#but fuck me I'd love to see someone else do it
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‼️NIGHTBRINGER LESSON 38 SPOILERS‼️
masterlist
normal and hard spoilers
enraged and pleading being the lesson opener...
is lucifer putting aside his pride for the sake of his brothers?
my heart can't take this
lucifer never begs. the fact that he's so lost in his rage, his confusion, his grief, this is why satan was born the way he is. lucifer losing control of himself to the point that he puts aside his dignity, his pride, using his power to this extent is something i thought i'd never get to see. and the fact that it's all for his brothers makes it that much more painful
he was fine being bound by chains when it was just him, when everyone else was safe, when he was punished for his actions and endangering and ruining the lives of the ones he loved. as long as his family is safe, he doesn't care what happens to himself. then he saw simeon, luke, mc, mammon, and couldn't reign in his emotions. he couldn't stand the thought of the people he cared about the most suffering because of what he'd done, because of his arrogance and insistence and prideful nature, so much so that his anger at himself, at his father, overrided any sense of pride he had left
he's scared, not for himself, but for his family. he uses his anger to mask his fear, but now the two are blended together so intricately that he can't differentiate the two and is losing himself, hurting the people he wants to protect
another instance of him putting aside his pride. lucifer had been just as insecure about his position at diavolo's side as mephisto had. diavolo saw him at his worst, at his weakest, and devoted himself to diavolo for the sake of his family. he put aside his pride, took on the mantle of what he perceived to be a trophy for the person that saved his life, his brothers' lives, and his sister's life
but the thoughts lingering in the back of his mind blinded him of the fact that diavolo didn't only take pity on him, but he understood and empathize with him, he cares about lucifer more than their fathers ever cared about either of them
diavolo AND lucifer at full power ??? i'd be surprised if the entire underworld didn't collapse in on itself. and if that happens, another war is gonna break out, but this time, it'll be between the celestial realm and the devildom bc they're destroying celestial realm property
if an all out war did happen, i wonder if simeon, raphael, and maybe even luke would all take the devildom's side. they've seen firsthand the evil the celestial realm is capable of, and they probably wouldnt want to be a part of it
GODDDDD IM GONNA CRY
if lucifer cries i might ACTUALLY lose my mind
the only reason he lost control of himself was because he thought he had nothing left to fight for, nothing left to lose, and he didn't care if he died in the process since he didn't have anything or anyone left to live for. but seeing his brothers brought him back to his senses. he lives for them, because of them, and would do anything to keep them from danger, even if the danger is him himself
WHATTHEFUCK THIS IS ONLY THE 2ND PART OF THE LESSON ??????? WHAT IS GOING ONNNNNNNNN
speechless. no words. i just thought i should add this
diavolo KNEELING ???? my god
satan 🥺
my guesses are as good as theirs, honestly. i don't think michael would do something this terrible to his most beloved brother, even after lucifer's betrayal of the realm and refusal. he sent luke and simeon down to check on lucifer for fuck's sake, and he went down himself disguised as raphael to make sure lucifer was ok. to see is he really was happy
maybe it was their father? but the whole forgiveness thing throws that out of the window for me. and it couldn't have been the demon king himself since he's in a deep sleep, and there's no way diavolo wouldn't at least feel if his father had woken up. maybe it was someone from the house of lords? mephisto's parents or grandparents?
it's tricky to pinpoint who the celestial realm would agree, though...
THE BROTHERS EVER i love them all sm
i feel like they woke up in age order, minus lucifer obviously. mammon woke up first and watched over all of them, making sure they were okay, and he probaboy came up with the idea to go to lucifer's room when everyone was awake and well. levi woke up second and was trying to distract himself with his games or his manga or something, but couldn't bring himself to leave until he knew all of them were safe
so on and so forth, but i can't figure out if i wanna believe satan or belphie woke up last. technically, satan's the youngest, but belphie's the weakest. satan was also the first to fall victim to cocytus and was stuck in its depths for the longest, but belphie arguably went through the most emotional distress because of what happened to beel. maybe they woke up at the same time?
incoherent screeching and sobbing noises
MY HEART
i feel like lucifer saying "no matter where you may be, no matter how far away" is only gonna make it harder for them to leave. and it's only gonna hurt the brothers more once they realize they'll (most likely) never see mc again. not in this lifetime, not in this timeline, not unless barbatos wills it
...WE FINALLY GET OUR ROOM BACK ‼️
so it wasn't god that was the celestial realm representative...who was it then?
