Tumgik
#bucky comfort
buckyalpine · 5 months
Text
Little baby Bucky loved when his mama used to sing to him. It was the only thing that would soothe her fussy baby boy, no more than a few months old. She'd wrap him up in a warm blanket and hum softly, his tiny hands clutching onto her blouse. His forehead would rest against her neck, the vibrations and her calming voice gently lulling him to sleep.
He'd coo whenever she sang to him, blue eyes bright and wide, eventually growing heavy as she rocked him. It's the only thing that soothed him, sending him off into sweet dreams and peaceful sleep.
****
Bucky squeezes his eyes shut, tossing and turning, willing for sleep to come but it never does. He's exhausted and he'd give anything to be able to turn his brain off but nothing works. You feel his restless shifting beside you, reaching out to see if he's having a nightmare.
"You okay ?" You ask, rubbing sleep from your eyes, finding him looking nervous when you roll over to face him "What is it Jamie" You carded your fingers softly through his hair and he nuzzles into your palm further, scared you'd find it weird because he knows what he needs.
He knows it'll work instantly.
"Can-can you sing to me?" He whispers without meeting your eyes, getting ready for you to pull away and avoid his request; he shuts his eyes, embarrassed from what he asked.
"Of course" You coo, humming an old song you know he loves, his eyes closing while you softly sing the words. He tries to fall asleep to your voice alone, already feeling more relaxed, but he knows he needs more.
Just a little bit more.
You don't say anything as he slowly shuffles closer and closer till he's practically laying on top of you, cuddling himself into the crook of your neck. His heavy beefy body covers you completely; a large mass of thick muscle and metal.
Yet he feels so little.
He curls himself up, nestled against your body under the covers, his eyes growing heavier each second. He settles himself with his face nuzzled against your skin, letting out a yawn as sleep finally starts to consume him. Your voice grows softer when you hear his quiet snores, pressing a kiss to his forehead and pulling the sheets up to keep him wrapped up and warm.
He smiles in his sleep, finally feeling safe, your adorable beefy baby boy.
2K notes · View notes
Note
heya hiya bbg!! since you are writing for bucky i might as well do 10 y/o me some justice <3
i weirdly remember this dream i had (most of my requests are my delusional ahh dreams oml😞) where reader basically calms him after a nightmare like asking him what happened, if he wants to talk abt it, humming/singing to him, trying to cheer him up, etc etc
v cute v fluffy <3
hopefully u can get to this soon! have a great week/end!
-🪐
angel my bbg hi!! love it love it love it!! thank you for requesting, hope you like it 💌
UNRESTED.
bucky barnes x fem!reader
Tumblr media
word count. 647
warnings. reverse comfort bc I can’t stop myself from writing it, nightmares but no description. it’s just fluff and comfort
Tumblr media
It was no secret that Bucky didn't sleep well, often tormented by memories, leaving him with minimal hours of uninterrupted rest. Most nights were the same, him restlessly tossing in bed, murmuring and jolting as though he's stuck in the past - reliving it all over again.
Tonight was no different. You were nudged awake by your boyfriend sleeping to the right of you, his twitching movements hustling the mattress and snatching the covers. You check the time on your phone and sit up slowly, adjusting beside Bucky. 
You extend a hand, hesitantly reaching for him. You place your palm over his shoulder, the sheen of his cold sweat permeating your skin. "James," you whisper, trying not to startle him. "James," you try again. 
He abruptly sits, lids flinging open, a deep, heavy inhale filling his lungs. "God," he murmurs, brushing a hand down his face. His breathing is ragged and strained, shoulders tensing under your touch.
You brush your hand down his back, stroking over him smoothly. "You're awake. It's okay," you coo, drawing circles over his scarred skin - trying to refocus his mind.
He sighs, dropping his head in his hands, his breathing beginning to even out. "Was the same one again," he mumbles, his voice soft and saddened against his palms.
Your touch remains warm, trailing over him lovingly. "It sounded like it," you whisper, your tone gentle. "I'm sorry, love."
You slip your free hand into his metal one, carefully pulling it away from his face - your thumb brushing over the vibranium. You bring him to your lips and press a kiss on the back of it. You continue to hold him like that, one hand grazing up and down the curve of his back, your other holding the metal on your lap - trying to bring him back as such. 
Bucky turns to look at you, his face knowing. The sight of your sweet features gently lit up in the moonlight, slowly putting his mind at ease.
You meet his downcast gaze, your eyes pooling with empathy. You give him a weak smile before resting the side of your head on his left shoulder, cheek skimming the scars. 
"Do you want to talk about it?" you ask.
He copies your movement, resting his head over yours - the side of his face propped on your crown. "Not yet," he mutters in response, exhaling a steady breath. 
"That's okay," you whisper back, turning to place a kiss on his upper metal arm. "We don't have to right now."
There's a moment of comfortable silence - the only sounds of breathing and the heavy pitter-patter of rain against the window. You continue to hold Bucky, waiting for him to pull away. But he never does.
"Sorry for waking you again,"
"James," you comfort, sweetly cooing at him. "You never have to be sorry for that... I was already awake anyway," you lie - trying to make him feel better. 
You keep a grip on him as you lean back against the mattress, pulling him with you, which he adjusts immediately, cuddling into your side - his arm draping over your middle. You slip your arm under his head and wrap around it, almost like you were cocooning him. Protecting him. Just you cradling his head safely in your arms.
"Thank you," Bucky mutters, his words muffling against your skin as he presses a kiss to your shoulder.
Your fingers graze up into the short hairs at the back of his head - nails soothingly scratching his scalp. "Of course," you murmur back, whispering into his forehead.
Both of you stay like that, listening to the night storm, cuddled and huddled under the covers - his hand slowly making its way up to your heart. He rests his palm over the organ, using the faint thumping to ease him back to sleep.
Tumblr media
535 notes · View notes
subwaysurf45 · 1 year
Text
Team Bucky
Tumblr media
Summary: your secret relationship with Bucky slips out. Everyone else in the compound is happy for you both but your brother - or really your grandfather - is not pleased at all, all you can do is try and live normally with Bucky and attempt to fix things with Steve. 
Words: 6k
warnings: SMUT: passionate sex, unprotected, very loving, aftercare. arguing, yelling, swearing, protective Bucky. 
a/n: heyyy, yeah I’ve been away for a while, this semester as been kicking my ass. anyways, I’m on winter break and have finally gotten my spark for writing back, I’ve been writing a lot of essays so writing for fun was not fun for a while. I hope you enjoy and I will try to post as often as I can!
Tumblr media
There had always been a secret one-upping game going on between Steve and Bucky, it was something everyone had exempted and went along with. There would be countless times when they’d add more and more weight to their bars in order to prove their dominance to each other, or spar with one another until someone gets hurt.
At galas, Steve would be walking around with a trail of women behind him, showing off his skills with the ladies. That didn’t mean anything to Bucky, he would love to get laid more often or get a girlfriend but the ability to make women think they are into you and then drop them like a dead weight isn't appealing.
There were probably things Bucky did to get on Steve’s nerves that Steve didn’t care for. They didn’t do it all the time, just friendly competition. They had been friends for years and years, someone’s weight being a little higher couldn’t even cause a crack in their friendship.
But what Bucky was doing recently would.
There you were, sitting alone in the office as you filled out a debrief of your last mission. The computers were high tech but that didn’t mean they were super fast, most of the time you sat there waiting for anything to load, and seeing the logo in the top corner was a miracle.
“How’s that arm?” Bucky asked as he walked in, acting like he hadn’t been standing outside the door practicing what he was going to say.
“Hard to type with-aw, Bucky…” you pouted and saw the two steaming mugs in his hand, “stop, that’s so sweet!” you reached forward and picked up your favourite mug, looking at Bucky with wide eyes as he pulled out the chair beside you and sat down. “This is going to take forever, Bucky, you don’t-”
“I’m good,” Bucky sighed as he brought his mug right against his bottom lip to blow, “nowhere else I’d rather be.”
“You’re all soft” you giggled and turned back to your computer, “I do need to focus though, no distractions.”
“You have my word,” Bucky smiled and leaned back in his chair, “I’m just here for moral support.”
You just nodded, he loved the face you made when you tried to fight back being flustered. Your bottom lip was clenched tightly between your teeth to fight back a smile while you tried to cover your face and block Bucky from seeing your slight change in colour. The warmth that spread all throughout your body caused you to curl into yourself, he noticed that whenever he complimented you at all you wouldn't know how to react, telling Bucky you weren’t being complimented enough.
That’s how it started, casual compliments and conversation between you two. Trying to get to know you because there was this imaginary wall up for many reasons, you didn’t like to let people into your life because of how much you had lost and something more pressing…
You were Steve’s granddaughter, factually. But you two acted like siblings because you were a little younger than Steve’s age from when he was frozen. Nonetheless, you were related.
Which also meant off-limits.
Bucky really tried to cut himself off but you were his drug, he couldn’t get enough of you. It didn’t help that you were very honest early on about being into him. When Bucky initiated conversations and would give you little touches here and there you were quick to give them back. The first time you played with his hair gave him shivers running up and down his spine but also caused his brain to go fuzzy.
You were alone in the movie room, you always watched some film every Thursday night to keep a schedule. He had come back from a mission hours ago and still managed to make his way down just to sit beside you, and he did but he realized he was too tired to do anything.
He wanted you to cuddle into him and he’d rub your back or whisper little things to just you, but his eyes couldn’t stay open.
“You’re so tired, Bucky-bear,” you whispered and threw your arm around him and to the other side of his head, gently pushing him to place his head on your shoulder, “you can go to sleep if you want,” you whispered.
His body was on his last reserve, not thinking straight at all. “Can I put my head on your chest, your shoulder is too boney,” he’d kick himself for that one in the morning. When you giggled and moved he seemed to sink into you more, wrapping both arms around you and nuzzling into your chest. Everything was so comfy he barely registered that his face was deep between your boobs, you didn’t move or say anything until… “you’re so pillowy,” he muttered.
“But my shoulder is boney?” you shook your head, “you can just say you like my boobs, most people do.”
“They’re great,” he nodded.
Your hand moved from his back and went up his scalp from his neck, earning a groan when you started to fluff around his hair and scratch somewhat intensely on his scalp. He was out before the beginning credits ended, snoring before the middle of the movie. Part of you felt this overwhelming feeling of something you couldn’t describe, Bucky Barnes, a man riddled with nightmares and trauma, constantly on high alert was asleep on your chest. The big man could dwindle down into a guy who has never once felt the touch of love from a significant other. The fact that he trusted you with the power made you proud, it made you like him just a little more.
“How much longer,” he sighed from his starfish position on the floor, being overly dramatic to try to get you to look away. You giggled and finally looked over your shoulder, scoffing at his dramatics.
“Go to bed, I’ll sneak in later.” You shook your head, “and one page left.”
Bucky sighed and sat up, staying on the ground and watching you work. It took a while but soon you were finished, reading it over before submitting it. Bucky helped you pack all your stuff away, holding your bag for you, he did that a lot, never wanting you to do any heavy lifting. Your eyes were barely open as you left the room with Bucky leading you out, you both headed down the hall and to the elevator.
“You still want to sleep with me?” Bucky asked when the door was completely closed, you were too tired to say anything, keeping your head resting against his arm and nodded slightly. “Alright, I think there is still a sweater you left in the room.”
You groaned and looked up, “your clothes please,” Bucky giggled after you whispered. The door opened and you both walked out, him wrapping an arm around you to keep you steady. “I also want to be little spoon please.”
Out of nowhere, a voice came from behind them, “watch your hands, Barnes,” it was Steve.
Bucky turned around but kept his hand where it was, “guess where I just found her?” Steve looked at your tired state, “little miss just finished her report is only going to bed now, I was walking her to her room to make sure she doesn’t pass out on her floor.”
Steve smiled a proud smile. He caught up to them and also helped you walk, subconsciously you leaned more towards Bucky at this moment, thinking of how you’d be cuddling with him soon. Bucky played along and brought you into your room, Steve was very adamant they both left before you got into your pajamas. Bucky couldn’t say no even though he had seen you naked, he had to play along.
Bucky went into his room and waited with the door unlocked, after five minutes you slipped in and found him in the bathroom. Both of you brushed your teeth beside one another, he had one arm around you while you looked at each other through the mirror.
In your opinion, his bed was much more comfortable, choosing to sleep there more often than your own bed. Both of you cuddled in close, you were practically laying on top of him with your head tucked into his neck.
“I love you, Bucky-Bear,” you mumbled, snuggling closer to him.
“I love you too, baby,” he whispered into your hair, leaving a few kisses after. “You make me so happy, I can’t explain it,” you both giggled as he tickled you.
The secret life with Bucky was great and terrible at the same time. There was a different side to Bucky that he didn’t show the team, he was much softer and more extroverted. When you’d sneak out for dates he’d always be the ordering and making conversation with the waiter because he felt safer at that moment. But at the same time, you still had to go on dates by sneaking out. Steve would kill you if he found out the two of you were seeing each other even though it had been going on for a while you both knew it wasn’t a joke. Your heart would still fall when Bucky had to drop your hand when someone else walked in a room, and both of you would grow envious of the couples openly displaying affection at galas.
The idea of telling Steve grew larger by the day because you knew it was bound to happen, part of you wanted to tell him before getting caught so it didn’t look like Bucky was just a hook-up to you. Yes, Steve would kill you but he would also tear Bucky apart because there were rules, apparently. Any type of family member was off-limits, even if Steve found a distant cousin of Bucky’s they would still be a no-go; but you knew that rule was just for you because you were all Steve had left when it came to family.
********
Steve and Bucky were sparring in the ring as you and a couple of other agents went to various machines during your workout. You couldn’t help but look over at them as they fought extremely hard against one another, there was no reason to give each other a broken nose but they did it anyway.
“Can I work in?” Sammy asked you, he had graduated from the academy the same year as you. You wouldn’t consider yourselves friends but you’d smile at each other in the hall and keep up with families.
“Of course,” you stood up from just sitting on the seat as you took your break, leaning down and picking up your water bottle. Absentmindedly you looked over to see the both of them fighting, Sammy must have noticed.
“I don’t get the game between the two of them,” he grunted, “I get it from a male perspective as in you constantly want to impress your friends but sometimes it gets bad, like what are they even doing right now?” he referenced both of them limping around the ring as they circled one another.
“Boys!” you shouted and they both looked at you, “quit putting on a show for us and just act like normal people for once in your life!” you cupped both hands around your mouth.
Bucky looked shocked, “we’re just playing around, relax!” he sassed you back, it was clear on your face you didn’t enjoy what he said, “oh come on, you always get like this, give us a break!”
“Watch it!” Steve snapped, “you better watch how you talk to my sister.” Steve looked back at you, “and you!” he pointed in your direction, “let the grown men handle their things, please.”
Bucky scoffed, “you better watch how you talk to my girlfriend.”
At that moment the world stopped. Steve whipped his head around to Bucky and just stared at him while Sammy dropped the handhelds for the machine, letting out a loud clunk. Bucky’s eye shifted towards you in what felt like slow motion as an apologetic look grew on his face, your metal water bottle slipped from your fingers and fell on your foot.
“Fuck!” the feeling of a throbbing big toe pulled you from your trance, all you heard was more commotion in front of you but you were looking down.
“You’re fucking my sister?!” Steve yelled and caused all the agents to run out of the gym, including Sammy who quickly patted your shoulder before bolting out. Bucky tried to run over to you to help with the toe injury but was stopped after Steve’s fist collided with Bucky’s throat. “You don’t get to even look at her anymore, I’ll take your fucking eyes out you pervert!”
“Steve!” you hobbled over and ran up to the ring, slipped under and grabbed Bucky’s head that was unmoving on the boxing ring floor, “you knocked him unconscious, Steve,” you gasped and pulled Bucky’s head to your thighs as you sat back on your heels, “you could have damaged his windpipe.”
“He won’t need one after he wakes up and I fully-”
“It’s not like he forced me, Steve,” You looked up at your brother, “we’ve been dating for a long time and it’s not just sex, it’s an actual romantic connection that both of our consent to, it’s actual dating!” you gently tapped Bucky’s cheek to wake him up, “don’t frame him or me to be a slut because all we do are normal dating things,” Steve’s face was red as he saw you carding through Bucky’s hair, he was starting to groan and stir.
“Both of you are dead to me,” Steve spat, “he broke the only rule I set up to protect you.”
“I don’t need to be protected from Bucky, and you know that.” you harshly whipped your head around again, “and I know you’re hurt and exaggerating, just walk away.” That was the last time you looked up at Steve, all your focus was on Bucky starting to wake up in your lap. As he groaned and slowly brought his fingers up to his nose your eyes began to water, this was exactly your worst-case scenario.
Bucky’s eyes cracked open and immediately closed again, “baby,” he mumbled, “don’t cry, please, don’t cry,” he reached up to swipe away your tears but completely missed your face, most likely seeing double. “I slipped up,” now Bucky was starting to cry, “my fault.”
You gently pulled him up in a hug and Bucky accepted it, continuously apologizing for what he had just done. Every time you’d quiet him or try to shift his train of thought but he’d make his way back there every time. After a while you got him on his feet and took him to med bay, many people came up to you and asked if everything was alright, you just nodded and kept walking.
“What happened!” Natasha was in med bay when you arrived, filling out discharge paperwork for herself, “Bucky, that looks really broken,” her fingers ghosted over his nose which caused him to wince backwards, “sorry.”
“Yeah,” you sighed and sat him on the cot, calling over a nurse who began examining, “just…going too hard with the sparring.”
Natasha shook her head, “but no one goes that hard, we all pull our punches except when it’s Steve and- oh my god…” she trailed off and looked at Bucky who was preparing to get his nose snapped back in place, “did Steve find out?”
“My fault,” Bucky cried, holding the sheet as he waited for the nurse to fix his nose.
“It’s not your fault, it was a mistake and yeah this is shitty but it will figure itself out.” you looked over your shoulder and immediately gave Bucky your hand, seeing his white knuckles gripping his sheets.
******
It had been a week and Steve refused to speak to either of you unless it was in a professional setting, even then, he’d be snarky whenever he would talk to you. He meant what he said, you really were dead to him. Part of you thought he’d just be mad at Bucky and get overprotective of you but that never happened, he viewed you like dirt; like how he looks at Bucky.
Bucky could see how it took a toll on you, it broke his heart to see you staring off into space after Steve passed by without looking at you. All Bucky could do was hold you closer, but deep down he blamed himself for letting it slip. Every tear, every longing glance, every hope he’d come around was all his fault.
