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darn-it-all-to-heck · 4 years

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Ugh I feel like shit what the hell? My “break” didn’t really feel like a break it was just work on work on work on work. My ass is just trying to enjoy the stuff that I like but why can’t my stupid ass just feel better about myself???????? BITCH WHAT THE FUCK. I don’t feel like I’ve been myself lately.

I’m a piece of shit fucking worthless average piece of fucking shit lowlife shit fuck me im so stupid.

Who the hell do i think I am. Is this just a continuation of unresolved issues from the past??? What more do I need?? Oh wait my stupid fucking ass is fucking forgetful. Piece of shit. What a fucking piece of shit. I’m ANGRY at myself!!!!! the hell is the matter with me???

Day 1 of break:

Can’t tell my parents that I’m basically failing all of my classes because I’m stupid.

Go to combo. What the hell was that this week??? I am trying to run a smooth gig but none of my freaking winds are helping run the show!!! Am I going to have to require them to have notebooks on what we work on in practice?? Can you guys just freaking listen to the songs??? Is it that hard?? “Oh idk if we can do that because we didn’t run it”. GAHHH

IF EVERYONE JUST LISTENED TO THE MUSIC THEN WE WOULDNT HAVE THIS PROBLEM!!!!!!!!

I SHOULDVE JUST SET EVERYTHING UP FOR THE STUPID FUCKING GIG SO WE DON’T RUN INTO THESE STUPID PREVENTABLE PROBLEMS. IDIOTTTTTTTTTTT. WHY ARE YOU SO FREAKING TIRED YOU DONT DO ANYTHING YOU PEICE OF SHIT ASS FUCK. GOD DAMN!!!!

Is it really my fault that they don’t know how to do anything like setting up or anything? PISS

What a great first impression for your friend huh? I must seem very professional with THE STUPID FUCKING THINGS THAT WENT WRONG WITH THE STUPID GIG IDFUCKING CARE ABOUT THE AMOUBT OF MONEY THAT SHIT IS WORTHLESS IF I DONT FEEL LIKE I RIGHTFULLY EARNED THAT SHIT ITS STUPID I FUCKING HATE THAT GUY

OH ITS 21+ FUCKK YOU FUCKING ASS HAT FUCK YOU FUCKKKKKKKKKK FUCKING DO YOUR DAMN FUCKING JOB AND PROMOTE US PAY YOUR DAMN LIGHT BILL ANF FUCKING TURN THE FUCKING MUSIC OFF IF YOU HACE A BAND PLAYING AT YOUR SHITTY ASS VENUE YOU PIECE OF SHIT MOTHERFUCKING ASS PISS WHO AM I GOING TO PLAY FOR IF NO ONES THERE AND DONT YOU DARE DONT YOU FUCKING DARE COME TO ME AND SAY YOU DIDNT BRING LOTS OF PEOPLE TO MY BAR SO IM GOING TO SHAVE OFF A COUPLE HUNDRED YOU FUCKING BOUNCINGASS CHECK PIECE OF SHIT GOOD LUCK FINDING ANOTHER GULLIBLE BAND THAT WILL PLAY FOR YOUR SORRY ASS BECAUSE IM TAKING MY BAND OUT OF YOUR PIECE OF SHIT PLAVE FUCKING ASSS. GET YOUR FUCKING HEAD OUT OF YOUR DAMN ASS YOU PRICK.

I’m a terrible leader in my band. I’m not even that good why am I even playing bass I can’t do anything. I can’t even play it that well I’m playing like a middle schooler. Fuck you for thinking that you actually got better fucking piece of shit.

Do your damn hw other people can balance all this and more why can’t you?? Are you stupid?? Are you just lazy?????

Why can’t I just have a break break where I’m not doing anything? I don’t want to think about anything or do anything. I just want to lie down in bed and sleep.

And what the fuck was that at Starbucks???? You’re almost 22 and you’re acting like a damn child just get up and say hi if you wanted to talk. Fuckin dryer than my first relationship. God damn.

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