#obey me#obey me nightbringer#obey me spoilers#nightbringer#obey me lucifer#lucifer obey me#obey me mammon#obey me levi#obey me leviathan#obey me satan#obey me asmo#obey me asmodeus#obey me beel#obey me beelzebub#obey me belphie#obey me belphegor#obey simeon#obey me luke#obey me raphael#obey me diavolo#diavolo obey me#obey me barbatos#obey me michael#nightbringer spoilers#obey me theory#obey me mc#obey me solomon#obey me demon king#obey me demon brothers#nightbringer theory
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A H E M
Guess who is finally out of the crush zone? >/////> He's only been in there for 2 months. I have LORE, I have a PLAYLIST. Lord so help me I LOVE this goofball-
Hey if you aren't a self-shipper dni. I have anxiety lol // self shippers this is okay to rb! I'd love to know your thoughts on the new ship! :D its been a long time coming! (so long as you're not a dick. I dont do critic stuff here cause its self ship lol)
Lore? Lore. (I use his first and last name interchangeably for obv reasons lol)
Kaden met Adam on their birthday. Kaden was out with a group of friends but things went sour when Kaden's ex showed up. There was a huge fight that broke out and basically it ended with Kaden ditching their own birthday party to go cry on the curb because their friends ended up hanging out with their dumbass ex.
That's when they met Sackler. He didn't acknowledge them at first. He sat right next to them at the curb but when he did speak he said something that made Kaden scoff and give him a look of disbelief.
"You look ugly when you cry."
Kaden thought they were already having a horrid night who the fuck was this guy!? Kaden called him a douche bag and smiled a little because they honestly weren't expecting him to say it. He followed up his last statement.
"See now you have a very beautiful smile." smooth bastard.
Eventually Kaden and Adam started talking at that curb side and ever since then they hadn't stopped talking but it wasn't all sunshine and rainbows for them. Kaden learned about his past and the type of person he used to be.
Adam was a player- a big time one, they found that out when they ran into his previous ex's Hannah and Jessa. Kaden made a snap judgement. 'don't fall in love with this guy.' Which of course ultimately failed but they never revealed it to him out of the sheer fear that he would turn them into a one and done.
Eventually Sackler admitted that he liked Kaden way more than a friend and Kaden tried their best to reject him but he knew that they liked him just as much if not more than he liked them.
Thus a relationship formed with the two. It didn't end well.
Kaden had trust issues from the get go and Sackler of course was pissed off whenever Kaden started to feel paranoid and that caused tension between them and Kaden made the decision that they shouldn't be together anymore.
During their break they remained friends, very close friends but there were moments of awkwardness. Adam hadn't moved on and secretly, neither did Kaden but they didn't want to get back with him, not when there was distrust.
Over the time of their new friendship(about a year and a half) Sackler stayed consistent, he really did reinvent himself. Kaden was worried that when they split up he would just go find someone else but he didn't. He did a lot of self reflecting and acknowledgement to all the shitty things he's done in the past and how much he had hurt others because he wasn't emotionally ready to take serious steps. Kaden was impressed.
Kaden didn't leap at the chance to get back with him though. They wanted to make sure he was being serious. Which to Kaden's surprise, he was.
One night they were walking down a familiar spot and Adam grinned running over to the side of street, sitting at the curb and patted the spot next to him to which Kaden followed and sat down. he remanences on the past.
"Remember you sat there, I sat here?"
"You said I looked ugly when I cried."
"Made you smile though."
They shared laughter and smiles about their past when Adam moved closer to them, he wrapped his arm around them, he kissed their cheek and spoke.
"I don't know if you'll ever trust me but I can't life without you, you know? You're allowed to feel what you feel and I'll always be here to remind you that I'm not the person I used to be. I'm not going anywhere. Friend or lover. You're stuck with me.. weither you feel the same or not... I love you"
Kaden lowering their head as Sackler embraced them, his head resting on their shoulder, they seen so much growth and change in him, they knew he wasn't that person who he used to be. They couldn't deny that he wasn't that person anymore.
"I love you too.. " Kaden ended up whispering, they refused to look at him and confessed that they never stopped loving him. They broke down and Adam made them look at him.
"You're pretty when you cry." he smiled "You're pretty when you smile.. and laugh.. you're pretty when you're sitting around doing nothing...you're just so pretty. Beautiful...."
Kaden's lips tugged into a smile and he closed the distance, sharing a kiss that felt brand new as they sat at the place where they first met.
"Happy birthday~" he hummed against their lips
From that day forward, they learned to communicate better, they had trust, friendship, love, he was their best friend and they were his rock, keeping him grounded when he needed it.
