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violent138 · 3 days

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Lots of the newer heroes struggle with gadgets, hacking, or need some guidance on the finer points of superheroing and when they find their way to Batman they're super nervous. What they don't expect is that a massive nerd with tons of experience teaching kids, who's heard every stupid question under the sun, and is more than willing to help them with what they need to know.

#Gotham churns out heroes on the regular #and just in general I assume people find their way to him (plenty of crossovers) and end up asking a few burning questions #the number of teachers this guy's had and the amount of times he's trained people over and over #he loves it enough to help most people #batman #bruce wayne #batman headcanons #Yeah yeah yeah he's been an occasional bad dad and harsh teacher #Sorry I'm choosing to focus a little more on the softer parts of canon #dc comics

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devilfic · 1 month

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I've seen some comic panels touching on this and I just love the idea of bruce being a little stalker and you having to make peace with it.

you leave for work and then come back five minutes later because you forgot where you left your wallet and then you get a text from bruce that says “bathroom counter upstairs” because he just happened to be watching the tower's camera feed at the time.

or having to take a longer way home because a road has been closed off and getting a call from bruce because he noticed you taking turns you don’t usually take to get back to the tower. he stays on the phone with you until you get back home, even though you know he's on patrol right now because you can hear the wind on the other end.

god forbid you head out somewhere late at night without telling him first. he won't ask questions, he'll just follow you from a safe distance until he's ready to make himself known. when you (reasonably) yell at him about it, he apologizes (very insincerely) and asks what you're up to.

bruce has spent years perfecting the craft of stealth and on top of that, he is a worrywart. he's not the type to fawn over your every move right in front of you. he just... pays attention. watches. plans accordingly. if you are a loved one of bruce's, you are never truly out of sight. take that how you will, he's not gonna change

#I would say bruce has life360 but he's got like. an app of his own that's like life360 on crack. it violates several international laws #he will not bring these things up to you but you will be made aware of them eventually #I didn't write this with battinson specifically in mind. this is just what I think of batman in general #bruce wayne x reader #bruce wayne headcanons #bruce wayne fluff #bruce wayne #batman x reader #batman headcanons #batman fluff #batman #dc #mjwrites #if you saw me post this twice it's because the first time it disappeared...

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oldmannapping · 30 days

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Headcanon:

Scarecrow is the most left-wing, progressive, banner-waving, protest-marching rogue in Gotham.

Why?

Because fears rooted in systemic abuses of power are boring.

He wants something juicy. He wants a fear rooted in a personal insecurity that cuts deep into an individual’s fragile psyche.

He doesn’t want every minority’s biggest fear to be the cops. That’s BORING.

He gets so upset when people’s biggest fears are being outed. He hates bigots because they make fears predictable.

So every time there’s a petition, every time there’s a protest, every time Gotham’s streets get closed for another march, Scarecrow’s there.

He’s handing out water bottles and sunscreen, he’s reminding everyone what the hashtags are, he’s coordinating with Red Hood’s goons to hold back the police presence and keep the protests peaceful.

Then he’s going back to his crazy lab to design a toxin that will obliterate the sanity of every single person in Gotham, and so help the city if someone hallucinates their transphobic uncle again.

#batman #red hood #scarecrow #scarecrow dc #jonathan crane #Batman headcanons #gotham city #headcanon

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mysadcorner · 8 months

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Could you write stealing clothing from (Bale) Bruce wayne headcanons please??

Stealing Bruce Wayne's (Bale) Clothes Headcanons

-Credit to the gifs owner - Please be specific about characters wanted in requests -

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• Bruce would be speechless if he ever caught you wearing his clothes without telling him beforehand. It would certainly be in a good way, though. It entices him and he approves of it fully, especially if his clothes end up being massively oversized on you due to how large he is and much he works out.

• He would be more than happy for it to happen often, and wouldn’t do anything to stop you. He loves the fact that you’re comfortable enough to wear his clothes, especially as he hasn’t had many people want to be close with him like that in a genuine way. The more you wear his clothes the better.

• Having others see you wearing his clothes wouldn’t bother him in slightest, as long as you aren’t uncomfortable by it. Someone simply being around his home while you wear one of his shirts makes him feel closer to you, and warms him inside knowing that you’re willing to be public about your affection toward him, even if it is just a small simple gesture.

• If Bruce ever felt like he was going through too many of his clothes, or you were simply taking his favourite pieces all the time, he would then buy more to make sure he always had enough around for the both of you. He doesn’t want you to wear his clothes less and if that means having duplicates of his favourite clothes just so you can both wear them then he’s more than fine with that. And it’s not as though he can’t afford to do so.

• Seeing you wear his shirts to bed make things even more intimate, and you probably find them more comfortable than wearing normal nightwear. You can always be sure that his clothes are well made and breathable meaning you won’t feel restricted in them, and due to the size of his shirts they’ll cover you well. Despite him sleeping shirtless most nights, he finds you sleeping in his clothes quite endearing.

