was so stupid i was so glad they killed him off even tho i guess they never found his body. I was hoping

-are argent and melissa not dating anymore? Its been like 3 months since ive seen the movie so i dont rememeber that but if they arent, why are the writers/producers, whoever, so desperate to break up everything great they had goin at the end of the show.

The interesting parts of the movie were

-the intro

-elis backstory with his dad, except why would u hate derek its literally tyler hoechlin

-and scott having an animal clinic bc i think thats funny

CLEM!!!

Happy birthday, lovely! I hope you're happy and healthy! So sorry I didn't see your post earlier, I've been having a very hectic year with studying, working and just generalized stuff! BUT BUT I couldn't send you a inbox!

So like a said: HAPPY BIRTHDAY! you are one of the sweetest mutuals ever! And to celebrate that a gotta ask

What is your latest read?

And I want to know your all time favorite Jason fics, please with links and all!

LOVE OF MY LIFE HELLO!!!

OMG PLS DONT APOLOGISE I KNOW HOW HECTIC LIFE CAN GET!! i hope you are taking good care of yourself, resting and relax outside of studies and work!!! remember that none of it matters if you aren't feeling good <33

MY LATEST READ OKAY

um truth be told my love i have been in SUCH a slump lately,,,, its been tough out here.

i only read like 3 books very recently (last month or so)

I did read All The Little Raindrops by Mia Sheridan my QUEEN. its like a mystery thriller with a side of romance!!! Sheridan's books are ALWAYS a hit (she's very popular for her booktok famous Archer's Voice? And Travis !!) I've read like. most of her books at this point. I have never devoted myself to an author so much. She got me into the whole thriller genre and I LOVE her. so much. ITS SO GOOD AAAA. its not for the faint of heart and on more than once i find myself with the need to throw up with how HORRIFYING and messed up some of this stuff is (most of her thriller books are not for the faint of heart. lots of horrific stuff that is all too real and it makes it 10x more disturbing). Anyway i loved it i think i gave it a 4/5 stars it was so so good

2. i ALSO started Ana Huang's If Love series. I literally never shut up about Ana Huang like. EVER and i had been wanting to read this for a while and IM SO GLAD I GOT IT STARTED !!! Its a LOT less popular than hr Twisted and Kings of Sin series; she wrote it well before she got popular/published but its so good. its def not Twisted/Kings of Sin series but it makes it sooo clear how much she's grown in her writing, character development and general story telling!!! I read the first 2 books and UGHGUGHUFGHUFGHG yeah. new comfort series fr fr fr fr.

I also got digging through Lynn Painter's works (Love Wager, Mr Wrong Number, Better Than The Movies, etc) 10/10 her rom coms are sacred to me. this was a while ago though like. months ago lmao but i think abt her books always!!!

OH OH OMG I READ BIRTHDAY GIRL BY PENELOPE DOUGLAS !!!! SOME TIME AGO!!! yeah it changed my brain chemistry. i dont remember if i told you or not. but it changed my life. i think about it always.

edit: omg shut up i forgot i read some banger books months ago that i did not mention. i ate up Liz Tomforde's sports romance series (Windy City series) it was SO FREAKING GOOD. she had hockey romance, she had basketball romance she had BASEBALL ROMANCE. 10/10 amazing vibes

I ate through the latest of Lauren Asher's (Love Redesigned) IT WAS ALSO HELLA GOOD!! Ana Huang's King of Greed was also a vibe. not my fav but it was good. I ALSO delved into hockey romance SOOO DEEP. Fav series is probably Becka Mack's Playing For Keeps. It's the silliest stupidest fluffy no plot head empty series ever. the first book is 90% porn. its just for the giggles. the second is a bit better but the third is def the best in terms of actual plot & character development for example but the vibes are astronomical and i live for them

i ALSO started reading Sarah Adam's small town romance series (very very good). All fluffy fall vibes. CHLOE GONG HAD COME OUT WITH A NEW BOOK IN THE SUMMER AND I GOT TO IT AROUND THE NEW YEAR AND IT WAS SOOO GOOOD. Immortal Longings mm......she destroyed me once again.

OKAY ALL TIME FAV JASON FICS ok i dont have links (is lazy to go find links) but i will tell you two blogs im like religiously stalking:

@in-som-niyah has AMAZING THOUGHTS on Jason 10/10 i love getting all my jason content from her GOD BLESS THE HARDWORKING PEOPLE OF TUMBLR DOT COM

@fcthots also has some kick ass Jason stuff....like....from smutty to fluffy and domestic its....yeah. oooghgubjgubgn yeah yeah.

anyway i've probably forgotten to mention a bunch of books but thats all i can remember that was actually good. HOW HAVE YOU BEEN WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN READING !!!

