*smashes in like the Kool-Aid man*
PENDRAGON SIBLINGS YOU SAY????
I have. So many Feels. About Themst™
The complexity?? The layers?? The angst?? Hello??????
Their relationship is just So Much, because you are right, it's all tangled up in miscommunication and missed opportunities, and so many problems that can be sourced back to Uther "War Crimes" Pendragon, who wouldn't know a healthy relationship if it bit him on the ass.
If Merlin and Arthur are two sides of the same coin, then Arthur and Morgana are edges of the same blade.
Because it's the lonely childhoods, the shared grief, the friendship, the vulnerability, the fondness, the teasing, the envy, the jealousy, the almost romance, the protectiveness, the betrayal, the loss, the hurt, the refusal to let go and the desperate hanging on, and the love, the love, the love.
Indifference is the true opposite of love.
Hate is love that's gone rotten.
“If Merlin and Arthur are two sides of the same coin, then Arthur and Morgana are edges of the same blade.” oh fuck….
OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH FUCK
WAIT HOLD ON WAIT LEMME PIGGYBACK ON THAT BESTIE @0hheytherebigbadwolf (tagging you bc it will be a couple days after you sent this ask)
(Also, for anyone wanting background context on what me and bestie are bouncing off on: voilà)
OK OK SO
we are all familiar with King Uther being the greatest (worst) dad of all time, correct? places such high expectations on his “only son and heir” whilst never officially acknowledging Morgana as his daughter until the very end?
F+ father of the year :)
he is not above sending his children into the dungeon if they disobey him as seen here:
(Jfc he even put Morgana in chains like wtf)
also, he is not above using emotional guilt towards them when he deems it necessary (aka one of the only times he actually acknowledges them as his children)
UTHER (1x02 Valiant)
I trust you will make me proud.
UTHER (1x08 The Beginning of the End)
I’ve treated you like a daughter. Is this how you repay me?
UTHER (1x12 To Kill the King)
You are the daughter I never had.
UTHER (2x08 Sins of the Father)
You would believe a sorcerer’s lies over the word of your father?
not to mention that when Arthur or Morgana try to reason with him or argue with him since they are the only ones with the status to do so, he pulls rank
UTHER (1x12 To Kill the King)
May I remind you that you are speaking to your King [...] Take care, child, or I’ll have you restrained.
UTHER (2x08 Sins of the Father)
I am your king and your father. You will show me some respect!
UTHER (2x06 Beauty and the Beast)
We live in dangerous times, I cannot allow you to undermine my authority.
UTHER (3x10 Queen of Hearts)
You have caused this to happen, Arthur. My decision is final.
ngl i could include more but i have already spent hours searching for shit (YOUTUBE WILL DIE BY MY HAND THAT STINGY BITC—) but y’all get what i mean: Uther is an abusive fucker and it has messed up the conditions of Arthur and Morgana
now, about the double edged blade…..
as previously established, Uther is a fucking dick and wants his children to obey him but also adore him. with this behavior, the Pendragon siblings react in two ways: with anger & contempt or submission and remorse
way #1
i’m gonna start with Morgana because anger is the easiest to pick out throughout the show. in the first episode of the first season, our introduction to Morgana’s character is her lecturing Uther about executing the man Merlin witnessed upon entering Camelot (such a warm welcome for Emrys, mh?)
MORGANA
I just don't think chopping someone's head off is cause for a celebration. That poor mother.
UTHER
It was simple justice for what he'd done.
MORGANA
To whom? He practiced some magic, he didn't hurt anyone.
UTHER
You were not around twenty years ago, you have no idea what it was like.
MORGANA
How long are you going to keep punishing people for what happened then?
early on, it is easy to pick up on Morgana’s resentment and anger at Uther, who she believes is blinded by his fear of magic and his need for control (which she isn’t wrong about). also, we find that she isn’t one to back off when poking the bear (Uther). she does it constantly in seasons 1 & 2
MORGANA (1x03 Mark of Nimueh)
Why would she kneel on a cold stone floor morning after morning when she could make these things happen with a snap of her fingers? Like an idle king!
MORGANA (1x08 The Beginning of the End)
How can this child be your enemy? He's just a boy.
UTHER
He is a Druid.
MORGANA
Is that such a crime?…What have these people done to you? Why are you so full of hate?
UTHER (2x04 Lancelot and Guinevere)
How many men would you have me sacrifice to save a servant?
