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angstyandromanticwriting · 1 month

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Margot Robbie X Fem!Reader Angsty, Cute and Fluffy Imagine Prompt

• There will be more!

!TW: Suicide attempt(s) + intentions + consideration, substance abuse (drugs/medicinal pills + alcohol), implied suffering from depression, elements of self-doubt, mention of loss (the death of a parent), mention of being previously abused (by a family member), self put-down(s), elements of anxiety + separation anxiety, swearing, mention of previous sexual occurrence + an implied sexual occurrence, implied suffering from a mild form of PTSD, presence of alcohol, experiencing a break up, presence of blood, implied self-harm - if I’ve missed any, let me know ❤️!

“Your sister warned me about this,” Margot mused, a pained expression on her face after she had returned home to find you trying to take your life again by overdosing on sleeping pills, but she had managed to come back before you could as she had forgot her bag, and was making to retrieve it when she caught you with the pills that she’d never seen you use, before.

You would frown, before bowing your head whilst tears threatened to escape your eyes; you’d never intended for her to return and find you in this state again as you had planned to take the pills first, before leaving and finding somewhere else to be your final resting place so she would no longer be burdened by you, feeling as if - ever since you’d both first met, and fallen in love with one another - you had been a burden on her ever since you’d both been friends in college together, when she had always believed otherwise; that you could never be a burden on her as she loved everything about you, though you couldn’t imagine why. You’d never thought - after you had lost your mother, and started being abused by your father some time ago, now - that someone perfect like her could ever love a supposed nobody like you, as that was what you had always been made to believe, since your sister had left town to avoid your father’s wrath, ultimately leaving you alone with him, except you didn’t mind it, anymore, feeling as if you deserved the beatings; deserved to be punished for everything wrong with the world as you believed it all to be as a result of your pathetic existence.

Upon reminding yourself of these thoughts you’d had after Margot had briefly gone out, your heart would sink, whilst you would appear crestfallen, wishing she could see that she deserved better than you, though you knew it would be painful to lose her as you felt as if you had been made to shower her with the love you held for her, and always would, and knew that you would lose everything if she ever decided she didn’t want you anymore, something she’d never found herself wanting to do as she loved you too much to let go of you, and knew she’d probably never be able to love anyone else the way that she loved you, and always would.

“About what?” You asked, as if you had no clue, and she would tilt her head partially, wishing you’d just be honest with her, and stop trying to hide your feelings from her; she hated thinking that you were silently suffering whilst putting on as brave a face you could for her, especially when she had no clue as to what the reason for your behaviour was, fearing that you no longer loved her, and simply didn’t want to be with her anymore, when you could never feel that way, believing that she was your soulmate, and always would be; she was the only person who could provide you with a reason to live, now, but it was hard to cling to it when you could see that you were upsetting her by being the way that you were - something you’d never intended to do, and hated yourself for, especially when you’d only ever wanted to make her happy to the best of your ability, and seemed to be failing like you believed to have failed everything else in life, as well, leaving you feeling worthless, and as if she would be better off without you though she couldn’t seem to imagine her life without you in it, and it scared her to think about the possibility that one day she could return home to find that you were no longer there. This reminder would prompt her to feel empty, and numb whilst she glanced back over at you, a hurt look on her face, and tears threatening to escape her stunning icy blue eyes again; she’d found herself trying not to cry when she first noticed the bottle of pills in your right hand, knowing immediately what you were going to try and use them to do as she’d never seen you using them before, and had got a bad feeling to suggest that her assumption was right.

“You,” she answered, before gesticulating to the bottle of pills that she’d previously confiscated from you, and you would wince, before lowering your gaze again whilst you fidgeted with your hands, and internally cursed yourself for being so stupid, and not leaving before she could return, and find you doing what you had been about to try and do, assuming that by doing so you would have spared the hurt of her seeing you trying to take your life again, though she would be worried all the same if she came back to just find you gone, without you telling her where you intended to go like you both often did during the day, before going out somewhere like to the shops, or to a set. “D-Doing-.. shit like this,” she clarified, her voice briefly trembling whilst you did, and you would nod gravely, not surprised, whilst you found yourself feeling guilty again upon hearing that she was trying not to cry alongside you; you hated seeing her upset, and it pained you more than anything ever had, before, “why would you even wanna do that again? I thought you were happy, o-or have you just been lying to me? Do you not want to be with me anymore, is that why?”

“Of course I still wanna be with you,” you answered dejectedly; you couldn’t believe she’d ever think something like that; think that you didn’t want to be with her anymore, “I - I love you, Margot - I always have, you - you know that, right?”

“Yeah, but-.. why? Why do you keep trying to - to do stuff like this?” She questioned, and you would tense up a little whilst you thought back to your reasoning, afraid of how she might react, and of upsetting her again if you told her. “You know you can tell me anything, right?” She pried, and you would nod hastily, knowing that if you hesitated she would be further upset, and worried, and you couldn’t allow that to happen; couldn’t upset her any further than you could see than you already had.

“I’m-.. I’m not-.. ready,” you claimed feebly, your voice close to a whisper, and she would frown, before nodding gravely; she understood that it was hard, but hated to think that maybe she had done something somehow to make you want to try and take your life again, when that was far from the case; it was only down to your thoughts, feelings, and beliefs alone. “C-Can we talk about it another time, maybe?” You suggested, and she would hesitate, before nodding, and sitting down beside you so she could hook her left arm around your waist in the best way possible, allowing her to ease you closer to her whilst you subconsciously rested your head on her left shoulder, and would wrap your arms around her whilst you snuggled closer to her, feeling safer and more content than you had ever been before whenever she was with you, and cradling you close to her like she was, now.

“Of course we can, just-.. promise me that you’ll tell me when you feel like you can, okay?” She requested, and you would nod, yet again trying not to hesitate for fear of worrying her or upsetting her any further.

“I’ll tell you when I feel like I can, I promise,” you stated, and she would express relief, glad, whilst you would smile softly up at her, prompting her heart to skip a beat whilst she reflected your smile, resulting in you forgetting how to breathe whilst you admired her, and would play with her hair using your right hand, and she would subconsciously lean into your touch. “Can I-.. k-kiss you, or-?” You inquired, not wanting to do it without her permission, and she would grin over at you, evidently amused by your request whilst you would appear flustered, blood rushing to your cheeks whilst you silently begged her to let you as you were desperate to feel your lips against her’s again, finding that kissing her always made you feel warm and fuzzy, and that was a feeling you never wanted to lose, like how you hoped you’d never lose her as she made you happier than you’d ever been, before, whenever you weren’t finding yourself thinking about why someone perfect like her was wasting her time on a supposed nobody like you.

“Of course you can,” she answered, prompting your smile to grow a little more whilst you appeared relieved that she wasn’t teasing you about your previously quite shy demeanour, “you don’t have to ask me, silly.”

“R-Right, sorry,” you replied barely audibly, and she couldn’t help, but giggle, before she shook her head, and you would appear further flustered.

“You’re adorable,” she remarked, and you would make to protest, but she would lean closer to you to delicately connect her lips to your’s before you could, prompting you to instantly falter whilst you melted into the kiss, and she would ease you even closer to her to ensure that there were no gaps left between you both whilst the kiss began to deepen, surprising you, but you would welcome it once you’d managed to relax into it, feeling empty and sad once the kiss had sadly come to an end once you both found yourselves having to stop so you could breathe, giggling breathlessly together whilst she affectionately connected her forehead to your’s. “I - I love you, you know that, right?” She inquired hopefully, and you would nod whilst you smiled lovingly over at her, wondering what you’d done to deserve someone as good as her whilst she beamed back at you, glad to hear that you still knew, and hadn’t yet forgot again like you sometimes appeared to, worrying her whenever you did quite quickly as - whenever you did seem to forget, you found yourself in more of a depressed state, and she couldn’t bear to see it happen; she hated seeing you in so much pain, and hated to hear you doubting yourself, and her love for you.

“I love you, too,” you returned, your voice close to a whisper, before you shyly lifted your right hand up to her left cheek, prompting her to smile over at you again warmly whilst blood rushed up to her, as well as your cheeks, and she would lean into your touch subconsciously whilst she found herself briefly getting lost within your eyes in the best way possible, “and I always will, I promise, n-no matter what happens, a-and I’ll never stop, even when you decide you don’t want me anymore-”

“Hey,” she cooed faintly, a hurt look on her face again, “I’m never going to stop wanting you, I promise, so don’t ever worry about that happening, because it never will, okay?” You would hesitate, before nodding slowly, and she would try not to worry about you again, leaning forward to kiss you delicately to get you to smile again, whilst she also surprised you by using her right hand to tickle your left side, startling you whilst you squirmed within her embrace, and giggled uncontrollably; your sides were your weakest point - she knew you too well, now. “Oh, sorry - are you ticklish there?” She teased, whilst you tried to escape her hold by attempting to tickle her, but she would manage to evade your efforts, managing - even - to playfully pin you down on your back upon the sofa whilst she grinned down at you victoriously, glad that she had evidently won against you, whilst you would appear flustered, noticing the position that you both were in. She would then smirk upon noticing the look on your face, before tilting her head partially whilst she straddled you, keeping you trapped beneath her blissfully, as if she thought you would try and escape her, when really you’d rather stay like this beneath her, revelling in the moment. “Would you-.. maybe be up to having some fun, with me, or are you tired?” She asked, not wanting you to feel as if you had to, and you would appear further flustered whilst you tried to hide your face from her, for a moment, feeling that you had begun to blush profusely.

“I - I don’t mind, but - aren’t those people still expecting you for that interview thing you were gonna do?” You inquired, not wanting her to stay for you, and waste her time on you anymore instead of her career, feeling as if you weren’t exactly worth it, like she believed you to be, unbeknownst to you.