Rock Trolls shouldn't of been the ones to want to "unite" everyone by making everyone the same as them

said this earlier on twitter but seems easier to say/explain on tumblr idk why anyway

on twitter i said:

"can i speak for a second and say I wish in the second movie it wasn't the rock trolls trying to make everyone the same? its exactly what punk irl isn't about (rock came from punk) idk, I feel it could've been more interesting too if it was a diff type"

(i think some of the things i said there was incorrect like rock coming from punk but who knows i get my timelines mixed up sometimes LOL if that is incorrect ignore i sowy) anyway

i was thinking abt that again bc i think its interesting and like... to talk about it more here like- hm... idk

(click read more or something if you're genuinely interested in this lol)

i wish in the second trolls movie that the rock trolls was not the ones to be trying to make everyone the same as them, i can't begin to describe that is the entire opposite of what "rock" really is, or at least the type of rock they was displaying is the opposite of what it is

they was leaning a bit into the "punk rock" typa vibe with them due to their designs and such, the music not so much but design wise they feel like they lean towards punk rock, and if thats the case we can assume that "rock" in the movie also encapsulates "punk"

so with that being said it bugs me just a tad bit, that rock of all of them was used to be the ones to be like "we want to make everyone like us! make everyone the same to unite us!" bc thats so far from what actual punk is, in fact the whole thing about punk is to go against authority and express ourselves (yk, our differences)

ik im probably nitpicking a bit but i grew up with a punk for a dad (as in he was literally around when punk was formed, 1970's) LOL, its been apart of my life it is apart of my life so i know a bit about punk culture and what they stand for

SO IDK at the end of the day i dont really care, its a kids movie and i can see by default why they chose rock out of their options to be such a role for the movie, but idk! it just makes me a wee tiny intsy bit :( as punk literally does not stand for uniformity, it fights against systems that wants us to all be the same, it fights for individualism

but w/e, punk has that "aesthetic" that makes it easy to be like "wow theyre intense" bc visually they can be intense LOL, they're also easy to paint as """the bad guys""" due to their aesthetic (big quotes around the bad guys as more near the end as we know barb wasnt really trying to be evil, nor in general are the rock trolls aggressive and/or evil inherently)

anyway to end this off i love barb and i love the rock trolls, theyre so awesome i wish we had more time to develop barb a little bit more felt like she didnt get the screentime she deserved imo, live laugh love barb i dont express my adoration for her enough

if i delete this sorry i got anxious i dont expect this to get attention but if it does (positive or negative) im going to delete it (i have bad social anxiety)

soz if you did find this interesting and i delete it blehh

Here are my combined thoughts about Barbie (2023) as I saw it on the 18th and have had more time to think abt it.

Some good, some bad - overall I very much enjoyed it, laughed my ass off, cried quite a bit, was enthralled by the set and costume design, but left feeling like some things were off and perhaps not accomplished in the best way. This will all be delivered in bullet points in a very chaotic and random way and is NOT ordered in importance omg. Anyways i love media analysis and I will probably not explain this in the best way but HERE WE GO

the casting was fantastic, everyone read the assignment and lived their campiest life, margot robbie was phenomenal and ryan gosling absolutely killed me with laughter, glorious glorious

set design, costume, props,, perfection when it comes to bringing the mattel products to life. bangin'

i had that stupid fucking dog that eats and shits. i lost my mind when he came on hsdgkhakh

the message of barbie being representative of all little girls is still very lost on me. the idea brought up when barbie speaks to the teens, where they tell her that she gave them unrealistic body standards- well this never really gets resolved at all. Yes there was a diverse range of Barbies but they were all still beautiful in a conventional way that adheres to western beauty ideals. every barbie has perfect hair and skin and clothes even by the end of the movie. and yes i guess barbie is supposed to be this "above everything else" sort of divine feminine beauty but is still not representative of most young girls. as hilarious as the line narrator's line about margot robbie is, it sort of knows itself, that it is showing us the most perfect looking women, but doesn't address it at all beyond a simple joke. honestly what will mattel do beyond this? i imagine people will be more than happy with this movie so they won't have to make any big changes. i mean their "curvy" fashionista isn't close to being fat, and i don't believe they will ever make a barbie that isn't conventionally beautiful... so this movie just sort of gets to say it's about accepting yourself without actual real-life substance if that makes sense? it reminds me of that cartoon of all those diverse yet conventionally attractive models, with diverse people who don't fit those standards standing outside that box looking angrily. what's the point of the film at the end of the day when not addressing all those people left out of the conversation? also made me annoyed that cellulite was still the big thing that barbie was concerned about, like really?? it's a bad example as people are coming to embrace cellulite and it's also relatively easy to hide, i don't think they would have margot robbie have like, idk, dark under eye circles or a double chin,, idk someone say this better than me but the cellulite thing annoyed me (as someone who has loads of it!!)

the plot was BONKERS and i for one don't really care about plot holes or cartoon logic. there were some things that made me overthink about barbie lore and then i thought to myself that it doesn't really matter. the campiness of it is more important. im sure it will deter some people but again i dont mind it being silly in that way as long as it delivers on its messages and themes, which it does to a certain extent

absolutely lost it at the you are kenough shirt, ljadhkglkhd

as i said in a previous post i predicted that it was going to be the mom who was paired with barbie. i loved the idea sm and it was very heartwarming

i CRIED when barbie first sat down and watched the humans around her living their life, she was so overwhelmed by so many emotions and it was such a simple moment of show-dont-tell and man did i weep :))

i LOVED the ken bits and i did feel as though there was a bit too much ken. especially at the end. but at the same time i loved the dance sequence. its hard loving it so much yet wanting it not to have been to prevalent. i felt like it took away from the barbies a bit which goes against the whole point of the movie????

