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#baby's first police state experience
shiftythrifting · 2 years
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Prepare children for the horrors of the surveillance state with this handy dystopian device. Found in Cancer Research UK, London
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gremlingottoosilly · 23 days
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Girlfailure reader x incel König continuation pleaseeeee
I need to know what happens after he shows up at her door. How did he get her address? What were his intentions? What are HER intentions of letting him in? Are they now a couple? Will he baby trap her????? Am I getting too invested? yes.
Lovely writing dearest, hope you’re doing well.
Oh, getting your address was the easy part. He had friends in places - and it's not like you were smart enough to move out from the first time he sent you a gift. You enjoyed the attention, with him being the first guy to ever look at you in a romantic sense...poor, dumb little you - you should have called the police after the first flower bouquet embraced with a very fancy lingerie covered in dried cum. Instead, you simply washed it and wear it after a few days. God, you seriously deserve each other. You...well, you let him in because you were lonely. You didn't want to be left alone, you enjoyed being his obsession - especially since he was willing to send you money for the smallest stuff and almost eliminated your need to work. You thought to yourself that even if he is ugly as fuck and actually 50 years old, you could work with it - you can pretend it's your prince, you can pretend that the first guy to look at you romantically wouldn't have some weird intentions. It's absolutely dumb but, when he first arrived at your doorstep, you let him in. He is tall, bulky, you wouldn't be able to fight him even if you wanted to...but you don't want to, and this is the problem. You invite him to your house, he pronounces some dumb joke about finally meeting his online goddess and you apologise for the state of the room. You weren't exacty cleaning the last fe days, but he just pushes piles of clothes away and smiles as you look a bit too embarrassed. God, you are fucking adorable - Konig wants to kiss you, but you both are too awkward to initiate. He ends up sleeping at your couch because it's too late to drive and he wants to steal as much of your stuff as possible. You let him take your favorite shirts and he promises to kidnap you as soon as he prepares a room - this is all feels surrealistic, but you put your head on his shoulder and ask if he has other girls. He doesn't. You ask if you would be able to work and he says that you won't have to. He shows you his bank account, he talks about guns, he doesn't touch you despite putting you on his lap, and this is the most absurd, arousing experience you had in your entire life. you are a couple now. A bit dysfunctional, but...yeah, you make it work. Somehow.
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Your Biker in Worn Leather Part 2
Pairing: EZ Reyes x female!reader
Category: Angst
Word count: 396
Summary: You finally tell EZ who’s responsible for your current appearance.
Warnings: None
Disclaimer: I have no idea if the Burning Souls are a real MC, it’s just a made up name for this fic. If they are real, this is in no way, shape, or form related to them and for entertainment purposes only.
Part 1
Masterlist
Taglist
Gif is not mine. Credit to the owner
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EZ’s voice rang in your ears. Who did this to you? You knew the man Ezekiel would become once you told him the name. That version of EZ was terrifying to you despite his lividness never being aimed at you but others instead.
“Baby, who was it?” The biker asked once again in a softer tone, concerned filled eyes never leaving your face.
You swallowed hard. “Burning Souls.” You couldn’t bring yourself to look into EZ’s eyes. The fire that resided there was frightening and anyone in their right mind would run for the hills when met with the intense anger that bubbled up in the Mayan.
The Burning Souls were relatively new to the scene, being made up by men discharged from various branches of the armed forces and former police officers. They used all their skills, experience, and resources to their advantage to strike fear into anyone and everyone who crossed their path. What was their motivation? Their goal? Easy. To destroy all MCs in the state of California. To cause chaos, destruction, havoc and if people died in the process, that made it even better.
The Burning Souls had been scoping out the Mayans for a few weeks now. They had watched each Mayan through town and ultimately followed them to the clubhouse’s run down walled gate.
When the Burning Souls first saw you they didn’t think much of you, thinking you were just a club hang around and only there for fun and sex. That opinion of you was proven wrong when they kept seeing you with the Mayans’ Vice President, Ezekiel Reyes. The hugs and kisses exchanged between you and EZ told the story of love. Now the Burning Souls had what they needed — a weakness. A weakness to the VP. It was as close to the top as they were going to get since Obispo Losa showed no interest in love or affection but rather just sex. With no ammo to use on the Mayans’ President, the VP was next in line.
As soon as the MC’s name left your lips, EZ’s jaw tightened, fists clenched, his anger rose and rose with each passing second.
No one harms, much less touches his girl. Most importantly, no one lives to tell the tale.
Ezekiel Reyes was about to start a war ten times worse than the entire world has ever seen.
General Taglist: @kmc1989
EZ Reyes Taglist: @zaenight
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maxxphoenixv1 · 6 months
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Maxxbomb #1 aka Maxxtendo Direct
Welcome the the first of what'll be hopefully many MAXXBOMBS. This is where I fit my unique content into a convenient package. Meet Kazari, The Reincarnation of Shadow Weaver
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Kazari is a special She-Ra OC I created, sort of out of spite, but I really love her, like my own baby, which is ironic because I'm never having kids. Kazari has the ability to control HAVOK MAGIC, a powerful form of magic, imagine HAMON from Jojo's Bizarre Adventure mixed with ONE FOR ALL from My Hero Academia. Kazari is ruthless, mischievous, a trickster and kind of a raging b****canoe when she wants to be, but ultimately with a heart of gold. Also, she's dating Finn.
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The two actually got together at Princess Prom. My friend, Luna actually designed her Prom Dress
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The story is currently incomplete, but you can ready it on AO3
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On the subject of She-Ra... I've actually made something really special for Catradora stans and Shadow Weaver Antis
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Here are the link to the AO3 -> LINK
Further more, I am writing a sequel, here is the plot synopsis -> "In the aftermath of a harrowing school shooting that rips through Etheria High, Police Chief Mara grapples with the daunting task of unraveling the enigmatic threads that bind together a web of online fandoms, veiled secrets, and the haunting repercussions that reverberate through the shattered lives of survivors. As the community struggles to come to terms with the devastating event, an unsettling online phenomena begins threatens corrupt and distort the city and all that Mara holds dear!"
-> LINK
Winx: Mystic Crusaders
I'm also writing a spin-off for Roxy. It's called Winx: Mystic Crusaders. Ever since the battle against the Wizards of the Black Circle, things have not been exactly easy for Roxy, as it turns out, going through what she'd been through is pretty traumatic. Things become complicated when the Winx go missing. Now, Roxy has set out to rescue them, but she can't do it alone, so now, she must gather up a team of fairies, witches and specialists to save to day and bring back peace. Together, they are the MYSTIC CRUSADERS. And here is the logo
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You can read this story, live on AO3 ->
While we're on the subject of Roxy. I've always made the case that Roxy was the Gohan of Winx Club
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To that end, I made a special transformation of Roxy... KIDEMIX
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Kidemix, the culmination of Roxy's evolution, rises above the usual metamorphoses triggered by tasks or quests. It materializes as a manifestation of unparalleled pressure and trauma, akin to a dormant volcano violently erupting or a cornered, wounded creature lashing out in desperation. Unlike other transformations, Kidemix surges forth in direct response to the malevolence and injustices heaped upon the user and their cherished ones, channeling a primal force to confront and annihilate profound evil. It becomes a vivid representation of innocence irretrievably lost in the face of adversity.
To attain Kidemix, Earth Fairies follow a straightforward set of criteria:
Possessing a Pure Heart: Kidemix's essence lies in the unwavering purity of the fairy's heart, a prerequisite that distinguishes it from mere magical achievements.
Amassing a Colossal Quantity of Power: In stark contrast to conventional power-ups, Kidemix demands the accumulation of an extraordinary reservoir of energy. For Roxy, this involved acquiring Aquatix, a power source potentially 15 times more potent than the formidable Sirenix.
Experiencing an Intense Emotional Trigger: Kidemix awakens in response to an overwhelming surge of emotions, triggered by profound experiences. This emotional catalyst propels the fairy into a transformative state of power and resilience.
The abilities bestowed by Kidemix extend beyond a mere power boost; they push the user's capabilities beyond their logical conclusion. Roxy, as the Fairy of Animals, gains the extraordinary ability to adopt the traits of any creature in existence. Kidemix, in essence, propels the user's abilities to an unprecedented zenith.
Notably, the user's size increases to nearly double its original.
Just as Spider-Man possesses the formidable black suit, and Teen Gohan achieves Super Saiyan 2, Roxy's Kidemix stands as her ultimate transformation, showcasing her strength and resilience in the face of adversity.
Kidemix, however, is not a power easily harnessed. It carries a wild and savage essence, needing to be tamed and mastered. Like a tempest, it can be uncontrollable, requiring the user to forge a deep connection and understanding to guide its formidable power. But what about you? How would your OCs Kidemix work? Or the other Winx? Tell me using the #WinxKidemix. BTW, the art was done by Poison the Cat on IG
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not to put too fine a point on it but I think the other reason that Americans don't protest like in other countries (the first reason being "we live in a fascist police state") is that violence just... isn't the same kind of threat as it is in other countries. like, we live in a society where threatening to murder people for petty reasons is 100% normal and often a significant part of someone's political ideology. it's a significant part of our culture in a way that it's not in other countries, so we do it all the damn time.
"molon labe" is a common bumper sticker. "guns don't kill people, dads with pretty daughters kill people" is a funny T-shirt slogan. you can buy targets for practice that have the faces of politicians on them and then shoot them for fun. violence is just such an ingrained part of discourse here, political or otherwise, that it's stopped being surprising. it's just background radiation at this point. it's like threatening the parents of a toddler by saying you'll make them listen to "baby shark" on repeat if they don't comply with your demands: like, yes, that would be awful, but you're threatening them with something they already experience constantly all the time.
"make politicians fear for their lives!" my buddy, my dude, I get you, I understand, but that's basically just a Tuesday here.
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technologyculturedneo · 7 months
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SOS: Poison In My Mind (Pt 1)
PLAYING NOW: Season 2 of SOS: AM I ALIVE
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“We met in the worst circumstance possible, but yet, even if we had to meet in different circumstances, I’d still fall for you.”
SUMMARY. A series of events following the aftermath of the break in/hostage situation has everyone feeling tense. The Zhong family is torn with disappoints, from Yezi deciding that she wants to keep the rape baby, to Dae leaving the family wanting something else from her life. With months and years treading by, the family is met again in uncanny situations with the same old boys who can’t seem to get away from them.
PAIRING(s). Delinquent!Mark, Felony!Haechan, Boyfriend!Jeno, Brother!Renjun; Policeman!Jaemin, Jisung; Husband!Chenle, Boyfriend!Jaehyun X OC Dae, Yezi (original character)
GENRE. Angst. Longshot. Slow burn. Crime. Strangers to lovers. Smut (non-consensual/consensual). Family.
WARNINGS. Drugs abuse (Alcohol, smoking, marijuana, cocaine, heroin). Sexual content (consensual, child abuse, pedophile). Slow burn (unlike the first book filled with edge and action, here’s a more toned down and summary filled action after the aftermath, lots of convo.)
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S2: EP1-7 The moment the judge hits the gavel, Dae unknowingly lets out a sigh of relief. Laying her head against her dad's shoulder, some tears pouring out of her eyes causing her to hiccup, sniff and fall into a breaking emotional state. Her dad, Chenle hugs her tightly. He feels such an overwhelming amount of pain. He doesn't even know what to say when he watches the police handcuff the boys and makes them line up against the opposite doors, preparing them for their new prison life.
Dae gets her head off his shoulder and with her eyes smudged in tears and nose running just as badly, her face red and voice barely above a whisper. "Dad, I can't breathe," She hiccups terribly struggling to say.
Chenle is attentive and assists her up as he navigates her outside of the Court room. With his arms around her shoulder, he walks with her steadily and his eyes peer around trying to find a specific door, which was right next to the court room. Entering into the room whereby his wife and Yezi are, his heart grows heavy upon seeing Yezi in a similar dreadful position crying her soul out.
Yezi upon seeing her dad gets up as well and runs into her dad's arms. Chenle holds tight, embracing them generously the same way when they cried that he and his ex-wife were splitting. His lips kiss the top of their precious heads just as his eyes shut by the overflow of tears bluring his vision. His daughters sadly crying only causes his heart more pain that as their father he couldn't protect them against the evil of the world. Chungdae, Chenle's wife gets up slowly and makes her way towards her family. She moves behind Chenle and back hugs him, her own tears building up.
Yezi and Dae stretch their arms in sync backwards to wrap around Chungdae. No matter how much she was reminded of being their step mum, no matter how much she fought with Yezi, no matter how much Dae was nice to her without actually allowing her to know her real feelings, and no matter how much Chenle tried to always make her feel a part of his family even though deep down she knew she had a long way to acceptance with the whole family, right now being here with them somehow feels like a new level of depth.
The fact that she cut her trip half way- once her plane landed and Chenle called her to tell her the details she booked the next flight back- and came to serve as support for the girls as well as her husband who continuously blamed himself. It's like she had unlocked a new sacred bound with each and every one of them- although it was because of a traumatic experience, she’s somehow happy to feel included in their suffering of the moment.
Chenle loved his kids, and as Chungdae loved his kids as her own only made him love her more. And right now, as Chenle has all the loves of his life around him- it only tears him down more. If only this was a much pleasant occasion instead of a horrifying one.
Meanwhile, in the courtroom similar feelings and emotions are being done. However, it's only directed at Renjun and his mum.
Renjun is an incoherent speechless dreadful mess as he’s plunged in tears. He wants to shout and cry out loud but he can't even express his overwhelming pain as his own physical state hurts him with every move he makes causing him so much discomfort. All he does is sink his head into his mother's shoulders and shudders as the tears furiously plunge out of his one good eye.
His mother with immense loving arms tightens her embrace- shielding him from the emotions of right now. Her scent sips into his nostrils and despite the ache, he appreciates this comfort which in all his life has always sought out for. The sincere and dear love of his mother. Her heart shreds due to how she failed to protect her son from the boy she gave birth to. Her eyes have sprinkles of water, and her head throbbing with the new forming headache from holding in a load amount of tears. From the moment she took in this lost little Chinese boy as her own son, for the first time in her dark miserable life she could say that she had hope. To see her hope of a son bearing his soul out for a crime he did not commit, stains her soul of feeling like a failure again. She failed with her first son. But right now, she didn’t want it to be the case of her second son. And so she holds in her voice of agony, of pain and whispers with strength. "You're going to be alright okay? I'm not mad at you. You did what was right and I swear it’ll all pay back some day. It looks dark now, but I promise you Renji that…everything will work out.” Her eyes let out some tears before she sniffs. “I promise that I’ll be waiting for you when you come out. Don't be scared my boy, be brave in there. Don’t let them break you. You are my hope and I know this world doesn’t deserve you, but come back to me in one piece okay? I love you so much Renji, so so much you have no idea. Just stay strong for me okay?"
“Okay,” Renjun hiccups out trying to hold it in but the devastation is too much to bear.
Standing in line behind Mark, Donghyuck watches vulnerably.
It pains and even hurts to see his mum in tears and wrapping all her love upon Renjun. Even when the guards break them apart and Renjun gets back in line behind him, he prepares himself for the hug that he knows his mum always gives. He's expecting for his mum's love and attention, even though she might be angry at him, Donghyuck knows that she always gave the best hugs of comfort.
But when she looks at him…
Donghyuck is only able to make out the look of humiliation. Disappointment. And so much sadness as though she’s failed with him. In her eyes that were so full of adoration and affection for Renjun, he gets her capital look of sadness as she covers her mouth and closes her eyes filled with tears and turns away.
Donghyuck sucks in a sharp breath, his glossy eyes stinging from how much tears he's holding back. He gets pushed out of the court room by the police and he follows them to a waiting room. Upon waiting they get taken in for their final prints. Still with cuffs around his wrists, he’s aggressively assisted in getting his finger prints inked and pressed on paper. He does his signature, gets a court mug shot and then initially given a see through plastic bag of a blue standard prison uniform. Mark gets the same color.
Yet, upon seeing Renjun walk out of the prints room with a bag of orange prison clothes… he can't hold in his tears. Renjun sits on the other side of the hallway but still in front of Donghyuck, when he sees that his older brother’s shoulders are sagged so low and he hears sounds of anguish, sounds of agony, does his heart remind him of how much he’s put up with Donghyuck. All he wanted was to be his brother’s friend and getting to know his brother. Unfortunately, trying to get to know his brother would mean becoming him and that’s not something Renjun ever wants again. And so, also silently he weeps again out of his one good eye.
Meanwhile Jeno and Mark have such emotionless looks towards one another. Unlike the other bags, Jeno’s see through bag had a green prison uniform. Mark is so distorted to reality and unfazed with his brother that when Jeno gets ushered out by a new guard he finds himself speaking. “Good luck bro,”
Jeno, in his own unfazed and worn-out actuality mummers. “You too.”
In honesty, for Jeno everything was one big blur. The fact that it was night and he was in the car with his brother, to somehow him waking up in a hospital 3 weeks later with minor burn patches just chaotically threw him off everything he knew as reality. And then he hears that he’s being charged with breaking and entering into a wealthy mansion. It’s the most absurd nightmare he’s ever woken up from- everything was one big drunken blur of memories popping up here and there, but he has no recollection of actually living in those memories. To say he was beyond confused was an understatement. He was just numb yet puzzled that all this happened. All he remembers is being drunk and waking up in a hospital bed weeks later.
The one thing he can remember lividly, was when he entered into the girl that he has admired, when he entered her room and saw his brother forcing her to mouth fuck his crotch- that felt like something he would never ever be able to forget. That is a spare moment that he can’t get out his head. So walking into a prison statement with the least amount of knowledge of why he’s being sentenced, Jeno sucks it up and follows.
Donghyuck can’t stop crying at this point. Even if his voice is low, Renjun and Mark can hear it. Although it’s awkward for Mark, for Renjun it’s a painful and pitiful reality that shit hits hard. Donghyuck’s eyes are shut, as painful reminders of how he not only disappointed his mother and brother, but he also proved Yezi’s words to be true. The words of her telling him how worthless he is. Because truly, he feels like a worthless, filthy, cheap, vain, unlucky, useless, pathetic, miserable and pain for his whole family.
Donghyuck is in tears and can't even say anything when they take Renjun away to his respective bus leading to the county jail center. Renjun can't even say anything when seeing Donghyuck's head hung so low as his shoulders shake and light sounds of grief in emotions are heard from him. In fact, in this moment where he looks at his brother…there’s a slight mounting anger of how he should’ve never tried so hard to get his approval in anything. Donghyuck never ever cared about him. And as he leaves the court and gets into his bus, a slowly fueling hatred grows in him.
It’s only left Donghyuck and Mark in the corridor as they wait for the arrival of their bus that would probably be filled with returning criminals going back to the same prison. At this point, Donghyuck knew the cycle all too well.
He knew that there would be new second time offenders, old gang cliques who committed hard crimes, gang members who’re coming in to deliver a message to one of their old boys in prison, crime offenders who somehow always get away with petty charges instead of life sentences and lastly the guys who had nowhere else to go but prison…and so committing a petty crime to be charged at least 5 years would satisfy their life- these were the people that Donghyuck knew were going to be with him. Donghyuck knew of the type of people he’d see again, and how ecstatic they’d be to see him. Prison life was his home. The only home that welcomed him with open arms every time, with ‘friends’, people who protected him, the officers who alarmingly treated him ‘well’ and the all-time shelter and food that was provided to him each and every day.
If anything, he should’ve been happy to be going back to a place of ‘rest’, but there’s a weight on his chest that’s anchoring him down, there’s a heavy burden on his shoulders that’s sinking him. The fact that it’s not a thought but it’s now his reality. He always joked that one of these days he’d come back as a rapist, but now the dawning weight of his reality sets him in such a dark hole. He has added onto his record something that once hurt his mother. He has added onto his record a pain that’s deep and unfathomable, something that would define him as an ‘experienced criminal’. Donghyuck shudders and blurts out another cry as he sinks his head in between his hands. His own mother couldn’t even stand to look at him. Donghyuck feels so shut out right now. Enraged at himself for being such a fuck up. He can’t believe that he crossed over to a side he’d never thought himself of crossing.
When he feels the harsh hand of the guard, he knows that this time as he’s going to prison it won’t be the usual years of rest, but instead a commencement time of guilt and punishment. He deserved punishment for all that he’s put his family through. For all that he’s put everyone that he has hurt through.
He sucks up his tears but keeps his head down with his jaws locked. Unlike getting in the bus and always going to the back and greeting the old timers who joyously call unto his name- he takes the front seat close to the window. Mark, not obliged to follow, feels in him that his partner in crime isn’t himself and so he takes a seat next to him after acknowledging some of the returning inmates. Mark seated beside Donghyuck feels uncomfortable but can only endure it. Donghyuck has his head against the window his head pining on him. It doesn't sit right with Mark and all he can do is lay his hand upon the ladders shoulder. He had no words because he didn’t understand why he was moping.
Donghyuck can't take his eyes off his mum as she stands outside waving her hand towards Renjun's bus. She's crying, holding onto some tissue papers and looking defeated. Donghyuck's eyes sting when he sees her crouching down still in tears.
She used to look at him like that. She'd cry for him like that. But now she can't even stand to look at him.
As the bus begins moving out the court parking, Donghyuck’s eyes unconsciously catches onto the news crews and reports all withering and surrounding the court as they try to get to the ‘Zhong’ family. His eyes don’t mean to, but they go to the girls who are rushed into such a high class, superior and posh maroon looking car.
It all started with a car, an envious yet spiteful car that seemed in hands reach and just for him. A car that was a whole Pandora’s box. If only Donghyuck could go back in time, to the time that stupid spoilt car carrying those fucking high social brats passed his own rusty faded red car, if only he could go back and peal his eyes off that car and to his brother who only wanted to go home. He would’ve never lusted over the car if he knew what he knew. He would turn to his brother and agree to just take him home- far away from the lives of the rich people. Far away from the life of chaos. And far away from the life he was living.
After a decent and mouth sovereign dinner in a luxurious five-star restaurant, Chenle and his family quietly went back to their respective rental guarded home whereby their new life would begin.
Sitting around the living room, Chenle explains that the insurance company that insured their house will finish in about a month's time. But he wanted to know whether or not they felt safe moving back into that neighborhood or wanted a new place.
It's basically nonnegotiable for them all as they all want a change of scenery. Ever since the incident, the Zhong family were the communities most talked about family for (not only) the outrageous verdicts that the boys got, but also for how 4 lowlifes managed to break into such a secured residential area and well-guarded home. Few of the neighboring families moved out immediately, while others were already preparing to move out, most enhanced their security, so it only made sense that the people in the area didn't feel safe and were contemplating on leaving or staying.
"Another thing we need to address," Chungdae starts, laying her hand on Chenle’s knee, sensing his hesitancy. "Yezi,"
"Yes?" Yezi nervously squeezes Dae’s hand having an idea of what the conversation would be about.
Chungdae silently sighs looking at Chenle before focusing her attention on her step daughter, who had sadly and traumatically become pregnant but had said nothing ever since the confirmation at the hospital. "It's been a month and some days since you've been pregnant-"
"I know." She counts the days every day. "Can we not talk about-"
"And every time we bring it up you try to turn it down. Chungdae has got some pills you can take now to neutralize the thing moving in your stomach. Tomorrow is Wednesday and we’re taking you to the hospital to get it removed." This time Chenle speaks, his voice not too welcoming as if he has an idea of what his 16-year-old daughter is thinking. "If you're thinking about keeping it you can forget it."
Yezi's head strikes up at her dad with wide saddened eyes. She sits on the edge of her seat with prompt and firm lips. But the thing that speaks most to Chenle is the look of fortitude, of resilience of some sort of willpower. "Dad-"
"Absolutely not.” Chenle springs back in distaste of high disgust. “Not in my house. You are not-”
“Dad you didn’t even give me a chance to speak-”
“Speak about what?” Chenle’s got his eyes bulging out of his socket. “This is not a discussion we’re having. You’re going to remove-”
“No!” Yezi suddenly cries back and gulps back holding in her tears.
“You can't tell me you've been seriously thinking of keeping that damned thing-"
"Dad-"
“Yezi that’s enough!” Chenle never yells, but when he does it catches everyone off guard. “Have you gone stupid?”
“Honey-”
“No have you gone mad? Retarded maybe? Yezi this is not up for discussion. You will not have that thing grow in you!”
“Why? It’s my-”
“Have you fucking gone retarded-”
“Dad this is my child!” It takes Chungdae holding Chenle back by his arm when he shoots up from the couch, while Dae holds tightly onto Yezi’s hand when Yezi bursts out in franticness. The tears now streaming out. “I’m not going to remove it. It’s mine.”
“Yezi,” Chenle and Chungdae both call out in a morphed sadness filled with disappointment.
"Yezi," Dae calls in bafflement. Ever since the accident, they hadn’t left each other’s side. They slept in the same hotel room, despite there being enough rooms. They had late night talks whereby they felt comforted in each other as sisters for the first time. Their bound had never ever been like this before, whereby they hardly spoke to each other yet felt distant in their experiences- but at the same time they wanted to protect each other, they wanted to love each other more than ever. But not even Dae could understand the sudden twist and burst of emotions from her little sister. In Dae’s mind when looking at her little sister- after all the talks they’ve had she would have never thought that an idea of even keeping the child was valid. "You want to keep it?" Dae asks quietly.
With the question hanging in the air and all ears attentive to Yezi, while their brains are in astonishment of the seemingly new revelation, Yezi presses her hands to her stomach and nods her head slowly. There's a long pause in the air causing Yezi's heart to beat rapidly and she's afraid to look up. She already knows what her dad will say, what Chungdae will say, what Dae will say, but she doesn't care. “I want to keep it, I need to keep it.”
There’s such a strong tensed silence that moves around the room. Chenle’s chest is mounting with such boiling anger when looking at his daughter.
“Why?” Chungdae asks in confusion, distress and fear especially when feeling her husband’s hand bulging. “Yezi-”
“No.” Chenle is seething through his teeth. The ‘no’ serves as a mind snapping effect for Yezi. She looks up to her dad with tears in her eyes, her jaw trembling.
“Dad.”
“No.” Chenle is firm when saying his final verdict. It doesn't matter that Yezi full of sadness attempts to speak- Chenle doesn’t want it. "No. You are not keeping it. No daughter of mine will-"
"But dad-"
"I said no Yezi." Chenle shakes his head again trying to calm himself down. "You're not keeping it. You're not keeping that bastard of a child. You are going to take the pills now and tomorrow-"
"Dad I'll never forgive myself for killing it-"
"Forgive yourself? You're not at fault here." Chungdae adds with confusion seeing that Yezi shakes her head and seems determined. "And it's not alive yet, you're not killing it. You're removing it."
"Mum please." Yezi sits on the edge of her seat looking desperate. “I can’t do it. I can’t go on with allowing this little thing in me to die. I don’t have the heart to go through with the abortion. I would never forgive myself-”
“For fuck- Yezi!” Chenle can’t believe what he’s hearing. From the corner of the room, the little Daegal is quivering and shivering by the uproar of Chenle’s voice. “No-”
“Dad you’re not carrying this so you don’t understand.” Yezi finds herself breaking free from Dae’s hand and standing up with her arms covering her womb. “You don’t understand how long it took me to get to this point. I’ve thought about it ever since I found out. I will keep the baby. Not because I am excited to have it, but because I don’t want to kill it. I cannot square it with my conscious. It's also a living being and has a right to life, and I shouldn't decide whether it gets to live or not. I don’t have that right and it’s heartless and inhumane even thinking about taking away-"
As Yezi hits nerve after nerve Chenle is so close – a pinch away from forcing his daughter to have no choice, the words that she’s saying only make his blood boil. Her words render Chungdae silent as her thoughts are suddenly on her past mistakes. Not only Chungdae, but Dae as well knows that whether it was intentional or not Yezi was hitting on and referring to the reason her parents split and that was because of Chungdae and her ‘babies’.
“Do you know what pain I’m feeling at just the thought of giving it up-”
Dae can feel the tension slowly rising in the room, and if Yezi didn’t choose her words correctly then most assuredly she would be in big trouble. “Yezi-”
But Yezi’s already so hot with her words and can’t back down as she speaks over Dae shaking her head. “I’ve read the damages that abortions can have on a woman’s body. Dad you should know far better than anyone what abortions can do-” Her jaws tremble glaring at her dad now with such overwhelming anger. “What if I’ll never get a chance like this again? Huh? You and Chungdae have been trying for a really long time but nix and zilch have been the results-”
Chungdae feeling jabbed shakes her head. “That’s not- Sweety please let’s not-”
“You can't even give birth anymore because of all those abortions you’ve had while having an affair with my dad behind my mum’s back. You both took the right away and now you want me to make that same fucked up decision as-”
She’s not expecting the rough hand of her dad gripping onto her wrist and dragging her with such force and strength. “Honey please-” Chungdae has to suck up her pride and wipe her eyes when trying to follow Chenle.
“Where are those pills?”
“Honey please let’s just sit and talk-”
“No.”
"No?" Chungdae follows rapidly behind Chenle who busts opens into different drawers around their room while Yezi yells for her dad to let her go. “Honey please, she’s crying and-”
“Where are the pills?!”
Chungdae is taken aback at Chenle shouting when directing his attention to her.
“This is my daughter! There’s no way in fucking hell will I ever allow her to even consider keeping that thing in her womb! It’s not hers and we’re not raising that thing!” Chenle’s jaw locks when his eyes take notice of the sullen look plastered over her features.
“That ‘thing’ was in my womb too, and I…” The look of guilt coats Chungdae’s face, dampening his mood when seeing how teary and weary eyed she gets. At this point it’s by instinct how he always tries to wipe the tears off her eyes before they fall off. Letting go of Yezi instantly just so he can attend to Chungdae only leaves Chungdae in a remorseful crying mess as she covers her face with shame. “If I hadn’t had all those abortions then maybe we would’ve been… I would’ve been able to give you the child you wanted-It’s all my fault, I’m sorry honey-”
“No, no.” Chenle’s voice simmers down into a low tenderly octave when hearing how broken and crushed his wife’s cry is. He walks carefully towards her, his hands holding onto her shoulders looking just as vulnerable. “It wasn’t your fault. Don’t do that baby, don’t,” Straightaway he wraps his arms around her securing her from the emotions that have resurfaced. “Baby… we made that decision t-together. It’s not your fault.. You didn’t…I don’t blame you at all my love. Please, don’t cry,”
“Yezi’s right-” Chungdae whimpers, not being able to stop the tears as well as remove her hands from her blotched crying face.
“She’s not right, don’t listen to her. She will not disrespect you like that and-”
Chungdae shakes her head, knowing exactly what Yezi meant. Chenle would never understand what it’s like to live with that conscious memory of having done an abortion, only for it to affect everything years later. He would never get it because he refused to come to terms with the fact that she took away the one thing he was really excited about, and that was to have kids with her.
The first few times when they found out she was pregnant was in their mutual decision to remove baby after baby in hopes of Chenle’s former wife not to find out, but after the cat got out the bag and Chenle came clean to his wife of his affair did Chungdae unintentionally decide to remove the baby thinking that this would’ve been the last time she’d see him ever again. Little did she know that it would’ve been the last time she’d ever be able to conceive again.
Her tears are all over the place, loud enough for Dae to even hear. Upon seeing Yezi frantically walk towards the door- Dae stops her. “That was a low blow Yezi. Did you really have to?”
“But it’s true.”
“Just because it’s true it doesn’t give you the right to just bring stuff like that up. You know Chungdae is sensitive to -”
“She’s sensitive because she fucked up-”
“You think you’re not being a fuck up right now?” Dae yanks Yezi by her arm when she opens up the main door. Forcing Yezi to look at her they both look at each other intensely. “Look, I probably don’t have much of a say in you and wanting to keep it but don’t drag mum down-”
“You keep forgetting she’s not my mum,” Yezi rips her arm away from Dae. “And plus. I already spoke to mum- our real mum. She said I can keep it.”
Dae has a puzzled almost annoyed face. “You’ve been talking to her? Yezi do you even know-”
“Just because she used dad, and you didn’t get along with her doesn’t mean she’s not my mum anymore. She’s still a mother to me, I love her more than I ever did you and dad, she’s still my mum and she gave me enough clarity to decide for myself.” Yezi doesn’t look hurt, but her eyes do look somber upon talking about her mother.
Dae can only try to breathe in as she finds the right words to say despite her anger slowly rising. “You’re forgetting that she’s the one who asked for that divorce not dad. She’s the one who left us for her new free life. She didn’t take us with her because she didn’t want us- so what could she possibly tell you about child birth that would make you consider even keeping that thing? The mother that I know would’ve never even allowed you to keep a rapist’s child.”