• Bruce finds the sight of you wearing his clothes incredibly attractive, and it’ll probably be the cause of him initiating intimacy more often when he has the time to. You’re adorable and sexy at the same time, so depending on whether you want an intimate or relaxing time with him he’ll be more than willing for either.

• He will always encourage you to wear his clothes more often and will even start to consult you about the clothes he buys before he decides on them to see what you think about them and weather you would like to wear them too. He may even go out of his way to wear his clothes for a short period of time before handing them over to you if you prefer to wear them with the smell of him on them, or will let you use his cologne to make the shirts smell more like him when he’s away for a while.

• When you have decided on your favourite pieces of clothes to wear of his, then he’ll start to form emotional attachments to those specific pieces. He becomes associated with you through the clothes you’ve chosen and is reminded of you every time he picks out his clothes for the day by seeing each of those clothing items. If you’re ever separated for a while he’ll take some of these with him as a reminder of you and may even hope to see you wearing them again once he gets back.

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alienguts · 3 months

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Bruce + Bookworm S/O (Bruce Wayne x GN!Reader HCs)

Warnings: none

A/N: just a little something i thought of while at work. Part 4 of Picking Up the Pieces is still in the works!

Despite being someone who has No Spare Time™, Bruce is very well read.

He was reading the classics by the time he was ten years old, so he's got the reading skills and the literary chops, he just doesn't have a lot of time.

While his favourite titles are by authors like Charles Dickens or Sun Tzu, he doesn't know a lot about modern authors.

Sure, he knows who Stephen King is, but he doesn't know Stephen King.

He's been asked at charity events for schools and libraries what he thinks of recent releases, and while he tries to have at least a vague idea of what's the hottest thing, he usually has a default answer.

Depending on what mood he's in, he either refers back to the classics, or plays on the 'dumb playboy' persona and says that he hasn't read a book since high school.

When he found out that you were a huge bookworm, he tried to become more knowledgeable about modern literature.

You likely met in a bookstore that he took Damian to and struck up a conversation with you over a book that you were reading the back of.

You'd noticed him numerous times while browsing and often overheard the store's staff talking about Bruce Wayne and his pushy son, but you never thought that he would ever talk to you.

Your first date was, of course, in the bookstore's café and he treated you to whatever you wanted, including books.

You didn't want to push your chances with him, but he was happy to get you that special cloth bound edition that you thought you wouldn't be able to afford.

The study is your favourite room in the entire Manor, and he learnt that quickly.

You get to have a Beauty and the Beast library in real life, things don't get better than that!

Most of the books there are old editions or academic journals that have been accumulated in the 100+ years people have lived in the Manor.

Eventually, some colour will be incorporated into the shelves and there will be an eclectic mix of covers in amongst all the brown spines.

There are times when Bruce has come home very late from a gala or from patrol and found you still awake, reading in bed.

"Sweetheart, I think you should get some sleep now." "Just let me finish this chapter first."

God help him if he ever tries to take a book out of your hands.

He's fought gods, monsters, serial killers, and weird giant crocodile men but he wouldn't even think about taking a book from you while you're reading.

#bruce wayne x reader #bruce wayne x you #bruce wayne imagine #bruce wayne headcanons #batman x reader #batman x you #batman imagine #batman headcanons #dc x reader #dc x you #dc imagine #dc headcanons #gender neutral reader #x reader #self ship #*headcanons #*my writing

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bigfan-fanfic · 1 year

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A Captive Bat (Batdad!Reader x Bruce Wayne)

Requested by @capturingthecountryside for Batman practicing escapism when his husband starts to play with him.

When you wake up, you realize with a bit of confusion that you're in the library.

Usually Bruce will finish with his activities down in the cave and move upward to collect you so you both can go to bed together.

So instead you figure he lost track of time.

When you deftly press the piano key passphrase that slides aside the grandfather clock, and step into the industrial elevator, the grinding of machinery is almost too loud to really hear anything over - it's only once you're at the bottom of the elevator shaft that you can hear the soft grunting.

It almost sounds like - no, that couldn't be possible.

Another moan sounds out, and you approach to find your frustrated young husband struggling.

He's removed the Batsuit, and is clad only in the compression gear he wears under it - black tights that leave very little to the imagination, and a thin black tank top that you can practically see his abs through. He wears a pair of dark combat boots as well, but what really strikes you is that he is quite heavily restrained.

It's clear that he hasn't lost track of time, but instead just overestimated his own talent for escapism.

Thick, rigid handcuffs are placed on each of his wrists, almost painfully stretching his back into a bend over the back of the chair, his arms pulled back and locked in place.

White cord holds his ankles in place, drawn up and tied to his thighs, lifted on either side of him, shackled to the crossbars between the legs of the chair as a secondary restraint. His thighs are helplessly spread by rope, his torso heaving as he struggles, ropes holding him as close as possible to the chair with his back bent so far. He's dripping sweat, hair damp as he struggles.

However, he's made little progress. He's gotten one wrist free, and is in the process of picking the padlock on the matching ankle (though the ropes holding his arms in place impair his movement), when he notices you.