um the barbie's plans of distracting the kens was... i guess reminiscent of all these spy or superhero movies where women use their beguiling nature against men to get the upper hand? like i am woman so i will flirt with man to distract while my team escapes and hooho it works :)) it was slightly different and not overly sexy or about flirting but it still had the same undertone. like really? the best way to get the other barbies out was to continue to conform to patriarchal standards and pump the ken's egos? surely there's a better way? yes the kens are idiots and turning them against each other works but it still felt a bit icky. i guess i just find this trope annoying being like... ok i am being taken advantage of men so i will USE the thing they oppress me for against them,, idk surely surely there's another way.

also America's character's plan of kidnapping the barbies and ... using very true and very valuable feminist lines to snap them out of it felt... weird? like what she was saying was 100% true but taking them out of context and almost using them as one liners made them feel less serious???? like making women "wake up" by just telling them about how the patriarchy takes advantage of them is just... idk. like in real life women who are indoctrinated and truly believe misogynistic things won't just wake up by being told such a line. and i know the barbies are brainwashed to forget their powerful feminist backgrounds so it's not entirely comparable to the women i just mentioned but... idk it felt disingenuous. i did laugh my ass off at the guitar scene but it still had that ickiness attached like..

i would watch this movie again, no doubt about it and i will definitely pick up on new things and easter eggs etc

mattel's board did make me laugh, perfectly casted and performed but again- mattel has its name on this. they know what they are doing. they know we will love this movie and not demand any change. it will still be full of men controlling the output of production. it will still put out products that don't reflect all young people's desires. it will still make products that uphold current societal norms. so having these buffoons in the board meeting just gets soured a bit when knowing these people will still be in power in real life....

the ruth bit made me cry and no i do not care that her ghost is just around. i loved it

the marketing team knows exactly what they are doing. the huge push of promotion made me gobble up all their interviews and im sure people will be buying all the barbie products. i am yet another victim of capitalism and i will thank them for it when i inevitably buy their you are kenough sweater

again i loved this movie despite all the bad things abt it. i love being critical of the wider impact of this movie while still enoying it as a piece of media and entertainment. i needed this movie and fuck it i want to go to barbieland so bad. i know i shouldnt. i love ken and think about ken more than i do barbie which is fucked up but the movie also played into it in a way,, as described before. i mean even ryan gosling being so iconic in all the interviews is adding into this lol. how many people are posting videos of him vs videos of the actresses i wonder.

also cockring ken. BUT HE WASNT WEARING THE COCKRING SO WHATS THE POINT EVEN???

the narrator was an interesting choice, personally wasn't a huge fan of it but it did somewhat fit with the rest of the cinematic language of the story so i can't say much about it

mattel knows exactly what its doing with putting its name on this movie. i think greta did a great job despite the constraints that mattel probably put on her,, it's hard to tell if the flaws of the movie come from the corporation's infuence or from the writer and director's creative decisions, most likely it's a combo of both. again i believe that the actors and designers and production team did a fantastic job with what they had, they committed to the bit. i would have loved for the movie to have been better, but it is still a great film in my book. as said before i would watch it again and would still enjoy it despite the flaws. the himbo part of my brain can shake hands with the media literacy one and emerge with an overall positive experience, yet PLEASE do not think this is the ultimate feminist movie, it is a step in the right direction, it could have been better, and i understand if you don't like it at all. but also i dont think it would be right to blindingly love it and call it perfect bc it's not.

I’m sorry, how is Killers Of The Flower Moon racist? I saw your tags on a gifset of Lily Gladstone as Mollie and was confused.

youre totally fine, dw! first disclaimer is ive not seen it, but also i dont plan to. i cant vouch for how racist the actual narrative within the movie, for me its more that its situated in a media landscape of films where i saw it advertised and i said to myself "oh i know exactly what that is :/ i thought we were done with this but i guess not"

theres a lot of stuff that i can ramble abt bc its very interesting and theres a million different ways this all plays out even if it all comes from the same source of anti-native thinking. but in particular w this movie its that i know it was gonna be trauma porn possibly mixed with imperialist nostalgia (aka mourning the loss of us/our culture even while actively killing and oppressing us)

there was a really good article i saw a while ago and shared some of the quotes from that talks about this movie specifically! i wont just repost the quotes i pulled before, but in particular for thinking of this movie and not movies in general:

I am not from the Osage community. The response from the tribe about the film, which looks at the events surrounding the deaths of more than 60 Osage people in Oklahoma in the 1960s, has been relatively favorable: many believe that this is a story that should be told, that it will raise awareness and do some good. I hope they are right. I hope something good comes out of this film. I hope the Natives who worked on it continue to have thriving careers and have the opportunity to make better stories for future generations. That doesn't change the fact that I walked into the cinema knowing that I was about to view several rich white men's interpretations of a violent chapter in Native history.