“I could easily call it off?” She suggested, and you would hesitate, before shaking your head gravely, and she would try and hide that your response had disappointed, as well as worried her again as she couldn’t help, but think: what if you were only lying to her about still feeling the same way for her, or were afraid of disappointing her due to how you always appeared to be hesitant, and tended to pull out of fooling around with her ever since you’d both started going out together though you’d both fooled around before whilst you were both drunk during a college trip, and little did she know that you had also been worried about disappointing her whenever occasions like these took place, leaving you worried that maybe she’d not want to be with you anymore if you did end up disappointing her, somehow, so you tended to try and avoid it to the best of your ability though it made you feel guilty to see that she appeared a little sad that you’d turned down the opportunity to fool around with her again.

“I don’t want you to think that you have to do that for me,” you admitted timidly, whilst Margot would frown, before shaking her head, and relocating her right hand down to your left cheek, prompting your heart to skip a beat whilst you subconsciously admired her, forgetting how to breathe for a moment, “n-not that I don’t want to fool around with you, you know I do; I - I’d love to, but-.. your work is more important than I could ever be-”

“It’s not,” she contradicted, “Y/n-”

“A-Anyway, we-.. we could always fool around later,” you reminded her, and she would lift an eyebrow whilst she considered it, and would then smirk, before nodding, and leaning down to delicately, and yet passionately kiss you blissfully, and you would instantly melt into the kiss whilst blood rushed to your cheeks, and you would grow to be further flustered whilst you stammered a little once the kiss had sadly ended, “I’m guessing that means you would want to?”

“More than anything,” she answered, “why wouldn’t I? Would - you - be up for it? I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable if you’re not-”

“Of course I’m up for it,” you reassured her hastily, surprising her, but she would express relief whilst she smiled warmly down at you, and would affectionately connect her forehead to your’s again after playfully booping the tip of your nose with her’s, prompting you to grin up at her whilst your eyes glinted following them locking with her stunning icy blue ones in the best way possible, “e-especially when I’ll be able to actually remember it happening, this time - remind me not to get drunk, baby, please.”

“Don’t worry - I won’t let you forget a second of it, this time,” she cooed, before begrudgingly checking the clock, and rolling her eyes; she’d have to leave in a few minutes, or so, if she wanted to get to the place on time for her interview, “I should go, but I suppose the faster I leave, the faster I’ll be able to get back home to you - just promise me something.”

“Anything,” you replied, noticing that she appeared a little anxious to be leaving after she’d discovered you about to try and take your life, prompting you to feel guilty again whilst your heart ached excruciatingly alongside her’s; you hated hurting her like you evidently had been doing recently by being the way that you were, and always had been, ever since you’d both first met in college together, and fallen in love with one another.

“Promise me that you’ll still be here here when I get back, and I swear to god if you hesitate I’m staying-”

You would smile softly up at her, before you leaned forward to briefly, and delicately connect your lips to her’s, silencing her whilst she instantly melted into the kiss, and couldn’t help, but smile against your lips whilst her heart raced alongside your’s in the best way possible. Once the kiss had sadly ended, you would both stare longingly at one another, wishing you could stay like this forever whilst you stroked her hair with your right hand, soothing her more than she ever thought she could be whilst her stunning icy blue eyes seemed to get lost in your’s.

“I’ll still be here when you get back, I promise,” you stated, and she would express relief, glad, “and if you want you can call me at any time and I swear I’ll answer, and probably say something like ‘I love you’.” Margot would appear taken aback; a little more flustered than she had been, before, whilst blood rushed to her cheeks again. You would then smirk up at her, noticing that you’d had the desired effect on her that you had been trying to have, only flustering her further whilst she tried to hide her face from you for a moment, giggling a little in response to your reaction. “I shouldn’t have told you that, actually - now you might not call to try and avoid getting all flustered, like you are, now-”

“Oh don’t worry, I’ll still call,” she reassured, and you would lift an eyebrow, “I promise - just because I love you, and I’m gonna miss the sound of your voice whilst I’m gone.”

You would appear surprised - you evidently hadn’t been expecting her to miss it like you knew you’d miss the sound of her’s.

“I - I’m gonna miss the sound of your’s, too,” you returned, evidently flustered yourself, now, alongside her, and she would smile lovingly down at you, whilst wondering what she’d done to deserve someone as good as you, and you couldn’t help, but wonder the exact same thing - how could someone as perfect as her love a supposed nobody like you believed yourself to be?

“Then I’m definitely gonna call,” she replied playfully, before leaning down to once more passionately as well as delicately kiss you, and then begrudgingly getting up off of the sofa, sadly freeing you though you found yourself now wishing you’d got her to stay with you, instead, until you remembered that it would be wrong if you did, and that you weren’t worth as much as her career is, prompting your heart to sink a little, but you would try and hide this from her whilst you smiled over at her, and got up alongside her whilst she re-retrieved her bag which was rested upon the coffee table after she’d returned to find you about to try and take your life, and would smile sadly back at you, wishing she could stay with you. “I’m gonna try and make it quick, okay?” She cooed, whilst she wrapped her arms around your waist, and would affectionately connect her forehead to your’s whilst you returned the embrace, and would nod. “See you in a bit,” she concluded after briefly connecting her lips to your’s, and then begrudgingly dragged herself out to the front door of her house.

“See you,” you returned whilst you lingered in the hallway, and she would share one more faint smile over at you, before pushing herself to leave, prompting you to begin feeling empty again whilst you began to feel lost, and as if you didn’t know what to do with yourself once she’d gone, surprising you whilst you found yourself trying not to cry for a moment, until you recalled that she would be returning to you soon, partly soothing you enough to pull yourself together a bit more whilst you constantly reminded yourself of this fact, and would try and distract yourself by cleaning things up for her until she returned home, though she’d always insisted upon doing it herself, instead, not wanting you to have to feel as if you had to do it, especially not whilst you were in the state you currently were in.

🜚

Once she had finally returned, you found yourself elated, rushing into the hallway once you’d heard the front door being unlocked, and she would beam over at you as soon as her gaze fell upon you, before closing the front door, and rushing up to you and throwing her arms around you, and you would instantly return the embrace - though she’d called you like she said she would, you still found yourselves missing one another more than you thought you would after speaking on the phone, and checking up on each other, therefore glad to be back with one another again physically as you hated having gaps between you both, and not making contact of any kind with each other.

“I missed you-” You both managed to blurt out together, before appearing flustered, and giggling breathlessly whilst she rested her head on your right shoulder, allowing her to - when you least expected it - press a kiss to your cheek, flustering you even more whilst blood rushed to your cheeks, and she would smirk over at you when she noticed that you had so easily begun to blush quite profusely. You would then try and hide your face from her though she had already seen that you were blushing, prompting her to delicately turn your head with her right hand on your left cheek so she could blissfully lock eyes with you for a moment, before she leaned forward to connect her lips to your’s in the best way possible, and you would instantly melt into the kiss whilst you revelled in the warm and fuzzy feeling it was providing you, as well as the feeling of butterflies fluttering around in your stomach whilst the kiss lasted, leaving you feeling empty as soon as it had sadly ended.

“H-How was it? Did you have fun?” You inquired whilst you held her at arm’s length, and she would smirk over at you whilst her stunning icy blue eyes began to glint, prompting your heart to skip a beat whilst it raced alongside her’s in perfect sync like it always did whenever you both were together.

“It wasn’t bad,” she answered, before inching closer to you, flustering you and overwhelming you even further whilst your heart pounded against your ribcage, or felt as if it were; you guessed she had recalled your previous suggestion of fooling around later in the day, technically after she had done her interview, and you would find yourself forgetting how to breathe whilst she affectionately connected her forehead to your’s in the best way possible, allowing you to get lost within her eyes, “but - I was happier being with you; it was so boring without you, honestly - everything is.”

“Really?” You asked, evidently surprised, and she would nod whilst she played with your hair using her right hand again.

“Yeah,” she replied, and you couldn’t help, but smile even wider over at her whilst you leaned into her touch subconsciously, feeling much more relaxed already than you had, before, whilst your heart had been pounding, instead blissfully now racing alongside her’s again like it had been previously before she’d suggestively inched closer to you, “Y/n, you - you always seem to make things-.. brighter, w-whenever we’re together, and I can’t help, but smile whenever I’m with you; you’ve honestly made me so much happier than I’ve ever been, before; I love you so much.”

You would then begin to stammer, evidently flustered again; you couldn’t believe a supposed nobody like you could make someone perfect like her feel that way, and wondered - again - what you had done to deserve her; what you had done to be treated the way she treated you, making you feel as if you were special, and not the freak that you had been made to believe you were by your father, after your mother had passed away, and before you had moved out of his house and into your own apartment.

“I - I love you, too,” you returned feebly, your voice close to a whisper, and quite shaky as you were now finding yourself trying not to cry in front of her, prompting her heart to sink a little; she feared that maybe the tears weren’t happy, and wondered what was upsetting you, “a-and you - you’ve made me happier than I’ve ever been before, too; y-you’re the only person who could ever provide me with a reason to live-”

“Hey,” she cooed gently, a pained expression on her face whilst she did, and you would fall quiet whilst you sniffled, and bowed your head as your face had now contorted; you couldn’t help, but break down, and she would falter upon hearing that you had begun to cry, prompting her to hold you close to her again so you could bury your face into the crook of her neck whilst you cried into it, strained sobs escaping your lips whilst you clung to her shoulders, silently cursing yourself for being so pathetic and weak in front of her, “y-you - you have so many reasons to live - I’m not the only one.” You would shake your head gravely, doubting that, but you would try not to protest, not wanting to upset her or worry her any further about you whilst she blissfully ran her fingers through your hair, soothing you instantly again whilst you revelled in the feeling, and leaned into her touch subconsciously. “Please tell me these are happy tears, at least,” she requested, and you would nod hastily whilst you smiled lovingly up at her.

