#but anyway. I do remember that. very very well
lilmoonlad a day ago
A beginners guide to having a fun time at a small show
If you've never been to a show before or you've only been to big shows going to a small or diy show can be confusing. The rules and etiquette of attending a small show are different from what you may have experienced or heard about at a bigger show. I'm here to try to give you some tips and pointers on how to have the best night and help everybody else around you have a great night as well.
Small shows are community based, if you only take one thing away from this post let It be that. The environment is that of friends and acquaintances, this includes the bands that play. The members of these bands are just people who are part of their local scene and enjoy playing music. They should be treated like any other member of the audience, you can be friendly and start up a conversation or compliment the set, but remember they're just a stranger who enjoys the same music you do.
Your first show in a new city or venue? The environment and social expectations of a scene can vary from city to city and venue to venue. If it's your first time being somewhere it's always better to follow the social cues of others rather than looking like an ass. If you don't know what's going on try asking somebody:) Many people in the scene are very happy to welcome newcomers and explain the ins and outs of their individual local seen.
Queuing (if you want "barricade"), for 1500 to 700 person capacity venues, depending on whether or not the show is sold out and the artists popularity, I would suggest showing up 2-4 hours before doors. This would be for places like House of Blues, that are arguably not a small venue, but I'm including them anyway. Anything under 600 I would show up 2 hours to half an hour before doors. Anything under the 300 mark doesn't usually have "barricade" per se, the crowd moves around a bunch and showing up early will not help you get a better vantage point. Note: I never show up anywhere more than an hour before doors and I can usually get pretty close to the stage.
Respect the venue and the people working there, if you're attending a small show, especially a basement show, it's really important to be extra aware of where you put your trash and how you're acting. Oftentimes these locations are rented halls or somebody's actual house. This means there wont be any staff that are being paid to clean up after you, not that you should be messy at larger venues. But at these venues especially try to stick around and help out if you can. If the venue is left trashed they may no longer be willing to host shows in the future.
Braving the pit, there are only three rules I would suggest for the pit, and they all boil down to respect. First, if somebody falls, drops something, or seems like they're having a hard time _always_ stop what you're doing and help them out. Second, don't try to be tough, if the pit is too aggressive for you you can either jump around on the side of it or dance somewhere else. Third, unless you're actively pushing somebody always try to keep your elbows tucked, especially if you're tall. It can be really stressful being a short person in a pit that's just a sea of elbows.
Say hi! not just to the band, to the people around you at the show as well. I know this one can be hard, if you went with folks it's very easy to become insular, and if you went alone it can be scary to talk to people by yourself. Something that I've found really helpful is hanging out outside, either between sets, or after the show (you don't need to smoke I often just cool down with a water bottle). Many people will be excited to see a new face and if you seem open to it they might start up a conversation. If they don't and you don't know what to talk about, try complimenting something somebody's wearing, it can often lead to a story that then can lead to a conversation.
Always show up for the openers, even if you don't care about barricade, you should try to show up for the openers both by physically being there and by paying attention and giving them your energy. I've discovered a lot of really wonderful bands by checking out the openers before a show, learning a couple of their songs, and then really getting into it once they're playing.
Take care of yourself, make sure you come having eaten and drunk enough water, I even suggest bringing a water bottle. Most venues will at least have access to water but it's always good to be self-reliant just in case they run out or something happens. Depending on the style of venue they may require this to be empty, If they do require that, you can usually fill it up once you get inside.
Dress appropriately, especially if you're planning on being up at the front at a punk or hardcore show. You will probably end the night covered in other people's sweat and beer, this is amazing revel in it. But, it's maybe not the time to pull out your favorite shirt, unless you want that for your favorite shirt (in which case I love you)
And last but by no means least, always always always thoroughly check the flyer or event posting to make sure you know if the show is a sober show or not.
I hope you found this helpful<3 if you have any additional questions or concerns please feel free to dm me or leave me an ask and I'll try to get to it
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namor-is-the-way 2 days ago
A/N: This is number three!! Also you all can @ me but I personally hated how Jimmy acted with Tenoch. It felt like Jimmy mocked him and correcting the way he talks since Tenoch is already self conscious about his English. Like I got triggered. Tenoch being cute and sweet but Jimmy is being a bit rude.
Tag: Tags: @shoxji @tian-monique @omgsuperstarg @angel-bi666 @sunfairyy @sunkissedebony97
Summary: Tenoch and Reader are in a secret relationship but accidentally let's it out during the Jimmy Kimmel interview.
Warnings: Dirty Thoughts, Mentions of Smut 馃槼
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"Please welcome (Y/F/N) and Tenoch Huerta!" Jimmy said followed by clapping and cheering from the audience. You walked out with Tenoch smiling and waving at all your adoring fans. You give Jimmy a quick hug before taking your place next to Tenoch who looked excited to be on the Jimmy Kimmel show. It was not your first time being here. "Welcome to the show. (Y/n) it's always a pleasure to see you." He smiled. The interview started off well. Mentioning your long Marvel history, how you frlt about being in Wakanda Forever. Then moved onto Tenoch and his experience. Of course he told the funny story of the zoom call freezing 5 minutes into the meeting. You laughed softly and leaned onto your hand watching Tenoch. How could you not be in love with this man?
It all started the moment you heard who had been chosen for Namor. You instantly looked up Tenoch Huerta remembering him from Narcos: Mexico you watched a while back. You felt yourself blushing at how attractive he was. Plus meeting him in person did not help. There was an instant connection with Tenoch. He was charming, sweet, adorable, kind, humble, silly, and the list could go on forever really. But nothing stood out more than his 'shame short', what he refers the skimpy outfits to. You both worked together for almost the entire shooting time. There had been very few weeks spent apart. Your character played a key role in the film being the Queen of Talokan.
"So (Y/n) how was working with Tenoch?" Jimmy asked breaking you out of the day dream.
"Ah he is an amazing man to work with."
It had not taken but a month of flirting before he asked you out and then fucked you that same day. Since then you two had been a couple. Yet decided it was not time for everyone else to know. You felt like two teenagers sneaking around. Stealing kisses, glances, dates, and rough sex. You two had a loving relationship and never had been happier.
"You two seem close. Almost every picture you two are side by side." Jimmy smirked.
"Ah, yes I mean we are close friends. Our character share many scenes together. Besides he is an amazing man to work with."
Tenoch looked over to you a slight flush in his face. "I never worked with anyone like her before to be honest. Most of my English lines I got scared. Some of my pronunciation is not perfect. (Y/n) really helped me with that. Calmed me and reassured me to just be myself." Tenoch looked toucher her knee in a trance. "That's why I love her." He adds not thinking about it.
The audience gasped at his slip up.
"Oh you love her?" Jimmy didn't miss a beat leaning toward the couple. Tenoch sighed deeply looking at you. You nod in response.
"We have been dating for a year now." He admits taking your hand.
"It's been such a happy time." You add and pulled him into a kiss the crowd cheering.
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bunchesofoats a day ago
Feat 鈥 Tyler Galpin x Nevermore!Reader
Contains 鈥 Slow Build, Playful Flirting, No Established Relationship, etc ALSO SOME VERY LIGHT WEDNESDAY SPOILERS!! (Set before show in canon)
Length 鈥 ~1.8k Words
Notes 鈥 Reader鈥檚 powers/species not specified (just considered an Outcast). This isn鈥檛 proofread, moves a little fast, and was written at like 2 am so proceed with caution I guess. ALSO, I ACTUALLY WORK IN A CAFE SO I WILL INFO DUMP GRRRRBARK BARK WOOF WOOF Also, if you have any input just drop it to my inbox !
鈥淲elcome to the Weathervane staff.鈥
Your new manager welcomed you with a smile, to which you replied with a nod as she left you to do paperwork. You made your way out of her office, remembering her instructions to be training with Tyler. Your feet shuffling up the stairs slowly, paying no mind to the creaks that came with it. You knew Tyler Galpin, not well, but you knew of him enough to know he was the son of the sheriff. The sheriff who didn鈥檛 seem keen on Nevermore students. Though you were pretty sure they only hired you for Outcast Diversity, you were at least happy to had gotten a job that wasn鈥檛 Pilgrim鈥檚 World.
鈥淢edium Iced Chai Latte with a Chocolate Croissant.鈥 A voice pulled you from your thoughts.
Trailing the voice to the source was easy considering he was the only person behind the counter before you came along. There he was, Tyler Galpin, with the usual mop of brown curls that stopped just above his eyes and the crease of concentration upon his forehead as he moved to fiddle with the espresso machine. You鈥檇 been dragged here enough by Enid to know the details, especially considering she kept tabs on everyone.
鈥淵ou鈥檙e looking at the wrong end of the machine, Galpin.鈥 You called out, causing him to jump. A smile crawled its way onto your face at his expression. It didn鈥檛 take long for him to register who you were outside of the Nevermore uniform, he had seen you enough and he knew there was a new applicant coming in.
鈥淒o you make a habit of scaring the hell out of people?鈥 He gave you a pointed look.
鈥淢ore of a hobby,鈥 You shrugged before making your way behind the counter. Taking a closer look at the machine, you had been right. The source of the never ending steam was a valve issue. 鈥淚鈥檓 gonna need a tri-wing screwdriver and 4 millimeter Allen wrench.鈥
Tyler handed you the screwdriver with no hesitation, he couldn鈥檛 understand the Italian instructions anyway and he wasn鈥檛 about to resort to Google Translate.
鈥淵ou have a valve issue,鈥 You began screwing the bits back into place, careful not to direct any steam towards you or your new coworker.
鈥淵ou have one of these temperamental beasts with a mind of its own?鈥 He quirked a brow at you, causing you to roll your eyes.
鈥淣ot exactly.鈥 Thankfully, Nevermore had quite the class in engineering and you had fairly decent grades. The steam stopped spewing, and the machine was fixed to the best of your ability. Tyler began gathering the pieces of the pipes, filters, and other parts back into place resounding in a satisfying click.
鈥淭hanks鈥︹ He stopped for a moment.
鈥淣o, yes! No, I mean, yes I know! You come in here a lot, and I recognize your name from your application.鈥 He mumbled on and on.
鈥淵ou鈥檙e supposed to be training me and yet you can鈥檛 remember my name?鈥 It was your turn to point questions now. It wasn鈥檛 like you couldn鈥檛 work a register or understand the difference between a cortado or a cafe au lait, but you needed to know your way around Weathervane at least. Plus, it was fun to tease him.
鈥淚 just mean, you鈥檙e unforgettable.鈥
鈥淵ou know what, why don鈥檛 we start off with a tour? You know the main area, but let me show you the back room.鈥 Tyler abruptly turned away, leaving with tinted cheeks. He lead you to the small storage room on the opposite adjacent end of the bar counter. The length of it was long, but the width of it could just barely fit one person with the shelves so close on either end. He allowed you in first before following in after, showing everything from the closest to the farthest at the back wall.
With Tyler explaining everything in broad detail, it was easy enough to understand considering everything was ordered neatly from the coffee beans and food products being separated from cleaning chemicals. What was hard, on the other hand, was trying not to pay attention to the way the dim lighting reflected in his eyes. Something about it seemed familiar, almost supernaturally captivating. If you didn鈥檛 know any better, you鈥檇 assume he was a Vampire or Siren or even something else entirely luring you in.
鈥溾nd if you have any questions then just ask me.鈥 Tyler finally turned back to you, catching your gaze. He hadn鈥檛 realize how close in proximity you were, you awkwardly pressed against the wall as he had just been reaching over to point out which coffee beans were which. You hadn鈥檛 been paying attention, not with him so close. You weren鈥檛 usually the nervous type, not with Vampires and Telekinetics and Werewolves etc constantly being around you. But this newfound flip of your heart was concerning considering he was 1) a normie you hadn鈥檛 actually fully conversed with before and 2) you were still unsure of his standing with you as an Outcast.
鈥淵eah, I鈥檒l call for your help when I need to fix the espresso machine.鈥 You snort. He huffed with a lingering smile you managed to catch. Maybe his stance wasn鈥檛 as bad as his fathers.
鈥淚鈥檓 definitely sure you don鈥檛 need to call me just for help with that, you can call me for other stuff.鈥 Tyler shrugged.
鈥淪o you want me to call you?鈥 Your gaze met his again, forgetting the close distance between you both. This was a different start to your new job than you were expecting. Flirting with your coworker in the back of the cafe was probably against all types of normal work ethic and morals. But when was Jericho ever normal?
鈥淭yler?鈥 A voice called out from the front, breaking the tension between you two. You both recognized that voice, Tyler knowing it more than you did. You both tried to scramble out of the storage closet in an orderly manner. Tyler emerging first, Sheriff Galpin perking up to see his son from the other side of the counter. You followed suit not a second after, barely halfway out of the closet before you could see Sheriff Gallon鈥檚 face drop. Suddenly realizing how incriminating the situation seemed, you quickly grabbed a random can from the shelf within arms reach before fully exiting.
鈥淗ey, uh, dad.鈥 Tyler coughed out, clearing his throat from the situation you two were in. 鈥淛ust showing the new hire around and restocking.鈥 To which you maneuvered the can to one hand to give the man a small wave.
鈥淐ondensed milk? I swear you stocked and dated that one when I came by yesterday.鈥 His dad raised a brow. Shit.
鈥淭his one鈥檚 long expired, found it on the back shelf with a manufacturing issue puncture in it.鈥 You laughed dryly, moving the can to your side hiding it away. Tyler glanced wide eyed as his father鈥檚 expression creased.
鈥淵ou want your usual?鈥 Tyler moved towards the bar, moving his father鈥檚 attention with it. You managed to slip the can back on the shelf before closing the door and following the boy.
鈥淟arge Americano. Two shots. Hot.鈥 The sheriff鈥檚 gaze never left, studying you closely as you followed Tyler to input the order on the register. You knew how to work a register, but you didn鈥檛 want to stay within his dad鈥檚 eye sight for long. The setup was as easy as the storage closet, everything labeled from Hot Drinks, Iced Drinks, Specials, and more. Clicking onto the hot drinks, you found everything quickly.
鈥淒id you want to add anything in there like milk or cream?鈥 You asked, knowing already what his answer would be.
鈥淏lack.鈥 Like your soul, you thought. The order went through and Tyler thankfully already had it done. Reaching past you on the register to hand it to him, the sheriff gave his son a nod and you an unreadable look before leaving.
鈥淒on鈥檛 worry about him,鈥 You heard Tyler assure. 鈥淗e鈥檚 too 鈥榳rapped up in work鈥 to care about me being in some closet with someone. Nice save, though.鈥
You turned to make eye contact with him, his arm resting upon the register counter by your waist and yours almost hitting his chest at the movement. Again finding yourself in close proximity.
鈥淒oes that mean you鈥檙e often caught doing who knows what in closets with people?鈥 You raised a brow. His face flushed at the question, glancing aside and for once probably happy the cafe was emptier than usual.
鈥淐alm down, lover boy. We鈥檝e skipped a few steps, I still don鈥檛 even have your number to call you when I need help.鈥 You flicked his forehead away with a smirk. He let out a small lopsided smile as he fell away from you. You were sure his number would be lying around somewhere on file or you could contact him through the employee app, but where was the fun (and consent) in that? You had no time to think about that as customers had come in.
鈥淢s. Thornhill, what a surprise to see you!鈥 You couldn鈥檛 say you were shocked, Jericho鈥檚 a small town and being the only cafe around this would鈥檝e happened eventually. You were surprised you hadn鈥檛 seen Enid out and about 鈥渂logging鈥 despite it being a weekend.
鈥淵/N, lovely to see you. Why didn鈥檛 you tell me you got a job at the best cafe in town?鈥 She gasped.