"Killers of the Flower Moon" opens up with a preface by Scorsese, who talks about how he's been wanting to make this film for a long time. He calls the project "proper and authentic." I am reminded of "The Revenant" and how it was praised for its authenticity and "respect." Authenticity is a euphemism non-Native filmmakers use for what Natives call "trauma porn." They think showing the absolute worst of what happened to us in grisly detail is somehow respecting us. The Osage in this film are described by Robert De Niro's character as "sickly people" whose time will run out. And sure enough, the first 30 minutes of film is a collage of dead Natives. As the film continues, hour after hour after hour, more Native men and women are killed off. [descriptions of various grisly deaths depicted in the movie.] Other than [one character being seen serenely walking into the afterlife], there is no moment of healing and catharsis for the Natives in the audience. Our wounds are reopened and left festering for the entertainment and "education" of non-Native viewers.

the full article is really good and i recommend it esp since its a relatively short read, and it really sums up how i felt seeing this movie being advertised and how im sure a lot of native people felt about it U_U

tldr generally is i cant say if the movie itself is like, terribly racist, but at the least it exists in a landscape where non-native media makers continue to find excuses to show native people being brutalized over and over again all while getting to say its because they "care so much" (if they cared theyd support n uplift native voices telling these stories) & native people are all aware of it and pretty much tired of it. so even the ones that may be doing good are, for many people (like my cynical ass lol), beyond the benefit of the doubt and at best are racist out of ignorance of the legacy theyre contributing to

hiyaaa would you care to share some kobra thoughts cause im thinking about him again

(aka: in the process of dying my hair and have to wait for an hour :/)

YESSSSS OKAY-

oh my god i just wrote like four paragraphs that i realized were basically just a summary of shut talked abt in the next ttid chapter since that chapter 90% just Kobra Kid Thoughts atm soooo this is take two with lighter shit that Isnt just basically spoilers lmao

- he has heterochromia, one eye's green and the others brown (dont ask me which is which i have it written down somewhere but i dont remember rn 😭) this fact is very important to me and is something i gotta bring up when i go back and edit past ttid chapters

- he looooves old karate movies, an obsession which was sparked very early on in his time in the zones. the doc has a collection of old tapes and shit, one of which was the karate kid! yk thing abt how every transmasc has a dude from an 80s movie that they wanna steal the gender of?? yeah. kobra's is danny larusso

- one of the few things thats consistent between pretty much all versions of kobra's story in my head is that, a few months after he gets out to the zones he and poison get into a huge fight that causes them to part ways for a 1-2 year period

- its during that ^ year when kobra finds his bike in what he thinks is an abandoned warehouse. it is Not Abandoned but it's fine. i mean, if those other guys really wanted to keep their bike, they wouldve put up more of a fight right? kobra certainly wouldn't have stopped after a few broken bones if he were in their position anyways

- ZERO self preservation instincts. he absolutely thinks he can win every single fight he gets into, which lead him to picking fights with people either a lot bigger than him or a lot more skilled and it doesnt always end well!

-this also extends to animals but in a sort of opposite way. this fucking dumbass will just pick up any fucking creature to try and pet it bc he thinks if it attacks him hell be able to handle it. he does this with snakes a lot in particular- the amount of fucking heart attacks jets had bc he sees kobra just. picking up snakes she was taught to avoid her entire life bc Venom,,,

- i like the idea that hes got a streak of red in his hair to match party's, and party has a blonde streak in theirs to match his :]

- the venom siblings also have matching snake tattoos that wrap around one of their arms. they get them a little while after reconciling from that huge fight and year apart and shit- its sort of a reminder that theyre family, even on the days where they have to hold back from killing each other

- jet is kobra's favorite person to go on supply runs with bc he thinks shes the one out of the crew with the best music taste (second to him of course) and theyre really good at negotiating together bc they are both intimidating in just the right, slightly different ways

- kobra also likes jet a lot bc they know enough abt mechanics to be able to hold a conversation with him, whereas party never has a single clue what hes talking about. and then when ghoul comes along kobra is like "oh okay im in love with you now" bc ghoul actually knows A Lot abt mechanics and bikes and cars and actually maybe he knows more than kobra so kobra's all "yeah okay ur mine now ur gonna talk to me abt bikes for hours rn rn rn" like an excited puppy

- i think kobra is also the more tech savvy of the group. ghoul and jet are old fucking men when it comes to that shit bc theres not a lot of computers in the zones. but kobra was really into technology back in the city, way more than party, so hed the one responsible for hacking the vending machines or dealing with the computers and security shit when they break into bli buildings

- at some point the kid finds an old laptop and that becomes his other project. when theres nothing to work on with his bike, hes trying to get that laptop working. when he does get the laptop working, he finds a bunch of old 2000s era memes saved onto it that he ends up referencing constantly despite not knowing what the fuck theyre talking about (im like 90% sure i got this idea from a fic or something i read *years* ago but idk what it was and i havent been able to find it so someone plz lmk if any of that sounds familiar 💀)

