#but some of the things people are trying to justify in my inbox is just telling me they’re an unsafe person to be around | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

thebibliosphere · 1 year

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This is reminding me of rumor that someone mailed Gerard way a physical copy of some pretty gross porn of him and someone related to him - like put that shit in his fucking mailbox

That’s awful. And also sexual harassment. Which is a thing I think a lot of people don’t realize.

It’s absolutely fine to find people you don’t know attractive and explore that attraction in the privacy of your head (and in the case of rpf, behind a filter that warns for explicit content that doesn’t shove it directly in the person’s face).

It’s another to go up to them in a random setting and showcase your most explicit thoughts and expect, what, approval? Reciprocation? Or is it thrill seeking to just get a negative reaction out of the person?

Either way not cool.

#rpf is really not my thing #I avoid it like the plague #but provided you’re not harassing the people involved #I’ma mind my business and keep scrolling #people justifying parasocial relationships however or boundary pushing behavior like this though…#absolutely not #idk maybe working in kink helped me solidify healthy boundaries better #but some of the things people are trying to justify in my inbox is just telling me they’re an unsafe person to be around

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godnectar · 8 months

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Yandere himbo? >:)

・✶ ｡ﾟ𝐘𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐇𝐈𝐌𝐁𝐎 ;

cw: toxic behavior, bae's hot, oblivious and delusional asf, kinda manipulative, jealousy, violence, guilt tripping,,,, justifications + probably a big ass etc. ( inbox )

𖣠 YANDERE HIMBO who possesses a genuinely warm and friendly demeanor that, along with his looks, easily draws people to him. the pure, charming, and easygoing smile he usually wears making it extremely hard for others to suspect anything about his hidden, darker tendencies — reason why you didn't really made a big deal out of his sudden but innocent looking crush towards you and just felt flattered.

𖣠 YANDERE HIMBO whose loyalty absolutely knows no bounds once you two got together after countless of sweet, sincere compliments, some appealing winks, and a few wholesome dates. he's hopelessly devoted to you, willing to go to extreme lengths to ensure his darling's happiness and safety twenty-four seven.

𖣠 YANDERE HIMBO who's cheerful facade is fast to crumble the next second he perceives someone as a threat to your lovely, fairy tale looking relationship, no matter if it's because of one of your friends getting to touchy or just one of your relatives making a disapproving comment about your choice of a partner. even though, he's also quick to apologize whenever you get mad as the familiar, beefy arms that hold you at night get covered with scratches after he holds your acquaintances in a chokehold deep inside an alley hours prior. unsurprisingly, guilt overcomes you as soon as you glance at his pouty lips and furrowed eyebrows, pained by your anger over his instinctive jealousy.

𖣠 YANDERE HIMBO who as much as he lacks intelligence, probably also lacks comprehension for his actions' severity most of the time, leading him to justify some disturbing things such as his hostility, surveillance and obsessive keepsakes by saying it all comes from his undying love towards you, the light of his eyes.

𖣠 YANDERE HIMBO who genuinely thinks there's nothing wrong with what he does. sure, he might not be the brightest bulb in the box, nor the man with the healthiest mental state you'll meet — the latter being pretty noticeable, especially when you catch on the fearful stares some people send among all the praising others unawarely give — but at least he's trying his best at showing you that his... heart throbs only for his sweetling, right?

𖣠 YANDERE HIMBO who desires with all his heart for you to be as head over heels for him as he is for you, never giving up on trying to make you let down all of your guards to share his innermost yearns, fantasizing about an intense, exclusive and unique connection between you two where both seek to become the other's one and only.

"tell me how much you love me, my dear. need to hear you saying there's absolutely no one in your heart but me."

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teaboot · 2 months

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you have some really evil, selfish and toxic ideas irt whos allowed to have friends, you know? i see pop psy people like you all the time making lists of things that are clear and obvious trauma induced behaviour, and then immediately flip to how if you have a friend who ever behaves like this they are evil and need to be cut off, theyre not allowed to have support systems to get better! you really hate bad victims, huh? if someone isn't demure and cowering and self effacing in their symptoms they don't deserve anyone? i got assaulted and when my friend group threw me out on my ass and called me too fucked up for acting erratic and strange in the aftermath and being unable to communicate why they used your posts to justify it. its sick that people like you will look at someone uncontrollably acting out their ptsd and go wow you aren't doing this nice enough to be tolerated! people like you talk so much about compassion but when it comes to people in actual crisis you don't give a shit. no, theyre acting too problematic. just cut them off! no one should help their friends!

original post

Please allow me to take this opportunity to make some things clear.

First, you do not know me. You do not know anything about me. You do not know where I've been, where I'm going, or where I am. All that you believe that you know is extrapolated from information I have volunteered to share. Information that is, by clear and honest choice, edited for both safety and personal security. Remember this.

Second, and I say this in the kindest of ways, because I have had to learn this lesson myself:

Nobody Owes You Shit.

Have you ever saved someone from drowning?

I have.

Do you know that a drowning person struggling to get air will instinctively drag you under them?

It's hard to save people in the water. It takes specific skills and knowledge that not everybody has. Not everyone can save a drowning person without drowning in the process.

The lifeguard needs energy, and strength, and expertise, and persistence.

The swimmer needs self-restraint, and composure, and the desire to be helped, and the ability to do what they can to facilitate their own rescue.

I believe in kindness, and generosity, and compassion. I believe in trying persistently, and in giving the benefit of the doubt wherever possible. I believe that people are good, and small, and trying. And I believe that I can give all the energy I have inside of me to help someone and still come up short.

So you're drowning? I'm sorry. That must be terrifying. That must be miserable. You must be experiencing the worst moments of your life. I hope someone nearby knows how to help you. I hope they have a raft you can climb into, or a rope for you to grab, or a float you can cling to. I hope things get better. I'll call for help, and give you what I can to get you to shore.