MORGANA
As many as it takes!
to be honest, i wouldn’t be surprised if screaming, arguing and berating Uther about his morals and ethics is her way of proving that she is not weak or submissive to his actions. i mean, Morgana grew up in a household the complete opposite from her time in Camelot. Gorlois, the man whom Morgana considers to be her father and one and only family member, was said to be “just” and “kind” and someone that Uther even considered a good friend who openly kept him in check. Morgana, until the age of ten, understood parental love and empathy unlike Arthur, who spent his whole life without any good or healthy substance of it.
the culture of Camelot and Uther’s wrath is not something Morgana was ever able to fully acclimate to as Uther himself pointed out in 1x12. She “was at odds with [him] since the beginning” and could never picture herself as a Pendragon (point further proven in 4x05: she looked revolted when Queen Annis compared her to Uther) because she didn’t share in their idea of magic = evil and a king = absolute control.
ironic in terms of future plot events, isn’t it :’)
way #2
compare that to Arthur: man’s respressed af. keeps all his emotions under lock and key if they are anything but haughty and serious. y’all, Arthur even says it himself how he “[can't] disagree with Father [Uther] in public.” whenever Arthur finds himself at odds with Uther, he holds his tongue and waits until he can disobey secretly (2x05 when he leaves to rescue Gwen, 1x08 when he helps Morgana sneak out Mordred in the dark of the night, 2x08 when he sneaks out to meet Morgause for more info about his mom, etc). it is only the rare moments when Arthur feels impassioned enough to speak up without fearing any retribution does Arthur talk back at him (so satisfying 👌)
ARTHUR (1x03 Mark of Nimueh)
[Morgana’s] right, Father. You hear the word magic, you no longer listen.
ARTHUR (2x08 Sins of the Father)
This is what fuels your hatred for those who practice magic. Rather than blame yourself for what you did, you blame them….You hunted her kind like animals! How many hundreds have you condemned to death to ease your guilt?!….You speak of honour and nobility! You're nothing but a hypocrite and a liar!
ARTHUR (3x10 Queen of Hearts)
You can't forbid my feelings any more than I can. I won't deny them any longer, I love her. I love Guinevere.
we can even compare how the two react to Uther’s violence towards them
(ahahahahahaaaaa what a wonderful dad)
on the left, you see Arthur’s face right when Uther crushes the morteus flower needed to heal Merlin (his manservant/friend/????) and on the right, is Morgana after Uther discovers she was harboring a Druid child in her chambers and she refuses to listen to his reason.
notice how both faces are remarkably similar 👀
however, Arthur’s look of shock and dismay come from his hope that Uther would do the right thing. that he would help save Merlin’s life from dying of poison. that he wouldn’t use this as a method to teach Arthur “what it means to disobey and cross the king.” he truly did hope, just like he always does with the people he holds close. Arthur cannot help but hope and trust that those close to him will not betray him and yet so many do. hence the remorse
looking at Morgana, her shock comes from the fact that this might be the first time Uther reacted to her words and actions in a physical manner. my suspicion is that most of the time, all Morgana previously got was Uther reprimanding her and yelling at her to stop questioning his methods (bc, let’s be real, she was the favorite child.) never has he lifted a finder on her like Arthur and i have proof (cue transcript!)
AND! and, Arthur is constantly warning Morgana about not angering Uther any further because of the consequences she might face (consequences this boy is very familiar with) when Uther deems it necessary to “teach” his children obedience.
UTHER (1x04 The Poisoned Chalice)
You have to learn there's a right and a wrong way of doing things. I'll see you're let out in a week. Then you can find yourself another servant.
UTHER (3x10 Queen of Hearts)
You have caused this to happen, Arthur. My decision is final [...] This is for your own good.
-
UTHER
She will die. The enchantment will be broken. You'll see I was right.
UTHER (2x08 Sins of the Father)
I am protecting you from your own foolishness!
so educational 🥰 but see, because Uther presents his punishments as lessons, Arthur himself views them as just a fucked up but meaningful way of his father’s concern because “yeah, I am the first born son and only heir to the throne. of course I need to learn not to do silly things like disobey, talk back to him, be my own person.” <- I’m paraphrasing here
Arthur does and has never seen a way out of the life thrust upon him by Uther (see 3x06). succeeding Uther as king, marrying a noblewoman of high standing for heirs and alliance strength was always expected of him. Arthur never saw a way out of this. even when he and Gwen were in their secret relationship phase, Arthur had to remind himself that this would never last. he loved her and knew she loved him, but there was always that reminder (that sounded a lot like Uther) in the back of his head telling him that it would never last so long as he was prince. he had a duty (constructed by Uther) to serve Camelot and going against his father would mean (in his eyes) that he is going against Camelot (as Uther always presented it to be).
so unlike Morgana, he did not kick and scream but stood firm because that was what he believed was stronger. if he stayed in his lane and did his part, then he would be a good king, maybe even a better one than his father, for Camelot. however, the show proves that differentiating himself from Uther actually made him the better king and more respected, but this is not the meta for that. I am getting side tracked.
