I’m finally ready for you anon…
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thinking abt how i was feeling SO brave about planning to make a noahmc endgame route but then lucas shows up once doing the MOST and i was immediately like. u are so real king im SO sorry for straying from the lucasmc vision i won't do it again 😭 like noah will still be in love with mc bc honestly noah NOT being in love with them feels like a key seasoning is missing from the soup. but lucas baby. you would be my main endgame 🥺
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On the 29th of March, sixteen years ago, KARA released their debut studio album, The First Bloooooming.
It is the only album featuring Sunghee, who left in 2008 to pursue a higher education. The album was unfortunately not a commercial success and went unrecognized by the public.
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Instructions // Eavan Boland
To write about age you need to take something and
break it.
(This is an art that has always loved young women.
And silent ones.)
A branch, perhaps, girlish with blossom. Snapped off.
Close to the sap.
Then cut through a promised summer. Continue. Cut
down to the root.
The spring afternoon will come to your door, angry
as any mother. Ignore her.
Now take syntax. Break that too. What is left is for you
and you only:
A dead tree. The future. What does not bear fruit. Or
thinking of.
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sobbing into my plate after overhearing a conversation between a mom and her tiny daughter in this shopping centre food court
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Despite what you may have heard Bruce Wayne is not, in fact, a furry.
He is, however, very opinionated.
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me reading straight up pornography: hmm… this one just doesn’t have enough accurate character psychoanalysis to get me off
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Something that literally changed my life was working with a friend on a coding thing. He was helping me create an auto rig script and was trying to explain something to me but his words were just turning into static in my brain. I was tired and confused and there was so many new concepts happening.
I could feel myself working toward a crying meltdown and was getting preemptively ashamed of what was about to happen when he said, “Hey, are you someone who benefits from breaks?”
It broke me.
Did I benefit from breaks? I didn’t know. I’d never taken them.
When a problem frustrated or upset me I just gritted my teeth and plowed through the emotional distress because eventually if you batter and flail at something long enough you figure it out. So what if you get bruised on the way.
I viscerally remembered in that moment being forced to sit at the table late into the night with my dad screaming at me, trying to understand math. I remembered taking that with me into adulthood and having breakdowns every week trying to understand coding. I could have taken a break? Would it help? I didn’t know! I’d never taken one!
“Yes,” I told him. We paused our call. I ate lunch. I focused on other stuff for half an hour. I came back in a significantly better state of mind, and the thing he’d been trying to explain had been gently cooking in the back of my head and seemed easier to understand.
Now when I find myself gritting my teeth at problems I can hear his gentle voice asking if I benefit from breaks. Yes, dear god, yes why did I never get taught breaks? Why was the only way I knew to keep suffering until something worked?
I was relating to this same friend recently my roadtrip to the redwoods with my wife. “We stopped every hour or so to get out and stretch our legs and switch drivers. It was really nice. When I was a kid we’d just drive twelve hours straight and not stop for anything, just gas. We’d eat in the car and power through.”
He gave a wry smile, immediately connecting the mindset of my parents on a road trip to what they’d instilled in me about brute forcing through discomfort. “Do you benefit from breaks?” he echoed, drawing my attention to it, making me smile with the same sad acknowledgement.
Take breaks. You’re allowed. You don’t have to slam into problems over and over and over, let yourself rest. It will get easier. Take. Breaks.
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