He shoots you an exhausted smirk. "Hey there. Sorry I couldn't tell you about the delay. As you can see, I'm a little... tied up."

You simply pluck the key out of his hand, and he gives a little whine.

"Honestly, I'm disappointed in you, Bruce. You don't even have safety scissors to get out! Haven't you learned anything from me about self-bondage?"

He rolls his eyes. "This isn't me trying to get off, my darling, I'm training. Falcone's thugs aren't gonna leave safety scissors out for me if I lose circulation!"

You roll your eyes right back. "Sure, big guy. And they're going to ignore your boner too."

Bruce blushes. "Oh, that's... a newer development. I didn't expect to get... caught."

"Is that so?" You straddle him, listening to his groan with satisfaction as your weight causes him to feel even more restricted.

You lean forward, your chest touching his, as you undo some of the ropes holding him, and you ease him back so his spine is returned to a relaxed position, before you quickly tie his arms back in place, this time not apart, but a far more simple position, using both sets of handcuffs to hold his wrists together, and the ropes to draw them slightly up so he can't move without straining his upper arms or shoulders.

"I think you wanted me to find you like this, Bruce. You like it so much when I take control."

Bruce's eyes flutter closed, moaning as he throws his head back, but the combination of his own bondage and your revisions ensure he can't move an inch.

"The problem here is that you assume you CAN get out of a situation. Escapism demands preparation, and if you're stripped like this, you're not going to have a skeleton key on you." You wink and dangle the key in front of Bruce before setting it in a drawer of the Batcomputer's console. You stride across the room to grab a scalpel from the medbay before slicing the tank top off your husband's body. He raises an eyebrow.

"Just checking you don't have anything else on you."

He smirks. "Oh, sure."

Your eyes linger on the sweaty muscles of Bruce's torso. "You're MY prisoner now."

He shifts a little, flexing. "I still think I could get out."

You grin. "Then you may try. But if you fail, if you give up... then I decide when you go free. Got it?"

He blinks several times before grinning wildly. "Deal."

You quickly grab a leather strap with a rubber ball placed in the center, and place the ball gag in your husband's mouth, savoring the way that Bruce's crystal blue eyes darken, before you tie a silken blindfold over them.

He moans into the gag as your hands run down his chest.

It's sweet that he still thinks he can get out. But your lesson to him tonight is different - sometimes, when he is captured, he may not even WANT to escape.

Especially when his loving captor has such devious fun in mind for him...

#male reader #batdad reader #bruce wayne x male reader #bruce wayne x reader #batman x male reader #batman x reader #batman headcanons #headcanons

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batmans-malewife · 5 months

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weird little facts about my rogues cuz thats funner than actually making lore for them

catwoman doesnt have many friends but she does have a little family of street kids reminiscent of the batfam that she teaches how to steal and stuff

riddler and scarecrow are notably neutral toward each other but harley keeps trying to set them up and they keep going on awkward dinner dates with each other to keep her happy

on the scarecrow note, hes kind of like a gotham city cryptid when in costume, like people report sightings of him to the conspiracy blogs and stuff. they call him the weeping scarecrow and if you befriend him he gives you little trinkets like a crow

harley is a huge gamer but she just plays like wii sports resort and stuff. her scores on wii table tennis are scary high

catwoman does quadrobics

poison ivy and harley are technically homeless but they crash so much at catwomans apartment that theyre basically just all roommates. they dont pay rent though and selina keeps threatening to kick them out but never does

harley and joker only actually dated in high school but he made a huge deal of it for years and kept trying to get back with her

scarecrow and killer moth are friends

riddler and harley quinn are also friends, they went to high school together and also dated when they were teens but it only lasted for like two weeks

riddler is constantly moving between apartments and convinces penguin to let him stay in the iceberg lounge or give him money sometimes when he cant make rent. he owes him like, a lot of money at this point and has no intent to actually pay it off

catwoman follows stray cats around sometimes for fun to see where they go. they never do anything very interesting

#gotham #batman #riddler #oswald cobblepot #edward nygma #batman rogues #catwoman #selina kyle #batman villains #poison ivy #harley quinn #pamela isley #harleen quinzel #gotham city sirens #scarecrow #jonathan crane #batman headcanons

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smartycvnt · 3 months

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Smutty hcs with Pamela Isely please?