鈥淚t鈥檚 the only cafe in town, Ms. Thornhill.鈥
鈥淚 kid, I kid. Now what should I get? I usually get a double-cap, no foam, with two pumps of sugar free vanilla. But now that you鈥檙e my new favorite employee, I鈥檇 like your recommendation!鈥 Favorite? Had Tyler been her favorite before? You weren鈥檛 sure what she had meant by that.
鈥淵ou know me, miss, I love a good London Fog.鈥 She knew full well of that too, you bring one into her class every other day.
鈥淎lright, get me one of those!鈥 You rung her up For Here and handed the item receipt to Tyler who was already steaming the milk. The next customer just wanted a warmed up Pain au Chocolat which you got out of the way quick enough.
鈥淗ere,鈥 You heard Tyler call to you. Facing him, you noticed him holding a to go cup for you and Ms. Thornhill鈥檚 mug on the counter. Had he made two whilst you were busy?
鈥淟ondon Fog with an extra pump of vanilla syrup, that鈥檚 how you usually order yours.鈥 He sheepishly scratched the back of his head.
鈥淣ow what鈥檚 this then?鈥 You grabbed the cup.
鈥淛ust think of it as a welcome to Weathervane.鈥 Tyler left with Ms. Thornhill鈥檚 order before you could question any further. You note a black smear on your hand, confusion riddled鈥 you turn the cup.
鈥 鈥(xxx) xxx - xxx
Call me outside of work?
- Tyler鈥
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makeste 2 days ago
oh my god.
so first off, let's just get the one big major criticism out of the way: this episode was definitely not up to the same high quality standards as the first third of this season. and hey, I get it! you're doing 24 episodes in all, you're on a time crunch, and you've only got so many animators to go around. and the quality of some of these earlier season 6 eps (118 and 119 especially) was seriously some of the best this series has ever had. by contrast, chapters 284 and 285, while still easily ranking among my favorite chapters of all time, definitely do not go as hard with the visuals as some of the other War arc chapters (that very last 285 page being the one standout exception).
anyway so yeah, it was still a slight disappointment, but I'm fine with it. it does mean Deku vs Kacchan 2 will still retain its crown as my all time fave, but the real meat of this episode was never going to be about the flashy visuals -- it's all about that sweet, sweet character development.
two more very minor criticisms before I get to the OMG nonstop gushing part of this post! one, they did cut out this scene from ch 282 where Tomura originally had TWO quirk-be-gone bullets in his possession and Kacchan actually destroyed the second one.
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YOU THOUGHT WE WOULDN'T REMEMBER, BONES. BUT WE DID. so for everyone who is giving Kacchan his well-earned love, praise, and admiration today, don't forget to also give him props for saving Aizawa's other leg, or whichever other appendage this doubtless would have hit. my boy out here lowkey saving his sensei from being ReDestro'd.
and then one final nitpicky little quibble, which is that the anime subtitlers declined to use the "Catch-A-Kacchan" translation, despite it being the single cleverest translation of all time, and by far Caleb Cook's biggest and most important contribution to the BnHA canon. alas, twas not meant to be. BUT ANYWAY NOW ON TO THE GUSHING.
okay so first off, we all know that Aizawa is an absolute badass and the most metal motherfucker in this entire series, and that Shouto has by this point all but perfected the art of swooping in to save the day at pivotal moments, and that the U.A. kids all need ALL OF THE THERAPY GODDAMMIT, and that Deku is a COMPLETE LUNATIC who thinks that HAVING FUNCTIONAL ARMS IS OVERRATED ANYWAYS. yes and yes and yes and yes. and if you wish, you can read all about my thoughts on these things and more,聽here and here and here and here.
but you already know what I actually came here to talk about today.
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first of all, YOU GUYS. the music. THIS FUCKING MUSIC, THOUGH. they used the exact same OST track that was used for the "why was I the one who ended All Might?" speech all the way back in DvK2. THIS IS OFFICIALLY THE "TIME FOR NOBUHIKO TO FLEX HIS VOICE ACTING CHOPS" MUSIC. A TRADITION HAS BEEN BORN.
anyway so if anyone needs me I'll just be sitting here playing this scene on repeat until the end of time. no big deal though. I can quit at any time. not like I'm obsessed with it or anything. I definitely love this scene and this character a perfectly normal amount.
All Might talking about how Katsuki understood from the get-go about how OFA was a secret that could put other people at great risk really聽hits hard in hindsight. especially when you realize that Katsuki really did know right from the start, and he willingly accepted that risk with no hesitation, and he absolutely did suffer consequences for it (it was his knowledge of OFA that led to him following Deku and subsequently getting involved in this battle). and I don't doubt that he has absolutely zero regrets.
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okay but can we seriously just talk for a sec about the way Kacchan's anxiety is practically boiling over when he starts to ask All Might about the Fourth's cause of death?? I feel like this is one thing that kind of got overlooked at the time in the manga because we were so completely distracted by EVERY SINGLE OTHER DAMN THING IN THAT CHAPTER lol. but hearing it again here, you feel聽how worried he actually is about Deku, and idk why but it all of a sudden just hit me so damn hard.
"I'm worried about him. you are, too." because that truly is what this whole conversation is really about. or at least that's the driving force behind it. behind this whole episode, in fact. it's simple, when you get right down to it: Kacchan is afraid that Deku is going to die. it's literally been the biggest fear on his mind ever since Deku unlocked SIXQUIRKS. right from the start, his mind was immediately going to the worst case scenarios. he immediately deduced that OFA might have a deeper connection to AFO than any of them realized (shoutout to Kacchan for being the original "Deku is a horcrux" truther lol. ONE DAY HORIKOSHI WILL FINALLY REVEAL THE TRUTH AND PROVE US RIGHT). he instantly zeroed in on the sobering fact that all of the previous OFA users died young. and as he reveals here, he took particular notice of the fact that All Might seems to be hiding something about OFA IV's death, and he is goddamn PRESSED about it.
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and I absolutely LOVE the way that Nobu voiced this part of the conversation. when he starts to question All Might, his breathing starts to pick up a little, and his voice starts to get louder, and the words start to spill out faster and faster almost like he's in a rush to get it all out, and his voice starts to crack just a little, and he goes from not looking at All Might to hesitantly, almost fearfully glancing at him from the side, and then finally turning to face him head on with his eyes all wary and his teeth gritted like he's bracing himself for the very worst (because he is).
and then he finally just asks聽him, "was it because you realized something?" and then he takes in this achingly hesitant little breath before finishing with, "...about One for All?" and just. the whole scene is just SO well done. like, he's seriously so fucking scared聽about this, though. but at the same time he just needs聽to know, and just. oh my god. and Nobuhiko manages to emote all of this so clearly, and that is such a difficult line to walk when you're dealing with a character like Katsuki who's always so hesitant to show his vulnerability. he has to portray these two separate layers of Bakugou at the same time -- the part of him that is trying his hardest to be nonchalant and matter-of-fact in order to hide his fears and emotions; while at the same time also portraying said emotions which are clearly seeping through anyway, regardless of his efforts.
anyway so yeah. I could talk about this for eighty years and never get sick of it honestly but let's move on.
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let me tell you guys, I've been bracing myself for this scene for two full years, and it still kicked my ass. THIS SCENE HAD NO REGARD FOR HUMAN LIFE. literally RIGHT IN the feels. direct hit.
"he's always been that way." no, but guys. the regret聽when he says that. the way he states it with such simplicity and clarity. almost profound. this is just a truth of the world. this is just how Deku is. this is something that took him so long to understand, but now that he does, he can't fathom how he was never able to see it before. and then that ever-so-slight bitterness that creeps into his voice as he goes on to describe how he fucked it all up. ;_;
and then last but not least!!
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"ijimeta." one word, in Japanese. it all comes down to that. and his voice gets so quiet. this whole last part of his speech is so quiet and so soft. but when he says this very last part, his voice wavers perfectly on that last word, and it just. sounds so resigned, somehow, but also just... almost faltering, for just a moment. you can hear the regret as clear as day, but you also hear the fear once again as he finally reveals this fact -- literally his biggest shame; the worst thing that he's ever done -- to All Might. his hero. just, damn.
anyway. so needless to say, despite my expectations being SKY HIGH, this scene absolutely met all of them and blew me away. as expected from the best fucking voice actor in Japan, according to me, a single lone person, whose subjective opinion is absolutely definitely not biased in any possible way.
back to the action! and Nobu getting to do his very best Deku impression lol.
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can you believe this kid. one single nerdy analysis speech was all it took for him to start emitting such powerful Main Character Energy that even Endeavor got taken in and was just automatically following orders lol.
awesome choice of music here while Deku and Tomura continued to battle and Bakugou laid out his plan. you know it's good when they still manage to make you feel the tension even though this is basically just a generic action scene, and you additionally already know exactly what's going to happen.
I have no idea why, but that part with Deku's "Kacchan... my 'Deku' means 'you can do it!'" speech juxtaposed against the image of him going all out against Tomura with such fierce determination hit me like 100x harder than it did in the manga. I was NOT expecting that to be as powerful as it was. damn near gave me chills.
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literally the only time I've ever been on board with the whole "FUCK YEAH, I'LL JUST BREAK ALL MY BONES AT YOU!!" deal lol. it literally makes no goddamn sense but this scene is just so raw.
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and then the next few moments are some of the most legitimately unsettling of the entire series, as we have Tomura screaming at the top of his lungs while being burnt to cinders (and I mean, I love Tomura dearly, but I get it; he literally just Thanos'd tens of thousands of innocent people), followed by AFO's creepy fucking ghost hand reaching out all "LEND ME YOUR BODY~~~" which is a scene that absolutely NO ONE ASKED FOR but okay.
but then right afterwards though! when AFO finally did take over, and you hear that "TV shutting down" sound effect all of a sudden? and then the next few scenes with all the BKDK flashbacks are also weirdly TV-themed? I could not for the life of me figure this out at first, but now I'm actually thinking it could be a reference to the chapter 306 color page?
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OR MAYBE NOT? I actually have no idea. anyway though it may have been random af but it worked for me, what can I say.
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oh. my. god.
AND THEN?!?!?!
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holy shit. and then THE END CREDITS oh my freaking heart. words can't even describe.
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Studio Bones out here not resting until they've succeeded in making EVERY SINGLE PERSON feel the MAXIMUM AMOUNT OF SADNESS THAT A HUMAN BEING CAN SUSTAIN. their callousness truly knows no bounds.
anyway so there we have it! part one of the spectacular season 6 Bakugou Katsuki Redemption Saga. I laughed, I cried, I cried, I cried, I cried a little bit more, and then I cried a little bit more after that. final verdict: yeah, it was pretty good.
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enderpearlll a day ago
How would Yandere!Bob Valesb feel about a Yandere!Y/N who was just as obsessed with him as he is with them, where they'd do their best to always obey and please him. Heck they would even cut themselves for him, so he could taste their blood whenever he wished. And if anyone ever tried to "rescue" them from Bob, they'd straight up try to murder their would be savior.
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Yandere!Bob Velseb with a s/o that鈥檚 as fucked up as him.
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These requests were practically the same thing so I combined em. These are DARK so please proceed with caution lmao.
Gender-Neutral reader.
TW/CW: Yandere content, yandere!reader, blood and injury warning, sadism/masochism, physical abuse, cannibalism, vivid descriptions of murder/violence, etc鈥
鈥 Now, Bob would be over the moon if he had a s/o that was more than willing to let him do anything to them, especially if they loved what he did. You feed into his obsession more than it needs, and it only makes it worse in the long run pain wise.
鈥 And when he says willing, he means WILLING. Like you would do anything for him if he asked, and you were simply, in his own words, his missing piece. Bob never thought that he鈥檇 find someone so eager to let him do whatever, whether it be marking you up as much as he wants or even helping him dismember a body! He鈥檚 head over heels for you.
鈥 Bob had tasted blood before, and after awhile he starts to get sick of the taste. But yours, oh boy, it drove him wild. It was like drinking a sweet wine, going smooth down his throat like nectar. God, he loved it. So when he needs his fill, you鈥檙e happy to maim your perfect skin to let him have as much as he wants.
鈥 Speaking of skin, Bob thinks that the scars that he leaves on you are stunning. Like painting a grotesque portrait, your skin is littered with tens of scars. Bite marks, cuts, scratches, carvings鈥 He drools of the thought of painting your skin with the tip of his knife. He鈥檚 more than happy to let you do the same, and you both even have matching hearts carved into your body. Romantic to you both, extremely disturbing to everyone else.
鈥 Well, that鈥檚 only if Bob lets you see anyone else. He keeps you safe in his old house, which was abandoned after he was arrested. You don鈥檛 care about former friends and family, stuck to his side like a thorn. Bob isn鈥檛 complaining, but he thought that you would at least struggle a LITTLE when he kidnapped you. Nope! You were genuinely ecstatic. You don鈥檛 even bring up any family members or friends, you鈥檙e completely dedicated to him.
鈥 The only thing you didn鈥檛 want to do at first was eat human meat, but eventually Bob managed to convince you to try it. It鈥檚 not like you knew, anyways. But you loved it, and Bob just keeps incorporating it more and more into your meals and when he finally told you (to see if he can get a reaction out of you, of course) you were mad.
鈥 But that was only because he didn鈥檛 make supper that day. You treated it like a normal thing because he did it. (Now that genuinely shocked him, he at least expected a fleck of fear in your eyes.) Congratulations, you鈥檙e hooked on human meat.
鈥 Now, since you barely flinch when Bob does anything out of the norm, he鈥檒l actively try to get a reaction out of you. Bob sees it as a challenge to get you to scream or at least flinch. He鈥檒l pull his knife out on you, nick your skin with his butchering tools, tie you up and leave you in the dark, threaten the lives of your family, but you don鈥檛 give a flying fuck. You鈥檒l giggle and laugh at his frustration, unwilling to give him what he wants. It鈥檚 a very invigorating and dangerous game you two play, and the stakes keep getting higher and higher.
鈥 He remembers one night where he had left to go get supper, leaving you alone. (Bob knows damn well you won鈥檛 leave him anyways.) He returned to the door askew, with you struggling against the grip of a stranger who was begging you to get out of there. Bob was ready to intervene but you had taken a lamp and whacked it against the side of their head. It was a brutal blow, knocking them straight to the ground as blood pooled from their head. You beat their face until it was a bloody pulp, their blood dripping from your face and hands.
鈥 You simply turned around to face Bob, who was watching the whole time, and smiled brightly and ran over to hug him. Throwing what remained of the lamp behind you, you leapt into his arms. 鈥淕ot us supper!鈥 Bob felt his heart pound out of his chest when you kissed him, blood smearing across his lips. Now that鈥檚 one way to make him swoon.
鈥 Now, the perfect song to describe this pair is The Masochism Tango. You鈥檙e both willing to slaughter anyone in your way for each other, but yet you enjoy causing harm and pain for the other. If anyone else dared to do anything to you, Bob would butcher them and dispose of their worthless flesh. And you鈥檙e more than happy to do the same. A terrifying 鈥榬omance鈥 that seemed utterly catastrophic to most.
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josephquinnswhore 2 days ago
We鈥檙e done
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Summary: constant fights and tension between you and Eddie lead to an unhappy ending.
馃敀- trigger warnings
鉂わ笍鈥嶐煩 - angst
Warnings: pure angst. swear words, mentions of childhood abuse, financial abuse, hints of una living/disappearing. No happy ending.
a/n: was kinda projecting with this one tbh. not proofread it鈥檚 1am and I鈥檓 having a menty B while looking after my infant, anyways enjoy.
You knew today would be shit. You were already in a sour mood from constant fights over the weekend with Eddie that left a foul taste in your mouth. All but apologies were spoken, empty threats and harsh words left hanging in the air had your body radiating heat like an overused furnace.