But don't you dare drag me under water and curse me for saving myself.

Now get out of my fucking inbox.

#Negativity cw #I don't owe you my medical history #I don't owe you my personal history #You don't know what kind of person I've been #But I promise that person was not always pleasant #Kindness is a choice #Kindness is a blessing #And blessings can be withheld #It doesn't mean you deserve your pain #But nobody else does either #Yeah it sucks #But what are you going to do now #Nobody can rescue you #So what's the plan

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cybertron-after-dark · 1 month

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I was gonna ask a question but i honestly forgot it 😅 so just tell me something you want to rant about

If you do happen to remember what you were gonna ask feel free to do so, do not worry about spamming my inbox bc I live for that shit.

As for the rant

Transformers Rescue Bots had some of the best, kindest, and most respectful representation of neurodivergence I have ever seen in media and I'm tired of pretending it didn't.

While there are obvious complaints to be made about neurodivergent traits (especially autistic traits) usually being portrayed in media by inhuman characters like aliens or robots, this being a case of both, I feel like thats a pretty negligible sin given just how human the show makes the robots feel. (Also it was like 2011 and we were STRUGGLING for any scraps of rep anyway)

But like. The behaviors all these robots exhibit are all shit that I do that was always deemed unacceptable when I was a kid and seeing it portrayed with the level of kindness and gentleness they do in that show has me fuckin crying a little man. I wish I had actually watched it when I was younger and it was first airing because maybe if I did I would've had an easier time explaining what the hell was going on with my brain a LOT sooner.

Blades being anxious, overly sensitive, and WHOLEHEARTEDLY queer (which they had the absolute unparalleled balls to just casually confirm by having him swoon over "hunky vampires" in one episode and NOBODY commented on it. Fucking iconic) and getting so so deeply invested in the shows and movies he loves that he acts out the roles with enough passion to steel his nerves and completely flourish.

Boulder getting really confused at concepts that are basic and intuitive for most people, but still being so fucking intelligent, and never being made to feel stupid for the mix-ups, as well as just being so wholely, unabashedly in love with the planet he's found himself on, even if he doesn't understand all of it (Also apologizing to inanimate objects when he knocks them over 😭)

Chase being obsessed with rules and law because he NEEDS the structure to not fall apart at the seams, even feeling the need to fabricate a minor crime to justify using the emergency line to get a hold of the firehouse when he can't find the other bots. As well as just fully not understanding comedy (BUT TRYING HIS DAMNEDEST), taking things super literally, and having a lot of trouble with tone and expressions (even though you know just how deeply he feels All The Time).

Heatwave being desperate for attention and recognition, but completely allergic to asking for it. And honestly allergic to showing any genuine emotional responses other than aggression. The constant sarcasm and sass and defensiveness that he POORLY maintains because everyone knows that underneath that tough guy front is the loneliest robot on earth that wants to be loved SO bad but would rather jump into unicron's mouth than voice it because if he lets his guard down who knows what will happen to him or the people he cares about.

Just. All of it man. Seeing them exhibiting all these behaviors and quirks that all too often get met with poor reactions from people who don't want to deal with what they don't really get, but here they're met with patience and understanding?? It's got me fucked up. They get to be functional adults that struggle with what they have going on but still push through. They get to have unconditionally loving relationships with people that treat them with respect. And that's the kind of shit that gives me a lot of hope for folks like me because maybe some neurotypical kids that watched it picked up on what's helpful when their friend who acts like one of the bots is going through it. And maybe some neurodivergent kids watched it too and for the first time they just felt SEEN.

Okay rant over, I'm gonna go cry over some plastic robots 👍

#post written while ugly sobbing a little #rescue bots was written with this complete and utter kindness baked into it #as much as i praise the show for the comedy and character aspects #which are still wonderful in their own right #it must not be understated how genuine and sweet and compassionate the writing is #the funny little flash animated robot show did more research than sia ever did with her shitshow hatecrime of a movie #maccadam #transformers #rescue bots

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anamericangirl · 4 months

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The pro death side keeps saying "Abortion is a woman's right! Abortion is a woman's right!" Have you ever heard any explanations as to why they consider abortion to be a right? Or what they believe constitutes something as a right? If you have then I would be interested in hearing, I'd like to understand their reasoning. Personally I just see it as a nothing-excuse for "I deserve an abortion because I want one!"

I have a degree in philosophy and I study law so being involved with legal philosophy I'm quite familiar with what a right is. A right exists as either an entitlement to have something or as an authority over somebody. I can't see how an abortion could be justified on those grounds though. Rights are intrinsic because they are given to us by God our Creator and everyone has equal rights. Where do pro deathers get the idea then that God gives all women the right to kill their children? Does the right always exist with a female or is the right gained once a girl has fully matured into a woman and is thus able to bear children? I have the impression that pro deathers believe rights are ultimately given to us by the legislature and anything can be made into a right if we want it to be.

Sorry for the late response I'm not sure how I missed this in my inbox but I somehow did!

I actually haven't heard any of them explain what they think a right is or what makes something a right, they just scream the line because it's one of the talking points. The closest thing I've ever gotten from any of them when asking what makes abortion a right is just because the Supreme Court had decided it was one. So legally it's a constitutional right. Even though that's been overturned now they still claim it's a right but I've yet to hear any of them try to articulate what a right is and how abortion fits the definition.

And I think like with most things they talk about, they simply do not know. They have no idea what rights are and they ignore and dismiss actual fundamental human rights because bodily autonomy is a right. Abortion is a right! Ok but so is the right to life? But for some reason that right doesn't matter to them. And it seems like it should if their main line for abortion is "it's a right!" They act like being a right is the most important thing but strange how there's only one right they act that way about.