Pamela is very dominant and not afraid to tell you exactly what she wants from you

You have to mean something to Pamela for her to give you the antidote for her pheromones and poison

Pamela likes to make you cum first because that really gets her going better than anything else

If you're into it, she'll use vines to hold you down while she takes her time with you

Pamela isn't big on using strap-ons or many toys

She prefers her mouth and fingers

She doesn't mind if you use a toy with her, especially since she likes tiring you out when it's her turn

Things start out kind of vanilla, but Pamela slowly starts integrating you into a kinkier normal

There are always lines that she won't cross with you, but she does start working on some aphrodisiacs for the two of you to use together

#dc headcanons #dc comics headcanons #batman headcanons #poison ivy x reader #dc x reader #dc comics x reader #batman x reader #pamela isley x reader #headcanons #hcs #romantic headcanons #minors dni #smut hcs

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writing-nothing-but-spilled-ink · 13 days

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Joker head cannons

He definitely knows how to sew more then that he knows how to make clothing and he's really good with mending and making dresses if he feels like it

He's bisexual with a preference towards men like he has some attraction to woman but I feel like he more so views woman as easier to manipulate and control then men, tho he does have to find the woman attractive otherwise there's no real point for him to be with them, but even when he has a female partner hes still flirting with men any chance he gets and not just Batman but just some rando mobster he meets at one of the many bars in Gotham

He's definitely borrowed one or more of Harley's dresses and has had to make or order her a custom dress because he got blood on the one he borrowed and she's destroying his layer and killing his goons because it was her favorite and if he doesn't remedy it he'll have no competent goons to do his bidding..

Just like he hates Nazis he hates homophobia even more he can't be bothered with other things like abuse or domestic violence or murder but homophobia no he's hunting you down like a dog if he catches you on his turf dating to be homophobic god help you if you make a homophobic comment about him... I just imagine he just smiles and laughs and then kills you the most brutal way possible and then takes your body and starts parading it around Gotham as his date and even goes so far to go into a restaurant with the body orders dinner for both puts it on your credit card and opens a bottle of champagne like would you like more my love and starts cackling while the rest of the staff are horrified, I feel he'd even go so far as to carve words or something into your flesh and then finally dumps the body as a warning..

In that same vain if he's out and about enjoying a day off or day off adjacent for him and he's at a bar hell definitely be the life of the party mans will be flirting hardcore with any man he finds mildly attractive would definitely shoot you for not laughing at his jokes though

He has a whole warehouse full of custom dresses he's designed and had made and suits and other various costumes

He's a really good cook witch no one expects especially with cooking on a budget he can make like a five star meal out of the cheapest ingredients but if he has a choice hes a bit bougie, also I feel like he'd host a cooking class with his goons because they keep fucking up his breakfast and as he's teaching the class one of the goons burns the egg and he goes "oh sweetie that's not it at all", then grabs the goons face and holds it down onto the burner till a circular burn mark is on his face while saying, "I dont want to punish you but if i don't how will you ever learn". He releases him but and tells him to try again the goon surprisingly gets it right..

NOTE: Now this next one it really depends on what iteration of joker but I'm gonna put this around bronze/silver age era where he's less violent and psychotic and in this little thought Harley still exists yes ik she wasn't written till the 90s this is my head canon shut up also this is canon things mixed in with my headcanons so

But I imagine mid fight with one of the bat kids one of them pauses and is like joker can I ask you a question and joker is kind of like thrown off a bit and a thousand percent expects it to be a trick or sucker punched but he goes along with it and is like sure what's your question and the bat kid is like... "Soooooo your not straight right"?! And joker just fucking starts laughing then pauses and is like "kid what about my outfit makes you think ah yes that's a straight man do you think a straight man would flirt with Batman or go out of his way to arrange such lovely dates for batsy if I were straight ". And joker is absolutely laughing because this is the funniest joke he's ever heard to think anyone ever thought he was straight even harley who he was involved with for years knew this about him the moment she laid eyes on him.. the bat kid just kinda staring at him awkwardly ajd joker just is like why do you ask there's gotta be some reason for this question.. the bat kid is like uhh so then your bisexual right so like how did u know you were bisexual what were the indicators you were the first villain I kind of thought of I could ask and also the most available.. joker just pauses and is like alright I'm putting a pin in this plan and calls Harley and tells her to bring a white board and markers witch leads to an hour long lecture on the different genders and sexualities and what they all mean as well as an explanation that not everyone will be an ally

He also goes on to explain that when he was young it wasn't really a good time to be gay or bisexual so a lot of people were repressing part of themselves due to fear of what others would do to them if it got out and how the kid is lucky that the world is more accepting now then it was then he also explains that he and Harley had different experiences in that regard as they grew up in different times seeing as Harley is younger then joker

To put in perspective when Harley was a freshman in college Bruce was already three grades above her and on the cusp of graduating before dropping out

He's secretly a wine drinker

At some point he went to college and graduated with honors

He doesn't like animals views them as filthy and not worth his time

Hes neutral towards children definitely would beef with a child actually does beef with children (the batfam) I feel like he neither likes nor dislikes children like yeah he killed Jason but that was on a whim

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rendomperson · 1 month

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HOW WOULD TABLOIDS LOOK IN GOTHAM?!?

I just tough that was such a funny idea so I decided to draw it. Like Imagen just the most crazy conspiracy theorys, thresh talk, rumors...