“You’re wrong, our mother- just like dad loved kids. And it’s not a rapist’s child, it’s my child.” And with that Yezi opens up the front door and bangs it. She has no real destination when leaving the house- all she knows is that she needed to clear her head. It’s past 10pm and she doesn’t even-
“Going somewhere?”
She stops, being startled for a second. Standing by a black vehicle, she spots the Officer Na Jaemin. “Officer Na,” Her gaze being fazed by his presence. “What’re you doing here?”
Jaemin simply stares at the girl. “Patrol work. Your father wanted tight security while being here in the rental house.”
“Tight security by yourself?”
Jaemin shifts his weight a little displaying the black tinted window of the car. He knocks twice on it, causing the window to roll down displaying a shy smiling Officer Jisung. “Yes?”
“Jisung and I are here, there’s two at the back, two on each side, and two at the gates. We’re tight if the time calls for it.” Jaemin points out. “Once again, are you going somewhere? If so we’ll escort you.”
Yezi shakes her head. “No, it’s fine.” Being pissed by the sudden securing of protection she walks back the path to the house but stops midway with a nonstop chaotic mind and walks back towards the Officers. Jisung’s window is rolled back up while Jaemin has his head down within his padded jacket. He blends in so well with the car being black and everything he has on being black- including his hair.
“Officer,”
He peeks up again, and Yezi can see that under his eyes there’s faint marks. He looks tired. “What.” He doesn’t seem the least bit interested in what she has to say, all that he wants to do is sleep.
Yezi however pants in and out looking like a fish caught in water. “I… I want to keep it. I want to keep the baby that’s growing in me.” Yezi’s eyes water. “But I don’t want anyone to hate me for it.”
Jaemin can stare as his ears adjust to the words coming out of her mouth. “You… Did you just say you want to keep it?” How old is she? It’s probably the reason she’s even outside, maybe she wanted a clear head to think better. And if so, Jaemin had to stop her because he was the wrong person for this type of conversation. “Should I call your dad?”
“No-” Yezi shakes her head before hanging it down with trembling lips.
“Look, I’m only 23. I’m a male. And I’m not a part of your family, so you can’t just tell me all these things,” He’s 23, a male and an officer with no family as he was an orphaned boy. There’s nothing that he could say that would be of any assistance to this girl who’s 16…7 years younger than him. However, when she doesn’t move and her shoulders shudder, he grows uncomfortable in his padded jacket and inwardly cusses. He was always the worst when it came to giving some sort of relief. He turns his head to the car just in time seeing Jisung look away.
After a long silence, it takes Yezi blurting out a little cry does Jaemin breathe out his nose and licks his lips looking at her. Yezi tries to contain herself by remaining silent and sniffs back her tears (which made Jaemin feel tight in place) while wiping the back of her sleeve over her eyes. She doesn’t look up, but her body turns around and she begins walking away. It only takes a few steps before Jaemin’s voice comes out. “I can listen.” He speaks out. “If you want to… talk,”
If she came outside, it’s because she most likely had an argument with her family. And the last place she probably wants to go is inside.
That makes her stop in her tracks, and ever so slowly she peers up into Jaemin’s eyes. He looks nervous and almost worried. Nervous to the point that he even stands straighter and gets his hands out his padded jacket. “I don’t think I’ll be of any use,” He shrugs his shoulders scratching the back of his head. “But, I can listen,”
Yezi turns her body around in a slow manner, her eyes are slightly teary but upon gazing into his sincere eyes does she fully turn her body around to face him.
“So,” Jaemin clears his throat uneasily. “You want… to keep it?”
“Yeah,” Her voice is low and shaky. “Because for the first time after the accident, I saw a glimpse of light.” Her hands pressing onto each other as she slowly inhales and exhales looking up slightly to the stars that are a few in the night heavenly sky. “We were in the hospital with my mum and dad, and they did an ultrasound.” A gloomy look gets on her crestfallen face, but Jaemin’s eyes are on the watery glaze that coat her eyes making them crystal clear as if they’re twinkling. “On that screen I saw… this tiny little pea. That little pea in me was so small… and this was the darkest time in my life, but looking at that little dot on the screen I felt…hope. Strangely. I felt something come alive in me again. Like a light in a dark tunnel. And I remembered thinking that, I couldn’t protect myself, you know.” She sniffs and her hands gently cup her abdomen. “I fought and I really tried to stop him from, you know. I fought so hard and I tried. I tried but… there was nothing I could do. So looking at the screen, seeing that there was something moving in me, that this tiny ball was moving around as if it already had life… I knew that even if I couldn’t protect myself, I could protect that baby, because it’s my baby. It’s coming from inside of me, this little pea will somehow become something, will somehow bare it’s own life.”
Jaemin blinks slowly no expression on his face except an honest concern for the girl. “You want to keep the very thing that’s come from something so painful?”
“I don’t even like kids that much, but I don’t want to remove this baby in me. This doesn’t feel like the trauma of rape…but this is me protecting this baby,”
“Protecting it from what?” Jaemin whispers. “What’s your reason for keeping it?”
“It’s the fact that it’s a life-”
“It’s not a life,” Jaemin lowly inputs making Yezi shake her head.
“It’s in me Officer Na, I can feel that there’s something in me.” She breaths out. “Because it’s a product from something so painful… doesn’t give me any right to take away something as precious as life from it, that’s not even born. I… Do I really need a reason in order for me to keep it? Why do I need a reason that will be good enough for anyone to listen? This…” Yezi’s eyes flattering with tears make Jaemin alert in getting his back off the car and stepping forward to the girl. “What would make me any different from a person sitting in a prison cell because they murdered another person? Murdered another human being?”
“That doesn’t count,”
“The only difference is that taking an unborn baby’s life away is somehow legal. That’s not fair. Officer Suh didn’t deserve to be killed like that, but because he was gunned down by someone who intentionally wanted to kill him made that person a murderer. And I would be one too if I took away this baby’s life intentionally- other people can get rid of it if they want, but why is it wrong for me to want to keep it?”
“Hey,” Jaemin’s hesitant and alert when the tears won’t stop falling from her eyes. He carefully lays his hand on her shoulder and clears his throat. “Hey, don’t cry about it.”
“I just wanted some air, I just wanted a break. I don’t want my dad to take this little baby away from me,” Her tears don’t stop pouring out, resulting in Jaemin hesitantly stepping forward and wrapping his arms around the girl. He sighs quietly when she takes another step forward and wraps her arms around his torso crying out.
“It’s okay, just cry it out,” Jaemin finds himself soothing and consoling her. “Hopefully everything will be okay,” He mummers out.
But 3 months later…prior to what Jaemin said, everything was not okay. In fact, things kept falling apart.
Yezi lingers by the doorway of the house hearing the commotion erupting from inside the house, mostly likely Dae’s room. Chungdae who’s standing next to Yezi closes the door and sighs. They just came from another ultrasound from a private hospital and just after receiving good news from the doctor and a lovely sonogram picture of her beautiful looking baby, she walks into the chaos of her family. She thought that after the first month her family would be ‘normal’ again. But from her dad purposely ignoring her presence because of wanting to keep the baby, to Chungdae often being left in the middle of choosing her husband and step kid, to Chenle getting intense stress not only at work and with building the new house (which would be far away) but also from Dae’s excessively new lifestyle- Yezi can only see her family going down a spiraling hill of dismay.
The only thing that’s been uplifting or of any sort of good news, is the media outlets dying down and Yezi being able to continue her homeschooling with Doyoung without getting bombarded by some news crew. Another good thing that Yezi kept looking forward to is surprisingly her new ‘friendship’ with the Officer Na Jaemin. At this point, with her sister turning into somebody else, and Chungdae becoming more motherly towards her, the only person she would truly and freely chat to about everything falling apart and a way to clear her mind was Jaemin. For the most parts he only listened and barely looked like her cared, but Yezi knew better because he’d always be ready to listen to her, and Yezi found it caring that aside from getting Boba coffees for himself and Jisung, he’d also get for her as well (and sneak in some of her pregnancy cravings that Chungdae wouldn’t approve of).
But right now, it’s 5pm in the afternoon and already she can hear the back and forth arguments from her dad and Dae.
Lately, it’s become a habit of her dad and older sister fighting back and forth. Dae found refuge in going clubbing with her friends, getting wasted, getting drunk and coming back home dumb out of her mind, out of her senses. Dae, under the overwhelming pressure of everything; from dropping out of college and getting paid lessons online, to being forced to work with her dad, to getting intense nightmares about being sexually assaulted that night by Mark, to getting pressured from her friends to let loose and party with them- to Dae ultimately deciding that her life is nothing but one big joke.
Slowly, right before their eyes, Dae was becoming an addict to a lifestyle that was highly frowned upon in their family. The once head strong girl of the family was crumbling and numbing her senses to intoxicating alcohol….and worst of all drugs.
“For hell’s sake you’re not leaving the house dressed like a whore!”
“Don’t touch my stuff-”
“Dae- What’s this?”
“Dad I said don’t touch my stuff-”
“Where the hell did you get this?” Yezi slowly walks in the house watching Chungdae disappear behind some walls, probably going to try and calm down the situation. But from the sounds of it, Yezi can hear how her dad is slowly losing his temper.
“Give it back!” Dae yells and a few seconds later she hears Chungdae.
“Dae, what the hell is going on through your head? How could you-”
Yezi jumps a little when hearing a door slammed shut. Next thing a fazed and alert looking Dae stomps into the hallway with the most daring of outfits in the shortest black dress that hardly covers her exposed rare and yet has a spilt on both sides, paired together with fishnet stockings and clicking heels. Upon seeing Yezi, Dae’s enraged face that’s coated in hardcore makeup freezes into one of shame. Her eyes wither and she lightly puts down her skirt while a nervous smile coats her face as she walks to Yezi. “H-hey? You’re back,”
Yezi only has a sad smile on her face hugging her sister and smelling yet again the most nauseating smells of alcohol. “Hey,” She pips. “Are you going ou-”
“Oh what’s this.” Dae completely cuts off taking the picture out of Yezi’s hand and looking at the ultrasound. “Wow. It’s so big now.” Yezi’s eyes water a little while looking at her sister. Her hair which is curly to the extreme makes her look like a mess, her eyes are wide with joy but Yezi knows that her sister’s struggling and to make it worse she’s been losing weight like crazy. “Do they know it’s gender yet?”
Before Yezi can respond she hears heavy footsteps trudging down the stairs and Dae’s anger peeking out of her eyes before she stiffly mummers. “We’ll talk later.” Was a common phrase that she’d say regularly but she never held up to her word and they’d hardly talk.
And just like that Dae stomps away in her high heels, yanks the front door open and slams it just as Chenle in fury steps into the living room with several packets of white substances and needles. He pants and curses before going to the door and pulling it back and storming out.
“Cocaine,”
Yezi looks back when hearing Chungdae leaning by the hallway entrance.
“It was cocaine.”
And because this situation has become far too normal in their house, Yezi moves over to her mum and lays down the wall next to her and comforts her crying frame.
“What are we doing wrong?” Chungdae asks while sniffing in. “Our Dae,”
And so the days go by, with Chungdae and Yezi growing their bond through their mutual love and interest for the coming baby. Going to the hospital together, seeing the ultrasound in high-frequency and hearing sound waves of the baby’s heartbeat create in Yezi a desire to keep pushing despite the pain she feels in her heart of her family falling apart. Chenle in the house becomes scarce, just as much as Dae. While Dae publicly drinks and drowns away her life, Chenle shuts himself in private bars drinking during the night and working during the day. The house felt so lonely, and reminds Yezi of the first few days of how it was like when their mum left them. The house was void without a motherly touch until Chungdae came around. And up till now, Yezi without a doubt aspires to be the light that Chungdae is, smiling despite the pain and remaining strong for everyone.
Chungdae comforts Chenle whenever he lays in bed with her, she comforts Yezi in all times whenever Yezi calls, and she tries so desperately to be there for Dae- who has completely shut down. It’s hard to believe that Dae is her sister, she’s become unrecognizable in the family. It doesn’t help that slowly she started looking like a stranger, skinny form from all the intake of cocaine and alcohol, shaved eyebrows, dyed bleach blonde hair, cutting her hair so short, piercings and a slow growing tattoo kink all over her legs.
6 months later, still with their new house being built and them still living in the rental house Yezi thought their situation would’ve calmed down. However, it just got worse. One too many times she’s spotted Hendery leaving their house while scrambling to put on his clothes after having a steamy night and disrupting everyone from sleeping. She’d only do this whenever dad was not in the house- and if ever dad was in the house and he heard such, he’d be on full defense mode and barge into Dae’s room with repulsion. Of course this would erupt another fight from them with Dae leaving with Winwin, sometimes Yang Yang, but a lot of the times Hendery would be guilty at the scene- soon becoming Chenle’s worst human beings.
“And she keeps sleeping with them in the house. I feel bad that I can’t do anything to even help her out,” Yezi mutters while eating on a secret pack of chocolate balls that Jaemin bought. Jaemin, leaning against the car while watching Yezi (who is seated on the hood of his car) and dipping his fingers in the pack of chocolate balls while listening to her.
“Do you still speak to her?”
“It’s hard to,” Yezi responds. “She’s barely in the house, and when she’s in the house she’s occupied with some boy locked up in the room- but it’s only for a moment before mum or dad barge in and she storms out,”
“Damn,” Jaemin mutters. “Your parents must be the most stressed people in that house right now.” Jaemin acknowledges.
Despite not being on duty of being on night patrol, he’d always come for his weekly chats with Yezi. In some way, he ordained himself as her therapist. Maybe it’s because he wanted to simply be of help to the girl, but in some distorted way…he enjoyed having a ‘friend’ in Yezi. It was odd calling their late night talks as some sort of stress relieve, but Jaemin felt that there was no other way to describe his new found friendship with her. He didn’t have any friends aside from Jisung, but yet when it came to Yezi he found it easy to be around her and just not try to force anything. All he had to do was listen, and she’d do the rest. It became interesting when she’d do the same for him and allow herself to listen to all he had to say.
“Speaking of which, any progress with your dad?” Jaemin asks.
“It’s been months since I last spoke to him. It feels even awkward being in the same space as him. Even if there is an issue between us, I still believe that as a healthy parent he’ll discuss the problem openly with me. Silence is not a solution, but it somehow sums up my relationship with him now.” Yezi mutters and shrugs her shoulders. “He doesn’t even look at me,”
“I’m sorry about that,” Jaemin says sincerely.
“Mum says I should just give him time, that he’ll come around. But I doubt it. Whereby I would talk to him day and night, all we do now is say good morning and good night, at times we go a full day without even greeting each other.” Yezi sighs and puts her hand on her stomach, which was a healthy looking bump after 6 months. “I’m just afraid that the day I give birth to my child, my dad will- oh my god.” Yezi’s eyes grow in brightness her hand quickly pressing and feeling onto her stomach. “Officer Na-”
Jaemin is alarmed and panicked by the smile on her face. “What happened? What’s wrong?”
“Feel it,” Yezi’s mouth is left agape as the wondrous joy surrounds her. Jaemin doesn’t even need to put his hand on her belly to know that it’s kicking. The way her stomach flamboyantly moves creates a smile to grow on his face. “Feel it,” Yezi urges as her mouth grows wider in joy. “Oh my god, look,”
Jaemin is hesitant when lifting his hand since he sees that even the layer of the shirt is moving up and down from the bumps on her stomach. She’s not even focused on him, but Jaemin’s smile is radiant when seeing how happy she is. The only times he’s seen her happy was whenever they’d talk about the baby- and seeing how her face lights up makes him drawn to her smile.
“Look, look, look,” She presses her shirt down so that her bump is revealed more and so that Jaemin can see how flamboyantly the belly bulges are- the baby kicking or punching and being free with the belly of it’s soon to be mother.
“Wow,” Jaemin chuckles. “That’s a boy right?”
“I don’t know yet,” Yezi smiles and looks up to Jaemin. “Feel it,”
Jaemin lifts his hand up to her stomach and wonders where he should put it on, but then Yezi points to a spot and Jaemin gently lays his hand down. He doesn’t press or remove his hand when in a flash where his hand is that’s where he feels several bulges popping out- beating him. “My fucking soul- Doesn’t that hurt?” Jaemin is startled in shock but laughs nervously when Yezi starts laughing.
Chenle, from his room on the second floor carefully looks out the window when hearing his child laugh. He felt the most pain in him for neglecting his children. Lately, he’s fallen on his path of drinking more wine than he should. He couldn’t help it. He had two daughters who were out of his reach now, and there was nothing he could do to bring them back to him. And just like now, he can only stand and watch from afar how one laughs, while the other is nowhere to be seen but is for sure having a good time.
“Hey,” Chenle doesn’t shift his eyes off of Yezi’s smile. Even when Chungdae wraps her arms around his waist and lays her head on his shoulder. “You know it’s not too late to reconcile with her,”
Chenle sighs and closes his eyes and leans on the window frame as he lifts his arm around Chungdae’s shoulders. “I don’t think she’d want to reconcile with me,”
“What are you talking about honey, you know she’d love to talk to you,” Chungdae whispers while looking up to Chenle. “It’s all she ever talks about. About if you’ll ever forgive her,”
Despite Chenle respecting Yezi’s decision by not interfering in a forceful manner, he believed that silence between them is the only way.
“You know if she was somehow pregnant with someone she knows and wanted to keep the child at this age, I wouldn’t be as hard, but this… It’s an omen. A bastard’s child.” Chenle whispers only for Chungdae to lay her head on his shoulder.
“I know, but a child isn’t an omen,”
Chenle shakes its’ head. “Forget what the media is saying, that bastard child will grow up and will look just like the person who raped her. How do you think the child will feel knowing it’s a product of rape?”
“How do you think the child will feel in a house that’s unwelcoming?”
“It doesn’t belong here,” Chenle whispers. “It’s difficult to wrap my head around her wanting to give birth to that damned child.” He mutters and opens his eyes looking outside again. When he hears another loud laugh from her and the Officer Na rapidly removing his hands and flapping them, a meek smile grows on Chenle’s lips as he whispers. “When she was still in the womb, she’d kick like crazy. It terrified the shit out of me,”
“She needs you the most right now honey,” Chungdae whispers back before turning her gaze outside.
“And I need my daughter back too, but it’s clear she’s not coming back,” Chenle mummers. “That girl right there is going to be a mother to a bastard child, and I don’t think I want to be a part of that life.”
And so it is. The 9th month mark hitting on the calendar alerting Yezi to being ready for any day that her surprise child would come out. She’s saddened that both her dad and Dae are nowhere near her during those days. The new year passes and days progress with Yezi, barely being able to walk with her stomach on full display of the big pregnancy she has. While being small- despite the little weight she gained, she still looked so young and to think she’d bring in life to the world encouraged her to carry on.
February comes along with Yezi getting nervous that she’s not going into labor even when the month is close to ending. Already being worried and terrified, even when sitting on top of Jaemin’s car and expressing her worry- she’s not expectant at all when feeling wet and water dripping from her uterus. “Jaemin?” She nervously calls while having her eyes wide open.
“What? What’s wrong? Yezi, calm down,” Jaemin doesn’t know what’s going on when her face is drained of blood, but when she struggles to get off the car and holds unto the bottom of her stomach- looking shitless scared Jaemin takes a wild guess to know; “Don’t tell me it’s time now? Is it time?”
Yezi can’t speak or produce coherent words when she squeezes her legs together and bends trying to hold under her belly trying to maintain the weight that feels like it’s going to fall out. “Mum! Jaemin call mum! Mum! Oh mu god! Oh my god! Mum it’s coming out!” She implores when the pain kicks in her stomach.
With Chenle not being in the house and Chungdae not knowing how to drive, is panicked when hearing Yezi crying out for her life. Jaemin thankfully is alert and eager to assist when taking both Chungdae and Yezi in his car driving them. Yezi is on the verge- panting and moaning in pain in sweats and looks like any time soon she’ll faint. Chungdae is panicked and in heats of trying to calm down while also telling Yezi to breath and relax. Thankfully even despite the roads being hectic, Jaemin uses his siren and police advantage to cut the stop signs and traffic lights trying to get as fast as he can to any hospital nearby as the one they retained to was too far. It’s close, with Yezi almost collapsing in the backseat does Jaemin eventually get to a hospital carrying Yezi and lunging to the doors.
Triumphantly, the nurses don’t give them any problems and instantly assist when seeing the blood staining her pants and Yezi crying out for her dear life. Chungdae is inside the hospital room with Yezi, while Jaemin is outside reminiscing on such an experience. He’s never felt as heavy weighted as he did and hearing as well as seeing Yezi succumb to pain terrified him.
Jaemin is awakened by a jolly nurse who comes out with all smiles. “It’s a girl.”
Yezi, at 1 a.m. on a Sunday morning of late February, almost having driven herself to the brink of death when assertively pushing out of her tiny body- weighing 5 pounds and 8 ounces (2,500 grams) a beautiful miniature and petite baby girl.
Yezi is in heaps of sweat, her legs shaking in pain and uterus throbbing yet a gleeful and prideful smile lights up her entire face even when she cries after holding onto the little baby girl in her arms. She can’t stop crying for the reasons of both joy and sadness. The little, healthy, bundle of radiance in the baby girl shines so bright and takes away her family not being present. Yezi can’t believe her eyes. A tiny little thing with eyes pressed close and body rigid yet having it’s arms out and gripping onto her hair only overwhelms her, and the joy spreading all over her makes her cry blissfully.
“My baby.” Yezi whispers upon kissing the top of the fragile little head of the baby girl. “Oh my god she’s so tiny. I’m gonna protect you okay, mummy’s gonna protect you and you’re safe now okay? My beautiful baby girl, my baby,” Yezi cries holding tightly onto the baby- and even in return as the nurses gently try to take her away to clean her up- do her tiny little fingers grip onto Yezi’s hair crying when they try to pull her away. The scene is surreal and makes Yezi cry even more.
No amount of happiness that Yezi has ever felt in her life can ever top this moment of paradise and bliss.
“Everything went well,” Chungdae smiles with tears running down her face, while watching the nurses take care of the baby and the doctors closing Yezi’s uterus. “It’s a baby girl,”
Chenle despite not being present still feels in his heart pain for the departure of his daughter upon the new arrival of her daughter. “I’m happy they weren’t any complications,” But despite it all, he still smiles when Chungdae speaks so highly and positive of the baby.
While Chungdae chats with Chenle in a peaceful manner she laughs when watching the nurses change and hand the baby to Jaemin who’s panicked at how Yezi passes out with a smile on her face.
Meanwhile, downtown (2 a.m.) in a local club that’s drowning its customers with music, Dae grinds her body friskily all over Hendery’s toned body blurring out the world around her. The music is loud, the music is bold with slurs and ideologies scowled upon, but that doesn’t stop the others or Dae or Hendery from drunkenly dancing and dry humping on each other singing and cursing along to the songs. It’s when she heavily starts making out with Hendery does she heavily feel the weight and strong sense of someone staring at her- even as she’s drunk she can’t shake that feeling off. Ever since she walked in partly sober, all the way till she heavily inducted herself in the drinks and stashed drugs Hendery had- did she feel as though she was being watched.
Not paying mind to it, her and Hendery take it over to the co-ed bathroom having a rash and messy quickie with both of them barely conscious of their actions. Dae is sloppy when sucking off Hendery and Hendery is lacking when it comes to thrusting with power- but they’re both so high that they barely care and yet still cum to the thoughts of sexual pleasure and having a good time. They’re drunk and high out of their mind when returning back to the dance floor to have another go at wasting their lives away.
Jeno, being sober and cleaning on the counter after the spilt drinks of the dozens of intoxicated bodies, finds it hard to believe that the girl he’s looking at is the same girl he had a crush on. As time goes by, his eyes are only hooked to her in uneasiness and at times even revulsion as she’s not in her right senses and doing things that he’d never thought she’d do. From grinding with one too many men, to making out with anyone that puts their lips on her, to some point even groping and gripping on her like a ragdoll- Jeno can only watch in shock that this lady with short bleached out blonde hair, bright red bra and tight exotically short red leather skirt, dancing her life away is supposedly the same person that he saw in court 1 year ago.
Back then she had a strong persona, charismatic eyes, bountiful personality and good physics coated in her rich glory. The lady he knew had strangers looking at her all the time because of her rich lavish life, as well as good healthy appearance as people wanted to be her, as well as wanted to be friends with her. The same lady he knew made him see rich people in a different light, a light of being beautiful yet so self-absorbed and selfish. However, upon looking at the dance floor at 3 am, seeing a skinny deranged lady dancing like a drug addict commoner makes him worriedly curious about what happened.
There’s no way this was that same girl, there’s no way this unhealthy looking skimpy dancer is Dae. There’s just no way.
He was just in prison for 12 months, yet upon coming out and managing to get a job as a cleaner in a bar- he’s shocked out of his mind at how much a year can change a person. He only started working some days ago, but the moment his eyes landed on Dae and he began seeing her every single night at the club.
And for 2 weeks of Dae not being in the house, and Yezi being discharged and being the happiest she can be when being around her child, no one can take away her joy- not Dae’s messy life, not her father’s absence and lack of response to her- nothing can take the smile off her face. Even when her own baby cries.
“Areum you’ve got the most gorgeous smile, I have ever seen in my entire life, so tell me why, why are you crying so much? Is it because you don’t like your nappy being changed?” Yezi playfully plays with her child while changing the pampers and applying the medicine on her baby’s umbilical cord. Despite the baby girl, Areum crying, Yezi still coo’s cutely and playfully plays with her child while hurriedly changing her and giving her new pampers.
Chenle, who can’t stand the wails, goes into his room where Chungdae is ironing the baby’s clothes. “The baby’s crying.” He proclaims in irritation.
“Be a grandfather and help your daughter,” Chungdae sneakily answers with a mischievous smile. “Come on honey, there’s a first time for everything.”
Chenle despondently rolls his eyes and walks out the room going to the living room continuing to watch the news informatics while he works. He puts the volume louder blocking out the sounds of the whining crying child. In the room, Chungdae can only chuckle as she finishes ironing and walks back to Yezi’s room and coo’s. “Oh oh oh oh oh, why is my Areum crying? Why is my beauty beauty little girl crying huh? Does she want to be warm? Does she want to be warm?”
Truly speaking, this child, Areum brought a wide smile to her face. There’s a first time for everything, and helping Yezi look after her child felt like such a huge privilege for her. She never had this opportunity of caressing and even holding onto a baby- but yet Yezi gave her that integrity and honor of being there as a mother to her child. Chungdae more than anything loved the idea of having children, but when she found out that she was unable to, it crushed her. But now, being a premature grandmother gave her a glimpse into the life of what it’s like having a child. And she so badly wanted to have this experience with Chenle. Which is why when Yezi nervously questions, “Is he mad?”
Her answer is always. “Leave him, he’ll come around sooner or later. He can’t be too angry at our little Areum, hm,” Chungdae brushes her face on the little baby’s belly causing the dressed baby girl to squirm in delight and joy. “Look at that smile, look at that smile, my baby, my little Areum,”
Chenle shakes his head when for a spilt second the silence that consumes the living room from the pause break on tv, Chenle hears both the ladies dumbing down their intellect to speak in foreign baby voices and act cute.
Having the full support of her mother, Yezi is at peace when living her life around the house. Not only does she feel the weight and responsibility of being a mother, but she gracefully embodies and embraces a whole set of accountabilities. When waking up next to her baby, she’s always reminded of how she so badly wants to change her life and make sure that she’s a good, fit, role model and mother for her child. It pushes her to study to the best of her ability. She wasn’t born with a smart brain, but she has been applying herself and trying. And in the same way the nurses cared for her during her whole stay at the hospital, she also wanted to be a nurse who’d help people.
It seemed laughable at first, but when talking with Doyoung (her tutor) and he encouraged her to pursue her growing passion- her life seemed to be heading in a tremendously great path. Every day her face glowed brighter because of her Areum who would always look at her with the most caring of smiles. Her smile reminded her so much of Dae. Although it was annoying at times to see a smile on Dae’s fac, Yezi can now see how much a smile (a genuine) smile costs. Seeing Areum smile, is equivalent to seeing Dae smile. But despite missing her big sister, seeing her little baby girl always made Yezi remember how she wanted to protect her child from any bad omen projecting in this world.
And that means not even letting her drunk and high older sister near her child.
“Why won’t you let me see her?” Dae asks. With big gleaming and jittery eyes, as well as bad breath and coughing consistently, tragedy is all over her, and she’s shaky and has a nervous stance while scratching on her arm- this always alarms Yezi. Her sister was no longer the same. The mere fact that she looks like she’s on drugs doesn’t even sit well with Yezi or even convince her to allow her sister to be anywhere near her child.
Dae, for the worst, turned into the lifestyle that she hated, she smokes weed, sniffs on cocaine, injects heroin in her system on most days, drinks on heavy substances and looks like a completely different person especially with her no eyebrows and that god awful ugly bleached blonde and damaged short hairstyle. This wasn’t her loving sister anymore- this was a corpse living in her sister’s body. And there’s no way she’d allow for a skeleton with no soul to see her baby.
“She’s sleeping and I don’t want to wake her up,” Creating excuses and avoiding her sister has become such a huge burden for Yezi. All she wanted was for her sister to come back, but in this state of drowsiness and confusion only scares her that her sister will never get back.
Everything about her moved differently, her brain started working inversely, even her words weren’t giving life but breaking down and slowing down her speech, her posture was altered, her eye contact was unalike and her lips were always dry, even when she’d lick them they’d always turn white and cracked rapidly. It’s like her sister was morphing into something else, and sadly it wasn’t even a transitional phase, it was a reality that Dae couldn’t escape and Yezi’s heart was in pain seeing her sister like this, every day, without even knowing what she could do.
“Stop lying!” Dae yells and alarms Yezi. “You’re ashamed of me and don’t want me near your fucking child! Who cares anyway, she’s nothing but a pathetic resemblance of the fucker who raped you! You bitch. You dumb fuck always refusing me to see that fucker-” Yezi holds her ground when watching her sister break down all types of slurs. She turns around when hearing her baby crying in the room and ignores Dae shutting the door in her face just as Dae barks louder and emits all types of curses. “She’s also a huge fuck. She’s gonna rob houses, take advantage of people, she’s gonna hate- just like I hate you-”
“Dae? No, stop it.” Chenle holds onto Dae, but Dae thrusts her arms off her father and pushes him back.
“Everyone in this house should just fucking die already! You’re all looking at me like I’m a mess? No, I’m not- you all are!” Dae chuckles, but it’s so sad for Chenle to witness it all happen right before his eyes. “So what if I’m a mess- you all are fucking caged to this fucked up life! Fuck you all!”
Dae shuts her room door still slurring out. Chenle shakes his head, and turns to Yezi’s door. He carefully knocks on it and moments later, Yezi opens it up cautiously, but when seeing her dad she opens the door a little bit wider. “Are you okay?”
Yezi nods her head gulping down a little lump. Chenle nods his head looking in the room towards the bed where the child was, and after looking at her for a bit he nods his head again and walks off.
Not a minute later, Dae opens up her room door and throws middle fingers to both Chenle and Yezi. “Fuck you guys.” Before running out the house in the shortest black mini skirt and nothing on but a leopard bra.
However, Dae, much to her own disliking, feels as though she’s hit rock bottom and is far from any sort of compassion and saving. She’s empty when falling into a darker pit of shame and misfortune night by night. And being out of the house every night only to travel into self-destruction seemed like her only remedy.
With no arms at savings rich, and no family to care for her, Dae cries alone while consuming the drugs and dances every night alone or either with friends, but mostly alone hoping that she’ll just die. Even though the pattern continues every day, the will to die grows the strongest in her.
Her prayer is answered when one night she gets to the club and begins dancing her life away before getting into a petty fight with Hendery (on who gets the bill), to storming out the club in a wobbly unsteady dizzy mess only to be hit with her whole lanky body flying up and knocked off her feet straight into the pavement ground with such crude force, rendering her knocked out and unconscious, almost like death.
They always say that the few seconds of death, you’ll get a 7 second flashback of your entire life flashing before your eyes. Dae is convinced its death because within the seconds of her death she sees a face… a face of a memory she tried so hard to forget by taking in deadly drugs. Gauging down her throat his heavy loaded dick, Mark made Dae feel numb to everything that night, even while she heard her sister crying and yelling when Donghyuck was raping her, Dae can remember Mark cumming in her mouth and she felt so worthless and like a failure for her whole family-
Despite her mind in pure intoxication and dejection, Jeno from the club rushes out to the scene when seeing the car drive away after it swept Dae and knocked her off her feet and brutally against the floor. Jeno as he’s running to Dae on the floor, gets a flash memory of how he recalled seeing her the same way in her room. Despite being a rich girl, she seems to be caught in these situations of being lost and broken.