He found you today curled up in bed, Bucky slipped in behind you and wrapped his arm around you, pulling you into his chest. “Everything will simmer sooner or later,” he whispered into your ear.
“I just-...” you sighed and buried your head into your pillow further, “he’s my only family, when he wanted to reconnect with me he was so adamant on making sure I came back to the tower with him, so he could have a sister,” Bucky rolled you over so you were facing him, “and now…I do something for me that makes me happy, you make me so happy, and I’m punished for it.”
Bucky planted a gentle kiss on your forehead, pulling you into another hug and letting you feel his warmth and comfort. “I will personally fix all of this, I will find a way, don’t worry, alright?” Bucky pulled back so he could see you nod, “alright?”
You nodded and Bucky kissed you again, crawling out of bed when you fell asleep. He knew where Steve was, and even though his nose had held quickly doesn’t mean he won’t get another broken nose from what he was about to do. Steve was always in the computer room, just like you. There was always something to be done when it came to paperwork and Steve had the energy for it.
Bucky stayed close to the wall and pressed his back against it, leaning over the corner to see Steve typing away at the computer near the back. Bucky pulled back and fully leaned against the wall, taking a deep breath.
Nat: We’re taking y/n out for a girl’s night, just want to let you know!
Bucky: keep me updated, and don’t let her get too drunk, please
Nat: don’t worry!
After shutting off his phone he slipped it into his pocket and took another deep breath. After mustering enough courage Bucky fully turned the corner and walked up to “Steve,” Bucky stood before him, “we need to talk.”
Steve gave nothing, he almost looked up at Bucky but it was just a flinch.
“Silent treatment?” Bucky scoffed, “that works for me to explain my side of the story without you verbally- or who knows - physically breaking me.” Steve huffed, Bucky looked at the chair but decided to stand. “I’ve been dating your sister for about a year and she’s made me the happiest man in the world,” Bucky fiddled with his fingers, “and I know we made rules and all that but this isn’t about that, we can discuss that later.” Bucky saw Steve was no longer typing but simply staring at his screen. “Steve, your sister misses you so much, she’s been curled up in bed crying about losing you, feeling punished for letting herself love someone, she’s kicking herself for something that was all my fault; I slipped up and y/n should be the last one to pay for it.” Bucky gave in and pulled up a chair, making Steve look at him, “I don’t care if we never talk again but my girlfriend is hurting and that’s what’s been killing me the most, so just talk to her, please?”
Bucky sat there, looking at his vacant face. After a sigh, Bucky rubbed his face and stood up, tucking in the chair. He ran his fingers through his hair, “y/n’s out for drinks with a couple of the girls,” Bucky said, “so she’s not here if you were thinking of talking to her.” Bucky left after that, knowing Steve wasn’t going to say anything.
When you stumbled back inside Bucky was quick to catch you, “what did I say about not letting her get stupid drunk?” Natasha just giggled and Bucky couldn’t help but smirk at all the ladies making their way to the kitchen. “How’s my baby?” Bucky whispered into your ear which caused you to get coy and curl into him, “are you a little cuddly, huh?” his finger made its way under your chin which caused you to giggle. You jumped on him to wrap your legs around his hips.
“I love you, Bucky-Bear,” you hugged him tightly, “we can run away together and never worry about anything ever again, do you want to run away with me?” you kissed Bucky’s neck as he walked into the kitchen to see them all eating chips and cookies.
“Sure we can,” he moved his head so you’d detach your lips from his neck and just cuddle into him.
Bucky stood with the group and held you like you were nothing, laughing and talking while the girls did their debrief at the kitchen island, talking about the songs and the dancing. Bucky kept you in his arms but placed you down so you were sitting on the island, letting your legs and arms wrap around him. You weren’t talking that much, Bucky looked over after five minutes of nothing to see you sleeping with your face on his shoulder.
“She did start to cry,” Natasha said sadly, “she had a lot of pent-up emotion and our uber cancelled on us twice so she was just really frustrated, but we all know she wasn’t crying about the uber.”
“Yeah,” Bucky sighed and rubbed your back, “I talked to Steve and told him to stop hurting her, you know?” Bucky looked at Nat and she nodded, “like he can be mad at me for as long as he likes, but stop doing this to your own sister, I can’t stand to see her like this, it’s awful.”
“I know,” Nat was the only one invested in the conversation, everyone else would forget this in the morning. “I feel like it’s borderline…I don’t want to say slut shaming but I can’t understand why he would be mad at her, I feel like he’d blame it all on you and only take it out on you- I know you didn’t do this but I thought he was going to pull the ‘you coerced my sister into dating you’ card… I really don’t understand his silent treatment,” Nat sighed and took a swig from her water bottle.
“I guess,” Bucky sighed and picked you up, having to hold you tightly because you were asleep and unable to squeeze your legs around his waist. “I’m going to get her ready for bed,” Bucky tried his best to smile, “I really appreciate you, Nat, she needed this.”
“She did,” Nat ran her fingers over your hair, “as much as she’s going to hate the hangover I think she really drained her emotions out and just let go for a moment,” Nat smiled at Bucky, “I’ll see you in the morning.”
Bucky left the kitchen, the moment he turned he turned the corner he saw Steve. He was trying to slip away after eavesdropping but Bucky caught him, all Bucky could do was keep walking; he’s said his piece.
“Is she ok?” Steve finally spoke as Bucky passed him with his chin up.
“From being shunned by her brother or her night out?” Bucky snapped, not even looking at Steve and heading to his room down the hall.
After making it to his room he got you ready for bed, cuddling up next to you and holding you close. He had already gotten the water and painkillers ready for tomorrow morning. All he could do now is hold you, making you as comfortable as possible.
As Bucky lay there with your head on his chest, hearing your drunk snores, he thought about Steve. Bucky reminisced all the days together, growing up and finding one another again. Part of him questioned if all of their history went away the moment he found out, was this really the breaking point for Steve? All he wanted was for you to be happy with your brother but selfishly, he wanted his friend back.
“I can, like, hear your brain,” you mumbled and hugged him tighter, “we’ll figure this out in the morning, just forget it happened and hold me normally, please.”
Bucky couldn’t help but smile, he rolled you both on your sides and kept you wrapped up. Getting into the familiar position his eyes started to feel heavy, and soon sleep took over.
********
Bucky stood in the kitchen by himself, sipping his coffee and watching the eggs and bacon cook. It has been two days since you had gotten drunk and Bucky talked to Steve, nothing had come out of Bucky’s attempt to get Steve to talk to you.
He could tell you were becoming depressed from losing your brother, the two of you were inseparable so it hurt a lot to have him cleanly break away from you. But all Bucky could do was continue to support you, and he did that by making you breakfast.
He flipped both eggs and poked at the bacon, trying not to have the grease spit back out at him, you were currently at the gym but he’d already be back in the room before you were done.
All at once, Sam ran into the kitchen, covered in sweat. “Barnes!” he yelled, “your girl is screaming at Steve in the gym-”
“Shit!” Bucky dropped everything and ran, quickly turning around and moving everything off the element while turning the stove top off. Bucky followed Sam all the way to the gym and busted through the door, immediately hearing your raging voice. “Everyone out!” he yelled at the agents standing and watching.
“Bucky, I can do this on my own!” you snapped at him, caught up in the anger towards your brother.
“I’m well aware,” Bucky put both of his hands out, “I’m just giving you two privacy, that’s all, love.” Bucky nodded when he saw you relax your shoulders, “I’m going to be right outside when you’re done, alright?”
Steve turned to Bucky, “you really love her?” he asked.
Bucky slowly tilted his head to the side, “I’ve been dating her for a year, crushing on her for two, and being fully hypnotized by her for three the moment she showed up to this place.” He looked at you, “can I keep going, or do you want this to still be you?”
“See,” you looked at Steve, “he cares about me, on a personal level that no one ever has,” you threw your arms in the air, “you need to accept this or I will have no problem sticking with Bucky.”
“You’d turn your back on your family?” Steve laughed to himself, “you’d seriously stay with him rather than your own brother-”
“You’re not even really my fucking brother, Steve!” the anger was making you jump in your spot, “when you found out I was related to you, you chose to keep me in your life, it was quick because you knew how much family meant to you,” you walked over to Bucky, taking his hand in yours, “well he’s my family now, and when shit got rough Bucky was not the one to run away, Steve…” you looked up at Bucky who couldn’t take his eyes off of Steve, “we can go now,” you whispered to him.
Bucky walked with you to your room, completely forgetting the breakfast he had made to lighten your day. The entire time you were talking about how much lighter you felt, having the ability to scream at him even though no solution was reached. As he listened to you his heart broke, you tried so hard to make it seem like it wasn’t a big deal when in reality it was, you just weren’t letting yourself fully feel it yet.
Right as the door to your shared room closed you spun and pushed Bucky up against the wall, “I love you,” you breathed before kissing him harshly, it took Bucky three seconds before pulling away and trying to ask if you were alright, “I want passionate sex right now, I want you to fuck me, baby.”
“Woah,” Bucky whispered, “you’re not…honey, you’re not in the right mindset right now, this is not-”
“Please, Bucky,” you whined and dropped down to your knees, running your hand up and down his thighs, “I really want this.”
“Are you sure?” Bucky asked, shamefully getting hard. When you nodded he picked you up and threw you on the bed, “you tell me if you want to stop, alright?”
“I never want to stop,” you whispered into his ear before sucking on his ear lobe, moving down to kiss his neck.
“Do you want me to go down on you-”
“I’m already wet, just go,” you moaned, blindly reaching down and beginning to work on his pants.
The moment Bucky entered you, you pulled him close, letting his entire body weight crush you in a soothing sort of way. At first, his face was right before yours, kissing you every so often but really just wanting to look at you.
“Pretty girl,” he groaned and tucked his face in your neck, “fuck, I love you, it’s always been you, it’ll always be you, honey- holy fuck!” his hands were moving around, feeling you and touching you all over. “You’re fucking perfect, made for me, I got you,” he sucked harshly on your neck, “I’ll always protect you, and love you, and just-I’m gonna cum, honey.”
“Me too!” you threw your head back, “I love you, Bucky,” your fingers were splayed across his back, “all I want is to run away with you, just you.” your words of love quickly shifted in moans, all you could do was let yourself get lost in the moment.
Bucky had a strong aura, it was one that made you feel protected but also reminded you that he was your rock. Passionate sex with Bucky was something else, he could get you to your peak faster than anyone just because of how much love you feel as he whispers in your ear.
The moment you both let go was a moment of pure bliss, all you could do was dig your nails further into Bucky’s back as he rode out his own high. He stilled after finishing and just stayed there, keeping his head in your neck. While he whispered praises to you, part of you filled with love, an overwhelming amount.
“I love you, Bucky,” you tried to sound put together but the moment the words left your lips Bucky looked up at you, seeing tears stream down your face, “I’m not crying because I didn’t want it, it’s just…” you could see him freaking out, “it’s not you, it’s left over emotion from that fight.”
Bucky nodded and stayed where he was until you began to shift, he wiped you down and got beside you in bed after a while. He made sure you had enough water in your cup beside you and you were warm enough under those sheets. There were a few more sniffles, you’d wipe your face in the shirt Bucky put on because he was cold.
“I just want things to work out,” you cried, “why can’t he see I’m happy and just be happy for me?” your arms hugged Bucky tightly, feeling him hug you back just as tight.
“We’ll figure it out,” his lips brushed against your ear, “everything will work out, you just need to sleep, alright?”
It didn’t take much to knock you out.
********
Bucky’s mission was taking longer than expected but he wasn’t in any danger, his communications back to the compound were perfect with his updates. You weren’t allowed to know where he was or what he was doing but you were allowed time-frame updates, all because you held the title of ‘family’ for his file.
You stood at the stove with an apron on, it had caught three splashes which you were grateful for. The pasta sauce was bubbling so it was close to being done, you had gotten an update saying he was coming home in the middle of the night. If you or Bucky had a mission that ended late the other person would leave a meal in the fridge for when they got home, something easy to throw in the microwave.
“Hey,” you knew that voice from anywhere.
“Hi, Steve,” you said with your back to him. Nothing had changed since then and it had been over two months, Steve was slowly starting to adapt to you and Bucky showing affection in public but he still didn’t talk to you more than he needed to.
“What are you making?” you heard him pull out a bar standing at the island.
You were past trying to reconcile with him, he was the one acting like a child. “Pasta sauce, for Bucky,” you quickly added.
“Oh yeah, I heard he’s coming home tonight,” you could hear how uneasy Steve was, the way his voice slightly shook as he spoke to you.
You could feel his eyes burning holes in your back but you paid no mind, continuing to stir the pot and dodge the few bubbles. “Yep, late.”
“Yep…” Steve sighed but didn’t move, you could hear him just sit there.
Trying to meet him halfway was exhausting, it seemed there was nothing you could do to make him feel better except break up with Bucky. That wasn’t going to happen, it also helped that Bucky was very mature during this, always communicating with you about how he felt and if you needed anything. It further proved how immature Steve was, seeing that a man the same age was able to deal with their emotions perfectly.
FRIDAY came through on the speakers, “Sargent James’ jet is landing now.”
You spun around with a gasp, “he was supposed to be here at three in the morning,” you completely blew past Steve and ran to the land spot, laughing to yourself as you pictured hugging him.
The moment you opened the doors Bucky was already running to you, “there’s my girl!” he yelled and wrapped his arms around you the moment he could reach you, “no injuries for me, how was the month?” he whispered.
“Same as always,” you sighed, “but I’m so happy you’re home,” you nuzzled into his chest.
“He followed you outside, what’s that about?” you didn’t look over your shoulder, trusting Bucky was right. After pulling out of a hug Bucky called, “what are you doing out here?” towards Steve.
“I wanted to talk to you,” he was talking to Bucky, “I need to go for a walk with you.”
“Whatever you need to say can be said in front of y/n as well, bud,” Bucky wrapped his arm around you, “seeing as the situation involves her.”
“Look,” Steve walked up and rubbed the back of his neck, “I don’t fully approve of this but I do like the way you’re treating her, Buck, so…” he was awkward, not knowing how to word this because it seemed like a heat of the moment speech. “Yeah, I’m warming up to it.”
“Alright,” Bucky looked down at you, “I mean, that’s great but it doesn’t change anything about us, like,” Bucky laughed through the tension, “we’ve moved on like adults, I can honestly say we don’t care about what you think.”
“That’s a little intense,” you quickly added, “but I think what Bucky is trying to say is that we don’t need updates like this that you’re warming up to us dating because we are still going to date the same, your comfort is not a factor in our relationship.” you nodded and saw Steve’s face go red, “I hope one day we can be friends again and be buddies like before but right now, it’s team Bucky.”
Steve didn’t say anything else, he just watched you walk inside.
“Team Bucky?” he giggled in your ear, “I like it.”
You looked up at Bucky, “I have pasta sauce cooking, we can have it for dinner together.”
“Sounds good,” he kissed the crown of your head with his arm still wrapped around your waist, “can I make you a jersey that says team Bucky because I honestly love that?”
You laughed and fell into his side, “go for it,” he kissed you, “because it’s true.”
Main Masterlist  
Taglist: tag list:  @imtherain @jackiehollanderr @redneckstrash @tylard-blog1 @readingbooksdrinkingtea @linzc-reader @hotleaf-juice @honeybunchesofbucky @sky0401 @striving4averagegirl @seybox @yaszx @happyt0exist @honeybunchesofbucky @munsonettee @searchf0rtheskyline @aya-fay @emi11ie @wbyss​ 
if you would like to be added to the general tallest send as ask, I won’t respond but don’t worry - I’ve seen it!
3K notes · View notes
bossbtch1 · 6 months
Text
Shadows Of The Past
Tumblr media Tumblr media
The GIF and picture are not mine; credit goes to the respective artist/creator.
Summary : Bucky's nightmares have returned, and you wanted to make him feel better. However, both of you have different approaches in mind. Bucky then attempts to make a deal with you. What kind of offer will he propose, and will you accept it?
Pairing : Bucky Barnes x Reader (No mentions of body type or ethnicity other than the reader being female)
General tags : SMUT, 18, Porn with Plot
TW: Needy!Bucky, Gentle!Bucky, Fluff, Comfort, PTSD, Cuddling, Oral (f receiving), Fingering, Dirty talk, Unprotected sex, Rough Sex, Vaginal sex, Anal sex, Aftercare
Word Count: 7,5k
A/N : Hey there! As I promised, here's the first version of this story. Funny how it was meant to be short fic, but it turned into quite a story, huh? It's around 70% smut, but I've added some sweet fluff and comfort to the mix (so you won't get bored). So, go ahead, dive in! Hope you sin with me!
Tumblr media
While you were asleep, a sharp cry pierced the silence, jolting you awake. Your eyes flew open, and your heart raced as you realized the agonized sound came from Bucky. He thrashed against the blankets that had been wrapped snugly around him, his face contorted into a pained grimace, his body glistening with a sheen of sweat.
The nightmares that had haunted him before had returned, and it seemed they were more relentless than ever, plaguing him for weeks. He tried to keep his suffering from you, not wanting you to worry, but he could no longer hide his distress.
Amidst his cries, you could hear him desperately calling out your name, his voice laced with terror. "No! Please no, don't hurt her. Y/N! Y/N!"
Hearing him call for you, pleading with someone who wasn't there, broke your heart. You hated seeing him suffer, and you wished there was some way to ease his pain.
You wanted to blame Shuri, blame Wakanda, blame his therapist. They said he was free of his trigger words, so why couldn't he sleep? Why couldn't he be free from the nightmares?
With a racing heart, you reached out, gripping his quivering shoulder, "It’s okay Bucky,” you whispered, your voice soft but urgent. "You're just having a nightmare, baby. Everything's going to be okay. I'm right here. It's just a dream. Please, just wake up, baby,” you murmured, running your hand gently over his cheek.
But he remained trapped in his own subconscious torment, lost in the depths of his nightmare.
Desperation welled up inside you, and you shook him more vigorously, hoping to pull him back from the horrifying visions that plagued his sleep. "Bucky, please, come back to me. I'm here with you, and I'm safe."
Slowly, his body began to relax and he stopped thrashing, his eyes fluttering open. He sat up, breathing heavily as his eyes frantically searched the room, his face wet with tears.
"Hi, there you are." You smiled, trying to mask the pain in your heart. "It's okay. You were having a nightmare, but it's over now. You're awake. I'm right here. No one can hurt us."
He looked at you, his eyes full of fear, still trying to discern what was real. You could see the fear still lingering in his gaze as he recognized you. "Y/N?" his voice cracked with fear and confusion.