#[ugly sobbing] IDGAF if people aren't interested in this ship. It's been a long time coming and I adore this ship! that's all that matters!!#LORE LORE LORE LORE LORE ITS HAPPPEENNNINNNGGGGGGGGG <333#I LOVE THIS SHIP ITS MESSY AND ROCKY AND THEY HAD TO LEARN AND GROW AND AHHHHHHHHHH#Sackler 💞#I'M GOING TO WORK ON THE MOODBOARD FOR THE PLAYLIST NOW!!! AHHHHHH LDJFDSLFKJD#My favourite bad habit;
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My project that started as, "hey, it would be fun to re-watch Steven Universe and do a liveblog" has become, "what if I did an intensive research project on-par with my American cinema censorship project, this time focusing on the timeline of queer representation in American animation?"
I am a menace and I will not be stopped. And now you will all have to hear my opinions about The Simpsons. I'm so sorry.
#specifying American animation because I am NOT knowledgeable enough about Japan to even attempt tackling all the anime#my white American self is not qualified for that discussion#but fuck me I'd love to see someone else do it#original post
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Hi! Love your posts !! Suggestion for a fact (if you take those): Eurocat. The 1990 Eurovision featured an animated purple cat in the postcards (?) named Eurocat and I’ve never seen anyone mention anything about his existence. I only learned about him bc I was researching old shows and saw him mentioned on the Wikipedia page. 10/10
Eurovision Fact #477:
Eurocat was the mascot created for the 1990 Eurovision Song Contest in Zagreb. He appeared at the beginning of each postcard in an animated short that featured a blue background with the name of the country repeating on a diagonal and some cultural representation of the country being showcased that Eurocat would interact with.
For example, on the postcard for Spain, Eurocat blew bubbles that formed the Olympic rings, calling to the fact that Spain would host the Summer Games in two years.
Eurocat was created by Joško Marušić, who is credited for his as a member of the directors of the per-production materials for the contest for animation.
While introducing Belgium, commentator Terry Wogan spoke a bit about the mascot saying, "Eurocat! A tomcat who's slightly neurotic, not too silly, and eminently lovable." He also later said while introducing Luxembourg that he was "trying to ignore this cat," adding "I don't think he's gonna go away though," under his breath.
[Sources]
Yugoslavia, Eurovision.tv.
Eurovision Song Contest 1990 (No commentary), 2:47:06, YouTube.com.
Eurovision mascot 1990 EuroCat compilation, YouTube.com.
Barcelona 1992, Olympics.com.
"I would love to share with you..." @rice-crackerz on Tumblr -- See reblogs and comments (esp by @mirai-desu, @elliemadeit, and @unibrowzz) for their knowledgeable comments :)
#esc facts oc#eurovision#eurovision facts oc#eurovision song contest#esc#anon ask#esc 1990#eurocat#Joško Marušić#mascots#I actually remember learning about him for the first time as I was doing research for another fact. I asked ppl on my main account what#the FUCK he was bc I was so confused why they had a pic of a weird cat dog thing on the Yugoslavia page instead of just some trees (bc#putting a landmark for something that doesn't exist anymore would be awk) and someone replied and gave me the lowdown lol!#I've linked the post that I made where many lovely people taught me who he was! Send those lovely ppl some love!#Also thank *you* for your kind words anon#and if you or anyone else has any other ideas like this about facts they'd like to see I'd love to write them!
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I miss Starscream. I miss when TF wasn't a goddamn trigger
#looking at RID references for someone's commission#and crying my eyes out :') i want my starlight back#i want my fucking joy back#fuck my abuser how can you give someone ptsd and feel absolutely no remorse#how do you abuse someone relentlessly when you know they're at their worst and not give a shit#how do ppl like that exist. i can only hope karma hits u like a bus ❤#3 years!!! of loving stsc!!! and i FLINCH at him??? i CRY when i see him?? he used to feel so safe and loving#i never felt safer with anyone else!!! and now it's like that safe feeling is so foreign. i just want to get better so bad#im so fucking empty without my special interest i dont know how to function day to day#looking at my loved ones and genuinely wholeheartedly believing they'd betray me and hurt me for my abuser#is the fucking worst feeling in the world and i wish i could go back in time and stop myself from meeting my abuser#i wish i listened to my gut i had such a bad gut feeling abt her CONSTANTLY#and yet i stayed bc she kept insisting she was gonna off herself if i didnt cater to her every emotion#over and over and over and over#i wish i could go back in time and change everything#its so hard!!!! you dont know!!! you dont know how hard this feels im struggling every day!!!!#TF was all i had and now it's gone and self shipping is supposed to be my escape#i just want my life back#i dont care what bad things happen to me if i just had stsc i know i'd get thru it but i cant anymore#everything hurts so bad all the time and im so scared im never gonna feel okay again#vent#delete later
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In old roleplaying circles, I used to have people get really angry at me because they found a lot of catharsis in taking their characters those agonizing angst without necessarily giving them an end point of healing whereas my characters would always try to prompt that moment of healing—would be an end point they could come to whenever they were ready, would love them through the pain instead of drive it higher—and I don't think I've really changed at all in that regard, and I hope that ends up being all right.