So far I'm planning to add:

(as the main story) BRUCE WAYNE WITH A NEW KID?!? YOU WON'T BELIEVE WHO IS THE MOTHER!!! (a picture taken by paparazzi of Bruce trying to hide Damian behind himself)

THE REAL REASON WHY TIM DRAKE IS ALWAY TIRED WILL SHOCK YOU!!! (I was thinking about a picture of exosted Tim on top right)

BATMAN IS ACTUALLY JOKER? (just the text somewhere)

SHOULD YOU BECOME A GOON (just text too)

THE BIRDS ARE THE BOURGEOISIE, a deep dive in to Gotham mafia (in my head it's funny cuz it's in contrast with the rest of the lighthearted articles, also just text)

If you have any ideas on what I could/should add please let me know.

Here's my art proces for the first drawing:

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violent138 · 3 days

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You think the Batkids ever shoot awake at night, furious because they finally figured out a better witty response to the comments made by their rogue during a fight and break into Arkham/Blackgate/Belle Reve, just to let them know?

#Or is that just me #batkids #batman #batman headcanons #beyond stupid #but alas #Nobody ever accused me of having a high IQ #Batman rogues #Or I guess in Tim's case he'd have to hitch a ride to Nanda Parbat #And Dick would have to relocate to wherever Slade's most recent contract is #dc comics

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devilfic · 11 months

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sleeping headcanons about bruce/reader… need to see that man rest, or like blink for more than a second

you are so real for this

bruce would be the type of boyfriend/husband that HAS to sleep closest to the door. like if the door is facing one side of the bed, that's the side he always sleeps on. same with windows. it helps him sleep knowing that if someone were to break in, they'd have to go through him before they got to you

does not EVER wear a full set of pajamas. hasn't worn them since alfred stopped trying to force him into the little silk pjs he had as a child

he has three looks for bed: oversized band tee + ratty pajama pants, shirtless + ratty pajama pants, or briefs. just the briefs

when his hair is long, he keeps a few hair ties on his wrist to tie it up when he's washing his face before bed

("wash" is generous... he's splashing his face with cold water)

when his hair is short, he does not bother keeping it out of his face. he comes out of the bathroom with his hair dripping down his forehead and you buy him one of those cute fluffy headbands for him to use

bonus points if you get him a sanrio headband

bonus bonus points if you get him one with kuromi on it like THIS and you get a matching my melody one

he's a super light sleeper, like you could slip out of bed to use the bathroom and you'll hear him suck in a breath like "everything ok?"

this also makes him a little restless on really bad stormy nights :((

he refuses to wear earplugs or a sleeping mask because he gets very worried about being at a disadvantage in case something happens

the best you can do for him is let him curl up to your chest and let him get caught up in your heartbeat instead

him being a light sleeper also means he randomly wakes up throughout the night as soon as he has to use the toilet or gets a craving for something to eat, so be prepared for him to move around quite a bit

when he actually IS asleep tho, he does not move at all

he also doesn't naturally cuddle when he's sleepy unless he's cold, he usually is the one being cuddled

sleeptalks

this happens more often when he's got a lot on his mind (so all the time) and you'll usually hear him saying random, incoherent sentences or calling out names

it actually really embarrasses him when you tell him he does this because alfred and his roommates at boarding school used to comment on it when he was younger and he just assumed he'd grown out of it but. let's be honest. he hasn't slept with another person in the same room for years. don't know why he came to that conclusion

it's also a little rare when you catch it because he tends to fall asleep only after you do

you catch it more in the morning when he's sleeping off a long night of batmanning

it's best not to tell him if he's said anything embarrassing,,, it will literally keep him up all night

it gets a little worse when he has nightmares. you can hear him calling out joker or the riddler's name seconds before he wakes up in a cold sweat

you don't tell him exactly what you hear, but you always ask if he's ok and if he'd like to head back to bed with you or not

since he was raised by Real Brit Alfred Pennyworth, alfred did sort of imprint upon him a tea addiction

there's one particular blend that alfred swears used to put bruce out like a light when he was sick so you make that for him when he's particularly stressed and it always works wonders

speaking of him being sick. he is a COMPLETELY different sleeper when he's sick

sleeps like the dead, snores LOUDLY, cuddles like crazy

it's actually the worst because he'll be so happy to pull you in and lay his head on your shoulder but then. he drools. and the. snot. the snot.....

you can imagine that whenever he's sick, you may as well be sick too

he does have the decency to wait until you start sneezing before he gives you a nasty little cough syrup-flavored kiss like the disgusting germ gremlin he is

he won't complain about feeling bad but he will sometimes have a little delirious moment where he'll be all cute and beg you to come to bed with him because he can't sleep if you're not there next to him

like you may go sleep in one of the guest rooms until his cold passes and you'll wake up to him curled up on the loveseat on the other side of the room or even just straight up laying across the foot of the bed so he won't accidentally cough in your face

it's hard to get him to fall asleep but sometimes he pushes himself to such an extreme limit that he accidentally falls asleep anywhere

in the cave? he's passed out on his desk

working on his car? takes a quick little power nap under the engine

in the middle of a business meeting? nodding off in the chair

has fallen asleep on the floor on the WAY to bed before and when you wake him up he doesn't even realize that he never actually got there

also slipping this in here for indulgence purposes but if you've adopted dick, dick will fall asleep on bruce anywhere