"Yes, Bucky. It's me. I'm right here. See?" taking his trembling hand and placing it over your heart, letting him feel the rhythmic beating.  "I'm okay. Everything's okay."
Bucky let out a sigh of relief when he felt the beating of your heart beneath his fingertips, and he wrapped his arms around you, pulling you close. "Thank god." Burying his face in the crook of your neck. His arms tightened around you as he breathed deeply, the tension slowly leaving his body as he relaxed.
"It's okay, it's over," you whispered reassuringly, running a hand through his hair soothingly.
"I'm so sorry, baby" he murmured against your skin, his lips ghosting over your collarbone, sending a shiver down your spine. "I didn't mean to wake you."
You cupped his face, looking into his eyes, seeing the exhaustion there. "It's okay, really. You don't need to apologize."
His gaze dropped, his fingers tracing idle patterns on the bare skin of your thigh. "I should be better. Stronger. You shouldn't have to deal with this."
"I told you I would be there for you no matter what, and I meant it," you insisted. "It's okay, Bucky," you whispered, holding him close and stroking his back soothingly. "It was just a dream. I'm right here, and I won't let anything harm you."
He clung to you, his grip tight as if he feared letting go would send him spiralling back into the horrors of his dreams. "Y/N," he murmured, his voice strained, "I thought... I thought I lost you.”
"You will never lose me, Bucky," you said firmly, cupping his face and looking him straight in the eye. "Never. I promise."
He let out a shuddering breath, his body relaxing at your words. His breathing began to steady as he focused on your presence, the reality of your touch grounding him. "I don't know what I'd do without you," he confessed, his voice barely audible.
"You don't have to know," you whispered, pressing a soft kiss to his forehead. "You have me, I'll always be here with you. And I'm not going anywhere."
Slowly, the panic receded, the adrenaline subsiding. His grip on you loosened, but he kept his arm around you, needing the reassurance of your touch.
Your fingers carded through his hair, gently working through the knots. "Would you like to talk about what happened?" you asked, your voice gentle and understanding.
He shook his head slightly, his lips forming a hesitant smile. "Not right now. Just being with you is enough."
"Okay, we can just lay here and cuddle. I love cuddling with you." You pressed another kiss to his forehead.
He smiled up at you, his blue eyes meeting yours. "I love you."
You wiped sweat from his face, kissing his temple. "I love you too."
He sighed, closing his eyes and settling back against your chest, listening to the steady beat of your heart. "Thank you, baby. I'm sorry I keep waking you up like this. I don't know why I can't just let go of these nightmares."
"Shush, it's okay, Bucky. You don't need to say sorry.” Your voice was soft, your touch tender as you caressed his face. "We'll face this together. You're not alone."
His eyes met yours, and he gave you a small smile. Then you noticed both of your glasses were empty on the nightstand. As you tried to get up to fetch some water, Bucky caught your hands, holding them gently but firmly. "Where are you going?"
"Just to the kitchen," you replied. "Don't worry, I'll be right back. I'll get us some more water.”
“No, please. Don't go. Just stay with me." He tightened his arms around you, not letting go.
"Please," he pleaded, his voice strained. You could see the panic and desperation in his eyes, the fear of losing you still lingering in his mind.
You didn't want to leave him, and you had never seen him so distraught. You felt his grip tighten around your waist, his arms holding you close to him.
"Okay Bucky, I’ll stay. I’m not going anywhere," you whispered, laying back down beside him. He curled up against you, burying his face in the crook of your neck and clinging to you as if he were afraid you would disappear.
He curled up against you, burying his face in the crook of your neck and clinging to you as if his life depended on it. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I don't mean to be like this.”
You held him tighter as you murmured soft reassurances. "Shh, it's okay, Bucky. You have nothing to be sorry for. I'm here for you."
"Is there anything I can do to make you feel better? To help you relax?" Your fingers gently stroked his hair as you placed soft kisses on his forehead, offering him the comfort and security he desperately needed.
He looked at you, his gaze intense, the look in his eyes darkening with desire. "No. No." You knew where this was going.
"Why not baby? You know it will make me feel better." His mood changed in an instant, and he suddenly looked predatory, like a wild animal ready to devour its prey.
He didn't even wait for an answer as his lips captured yours in a heated kiss, his hands roaming your body hungrily. He kissed and sucked your neck, his hand trailing down to your thigh and stroking your skin teasingly. He was already hard against your leg.
You broke the kiss, "Bucky no…”
He moved in and began to kiss the nape of your neck, making you moan. "Just a little? I'll be good to you, baby." He said in his best innocent voice. "Please, I need you." he breathed against your neck, his teeth nipping at the sensitive skin.
“We can't keep doing this. Dr. Raynor is very clear about this." Dr. Raynor, his therapist said this wouldn't help him, that it would just be a distraction every time and wouldn't actually help him through his trauma. You both had agreed that she was right.
"Screw the doctor, Y/N. I want you." He pecked a quick kiss to your lips and looked into your eyes, a pleading expression on his face. His hands were everywhere, touching and exploring every inch of your body.
"Will you help me forget about it?" He moved lower to between your thighs. Bucky lifted his head from between your legs and looked at you, "Will you let me pleasure you, my love?"
"No, Bucky. We can't." You said sternly even though your pussy getting wetter by the second. "You know it's not just my decision. We both agree," you whimpered as his finger kept hovering above your pussy, barely touching.
“Mm… I know…” He hummed. “But, I can also see you're getting wet." He slid his hand to touch your panties, rubbing your pussy, feeling the wetness seep through the fabric. "I don't think you want me to stop, doll."
"Mmmm," you moaned and tried to keep yourself from squirming under him. His thumb brushing over your clit and causing you to buck into his touch.
As much as you wanted to give in, you couldn't. You slapped his hands away and sat up. "You know the effect you have on me. That's not something I can control." You said, annoyed.
Then he trailed his hands over your breasts and cupped them, squeezing and kneading, his thumb circling your hardening nipples through the fabric of your dress. You arched your back and pressed into him.
"Doll. Please? I just need a little taste. I'll be good. I'll eat you out, lick your pussy and make you come, let me taste you.” He said, begging, his voice pleading.
You took a deep breath, trying to keep the last bit of your composure. You "Ah! No…” You grabbed his wrist. "I'll do anything for you, but this is not the way. We're not having sex, Bucky."
He grabbed your waist, his hands gripped your hips tightly as he leaned forward, his lips just a breath away from yours.
"If it's going to make you better..." he guided your hand to his crotch, and you could feel how hard he was through his sweats. "You feel that? One look at you and this happened." You wanted to stroke him, but you needed to stay strong, for him.
"Bucky, stop," you pulled away your hand and looked at him. "We talked about this. Why can't you be reasonable?"
"Alright, what if we made a deal?" He asked.
"A deal?" You raised an eyebrow.
"Yes. A deal."
"Go on." You were intrigued.
"No sex, no intercourse, no penetration. How about if I promise that I won't try anything, you let me have a taste. Let me please you."
"Hard pass. You said that the last time and we knew what happened. No." You said firmly, recalling the last time.
"C'mon doll, please? I'll be on my best behavior," he kissed your cheek and whispered in your ear, "I'll make it worth your while, I promise."
"No deal. You're a terrible influence, Bucky Barnes." You moved away from him.
He groaned and leaned closer and bit your ear lightly. You shivered and turned your head slightly. "Okay, if you let me fuck you right now, I'll go see that doctor tomorrow," he offered, and his lips moved over the pulse point on your neck.
You could feel your breath hitching, "Really? You'd go see her willingly?" You beamed at his progress. But you didn't want to cave in yet and give him what he wanted, "But you need to see her regularly after this.”
"How often?" He said, he sucked on your neck, leaving a mark, and started to move on top of you.
"Twice a week, at least," you replied, closing your eyes and enjoying his body against yours as he rubbed his hard-on against you, teasing you through the thin material.
“And what do I get on my end? If I do all that for you, I need something in return. It's a deal. Right?"
"Right," you replied. You thought of what you should do with him. What could you offer in exchange. "You get me?" It sounded absurd even to your own ears. But the look on his face told you that was the best thing you could offer.
Bucky chuckled, "Hmm. That's a very tempting offer." You could see him smiling, and his hands caressing your waist. "But I already got you. Try again, sweets."
You could see how his blue eyes were shining with lust. His pupils dilated, and he licked his lips, his eyes not leaving yours. You could feel his excitement rubbing against your inner thighs.
He moved his hand lower to under your breast. You stilled a moan when his thumb rubbed your nipple. "Okay then, we can have sex as often as you want."
Bucky hummed, and his fingers moved from your breasts to your belly, and lower. "As much as I love that idea, I already get you as often as I want.”
"Oh fuck." You breathed heavily, "Bucky, you're not being fair."
"Says the woman who wants me to go back to that old therapist, so she can dig into my head." He said, his fingers slipping between your legs. "She's annoying. And she asks too many questions."
"She's not annoying. She's just doing her job," you defended Dr. Raynor. Bucky shrugged.
"Fine, I'll suck you off." You could feel yourself getting more and more wet, you wanted him now, but you held back, not yet, not until he agreed to go see Dr. Raynor.
"That's not a bargain, that's just a normal day for us." He said, teasing. "Come on, what are you willing to give me?" He grinned and his tongue traced the outer edge of your ear.
“You're not playing fair." You whined.
"Oh but, baby. I never play fair. So, what are you offering?" He licked your neck and kissed it.
You bit your lips, you knew what to say. You knew exactly what to say. But the only thing is, would you say it? You stared to his blue eyes, those blue ocean that was full of desire.
You stared to his blue eyes, those blue ocean that was full of desire. "Well?" He said, his thumb flicked your lips.
You swallowed hard, your voice barely audible. "You can put it in my ass," you whispered.
Bucky's movements stilled, his eyes narrowing in surprise and confusion. He leaned back slightly, studying your face intently. "I didn’t hear you," he said, his tone demanding an explanation. "What was that?"
Your cheeks flushed with embarrassment, but you gathered your courage. With a steadying breath, you spoke louder, your voice carrying more conviction this time. "I said, you can put your dick in my ass."
His lips twitched and his eyes crinkled. "Y/N. Look at me." You shook your head, feeling shy.
He moved his hand and took your chin and turned your face towards him. "Are you sure?" He asked, a serious expression on his face.
"Yes," you replied, your voice quivering slightly. "If you agree to go to Dr. Raynor, if you see her and promise to work with her, I'll let you fuck me in the ass."
"Baby, please, don't," he pleaded, his voice laced with both concern and guilt. "I don't want you to force yourself."
"No, no, no, I'm okay. I want this. I'm willing to try. Beside I’ve been thinking about this. So, no. I'm not forcing myself." You reassured him.
"Fuck. Are you sure, baby girl? This is a big step. I can wait. You know that, right? You're worth the wait. If you're not ready, you should tell me. It's not like we're rushing it."
"I'm ready, Bucky. I trust you," you said, your voice firm yet gentle. You paused, your eyes locking onto his, determination shining through. "However, there's a new condition. You need to see your Dr. Raynor regularly. Make it three times a week," you added, your tone unwavering.
He looked at you, his expression conflicted. You didn't want him to back down, "And I will make it worth your while. I'll let you do anything you want with me."
A mischievous smirk played on his lips, a glint of amusement in his eyes. "Anything, huh?" he teased.
"Within reason," you quickly clarified, clearing your throat, ensuring there were boundaries even in your desperation to help him.
"Alright. It's a deal. Three times a week and I get to put it in your ass." Bucky agreed, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips. You couldn't help but smile too, relief flooding through you. You pulled him close, wrapping your arms around his neck.
"That's how you bargain, baby." He teased you.
“Just kiss me please.” You couldn’t resist him anymore. You missed his dick inside of you, missed the feeling of him thrusting inside you, filling you.
"Only because you asked nicely," he said, his voice tender, before leaning in to give you a quick kiss.
You moaned, "More." You begged, tugging at his hair.
He chuckled and crashed his lips into yours. He pulled you closer, kissing you fiercely. You moaned and opened your mouth, inviting his tongue in. He sucked and swirled his tongue around yours.
Your tongues danced together, fighting for dominance as his hands slid down your body. They landed on your ass and squeezed before he pulled away to pushed your shirt up to your neck, exposing your breasts.
He grinned as he stared at your breast. He cupped them, giving them a squeeze before his thumbs rubbed your hard nipples. You threw your head back and moaned.
He licked a stripe from between your breast to the valley, then to the other breast, giving it the same attention, licking and sucking, then biting lightly.
You moaned at his touch, your breast and your clit felt so sensitive, like you could come any minute. He grinned satisfied by your reaction, he loved how wet and sensitive you got for him. He kissed your neck, biting gently on your skin, leaving his mark on you, he wanted the whole world to know you were his.
"Now, first let me taste that delicious pussy of yours." You gasped as he pulled you toward him and knelt in front of you, putting your legs over his shoulders.
He placed his metal hand on your stomach, and he rubbed your inner thigh to opened your legs wider. He pushed your panties to the side, his hand slowly made his way down to your core, teasing you before inserting his fingers inside you.
You moaned at the sensation. "Bucky, please..." You moaned, desperate for his touch.
"Don't worry baby, I'll give you what you need." He slowly dragged your underwear down. You felt the cool air hit your wet pussy, and you shuddered.
He took a moment to admire the sight of you completely exposed to him, his eyes roamed over every inch of your body. His pupils were blown wide and you could see the desire in his eyes.
"You're so wet, so ready for me." He groaned, his breath tickling your inner thighs.
You felt the tip of his tongue lick a line up to your clit, and you felt a shockwave run through your body. He licked your slit from bottom to top, then he swirled his tongue on your clit, causing you to gasp loudly. He inserted a finger in and started to fuck you fast with his fingers, his tongue licking your clit.
He was so good, his tongue lapping your pussy like a starving man, lapping up your juices, teasing your clit and fucking your hole. You moaned loudly and made him chuckle, "So fucking responsive."
It felt amazing, the sensations of his tongue and fingers was almost too much, but not enough at the same time. His other hands travelled to your nipples, tugging and pulling them, the sensation going straight to your core. He knew exactly how to drive you insane, he was so good at this, and it was so hot.
You could feel your orgasm building, and you tried to hold back. You were so close, but you didn't want to come too soon.
"Do you like this, baby?" He asked, his voice low and husky.
“Yes, I do. It feels so good."
You felt his tongue deep inside of you, lapping and swirling up your juices, while his thumb pressed against your clit making your toes curled. You bucked your hips up to his face, searching for your release.
He added another finger, his fingers pumping in and out, and then curling, hitting the spot inside of you as he continued to eat you out. "I believe this is the spot that gets you going, baby."
"Yes, Bucky." You moaned loudly, not caring about anyone hearing.
His fingers kept stroking you, and his tongue was licking and flicking your clit. "Please don't stop."
"Come for me baby, scream my name." He pumped faster, curling his finger harder. He went up to your clit, sucking and biting. His flesh hand on your breast, twisting your nipples. He pinched your nipple hard, and you came.
Your orgasm hitting you hard. "Ahh. Bucky. Mmmhhh.. Yes, yes, ahh.."
He slowly stopped, his lips leaving your pussy. He pulled out his fingers and licked them clean, moaning at the taste. "Mmhh, so sweet."
"Thank you Bucky."  You pulled his head toward you so you could kiss him. He came up and kissed you passionately. You could taste yourself in his mouth and it was so hot.
"We're not done yet, babydoll," he murmured, his voice deep and husky, sending shivers down your spine. He held your gaze with intensity. "The deal is still on, but first, I need to fuck that tight pussy," he continued, his tone low and seductive, making your heart race with anticipation.
He pushed his briefs down exposing his rock hard erection. You bit your lip, admiring the sight in front of you. He was a very attractive man. His chiseled abs, his strong arms, his piercing blue eyes. And his cock, it never cease to amaze you how you can take him everytime.
Then he pushed your knees up and opened your cunt wide open. You felt so exposed and vulnerable, your pussy lips spread wide open as he moved forward.
You moaned again when his cock made contact with your dripping pussy. He teased you for a little while, rubbing the tip against your swollen folds.
"This going to be hard and fast. So get ready, babydoll."
He said as he began to push himself inside you. You were so wet that he slipped in easily, but the stretch still hurt. You let out a gasp. Your pussy lips wrapped around his cock and you felt his balls hitting against your ass. He then pulled back and slammed into you, making you moaned. He did this a couple of times, slowly fucking you.
"Fuck, baby, you feel so good." He groaned.
"Faster. Oh, Bucky. Please." You begged.
"As you wish." He smirked.
He picked up the pace, slamming into you. You felt his cock sliding in and out of your pussy, stretching your hole wide open. He was using all his strength to fuck you and you loved every second of it. You couldn't believe how good it felt. You were screaming his name and moaning, not caring about the world. All you cared about is the feeling of Bucky's cock pounding into you, hitting all the right spots.
"Oh Bucky, oh god, please don't stop." You felt his cock sliding in and out of your pussy, stretching your hole wide open. He held your legs tightly, preventing you from squirming.
Your legs were wrapped around his waist, as his hands gripped your hips. His fingers dug into your flesh, sure to leave bruises. But you didn't care. The only thing you were focused on is how good Bucky was fucking you.
"Do you like that, Y/N?" He said, his voice low and husky.
"Mhmm." You mumbled, too lost in pleasure to respond properly. He was fucking you so hard, you could feel his balls slapping against your ass.
"That's what I thought." He growled, leaning down and sucking on your nipple. You cried out as he bit down on your sensitive bud.
You felt your orgasm building up inside you. He started thrusting harder, and deeper, hitting your G-spot over and over again. "Oh, Bucky, I'm gonna cum!" You screamed.
"Milk my cock, baby.” He grunted. With that you felt your orgasm hit you hard. Wave after wave of pleasure swept through your body and you felt your pussy contracting around his cock.
He didn't stop pounding into you as you came, instead he fucked you harder, pushing you through your orgasm. He then pinned your arms above your head, leaving you completely helpless and at his mercy. "Bucky, please!"
"Oh no, baby, I'm not finished with you yet." His grip was so tight, and he continued to thrust into you. He used his one hand holding your hands there while he used the other to reach down and rub your clit. You moaned and arched your back, loving the feeling of his hands on you.
"That's right, keep doing that. Let me hear you."
You were lost in pleasure, completely oblivious to anything else around you. You were a quivering mess beneath him, and you couldn't form a coherent sentence.  This time it went much deeper than his normal thrusts. The pleasure was overwhelming. Your second orgasm was approaching, and you knew you couldn't last much longer.
"Oh yes, Bucky, I'm close. Please, fuck, oh god."