Instantly he cradles her up and looks left and right to see who can help, but there’s no one in sight or on the street or sidewalk- just the club full of ignorant dancing fools who ignore her and him outside. She’s breathing slowly, her face covered in blood pouring from her head, her eyes shut and body trembling rigidly. He pats her cheek lightly. “Dae? Dae? Come on, come on,” He begs before cursing when feeling her bleeding from her sides and he gets up on his feet with her weak body. He puts her on his back and makes sure her hands are around his neck while his arms are over her legs as he begins running as fast as he can.
Dae doesn’t even hear a thing when feeling the wind blow past her face- looking into Jeno’s side, her vision is blurry and all she can see is death. She hiccups but to Jeno that’s assurance that she’s alive and not dying.
“Stay with me Dae, just a little bit longer.”
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Chenle can’t explain the discontent he’s been feeling with his new reality of life. In a normal life, he’s with his wife and two daughters who go to school, come home, talk about their future, ask him to buy things for them, eat all that they can eat, talk to him and ask for advice or even life lessons. In his dream he’s even gone as far to marrying them off to good men who have wealthy families and he knows that their generation will be able to sustain his wealth and inheritance. He even used to envision his grandchildren and how they’d be and how happy he’d be when dying of old age surrounded by his perfect family.
Yet in some distorted way, Chenle wakes up every day to his real reality being everything he loathes. Falling behind on work, being slow to building their new home because his mind is constantly wrapped around his daughters and all the chaotic decisions they’ve been making.
First it was Yezi and her bastard child, now it’s Dae and her spiraling life going into flames. Truly as a parent, he tried everything that he could to at least even get her to talk to him. Because that was always the first step into redemption; talking. But talking to Dae was impossible. His daughter had shut down in the worst way possible, and he didn’t know what to do.
The longest that Dae has stayed away from home was 4 days, but with a turn of events the longest that she’s stayed away from home is 2 weeks.
“Where could she be?” Chenle grows particularly concerned and troubled. He tries calling, texting but to his disappointment she doesn’t answer her phone or text back, it hardly gets to ‘seen’ and all calls go to voicemail. Chungdae tries calling, Yezi tries calling and emailing but still no answer. They call on her friends, especially Yang Yang, Winwin and Hendery who last claim that the last time they saw her she was in the club.
Before Chenle could take it a step further into filing and reporting her as a missing person, he felt bad as a parent and wondered where he went wrong. It came in an email, of Dae announcing her departure from his life. She made reference to how she didn’t want to carry on the family business, how she hated living her life like nothing happened especially after the aftermath of the accident. But what broke Chenle’s heart the most, was how she begged for him not to look for her or reach out to her, that she didn’t want him as a part of her life anymore, that she wanted to cut all ties with family and go her separate way.
The fact that this was a personalized email only sent to him and not her mother or sister, made Chenle believe that he was at fault for Dae coming to this decision. He didn’t even know where she was.
All he knows is that two months have passed and he hasn’t heard a word from her. If this is what she wanted to pursue then he didn’t want to hold her back.
That’s what he thought, but to Chungdae seeing her husband deteriorate and morph into a gloomy glum man made her miss the fluffy, peculiar, mischievous man she married. There was no light in her husband anymore. He just went to work, came home, ate in his study and fell asleep and repeated the same things everyday but like a droned out machine with no means of survival. Even when finally moving into their enlarged mansion and away from the rental home, he seemed the most distant.
The move in took about a week to settle in as the women were pampering around the house making it more suitable to their liking while at the same time modernizing it to their taste. Despite its beauty on the outside as well as inside, the house was very lonely for Chenle and he hated spending time with his family. And that was because of how they drifted apart. Chungdae and Yezi loved the baby, and Chenle didn’t.
That’s until 4 months later. He gets an off day and decides to spend it at home instead of the office. As predicted Yezi’s with her baby and Chungdae nearby Yezi. Chenle has the first layer living room all to himself and catches up on the latest informatics, however he gets up from his seat deciding to get his laptop and wor while watching the news. It’s on his way walking through the wide hallway does he get to the staircase and sees a little body bag on the floor dressed of a crocodile onesie.
It’s Yezi’s child. She’s on the top of the staircase, seemingly getting her way down by crawling on each step carefully. Chenle, like usual whenever seeing her, pays her no mind and climbs up the long flight of stairs and ignores her getting into his study room and getting his light weighing laptop as well as gadget bag before going back down the stairs. Expecting to see her still at the same spot his heart jumps out of his chest when seeing her on the last few steps but somehow tumbles and rolls down the remaining steps before smacking her head on the tiled ground.
“Shit-” He rushes down the steps and looks at the little girl who’s flat on the floor. He gets near her and gets stunned when she’s kissing the floor. Upon seeing him, she laughs joyously and crawls to sit up on the floor. He sighs in frustration. “Honey! Come get the baby.”
He walks past her and heads outside the backyard porch. He takes a seat on the veranda table with which had a serene view of his large backyard. Sometimes the thought of being rich made him feel better about his problems, as long as he had money he was okay to provide for himself any vacation he needed. With his iPad channeled to the news, while his laptop focused on the project and the tablet on notepad mode, upon seeing nature and the sky Chenle’s able to work effortlessly and soundly with no disruptions.
But he speaks too soon because Areum (being somewhat around 8 months) creeps her way outside on the wooden floor before scrambling out on the grass. Chenle has his eyes on the screen but yet after spotting her he exhales in annoyance. “Honey!” He yells out hoping that she can come and take this baby back inside. “Reckless.” He hadn’t set any barricades for the baby because the baby was always with Yezi, so he didn’t feel the need to secure any areas in the house.
And because of not securing the baby crawls on the grass outside of the shade and explores around. She’s a walking and falling mess- but with a joyous and jolly laugh, whenever she falls down she gets back up and carries on walking. In her onesie she’s playing on the floor by laying down, scampering around, attempting to stand up- she’s like a dog and it doesn’t help when Chenle notices Daegal too surrounding the baby and playing with her.
Her loud squeal in pain causes him to snap his head away from the screen and to her. She wails out after stomping with her hand on the sprinklers and the water splashes on her, and Daegal joins in barking at the sprinklers when it starts spluttering out water. Chenle tsks and ignores her crying, placing his air pods on focusing on his work. That wasn’t his problem… but at the same time he can’t help but be cautious of her moves. “Chungdae!” He yells out.
With no success in getting Chungdae to come and get the baby, Chenle continues with work and ignores the child almost entirely. It’s not until she finds her way back in his line of vision under the shade and sitting down on the wooden floor playing with things, assembly Daegal’s toys does he sigh out. He doesn’t care about her, he only cares that the baby was disturbing his peace and has somehow been set free to move around the house. Where’s Yezi? Where’s Chungdae?
Meanwhile Areum in her own world attempts to stand and walks a few steps only to tumble on the ground in her onesies, what catches his eyes is that every time she’d fall there would be a smile on her face, and unknowingly a smile would also be on his face for a spilt second. He tries as best as he can to overlook the little baby girl, but she makes it so hard, when slowly but surely she moves closer to him.
The next to time he looks away from the screen, she’s standing by leaning on the table bouncing to inaudible music. Upon getting his attention, Areum smiles and moves by hurriedly walking to the chair where he’s sitting and leans on his leg.
“No, no.” Chenle scolds. “Don’t touch me.” Chenle shoves her hands off his thighs.
Areum can only sit on the ground while looking up to the older man with wonder in her eyes. Her eyes that are just so precious and almost melt Chenle’s heart, but his quick in shifting away. In shifting away she only gets closer to him before yawning and rubbing on her eye in a messy state.
She gets back up and holds onto his thigh while minding her own business and playing with Daegal’s toy. Chenle tries not to shove her away, afraid he’ll hurt her but at the same time his eyes constantly move to her wondering if she’s okay.
She’s banging the toy on his thigh and making gurgling sounds while playing with herself, leaving Chenle to simply work and not mind her.
However, after some time, she grows quiet, and still while balancing on Chenle, she slides down his leg and leans her head on his leg. Chenle notices this and tentatively shakes his leg. “Hey,”
Areum looks up, her eyes blinking and wipes on them before making herself comfortable again on his leg. He leans back on his seat after a certain time and looks at her. Her posture looks bent and surely uncomfortable but it doesn’t stop her from sleeping. It’s when her neck starts wobbling and craning does he find his arms stretching down and his hands carrying and lifting her fazed sleepy state.
“You’re heavy,” He mummers before she hurriedly fixes herself comfortably in his hands by laying her body on his chest and her head against the croak of his neck. Chenle is stiff for a minute, and snaps out of it when feeling his dog by his foot. Looking down he sees Daegal wrapping herself in a ball and making herself comfortable. Chenle leans back on his seat and gently rests his hand on the baby’s back, the other arm holding her in place.
He soon finds himself dozing off after listening to the commentary with ear pods in his ear and his vision blurring while he succumbs to the sleep.
“Mum? I can’t find Areum anywhere,” Yezi looks panicked when waking up her mum. Chungdae blinks in haziness but after hearing Yezi’s concern she’s up on her feet.
“She was sleeping with me,”
“Well where is she?” Yezi in heaps of fright dashes out the room and continues to search all over the house, calling her name. She even gets upset that the house is so big. The only place she ever spent time with Areum was on the second floor where her room was- but after searching the entire second floor her heart is in frantic panic when looking all over. “Areum?”
In seeing Daegal stretching by the outside porch door and entering the house- Yezi scampers towards the door being breathless hoping to see her child. But her eyes are too stunned to move when she takes in the sight right before her. Right underneath the shade of the veranda, she sees her dad carrying her baby. The sight itself is wholesome with her dad’s eyes closed and embracing her child in such a manner of protecting her. Her heart fills up with an overwhelming longing. Seeing this sight only enlightens her.
Despite having non-verbal communications with her dad, Yezi had a slight assurance that her father still cared about her every time he paid for her private lessons with the tutor, every time he gave Chungdae money to give her, or even the little moments when he’d stoke up on her favorite foods whenever they’d run out. Despite not talking, Yezi knew that her dad still cared for her. And seeing this sight of him holding her child, gives her some sort of hope. Ever since Areum was born, Chenle never ever held her and refused to do so even in private when Chungdae would ask for help.
But now seeing how comfortable her baby is sleeping on her dad makes her smile. Deciding not to interrupt them, she moves back in the house and informs Chungdae that Areum is safe. After an hour or so, Chenle is awakened when Chungdae lightly tries to get Areum off his sleeping figure. He finds himself holding tighter onto the little girl, but eventually slowly let’s go, nodding his head when Chungdae states that her nappy is full. However, much to Areum’s distaste and drowsy state- refuses to let go of Chenle and holds tighter even whimpering out for the touch of the man who rarely holds her.
“What do you wanna do again?” Chenle asks, while removing his earphone and seemingly looks a little more awake then before. Especially when noticing that the child doesn’t want to let go of him.
“I want to change her diaper, it’s full and she’s gonna get rash,” Chungdae tries again to pull Areum off and Chenle gently tries to stretch her towards his wife, but Areum cries only resulting in Chenle holding onto her again.
“Okay, okay, it’s okay, let’s go,” Chungdae is surprised when seeing Chenle stands up with the child and they both embark inside the house going up the stairs. All this while Chenle holds onto an awake yet sleepy Areum and pats her back lightly. “Where’s Yezi?”
“Studying in her room, we can just go to our room,”
Chenle nods his head and upon getting to their room, he carefully lays Areum down while assuring the little wailing baby of his presence by playing with her hand while Chungdae begins removing her clothes and changing her. Her whimpers die down when Chenle holds onto her hand and playfully tells her it’s okay. “It’s okay, it’s okay, it’s just a nappy change,”
Chungdae hurries on to changing and cleaning the baby, but at the same time she pays attention to how Areum watches Chenle in awe and silences down whilst smiling and being entertained by him. When she’s done and dresses Areum in another onesie, Areum being tired yet awake and seemingly just staring at Chenle warms Chungdae’s heart.
“What’s wrong with her?” Chenle gently asks while lying on the bed and looking into the young baby’s black eyes. “She’s tired but she doesn’t want to sleep,” Chenle whispers.
“She can’t stop looking at you, at her grandfather,” Chungdae whispers back.
Despite Chenle not liking that word especially used for this child… his heart can’t help when he sees just how much curiosity is in the little girls’ eyes. “Sleep,” he smiles lightly when her features get into a drowsy sleep but her eyes are quick to open to make sure that Chenle is still in front of her. “You won’t miss anything. I’ll still be here. Sleep okay,” Chenle adjusts his posture on the bed to be at the same level as her while he also makes himself comfortable. Soon enough, after much ogling Areum falls asleep.
In Chungdae’s head, the little girl just wanted to take in this special moment of her bonding with her grandfather and didn’t want to miss out on seeing his face close to hers.
And for a few more days, although its scarce to see Chenle with Areum, Areum feels a tad bit comfortable in always approaching him. Whether by running to him whenever her mum would chase her and tell her it’s time to bath, or even by following Chenle around once she’s spotted him. In all honesty, at first it was annoying for Chenle to be followed by the miniature creature bastard child. However, he got used to her petite figure and he’d always be cautious of her movements. Chenle purposely acknowledges her and on other days it seems like he’s almost waiting for his chance to pick her up. And always waits for the signaling. It can be Chungdae asking for help with the little girl, and Chenle simply carries her and holds her while Chungdae works. Other times it’s when he gets back from work and already sees the baby crawling on the floor but when seeing him she attempts to stand and scampers in his direction.
Yezi only having seen the sight once, is surprised when one day, a Saturday, her dad is at home instead of being at work. And it so happens that when Chungdae leaves the house to go to the market, Areum won’t stop crying while Yezi is studying.
“Areum, please stop crying.” Yezi slightly raises her voice being upset. She stands up and bobs on Areum while holding her notebook in the other hand and tries to study, but Areum carries on crying. “Areum!”
That only makes Areum wail out more even going as far as hitting her mum wanting to get down.
“Areum what do you want!? I just wanna study-”
“Hey, hey, hey.” Chenle opens up the door stepping into the room cautiously. “What’s wrong?” He asks while struggling to hear through Areum’s screeches.
“I just wanna study but Areum keeps crying, I gave her milk and food, gave her bath but she won’t stop crying, I don’t know what to do and mum isn’t here-” Yezi herself also looks like she’s on the verge of crying, both from stress of the exam as well as her crying baby. She’s so overwhelmed by her emotions that when her dad offers to watch over Areum, she agrees without a second thought and continues studying while her dad shuts the door and disappears with Areum. It’s only when she’s calmed down and easily studies does she realise that her dad actually spoke to her in a somewhat decent conversation and even offered to take Areum.
Her heart, for a second, seems like it stops beating because of the shock that just happened. Carefully, no longer being interested in studying and wants to see with her own eyes, she walks out her room and tries to spot her dad with her child. She moves all over the house and even outside, but when she doesn’t see her dad, she panics and before she can even call out to them both- she’s surprised when seeing Chungdae block her mouth looking ecstatically pleased and happy. Gently pulling Yezi to the kitchen, they’re both caught in a trans of watching Chenle and the baby.
Chenle is holding on Areum on one side of his hip while holding a piece of a pineapple on a fork. He nibbles only a little and then moves the fork towards Areum. Areum sucks on the fruit and backs away with a sour look on her face just as Chenle moves the fork back silently laughing at her reaction. However, when Areum pounces on and eagerly tries to grab the fork from Chenle’s other hand with extreme force.
And it seems that it’s through that one little moment that a serene feeling of joy passes through the house for everyone. It’s through Areum that somehow the sense of ‘family’ began making sense again. As days pass, it seems like all the family wants to do is build their life and remain connected and not look back anymore. They each continue to strive in building a better life for themselves, Chungdae as the joy of the house continues to encourage as well as bring the family together, Yezi as a persistent graduate embarks on a journey of making her dad proud as well as herself and her baby, Chenle rightfully taking the head in making sure that this time his family is safe and that nothing can hurt them. At the same time, Areum grows in the love and embrace of all her family.
And Areum’s first word much to all their surprise is “Gwanpa”. Chenle never knew the excitement he’d feel when hearing the form of words leave the little girl’s mouth, his little bean. And hearing the word from her mouth, makes him wish that his whole family be together and that he’s willing to reconcile with Dae. No matter what. Which is why, when he sends her an email years later, he’s heart is open to accept whatever the outcome is- but he mostly leans onto the best. He hopes that his daughter Dae, will come back to him.
Especially since she approves his email and accepts his invitation, asking if she can come with her boyfriend who’s helped her get back into shape. Chenle at first is surprised with joy to hear from his daughter, but his surprise turns to stun when he learns who she’s been dating and spending time with for the past years. But all in all, he figures that it’s time to let bygones be bygones, especially within their 5th year, a parole letter from the court comes in and asks whether or not they’ll accept Donghyuck’s appeal for parole.
“Do you think that’s a good idea?” Chungdae asks while sitting next to her husband on their bed late at night, as they stare at the email together.
Chenle inhales in deeply, re-reading his email before nodding his head. “We’ve moved passed the past and all I want to do is move on. I’m sure from his appeal he won’t be a bother to us. And I sure as hell don’t want to receive emails about them anymore. Granting his parole as well as accepting never to receive emails like this again, will allow our family to finally have the peace we’ve been seeking for. Nothing bad will happen,”
Once Chenle sends in the email, the receivers are prompt to already writing up Donghyuck’s release paper’s and setting up for him to leave within a 5-day notice.
S2:EP7-14
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[5 days later: Thursday 9h30 a.m.]
Donghyuck is up and refreshed before anyone else in his cell. His eyes are trained on the barred windows to the light pouring out of the clouds. This is the day he would step foot outside of this damn prison in hopes never to return again.
“Can’t believe you’re leaving so soon,” Mark mumbles looking up to Donghyuck from his bed. Still being under the covers he watches his friend who’s got bruises on his nose, chin and cheek bone, but still his enthusiasm spreads all over his face. “You’re a free man but you’re already looking so beat,”
“Fuck off Mark.” Donghyuck runs his hands through his head taking a seat on his own bed. His head running free and wild with thoughts. But the one thing that’s pressing his head is that he never wants to come back to prison again. He misses his mum (who has not been sending in her letters to him), he misses Renjun who he heard from the ward guards that he was released 3 years ago. He misses his family, and he knows that they might not be too excited to see him when he gets back, but he wants to show them just how much he’s changed in his mindset. He wants to try and be the son his mum has always wanted, and he wants to be a big brother to Renjun, but most importantly, he wants to live his life the right way. “Even though I’m fucked up, I want to live honestly,” He whispers out.
Mark scoffs and rolls his eyes. “You’re all talk but, you’ll be back here before you know it. There’s going to be something that will just piss you off and make you go crazy,”
Donghyuck tries not to pay attention to Mark and only focuses on the positive, and he gets relieved when he hears his prison cell buzzer ring and looks up to the door that has a square space with bars. Seeing the officer Park Jisung call his name, Donghyuck eagerly stands up placing his hands behind his head as procedure. Officer Park Jisung gets in the cell accompanied by another guard (who stands like a guard dog and watches Mark and the other prisoners making sure that they don’t try and move). Jisung pulls Donghyuck’s hands down and into handcuffs. “Good morning Lee Donghyuck. My name is Officer Park, I’ll be in charge of settling your release papers and getting you out of here. Any questions you have will have to wait until we get to the holding center.”
Donghyuck feels relief wash over him that his appeal had been approved and that he can hear his freedom being doors away. He thought surely that he’d be rejected, but much to his surprise they granted him freedom.
“Why’d they say yes?” Donghyuck asks regardless of what Jisung said.
“Any questions you may have will have to wait until we get to the holding center.” Jisung repeats sternly.
This makes Mark snicker a little while watching his friend being taken away. Donghyuck looks back to Mark with a formidable smile. “Good luck Mark,”
“See you soon bro,” Mark winks his eye and breathes out when their door is banged shut causing the metallic locks to seal up the door again. “I’ve gotta get out of here,”
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The metal gates containing the prison facility closes after Donghyuck steps out. He takes a look back to the buildings that enclosed him and kept him for 5 years. He rubs his wrists looking up to the hot sun taking in the air of his new freedom. Finally, he’s out.
He expects to see his mum as usual, yet when there’s no sign of humans around the area he hangs his jacket behind his back before looking left and right and beginning his walk.
By the time Donghyuck’s legs wear out and he’s tired both physically as well as mentally, he stops by a gas station hoping to make a phone call. He barely has enough coins to make a calling, but he manages with the little he has. He leans by the wall and taps on the memorized phone numbers calling on his mum.
Thankfully the phone clicks. “Hello?”
“Mum,” Donghyuck’s voice is raspy but it can’t contain his own happiness when hearing his mum’s voice. She doesn’t sound sick.
“Oh,” Her voice fades. “Donghyuck is that you?”
“Yes, uh, I got released today,”
“I was aware.”
There’s a moment of silence that passes between them, with Donghyuck waiting eagerly to hear her voice but yet she doesn’t reciprocate his enthusiasm. Sensing that she’s not going to speak he speaks before his minutes run out. “Uhm, I was wondering…if you could let me stay over at your place…” He scratches the back of his head, feeling small and crushed that his mother doesn’t sound pleased to even hear him. “Just until I can find a place to stay,”
Her silence lasts long only causing Donghyuck to worry.
“Please…please mum?” He begs. “I… I won’t stay long. Please, I promise to be on my best behavior, I-”
“You have less than 1 minute.” The operating voice cuts in between, causing Donghyuck to curse. When the line connects again, he waits a bit to hear from his mum, but she still doesn’t speak.
“Okay fine. Just for tonight.” Donghyuck lets out as a last resort. “I’ll be gone in the morning.”
Just when Donghyuck isn’t expecting his mum to accept, she does. “Fine. But we changed the address. Right now, I’m at work, Renjun will arrive in an hour or so, you’ll have to wait outside. We no longer live in 84 Guryong. We’re in Estate Pent Thirty-f-”
“Shit.” Donghyuck tries to look for pocket change to carry on the call, but it hangs and he curses. “Fuck.” A few seconds of rest leads to him looking at the street map outside the gas store to find the address the his mum mentioned. “Estate Pent…” His eyes widen slightly seeing that the new residence is in an area whereby he’s never lived in.
It’s also quite far from where he is. He takes a deep breath and begins walking…
“Need a lift?”
Donghyuck’s ears are alert when hearing a voice. He looks behind him to a guy smiling at a girl. The girl continues walking minding her own business and not focusing on the guy who tries desperately hard to get her attention including whistling. Donghyuck breathes out a chuckle. “Still a dick.”
Jungwoo much to his own dissatisfaction rolls his eyes when the girl ignores him. “Fine. Go away with your flat ass,”
“I gotta advice you bro, chasing chicks decades younger then you will lead you to prison,” Donghyuck speaks loud enough to get the attention of the male in the car. Jungwoo peers to the voice and instantly a smile coats his face.
“Ehy, the boy who went to prison,” Jungwoo stops his engine and gets out the car just as Donghyuck walks over to the man. They get into a bro hug doing a little handshakes before Jungwoo goes all in for a hugr causing Donghyuck to stand in shock before he pushes Jungwoo off him. Jungwoo laughs it off fixing his cow boy hat on his head looking jolly. “Man, how the hell are you out? Did you escape? ‘Cause I know for sure your sentence was much longer then this? Where’s your other half by the way? You hungry? I was heading to lunch, come on. There’s a new joint that opened up serving amazing lobster- you know what it can be my treat, order and eat as much as you like. It’s good seeing you, the streets have been crazy with this boy by the name of Shotaro being all over the place causing havoc on every territory. Thank goodness you’re back, you can teach him a lesson. Wait, did I actually tell you about Sungchan? He was sentenced life in prison just yesterday, but wait that brings me back to you, how are you out? How-”
One thing Donghyuck liked about his old friend Jungwoo was how he always did the talking and never really allowed anyone else to talk but himself. He’d not only ask questions, but he’d answer his own questions and most of the time Donghyuck thinks that Jungwoo doesn’t really care about anyone’s opinion because he’s always talking and likes hearing his voice. So Donghyuck simply sits in the front seat, resting out his legs and allowing his seat to recline backwards so that he can take time to breathe in from his heavy walking. Hopefully when done eating, he’ll set the street address of his mum’s new place.
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After a heavy and amazing meal, Donghyuck is seated outside on a bench in the park under a tree facing in the direction of a clean and solid apartment building. Not only did it reside in a well off area, but the people themselves walking in and out of the apartment looked stable. At first he wanted to go in, but seeing how he was dressed in dark clothes from the night of the accident, he knew that the guards wouldn’t let him in. So now he sits outside, waiting for Renjun or even his mum to show up.
He waits for a really long time until his eyes squint a little by the appearance of a person which resembles Renjun. However, this person has got short black hair, looks angry and is dressed in all black clothes… well his jersey is a mixture of black and white stripes, but it sure as hell makes him look so different.
“Renjun!” Donghyuck yells out the name of his brother. There’s a fleeting happiness that gets upon Donghyuck’s heart when seeing the boy. Just two days ago, he reminisced on the feelings of how he felt for disappointing Renjun. So seeing him causes him happiness. He stretches his legs and begins moving towards the exit of the park going over to Renjun who stands frozen looking at Donghyuck as if it’s a horror movie. “Hey,” Donghyuck greets with a wholeheartedly.
However, Renjun is anything but cheerful. Up close, there’s a permanent resting scowl on his face, and with the short hair Donghyuck can see the faint lines of wrinkles which help to make Renjun look even more angry. “What are you doing here?”
Donghyuck is confused by the tone tilting his head with a confused face. “What’s up with the glum face?”
“You didn’t answer my question.” Renjun remarks looking closed off. “What are you doing here?”
“Mum gave me the ad-”
“The hell she did.” Renjun says distastefully. “Why’re you out? Didn’t you have a full sentence of 15 years?”
Donghyuck tries not to get angry, by holding in his tongue and poking it on the corner of his lip. “You also don’t want me here?” It’s clear how from his reaction that he also didn’t want him around. And to be fair, Donghyuck can understand why, but the fact that Renjun doesn’t even look the least bit fazed makes Donghyuc upset. “Well I called mum and she said I could stay here for-”
“You’re not gonna stay here. Her health’s been good for the past years now, she doesn’t need stress in her life anymore. Neither do I, so go back where you belong behind bars and out of everyone’s hair.” Renjun gives Donghyuck a dirty look before walking past him.
Donghyuck is quick in stopping his brother by the arm before looking to him. “Look Renjun. I’m sorry-”
“Save it. And leave me alone.” Renjun yanks his arm away. “I don’t care if she gave you the address, you’re not getting in. Find another place, in fact consider yourself cut from our lives. We don’t want you here.”
Donghyuck is about to comment out he has no right to speak, but he holds his tongue shutting his eyes tightly when thinking of just how much he tried his best to change in prison. If he continues to allow his tongue to be the master of everything, he’ll end up in prison again. Which is why he lets Renjun go. He stands in place and sighs, before going back to the park and sitting down on the bench with his brain raging but seemingly trying to remain calm. He reminds himself, that he deserves Renjun’s anger. But mostly Donghyuck fears just how much prison has changed his brother. Not only appearance wise, but internally as well. The Renjun that Donghyuck remembers was timid and always on edge, was always looked down upon and was a whining coward. This Renjun is gritty, unwavering, strong minded and angry. Donghyuck can blame it on the prison experience and also with the fact that he may or may not be his brother’s favorite person right now- but damn he’s changed so much. Was this his behavior everywhere, or was it only because Donghyuck was there. Whatever it is, Donghyuck hopes that it’ll pass.
With all the time he spent in prison trying to change his ways and character, he can’t come home to everyone already given up on him. He wanted one more chance, to redeem himself as well as prove that he wasn’t an unlucky fuckup. He needed just one more chance.
And so when the afternoon rolls in and the sky changes colors from blue to a cream shade of orange, Donghyuck gets up when seeing the all too familiar posture of his mother. Donghyuck can already tell that so much has changed. He’s not only happy to see her walking strongly and with a smile on her face, but also she looks really good. She’s dressed in a beautiful floral dress and her back is actually not hunched over. She looks strong. And that makes Donghyuck’s emotions flatter. Seeing his mother after so long causes him to be slightly emotional. Because he knows that soon, her smile will fade when looking at him.
It doesn’t even take a second for her smile to disappear upon noticing him crossing the street over to where she is. Her smile instantly vanishes when Donghyuck’s gaze meets hers. He tries not to break down, but the tears are already building up. His mum hates him. He can’t even look at her, as his eyes blur and he hates on himself for ever using her to the point where he takes away her smile.
However, when Donghyuck’s head hangs and he stops walking, his mum sighs sadly upon seeing her son. She slowly makes her way to him. When standing in front of him, her hand lands on his shoulder. He doesn’t look up and neither does she try to get him to look up. Honestly when he called, she just wished that she changed her number because she didn’t want to speak to him. And seeing him now, she thinks of how much worry he’s put her through. In all the times that he went to prison, she would work her hardest to try and help her son. Everyone called her names, called him names, and it tore her image not only as mother but a woman. Her son was her greatest embarrassment, but he was all she had. And despite the humiliation she’d go through, she still tried, she would drain herself day and night to get some sort of money to bail him out, some money to feed him, cloth him, help him start afresh because this was her son whom she loved so much. At some point, she even became religious and prayed for her son to change. She believed that he would change someday.
But that day, 5 years ago at the court room, she realized just how far gone her son had gone. He seemed beyond saving, and there was nothing she could do. When Donghyuck led Renjun to prison, something in her snapped. She didn’t want to be mother who failed. She knew she did nothing wrong and always corrected him, but his behavior was not a character she raised. So upon Renjun, beaten, in cuffs, accused, mocked and even humiliated- she saw herself in him. That day, her heart broke in ways that her abusive husband had never broken her before. Enough was enough. She needed to break free from the chains of being broken. All she wanted was strength and chance to set her life straight, so when they both went to prison, she was left alone and had been granted a chance to change her life. And when Renjun finished serving his sentence, she made sure that she would be strong for the son she didn’t deserve. She tried to be the mother she had always envisioned herself to be. And thankfully, day by day with a grateful son in her corner she slowly regained the strength she had lost, she became into a better and healthier version of herself.
With a good son in her corner, who always took care of her, reminded her everyday why she was special, she knew that her life was finally making sense. Life was supposed to be this way. And she never wanted to let this moment go. But now standing in front of Donghyuck, her son, her past- she’s expecting to be warm and welcoming to him, but she can’t find it in herself to even smile for her son. But as a way of moving on, she rubs his back. “You’re staying for tonight. You leave in the morning.”
Donghyuck tightens his jaw and nods his head. His heart broken. But he can’t say anything as he feels the lump clogging his throat. He ends up walking, following behind her. The guard is alert when seeing Donghyuck, as hours before Renjun warned him not to let him in. “Good afternoon Mrs Lee,”
“Hi Chanyeol,” She smiles warmly. “Any letter for me?”
The man smiles and shakes his head, always being kind and friendly to the middle aged woman who had nothing but a big heart whenever seeing him. “No, your son took them up,” Chanyeol clears his throat motioning to Donghyuck. “He informed me that, I shouldn’t let the gentleman in.”
She looks back to Donghyuck who still had his hand holding on his leather jacket. Sighing, she turns back to Chanyeol and shakes her head. “I’m guessing he was upset right?”
“Very,” Chanyeol smiles politely. “Haven’t seen him that angry before.”
“Hopefully it’s short lived,” She motions behind her. “This is a guest, he’s only visiting for the night, so don’t worry,”
It’s more than a blow for Donghyuck when he hears his mum calling him a guest. Did he really lose her trust? He tries not to say anything and follows behind his mum who makes her way to the elevator of the polished looking apartment.
Donghyuck doesn’t look around and simply keeps his head down, his own thoughts weighing him down. There’s a feeling of loneliness that engulfs him in anger, but he refuses to display or manifest it. He’s so deep in his thoughts that he doesn’t even hear his mother who speaks. “Have you eaten?”
Hearing the silence, she’s reminded of how her son barely even spoke to her decently in the first place, and so she doesn’t even try to create small conversation with him when entering the elevator. They make it to the 7th floor and Donghyuck follows behind until his mother stops by a door.
Before even opening the door, Donghyuck’s nostrils sniff the scent of a delicious aroma. Hearing his mother laugh, he looks up when seeing the door open revealing a delighted looking Renjun. “Guess what I made? Come in quick before it gets cold, I just took it off the stove now,”
She unlocks the gates and walks in, allowing for Donghyuck to follow in the lively lit home. It feels like a home with all the warmth and love. Already he feels out of place, but there’s nothing he can do but follow in. His mum closes the gate behind still chatting on with Renjun who disappeared somewhere. Donghyuck turns his head to the walls, seeing portraits and pictures of just her and Renjun. There are some medals hung on the wall and trophies as well. “Wow,” He mutters underneath his breath.