#this is a complicated way to say that i'm having my chai and meditating on some of the more popular headcanons i saw#when i first got here and part of it was just the circle of blogs i saw initially when i created mine#because they all had a similar sense of characterization for the blorbos and were reluctant to let anything else in#and i totally get that btw because i LOVE seeing varied interpretations and i will happily play in every sandbox#but i'm thinking specifically about the fanon about beej HAVING to leave his home after everything because he tries to fit back in the box#and he can't#and the agony and misery therein like having built an entire life on a literal lie and choosing to jettison it for his own good#and how i have inadvertently built a home life for him that he will return to incredibly changed but will be welcomed into nonetheless#i think about how loose and utterly queer he becomes in korea down to his gestures his clothes his grooming choices#and how yes he DOES remove all of those when he gets home#(my gnc hawk doing much the same i should say)#but replacing the agony of having to leave what no longer serves you with the joy of someone saying 'then let's change together'#and the knowledge that it won't be easy and you need SO much therapy#but that the old and the new can come together in a very intentional and loving and wonderful way#so the mustache comes back and the colors and the loose limbs and the lighter speaking cadence and he feels so fucking good again#and he's loved so thoroughly by all three of the most important aspects of his life for CHOOSING to be authentic#(just like hawk)#and i know a lot of this is me needing to write it because i almost lost my marriage because my wife was so scared of how she changed#that she was projecting onto me all of these thoughts of how she was SURE i'd react and she tried to cut and run early#and how when i wrapped her up in all that love and desire to come along on this new journey and see what happens#that she was overcome and truly didn't believe it was real#but also i do get sad at the tendency to be like 'everyone changed and they can never go back'#when i want to be like 'yes but they can always go forward and they don't have to lose everything they loved to do it'#and i just hope people wanna come on that journey with me#my ramblings
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MAN OH FUCKING MAN those self shipping blogs and their mutuals are so fucking CUTE and WHOLESOME when they put on events and whatnot. i lurk on some of the most adorable interactions. i still can't understand why people make it their personal issue to harass and make rude posts shit talking people who self-ship. THESE CUTE ASS PEOPLE????? who are they hurting????? this girl says her f/o makes her hot apple cider when it's cold even though doesn't like she doesn't turn it down because it's his favorite and he always lights up when he brings it to her !!!!!!!! Sure, i can see where some lame ass with 0 imagination would go "???? what you mean babe? he's litchrally not even real like-' but bitch that's the point- THIS SHIT IS SO ADORABLE!
Oh oh! And this one guy answered this question about who between him and his f/o prefers hot chocolate and he was deadass was like ever since he accidentally burned his f/o with a mug of hot chocolate once he doesn’t want to retramatize him but they do go out for hot chocolate in cafes every once in a while! THAT'S SO FUCKING CUTE BITCH SHUT THE FUCK UP RIGHT THE FUCK NOW I SWEAR TO GOD IMMA CHOKE SOMEBODY-
#man i love to see people writing what they wanna write#but I've learned some shit lately that's made me realize how harsh people can be toward xreader and selfship blogs#and idk if it's because i ran an xreader blog and in the past an imagines blog#but sometimes when i come across those mean ass posts and i read the stuff people say about it i just think. . .#how fucking sad and unimaginative must you be to 1) go out of your way to hate on someone else work#and 2) this work of writing can be an outlet just like any other#im not the type to leave mean comments do maybe that's why it's so hard for me to 'get it'#but the way i see is this#if you at your big age are harassing people for selfshipping and writing xreader shit- regardless of whether you deem it good or not#(bc that's a different discussion)#i see you no differently than the people who were harrassing people for having ocs what- 10 years ago?#we seem to have gotten better about ocs lately- and that's great and I'm so proud of us#but those of us who grew up in that still hold alot of anxiety about sharing our ocs BECAUSE we remember what it was like#to have ocs picked apart scrutinized and picked apart bit by bit (god help them if they were female) for daring to interact with canon cast#i know how much work i put into building my ocs- and i know that when i have the 'audacity' to ship one of them with a male character#they need to be twice as good to stand up near them just so i don't get harassed about it#I'm lucky to be in such a small fandom but I'd be lyin if i said that once i realized how big majima was in this fandom i wasnt discouraged#im not saying that people can't NOT like things- everyone is entitled to not like things#that's not what I'm saying at all#but I've witnessed these blogs- these selfshipping blogs who generally ship themselves with one particular character#(generally someone I've never even heard of) get harassed and told how their f/o isn't real/ how they should get a grip/how they're creepy#this that and the third....