"I'm close too, babydoll. Come with me."
"YES! YES!" You screamed, reaching your second orgasm.
His thrust became more erratic, and you could tell he was about to come too. You felt his cock pulsing inside of you, and he let out a loud groan as he released his seed into you.
"Oh, fuck!" He cried out, his face scrunched up in pleasure.
You both rode out your orgasms together, his head falling onto your chest. Your legs were shaky, and your heart was pounding.
You both lay there, panting, trying to catch your breaths. You smiled as you looked up at him, "Wow. That was amazing."
"You're damn right, babydoll. You're so beautiful, and I love you so much." He replied, kissing your forehead.
He let you catch your breath first before leaning over, his eyes locking onto yours. "Are you ready for the main event now?" he said, a playful glint in his eyes as he winked at you.
"Yes." You said, nervously. You were both excited and nervous for what was about to happen. You had never done anal sex before, and you were scared that it would hurt.
"Don't worry, baby, I will make sure to be gentle. If it hurts, just tell me to stop and I will." He assured you by gently kissing your lips.
"I trust you, Buck." You smiled, feeling a little bit better.
He climbed off you and reached for a bottle from the nightstand drawer. "What's that?" you asked, your curiosity piqued.
He sat on the bed and opened the bottle. It was lube. "Oh." You blushed. "You had that just lying around?"
Sitting back on the bed, he opened the bottle. It was lube. "Oh." Your cheeks flushed with surprise. "You had that just lying around?" you asked, a hint of amusement in your voice.
"Yes. Just in case," he said, his tone nonchalant.
"In case of what?" you inquired, raising an eyebrow in playful curiosity.
"In case we did this," he replied, gesturing between the two of you, his eyes twinkling with mischief.
You couldn't help but giggle, realizing you had fallen right into his trap. "You cheeky bastard, were you planning this all along?" you teased.
He flashed you a grin, his eyes sparkling with mischief. "Well, let's say I had a hunch you might eventually succumb. Although, I must admit, this scenario played out differently than I imagined," he added, referring to being dragged to the therapist, his tone teasing yet affectionate.
"You're such a naughty man, James Buchanan Barnes," your eyes narrowing playfully.
"That's why you love me," he replied with a wink, his tone flirtatious.
A tender smile graced your lips, and you let out a soft sigh. "One of the many reasons," you confessed, your voice softening as you gazed at him with affection.
Then, there was a brief silence. Bucky broke the quiet, his voice laced with concern, "Are you sure you want to do this? I don't want to force you into something you're not comfortable with."
"I do, really. I'm just a bit nervous, you know? What if it hurts?"
His hand brushed a strand of hair from your face, his touch tender. "It might hurt, yes," he acknowledged. "But I will make sure it won't be long. If it becomes too much, you need to tell me, alright? I don't want you to keep it to yourself."
You nodded, "I trust you, Bucky. How do we do this?"
A reassuring smile curved his lips. "That means the world to me, Y/N."
His fingers traced delicate patterns on your skin, his touch soothing. "Well, I need to prep you first. " he whispered, his breath warm against your skin, sending shivers down your spine. "I need to make sure you're ready and lubed up, then I will ease myself into you."
With a deep breath, you closed your eyes, surrendering to the moment, trusting Bucky to guide you. "Okay," you said, your voice barely more than a breath. "Let's do this."
He opened the bottled and you shivered in anticipation. He poured a big amount of the liquid on his hand and spread it all over his member, giving special attention to the head.
He poured more lube on his hands and he pressed his lips against yours, kissing you softly. He gently pressed his finger against your entrance, circle your hole. You tensed up a bit, and he stopped. "Relax, doll. I'm just massaging you, don't be so tense. I need you to loosen up."
He kissed you again, and this time, you relaxed. He continued his ministrations, "I'm gonna try to enter one finger, okay? Let me know if you feel any discomfort."
You nodded and watched as he poured more lube on his fingers. Slowly pushing his finger past the ring of muscle and slowly eased it inside. You moaned as his finger slipped inside, stretching your walls. It was a weird sensation, and you felt a slight discomfort, but not a painful one.
"How does that feel, doll?" He asked, his voice low and husky. "Does it hurt?"
You took a deep breath, trying to adjust to the sensation. "Yes, it feels weird, but I'm okay. Don't stop," you assured him.
"That's normal," he said, his tone soothing, and he placed a soft kiss on your neck. "Just try to relax, okay?" His words were comforting, and you found yourself nodding, trusting him completely.
He was gentle and slow, taking his time. He started to move his finger, sliding it in and out, until he thought you were ready for a second one. He pushed the second finger inside, and you moaned.
"Do you like that?"
"Mmhmm." You moaned, your eyes closed.
He smiled, moving his fingers in and out, making sure to stretch you well.
"You think you're ready for a third one, sweetheart?"
"Yes, please."
He pushed the third finger in and you moaned, arching your back. The pain was still there but now, there was pleasure, and you were beginning to feel the pleasure taking over the pain.
"You’re doing so good, baby. I can't wait to fuck your ass, baby. I'm going to fill you up." He mumbled. kissing you deeply.
His kisses went down to your jawline and you moaned, gripping his hair. He curled his fingers inside and you screamed, arching your back.
"Does that feel good, doll?"
"God, yes! More, please." You begged, pushing your hips against his hand.
"Fuck, baby. Your ass feels so good. So tight and warm." He growled, licking your nipples, sucking on them, teasing you. His metal hand went to your clit, rubbing the sensitive bundle of nerves.
His hands and tongue were all over you, making you feel so good, so loved. You were squirming and moaning, digging your nails into his skin. You could felt your orgasm approaching.
"Please, Bucky. I need you. Please." You moaned, gripping his shoulders.
"I've got you, doll. Just hang on." He growled, he circling your clit and you cried out, the pressure feeling good, so good.
"Let me know who makes you feel this way." He whispered, his hot breath tickling your neck.
"Oh god! Yes! Bucky!” You cried as you came. You laid there panting, your chest heaving as you tried to catch your breath. You couldn't believe, you came from his finger on your ass.
"You're such a good girl, doll. So perfect, so beautiful. So amazing." He growled, pulling his fingers out of your ass.
"You okay, sweetheart?" He asked, rubbing his nose against yours.
"Yeah, that was... That was surprisingly good." You panted, smiling.
"Good.” He smiled brushing your hair, “I think you're ready for my cock now." He poured generous amount of lube to his cock. He stroked himself, getting his cock coated with the lubricant. "Are you ready?"
"Yes, I'm ready, Buck."
He cupped your face tenderly, his thumb caressing your cheek. "If it's too painful, tell me to stop, okay? Your comfort is my priority."
"I will, Buck."
You looked down at his hard cock as he got into position. He lined his cock on your entrance. Slowly, he entered you, making sure not to hurt you. It was a very different sensation. It didn't feel like you were being torn apart, but you did feel a slight burning sensation, and the fullness was quite intense.
"Oh, fuck!" He groaned. "God, baby, you're so fucking tight!”
You tensed, and Bucky hissed, he looked at you, his eyes clouded with lust. "Baby, you gotta relax. If you tense up, you'll make it more difficult for the both of us." He said, his breath labored.
You took a deep breath and exhaled, trying to relax. "Sorry, it just feels weird. But, don't stop, I'm okay." He moved in a bit further, and you bit your lip.
The more he pushed, the more you felt like he was tearing you apart. You whimpered and he stopped, caressing your face. "Baby... tell me if it hurt. Don't bear the pain. I can stop, if you want me to." He reassured you.
"I'm fine. Just getting used to the feeling. Don't stop."
He pushed further and further, and you cried out, clutching onto him. "You're doing so good, sweetheart."
When he was finally fully sheathed inside you, you both let out a sigh.
"Oh my God, Buck." You panted, moaning at the feeling. You immediately felt too full. You felt so full, and it felt so good. You were breathing hard, adjusting yourself to the size of his cock. Why did it have to be so huge? It would hurt less if it were a bit smaller.
"Are you okay, baby?"
"Yes, I'm fine. Just adjusting myself to your size. Fuck, you're so big. I feel so full.” You groaned.
"Where's the fun in being small, doll?" He smirked, biting his lips.
"Don't be cheeky," you retorted, rolling your eyes but unable to hide the smile tugging at your lips.
He kissed you, his tongue swirling with yours, and you moaned. He pulled away, a string of saliva still connecting your mouth to his. He wiped it off with his thumb and sucked it clean, licking his lips.
"Fuck. That's so hot, Bucky."
"You're taking my dick so well, doll. I can't believe it." He said. "I'm going to move now okay?" You nodded and he moved his hips, and you gasped. He started to move slowly, and you moaned, wrapping your arms around him, burying your face in his neck.
"Fuck, you feel so good. So warm, so tight."
Bucky was moving so slow, it was almost torture. He was so slow and gentle, treating you as if you were a fragile porcelain doll. You could see how hard he tried to hold himself back, his eyes closed, and his teeth clenched.
"You can move faster, you won't hurt me." You told him.
"Doll, I don't want to hurt you. You're still so fucking tight, and it takes everything in me to hold back."
"It's not gonna hurt, Buck. Please, don't hold back. Just do it." You begged.
“Tell me if you need me to slow down or stop, okay?"
He pulled out almost completely and slammed back in, making you moan. You moaned and wrapped your legs around his waist, making him go even deeper. He groaned, and you whimpered, digging your nails into his flesh.
"Yes, yes." You braced yourself again. The sound of your skin slapping was loud and obscene, and the feeling was overwhelming.
"Ah, Bucky, it's so good." You moaned, feeling him pounding into you.
He leaned in to kiss you, his tongue exploring your mouth. You moaned into his mouth. "You gave me your first time, doll. Thank you." He whispered.
He moved his hips faster, and you cried out, you could feel him speeding up. He was panting, his forehead pressed against yours. You started moving your hips with him, meeting him with every thrust.
"Fuck. You're such a good girl. Taking my cock like this."
You were a moaning mess. The only words that came out from your mouth were his name and incoherent babble.
"Faster, Bucky, please!" You urged him.
He complied and picked up the pace. He started thrusting into you faster and deeper. He was fucking you hard and fast. The headboard of the bed was slamming on the wall. You were lost in the sensation.
"Is this what you want, babydoll? You want me to fuck your ass roughly, don't you?"
"Oh god, Bucky! Yes, yes!" You moaned.
"What a bad girl, wanting to get her ass fucked.” He brushed your hair from your face and stared at you as he fucking you. “God, Y/N, you look so fucking sexy. Your breasts bouncing and jiggling, the way your mouth hang open as you scream my name, the way you're clenching around my cock. You're fucking perfect."
His words went straight to your core, "Oh Bucky, you feel so good." You moaned, feeling yourself clench around his dick.
Bucky pounded harder, making sure to hit that spot every time. You moaned and cried as the pleasure intensified. You couldn't even think straight. You couldn't remember what was going on, or why, all you could think of was the feeling of Bucky's cock inside you.
"Are you close, baby?" He asked.
"So close." You gasped.
Bucky continued thrusting, chasing his orgasm. His movements were erratic and frantic. He pounded into you, his balls slapping against your skin. "I’m close too. I'm gonna come, doll. Where do you want me to come? Do you want me to pull out?"
"No! Don't stop! Please don't stop!" You cried.
Bucky's movements were frantic and wild. His breathing was labored and his moans were louder than before. "Fuck! I'm gonna come!" He yelled.
You were seeing stars as you screamed his name, coming around his cock. You could hear him grunting, and soon enough he came too, his cock pulsing inside you. You felt him spilling his load into you, his hot come filling your ass. He kept thrusting until he was done.
He collapsed on top of you, his sweaty chest sticking to yours. You were panting, trying to catch your breath. He kissed your neck and rolled to the side, taking his spent dick out of you. You hissed and felt a trail of cum falling from your hole.
"You did so great, baby. I can't believe it. How are you feeling? Does it hurt?" He caressed your cheeks.
You turned to face him, a smile on your face. "Yes, I'm sore. But it was worth it. Thank you, Bucky.”
"You are such a perfect girl for me. Thank you, doll. I love you."
You were so tired afterwards, he overstimulated you. You came too many times and you could barely speak. He held you and kissed your forehead, whispering how proud he was of you.
You were lying there with him as he stroked your hair, humming a soft melody. The room smelled of sex, but you didn’t care. All you wanted was to be in his arms. Your muscles and ass would be sore the next day, but it was worth it. It was a special experience and you couldn’t be happier.
"Stay here, I'm going to clean you up." He went to get up and get a towel, he knew you were too sore to move.
"You don't need to, just lie down with me."
"But you are a mess. We both are. I need to take care of you. You are the one that has my seed inside you."
"Bucky, please," you pleaded softly, not wanting him to go through the trouble.
He didn't listen to you. He gently kissed your forehead before getting up and walking over to the bathroom, giving you a perfect view of his toned toned ass. You giggled and shook your head, he was such a dork. He came back with a warm wet towel.
When he came back, you couldn't help to admire how hot he looked right now, his body glistening with sweat and all messy, thoroughly fucked. He was still naked, standing in front of you, his cock hanging between his legs.
As he returned, his eyes caught yours, and a faint smile tugged at the corners of his lips. "What are you smiling about?" he asked.
You bit your lip, trying to hide your amusement, but it escaped in a soft giggle. "I'm just enjoying the view." you replied with a playful grin.
He chuckled, the sound sending a pleasant shiver down your spine. "Well, I'm glad you find it enjoyable," he teased, his eyes lingering on your face before he shifted his gaze down your body, and then back up again. "I must say, the feeling is quite mutual."
Your cheeks flushed with warmth at his boldness. "Smooth talker, aren't you?"
He grinned, his confidence infectious. "Only when I'm around someone as stunning as you."
You rolled your eyes playfully, but the compliment had its intended effect, making you feel both flattered and a little bashful. "You know how to charm a girl, Sergeant Barnes."
He winked at you, his smile turning into a smirk. "I aim to please."
He crawled into bed with you, Bucky gently began cleaning you up, his touch gentle yet firm. You were exhausted and sore, and in that moment, his care felt like a lifeline.
He spread your legs and started cleaning you up, removing the cum and wetness that was leaking from your entrance. "Are you okay? I wasn't too rough, was I?" he asked, looking at you with concern.
"You were perfect, baby. This is exactly what I wanted. I'm so happy right now.” You said and smiled at him.
He ran the warm cloth along your thigh, and then did the same to your other leg. His hair was messy, but his eyes were sparkling with contentment. You couldn’t help but stare at him, mesmerized by the sight of him.
He broke the silence, his voice heavy with the weight of his confession, "It was Zemo."
"Huh?" You were too mesmerized with his beauty, so you didn't pay attention.
His jaw clenched with the memory, as he wiped you clean, gently. "My nightmare." He began, his voice strained. "We were back at the Berlin facility, and he was talking about Sokovia. He wanted me to become the Winter Soldier again. But I couldn't, not after everything I've been through. I couldn't go back to that darkness."
His voice cracked, and you could feel his pain as if it were your own. "But then he said that you were going to get killed instead. I didn't have a choice, I had to do it. I was fighting myself, trying to break free and reach you, but I was trapped, helpless, and just screaming..."
His breathing became rapid, shallow gasps escaping his lips. "Hey... hey..." you murmured, gently bringing his face to meet your gaze. His eyes were clouded with fear, refusing to meet yours directly.
"Bucky, look at me," you implored, your voice soft yet unwavering.
His blue eyes finally bore into yours, searching for solace amidst the storm of his thoughts. "It wasn't real. I'm here, safe and sound, and so are you. You're safe now. He's gone," you assured, your words carrying a soothing cadence.
Moving closer, you delicately stroked his face, your touch a balm to his turmoil. A tender kiss landed on his forehead, a silent promise of security. "Zemo is not here, and neither is HYDRA. You are safe, and I am safe. They can't hurt us anymore."
He remained silent, his vulnerability laid bare before you.
"You can't change the past, Bucky," you continued, your voice gentle but firm. "It's behind us, and we have to live in the present. We're together now, and that's all that matters. I'm not going anywhere."
"Yeah? You promise?"
"Of course, I do. I'm not leaving you, Bucky." You tried to lighten up the mood, “Where else can I find someone that can fuck me like you?”
He laughed, “Yes, no one allowed to fuck you. Only me.” He was getting possessive. He hugged you tightly and kissed your forehead. "Thank you baby, thank you for everything. I love you, babydoll."
"I love you too, Bucky. Get some sleep. You need rest."
"I love you more, doll. Sleep well."
He cleaned himself up, then lay next to you and covered you with a blanket. He cuddled up close and wrapped his arm around your waist. You snuggled up against his chest, closing your eyes.
Tumblr media
A/N : Woah congrats, I'm glad you can make it till the end with how long the smut is. Is it to your liking? Gentle and Needy Bucky are in my top 3 so I've been really wanting to make this kind of story. That aftercare especially ugh I feel like it doesn't get enough attention.
Stay tuned for version 2 - it's going to be packed with angst, fluff, and some hurt/comfort, maybe with a touch of mild smut. Is that something you're interested in? Let me know!
Tumblr media
If you guys like my story, please check out my other stories : masterlist
Happy sinning! (is that a word? lol)
767 notes · View notes
peachbottom · 3 months
Text
Period.
Tumblr media
Authors Note: Hi sorry I haven’t posted in months, but I have this that has been sitting in my notes for ever so here you go. Please leave feedback sorry if you hate it
Summary: When you unexpectedly get your period in the middle of a special moment, don’t worry Bucky makes its all feel better don’t be embarrassed. <3
Warnings: Potential maybe allusions to smut but no actual smut, non sexual nudity, periods, fluff, bad grammar, not edited
——————————————————————————All day you had been looking forward to going home, taking a shower and spending time with bucky. Your back hurt, you were tired and just overall feeling down. Thankfully it was Friday and all the worries of the week will wash away with the weekend.
Bucky was supposed to get home half an hour after you, he was out with Steve and Sam for the day and you couldn’t wait till he got home. When you walked into your shared apartment you dropped your stuff and went straight to the bathroom. You started a nice hot shower, put on some relaxing music and did all the steps you’re usually too lazy to do in the shower.
You must have been really into it because you didn’t hear the front door open or even the bathroom door. You did hear the shower door open though, to reveal a very pretty, very happy Bucky. He was standing holding his shirt in his hand, buckle undone and barefoot, ready to join you if you’d have him.
“Oh Jesus bucky you scared me”
“It’s hard to hear over the shower and music. Mind if I join you baby?”
“Yeah sure” you say while trying to maintain warmth under the water while the draft of cold air blows in from the open shower door bucky stands at.