The entrance of the house is a narrow hallway, leading to a living room and there’s a door on the side for the kitchen. Donghyuck follows his mum who enters the kitchen. He stands by the doorway watching his mother walking to the stove where Renjun is. The kitchen is large enough that it even has a table and four chairs around it.
Donghyuck wants to walk in- but the moment the lively chatter stops between his mother and Renjun- he looks up. And just as he guessed, Renjun has stern cold eyes fixed on him. “What the hell.” He mutters and peaks at his mum. “You let him in?”
“Just for tonight sweety, he said he’d be gone by the morning,” She gives him a pat on the back.
“But why’d you let him in?” Renjun’s shoulders slump and he crosses his arms. “I thought you said you’re done with him?”
“Renjun, please,” Donghyuck notes how she tries to calm Renjun down by holding onto the sides of his arm. “I know what I said, but it’s just for tonight-”
“I hate to break it to you mum, but that’s how it always starts. You let him stay the night, and the next thing we know he’s out and about causing trouble and continues hiding out here until we’ve got a whole bunch of unwanted debt collectors and police officers barking down on the door-”
“Renjun.” She calls earnestly. “Don’t talk like that, stop it. He’s your brother you-”
“He’s your son, not my brother. He never was.” Renjun drops his arms and turns back to the stove causing for Donghyuck to poke on the side of his mouth with his tongue, while he watches his mother look nonchalant. “I only made enough for you and me.” Renjun turns around and begins plating his meal as well as for his mum. Before he takes a seat grumpily eating on his food.
“You’ve gotten awfully comfortable-”
“And you’ve outstayed your welcome and family privileges.” He sharply remarks glaring at Donghyuck. “You’re making everyone uncomfortable, do us a favor and just-”
“Renjun.” A warning tone leaves their mum’s lips. “Eat your food.” She inhales sharply running her hand through her hair. “Are you hungry Donghyuck?”
He only ate the meal that Jungwoo gave him in the morning, and even if he kind of felt hungry, he didn’t want to. He shakes his head. “It’s okay you can enjoy your food. Uh, while moving did you take any of my stuff-”
“Yes-”
“I threw them out.” Renjun cuts his mum off. Her gaze that penetrates the back of his head is strong in shock. “They were an omen and reflection of bad luck.”
“Renjun-”
“You know what,” Donghyuck grates his teeth before biting on his lip. “Fuck this. I’m leaving.”
“Donghyuck-”
Donghyuck shakes his head pulling his leather jacket back on and moving the door. He opens it only to be stopped by the gate.
“Donghyuck don’t leave.” His mum carefully holds onto his arm looking disheartened. “You said you’d stay for the night-”
“I’m not wanted here anymore, clearly, so just fucking open the gates and I’ll be out of your life forever. You wanted me gone anyway, so I’ll do you a favor and leave.”
“Donghyu-”
“Mum please.” Donghyuck stresses out through his teeth closing his eyes feeling the tears. “You’re clearly fucking healthy and you look great. I don’t want to fuck things up again, so just please open the gates. I’ll go and I promise not to fucking disturb you again.”
For some reason, that only makes her heart hurt. “Just for tonight- I’ll make dinner, please-”
Donghyuck shakes his head and wipes his eyes before forcing his arms out of his mother’s hands and walks back to the kitchen. “Come fucking open the gates or else I’ll break it open.”
“No need to tell me twice.” Renjun grumbles leaving his chopsticks and digging into his pockets bringing out keys. Renjun moves to the gates ignoring his mum who gives him upset eyes. Once he unlocks the gates, Donghyuck pushes past him and leaves.
“Donghyuck.” She calls once, but it’s useless when he turns the corner and instead of using the elevator takes the stairs all the way down.
The security guard, Chanyeol notes that Donghyuck is leaving and he doesn’t say anything.
Donghyuck is angry. Enraged by the stupid tears that clog his vision as he keeps walking away. He wants to hit something- to punch someone- to scream- to shout- to find some way to let his anger out- any other way except through tears. He finds his way back on the park bench underneath the tree as he holds his head in between his hands and stays silent. He sniffs here and there but he doesn’t cry. He allows for himself to feel the emotions of frustration. It’s the fact that there’s a whole in his heart and that he can feel it bleeding- it’s the fact that he wants to let it out but he knows that he can’t let it out without harming someone. But he doesn’t want to harm anyone- he doesn’t want to prove to Renjun or even Mark that he’s the same. Which is why when the first few come out, he doesn’t hold back and allows his shoulders to shudder and his voice to croak as he let’s out his emotions, his tears, his cry.
The whole night, Donghyuck covers himself in self-pity while contemplating on what to do in his life, where and how to try and live an honest life. Unlike when he was in prison, seeing his mother again made him realize that she’s always been there through thick and thin, even though he let her down she was everything a mother could be- he just never cherished her enough and that she was the only one. In her soul she would sacrifice for him to have the best in life…and because he took her for granted, he needed to let her know that he wants to make it right…he wants to touch her soul again, to at least bring a smile on her face. So before the early morning, he’s up from the bench and walks around the area. He cleans up his face in the public toilet washing his face and looking himself in the mirror giving himself some encouragement.
“I look so pathetic.” He mutters before leaving the bathroom.
Donghyuck doesn’t fret when the nearby stores don’t have any positions open, he doesn’t fret when he gets approached by some the old friends he knew who used to steal and sell on the sides of the roads, he walks away from them and persists on his journey to find work. It would’ve been easier if he didn’t get many employers asking for paperwork, degrees or even cv- it was even worse when they recognized him as someone who had a prison record, much worse when they didn’t know and they asked and he had to be honest with them. It’s hard work looking for a job, but just thinking of his mother allows him to try.
Day in and day out, Donghyuck finds himself barely making it through. On the first night he slept in the park opposite his mother’s apartment, but after much nights of sleeping on a bench- welcoming arms came from another homeless man who told him about a shelter that took in ‘straymen’ like himself. A nonprofit organization that helped to feed the needy and gave water once a week. He somehow got attached to the group of stray kids… homeless stray men who stuck together and would share everything they had with each other. Donghyuck didn’t fret when within a week, he found himself sleeping under bridges, on street corners and even sleeping standing up against a building. It wasn’t much, but he got work as a car washer. It wasn’t much because it wasn’t even professional as they’d randomly go up to cars by a traffic light and offer to wash windows. Not only washing cars but he got multiple side jobs; handing out newspapers, collecting any forms of plastic to get recycled and even helping people carry bags that were heavy.
It’s the most humiliated Donghyuck had ever felt, but as long as he was making money- he endured it. He just needed to reach his goal, to at least go to an internet café and forge out documents with his qualification. He didn’t make it far in school because of lack of funds, but Donghyuck did do side programs and got some degree. Even though forging out documents was wrong, Donghyuck had enough of being humiliated.
Together, on most days, he found himself attending ‘church’ with the group of stray kids who would go to pray.
When he thought of religion, he only thought of his mother. There was no one else committed like her when it came to going every day, praying every day and even giving in money she didn’t have. Donghyuck only came because it felt as a way to be close to her.
So he wasn’t expecting when one Sunday after the service he’d see a bright eyed woman waiting for him. His heart felt heavy for a second when seeing his mum standing and smiling. The automatic tears that seemed to only come when he acknowledged her. He looks behind him, wondering whether Renjun was around, because ever since he came out of prison she never smiled at him- so it wouldn’t make sense that 2 months later she’s outside with a warm smile.
Donghyuck scratches his neck and looks away already disqualifying himself from her gaze. Yet he freezes when hearing his name being called. “Donghyuck,”
His head slowly turns back to the spot whereby he saw his mum. His shoulders hang when he notices that she’s approaching him. He can’t even look at her in the eye knowing that he can’t contain the tears just as much as he can’t contain the anger.
Her eyes take in his appearance. He’s dressed in the same clothes that she last saw him in. Although his pants looked faded and bit dirty, his leather jacket was worn out and had some leather falling out. His hair was messy and looked combed down only with his fingers. Even though she’s not able to see his face, she can see how much weight he lost. Prison must’ve fed him well because when she last saw him he looked in good physical shape, but now he looks starved with his jaws smaller and face small. Her son…
It took one tiring, long and so heartbreaking conversation with Renjun, for her to feel so much anguish and guilt for neglecting her son. Despite all that he has done, he was still her son, and if she could protect one and groom him well, then surely she could try again with another. Especially when acknowledging that something was different about him.
“How was the service?” She asks warmly, her smile radiating joy as it covers her sadness.
Donghyuck clears his throat and looks back. Despite it being a welcoming place, he could sense the stares of the people around him and even with a message and word so strong, Donghyuck has never felt so empty before in his own life. His eyes turn back to the ground and he shrugs his shoulders not uttering a word.
This break his mother’s heart. Her son… “Are you hungry?”
Donghyuck sniffs back, blocking out the tears that attempt to fall. He hated how glum and gloomy he’s been feeling and he especially hates how his mother is here. “Uh, I actually have to get going.” Donghyuck doesn’t look to her when he turns around and carries on walking without stopping, even when she calls out his name on repeat. He shuts his ears and even runs- it hurts so much. His heart hurts so much, but he doesn’t allow himself time to grieve as he carries on his walk getting to the back of the shelter where he spent most of his days when he had nothing to do.
He busks on the ground sniffing and wiping his eyes trying to compose himself.
“Donghyuck-”
His head snaps up to the panting woman who holds onto her side bending down trying to catch her breath. “Mum? Did you follow me?” Donghyuck asks, panicked as he moves towards her but doesn’t touch her. “Why did you follow me? You could’ve hurt yourself,” Donghyuck stresses.
“I was trying to talk to you, but you just ran away from me.” She breathes out still hunched and trying to catch her breath. “I wanted…to talk to you, let me catch my breath,”
Donghyuck meekly stands back and watches her. She’s got on a long dress that end by her ankles, it’s black and she has a white cardigan over her dress. Her grey hairs are neatly tucked in a low ponytail. It brings Donghyuck, some form of happiness, when seeing that her health was booming and despite being tired, that she had strength. His only form of happiness was seeing his mum being well. Without him in the picture and with Renjun being by her side she regained the health that he had taken away from her.
“I can’t come back to you mum,” Donghyuck finds himself saying. “I’ll only cause you stress, and you’ll lose weight again, and you’ll get sick again because of me, and i… I don’t want to be responsible for your unhappiness and misery. All I’ve ever wanted was for you to be okay…and now that you’re well, I need to find my own way…you don’t need me holding you down,”
These are words to her ears. Hearing her son being so vulnerable causes her to recall of a time when she cradled him in her arms when he was just a child. She vowed that no matter what, she would protect him. Little did she know that his own way of doing things, were for her and not out of selfish reasons. She limps forward and holds her hand out. “Are you hungry?” She asks calmly looking up to him who still had eyes for the ground. “We can talk after you’ve had a meal. Are you going to deny my request to spend time with you?”
Donghyuck visibly hesitates and gulps before shaking his head.
When his mother takes him to a causal diner serving pastry, Donghyuck’s eyes light up when seeing all the meals but his eyes don’t linger long on the food as he focuses on the table. He was so hungry, he only ate once a week during a Thursday when the shelter people would come, but otherwise he lived on water from public fountains.
“What would you like, I’ll pay for it,”
Looking at the menu, Donghyuck looked for the cheapest bun which was a doughnut. “T-the simple doughnut,”
“Are you sure?” His mum asks looking at the menu seeing that it’s the cheapest and most plain. “Come on son, don’t be afraid. I’ve got more than enough,”
Donghyuck chokes up on the word ‘son’ but still shakes his head. “I’m not that hungry though. It’s alright you can eat,”
“The son I knew loved eating,”
“I just don’t want to waste your money. You can use it on something else,”
“I want to use it on you,” She tries to ensure, but the look on Donghyuck’s face showed that was adamant. Even though he didn’t say anything, she could see right through his façade. Something surely changed in her son.
The afternoon he left her house, she couldn’t shake off the guilt she felt for letting him leave. Even though she had a piece of mind without him, it’s the mere fact that he came to her and she turned him away. As his mother, her soul still ached for her son.
“We’ll have the lunch brunch,” She says when the waiter returns. Donghyuck’s ears perk but he says nothing. He waits for his mum to speak, but his nerves get the better of him and he’s legs begin to shake by the heavy silence.
“The pastor told me, that he had seen you a couple of times wandering the streets,” She speaks when noting his anxiety. “He asked me, why I had neglected you.” That makes her pause to take in her son’s fragile and vulnerable state. He looked neglected and deprived of a mother’s love. “His words hit me straight in the heart because he reminded me of all the prayers I made for you. Prayers for you to change, to become my son again, prayers for God to help you find your way. His words, reminded me why I shouldn’t give up on you.”
Those are words to Donghyuck’s ears, they even make him turn red.
“We can start over,” She proposes. “We can put the past behind us, and try again. Are you willing to try again? To rekindle our relationship?”
Donghyuck feels his neck growing hot, but he still manages to clear his throat uttering out a tiny ‘Yeah’ but he’s even afraid of confessing the words out loud just in case it’ll jinx his luck.
“I’m happy to hear that,” She smiles warmly again leaning over the table trying not to push his nervousness. “A position recently opened up in the place where I work. They’re looking for a janitor and security guard, two wedged type of work. I know it doesn’t sound like much, but it’s a private kindergarten school and they pay very well. If you’re interested, I can arrange the necessary documents for you, and put in a good word for you. I’m well-respected in the school, so I believe that despite your record, I can put in a good word and it’ll be enough to cover your past,”
- 2 Weeks later.
Donghyuck picks up the heavy green plastic of trash consisting of used but not limited to dirty recyclable materials, and walks out the classroom and onto the hallway that would lead to the playground field where all the different sets of dumpsters would be. After dumping the trash inside and closing the lid he digs into his pocket to his buttoned phone to check the time.
15:29.
Thirty more minutes until he could knock off. Upon walking back to the classroom, his eyes squint into the playground distance to the empty entrance gate- well not so empty. What catches his eye, is some sort of homeless looking guy in dirty black sweatpants and a faded out red coca cola t-shirt with holes, walking towards a child sitting on a bench. Donghyuck sighs and walks towards the entrance. His whole presence alone causes the homeless guy to deviate and part away crossing the street. The vulnerable child isn't even aware that she's been spared from danger as she continues humping on the bench. Getting a bit sexual and seemingly trying to reach her pleasure.
Donghyuck scratches his neck wondering if he should be stopping the child or tell his mum once again. Even though they still weren't on good terms, he promised to be on his best behavior if it meant his mum helping him out. Getting out of prison with a warrant wasn't easy at all, but not as much as it was to get a job of any kind with so many prison charges. Thankfully, Donghyuck's mother came to his rescue. She worked as a day care teacher assistant and their school was in need of a cleaner. It wasn't a luxurious position, but Donghyuck took it just to prove to his mother that he was serious in mending their relationship.
So being a 'janitor' his main responsibilities included getting on the school grounds early, cleaning up classes when students were not inside, disposing of trash and waiting until the school day was over and all the kids went home to clean again. Those were his responsibilities, but it became tough when parents didn't pick up their kids on time at 13.00. Donghyuck hated when parents would fetch their kids late. Reason being, because he'd need to make sure that the school was 100% empty before him to go home. And if it was not 100% empty, then he wasn't allowed to go home.
Getting closer to the bench, Donghyuck notices the child seating down yet rocking her hips back and forth on the bench- almost grinding herself on it. The sight is perverse. However, for Donghyuck, he'd gotten used to only one of the day care students who was consistent in grinding on anything and everything when she was bored. Areum.
Making himself more visible to the young girl, Donghyuck sits on the bench next to her. Her motion stops and she peers to the elder sitting next to her, a bright smile coating her lips. "Hi Mr Sunshine!"
"Hey Kid." Donghyuck greets in a mumbling tone making the girl chuckle. “What?” He asks when looking down at her.
“I have a joke,”
“Go for it,” Donghyuck sighs, already knowing she’d bring another terrible pun joke. She loved doing that for some reason.
Areum giggles and looks up to Donghyuck. “A book fell on my head when I was in the library. I guess I only had myshelf to blame.” She begins giggling. “Did you hear the joke about the little mountain? It was hill-arious!”
“I’ve got one,” Donghyuck finds himself saying. “What do dogs do when they need a break while watching a movie?”
“What?”
“They put it on paws.” Donghyuck shakes his head smirking when the little girl begins dying of laughter. A little back and forth of her terrible puns fills the silent, but after some time she becomes silent. With his hands in his pocket and peering down at the girl who slowly continues to grind herself again, Donghyuck sighs. "Where's your parent?"
The child blinks causing Donghyuck to internally roll his eyes groaning lowly. This job really tested his patience especially when talking with kids.
"Where's the person who's going to fetch you? You mum or dad or guardian?"
"Oh! Mummy's at work." She says nodding her head. "Uncle Jung is going to fetch me."
Donghyuck nods his head allowing the silence to take over. However, his attention draws to the girl once again when she rocks her hips back and forth again. It's not the first time she's done this, however, every time that she does it, Donghyuck feels slightly uncomfortable. He's caught her on this bench all by herself on multiple occasions grinding for pleasure, not only the bench, but sometimes in class as well, on her chair. Donghyuck just wonders what exactly is going on in her head, while she literally dry humps the bench.
"Why are you doing that?" Areum peeks up and blinks her eyes. Donghyuck breathes out. Not wanting to say foreign words or words she's never heard before, he motions with himself and dry humps the bench similar to what she was doing. Areum catches on and smiles.
"It's a secret!" She leers. Despite her words, she seems excited to share the so called secret. And Donghyuck takes advantage of that, throwing his best cunning and charming personality.
"Can I know the secret?" Donghyuck asks with a pretense stunned face, being cunningly friendly. "I thought we're friends?"
"Okay." Areum looks around skeptically. "It's a secret." And laughs. "Uncle Jung said I should tell no one, even if its nice."
Donghyuck's brows furrow. "What's nice?"
Areum laughs covering her mouth frantically. In Donghyuck's head she looks the happiest while trying to be cryptic. She stands up and jumps up happily before her fingers begin to move. Donghyuck's eyes widen when she lifts up her white skirt revealing her yellow panty. He hesitates for a second until he realizes that her hand fumbles and makes its way inside her panty. He's quick to taking her hands out while having a morbidly shocked face.
She giggles, being way too excited. "Let me show you."
The secret? The secret has something to do with an uncle and a child? This only makes Donghyuck widely panic. "Fuck,"
"Oh oh." She covers her mouth in sudden surprise. "Do you also play fuck like Uncle Jung?" Before a smile latches onto her face. A chill runs down Donghyuck's spine. "Uncle Jung said fuck is a game. It's my favorite game." She whispers out.
His eyes widen. In all his years of being in prison, he sorta had the chance to reflect on where he'd like to be once he's out. And right now, talking to this girl feels dangerous. It's a problem. And this is not what he wants at all. If he tells his mum, there might be a high case of him being in a feud with the family of the young girl's parents. At the same time because the daycare already don't like him, he and his mum might both be fired from god knows what- Donghyuck is aware of how much they're waiting for him to slip up. But yet, he can't stop himself from asking. "Can you tell me more about his game? I don't know it."
"Don't tell anyone. Not even Mrs Chittaphon. Or mummy. Only Uncle Jung and I play this game," She nods her head and smile. "It's a nice game. I get to sit on him and ride the horsey!"
Donghyuck's eyes burst out of their sockets. Just as his lips become dry. He clears his throat asking. "Does he remove your clothes?"
She shakes her head. "No." She smiles. That sort of makes Donghyuck cool down again, however he's still in edge by the word horsey and what exactly she rides or what exactly has he shown her. "Can I show you?"
Donghyuck shakes his head with a tight smile, feeling bad for the little girl who seems brainwashed. "It's fine, I don't want to play the game today,"
"Uncle Jung likes to play it after work," Areum smiles. And that literally breaks Donghyuck's heart. Such a small, sweet and innocent little girl being manipulated by a ravaging uncle wolf.
"What does he do in the game?" Donghyuck asks after gaining her trust by sealing his lips shut with an invisible key.
"He tickles me here." Areum points to a part in her skirt and that makes Donghyuck mad. The urge to telling his mum growing. "And does like this," using her middle finger, she surprisingly rubs it on her yellow panty causing Donghyuck to quickly hold her hand.
"Your fucking uncle is raping you." He can't hold himself back when he glares into her eyes while shaking his head.
"My playing uncle is raping?" She asks with a puzzled face. "What's raping?"
Donghyuck sucks in a breath, and with distress he runs his hands through his hair. Before he turns back to Areum his eyes latch onto a black vehicle pulling up on the street. "Shit. Hey sweet cheeks, I need you to listen alright. Don't tell Uncle Jung that you told me, okay?"
She instantly nods his head. "I won't tell him. He'll be angry with me. Don't worry Mr Sunshine, it'll be our little secret."
The black vehicle parks right in front of them, with Donghyuck creating some distance while Areum can't stop giggling at her secret. A man, smartly dressed in a suit with parted hair, steps out the car with a charming smile growing on his lips when Areum jumps from the bench running to him. Donghyuck stands up with his hands stuffing in his pocket.
"Uncle Jung!" Areum cheers hugging him by his legs. Upon hearing the name, Donghyuck's eyes do a double take towards the man. The man squats all the way down with an antagonizing friendly smile, and puckers his lips allowing for Areum to kiss his lips before she giggles like the naive little girl she is. She begins jumping up and down in place while the man stands. "Did you buy the toys?"
"My little puppy, I bought you so many toys for you to enjoy. They're gonna make you feel real good ," Hearing the voice of the older male, his underlying tone of condescension and how much authority he has over the little girl, Donghyuck can't help it when his fists tighten into a ball. His jaw clinches when the male with a charismatic smile grins his way. "She wasn't a bother was she?"
Donghyuck's jaw locks and he looks away, only making Jaehyun continue as if he didn't get ignored.
"Either way, thanks for keeping her company. "
Placing Areum in the backseat and placing her bag in the boot, the man known as Uncle Jung gets into his driver's seat and begins driving away. Donghyuck can only stand with his fists balled up as he watches the car stride away. In his head, although the situation was sickening, he already told himself he wouldn't get involved. His mum's reputation, as well as his own reputation was on the line.
"Poor girl." Donghyuck sighs walking back in the school to lock it up.
"Jaehyun, thank you so much for looking after her," Yezi smiles giving her boyfriend, Jaehyun, a peck on his lips looking up into his eyes while picking up Areum from the floor and positioning her on her hip. "I hope she wasn't a bother,"
"She's never a bother to me," Jaehyun smiles placing his finger over his lip causing Areum to giggle hiding her face in her mother's neck.
"Did you have fun baby?" Yezi asks with a dashing smile making Areum cheerfully nod her head.
"Yes mummy! Uncle Jung and I played together!"
"Yes we did. She's so obedient," Jaehyun has a proud smile looking at the little girl in her mummy's arms, before he looks back to her mummy. "Are you sure you don't want her to spend the night with me while you're on your family dinner? I don't mind, it's Friday."
"I really wish I could leave her with you, but my sister's coming for the first time in such a long. She'd really love to see Areum,"
"That's alright, my darling," Jaehyun pets on Areum's head puckering his lips waiting for her to place her lips on him and she does.
At first for Yezi it used to be weird that Areum allowed for Jaehyun to do that when she was very conservative with people, but after some time and after getting used to it, she found it adorable how Areum opened up to Jaehyun in so many ways. "Have fun alright my little puppy,"
"Okay Uncle Jung," Areum grins and waves her hand. “Bye-bye uncle Jung,"
"Bye puppy,"
"Mummy is your sister really coming?" Areum asks with hopeful eyes, causing Yezi to frantically nod her head. "I can't wait to see her! I have a joke for her?”
“Let me hear it,” Yezi laughs slightly while walking.
“What do dogs do when they need a break while watching a movie? They put it on paws.” Areum begins laughing hard when her mum laughs as well.
“That’s a good one,”
“Mummy are you happy?" Areum asks.
Yezi laughs and places Areum down so they can hold hands and walk in the house. “I’m so so happy,”
18:50
"How do I look?" Jeno asks for the upteenth time, nervously adjusting his long sleeved shirt into his fine ironed black suit pants. He clears his throat testing out his voice with the syllable 'ah'. Dae, standing in front of him with her hands on his shoulders, peers into his wandering eyes waiting for him to relax. "How do I look? Do I look good?"
"You keep asking me the same question?" She lightly smiles, finding his whole nervous state funny.
"That's because you haven't answered me," Jeno inhales and exhales.
"Well, the first time I said you look good, the second time I said you look charming, and the third time I said you look handsome, the fourth time I said you look spot on, and for the tenth time, I said you look, just fine babe." Dae ends up holding onto his fidgeting hands, giving her best smile radiating joy as she leans in close and embraces her lips upon his. Jeno freezes, yet he meekly indulges into the kiss. After a minute, she parts from him. "Baby, relax. It’ll all be alright."
He takes in a deep breath holding onto Dae's waist as he closes his eyes. Taking in another breath, he tries to calm down his nerves. Feeling Dae's hands against his chest, he feels reassured that nothing will happen today, because she is with him. “You look beautiful as always, but tonight you look really happy. I’m happy that you’re sharing this happiness with me,”
After several years- specifically 3 years of them dating, and of them living together and encouraging each other- Dae's father had finally had a change of heart in wanting to see and reunite with his daughter again, and meet the man she chose to love.
Although it happened about 5 years ago, the sight was deeply plunged into Dae's father, Zhong Chenle's mind. It's something that made him feel guilty and responsible for his children’s sufferings. The works of his hands, enclosed and trapped his daughters inside of a hell hole. But as years progressed, and Yezi's child, Areum, grew, he found his stone cold hateful heart slowly melt. The little baby girl looked so much like Dae. Despite being a child of a rapist, she inherited features of the family. Chenle couldn't help but warm up to the little girl whenever she called him 'gwanpa'. With his heart melting by the innocence of the child, he slowly got the strength to look his daughter Yezi in the eye and talk to her. The first few days were tough, as she had been longing and praying for her dad to finally notice her, but eventually she took the same pace as him and slowly they rekindled their relationship of father and last born. And this evening, Chenle was ready to open up his heart again, for his eldest daughter Dae and her new...boyfriend.
The first born, the first daughter of his family, the daughter which always shared her worries and joy with utmost elevation to her father, his first love ever since his ex-wife walked out on him. He wanted to reconnect with her, and never let her go again- even though she chose the path that she was on, he wanted to stand by her and at least try to be in her life again.
So as the sun sets and Chungdae walks around the dining room table adjusting the utensils and making sure the table was set and ready to eat, Chenle buttons up his traditional outfit and fixes his hair in the mirror.
Areum bounces around the room playing with the little dog Daegul, and from time to time looks up to her grandfather. "Gwanpa?"
"Yes my little bean," Chenle responds carefully pressing his hands down his clothes.
"You look nice." Her smile enlightens on her face when he turns around with a smile and picks her up.
"What did I tell you about that word ‘nice’?”
Areum giggles and stands straight. “Nice is dead. Gwanpa you look smart, and rich!” She cheers causing Chenle to smirk with pride.
“Thank you, my little bean." He tickles her stomach. "You don’t look too bad yourself, you look like a royal queen going to a ball,"
"Thank you gwanpa! Gwanpa I have a joke I want to tell mummy’s sister." She circles her hands around her grandfather’s neck as he carries her outside his room and down the stairs.
“She can’t take jokes easily,” Chenle suppresses a laugh when remembering how bad his daughter’s jokes used to be.
After the whole incident that went down and his house burning up, he made arrangements and building construction started again before he instantly moved from the secluded area and settled into a stronghold of fortification that was suitable for his status- in other words, he moved far away into a house of more wealth and power. Just like his previous home, it was situated on a barricaded hill, however instead of it being guarded within a residential gate, he hired his own secretary to look over the massive barricaded land that enclosed his mansion.
So as Jeno and Dae are driving along the road following the GPS signal of the new address of the Zhong Chenle residence, Dae instantly feels little, very tiny when coming to see her father. All that her father was able to achieve in his life time, all his inheritance, fortune, wealthy, position, status, level, money, all of it belonged to only him. A great man, with great power and authority.
"You have reached your destination." The GPS lady says.
Both Jeno and Dae's eyes are enlarged, dazzled and awestruck by the large high-end white concrete border building. "T-this is the house?" Jeno meekly asks. "Fuck me. We literally drove parallel to this wall and you're telling me, that this is the place?"
"There's the gate there," Dae notices the gate a distance away.
Jeno starts his little polished wagon and drives forward to the black high gates. He washed his car and polished it so many times, and even took it to the car wash and had it washed more than 5 times, all so that he could impress Dae's father and have him see himself as a suitable partner of his daughter. But now driving with his red wagon towards the gate, he feels worthless and poor all over again. Who did he think he had become? Just because he loved a rich girl and a rich girl loved him back- didn't make him rich all of a sudden. He was still a poor boy from nowhere.
Dae, seeing the distraught and down casted look shadow on Jeno's face, sets her hand on his thigh that nervously bounced up and down. He takes in a deep breath and presses his lips together when reaching the gate. The gate is completely black and doesn't give any view of what's inside.
Looking at the white wall that has a little black tinted window view, Jeno rolls down his window and awaits for the tinted window to open up. He sticks out his hand and presses on the little poll that had a little intercom.
"Hello?"
No response. Upon waiting for a response Jeno turns to Dae after a while. "Should I knock on the window?"
"No, wait, let me try and send my sister a message and see what we should do," Dae says, bringing out her phone and texts Yezi for the first time in 5 years, stating that she's outside. Yezi responds in a heartbeat making Dae feel much more relieved about there being no hard feelings between her and her family. No longer feeling awkward for being outside for more than 5 minutes. "Yezi says we should tell him our names and that we were invited by Mr Zhong."
"Alright," Jeno nods his head and takes a deep breath. "I suddenly don't feel like wanting to see your family,"
"Me too," Dae replies honestly chuckling lightly.
Living with Jeno, in his world, has really casted some kind of spell on her. From recovering from her overdose and intake of drugs, to being thankful for the hospitality she received from Jeno… the beauty of enjoying life at the expense of very little, is something she grew into. For so long, being away from a prestigious lifestyle, she got to appreciate and adore the simplicity of everything (even though she really had to adjust to many things, she enjoyed the simpler life). "I feel so small,"
Jeno opens up his palm looking into Dae's eyes with assurance. Dae places her tiny hand in his and he lightly squeezes it. They sit silently simply looking at the daunting gates of riches in which resides Dae's family.
"You know," Jeno gently speaks. "On that night, the night Mark, Haechan, Renjun and I invaded your house, we were actually sitting outside, in the car. We came when the sun was slightly still in the sky. We sat outside and watched your house as the sunset over it..."
Dae listens. To think that of all people to save her, Jeno would be the one who helped her escape a deadly fate only made her appreciate the good that was hidden in the rough. As much as she'd like to forget that horrible incident, she knew just how much more guilt Jeno felt every time he brought it up. It still kept him up, and as much as you wanted to heal from the night, Jeno as well wanted to heal from everything he had done that night. And it’s in moments like these when he speaks, you listen and allow him his moment to reflect, just as he allowed you to freely use him as much as you wanted so that you could heal. As he speaks, even though Dae has told him countless of times that she forgives him, Dae knows that every ounce of him wants to move on and feel forgiven. So she quietly sits, and listens. If he was going to forgive himself, she needed to always listen.
"The house, your house...was everything my brother and I always wanted. It was a palace, a fortress, four stories high, huge balconies, large veranda and just so homely. It was modern and even the air itself was something I'd never breathed in before. It was a home we've never had before." Jeno acknowledges. "I just wanted to see how it looked inside. I really wanted to know how the inside of a rich house looked like." Dae turns her head to him, when feeling his eyes on her. She moves between his left and right eye and he smiles. "You left a house that had more than 5 massive rooms, 2 spaciously large bathrooms and enormous backyards to literally cramp up with me in a one-bedroom apartment?"
"Spaciously is not a word and yes," Dae smiles lightly. "I left it all because it was all just material,"
Dae softly says smiling when Jeno leans closer and plants a kiss on her forehead. "Do you want something like this? Do you want materials again? Because I am promise you that I'll-"
"I only want you Jeno," She smiles when whispering softly. "I need you more than anything to survive in this world that was cruel to me. You're my home, and I really mean that. No materials on his earth can replace a soul that saved another soul,"
This time their breathing is in sync when they both embrace in a warm kiss, breathing in and out together allowing this moment to settle in. With their hands still clasped together as Jeno looks out his window to tell the guard who they are he’s stunned when the black metallic gates crank open in a slow manner and Jeno's head snaps to Dae who has her eyes on the road ahead. The gate is wide open with another path to follow, but Dae and Jeno are still in shock.