"You must allow me to kill my child because it's a right!"

"What about your child's rights?"

"You must allow me to kill my child because it's a right!"

I'm convinced they 100% do not know what they are saying.

I think you've pretty much hit the nail on the head "I deserve an abortion because I want one." From the way they talk I think they think rights are defined by what they personally want. Abortion? It's a right because they want it. And that's as deep as it goes for them. It's a completely selfish ideology from beginning to end. It's an ideology where you have two people and one gets all the rights and the other person gets none.

They don't know what rights are and they don't actually care. They just use the line because they think it will get them what they want.

#answered

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obsessivevoidkitten · 4 months

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Ok first of all, let me address this. I wasn’t being disrespectful when I said “fucked up stories.” It was a theory.

Second of all, I don’t need your followers insulting me when I never insulted them.

Third of all, you’re still trying to justify that it’s okay to write about rape which is what I’m trying to point out, that’s not okay.

Fourth of all, Most of the people who are defending you are only doing it because they don’t realize how disgusting that is and could possibly fetishize these writings which is what I’m trying to say.

Fifthly, I don’t need you calling me an asshole when I never called you out of your name!! I’m trying to be respectful when you’re just insulting me with no valid respond.

Sixth, I don’t need your followers saying anything about me because of their opinion!! I’m not speaking to them I’m speaking to you.

Seventh, it was just a theory when I said you could be lying about being sexually assaulted, I’m not accusing you of it. But a lot of men and women fake such things so I did include that not to make you angry, but I pointed it out because it is very a common occurrence that happens.

Have a good day, and I don’t need anymore insults im asking for a response??

Maybe don't be an asshole and you won't get called one?

You made a public inbox submission so of course people can respond publicly. It's insane to think otherwise.

Espousing a theory that someone is faking sexual assault is abhorrent unless you have evidence that can prove it.

I just love that you are ignoring my response and pretending that I didn't give one. I gave you a very clear response. Anyone, regardless of whether or not they have been assaulted, can engage with reading or writing rape fantasy content. It doesn't hurt anyone! It doesnt cause people to become rapists or put themselves in a position to be rape. It isn't morally wrong. Get over it.

There was a larger and more recent study than the one in the article I linked to previously. It found, in regard to being forced into a sexual encounter:

61% of self-identified women had fantasized about this before, while 24% said they fantasized about it often.

54% of self-identified men had fantasized about this before, while 11.5% said they fantasized about it often.

68% of non-binary participants had fantasized about this before, while 31% said they fantasized about it often.

Persons with a history of sexual victimization were more likely to report forced sex fantasies. This finding was somewhat surprising to me because it is contradictory to previous research, which found no link between sexual history and forced sex fantasies. However, most studies finding no linkage were based on small college student samples, whereas my sample was larger and more diverse (age range of 18-87). Thus, sampling differences may partly explain the discrepancy. That said, it’s important to note that this association was small, which means that not everyone who has a history of sexual victimization has forced sex fantasies, and that not everyone with these fantasies has a history of victimization. That said, what I suspect is going on here is that forced sex fantasies may be a way that some people with a history of victimization try to take control of a previous experience over which they had no control because, in these fantasies, it is the fantasizer who is in control.

If you don't agree with the science then I guess I am sorry your feelings don't align with research.

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chimggukchim · 5 months

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My Dearest Taekookers

Please don't embarrass yourselves by continuing to try to justify Jimin and Jungkook.

You sound ridiculous when you cry on the timeline saying nonsense like:

It's 'Fanservice' - If it is then why are you all wishing so badly that Tae join in when you heard he's flying out?

HYBE is forcing JK to do this - Yeah...okay...

Jungkook is staying in the house he bought for Taehyung (as a wedding gift) while Jimin is at a hotel. - does this truly sound normal to you lot?!

Taehyung is sad while JK is away.

Why can't Taekook do a travel show together instead? - well, they can but they aren't so DEAL.

And that's just some that I saw. I can only imagine how many more there are.

I know that you all don't deal in reality but let me hit you with some:

Jimin and Jungkook are physically together in Japan right now.

Jimin and Jungkook ARE currently filming content for THEIR travel vlog.

We WILL be getting that travel vlog content in the future and it WILL have Jeon Jungkook and Park Jimin in it. Who knows? Maybe they filmed in Jeju too, when Tae was there and we'll get some quality VMinKook content too.

Jungkook does not hate Jimin, nor does he feel uncomfortable around him. You all may tell yourselves that to COPE, but we ALL know that isn't true, now don't we?

These are FACTS, statements that can be proven to be true with EVIDENCE.

It has nothing to do with whether Jikook are a couple or not. Even if we consider that they are friends and bandmates only, THESE ARE STILL FACTS.

And nothing you tell yourselves to the contrary, changes FACTS.

So please...do yourselves a favour before one of you truly does something you won't be able to take back. Understand that Jimin and Jungkook are part of each other's lives. That will never change. As will the fact that they are very close with Taehyung. Nobody hates anybody in that trio. No matter the hate you spew on social media, those three love each other to death. There is no rule in this world that says if Jungkook loves Jimin, he cannot love Taehyung too. or vice versa. It will never be 'either or' like you lot obviously seem to believe.

Jimin and Jungkook love each other. They love each other as bandmates and as friends. If you all don't believe they also love each other romantically, that's fine. But do not cope by telling yourselves they hate each other, and are forced to be together for 'fanservice'. You sound psychotic given what those three SAY AND DO.

Your sanity should not hinge on whether or not two people are in a relationship.

Because the things I see on the timeline...are you truly so deep in delulu that you not only fail to face facts, but more importantly, are willing to darken your minds and blacken your souls just to prove that two people hate each other?

Think about it.

Sincerely,

A Concerned Observer

PS. Don't bother sending me any hate messages in my inbox. I do not put that nonsense out or give it any kind of publicity.