You鈥檇 forgotten to fold some laundry, getting distracted by the already multiple tasks you鈥檇 forgotten you鈥檇 stashed to the bottom of your bag from Math class, you had left it till the last minute as math was your achilles heel so to speak. So there you were from 4pm to 8pm struggling to complete the booklet through Eddie鈥檚 lecture.
鈥淚 work 10 hours a day y/n. You鈥檙e lucky we don鈥檛 have guests, look at the state of this house. What do you do all day?鈥
Eddie had dropped out of school, by the grace of god himself & then some he managed to land a job as a mechanics apprentice. It didn鈥檛 pay the biggest coin, nonetheless Eddie had managed to put down the deposit on a small 2 bedroom house just out of town. It came to be something you despised of him though, as it was a fundamental bullet he liked to keep in his back pocket to shoot you with whenever he got the chance.
鈥淵ou know I鈥檓 fucking studying Eddie! I鈥檓 actually trying to graduate so I can have a reliable career.鈥
You had a few stray weekends of babysitting and waitressing at a cafe, but you knew out of Hawkins employers were looking for permanent full time childcare workers. That had been your dream since you could remember. You had always gotten along with kids and the thought always warmed your heart, watching them grow, reach milestones, pick them up when they fall and encourage them to try again, praise them for their achievements and teach them how to manage their emotions. It was your lifelong and career goal, which you didn鈥檛 need to attend university, fortunately for you that course had been available for off course studying. It was truly your passion and something you鈥檇 dream of spending a lifetime doing.
鈥淵ou鈥檙e lucky you even have a house to live in away from your parents y/n! You鈥檙e so ungrateful I鈥檓 tired of it.鈥
You had a hard time growing up, your parents were critical and not as supportive as you needed them to be, there was some emotional and verbal abuse which made you a very shut off person. Which is why you refused to let the anger you felt for Eddie go, you had trusted him with something traumatising and he used it against you. You were never taught to regulate your emotions and it鈥檚 why you completely blew up when you were angry, just an overwhelming feeling of someone blowing you up and you popping like a balloon, overcome with rage and irrationality. You would say everything and anything just to hurt him, all the while it felt like someone else was in control of your body and mind entirely.
Slamming the car door as you threw your bag onto the passengers seat and practically threw yourself into the drivers, shaking the car violently from the motion. Tears threatened to fall from your lash line as they collected from the overwhelming amount of stress you were experiencing, you鈥檇 gotten a C- on your Math test today, although it was a well enough grade to pass the class and graduate, you felt the frustration in yourself overcome you.
Tyres screeched along the pavement of the carpark as you drove off, towards yours and Eddie鈥檚 house. Your foot to the floor on the accelerator turned your usual route home of 15 minutes into an incredible 7 minutes and 35 seconds. You were amazed at the fact that you didn鈥檛 end up in a ditch somewhere or completely mangled on the road as you had discosiated while driving, not remembering leaving the school carpark at all. The gravel rocks on the driveway flew in every direction as you skid to a halt, swiftly exiting the car and abandoning your bag with that garbage fucking excuse of a test grade.
You turned the metal knob to your front door to see Eddie standing on the other side, his work clothes tossed to the side just centimetres from the dirty clothes hamper, mud stained boots subbing off on the carpet, and wearing a face so furious you鈥檇 be scared of you weren鈥檛 so infuriated yourself. Confusion crept through you as you realised you hadn鈥檛 seen Eddie鈥檚 van as you pulled up.
鈥淲here the fuck have you been y/n? I鈥檝e been worried sick waiting for you to fucking come home!鈥 He slammed the door behind you as you fall into the comfort of your couch, over this conversation already. You look to your watch as it read;
5:26pm. What the fuck.
鈥淚鈥檓 home now so don鈥檛 start this Eddie, I鈥檝e had a long day I don鈥檛 want to argue with you.鈥
You swear Eddie鈥檚 eyes had turned black at your comment, his iris and pupil becoming one black mass.
鈥淵OU鈥橵E HAD A LONG DAY? I had some fucking moron cut my brake lines because he didn鈥檛 want to pay for a service. I had to find a ride home after 10 hours of working my ass off, to come home to find you missing, dinner not ready and the house is a fucking mess!鈥
You swore you could almost feel the walls shaking and the floor vibrating as he yelled at you, his body towering over you as he stood but two feet from your position on the lounge, he was obviously bothered by the fact that you seemed so unbothered, which was the complete opposite of what you were feeling. Absolute rage. That part of you inside was begging and clawing to be released, that coping mechanism to hurt them before they hurt you.
鈥淚 don鈥檛 know what to say to you anymore y/n! I鈥檓 so done with it.鈥
Flick, just like that a switch inside you was turned on and there was no going back. Your chest heaving from the anger you鈥檇 pent up. You stood up from the lounge, only a foot away from Eddie looking up directly to his eyes, 鈥測ou鈥檙e done? YOU??鈥 A maniacal laugh left your lips which left Eddie confused.
鈥淎ll you had to do was fucking graduate Eddie, you could鈥檝e had a decent job instead of working 10 hours like absolute shit to rent a fucking house that has a leak in the roof from rain damage. But now we鈥檙e stuck in this stupid fucking town because of YOU. Because you鈥檙e to fucking stupid graduate,鈥 you poke his chest angrily and take a step forward now you鈥檙e nose to nose with him. 鈥淎ll you do is fucking criticise everything I do, I鈥檓 the only girl in this town and probably within a 100mile radius that would even look in your direction, let alone try to start a fucking life with you. But not anymore Eddie, I鈥檓 fucking done. We鈥檙e done.鈥
Eddie鈥檚 face had fallen and turned a pale white, you could practically hear his heart shatter at your confession but you were too overcome with negative emotion to care. You stormed out of your shared house, not caring that all of your belongings were still inside with your now ex-boyfriend.
You were about to pull your car door open when your were jerked backwards by what turned out to be Eddie鈥檚 hand around your wrist. You face him and your heart trembles, his eyes are already puffed and red, tears stained his face while fresh ones still ran, his bottom lip quivering.
鈥淧lease don鈥檛 go baby, I promise I鈥檒l be better. I鈥檒l do anything, you can鈥檛 go baby. I want to marry you,鈥 his hand caressed your own that held you there and the other held the side of your face. 鈥淪weetheart please, you鈥檙e my everything, I鈥檝e lost everyone.. my mum, I can鈥檛 lose you too.鈥
Your heart suddenly felt like it was made of concrete, your chest restricting making your heart race, you began to panic.
You shook his hands off so you were free of his touch, he had lost all hope he hid in his eyes once you鈥檇 done so. 鈥淚 can鈥檛 Eddie.. I can鈥檛 just take all of the things I said back. It won鈥檛 be the same. I鈥檓 sorry. I love you Eds but this won鈥檛 work.鈥
You quickly retreated into your car and drove off so he wouldn鈥檛 see your own tears, you felt your heart breaking as you saw him drop to the ground onto the gravel driveway as you drove off, his sobs could be heard along with your own as your whole body racked with guilt and heartache.
You drive mindlessly as you had nowhere to go and no possessions, Eddie was your home and without him you had nothing, you were nothing.
Maybe you should just disappear, you were done after all.
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laundrybiscuits a day ago
(wait for the season to come back to me tag)
It gets less strange, as time goes by. Eddie doesn鈥檛 make any kind of noise about him moving out at some point, and neither do Steve and Robin. Turns out they don't need to store any bodily fluids in the fridge, and in fact if Steve didn't know better, he wouldn't be able to tell that Eddie's drinking blood at all. Steve assumes he's getting animal blood from somewhere on a regular basis, but as far as either Steve or Robin can tell, he never takes it inside the apartment.
Anyway, it turns out Eddie can still technically eat human food, but about half of it tends to come back up afterwards. They鈥檙e still figuring out what works and what doesn鈥檛. Robin made a little chart with smiley-face and frowny-face stickers, which Eddie has been gleefully filling out. He鈥檚 drawn little fangs onto the stickers with a Sharpie.
That鈥檚 another thing: to Steve鈥檚 mild surprise, Eddie and Robin have been getting along like a house on fire.
鈥淚 really wish I鈥檇 known him in high school,鈥 says Robin, slicing bell peppers for dinner.聽 鈥淚 think it would鈥檝e made Hawkins a lot more bearable.鈥
Steve doesn鈥檛 really remember Eddie at all from school, which is probably a really good thing.
He can鈥檛 imagine the guy he was back then being this obsessed with Eddie. Well, no, that鈥檚 not true. He can imagine it, but he鈥檇 have been such a jackass about it. Probably would鈥檝e fucked a few girls about it. Maybe would鈥檝e even bullied Eddie about it.
鈥淒id you come out to him yet?鈥 Steve asks Robin.
Robin leans all the way out the kitchen door, practically horizontal. Steve grabs the back of her belt so she doesn鈥檛 overbalance. 鈥淗ey! Hey, Eddie!鈥 she yells.
鈥淲hat, Buckley!鈥 he yells back.
鈥淚鈥檓 gay!鈥
鈥淐ool, me too!鈥
She lets Steve鈥檚 grip swing her back in, grinning. 鈥淵our turn, dingus.鈥
Steve鈥檚 going to. He is. The longer he waits, the more awkward it gets. He鈥檚 got nothing to lose. He鈥
Robin takes him by the shoulders, spins him around, and pushes him out into the living room.
鈥淯h,鈥 he says. 鈥淚鈥檓鈥攂isexual.鈥
Eddie actually does, like, a full-body twitch; his eyebrows climb practically to his hairline for a second, and he sets down his book.
鈥淚鈥檓鈥ery proud of you? Thank you for telling me?鈥
鈥淲hy are you being weirder about me than Robin,鈥 says Steve, annoyed.
鈥淏ecause you鈥檙e being weirder about it than Robin was! I don鈥檛 know, I don鈥檛 have a lot of practice with, uh, this. Also, Robin was a band geek who dressed like Annie Hall, and you were鈥攑opular.鈥 He draws out popular like it鈥檚 got three key changes in it, waving his hands in the air.
鈥淵eah, okay,鈥 Steve huffs. 鈥淪orry I wasn鈥檛, like, alternative enough to be a real queer.鈥
鈥淣o, c鈥檓on, Steve, I didn鈥檛 mean it like that. I accept you! Buckley, get in here and accept Steve with me.鈥
鈥淪te-eve Harrington,鈥 Robin sings out, wandering out of the kitchen to wrap her arms around Steve鈥檚 waist. 鈥淲e accept you and your beautiful bisexual soul.鈥
鈥淭hanks,鈥 says Steve dryly.
Eddie points at him. 鈥淔eel accepted.鈥
鈥淚 feel accepted,鈥 Steve says; daring, he holds out an arm, and Eddie hops up to let Steve pull him into the hug too.
鈥淕ood,鈥 says Eddie into Steve鈥檚 shoulder. 鈥淵ou should be.鈥
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stinknoodle a day ago
Just One Dance
Summary: Steve bumps into you after dropping Dustin off at the Snowball and decides to stop and catch up, unintentionally uprooting long forgotten feelings within the both of you.
Fic Flavor: Childhood friends to lovers(kinda), mutual pinning, mild angst
Word Count: 5,316
As Steve pulled away from the gym entrance, jaw clenched, he spotted a familiar form in the distance, one he hadn't taken in for a while. You were perched on the edge of the sidewalk, your leather jacket pulled tight around your body and a cigarette in hand. He frowned, this was an odd hour to be sitting alone outside. With recent events weighing heavily in his mind, he pulled up to park about a yard away. He'd just check up on you, maybe offer to give you a ride home, just in case. He only harbored fond memories of you and the thought of something bad happening to another person he knew made his stomach turn.
As he approached, you didn鈥檛 take notice. A skateboard, your skateboard, sat upside-down on the road, pushed against the sidewalk. The bottom was decorated and seemingly hand painted, your name in an edgy font surrounded by haphazard doodles of skulls and flowers and all sorts of other clashing designs. Your shoulders jumped slightly when you finally became aware of his presence.
"Uh- hey." He greeted awkwardly, hands clenching and unclenching at his sides.
Much to his relief, a wide grin split across your face. "Well, well, well, if it isn't King Steve, in the flesh."
He scoffed lightly at the faux title, choosing pointedly to not comment on it; the only thing he'd felt like "the king" of lately was the losers. "Glad to see you haven't changed too much, (Y/N)."
Which isn't to say you hadn't changed at all, you held yourself very differently than the last time you had really talked. You sported some new piercings and dark eye makeup that made the color of your eyes pop. A couple chains hung loosely at your belt loops and a few wrapped about your neck. The alternative style you'd taken to was starkly different to the softer, preppier one you had worn the last time he had checked, but then again that was, what, eighth grade? He tried to not be too surprised. You seemed much more comfortable in your skin now anyways; it was pleasant to see.
"What's Mr. Harrington doing out here all alone on this fine night, hm?" You tilted your head with a smirk.
He scratched the back of his neck. "Just dropping off a, uh, friend at the Snowball." It felt a little weird to call Dustin a friend, but at this point it would be weirder to call him anything but.
"Ah," You grimaced slightly, "s'that why you look like a kicked puppy?"
"What?" He snapped, a little more irritably than he had meant to, immediately regretting the tone.
Thankfully, you held your hands up in mock surrender and chuckled. "Sorry, I just saw Nancy in there and assumed. Teach me to make assumptions."
"No it's-" He sighed, dragging a hand down his face, "it's fine, I'm sorry."
You shifted a bit and leaned back on your free hand. "You are forgiven, your highness. Care to take a seat with a lowly peasant, have a smoke?" You offered up the cigarette with a friendly grin.聽
He sat next to you gratefully, hesitating a moment before taking the cigarette from you and taking a long drag. The quiet between you was filled with the distant thrum of music wafting from the gym. Your shoes tapped the pavement, but there was no anxiety to the movement; it was more like you were bursting with energy that your body was hardly containing. It had always been like that with you, though you had tamped it down more in your younger years.
"Do you remember our Snowball?" You suddenly spoke up, a fond smile on your lips. You weren't looking at him, but at the hole in the thigh of your black jeans, which you were picking at with bored hands.
"Uh, kind of." He shrugged, the memory felt so distant now.
Suddenly your gaze shot up, your grin widening impossibly. "Wait, do you not remember?"
He blinked at you, brows slowly knitting together as he tried to scrounge for what you could be talking about.
You laughed easily, catching yourself on his shoulder as you leaned back from the intensity of the movement. "Holy shit, you really don't! That's fucking wild!"
"What are you talking about?" He finally relented, cheeks flushing lightly with embarrassment. You gently plucked the cigarette from his hand, taking a short pull from it before pushing the smoke through your teeth.
"Way back when, I asked you to go to the Snowball with me. You said yes." You snickered as you watched recognition slowly leak back into his face. "Then, when we got there, you completely ignored me. Didn't even dance with me once."
Guilt boiled through his stomach and up his chest, remembering vaguely with horror. "Oh, God, right. I- I'm so sorry-"
"Don't be!" You laughed again. He didn't understand, especially as you propped a warm arm up on his shoulder, looking up into the sky with a fond expression on your face. "It's kinda funny now. I mean, obviously it was absolutely devastating at the time, but now I look back at it and laugh. I mean, what did I think would happen?"
His frown deepened, confusion marking up his face. "How is that funny?"
Your smile didn't falter as you turned your gaze to him. "Just- what did I expect? You're Steve Harrington and I'm- well, I'm me." You shook your head and chuckled, lowering your gaze to your lap. You sucked in another breath of smoke and blew it out of the corner of your mouth. He didn鈥檛 miss how you used the present tense in your statement, implying that this was still a current dilemma.
Quiet fell over you once more, but this time there was a mild tension to it. Steve floundered for a way to express the thoughts in his head as he recalled that night.