Jeno turns his head when a voice comes from the intercom. "Please move your vehicle inside the premises, Miss Yezi is waiting by the house."
“Miss Yezi?” Dae has a playful smile on her face. “Wow. I bet you she’s been treated like a princess,”
Jeno snickers while slowly driving his car past the gate and into the premises. The first thing that the couple takes note of, are the lights that are shining down on the pathway. Jeno and Dae's eyes are widely opened and are all over the large sets of trees that enclose the drive way- the long drive way with various gardened plants and flowers. It's absolutely breath taking watching the garden bloom with so much colors of wealth prosperity. In between the curvy path on the driveway, Dae's eyes look out by Jeno's side of his window to the slight view of the mansion that they were soon gonna get inside of.
Finally driving into one straight path, their view gets sidetrack by the large fountain statue of two angles pouring out water. Not only the fountain, but after passing another set of black gates that are already opened and rounding their car past the fountain, the lavish sight of the ever green garden with white little flowers enclose the garden really making the mansion seem like a heavenly fortress.
The houses theme is white. There are high pillars towards the front entrance of the house as well as arched pillars on each side that lead to different roads. Behind the pillars stand 3 large structures of the fortified mansion. The middle portion is the largest with a high double deck structure where all the windows are top to ceiling and are covered with gossamer curtains. The side building structures that are still connected to the middle portion are identical in terms of design and the layers of floors.
Stopping the car right by the side of the path, Jeno's mouth hangs open, not closing at the slightest. "At this point, your dad is trying to show off,"
"You don't say," Dae is marveled by the sight, that she doesn't notice her sister who walks down the lit up stairs heading towards their car.
Yezi's eyebrows furrow when neither of the people in the car get out. She stands there for a bit before walking towards the passenger’s door and knocking twice on the window- knocking both Jeno and Dae back to their senses.
Dae removes the seatbelt and laughs lightly. "This is it,"
"This is it," Jeno nervously says. "Best of luck to us,"
"We need that," Dae leans close to her boyfriend placing a light peck on his lips before opening up her door.
"Finally." Yezi states with a snickering laugh and a smile that eagerly begins to grow. "What was taking you guys so long? After I sent the message and you didn't come right in, I had to check with the gateman and he said the car was just there. But of course knowing you and your ever stubborn behavior, I knew you wouldn't tell the gateman anything,"
"Why should I? I'm my father's daughter, I don't need to introduce myself as a guest," Dae jokes being happy to see her sister. The tears sit on the brim of her eyes, and just like Yezi they instantly embrace each other in a tight hug. Yezi whimpers and holds even tighter.
“Dae,” She sniffs and can’t stop the tears from pouring out. “You look so good, I’m so happy toyou’re your beautiful eyebrows and hair being a beautiful black,” This only makes Dae laugh.
“Don’t remind me of those times,” Dae can’t stop laughing when hugging her sister. “Seeing you, seeing this house, dad outdid himself this time in making me feel bad,"
"Oh please, don't fuel up his ego," Yezi chortles shaking her head but still holding tightly onto Dae with her eyes closed. "He barely leaves the house now,"
Dae laughs at that patting Yezi's back. "Your poor freedom is gone,"
"Oh please, I can leave the house whenever I want," Yezi jokes out laughing with Dae. "I just need to take a bodyguard with me,"
"Bodyguard?" Dae's eyes widen and leans her head back still enclosing her sister in the hug. "Fuck, things have changed,"
"Language." Yezi's eyes widen. "We now refrain from cursing, I don't want my little girl latching onto that stuff,"
"Ncawww, Areum, right?" Dae squeals getting into the hug again as they both scream like little kids. "I can't believe I finally get to see her,"
"Dae! You have no idea how much I've missed this, missed us,"
Dae leans her head back with loving eyes looking into her sister’s teary eyes. "Don't cry bitch, if you cry you know my tears will flow out as well,"
"I know, but I can't help it," Yezi chuckles before sneakily landing a kiss over her sister’s lips. Dae is stunned for a whole minute before laughing out and squeezing Yezi into a greater hug again. After a minute of laughing and saying out their 'I love you', they finally part and Yezi's eyes go down her sister’s attire. "Oh my soul you don’t know how amazed I am by your eyebrows and your hair, and your body and your health! You look nourished and healthy and soo soo good! My sister is finally back!"
Complementing Dae's healthy figure, her black hair in curly waves tucked behind her ear to show off her twinkling earrings, stunning legs in a white tight dress that ends mid-thigh, matched together with a black long sleeved turtle neck inside, white daring heels and finally a tiny white purse.
Dae's hand goes down her dress and she models for Yezi with a joking tone. "I know, I know, I tried," Dae laughs acknowledging her sister and nodding her head. Jeno can only stand by his car smiling at how gorgeous Dae looks. This was the Dae that he always admired, and now that she recovered she looked as stunning as ever.
"I'm not even one to look at, you're wearing designer? Vera Wang?" Dae's eyes marvel at the designer black sleeveless dress that showed off her toned arms and a bit of her belly. And finally the black see-through flowing skirt that has a little tight black skirt inside and is long yet has a long slit up to her thigh.
Yezi also playfully models out and flips her hair. "I knew my sister was coming today, so I had to dress to impress," Yezi laughs.
“You killed it!” Dae encourages with sass making Yezi laugh.
“No you killed it!”
“I just wish I was somebody else to admire how we both killed it,” Dae flips her hair dramatically before Yezi holds onto her sister’s hand and leading her forward.
"Wait till you-"
Dae grips onto Yezi's hand tightly before motioning back to Jeno who is calmly standing like a doorman. When noticing the eyes of the girls on him, he quickly bows his head nervously, making Dae smile brightly. “My person here inspired me to kill it. Come on Jen baby,” Dae marvels and walks to him bravely intertwining their hands. “This is my sister, Yezi,”
“It’s a pleasure to meet you Yezi,” Jeno bows again maintaining a positive smile.
"Oh, hi," Yezi's tone simmers down but she tries to maintain the forced fake smile on her face. While Chenle was ready to give Jeno a chance, Yezi wasn't too fond of allowing her sister to be with a lowlife and someone who was involved in keeping them hostage. But aside that, she bows her head as well. "Wow you guys are matching." She takes in the view of Jeno's elegant face that comes out dashingly with his styled and parted hair that gives off a sense of superiority. His style of clothing consists of a white buttoned down long sleeved shirt and black suit pants with his polished dress shoes, and Yezi notes how he's standing and how humble he looks. He can try to look like them as much as he wants, but Yezi still had bitter feelings. "Well, welcome. Come on in," She smiles and stretches her hand out to the stairs leading to the mansion and eventually the people inside, that are awaiting them.
Dae stands close to Jeno, abandoning Yezi's hand to securely wrap it around Jeno's bicep. "Babe, you've got this. Just relax okay,"
When dressing up for the occasion, he thought he went overboard with the dress pants as he never wore suits too much- but seeing how Dae followed his lead and decided to dress up as well, he praises the heavens that they didn't second guess their outfit. What would've happened if they dressed in normal clothes?
Climbing up the lit up stairs together, Jeno and Dae are finally in front of the door.
The double doors are wide open and upon entering into the new ambiance of the home and removing their shoes, replacing them with the white slippers available, Jeno rubs his sweaty hands over his black pants and swallows a clump of saliva in his throat to give it some moisture. He felt like he was going to die, by the pace his heart was beating.
"Babe, you've got this," Dae encourages and holds onto the sides of his face massaging his neck. Jeno nods his head, suddenly feeling selfish. Here Dae was, giving him some air and encouragement, even though she's the one who walked out on her family and was also seeing them for the first time after years.
"You too," He holds onto her hands on his neck and smiles lightly.
Yezi watches from afar, seeing how strangely, adorable they both looked. Her sister, who she never thought could fall in love with someone who had no money, is suddenly looking up into the eyes of her lover with so much care. And the lover, Jeno, who Yezi once thought was just a sick criminal, looks like a little cute boy under the embrace of his mother. Even though she doesn't say it, and refuses to acknowledge it, deep down, they look happy and peaceful together.
Walking over to Yezi with their hands together, Yezi leads them in the house and Jeno has to keep himself from ogling at the house for too long. After passing a long corridor and walking into the entrance of the living room, Jeno's heart stops beating.
In the living room, Chenle and Chungdae stand side by side, with little Areum clinging to her grandmother's hand. When entering the living room, the first face that lights up instantly is Chungdae when seeing her gracious step-daughter who she loved the most. Her teeth are bright and so inviting that Jeno feels at peace when seeing a friendly face. Chenle on the other hand looks composed and modest- but his face morphs into shock when both Jeno and Dae get on their knees and bow down completely with their heads touching the floor.
He and Chungdae share eyes of surprise. Chenle tries not to laugh maintaining a sincere face again, just as Chungdae speaks up. "Oh, much appreciated," She says as Jeno stands and helps Dae up on her feet. The loving eyes from Chungdae and the warm smile, makes Dae want to cry by how familiar her mother's face was.
"Hi mum," Her own smile brightens up her face as she bows again, this time her head lowers slightly. Her mother is dressed in an elegant traditional styled hambok, and Dae's afraid to wrinkle or mess the dress, but when Chungdae steps forward with loving open arms and embraces Dae- Dae's can't help but wrap her arms tightly around her mother's frame "Mum," she lightly cries, laughing a little when her mother kisses her ear.
"My sweet," Breaking up the hug, Chungdae squeezes Dae's cheek and let's her go before looking to Jeno.
Jeno awaits for the smile to wither from her face, but is surprised when it's still there. "Good afternoon madam," Jeno bows down in a 90-degree angle, thinking that when he looks up her smile would've disappeared, however, when it's still on her face, he's completely stunned.
"Welcome," Chungdae bows her head as well patting his shoulder. "And you can call me, Mrs Chungdae, you're welcome here. It's good to finally see the both of you,"
Chungdae steps back and turns to Chenle. Dae and Jeno fix their positions to look at Chenle. Dae is hesitant, when looking into her dad's eyes, but regardless still tries to do so. Her smile is shaking and all she feels like doing is crying. The last time she saw her dad, a lot of harsh words were exchanged- she was not even in the right state of mind for most of those times. Her smile is rocky and her eyes blur up with tears that she can't even look at her father anymore, she hangs her head in shame. Jeno from the side, feels his heart wear down when watching her silently break down in front of her dad. He breaths in and gently slides his fingers in her hand before squeezing it, for comfort and strength.
He then turns to Chenle, who still has his somber eyes on his daughter. "Good afternoon sir. Thank you for your invitation. For allowing your daughter to bring me here." Jeno bows down in a 90-degree angle humbling himself completely. Dae follows as well, bowing down with her eyes closed to maintain herself. Standing up straight again, Dae clears her throat.
"Hi dad. Thank you..." She softly speaks and her voice shakes again not being able to meet his eyes and thus bows down again- and Jeno willingly follows. "Thank you for your invitation. And I'm so sorry for everything I've done. Please can you forgive me, for all the words I’ve said, the stress I caused you and mum, the hate I spread in the house, please forgive me dad. I truly apologize for all that I’ve done, and I beg you to forgive. I said a lot of things to hurt you, but I didn’t mean any of them and I’m sorry for how I left. I’m sorry dad."
"My daughter," Chenle meekly raises his hand laying it on his daughter's head. Feeling his hand on her head, she squeezes her eyes shut to not break down again. Chenle's face is holding back so much on emotions, but it slips out when he feels the head of his daughter. "I forgive you, please don't cry. You know I don't like it when I see you cry,"
"Thank you, for this invitation," Dae stands up straight again with a smile on her face and her eyes still watery. Chenle's hand retreats but he’s taken aback by the wave of emotions that pass over him when Dae engulfs him in a hug so dear and deep. Chenle can’t resist and sets his arms over her shoulders in protection like he had always done. Finally, his daughter has returned.
Smiling when feeling her dad’s arms around, she nuzzle’s her head a little more on his chest, before she separates from him and bows her head down again. Chenle’s face is glowing with pride and excitement and he turns to Jeno who also stands straight. Chenle bows his head quietly acknowledging Jeno.
"My name is Zhong Chenle, you can call me Mr Zhong." Chenle addresses Jeno in a fluid tone, with no harshness or strictness, simple and calm. "What's your name?"
Jeno bows lightly. "Thank you Mr Zhong. My name is Lee Jeno,"
The name makes Chenle tense but he nods his head. If his daughter chose him, then he’d need to get down to the bottom of it and see why. It was up to Chenle to see how serious they were. "It's a pleasure to meet you Lee Jeno," Chenle greets and turns his head to the side, down to the little girl who just looked up with an erratic smile. "This little bean right here is Zhong Areum,"
Chenle introduces them to Yezi's daughter, making Yezi smile. Ever since Areum was born, Chenle refused for the baby to have his surname. So seeing the love traverse from him to her daughter, a flow of content joy washes over her.
"Hi mummy’s sister!" Areum chirpily greets, brightly before shyly leaning on her grandfather when Dae puffs her cheeks in delight. Chenle picks her up patting her back telling her to carry on. She waves her hand to both Jeno and Dae who wave back with big smiles.
"Areum, this is Dae, your aunty," Chenle speaks in a soft cradling voice making Chungdae laugh. "And this is Mr Lee, your aunty friend,"
Jeno doesn’t feel any jab from Chenle referring to him as a friend, but Dae does. She was hoping that her dad wouldn’t diminish Jeno into that position.
"Areum what do we do when we greet people?" Chungdae questions calmly watching Areum.
"Gwanpa, can you put me down, so I can greet?" Areum asks cutely with big eyes. Chenle sets her down patting her head.
"Of course, my little bean,"
Areum places both her hands over her stomach and dress and bows down. "Hello Miss Dae and Mr..." she quickly looks up and looks to her grandfather.
"Mr Jeno," He assists patting her head again as she returns to bowing.
"Hello Mrs Dae and Mr Jeno." She finishes her bow and does a little curtsey with her dress gaining an applaud from Chungdae, Yezi and Dae- automatically making Jeno clap his hands. In his head all he can think of is how she looks like Dae…but as a little girl. “I have a funny joke, what does a clock do when it's hungry?”
“What?” Dae smiles.
“It goes back four seconds?” Jeno asks but gets surprised when Areum begins laughing and giggling suggesting that it’s correct. That makes the family clap again, making Jeno shake his head with a little smile on his face. Chenle coo's in a baby voice.
"Aigoo, my little bean sprout is all grown up," He picks her up again with a dashing smile, before turning to Jeno and Dae. "Make yourselves comfortable, you can follow me to the dining room,"
Jeno turns to Dae squeezing her hand tighter. His nerves were still high, but upon the warm welcome and the tension sliding down because of the little baby girl, Jeno feels slightly relaxed. "This is it,"
Dae nods her head, following behind Chungdae and Yezi, who follow behind Chenle who is still carrying Areum and whispering into her grandfather's ears. "Gwanpa, is that really really mummy's sister?"
Chenle nods his head with a smile. "Yes, she’s your mummy's sister,”
"Gwanpa, if I’m a queen would that make her a princess? I wanna make her a queen because she looks nice- beautiful,” Areum corrects herself before charmingly complimenting Dae. “Why does she look beautiful?”
"Because she's my daughter," Chenle cackles a little, he never got tired of the endless questions that left her mouth or how much of a chatterbox she was. It's moments like these, where he hopes that his little granddaughter, didn't inherit any bad or foul manners from the savage rapist. She was such a passionate young and vibrant soul that Chenle easily found intriguing and alluring.
“Gwanpa, Mr Jeno looks like a prince, I think he likes her a lot and wants to become a King,”
"You should ask him if he wants to be a king," he pats her nose still answering to her questions, meanwhile thinking of all the questions he wanted to ask Jeno.
"Do you think daddy will go hard on Dae and him?" Yezi asks calmly to her mother.
"Let's hope not," Chungdae replies. "I feel like he might want to embarrass him a bit. He kept talking about that nonstop all through the night, but he did also mention how he wants to reunite with Dae again,"
Yezi groans. "Fingers crossed, it doesn't get awkward."
Meanwhile Jeno holds onto Dae's hand like he's on life support. Dae wraps her fingers tightly against his as well. "No matter how intense it gets, just answer honestly. My dad will try everything he can to belittle you, but remember what I said back in the house, don't let him break your spirit, he hasn't walked a mile in your shoes, so don't mind if he doesn't understand." She says, words that always made Jeno feel more drawn to her.
The dining room is large, and has an extremely large round circular table, with various of decorations and platters of food on a rotating stand. Areum waves her hand to her mum as one of the servants walks away with her. Jeno and Dae, wait for the family members to take a seat before finding themselves next to each other and sitting. Chenle acknowledges that and is impressed.
Dae smiles secretly, knowing that her dad loved order and discipline. And if Jeno could at least show that he was capable and worthy to dine with him, then Chenle would ease up a bit on him. He simply wanted to see how well-mannered the boy was, since he was groomed by misfortune, Chenle wanted to test out how well he could be for his daughter.
Yezi is seated on the right of her father, while Chungdae is seated on the left of her husband and Jeno and Dae sit next to each other- being in Chenle's direct eyes vision. "Shall we eat?" Chenle asks and they all take in their utensils ready to feast.
As the rounding table makes the rounds and the servants walk around the table adding little side dishes here and there, Jeno feels much more overwhelmed then starved. From the many utensils on the table, to the little plates the servants put with tiny looking leaves, Jeno places his hand underneath the table lightly placing it over Dae's leg.
She turns her head to him, seeing him panic. Calmly she leans in and begins explaining that he can eat whatever, which plates he has to put the food in and which plates he dumbs the bones and what's not. Her whispered words of encouragement don't go unnoticed by anyone at the table, especially Chenle who picks up his chopsticks and watches the pair while he eats. Much to his distaste Jeno snickers and Dae does so as well- he ignores it and clears his throat gaining their attention.
"Dae," Chenle starts.
Chungdae nervously turns to Chenle. His first target. Dae looks up and adjusts her sitting position before smiling. "Yes, dad,"
For some reason, Chenle's heart feels a little touched when hearing her say the word dad. It's been a while, a really long while. “It’s wonderful seeing you in strong health. For how long have you been clean?”
Dae clears her throat with a little smile. “2 years now.”
“Rehab or self-rehabilitation?”
Dae answers honestly. “Self-rehabilitation. Actually, the night I left home and went clubbing, I was hit by a car,” This causes all of them to look at her in worry. “I, uh. I broke some ribs and nearly lost my life because I barely had enough blood in my body. A blood transfusion was done, and when I woke up… I felt as though, a second chance of life has been given to me,”
Chenle’s heart aches hearing the story. “Why didn’t you come home after that?”
Dae briefly looks to Jeno, who offers a somber smile before rubbing her thigh. “I didn’t want to live my life like before. I felt trapped, and it wasn’t because of you,” Dae immediately clears up, holding onto Jeno’s hand. “I just, wanted to live alone for a bit.”
“A bit turned into years,” Chungdae speaks sadly but a smile regains on her face. “May I ask you this, this blood transfusion you did that saved your life, was it the young man’s blood?”
Dae nods her head with a smile. “He’s the one who helped me that night. Paid the bills, gave me blood, offered me a place to stay, he was always by my side,”
The warm tone settles upon Chungdae seeing her child look so bright and happy. “Well thank you Mr Lee for that. Otherwise, we wouldn’t have been able to see our beautiful girl.” Chungdae smiles. “Pleae enjoy the food,”
Once again, everyone begins eating in a calm atmosphere. Jeno has never eaten so slow, as well as tiny bites in his whole life, however seeing everyone eat in a slow and paced manner, Jeno adjusts himself. This doesn’t go unnoticed by Dae as she snickers here and there covering it with a little cough.
Subsiding his friendly character, Chenle has his eyes on Dae who constantly looks to Jeno. "Dae,”
“Yes?” She instantly looks away from Jeno and to her dad feeling caught. She gulps, just as Chenle prepares himself.
“I’ve tried deviating from my culture merely because I didn’t want my daughters to be bounded by tradition. I’ve given you a good life, good education and have paved a way for a future that you can maintain. The family business of architecture as well as our lifestyle, you left it all for your own self satisfying pleasure because you felt ‘trapped’. I’m assuming you have a lot to showcase for your disobedience. Have you made a name for yourself by walking over our tradition?" The question alone brings Jeno into a front line of defense. Even though Chenle was her dad, Jeno wouldn't allow her dad to walk over how hard she had worked to get to where she was now. She worked extremely hard and Jeno was ready to defend. Unconsciously. However, Chenle unaware of the set eyes on him, continues on. "How's that going? What do you do?"
Dae feels heavy by the sharp arrow that was aimed for her heart by his words. “First of all, I am grateful for all the opportunities I was able to get while being here. Second of all, I never intended to disobey you dad. But I needed to do it for a clear mindset in what I wanted to do, in where my heart felt good. And lastly, I'm a Junior Editor."
"Editor? Junior?" Chenle poses in disbelief. "That's in the writing field. Meaning you don't get paid much, as for junior, you probably don't do much. What do you write about?"
Dae breaths in and nods her head looking up to her father. "I write articles on and for the youths of today and the struggles they face."
"That's like freelancing work." Chenle sighs out trying not to make it a big deal, but he's disappointed. His daughter. His first daughter scrapping by. He glances at Jeno. "And you Mr Lee. What do you do?" Chenle slurps on the fresh vegetable in a bowl, looking already bored.
"Photography."
"Wow, another freelancer." Chenle sounds dishonored much more then disappointed, and he continues to eat his dish of food. Yezi savagely tries to hold in her laugh replacing it with a cough and quickly looking down when Chungdae shoots her a glare. The couple of Dae and Jeno briefly glance to each other in hesitancy, but regardless they eat.
Just as Chenle is about to say something else, Dae along with everybody else get surprised by Jeno's voice. "You know Mr Zhong, not to be rude, and I say this with 'respect'-" only Dae catches on to his mocking tone, and gets worried for him. "Since you brought up your culture and tradition, according to the Zhong's line of history as well as your own private company's humble beginnings, small beginnings was were you started. So pardon me if this comes out rude, but truly I don't think you've got any right to be pissed off, you also left your family to please your own self satisfying pleasure-"
Dae's eyes widen and she places her hand over his thigh. "Jeno-"
But nonetheless Jeno still continues to speak. "To be pissed off at her career would mean neglecting her small beginnings. I don’t know much about your family, but what I do know is that your family’s legacy only grew into millions of because of you. What if Dae’s small beginnings allow her to reach your peak-"
"Comparing my family's legacy and personal company with Dae's quote on quote small beginnings sounds radically obscure. Do you even know who I am? My small beginnings lasted within a year, and I've been making millions ever since. Dae's small beginnings are small beginnings on a scale of failure," Chenle starts while setting his dish down, taking the next set of food while Chungdae grumpily adds some soup for him. She didn't like how his words sounded too harsh. Meanwhile Yezi has wide eyes glancing with a shocked face at her dad and then Jeno. “So tell me Mr Lee-”
Jeno breaths out, feeling Dae sinking in shame when she looks at her food and quietly eats. "You're talking about me as if I'm not here," She mumbles. “And my small beginnings aren’t on a scale of failure, you don’t know how hard I work-”
"Your lover is the one who started with the comparisons and small beginnings. You want to be mad at the truth? Suck it up and continue to embark on your sma-"
"Honey." Chungdae warns looking at him.
Chenle sighs. He nods his head whilst eating as if he's not having the conversation. "Do you believe that she'll make it big in her field Mr Lee?"
"I believe in her."
"I didn't ask if you believe in her. Because I also believe in her. And I much more believe she has a brighter career elsewhere, but what's important now is do you believe that she'll make it big in her field?"
"Yes-"
"Dae who never ever pays attention to the news, the same girl who barely gives an ear to those less 'fortunate' then her? My daughter? That same daughter who would never be interested in anything if it wasn't about her? The same daughter who got involved in hardcore drugs- that same girl caring for people seems unusual. A journalist? On top of that a youth journalist? Youth? Smart mouths with foul brains, those youth? Those same youth? Maybe she gives you a speck of patience, but I know my daughter. Does she really love what she does or is it just some passing want from feeling trapped? Does she have tolerance and patience for others? For you? My daughter wants to do journalism? That doesn't make sense to me," Chenle states out nonchalantly yet sternly. "I've seen her writing. And although phenomenal, she'd need a spark of light in her to empathize with youths. Regardless of what you say, I know my daughter much more then you. I know she's merciful, but in the field of journalism, it'll be used against her. With her temper, she'll easily get frustrated and allow for anyone to walk over her. I can't see, or even bare my daughter within a career where she constantly has to fight,"
Dae's stunned by his words. Never ever had he ever told her why he refused for her to be a journalist, he simply had a strong distaste towards any career that had a lack of funds. "Dream crusher much dad?" Dae chuckles sadly to cover up the pain.
"Dae, are those even dreams? To waste yourself away behind a screen writing for others? Dae. I'm…” Chenle refrains from using the words disappointed, but he’s already hinting at it. “I’m trying to understand. Why- why, why a journalist?"
Dae looks up to her dad in disbelief. "Because I’m a spoilt rich girl who’s gone through an experience that fucking changed my life forever. I left a house of riches to dwell in a place where it’s dark with no light. Why a journalist? Because in that dark dwelling place, I fucking saw a light and I wanted to fucking empathize-"
"Language Dae." Chungdae softly peeps being uncomfortable by all the slurs.
Dae stops and takes a deep breath. "I'm doing this because it gives my heart peace knowing that no one, especially a youth has to feel like they’re alone and that their futures are jokes. I’m saying the truth of my life to reach people in dark-"
"Truth?" Chenle scoffs. "In the world we live in? Truth and people don't go together, because this world loves to be blinded. It’s why the rich are rich and the poor are poor, those who have eyes don’t help those who can’t see. Today a journalist would rather break an untrue story and say an apology later, they could break thousands of hearts, but one apology and everyone forgets. You're telling me you haven't seen those cases?"
"I've noticed that lately."
"You can spend years putting together a story to help someone see the light, only for some toddler with a social media account to just tweet it out, with low grammatical words. As for professional objectivity, try maintaining that while competing against teens dancing at the news, or on TikTok and what not, and in the rare case let's say you do get a real story, you will be backlashed because all you did was your job. The truth hurts and rubs on people the wrong way."
"So what are you saying dad?" She asks seriously trying not to be discouraged. Jeno, places his hand on Dae's thigh, running his hand up and down as a way to calm her down.
"I'm saying." Chenle stops setting up his bowl to look at his daughter. "As my daughter, it's really my desire that if there is anything else you see yourself doing, do that instead." Chenle ends the discussion without much say, getting his next bowl. "You’re smart and if you want people to see the light, use your intelligence to-”
"Mr Zhong, I really do apologize if I'm being rude," Jeno interrupts not being able to be calm anymore, especially after noticing Dae's sagged shoulders. Truly Mr Zhong was a businessman with ideals and head on strong facts. However, that could never beat how much effort and change that Dae has put in. Which is why, Jeno with resilient courage speaks up for Dae. "I hate to break it to you, but the Dae that left your house years ago, isn't the Dae sitting in front of you. Her intelligence has changed and she’s adapted to street smarts too. I agree that Journalism isn't possibly the career that you invasion your daughter in, but she's similar to you in many ways. You started out with a master’s degree in Research, you left Research to join your family’s legacies of Doctors, before leaving it all together and had to dump it all including your family to finding out what you really wanted to do. But I digress, how can you put her down when I read that you even went as low as being a brick man and laying bricks for a living? You eventually decided you wanted a career in construction. Humble beginnings should never be neglected. If you didn't disqualify yourself, why discourage her, your own daughter? And if you're talking about money, then let me I’ll say it now, she makes money more than me-"
"Are you giving me street psychology now?"
Jeno breaths in deeply smirking a little when seeing a challenging look in her father’s eyes. "Street psychology makes you learn lessons the hard and painful way. Being rock bottom teaches you of success that being rich can’t. I've been with her ever since she left your home, so I know what I'm talking about when I say she's had a fall from your grace. But look at her now," Jeno turns to her, throwing a little smile and lightly patting her cheek (causing Dae to smile a little) before turning to Chenle, who even stopped eating to firmly be attentive to Jeno after publicly displaying such a manner. "I too, worry about the giant dumpster fire of twiddling toddler's, but I also don't care about that and I know she doesn't care about that. She writes for a living you know, she's always been writing and has tweaked her personalities here and there to adapt to the life that she's wanted. And if she can write a piece that has touched an orphaned boy's heart and stopped him from spiraling down into a dark path of drugs, then I know and have the belief that she's broken through the noise you’re projecting. I don't know why she isn't saying it now, but she always says, she wants to make a difference in all the ways that she can. That’s a fucking huge commitment if you ask me. And I'm not trying to take your place or anything like that, but even if she does fails in her projects, I’m here for you no matter how many times. You haven't been there for her, so you don't have that right to criticize or be disappointed in her achievements so far. I’m saying all this respectfully. I don't mean to sound rude or come of impolite, but the truth is the truth, and it can rub you the wrong way, so swallow it like a bitter pill."
“Well said, you’re the one living with her.”
Dae has a warm look in her eyes when looking to Jeno, her boyfriend, her choice, her messed up but one of the many right choices. How passionate he's been in defending her, whether it was to someone he never knew or someone she knew, and not allowing anyone, not even her dad, to walk over her. He's made it clear, time and time and time again, how he won't let anybody ever talk down on her or disrespect her. And its kind of alarming for Dae that Jeno just said all that while being ‘respectful’.
It's tensely silent with Chenle paying mind to his food instead, Chungdae and Yezi holding in their breaths, Dae smiling while eating on her meet- and Jeno returning back to his senses and freaking out. "Fuck." He mumbles, but instantly feels Dae's hand on his thigh. He turns his head seeing her reassuring smile. She mouths out a sweet thank you. It's enough to subside his irrational thoughts and focus on how calm she is.
Chungdae smiles when noticing the adoring look in Dae's eyes. Chungdae faces Chenle and picks up another bowl of rice before placing it before him. He looks to her, still eating his own bowl of meat and soup, and as if being summoned by the rice Chungdae lightly grins, and nudges her head towards Jeno and Dae. Chenle takes a look for himself, his eyes catching a sight too traumatic and so heartbreaking.
Dae looking at Jeno, the same way she used to look at him as a child. As a father, his child will always be his child. No matter how irrational, no matter how unclear, no matter how confusing she might be, even when she's falling in love with a foe, she's still his daughter. His first daughter. His first love whom he loves with all his heart. He doesn't know what's the name of the emotion that covers his whole heart when seeing Jeno, an unknown peasant briefly gazing at his precious daughter with stars in his eyes. And his daughter equally having eyes of fierce approval. He doesn’t like it, but he can’t put down how real it looks. He looks at Chungdae the same way too. And that scares Chenle because he doesn’t want her to marry such a guy.
She just came back home. His heart doesn't want to see her go just yet, especially not to a man who he still isn't too sure about. "Mr Lee."
Jeno peeks up and sits up. "Yes sir- I mean Mr Zhong,"
Chenle breathes out. "Are you treating this such as an interview?"
"Interview?"
"Seeing as though you've read my biography and probably Wikipedia, you seem to think that you have an understanding of my background," Chenle drinks a glass of water, firmly gazing into Jeno's stunned eyes. "Is that true?"
Jeno clears his throat, fumbling with his lips before nodding his head. "To be honest sir, I've known your work. The apartment my family and I lived in when we were little was actually designed by you."
"You could afford it?"
"Dad." Dae's shoulder slump.
Surprisingly Jeno chuckles. "It's okay babe- Dae, I mean." He quickly corrects himself, before turning back to Chenle. "I couldn't afford it, but my old man could....sort of. We lived with another family, so although tightly cramped, we all fit in together. To get back to you, being in that complex for a very short period of my childhood was sincerely the most mind blowing experience of my life."
"How so?" Chenle tilts his head. "And which complex was it? Situated where?"
"It's was called Clearview Water Hill. Situated in Goum NC."
Chenle nods his head. "I recall, it was amongst my first private building going public for government uses. It was labeled to be for the rich."
"To be honest, I felt rich as a young boy. The walls, corridors, rooms, even the water was so different. Not only that, but my dad was a construction worker so we watched a lot Construction channels. I had seen you appear time to time on tv. So regarding to me researching about you, I didn't have to do much except read it from Dae's pieces. The things I know about you are actually words Dae had written in her article pieces. She spoke extremely highly of you, it even gave off an impression that being in your presence is surreal. And it is… if I’m being honest."