#taekook #vkook #jikook #kookmin #jungkook #jimin #kim taehyung #bts #bangtan boys #bangtan sonyeondan #park jimin #jeon jungkook #mingguk #taehyung

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disteal · 5 months

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I don’t want to sound self centered with this ask, but I just want to know if you ever feel this way. I’m doing my best to raise up awareness around Palestine, but I always feel guilty injecting my own voice about it. Like I don’t have a right to be taking away time from people who deserve more of a centre stage. But when I’m just reposting tweets and reblogging posts, I feel like such a lazy piece of shit. Like what am I doing, letting all these people who are suffering speak out for me?? Do I not have a role to play in fighting against genocide myself? Is there a balance you strike? Am I just overthinking this?

Ah, yeah. Listen, and I say this gently, I really don’t have the authority to absolve anyone of any guilt they feel around ‘not doing enough’. This feels like something you confessed anonymously in my inbox because you needed to get it off your chest, but knew posting it on main would have opened you up to some justifiable criticism about derailing an important conversation. I feel like a tool for saying that when you’ve been very real w me, but I’m just trying to be honest.

At the moment, the best thing you can do is to keep your vision focused and your language in line with other activists to maintain a united front. This is especially true if you are not Arab or live outside the region. And the most consistent request from those we’re fighting for is to stay angry, and to keep other people angry. There is more you can do other than posting, obviously, but that’s going to depend on where you live and what you’re both capable and willing to do.

But I don’t want to be a dick and leave it there; you’re being very honest and vulnerable here and I empathise. I think a feeling of hopelessness and impotence in activism around Palestine is very common, even amongst organisers. There’s so much pain that you’re flooded with the instinct to do something, and so few avenues to actually tangibly help… it’s awful.

Restriction of aid on this scale hasn’t really been felt by our generations before, especially with how visible the conflict in Palestine is rn. In the past you’ve always been able to do, like, more; send money to a bail fund, assist people fleeing, get someone a warm meal, but Israel has absolutely locked down any and all aid from outside, and that’s being sanctioned by our governments.

This thing you’re feeling, that frustration and embarrassment, it’s not a bad thing. It is embarrassing our leadership have done this, and our collective apathy towards the middle east has allowed it to build for so many years. All this misery, and your own powerlessness, are by design. Turn it outwards from yourself, at the people who are responsible; self-flagellation helps nobody, and there is more we can do. Let the rage and disgust at it all help you find it.

#ask #long post #hope i wasn’t being rude here i rly do feel you dude

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utilitycaster · 1 year

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unpopular opinion: the fanon reframing of Ashton as a protector and level headed confidante instead of a self loathing, insecure mess of a person is not only weird and frustrating but a symptom of the fandom’s deep discomfort with some of the themes Taliesin’s exploring

(As of 8:14 AM EDT today, April 15th: not answering new questions for this meme that come in but answering the ones already in my inbox)

HARD AGREE and frankly it's really weird because like, what, not two months ago the Ashton conversation was about how dare they say they know a loneliness Laudna doesn't and now they're "team level-headed" and it's like where was the turnaround here, because like, we only saw them for two more episodes after that before the party split and neither had them in significant focus. Like, Taliesin straight-up said that Ashton takes his own justified abandonment issues but then gets mad at Laudna for seemingly not having them (and for what it's worth I also think Laudna hasn't dealt with her issues, ie, Ashton is correct and Laudna's saying things are fine when they're not, but also, dick move on Ashton's behalf). He provokes fights with people because then the pain at least means something instead of being just chronic pain that sucks and happens regardless. They see themself as unfixable and distance themself from people so they can't get hurt again.

All of this is pretty fucking ugly and for reasons apparent to anyone looking through my blog at characters I like, "I put up a facade to hide how much I fucking hate myself and I am deeply principled in a way that isn't necessarily aligned with society around me and also murder is okay" is a character type I strongly gravitate towards in fiction, but tends to be polarizing. For some weird reason with Ashton, instead of them having the usual polarization of "people who get it and love them" and "people who hate them for being kind of a bastard" it's more "people who are deliberately trying to paper over how messed up this is."

#answered #Anonymous #cr tag #unpopular opinions ask meme

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mottlemoth · 1 year

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So I’ve been hiding a lot. I’m really sorry. Being back on Tumblr makes me feel like it’s fine to share some of this - I’m sorry if it’s weird to hear - I’m just having a tough time and I need to be honest.

Various things are happening to me in real life at the moment. It’s been one thing after another, and there’s more to come. Usually I turn to fandom for a support structure and an escape from stress, but I’m realising that sense of comfort has been missing from my life for a few weeks now.

I came to OFMD from a small rarepair with a very close and very supportive community. I absolutely wasn’t prepared for the kind of things I’ve experienced in the last few months on Twitter. The OFMD community there has a lot of problems right now, one of the most worrying being a lethal lack of awareness that fan writers are fans. We’re writing for fun, sharing our work for free. But we’re being ripped apart by people who’ve had years of practice at criticising showrunners for creative decisions they don’t approve of. The abuse is largely motivated by jealousy - any author who picks up too much kudos or appears on too many rec lists becomes the next target, and it’s usually cloaked under a false banner of social justice. It’s happening over and over again. It’s transparent and it’s exhausting, and the things being used to justify the abuse are so tenuous that I often can’t believe what my actual eyes are reading. I’ve been accused of misogyny for writing Edward ‘Shoot-The-People-Who-Teased-Me’ Teach as reacting emotionally, therefore “female-coding” him, therefore sexism. I don’t know how to cope in this kind of environment.