“I could only ever cry happy tears around you,” you reassured her, and she would express relief, glad as she hated seeing you upset, though it did pain her to remind herself of how your statement wasn’t completely true; she’d often found you crying not-so-happy tears before, and still had no clue why; you’d never told her about your doubts regarding your worth, or your doubts surrounding how you believed you weren’t good enough for her, and could never make her happy the way you believed you had been made to as a result of trying to shower her with all the love you held, and would always hold for her. “I’ve just-.. never felt so-.. loved.. by anyone before,” you mused, and she would frown, before holding your left hand in her right one, prompting you to forget how to breathe again whilst your eyes locked with her’s, and she found she couldn’t resist it any longer as she leaned forward to kiss you delicately, and you would instantly melt into it, even when the kiss gradually began to deepen, and she would lower her bag to carefully ease you against the wall for stability as she wanted to make sure that you wouldn’t fall over, and hurt yourself, not caring much if she lost stability, herself, unless her instability threatened you, too. You would have allowed it to continue, if it weren’t for your fears of disappointing her, and losing her again, prompted to circle around your mind again once she took off her coat hastily, and would make to take off her top, but you would hastily blurt out: ‘stop’ before she could, prompting her to falter, and her smile to fade whilst she glanced over at you, the light of her eyes dimming a little. “W-We can’t-”

“Can’t?” She interjected, a hurt look on her face whilst she did, and you would bow your head, feeling bad whilst you stared down at the ground - it wasn’t like you didn’t want to; you longed to, even, but just felt as if you’d never be able to please her like that, and feared that if you didn’t she’d decide she no longer wanted you by her side anymore, and couldn’t imagine your life without her in it.

“Margot, I-”

“I can’t keep playing pretend, Y/n,” she stated dejectedly, and you would frown, before timidly glancing up at her; you evidently feared what she may be about to tell you; appeared terrified that maybe she were about to break up with you for rejecting her advances again, but she could never do that to you; she loved you too much to, and - like you - couldn’t imagine what her life would be like without you in it; hated the possibility that one day she might lose you for a reason unbeknownst to her, “it’s - it’s like you-.. you just don’t want to fool around with me, ever, but why? We did before-”

“You don’t understand-”

“I think I do,” she contradicted, and you would gravely shake your head whilst you found yourself trying not to cry again whilst your heart ached excruciatingly alongside her’s, “have you been lying this whole time about not remembering what it was like? Because I can’t think of any other reason why you might not want to do this with me-”

“I do want to, I just-.. just can’t, okay?” You continued, and she would nod gravely, before bowing her head again, and then glancing toward the front door as if she wanted to escape from this moment; longed to escape the pain that it was causing both her, and you, whilst you would begin to panic, desperate for her to stay. “D-Don’t go again, babe, please-”

“If you want me to stay, then give me one reason why I shouldn’t leave,” she requested, and you would draw in a shaky breath, before you timidly stepped closer to her, flustering her whilst she longingly looked over at you, and her gaze even tended to drift down to your lips, like your’s did, too, drifting down to her’s, whilst blood rushed to your cheeks.

“I-If you left, I - I wouldn’t be able to show you how much I love you to try and get you to stay with me, u-until-.. until you don’t want me anymore-”

“I’ll always want you,” she stated, before giving in, and wrapping her arms around you whilst she kissed you again, and you would instantly melt into the kiss, trying not to panic about your previous fears, knowing that if you did, you probably would end up disappointing her, before she connected her forehead to your’s again, and would smile warmly over at you, soothing you instantly whilst your heart raced alongside her’s again in the best way possible, “n-nothing could ever change that, I promise; I love you, a-and I always will, no matter what - so-.. would you be up for it? I obviously won’t force you, I just-.. y’know..”

“I’d - I’d love to,” you reassured her, and she would appear elated, before delicately connecting her lips to your’s again, and carefully picking you up off of the ground as you were a little shorter than her, making it easier for her to carry you up the stairs whilst you both occasionally giggled breathlessly together, and shared briefer kisses, before disappearing into your and her bedroom together to fool around with one another sober, this time.

🜸🜚🜸

Despite the fact that things had managed to improve between you both following that previous moment, and you were surprised to find that you hadn’t ended up disappointing her the way that you had worried you might, you would find yourself disheartened again by how you often tended to fail to find work; you often failed your auditions, and didn’t do the best job at your interviews, only making things harder for you, making you anxious about what people might think of you, including Margot as it felt as if you were also failing her, too - something you couldn’t bear, though she never seemed to express anything like this whenever you both were together, seeming - instead - proud of you for trying the way you were despite everything that had previously happened to you with your father abusing you, mentally burdening you though you had now escaped him, and hopefully would never end up seeing him anymore, and even if you did, Margot vowed to never let him hurt you again, certain that she could protect you from him though you feared that maybe he would manage to hurt her, too, and you knew you’d never be able to forgive yourself if she did, so you therefore hoped she’d never have to encounter him, and feel as if she had to try and protect you from him if he ever ended up trying to hurt you, again.

Ever since you had failed your first audition that she had suggested you do, you found yourself already beginning to feel like a failure, as well as a burden on her as you didn’t like that she had felt as if she had to try and help you to find a part you could play - something you’d often hoped you would be able to do alongside her as it was something you both regularly talked about ever since you’d both become friends, and fallen in love with one another in college together - you had found yourself beginning to drink a little more alcohol than you used to as you found you couldn’t stand returning home to her with the news that you had failed yet another audition, or interview, sick of being the way that you were, and believing - again - that she deserved someone better than you, and though you promised her you would stop drinking a little while ago, now, you found you couldn’t though you hated yourself for breaking one of your promises again, like how you’d recently broken your promise you’d made her to stop trying to take your life, and of course she soon found out, catching you drinking during the night in the garden whilst she was in bed following her waking up upon feeling that you were no longer beside her, and discovering that you were no longer with her, panicking her whilst she looked around to try and find you, only to discover you outside with a half-empty bottle of beer in your right hand whilst you were crying quietly into your free left one, contemplating over your recent failures, and the recent ones you couldn’t help, but try and lie to her about by claiming that you had thought the most recent audition had gone better than you actually thought it had.

“Y/n-?” She cooed once her gaze had fallen upon you, and you would appear startled, allowing the bottle to slip from your hands, but it was too close to the ground already to shatter, instead toppling over, and you would curse shakily in a voice close to a whisper, before reaching down hastily to stand the bottle back up before the remains within it could all spill out. Margot would then frown upon noticing the bottle, a hurt look on her face whilst she recalled how you had promised her you would stop drinking recently, and had basically broken your promise. She also couldn’t help, but wonder if this was the first time you had begun drinking again, or if there had been other times behind her back after you had made your aforementioned promise to her, and the bad feeling she was currently experiencing was telling her that her suspicions were right; you had been drinking before this moment even after you had promised her you would stop. “Are you kidding me? Hasn’t this addiction done enough damage, already?” She questioned, her voice briefly trembling whilst she did; she was trying not to cry as she couldn’t believe that you were doing this again, and feared what it might end up doing to you, if you kept on going the way that you were, and had been recently; she couldn’t imagine her life without you in it, and worried that maybe if you kept drinking, she would lose you, somehow, whilst you were hoping that she would be happy, if alcohol did end up taking your life, believing that if she were free of you, she’d be able to find someone better for her, no matter how much you knew it would hurt you to be away from her both whilst you were still alive if she ended up leaving you before, and whilst you were stuck within the afterlife, wherever it would end up taking you to.

“I - I’m so sorry, Margot, I-” You began feebly whilst tears continued to stream down your cheeks, and you would get up off of the seat you had been previously perched unstably upon, having to lean heavily on it as you found you felt faint all of a sudden, as well as a little nauseous; the bottle you’d had in your hand obviously hadn’t been the first one.

“You promised,” she reminded you dejectedly, and you would falter, before bowing your head whilst you nodded gravely, and would try and think of something to say to try and explain yourself, desperate to try and fix the situation, somehow, but before you could, she would muster out in a strained way the two words: ‘that’s it’, before she disappeared back inside, and you would panic, making to rush after her, but you would stagger whilst you tried, before having to use the wall to support you whilst you dragged yourself inside, feeling weaker, and more disorientated than you ever had, before; you couldn’t believe it - that you were losing her already, and despite your previous thoughts, you would try and follow her up the stairs as she made to pack your things for you, not sure of how else to react in a way that could help you, terrified of losing her as you couldn’t imagine what your life would be like without her in it.

“Wait, please!” You begged, but she wouldn’t stop though what she was doing felt wrong to her, and subconsciously longed to stop, and turn around to throw her arms around you whilst you both cried in one another’s arms, and tried to provide comfort to each other, but she would try and tell herself that she was upset with you for breaking yet another promise that you had made her, before, and that she couldn’t trust you to change, though the thought hurt her, and made her curse herself internally for believing something like that about you; she’d always believed in you, and despite what you had been doing recently, she still did - she loved you too much to just stop. “I - I can explain, I swear-”

“Don’t bother,” she interjected, before hesitantly turning to face you, and you would lean against the wall to your left side whilst you silently pleaded with her to stay with you, knowing that by losing her you would be losing everything, including your will to live again - without her by your side, you knew there would be no point to anything, and that everything around you would all just be grey and bleak like it was, before you’d first met her, and fallen in love with her - the first time the sun had ever decided to present itself to you ever since your mother had passed after she’d given birth to you, and your father had abused you before you’d managed to finally move out and get your own apartment after you’d turned eighteen, and graduated from college. “Y-You know I would have done anything for you, right?” She admitted, and you would begin to feel even worse whilst a strained sob fought to escape your lips, but you would try and hold it back, not wanting to upset her any further by breaking down in front of her, knowing that whenever you did she seemed to worry even more about you, and often found herself trying not to cry alongside you as she hated to see you struggling the way that you evidently were, and had been, before. “Would you have done the same? Because sometimes it feels like you don’t even care anymore; you’ve already broken another promise, even though you told me you’d stop after the first one-”

“I tried,” you stated, and she would appear doubtful, prompting your heart to somehow ache even more alongside her own; she couldn’t stand doing this to you, and hoped that it would encourage you to stop drinking, as well as to stop trying to take your life, and instead get you to actually talk to her rather than resorting to hurting yourself even more, “I swear-”

“I don’t believe you,” she claimed simply in a strained manner as if the words were paining her; as if she didn’t mean them, and knew that you weren’t lying to her, “I can’t, I’m sorry.”

