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#beeker
embarrassingjon · 1 year
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ATTENTION
Hey homies!!!
I have a redbubble now! There will likely be more stuff added pretty soon, but as of now there are 6 of my favorite paintings that I did ready to go! They are on just about everything that Redbubble offers!
If theres something you want the painting on that isn’t listed, or you want to buy the original painting, DM me and we can get something sorted out! Please consider checking out my shop and sharing with your friends!
Here is the shop!
And here’s some examples of my work!
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imageoscillite · 1 year
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Just some Muppets lip-syncing Beastie Boys' So Whatcha Want.
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myckicade · 7 months
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When your day devolves from...
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to...
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jeweled-weevil · 1 year
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How have I not seen this on here yet?
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Video
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The Muppet Show. Swedish Chef, Animal and Beaker - Danny Boy (ep 520)
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captainpirateface · 1 year
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I'm gonna end up being a "Glue Nuker"....
Faaaawk.
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bugsmunched · 2 months
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"My Slut" - Derek Danforth X Reader
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Summary: A jealous Derek confronts Y/N, one of his mother's employees, about flirting with a bunch of guys at a party when they were supposed to be there to keep him in line.
A/N: This was a little rushed ngl, but I did my best My Jhutch hyperfixation is coming back. So expect more fics, and please remember if you have any ideas please share!
Contents: GN! Reader, drug usage, smoking, drinking, plot? What plot, filthy smut, Dom! Derek, degradation, use of 'slut' and 'bitch', choking, spitting, impact play, face fucking, spoiled brat Derek, no mentions of readers' genitals, hate fucking, no prep, no protection (wrap that shit), dumbification, possessive Derek, jealous Derek
Word Count: 2750
SMUT UNDER CUT, MINORS DNI!!
"I'm not your property, Danforth." you spat, venom lacing your words as you stared at him in a cold, annoyed manner.
"Aren't you?" he asked, raising a brow and looking at you with all the arrogance in the world.
God, he was SO annoying. You couldn't believe the audacity of this sociopathic con artist. "No Derek, contrary to popular belief, I don't fucking belong to you. I don't even work for you remember? Your mother hired me. " You hissed, placing the glass of bourbon that was in your hand onto the table in front of you.
"Well I don't think my mother hired you to flirt with a bunch of men like a little whore now did she?" He asked, taking a long drag of the joint that rested in his hand.
"She hired me to keep an eye on you, Derek. I'm a glorified babysitter, I might as well have a little bit of fun whilst trying to keep you sober. "
"Yeah you don't exactly do a good job of that, now do you? I wonder if my mother knew how poor of a job you were doing. "
"You threatening my job? " You snorted, rolling your eyes in amusement. "You're threatening my job just because I flirted with a couple of guys, how mature of you Danforth. "
"just flirted with a couple of guys?" He asked, raising a brow in amusement. "Honey-"
"Don't." You warned him, not wanting to hear the sickening nickname fall out of his mouth.
"Don't fucking interrupt me, slut. " He growled, his eyes narrowing with anger. " As I was saying before you opened your disgusting mouth- Honey, I don't think palming a guy in the corner counts as 'just flirting.' And the entire party does not count as 'just a couple guys.' You're a slut, admit it. "
Your face turned a bright pink, you hadn't realized that he knew about that. It had been a spur-of-the-moment thing, the drinks had just hit and one guy kept eyeing you up and down. So, when you noticed that Derek was preoccupied by some other guy talking about crypto or some similar nonsense, you snuck off and made out with the guy in the corner. But you were so deprived, that you had begun palming him desperately like a highschooler at a dance. But before it could escalate to anything more, you heard Derek calling you away, unaware that he had been watching you the entire time, seething with anger.
"I'm not a slut, Derek. If anyone's the slut it's you. You're the one who's hooking up with someone new every time I turn my head. " That really got him going. He placed the burnt-out joint in the ashtray in front of him and stood up, swiftly walking over to you, standing over you.
"You want to say that again?" He challenged, crouching down in front of you and meeting your gaze. When you didn't say anything, he growled and grabbed your chin. "What? Now you've finally decided to shut that big mouth of yours?" his grasp on your chin was harsh, yet his gaze was even harsher. Fire plagued his gaze, and his jaw clenched.