I’ve been through endless rounds of coaxing myself to try to relax - to forget about the paranoia and the toxicity, and shut up and get on with writing because I have a duty to finish this fic and everyone’s waiting for the next chapter and if I don’t hurry up and post it then I’ll get Tumblr messages saying “when can we expect the next chapter” and - suddenly I realise, wait. I’m not actually obliged to do any of this.

This is my hobby.

I am 100% allowed to stop doing this at any point I want to.

“But you have a duty to the people who’ve--”

Look, I get that this isn’t something anyone wants to hear, but... no. I don’t. I’m an exhausted thirty-something sitting in her pyjamas after work, having a cry because my hobby somehow turned into a full-time job on top of my already miserable full-time job. AO3 writers don’t have a duty to do what they’re doing. Fanworks are literally a gift of time and energy from a complete stranger. I’d love to be able to ignore the people being abusive towards writers, but I can’t. And, again - this is my hobby. I’m not obliged to ignore the abuse and just get on with the task. If I’m upset, I’m allowed to stop. (Let’s say I joined a knitting club. Let’s say some of the members were routinely vicious and awful to anyone who got “too good” at knitting, and none of the other members ever hit them with any consequences for their behaviour. I don’t have a duty to stick around at Toxic Knitting Club, even if I never finished that pair of socks I started. If the club cares about its own survival, then it needs to make the environment feel safe and welcoming. It can’t just expect people to ignore the nastiness.)

OP, I blanked your name and pfp from this message because I don’t want you to get grief. But I’ve searched for your username in my email inbox, and found that this is the first time you’ve ever spoken to me. You’ve never reached out to chat or be kind or make friends, but you’ve reached out to prod me when you think that I’m being tardy with delivery of your content. Chapters 1 to 43 appeared at least once a week, sometimes twice or even three times a week. Did it cross your mind that maybe there’s a reason why chapter 44 hasn’t dropped yet? Did you think, something must be wrong, maybe I should ask if they’re okay? No, you just came to bang on the vending machine. I’m sorry if this is an uncomfortable lesson to learn, but the writers in your fandom aren’t staff. We’re guests. Tonight, when I get home from work, I have the option to run a long bath, have a cry and play The Sims until I fall asleep, or the option to sit down at my desk and write something for you, even though I might get harassed and bullied for it. You haven’t tipped the scales in the direction you meant to.

I don’t know how to even begin concluding this post.

I’ve been struggling ever since I was dogpiled back in September. I feel very lonely and very tired. Twitter is an awful bloody website and it’s structured around division and argument. I’ve been feeling better since I came back to Tumblr. My breaks at work are now spent scrolling through pretty GIFs or cool meta or funny things about Izzy, rather than drama, and it’s helping. So... I don’t know, OP. Don’t start being like this here. I’m fighting so hard to find reasons to stay in OFMD. Life is rough at the minute, and I want to spend my free time feeling happy and safe with people who see me as a friend, not a vending machine. I’m doing everything a professional writer does, but for no pay, with no protection or support from a publisher, and I’m fitting it around a full-time job. That’s... well, that’s the situation. That’s the situation all your fan writers are in, however well they seem to be handling it. It’d be great if you could reflect on that.

TLDR; this is my hobby, and I work on my hobby when it feels fun.

#personal

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incorrect-riordanverse · 11 months

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Hi. Sorry, if this is anyoing. I find Rick Riordan's portray of some of the gods, and goddess interesting, and like le, not all but some. For exemple I really like Hestia, Horus, Seth, Artemis, Nephthys, Thoth, Bess, Tawaret, Anubis, Apollo, and Hermes (I can't really have an openion about how he portrays the Norse gods, because the Magnus series haven't been translated to my language yet, and buying and ordering books in English here costs a lot of money, so I have to wait (there is a gossip that they will publish it, but they say this sainc at least 3, or 4 years)) . And I have to thank Rick Riordan's books that I got into mythology, and started learning it, and that I new want to write stories based on it, and started watching Overly Sarcastic Productions. But there is a need to criticis how he portray some gods, and goddess, and then there is also a something that both him, other writers, and people who talk about mythologys forget.

One problem is Demeter. She didn't tried to kill everyone, so they give her daughter back, the reason why everything almost died was her sadness. The sadness of the mother when they child gets married is a thing (for both sons, and daughters at least I heard it), which is a somewhat common thing, even if the realetionship of the child, and they partner is healthy. I was at my cusins wedding, and my mother said that she will cry aty wedding. This is because they child, is no longer a child, but an adult. Yes I know that in the story can mean something else, because of it's age. But I still think that "Demeter sadness", would be a lot more better then "Demeter tried to kill everyone, so she can get her daughter back because she is an opsesed mother".

Next problem is Hera. I don't want to excuse her actions, by any means. She married Zeus, because he raped her, and out of shame because of it. And this marriage her only source of pride, and probably a way to try to get rid of the shame she feels. Zeus's affers brings her the feeling of shame back. It gives more deapht, portays Hera more humeanly, and is more acuret to mythology (there is just this one version of this myth). And with good write this could be writen in a way that no justify what she does to Zues's other victoms.

Next problem is Zeus's portray. I think the only thing I have to say, is that Zeus is the only gods who doesn't have any version where he don't rape someone. (the only god who don't raped, or kidnaped anyone in any versions is Ares.)

Next problem there is no cannon, and many myths have many defrent version. This is true for Medusa's origin story. In some versions she was a monster from birth, alongside her sisters, in other version she was once a human. We all know this version but it has two version. One where Poseidon rapes Medusa in Athena's temple, then Athena cursed her to punish her. And in the other older version Medusa consented to the act. And there are many more versions of almost every myth, in all mythologys, and I think this can be interesting thing when it cames to writing stories based on mythologys.

Sorry if I sound stupid, or anyoing, and sorry that this is long. I just wanted to write this for so long. And sorry for the grammar, and spelling mistakes English is not my first language.

TW: mentions of SA, rape.