Chenle is astonished (just when his mind slowly began to wonder if his daughter wanted to replace him), as his quick mind reflex suddenly pauses. His eyes turn from a sharp stare, to being enlightened. "You wrote a biography about me?"
"You used dad for clout?" Yezi laughs a little.
"What's clout?" Chenle asks, causing Yezi and Dae to snicker.
"It's slang dad," Yezi giggles.
Dae runs her hand through her hair swinging it back. "Not necessarily a biography, but advice on how to solidly build a future, brick by brick. I paid almost all my references to you and how successful you've been in paving the way brick by brick for your future,"
Chenle's face remains unchanged, yet Chungdae is in awe because she knows that Chenle is catching butterflies. Yezi is the one to voice it out. "Dae I told you not to boost his ego,"
This snaps Chenle out and he begins laughing. A sound which jolts Jeno out from his crave for the meat. His reaction makes Yezi laugh inwardly.
"Before I feel too honored. I still have to read what you wrote," Chenle remarks. "Word count?"
"2,500."
"Blog?"
"No, it's an article."
Chenle nods his head, shuffling in his seat bringing out his phone. "Name of website?"
"NationsWide,"
"Hmm," Chenle nods his head in approval. He's silent when scrolling through his phone, going through the about page and finding out the ratings of the website. Although it has a 8.8 out of 10 rating due to faulty writers and time consuming management, it has a high rating when it comes to work pieces. "It's a big shot company."
Dae finds herself smiling gladly turning to Jeno who pats her head- forgetting one of the rules that Dae put in place to not make any unnecessary physical contact. But she's happy non the less. “What’s the title?”
“I’m bad with titles, by it’s called Future Bricks Are Better Then Past Bricks.”
“It’s too long girl,” Yezi comments.
“I told her that too,” Jeno remarks smiling ligtly.
“Hey, I like it sounds good,” Dae cutely puffs her cheeks tempting Jeno to kiss her cheek, but he refrains from doing so.
Chenle searches up the title and immediately is impressed when seeing 5 stars in gold next to her article. That's his girl. He nods his head, as a smile crawls up his lips. "5 stars Dae, good job."
Her heart feels good. If it took Chenle simply reading from her article, then it would’ve saved time from Jeno backing her up. It's always difficult to get a reaction or compliment from him, so getting an actual reaction makes her feel joyous. Especially for something that he complained about minutes ago. In his silence of taking interest and suddenly reading his daughter's piece, Chungdae takes it as a cue to speak to Dae and Jeno.
"Are you two living together?" She smiles, causing a smile to grow on Jeno's lips as well.
"Yes,"
"Oh," Chungdae is a very traditional woman and always counters culture over modern society. So hearing that Dae and Jeno live together without having gotten married is a bit...it makes her feel uncomfortable for them. "Living together is such a huge commitment. It requires both of you to have an entanglement that you'll never leave each other,"
Jeno already being informed by Dae that her mother had the tendencies of being culturally educated, clears his throat in answering. "If it sets your heart as ease, we sleep in different rooms...to prevent us going too fast,"
"In going too fast, I assume you're talking about children?"
"Mum?" Yezi chokes on her food. "Please not that conversation, people are eating."
Okay," Chungdae nods her head letting out a little laugh with a hint of ease settling over. "That does set my heart at ease. I'm sorry if this makes you feel uncomfortable but, may I inquire about your financial status Jeno? You mentioned photographer, right?"
"Right," Jeno nods his head.
“Could you tell me more about it?”
"Uhm, mainly I work as an advertising photographer, so I range from models, to houses, to products even nature. So as a whole, I guess that’s stock photography. I have side jobs here and there as part time so yeah," he nervously peeks at Chenle wondering if he'd get pissed. However Chenle isn't even looking or paying attention to them, but instead continues to read, paying his whole mind to the article he's reading. He’s nearly done reading, but his ears also give an ear to hear the conversation.
"Hm." Chungdae nods her head. "Well, it's something. Who supports financially?"
"I pay house rent and Jeno buys our necessities," Dae mentions. But is unaware of Chenle's sharp gaze.
"Excuse me?" He suddenly perks up. "You're paying the rent?"
"Our apartment is under my name so-"
"Because of his felony charges?" Chenle perkily asks to which Dae shakes her head.
"Felony exceeds one year, so no. And he doesn't have a felony charge. It's because of his prison record of 10 months."
"And you're proud to say that?" Chenle mumbles doubtfully while shaking his head, continuing to read. Whilst Chungdae continues to ask Jeno, some more basic questions such as if he's religious, has siblings, has parents, if they know about Dae and his relationship- so on. Some questions Dae had never heard the answers to, as Jeno would completely ignore her or change the subject. Questions pertaining to his family. She never knew his dad died...no wonder he always made dark jokes about not having any.
"Meaning you're much closer with your mother right?" Chungdae questions with a sympathetic smile.
Jeno throughout all the questions that he doesn't want to answer he kept his head down and occasionally looked up from his food- even going on to eating more just to avoid the question or staying silent to ignore. But not knowing Chungdae, he isn't expecting her to nag on and on, and not wanting to make Dae's mother upset or cause Chenle to pin him out again he answers. "She kicked me and my brother out when we were teens."
"Now we’re getting somewhere." Yezi mumbles while folding her arms. "Who's your brother again? Was it-"
"Mark." Jeno stuffs his mouth again. Dae knowing that not only is he (slowly) getting enraged by the endless questions, she also knows how much he hates talking about his family.
So being alert she clears her throat. "Okay, mum I think you've got a pretty broad idea of who he is now,"
Chungdae smiles meekly. "You know Dae, when I first met your dad-"
Much to Yezi's disappointment, who hated this story with a passion (due to the fact that in her mind Chungdae was still considered a side woman) gets up going to look for her baby. "I'm going to check on Areum."
Meanwhile Chenle sets his phone down when he's done reading. Impressed with what he’s read, he approves by giving it a rating.
"As I was saying. When I first met him, he was already self-made, financially stable and had a big job. Everything was already there. However, he didn't tell me any of that. And I, didn't have a clue on who he was at the time. Meaning to say, I didn't have a pretty broad idea of who he was until I found out the basics as: what his beliefs were, what his priorities were, what his family thought of him, what he thought of himself deeply and what flaws made him human. Only when I found out all those things, was I... almost ready to be with him." A masked smile comes on her face. The type of smile that's ready to offend but not wanting to seem blunt. "Jeno, you seem like a fine young man right now. However, I'm worried that it might not be who you are when you're outside of our house. I don't know how you treat my daughter-"
"Mum-"
"Let your mother talk." Chenle blinks once turning back to Chungdae. This was supposed to be a grilling session for him to get to know Jeno. Yet with the way Dae gazes upon Jeno's face, worries Chenle. His heart isn't used to seeing this gob struck look of so called love on her face. Especially since he just met her. It's been years, so he doesn't want to cause tension that'll make her leave again.
It's better Chungdae does it and Dae listens, rather then him doing it and never seeing Dae again.
Up till now, and with the way that Jeno spoke on Dae's behalf on something that she was 'passionate' about, Chenle just doesn't like the idea of his daughter already being tethered to a man.
She still has a long life ahead of her, however being in a relationship limits her life and choices- oh gosh especially on her financial status. He wants his daughter to enjoy life to the fullest. And Jeno can't give her all that.
All that he can give her is words wrapped in love. And he doesn't want that for his daughter. His daughters deserved much more than cheap love and words.
"She has a point. The least you can do, is listen." Chenle says again a bit softly when looking into Dae's eyes. Dae inwardly groans, yet when turning her gaze to Chungdae she sighs with an upset face.
"Even though I didn't give birth to her, I know who she is. And I'm not trying to poke holes in your bubble but I am saying that you're from two different worlds. Two completely separate worlds. You won't clash on a lot of things. And right now, as happy and giddy as this relationship has been, remaining faithful together or even growing together won't be that easy. Jeno, judging from your lack of family touch, and your upbringing from your brother, I'm not too comfortable with my daughter being down below with you. I do see your passion and will to have a better life, but it might not be enough. Right now, I can most likely hope for your future to be filled with growth. Because I don't think it'll be easy. Based on your foundation, of how you both met, I'm still a bit... hesitant in accepting you. I just don't want this to end in foulness."
The silence lingers in the air with both couples, Chenle and Chungdae gazing at both Jeno and Dae. Jeno sets his empty bowl down having being full and listening to all the advice. Dae places her hand on his knee and he sighs. "If I'm completely honest Mrs Zhong, you're right."
Dae peeks her eyes to Jeno, hoping that what he’d say would contradict his statement.
"I do feel out of place at times when I'm with her. I feel that she deserves much better than me. Much much better than me. When driving here I even said that she left a mansion to cramp up with me in a little apartment. Look, I can't understand this, but I really really like your daughter and think that... she can do much better than me." Jeno nods his head agreeing. "But every time I think about her, or me, or, of us being together, I think of how much we've been through. It's true we met in uncanny circumstances but... The fact that she made the biggest sacrifice to stay with me, even though I gave her countless of reasons to leave, she still wanted to be with me, and that gives me the chills. Because she left your world, her world to be...in my world. And I can see where your concerns are, believe me when I say we've had this talk one too many times, but we always come to the same conclusion." His hand securely holds onto hers on top of his knee. "Only time will tell, if really this will work out, but I believe that when I stopped comparing her life before and her life now, it's made my head clear. And when she stopped seeing me as just that guy who broke into her house, we gathered a mutual understanding."
"What conclusions have you come to?" Chenle asks softly, his eyes on Dae yet he asks Jeno, because Dae's eyes are still on him.
Jeno clears his throat. "The conclusion that we're both humanly real and not perfect. And we can't be perfect, but if we keep trying to understand and love each other than yeah. I never knew how to manage my account and all that shi- stuff, but Dae's been really adamant on teaching me. I never knew how to cook. I only lived off by water and bread, but she knows and has taught me so many great dishes, especially the Chinese ones. I never mediated or did yoga before, but with her, every morning we're both up and yoga-ering as a way to restore our mental health. I've never been good at getting attention or knowing how to market, but Dae's a real professional at that and has helped me market my work. Not only to say she's an important aspect of my life, but she came from recovering from overdosing, not that I helped much but I made sure she worked out, ate healthy, spoke her thoughts, gave her a change of scenery, made sure she always saw the sun… I mean, if I also have to list the bad stuff, I can just say, she doesn't know how to keep her stuff organized. Always cluttered, everywhere and plain right messy- respectfully messy-"
"That's true." Chungdae chortles.
"But she's been improving, she now puts the toothpaste back in its case, instead of living it open and on the toilet seat. Not only that, but she used to stress so much so that she never slept, always up at night and working, but along the days I used to show her that she's got enough time to drop he shoulders, breathe, to unclench her jaw, to meet people who will understand her instead of being a kiss ass, to rest without feeling guilty, enough time to try as well as fail, to change paths, to close her eyes, to sleep and rest, to do so many things that she wants to do, her life is long. Another thing, she never knew how to be active, she's ambitious, but lacks the effort to actually move to get things done, she's always online. Yes she does yoga, but she always sat down behind her screen or desk slouching and writing, but now I can genuinely say she's keeping fit by constantly jogging, she exercises as well, and can throw a punch for self-defense, not to say I taught her how to be violent, but for a lady in her form I'm pretty proud that she can throw a man twice her size over her shoulder."
"I did it to him," Dae marvels cheerfully.
"I simply taught her what I know and she taught me what she knows. We're both taking the good in our lives and presenting it to each other trying to make our lives better and throwing the bad away. We read the newspapers together, watch the news, read psychology books and talk to each other and learn about each other. Because I love her and just want her to be happy without any restraints. We are both new to this love, so we're learning with each other not only how to receive love, but also how to give love. You know, she expresses herself through writing, she always writes, she struggles in speaking up for herself or formulating the right words for the right moment, thus it's why she used to be condescending and using her privileges to walk over people. But now, I don't know why she's not doing it now, but she gradually speaks and pushes herself to be genuine and understanding. Mrs Zhong, I understand that you don't trust me with your daughter, but I'm telling you honestly that I'm careful and gentle with her. I don't want to hurt her again, or even allow myself to lose her to a successful man who's got everything. I want to be everything for her. I'm working my ass off in getting to where I want to be, and making sure that she's happy and securely in her field. I don't have it now but I know that I'll get it. I'm trying my hardest, I'm putting my all and investing literally my whole life into this. I don't know what you want, but your daughter is here and she chose me, I can promise you that I won't put your family to shame."
Mr Zhong's ears are perked at Jeno's whole plea. He can see the ambition and drive in his eyes.
"Can I be honest with you right now." Chenle starts being equally respectful as Jeno has been. "I disliked you because you were poor and seemed unable. But. After reading what I've read, I can say that the Dae sitting before me, isn't the Dae with qualities that the world would reject like before. I'm still not for this relationship. But if I can at least have my daughter willingly help others, as well as herself, it gives you, Mr Lee, a mark in my books. It shows me how much you're invested in her. And another thing, if you, Dae, can't be pushed away from following your dreams, I think you'd be an excellent journalist."
"Thanks Dad," Dae smiles looking with admiration at her dad, causing Chenle to return the genuine smile.
"Keep writing pieces about me though," Chenle grins.
"Don't boost his ego," Yezi chuckles covering her face.
"Are you still hungry Jeno? Don't be shy if you want another round," Chungdae speaks up when seeing Jeno look at all the empty dishes. "There's plenty casseroles in the cuisine."
"Oh, no it's okay." Jeno smiles shyly. "Thank you Mr Zhong, and Mrs Zhong for the food. It was delicious,"
"I'm surprised you complimented Dae's cooking." Chungdae laughs before turning back and calling one of the maids names to come and remove the food. "Dae fights a lot when it comes to spices, especially with chili,"
"Well mother," Dae has a smug face. "Jeno here doesn't mind the spice or chili. He likes it hot,"
Jeno teasingly mumbles for only Dae to hear. "We're still talking about the food right?"
She playfully hits his thigh before turning to her mum. "I know what he likes to eat,"
"Honestly if you ask me, I still find it weird how you're with him." Yezi comments when the laughter dies down. Dae's jaw clinches but she eats on her rice (that she asked one of the maid to leave for her) remainign silent. But that's not the case for Yezi who glances up at her sister. "It's strange because I know you, and I know that this is not the type of guy you'd quote on quote fall in love with."
"Yezi." Chungdae calls out calmly, with intentions of warning her.
Chenle nods his head setting down his chopsticks when he's done swallowing a lump of meat giving his plate away to the maids. "No, Yezi's right. It's strange to see this, no disrespect to you Mr Lee, but it seems like Stockholm syndrome."
"That's so unfair. We just finished that discussion." Dae mumbles glaring at her sister and dad. "It's not-"
"I know," Chenle nods his head with a gentle smile. "With the way he's spoken about you, my ideas of him shifted. Perhaps it's not a forced love. I just need to get used to the idea of seeing you with him. That's all,"
"You can't force him down our throats, we still have to get to know him," Yezi comments.
"So Jeno, how about I get to know you more. If it's possible, drop me an email on your availability and I'll set up a date for you to come to my company."
Jeno's eyes widen. "Really?"
"I wanna see how good you are at your work of photography. There's some houses that will be completed within a week from now and I need some photographs. Will you be interested?"
Jeno gulps nodding his head. "Yes sir- I mean Mr Zhong."
"Good. Now if we all may, there's a resting area waiting for us,"
S1: EP14-16
22:48
"I can't believe you lied to my mum that we sleep in different rooms," Dae chuckles when entering the comforts of their shared room turning around to eye Jeno who unbuttons his shirt.
Jeno has a smug look on his face before tilting his head. "I mean, it's sorta true. I told you to take the other room, but somehow you’re always here even though your stuff is there,”
"That’s because it’s lonely sleeping alone.” Dae smiles when kissing his lips. “But still, I don’t know if she bought that.”
“If she did, then it’s best if we keep it under the wraps of how much of a freak you are in my room, in bed.” Jeno lightly chuckles, watching Dae walk backwards while running her hands up her body giving him teasing eyes.
“Regardless, I'm glad it went well.” She notes as she removes her shoes and gathers some wet wipes to clean off her makeup. “Gosh I'm so happy it went well. Seeing my dad and mum and Yezi and Areum was such a serene moment that I’ll never forget.”
Jeno removes both his blazer and buttoned down shirt turning to Dae who’s removing her makeup. “They were welcoming, I’m glad you invited me to experience this experience with you. Seeing you with your family only brought peace to my soul. At least you’re reunited with your family again, your mum, dad, sister…and even that little child. Although, I won’t lie, I’m surprised that your sister…kept that child,” Jeno tries to say without saying it. “It’s just odd,”
“I know,” Dae finishes cleaning the makeup off her face and applying some cream before she stretches her arms moving to the night stand lamp turning it on. “But you know what, she’s still my baby sister’s baby and I’m a proud aunt who gets babysitting rights.” Dae smiles brightly. “I just can't express it in words. I'm so happy right now." Dae smiles and bites her lip innocently. "Hey. Can you help me undo my dress?" Dae moves to the bed sitting down a little bit too exotically but Jeno still makes his way towards her.
Holding onto her calf, he kisses on her knee smiling before trapping her in between his body as he gets on the bed. “You’re so happy you’re getting turned on, I think this will be a problem,” Bending his head down, he softly smudges plentiful kisses along the side of her neck, licking and biting on her soft skin. He groans when Dae's hand secretly finds its way down his covered member and palms him soothingly.
"You forgot to tell my dad how good you make me feel,"
"Is that so?" Jeno rhetorically asks leaving envelope kisses on her collarbone whilst undoing the back of her dress. "Should've told him how well you suck me off,"
Dae giggles when her dress becomes loose, allowing her freedom to remove her arms and then her turtle neck- only resting in a corset and bra. Her lips crash onto his as he mouths his way down her neck undoing the strings of her corset. Having his warm fingers on her skin arouses her body to beg for him. She feels his big hands going behind her back unclipping her bra.
"Is this okay?"
"Mmh," She whispers. “Just do it,”
He continues to mouth his way up her body, her warmth on his tongue when he kisses her again. He strokes her heavy tits. Just as her lips find his again, the taste lingering of the wine present making her suck more on his tongue as he unbuttons his pants and lowers them together with his boxers already revealing his hard on. “I’m happy it all went well, because it means that they’ve given me permission to take you all the time,”
In one swift move he picks her up placing her on his shaft, as they both stare into each other’s eyes strings of moans leave their lips. Upon giving her time to adjust to his member, with her eyes fixed on his own lustful eyes give him the go that she’s ready, and he pounds himself hard once into her core earning him a blissful moan. He comes out slow before, going in hard again and then coming out slow. It becomes a cycle of himself going in and out until he’s sure that she’s okay. Within a second after ensuring, his body presses into her own skin loving the bounce of her breast. His eyes never leave hers, just as his slow passionate thrust becomes heavy and more impactful. His hips bucking into her, rampaging inside of her, her wetness invites and envelopes him with every coming in. Her eyes shut, with her hands on his shoulders, allowing him to do all the heavy lifting. She feels as though she might fly off him with every thrust he engraved into her.
She’s breathlessly moaning out at the top of her lungs, her head thrown back, just as his arms grip onto her waist, humping and grunting every time. She’s moaning out his name, calling out to him eagerly and passionately only making him grow harder inside of her. “Jen- fuck Jeno don’t stop, ah don’t stop~” He’s panting, holding her tight while his stamina takes over him and he holds her into him, allowing her movements and his to be fluid, going up and down, moving together.
She was his first and every time he’d get at it with her, he always felt the same as the first time. Special. He loved being inside her, how she made him feel. Under her skin and inside his head, he can’t help but press her into him hugging her tight as he pounds into her, his eyes on solely on her. Even though the struggle to keep her eyes open, his eyes are on her loving her every expression. She was so beautiful that he didn’t even know what to do.
When they both cum into each other, she’s left shaking on his member from the pleasure and that makes Jeno laugh. “I love when your legs do that, was it good?”
“Mhm,” She moans and slowly rides him circling her hips and bouncing lightly on him again. It goes on for another round, until they're both panting on the bed fully naked with steamy smiles. Jeno groans and curses out when Dae disappears underneath the blanket with a giggling laugh. “Fuck, are you not tired?” Jeno pants, feeling her mouth wrap around his shaft. “You don’t have to do it-”
Aside from having intercourse, the one thing Jeno didn’t ask for was blow jobs. Not only did it remind him of what his brother did to her, but he was afraid that her mentality consumed the behavior from the trauma she dealt with when Mark made her suck him off. Continuing to suck and blow, Dae doesn’t stop bobbing her head and taking him whole. For her, it allowed her to have control over the situation, rather than thinking that she had no power of her own. Jeno's muscles tense with pleasure before his legs are shaking again and she swallows his release laughing out in delight. Aside from them getting together, another thing that solidified them was how she broke his v-card and that for every time that they’d do it, he always felt attached to her and allowed her all the power she wanted with him.
"I'm going to shower," Dae gets off the bed being breathless, skimpily jogging seductively to the bathroom before peeking at Jeno who's eyes latch with adoration, she speaks up. "You should join me,"
"I'm coming," he smiles tiredly. Getting up from the bed stretching his arms, he picks up his own towel walking towards the bathroom however stops when hearing a faint knock on the door. He checks the time, frowning when it's late into the night.
He walks quietly to the door wrapping his waist with the towel. His eyes searching through the peephole. His eyes widen when noticing a familiar figure lighting up a cigarette.
Jeno ducks from the door when the figurine sends his fist flying to the door knocking on it. "Hello?"
Mark?
The person knocks for a while on, still smoking his cigarette. Jeno still ducked is confused and gets startled by Dae walking into the living room with a grin. "They you are,"
"Shh," Jeno mumbles with a panicked voice.
Dae's brows furrow. "Who's there?"
"Uh, I'm looking for someone,"
Dae suddenly hears the voice outside. She was asking Jeno, but hearing the answer come from outside she's perplexed. Looking back to Jeno who's chest goes up and down, she moves closer carefully. It seems he's hiding from someone. "Who're you looking for?"
"Does Lee Jeno, Lee Jeno live here?"
"Uhm.." Jeno sharply shakes his head in panic and Dae catches on. "I'm sorry but it's past midnight, and Lee Jeno doesn't live here,"
"Are you sure about that? Hey, please can you open the door. I'm a relative of his."
"I said Lee Jeno doesn't live here. Can you please leave before I call the police."
It's silent on the other hand before the man speaks again. "Fine, I'll come back in the morning. Let him know." Dae's about to speak in confusion but the person speaks again. "Tell him Mark came by. His brother. Alright. I'm going."
"Brother?" Dae quietly whispers and her eyes enlarge. Feeling exposed as though being ripped of her robe, Dae securely grips on her robe trembling back. "Jeno..." She pants out. "Was that, M-Mark?"
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"I went to the address you gave me. Some woman was there, said he didn't live there." Mark yawns laying back on the ground next to Donghyuck who's looking up to the stars. "And what're you doing here bro?"
Laying down on the green freshly trimmed grass Donghyuck groans and opens his eyes. "I'm not your bro man. You shot me and my brother."
"You're still at that? Let the past be the past. Now that we’re both out, we should be looking out for each other," Mark chortles.
Donghyuck shakes his head. “I never got a proper apology from you,”
Mark fidgets around trying to find a good position. "I'm sorry for shooting at you and your bro. I keep saying that I thought that maybe it was the end for us. You weren't moving and we needed to go. At least shooting at you would permit them to focus on you while I escaped."
Donghyuck turns to Mark with frisky eyes. "You fucking say that with confidence."
"I'm sorry man." Mark apologizes lowly having a smirk on his face. "Should've had your back."
"Whatever." Donghyuck mumbles and sighs out. "Anyway. I saw that address in Officer Park’s visitation book. It literally said Jeno's residence, so I assumed it's where Jeno lives."
"The apartment looks too fire for Jeno. I don’t even think he lives there.” Mark scoffs. “Then again, it wouldn’t be so bad crashing with him.”
"Your brother seems to be in good terms with the police, he occasionally speak to his Parole Officer, Officer Na. So, I don’t wanna crash there." Donghyuck shrugs his shoulders not interested in talking about Jeno. "D'you find a job yet?"
"None. I just came out last week and am not willing to go back, but my patience is wearing thin on doing things the quote on quote right way." Mark sighs. "It's why I'm out here sleeping with you in a park like a homeless kid."
"I’m actually homeless dude." Donghyuck snickers lightly.
"Nah, your mum can take you back any time. You're just choosing not to go. Stubborn."
Donghyuck scoffs. “The day I stepped into prison was the day my family and loved ones began their ‘prison’ time as well. My bad decisions caused me to be separated from my family for years. Life for my family still went on and they had to learn how to navigate through the ups and downs without me. The harsh reality of losing my freedom was that I could not truly help my loved ones in times of need compared to as if I were present. It was a bitter pill to swallow knowing that I had also sealed their fate by my own hands. When I was there with them, I felt so out of place. I don't know how many years have passed, but her and Renjun are like an oil machine. They're so tight together and it makes me feel honestly like a fuck up son and brother. A fucking loser who only goes over when he’s hungry. I..Just left." Donghyuck finds himself honestly opening up. "Life would be better if I wasn't around them. And besides, I see her at work..."
After coming out of prison, he honestly tried to get back in his mum's good books, but it seemed really pressuring. Especially with Renjun ignoring him and pretending he doesn't exist. Donghyuck could feel the tension in the air whenever he was around them and he hated that. Even though he didn't want anything to do with Mark ever again, they surprisingly found each other again. Mark came out of prison by probation and was constantly kept on a leash. So obviously when he found Donghyuck under a large oak tree in a secluded park, he knew that his friend had been staying out of trouble, and joining him wouldn’t be so bad.
“But come one man, don’t you miss having a bed?” Mark asks. “We could crash at Jeno’s place until we get some shit together,”
“You do that. He’s your brother.” Donghyuck mutters. “And judging from the fact that he hasn’t contacted you should tell you that he may not be looking forward to reuniting with you. You said you heard a chick?”
“Yeah,” Mark mumbles. “She was like, Lee Jeno doesn’t live here. But I knew she was lying,”
Donghyuck chuckles lightly. “Well if that’s the case, and he’s got a girlfriend or something, he won’t let you back in easily,”
Mark groans. “I’m his fucking brother,”
“That’s what I said about Renjun, and he hates my guts,”
“Nah that boarder jumper-”
“He’s a citizen now,”
“Wow,” Mark snickers. “Either way, he was never your brother to begin with,”
For some reason that hurts Donghyuck, because he slowly started considering Renjun as a brother and everything he did was always for his mother as well as Renjun’s wellbeing. And despite being in okay terms with his mum, he also wanted to get back on Renjun’s good books. “Well if you wanna get back with your brother, I suggest getting him to sympathize over you because if he’s anything like Renjun, he won’t let you in his house,”
“That’s some brother,” Mark shakes his head. “But it’s cool, I’ll stay with you,”
Mark doesn't want to say it, but it's evident that they only have each other. While Mark didn't want to lose the friend he had, Donghyuck wanted to stay away as far as possible from him. “I thought maybe getting myself in an accident, like breaking my arm or starving myself, would have them take me in easily. But no, they’ve got stone cold hurts. But the little I know of Jeno, if you hurt yourself he could take you in,” Donghyuck plants the seed into Mark’s head. Now he’s just hoping Mark will take the bait.
It's why before dawn, before the sun comes out of its blanket, Donghyuck awakes early and gets ready for his day by simply wearing his leather jacket. His eyes go over to Mark before getting up and heading to his day job.
His mum was kind enough to buy him 2 extra pairs of trousers as well as 2 clean shirts, and Donghyuck kept them in the school’s janitor closet. He knew it wasn’t professional, but it’s not like the school would know- since the school also offered him janitor uniform which was a grey shirt with the school’s logo and white pants. So after cleaning his face in the male washroom, he heads into the tiny janitor’s closet to change up into his work uniform. The choice in color not only made him look approachable, but it singled him out as the cleaner.
Most of the time Donghyuck didn’t have to do much cleaning since the young kindergarten students would always clean up their home room classes early in the morning. Donghyuck only had to handle the staffs’ resting room, bathrooms, hall ways and occasionally cleaning outside the jungle gym. The kindergarten school was a moderately rich school with a big yard and no other buildings around. It had students from the age of 5 to 7, and only 7 staff members (including his mum), 1 principle and 2 janitors- in total 10 workers. The school had 6 working days, so Donghyuck worked Thursday’s to Saturday. With only a number of staffs team, the school wasn’t that big, but it was decently strong in the education department of training young students. One thing Donghyuck liked about it, was that it was a private school, meaning the young students were taught much more than the average kindergartener.
Donghyuck had students politely greet him, had some helping him with picking up trash and throwing it in the bin, and even (on some rare days) shared with him some of their merit sweets. But none of the students were like the little female student known by the name of Areum.
While she was like the rest of the students, politely greeting him, helping him after school when all her friends had gone and even giving him some of her merit sweets- ever since that day that they spoke on the bench, she was attentive to him.
“Hi Mr Sunshine,” She greets in a tiny voice that echoed loudly with a big bright smile.
Donghyuck turns his head down to the little kid, just as his mother who’s walking down the hallway towards him notices the little girl. “Hey kid,” Donghyuck greets noticing she has a basket and opens it up revealing some creamy cupcakes. She digs her hand inside and picks up one with a glittery label on a toothpick that said, Mr Sunshine. Donghyuck’s brows furrow with a little smile. “What’s this?”
“Today is my birthday,” She smiles brightly.
Donghyuck takes the glittery cupcake bending his knees and crouching down to be almost at eye level with the little girl. “You’re a leap year baby? How old are you now?”
“I’m now 6 years old,”
Donghyuck tries not to laugh. “Technically, you’re 1 years old because this is the first leap year in years, but I’m not gonna judge.” She smiles. “Well happy birthday kid. Did you make for your whole class?”
She nods her head.
“You’re a very kind little girl,” Donghyuck lightly pats her head smiling before he stands up. “Thank you for making me a cupcake. I don’t have a present for you now, but I can tell you a joke,”
“Okay,” She gets excited.
“Why did the clown go to the doctor?”
“Why?” Even before Donghyuck can finish, she already starts giggling.
“He was feeling funny,” Donghyuck puts emphasis on the funny as he moves his hands in a wave manner- and of course she loses her mind and topples over while laughing. Donghyuck pats her head cautiously. “Why don’t you head on to class. The bell’s about to ring, hurry,”
“Okay, bye Mr Sunshine,” She cools down from her laugh.
“See ya,” Donghyuck gets back up and drags the rest of the cleaning supplies back into the janitor’s closet. While opening up the door and goes inside, his mother (who stopped walking to watch the interaction) begins walking to the janitor closet only for her to freeze in her steps when noticing an all too familiar face…faces.
“Areum, don’t go too quick,” The lady in a navy nurse uniform turns into the corridor and finally sees the little girl. “Hey, wait up,” She walks with one large brown bag as well as a covered cake in the other hand just as a little girl, the same little girl Donghyuck was talking to, comes over and walks alongside her.
“Sorry mummy,” She smiles. “The bell’s going to ring,”
“Don’t worry about the bell, you’re going to mess up the cupcakes and doughnuts if you run too quick,” A man, standing next to them in a police uniform smiles down at the little Areum.
“Okay, I was just excited,” She bounces up and down. “I wanna give everyone a cake already,”
“Then let’s not keep you waiting,” The man has his hands filled with several plastic bags but still managing to hold onto the little girl’s hand. Donghyuck’s mother blinks twice and has to turn away while the pair and little girl walks past her.
His mother is in shock after recognizing that the police officer was Na Jaemin and the nurse looked exactly the same as the girl that had her house broken into by her son and friends, her name was Yezi. After they pass she quickly goes into the janitor’s room but stops midway when Donghyuck pulls the door open and dusts his hands while eating and chewing on the cupcake, being surprised to see his mum.
“Mum?”
“H-hey,” She greets with a tight smile, but then grabs his arm and quickly dashes outside of the building holding him tight.
“What’s wrong? What happened?” Donghyuck asks as he’s being dragged out the building. “What did I do?”
“Donghyuck, who’s that little girl that keeps talking to you?” She asks when they’re outside taking in one big breath.
Donghyuck tries to think for a second when trying to get this mum’s question. “I don’t know, Areum, why? Is it because of the cupcake? It’s her birthday and she gave me one,”
“That’s not what I’m asking, I’m asking whether you know who this girl, as in her parents?” His mother tries to calmly ask out.
Donghyuck furrows his brows and shakes his head while shrugging his shoulders. “I don’t know her parents. Why? Did she get hurt?”