OK: so we’ve established parental issues between the two siblings. now onto their very complex, complicated yet beloved dynamic
sO, as i mentioned in this post (because i am lazy and too tired to copy/paste the evidence from there), these siblings do care for one another. they just go about it in the most hilarious and repressed and in-denial way (hilarious to me 😤)
when we meet them, it’s established that these two have known each other for some time. enough for them to bicker and have banter, you know, as you do with a Pendragon. also, should add, neither character are ever aware they are blood-related until s3 (because of some weak-ass bitch named Uther), so you have that very, uh, interesting subplot in s1 that everybody forgets about until you rewatch it. (honestly, I have so many questions. number 1: why???? number 2: it’s only in s1—was it scrapped??? is it like it never existed???? what was its purpose to the plot??? bbc explain yourself—)
however, despite how much it is shown that they do care for one another, they’re relationship in s1 is still undefined and vague as if they also don’t know how to accurately define what the other means to them. it’s very similar to the whole “i really love this person so much but is what i’m feeling platonic, familial, or romantic?” because….you know, guy and girl besties who are close are typically expected to grow romantic feelings for each other, so tbh i would not be surprised if both mistook their love as romantically inclined in the beginning bc, reminder, neither of them were aware they were siblings until much later.
[and this is ALL i am saying on this subplot. i do not want to cause any negative discourse, so if anyone has a few choice words about it, either keep it to yourself or feel free to talk about it with people you know. personally? not a fan of the ship and never will be, but i am not here to post about that.]
anyway, have some featured receipts showing Arthur and Morgana slipping up and showing how much they care for each other.
SEE!!!! LOOK AT HOW THE CARE!!!! SEE HOW THEY WORRY FOR THE OTHER AND WISH TO PROTECT THEM FROM HARM!!! (and see how even when they’re on opposite sides there is still that same love. just more warped and corrupted T^T)
^worried/protective Morgana
^Arthur’s face after Merlin informs him that there’s an intruder heading to Morgana’s chambers
Morgana is very aware of Arthur’s trusting nature. Arthur is very aware of Morgana’s empathy and righteous nature. they understand each other so well which is why Morgana knew just how to harm Arthur in later seasons and why Morgana’s betrayal hit Arthur so hard. it’s also why he never stopped trying to reach out to her in s4 & s5. as @merlinemrys said in this lovely post, the show’s driving force is love. love of all kinds. whatever conflict it is, love is there at the center of it all and, in Arthur and Morgana’s case, it does not save them (just like how love does not save Merlin or Arthur from what lies ahead, as the op of the post pointed out).
that is what makes their relationship/love be like a double edged sword!! that is why they are edges of the same blade!!! they protect and fight for what they believe in and for the people they love, but the same blades cut deep and twist their wounds into a lasting scar.
it is because of Arthur’s love for Morgana that he cannot help but hope and mourn the woman he once knew. it is because of Morgana’s love for Arthur that her feelings of hatred are so strong and ugly.
like honestly,
look at them T^T compared to before
their relationship is so tragic T^T because we knew them before it all went wrong. we knew they cared and understood each other. we knew that for some time, they only had each other to rely on for a friend, a crutch, a breather for when the royal life was too much. both of them were fighters and strive to honor their values. both of them had once leaned on the other for support, had wanted nothing but happiness for each other.
fuck, they didn’t even get the chance to really be siblings because they found out too late, and by then Morgana was on a war path and Arthur only found out at the last minute.
like fuck, man
two sides of the same blade: forged with love, yet used for blood
screencaps brought to you by me, @sourdough-morbread, and farfarawaysite
60 notes
·
View notes
Hey hey! Love your doctor au!
My request: two patient coming in but they are highly aggressive and hallucinating very badly and suddenly They start attacking Thena. Lucky for her Gil sees this and protects her!
"Hey!"
Heads turn as one of the ER beds starts rattling. It's the last in the line, and Thena's voice travels out to the rest of the room as she tries to restrain her patient.