I completely forgot I had an inbox for a while so idk how long this has been here but I’ve finally got around to it! I find this sort of discourse very interesting, and I agree for the most part with what you’re saying!

I heavily dislike interpretations that villainise Demeter in Persephone and Hades’ story too. Lots of modern retellings do this to romanticise Persephone and Hades, and its quite sad (and frustrating). Demeter freezing the crops is such a powerful story about a mother’s love, and its tragic that its been so twisted in modern retellings of the myth. Web comics like ‘Lore Olympus’ and ‘Punderworld’ come to mind for this, but (and maybe this is because of my ass memory of the series… it’s been a while since I read it) I don’t remember Persephone and Demeter’s story being touched on much in the Riordan’s books. I feel like it may have, but I can’t remember explicitly. I remember Hades and Persephone’s relationship being quite rocky though!

I hear what you’re saying about Hera too! She’s been under a lot of fire recently and I know the PJO series plays a large part in that! I can think of ‘Blood of Zeus’ being another factor in this villainising narrative of her, and even though there were some efforts to make the audience view her as sympathetic in that show, it seemed a little backhanded (overemotional woman blinded with rage and taking it out on the wrong people). I agree that it seemed a bit much to portray her as a villain in the series, but I’ll raise two things:

PJO was a series created with children or young teens as the target audience. so the series can’t be that loyal to the original myth, considering how dark it is.

Hera was a good antagonist, and her values and motives in the series were the most accurate to how the Greek gods actually were at the time. They simply did not view mortals as anywhere close to equals, but tools to bring glory to their names. They looked after them as long as they served their interests. A lot of her ‘hate’ stems from the fandom’s misogyny, I believe. It also doesn’t help that the other Greek gods in the series were reduced to caricatures of what they actually were, such as Ares (mean and violent), Aphrodite (shallow and vain), Hades (cold and distant) and Poseidon (cool swag fish dad ig). In all honesty, I understood Hera’s motives the most and I think she was written pretty well. I don’t understand why the fandom hates her so badly unless it’s misogyny or the fact that she was too good of a villain, and felt like a real threat to the characters (the Greek gods were badass, but super scary!).

However, there was that book that Riordan did write about the Greek gods that no doubt contributed to Hera’s ridiculing (that being ‘Percy Jackson and the Greek Gods’ told in the perspective of Percy). He mentioned Zeus ‘tricking’ Hera into marrying him, but disregarded the seriousness of it and continued to make fun of her. I understand its still a kids book so he couldn’t do much, as well as its in character for Percy to ridicule her, but still… I see why some people get upset at that portrayal of her as well. Especially because Hera has had a long-winded past of being villainised and made fun of for her actions, which all stem from deep-rooted misogyny.

Zeus’ portrayal fits hand-in-hand with Hera’s, to be honest. Riordan couldn’t explicitly show how he actually was, so he omitted some stuff, which was fine. It’s funny you make that point about Ares being the only god who never encroached the boundaries of his lovers, because he’s depicted as a misogynist in the series towards his daughter. Which irks me a lot.

Medua’s depictions are also very contested. I believe, and I don’t know if I’m 100% correct, but I’m pretty sure that in the original Greek myth, Medusa had always been a gorgon, and was never human. The myth of Medusa being raped by Poseidon in Athena’s temple is a Roman adaptation, and I think that story is the more popular interpretation currently. I also think that’s the story Riordan was kind of going with, considering he wrote Medusa in the first book to be in love with Poseidon (and in the original myth they had no sexual relationship). Which is… yeah. Disgusting. Again, not saying that Riordan should’ve strictly stuck to that very graphic interpretation, but he didn’t have to portray her like that. And this could’ve been avoided if he did enough research on more interpretations of the myth.

All in all, I don’t think Riordan was genuinely malicious, just ignorant to the implications his portrayals of the gods would have. There’s also the fact that he probably didn’t know how big of a hit Percy Jackson would be, and how much influence it would have over general media surrounding Greek mythology (mostly Greek mythology, but Norse and Egyptian too!). I wasn’t even aware of how problematic it was until this account started gaining a larger following, and so I also had to do research on the topic myself! There’s an assumption that Greek gods don’t have influence over people today, but there are some out there who worship them, and we shouldn’t dismiss that because its a smaller religion.

Thank you for this ask! You weren’t being annoying at all, I love long asks 🫶🫶

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dross-the-fish · 5 months

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You're always so patient with anons, how do you keep from going off?

Because I know most of the Anons who come into my inbox aren't intentionally being malicious.

Real malice is very rare and there's no way for these anons to know me personally so I usually don't take it personally.

Another thing I've picked up on as I've gotten older. Half the things anons are upset about aren't actually about me or even about the thing they're complaining about.

What do I mean by that? Well, when an anon comes in complaining that I don't like something they like or that the version of a character I prefer doesn't look like their preferred version it's not about me or my interests it's about them. They were probably looking for some kind of validation and when they didn't get it from me they took it as some kind of criticism of their tastes and by extension a criticism of them as a person. A big example is the people who like Erik and can't stand to see people say his behavior towards Christine is toxic. They tend to think any kind of analysis of the text that doesn't paint Erik positively or is critical of reading a romantic relationship into Erik and Christine's interactions is targeted so they feel the need to justify themselves.

Another example is when people call out toxic patterns they see in the fandom or trends that they dislike, you inevitably get backlash from people who feel like they're being personally attacked rather than recognizing that the criticism is general or aimed at content and prevailing mindsets rather than individuals.

That's actually a very human and relatable reaction to have. I'm not above it myself, it's just that as I've gotten older I've learned how to stop and check myself and assess whether my feelings are coming from a sense of personal defensiveness or if I actually feel like there is something that needs to be discussed.