YOU HAVE NO FUVKJN CLUE WHAT KIND OF SHIT LEONARDO HAMATO DOES TO ME. GODDAMN. theres a reason im obsessed w this boy and those reasons are Many. hes just like every other leo if they got a moment to be a person and it drive me fuckin nuts. bonkers, even. hes still analytical he still cares with all his heart hed still do anything to keep them safe and hell still do it alone he still cares about tradition and the status quo and he refuses to show that he cares both because he doesnt want to break that status quo as hes not the eldest anymore and because he doesnt want to stop being able to be carefree and happy. but hes still made up of a leader (he still wears red beneath his blue, a mask that doesnt hide a thing-and the leader wears red, doesnt he, doesnt he?) and god, hed still do anything to keep them safe. hes still the head, and the legacy, and. karai. you are not alone. and yet, both her and leo, they readily threw themselves into a prison that they thought theyd never escape from. no one is alone. except for them. because they have to, this is their duty, this is their comeuppance, they have to be a hero, they have to be the savior. and leos closeness with karai and. and when they leave karai and then when they leave raph, both times, he has to be dragged away. and he locks himself in a prison dimension. and hes calling casey 'case' by the end of the movie, and his supposed last words to him are to say hes proud. and hes so bright and kind and annoying. and. theres just. god theres so much i could say about leo. i use jokes to cope, with my last breath i told you so, hero moves are totally your style, youve been portal chopped. and he only cries in the prison dimension. the moment that portal opens he stops. and he doesnt say a thing between youve been portal chopped and. and, 'took you guys long enough'. like he knew theyd save him. and mikeys portals were a miracle. and he left a katana there. and its a belief of mine that, afterwards, hes more subdued and careful and out of the way. its not about me. and maybe he pushes that too far. and maybe, hes always worked hard to keep his hurt from them, so they dont have to bother with it. mikey needs more help, donnie is more sickly, raph is trying so hard. that last thought was off the hook idk abt that one yet dont take it too seriously. but anyways i think a lot abt him and caseys relationship too. the gentle carefulness that could bloom there alongside bright burning youth and love and hope. and casey was their final stand, and he did it. and he told him, i dont wanna lose you again. and like..just. leos everything. the masks he hides behind and the person underneath and how its clear he cares and..leo is the soul. mikey is the heart and donnie is the mind and raph is the body and leo is the soul. tuning the background noise and guiding them, quiet or loud, whatever he needs to be. and just..the way he always quietly led them and his smarts and how he got to be someone and how he still tries to throw that away and how clear it is he doesnt care for himself the way he does others and how that reflects in future leo concepts and how much I know he would care for this younger versions of himself and. and how bright he is, how annoying yet loveable and so, so interesting he is. this was so scrambled but idc i love him so much. if you want more of my coherent leo thoughts point a thing out this was summary and i DO have SO many thoughts on the prison dimension as a whole (four poems actually), casey and leos relationship (a whole post and then a much larger section in a doc), the peepaw and leo (again A WHOLE DOC for peepaw concepts), and general analysis on the boy (yet again a whole doc). also sorry if this was a bit much lmao he means a lot 2 me

DHDHDJD HOLY SHIT THIS IS A LOT /POS

LMAOOO WE CAN TELL WHO YA FAVORITE IS /LH BUT THIS IS SO DJJDJFDJDJD SO DETAILED AND JUST ❤️❤️

Alright quick question..we have similar taste in fictional men and I’ve never watched Bleach before should I start it so I can obsess over Mayuri as well?

HMMMMMMMAH rly hard to tell. Ok sorry bleach fans i love u but im gonna shit talk this show a bit. Pls dont read if u cant handle me rambling abt my personal experience w a show meant for 15 year old boys. I actually love it deeply !!!!!!! I enjoy ir a lot!!!!! However. I really struggle w watching the show sometimes. Its over 300 eps + the movies which i havent even gotten started with. It's difficult bc theres a lot of cool moments too but good lird esp at tge start the fights consist of characters deciding that they have more soul power bc of some memory they had and beatinh eachother. Everyone is confident there is character variety but everyone is like supposed 2 be a huge badass and idk thats just not my type of media (which is why orihime is actually one of my favourite characters bc she stands in such contrast w her confidence issues and damseliness. Also Ishida i love Ishida i love his arc in the umm when they had the bounts and his self reflection about his inabilitu to help the others + hes always rly analytical in fights. Mayuri too bcs all of his power comes from thinking & experimenrting & PREPARADNESS. I dont remember him ever mentioning soul power bc hes like only talking about technique. Zaraki is also incrhesting bc he is overpowered, but to a point of ridiculousness and where he has an one punch man styled conflict w being unable 2 find someone he has fun fightinh w) i like casts full of losers and freaks. Talking of freaks Tite Kubo is one and will NOT stop making fucked up jokes, esp about girls. His humour is shit theres been like. One scene where i laughed out loud and it was bc ichigos dad pelted him w no mercy bc hes used 2 him being able to fight but ichigo was just tired and he flew thru the room thats fr the only time ive laughed. Theres a lot of rly dark topics also treated very lightly, including when it comes to Mayuri??? Esp his treatment of Nemu. As far as ive seen!!! The storyline has an interesting end in the manga tho and like it seems more thoughtful but ive yet to see that. But the treatment of Nemu as a prop to show how awful Mayuri is and to also be fanservice rly. It frusturates me. Theres so much like, interesting stuff you could do w her character. Again tho im at ep like 180 so maybe there will be!!!! For the good tho Tite Kubo has just. Theeee most incredible eye for character design in my eyes hes so fuckinh good its ridiculous. Even a lot of the side characters are mega memorable and its no wonder a lot of thr characters are absolutely iconic. Also the show definetly gets better the beginninh is just so. Slow. As u can prolly pick up from my earlier notes there are a couple characters that i fuxking loooove aside from Mayuri. As for mayuri he is fuckinh viile and they make some gross jokes abt him too but he is so. Ill b real hes just sexy and also transformation coded so. Literally childhood fave chinhands emoji idc. There also are some great interactions between characters!!! Thr main characters rly care abt eachothef and are so devoted 2 taking care of eachother and i think thats lovely. They can be cranky and mean but theyre always worried for eachother and rwady to help and i think thats just so sweet i like that dynamic. Sorry i di have more to say abt the show as u can see i have some big big emotions abt it and i care abt iy sm but it also often frusturates me deeply a lot of tje time. Its a show you endure. Thank god it jas a dub bc i am watcjing it while knitting / drawing etc.