“W-What so-.. that’s-.. that’s it, then, for us?” You guessed, trying to hide, and failing miserably, your crestfallen demeanour - you couldn’t help, but despise yourself for hurting her like you evidently had managed to again, prompting the thought that she would be better off without you to circle your mind again repeatedly, and excruciatingly, to the point you found it was even harder to try not to break down in front of her whilst you bowed your head again, and bit down on your bottom lip harshly to try and stop it from trembling.

Margot then couldn’t help, but hesitate, before forcing herself to nod gravely though what she was doing felt more wrong than anything ever had, before, prompting her to find herself on the verge of breaking down alongside you again; she couldn’t take what she was doing anymore, and knew that - though she was trying to help you, and told herself that she would try and fix things between you and her once you’d managed to decide you would try and turn things around - the next few days, if it ended up taking that long, would be the most painful she’d ever experienced before.

“It is, if you feel like you can’t try and stop drinking - do you know how much it hurts me seeing you like this, Y/n? I - I don’t even care as much about you breaking the promise you made me, but - I do care about what you’re doing to yourself; to us,” she expressed, and you would find you couldn’t speak for a moment; it was too painful to even try anymore, and you just wished you could collapse and die, though you doubted the afterlife would be any better, especially without her being by your side; you’d always dreamt of spending eternity with her, and knew now that you most likely never would be able to - it was too painful to stop drinking, especially whenever you were reminded of who you were; a supposed nobody, compared to her - someone who has, and undoubtedly always would be perfect like she had been since you’d first met her, and fallen in love with her during your and her college days. “So-? Can you stop? Because I can’t go on like this anymore; can’t go on seeing you doing this to yourself anymore; you haven’t even told me why you’re doing it,” she recalled, and you would shake your head gravely; you didn’t want to tell her because you knew that she’d be upset by how you thought she would perceive you to be a burden, or a failure as a result of your lack of success with the auditions and interviews you had been doing recently, when she could never see you as anything like that; she loved you too much to, and had vowed ever since she’d first met you, and become friends with you to support you and shower you with the love she held, and would always hold for you to the best of her ability, though you couldn’t imagine why she was even still bothering, and had been bothering to allow you to supposedly burden her like you believed you had always done for this long.

“And I never will,” you managed, a pained expression on your face whilst your voice shook again, and she would frown whilst she wondered why you felt as if you couldn’t tell her, not knowing - again - that it was because you were afraid of disappointing her by telling her that you were positive that you’d messed up your most recent audition and interview again, “I can’t.”

She would then nod gravely, before forcing herself to look away from you though it pained her even more to do so, and you would begin to feel numb, and empty, guessing that what was about to happen would result in what you had always feared - you were about to lose her, and it was all your fault, like everything else bad in the world was also your fault - something your father had made you believe since you’d been able to walk.

“Well I’m sorry you feel that way,” she replied, whilst you would silently beg her to meet your gaze again, but she found she couldn’t, knowing she would break down alongside you if she allowed herself to give in so easily, “I have to go out in the morning, so - you can pack your bags then, and - and leave so I don’t have to come back and fight with you anymore; d-don’t have to see you like this anymore-”

“No, p-please - don’t do this-”

“Night,” she interrupted feebly, and you would falter again whilst she meandered around you, and made to go back downstairs, intending to sleep - instead - on the sofa, panicking you as you thought she was going out.

“Please don’t go,” you begged, evidently terrified of being alone right now after this moment, finding you couldn’t trust yourself not to try and take your life again in this state, “I’m scared; I - I need you here with me, I-”

She would hesitantly stop for a moment, glancing back at you; she didn’t want you to think that you would be alone, knowing that it often scared you to be alone whilst you were in a state like this, and your current demeanour even prompted her to recall the moments in which she cradled you close to her whilst you cried after you had been beaten by your father, and had snuck out to rush to her house, finding you could only feel safe, and more content than you had ever been whilst you were with her, and recalled how - on a trip one time whilst you were both going to college together - she would sneak over to your bed after you’d woken up from a nightmare, and appeared terrified, prompting her to worry about you, and to try and provide comfort to you whilst she held you close to her, and would try and make you laugh and soothe you by playing with your hair until you found yourself falling back into sleep alongside her, every time finding yourself experiencing a peaceful and uninterrupted sleep whenever she was beside you, and holding you the way she had that night.

“I’m just gonna be downstairs,” she stated, and you would realise, before shaking your head again, “I want you to have the bed for tonight-”

“No,” you whined, not wanting her to feel as if she had to sleep on the sofa, instead, when what had previously happened was your fault, and your fault only, “I - I should be sleeping on the sofa, Margot, not you - this is all my fault-”

“I want you to have it, regardless,” she insisted, making you feel even worse for what had happened; you couldn’t believe it, and wished she would - instead - banish you down to the sofa, or kick you out now, feeling as if you deserved this from her, instead of her allowing you to sleep on the bed, and to leave in the morning, “the sofa’s comfortable enough for me, anyway, and it’s still close if you need me i-if you end up having a nightmare, or anything, and are scared.”

“But-”

“No buts,” she continued, before forcing a faint smile over at you, only prompting your heart to sink even more somehow whilst another tear managed to escape, and run down your right cheek slowly, and as soon as she noticed it her smile would falter whilst she hastily looked away again for a brief moment, until she felt able to recover herself, and look back up at you; she didn’t want to further upset you by allowing you to see that she, too, was struggling not to break down alongside you, “just - try and get some sleep for me, okay? You’ll feel better in the morning, if you do.”

“W-Wait,” you continued, evidently desperate to try and get her to change her mind; you were more terrified than you had ever been, before, as you’d never imagined what it would be like to truly lose her, though you often considered how it would be better for her if you just disappeared, and allowed her to find someone who was actually good enough for her, and could make her happier than you had ever somehow managed to before, “please, I love you, I-”

“Just-.. Go to sleep, Y/n, please,” she begged, though she felt guilty again for doing so, especially when she noticed the hurt and dejected expression on your face; she’d never intended to snap at you like that, and couldn’t believe that she just had, “I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean - didn’t mean to snap at you like that, I just-”

“No, it’s - it’s okay,” you tried to reassure her, knowing you deserved it, and that she had every right to be upset with you, you just couldn’t believe how painful it was to be feeling everything within you collapsing the way it currently was, “I should-..” You would gesticulate to the bedroom door a few paces away from you, finding your voice failing you again, whilst she would begrudgingly nod in response whilst staring down at the ground, and trying to fight back her currently invading tears. “N-Night,” you returned, before dragging yourself into the bedroom, and she couldn’t help - once she’d heard the door close - but allow her face to contort whilst she began to cry quietly, trying her best not to allow a strained sob to escape her lips whilst she continued down the stairs, and would sink down onto the sofa in the living room whilst you - unbeknownst to her - curled up upon the bed, hugging one of her jumpers close to you whilst you cried into it, and silently begged her to come back, longing to feel her arms around you again until you somehow managed to fall asleep with only thoughts of her and the future you had always envisioned being with her painfully and tauntingly circling your mind as if it were now out of the picture.

🜸🜚🜸

After you’d left that morning, of course you had tried to take your life more often; it wasn’t worth living without her beside you, and of course you resorted to trying to drink more whenever you failed as a result of your sister catching you in the act, and you even failed to drink as whenever your sister caught you, she would confiscate all the alcohol you realised you had left within your apartment though you hadn’t been there for a little while, now, often previously staying with Margot within her own house. The reminder would often prompt your heart to sink whilst you curled up on the sofa, crying quietly whilst you buried your face into your right arm - things could never be the same again without her, and the pain was excruciating, just like you had suspected it would be, but you couldn’t help, but hope that Margot was happy, now, with you gone, when she found she could only be the opposite of that - ever since you had left, she found herself struggling a lot more than she had, before, sometimes making mistakes in her interviews whenever she got distracted, and found herself thinking, as well as worrying, about you; she often got a bad feeling whenever you were about to try and take your life, and often made sure to call your sister to make sure that you were okay as soon as she could once the interviews or auditions were over as she often struggled to engage in them, too, since that previous painful occurrence that took place between you both.

She also found that - whenever she called up your sister to check on you - she felt guiltier than she ever had before, and wished she could try and make up for what had happened, especially whenever your sister told her about all that you had been trying to do to yourself recently, and about how you were struggling to sleep, making her feel even worse; she even wished, now, that she’d never handled the situation the way she had, whilst you believed it had been right of her to react like that, knowing you deserved it, and were nothing short of the reason to blame for what had happened, hoping - now - that she would soon, if she hadn’t already (which she most definitely hadn’t - unbeknownst to you) found someone better for her that could actually make her happy, as you doubted you ever could, though you longed to spoil her to the best of your ability, and to shower her with all the love and affection you knew you would always hold for her, whether that was soon to be during the afterlife, or for whilst you were still painfully living if you never ended up succeeding in terms of trying to take your life.

An excruciating week or so after the aforementioned occurrence, Margot would be surprised, as well as worried to find your sister calling her, prompting her to begin to dread what might have happened whilst she stared tearfully down at her phone for a moment, considering the possibilities whilst she silently cursed herself for not visiting before, and making sure that you were okay: you could be dead right now, after having possibly succeeded to take your life away from your sister so she couldn’t stop you, this time, or you could have overdosed on alcohol, or been in the process of hurting yourself when you were found, before your sister had called her - all probabilities were painful, and it terrified her to think that maybe she had already lost you, prompting her to hastily accept the call, and lift her phone up to her right ear whilst she turned down the volume of her television as she’d been recently watching it more often to try and distract herself; she couldn’t bear the silence, but even the television was only paining her as you’d both often cuddled up on the sofa together before to watch it.

“Hey, Luce,” she began feebly, her voice briefly trembling whilst she did, and tried to fight back her tears even more though she was struggling not to break down right now, painfully awaiting what Lucy - your sister - was about to reveal to her, “is - is Y/n okay? Are you okay?”