#and idk man that shit's not right#i see it and it makes me sick to my stomach#these people are minding their own business and someone buds in and decides that they're gonna try to deter them for funsies#i HAVE seen a self-ship blog gone wrong one run by someone in need of lots and lots of very serious help#she was in a former fandom (i won't name it because it'd be easy to find i think and people flocked to watch her for spectacle)#she had some of the same mental issues as i do plus schiz but she wouldn't seek treatments#she hurt herself regularly because He told her to#but these people?!?! they're talking about kissing and holding hands and tucking their f/os in before bed
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Trying to think if there’s anything that could genuinely get Roger upset or angry at any of his boys, and honestly yeah nope there’s there’s really not
#[ ooc ] ✧〖 bid farewell to weaver’s town 〗#[ i have talked ab this SO much but you'll hear it again---- dhjsdjklsd#[ just#[ unconditional love man#[ those are his Boys!#[ even in situations where one of them gets hurt from their own stupidity or something#[ roger's a selfish man he'll take full blame himself#[ he's their captain he's responsible for them whatever negative thing they do is because of him#[ roger will forcefully yoink the blame from their grips and claim it for himself and refuse to budge on it#[ i'd imagine rayleigh or gaban or someone else usually having to take role of actually Teaching the kids lessons because roger just#[ doesnt know how to do that fdjdskl#[ and he recognizes it and he does try and he is thankful that others do what he cant but he Knows he could never blame them for anything#[ sure he'll get playfully all >:ccc!! @ the kids for fun but honestly just in general roger Doesnt get genuinely pissed often#[ nearly never @ crew at least only to those outside who mess with his crew or loved ones#[ love isnt so much as blinding as roger fully seeing and being aware of fucked up stuff but deciding its not as important as his boys#[ not approving but accepting 'i see you i see what you've done and it hurts me so much to see but i see it and i accept it#and i still love you can we go home now? i'll hold your hands and wipe the blood from them with ginger touch'#[ again!! selfish man!!!#[ like even with extreme cases like say one of them somehow ends up killing rayleigh roger's. Utterly inconsolable and heartbroken#[ but he's still just ruffle their head before going to hide in a corner and cry---#[ i am just#[ shakes fist#[ unconditional love </3#[ does apply to most people he loves but its just taken to an extreme with his boys#[ sighs#[ can you tell its half past 4am fdsdskl
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#hmmm i can see how xanax can be addictive. especially if its not uncommon to grow tolerant to it at lower doses.#not gonna actually abuse it because it *is* my brother's and i *did* tell my parents i was only going to use it as a substitute for my#clonidine until i can get back on it. i'm not going to use up a medication someone else needs. i would never fuck someone over like that.#no matter what some people may believe. plus i really shouldn't be on any benzos long term anyways.#i'd much rather take the medication that helps me sleep and keeps me from having constant intrusive nightmares and stress dreams about the#people i love being harmed or dying‚ or the people who pretended to care coming back and hurting me more. i'd love to not have to deal with#that every fucking night. i'd love to just sleep and mundane dreams i don't even remember and actually get some rest. xanax doesn't do that#xanax just calms my constant anxiety enough to get my brain to shut off in time to sleep. it doesn't do much else for the sleep issues.#it DID make me feel pretty okay when i first took it but yeah not so much now and that's not its intended use but. yeah. i can see how it#can become addictive now. maybe now i have more leverage to get my fucking trauma medication back.#and try something other than fucking prozac. because prozac hasn't done SHIT for me and i'm sick of it i've gotten MORE irritable.#put me on zoloft or something idgaf just stop insisting i take this useless shit.#or paxil. or something other than an ssri i don't know i don't care#just give me something that'll stop me from wanting to kill myself isn't that the fucking *point* of these things?#ugh. whatever. i'm going to bed. i hate being alive. i hate being awake. i hate feeling. i hate everything.