"I'm sorry I did that to you, it was really shitty of me to ditch you." He spoke genuinely, picking at the sidewalk.
You glanced at him with a funny look and you shook your head. "Nah, there's no hard feelings, really. I just get it now, y'know?" You shrugged. "It's probably for the best you crushed that when you did, we would've never ended up suiting each other."
"What does that mean?" It stressed him out how casually you sold yourself short. You tapped the ashes off of the tip of the cigarette on the thick sole of your shoe and placed it into his hand in favor of toying with a safety pin on your jacket.
鈥淚 really liked you, Steve. Like, a lot.鈥 You smiled. Before he could respond, you continued on. 鈥淏ut, if you had indulged me even a little, I鈥檓 certain things would have turned out much worse. You let me down arguably easily, I never would鈥檝e survived the popularity you garnered.鈥
He let the words settle in for a bit before he shook his head. 鈥淚 wouldn鈥檛 have let anyone give you shit.鈥
You smiled appreciatively, but still mirrored him with the shake of your head. 鈥淣ah, look at us. You would have been a social outcast just from being around me. It鈥檚 better like this. I鈥檇 rather us be distant than ruining everything over some stupid, shitty eighth grade break-up anyways.鈥 You laughed.
鈥淚 guess鈥 I just feel bad for screwing you over, even just as a friend.鈥
"Don't worry, Stevie. You'll find a nice girl to settle down with, make a little family, and I'll- I don't know, find someone more my speed. Things will work out one day."
He rolled the cigarette between his fingers in thought, swallowing hard. Why did that sting so badly? He hadn't thought about you like that in years and yet it hurt to be written as completely incompatible, for you to paint your respective futures without the other in them. He knew you hadn鈥檛 really talked in years, but that didn鈥檛 mean you couldn鈥檛 start again, especially with how well things were going tonight. He took one more drag before putting out the stump of the cigarette, discarding it in the street. The two of you listened to the music, a light hum starting in your throat.
"I actually did want to dance with you." He suddenly confessed. You gave him a confused look and his cheeks burned under your gaze, a hand scratching at his neck. "At the Snowball. I remember thinking that you looked really pretty and uh, I wanted to dance with you. Really badly. But I-" he coughed into his fist anxiously. "I let my friends talk me out of it. Which fucking sucks and was really rude, and even though you say it's fine I'm still sorry."
Your lips parted slightly, something unknown sparkling in your eyes. As he finished speaking, you smiled warmly and let your cheek press to his shoulder, almost like you were hiding.
"Thanks, Steve鈥" Your voice was softer than before.
"Yeah鈥" He replied, tentatively wrapping his arm around your back to softly grip your forearm on your far side. The silence rolled back in, but it was softer this time, and lasted much longer.
"I'm sorry about Nancy, by the way." You spoke quietly, hands fiddling in your lap. "I was- uh, I saw you guys kind of get into it at that dumb Halloween party. And then I saw you leave without her and Jonathan and-" you sucked in a breath, like you'd said too much. "Yeah, I'm just sorry."
He squeezed your arm lightly, swallowing the lump in his throat before replying simply with, "S'fine."
You chewed your lip for a long pause, but when the distant song changed to something slower, you suddenly sat up straight; Steve quickly missed your warmth.
"Well, I believe you owe me a dance." You grinned brightly at him and held out a hand.
He stared into your scraped up palm, bewildered at the sudden change in mood. "What?"
"Hey, it's the night of the Snowball, I'm dressed in my best,鈥 you gestured to yourself almost sarcastically, 鈥渁nd you always look good,鈥 you gestured to him, sounding a hair more sincere, 鈥渁nd you owe me at least one dance." You snickered and pushed yourself to your feet, offering up your hand again. "Unless, of course, you've suddenly decided you don't want to associate with undesirables."
He rolled his eyes and took your hand, albeit gently to accommodate for the scuffs there. "Stop talking like that, I'm not really that much of anything anymore, and you鈥檙e not," he scrunched his face up and shook his head, 鈥渦ndesirable.鈥
You tugged him to his feet with surprising strength, and he was mildly grateful for your thick-soled shoes; it put you at the perfect height difference, which made it easier to dance. You guided one of his hands to your waist and trailed your fingers lightly up his arm to rest on his shoulder. The two of you slowly began swaying awkwardly, a little stilted and bodies just a little too far away from each other.
You laughed sweetly, head thrown back in a way that exposed the pretty skin of your throat. "Harrington, I don't think any teachers are gonna come tell us off if we get a little closer. I didn't take you for being shy." That smirk pulled back onto your face.
He rolled his eyes, cheeks burning hot as you stepped into his space without hesitation. He released your waist and brought your joined hands above your head to give you a quick spin.
"How's that for shy, huh?" He said as his hands returned to their previous placement.
You only laughed again in response.
As you both relaxed, you slowly drifted closer and closer, as if being drawn together by an invisible string. Soon, your head was pressed to his chest, his hand released in favor of joining your other hand behind his neck. Both of his hands stayed respectfully on your waist, his chin lightly pressed to the top of your head. While you swayed, he was suddenly very glad he had decided to stop and talk to you. That reminded him, however, of the reason he'd stopped in the first place.
"Yeah?" Your voice was like a fluffy blanket, soft and warm.
"Why were you sitting out here alone?"
You laughed shortly, leaning up to his ear. "To be honest?" You hesitated, voice shaking with hardly contained humor, with an ever widening smile. "I ate shit while riding my skateboard around and was trying to pick the gravel out of my body, but it made me nauseous so I stopped."
"Oh my God." Steve laughed through the words, delighting in the way you hung off of him as you lost it. You hid your face in his shirt, muffling the high, hysterical sounds of your giggles.
"Do you want a ride home after this, then?"
You looked up with tears of laughter in your eyes. "I thought you'd never ask.鈥
Despite your protests of being okay to walk on your own, he helped you into the passenger seat of his car, giving your hands a light squeeze before drawing back to shut the door and head over to the driver's side.
"So, how's about we head over to my place to patch you up first, hm?" He spoke as he pulled onto the road. "It's pretty late, though." He added, more to himself than to you.
You chuckled, "Sure, Steve. My parents aren't home anyways, they won't even notice."
He nodded knowingly. Some things never change, and that had been one of the reasons you two had originally gotten so close in eighth grade. Neither of your parents were ever home, so you'd just walk to each other's houses after school. Sometimes just to hang out, but mostly to spend the night. It made you both feel just a bit safer, to have another body in the house with you. He realized how much he had sorely missed that feeling of security as he pulled up to his house.
"Do you鈥 do you wanna stay the night?" He cleared his throat and tried to sound more confident than he actually was. You winced and opened your mouth to reply when he suddenly realized how charged with implications that question now was.
"Not to like- not like that, just, y'know," His voice died as he concentrated on parking the car and finally turned to look at your hesitant face, "like we used to. Obviously I have the guest room and you can say no of course you can always say no but-"
"Steve," You pressed a reassuring hand to his shoulder, "I'd love to stay the night."
He sent back a small, apologetic, and grateful smile. To be truthful, he hadn't been sleeping very well, if at all. Every time he closed his eyes, all he could see was those things. He heard them between every baited breath, and when his eyes slipped closed, he felt them watching. The rational part of him knew it was all over, that he was probably safe in the confines of his room, that the only creatures he had to worry about in the tender hours of the night were wild animals typical to the area, but he just couldn't shake that feeling. The feeling that he was being watched, that the worst was only yet to come, that something was waiting just beyond their sight, watching, waiting.
"Steve?" Your voice pulled him out of his spiraling thoughts, hand clenched around the cold bathroom doorknob.
"Sorry," He mumbled before twisting the handle and stepping in.
"It's fine," you stated gently, closing the toilet seat and sitting atop it while he dug through cabinets to locate the first-aid kit. "Where were you?"
"What?" He glanced up at you without turning his head.
You waved a hand, lips pursed. "You looked like you were鈥 somewhere else. Somewhere bad."
It took a moment for him to get what you were saying, but once he did a lump formed at the back of his throat. He knelt at your feet, trying to roll up your pant legs with careful consideration for your knees.
"Nowhere, it's fine. I'm just kind of鈥 tired." Not a lie, he felt like his limbs were made of lead.
You hummed, leaning forward to rest an elbow just above your knee and perching your chin on your hand. "This'd be easier if I was wearing shorts. You got anything I could borrow?"
He stood up, relenting and letting your pant leg drop back down to your ankle. "Yeah, I'll be back in a sec."
It was only when he had started digging through his dresser that he realized how readily he agreed to lend you his stuff, how easy you had found it to ask him to. There had been no hesitation, it almost felt natural, like it hadn鈥檛 been nearly four years since you鈥檇 even spoken a word to each other. He felt something warm in his chest, and he decided to be grateful for the comfortability that still remained between you two.
When he got back, you were picking at the open wounds on your palms, wearing a bored expression. "Stop that, you're gonna make it worse."
You looked up and gave him an award-winning smile of innocence. "Doing what? I've got no clue what you're talking about."
He tossed you the shorts and t-shirt in his hands and headed for the door. "Let me know when you're done changing."
You tilted your head curiously. "Why's there a shirt? Something wrong with mine?"
"Just figured you'd want to sleep in something other than your street clothes, you're free to just give it back." He called over his shoulder before pulling the door shut behind him.
The bathroom was nearly silent behind Steve as he leaned against the wall beside the door. He was almost nodding off when your voice suddenly sounded.
"You can come back in, pretty boy."
The pet name made his cheeks glow with blush, taking a calming breath before opening the door with indifference forced onto his face. It got even harder to keep the expression when he saw you, in his clothes, in his bathroom, staring up at him. Your street clothes were folded neatly on the edge of the sink, your socked feet lightly tapping at the tile. A smirk tugged at your lips, and you were opening your mouth to say something when he quickly ducked the statement to kneel at your feet once more.
"Christ, how were you even standing?" He lightly ghosted his fingers over the bloody gashes at your knees. He pressed his palm just above your knee and stroked the skin there with his thumb. "Why didn't you say something sooner?"
As he looked back up at you, he found your mouth still hanging open, cheeks flushed. You coughed into a fist and cast your gaze to the side. "Looks a lot worse than it actually is."
He scowled lightly. "Really?"
"Yeah, I've experienced worse." You chuckled. "Nothing will compare to when I broke my leg sophomore year." You grinned down at him, an attempt to reassure him gone wrong. "The bone was sticking out, it was pretty sick."
He looked horrified and you laughed, loud and hearty and so very you. "That's terrible."
"It's fine, really. I've recovered, obviously." You chuckled. He finally withdrew to start digging through the first-aid kit, shaking his head in disbelief as he did so. That definitely explained the massive scar on your left knee.
"Okay, here, this'll probably sting a bit, but it's important that we get them as clean as possible." He narrated as he pulled out some hydrogen peroxide. He dug around for a small hand towel and dumped some of the liquid on it.
"I'm a big kid, I'm sure I can handle it."
He shook his head again. "You can squeeze my shoulder if it hurts too bad, and we can always take breaks if you want."
Your grin turned mischievous, "Oh, yeah? You gonna take care of me?" Your flirtatious tone made his face light up like a Christmas light. He quickly pressed the cloth to your right knee.
You gasped loudly, hands flying down to squeeze at his shoulders. "Jesus Christ, Steve! A little warning would've been nice!"
He didn't respond, opting to rub your left thigh apologetically. He would've apologized out loud if he had trusted his voice to not shake. By the time he was done wiping down your knees, you had two fistfulls of his red shirt in each hand. Your makeup was running down your cheeks and neck, forcing yourself to swallow back a pained sound.
"You did such a good job, we're almost done, alright?" He spoke softly, setting down the cloth in favor of antibiotic ointment and bandages. To give you some credit, they did in fact, look a lot worse than they actually were. Still, he hadn't been expecting any reaction less than the one you鈥檇 had.聽
"Give me your hands?" He asked lightly as he finished up bandaging your knees.
You gave him a hesitant look, paired with a sniffle, but extended your hands at his patient expression. He felt you relax in his grip as you realized those didn't hurt nearly as bad as your knees.
"There," He practically breathed the word out, having to clear his throat to continue, "all better."
"Gonna kiss 'em better?" He looked up into your watery grin, and he found himself having to scramble to regain his footing in the situation. He looked back down, and leaned in to press a soft kiss to each knee.
"St-Steve-" you stammered, but you choked on your words as he took your hands into his, looking into your eyes as he pressed light kisses to your palms.
Satisfied with your silence, bright red cheeks, and gaping mouth, he stood. "Better?"
"Y-yeah." Your voice trailed off, quickly glancing into your palms to trace the kisses with your eyes.
"Good, you had anything for dinner yet?"
You shook your head wordlessly, jumping a bit when his hand reached into your view.
"C'mon, I think I can whip something up for us." He didn't actually expect you to take his hand, you would probably just push it away with another hearty laugh. That's what would have made sense with what knowledge he鈥檇 gathered on you. You did no such thing, however, taking his hand and letting him pull you to your feet. He felt your hand squeeze at his lightly, lingering just a little longer than what was probably acceptable, and let go.
What was happening? Why were you both acting like this? Steve was absolutely puzzled as you started talking his ear off, it was almost as if none of that had just happened. He was only half listening as you rambled, but you didn't seem to mind his distant expression; you must have just wanted someone to talk to. The entire time all he could think about was how bizarre tonight had turned. He felt almost bad at the fluttering in his chest, but it was kind of soothing and certainly preferential to the ache that had been there earlier in the night.
After dinner, you had cleaned your makeup-smudged face off and gone your separate ways. You had patted Steve's shoulder with a splitting yawn and mumbled out a "G'night." The knowledge that you were in the house with him did less to soothe his nerves than he thought it would, less than it had when you were little. Then again, he had had less things to worry about at that time, As he laid in his bed, his eyes kept drawing back open to stare at the window. Every little sound was some nightmarish creature, every shadow was hunting him. He dragged a tired hand down his face, stretching out the heavy bags under his eyes. Suddenly, he ripped the blankets back from his body and stood, a hand quickly being pressed to his desk to steady himself. He couldn鈥檛 help but look out of the window at the pool. His stomach lurched and he forced himself to turn away, a sad attempt at shutting out the millions of thoughts spinning through his head. It鈥檚 bullshit, we killed Barb, we killed Barb, bullshit, bullshit, bullshit. He tried to be quiet as he stumbled to the bathroom and splashed his face with palm-fulls of water; it took at least 30 minutes to stop himself from retching.
With any chances of sleeping officially ruined, he made his way to the kitchen. He got himself a glass of water and sipped at it morosely, trying to convince himself that he was safe. The creak of the stairs set him on edge, hand gripping at the cup. His heart pounded in his ears as the sound of something moving through the house got closer and closer until-
鈥淪teve?鈥 Your groggy voice immediately shattered the tension. You gave him a tired smile, your tone teasing as you continued. 鈥淵ou too cool for sleep, huh?鈥
A heavy sigh of relief tore through his chest, the inhale proceeding it shaky. 鈥淵eah, something like that.鈥
鈥淵ou okay? You look鈥︹ You sleepily searched for an adjective as you made your way over to him.
鈥淟ike shit?鈥 He provided.
鈥淪cared.鈥 Oh. 鈥淭errified, actually. Did something happen?鈥 Oh.
It was humiliating how that simple question nearly brought him to tears. He liked to blame the lack of sleep for how vulnerable his body was trying to be. It took a massive amount of effort to dam up the flood of tears and the selfish explanation that came rushing in. The less of the truth you knew, the safer you would be, and he refused to be the one who put you in that kind of danger just because he couldn鈥檛 keep his shit together.
鈥淏ad dream?鈥 Your fingers lightly brushed the back of his bicep as you unknowingly provided a helpful excuse for him to escape with.