“It’s not Lucy,” you answered, and she would falter, her tears being shocked out of her eyes whilst a shaky sigh of relief escaped from her lips - she hadn’t lost you like she had previously feared she had - not yet, anyway. Her blood would then run cold again, and she knew she’d have to try and fix things, and soon, if she wanted to ensure that you could both remain to be a part of one another’s future, like you had both always longed to be ever since you’d first met, and fallen in love with each other whilst you were both going to college together. “I - I’m sorry, I just-.. I picked up her phone because I was bored, a-and I missed you, and when I noticed your number I panicked and just-.. I miss you so much,” you expressed, your voice briefly trembling whilst you did, and she would smile softly whilst she began to wonder if you, or Lucy would allow her to come over to your apartment; she was desperate to see you again, like you, too, were desperate to see her again, though you doubted she’d ever want to, and knew she probably had found someone better than you by now, or rather you hoped that she had, knowing you’d most likely never be able to make her happy again, after all that had happened recently, and due to the way that you were, and always had been in general. “I know you probably don’t wanna talk to me anymore, and I’m sorry, I just - I had to hear your voice again - everything hurts so much, u-until I hear, or see you,” you mused, “that’s all I know, now - I’m so sorry-”

“N-No, it’s - it’s okay, Y/n,” she managed feebly, “don’t apologise, okay? Of course I still wanna talk to you - I want to help you, and get you through this, so - is there any way I could try and do that for you? Maybe if I came over to see you, or-?” You would fall quiet for a moment, a pained expression on your face whilst you considered her suggestion; you couldn’t imagine why she’d want to come and see you after what had recently happened between you both. Margot would then find herself growing to be worried about you again as a result of your silence, terrifying her as it made her think that maybe you had begun to cry, or had been in the process of trying to take your life, somehow, before you called her. “Y/n? Are - Are you okay? Say something-”

“You could lie to me,” you suggested faintly, and she would appear puzzled, as well as a little disappointed by your suggestion, “I don’t care what it is that you say, just - lie to me; make me feel okay again.”

She would frown, realising; she’d never thought that by effectively breaking up with you, and gently kicking you out of the house, she would have this effect on you, hoping - instead - that it would have helped you to get better; to stop drinking, and trying to take your life when really it had only made things worse for you to be away from her.

“Why would you want me to lie to you?” She asked, and you would hesitate, before deciding to admit to your recent thoughts.

“Because I know that - that you telling me that you love me, care about me, and don’t hate me would have to be a lie,” you explained, and she would somehow manage to feel her heart sink again whilst she shook her head subconsciously, and would brush her tears away to the best of her ability with her left hand though there were more invading her stunning icy blue eyes despite them already being quite sore from her previous crying session not too long ago, now, “you have every right to hate me, now, a-and not love me anymore, I mean-.. I was just hoping that maybe you’d - be able to forgive me, somehow? I-If not I completely understand, and obviously don’t wanna force you, I just-”

“Of course I forgive you,” she reassured, and you would express relief as you had been worried that maybe she wouldn’t, and rightly so; you knew you’d never be able to forgive yourself for breaking your promises, and had begun to hate yourself even more after you had; you’d always hate yourself for hurting her, especially when you believed you had been made to make her happy; to shower her with all your love and affection to the best of your ability, “even though you basically just threw our four years of friendship out the window last week; I-.. I can’t not forgive you, because I-.. I - I mean-.. you mean too much to me, and if I lost you-.. I honestly don’t know what I’d do - this week’s been so much harder than it would have been if you were still here with me, a-and - I honestly hated every second of it; hated every second of being away from you.”

You would falter, a pained expression on your face again whilst you bowed your head, hoping - though you still loved her, and knew you always would - that this didn’t mean she felt the same way for you, still, no matter how much you longed to be with her again, and to hold her close to you whilst you kissed her, and buried your face into the crook of your neck, as well as longed to spend your nights and every minute you could with her, but knew you couldn’t as you knew she deserved better than you, and knew she needed to try and find someone else who could actually make her happy, believing that you couldn’t, and would only end up burdening her even further if she decided she still wanted you, somehow, which she did, and knew she always would.

“But-.. why?” You questioned, and Margot would appear nervous, before subconsciously rubbing her right arm with her left hand though you both weren’t in the same room; she was evidently terrified of what you might think if she admitted to still having feelings for you.

“L-Look, I-.. I didn’t mean-.. to kick you out last week, and nor did I mean to hurt you, or make it seem like I no longer loved you because I do; I only did it because I was hoping you would stop drinking, a-and stop trying to take your life because-.. I love you, Y/n, and I’m worried about you; if you keep on going the way that you are-”

“W-Wait, so-.. you.. you broke up with me and kicked me out to try and stop me from drinking and trying to kill myself? Seriously?” You interjected, a hurt look on your face whilst your voice briefly trembled, and you would find yourself trying not to cry again; you couldn’t believe it, and not just because it had hurt you to lose her the way that you had - it also hurt now to know that she’d done it to try and better you, when you had allowed it to only make you get worse, and you knew - then - that you would end up burdening her further if she tried to win you back, and succeeded like you knew she easily would if she tried - it was too hard for you to not give into her as your feelings for her were overwhelming, and too powerful to deny, especially when she was in the same room as you.

“I - I know, it’s - it was bad, but-.. I’m so sorry, I-”

“You broke me by doing what you did,” you interjected truthfully, and she would falter, before nodding gravely, “but-.. I don’t blame you - it was all my fault, anyway; if I hadn’t started drinking again, and tried to take my life that time-”

“Y/n, no,” she tried to stop you, not wanting you to blame yourself for what had happened, especially not whilst you were like this as she feared that maybe you would try and hurt yourself, or try to take your life again following the ending of the call, prompting her to sit up subconsciously - she knew what she would have to do, now: she needed to go over to your apartment, and to make sure that you didn’t try to take your life again like she feared you would, knowing she wouldn’t be able to survive any longer without you; it was painful enough being away from you like she was, now, but to find herself returning home knowing that you were no longer around was even more excruciating, and she wanted to avoid this scenario as best she could, hoping that this time you would both end up being able to spend eternity together like you had previously planned to, before, and hoped you would both get married like you both had also planned to, and had often talked about before whilst snuggling up together on the bed whenever you ended up having a nightmare, and sought comfort from her beside you whilst she cradled you, and reminded you of your and her future together blissfully every time. “It wasn’t your fault; none of this was your fault-”

“You deserve so much better than me,” you managed weakly whilst she would shake her head again, new tears running slowly down her cheeks whilst she got up off of the sofa, and hastily retrieved her bag whilst occasionally brushing away her tears; she wouldn’t lose you again, “I’m so sorry - I-.. I should never have called-”

“Y/n, wait, please,” she begged, and would then curse in a shaky whisper following you ending the call, before getting a bad feeling again, and beginning to panic even more, and rushing out of the living room, into the hallway, and through the front door with the intention of stopping you from trying to do what you were about to do whilst you set down Lucy’s phone dejectedly, before dragging yourself into the bathroom, locking yourself in, and retrieving the razor, as well as one bottle of beer out of six that you had managed to hide from your sister.

🜚

Once Margot had arrived at your apartment, Lucy would appear surprised as she hadn’t been expecting her to visit so unexpectedly, the look on her face already proving to be a sign of alarm; she was terrified for your life, worrying Lucy who evidently had no clue as to what it was that you were currently doing.

“Oh, hey - sorry, I wasn’t expecting you round today,” Lucy began, and Margot would nod gravely, beginning to feel bad for not giving some sort of warning to her before her arrival, “is everything okay? You - You look stressed, and tired.”

“I - I’m fine, don’t worry about me,” she tried to reassure her hastily, desperate to get to you, “where’s Y/n?”

🜸

Whilst they were both hastily searching around for you, you were sunk down against the wall in the bathroom, tears endlessly streaming down your cheeks whilst you were still holding the now blood-stained razor in your right hand, and the now empty bottle of beer in your left one. You’d left a few cuts wherever you found you could, and tried to make them pretty deep, too, hoping that maybe you’d end up bleeding to death for all that you’d ended up doing to Margot, resulting in her being further worried about you, and upset to the point that she felt as if she had to try and get you to change the way that you had been recently by breaking up with you, and kicking you out despite her still somehow having feelings for you, hurting her even more.

You would be startled as soon as someone had begun to frantically knock on the bathroom door, but found you couldn’t strain out a response to it, your voice failing you, and words getting stuck within your throat beneath the lump that had formed whilst you were finding yourself trying not to cry again as a result of you thinking about your and Margot’s previous conversation over Lucy’s phone, until a familiar voice sounded out, soothing you instantly, and you even couldn’t help, but smile faintly upon hearing it.

“Y-Y/n, if - if that’s you in there, please - just-.. say something, and let us know that you’re okay,” Margot requested, though she was also finding it a struggle to speak, evidently on the verge of breaking down, and this was further heightened when she found she still couldn’t hear anything, terrifying her as a strained sob managed to escape her lips, prompting you to falter upon hearing it whilst your heart ached even more excruciatingly alongside her own.

“S-Shit, okay,” Lucy commented, “so she isn’t responding, but don’t worry, I - I have a key, and I’m gonna go and get it really quickly, just wait here-”

“Please h-hurry,” she pleaded, and Lucy would nod, before rushing out of the room whilst Margot returned her attention to the door, and leaned heavily against it, wishing she could get to you, as well as that she could turn back the time to stop herself from kicking you out of her house, and breaking up with you as she was sure, now, that she could have tried to help you using another method, and that she’d made the wrong decision, making you worse than you had been, before, but you believed you only had yourself to blame for it, and always would.

As soon as Lucy had returned, she would hastily unlock the door, panicking you, but you found you could no longer move properly; all the cuts you’d left almost all over your body were paining you too much to allow you to try and hide them, though it would be pointless to do so when they were leaving a range of blood stains both on your clothes, and on the floor - you had only been trying to hide them because you didn’t want Margot to have to see you like this; you didn’t think she would actually come and see you to make sure that you were okay, and wished she hadn’t had bothered, knowing that seeing you in this state would only hurt her even more.