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it's been said before and i'm sure said better than i can phrase it. but really, really - if you like making "i'm going to kill myself" jokes, please try switching to being ironically conceited instead.
anytime something goes wrong, say things like "ah well at least i'm beautiful and charming and everyone loves me." when you forget something, try "my big huge brain is so smart and thinking about too many other very big wizardly thoughts you wouldn't even understand." when you're frustrated by one of your symptoms, start talking like you're in My Immortal. "Life has come for me but my eyes are beautiful pools of gorgeous fire and my hair is amazing. I stuck my middle finger up at life and told it to fuck off and it did."
just... try it for a month or two. try saying the most absurdly self-congratulatory shit you can think of.
i know it's tempting to make suicide or self-harm jokes. and for me at least, a decade ago (!) when someone suggested i stop making those kinds of jokes, i was kind of at a loss for what to replace them with. i wanted to make light of these moments, but genuinely (at the time) my first thought really was suicidal ideation. there was a part of me that even felt like ... i was kind of "making light" of that voice. that if i could say i want to die lol, it would help take the sting out of that genuine (albeit passive) desire. like i could turn my illness into a joke.
when i started complimenting myself instead, it felt awkward and stupid. it felt really, really ironic. what i was actually saying was nobody would ever think this stuff about me, that's what makes it so fucking funny.
but. the effect was immediate. first thing i noticed was the people around me. when i dropped a glass and said ah my skin is too beautiful and sleek the glass has swooned and broken for me, other people were suddenly overjoyed to jump in with the joke. rather than making an awkward moment, we'd both start cracking up. ah princess sleek hands, i've heard of you.
i was 19. i hadn't noticed i'd been making others tense when i said i want it all to end. i know now that it's incredibly hard to know how to walk that moment - do you talk to them about your concern? do you potentially make them uncomfortable by asking if they're okay? do you ignore the situation? do you help them pick up the glass, or do they need to do it by themselves? are they genuinely made suicidal over this small moment? and most importantly, how do you - without professional training or supplies - actually help?
most people want to help you pick up the glass in your life, they just have no fucking idea how to do it. they don't want to make anything worse. they don't want to make assumptions about you. they love you, they're scared for you - and being scared makes people kind of freeze up. it's not because they don't love you. it's because they do.
now when something bad happens, my first thought is how can i make a stupid joke about this. it isn't my brain saying you're a dumb fucking bitch. i spend more time laughing. i spend more time being gentle with myself. i spend more time feeling good.
and the thing is - what's kind of funny - is that you'd be surprised by how many people agree with you. the first time i said i'm too pretty to understand that, someone else said to be fair you're the prettiest person in this room. i promise - you really don't know how kindly your friends see you. but they love you for a reason. they sort of reverse-velveteen-rabbit you. your weird and ugly spots fade away and you just become... the love they want to give you.
go love yourself ironically. the worst thing that happens is that you end up tricking your reflection into actually loving you.
#something something toxic relationships notwithstanding#(re: the friends stuff)#most people love you. automatically. for being alive. like people are just MADE that way.#and the reason kms jokes don't always land is bc people fucking love you and are like - ahhh how do i help#let them help you!!!!!!
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#it hurts so bad#it's been a year and still it feels like there's this empty space in my chest#and when i see them i think of you. when they're living this. this undeserved happiness all i can think of is you#i wish you'd come back and we forget all that happened and i know i'd forgive you. i would always forgive you#you've been out of my life for a year and you could be dead and honestly i wouldn't even be surprised. most days it felt like i was the only#thing keeping you alive. and i realize now that i never should have let you put that pressure on me but i told you i could take it even#when it made me physically sick from stress. i couldn't help it. i loved you.#i still do. that's what hurts so much. that after all this time and all the pain you've caused me i still fucking love you.#it doesn't go away. i keep thinking it will and then i see them happy and all i can think of is the pain they caused us both and the love i#still feel. you were the first. you were my first love and it took me far too long to see it. i should've told you. i should've gotten you#help. they were hurting you and i tried to do the right thing but you chose them over me. that's what hurts the most honestly.#that after everything i still wasn't enough.#i want to talk to someone anyone tell them what they did to you to me but everyone fucking loves th#loves them. and i don't want to ruin someone elses friendship over my wounds.#i had to leave. i couldn't stand to see them happy anymore. it hurt too much. my therapist said it wasn't healthy to be there anymore#i've been feeling it awhile. it's been a year but this wound in my chest won't heal while they're pushing a knife into it. i had to leave.#i'm just so tired of thinking about this over and over. i want to move on.#vent#tw vent#delete later
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a dialogue list for angry love confessions
prompt list by @novelbear | very slight cw for cursing!
"if you can't figure it out by now, then i don't have anything else to tell you."
"i thought that if i did all of this and came all this way, it would finally click for you."