He nodded, teeth clenched tightly. He averted his gaze quickly to stare into the wall and attempt to blink back the tears.
You were quiet for a long beat, fingers drawing soothing patterns into his skin. You took the glass from his hand and took a sip from it. 鈥淒鈥檡ou wanna build a blanket fort in the living room?鈥 When he looked back at your face, you were grinning childishly.
鈥淥kay, that should do it,鈥 You groaned with a stretch as you gave one last tuck to the corner of the blanket draped over the top of your soft structure.
鈥淵ou鈥檙e still really good at that; you been practicing without me?鈥 He teased with a tired smile.
You laughed and shook your head. 鈥淏uild a fort? With another man? What do you take me for?鈥
He let out a responding laugh, combing a hand through his hair to push it out of his face.
You grinned up at him, clearly pleased with that response. 鈥淲ell, what are we waiting for?鈥 And with that, you were crawling in through the entrance.
Steve waited for you to settle inside before heading in out of fear that he would tear the whole thing down. You were snuggled into the corner, surrounded by pillows and trying to set the flashlight up in a way that it didn't need to be held to still shine light into the makeshift cove. The fort was not as spacious as it had appeared to be, or rather, the two of you were a lot bigger than the last time you'd built a fort together, and you hadn鈥檛 accommodated for this factor. His legs ended up snug against yours as he laid next to you, your shoulder pressing into his chest.
"There." You finally let out a quiet, excited woop as you succeeded in putting up the flashlight. "Now," you turned your gaze to Steve, suddenly holding a faux air of severity, "you gonna come here or what?"
鈥淲hat?鈥 He laughed the word out, feeling the tops of his cheeks and the tips of his ears heat up at your opened, welcoming arms.
鈥淲ell,鈥 you wiggled a bit to get more comfortable, 鈥渢his is a pretty small fort, and you look pretty cold, and I鈥檓 pretty sure you鈥檇 benefit from a good snuggle.鈥
鈥淵ou look pretty,鈥 He grumbled out, the words a failed knee-jerk attempt at sass. Your cheeks leaked rouge and you beamed back at him.
鈥淐鈥檓on, I won鈥檛 make you do anything if you genuinely don鈥檛 want to, but you seriously look like you need a hug.鈥 He was grateful that you hadn鈥檛 brought up his comment.
You were right, of course, he definitely needed a hug. The longer he stared at you in contemplation, the harder it was to resist giving in. Finally, he slid closer to you, careful to not press his entire weight into your body. Your arms wrapped around him and your hands came up to hold his head, all to pull him closer into you.
鈥淭here we go, c鈥檓ere big cat,鈥 Your smile was evident in your voice as you gave him a tight squeeze. 鈥淚sn鈥檛 that so much better?鈥
He grumbled a half-hearted complaint about your fingers being cold, but his body language spoke very clearly that he was in pure bliss. His arm slid up to hold across your waist, grip a little stronger than you had expected. His other arm was pulled up against his chest, fist tucked up under his chin. Your breath ghosted over the top of his head, one hand stroking gently through his hair, picking softly and splitting apart hairsprayed strands. The other hand rubbed a line up and down his back with a firm tenderness; every careful touch pulled him into a state of calm that he hadn鈥檛 known for quite some time. A soft, embarrassing sound came from his throat as you pulled your hand away from his back and you chuckled.
鈥淛ust grabbing a blanket, s鈥檛hat okay?鈥 Your voice was somewhere between speaking and whispering.
He nodded against your chest, letting you lean up slightly to grab a blanket and he helped you pull it over your bodies. You tucked it gently up to his chin, sending a small smile down at him when he met your gaze. Your fingers were warmer than before as they slid down from his hair to gently cup his cheek, thumb brushing under his eye.
鈥淵ou comfy?鈥 You smiled brilliantly when he nodded again. 鈥淕ood. Try to get some sleep, yeah? You look like shit.鈥
He huffed out a half-laugh and pressed his cheek back down to your chest. 鈥淓asier said than done.鈥
鈥淵eah, I get that鈥︹ You continued to stroke his hair, apologizing when one of your rings caught and tugged a strand.
Despite his snarky comment, he found himself slipping into the clutches of sleep in your arms. He could hear the rhythm of your heartbeat through your ribs underneath his ear, and he felt the rumble in your chest when you started to quietly hum. His tight grip around you slowly eased as he drifted away from the conscious world, finally letting his tired body rest.
You could feel the moment he fell asleep, could see it in the way his expression relaxed. His eyebrows finally drew up and apart, his lips parting just slightly and the softest snores started to leave through the gap. He looked very pretty like this, all relaxed and peaceful. You leaned down to press a feather-light kiss to his forehead, and eased your head back into the pillow. You squeezed him one more time, his arms unconsciously tightening around you a hair, and you let yourself finally be taken from the world by sleep as well.
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moodymelanist 2 days ago
Feel The Heat
Happy @nestaarcheronweek, everyone! Keeping things short and sweet for my favorite Archeron today 馃挋
Prompt Inspiration: We can鈥檛 go to the main party for reasons but let鈥檚 create a small party for ourselves where we dance to our favourite songs in the living room
Nesta scowled as she stared at the ceiling in her room. She shouldn鈥檛 even be home right now, but she鈥檇 gotten into the worst argument yet with her mother about homecoming, and now she was paying the price.
Well, if Nesta told the story, she was proving her point. All she鈥檇 wanted was to go to homecoming with Cassian, one of her best friends for as long as she could remember, but Rhea hated anything to do with the side of town Cassian was from. That included homecoming dances, and since she鈥檇 been so insistent that Nesta go with that nice Vanserra boy from down the street, Nesta simply refused to go to homecoming at all this year. It had been Cassian or nothing, and she was going to prove her point, goddammit.
What did it even matter that Cassian went to Velaris High and Nesta went to Saint Enalius Preparatory School? He was just as smart as some of the guys in her junior class, and had double the kindness as anyone she鈥檇 ever met. She knew he was going places, and if Rhea couldn鈥檛 see that? It was her problem.
Until then, Nesta was going to sit in her room and make her point. Rhea was wrong about Cassian, and the moment her mother realized that would be the best day of Nesta鈥檚 life.
It was just Nesta and her parents at home. Feyre and Elain had no such issues going to Saint E鈥檚 homecoming 鈥 their dates were respectable in Rhea鈥檚 eyes. No matter that Nesta couldn鈥檛 stand Tamlin or Graysen, or that they treated her sisters like shit; their families had enough money to send them to Prythian Prep, and that was all that mattered.
Who cared that Nesta had actually been looking forward to going to homecoming this year, right? She鈥檇 finally dumped Tomas and Cassian had offered to take her so she wouldn鈥檛 feel awkward about not having a date, but all their plans had gone down the drain the moment Rhea caught wind of it. She couldn鈥檛 even go to Cassian鈥檚 homecoming instead, since it had happened two weeks ago, but she wouldn鈥檛 give her mother the satisfaction of seeing her sulk. She鈥檇 do it all in her room, thank you very much, where nobody could bother her鈥
Nesta froze at the sound of something hitting her window. Had a bird flown into the glass again or something?
The sounds kept coming, and she realized someone must have been throwing something at the glass for it to make a sound like that. There were plenty of little pebbles lying around the property, especially after her father had redone the yard, and she sighed as she got off her bed to see who was bothering her. Maybe Lucien 鈥 the only Vanserra she could actually stand 鈥 had misjudged her window for Elain鈥檚 or something.
Nesta yanked open the window before barely managing to not get hit in the face with a pebble. She had every curse known to man loaded on her tongue, but it died once she realized who was standing outside her window in the first place.
鈥淐assian?鈥 she hissed as loud as she dared. Her idiot best friend just beamed and waved up at her. 鈥淲hat the hell are you doing here?鈥
鈥淟et me in and I鈥檒l tell you,鈥 he said back, careful not to be so loud as to disturb her parents.
Sighing, Nesta moved to pull her window open as far as it could go while Cassian shimmied his way up the tree that leaned close to her window. By the time he鈥檇 managed to get to her room, she鈥檇 already laid down a towel so he wouldn鈥檛 track any grass inside.
鈥淪eriously, what are you doing here?鈥 Nesta asked. 鈥淚 thought Rhys was going to get you in anyway.鈥
鈥淐ome on, you know it wouldn鈥檛 be any fun without you,鈥 Cassian answered with a shrug. He reached up and pulled his hair back into a ponytail, showing off his hard-earned muscles from all those soccer practices. 鈥淒on鈥檛 tell me you鈥檝e been in here sulking this whole time.鈥
鈥淚鈥檓 not sulking,鈥 she responded, pouting. He just gave her a knowing look. 鈥淥kay, maybe I was sulking a little.鈥
鈥淣o sulking allowed,鈥 he told her with a grin. He poked her in one of her secretly-ticklish spots, pulling a little giggle from her. 鈥淎t least not while I鈥檓 here.鈥
鈥淲hat, are you going to tell me to turn my frown upside down?鈥 she asked sarcastically.
Cassian just rolled his eyes before pulling his backpack off his shoulders. 鈥淵ou really have that little faith in me, Nes?鈥
鈥淚 have exactly the right amount of faith, considering all the stupid shit you鈥檝e gotten me involved in,鈥 Nesta replied haughtily. He just laughed quietly before revealing what looked like鈥 flowers?
鈥淚 couldn鈥檛 bring you to homecoming, so I鈥檓 bringing homecoming to you,鈥 he said. He pulled out a matching corsage and boutonni猫re 鈥 red and white roses to match the dress she hadn鈥檛 gotten to wear 鈥 and a bottle of fake champagne. 鈥淭a da.鈥
Nesta was more touched than she鈥檇 been expecting, especially when she realized just how hard Cassian was fighting his incoming sneeze. 鈥淐assian鈥︹
鈥淵eah, yeah,鈥 he replied with a grin. 鈥淕ive me your wrist.鈥
She dutifully gave him her left hand and let him slide the corsage onto her wrist, his hands warm and gentle as they moved. She tried to be just as gentle with pinning the corsage onto his hoodie, but he got pricked a few times before she really got it on there.
鈥淭here,鈥 Cassian announced with a flourish. 鈥淟et鈥檚 toast.鈥
鈥淧lease tell me you washed those before you brought them here,鈥 Nesta responded once she saw the plastic champagne flutes he pulled out of his bag.
鈥淥f course I did,鈥 he answered, rolling his eyes. 鈥淩elax.鈥
She just sighed and let him pour her a glass. It wasn鈥檛 the real thing, but even though it wasn鈥檛 spiked like the drinks at the dance would inevitably be, it still tasted good. 鈥淭hanks.鈥
鈥淵ou鈥檙e welcome.鈥 Cassian took their glasses and placed them rather precariously on the windowsill, ignoring Nesta鈥檚 alarmed look once he turned back around to face her. 鈥淎nd now for the most important part鈥︹
Nesta froze once she realized Cassian was holding his hands out to her like he meant to dance with her. 鈥淲hat are you doing?鈥
鈥淎sking you to dance with me?鈥 Cassian said, the uncertainty in her voice making it sound like a question. 鈥淒on鈥檛 tell me you鈥檙e scared.鈥
鈥淚鈥檓 in my pajamas!鈥 she hissed, motioning down at herself. She鈥檇 been lounging in an oversized Taylor Swift shirt and ratty pair of sweatpants, and her hair was falling out of the loose braid she鈥檇 thrown it back into an hour before.
鈥淪o?鈥 he responded with a shrug. 鈥淚 like you like this.鈥
Nesta flushed, not sure what to do with that. He was her best friend, so she supposed it was his job to make her feel comfortable, but that felt鈥 different. 鈥淔ine. But don鈥檛 step on my feet.鈥
鈥淲ouldn鈥檛 dream of it, sweetheart,鈥 Cassian said confidently. He fiddled with his phone for a few minutes before a song quietly started playing, and he offered her his hands again.
She took them this time, and the two of them swayed back and forth to the beat. He was so solid and warm against her that she couldn鈥檛 help but lean her head against his shoulder as they danced, sighing happily when he laid his head on top of hers. She could feel his chest vibrating slightly as he hummed along with the lyrics, and even though they had to stay quiet so her parents didn鈥檛 hear, it didn鈥檛 stop her from joining him once they got to the chorus.
It wasn鈥檛 the same as dancing in a crowded gym with the rest of the school, but it would do.
tag list: @perseusannabeth | @bookstantrash | @nestaspegasus | @a-court-of-valkyries | @rowaelinismyotp | @live-the-fangirl-life | @sv0430 | @brieq | @positivewitch | @sayosdreams | @nesquik-arccheron | @talkfantasytome | @simpingfornestaarcheron | @vidalinav | @swankii-art-teacher | @that-little-red-head | @secretlovelybeauty | @dustjacketmusings | @katekatpattywack | @claralady | @gwynethhberdara | @duskandstarlight | @arinbelle | @vanserrass | @mrs-shadowsinger04 | @houseofcalores | @imsointobooks | @silvernesta | @planet-faerie | @teagoddess99 | @champanheandluxxury | @catplayinvioline | @flora-shadowshine | @nerdperson524 | @story-scribbler | @dealfea | @snickerdoodlechittybangbang | @charming-butt-insane | @highqueenofelfhame | @julemmaes | @oversizedbats | @readingismyonlyhobby | @milkkand-honey | @wildlyglittering | @thewayshedreamed | @goddess-aelin | @sweet-pea1 | @jmoonjones
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alreadyjackbestfriend 2 days ago
"alone". jack harlow x reader
PAIRING: Jack Harlow x reader
GENRE: angst, angst, angst
TW: depression, family illness
A/N: I know that some of you are waiting for "by another man" part 5, but I've been very busy and I still haven't decided how to continue this story, so here I bring something small in the meantime <3.
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When you met Jack, you were at a point you had never been in your life; after months of therapy and the help of certain medications, you began to feel other emotions besides sadness, and an inexplicable emptiness in your chest. Little by little, you were able to start appreciating and enjoying the little things in life, like having a hot coffee very early in the morning, and it was precisely there where your path coincided with Jack's.
You saw a tall man with curly hair walk through the door, his nose red from the cold and brushing his hands against each other in an attempt to stay warm.
You heard him order some tea, and when he turned around to appreciate the place, while he was waiting for it to be delivered, his gaze fell on you, and without knowing why, you smiled at him. Jack felt that in that moment all the cold evaporated from his body, the warmth of your smile making his cheeks tinge with red.
And the rest was history, eleven months had already passed since that, but at month eight everything had started to decline. Your grandfather had fallen ill, and you no longer had time to attend your appointments with your therapist, and more quickly than expected, your savings ceased to exist, preventing you from buying your medication.
If the first and second month had been hard, without your antidepressants, life was once again becoming unbearable. After helping your grandma take care of your grandpa, you would go straight to your apartment to sleep, or to cry. You didn't have the time or the desire to cook, so you just didn't eat, you didn't put makeup on anymore so you just poured some water on your face and brushed your teeth before forgetting about the world for a few hours.
Jack was away from you, and you made less and less effort to answer his calls, or to appear happy in text messages. You loved him, but your mind was winning the battle again.
You were waking up when you heard knocking on the door. You tried to cover your head with the covers and go back to sleep, but the pounding did not stop. Angry, you finally got out of bed and walked to the front door, ready to yell at whoever was bothering you, but the words caught in your throat at the sight of your boyfriend. He was serious, you could see that he didn't come to give you a nice surprise, but to resolve issues.