That's not to say I don't get frustrated from time to time or aggravated when I feel like people are projecting things onto my writing and characters that aren't there. Even more so do I get aggravated when I'm directly asked a question but then when I give my honest answer it's treated like I went out of my way to attack part of the fandom, but I know that at it's core very little of that is actually about me, my opinions or my work. It's about people feeling like they're being called out and not being able to handle it.

I find the best way to deal with it is to engage with it patiently and then block or ignore it if it's obvious that I am dealing with bad-faith or malice. Even if the other person isn't showing me their best side, I try to remember that in most cases I'm still talking to a human being who may not actually be trying to hurt me and I try not to take it personally on my end.

That said, if you find yourself in a situation with another user and feel like you're dealing with something that is too much for you or that is testing your comfort then you're within your right to block, step away or protest. I'm not at all advocating that you take someone's abuse.

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little-lee-froggie · 4 months

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So, I just woke up to this in my inbox

(tw, the anon mentions rape and suicide)

So yeah, what the fuck.

I’m sorry if it’s weird to make a post about this just because of one hate message, but I’m not going to let anyone talk to me like that. I’m mostly doing this because of the fact that my post where I said I had made attempts is now pretty far down in my post history because I’ve been somewhat active the past few days, and I just got this message this morning. So either this person scrolled through all my posts just to find one they could use to try and trigger me, or they scroll on the vent tag and will just send people messages like this. Also, a person was tagged, which means either I know exactly who did this, or someone is being framed for saying something like this to me.

(Edit: after talking to the person tagged, they were in fact framed. Please don’t be mad at them, they are a victim in this situation, being framed for things they didn’t do. This anon is the bad guy, the person tagged did nothing wrong, and in the small amount of conversation I had with them, the seem very kind)

If this person just scrolls through the vent tag, people need to be aware that there is someone doing this. Venting on the internet is what keeps some people alive, they don’t have anywhere else to go to. Some people need to vent, and the fact that someone might be trying to use that against us is absolutely disgusting, and if this is the case, people need to know for their own safety.

Who ever did this, I’m not going to sugar coat this, you fucking disgust me. You know nothing about me so you have no right to comment on what I deserve, nor does anyone deserve to be rapped. No one has any right to misgender me or anyone else. You may think you know who I am because you read one vent post by me, but you don’t. You don’t know who I am, and you don’t know me. I can’t be sure that the person they tagged is really them, because if they wanted to say who they were, they would have just not used anon, so I’m hesitant to report the person they tagged, but if anyone knows how to check if it was actually that person, that would be great. But yeah, whoever did this, you have no right to misgender me and say such gross things. You likely are looking for attention, I understand that, attention is important, but saying something like this to a person is not justifiable. You can’t do that. I’m pretty numb to most things, so I’m not personally triggered by this, but someone might be. In the event someone were to actually kill themselves because of an anonymous message you sent, that’s your fault. A person would be dead because of you. Do you understand how fucking terrible that is? Someone could die.

I am going to go have a conversation with the person tagged. I understand that if they were the person who actually sent it that this could just result getting told more things like this, but if they are being framed, they deserve to know. But yeah, that anon has been blocked and I’m going to be turning off anon for a little while

#inbox #hate anon #Tw rape #tw sui talk #hate messages

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my-autism-adhd-blog · 11 months

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About the Autism Moms thing, I also don't get it and it makes me pissed.

I was reading through the comments of an Instagram post about food selectivity in autistic people. The woman who wrote it is autistic herself and has two autistic children and was trying to help other parents help their children who have food selectivity due to sensory issues. Then there was this comment from a woman who said that her autistic son's food selectivity was pissing her off and sometimes she thought about letting him without food at all just to see if he'd decide to start eating normally. And another mom agreed. And like... Wtf???? My own mom actually did this to me when I was a kid (it was only for a day/ some hours, but still so fucked up) and it honestly did not work. I'm 21 and still SUPER selective with food (I was reading about ARFID and makes a lot of sense for me). This thing about trying to starve your child makes no sense at all! I can't even believe people think like that.

Hi there,

My goodness! This was a doozy to read. Having selective food is basically malnutrition. That’s not good. Avoidant Restrictive Food Intake Disorder (ARFD) is pretty common for ND individual because of sensory issues.

For example, I like to eat steak, but I can’t eat the fat. It so…weird in my mouth. But sensory issues doesn’t justify starving kids! If they have an eating problem, they should consult a doctor. Maybe they can help.

My boyfriend has this thing that you should always try eating something at least once to see if you like it. (I hope that makes sense).

Parents can have their child try a selection of foods. And they might like things if they try it. Don’t starve them. That basically abuse. 🥺

I’m going tag @krisrisk and @autistic-af so they can share their thoughts on this if they would like.

Thank you for the inbox. I hope you have a wonderful day/night. ❤️

#inbox #inbox reply #inbox is open

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chaos0pikachu · 6 months

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i'm sorry for jumping into your inbox like this but what bothers me about people going "the show is making a point about how society treats sluts!" when talking about only friends, and boston in particular, is that this point is made (a lot of the time, from what I've seen) in this weird condescending tone, as if the people questioning the narrative and going "hey, what the fuck" are just too stupid to get it, yk

(also, sidenote: if the show was trying to make a point, do a commentary, a critique if you will about how society (even queer society) slut shames and treats nonmonogamy, it failed imo, lmao)

Don't be sorry! I've basically been bothering my penpal about this all day lmao they don't even watch the show but they're feeling my rage today so bother away you're very literally doing them a favor

Personally, and this is me being openly a bitch, I think some folks are just looking for excuses to justify that they're fine with the finale (b/c ppl don't wanna feel guilty about liking something problematic~) or that Jojo isn't a bad writer actually. Which, bro who cares, if you enjoyed the ending dope, I didn't.