"come back to me when you figure it out."
"i am done. i'm done waiting for you."
"i'm in love with you, you dumbass."
"what the hell did you think i meant by that?"
"i've been stupid enough to keep chasing after you."
"you knew. you knew i loved you and took full advantage of the fact that i'd do anything for you. and i knew that. i just kept at it hoping that one day you'd value me just as much."
"i've been following you around like a lost puppy since the day we met, yet you couldn't see?"
"i dropped everything to be with you! everything!"
"why do i keep doing this to myself..."
"i'm not losing the one person i love because of some stupid shit."
"is that what you wanted to hear? are you happy?"
"what do you think i've been doing this for?"
"i had thought all of this would be so different for us."
"don't you want the same?"
"god, how blind can you be?"
"open your eyes!"
"i've wasted years of my life chasing after someone who couldn't give a fuck about me..."
#otp prompts#writing prompts#imagine your otp#otp writing#writeblr#prompt list#otp#romance prompts#angst prompts#angst#angsty prompts#confession prompts#love confessions#dialogue prompts#prompts#request
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I'd Fight The Devil
Alastor x fem! reader
Background: (Y/N) is the elder Morningstar, and wants to fix her relationship with her dad. But her dad hates her boyfriend.
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3 - Finale
Allusions to sex, actual sex, angel being angel, and cannibalism
_____
Angel spit out his drink, "You're with Alastor?!"
"Yeah, thoughts?"
"And prayers, girl," Angel could never imagine a sweet girl like (Y/N) getting it on with the Radio Demon himself.
But everyone has their kinks, he supposed.
Alastor manifested behind her, and she immediately felt his presence. Pressing herself against him, he leaned into her warmth and kept his arms around her shoulders.
"How was your day, mon amour?"
"It'll be even better," She trailed off, turning around to face him, "when we meet my dad for dinner."
Silence.
And not even radio silence.
"Not to be rash, but I'm sure your father would sooner see my head on a pike than on my body," Alastor adored the fact that she was mending their bond, even more so when Lucifer makes the effort.
But announcing their relationship to him?
He could see it ending in flames.
"I know you two don't get along, but I thought a nice dinner might smooth things over."
"And if he disapproves of us?" He lifted her head upwards with his finger, bemused as to what her answer may be.
"Then he'll have to get used to it," (Y/N) replied, sending a shiver of excitement up his spine.
Only a feeling that the she-devil he was utterly obsessed with could provide.
"Ugh, can you guys go fuck somewhere else?" Angel said, "or at all? I can't imagine going a lifetime without dick."
Alastors eye twitch, "now that's our business, isn't it?"
"Okay, okay," Charlie spoke up, "you guys go get ready."
Charlie couldn't help but notice the change in Alastor. It had only been a few months, but being in her sisters presence alone has made him kind. Sure, the both of them would skin someone alive over an insult, but Alastor would rip out his own eyes if (Y/N) asked.
A perfect match.
(Y/N) dawned a black dress with a pearl necklace that Alastor bought for her. Well, she thinks he bought it but he actually stole it off of a fresh kill.
How sweet.
"Pumpkin! Oh look at you! You're as radiant as ever!" Lucifer fawned over his daughter as they made it to the restaurant, making it a point to ignore the red demon behind her.
"Catching strays?" Lucifer gestured to him.
"Lovely to see you again," Alastor retorted.
"Dad, why don't we go inside? And Alastor will be joining us," now, Lucifer didn't forget what he said. He recognized that the fearsome deer demon had the intention of claiming Princess (Y/N) as his own, but did his daughter return such feelings?
Honestly, Lucifer feared that.
Not it being Alastor persay, but his little girls being hurt.
He knew how awful it felt to go through the divorce with Lilith, and then her disappearance.
He didn't ever want his daughters to feel that way.
"So, Alastor, what do you do again?"
"I have a radio broadcast. Your daughter has actually helped me repair the studio after the attack," He laid his land on hers.
And Lucifer picked up Alastors hand.
And placed it away from hers.
"Uh, dad-"
"Look, if you two are fucking, don't tell me."
"Dad!" Her face burned red, "we aren't-that's not. . .I love Alastor, and he loves me. I want you to accept us both."
"Love? Whoa, whoa, whoa! Pumpkin, I don't think-"
"I'm not a little kid," She interrupted, "I'm a grown woman, and I'm able to make my own decisions. I want to be with Alastor because I love him. You may not think I know what love is, but I know it's what I feel with Alastor."
That's when he saw it.
That look.