i cant even lie to u bald avery has become such a problem 4 me (/POS!!!!) i was doing one of my semifrequent rereads of paperteeth i do when i need a grasp on how 2 write their characters again nd i got whiplash seeing normal avery. my ass is NOT ready 2 perceive her usual form again on thursday (if ur updating that is!! pls do not feel pressured,,,)

do u perchance have any spare lore about avery (that isnt in blatant spoiler territory ofc),,,i dotn have any specific questions 2 help but i miss her. avtually i lied ive thought of one (1)

does she. does she paint her claws black or are they just Like That. the mental image of avery potentially just sitting there with a bottle of vantablack nail polish casually painting fuckign. CLAWS is so funny 2 me

I cant stop balding her its a problem like i think she needs to be baldified at some point bc i need her to exist in that form officially. ( i will i definitely wanna try stick to updating these next few weeks, bc of reasons )

avery lore.... im still pretty bad at thinking of things 2 mention unless asked direct questions but here are some extremely mundane things:

she can drive but she doesnt have a car. thats really boring. uh. lore. avery facts. all of her cutlery is silver, all her knives are silver, pretty much anything metal she owns is silver, same goes for her entire family so interacting with them, ever is gonna be a pain. (avery adopts gloves pretty quickly 2 be able to touch silver. and not get got by it (scarlet also does this quite often, u can see her wearing gloves in her introduction)) she doesnt have her ears pierced and now cant, because itd close up / reject immediately. (doesnt have them pierced bc she was always nervous about people ripping them out but more importantly just wouldnt be interested in wearing earrings) these are all really mundane facts. alive she was pretty neurotic about staying healthy (not bc she cares abt it for the sake of her wellbeing just parental influence 2 b perfect form 4 vampire murder always as long as possible) but she drinks a little more than she'd like to admit. (alcohol, not blood, though she drinks more blood than she'd like to admit, too. I guess. which isnt very much) is a little insecure about her nose crinkle when its pointed out but doesnt think about it outside of that. wears tall shoes so she can feel taller 2 the detriment of her ankles. works out exclusively from home refuses to do so in public spaces. she doesnt have much basic knowledge of subjects outside of tha supernatural... shes a little out of touch with non vampire hunter life, forgets most people actually dont think about vampires very much. after being forced to watch tv or movies she wont admit whether or not she likes something until the person she watched it with shares their opinion and she will lie accordingly (otherwise embarrassed) likes to be taken care of but wont let anyone take care of her becasue as you can see, shes LIKE THAT. modern day 2023 despite being much less pathetic, avery still tosses and turns all night (day) and scarlet has to put some weird asmr roleplay you're a worm and im making you a terrarium to thrive in (whispered) 3+ hour long youtube video in front of her to get any sleep. scarlet would totally make asmr actually. she'd make you're a wooden spork that i'm carving (DIY asmr, soft spoken). averys favourite blood type is A, not bc a for avery just because it tastes better to her. she doesnt know that in canon though. shes very intense about taking agnes to the vet whenever she does anything weird, shes always fine though and avery just gets got with vet bills. she found her in the bin. bin cat. meow. did i say that before? i think mightve sorry if that isnt fresh lore. avery & scarlet miss being warm it rly sucks being cold all the time. like. obviously. but like damn. that must suck, I hate being cold.

anyway I could go on.

the claws r naturally black but tbh she should paint them different colours 2 cope with the despair. theyre so inconvenient. she needs some kinda positive association with them. she has to custom order gloves to cover them up, cant just buy normal gloves bc the claws just. go through. they need to have a little point for her claws like little finger scabbards (she doesnt have claws on her feet but her toenails r also black 2 match. no reason other than i think itd look weird if they didnt. no intention of drawing her without socks on though so it doesnt matter-thats some lore.... other lore, the discoloured hands (like the greyness in some drawings i've posted) is a thing on its own aside from the claws, and does go away, but the claws are permanent. i think i said that though.

hiiihihihihi hiii youuuu simmy my beloved loml you i juuust watched howl's moving castle for the first time tday (ik appalling srry) but the entire tim i was thinkinng abt you my beloved and now i want to know abt yr r/s au <33 as much details as you dont mind saying pls <333 bc i was thinking like it would actually!! work sooo well for them ike r being not that conventionally attractive , and growing old w/a big nose while s still finds him just soooo pretty and also being dramatically vian himself AND swallowing! a STAR! and having a heavy heart that belongs to remus like itys sooooo it fits sooo well, but Also howl being a welshman is making me think it could work either way too! esp w/the turning into a crow thing paralleling werewolf tranforms and sirius instead being the son of a mother who would sell him out like sophie im!!!!!! i also know yr basing the au sorta on the book so im wondering which roles ud see fit instead! but aah im just my brain is so abuzz im so excited for whatever u plan to do however u plan to do it! this got wayy too long srry love u MWAH