Once they’d managed to get inside, they would both falter by the doorway, and you couldn’t bear to look up at them, especially not to see the pained expression currently residing on Margot’s face; she couldn’t believe what she was seeing, but at the same time cursed herself for not being as surprised as she thought she would be - she had caught you trying to take your life before, after all, but despite this fact she couldn’t help, but feel even worse as she didn’t like to think that this was simply a regular, and not uncommon occurrence for you both.

“You shouldn’t have bothered coming to see me,” you managed, your voice a little more raspy than usual, and barely audible; you couldn’t even believe - for a moment - that you had managed to speak after your gaze had briefly fallen upon her, before you had quickly lowered it down to your currently too pale hands.

Upon hearing your voice, Margot managed to drag herself out of her thoughts, allowing her to rush up to you, and crouch down in front of you whilst she tearfully examined the blood stains forming almost all over your garments, before she looked up again, allowing her stunning icy blue eyes to look with your’s, prompting another strained sob to manage to escape her lips whilst she lifted her right hand shakily up to your left cheek, prompting you to subconsciously lean into her touch whilst your own tears managed to escape, and heart ached even more somehow alongside her’s; you hated what you were doing to her, whilst she hated what she had done to you, though you hoped she wasn’t blaming herself for what had happened, feeling as if you had been the one to result in this happening, as well as everything else happening though everything else bad with the world didn’t directly involve, or centre around you.

“I couldn’t have just let this go on any longer than it already has,” she contradicted feebly, and you would shake your head gravely whilst she would briefly look back at Lucy who was already in the process of calling for an ambulance, before she looked back at you, “a-as soon as you ended the call i-it was like-.. like I knew, a-and-.. I had to see you; had to make sure that you were okay, b-because - because I still-”

“N-No, don’t,” you interjected weakly, prompting her to falter whilst a hurt look crossed her face, and her tears would begin to escape her eyes, making your heart sink as soon as you noticed them, “do you remember what I told you before? You deserve better than me; I’m not good enough for you - all I do is hurt you-”

“That’s not true,” she interrupted confidently, desperate to make you happy again, as well as to win you back so you could both do all that you had planned to do together ever since you’d admitted your feelings for one another, and started going out together a short time after you’d both graduated college, “Y/n, you - you’re perfect, a-and honestly all I could ever want; I could only ever choose you because you’re the only one who can make me feel the way I do, and sure we have our bad moments, but-.. what couple doesn’t? It’s not like we always have them.” You would scoff, and she would frown, evidently disappointed by your reaction as well as worried by it. “You know we don’t, a-and whenever we do you also know it’s because I’m worried about you; I can’t live without you, Y/n, and if you keep on doing stuff like - like this then I will be, and I’m not sure if I can do that; not sure if I can actually handle trying to live without you by my side-”

“You survived a week without me,” you reminded her, “you would be fine-”

“Really? ‘Cause I think I was barely surviving, and if I was happy do you think I’d be here not only to help you, and to try and make you happy again, but to try and start again with you, too, t-telling you about how my feelings for you never changed even after what happened last week?” She questioned, but you found you couldn’t answer, feeling much too weak, numb, and empty to, though even if you felt as if you could you wouldn’t be able to as she hastily continued, evidently desperate to prove to you that you were more than good enough for her, and that she still wanted you despite what had occurred between you both recently with your supposedly burdening drinking habits and suicidal tendencies. “A-Actually,” she began again thoughtfully whilst a soft smile would play on her lips, and you would tilt your head partially whilst you wondered what she was thinking about, and couldn’t help, but try and fight back a smile as seeing her smile - though she could only manage a faint smile during this moment - always tended to make you feel better, as if you’d never been in pain before, soothing you instantly whilst you found yourself subconsciously admiring her. “I think they did change - I don’t know how, but - my feelings for you only ever seem to grow stronger with every passing day, even when we aren’t together,” she expressed, and you would appear relieved for a moment as you had been worried - though you couldn’t imagine why when you believed, and knew you’d never stop believing that you were far from good enough for her - that maybe she had been about to tell you that she had changed her mind, and no longer wanted you anymore, something you knew would end up breaking you completely, and pushing you to go to further extremes to try and take your life. “S-So? Would-.. Would you maybe be up for-.. being my partner in crime again? As soon as you’re treated, a-and feel ready, of course,” she inquired hopefully, and you would frown whilst you thought about it after briefly appearing elated by her question, and she would begin to dread your answer as soon as your smile had dropped, suggesting to her that were considering turning her down, prompting her heart to sink alongside your’s whilst she found herself feeling empty and numb again like she had been the past few days away from you.

“Y-You know-.. sometimes I-.. wish we never met,” you admitted gravely, and Margot would falter, her demeanour sinking a little whilst she appeared crestfallen again for a moment, “if we hadn’t, you-.. you wouldn’t be wasting your time on me-”

“But that’s all that I want to do, Y/n - I want to waste my time on you; I always have, and I always will, I promise,” she insisted whilst she carefully cradled you close to her, and you would wonder why she was being so good to you after all that had happened between you both recently, subconsciously wishing you could wrap your arms around her, whilst finding you couldn’t; it was too excruciating to move any part of your body right now apart from your neck; you hadn’t left any cuts on it, and nor had you found yourself brave enough to leave any cuts upon your face. “Y-You’re my soulmate-”

“Help is coming!” Lucy exclaimed, and you would grimace, before shaking your head hastily, and glaring up at her.

“I don’t need help,” you retorted, and Lucy would wince whilst Margot would smile apologetically up at her, before returning her attention to you, and trying to provide comfort to you by playing with your hair using her right hand, soothing you instantly whilst you subconsciously leaned into her touch, “it’s like no one understands me, w-well-.. no one but-.. you, Mar - I just-.. need an end to - to this pain; I can’t stand it anymore, but-.. I loved you-..” She would falter again upon hearing you use the word ‘loved’ as if you no longer felt the same way for her, when really you were just trying to dissuade her from you, knowing you could never make her happy again; could never be who you longed to be for her, though you despised yourself for what you were doing, and longed to stop whilst you tried not to allow your gaze to drift down to her lips, instead allowing your eyes to lock with her stunning icy blue ones so you could get easily lost within them, before forcing yourself to continue feebly whilst you drifted in and out of consciousness, terrifying her; she couldn’t imagine her life without you in it, and had never thought that maybe she would end up having to try to go on living with you completely no longer by her side, or even alive anymore, prompting more tears to begin running down her cheeks whilst you longed to brush and kiss them away to try and soothe her. “I loved you so, so much, but you hurt me, Mar - I deserved it, though; I’ll always deserve this pain-”

“N-No, Y/n, you don’t deserve it,” she interjected, “and I never meant to hurt you, I swear, I just-”

“I know,” you reassured her faintly whilst you managed a weak smile up at her, “you-.. you were trying to help me, and I appreciate everything that you have tried to do for me, I just-.. wish you’d stop, a-and find someone better for you who won’t constantly burden you like I do-”

“But you don’t burden me,” she contradicted, “I love you - you-.. you’re everything to me; you always have been, and always will be, n-no matter what, and I’ll always do all I can for you because I want you to be happy, and want to repay you to the best of my ability with my love for you, f-for honestly making me so much happier than I’ve ever been before.”

“You’re wasting your time,” you continued, your voice barely audible whilst she leaned closer to you, and would affectionately connect her forehead to your’s, flustering you, “I - I’m never gonna change my mind, Mar, I promise - please just find someone else; d-don’t let me hurt you anymore-”

“You won’t,” she insisted, her voice briefly trembling whilst she did, “I trust you, Y/n - m-more than anything; you’ve never hurt me, and I hate myself for hurting you like I did last week, but-.. I guess if-.. if you really don’t want me anymore I-.. I’ll stop, and give you time to think about things.”

You would nod slowly, before forcing a smile up at her though seeing her in pain again was hurting you more than anything else ever had, before, especially when you still had feelings for her, and knew you always would.

“I’m glad, but-.. don’t wait up for me, okay? I’m not-” You would catch yourself, knowing it would hurt her even more to hear you say that you believed yourself to not be worth the wait. “Like I said before, I’m-.. I’m not changing my mind,” you strained out whilst you began to grow weaker, and more disorientated whilst you leaned heavily against her, and would rest your head upon her left shoulder, your eyelids beginning to flutter shut, before everything seemed to go dark around you, and you fell unconscious within her embrace, panicking both her and your sister even further until the ambulance had finally arrived, and could take you to the hospital where they would stay the night anxiously waiting for you to reawaken after you had been treated.

🜚

Whilst they were both waiting, Lucy couldn’t help, but notice how crestfallen Margot appeared after your and her previous interaction, prompting her to frown; she could tell that you claiming that you wouldn’t change your mind about giving you both another chance had deeply affected her, only to be heightened by the fact that you were now being treated whilst they were sitting within this quiet lobby waiting to be told that you were going to be okay, and would soon wake up.

“You really love her, don’t you?” Lucy mused, and Margot wouldn’t hesitate to nod whilst staring down at her currently trembling hands, feeling unable to meet Lucy’s gaze without breaking down whilst tears were already threatening to escape her stunning icy blue eyes. “You know she doesn’t mean it, right? She still loves you, and always will,” she continued, and Margot would shake her head gravely whilst appearing doubtful, prompting Lucy to try and think of something that she could do to try and get you both back together, “she does, I mean - there’s not been a single day that she hasn’t asked me about you, and hasn’t stopped watching that film you both were in; I can’t remember what it’s called, but-.. she watches it everyday, missing you.”

Margot would appear surprised, before glancing up at Lucy whilst she recalled the films you had both worked on together following each of the Suicide Squads including the one that was a precursor before the first film - so far, those (not including the original ones which you found you couldn’t be in) were all you had done, and she had had to help you get the part.

“I think you should keep trying to win her back; don’t give up, especially not whilst you still feel the same way for her, and are confident that she’s your soulmate - are you?” Lucy inquired, and Margot wouldn’t hesitate to nod hastily again whilst her eyes would subconsciously begin to glint, prompting Lucy to smile warmly over at her, glad that you had her; a true friend to get you through the bitter times with her father whilst she herself was away, unable to take his wrath anymore alongside you.