He drops his shirt then pulls down his jeans and boxers in one motion. He steps out of them and soon enough he’s right next to you holding you close. He leans down to kiss the spot on your neck that he knows makes you giggle every time. True love is about knowing someone inside and out, and Bucky makes it a point to know you in all the ways.
After a little romantic and steamy shower where you washed each other and got a little excited, you and Bucky decided to move the moment to the bedroom. You wrapped up in a towel and moved to sit on the bed, bucky climbing on top of you with a towel slung low on his hips.
“You are so pretty, baby I can’t believe I get all this” he says as he plants kisses one by one down your body. You just feel an overwhelming need to kiss him, to show your love for him. So you reach down and lace your fingers through his hair and pull lightly on his roots.
He looks up at you, forgetting his prior mission of covering your body in kisses. You stick out your lips in a pouty kissy face so he understands what you want.
“Oh honey you want kisses? I can do that.” He leans down to lay next to you and pulls you on top of him. As he pulls you up to kiss you, you let out a small uncomfortable groan but he doesn’t let it go unnoticed.
“What’s wrong, are you okay?” He’s quick to address the situation and try to find the problem. He holds you gently and looks at you as if he’s waiting for you to tell him the most important thing in the world.
“My stomach just hurts, I’m okay it’s been like this all day. Just shush and kiss me already.” And if James Barnes is good at one thing it’s following directions, so kiss you he does. It’s passionate and slow, sweet but firm. It’s perfect and comfortable and it helps melt away all the bad of the day.
As you continue to kiss him you feel desire burning in your lower body, you feel wetness forming between your legs and you can’t wait for what comes next.
You feel Bucky’s hands wander lower towards your towel. He undoes the knot you have holding it up, letting it come loose around your body and allowing him access to your chest. He presses his hands in between your bodies to gently toy with your nipples and encourage the soft breathy sounds from your mouth.
You slowly grind your hips down into Buckys, feeling his hard length through the towel. He lets out a soft moan when you grind down harder, continuing to play with your breasts he makes a noise to roll you over again.
He slips his left arm around your back holding you close as he drives up with his hips and flips you over so he’s on top. He plants one last kiss on your lips and nips at your lower lip before making his way down your body again.
“Doll I love you so much, you are everything to me.” Bucky had a big smile on his face ready so feast in between your legs like a starved man. As he moved down your body he removes your towel and grabs your thighs to make room for himself between them. As he parts your legs his smile falters.
“Oh, um”
Immediately you spring up from your laying position to see what was wrong. Red, it was all red. The inside of your thighs were covered in blood along with the towel and other things.
“I think you got your period baby, do you want to get back in the shower and we-“
You don’t even listen to what he has to say, you are so mortified you jump up and run off into the bathroom. Nothing he could say or do would make you feel any less embarrassed that his face was inches from your blood covered body.
You lock yourself in the bathroom making sure Bucky wasn’t coming in. That’s when you let out a silent tear, you feel the oncoming tears and try to hold them back. Thinking quickly you turn on the shower to drown out the sobs of embarrassment. You knew something was wrong today but you never even thought to consider this as the reason.
Gently stepping into the shower you wipe your tears and try to tuck away the mortification, it’s not helpful but at least you stop crying. You start to wash the insides of your thighs and your center. Just then you hear a knock on the door, loud but not aggressive.
“Honey, babydoll please let me in. I need to know you’re okay.” Buckys voice is still heard over the sound of the water and through the door.
“I’m fine.” You say back, voice cracking through the tears threatening to spill. If it wasn’t for his super solider hearing he probably wouldn’t have heard you. Then you hear him let out a soft sign and an “okay” before he retreats away from the door.
The fact that he would walk away to fast without trying harder makes you kinda sad. Maybe he doesn’t care that much or maybe you really grossed him out. But another part of you is happy he walked away so you can clean in peace.
Once you finish cleaning yourself you step out of the shower, look for a tampon, thankfully you have some, then wrap yourself up ready to face bucky. You wish you could lock yourself in the bathroom forever but unfortunately you have to face the embarrassment at some point
Opening the door you walk into the bedroom to see candles lit, the tv playing a movie, your heating pad plugged in and some comfortable pajamas folded neatly at the edge of the bed. As you take a second to take it all in a smile comes to your face as you think about bucky doing this for you. Just then bucky comes back from in the kitchen with a hot mug of tea in his hand. He slips right past you into the room to place the mug on your bedside table.
“Bucky” you whisper through a cracking voice as tears threaten to break through again. He’s quietly turns around and walks up to you with outstretched arms. His one arm goes around your lower back and the other cradles your head into his chest.
“It’s all okay, why don’t we get you comfortable and we can watch a movie. No pressure for anything else, okay?”
You nod and look up at bucky, still tears brimming your eyes. He uses both thumbs to swipe gently under your eyes and places a soft kiss to your lips.
He leads you over to the edge of the bed telling you to sit down next to the folded clothes. Gently he reaches out to where you are still holding your towel, “Can I, sweetheart?” You shyly let him remove your towel, still crawling with embarrassment from earlier.
The towel falls around you as you look down at your lap avoiding eye contact. “Baby please look at me, I want to see your pretty face. Come on gorgeous let me see your eyes.” You slowly lift your gaze to meet his eyes, “Thats my girl, good girl baby” he softly strokes your hair from your face while praising you for simply looking at him.
“I know your being really brave and vulnerable with me right now and I know what’s hard for you but your doing so well baby, so good for letting me help you and take care of you.” His words make your heart skip a beat, he makes you feel so seen and understood.
As he reaches for your pajamas he keeps one hand on your thigh, softly stroking the skin. He grabs a pair of comfortable underwear from the top of the stack, letting it unfold before he grips your thigh right above the knee and picks your leg up, sliding his hand down to your calf putting your foot through one hole. He places your leg down and does it again to your other leg, sliding the underwear up your body.
“Lift up for me sweetheart” he speaks softly into your ear as he supports your body and pulls the underwear past your butt. He eases you down to the mattress before grabbing one of his tshirts to pull over your head. You both laugh a little as he pulls your head through the hole and fixes your hair from how messy the shirt made it.
He hooks his arms under yours and lifts you into his chest, moving one arm to support under your butt. He moves the towel off the bed and pulls down the blankets with the other. Crawling into bed with you still wrapped around him, he makes sure you’re nice and comfy before pulling the blankets up around you.
He holds you close and kisses your forehead without saying anything, just watching the movie. “I’m sorry, I should have known better that was really gross and I’m sorry” you say softly, it’s all you could think about you had to say something.
He pulls back looking at you, he seems almost hurt. “Oh baby, no. Don’t ever, ever feel bad about anything like that. It’s natural and your body is healthy and that’s what matters baby. It’s not gross and I’m not upset, I just want to make sure you are okay, okay? It’s all fine, no need to be upset or embarrassed.” You want to cry again and he can see it. “Oh no don’t cry please don’t cry I don’t want you upset.” He kisses your nose and all over your face while running his hand up and down your side squeezing at your hip.
“You’re just so perfect, and i can’t thank you enough for being so kind and gentle with me. I’m so sorry for ruining your night!” You cry into his arms and he holds you like it’s all okay.
“Nothing is ruined it’s all okay, I’m here with the you. Yeah maybe I’m disappointed we aren’t going to have sex but I’m not upset because I know you aren’t comfortable. Do you understand I’m not upset, I’m not angry or grossed out by you. I still think you are gorgeous and amazing even if you are crying all over me.”
You pull away from him a little bit to laugh, you really cried all over him. He rubs your back some more and lets you breathe for a minute. You can’t help but feel bad about ruining the mood, he was ready to go and you just ran away.
“Is it really okay? We can just watch a movie and cuddle and you won’t be mad?” You ask while rubbing away tears.
“Of course baby, let’s watch our movie while I hold you. Do you need anything, pain medicine or something? Oh I got you tea, here you go” He leans over and grabs the tea from the bedside table and helps you sit up, slowly handing you the mug.
“Oh thank you” you carefully take the mug and take a little baby sip, delicious.
Bucky rubs your back and rest his head on your shoulder while adjusting ur heating pad in your lower stomach. He asks calmly if it was in a good spot and then continues to rub up and down your body.
You place your now empty tea cup on the bedside table and then roll into Bucky even more. “Thank you, I feel so much better now” he kisses the top of your head in response.
“Go to sleep honey I’ll be here when you wake up, I love you so much”
——————————————————————————
Masterlist
196 notes · View notes
lives-in-midgard · 1 year
Text
You'll never be alone
Tumblr media
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader
Summary: Bucky comforts reader after a family dinner.
Word Count: 930
Masterlist
Yesterday you were at your parents’ home for a family dinner and because it was late you texted Bucky that you were sleeping there. Because he knows how your parents sometimes can be, he asked you if everything is okay and you texted him of course back, so he assumed that it was.
After he had breakfast Bucky started to worry that you weren’t okay. He looked at his phone and haven’t got any message from you. Normally you would always send him a good morning text with I love you and a heart emoji when someone of you is away. But this morning you haven’t even texted him back, which made him wonder if everything was okay. At first, he thought maybe the internet connection wasn’t good or something, so he waited for a while and took a quick shower, but you haven’t texted him back after that either. So, he decided to go downstairs to the others and maybe someone else knew something or you just got home.
“Do you guys know something from y/n?” Bucky asked the other avengers when he walked in the living room and couldn’t see you there. His hope that you were there and the internet connection wasn’t good immediately disappeared.
“I think she is still at her parents’ home.” Steve said and Bucky could see a confused look on Wanda’s face.
“She didn’t go to your room last night?” Wanda asked while she turned the TV off.
“What do you mean Wanda?” Bucky asked her.
“She came home last night. I only saw her for a few minutes, but she looked sad. I talked to her and thought she was going to you because she said she would.” Wanda said and Bucky began to worry and thought what might had happened at your parents’ home that made you so upset that you didn’t even want to go to him.
“But y/n texted me that she is staying there. I should have known that something is off. I’m... I’m her boyfriend. I should have known that she is not fine like she texted me and when she only sent a good night instead of calling me.” Bucky started to walk through the room and Steve and Wanda looked at each other. Steve stood up from the couch, walked up to Bucky and placed his hand on Bucky’s shoulder.
“You should go up and check on her, Buck.” Steve suggested him and Bucky nodded.
“You are right I’ll go to her to make sure she is okay.”
When he stood in front of your door, Bucky took a deep breath and made a gentle knock on the door with the hope that you were okay.
"Hey doll, it's me Buck." He said in a soft tone but didn't hear a response from you. When Bucky was quiet for a moment, he could hear you sniffle.
"Doll, I'm coming in okay." When he didn't hear a response from you, he opened the door. There was not much light coming through the curtains, but Bucky could see you laying there facing the other side of the room and covered in your soft blanket. He walked over to your side and kneeled down in front of you.
"Hey, doll." Bucky lifted his arm and gently stroked your cheek with his hand.
You began to sniffle "I’m..." You paused.
"It's okay doll, you don't have to talk." Bucky said and wiped with his thumb a tear from your cheek away.
"Do you want me to cuddle you?" He asked and you nodded.
"Okay, doll." Bucky said and gave you a kiss on the forehead. He stood up and climbed into the bed and wrapped his arms around you from behind.
"I've got you doll. Everything is gonna be alright, I promise." Bucky said while you sobbed and gave you a kiss on your shoulder. Bucky was holding you as long as you needed him and whispered some calming words into your ear while giving you kisses. After a while you calmed down a bit and were ready to say something.
"Why am I never enough?" You said and it was quiet for a moment.
"You are enough, maybe not for your parents but for me you are more than enough. You saved me, you were there for me when I was feeling so low and thought no one could ever love me. You came and saved me like an angel... you are my angel." A smile began to grow on your face, what Bucky has just said was more than a I love you it was so much more.
"You don't need your parents to be happy you have me, and you'll never be alone, I promise." Bucky continued to say and you turned around in his arms and faced him with a smile.
"Thank you, babe. You're right I'll never be alone I have you and the other dorks downstairs." You said and made him chuckle.
"I love you."
"I love you more." Bucky said with a smile.
"That's impossible."
"But it is true. I love you more."
"No, I love you more." You continued to say when suddenly Bucky leaned in and kissed you to stop you from talking.
"Okay, you win." You said when you broke the kiss and Bucky grinned at you. You cuddled up with him and placed your head on his chest and listened to his heartbeat.
"Try to sleep my angel." Bucky whispered and you could feel how you were falling asleep in his arms.
725 notes · View notes
Text
i’ve got you | b.b
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x GN!Reader
Summary: Reader has a panic attack and Bucky comforts them.
Warnings: panic attacks, headaches, hyperventilating, pet names (sweetheart, hun)
Words: 664
Masterlist | Request Guidelines
Tumblr media
(my gif :))
Bucky is well aware of your anxiety and does his best to help you, despite you not always making it easy on him.
You’d been doing fine for a few days, but there was always that buzzing under the surface. You could feel it rising and you knew you’d need to check out for a bit. You knew the super soldier would find you, follow the sound of your breathing; he couldn’t help himself.
Nonetheless, you tried to hide yourself away, hating the idea of being a burden. Your heart picked up as you made your way down the halls and you cursed under your breath, picking up your pace. You ducked around a corner, your knees weakening suddenly and you groaned in annoyance as you slid down the wall. You would’ve preferred more privacy, but the compound was quiet today and this would have to do.
You let your head fall against the wall and tried to control your breathing. Somewhere beyond the rushing blood in your ears, you sensed his not-so-light footfalls.
Bucky found you straight away, his instincts leading him right to you. He rounds the corner to find you sitting against a wall and breathing heavy. He rushes over to you and kneels in front of you, his voice quiet and with a barely restrained quality as he speaks to you.
"Heeey sweetheart, it's all okay. Can you look at me?"
"It’s f-fine, Buck. I'll be okay, I just need a minute. It just, it just n-needs to run its c-course then i'll be fine,” you ground out between breaths. You just wanted to be alone, embarrassed at the way you were practically gasping for breath. You'd be lying though if you said you weren’t comforted by his presence.
"No, hun. You’re gonna hurt yourself, you need to slow your breathing."
“Demanding,” you attempted to joke but just end up coughing. Your erratic breathing is starting to take its toll; you’re hyperventilating now and you can feel yourself getting dizzy as your chest starts to ache.
At the edge of your vision, you see Buckys hands raising towards you, but it slows before it can reach you.
"Can I touch you sweetheart?"
You nod a little as you fight to get air. He was always so careful. You teased him for it on your good days, but you were grateful.
He adjusts so he's sitting next to you against the wall and puts his arm around your shoulders. He takes one of your hands in his and places it over his heart.
"Just try to follow my breathing, okay? I know it's hard, just try to focus on the rise and fall of my chest. I’ve got you."
He starts taking exaggerated deep breaths and whispering encouragement. The way he was sucking in air would have made you laugh if you weren’t on the verge of passing out.
After a moment, you're able to follow his breathing and it slowly calms you down. As your lungs stop aching so much, you can more clearly feel the pain in your head, pulsing at your temples.
Bucky notices as you screw your eyes shut, grimacing at your pain. He starts rubbing your arm and gently pulling you closer.
"Put your head on my chest, catch your breath."
Your feigned reluctance to his affection having quickly drained away, you let yourself lean over and he starts softly running his fingers along your hairline.
"Close your eyes, get some rest."
Your anxiety starts to spark again and you squirm a bit. "But you have that thing with Sam, and-" He cuts you off, stilling you and putting your worries to bed.
"Shhh none of that, just rest. Steve can handle it. I've got time."
You hid your face in his chest as your eyes glassed over, slightly annoyed at how much you depended on him, how safe he made you feel.
But you pushed the feeling away and let yourself drown in his comfort.
Tumblr media
A.N: as always, please let me know if I left out any warnings <33
471 notes · View notes
kinanabinks · 2 years
Text
relax
Tumblr media
18+
when everything gets too much, you can rely on bucky to calm you down.
content warning: nerd!frat!bucky x reader, fluff, mention of panic attacks/anxiety, brief mention of masturbation, soft!bucky is timid and cute and if anyone hurts him i will kill them, subtle implication of m*necraft.
Tumblr media
You burst into the bedroom, leaving behind the booming party and instead entering Bucky's peaceful safe haven. He looks over his shoulder from where he's sitting, pulling down his headset with a frown.
"Y/N?" He's confused to see you, assuming you'd be partying with his roommates and the rest of campus.
"Hi," You breathe out, closing the door and leaning back against it. "I'm sorry, but is it okay if I just chill in here with you for a bit?"
"Uh, sure," Bucky answers, still taken aback. He keeps his eyes on you as you trek over to sit on the chair next to him. "Do- do you wanna play?"
"No, that's okay. I just wanna watch," You reply with a small smile.
He hesitantly returns to his game, side-eyeing you every few seconds with slight bewilderment. The sound of his thumbs hitting the buttons of his controller relaxes you, giving you something to ground yourself with. You sit back, looking up at the ceiling, doing your best to take slow, long breaths.
"Are- are you having a panic attack?" Bucky asks you timidly, to which you laugh softly.
"No; just doing some deep breathing," You inform him. "I'm fine, really."
He nods slowly, turning back to his game. Slowly, you sit up and budge closer before resting your head on his arm.
"Is this okay?" You ask him lowly.
"Y- yeah, of course," He replies genuinely, feeling his heart flutter. After a few moments, he lifts up his arm and mumbles, "Here," before instead wrapping it around your shoulder, allowing you to move closer to him and rest your head against his chest. The action makes his stomach flip, and he wonders where he plucked up the courage to do it.
"What do you have to do?" You ask him with a mumble.
It takes him a few seconds to realize you're talking about the game. "Uh, I'm playing this pirate, outlaw guy, and I'm tracking down my stolen booty," He informs you. "The game kinda sucks, but now I've started it, so I have to complete it. The graphics aren't bad though, and most of the side missions are fun."
You watch on with keen interest as he plays, smiling when you catch a glimpse at the character. "Did you customize him?"
Bucky snorts. "Yeah, take a look," He says before turning the camera to show you his character - and the resemblance is uncanny.
"Oh, my God, he looks exactly like you!" You exclaim between laughs. "But, not as handsome."
His cheeks tinge pink and he's glad his room is dark. "Well, video game technology hasn't yet advanced enough to be able to recreate such beauty," He says sarcastically. "One day, though."
"One day," You repeat through a grin.
Bucky pulls out his headset from the controller which causes the sound of the game to play out loud. He lowers the volume, the game's background music combined with the occasional fight sounds being oddly calming to you. You look down at his hands, watching as his fingers expertly dance on the controller, his veins and tendons popping through every so often. His metal hand steals your attention, and you stare at it in awe.