LAYLA OMG!! firstly hi hi hi hello love <33 SECOND YOU WATCHED IT!!! ahhh having a little party in celebration also tell me everything what did you think??? (i'm running into your inbox right now just so you know!) and you thought of me…literally handing you my heart on a silver platter!! MWAH yours forever <333

also okay the au… (under the cut because minor spoilers and also this is so fucking long)

it definitely started as like taking direct inspiration from the book with a few nods to the movie (like the walking on air scene because obviously) but it’s evolved a lot in the past months mostly because i felt that my sophie-remus wasn’t remus enough and needed a more remus-like journey and destination in the story (not sure any of this will make sense with absolutely no context about what i’ve actually written), and then adapting the story to fit r/s more in tone (i.e the war, queerness, rejection from society etc) i got carried away and things have expanded a lot. i would still say a lot more book inspiration than movie, stuff like michael's character (rather than markl) and the minor details that the movie brushed over, like sophie’s sisters & fanny & the ben sullivan+prince justin story line, i’ve kept from the book but there are definitely some things that i knew i would change that directly contradict:

firstly and the MOST crucial detail for me, remus isn’t secretly pretty all along!! like this is the thesis of the entire au actually, it’s not an ugly duckling arc! he doesn’t break the curse to be young and beautiful again but with more self-confidence, he’s just not conventionally attractive full stop. he’s plain if not ‘ugly’ and in no way particularly impressive, he’s only 18 and hasn’t even allowed himself the space to start figuring shit out. sirius falls in love with him while he’s old with no knowledge of what remus really looks like because knowing that appearance just wasn’t even a factor in s desiring and falling for him revolutionises remus’s view of himself and his assumptions about who sirius is and also…

sirius as howl is not really that vain! this might be a spoiler, but i'd say one of the big theme’s in the au is that everyone is lying and no-one is who they appear to be and/or especially who they SAY they are and it’s remus’s assumption that sirius cares a lot about looks and would only fall in love with someone equally beautiful. howl’s vanity & concern for his looks makes sense for book howl and that story, but i wanted them to be more r/s than howl and sophie so in the au sirius’s flashy clothes and hours spent in the bathroom are more about self-expression, queerness and non-conformity, the contrast of remus struggling with otherness, not fitting in and his failed masculinity (poor baby is too sickly for the draft :/ ) and sirius being so extravagant, rocking the boat, rejecting expectations for his masculinity and flourishing—as in he literally builds a moving castle and lives on the fringes doing whatever he likes and running from/against authority (also should mention the working title for the au is 'Sirius Black’s Moving Castle for Misfits and Runaway Curse Victims').

in terms of roles i do feel like sirius is the natural howl but i did consider what r as howl would be like, i think there is something to work off with howl’s insecurity and one BIG trait being a slither-outer and a coward…very r if you ask me, but at the end of the day i don't think sirius as sophie works and remus-howl would change his character and role in the story by a lot to make it fit...

like howl’s personality by itself is sort of neither r nor s, there are similar and contradicting traits, the vanity and cowardice being the most un-sirius but (maybe a spoiler here) even in the book it’s up for interpretation how much these traits are really howl or instead a symptom of lacking a heart or even a deliberate front. so it was quite an easy adjustment in terms of sirius doing the same howl actions but with slightly different more sirius-like motivations, whereas for R as howl i don’t think you could get him to act the same way.

not sure that makes sense but i think the howl-sirius parallel works because his role in the story is much much more suited to S, like you could write an R-howl playing up the insecurity and the slither-outer trait but to me there isn’t really a story there, like where would it go…because howl is already very comfortable in his position outside polite society: he breaks convention ostentatiously, relishes in mainstream disapproval for standing out and enjoys and actively encourages his terrible reputation (for heart-eating, draft-dodging and other failings in his character). once you give reason for the apparent vanity and cowardice, howl as the prodigy who couldn’t care less about living up to expectations is perfect for sirius.

the thing about sophie's step-mother is that both dwj and miyazaki refuse to write antagonists without nuance, there isn't a clear villain like you WILL empathise with everybody—and with sophie’s step-mother especially, she’s worse in the book until she’s not! despite sophie being so lonely and unhappy at home, the story is about overcoming her own fatalistic worldview and internal feelings of worthlessness & inadequacy rather than an external battle. her family especially her sisters care a lot about her and do want the best for her even if it’s sometimes misguided but sophie has to learn to stand up for herself and stop putting everyone else first (hello martyr complex). AND there's a lot of repression (which goes to remus like water to a fish), even allowing herself to want things out of life, like it literally takes her being cursed to be an old woman and being so ashamed of her predicament and having no other choice for her to finally leave her suffocating home because she is so afraid of challenging the world head on (which is sort of antithetical to sirius).

so yeah then with sophie-sirius not working… like it’s possible to write her family and the hat shop to imitate the blacks but the problem for me is the characters themselves are basically opposites so you’d have to abandon one entirely and it would either be a completely different story to hmc or a completely different character to sirius… (also talking about the characters i mean book howl and sophie but i honestly can’t remember what’s different/missing in the movie??)

and really remus was ALWAYS the perfect sophie to me like in the wip he’s certain that in failing to be a strong, healthy, beautiful perfect specimen of a young man who can fight for the country, instead being sick, unattractive + the nebulous but undeniable fact of his queerness means there’s some innate monstrosity or wrongness about him, and being rejected by his peers has confirmed it, so he represses, withering away hiding in the dark and it’s a mixture of thinking ‘there is nothing better out there nor am i capable or deserving of any better, this is my lot in life and i’ll make do’ that keeps him there. UNTIL he’s forced to leave and comes across sirius who has made a life for himself on his own terms and on the outside seems to have everything: beauty, talent, confidence, freedom but is very flamboyantly throwing people’s admiration & acceptance (everything that remus covets) back in their faces.