“I - I’ve never been more certain of anything else,” Margot expressed, and Lucy would raise her eyebrows, wondering how that felt, exactly, as she’d never really been lucky herself when it came to relationships, and love, “but you heard her, Luce - she’s determined to not change her mind because she wants to protect me from her, for some reason, so what do I do? When she’s set on trying to protect me, she’ll never stop, and I know that for a fact now.”

Lucy would then smirk upon stumbling across an idea that they could both try and execute, before she looked over at Margot again who would tilt her head subconsciously, wondering what it was that Lucy had managed to think up whilst she also appeared hopeful, knowing that if she lost you again that she would begin to struggle - herself - even more, to go on without you; one week away from you had been more excruciating than she had thought it would, so what would it feel like to not have you by her side for the rest of her life, and maybe even beyond it?

“I have the best idea,” Lucy chimed, “you see - it’s easy to make Y/n jealous, and when she gets jealous it’s likely that she will confront you, giving you the chance to admit your feelings to her again, and she’ll be so riled up and anxious about losing you to the point that she’ll have to give in to you, and win you back - how does that sound?”

“Like a pretty good idea,” Margot answered, “I guess I’m just worried, t-though - I don’t wanna hurt her again.”

“And you won’t,” Lucy tried to reassure her hastily, evidently eager to see you both together again as she liked to see you happy like you were whenever you and Margot were together, “I promise - we’ll call the plan off sooner if she gets worryingly upset, okay? J-Just to make sure that she’s okay, and trust me - she’ll be more than okay by the time it’s over, when you’ll both be happy together again. So - are you in?”

Margot would think about it for a moment, before reluctantly nodding, and smiling faintly back over at her.

“Sure,” she replied simply, “so how are we making her jealous, and when can we start?”

As soon as you’d awoken, and they had fully discussed Lucy’s plan together, they would both be guided to your room, and would awkwardly sit on either side of you whilst you slowly would stir awake, disorientated for a little while whilst you found yourself trying not to panic, waking up within this overwhelmingly bright room.

“W-Where am I-?” You asked, before trying to get up, and wincing whilst your previously stitched up and bandaged cuts began to pain you again, leaving you feeling weak, and numb like they had, before.

“It’s okay, Y/n,” Margot cooed, “you’re safe, now - you’re in the hospital, and are gonna get better for us soon, I promise.”

You would then realise, a pained expression on your face whilst you gravely shook your head, prompting a hurt look to cross her face; she could guess what you might be intending on saying, making her heart sink and begin to ache excruciatingly alongside your’s again.

“Why?” You began weakly, before continuing in a strained manner. “Why’d you have to save me like that? Why would you even bother? I don’t deserve this; I don’t deserve anyone, or anything - you should have left me to die-”

“We couldn’t do something like that to you,” Lucy contradicted, a hurt look on her face whilst you did, and you would subconsciously grimace up at her.

“Funny hearing you say that after you basically left me to be beaten by - by him,” you retorted, evidently referring to your father, prompting her to falter whilst she recalled how she had fled from his wrath, leaving you behind, “you could have taken me away with you-”

“I know, I’m sorry, I just - I panicked after mum died, a-and-”

“Just go,” you uttered whilst you stared ahead of you, and Margot would bow her head, a pained expression on her face as she hated that things were like this between you both, though she could understand why you still might not be on the best of terms with Lucy after what had happened, even after she’d apologised profusely and made more of an effort to take care of, and keep an eye on you recently to make sure that you were okay, as well as to make up for her previous absence whilst you were living with your abusive father.

“Hey,” she cooed gently whilst she smiled softly up at you to try and provide comfort to you whilst she carefully held your partially bandaged up right hand in her left one, soothing you instantly whilst Lucy begrudgingly got up out of her seat, and dragged herself back toward the door, “Luce-”

“I’ll be outside if you guys need me, okay?” She interjected barely audibly, before leaving the room, and sitting outside whilst she began to cry quietly, burying her face into her hands; she wished she could take back the time, and decide - instead - to stay with you to protect you from your and her father as she hated that things were now like this between you both; hated that she had left you to be abused by him with no intention of returning until he had gone from both of your lives.

“Are you okay?” Margot inquired, and you would hesitate, before nodding gravely, and forcing a smile over at her whilst she appeared to be nervous as if she were about to make a suggestion that you wouldn’t immediately agree with, and you would instantly guess that it had something to do with your sister. “G-Good - I’m glad,” she expressed, “h-hey, erm-.. I just thought maybe it would be good if you spoke to your sister a bit more, spent some more time with her; she cares about you, and regrets leaving, she told me; she wants to do all she can to try and make it up to you-”

“Well she can’t,” you insisted, evidently disappointing her, and you would wonder why, even finding yourself growing to be quite anxious, and even experienced a slight pang of jealousy whilst you thought back to how they had been much closer than they had been before, recently, “w-when did she become your best friend, anyway? You - You were never really that close, before, n-not that it matters, I just-.. never mind.”

“What are you talking about? We’ve been friends for a little while, now,” she contradicted, whilst trying to fight back a smirk; she could tell that you were already getting jealous, suggesting that the plan Lucy had come up with was already working somewhat, “besides - y-you know that you’re my best friend, don’t you? You always have been, a-and always will be, I promise.”

You would nod gravely though her referring to you as her ‘best friend’ was paining you, and the pain was getting hard to bear again.

“Y-You’ll always be my best friend, too,” you returned, and she would then find herself experiencing the same unexpected pang of sadness that you previously had, prompting her to falter subconsciously, before she forced a smile over at you, and would begrudgingly turn around once the door had opened again - Lucy had returned, and you would subconsciously grimace, whilst also finding yourself growing to be anxious again whilst you watched her approach, and rest her left hand on Margot’s right shoulder, prompting her to smile up at Lucy whilst you would begin to feel lost, and empty again, as if you had nothing left within you anymore.

Once you felt able, you would force your gaze away though it was paining you to make even the smallest of movements, now, for a reason unbeknownst to you, and Lucy would nod subtly after you’d looked away, suggesting further to them both that the plan was going the way they had been intending it to go.

“That doctor came up to me again and told me we should let Y/n rest, now,” she informed, and Margot would instantly frown before she glanced over at you subconsciously; she didn’t want to have to leave you whilst you were like this, worried about you again, and about what you might manage to do to yourself if you were left alone, “we could always come back later? I’m sure they’d let us-”

“Don’t bother,” you strained out, your voice close to a whisper whilst you stared ahead of you, and tears clouded your vision again, surprising them both, as well as making Margot feel worse for what she was doing, for a moment, when she noticed the hurt look on your face, “I’m fine here, by myself - it’s nice. Besides, you - you guys have lives to live, too, you shouldn’t be wasting your’s on-.. on mine.”

“And what’s wrong with your’s?” She asked, and you would appear taken aback by the question, before painfully glancing up at her.

“It - It’s nothing,” you gave in whilst you looked away again, and would hesitantly force yourself to let go of her hand though you longed to remain in contact with her like you previously had been, the loss of it making you feel even worse, somehow, “just-.. don’t worry about me anymore, Mar, okay?”

“But-”

“Please,” you begged, and she would fall quiet whilst a hurt look crossed her face again; she couldn’t bear to see you like this, and hoped the plan would work out the way Lucy had told her it would so she could try and make you happy again, and shower you with all the love she would always hold for you like she’d been dreaming of doing recently after she’d ended up briefly losing you for a whole week.

“I’m sorry, Y/n, I can’t,” she continued dejectedly, before forcing herself up, “l-look, we-.. we’re gonna have to go for a bit, but-”

“O-Of course - go and have fun,” you remarked sarcastically, “b-by all means - I bet you just love each other’s company.”

“I don’t know why you’re being like this,” Margot responded, “s-so-.. we’ll go, a-and come back later, okay? Get some rest, I-..” She would then wince, hastily stopping herself before the last two words could slip from her lips though she longed to release them, and to try and make you happy again like you had been, before you’d lost her. “You need it,” she managed after clearing her throat, before she dragged herself from the room followed by Lucy after you’d found you couldn’t respond again - the pain was too excruciating, and once they’d gone, you couldn’t help, but break down, and begin to sob uncontrollably whilst Margot would stop at the door upon hearing that you had begun to cry, a strained sob threatening to escape her own lips whilst she listened to you. “Y/n-”

“No, Margot, don’t,” Lucy interrupted, before managing to stop her from re-entering the room though she longed to go back inside, and to hold you close to her in an attempt to try and provide comfort to you, “it’s too early - if you talk to her, now, it won’t work.”

“Listen to her, Luce,” she whined, “she needs me, and I need her-”

“I know, but it’s gonna work out by the time it’s over, I promise,” Lucy insisted, “she’ll realise something is off if we go back inside, now, I know she will - do you want to lose her again?”

Margot’s expression would then soften, before she would nod hastily, and sniffle quietly whilst she tried to wipe away all of the tears that had managed to escape her stunning icy blue eyes.

“N-No - of course not, just-.. please - promise me that things are gonna get better, soon,” she requested, and Lucy would nod, before smiling reassuringly over at her to try and make her feel better, but she found nothing, but you, could comfort her right now, and you currently weren’t an option, making her feel worse, and as if things were only going to go downhill from this moment, “that this time she’s still here; will always be here, and never disappear again, c-can you do that?”

“Of course I can - Here: everything’s gonna be perfect again once we’ve executed the plan, and you’re never gonna end up losing her again, I promise,” she replied, and Margot would express relief whilst she thought about it again, before nodding, and forcing a smile back at Lucy though to hear that you were still crying was paining her more than anything else ever had before, somehow, “now - before we come back and check on her, what would you like to eat?”