"No! No, they're everywhere!" It's a young male, late high school or perhaps early college age. He's tall, well built. He and the patient next to him were picked up in a convenience store parking lot on some form of substance.
Thena tries to hold his arm still. She wasn't even as far as getting blood pressure when he started thrashing. "Take it easy!"
"No! I have to get out of here!" The kid starts flailing even more, maybe not even aware of Thena yet.
"Oh my god," Ajak gasps as she sees it, waving to the security guards stationed closer to the main door, "help her!"
The two rush over, but the kid is full of adrenaline, and the other one needs restraining too, up and screaming about locusts in the air vents.
"Thena!" Ajak runs over to her but skids to a halt. The patient is hallucinating, high on adrenaline and whatever else, in no state to be approached, that's for sure.
"Don't," Thena grunts as she tries to get the kid's hands off her face as he begs her to shut off the air in the room. He grips the collar of her scrubs, "provoke...him..."
Ajak looks around the room, but it's been a quiet night. All their interns are on other cases or on break. Even then, she doesn't know if any of them would be able to overpower this particular patient alone. "Where's Gil?"
The other nurses are already scrambling for the check in log, seeing if he's in the building or on a run.
"I'll even take Kingo."
"Gil's checked in as of 7 minutes ago."
"Get him here!"
The page goes out for active paramedics to triage. Ajak goes to the patient that security did manage to wrangle and gets a sedative into him. She looks at Thena every few seconds, anxiously keeping an eye on her situation of trying to talk down the more nervous one.
"You'll choke if you don't close your lungs!"
"Thena!"
Thena claws at him as his hands close around her long, slim neck. It's easy for his palms to press into her windpipe. She claws at his hands, his face--anything she can reach.
"Get off her!"
Gil charges over, barrelling towards them. The kid still doesn't blink, but Gil wastes no time, with no concern for being too rough with a patient. He grabs the back of the kid's neck, making him reflexively reach to stop whatever is causing his pain. Thena drops to the floor and gasps for air.
Gil throws the kid with one hand--tosses him like a doll into the wall behind them.
Thena draws air into her lungs desperately, coughing and sputtering as she holds her sore throat. She feels Gil lean down to her, his hand on her back, enclosing a safe space for her as she regains her bearings.
"Thena, hey, look at me," he whispers. It's gentle, as is everything with Gil, but she can hear the urgency in it. He's scared. "Please, Thena."
She pulls her head up to look at him, although the blurriness in her vision is a red flag. She blinks at him, feeling his hands on her cheeks. He pulls her closer to him, letting her lean against him. Adrenaline drains out and the heaviness of fatigue replaces it.
Gil holds her head under his chin, his hand on her arm and the other arm around her back.
"Everyone okay?" one of the security guards leans down to ask them.
Gil's glare sends him a step or two backwards. "Where the hell were you?"
Before security becomes the next target of Gil's undeniable strength - and surprisingly frightening temper - Ajak comes over. She puts a hand on Gil's shoulder, meeting his eyes to ask permission from him.
Reluctantly, he loosens his hold on Thena. It's enough for Ajak to pick up her fallen stethoscope and use it for herself, listening to her heart, listening to her breathing. She touches Thena's neck ever so gently.
"I'm fine," Thena protests, but it's a little wheezy sounding, and Ajak can see the redness where bruises will form in all shapes and colours.
"Fine my ass," Ajak glares at her, and finds that even Thena knows better to argue with the mother hen of the ER. She pats Gil's shoulder, "take her to the bus to get some cold compacts on that neck. I'll handle things in here."
"But-"
"Thena," Ajak snaps her fingers and points at her, silencing the doctor completely. Ajak nods them away, taking Thena's stethoscope with her. She'll get it back after Ajak is satisfied that she's been cared for.
Thena sighs, feeling Gil close in around her. She presses a hand to his chest, "I can walk, Gil."
He looks at her desperately, and her heart pulls.
"Really," she whispers, at least allowing him to help her to her feet. Her knees have a little bit of a wobble to them, but she's the Goddess of War, and she doesn't hobble away from anything.
Gil keeps an arm wrapped around her on the way to the ambulance, passing Kingo complaining to Ajak about what 'I'll even take Kingo' meant. "Hey."
Kingo notices Gil walking by, notices the ghostly silence of Thena hovering beside him, and notices them on their way to their ambulance. He nods.
Thena sighs again, testing the tenderness of her neck for herself, "I can't take the rest of the night off, you know. We sent all those damned kids home because it was so slow."