in the story sophie is quite resentful of howl in a similar way remus is of sirius (here and in canon i think) and like sophie, he ‘knows’ that he’s a nobody with no future and just expects to fail. also the hat shop is much more remus’s natural environment, exhibit service worker R: ‘he was little more than a puppet in grey felt—marionette strings binding him tightly to the shop, a little flimsy and worn through in places from dancing around for customers all day long. A walking, talking, hat-fetching piece of furniture.’

sooo those are my thoughts on the casting obviously just my opinion and personal thoughts on r/s. oh and the turning into the crow thing and being corrupted by magic, it wasn’t in the book but i have incorporated it only with a different character…and someone turns into a dog also not sirius...other quick points about the wip: peter has a big part in this might be obvious who as but he’s so fun in this one, petunia is also a sympathetic character, Hope is long dead (as per), Lyall dies in the first few sentences and Andromeda has more lines than James i think. i didn’t use the whole multi-verse plot line from the book, we’re in an approximate uk somewhere between 1910s and 40s but it’s more a vibe than a time period because magic and wizards are well integrated with the culture, politics and technology etc, Market Chipping & The Waste are in the Scottish highlands (so Scottish Remus and Lily), Sirius is not from Wales unfortunately but someone does live there (also if ur interested in the book i would highly recommend listening to the audiobook to get the full of effect of Howl’s accent). and the star swallowing/giving away his heart!! it's a major plot point so i won’t say too much about that but THAT SCENE….the one with howl in the field with the shooting stars!! yeah i’m so so excited about it, it’s sooo fitting for what i have planned and only another reason why sirius just couldn’t NOT be howl!

gimli for the ask game!! :D and aragorn!

tysm ash!!!! 🥰🌳🦊

gimli ❤️❤️

Sexuality Headcanon: not sure except mlm as far as the label can be applied🫶

Gender Headcanon: dwarf gender is so difficult to pin down just like elf gender…i was thinking that maybe for dwarves gender & profession go hand in hand… they dont really care much for it in relation to the body but much more in relation to a craft… its the closest they get to the human concept of gender. king is a gender. miner is a gender. bard is a gender, poet is a gender etc. and yes. i think gimlis gender is poet. not that that means he ONLY does poetry. its just what he feels closest to

A ship I have with said character: legolas of course forever and always💗 also as a silly one time thing eomer!!! they have really good chemistry i think. idk if anything actually happend but the mutual attraction was there!

A BROTP I have with said character: eowyn and gimli having a fun silly conversation in the movies is one of my favorite parts !! the movies use it of course to mock gimli/dwarves in general but i see the potential!!! also him and galadriel!!! and him and the hobbits/esp merry and pippin and him and aragorn etc etc hes doing so well!!!

A NOTP I have with said character: hmm i actually rarely see him with anyone else but legolas…gimli fans just understand

A random headcanon: hes sort of a jack of all trades. hes intelligent so he can easily pick things up by watching someone else do it and copying them/listening to very clear instructions . theres a lot of things hes kinda good at 🫶 also hes an only child and as his parents where often busy as both their professions involved travel, he spent a lot of time with his uncle oin and his two aunts (his mothers sister and her wife) <3 also he, kili, and fiii were really close and as a call back to an old post of mine abt dwarven outside names, i think they all picked thwm out together with the matching -li endings. argh ☹️

General Opinion over said character: I LOVE HIM!!!! hes so very special to me and one of THE characters of all time!!!!! hes just right there in the text ready to give his love to everything and joyfully tell everyone about it!!!! his swag? enormous. his prose? unbeatable. i love him ❤️

aragorn ‼️

Sexuality Headcanon: hmm…maybe he had an experience with a guy in his youth 🤔 he did get around a lot‼️

Gender Headcanon: if you selected the concept of "guy" in photoshop and then pressed an arrow key to move it the slightest thing to the left. hes almost 100 and 1) being that old 2) traveling that much 3) having been raised by elves with their whole thing makes it impossible to be 100% gender conforming human masculinty standard following guy. there is gnc energy. he and arwen can share a wardrobe as a treat

A ship I have with said character: he and arwen are…interesting. how happy they are im not sure. being a king is very lonely no matter what. being a queen is also lonely no matter what and especially when your whole family has just left your existance forever… no lets just be silly and happy again. arwen and aragorn can be a weird swinger couple or something idk faramir and eowyn live right over

A BROTP I have with said character: his and gimlis friendship is explored very little in fanon but i think theres potential there. just like with bilbo they could write poetry together :))

A NOTP I have with said character: him and legolas… i almost wrote nobody because to me that pairing doesnt even exist because im so focused on the books 😭 but yeah no its not my thing at all

A random headcanon: i think by the time he went to visit sam and rosie with arwen, i think it was four years after the war of the ring? hes gone fully grey!!

General Opinion over said character: this was hard…i barely think about him!! hes strange and very fluctuating to me - hard to grasp. theres a huge chasm between book aragorn and movie aragorn and im not sure about either of them!