"I had to retrain it when I first got it," He recounts, somehow able to tell that you were thinking about it. "Thought I'd never be able to play again, but it actually works better than my real hand, now."
"Does ink show up on the metal?" You ask him curiously. "If you draw on it?"
"Mhm," He replies absentmindedly as a particularly intense battle begins in the game.
Reaching out to the desk, you pick up a dark purple Sharpie from his pen holder and pull off the lid. Instead of drawing on his hand which would distract him from the game, you opt to draw a little further up. Bucky feels the sensation but is too engrossed to pay any real attention to it.
"Come on, you fucker," He mutters lowly, leaning forward. His arm wraps tighter around you as the fight intensifies, until you're practically forced to lay against him. You aren't complaining, though.
Once he wins the battle, he lets out a sigh of relief before relaxing. Looking down at you, he realizes what you did and leans closer to get a good look.
"Cute fish," He comments with a smile. "What's his name?"
"Uhh..." You give it a few more details, including some air bubbles. "Bucky."
"Very original," He teases you. "How'd ya come up with that one?"
"Shut it," You mumble with a laugh, pushing against his chest. "It's little Bucky Junior."
"Aw," Bucky coos, looking down at it proudly. "Look at that; he's got my eyes."
"My scales, though," You add, drawing tiny love hearts around it.
"You're his mom?" He asks with a raised brow.
"I am the one who made him," You say dramatically. "I practically birthed him!"
"Alright, alright," He says with a chuckle, looking back down at the fish. "Sorry about that, Bucky Junior; mommy can get a little testy."
"Don't turn little BJ against his mother!" You gasp, nudging him.
"BJ?" Bucky repeats incredulously. "You nicknamed our child blowjob?"
"What you choose to connote with his nickname is down to you," You state curtly, taking his metal hand off the controller to give yourself better access to it as you begin to doodle on it.
"Do you mind? My body is not your canvas," He says, though he can't hide the wide smile on his face.
"Yes, it is," You retort, glancing up at the paused game. "You didn't have to stop playing."
"Well, my strong hand is currently occupied elsewhere," He says pointedly.
Frowning, you tilt your head. "Is it true that guys use their dominant hand to jerk off?" You ask, the shots from earlier releasing you of your inhibitions.
"Uh, it depends on the guy, I guess," Bucky answers you with a shrug.
"Which one do you use?" You ask him without even realizing what you're saying.
An awkward look overtakes his face as he glances down at his metal hand which is currently being held by yours. "Uh..."
"Gross!" You cry, dropping his hand.
"I clean it!" He swears, holding his flesh hand up in surrender.
"Doesn't it hurt?" You wonder, picking it back up again and going back to doodling.
"I thought it would, but I was pleasantly surprised," Bucky says, so past the point of shock at the fact that he's discussing his masturbation habits with Steve's pretty friend that all he can do is go with it. "Doesn't hurt at all."
"That's good," You mutter, drawing a cat. "I'm glad to hear that."
"You are?" He asks you with a raised brow.
"Of course!" You claim. "Your satisfaction means a lot to me, Bucky."
"Shut it, you weirdo," He says between chuckles, nudging you with his shoulder. "How come you ditched the party?"
You let out a loud, dramatic sigh, closing the Sharpie and tossing it back onto the desk. "It just got a little... too much," You explain as best you can. "When there's so many people being so loud and excited, it just gets overwhelming."
"I completely understand that," He tells you truthfully. "Which is why I spend my night in here playing shitty video games, instead."
"Yeah, I see the appeal," You say. "Might have to join you in here more often."
"Be my guest," Bucky offers warmly. "It'd be nice for little BJ to see more of his ma, too."
"Are you calling me an absent parent?" You scoff, placing your hand on your chest.
He winces, shrugging. "Well, I definitely ain't calling you a present parent."
Shaking your head, you look up at him with a glare. "As my baby daddy, you should respect me a lot more."
His metal hand moves to rest on your hip, making you shiver. "I'm sorry," He says with a pout. "Forgive me?"
You let out a sigh. "How could I refuse the face that even video game technology couldn't replicate?"
Bucky laughs heartily at that, and his grip on your waist tightens as he pulls you closer, making your stomach flip. Why are you so nervous? It's only Bucky.
Glancing down at his hand to see your newer doodles, he snorts when he reads, 'I jerk off with this hand and it doesn't hurt,' written on his wrist and palm.
"Thank you for that," He says dryly. "That's exactly the kind of thing that'll stop people being scared of it."
You laugh at his words before your face drops and you frown. "People are scared of it?"
Bucky raises a brow. "You haven't heard anyone say that?"
"Well, my only friends are your best friends," You point out, glancing back at his bedroom door. "And something tells me they aren't scared of you."
"They're not, unfortunately," He says with a chuckle. "But, yeah. Maybe scared is giving myself too much credit, but they're definitely weirded out by it."
"Oh," You utter simply, before linking your fingers with his cold, metal ones. "Well, they're missing out on the best canvas I've ever used."
"They don't deserve it," He mumbles, resting his head on yours. "They don't deserve to know little BJ."
"Right? Our BJ was born of love and beauty," You say, tracing over the little fish. "I gave you BJ despite how hard it was."
He grins, shaking his head. "So stupid," He murmurs between laughs.
You can't help but laugh along, looking up at him with a wide smile. Having not realized how close you were too each other, you're a little taken aback by the proximity of his face to yours. Of his lips to yours. His eyes are wide and glued to yours as he feels your breath on his chin, making him shiver. For a few seconds, you both forget that the outside world exists.
Pulling yourself out of it, you sit up straight and look ahead. "Do you have any two-player games?" You ask him casually.
Bucky clears his throat before pulling out another controller. "Do I?" He replies pointedly. "You bet your ass."
You take the controller from him and watch as he turns it on and signs in for you.
"What do you wanna do?" He asks, scrolling through his vast library of games. "Beat me up? Build a house? Race me?"
"I wanna beat you up," You answer him bluntly. "Because I'd never be able to in real life, but I've got a good chance in a game."
Narrowing his eyes, he smirks. "I wouldn't be too sure about that, baby," He mutters without even realizing what he's saying.
The nickname makes your heart race but you do well to recover, keeping your eyes on the screen. "We'll see, Bucky Senior," You reply lowly, subtly moving back to where you were before with one of your shoulders resting against his chest.
You grin as he shows you secret moves and special combinations, his eyes lighting up when you get the hang of it quickly. "That's my girl!" He exclaims proudly, grinning. "Beat the fuck out of me- just like that. Have you played this before?"
Once you're done beating him up, he puts it on a calmer game, the two of you working together to build Bucky Junior a home. The music drowns out the noise from the party, and once again, it's just the two of you that exist in the world.
You smile to yourself as he explains the difference types of stones and bricks to you, his low voice making you feel safe and grounded. Though you've never really spent any time with Bucky before tonight, you find yourself getting along with him as though you've known him your while life. God, are you glad you came into his room tonight.
Bucky feels himself relax with the weight of you against him. Leaning his head on yours, he lets out a content sigh. He's never had the balls to talk to you before, as most of Steve's friends don't give Bucky the time of day and aren't the type of people he'd wanna be friends with anyway, but you just showed up and completely took him by surprise. God, he's glad you came into his room tonight.
part two >
Tumblr media
bucky masterlist
i don't have a taglist, follow my side blog for update notifications: @kinanabinksupdates
buy me a kofi <3
4K notes · View notes
jamie-leah · 9 months
Text
Text You
Bucky x Reader 
Oneshot 
Summary: You like texting Bucky in the middle of the night, slowly getting to know him and slowly falling in love. 
Word Count: 2989
Warnings: Mentions of violence and blood. Not edited. 
A/N: Here’s a little something I put together. Please ignore the time shown in the text pictures, I do not possess the skills to change it. All interaction is very much appreciated <3 
Masterlist 
Bucky was still adjusting to life now that things had gone back to normal. Or as normal as they could be.
He had taken his time getting back to normal. Only recently moving into his own place and taking on a few missions.
You had taken an immediate liking to Bucky; it was plain to see by everyone. You were the sunshine to Bucky’s rain, and you always took it upon yourself to make him feel included and welcomed. You wanted him to feel part of the team, part of the family.
So, when you had gotten his number after months and months of nagging, you knew it was game over for him.
The first time you text Bucky he frowned into the darkness. His phone lightly buzzing on his nightstand. He rolls over to see the alarm clock blinking the numbers 1.58. His frown creases to worry as he picks up the phone, swiping to unlock the message that he can now see is from you.
Tumblr media
Bucky does nothing but sigh throughout the whole exchange. All he wants is to be left alone. But before his last message he reads over the exchange. A seed of guilt starting to blossom in his chest, making it tighter. After reading it over and over and arguing with himself in the dark, he adds the cat comment.
The next day Bucky is making coffee, eyes still blurry from sleep, when a knock echoes through the apartment. He wanders over to the door, not bothering to check who it is when he yanks it open, scowl at the ready.
You stand there, smile beaming already which falters when your eyes travel down the expanse of exposed flesh, all ripples, scars and muscles. But you recover quickly when the white ball of fluff starts to wriggle in your arms.
Bucky rubs at his eyes three times to make sure he’s seeing what is right in front of him. You with eyes bright and the cheekiest smile he’s seen from you yet, holding a young white cat in your arms.
“I saw this little guy in a shelter, and he looked lonely. I thought you two would get on amazingly.” You state.
Bucky can feel his jaw unhinge but can’t do anything to stop it. A few sputtered words slip out until he remembers your phone conversation, the only time he mentioned liking cats.
Bucky starts to shake his head, which you diligently ignore, “his name is Alpine, he’s two, and adorable.”
“I don’t think-“
“So, you’ll have to pick up some food for him, but I can always do that if you just want to spend time with the little guy.”
Bucky continues the head shaking, “this is a terrible-“
You thrust Alpine into Bucky’s arms effectively cutting him off as he automatically cradles the white ball of fluff to his chest.
You give a wave to them both, “have fun guys, I’ll text you later!”
Bucky looks down as Alpine meows in his arms.
  He expects the pings now, they don’t worry him like they used to. Having his phone go off in the middle of the night was the norm now. And though Bucky would never admit it to anyone, he was grateful sometimes for the distraction on the nights he couldn’t sleep.
When he sees your first message, he isn’t surprised of the topic. Halloween is tomorrow after all, and you had been talking about what outfit to wear for ages.
Tumblr media
It was true, Bucky could never sleep past five, even though he wished he could. Of course, he shouldn’t have been surprised when there was a knock on the door just after five in the morning.
Bucky makes his way to the door, Alpine trotting in front. When he opens the door, you’re standing there with two cups of coffee to go, and a dozen bags.
You look down at Alpine weaving between your legs and smile, “Hi Alpine, how’re you loving your new home?”
Bucky watched you. He wondered why you were trying so hard, why you wanted to be around him so much. He wondered why you were putting in so much effort for someone like him. He was also wondering when you got so beautiful with a smile that bright.
You hand him one of the coffee cups, “black with three sugars, I remembered and no it’s not poisoned.”
You grab a few bags and pass them to Bucky and his spare hand, “help with these and I’ll get the rest.”
Bucky complies as you push him into his apartment, “uh, what is all this?”
You shrug, “just a few decorations for tonight.”
Bucky’s features screw up, “decorations?”
You start looking through the bags, “yeah, for Halloween.”
“I don’t- Wait, tonight? What’s happening tonight?” Trepidation clear in his voice.
You shrug again, “just a get together.”
“I swear to god, if you’ve organised a party-“
You wave at him to stop, “its not a party. It was my turn to organise the Halloween party and much to Tony’s dismay, I said it was just going to be us guys.”
Bucky eyes you with suspicion, “and why are you doing it in my apartment?”
You roll your eyes like it’s obvious, “because if I had done it at mine or anyone else’s you would not have shown up.”
Bucky sighs. He looks down at Alpine rubbing against his leg. He can’t dispute what you said, it is exactly what he would have done.
Bucky gives in. Something he is doing more and more with you lately. He’s not sure if its your persistence or your smile. He’s not sure he cares.
By the time you both finish, the apartment is transformed. Cobwebs are hanging from the ceiling, pumpkins are flickering on every ledge, a witch’s cauldron is the bowl for the punch.
With two bags left, Bucky wasn’t sure what there was left to decorate. You hand him one bag, “this is your outfit.”
Bucky peeks inside, “no.”
You start to speak but Bucky cuts you off, “I said no. I don’t even know where you got this from.”
“It’s the original. It’s yours.”
Bucky looks away from the bag, “doesn’t matter. I’m still not wearing it.”
“Look, I’m not going to force you to do anything you don’t want to do. There’s a generic costume underneath that one in the bag. I just wanted you to feel like the man we all see you as.”
You leave him to it, retreating to the bathroom with your own bag to get changed. Bucky heads to his bedroom. Closing the door and staring at himself in the mirror on the back of the door.
Bucky thinks over your words ‘the man we all see you as’. What do they all see him as? Who do you see him as? Secretly, Bucky was burning to know how you saw him, both afraid and hopeful that maybe you see him as someone worth it. Because Bucky wasn’t going to dress up for Halloween, he thought he was already monster enough.
He got the outfit out and laid it across his bed, leaving the alternative you spoke about without even looking at it. He stares at the outfit in front of him for ages, until his door starts knocking and he can hear you talking to the team.
He hears the music flood his apartment by the time he decides what to wear. Everyone is chatting away when he makes his way down the hallway, heart straining against his ribcage. The talking stops when he finally steps into the room.
Bucky looks for familiar eyes, landing on Steve smiling at him already, “hey! You decided to wear it. I always wanted to wear the uniform with you back then.”
That’s when he realises Steve has the same army uniform. He breathes a little easier knowing he doesn’t stick out as much.
He finds your eyes next. The light behind them the brightest he’s ever seen, “I can see why you were so popular with the ladies.”
The wink makes him cough and look away. When he looks back to you, he frowns, “where is your outfit?”
You flash him a knowing smile as you pull a white sheet on, “a spooky ghost!”
Bucky chuckles as he remembers your questions about ghosts last night. And it was the first time he truly felt grateful to you for pushing him out of his comfort zone. It turned out to be one of the best nights of his life. The laughing, the dancing and you, all in one evening.
  Bucky watches the ceiling light up as his phone buzzes on the side table next to him. He picks it up fully expecting your words to greet him.
Tumblr media
Of course, Bucky eventually gives into you. He always does. He replies with his favourite flavour much later though and doesn’t hear from you until you appear at his door at lunchtime.
“Get your jacket, we have a little mission to complete.”
Bucky doesn’t hesitate, grabbing his leather jacket and following you out of his apartment building, “what’s the assignment?”
You gesture to a building a ways up, “there’s a meeting taking place at a dessert parlour. There was some intelligence to suggest that one of them was an old Hydra agent.”
Bucky nods his understanding. It takes another few minutes to reach the building. You walk straight in and settle in a booth in the corner. Bucky takes the seat opposite you, discretely checking the place out.
When the waitress comes over, Bucky almost tells her to go away but you beat him to it, “we’ll take a mint choc sundae to share please.”
Bucky gives you a look once the waitress leaves and you just shrug, “we have to make it look like we’re here for the dessert and not to spy on people.”
Bucky concedes your point but never lets his guard down. His eyes always travelling to the door when the bell dings at the arrival of someone new.
When the ice cream arrives, you try to hand him a spoon, but he refuses. You slide the spoon across to him, “relax Bucky and eat the ice cream with me.”
“Relax? We’re on a mission, I can’t relax.”
You scrap your spoon across the top of the ice cream, “we’re not on a mission Buck.”
He looks at you sharply, “what?”
You speak around the freezing goodness, “I made it up.”
Bucky turns to face you fully, “you did what? What would you do that for?!”
You give him ‘that’ look, “because I wanted to eat some ice cream with you, and I knew you never would have come with me if I had asked.”
Bucky’s mouth opens and closes like a goldfish for a few seconds. He finally snaps it shut, picking up the spoon and stabbing the ice cream with it, mumbling under his breath the entire time.
Bucky eventually comes to the realisation that he should never doubt you. You both have so much fun that you order another two sundaes to share.
 It’s the same old story. Bucky is staring into the void when the darkness lights up as a text from you awaits to greet him.
Bucky turns to grab it and swipes to read your message.
Tumblr media
Bucky shoots out of bed grabbing his clothes while trying to ring you. It rings out and he curses. He runs into the hallway and throws his boots on, calling Steve.
Steve picks up after three long rings, “hello? Buck?”
“Steve, Steve listen to me, where was that mission taking place tonight?”
“Mission?” Steve mumbles.
“The one that Y/N was on, is on right now!”
“It was just some stake out job, in some industrial building-“
Bucky starts running to the outskirts of town, “no, Steve, listen to me! I need an exact address and I need it now.”
Steve becomes more alert, “I’ll text you the address now.”
When the text comes through Bucky takes off, people, cars and lights blurring together. His only thought is you, getting to you in time. He has to get to you in time.
Another text comes through, the buzzing in his hand like an electric shock. He looks down to see a text from Steve again, pinging your location to Bucky.
When Bucky gets to the building everything is quiet. There doesn’t seem to be anyone around, but he draws his gun just in case and while he doesn’t want to give his position away if there are people there, you’re more important.
“Y/N?” Bucky shouts into the building, his voice echoing through the empty space.
He calls again and strains to listen. There. He hears your groan. If it weren’t for his enhanced abilities, he probably would have missed it.
He finds you squeezed into a corner, obviously hiding from whoever did this to you. Blood is running like a river from your wound, your hand placed over it but no pressure being applied.
He falls to his knees, grabbing your face, “hey, hey! Open your eyes for me sweetheart, I need to know you’re still awake.”
You groan but your eyes seem glued shut. Bucky pushes your hand away, bringing pressure to your wound.
Your eyes spring open, a scream tearing from your throat. Inky blackness hovering on the edges of your vision but you make him out, you see Bucky like the king of hell with your vision darkening and his hair in disarray.
“Bucky.”
His eyes meet yours, “yes, keep your eyes open for me. I’m here, I’m gonna take care of you.”
Bucky takes one hand away to grab his phone. It slips out of his hand a couple times, blood smearing the keyboard. Bucky finally gets the keypad up and dials Steve.
Your eyes droop, blood roaring in your ears. You can just make out Bucky’s lips moving but not sure what he’s saying. You let your eyes shut again.
“NO! You have to stay with me, stay awake. Help is coming and you’re going to be fine, you’ll be fine.”