鈥淐an I come in?鈥
鈥淪ure鈥︹ you were confused by his lack of affection, but you couldn't get anything back at him if you didn't even answer his calls, right? 鈥淚 didn't know you would be back so soon鈥
鈥渘either do I. but i guess my girlfriend not answering my calls for a month was enough to make me take an emergency flight鈥
鈥淛ack鈥 I鈥檓 sorry鈥 I鈥
鈥淚 already know everything, y/n, maybe I've only known you for eleven months, but I've really tried my best and I think I've done well, and I knew coming here first wasn't going to get me answers.鈥
you swallowed hard. jack did not know about your depression, in these months you had thought that there was no need to tell him. nor about your grandfather's illness, for what? you had always been able to endure everything alone, and you didn't want to drive him away with your problems, but you had done it anyway.
鈥渨here did you go?鈥
鈥渄oes it really matter?鈥
鈥渢o your grandma鈥檚鈥
鈥渨hat did she tell you?鈥
鈥渆verything, y/n, everything you should have told me to be the boyfriend you need and you haven't let me be. I don't understand, is it that you don't trust me?鈥
"Jack" you said, closing your eyes, in a desperate attempt not to tear them up, "it's not that."
"So what is it?"
You opened your eyes, and two tears instantly ran down your cheeks, "I... I didn't want you to see me this way, I wanted you to remember me as in the months we were able to spend together, the happiest months of my life..." you sniffed, trying to dry your tears, "I didn't want you to know this version, the real me, the one I've been all my life"
鈥渢his is not the real you, y/n, this is you trying to live without help鈥 he said, walking up to you and putting his hands on your arms, "and I can help you, y/n, and I want to, because I love you."
you closed your eyes, shaking your head, "this is not your obligation, Jack, I have to take care of myself"
"why? you don't have to go through everything in your life alone, y/n"
鈥測es I have to, I don't want to drag you down with me鈥
鈥淵ou won't, I promise, we'll get through it together鈥
鈥渘o, Jack!鈥 you said, letting go of his grasp.
"why are you so stubborn?!" Jack took his hair between his fingers, pulling it. he was desperate, he didn't know what to do to convince you, and he was hurt because he wanted to be a safe space for you, he thought he was, but you had made it clear that he wasn't. you kept quiet, crying, and you were like that for a couple of seconds, before jack spoke again, 鈥測ou鈥檙e gonna make us both miserable, you know that, right?鈥
鈥淚 know. But I'd rather you be miserable just for a while, and then you can find a girl with a good heart, and a bubbly personality鈥
鈥淵ou have a good heart.鈥
鈥淎nd I don鈥檛 want a bubbly personality, I want you!鈥
鈥淚 have a lot of problems, Jack.鈥
鈥渟o what you鈥檙e saying is I don鈥檛 love you enough to deal with that?鈥
鈥渨hat I鈥檓 saying鈥︹ you breath deeply, 鈥渋s that I love you too much to let you deal with this. It鈥檚 not fair to you, and I鈥檝e been dealing with this alone all my life鈥︹
鈥渢hat鈥檚 not love, y/n, that鈥檚 fear鈥
You looked at him, feeling defeated, 鈥渕aybe I don鈥檛 love myself enough to let you do it鈥
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elius-learns-to-write a day ago
The one with a plan:
Being friends with Nat goes sideways when you remember that she is a trained spy who is not against forming a plan to get her two favourite people together. @i-writes-things
I took this a little bit out of the request hope you still enjoy!
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If someone would鈥檝e told you 2 years ago that you were going to become an avenger then you would鈥檝e probably believed them. I mean you had superhuman abilities so stranger things had happened. You had been scouted for 鈥楾he Avengers Initiative鈥 by Fury himself after you had been put on their radar聽 after a little accident including an old woman, a shopping trolley and some fire (in your defence that was an accident and if she would鈥檝e had moved and not stolen out of your cart then it wouldn鈥檛 have happened). That was how you met your now best friend Natasha Romanoff.聽
Inseparable. With all the words the others could use to describe your friendship with Nat, that was the one that sprung to mind first. While you might have been younger that didn鈥檛 mean you were any less of a dynamic duo! After 2 years on the team doing missions that ranged from starting fires in the basement of a Hydra base to destroying information to making sure that some rich man had proper security for an event, you could safely say that your makeshift family was very very close. Way too close if they asked you. However no one did. That鈥檚 why you would continue to sit on Nats bed for at least an hour a night as you swapped stories about new recruits and how much you hated them.
That was how you had learnt about Peter Parker or Web Boy as Nat affectionately called him. You had been talking to Nat about the usual things; the one new agent who couldn鈥檛 keep his mouth shut, that one girl who constantly 鈥榞ot lost鈥 and wandered into the living quarters on nearly a weekly basis, and that one person who just didn鈥檛 know what they were doing. You aren鈥檛 too sure what they鈥檙e doing here if you鈥檙e being honest but that鈥檚 above your pay grade so that makes it someone else's problem.聽
That was until she decided to bring the new web slinger into the conversation. 鈥淭ony is obsessed with the kid, it鈥檚 endearing in a strange way鈥 Nat sighed as she flopped herself onto the bed 鈥淣at you think everything is strange about Tony, anyway I鈥檓 sure he鈥檚 sweet enough. At the very least he won't be totally clueless鈥 you laughed. How have you become the level headed one in this friendship? 鈥淚 wouldn鈥檛 be so sure,鈥 she paused, taking an overly dramatic breath 鈥測ou know he鈥檚 about your age, it鈥檇 be nice to finally have someone your age hanging around the compound鈥 another pause 鈥渘o pun intended鈥. You had to laugh at that, how could someone with a kill count larger than even the richest man's bank account be making puns without trying?! 鈥淣atasha, whatever you are thinking, I want you to stop. I have you guys! I don鈥檛 need any new friends鈥 you spoke fiddling with the edge of the fluffy blanket you had stolen from Natasha the second you entered her room. 鈥淚 wasn鈥檛 thinking about anything!鈥 Oh you definitely didn鈥檛 like that look on her face.
Coincidentally you had met Peter a few days after your conversation with Nat. Well, more slammed into him as you turned a corner but first impressions aren鈥檛 everything. 鈥淲hoa hey I am so so so sorry鈥 the boy stuttered, the tips of his ears turning a red that you were pretty sure matched the colour of Nat鈥檚 hair. 鈥淚t鈥檚 nothing really,聽 I should've been looking where I was going, it's not your fault鈥. It was his fault but when a stuttering cute boy slams into you, you don鈥檛 tell him that he is in the wrong. You had been on your way to a training session with Steve that you would鈥檝e rather avoided anyway. 鈥淎re you the new arachnid on the team?鈥 you questioned. You knew the answer, you just wanted to see how long you could put off turning into super soldier soup. 鈥淯h yeah I am Spider Parker. I mean Peter man. I鈥檓 sorry Peter Parker nice to meet you鈥 he chuckled, rubbing a hand nervously behind his neck, finding a very interesting stain on the cold tiles. 鈥淵/n. I鈥檒l see you around bug boy鈥.
From there your relationship with Peter flourished. You quickly found yourself seeking out his company whenever he came to visit (which did result in a semi permanent ban from Tony鈥檚 lab after a freak screw driver accident). The seeking out of company wasn鈥檛 just one way though, Peter found himself gravitating towards you whenever you were near. He also found himself thinking about you a whole lot more than he should鈥檝e. There was no chance in hell that he was going to do something about it though, why would he? This was his first 鈥榮uper hero gig鈥, his first time joining the big guns. Why would he jeopardise that? He was also deathly afraid of Natasha which certainly didn鈥檛 help.聽
鈥淓arth to Peter Parker鈥 you shouted, throwing a pillow at his head, giggling a little as he jumped 鈥渟orry off in my own world鈥 he replied, the same blush you saw on him when you met coating his cheeks once again. He had come to your room for your now weekly movie nights (which had all started after you confessed you hadn't watched any of the starwars movies) but honestly he had spent more time thinking about you than he had spent time watching the movies. It had become obvious when you let the credits roll and didn鈥檛 get his normal summary of the movie. 鈥淩ight Parker, what are we doing now?鈥 you asked more to yourself as you debated on whether to paint his nails or make him put a face mask on with you. 鈥淒o not think about putting a face mask on me, I don鈥檛 need Captain America hearing me cry鈥 he warned, which would have seemed a little bit scarier if it weren't for the plethora of pillows piled around him. 鈥淔ine then nails it is鈥.
If only you would鈥檝e seen the look on Nat鈥檚 face as she walked past the room to see you in a fit of giggles after peter spilt nail polish on his joggers. She couldn鈥檛 stand to watch you idiots dance around each other anymore. This called for a team intervention. Operation 鈥楪et the idiots together鈥 was officially in action.
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People would鈥檝e thought that being an avenger meant that you were on high alert every minute of every day. However, put someone's crush in front of them and they apparently forget every ounce of training they鈥檝e learnt. That was how you ended up getting shoved into a utility closet from the red head you loved most. With the boy you had a crush on nonetheless! 鈥淩ight you two are not allowed out until something happens because looking at the both of you makes me want to tear my hair out鈥 her muffled voice came through the door. Groaning you both knew that unless one of you admitted your feelings (that you were entirely sure only went one way) you were not getting out of this. 鈥淧arker I swear I have no idea why she鈥檚 doing this' ' you pleaded with the boy, who when forced into a confined room with you didn't seem able to look you in the eye. 鈥淚- I might have some idea as to what she鈥檚 referring to鈥 finally he looked up at you, you could see something in his eyes, an emotion that you didn鈥檛 recognise on him. 鈥淧arker if this is some prank I鈥檇 pay very close attention to your shampoo bottles for the next couple of months鈥 you gritted out. Although there was no way that you thought he would do something like this to you it wouldn't be the first time hair remover ended up in the wrong bottle. Just ask Bucky. 鈥淣o! It鈥檚 not I promise鈥 he stopped 鈥渢he other day Mr stark asked me to order some food to the compound, we were working on this new suit of his and we hadn鈥檛 eaten in a while and well we were kinda hungry鈥 one thing you would say about Peter is when he went on ramble nothing would stop him. Well almost nothing. 鈥淧eter, your point?鈥 you cut him off, listening to small spaces did nothing for your heart rate and you wanted out. 鈥淩ight sorry, I went onto his phone and he hadn鈥檛 shut his messages, he was on a group chat started by Nat called 鈥極peration get the idiots together鈥 and well yeah鈥 oh. OH. Nat was so dead when you got out. 鈥淟ook Peter I am so so sorry that you were forced into a cupboard, I swear I didn鈥檛 want you to find out like this and if you never want to talk to me again that鈥檚 completely fine by me, well it鈥檚 not fine but I鈥檇 respect it鈥 it seemed the both of you were as bad as each other when it came to word vomit.聽 鈥淵ou feel the same way?鈥 Now that is how you effectively shut someone up. 鈥淵es- hang on, did you just say the same?!鈥 your exclamation was soon cut off by F.R.I.D.A.Y鈥檚 voice 鈥渙peration 鈥榞et the idiots together鈥 complete. Lock-down lifted鈥
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hikariasanare a day ago
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Pairing: Morpheus x FemaleReader
Rating: PG
Words: 1072
Warning: death of the character聽
Notes: Kind of Soulmate AU, OC鈥檚 name is Elaine, but you can change it
Summary: Morpheus and Elaine was bounded a long time ago. But Morpheus was trying to avoid her, because she was human and such relationship was forbidden. But destiny has another opinion on that and very weird humour.聽
1783 year
Morpheus POV
What I鈥檓 doing here? Why Destiny called me here, to the Waking world? And exactly in this place, which full of mortals. Such a waste of time.聽
I was ready to leave, when my eyes catch a woman figure. She was young, not more than 20 years old. She was graceful, with blond hair and green eyes. She was wearing a green dress. She was warm and bright, like a ray of sunshine. She was talking to the older woman, who looks like a servant or governess. And At this moment, girl turn her head and look at me. And forget what she was talking. She couldn鈥檛 see me, but she was looking straight into my eyes.聽
I felt, this meeting wasn鈥檛 a coincidence. This girl...Elaine...was bounded to me. But she was a human, and it was not possible. It was a cruel joke of the Destiny. To bound me to the human and know that we can鈥檛 be together.聽
I broke the eye contact with the girl, though it was difficult. And decided to take a visit my brother. When I was already in the Destiny鈥檚 garden, he came to me.
鈥淲hat a pleasure to meet you, little brother鈥, - he said calmly. 鈥 Is something wrong?鈥
鈥淵ou know yourself鈥, said I abruptly.聽 鈥淵ou bounded me to the human. Why? Is it some attempt to destroy me?鈥
鈥淲hy to destroy?鈥 he answered with a sigh. 鈥淵ou are too self-centered. It鈥檚 a gift. I noticed that you are still not quite yourself after your last relationship.鈥
鈥淭hat鈥檚 not a concern of yours鈥, said I angrily. 鈥淎nd the bound with the human is the curse. Not a gift".聽
鈥淲hy not?鈥澛 he shrugged with a shoulder.聽 鈥淲e will see.鈥
I don鈥檛 want to talk to him anymore and returned to home. But if I thought, that avoid her will be easy, it was wrong. Every time when I was in Waking world, she was there.聽
A century later, Death invited to come with her to the ball. And Elaine was there again. This time she was wearing a white dress and a lot of man looked were staring at her. And then she looked at me again, like she felt that I was there. And the all world seemed to disappear.聽
鈥淕o to her鈥, whispered Death.聽鈥淒ance. Meanwhile, I managed my amends鈥.聽
Maybe it was a bad idea, but I make a step toward a girl anyway.
鈥淒o we know each other?鈥澛 she asked. She looked at me, like she was trying to remember.
鈥淣ot yet鈥, I answered.
鈥淪o... do you dance?鈥澛 she ashed.
聽鈥淣o鈥, said I.聽
鈥淏ut maybe just one dance you can survive?鈥澛 she smiled and suddenly took my hand and dragged me to the dance floor.聽
I felt, like her hears was beating fast, and she blushed. She wasn鈥檛 used to ask someone herself. And people around us start to whisper.聽
鈥淛ust one dance?鈥澛 she asked pleadingly, and I couldn鈥檛 say聽鈥渘o鈥 to her.聽
鈥淰ery well鈥 - I answered and then put one hand on her waist and took her hand in another. She blushed more and looked into my eyes.
I can regret this, but I needed to disappear from her life after the dance. She will forget about me. But right at this moment, I couldn鈥檛 take my eyes off her. I felt the need, that I thought was long forgotten. But if I gave in, consequences will be bad. I shouldn鈥檛 stay among the humans.聽
鈥淵ou are a good dancer, Stranger鈥, she smiled.
鈥淪o are you鈥, I answered, and At this moment the dance ended.聽
鈥淭hank you鈥, she whispered with a smile.聽
鈥溌營 need to go鈥, I said and hurried to, lost in the crowd. And then I left the building.聽
Death caught me on the street and looked at me confused.
鈥淲hat was that?鈥澛 she asked.聽鈥淚 thought you don鈥檛 dance. And why are you run away?鈥
鈥淵ou know why鈥, I hissed.聽
鈥淥h, so it鈥檚 the girl, that bound to you鈥, she understood. 鈥淲hy did you leave her?鈥
鈥淵ou know, very well, that these connections end up badly鈥. I answered.聽 鈥淐onnections between humans and Endless.鈥澛
And I return to my kingdom, because I don鈥檛 want to continue this conversation. I shouldn鈥檛 dance with her. I need to disappear right away.聽
But I still met her accidentally from time to time. On the streets, in the parks. One time I saw her drawing. It seemed Destiny won鈥檛 give up so easily.聽 So I didn鈥檛 visit Waking world for a long time. Until that day after the meeting with Hob, when I left abruptly. And I had to find one run away Nightmare. All of these was taken me by a sudden. She was in the street and, as always stunned, when she saw me.聽
鈥淚鈥檓 sorry, I must be lost鈥, she said.