" Let go of me, you sociopath." You snapped, matching his energy.
"You can't talk to me like that. " He huffed, his grip on your chin tightening, leaving red marks on either side of your face.
"I can speak however I damn please, you don't control my paychecks."
"Someone needs to show you how to fucking respect others. " He said as he let go of your face. You rubbed the sore sides of your face, looking up at him with a scowl.
"Someone needs to teach you how to not be such a spoiled brat, you useless fucking-"
Your harsh words were cut off as his hand found itself wrapped around your throat. "shut up." he growled, squeezing the sides of your throat. Your face turned a bright red as you fought back a whimper from the feeling. When you stopped speaking, he smirked, clearly satisfied with the results of his actions. "That's all it takes to shut you up, huh? All the little slut needed was a hand around their throat?" he cooed, squeezing a little harsher.
You tried to speak, but your brain was a little bit fuzzy from the feeling of having a strong hand wrapped around your throat like that. You felt so stupid, so vulnerable, to have been so thrown off by that.
"You really are nothing but a slut, and I don't like that. I can't stand seeing you flirt with other men. You see, I don't have a problem with the fact that you are a slut, I have a problem with the fact that you're not my slut. " He said as malice laced his words.
You gave a little bit of a whine, looking up at him with desperation in your eyes. Your cocky demeanor had completely faded away, as it had changed into something new, something far more desperate and needy. Maybe he was right, maybe you were a slut...and maybe you should be his.
"C'mon baby, say something." he cooed, loosening his grip on your throat for a moment so you could speak. But you were absolutely star-struck at the moment, at a complete loss for words. When you didn't speak, a hand harshly landed a blow across your face, leaving a bright red mark. "I said say something. That wasn't a request, you dumb fuck. "
"Make me- make me yours. " You managed to stutter out, the smack he left on your cheek causing it to sting.
"Oh look, you can speak after all! The dumb slut can speak." He said with feigned amusement in his voice. "And they know their place. " He purred softly as he let go of your throat completely, standing up from his crouched position. " On your knees. And don't make me repeat myself again." He commanded.
You slipped off the couch and fell to your knees in front of him, looking up at him with pitiful, desperate eyes. What was happening to you? As soon as you were on your knees, his pants and boxers were around his ankles, belt resting in his hands, and his surprisingly girthy and pierced cock sprung free, half-hard already from the attention he was giving you. A hand harshly gripped at your hair and tugged you close to him, looping the belt around your neck and pulling it tight, much like a leash.
In one hand he held the belt that was wrapped around your neck, in the other he held his half-hard cock, stroking over the Jacob's ladder piercings. After a few moments, his cock stood at attention, a bead a precum leaking from the tip. He pulled you close via the belt, pushing his leaking tip against your lips. His other hand cupped your cheek, stroking it gently. "Open. " He commanded, and you quickly obeyed.
You parted your lips, which were now glistening with his pre-cum, as he pushed his dick into your mouth. He wasted no time in tugging on the belt, which forced you to take more of him down your throat. The balls of his piercings rubbed strangely against the walls of your throat, but you welcomed the new sensation.
Soon enough, he had forced himself all the way down your throat, balls pressed against your chin. "You really are a slut, huh?" he asked in amusement, amazed at how easily you took him down your throat. "Have you been sucking dicks behind my back? huh?" he asked as he spat on your face, it sliding down, coating your eyelashes in the process. You shook your head, trying to say something in protest, but that just caused you to gag on his cock, spit bubbling from your own mouth and dripping down your chin. It slipped off of your chin and dripped onto the floor. "You're cleaning that up later, fucking bitch. " He remarked, smacking your face lightly.
After a few moments of forcing your nose into the base of his cock, he pulled his hips away, leaving you panting with spit dripping down your face. After giving you a second to breathe, he smirked before slamming back into your mouth, holding the belt tightly in his hand as he began to roughly thrust in and out. His tip kept hitting the back of your throat, causing you to gag, which caused more spit to drip down your chin and pool on the floor.
"Fucking bitch, making such a mess." He growled, spitting on your face once again, his hand that was resting on your face going up to your hair, tangling itself in the strands roughly.