Your eyes won’t comply, the darkness too warm to leave but you smile at hearing Bucky’s voice. “I’m really glad you’re here.” You manage to cough the words out.
Bucky pushes harder on your wound, but it only elicits a groan between your wheezing breaths, “I always answer your texts, don’t I?”
“If it had to be anyone, I’m glad its you.”
Bucky wasn’t sure you were making sense, but he was just grateful that you were still here with him, talking.
“So, when are you taking me out on another ice cream date?” Bucky asks.
You don’t answer. It was one of the only moments in Bucky’s long life that he was truly afraid. He pushes harder, blood still pouring through the gaps in his fingers. But no groan or protest makes it passed the lips he’s wanted to kiss for a while now.
Bucky keeps saying your name repeatedly. He continues to say it even when the others arrive with help. No matter how loud or soft or panicked he says your name, your eyes never do open again.
  Bucky is staring at the ceiling, counting the tiles like one would count sheep to fall asleep. He hadn’t left the hospital since you arrived. He had been sleeping in the chair for days now or trying to at least.
The nurses took pity on him and guided him to an empty room with a hospital bed. They had insisted and Bucky wanted to show his gratitude, so he had accepted.
He knew he would never be able to sleep though. His whole body ached but it was coiled like a spring, just waiting for your eyes to open again. He found himself waiting for his phone to beep at him with a text from you in the middle of the night. But his phone was eerily silent every night.
He couldn’t remember the last time he missed someone so much. His eyes eventually close, your bright eyes and mega watt smile haunting him in his dreams.
*Buzzz* *Buzzz*
Bucky groans. His hand snakes out to swipe his phone from the table next to him. His eyes watering at the brightness of the screen in front of him.
Tumblr media
Bucky falls out of the hospital bed. The hard floor leaves him breathless for a moment, the phone clattering away from him. He leaves it there, his feet already hitting the plastic tiles. Bucky weaves through the patients and staff until he bursts through the door leading to your room.
He sees you, your eyes tired but alive, your phone lighting up your pale face as you look up. Bucky stares at the corners of your mouth turning up in a soft smile and he struggles to hold back the tears of relief that he hadn’t missed his chance to see that face light up again.
You put the phone down and open your arms out to him. Bucky falls into your embrace, and you let out an ‘oomph’ to which he softly apologises in your ear without letting you go.
You’re not sure how long you stay that way when you finally pull back, mouth open to make some lame joke. Bucky stops those plans when he brings his lips to yours in a bruising kiss. His lips desperate to feel you.
When the kiss breaks, you smile, “I hadn’t even said yes to that second date yet.”
Bucky brings his lips back to yours, gentle this time, like they knew yours was made for his and he knew you weren’t going anywhere. His teeth grazing your plump bottom lip just as he pulls back.
Your eyes stay closed a few seconds longer as you breathe out, “yes”. Yes, to the second date, yes to Bucky, yes to a future with both of you in it.
277 notes · View notes
buckyysdoll · 2 months
Text
okay; part 1/2
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
MAIN MASTERLIST
જ⁀➴ written, re-edited & posted again for an old request from @hi-my-name-is-riley !! i’m sorry for all the confusion & i hope this is still alright for u !! i’ve never really felt fully happy with this, but :// !! sending love! Xx
summary: when you find out you didn’t pass a test that was crucial for your career, bucky’s there to comfort you through it — ps. we’re proud of u anyway, you’ve got this xox
Tumblr media
A laugh track cut through the television set, though the dialogue was cheap and unfunny. It was a sitcom — and one mediocre at best — though you made no move to reach and change the channel.
At least it was some background noise to fill the stagnant silence. It was almost enough to have nearly even drowned out your thoughts —
Almost, but not quite.
An hour had passed just like this: you lying on your couch in a mental stasis. Your eyes burned from crying, and your neglected cup of tea cooled on the coffee table, brimming full and undrunk.
Words were making rounds in your head on repeat. The message was clear, and abhorrent: the one thing you wanted beyond anything else had been lost.
You were utterly lost.
By now, it had been sixty one minutes since you'd gotten the phone call that had tilted the axis of your life. We’re sorry to tell you, but unfortunately …
Five weeks of feeling victory, then this. All for what? You couldn’t believe it, but what choice did you have?
This was your life's work, and so the breaking of your heart was fully earned. Was justified and all you could feel. Weeks and months and years you'd devoted to this, and what now? What was there now?
When you'd first heard, you'd hated yourself for that failing, for what you saw as personal failure. Though now that was sixty one minutes ago and between then and here you'd been numbed, face swollen from crying the tears what would not stop coming in their quick, hot tracks.
And so: there was just that television, its white noise and open screen. That obnoxious fake laughter you hated. Your blank eyes that could still only watch, do nothing but, and your aggravated cheeks mottled red and sorrow-stained.
Not even the sound of your husband's footfalls on the hall outside could rouse you. You could've known the pitch of it anywhere and yet there was no comfort in hearing it now. His key turned in the door, a familiar domestic sound, and the latch clicked out of place. In your periphery, the door swung wide and a well-loved frame filled the space it had left.
Not even to him could you bear to look. You couldn't bring yourself to turn your head.
"Hey honey, I'm sorry l'm late. Traffic was a nightmare." Once, you would've marvelled at those words coming from his mouth — how mundane, how effortlessly close and familiar they were, such that it spoke of an easy, intimate rhythm that could only come from two people sharing a home, and a life together. What you used to think you'd never have.
Because indeed, if someone had told you five years ago that you'd live in this apartment, be with him? Surely then you would've laughed, would've wept, but in this moment nothing could've felt like a blessing.
The only response you made was a low, noncommittal sound saying okay. Confirming that you’d heard him.
And that was all Bucky Barnes needed to hear to know that something was irrecoverably wrong.
He knew all your tells even better than his own: what you said even when you were silent just by a singular look on your face. What all your hmms and little sounds and gestures meant. Each expression you wore, and when. And so he knew now in his bones that something wasn’t right.
It took seconds. His stomach clenched up.
The TV screen lit up your face in a low, sickly wash. In a pallor. You were pale, too pale. Motion caught and held in your eyes in great, glassy arcs of colour from the screen. A box of tissues sat surrounded by ones that you'd used and discarded. Your full cup of tea no longer steamed.
Proof enough of how long you'd been there. How long you’d needed him before he’d arrived. Bucky's heart seized and worry gripped him as you sniffed once aloud, confessing that — yes, you’d been crying.
Bucky moved to the couch as by instinct, his love for you driving each step through the panic.
And oh, there was so much panic, thick and greasy and abhorrent in his gut, as he came to your side in measured steps, keys and groceries and it’s Tuesday flowers forgotten on the counter.
There were hard days with you two just as much as the good, because of both you and him. Your pasts weren’t easy, and though that was for far different reasons, you worked for the future you wanted together.
And so he knew this silence, even if he didn’t yet know its cause. He knew that you’d need to be held. He'd promised to love you through everything and oh, how he did. He did, and he would. Always.
At the couch, Bucky lifted your blanketed legs so gently that it re-broke your heart, and sat down where they'd been with your feet in his lap. "Honey?" His hands settled on them, caution plain in each movement and his voice so soft that it hurt, that it brought a fresh lump to your throat.
More tears brimmed and fell.
But at last your eyes left the TV screen and found their familiar way to his own. The look in them ripped you wider, wide open. There was such tenderness, such worry. Such love. A fresh sob broke its cresting wave in your chest, and you were crying even harder than before.
Bucky shifted closer, and carded his fingers through your hair, once, twice; over and again, in long soothing strokes, with his eyes never leaving your face. “Do you want to tell me about it?” You said nothing, couldn't speak, and just managed to turn your head to his palm. Kiss it once.
It said enough: that you needed his nearness, the comfort of his warmth that had always steadied you for as long as you’d had the familiar privilege of knowing it. You knew if he could, he would have died just trying to make you feel okay, but for now he waited until you found the words that only you could find in yourself.
"You know that test I took?" Your voice was thick, slightly hoarse with disuse. “Turns out I didn't pass.” And there it was, out now, out in the open where comfort and Bucky could reach. Resignation weighed you down but your lips made a small, pitiful smile at yourself. It felt like confession and you had all its shame in admitting to your boyfriend what you’d feared had come true.
But still, as your words hung in the air, there was his strong hand in your hair; those worried eyes sea-blue and as deep, and looking only at you. You almost saw the words land.
"[Y/n]” That look — him feeling everything you felt: all your hopes dying, your grief. Bucky would’ve shouldered your pain alone if he could, but you both knew he couldn’t; so he offered himself, all you needed, his unwavering steadfast strength by your side.
It was you two against the whole world and if one of you suffered, you both did.
Bucky stood and moved up onto the couch, manoeuvring and settling behind you so you lay as close as you physically could in the limited space. Not wanting to meet his eyes and see the blatant love there, you kept your body turned to the room. If you looked at him now, you wouldn’t feel like you’d failed just yourself, but Bucky too.
And you couldn’t bear it.
A strong arm came around your waist and you were warm and flush against him, Bucky gentle, just so gentle, with each slow move that he made. You were safe, you were here, and he was grateful to the point of physical nausea, almost; when he first came in, he’d thought …
God, he’d feared the worst. His past was a ghost that so loved the man it haunted, and he’d just feared the worst.
Now then, he took in your scent, the familiar comfort of holding you and having the weight of you in his arms, and made a silent promise in a kiss to the crown of your head that you would get through this together. Your hurting was a horror that floored him, but this was something that you could — and would — get through. You were safe, you were here, you were safe safe safe. One breath in, out again. Safe.
"Can you talk about it with me? When did you find out?” With the words, Bucky’s hand made slow strokes idly up and down your waist, moving to your stomach and settling there to warm your chilled bare skin beneath your sweater.
“‘Got a call just over an hour ago." An hour of feeling like this. An hour where he should’ve been there been there been there —
Bucky shut out the thought. Humming low in acknowledgment, he rested his head on the curve of your shoulder from behind, dipping enough to press his lips to the crevice that still smelt of your perfume. “I'm so sorry, doll.” The sincerity was plain in his voice. The sorrow. The ache.
You huffed out a hopeless breath and closed your hand over his, twining your fingers through his own. Several moments passed before either of you spoke again. When he did, his words were crushing only because you wished so much they were true.
“But this isn't a reflection on you." And there it was, just like that: a trembling hope. A frail optimism with which you could hold it. The conviction in his voice was so quiet but so certain, so sure, that you almost believed him. Almost, but not quite.
"Yes, you're remarkable. You're absolutely incredible. And I’m more proud of you than anything in this whole world. You know that, right?” Light blooming in you then, just a little, just enough. Coming up through the dark cracks. “But you're still only human, doll. One slip up doesn't make you a failure.”
You wanted to believe him. You did. But there was just … there were so many buts. It wasn’t as easy as that, to just move on from every single hope that had died. A sigh blew from between your pursed lips; “Thank you, but I just ...” At least your tears had stopped.
Bucky's presence, it seemed, just soothed you in a way that was almost instinctive.
You toyed with his fingers that still curled around your own upon your stomach, giving a small squeeze that Bucky knew meant I appreciate you. And hearing your silent words just like always, he replied in a whisper against your skin: “I know.” Your boyfriend pressed another small kiss to your shoulder.
And it was everything, that little gesture. The understanding you weren’t quite sure you deserved. He was truly your world, and what was more? He helped you see his whole world in yourself. Knowing him had made you question everything you'd once thought, and then in growing to love him? You’d learned to see yourself the way that he did: as beautiful, incredible. As capable, too.
Capable intrinsically, without condition. With just as much worth as you came into the world with. With a worth that was yours, and that no one and nothing could ever take from you. Not even yourself.
You turned in the circle of his arm. Affection rushed you as your eyes met again for the first time in far too long, and there he was — your Buck, your Bucky. Never your “James”, but always your love. Your sweetheart. The best friend that you’d ever had and who’d devoted his life to precisely this: to loving you, and lending the strength to you when your own faltered and you needed his.
Bracing a curled hand on his t-shirted chest just to feel him, you let yourself give into it: his reassurance, his steadfast faith in you wholly irrespective of what you’d ever done or not done; in the warmth of his body, his familiar smell of cologne and something musky and just so Bucky; into the eyes you adored and that watched you as you watched him, as you took all of him in.
His own hand came up to your face, a tender touch; one you coveted and exhaled against. It was a cradle like you were something cherished, and you were. It was a warm weight on your skin that was grounding and reminded you of just where, what, who you were.
Again, Bucky's fingers threading into your soft hair; where they stayed, braced with his thumb at your cheek to brush slow, smoothing strokes on your skin. And it worked: calmed your breath and gradually lightened your sore sorry heart, back and forth as though to ease, which it did.
“I'm so proud of you, doll.” Bucky’s smile alone could've outglowed the sun, and it was quiet in holding that pride; enough for you both when you fell short of loving yourself with the same ferocity with which he loved you. And you saw it in the glassy shine to his own eyes, rendered deeper in their blue with adoration; searching your face, so familiar and loved, as though to memorise it, as though he hadn’t already a hundred times and more.
It was never enough.
“There is nothing, nothing,” he reiterated with his thumb dipping lower to your lip, where he lightly brushed it before going on: “that you could ever do to change that. And you deserve to be so proud of yourself, even if you can’t see that right now.”
As he spoke, his touch the only thing that ever could ground you, you held tight to his wrist, ran your fingers lightly up his clothed arm to his muscle-packed shoulder. Absent, steadying touches. Anything to remind yourself that he was here, and loving you. That no matter what happened you had him, you’d always have Bucky. Just as he had you, too.
And now you couldn't help but take his words in faith. "Just look at how far you've come to even get here in the first place. Did you ever think you could, before you did?"
You shook your head no, but stayed quiet. His words were coming through, hope and strength were coming through, and so you let them. Let yourself truly hear him.
"Honey, this is just one step in a whole lifetime's worth of achievements. You tried your best, and you can't ask anymore from yourself than that. It didn't quite work out this time, but your future — the chance to try again — will still be there when you're ready to take it. It's not going anywhere, doll.”
And he was right. He was right like he usually was, so rational when he knew that you just needed space first to feel it, before you dealt with it. In times like these when he offered his perspective, you realised just how much you'd lost yours — how much you needed the space he gave you to grieve for the loss, for the failure; how it deserved to breathe on its own, and just how crucial it was that you felt it. Crying and breaking in his arms was essential to the healing, to the growth. To acceptance.
It came out as a whisper.
"Thank you." And you really meant it. Really felt his faith in you raise something up in your own chest: self-forgiveness, or at least the hope of it. But for right now it was enough.
Even when what you saw as "failures" put just more obstacles in the way of life’s path. What more was this then, than just another hurdle to find your way over? Fighting tooth and nail as you always did. Though you may stumble blind you still moved, still forged onwards with the most loving man by your side.
Life would, after all, still be uncertain even if you had passed. There were no guarantees. You'd overcome everything else till this point, so why not let yourself move through this pain too?
“Thank you." It came out again, you couldn't stop it; your voice was stronger now, and more certain. You thought of how he held you, not just in his arms but how you trusted him to love you so gently; not just skin to skin, but the tenderness, too, that he reserved for you alone. Who would’ve thought — the famed ex-Winter Soldier, once the most widely feared, the most deadly assassin? Laying here holding you now with those hands that you trusted beyond your own life.
Who knew how long you stayed like that: measured breaths, the slow rising and falling. Bucky now on his back with your head on his chest, legs tangled in each other’s so warm and close — so much like just one being — that it was almost unknown exactly where two distinct bodies could be discerned. But it was there that you allowed yourself to let go of your pride, and be a person who could fall and get back up and call it life.
Perhaps you wouldn't ever feel good about the test: perhaps you'd always wish that it had gone different. But for now, in the soft, steady hold of your husband, with the smell of him, the feel of him, around you — you breathed deeply for the first time in hours and knew you’d be okay. Maybe not now, maybe not for a little while yet.
But you’d be okay.
38 notes · View notes
Text
Bad Night
Bucky x reader
Word count: drabble
A/N: Trying to write out a lot of little snippets like this that are easier to digest. trying to figure out taglists with shorter ones like these. Feedback appreciated :)
------
The door creaks open slowly. 
You hold your breath, stifling the sniffles and praying that he can’t hear your racing heart or see the trembling of your body. You were laid in bed, back to the doorway. A small amount of light from the hallway fills the previously dark room.
It’s silent for a few moments before you hear the door close, the room darkening again. It takes his eyes a few moments to adjust before he moves, soft footsteps coming over to the bed. He thinks you're asleep, and you’d like to keep it that way.
You hear the shuffling of him changing his clothes, trying to breathe slowly so he doesn’t hear how your tears have caused your nose to run. It’s getting harder so you try to sniffle quietly, hoping he doesn’t hear it.
He does, and the shuffling stops.
You hold your breath again, praying he doesn’t say anything. Because if he did you knew you would cry and you would not be able to stop. 
“Y/n?” he whispers. 
You clench your eyes closed, biting your lip.
“Y/n, are you okay?”
You let out a small whimper as silent sobs began to wrack your body. You turned to hide your face in the pillow.
“Hey, hey,” he says, circling around the bed and crouching down beside you, “What’s going on?”
Bucky’s hand comes up to brush some hair out of your face, hushing you softly and leaning in to kiss your forehead. 
“It’s okay, you’re okay. Whatever it is, it's gonna be okay. Just have a rough day?” he asks softly, brushing a tear away with his thumb. 
You open your mouth to speak but no words come out.
Bucky sighs, nodding a little to himself.
“That’s okay, we don’t have to talk about it. Do you want me to just hold you for a while?”
You nodded a little, and he pressed another feather light kiss to your forehead. “Ok, just give me one second.” He stood up and went back to his side of the bed, pulling the covers back and getting in behind you. You felt the bed dip as he laid down, moving closer to you before he wrapped his arms around you, pulling your back to meet his chest. He pressed a kiss to your shoulder and nuzzles his nose in your neck.
“I’m right here, y/n. I’ve got you. I’m not going anywhere.”
512 notes · View notes
buckyalpine · 1 year
Note
I love my Grumpy Bucky !! He’s secretly a softie , I know he is ! So I have another ask for him ! Bucky being a literal asshole to anyone and everyone !! Except his girl that he has heart eyes for . When he’s being flirted on he is borderline offended cause he very obviously has a girl and he’s not all that kind about turning girls down ! He’s ruthless when he’s training recruits , he’s an asshole to everyone . But his girl !? His sweet angel !? He is the softest human alive ! And Sam would tease him about it . One moment he’s longingly staring at you , tucking hair behind your ear and the next he’s staring daggers at Sam ! But then you hop on his lap and his back to being your sweet , soft boyfriend ! At home he’s laughing to something silly you’re doing , tackles you on the sofa and tells you how much he loves you ! He’s not shy of PDA either . Kisses too deep for people to be around , possessive hands . He just looks like a meanie when he’s out 😂
YES YES YES YES. Bucky's entire essence is being a complete teddy bear for you and you alone.