like he'll see bruce conked out on the couch like a dad who insists on getting up at the ass crack of dawn and just scooch on in and fall asleep on his shoulder

even FURTHER, if you guys adopt ace, he will nap on dick

the three of them can regularly be seen napping all over the place as the years go on. thank god your bed is big enough for all four of you

having dick and the dog actually makes bruce sleep more and also more soundly because when they're sleeping on top of him it's like a weighted blanket. like if a cat fell asleep in ur lap u wouldn't get up would you? you would simply sit there and rot. same thing with bruce

last thought but I also think as bruce gets older, he's going to fall asleep more often and that will result in a lot of conversations that go like this

bruce: that was a good movie

you: you fell asleep halfway through

bruce: I was resting my eyes

you: I paused the movie and you didn't even react

bruce: I was watching the movie

you: so who died at the end?

bruce: the villain

you: no one died at the end!!! we were watching paddington 2!!!!

but also somehow hears you if you make fun of him in his vicinity. you put a phone in this man's face to take a picture of him sleeping and when you go to look at the photo you see his eyes open like this

jumpscare warning: robert

taglist: @yikes-buddy @alexxavicry @theclassicvinyldragon @angxlictexrs @moonlightreader649 @geekyfer @thescarletfang @navs-bhat

#bruce wayne x reader #bruce wayne headcanons #bruce wayne scenarios #bruce wayne fluff #bruce wayne fic #bruce wayne #batman x reader #batman headcanons #batman scenarios #batman fluff #batman fic #the batman #battinson x reader #battinson #dc #mjwrites

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jar-of-something-else · 8 months

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Ectoplasm's Kinktober Prompt List 2023

Just a disclaimer: I AM TURNING 18 IN OCTOBER!!! If you are under 18, please don't interact with my posts on this blog! My main blog, @jar-of-ectoplasm, is the place for you to freely interact with everything! If you are a minor and have your age in your bio, I will ask you to please not follow this account; thank you for understanding!!

Everything will be under the cut, certain prompts I haven't assigned characters to yet but you guys are free to request certain characters for certain prompts and I'll take those into account!!

I will be doing this in the form of headcanons, with two characters per prompt (with some exceptions)! Any day with an asterisk (* <this thing for those who don't know) i need characters for!

I'm pulling inspiration from several different prompt lists, but this is is an original list!

I am going to try to do everyday of this, but please don't be surprised if I don't, I have a lot of stuff going on in October this year!

Prompts and characters are under the cut!

Day 1: Threesome w/ Coop and Remer from BASEketball and Sniper and Scout from Team Fortress 2

Day 2: Medical/Lab kink w/ Medic from Team Fortress 2 and Jonathan Crane (Scarecrow) from Batman

*Day 3: Mirror sex w/ Illuso from Jojo's Bizarre Adventure and a requested character!

Day 4: Accent kink w/ Tex Sawyer from Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3 and Sniper from Team Fortress 2

Day 5: Strap-on w/ Ms. Pauling and Zhanna from Team Fortress 2

Day 6: Temperature play w/ Ghiaccio from Jojo's Bizarre Adventure, Pyro from Team Fortress 2, and Victor Fries (Mr. Freeze) from Batman

Day 7: Sensory Deprivation w/ Demoman from Team Fortress 2 and Edward Nygma (The Riddler) from Batman

Day 8: Fearplay w/ Billy Loomis from Scream and Leslie Vernon from Behind the Mask

Day 9: Language kink w/ Spy from Team Fortress 2 and Eduardo Dorrance (Bane) from Batman

*Day 10: Bloodplay w/ Risotto Nero from Jojo's Bizarre Adventure and Sniper from Team Fortress 2 (but he's crazy!!)

Day 11: Size kink w/ Heavy from Team Fortress 2 and Formaggio from Jojo's Bizarre Adventure

Day 12: Work sex w/ Egon Spengler, Ray Stanz, Peter Venkman, Winston Zeddemore and Janine Melnitz from The Ghostbusters

*Day 13: Sex pollen w/ Pamela Isley (Poison Ivy) from Batman and a requested character!

Day 14: Body worship w/ Vincent Sinclair from House of Wax and Melone from Jojo's Bizarre Adventure

Day 15: Degradation w/ Harvey Dent (Two Face) from Batman and Herbert West from Re-Animator

Day 16: Professor/Student (PURELY CONSENSUAL, BOTH PARTIES 18+) w/ Egon Spengler from Ghostbusters and Engineer from Team Fortress 2

Day 17: Dirty talk w/ Prosciutto from Jojo's Bizarre Adventure and Stu Macher from Scream

Day 18: Dumbification w/ Bo Sinclair from House of Wax and Sellout!Remer from BASEketball

Day 19: Praise kink w/ Ray Stanz from The Ghostbusters, Coop from BASEketball, and Engineer from Team Fortress 2

Day 20: Volume control w/ Harleen Quinzel (Harley Quinn) from Batman and Spy from Team Fortress 2

Day 21: Public sex w/ Randy Meeks from Scream and Scout from Team Fortress 2

Day 22: Face sitting w/ Melone from Jojo's Bizarre Adventure and Peter Venkman from The Ghostbusters

Day 23: Hypnosis w/ Jervis Tetch (The Mad Hatter) and Dennis Prowell (The Music Meister) from Batman

Day 24: Mask kink w/ Adrian Chase (Vigilante) from Peacemaker and Pyro from Team Fortress 2

*Day 25: Predator/Prey w/ Tex Sawyer from Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3 and a requested character!