I've said this before, but other media has made commentary regarding sex, and slut shaming in ways that hits harder and better. Without doing the office looking into the camera action. I hate when ppl say that we're not fucking stupid like my god I work in a creative industry I understand both how narrative works and how it's literally made. I've SEEN the sausage I've been to the factory front row.

But even without that experience ppl aren't dumb, they can tell when they're being sold something disingenuous. Those takes that "well you just don't see~~ the vision" or "the show doesn't have a message, actually" when Yo was literally monologuing the message for 5mins at the end of the show is hella disingenuous. People also seem to forget that inherent and implicit bias are a thing in all of us, yes even the creators you like.

Also you can't have both, either the show was purposely making commentary regarding how society treats promiscuous people, people who are poly or want open relationships and critiquing that OR the show didn't have a message at all and was totally egalitarian.

If it's the former it failed drastically, I wrote weeks ago that the show was slut shaming Boston, I had a whole draft about how the hypocrisy of the characters wasn't intentional (but it'll stay in the drafts now I don't feel like cleaning it up lol), Boston ended up punished every step of the narrative repeatedly - with Mew blackmailing him, with Gap non-con recording him, with Atom, with Cheum, with the whole friend group, and in the end even Nick left him - with no recourse. With no opposing viewpoint. Nick was the only char who showed Boston a shred of empathy - and even then, he still showed Atom more empathy than he deserved - and in the end that was used up too.

If it's the latter the show still failed b/c the show absolutely had a ton of bias - I've had multiple ppl point out to me that the darker skinned chars are all predators or slutty whores in the show - and dropped storylines that should have been expanded on - Gap has folders upon folders of sex tapes???? Does Boston's privacy not matter?? - that were dropped in favor of further punishing Boston. And when things were supposed to be seen as "bad" the narrative made them clear.

Mew partying was bad, Ray drinking was bad, Boston sleeping around, welp you guessed it.

but yeah, how exhausting tbh all I want post-series is a bunch of Boston fanfic that gives him justice or even some fucking nuance (oh and that playboyy the series is actually good lol)

#only friends the series #chaos pikachu speaks

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zeroducks-2 · 7 months

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Freedom of speech but not freedom from consequences. Anti-censorship but we still don’t want to platform bigots 🫤 Coming from a neutral party, I think you could learn a lot from listening to all perspectives to avoid echo chambers. Form your own opinion instead of following a crowd. My opinion? Hate the person, not the ship. Don’t judge a book by it’s cover, but that is what the book cover is made for. I think it’s healthier if you and everyone else stopped trying to be antagonistic? How are you supposed to spread positivity if you’re always on the verge of angry ranting?

Okay I'm going to try and answer for the sake of the people who might read this kind of bs in their inboxes and be affected negatively by it, and maybe even feel like they're being unfair towards the very bullies which spend their energies harassing and insulting (and sometimes also doxxing and suicide bating) us.

Let's break this down.

1. "freedom of speech but not freedom from consequences" I can't even talk about some dark themes in fiction or my own personal history of real life abuse without getting termed here. Erotic art can't be posted almost anywhere at this point, and not just the kind antis dislike. Freedom is a construct on social media because ultimately these spaces are owned by someone, and you'll be kicked out if they don't like you.

2 "we don't want to platform bigots" no, absolutely we don't. Historically, giving a platform to bigots and hatemongers fosters hate, violence and censorship. Also I have no power to platform or deplatform anyone, I'm just a guy on tumblr, so I don't even know what you're on about with this. If I had the power to decide, trust me that I would kick the terfs the fuck out of here anyways. And also the cowards who hide under the anon cover to send hate and threats.

3 "listen to perspectives and avoid echo chambers" I'm over 30 and I've been a kinkster for most of my life. I'm queer. Among other things, history and queer history are in my field of studies. I didn't form my opinion here, I came here with one already. I listened to all the perspectives you might think of also because I was here when the rise of censorship and puritanism happened, and by the way you know who got deplatformed? The kinkster and the artists, surely not the bigots. I don't think I've ever seen an instance of an anti being blocked or termed for harassment, whereas blogs get blocked every day for having NSFW content.

4 "form your own opinion instead of following a crowd" again, do you really think I existed as a blank slate before creating this blog?

5 "my opinion is(...)" You sound like a Christian preacher and it gives me the heebiejeebies.

6 "it's healthier if you stopped trying to be antagonistic" sweetheart, we are being bullied every day. If you're someone who creates erotic art of any kind you're subjected to a ton of harassment, and if you create something which could be considered problematic, you get death threats. Suibating. Insults lathered with misogyny, transphobia, queerphobia, you get treated like a freak of nature and threatened to have your livelihood taken away. Or threats of doxxing and of deplatforming. And you might very well get your blog shut down. I'm going to stop being antagonistic when I'll stop being antagonized, and if you think that said bullying is justified and I should just suck it up - and I say this in the most antagonistic way possible - fuck off. Not one single ship or one single fictional character is worth the harassment of another human being.

7 "how are you supposed to spread positivity of you're always on the verge of angry ranting" What makes you think I want to spread postivity? No like, honestly. What makes you think that my purpose with this blog is that. I'm here to talk about my blorbos, and if this makes someone happy then good for them. If the fact that I'm opinionated and passionate about things bothers you, no one is forcing you to stay.

Your whole thing is a mix of victim blaming and fake neutrality which is not welcome on my blog. Please block me and go on with your life, I'm not interested in your empty platitudes.

To anyone else who's reading this, don't ever feel guilty for defending yourself and for fighting back against oppressive measures. There is never a good reason for harassment, and if you were subjected to it, it's in your right to be angry. No matter what p r o b l e m a t i c ship you posted about.

#Anon hate #Long post #'hate the person not the ship' dude what the fuck #Dislike the ship and block the tag. Don't fucking hate anyone #Weirdo

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