He loved the sight below him; you drooling and spitting all over his cock as his spit dripped down your face, his cock pumping in and out of your throat. The sight alone was almost enough to push him over the edge, but he wasn't anywhere near done with you.
Once again he pushed you all the way down his shaft, shoving your nose into the base of his cock. "Choke on it you dumb slut. " he growled softly, watching as you tried to breathe, which caused you to start choking on his dick, more spit bubbling on the corners of your mouth. Once he was satisfied with the mess you made on the floor beneath you, he pushed your head away, leaving you a panting mess once again.
"Looks like we finally found a use for that mouth that isn't bitching and whining, isn't that right, honey?" He cooed, using the belt that was wrapped around your neck to pull you off of the ground, his spare hand resting on your side. " answer me." he growled, his eyes filled with a dangerous lust.
"Y-yes sir." you managed to stutter out, the name for him falling out of your lips far easier than you would like to admit. he smirked at the nickname, his cock twitching in satisfaction.
"Call me that again." He purred softly, the hand resting on your side making its way to your clothes ass, gripping at it harshly.
"S-sir."
He smacked your ass, "Again." he commanded.
"Sir!" You yelped out, whining at the light sting on your clothed ass, imagining how much more that would sting if you were unclothed.
"Good job, slut. Now, undress and bend yourself over that table over there. " He said, pointing to a table that held alcohol and other drugs over in the corner.
You quickly obliged as he let go of the belt. You practically tore off your clothes, rushing over to the table and bending yourself over it, biting your lip. You scolded yourself for being so excited to fuck Derek Danforth, someone that you were hired to keep from fucking random people and doing drugs.
He sauntered his way over to you and pushed your face harshly into the table, the head of his cock pressing against your entrance. "Fuck, look at you, so eager for me to fuck you. Your boss' son, bending you over the desk and dicking you down, it's kind of pathetic, really. " He remarked, smacking your ass a few times till both cheeks were bright pink. The smacks caused you to mewl in pleasure, back arching against him slightly.
After prodding your entrance with the swollen and ripping head of his cock, he finally pushed past the barrier and sheathed himself inside of you. He didn't try and go slow, he just shoved himself deep inside of you as quick as he could, a groan escaping his lips. The lack of prep caused the stretch to burn your hole, making you wince and take a few deep, sharp breaths. You weren't used to being so full.
But before you could get used to the feel of being stretched out, he pulled nearly all the way out before slamming back in, causing your body to jolt forward, eyes rolling back slightly at the rough thrust. He repeated that rough thrust a few times, one hand resting on your hip, the other shoving your face into the desk. The harsh thrusts drew long, high pitched whines and moans from your mouth, hands gripping at the table harshly, nails digging into the wood.
"ah-ah! Slo-slow down!" You whined out, your pleading being muffled by the table. He smirked at your pleading, hips speeding up, the sound of skin hitting skin filling the air.
"I don't think I will. " He spoke in an arrogant tone, continuing to thrust his hips forward, burying his cock inside of you. A few moans fell from his lips, the grip on your hip tightening, he was sure to leave a few bruises.
" fu-fuck you." You spat, wincing as a hand collided with your ass harshly once again, a shiver being sent up your spine.
"Watch your fucking tone with me. " He growled softly, continuing to harshly piston his hips into you. His nails dug into your flesh lightly, leaving marks. "you're my little slut, aren't you?" He purred softly.
You moaned in response which caused him to smack your ass once again. " Say it. Say that you're my little slut. Tell me that you're sorry for flirting with other men. "
You opened your mouth to talk, but no words came out, your brain fuzzy from the feeling of being fucked like an animal. "oh, is the poor slut already fucked stupid? You're in for a long night, poor baby. " He mocked you, giving a particularly harsh thrust which caused you to cry out in pleasure. He stilled his hips for a moment, laying a harsh slap to your ass. "Still, I need to hear the words...say that you're my little slut. " He hummed softly, massaging the fat of your ass between his fingers.
"I-I'm yours..."
"You're my what?" he cooed, grinding his hips into you, which caused a long, drawn-out whine to fall from your lips.
"your little slut.."
"C'mon, use all your words..."
"I'm your little slut."
"I'm your little slut - what?" he mocked you, prompting you.