Day 26: Teasing w/ Remer from BASEketball and Leslie Vernon from Behind the Mask

Day 27: Manhandling w/ Chris Smith (Peacemaker) from Peacemaker/The Suicide Squad and Soldier from Team Fortress 2

Day 28: Passionate/Loving sex w/ Winston Zeddemore from Ghostbusters and Abner Krill from The Suicide Squad

*Day 29: Food play w/ Engineer from Team Fortress 2 and a requested character!

Day 30: Lingerie w/ Melone from Jojo's Bizarre Adventure and Ms. Pauling from Team Fortress 2

*Day 31: Costume sex w/ Selina Kyle (Catwoman) from Batman and a requested character!

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luminescentauthor · 9 months

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yknow something that i think would be really funny is like... most of Gotham and also the extended superhero community thinks Red Hood is roughly Nightwing's age or a little older, because why would you assume the crime boss that cut off a bunch of mobster's heads is nineteen????

so I want to see the exact moment when someone asks Jason how old he is and he replies honestly without really thinking about it and then someone does the math and realizes that when he first showed up he was literally nineteen

and for those who know he was Robin, this tracks, but I don't think that's common knowledge even in the superhero community unless you know the Batfam personally. everyone who didn't know is flabbergasted. Gotham realizes that the crazy bastard that managed to take over all of Gotham's organized crime in a week flat and give The Actual Literal Batman a run for his money was NINETEEN. it's the only thing the press talks about for a solid week. Bruce has gotten at least three dozen messages from various superheroes who don't know Jason was Robin, all asking what on earth is up with Hood.

Jason gets asked about it at some point. He shrugs and says "guess I'm just built different"

#dc #dc comics #batman comics #batman headcanon #batman headcanons #batfam headcanon #batfam headcanons #batman #jason todd #red hood

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alienguts · 2 years

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Celebrating Your Wedding Anniversary (Bruce Wayne x GN!Reader HCs)

Warnings: mostly fluff, mentions of spicier things

Request?: No

A/N: My head is currently full of wool so I didn't know that yesterday was Batman Day until today.

With everything that he has on his plate (Wayne Enterprises, Batmanning, being a public figure, having a small army of adopted kids) you'd think that Bruce would completely forget your anniversary.

It has happened once or twice and he was so apologetic and spent a whole week making it up to you, but he makes sure that it doesn't happen anymore.

On the morning of your anniversary, he wakes you up as slowly as possible with plenty of hugs and kisses.

The feeling of his lips on your shoulders and your neck rouses you and you immediately turn over in his arms to return the gestures.

Does it lead to incredible morning sex? That's up to you, but it's highly likely that it does.

Bruce is a spectacularly terrible cook so don't expect him to bring you breakfast in bed.

If he does want to bring you breakfast, Alfred will have made it instead. Bruce just makes a very pretty waiter.

Flowers are a must. He buys you the biggest bouquet of your favourite flowers (among other things).

Even if you're not a gift kind of person, he insists on getting you something.

Bruce, of course, doesn't want anything. He has everything he could want, and just having your love is enough for him.

Your wedding anniversary is strictly a No Batman Day. You live in Gotham City, so bad things are going to happen out there, but the Batkids have more than enough experience on their hands to take care of things.

You could go out for dinner, but Bruce's celebrity status can make that pretty difficult. There are people out to get him, and people who are jealous of you so unless you somehow get a table somewhere private, you're going to be disturbed throughout the night.

Dinner at home is just as good since Alfred could make buttered toast taste like a gourmet meal. He's happy to cook for the two of you since he's happy that you made his son happy.

What you do for the rest of the night is never planned.

You could go for a walk around the grounds, cuddle up on the couch, or just immediately tumble into bed and stay there until the morning.

Bruce will never get enough time to spend with you as he wants, so he always wants this day to be special for you.

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bigfan-fanfic · 10 months

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Why Don't You Take a Seat? (Batdad Fanfic)

a one shot where batdad meets ra's al ghul for the first time and they have tea together, talk while waiting for bruce to arrive

"Please, Mr. Wayne. Have a seat." the strange man says.

It's bad enough that all your camera feeds have gone dark, the last you heard over comms from your family being the sounds of combat with mysterious assassins.

"It's not generally customary for the guest to offer a seat to his host." you respond, causing the man to chuckle.

"That is certainly true. And in the same vein, not customary for the host to not know whom his guest may be. I am Ra's al Ghul."

You freeze, the name making your blood run cold.

He... looks far too young to be the same man that taught your husband back when he was training, but it wasn't like people would be scrambling to use the name of the Demon's Head.