Gil shakes his head, guiding her gently by the shoulder to the back of the vehicle and holding her hand as she steps up into it. "If only they'd been able to tell us what they were on. We could have known they weren't marijuana high but something more dangerous."
Thena shrugs her shoulders as she takes a seat on one of the benches, "these things happen."
"Yeah, but it happened to you," Gil argues with a deep set frown, pulling the doors closed behind him as he sits next to her, "that's the problem."
Thena moves silently, letting him turn her back to him in the small space. He pulls at the collar of her scrubs gently, afraid to so much as brush his fingers against her already damaged skin. "It could have been worse."
"Sh," he whispers, collecting her hair out of his way oh-so gently, "let me work, Doctor Thena."
She puffs through her nose in a soft laugh, turning her head to let him continue his examination. She can feel just the tips of his fingers travelling around the bend of her neck and the curve of her shoulders. She lets him turn her again, keeping her head angled as he examines the front damage.
Gil tugs her shirt as needed, although there's no hint of blunt trauma anywhere even as far down as her clavicle. He runs his fingers along the prominence of the bone, casting shadows along her ghostly pale skin.
Thena's breath hitches.
"Sorry," he whispers, not asking if it's his cold hands or if it hurts or if it's just a sensitive spot for her. He moves back to her neck, with clear marks already of where those hands had closed around it. He hovers his fingers near it but doesn't dare make contact. "Hurt?"
Thena stays quiet, and she's obviously thinking about lying to him about it. But he brushes his thumb along her jaw and she deflates, "a little sore."
Gil nods. He can imagine it's sore; it's going to bruise something awful, that's for sure. He reaches into a drawer and pulls out an ice-gel pack. "You should get something on that to help the blood flow."
Thena smiles, letting him press the cold against her neck for her. She sighs faintly at the relief of it, her hands coming to rest on his wrist as he holds it for her.
"Really scared me, y'know."
She opens her eyes, and he has that same heart wrenching look on his face. He looks like a puppy left out in the rain. She imagines she goes tender in the eyes as well, leaning her cheek against his hand on her neck.
Gil reaches up with his other hand, brushing her hair away from her face. "I've never been so terrified as when I saw him holding you like that."
Thena's eyes drift down between them. She can't imagine what it would have been like for him to arrive on a scene like that. She remembers the fear that had gripped her during the car crash incident that had Gil fainting in her ER. She...could have handled that better, in retrospect.
Thena's eyes flutter as Gil pulls her forward, pressing his lips to her temple (the way she had done for him that time, and then run away and refused to talk about it).
"You know I'm not leaving your side for the rest of the night."
Thena smiles, half-encircled in his warm, strong arms in her half-turned position. Their knees knock together, but she turns her smile into the inside of his wrist to hide at least some of it. "You have a job to do, Gil. We both do?"
"Kingo will cover for me," Gil says a little more easily, and Thena lets out a faint laugh this time. It's still a little thinner and gaspier than he would like, but it's still her laugh. "You said it was a slow night. And you have - what - seven more hours? I'm not letting you do that alone."
"Ajak is in there alone now, I have to get back to her!"
"Okay, okay," Gil pulls away with a lopsided smile. He lifts the compress, checking if it did anything. The redness of her skin has improved at least a little. "Okay, fine, I admit it's pretty surface. No need for a full on neck brace or anything."
Thena claims and savours her victory.
"But you still shouldn't strain your voice tonight," he continues as they both stand to go back inside. "Let Ajak or me do most of the talking. And I'm filing a complaint about those security numbskulls."
"Don't file a complaint," she scolds him as he helps her down from the step at the back of the bus. "HR will drag it on and on and on."
Gil frowns, his hands settling on her hips as he keeps her with him for a second longer, "I find their failure to do their jobs pretty serious, Thena."
She shakes her head at him, resting her hands on his hips to match his posture. "It's their job to protect both patients and staff, not me specifically, Gil."
He pouts at her.
"Don't look at me like that," she smiles, slipping her hands away but tugging at one of his belt loops to pull him with her again. "I'm already letting you follow me around for the rest of shift. I can only make so many exceptions for you."
"You?--making exceptions for me?" Gil scoffs as he walks in beside her, "you're lucky I haven't thrown you over my shoulder and walked out with you."
"You wouldn't dare."
"Don't tempt me," he whispers, shrugging off his work hoodie and laying it over her shoulders. She looks at it but he puts his hand over it, not willing to accept it back for the rest of the night, "Doctor."
11 notes
·
View notes