I make a few steps toward her. And then something happened that I couldn鈥檛 predict or stop. A nightmare attacked her. The long claws made a terrible wound on her stomach. I raised a hand to uncreate nightmare and caught the wounded girl before she felt on the ground.聽
鈥淣o鈥, I whispered.聽鈥淭hat can鈥檛 be happening鈥.聽
At that moment, Death appeared. She looked at me with sad eyes.聽
鈥淚t鈥檚 her time to go鈥, she said sadly.聽
I looked at her, and she already was looking at me. I saw recognition and tenderness in her eyes. She raised her hand and touch my cheek.
鈥淚 know you鈥, it were her last words.聽
And my sister took her, while I was still trying to understand how this could have happened. I understood that being with me was dangerous. We shouldn鈥檛 meet in any of her lives. It was a terrible idea from the beginning.聽
Elaine鈥檚 POV
鈥淚 didn鈥檛 want to go there anyway鈥, I said.聽鈥淚t鈥檚 all the same: music, dances and a lot of people鈥.聽
鈥淚 know that you like dances鈥, said Violet, my friend.聽鈥淢aybe you will meet your destiny there鈥.聽
鈥淚 highly doubt so鈥, answered I, but I saw the man in black and with eyes like stars in my head.
Suddenly I felt a strong pain in my chest. I dropped the book, that I was holding. Violet looked at me with worry.
鈥淓laine, what鈥檚 wrong?鈥 she asked.
鈥淚 don鈥檛 know鈥, I answered. I felt dizzy, and my sight was blackened. I was falling, hearing Violet voice in a distance. She was calling for help. But I saw a picture of a naked man on the stone floor in front of my eyes. And then I fall asleep.聽
P.S. English is not my first language, so please don鈥檛 criticize me very much. But I still hope you like it. And I will be glad of your comments.聽
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grievedeeply a day ago
Howdy! Could I request some dating headcanons for Magni and Modi (separately)? I do enjoy some chronic dumbasses. Love your writing and hope you're having a great day!
these will be pretty short because of the lack of content and information we have with them, but i really loved their boss fight in the first game and i wish we saw more of them :( hope you enjoy anyways!
gn!reader | no tws! join my taglist!!
dating magni and modi headcanons
magni doesn't fall in love easily, so if you've managed to win over his heart consider yourself lucky
he's VERY popular so everyone will know who you are within a few days of your relationship starting. of course, people will be jealous. he is thor's son, and people want a chance to be with him
he brushes them off. if someone flirts with him, he laughs. it's a condescending laugh, too. definitely makes you feel good to know that even though he has all of those people at his feet, he still only has eyes for you
i think of him as a bit of a romantic. he takes you out on dates relatively frequently. he thinks bonding like that is important in relationships and he enjoys spending the time with you
he isn't very big on pda, but in private he's quite touchy. the most he'll do in public is have an arm around your shoulders or something similar. behind closed doors, he's willing to be intimate
he loves having those moments with you. they're special to him and you help to take his mind off his dysfunctional, strange family
he's a passionate kisser. always a bit rough. he'll kiss you in public if he feels he has to. he does get jealous quite easily for some reason, even though he knows full well he has no competition. you love him too much for that
he does love you. he has some trouble expressing it some days, but he doesn't have to say the words. he'll tell you through his actions, too <3
modi is incredibly self conscious. he has always been second to his brother, and he knows that if anyone were to fall for one of thor's sons, it would be magni they would pursue
though.. when you come along, it's like his whole life turned upside down. you're interested in him, and only him. he falls for you VERY quickly. so fast, it almost embarrasses him
in a relationship, he's wary of his every move鈥 worried you'll leave him for someone better. you know of his childhood and issues with his family, so you'll reassure him whenever he needs it. it's never a problem for you
he loves holding you. it grounds him and makes him remember that you're his, and he should have nothing to worry about
he isn't big on affection in public, either. even in private, he still gets a little embarrassed. it's very sweet to see how nervous you make him
he kisses you as if he's worried he'll break you. you'll have to tell him if you want him to change that. he'll always feel like you're a piece of glass. a beautiful work of art
he wants to keep his relationship with you relatively private. he knows people are interested in his family, but he wants to protect you from their prying, judgmental eyes, if he can
as a boyfriend, he's kind. but he is scared of messing up somehow. he won't. you know that
tags: @graciegizmo3184 @anzanishira @chocokaylarobin @uncoveredsun @caelestis-lyrae @prio-motu @bluehorizon987 @freyrees @ieatmarbles @rohansregret @konigd1cks0ck @smilesdarling @huan-chan @rustypotatospork @onlydeas @luna-charlie @orangeflavouredwitch @hayleethefrog @dott-up @imcomingforyourskin @itsnat-bitch @mimothemoth
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kendsleyauthor 2 days ago
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All Dolled Up
Print / Trinket Universe
~3000 words
Warnings: 鉀擬inors DNI鉀, CNC, dehumanization, fearplay, mouthplay
Summary: After rescuing you from an auction, Lee has no choice but to bring you along to a dangerous dinner appointment. He promises to keep you safe, but are you prepared to play along?
The plot of this story came from an anonymous reader, and it inspired me to try 2nd person POV for the first time!聽Please mind the warnings and do not proceed if you are uncomfortable with such themes!
@marydublinauthor鈥 馃尭
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鈥淚 only had this room for one night,鈥 Lee聽explains over the meal.聽
You sit at the edge of his room-service platter and lick sauce from your fingers. You haven鈥檛 had enough time to master the art of eating as a trinket鈥攏ot neatly, anyway. The fact that you鈥檙e eating next to a giant without fear is a miracle. Manners are the least of your worries.
鈥淲hat does that mean?鈥 you ask.
He twists his fork in his hand absently. The prongs are longer than your arm. The meal is more for you than him. He is about to attend a dinner shortly.
鈥淚t means I have to take you with me to the meeting. There aren鈥檛 any other agents in the area to collect you. And, well鈥 This is an important recon mission. If I cancel, it鈥檚 not likely I鈥檒l get another invite.鈥
The worry on his face is clear. It鈥檚 hard to misinterpret facial expressions at your three-inch height. You purse your lips uncertainly. 鈥淲hat do you need me to do?鈥
Lee explains as he clears away the plates and piles them on one side of the table. You listen as best you can; it鈥檚 hard to focus while watching someone move room-sized dishes over your head so effortlessly. He leaves you briefly to rummage through his overnight bag. He plucks up tiny clothes between his fingers, glancing over at you as he considers the present options. Finally, he settles on a pretty red dress鈥攖he kind you might have worn while bar-hopping in your past life.
He looks away politely as you change into it on the table, and when you ask for help tying it off in the back, his fingers are gentle and precise. You hold still as he tugs the silken straps into a little knot.
鈥淚鈥檒l keep you in my pocket the whole time if I can,鈥 he says. His voice is a rumble behind you, his breath warm as he leans in close to make sure the knot is perfect. 鈥淏ut, here鈥檚 the thing鈥 If I do have to take you out, you need to act scared. Or these people will be suspicious. Do you understand?鈥
When his fingers release you, you turn around and meet the overwhelmingly blue gaze before you. 鈥淥kay, Lee,鈥 you say softly.
鈥淎nd you can鈥檛 call me that. It鈥檚 too casual, and I鈥檓 not going by my real name, anyway. Just call me 鈥榮ir鈥 like your life depends on it.鈥
Your face flushes, and you nod, speechless.
His expression softens, and he gingerly takes your hand between his finger and thumb. 鈥淏est case scenario, you stay hidden the whole night. But if that can鈥檛 happen, please remember that I won鈥檛 hurt you, no matter what. I won鈥檛 let anyone touch you, either. They鈥檒l know you鈥檙e mine.鈥
Once you have agreed to the rules, he seems to relax somewhat and goes to pack his bag. When he returns to the table, he gingerly picks you up and slides you into his front pocket. You are still getting used to being handled, yet you are certain you will never find hands gentler than his.
You sway in the darkness of Lee鈥檚 pocket as he makes his way downstairs, through the lobby, and out the door to hail a self-driving cab. He doesn鈥檛 acknowledge you as he rides; after all, these vehicles have cameras inside of them. As far as either of you are concerned, you cannot exist鈥攏ot in this world where your existence on his person would get him arrested for unlawful possession of government property.
Yesterday, however, you very much existed. You were the center of attention. It is incredible how your life has been flipped on its head several times in the span of a few days. You were destined for the black market before your consciousness transfer was even complete鈥攕old by a lab tech to be auctioned off as a rare 鈥渦ntouched鈥 trinket, fresh from the Facility.聽
Lee won you easily, and the moment he had you alone, he quickly proved himself to be kind and sweet. Last night was pleasant and calm. But now, his tension has transformed him into an entirely different person.
The car slows to a stop, and once again, you experience the sway of his pocket. He told you the meeting point was a fancy restaurant. It was owned by an underground trinket seller and was an exclusive spot for prospective buyers to meet. Lee needs to get in good with these people to uncover the extent of their operation. It鈥檚 a careful job that requires the utmost professionalism.聽
You鈥檙e tempted to peek out when you hear voices, but you don鈥檛 move a muscle, just like Lee whispered to you on the way in. Amazing that you can be entirely present without being noticed at all.聽
There are three voices鈥攖he seller, whose name is Edwin, and two other prospective buyers. Lee is going by the name of Pierce. The conversation seems to go well at the get-go. The men introduce themselves, and they order their dinner. There is a clear shift in the air when Edwin offers to order complimentary drinks with trinkets in them.
Maybe it is reflexive, but Lee casually turns down the offer.
鈥淲hat the matter, Pierce?鈥 Edwin says, his voice taking on a note of suspicion. 鈥淣ot interested in sampling my merchandise?鈥
Lee draws in a sharp breath that only you are aware of, being so small and near him. To the others, maybe it can be excused as a mischievous chuckle. You can feel his hesitation and his heartbeat, and then there is a rustle of fabric as his fingers slide into his pocket over your head. You stay perfectly still as his hand wraps around you and pulls you out.
鈥淚鈥檓 just saying, I brought my own entertainment,鈥 Lee says smoothly. 鈥淚t鈥檒l take a lot of convincing to get me to try yours. I鈥檒l take that drink, though.鈥
You remember what Lee said about how you should behave. You draw in a shuddering breath, bordering on a whimper, and you squirm uncomfortably in his grasp. He hushes you and strokes your hair, his touch lingering like he is savoring the sensation. You peek out at the rest of the table. The other men eye you with delight, and you remind yourself to Lee promised that they will not touch you.
But that means you have to play your part.
You tremble and close your eyes, ducking your head.
That seems to do the trick, as far as suspicions are concerned.
As the men discuss their business dealings over your head, Lee鈥檚 hand ceaselessly plays with you on the white tablecloth. He strokes your side, takes your arm or leg between his fingers, forces you closer or further away as he pleases.
When his wine arrives, he plucks you up by your sides and holds you over it. You give a cry and kick your legs in protest, but he just smirks at you and raises his eyebrows matter-of-factly.聽
鈥淒on鈥檛 fuss,鈥 he says. 鈥淲hy do you think I had you wear red? Now, settle down.鈥 His fingers give you the slightest squeeze.
鈥淵-yes, sir,鈥 you whimper.
He lowers you into his wine. You brace your hands against the glass, eyes stinging from the alcohol. The wine is up to your chin, but it threatens to cover your mouth and nose as Lee lifts the glass to sample his drink. Wine rushes past you and drags you along. Just before you鈥檙e about to touch his upper lip, he straightens the glass and leaves you shivering in a smaller pool. His tongue briefly swipes his lips, savoring the wine鈥攁nd you.
You endure this until dinner arrives. As Lee downs the last of his wine, he leaves the glass sideways at his mouth, and his lips brush against you. His teeth graze your shoulder, as though his contemplating pulling you into his mouth completely.聽
But he straightens the glass, making you slide back down to the bottom of your prison. Your moment of reprieve lasts for only a few minutes before his attention turns to you again. After a few bites of food, he decides that he wants you closer. He reaches into the glass and plucks you out, dripping with wine. Setting you at the edge of his plate, you can鈥檛 help but think about your peaceful meal just an hour prior.聽
Now, you have three other men leering at you. You are surrounded in all directions, and they are not shy about making their desires known.
While Lee fondles you through your wet dress, one of the buyers says, 鈥淲hen am I getting a turn?鈥 It sounds like he鈥檚 only half-joking.
Lee鈥檚 smile is cutting. 鈥淚 don鈥檛 share,鈥 he says simply. No one questions him again, but it doesn鈥檛 stop them from giving suggestions.
The other buyer looks at you hungrily. 鈥淒on鈥檛 you think she鈥檒l get sick if she stays in that wet dress all night?鈥
That is all the warning you get before Lee hoists you up again. He drops you into his open palm and turns you around rather than asking you to do it yourself. His fingertips tug at the knot he had made earlier. His efforts jolt you back and forth harshly. The moment the knot comes loose, he turns you over again and paws at your neckline.
You squirm and gasp, trying to shove his fingers away, but he overpowers you with mere twitches of his fingers. The neckline comes down, putting your bare breasts in full view. One of the men wolf-whistles. Lee drags down the rest of the dress, wiggling it past your hips and along your legs until you are left wearing nothing but a pair of black panties.
Dessert arrives just in time. He fondles you on his plate, pausing only to put you to work. He orders you to grab a strawberry slice from the elegant cheesecake. You try to do as you鈥檙e told, but you can鈥檛 reach the slice without getting messy. You inadvertently smear yourself with whipped cream when he tells you to hurry up. The moment you grab the fruit, he plucks you up and holds you near his mouth. Catching on, you feed him the slice, shivering as his tongue drags over your arms as he takes it. He licks up the excess whipped cream on your skin after he chews and swallows.
Finally, dinner is over. Lee has played his part well. Edwin insists on taking them all to a bar down the street, and Lee doesn鈥檛 dare say no. He pockets you and follows along.
They get a private booth in the back, and once there are no bartenders or waitresses around to see, Lee pulls you back out of his pocket.
The men drink and drink. You are soaked in different alcohols until you鈥檙e certain that the scent will forever be part of you. For a time, Lee is content enough to just hold you close on the table. You give his finger a squeeze when the other men look like they might get bold enough to reach for you.聽
But when Lee becomes handsy, you tremble and try to maneuver away, only to have him drag you back in place. The others chortle at every one of your failed attempts to get away.
Edwin eyes you, and you worry for a moment that he鈥檚 going to suggest that he buy from Lee instead of sell. Instead, he swirls the drink in his hand and leans closer with a drunken smile.
鈥淚鈥檓 not usually one for drinking games,鈥 Edwin slurs. 鈥淏ut I do have a favorite. You know that cherry stem knot game? Well鈥︹ He smiles down at you as if you are in on the fun, and then he looks back up at Lee. 鈥淗ow fast do you think you can get the little one鈥檚 panties off?鈥
You don鈥檛 hear the rest of the rumbling exchange of the bet overhead. You stagger back on shaking legs and turn to run, but you don鈥檛 make it very far before Lee walls you off with his hand. You think he鈥檚 about to close that hand and trap you, but instead, he leans in closer and closer until you are cornered between his hand and mouth.聽
鈥淣o, don鈥檛!鈥 you weep, trying to duck away while the other men cheer. 鈥淧-please, don鈥檛!鈥
Hot darkness consumes your world as his mouth closes around you. Your stomach flips as he straightens back up. For a moment, he simply seems to savor your taste, rolling you from side to side on his tongue like a piece of candy. Then he remembers his goal. Despite your efforts to squirm to the front of his mouth, he is able to maneuver you with just his tongue and teeth.
You cry out as his teeth lock around your torso鈥攏ot enough to hurt, but enough to keep you firmly in place. His tongue probes between your legs, slick and burning as it searches for the edge of your panties. He repositions you once his tongue has some semblance of grasp on the fabric, shifting it over to his teeth to grab a firm hold. Then his tongue forces you to the other side, your panties dragging down your legs.