Whilst (Y/N) was defending herself, defending their love, Alastor looked at her. Only her. And it was like he was staring at the nebula itself, seeing all its beauty in the Heir of Hell. His smile faltered, closing his mouth, and his eyes softened.
It's the same look that he used to give Lilith.
"If I ever hear that you've made her cry, or even laid a single hand upon her," Lucifer stared him down, "I'll make you disappear."
"A man true to his word. Looks like we have something in common," Alastor agreed, his hand back on hers. She gave him a smile, one that reminded him of Lilith.
The rest of dinner went off without any incidents. The small jab here and there, but no one died, and no one was stabbed. Lucifer learned more about his daughters business and how she lit up talking about it.
"You hardly ate, Alastor. Is something wrong?" (Y/N) asked when her father went to the restroom.
"Oh no, my dear. Just hungry for something else, is all," His eyes raked up her form, earning a cough from the she-devil.
Honestly, she didn't know where he was on his spectrum. She was fine never even being intimate, so long as he was happy, but this spark in his eyes lit a fire within her.
"O-oh. . .are you sure?" Believe it or not, (Y/N) had only had sex twice and both times she'd call it lackluster.
"I don't want you to force yourself if you don't want to," oh how innocent she was. Honestly, Alastor assumed he was aroace before he met the she-devil. Her ferocity - her chaos in fights, her genuine kindness, and her soul - itself brought out that spark.
There are moments where the carnal desire needs to be satisfied.
"Mon cher, I'd never ask if I didn't mean it."
That look, it made her softly gasp.
"Alast-"
"Ew."
Right.
Lucifer.
He showed up from his restroom break and found the pair giving eachother "fuck me" eyes.
"Could I eat my dinner without you groping my child?" Lucifer hissed, despite Alastor only touching her hand.
He blinked, thinking how he's never even groped a woman.
"Maybe."
Sick bastard.
_ _ _ ☆ _ _ _
"Fuck! Alastor!"
(Y/N) had never cum before, so Alastor being her first to ever do so and smiling away at her quivering legs made it so much better.
"Oh fuck. . ." She moaned weakly, his tongue slithering in and out of her to lick up every last drop.
"Al. . ." She was breathless, staring at his strained member. Reaching up to unzip his pants, he tutted as he grabbed her wrist.
"Al?"
"It's about you. Don't worry about me, amour," He purred, kissing the bite marks on her thighs.
"But you-"
Before she could detest further, wishing to satisfy him, the door opened.
"Oh my God, they were right! Alastor, you sly dog," Angel Dust was at the door, and Alastor quickly covered his beloveds' body with the covers before his horns started to grow and his back stretched.
"I'm going to kill you."
"Not before you make love to me, you're not," still in his demonic form, (Y/N) blew a gust of wind to slam the door shut.
Her body displayed on the bed, Alastor agreed.
"And stay in that form. It suits you."
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Confessing & Leading To A Confession Dialogue Prompts
“Look, I know I’m not what your dream partner would’ve looked like, but I think we could work.”
“Fuck, I… I think I’m in love with you.”
“This is gonna sound crazy, but what if we… y’know got together?”
“Whenever I see you with someone else I can’t help but feel hurt."
“There isn’t anyone else but me! I’m the one!”
"There's a reason why I kissed you, idiot."
“No, wait, I have something to tell you.”
"I don't know... but I feel a lot of different things when I look at your face."
“How could you be so blind? I’m right here.”
"Don't make me say it out loud."
"My attention is always undivided for you"
"There's something I've been keeping from you."
"You already know what I'm about to say."
"I want to be more than what this is."
"I don't go around telling everyone these things you know."
"It's real this time. Not a fleeting love."
"You're my priority."
"Don't feel ashamed, it's mutual."
"But I don't want them, I want you."
"You need me just as much as I need you."
"Our future-- or-- I mean..."
"Is that door locked properly?" "Yeah." "Okay, I need to get this off my chest now."
"Sorry I've been avoiding you. I knew we couldn't see each other if I couldn't keep myself under control."
"It's not your fault I got all these ideas in my head."
"Maybe I'm crazy, but I started to imagine what I'd do without you and I really couldn't"
"Just promise to return I have something I need to share with you."
"Had I known all this would've happened, I would've told you the truth from the start."
"I was thinking about it and I've decided it's best if I just told you everything."
~~~
MASTERLIST
#pining prompts#imagine your otp#enemies to lovers#writing prompt#friends to lovers#unrequited love prompts#romance prompts#romantic prompts#romance dialogue#cute prompts#soft prompts#soft romance#prompts#dialogue prompt#character dialogue#mutual pining#unreciprocated love#unreciprocated feelings
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