Donghyuck’s mother can only stare at him with wide eyes feeling her heart beat fast. Her son just got out of prison and had been doing fairly well for some weeks now. She can’t allow anything bad to happen to him. “Look,” She breathes in nervously. “This little girl, just like all the other girls and boys have parents and families who are stacked with money and power. I just want you to be careful whenever you talk or engage with them. I doubt any of them would approve that an ex prisoner is a janitor at this school, they would lose their minds. I know these people. Which is why, I’m saying this. I don’t want any problems so I’m asking you, please Donghyuck, do not- and I repeat, do not find yourself in a problematic situation involving these kids. Okay?”
Donghyuck nods head when seeing how serious his mum looks. “I won’t. I promise,”
“Especially that little girl who’s always around you.”
Donghyuck nods his head again.
“In fact, I want you to stay as far away from her.” She pats his arm slightly and heads back into the school allowing her hand to massage her neck that became slightly stiff. “I hope he listens,”
Donghyuck doesn’t even have to think of the situation, especially regarding that little girl. If his mum was warning him, it only meant that this girl had parents who would cause havoc in his new path. So continuing to eat his cupcake he walks to the corner of the building and connects the hose pipe to begin watering the grass.
Yezi has to do a double take when seeing the man. Of course she can’t see his face but his backside has her in wonder. Especially since he’s eating a cupcake.
“Are you coming?” She snaps out of her thoughts when hearing Jaemin.
“Yes I am,” She smiles when buckling her seatbelt. “I hope Areum has fun today,”
“Me too,” Jaemin notes and starts up his car. “Hey, I wanted to ask you something,”
“Sure, as long as you’re still taking me to work,”
Jaemin begins driving turning his gaze lightly to Yezi before looking back to the road. “I was taking Areum to school the other day, and noticed something weird,”
“What? She picks her nose? Tells bad puns? Laughs and talks alone? I was worried too, but dad said it’s a natural thing for kids so it’s okay.”
Jaemin’s ghost smile fades when recalling what Areum was doing. “She was...” Jaemin sighs deeply as he himself didn’t even know how to say it. The sight was unusual and made him question what was going on in her head. Yezi takes note of his chilling tone, and watches him. “She’s an odd child, but I worry about her. I know it feels like I’ve pushed the boundary between work and your family, but I really do worry about her,”
“I’m grateful that you’ve always been there for me and my family whenever we called. And ever since Areum was born you’ve almost become like family to me. So I appreciate you so much Mr Na,” Yezi acknowledges Jaemin by meekly smiling in his direction. He was 7 years older then her, but whenever looking at him she always got butterflies. Much to her family, Jaemin was just an officer, but to her- he was like her best friend. “So to have you worried about her, makes me kinda feel anxious. What’s wrong? What did she do?”
“It’s not what she did… more like where did she learn it from,” Jaemin licks his lips peeking at her. “How active are you with your boyfriend? Sexually speaking.”
The question makes her cheeks and neck glow in warmth. She even shifts in her seat trying to remain calm. “Uh, Jaehyun and I… don’t really…we haven’t gotten on that boat yet,”
That’s news to Jaemin’s ears. “Really?” Yezi nods her head. “You haven’t had any inter-”
“It’s kinda hard thinking about sex when I was raped as a child.” Yezi mutters. “Did Areum say something odd?”
“No, no,” Jaemin runs his hand through his hair. He tries to be respectful considering Yezi’s history. “I’m just asking. A-actually, tell me about him. Jaehyun.”
“Pardom?” Yezi has to blow air out of her mouth when finding the atmosphere warm and a little bit too much for her. “You hate when I talk about him,”
“That’s because he’s 9 years older than you,” Jaemin mutters covering up with a cough. “I mean, I don’t have anything against the guy other than he’s 30 and you’re 21. He’s a great guy, has a good looking face, egotistical personality-”
“Jaemin,” Yezi drags out a sigh with her smiley face. “He’s nice to me. But what does asking about him have to do with what Areum did? What did she do, tell me?” Jaemin’s nonchalant face doesn’t budge only making Yezi much more adamant. “Jaemin?”
“I’m just looking out for her,” Jaemin says. “I know you work over time, and your dad doesn’t get back until late and your mum started attending some afternoon yoga classes- but really is there no one else you can trust Areum with? Nanny even?”
“The last time I trusted a nanny, I found her hitting Areum as a form of discipline. I’m not going down the nanny line again. Plus the one’s we have at home only work for my dad and mum. They can watch Areum, but I don’t want them too. She’s my little girl and I don’t want them to pontificate her mind,”
“Come on Yezi, and Jaehyun?” Jaemin’s eyes widen. “He’s a 30-year-old man. Just because he’s got a lot of free time doesn’t-”
“I trust Jaehyun because he makes Areum happy, she doesn’t get nervous or scared around him. And because he’s older he takes his responsibilities seriously. It’s not his responsibility, but he’s passionate about her and that makes me feel some form of safety.”
“The best I can do is drop her every morning to school while you go off to work early in the mornings. If I could look after her, after school, would you allow me too?”
Yezi has an unknown sad frown on her face, but subtly nods. “She doesn’t open up much to people and with you she’s afraid because you have a gun and deal with ‘bad people’, but if it’s what you want to do, I can consider it. But you already have so much on your plate,”
“Trust me Yezi, Jaehyun’s great. But there’s something off… maybe it’s not even Jaehyun. Maybe it’s her friends at school,” Jaemin begins second doubting himself.
“Jaemin what did she do, that has you so worked up?” Yezi pleads this time feeling worried.
Jaemin sighs. “It’s not a big deal, just…” Jaemin’s eyes brighten. “What about your sister? You said she’s clean again, can’t you ask her-”
“I’m not gonna ask her until you tell me what happened with Areum?”
“Fine.” He rolls his eyes, before the nerves kick in again. How would he tell her that he caught her daughter bouncing and even dry humping herself on the backseat of his car? She would be in a frenzy state. But then again, Jaemin could be over thinking it and Areum wasn’t doing anything scandalous and he could’ve saw wrong….no he couldn’t have saw wrong for 18 weeks now. “She humps her seat every morning I take her to school.” Jaemin reveals. “And she does it excessively, like she’s trying to pleasure herself. I, I could be reading too much into it but I can’t help but wonder why she does that. I’ve tried asking her but she stops and then says nothing.”
“So, you’re suspecting Jaehyun of-”
“No, I’m not. I just.” Jaemin stops himself before finding the words. “She’s a little girl and takes things in easily. In a way, if he’s the one watching her afterschool, don’t you think she’s learning things from him? Plus I could be wrong about him, and it’s not him but instead it’s the students at her school. Maybe some male student or even the female students, I don’t know Yezi. If I’m reading too much into it, then there’s nothing wrong and it’s nothing to worry about, but if it’s something true then I think you should check on the people around her because she’s learning some bad things for her age. She just turned 6 today,”
Yezi is in silence as well as astonishment from everything Jaemin says. “Humping her seat how?”
Jaemin doesn’t say anything but then his body starts awkwardly moving back and forth before he starts bouncing lightly on his seat. The scene is erotic and has Yezi’s eyes widening. “Like that,” Jaemin says before stopping and resting back on his seat.
Yezi sharply intakes some air and looks away. Her cheeks are flushed and the tempo of her heart changes. However, for the rest of the ride, she says nothing until Jaemin reaches the hospital in which she interns in. “Have a good day,” Jaemin says, a small smile sipping onto his lips just as his eyes look guilty for causing her tension so early in the morning.
Yezi stiffly smiles and unlocks her door stepping out. She shuts the door and heads to his boot to bring out her work bad- afterwards she goes back to the window and knocks on it. “I’ll call Dae and see if she’s available. Uh, do you mind picking me up afterwards?”
“Time?”
“Half past six,”
“Sure,” He nods his head but he can’t help when asking. “Will Jaehyun be with Areum?”
She stiffly nods her head and tilts her head to the side looking anxious. “I’ll talk to him during my lunch break. Thanks for telling me.”
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For the next coming of days, Yezi is highly cautious of Areum. She tries spotting or even catching Areum when ‘humping’, but just like Jaehyun said perhaps Areum wanted to pee on those days that Jaemin picked her up. Jaehyun assured Yezi that Areum only acts like that when she really wants to use the bathroom. Her suspicion died down when Jaehyun assured her that Areum is a good girl and doesn’t know things like that- and if she did, then he would put it down immediately. And even when Yezi tried investigating by talking with teachers at her school, and with her dad and mum- they were confused by the brass topic. ‘How could she know such?’ They’d ask. Even when Yezi would hump the floor and ask Areum what was happening- Areum didn’t seem to know what her mother was talking about or even doing. So while Jaemin never brought it up again, Yezi was able to relax and hoping that indeed Jaemin might’ve seen Areum in her pressed state and in need to use the toilet.
However, for Donghyuck who constantly watches Areum rub herself on the bench when everyone’s gone gets bothered by it. Like his mother said, he tries to stay away from Areum as much as he can. But he can’t help it, when day by day it really looks scandalous. This little girl was being sexually abused and mind fucked by her uncle.
Donghyuck doesn’t know the depths of it, of how much the little girl knows, but it surely gets on his nerve every time he’d see the smirking uncle touch the girl. Areum, even though Donghyuck didn’t know her, was a sweet little girl who loved making friends with everybody. She was a little class clown who brought smiles to everyone’s faces. Donghyuck remembers when on one assembly, while the students were watching their entertainment of the week by some dancing clowns, Areum got up as well and began dancing- challenging the clowns, bringing smiles and laughter to everyone’s faces. Donghyuck even acknowledges how smart she is, from always getting golden sticker stars on her forhead to the amount of merit sweets she’d get- this tiny little girl was oblivious to the fact that she was being used by her uncle, all in the name of playing.
And so when approaching her after school past 3pm on a Thursday, he notices how tired she looks when dragging her pelvis slowly on the bench.
“Hey kid,” He pipes up with a tiny smile, causing her little drained face to meekly smile.
“Hi Mr Sunshine.” She tries smiling but she looks so tired.
Donghyuck takes a seat next to her on the bench taking a look at her. “No joke today?”
She stops humping hanging her head down.
In her lack of response, Donghyuck clears his throat speaking again. “Waiting for your uncle?”
She looks up and nods her head. Donghyuck feels strange watching her look so drained of energy before her gaze goes back to the ground. It’s silent for a little while before he speaks up again.
“Do you still play that game with your uncle?” The question itself makes Donghyuck itch the wrong way, but when Areum tenses up his face thickens with anxiety. “What’s wrong?”
“I don’t like playing fuck with Uncle Jung anymore.” She murmurs out. “But he likes playing it.”
Donghyuck’s jaws lock before he tries asking another question. “Why don’t you tell your mum? Or dad?”
“Mummy likes him too much,” She answers. “And I’m scared she’ll be angry with me,”
Donghyuck finds himself feeling bad for the little girl. She must not have a father, and her mother might be a strict rich parent or something along the lines- Donghyuck thinks to himself. “I think you should tell mummy. If you tell her what uncle does to you, she’ll tell uncle to stop.”
She shakes her head timidly and looks nervous. “Uncle Jung will punish me. He told me to never ever tell mummy or else fuck will become harder,”
Donghyuck’s brows furrow in distaste. That fucker, he thinks. “How about this,” Donghyuck breathes in. “I can tell a teacher and then your teacher will tell your mum-”
“Nooo,” She shakes her head looking petrified. “Uncle Jung doesn’t like bad girls. If I’m a bad girl, he’ll punish me.”
Aside from her outburst in stress, Donghyuck can tell that something has changed in her. Whereas the first few days she looked content of the ‘game’, she now seems more reluctant. “Do you like playing that game?” He asks lowly.
Areum shakes her head before getting up from her seat when a black vehicle stops in front of them. Donghyuck is deep in his thoughts until a car comes. He bites his lip to hold back his anger, but he gets up and walks with Areum until her uncle is out the car.
“Hey puppy,” He greets with the pet name. Donghyuck’s ears are sharp when hearing the ‘happiness’ sip out of Areum. Poor little girl is so afraid that she even fakes her happiness. “She wasn’t a bother was she?”
Donghyuck’s head turns to the man and he shakes his head. “She never is. Hey uh, sir.”
“Yes?” Jaehyun peers back at the man after shutting the door when Areum gets in the backseat.
Donghyuck can’t find the words to say when looking at the little girl in the backseat. He only feels anger boiling in him. She’s trapped in the car with an abuser. “Whatever game you’re playing with her you should stop.”
Jaehyun’s head tilts to the side and he blinks. “Excuse me?”
“You heard me.” Donghyuck turns in his step and walks back to the school.
Little does Donghyuck know when Jaehyun gets back in the car he turns back to Areum who has her head hanging low. “Areum were you a naughty girl today at school?”
Areum looks up and shakes her head.
“Are you lying to me?”
She shakes her head again.
“Does that guy know about the game?”
Areum hesitates a little and her eyes look down. Jaehyun starts his car being angered. He doesn’t say anything except plays his jam as he drives back to his house whereby he’d stay with Areum until 18h30 and take her back home. Upon getting to his house, he helps Areum undress into the spare clothes her mother left over at his house, and begins assisting her with her homework. When they’re done, he allows her to watch tv while he works on his laptop. Initially, they’d have ‘play time’, but Jaehyun is heated with anger that he denies her request of play time and goes into his room. Not long after, Areum knocks on the door and pushes it open.
“I’m sorry Uncle Jung.” Areum apologizes when standing by his door. “I won’t tell anyone again.”
Hearing that, Jaehyun exhales lowly. Recently he started doing things a little bit different with her, perhaps it was too much for her. “What did you tell him? And don’t lie to me.”
She keeps her head down, being scared to look up. “I don’t know.” She admits. “That I play fuck with you and that you touch me here.” She points to her lower part.
(You can skip this part and go straight into part 2- it's overly gruesome and i felt disgusted writing this part. I'm not projecting that Jaehyun would ever do this in real life.)
PLAY: Season 2: Part 2
Jaehyun rolls on his chair and faces her. It took him only a few conversations for him to convince Yezi that he wasn’t doing anything inappropriate with her daughter. And truly speaking he wasn’t…he only liked to show Areum how her body worked and what she should do to relieve herself. He liked to touch…and see how she liked it. Aside from that, he didn’t think that he did anything wrong. She would soon forget about it as she grew up, but for now he was aroused at how the little girl’s body worked. Despite being so young, she reacted pleasantly to all the games they’d play together. He didn’t want to stop, and he surely enjoyed himself while playing with her- if anyone else found out about this, they’d have him imprisoned. “Do you want to see me go to prison?”
Her eyes widen and she shakes her head. “No Uncle Jung.”
“Do you want mummy to stop us playing together?”
She shakes her head.
“Then next time, don’t tell anyone. If you don’t like the games anymore, tell me and I’ll stop. But never ever tell anyone again, or I’ll be forced to punish you, and you don’t want to be punished right. Now come to me like a puppy if you want me to be good to you,” Jaehyun gives her a little grin before patting his thigh. She hesitantly gets on all fours and begins crawling to him. Upon getting to his feet she looks up to him sticking her tongue out looking just like a little puppy.
Jaehyun coo’s lightly and carries her over his lap before rounding his chair back to the laptop. “Did you try and relieve yourself today?”
She shakes her head. “No,”
“Bad girls don’t lie my puppy. I’ll ask one more time, did you relieve yourself today?” As Areum sits on his lap, he continues on typing out on his laptop of some orders that needed to be made from his car dealership store.
“I was trying, but I couldn’t.” She shyly admits. “Can I play on the horsey Uncle Jung?”
“I’m a little busy right now, but I’ll let you ride the horsey and then we can play okay?”
She eagerly nods her head, before Jaehyun man spreads his legs allowing Areum to scout over his crotch, she sits on his sleeping manhood and begins grinding on him slowly. Jaehyun grunts lowly and shifts his hips slightly up to give her better access. His member begins waking up when her tiny hips begins to grind faster. Areum closes her eyes, as her fingertips grip tighter onto his thighs as she feels the horsery waking up. She parts her legs a little to see the horsey bump. “Look Uncle Jung, he’s waking up.”
“He likes it,” Jaehyun mutters, now scampering to finish the package details and deals so that he can attend to Areum.
Meanwhile Areum’s body vibrates when it seems like she’s finally hit that spot that was always in need. She let’s out a cute tiny moan, just as Jaehyun hits send and shuts his laptop. “Good Girl.” He encourages when her humping weakens. “Do you wanna play the game now?”
She looks up and eagerly nods her head. Jaehyun picks her up and carries her out his study and into his room. He places her gently on the bed while he moves under the bed to pull out a box of his pleasing toys. He get’s out a pink dildo as well as pink vibrator. Areum’s eyes are already glistening with eagerness and she adjusts herself on the bed.
Jaehyun sets the toys on the bed and kneels down on the floor, pulling Areum to the edge on the bed. She smiles when he gets his hands underneath her skirt and over the strap of her panty. He slowly starts pulling them down while Areum as expected lays on the bed and bucks her hips up to help Jaehyun remove her panty quick. He lifts up her skirt, allowing him the full view and access of her tiny clean and hairless vagina. He stretches her legs seeing her it was slightly wet. He gets the lubricant and squirts out the lube.
Areum shivers by the cold slimy liquid pouring on her lower half. Even though Uncle Jung said that this liquid would help in easing his fingers inside, Areum thought it wasn’t working, since she’s been feeling so much pain. “Uncle Jung?”
Jaehyun snaps his head up being snapped out of the hypnotizing view. “Yes my puppy,”
“Please can you not put your finger inside me again. It hurts,” She mummers.
Jaehyun’s hands move up her small little legs before his thumbs play with her folds by opening and closing them. She was so beautiful, Jaehyun couldn’t wait until she became a teen, she’d have the most striking and juiciest of pussy’s. His thumbs play over her pussy lips mixing and spreading the lube everywhere. His face comes close and he looks up to her who has her eyes on the ceiling while biting her skirt that’s over her mouth. “Because you were a bad girl, I wonder what I should do to you,” Jaehyun mutters as his lips hover over her pussy. “Since you don’t want me to put my fingers… Should I eat you out?”
She disliked having him eat her, but it was better than his fingers. So when she feels warmth over her area she tenses up and squeezes her eyes shut. Jaehyun’s tongue laps over her pussy and he twirls his tongue over her little bud. He’s not soft at all when sucking in her bud and continues to rub his tongue over her whole core. She whimpers while hearing Jaehyun slurping down on her like some kind of meal. Jaehyun grips underneath her butt as he positions her closer to his devouring tongue. He makes her wrap her legs around his neck as he continues to lap at her quickly. The strawberry lubricant mixing with the slightly sweet taste of her own nectar. Jaehyun moans out, when her tiny whimpers begin to pick up and her own core pushes more into his mouth.
“Uncle Jung,” She gasps while getting closer to her edge, but like always Jaehyun stops and she’s forced to let out a whine by the unfinished arousal. Jaehyun smirks and unwraps her legs from his, his lips being wet and coated with lube and her own nectar.
“Because you were a bad girl, I won’t let you enjoy this,” Jaehyun smirks and picks up the vibrator. He switches it on watching it shiver as it begins vibrating. Jaehyun places the triangular shaped vibrating vibrator over the little whole. He carefully sticks it in- causing Areum to squeal delightfully as she bucks her hips into the vibration of the vibrator.
He places a finger over it and glides over her bud enjoying her exasperated faded stare. Since he couldn’t get it from her mother, then Areum was the next best option. Her expressions where fluid with passion. She held nothing in. She looked especially arousing that it just pushed Jaehyun over the edge a lot of the time.
Picking up the soft dildo (which he bought just for her) while his other hand holds onto the vibrator. While she gets closer and closer to her edge Jaehyun prepares himself for when he has to remove it. With one hand he places the lube over the tip of the dildo. And just as her legs shake he stops the vibration. She whimpers like a little puppy and Jaehyun smiles. “Uncle Jung,” She whines but he shakes his head with dark lustful eyes.
“If you didn’t tell, then maybe I was going to go soft on you, but because you told you’ll be punished.” Jaehyun states and directs the soft male dildo penis over her little whole. “Do you wanna ride the horsey?”
Despite being zooted out she still nods her head lazily and shuts her eyes again, preparing herself. Jaehyun prepares to place the dildo’s tip insider her like usual, but something comes over him when seeing the young girl being vulnerable with her eyes closed.
“Don’t open your eyes okay my little puppy,” At that she shuts her eyes tighter, just as he shifts himself and unbuckles his pants. Very slowly he slips his pants and boxers down before standing up and adjusting his cock that’s already rock hard. Using one hand, he places his palm over her eyes covering them from seeing anything, before groaning and grunting when setting his tip over the warm squishy hole. “Ah,” He lowly grunts. “Just the tip,” He whispers to himself, when together with the lube over her core, he gently pushes himself into her warmth.
Unlike the skinny dildo penis, his tip is slightly bigger and thicker causing her to gasp in pain. She tries to get up, but Jaehyun keeps her down, when he continues to slowly stretch up her walls and entering just the tip. He watches as his pink tip struggles to squeeze into the little girl’s hole, but he doesn’t stop as he continues on.
Areum at this point is grunting and squeezes her eyes shut her toes curling and the newfound pain. “Uncle Jung,” She barely manages to get the words out her mouth into a loud audible phrase as the pain consumes her.
What was supposed to be the tip, happened to be half of his dick slowly being riled in and out of her. Jaehyun can tell that she’s passed out because her body is non-responsive to the pain, but he’s not worried because it’s not the first time she’s passed out. And so without having to worry of whether she sees or not he removes his hands from her eyes and continues thrusting in a slow pace until her tiny whole that wraps around him invites him in to slide easily. He only places his dick by half inside of her watching the bulge form on her belly with each and every new thrust.
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PLAY: Season 2: Part 2
(i'm truly sorry for that whole scenery.)
[Taglist: @rizykim | @sexygrass | @jenjaemjam | @lvmarfc | @haechanistfriends | @markleefuckme ]
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haddonfieldwhore · 11 months
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late nights - nick jones
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nick jones (house of wax) x fem!reader
word count: 845
warnings: a few uses of ma’am, lying to law enforcement, mention of a stolen car, mention of violence, nsfw hinted/themes? idk, langauge
@visceravalentines
a scraping sound outside your window nearly pulled you from your sleeping state, but i wasn’t quite enough to wake you. instead, your eyes snapped open to the feeling of a hand over your mouth, and you stared up and the man crouched above you in your bed, the cold breeze of the midnight air prickling against your skin through the open window.
“shh shh shhh it’s me,” nick hushed as he slowly removed his hand from your mouth. you sighed as he kissed you softly, rolling your eyes as your heart rate slowed back down to its normal speed.
“jesus, nick. you scared me,” you said, turning towards him as he laid down next to you in bed. “you know there’s this thing called the front door-“
“well where’s the fun it that?” he smiled mischievously, kissing you again, deeper this time, his teeth nibbling at your bottom lip. rolling on top of you, his hands landed on your hips, fingertips sliding underneath your top. “is this my shirt?” he asked, lips travelling up the column of your throat.
“what if i tell you it’s some other guys?”
“i’d tell you that you’re a bad liar.” he kissed your lips again, before a knock at the front door interrupted the two of you. “oh also- i’m not here.” you slapped his chest as he rolled off of you, letting you get up to answer the door. you hurried down the stairs and opened the door to be met by the beam from a flashlight in your eyes.
“ow- watch where you shine that thing,” you said looking away as the police officer on your doorstep lowered the light. you flipped the switch for the porch light, and let your eyes adjust.
“sorry ma’am. how are you tonight?” the officer who’s badge read “norris” asked.
“i was fine before someone started knocking on my door in the middle of the night. most people are asleep at this time you know?” you rubbed your eyes before wrapping your arms around yourself to try to keep warm.
“i’m sorry ma’am.we’re looking for a certain individual by the name of nick jones. have you seen or heard from him lately?” he asked, and you silently wondered what your boyfriend had done now to have the cops knocking on your door.
“no, i haven’t. is he… dangerous?” you asked, putting on a scared face; it usually worked to throw off suspicion, at least in your experience. this was not exactly the first time you had lied to the cops to protect nick, but the first time he had been hiding in your room when you’d done it.
“there’s nothing to worry about ma’am. just checking the with anyone who we think might have heard something, that’s all. we’ll protect you.” he said, his eyes trailing up your bare legs in your pyjama shorts.
“thank you officer. if i hear anything you’ll be the first to know,” you fake smiled, shutting the door with a sigh once he was down the driveway. just as you relaxed, nicks fingertips dug into your ribs and you nearly shrieked. his hand covered your mouth to stop any sound from coming out, and was quickly replaced with his own lips on yours. you kissed him back as he dragged you back up the stairs and to your bedroom.
“what do you think baby, am i dangerous?” he teased, his hips pressing against yours as he hovered over top of you in your bed.
“hmm very,” you hummed as you bit the skin under his jaw gently, soothing the area with your tongue after, causing nick to groan slightly. “what did you do this time idiot?”
“just stole a car for a few minutes, no biggie,” he laughed, and you hit him upside the head with your pillow.
“i’d you go to jail i’m not waiting around for you, jackass.”
“sure you’re not.”
“whatever. you owe me,”
“yes ma’am.”
“i swear to god if he called me ma’am one more time-“
“want me to kick his ass?” nick joked, but you knew he would’ve actually done it if you asked. instead you just rolled your eyes, poking his chest with your finger. nick kissed you once more, deeper this time, but slower, as if to show you how much he appreciated you in a way he couldn’t express with words.
“thank you. how ‘bout make it up to you?” he smirked, his thumbs hooking under the waistband of your shorts and beginning to pull them down as he lips ground yours again. you smiled into the kiss before he slid his tongue past your lips. his large hands dragged your shorts down your legs, and he trailed kisses from your hip bones down to your knees as he went.
“nick-“ your breath hitched as the cold air hit your exposed skin, his kisses sending tingles up your spine.
“relax- i’ll be gentle,” he smirked, pressing a kiss to your inner thigh as he stared up at you.
“and you said i was a bad liar.”
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syntia13treeman · 2 months
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Case files 06.01
We've got a new monster! I repeat, we've got a new monster! Also this call was made just 3 days before Sam heard it! The monster is roaming the streets as we speak!
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Ahem. Let us begin.
What I think happened in:
Case 06.01, the case of "Prickly Hugger – a cautionary tale for muggers" or
"I'm scary and pointy!"
We've gathered here today to talk about Mr. Needles.
Who is Mr. Needles? Mr. Needles is a local. He grew up here (somewhere in London), and he'd seen the neighbourhood go from 'nice' to 'dreadful' over the years. (He had a hand in that, though he won't say how). He used to feel lonely and hollow, but has found something to remedy that. Some kind of mark. Don't worry about it.
Mr. Needles does not look dangerous. On the contrary, he seems like an easy mark, a perfect victim (a perfect lure). This particular night, some knife-wielding ruffian fell for it and tried to mug him. Mr. Needles let the mugger get very close, before deploying needles (they come out from under his skin from thousands of tiny holes). (…does it hurt? Every time. Mr. Needles doesn't mind. He's experimented with BDSM before).
He happily glomped the mugger and made sure to position himself over muggers face (and his eyes). The needles broke off after digging into the mugger's flesh. (It's OK. They grow back).
When the mugger was already on the ground, moaning and bleeding, Mr. Needles decided to call emergency service. This was not his first hmugger, but his first emergency call - he's not very clear on how exactly they work, but he does know where the local contact centres are located.
After a little bit of back-and-forth with the dying mugger and the various operators, Mr. Needles ended the call without actually stating their location, so it will probably be some time before somebody stumbles upon a body full of needles, lying in a pool of blood.
Somewhere in Lambeth, a police operator is feeling rather unsettled and will be looking over his shoulder on his way home for at least few days. (And maybe he'll meet an unassuming little man fond of hugging).
Other important things to know about Mr. Needles: Mr. Needles is a very scary monster.
He can smell fear. He can smell fear even over the phone (which probably means it's not actually scent he's perceiving, but that's just a technical detail).
If his scare-factor is challenged, Mr. Needles becomes agitated and rattles his needles like an angry metal rattlesnake. It is not advisable to question his scariness. He WILL take offence and threaten to stalk you.
What we don't know about Mr. Needles:
Sewing needles or syringe needles? I've seen fanart depicting classic hand-sewing needles, but I don't think that works for the simple reason that the mugger is said to be bleeding to death rather quickly, while the needles are still in him. Every stab-wound PSA reminds us to leave the 'weapon' in, because it slows the bleeding. So I posit that Needle's needles are hollow, promoting fast blood-loss. He even says "This isn’t some poxy blood test," when arguing his scariness, which I think supports this.
What is Mr. Needles? A monster-ified human, or a human-shaped monster? He says he grew up here – does it mean: - he was just regular boring human before he grew prickly (how did it happen?), - or was he once just a tiny itty bitty prickle of unease in the back of somebody's brain, before feeding on collective fear of the locals, and growing big and fearsome, until he could manifest as a fully fledged, physical monster (what prompted it?). - Or was he once a tiny baby monster, toddling underfoot and biting ankles? (kidding ;) Smart money is on the first option, but I rather like the idea of the second. We'll have to wait and see, I guess.
How old is he? He seems to be rather new to the whole 'being a monster' thing, so whatever he was in his youth, I think he became Mr. Needles fairly recently. Like maybe...hm, about a year ago? When some other things started happening for no apparent reason?
Are muggers his usual prey? I doubt it. The line "once they realize their mistake" could mean "they thought I'd be easy mark – oops, surprise!", but it could just as easily apply to "this good Samaritan though I needed help," or "this random passer-by thought I was harmless and not danger to them". He also says he's proud of making the streets unsafe at night, so I think he is a predator that just also happens to eat other predators. Top of the foodchain kind of deal (or at least he likes to think of himself as such).
What is his name? The transcript says 'Needles' and I'm calling him this for now, but I don't believe it's what he calls himself. I bet when we meet him and he introduces himself, it will be with an overly long, pretentious edgy name, sth like Dr. Sharp, the Terror that Stabs in the Night, or similar.
What does he mean by "the land is marked now, same as me"? What happened to the land? Too much man-made destruction (physical mark)? Too many man-made tragedies (metaphysical mark)? An apocalypse seeping in from a nearby universe (eldrich mark)? Something else? All of them at once? What? *gnawing at my keyboard over a tiny inconspicuous remark*
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peligrosapop · 6 months
Note
Hey. As an Israeli who always believed in peace and the idea of two countries.
Innocent people have been killed, raped, burned alive and tortured. I don’t wish to anyone to get a message that there is a HAMAS terrorist outside your home. HAMAS is not Palestine and the people in gaza are suffering because of Hamas just like we do.
Yesterday, the idf found 40 bodies of babies without their heads. Please pray for peace and for the innocent people. Life is so scary right now.
I don’t support the Israeli government and I’m scared for my life.
Hello there! First if all: I’m sorry that this is happening to you at the moment, I too wish por peace, for peace is found when the Occupation seizes. I wish for you safety and of your loved ones. Fuck that right wing government forever.
I know you might be scared but your country seems scary to me, more than Hamas, because you guys have an actual billion dollar military apparatus with backing the 1st world unlike Hamas, BUT Hamas can be scary as well, as any armed group could be. You know how you feel about Hamas this week? That’s how Gazans feel everyday of their lives since the Occupation began and even more so after the blockade. So, always, remember that. People on the other side are humans too, with lives, houses and families and just like you wish to leave in peace, this people as well.
I too hope for peace for all sides, but peace is only real if the occupation ends. Simple as that. I would ask you to look aside of the teaching and propaganda internally in Israel and join the thousands of Israelis and Jews world wide that favor to end the occupation. Also, you have genocidal crazy people elected leaders, very worrisome, hope that changes because if not, I don’t see this ending well for either side but even worse for Palestinians.
As per the claims extreme violence or rape and baby killing: Hamas are a guerrilla group, obviously they will kill, from what I have seen it’s been mainly soldiers but I haven’t seen, even from reporters on the ground any real reports of torture, rape or baby killing that weren’t later debunked by trusted sources. Killing and bombing, yes, obviously. I’ll give examples
Torture of pregnant women: debunked. Although Hamas isn’t knows for respecting bodies of IDF solders they kill, they have never had a history or rape/torture of civilians as a tool of war (unlike other armed groups and certain brigades in certain wars *cough* US Soldier in Iraq*cough* like we have seen the Sudan-South/Sudan conflict for example or ISIS, by the way Hamas hates ISIS. btw I just saw in the news that An Israelí woman and her child were release by Hamas to show good faith; let’s see where that goes. And female IDF soldiers captured by Hamas (I saw a video I can look it up if you want) were put in a different building to be safe but there are conflicting reports on this, no reports of rape though. I dislike Hamas for many reasons but I want them to be truths, not lies.