The moment your kicking legs are free of your only bit of clothing, he spits you out onto his palm. You look up dizzily as he sticks his tongue out with your panties on the tip.
Judging by the guffaws and crows of the others, Lee has won a permanent piece of respect.
After that, the night is finally over.聽
Lee stuffs you back into his pocket and calls another cab. Just as you鈥檙e wondering where you鈥檙e going, he calls the hotel and says that he鈥檒l need another room for the night. His trip is extending longer than expected.
Once again, he does not acknowledge you during the ride.
When he arrives in his new room, he lets you out of his pocket immediately. He doesn鈥檛 quite look at you as he draws a bath in a warm cup and lets you change into a set of clean clothes in privacy. Once you鈥檙e finished, you call for him, and he鈥檚 at your side in an instant.聽
He scoops you up into a gentle grasp and runs his thumb clumsily down your wet hair. Then to your surprise, his eyes well up with tears.
鈥淔uck,鈥 he says. 鈥淚鈥檓 so fucking sorry. I went too far. Please forgive me, I鈥斺 He hisses and shakes his head. 鈥淔uck that... You don鈥檛 have to forgive me. Once I get you to the base, you don鈥檛 even have to look at me again, I swear.鈥
Despite his disgust with himself, he can鈥檛 seem to put you down. He looks you over carefully, making sure you鈥檙e alright. His gaze is unfocused. He鈥檚 utterly drunk from the night, and his tears are falling faster the longer he looks at you.
鈥淟ee!鈥 you say, finally finding your voice. You hug his finger tightly. 鈥淚鈥檓 fine! I promise I鈥檓 fine鈥攑lease, don鈥檛 cry.鈥 He shakes his head and closes his eyes at the sound of your tiny voice. You tap his finger insistently. 鈥淚t鈥檚 been a long night. Have a glass of water and go to bed.鈥
He looks at you like he can鈥檛 comprehend what you鈥檙e saying. 鈥淏ut鈥︹
鈥淣ow, Lee,鈥 you insist. 鈥淲ater and bed. Please.鈥
He pouts like a child, like he might argue with you. But he鈥檚 too out of it to do anything but obey those simple directions. He sets you up like he did last night, folding up one of his clean shirts for you to nestle yourself into. The folds are untidy this time around, but the gesture is sweet all the same. He sets your makeshift bed on the spare pillow, and he is out like a light on the other side.
The next morning, he wakes before you. When you open your eyes, he is staring at you with sorrow and guilt, his head still resting on the pillow across from yours. He starts to apologize again, but you sit up and hold your hand up to stop him.
Although he is no longer drunk, he follows your silent command.
鈥淟ee,鈥 you tell him. 鈥淚t鈥檚 okay. It really is. I know you didn鈥檛 mean all those things last night. I could feel your fingers shaking every time you touched me.鈥
鈥淏ut鈥 still. That was too much. Too far. I鈥檓 so sorry.鈥 He looks like he might cry again. 鈥淚 can鈥檛 even imagine how terrified you must鈥檝e been.鈥
You swallow hard and feel heat creep to your cheeks. You weren鈥檛 planning on telling him this, but the poor thing looks so upset with himself. 鈥淚 was never really scared,鈥 you admit. 鈥淲ell鈥 okay, yes, I was scared. Terrified. But in a good way.鈥
His eyebrows pull together, puzzled. 鈥淚 know I told you to play a part,鈥 he says. 鈥淏ut鈥 it looks so real. Like you were really, really scared. Like you were ready to fall apart.鈥
鈥淏ut I knew I was safe.鈥 You hold your hand out, beckoning him to give you his hand. He hesitantly brings his hand close. You stroke the knuckles of his index finger soothingly, blushing harder. Now you鈥檙e the one who can hardly look at him. 鈥淚, um鈥 I kind of liked it?鈥 You bite your lip and peek up.
As you predicted, he looks utterly bewildered.
鈥淚鈥檝e always been a bit of an exhibitionist,鈥 you say quickly, like ripping off a band-aid.
鈥淥h, my god.鈥 He shuts his eyes for a second, processing. When he opens them again, they are alight with humor and relief. 鈥淵ou little shit! I thought I was traumatizing you.鈥
You shrug sheepishly. 鈥淚鈥檇 be happy to do it again if you need me to. If you ever need someone to help keep your cover, that is. As long as you promise to keep me safe.鈥
His hand shifts suddenly, his finger leaving your grasp. You find yourself in his gentle hold instead. He kisses the top of your head, his lips lingering as a warm chuckle spills over you. 鈥淚 think we can work something out,鈥 he purrs.
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(Author鈥檚 note: Would you trust Lee to keep you safe? 馃憖 I know I would. 馃グ)
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thoodleoo 21 hours ago
hey I just wanted to ask you something, I had a post come across my dash of yours from October about grieving as an adult (specifically it mentioned a dentist appointment if you don鈥檛 remember it lol) and I just wanted to ask if it was ok to reblog. I know it *has* been reblogged a lot and I didn鈥檛 see it marked otherwise/reblogs turned off otherwise but. I did find it very relatable and I鈥檓 kind of in my own personal grief feelings right now and I didn鈥檛 want to rub salt in someone else鈥檚 haha. Anyway hope you鈥檙e doing well and have a good day,
you're welcome to reblog it if it resonates with you. i would have turned reblogs off if i didn't want people passing it around.
the nice thing about grief is that we are not alone in it; in many ways my dear stazzi's memory is preserved in that post, so i don't mind it getting shared.
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rewatching-sam-and-dean 2 days ago
The Pilot (Part 2)
Thanks so much to everyone who checked out my Part 1 post!
To see Part 1, if you missed it and are interested, you hand check it out here. Now, on to the next section of SPN S01-E01, and the grown up brothers reuniting. This is probably my favorite aspect of the episode.
Reunited and It Feels So 鈥 Awkward
(But, in a good way)
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If you鈥檙e interested in my more detailed commentary, check it out under the cut
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JARED, JENSEN, and EXPOSITION: Jared and Jensen had a tall order to fill with the Pilot, needing to both give the audience an idea of their relationship as brothers, as well as delivering a good deal of exposition without bogging down the episode's momentum. They do an amazing job with the former and a very decent job with the latter. Their acting choices and chemistry paint a very full picture of who these guys are and what they mean to each other, which I鈥檒l go into more chronologically as examples come up. The exposition of filling us in on the family situation, their dad in particular, and the fact that they are monster hunters is done quite well for the most part. However, while a good deal of it comes across quite naturally, some moments do stand out to me as a bit too rehearsed (the scene with "鈥 Dad gave me a forty-five." "What was he supposed to do?") and can feel a little too expositiony to me now, but that's probably partly because I鈥檝e seen them so much now. However, the scenes are necessary, and as far as the telling vs showing ratio goes, the Pilot does a lot more showing, so overall even this aspect is handled quite well regardless of some moments scratching for me now.
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JESSICA: So 鈥 where to start on this introduction to the adult Sam and Dean. Actually, let鈥檚 start with Jess. She seems great: responsible, punctual, loving, supportive, encouraging, funny, and beautiful. And Sam looks at her like he can鈥檛 believe how lucky he is to be with her. Generally, I like her, though we don鈥檛 get to see a lot of her. However, I wonder if she would be as supportive if she knew who Sam really was and what he did. The fact that Sam never told her about his past could just be because he wants to put it aside and pretend that part of him doesn鈥檛 exist, but given how quickly he givens in when Dean asks for help, he must have known he couldn鈥檛 avoid it forever. Denial is not just a river in Egypt鈥r whatever. Maybe, he鈥檚 just trying to protect her, but something could come for him whether she knows about the danger or not (and it does, sadly鈥.damn you, Brady!). On the other hand, maybe he didn鈥檛 tell her because he didn鈥檛 believe she would have been okay with it. And as Dean sarcastically points out, "That鈥檚 healthy." The irony of Dean commenting on healthy relationships, and withholding important information, is just too much knowing what鈥檚 coming for the guys. Anyway, regardless of Sam's motivations, Jess does seem great, but she鈥檚 so great that it was pretty obvious to me that she, the relationship, or both, were doomed. Sam may as well have jinxed them when he asked what he would do without her, and her "Crash and burn" response 鈥 well, sadly, the boy does burn. How much she could have helped him avoid his Season 5 fate is not possible to know, but it certainly didn鈥檛 help him. I鈥檝e commented on my previous Post, The Pilot (Part 1), on how this episode sets up so many things that run well into later seasons and Jess is no exception. Sam still thinks of her, misses her, loves her years later. I can鈥檛 remember right now just how late his last mention of her is鈥s it all the way into Seasons 14 or 15? Regardless, I love, and it makes me sad, to see her in the Pilot and know that she and her tragedy will pretty much impact Sam for the rest of the show, if not his whole life. Talk about building strong foundations in this episode.
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SAM: So, Sam is the first of our main characters to show up on screen, signaling that Supernatural is going to be about Sam's journey, and while it鈥檚 also clearly Dean's as well, Sam is the character who goes through the biggest transformation. It starts with Sam and ends with Sam in the audience's "current time," while it starts with the brothers and ends with the brothers if we include the past and the future/heaven (or what amounts to the prologue and epilogue). Anyway, Sam popping into the scene through that doorframe is pretty cute. It鈥檚 a very definite shift in tone. Sam playfully whining about going to a Halloween party is a huge contrast to where we left off before the title card. This scene with Sam looking adorable and so happy is downright wholesome after the scene we just left with the three Winchester males huddled together in misery over the loss of wife and mother, while their home burns. The Sam we see today appears to be very well adjusted (though he doesn鈥檛 like Halloween 鈥 interesting 鈥) despite the tragedy his younger self lived through: he is tall, handsome, in university, in an a seemingly fairly serious relationship as he appears to live with his girlfriend, and as we find out at the party, he鈥檚 smart and ambitious. Sam, in short, is thriving. The first hint that things aren鈥檛 great for him is when we find out that his family, John and Dean, don鈥檛 even know how well he is doing in school, and with the way Jessica comforts him, this is clearly something that upsets him despite the casual attitude he tries to project about it.
At this point in the episode, my first impression of Sam was that he was cute (I didn鈥檛 really find him sexy until later in the series because in Season 1 he feels like a boy), loyal, smart, and maybe a little bit of a stick in the mud. Jared, at this point, is starting to give off his puppy energy, especially with his devoted heart eyes for Jess, but I feel like it takes him a minute to give Sam more nuance; but once he gets there, he kills it. When we meet Dean, more aspects of Sam, a fuller picture, starts to become more clear. He is the one who chose to leave his family. He grew up fighting monsters, but clearly just wanted a normal life. He was clearly out of sync with his dad and brother. With these bits of new information, when I first watched the show (this has changed since then) it originally made me feel like maybe Sam was a little bit selfish or maybe he didn鈥檛 care that much about his family. For me, him being so dismissive of John being missing (or "going overtime on a Miller Time shift") pointed either to Sam being a bit of an uncaring dick, or to their dad being a bit of a careless drunk. Neither, as it turns out is exactly the case, but the Pilot definitely drops info bombs on us, and some of the debris is left for us to sort through for now. We see Sam go from flippant to to concerned real quick when Dean rephrases his message to, "Dad's on a hunting trip. And he hasn鈥檛 been home in a few days."
Visually, this scene is set up very well. Particularly from just before Jess turns on the light to Sam鈥檚 reaction to Dean鈥檚 words above, we see Sam struggle to fit into the world he chose. First, we have Sam and Dean appear as a joint silhouette, all in shadow (the dark hunting world, their traumatic past). When Jess flips on the light, we see her wearing a Smurfs pj top (in the lighter, more care-free normal world). There is a clear contrast between the brothers on one side in the dark and Jess on the other in her cartoon jammies. Sam hastens to leave Dean's side and ally himself with Jess when Dean says he has to tell him something. Sam literally joins the other side as he crosses the room and gives off the vibes or building a brick wall between them and Dean. Two college kids in their jammies vs a rough adult in street clothes. But as soon as Dean clarifies that dad is on a hunting trip, the camera tightens in on Sam, effectively cutting Jess out of the picture altogether. Sam compounds this by asking her to excuse him and Dean. The scene ends on a visually isolated Sam, who has just verbally allied himself with Dean. Anyway, I just really like how this scene uses the blocking, lighting and language illustrate Sam's conflict. As much as he鈥檚 tried, it already seems clear that Sam can鈥檛 escape his old life, and he鈥檚 even complicit in it because he won鈥檛 fully abandon Dean.
DEAN: Minutes ago in the episode, we got Sam's entrance with him popping around the door frame, happy, domestic, practically wholesome (and cute as heck). In contrast, Dean enters the scene as a mysterious figure who we can鈥檛 see clearly, at first. This is apt given how Dean puts up walls and uses humor to deflect when we first meet him, and for a long time to come, actually. So, it鈥檚 hard to know exactly who he is. Just like in the fight we see glimpses of his and Sam鈥檚 faces, we can鈥檛 see either of them fully or consistently, and they can鈥檛 see each other, until the lights are switched on. I like the symbolism or metaphor of the way the fight is shot; we don't have a full idea of who either brother is yet, and they don鈥檛 fully know each other anymore either, after years apart.
Anyway, Dean enters the scene cloaked in shadows and literally brings chaos and violence into Sam's previously cozy, domestic, and structured life. It鈥檚 a pretty iconic introduction to a character and the brother dynamic, and a reunion all rolled into one. Dean comes in hot, and I don鈥檛 mean physically (though, yeah), he鈥檚 practically buzzing with manic energy. He wrestles with his brother, asks for a beer and hits on his brother鈥檚 girlfriend all in the matter of a couple of minutes, before dropping his info bomb on Sam.
My first impression of Dean was that he was hot, lacked boundaries, really cared about his dad, and was a bit of a dick. I really don鈥檛 like him telling Jess that she鈥檚 out of Sam's league while he gives her the eye because, come on, Sam is adorable, and it shows a lack of respect for both of them. I get it鈥檚 a short hand for showing Dean is a "ladies man" but it just makes him seem a bit gross, to me. Really, I think this is supposed to just be a healthy dose of screwing with his brother, but it鈥檚 not for me.
Also, Dean showing up at night is totally weird, and he never gives a real answer for this (besides beer). We find out in the final episode of the show that he waited outside for hours because he was scared Sam would tell him to "get lost or get dead," and it truly gives me all the feels when I watch this part of the episode now, and it makes absolute sense given some hints we see of Dean's feelings later in the episode. I just wonder if that was always the intended reason for Dean showing up in the middle of the night, him being afraid and breaking in so he could tell himself Sam blew him off because of the way he showed up, if that happened. Or was it more for the horror, bump in the night, aesthetic and to simply add to Dean's cool persona. Also, I find Dean's energy almost manic in this scene, but this also makes sense if he鈥檚 worried and just trying to brazen out the situation, pour on the careless bravado to avoid this worry and nerves.
At this point in the episode, I think Dean is fun, but kind of a jerk. Jensen is definitely a scene stealer, though, and he鈥檚 lively and compelling to watch. Dean is exciting. When I start to genuinely like him more though is when he lowers the walls a little and admits to Sam that he doesn鈥檛 want to look for their dad alone. It鈥檚 clear that he just wants Sam with him. We can see his vulnerability as he avoids making eye contact as he admits this truth to Sam. And Dean being honest works on Sam immediately, when suggesting it was his duty to help or that his dad was really in trouble this time didn鈥檛. This moment is pretty quick, but it starts to show us that the brothers do have definite soft spots for each other despite the issues they clearly have.
(The Pilot Part 3 coming soonish 鈥 this one took me a while 鈥)
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