"And you know my name, it seems."

"Of course. We have been watching you with great interest."

"That's news to me." you say, thanking your lucky stars that Alfred isn't here tonight - so that if you do end up dying, at least your boys will have a caretaker.

A few more assassins in dark clothing emerge from the shadows, setting up a tea service before vanishing. Seeing no other recourse, you sit across from him, watching as he pours your tea.

"You of course know I am well-acquainted with your husband?"

"Of course." you say, sipping at the delightful porcelain cup. "Though it would seem your daughter would prefer to better acquainted with him."

"I do apologize for Talia. She seems to think I would favor her more were she to produce a fitting heir."

"A fitting heir?

"Archaic terminology, to be sure. Successor would be the better word. For many a year now, I have entreated your husband to be my successor, though his unwillingness to kill makes him... ill-suited."

"And so Talia..."

"Believes that should she and Bruce form a union, they may together bear a child that inherits both of their-"

"That's... not how having kids works."

"Indeed. I personally prefer that my successor show their worth through deed rather than breeding."

"So...may I ask why you've been watching me?"

"Of course. You see, the League of Shadows often examines civilization - which parts of it are worth sparing, and which parts have become too corrupted, too fallen, and must be purged. Gotham is one such city."

You balk at the idea of the League having so much power - more than Bruce had estimated when he told you about them.

"It was Thomas and Martha Wayne who, nigh-singlehandedly, kept this city afloat among the iniquity and vice of its underbelly. When they were murdered, we assumed the hope of the city had been slaughtered with them."

"But who should arrive on the scene but a young upstart with no other connection to Gotham high society but his bosom friendship and young romance with its de facto prince? You, my dear Mr. Wayne, took charge of this city and became its champion. Even among the cesspool of calumny and disdain, you have lit a beacon of truth. The last bastion of such things."

"That can't be true. I'm not the only one doing things to help." you protest. Ra's smirks indulgently, like an uncle tutting at the presumptive modesty of a favorite nephew.

"You refer to your husband?"

"Not solely. There are others trying to make a difference. Like Dr. Thompkins or Commissioner Gordon."

"And yet you are the most notable, and not only does your wealth make you the most powerful, your intellect and tactical mind makes you the one most charged to affect change. I say your wealth, and not your husband's wealth, because as I know it, you have your own standing as CEO of Wayne Enterprises as well as the Wayne fortune."

"You have been doing your research."

"Indeed. The League is no simple assassins' guild, my dear. We guide the direction of the world, in what we hope to be a favorable direction. I have been remiss in the past century, allowing the world to languor this way, what with its global warming and its wars of convenience and profit. I have intended to change it through drastic action, but... you have intrigued me. Perhaps there are... other ways. No great man truly wishes to end the life of another, and should it be rendered unnecessary, our sword can be stayed."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean... your way. Gotham has seen a marked turn under your direction and manipulation. Perhaps not an instant one, but a noticeable one. To us, a favorable one."

"So you're saying that Gotham's survival is... totally dependent on me?"

"For now, yes. But that may change. The reason I sent Talia to distract your husband is because I wished to get the measure of you for myself. I admit, I once considered you nothing more than an emotional chain tethering Bruce to foolish sentimentality, but I came to appreciate your tactic. Far less brutal, and one I will also admit I dismissed. I have held a sword for so long, I forgot the utility of other tools."

"So... you want to work with me?" you frown, tilting your head.

"Indeed. We have much to learn from each other, and with the combination of our approaches, we may find a greater progress than we would in conflict."

"Combination of our approaches? You mean killing people?"

"You cannot deny it would be expedient."

"Even if I accepted that, it'd be the wrong approach, even practically! Just killing the people that stand in our way would create chaos, AND it wouldn't guarantee change the way systemic reform would!"

"See why you would be invaluable?" Ra's grins, unperturbed. "However, one could argue that your systemic reform could be hastened by removing those that would prove obstacles to it."

"Or it could jeopardize the movement by giving the opposition martyrs."

"Ha!" Ra's barks out a laugh of genuine delight. "You remind me of someone I once knew. She would never let my mind rest for a moment when she disagreed with me, nor would she let me hide behind pretty words or turns of phrase."

"Sounds like you need someone like that around you." You chuckle, and Ra's smirks in agreement.

"Indeed I do. Will you join the League of Shadows?"

"I hope this isn't the kind of offer that's only got one answer."

"For once, I will accept either answer. A 'no' now may become a 'yes' in the future."

"Then I shall take some time to consider."

"Indeed. I believe your husband is about to join us anyway..."

Ra's seemed a sensible, charming man when you first met him, but it was impossible to ignore how menacing he could be - how many atrocities he had already committed and planned to commit.

Indeed, though he allowed Talia to continue pursuing Bruce, it seemed he tried just as hard to woo you to his side.

In any case, it was never going to be the last time the al Ghul family became a part of your life...

#batdad x bruce #batdad reader #batman headcanons #headcanons #dc headcanons

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