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40 baby decapitation killing: debuked by IDF and the White House after a false statement from Biden
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Hamas going after civilians on that rave: (Gaza Experience Rave which I find unethical but okay) slightly debunked (full video tweet here )
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Some photos from Inside Gaza, the real war crimes: cut off from humanitarian aid, water, electricity, medical supplies, etc. 9 UN officials have died from bombing and thousands dead just for being home (50% of Gaza’s population are children)
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And a video reporting on Gaza, since we have so much reporting on what Israelis officials and people go through but barely on Palestinians, that are treated with so little humanity:
and last comment: as a person who has live with the dynamics of colonizer and colonized all her life, in Puerto Rico, my father was pro-independence activist who was harassed for it by police and state, we had friends who were actually part of an armed-resistance group and went to jail for it, I have lived with this bullshit before, as I lived the relatively peaceful version of this (it’s violent in other ways) and I personally know people in Puerto Rico who would die fighting the US military for the freedom of our country, which by the UN is a right we are recognized to have (You can look up the Puerto Rican revolt in 1954, they shot up the US congress and also raided a city in PR that was bombed by the US army as an example).The right to fight for freedom. And although I may not agree with all of what some armed Palestinians are doing, I’ve seen in the eyes of people ready to die for that ideal when pushed to brink because they see that peace only works for the colonizer. I leave you this reflection.
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Solidarity now. Solidarity forever
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samoankpoper21 · 7 months
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Giving Birth to Humanity's Strongests' Kid
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A/N I may or may not do a modern! au version of Levi finding out you're pregnant to how he is leading up to you giving birth. Y/D/N is your dad's name. I was going to use Y/F/N but I didn't want to confuse readers with it being your first name versus it being your father's name XD Enjoy this headcanon^^
Word count: 1272
To say that Hange creeped you out was an understatement. You didn't dislike Hange but as the time grew near, she kept poking and prodding your tummy as if you were one of the few titans she kept hidden on standby for "research purposes". "Hange," you say through gritted teeth. "That hurts." She looked up with large shining eyes, blushing, exclaiming, "But how can I NOT be amazed?!?!?! You're about to give birth to humanity's strongest kid!!" You shuddered as you watched her wipe a trail of saliva and continued her gently prodding. You reluctantly gave in and asked, "Shouldn't you be with my husband trying to warm up the new recruits or something?"
"Yeah I should but-oh!" You sucked in a breath, scared of what she may have discovered. "What is it Hange?!" she continued to gently press down on your belly and say, "How odd. I feel 2 bodies in here."
"Eh?!?!?!"
"Hange get away from her." You both looked up to see Levi enter the room. To you it was as if he was moving in slow motion. He could casually be walking and you would describe it as fluid. "Levi!" Hange excitedly exclaim. "I was just telling your wife that I think-"
"Hange, as much as I would love to hear what you have to say, I would like a few short moments with my wife before we leave for our expedition."
"But-"
"Please Hange." Defeated she reluctantly agreed and dragged herself out of the room. As the door clicked shut, Levi sighed and plopped his head down onto your shoulder. He inhaled, both of you reveling in the quietness. "I don't want to go."
"You know the corps can't do this without you. The recruits rely on you as much as they rely on Erwin."
"But what if you give birth while I'm away. I don't want you to experience that alone." Levi whispered. You shushed him by cradling his head, running your fingers through his hair. 2 curt knocks shattered the moment. Levi groaned upon hearing, "Captain! We're ready to head out." Levi pressed his forehead against yours, eyes shut, once more inhaling the scent of you. "Come back to me safely Levi." you whispered. He kissed your forehead and before heading out, he turned around and said, "Oi. I love you you know." You chuckled. "I love you too."
Levi's POV
This expedition was taking longer than he wanted. Levi wanted nothing more than to be at home with his wife, rubbing her belly feeling his baby kick whenever he got near her and to be able to drink black tea. He understood that the whole purpose of this expedition was to prepare that brat Eren to help uncover more secrets of how titans came into fruition but these past 5 days were making him go feral. Every time they would take 2 steps forward, something unexpected happened that caused the corps to take 3 steps back. "Commander Erwin," Miche, the tall blonde with an accute sense of smell approached. "It's about to rain soon. We should head back. The rain will hinder, if any, progress we've made thus far." Erwin sighed in defeat. He knew Miche was right but wanted to press on in pursuit of his own personal agenda. Before Erwin could ask Levi for his opinion a scout came running towards them shouting, "Leeeeeeviiiiiiiiii! Captain Leeeeeeeeviiiiiiiii!" The 3 men stiffened, Levi clutching at his blades. "State your business." Erwin demanded of the younger man doubled over trying to catch his breath. One look at his uniform and they knew he was with the military police. "Captain Levi, your wife...your wife is in labor now." Levi felt as if time had stopped, the world paused. He was brought back with a firm hand on his shoulder. Looking up into Erwin's steely blue eyes Erwin nodded. "We'll be right behind you." Levi ran, jumped on his horse and told the MP member, "Let's go!"
He cautiously approached the tent that the MP had led him to. It took everything in him to try and stabilize himself. He heard a soft coo and, with shaky hands, he pulled the curtain back only to find you laying there with not one, but 2 babies in tow. You looked up smiling. "Levi." He gently approached the bed looking down at the black tufts of hair that were sticking out; an Ackerman trait. "Wha-"
"Come here! Don't be shy." He gently grabbed one of the babies and awkwardly cradled her. "Is this, am I doing this right?" You giggled and motioned him to come closer where you gently laid your son down and helped reposition his arms. He sat in the chair next to the bed rocking your daughter. "Hange was right." Levi looked up confused. "What do you mean?"
"Before you guys left for the expedition she felt my belly and said she felt 2 babies instead of one." Levi chuckled as you continued. "I'm not going to lie, she creeped me out when she kept poking and prodding but now I think I'm almost grateful." You reveled in the moment of Levi holding your daughter,his soft gaze peering down, the way his arms rocked her. You wished time would freeze so you could cherish this moment forever. "What are their names?"
You hesitated before answering, "The boy's name is Furlan, and our daughter, the one that you're holding, her name is Isabel." You bit your lip waiting for Levi's reaction, noting how he had stopped rocking her, his head bent down. The minutes of silence was too much to bear. Does he like it? Does he not like it? What is he thinking? Is he offended? "I didn't officially get to write the names down but, if you want, we can change it-"
"Thank you," Levi whispered. "Thank you for allowing them and their memories to live on." He finally met your gaze, his eyes wet, and you reached out to gently wipe the tears away. "I love you." you whispered. Levi closed his eyes and let his head rest in your hand. "What are their full names?"
"Furlan Y/D/N Ackerman, Isabel Kuchel Ackerman." Another round of uncomfortable silence passed before you ask, "Do you like it?"
"I love it. Thank you," he kissed your hand and stood up to stand beside you. "Thank you for being strong. I know it must have been tough doing this alone but you did great and I am proud of you." he planted a kiss on your forehead. "For being my wife," a kiss on your nose. "And finally for being the mother of my children." He captured your lips while professionally maintaining his hold on Isabel. When he pulled away you were crying tears of joy. "You big baby." he chided. You lightly smacked his arm and watched as Isabel stirred in her sleep. Levi's tongue ticked and noted, "She's rowdy like her name sake." He bent down to kiss you again when the moment was ruined by a loud, "LEEEEEEEEVVVVVIIIIIIIIII!" the curtains swung open and there stood Hange panting and beaming. "Oh ho ho yes! I was right!" she began to wriggle her fingers when Erwin stopped her. "Hange let's let the new parents have their moment."
"Awwww but I want to see how humanity's strongest kids look like."
"You can do that on another date." Hange pouted and reluctantly agreed following Erwin out. Erwin turned to you and Levi and asked, "What are their names?"
"Furlan and Isabel." Erwin offered a sad smile. "Congratulations Levi. I know you'll be a great father."
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bridgeportbritt · 9 months
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Britechester University of SimDonia | Sage, SimDonia
Tour Guide: The great thing about these townhomes is how close they are to everything. Lecture halls, the library, the cafe, and even the theatre which I'm sure, you'll love, Your Royal Highness.
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Ella: I will love that! I'll never be late to ballet practice.
Bria: And, how safe would you say this area of campus is? We are sending off our little girl here all alone after all.
Ella grumbles: Mom...
Emmitt: That's a fair question, Elle.
Tour Guide: Oh, very safe, ma'am. Our campus police patrol the area 24/7, there are emergency beacons all over campus, and of course, The Duchess is welcome to have her protection officers, as well.
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Ella: Guys in dark glasses and suits following me around campus. A very normal college experience.
Emmitt: We'll ensure that they're not intrusive, honey.
Tour Guide: If you follow me this way, I can show you inside one of our model homes similar to the one The Duchess would be staying in if she chose BUS.
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Tour Guide: So, this is a pretty standard 2 bedroom unit. Each home has a kitchen, living space, and each student has their own floor which includes a bathroom.
Bria: And what about roommates? I don't want just any old body living with my baby.
Ella embarrased: Oh my, Watcher!
Tour Guide: You have the option to purchase one bedroom or the entire house for a semester, so if you did purchase the entire townhome, a roommate wouldn't be assigned.
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Bria: Got it. And I'm sure that's a fortune. Will she at least have creative control to make the space her own? Because this place does not scream Ella.
Tour Guide: Um, well, it's not common that students make significant changes... but as long as the unit is returned to its original state, I don't see why not!
Emmitt: Well, we don't want any special treatment...
Bria: And why not?
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Ella annoyed: Mom, you're being so embarrasing!
Emmitt: Uh, Sondra, isn't it? Does the Prime Minister's son, Anthony, live near here? He and Ella are good friends and the Prime Minister is the one who recommended these townhomes to us.
Sondra: Why, yes, Your Royal Highness. The Count lives in this building actually.
Emmitt: That's great, huh, Ella? And good for Ella to have some friends close by.
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Bria laughs: As long as they're not throwing any wild college parties... without me!
Emmitt laughs: I certainly couldn't picture a kid like Anthony or Ella throwing any, what do they say, ragers?
Ella: Watcher, help me.
Emmitt: So, Ella. What do you think? Are you excited? How do you feel about BUS?
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Ella excited: I think... I'm BUS Bound!
Cut to Anthony's first year of college after Emmitt's rager line lolol:
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cinamun · 1 year
Note
the anon here that had something to say about jerri having a baby. first off jerri is always on the run from the cops, she is a “pimp” and doesn’t know how to embrace change. jerri’s mindset is still in correlation with her upbringing ie, constantly calling indya a bitch or a hoe when indya has moved passed her ways. how bout the thought of her calling her own child those names. jerri was scared of indya change because she didn’t want to lose the indya that she used to know. just because she “protected” her sister doesn’t make her valid enough to be a parent. example one the cops just popping up and taking the baby. has jerri been able to spend any real time wit her nieces and nephew ? that answer would be no. not to mention that she fraudulently hooked bishop up wit mercy ! mercy ain’t one of her hoes and she set her up for failure without even knowing it. suppose mercy got killed then what ??? she is not capable of having a child ! is she gonna teach that child to be a pimp or to get her money too ? not to mention she robbed her own brother in law !!!!..................the ghetto! i mean so yea I want all the smoke!
Oh nonny! There you are! I'm so glad you came back AND with an explanation of how you're viewing this here situation. Good thing you just didn't leave it at "that's ghetto", for obvious reasons.
You know how we do, let's get into it!
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"first off jerri is always on the run from the cops, she is a “pimp” and doesn’t know how to embrace change"
Jerri grew up in the same environment her sister did; the streets, on the strip with pimps and hoes, boo. I would argue that Jerri learned the hard way to embrace change whether that was good change (released from prison) or bad change (not accepting her sister's new life).
"jerri’s mindset is still in correlation with her upbringing ie, constantly calling indya a bitch or a hoe when indya has moved passed her ways. how bout the thought of her calling her own child those names"
Come on son, Indya called ME a hoe when she woke up with wrinkles on her face. For both Indya and her sister this is a classic case of taking the sim out of the streets but not taking the street out the sim. Same goes for Darren. So where is this smoke for Indya and Darren?Calling each other bitches and hoes isn't the horrible behavior you think it is for Jerri and Indya. In most cases they are terms of endearment for them. Its just how they talk to each other. You absolutely will not understand that if you don't have some basic concept of street knowledge or lived experience (and I'm about to eat so i can't run it down for you friend).
Also, Indya will call the mail lady a bitch if needed but have you ever heard her call one of her daughters that? Even when she snatched Hope up by the elbow, she never once called her out of her name. Jerri wouldn't either, these are kids. One rule of the streets is let kids keep their innocence (operating opposite will get you killed).
"jerri was scared of indya change because she didn’t want to lose the indya that she used to know"
No, nonny, I wrote this part so let me eat right quick: She was afraid of losing Indya PERIOD. As in, losing her sister to a man (lots of patriarchal trauma in this story). Indya is all she has aside from mom and she hadn't quite embraced Darren so yeah she was scared. But not for the reason you think.
"just because she “protected” her sister doesn’t make her valid enough to be a parent."
What makes a person valid enough to be a parent?
"example one the cops just popping up and taking the baby"
Bro... I literally gave links to explain why Child Protection (an arm of the police) targets Black/LGBTQ+ families. Not saying Jerri is some upstanding citizen, but she's going to be a target for reasons Michelle Alexander so eloquently stated in The New Jim Crow. A book a I very highly recommend.
"has jerri been able to spend any real time wit her nieces and nephew?"
Define "real time".
"she fraudulently hooked bishop up wit mercy ! mercy ain’t one of her hoes and she set her up for failure without even knowing it. suppose mercy got killed then what ???"
Jerri created a singles profile for Bishop ( she was paid handsomely to do it), thought Mercy was a nice match, made the connection and dipped. Its business, never personal. Jerri doesn't just operate street shit, she has expanded her portfolio. Basically I am writing about someone who sells sex no matter what the medium. Because one thing adults are gonna do? Adults are gonna fuck. Its the oldest profession in the world friend.
"is she gonna teach that child to be a pimp or to get her money too?"
I can't tell if you're being facetious but.. of course not, on the pimp part. On the "get her money" part? No doubt. All young women should find the means to be financially stable without assistance. We stan an independent woman who got her own.
Always stay gracious, best revenge is yo paper.
(I realize "whew chile, the ghetto" is popular slang, however the way you used it earlier insinuated that hood folk shouldn't be parents and this post is still giving that energy. I don't think its a fair assumption to say hood folk shouldn't be parents. in fact, it gives Ron DeSantis energy and thats not a good look nonny)
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shdesofred · 2 months
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Very challenging to continue life as normal as we swiftly barrell into WWIII.
Palestine is a small portion of land where so many individuals live, quite literally, boxed in. There has been amble proof to show how they live their lifes, how they experience checkpoints daily several times a day, being interrogated, harassed, and arrested (or worse) by the IOF. They have the ability to arrest and detain Palestinians without providing them an explanation as to why, and refuse to allow them a phonecall or access to a lawyer. The Palestinians are being treated worse than even slaves, because they are being bombed and killed by the thousands with no sign of stopping.
It has become no surprise to me that the United States is more worried about contributing, because they don't care about the lives of their own civilians (let alone others) and will gamble our lives away as pawns in the game that the billionaires who own this country play.
The amount of proof stacked up against Israel should be plenty to show you this is a violent occupation, there are videos everywhere of zionists admitting how they've killed people, who they've killed, bragging about breaking precious family heirlooms and going through women's lingerie.
Bragging about killing babies, quite literally, and the United States is backing that with money from taxpayers who have been yelling that we do not want our money being used in such ways.
What's worse, so many individuals have chose not to care. To turn their heads away and focus only on themselves, completely blind to this situation. Does it make you feel good to act in such a way? And if you claim to be religious, and you've ignored this, shame. Shame on you. Shame on you for going against a religious scripture that always preaches to love our neighbors (AND OUR ENEMIES) so however you look at these individuals, you should not wish death and destruction upon them. Everyone is entitled to live their own life regardless of the choices that they make!
But the United States wouldn't care about something like that, and this isn't the first time. During the Black Lives Matter movement, which soared in popularity following the murder of George Floyd, shows us vital evidence that a murderer, even caught on camera, still is not executed as a result of his actions. Derek Chauvin, a former white police officer, was recorded and there is video evidence of this murder, yet they managed to detain him and allow him to serve prison time. He managed to keep his life and continue to live. The Palestinians are being killed for baseless rumors, they aren't terrorists, they are some of the most peace loving individuals that cry at the lack of ability to pray because they must wait in lines to obtain clean water and use the restroom, these lines taking up to hours long.
How can anybody continue on with their every day life when this is happening? When United States is financially supporting and backing Israel, when we provide all of the weaponry they're using? When we're already broke and in debt? Why bypass congress for war and weapons when we've been begging you to do that for our poor and homeless communities? For student loans and debt, because you promised us this dream of becoming educated and obtaining a well-paying job in our field? There are people out there with several degrees that cannot find a job anywhere. When will we stop pretending everything is okay? Do we need to start rioting? What is happening??
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miss-mania · 5 months
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Alan Wake is a game that asks a lot of questions.
Vital, existential questions like "what if Twin Peaks was written by Stephen King?" and "is a possessed combine harvester a good idea for a video game boss fight?" and "is a possessed combine harvester a good idea for a video game boss fight that happens three times?" and "what is an ocean if not a very big lake?"
Below the cut I'll talk about Alan Wake Remastered, a game I played in preparation for Control and Alan Wake 2, which I imagine I'll also write little reviews for. Lots of spoilers ahead.
The main character of Alan Wake is Alan Wake, a writer; we know this from his gruff monologue at the very beginning of the game in which he says "my name is Alan Wake, and I'm a writer." More specifically, he is a best-selling crime-thriller author who is somehow recognized by everyone he meets when he arrives at the small Washington town of Bright Falls at the beginning of the game for a vacation with his wife, Alice.
These two seem pretty annoying at first, but it ends up not being much of a problem as basically every character you are introduced to from here on out will be successively more annoying than the last. Alan is an asshole; he is standoffish and rude to almost everyone he meets, and holds with a particular contempt his fans. He likes to escalate confrontations astoundingly quickly, which we learn after he has an argument with his wife at the lakeside cabin where they're staying. His wife is almost immediately partially-refrigerated when she falls into the lake, and Alan dives in to save her.
The next thing we know, Alan Wake...wakes up next to a crashed car at the bottom of a cliff, and the first level begins much in the same way nearly every level will from now on; by showing you a distant landmark you must get to, and making you trek through miles of spooky woodland while being accosted by what appear to be the shadowy specters of angry lumberjacks. Two things quickly become clear; first, something is very wrong in Bright Falls.
Second, Alan Wake is an abysmal writer. This is very unfortunate for us, the player, as we begin to piece together the story through pages of a manuscript written by Alan that he doesn't remember writing; a manuscript that seems to predict his future. Every manuscript page is a paragraph or two long and sucks badly. In one page reminiscent of a reddit 2sentencehorror post, Wake writes:
"I was finally out of the woods and things were looking up. That's when I heard the chainsaw." Manuscript pages are constantly telling you "look out, there's a chainsaw guy up ahead" or "some CRAZY story thing is about to transpire". In rare moments of actually serving a narrative purpose other than the most direct and literal foreshadowing possible, these pages describe events happening outside of the scope of the player's experience, off-camera interactions between the various characters. Unfortunately these are still written (and read aloud by Alan) in the same utterly tedious prose as the rest.
This is a very good example of an amusing thing this game feels the need to constantly do; justify its own schlock, lampshade its own game-ness. After the fourth or fifth time Alan has fallen off a cliff for the purposes of transporting himself to a new part of a level or depriving himself of his weapons, he literally narrates: "I had fallen off so many cliffs lately that it was ridiculous." He wonders aloud why the police chasing him have flashbang grenades, a weapon that proves to be very effective against the aforementioned shadow lumberjacks. He asks the player "who designs these things?" of the baby's-first-puzzle-game labyrinth he has to navigate to shut down a power station.
It's ok though, there's a reason for all of it: Alan Wake wrote it that way. It turns out that during a week-long fugue state between his wife being maybe kidnapped and him waking up at the bottom of his first cliff, he wrote the manuscript you've been finding pages from; you see, the lake in Bright Falls is magical and makes anything he writes come true. It is also home to a "dark presence" who has taken his wife and forced Alan to write a story in which it frees itself from its lake prison to...possess lumberjacks, hunters, and other men wearing flannel shirts. Presumably it had bigger plans after that.
With the help of the lake's previous tenant who had first unintentionally freed the dark presence, Wake is able to write an ending to the story in which he saves his wife and defeats the dark presence, but insists through his narration that the story has to have a logical and satisfying progression and have stakes in order to work. He is never given any reason to actually believe he can't just write "and then Alan killed the dark presence and saved Alice and they totally fucked, the end", but he has to believe it so that the story-within-a-story that constitutes the bulk of the gameplay can take the most contrived form possible; that of an action video game in which you have to kill ghastly country folk while traversing the dark woods wherein the presence has the best chance of killing you.
Alan Wake is a game with a philosophy. It doesn't play by the rules of most over-the-shoulder 3rd person action games of the xbox 360 era. Imagine, if you will, a game where you don't win by just going from checkpoint to checkpoint shooting guys with a gun until they are dead. Instead, you have to shine a flashlight in their face for 3-10 seconds before shooting them with a gun until they are dead. "Great", you might think. "A game that does something different." You fool. You absolute fucking buffoon. Throwing flashbangs and flares to disintegrate the people possessed by the dark presence has little functional difference to annihilating the droves of gangsters thrown at you in Max Payne. Every enemy merely has a "shield" that you have to break down using light before you can blast one of the five enemy types with one of four weapons the game provides you with. This isn't a fun little gimmick that exists for one level; this is the whole fucking game and it is excruciating.
The light-shining and gun-shooting and puzzle-navigating is confusingly punctuated by bits of exploration, wherein you might collect more manuscript pages, or collect coffee thermoses that don't do anything other than serve as a nod to one the game's clear inspirations, Twin Peaks. Occasionally you are asked to drive through the actually very scenic Pacific Northwest countryside to get to a faraway location. You can get out of your car during these segments to collect more thermoses, manuscript pages, or even just...commandeer one of the many cars that are apparently left with their keys in the ignition for you to take should you accidentally ruin your own.
The action does escalate throughout the course of the game, new variations on enemy types are introduced: you have the fast, skinny guys who close in on you, the slow tanky guys with big axes who take longer to whittle down with your flashlight, guys who throw their axes at you from a distance, and finally the guys with chainsaws who take much flashlight and many bullet to put down. I suppose it is unfair of me to say there are only five enemy types; you also have to scare away flocks of possessed ravens with your arsenal of lights. Sometimes, inanimate objects are brought to life by the dark presence to hurl themselves at you again and again until you whittle down their darkness shield. Sometimes, in reverence to some of Stephen King's most coked-out work, these inanimate objects are tractors or harvesters or in one case, an evil monster truck.
I'm gonna be straight with you; the boss of the game is a tornado of junk and cars that you have to shoot with a flare pistol while you are accosted by birds. It is certainly a creative choice.
If this sounds entertaining to you, that's because it actually is. Despite my griping I found myself often enjoying the spectacle of it; as the darkness grows stronger, whole set pieces begin to become possessed; Alan has to shuffle his painfully slow ass across bridges tearing themselves apart to kill him and dodge through forests where the trees groan and collapse in an effort to squash him or stop him from progressing. The scale of it as it escalates is undeniably cool.
I don't think Alan Wake tries to understand its own most striking influence; only a couple games I can think of have tried to capture the vibe of Twin Peaks, and both this and the other one, Deadly Premonition, are in my opinion worth playing in spite of their many flaws. That said, Alan Wake often forces me to envision a nightmare world in which Twin Peaks: the Return totally fucking sucked. Can you imagine if there was a plot twist where it turns out the Log Lady was the one leaving the caches of shotguns and grenades for Dale to kill the spooky woodsmen with? Can you envision a Twin Peaks where David Lynch and Mark Frost felt it was necessary to explain how and why the fish got in the percolator, or decided to have cheesy flashbacks to Dale and Diane's relationship? Thanks to Alan Wake I can and I fucking hate it.
It does a much better job of evoking Stephen King. Like much of King's catalogue, Alan Wake is not a particularly scary example of the horror genre, but it's not really trying to be; it's trying to tell a fun story of "what if everything a guy wrote came true" and fill that story with a bit of horror, but action and romance and humor and a Pyrrhic victory of light over darkness. Despite its clumsiness it's charming and I can see why people like it even if it's not really for me.
If you like third-person action games, you should play it. If you like games that are spooky but not too scary, you should give it a try. Just be prepared to roll your eyes at some corny dialogue and maybe sigh in resignation when you see that it is once again time to trek a huge distance and juggle your flashlight, shotgun and road flares through some fairly unique but repetitive action. Hell, you might even end up being charmed by it like so many others have since its release. I know that despite all my complaints I'm looking forward to seeing what weirdness the second entry has in store.
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someweirdoreblogger · 7 months
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Buddha would do so much ridiculous outlandish shit with his kid, I believe. He just wants his child to live life to the fullest and wishes to show them the potential of all the experiences they could grasp in the world, time is a very precious treasure no one can ever get back once they spend it, a most delicate currency. Buddha is very protective, maybe overbearing on bad days, but by no means an isolating father.
Buddha is an independent man who knows the deep value of the enlightenment he received and feels wholly responsible for teaching his beloved offspring the blessings of life, happiness is a feeling you must seek yourself and find in others around you. Happiness and love do not grow on trees.
The world is flawed, and Buddha will not hesitate to state blunt facts, brutal honesty, and hard truths. Even without Gods, the heavy influence of man and monster will exist regardless of otherworldly influence. While one may never wander out of the sights of the gods who roam everywhere in this world, they can be taught how to bear weight of preparations and learn value of free breath; in a world that will prove to care little about his children's feelings, you must expect hardship and steel the will thiefs and warlords will try to take from you.
Buddha is critical but carefree about the gods for his own fair share of understandable reasons, but he knows there is no perfect guarantee that his children will achieve enlightenment, not in the same way he had. Assuming they even want it in the first place, there is a solid reason why there is no one else like Buddha within his Pantheon and why he prefers keeping it that way.
Honestly, would Buddha want his childern to have his powers or techniques? How would he feel, seeing his childern-his sources of happiness and joy-struggle with the harsh reality of their numerous powers, immortality, and upbringing as blessed children of the Buddha? A sense of pride perhaps, as any proud father will feel seeing their little ones grow so fast. But also, maybe guilt will be a factor? Will he breathe a soft sigh of relief over his babies if he sees not a hint of godhood inside them, a hint of worry that his childern won't surpass their mortal bodies to be able to properly protect themselves in a plane of gods that want to shatter Buddha in itty bitty pieces?
With divinity comes authority, and with authority comes power. And with power-a bred chance of corruption, either from the separation of yourself or from outside protest. No God nor man ever entered a potential challenge fairly. Not even Buddha himself is excluded from guilt.
Knowing you're the official offspring of the Buddha will weight down heavy on any small child from any great, similar power. Because thats all humans and other Gods will ever see them as, just children of power, just Buddha's "heirs." But to alsobinherit his signature techniques or even the distant possibility of his future vision? It will be a lot of responsibility to bear, and as patient and geniunely confident as Buddha is and will want to his dearest children to grow slowly in their own skin as they finally hit puberty- any sort of reign over the paths (Literally Buddha's home realm) is a sacred power Buddha will need to acknowledge and teach his kids how to properly control or things will end up pretty badly very fast. (And Buddha knows if he doesn't handle it, others will. and by Heaven's milky tit Buddha won't allow any merger god come by his own fucking house, police his parenting and think they can just come in like they rule the damn place take his precious gems away from him just because 'the ones above' think they will be liabilities.)
That sort of divine strength can challenge and kill gods, very likely send his childern down an emotional spiral of questioning self-worth and expectations, not to mention how many heads that sudden disruption of power will eventually turn. Buddha cares not for nosy people who won't mind their own business, especially when it comes to the affiars of his own children, which Buddha wholly believes he can handle himself little to no problem. If anything goes out of hand, Buddha will set it straight before any damage can be done, he promises.
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mjalti · 2 years
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Never thought I'd be asking about this but life works in ugly ways. My partner had a stroke and right now it's like he went back to being a baby. I'm taking care of him on my own (sometimes with the help of my sister) because he's got no real family. I remember you explained your dad's situation once and talked about not encouraging helplessness and instead giving him tasks to complete and stuff and I was wondering if you had any advice as to how to do that? And how to know he's ready?
hi; I'm so sorry to hear that.
I can share with you what my experience with my father was but obviously adjust it for your situation.
The first thing I did was research the best foods to give him ,which eventually led me to the ketogenic diet. I honestly think this was crucial in my father's recovery. A high sugar diet will encourage him to sleep [think of yourself after thanksgiving or a big meal; are you ready to do math work or take a nap?] I used this bc his brain is going to be inclined towards sleep already [recovery mode]; and you'll want him to be as energetic as possible when he is awake.
STICK TO A ROUTINE: for people after a stroke, previous tasks will be very confusing. stick to an easy schedule. morning everyday is breakfast at [your time], lunch at [specific time], dinner at [specific time].
There is this phenomena called learned helplessness in which a person who is capable of a task will not do it bc the people around them do it; in turn the muscles "atrophy". So if you want him to recover, you have to think about things oriented to his independence. See how capable he is of eating his own meals, putting on his own shoes, etc. When my father was returned to us, he was in what is known as a "vegetable" state. So 100% dependent. By the end of year 2 he was almost ~90% independent. The first things we did were writing/reading tasks. You always want him to know his address/your info, in case he leaves the house and has no way of getting home. So keep a card in his wallet explaining the situation "MY NAME IS [X], I HAD A STROKE [DATE], IF YOU ARE READING THIS PLEASE CONTACT MY CARETAKER [your name] AT [phone number]. IF YOU ARE THE POLICE, MY ADDRESS IS [address]. He needs to be able to perform on the MMSE; he needs to be able to independently offer his name, location, time, among other things. Practice with a clock.
Exercise was crucial to my father's recovery. I cannot speak highly enough of yoga and walking. Yoga ended up giving almost his FULL range of motion back, and walking strengthened his feet.
My father was a [lets say carpenter] by trade so we got him toys like these at Walmart, because muscle memory is extremely powerful and will prompt him back to "life". One thing my father loved was a specific type of song. He lost his ability to speak [multiple intubations etc], but for a person to speak again [or try!] they have to WANT it; so we played his favorite songs on loop quietly throughout the house or on headphones with him specifically and eventually he started trying to sing along [very very hoarsely at first!].
You need to be able to give him tasks and see how much he can accomplish. He seems like a baby now; he is, his brain is "learning". But he will JUMP to age 4, age 8, age 15, age 20 etc. within the range of the year.
Get reusable bed pads [he will probably wet the bed] and mattress protectors, and reusable diapers. Keep a diaper bag on you of essentials [I kept first aid kits, water bottles, keto snacks, medicines, printed list of medications and doctors [in case there were emergencies and we had to end up in the ER bc my father's case was very very precarious], and extra changes of clothes, diapers, wipes,]
Give him small tasks at a time. The first things my father could accomplish was raising his hands and feet on command [im sure you saw the doctors and nurses in the near ICU doing that with him too]. Practice that every day, several times a day. raising the arms, knees, bending the legs, being able to catch a small beach ball, etc. Little, little things, enough to keep him moving and increase his range of mobility. Once he did that, we would help him out of bed [for my dad, getting out of bed independently came MUCH later], and see how many steps he could walk. We would use a belt-like harness to help him walk. At first, it was a few steps. Then a lap around the room. Then a lap around the house. Then a few laps around the house; then once around the block. over the course of ~1.5 months with daily practice. Once he is able to do that, you can focus on giving him self-care tasks. Using a washrag to give himself a "bath" [wet the towel with some soap and he is able to clean his body while sitting on the couch], combing his own hair, brushing his own teeth, eventually being able to toilet himself.
Look into adult daycares or rehabilitation centers around you. They will help set a schedule for you.
On top of all of this. You will NEED to come up with a plan for YOURSELF. caregiver burnout is very real, and you will feel so many more emotions in the coming year. If you are in a position to, PLEASE get a therapist in the moment and set up your therapy days. I promise you, in hindsight, it will be the best gift you give yourself.
it took my father about 2 years to be able to be alert and oriented, truly, and independent almost fully. My father was also like 58 years old. Age is a factor to consider when recovery is in question.
Talk to his doctors and nurses about additional resources for you and him. I don't know when he was caught having the stroke, or how much time passed after he was found, because "time is brain" and thus each person in recovery is in a different, nuanced position but your nurses and doctors will know his case best.
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