"si-sir. "
"Good job, bitch." He growled as he started up his thrusting once again, pulling nearly all the way out just before slamming right back into your tight hole harshly.
Foul, lewd sounds fell out of both of your lips, Derek's head rolling back slightly as he fucked into you like you were his personal fleshlight. He groped your ass, his nails leaving red marks as he marked his territory. He wanted to make sure that people knew you were his little slut, that you belonged to him. You were his little toy and he was your owner. He leaned forward and started leaving love bites on your neck, both in a way to mark you as his and a way to muffle his moans, which were slowly turning into whimpers as he got closer to his climax.
You, meanwhile, were already in a state of fucked out bliss, eyes rolling into the back of your head as you felt that knot in your stomach tighten. Your knees were becoming weak, and your entire body felt like it was on fire. You tried to warn Derek that you were about to cum, but you couldn't talk, so all you did was whine and smack at the table with your hand, arching your back to make him go deeper.
However, he was lost in his own pleasure and neglected to recognize the signs of you getting close, his thrusts quickening due to his own desperation for a release. After a few more thrusts, you yelped, a few tears rolling down your cheek as you came undone, but he barely even noticed, his growls turning into high-pitched whines as his hips stuttered.
You whined, feeling overstimulated, but soon enough he was coming undone inside of you. Thick ropes began to paint your insides, causing you to whimper at the feeling of being so full. He pulled out, which caused you to gasp at the sudden lack of something being stuffed inside your desperate hole.
He stood up straight and looked at you for a moment before realizing that you had made a mess of your own. He smacked your ass harshly, which caused you to whine out. "Dumb slut, you didn't ask for permission. Looks like... you're going to have to be punished." He murmured. You looked back and realized that he had already gotten hard once again. You were in for a long night.
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garadinervi · 10 days
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Lies Ros, Henk van den Berg: assemblages, Kunstuitkijk Deventer, October 11 – November 15, [year?] [NAGO – Nederlands Archief Grafisch Ontwerpers]
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lilithsaintcrow · 1 year
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Today has gone precisely like Beeker the Muppet attempting ODE TO JOY.
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ilovebender · 2 years
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ilbioeconomista · 6 months
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BIC published a Trend Report on how Europe can unleash the full potential of the bioeconomy
Berlaymont, European Commission’s Headquarter in Brussels For the first time, BIC has published a Trend Report on how Europe can unleash the full potential of the bioeconomy, enabling it to better contribute to the EU’s green transition. In 2012, the world admired Europe as a global frontrunner for launching its EU bioeconomy strategy. Today, the world and Europe look to other regions that are…
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gorey · 7 months
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b1rdcatchers · 29 days
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muppet Great Gatsby casting
I read this once in eighth grade forgive me
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kermit could not be gatsby because i respect him too much
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alternative: beeker as owl eyes because his funny noises are drunk-adjacent
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^I know this is a deep dive into the archives but she is such an excellent foil I can't let it go. She isn't as conventionally attractive as daisy but her eyes hold an immense vitality
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^apparently the old guys in the book are jewish my bad
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continuing the proposition that beeker is owl eyes: *looks into casket* “meep meep“
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theygotlost · 17 days
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peeky beekers is the most heterosexual show on earth i cant even think of a single character dynamic that could be grounds for gay shipping even to the most deranged tumblrinas. i need to start conjuring up femslash that doesnt make any sense. ESME AND LIZZIE SHOULD FUCK
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madnessmadness · 9 months
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"aaaw! Is that beeker?!"
"...yes."
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violeaes · 7 months
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[id: official art of akane kurashiki in greyscale. she looks at the viewer with a grim expression, one hand over her chest, the other extended outward. the background behind her is white. the second image is a screenshot of a spotify playlist. the name is "each time i die," followed by the following songs: each time i die by bones and beeker, when i was done dying by dan deacon, self proclaimed angel by katachi, villain by stella jang, ship in a bottle by fin, satin in a coffin by modest mouse, and eat shit and die by harley poe. end id].
Now, who am [I]? I am [I], the 9th letter of the alphabet. But I am also [Zero]. ...No, that's not true. I'm not really Zero. Not yet. Perhaps you could say I am...[less than Zero]. Zero is my future. In 9 years... I will be [Zero].
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