Honestly, imagine the new recruits are all whispering about getting to train with Sergeant Barnes.
"I heard he has a girlfrined through"
"Ugh"
"I know right?"
"How cares, we'll see how loyal he is when I'm grinding on his fat di-
"Oh my god, he's going to hear you!"
"Good, then he'll know what to expect"
Bucky heard it all and he's absolutely offended. He feels sick. How could anyone think they could replace his angel, fuck no. He's already stoic around everyone, but knowing the trainees are trying to get into his pants knowing he has a girl? He's ruthless.
First of all, he doesn't let them touch him. No. Ew. He calls over some of the senior trainees and directs them on what to do with the newbies, critiquing their form the entire time (not for no reason, but he's much less kind about it)
Imagine their faces when you walk into the gym and he just melts. He's such a puppy for you, his eyes are sparkling, hes grinning when you make your way over to him.
"Hi babygirl"
"Hi Sergeant"
Oh what that word does to him when it comes from your lips. He kisses you deeply, keeping his hands on you for longer than necessary. The girls are rolling their eyes and avoiding eye contact and honestly he doesn't care cause he's not doing it to show them shit. He's doing all this cause he's just that in love with you.
Sometimes, he gets lost in how adorable you look, just staring at you with heart eyes while you telling him about you day. He's playing with a piece of your hair, tucking it back and Sam is having a fucking field day with this. He can't believe what he's seeing, Bucky Barnes blushing and simping and so deep in love. Bucky's heart eyes disappear when he narrows his eyes at Sam, who is still snickering.
You don't even notice, you happily sit on his lap, still talking about your day and your little puppy is back, his nose is nuzzling your cheek, hes peppering kisses onto your face.
The team is watching a movie and he's making his way downstairs. All he sees is you. You grin when you see your boyfriend approaching, giving him grabby hands. He tackles you onto the sofa, kissing you all over, wrapping his arms around you, trapping you.
"Hi angel!"
"Hi baby bear" You giggle, your nose nuzzling with his.
The team doesn't know what to do with themselves, they don't understand what's happening.
"Did she just call him baby bear?"
"Yes"
"Am I high"
"Probably"
They get used to it eventually, but only parts of it. Bucky gives no fucks; he will pick you up and pluck you onto the counter, making out with you like a horny teenager, fucking 8 in the morning while Steve just wants to grab his coffee.
Possessive hands. All over. You're always in his lap, he's always touching you in some way. When he's really in a mood, he marks you, sometimes in places only you can see but when this one agent gets too close to you, he makes sure he marks you in a way no one will look at your twice.
But when he's back with you, wrapped in your warmth, you have your sweet teddy bear again and he'll never let you forget just how much he loves you.
4K notes · View notes
starchildbucky · 2 years
Text
bucky x gn!reader
Tumblr media
agent!reader coming back exhausted from a rough mission and bucky gently cleaning the blood left off of you
you’re sitting on the bathroom’s counter, your mind both loud and numb from everything that happened. bucky stands between your thighs, and it’s mostly quiet; he patiently waits for you to come back to him, only telling you in a low voice what he’s doing to ground you and ease you back into reality.
he’s wiping the blood on your hands with a warm wet towel, and finally he feels your fingers closing around his. he raises his head towards you; the eyes looking back at him are tired, vulnerable, but grateful.
“you’re okay, doll”, he whispers and you nod, barely, and slowly bring down your head to let it rest on his shoulder. he then brings one of your hands to his lips, pressing gentle kisses on your fingers and the back of your hand.
“you’re home. you’re okay”, his lips brush against your skin as he talks and your shoulders feel lighter, your mind less fuzzy. you feel his warmth next to you, on your skin, his scent and his voice surround you. yes, you’re home.
Tumblr media
330 notes · View notes
buckgasms · 2 years
Note
Hey Pom, I know you're chalk full of things right now but I had an idea, currently based off of my own situation. How would an over protective, almost Daddy Bear Bucky, react to a reader having chronic pain? Personally I have chronic migraines and chronic knee pain (in both knees) and I just wanna have someone take my pain seriously
Hello my sweet angel - I hope you are feeling ok? I hate chronic pain, it's a total bitch and it should go away. This would be so nice and I hope it makes you, and anyone else feeling a bit achy and fed up today, a bit warmer and fuzzier 😘
Tumblr media
You were in bed, propped up with pillows, surrounded by empty pill packets and your hot water bottle was no longer hot, just a lump of rubber that wasn't helping you at all.
You tried to relax, take deep breaths but the more you tried to shut out your pains they seemed to throb and glow within you. Little tears pricked your eyes and a few escaped and slipped down your cheek as you tried to find some comfort.
Just as you wiped your eyes, Bucky came into the bedroom with a mug of tea and a concerned look on his face.
"Oh babygirl" he said softly before coming to sit down on the bed next to you, placing the mug down and taking your face in his warm hands. "Daddy it won't go away" you mumbled and pressed your face into his palm as a few more tears slipped down your cheeks. He removed one hand and pulled off the heavy duvet revealing your beautiful, sore body to him.
"Tell me where it hurts Princess..." You pointed at your knees, so he moved his hand to very gently massage your aching joints. His touch gave you goosebumps and although it didn't stop the pain, it did help a little. He then leant down and kissed both your knees, squeezing at your thighs. "Where else sweetheart?" You let him help pull you forwards and you said your lower back was aching. He wrapped your arms around him, your face pressed into his neck and he pressed soft kisses to your hair and rubbed your back gently. You whined a little, a mix of ache and relief running through your body. "My head hurts too Daddy" you whispered and he used one hand to start stroking your scalp.
You clung to him, tears of happiness and relief flowing freely, kissing his neck and cheek as he soothed you the best he could. After sitting like this for a little while he pulled back a bit and kissed you fully. "I'm gonna go run you a bath Princess, so I want you to sit here, drink your tea and decide which bubbles you want. I'll be back in a moment." You smiled and kissed him before leaning back and taking the tea he passed you. You closed your eyes and sipped, your mind grateful for the very simple yet challenging task he had left you with.
He came back as promised and you put in your request for bubble baths and an extra bath bomb that you both agreed was required in this difficult time. He gently pulled you out of your pyjamas, whispering how he has the prettiest princess in the world.
You were pleased that he joined you in the bath, his strong body a much more comfortable seat in the warm water. His arms wrapped around you and you finally felt a bit of relief in your muscles. "I'm sorry you're hurting babygirl" he muttered in your ear, strong fingers squeezing gently as you leaned back on him. "Hate that I can't take it away, wanna beat someone up, makes me so mad..." You giggled and pressed a kiss to his cheek, which he extended by turning his face to give you another, breathtaking one. "This is better though" you whispered and pulled his arms to wrap tighter around you. You sat quietly for a while, just kissing and relaxing in his arms until you felt yourself getting tired. "Thank you Daddy Bear" you whisper before letting your eyes close, his lips leaving a little kiss on your nose.
328 notes · View notes
therapyandprozac · 1 year
Text
Bucky Helps You Get Revenge!
Hi guys!! This is just a drabble only 180 words🙈 mostly a self indulgent fic but I hope you enjoy it!!
WARNINGS: Guns, canon violence, murder of an abuser
Tumblr media
You saw ‘him’ on a mission, the one person you wanted to never see again was in front of you, and he didn't recognize you. You hoped it was because of the mask and not because he forgot what he did to you.
“Buck.” You say calmly into your com. Bucky turns around to see you're shaking with your gun drawn, in front of a begging man on his knees. He stands next to you, gun pointed at the man's head out of caution.
“What’s wrong?” He asks, not knowing who is at the end of his barrel.
“It’s him…Him.” You whisper. Bucky doesnt say anything just chuckles under his breath.
“I feel the responsible thing to say is getting revenge won’t fix your problem.” He pauses and you nod. “Or we make him unrecognizeable.”
“I prefer that option.” Half cocked smiles covering both of your faces as he begs and pleads for his life. You laugh before taking the first shot, square on his forehead. He falls backward, you and Bucky unload the rest of each of your clips into his corpse.
59 notes · View notes
peachbottom · 8 months
Text
Not Hungry
Tumblr media
Authors Note: I actually kind of hate this but I spent some time on it so I might as well post it. I wrote this with a similar body type to mine in mind, though it can be pictured anyway you like it does hint at a midsize/chubby reader. Give me feedback if you feel like it. Much love xoxo
Summary: You are self conscious eating in front of people so you decide to wait until you get home to eat. But unfortunate weather has you stuck at Buckys apartment and he is determined to make sure you don’t go to sleep hungry.
Warnings: food, not eating, body image, insecurities, hints at mature themes, pet names, possibly disordered eating habits, barely edited, bad formatting (pls let me know if I missed any)
——————————————————————————
You and Bucky had been together for a little while now, about 6 months. You both agreed to take it slow due to your own situations.
You really did like Bucky, loved him even, but you still had your habits and behaviors that you used to mask your own anxieties.
For example, you don’t eat in front of people. Even Bucky, and not because you don’t trust him but because you get in your head.
You will eat food with him but never a full meal. Part of it is because you don’t want him to judge you for eating too much, too little, too fast, too slow, anything really. People have always had something to say about your body and appearance and you came up with this coping as a way to keep them from having more to judge.
It started in high school when girls would make comments that you eat too much or you always were hungry. That’s when you not only developed insecurities about your body but you’re eating as well. You would notice when you went out with friends they wouldn’t eat much and you didn’t want to be the one eating more than everyone else.
So whenever you were with Bucky he would always suggest getting food or having a snack. Who knew super soldiers that workout all the time eat so much. Your reaction to this was always say you’re not hungry, you ate before you came over, you didn’t feel good, you had a list of excuses. You never ate more than a couple bites or a small snack of anything. You would always wait to eat when you got home.
Thankfully your relationship was young and you were taking things slow, you had never spent more than a day together and never spent the night at each other’s places. That was until one night when it was quite stormy and dark.
You and Bucky were sitting in his apartment on his couch, you had your legs tucked under you and were snuggled up to his side, head on his chest, with his arm around you. You were very comfortable and very warm, your eyes started getting heavy and you felt truly at peace in his arms.
Bucky starts rubbing up and down your arm to get your attention, he turns his head away from the tv screen in front of you and looks down at your curled up form tucked into his side.
“Hey it’s getting kinda late, I would say maybe you would want to go home but I don’t like you going out in this weather. How would you feel about maybe staying the night?”
You reach out for your phone on the table in front of you to check the time. It’s 11pm and it’s storming out. Rain is coming down hard, wind whipping, and it’s freezing out, he has a point you don’t really want to go through the city in this weather at this time of night.
You think about what he said, about staying the night. It sounds so nice being able to fall asleep next to him, but you can’t help but think about the pain in your stomach. Your so hungry, and eating in front of him seems so embarrassing, especially to have to ask for food. You planned to just eat when you went home, when Buck had ordered food earlier he asked what you wanted you said you weren’t really hungry you had a late lunch. The truth was you were hungry and you forgot to eat before you came over, you figured it would be fine though because you could just wait until you got home. Now that won’t be until tomorrow morning.
“Yeah, I mean I would love to stay if it’s not too much of a hassle”
He smiles from ear to ear throwing his arms around you and pulling you into him.
“Oh yeah! I get my girl all night now”
You can’t help but laugh at his goofy reaction, he’s truly such a sweet soul. You are laying half in his lap as he gently kisses your head, turns you around and places you so your head is laying in his lap looking up at him.
“This is so exciting, this is our first time spending a night together. I’ll get you some clothes to change into and you can shower if you want, are you hungry because you haven’t eaten anything all day.”
You simply smile up at him as he softly tucks your hair behind your ear.
“I’m okay, I told you I had a late lunch. And im not ready to go to bed yet can we stay like this for a little longer”
Still playing with your hair and looking down at you with a sweet smile he responds. “I’d be happy to stay like this for the rest of our lives. But maybe you could eat something, even if you had a late lunch it’s been hours and i worry”
He moves his other hand to rest on your stomach, if he had tried to do that at the beginning of your relationship you would have freaked, but he’s showed you that he truly loves every part of you even the parts you are the most insecure about. You rest your hand over his on your belly to reassure him you are fine.
“I’m not hungry I’m fine.”
“But you don’t eat enough, I barely see you eat. Please just have at least a little bit for my peace of mind.”
Just as you go to open your mouth and speak you feel and hear your stomach make horrible noises as if screaming to take Bucky up on the offer of food. You just close your mouth and look away from Bucky feeling guilty for lying to his face and embarrassed for having your stomach be loud enough to drown out the television.
“Let’s go, come on im making you some dinner” He sits you up and stands in front of you with his hands out ready to take yours. You still can’t process what just happened, you are beyond embarrassed. So you look up stunned at not only his reaction but his persistence in wanting to care for you, you take both his hands and stand up.
He moves both your hands into one of his and walks you towards his kitchen island, where he pulls out a chair for you and motions for you to sit. He then rounds the counter and opens the fridge taking inventory.
“Okay so we could do spaghetti, Mac and cheese, a pb&j or a grilled cheese. Pick your poison baby” He lists off all the options and turns to look over his shoulder at you.
You look up from picking at your fingers and see him gazing back at you, waiting for an answer. “Umm whatever is easiest is fine, thank you” your response is quiet but he hears you and starts to take things out of the fridge.
As he makes you food he hums soft melodies of old songs from his childhood. Swiftly and easily moving throughout the kitchen without any hesitation or look of upset.
“Here you go doll, eat up please it’s made with extra love” he places the dish right in front of you and turns to grab you some water. On the plate in front of you is two grilled cheese sandwiches, cut into perfect triangles.
Bucky places water down next to you and then takes the seat beside you.
“Please eat” he says as he places a hand on your back rubbing up and down your spine.
“Why did you make me two, I don’t need that much.” You say in a slightly anxious way.
“Well because I didn’t know how much you wanted and I didn’t want you to be uncomfortable to ask for more if you wanted it, that’s all. Just eat what you want and leave what you don’t, it’s not big deal.”
You look at your plate, you are really hungry and it looks so good. You pick up a half and take a bite, it’s just as good as it looked. But you can’t help but feel awkward just having him watch you eat. “Will you eat too, I feel weird eating alone”
“Of course you don’t have to ask me twice I’m always ready to eat” so he picks up another half and takes a bite.
You both sit and eat in silence for a minute until he places a hand on your knee and asks you a question. “Why didn’t you just tell me you were hungry, earlier or now? I feel like your never hungry, or at least that’s what you tell me. What’s the matter baby, tell me”
You swallow the grilled cheese and take a sip of water to wash it down before speaking.
“I don’t know I feel weird asking for food, I mean I feel weird eating in front of people in general especially you. Your so..you know all muscles and hotness and I’m squishy, I guess I just didn’t want you to judge me.”
The hand in your knee grips a little tighter, “Oh baby no don’t think like that. First of all I think your all curves and hotness so don’t ever think I’ll judge you for what you look like or eat. I love you so much and I don’t want you to feel like you have to go hungry while your with me because you think I’ll judge you for eating. It doesn’t make any sense to me baby, you need to eat that’s what keeps you alive and healthy and full of energy.”
“It’s not that I don’t eat, I just don’t like eating in front of people. Maybe you think I’ll eat too much or that I don’t eat all super healthy food. People can be really mean, and I think I just developed ways to stay safe from judgment.”
He wraps his arms around you and kisses the top of your head, holding you close. “Oh honey, your always safe with me. You could tell me you wanted to eat six whole pizzas and I’d buy them for you, sit next to you and eat seven myself. You are never going to be judged by me, never I promise you. But you have to promise me that you will eat when your hungry because I worry. Can you do that?”
You lean back and look him in the eyes, nodding your head yes. “Yeah I can do that”
At this point you both finished your food and are ready to get settled in for the night. Bucky takes the dirty plate and puts it in the sink to take care of tomorrow.
You follow him to his room where he pulls out some clothes for you. He hands you a shirt and a pair of boxers then leads you to the bathroom.
“Here is all my shampoo and soapy stuff, and I there are some extra toothbrushes under the sink. Help yourself to whatever you need, and I’ll be just out there watching some tv.”
You offer him a warm smile and he leans in, grabs your jaw and places a soft kiss on your lips. He was such a good man and he did everything he could to make you comfortable. It’s like he was your saving grace ready to scrub away all the dirt and scuffs people had left on your shiny soul and bright heart. So that way he can show you how beautiful of a person you are under all the damage people have done.
While in the shower you can’t help but feel like a weight had been lifted off you after your conversation tonight. You know Bucky loves everything about you and it makes you feel like all the bad things people had ever said to you didn’t matter anymore. The one person that does matter is erasing all those negative things they ever planted in your mind.
You wash up and brush your teeth, then put on the clothes that Bucky let you borrow. The shirt hung loose over your body stopping just below your hips, the boxers were soft and comfortable.
You leave the bathroom and walk into the bedroom to see Bucky leaning back in the bed on his phone. He’s wearing a pair of shorts and no shirt, and boy does he look pretty.
“Did you have a nice shower doll?” He asks not looking your way, he then turns his head to look at you. “Oh don’t you look pretty in my clothes.”
You laugh and walk up to the edge of the bed, pull the blankets back and sit down. “Your crazy, James I swear”
“Oh first the clothes now calling me James, ughh you are doing something to me.”
You blush and look at him, both of you with goofy smiles on your face. You and him have never done anything like that before. (taking things slow, remember) So you knew he was mostly just trying to get you flustered, and it was working.
You both get fully under the blankets and snuggle up together, you being the little spoon. You were never a small girl but next to him you felt like it. It felt comfortable and safe, like you knew nothing bad could happen when he was by your side.
He rests his hand over yours on your stomach, giving it a slight rub. “Is your tummy nice and happy, she’s not hungry anymore?”
You laugh at his silly question but you know he’s serious and he really does care. “Yeah she’s good”
“Good, if my girl is happy then I’m happy. Good night my love sweet dreams.”
“Sweet dreams Bucky, I love you.”
That night you dreamt of grilled cheese, your sexy shirtless boyfriend and his caring heart. The best part is, when you wake up in the morning it’s all real and it’s all yours.
——————————————————————————
Masterlist
391 notes · View notes