🜸🜚🜸

As soon as you had been discharged from the hospital, Margot and Lucy would make sure to keep a close eye on you, worried about you possibly trying to take your own life again, somehow, and you hated it; hated being watched the way that you were, especially by Lucy after she had left you to experience the full wrath of your father in the form of the beatings he had administered to you on a daily basis. You also couldn’t stand to see them both getting so much closer than they were, before, worrying you, though you couldn’t imagine why, especially when you had been hoping - in the first place - that Margot would find someone better than you, a thought that always prompted you to break down quietly into your hands whenever you were curled up in bed as you didn’t want to end up crying in front of her, resulting in you upsetting or worrying her even more than she was, before, somehow.

However - though you found yourself somehow barely strong enough to do this before, you would soon begin to lose that strength following you overhearing Margot and Lucy talking about meeting up on a date together, leaving you feeling empty and numb again whilst your heart would ache excruciatingly, before you nodded gravely, and dragged yourself into the room, surprising them both - well, you thought you had surprised them, when really they’d known that you were there, and that was why Lucy had brought up the next topic of the plan; it would soon be coming to an end now the main idea of it had been brought into play.

“Y/n,” Margot began whilst she smiled warmly up at you, before getting up off of the sofa and making to wrap her arms around you, “you’re finally awake-”

You would then move away before she could get any closer, prompting her to falter whilst a hurt look would cross her face, only making you feel worse as you hated upsetting her, bowing your head to try and avoid making eye contact as you were on the verge of breaking down again, and knew you wouldn’t be able to hold yourself back from crying if you met her now tearful as well as anxious gaze.

“C-Can we talk, Mar?” You requested, and she would hesitantly glance back at Lucy, appearing nervous, and Lucy would simply nod, smile reassuringly, before leaving the room to give you both some privacy.

“Sure - What’s up?” She inquired, trying to hide that your reaction to her trying to hug you had pained her, and you would subconsciously grimace whilst you thought about their previous conversation, prompting your heart to sink again whilst a couple of small tears would manage to escape your eyes, before slowly running down your cheeks, worrying her as she’d not expected this reaction from you. “Hey, are - are you crying-? Y/n-”

You would then step back again once she had made to inch closer to you subconsciously; she couldn’t bear this - seeing you upset, and not being able to provide comfort to you - it was painful.

“W-What even am I in your life, Mar?” You questioned, your voice briefly trembling whilst you began to break down, unable to hold it back anymore, prompting her to falter whilst her own tears had begun to manage to escape her, but before she could muster up an answer, you would continue shakily, and in a strained manner as if you were weak, and hanging on a loose thread. “Because as of lately I feel as though I’ve been - been nothing to you,” you admitted dejectedly, prompting her to frown whilst her heart would sink, and ache excruciatingly alongside your’s, “so-.. w-what am I to you, now?”

She would then find herself wishing she could tell you the truth, whilst Lucy was shaking her head in the doorway; she had been quietly listening in like you had a moment ago to their previous conversation.

“Y/n, you - you know what you mean to me-”

You would grimace, before nodding gravely, and bowing your head whilst you tried to swallow the lump in your throat which had formed following you beginning to cry in front of her.

“R-Right, yeah, sorry - I forgot I was just your supposed best friend, now,” you recalled, “I’ll just-.. go and get Lucy back for you-”

“N-No, Y/n, wait,” she interjected hastily, her voice briefly trembling whilst she did, and you would hesitantly stop, before looking back at her, and lingering by the door whilst Lucy was trying to hide from your view, “I don’t want her back, okay? I want you - I always have-”

“You don’t need to lie to me anymore,” you reminded her dejectedly, “just-.. focus on you and Lucy, okay?”

“But-” You would then slip through the door, and rush back up the stairs whilst you began to break down all over again, and would disappear into your quite plain room; your sister had made sure to - with Margot’s help - set up the other spare room for you, making it so that it was relatively bland as she didn’t want anything within it that you could use to try and hurt yourself, making sure - even - to apply soft material on the walls and the wooden boards on your bed as she didn’t trust you not to try and use them on yourself as she recalled you had often done it before until you’d knocked yourself out every time, and she had had to take you to the hospital.

Lucy would then - once you had fled from the room, and disappeared upstairs - hesitantly re-enter, though she had heard that Margot had begun to break down alongside you.

“I did warn you that it would be too soon to try,” Lucy reminded her, and she would nod gravely whilst she tried to rid herself of her tears, “look-.. she’s gonna come around, soon, I promise, and you’ll be able to win her back as soon as she does, I’m sure of it - I know what she’s like; she starts off often being in a strop, engaging in sarcasm, and then tries to feign acceptance - that’s when you’ll be able to tell her you still love her because by that time she won’t be able to refuse or run away from you again, okay?”

Margot would hesitate, before nodding gravely in response though this all felt wrong to her, and made her feel as if what she was doing was wrong, and would only make things worse, especially when she could see that she was already upsetting you more than she thought she would, before, and she couldn’t stand watching it happen.

“I guess,” she managed, “this just feels so-.. wrong.. w-we shouldn’t be doing this to her-”

“Stop worrying, it’s all going to work out, I know it will,” Lucy insisted, “but, sure - if you decide you want to stop, then we can stop tomorrow, just think about it before you do, okay?”

“I - I will,” Margot answered, and Lucy would smile reassuringly back at her again, before she sat back down on the sofa, “you can continue watching the film, if you want - I’m really tired, and think I’m just gonna try and get some sleep, now.”

“Sure - have a good sleep, okay? Things will get better tomorrow,” she responded gently, and Margot would nod, before forcing a smile back at her, “night.”

“Night,” she returned, before leaving the room, dragging herself up the stairs, and stopping by the door of her bedroom whilst she looked toward your own, wondering if she should try and talk to you again until she would remind herself of what Lucy had told her about your stages, and begrudgingly decided against it, drawing in a shaky breath, before she disappeared inside.

~~~~~

Hope you enjoyed it! ❤️

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promptspa · 2 years

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Random prompt #77 TW: implied injury

"I've heard those same useless words countless times... What makes you think yours are any different?" Superhero questioned, feet still dangling over the edge of the building they sat on. "Because I love you, damn it!" Villain's outburst caught the hero off guard, their head turning to look at the criminal. Tears slid down their face, multiple emotions swirling in their usually challenging and suave gaze. Anger, sadness, grief, love. Superhero felt guilt building in the pit of their stomach, even before Villain continued. "I don't care that you're immortal or whatever! Seeing you like this hurts me, a lot more than I want to admit," Villain paused, moving to wipe at their eyes aggressively for a moment. "I told myself I wouldn't let myself get attached! But you, sitting there practically drenched in your own blood, hurts." Superhero opened their mouth, but words merely died on their tongue. What were they supposed to say? How were they supposed to comfort Villain? "Please... Just, come back to my base with me. Let me help you for once."

#prompts #dialogue prompts #page's prompts #prompt list #fanfiction prompts #action prompts #hero x villain #otp prompts #angsty prompts #potential hurt/comfort #angst prompts #tw implied injury #romance prompts #superhero x villain #villain x superhero #immortal superhero #hurt/comfort prompts #confession prompts

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sydns · 2 years

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Monderi but it's just them dying together

(Bonus if Monspeet just says "fuck it" and teels Derieri how he feels, activating his commandment on him. EVEN MORE BONUS if Derieri calls him a idiot for doing that and says that she loves him too before dying right by his side.)

#nnt #7ds #sds #nanatsu no taizai #7 deadly sins #seven deadly sins #nnt manga #nnt anime #angsty fluff #monspeet #derieri #monderi #prompts #dying inside #Monspeet is only willing to die as long as he's with Derieri #i'm just pulling stuff out of my ass at this point to post #dying confessions #if had the power to draw this i would

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primofate · 11 months

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Confessions Series - Part 1: Overheard [Genshin Impact Male Characters]

Note: Welp I had the itch to write again so here I am. Though sleep deprived because baby keeps waking up every 3 hours to feed... I wanted to do this haha. Based on @soulprompts “I love you” prompts. What other character should I do?

Warnings: haven’t written in a while please excuse and tell me about pronoun slips, I’m sleep deprived, not proofread, some are just concepts of liking someone, having a crush on them, while some are full blown love confessions. SOME ARE ANGSTY, chose only the male characters I wanted to write for instead of forcing myself to do all of them.

Characters: Aether, Albedo, Alhaitham, Ayato, Cyno, Dainsleif, Diluc, Itto, Kaeya, Scaramouche, Xiao, gn!reader

Other works in this series: (Part 2 - Description)

Scenario: Talking to a friend about how you feel about him. Unbeknownst to you, he was listening, hidden round the corner. What does he do?

Aether

“He’s sweet,” You simply answer when asked what you like about Aether. “I mean, he’s a simple guy. He’s not a mystery, it’s not hard to read him nor to get along with him. I guess that’s one of the reasons why a lot of people like him.”

“Uhuh,” your friend drawls, their head lazily resting on their hand. “but you don’t just like Aether. You seriously LIKE him,”

You’re rendered speechless by the statement for a second, tripping over your first words, “Well--I mean--” and as if realizing you’re making a fool of yourself by speaking in garbles, you recover. “Yeah, I guess...” You don’t know why you admit to it, but it’s not like your friend didn’t already know.

What he does:

Is tempted to immediately walk up to you and reconfirm the conversation.

Stops himself for a minute and replays the whole conversation in his head, probably once, twice and maybe a third time.

Second guesses himself, but when he finally goes through all possible options, he realizes there’s no mistaking the overheard confession.

All the while, Paimon is nagging him to go talk to you. “You didn’t hear wrong! Stop thinking too much, hurry and go!” Ends up being pushed out into the open by his flying companion.

“Erm...Ahem” he coughs into his fist. “I...didn’t mean to eavesdrop...Y/N, sorry, but... can we continue this conversation somewhere else? Somewhere...a little more private?” and the shy smile he gives you is a tell tale sign that he had most likely felt the same.

Albedo

“His schedule is always busy. He has his hands full with Klee, on top of all the work he needs to do,” was your excuse to your friend when asked why you haven’t confessed to the alchemist yet. “I don’t think Albedo has time for this type of thing, you know? He doesn’t need a distraction.”

What he does:

His logical side agrees that he doesn’t need a distraction.

But the other part of him doesn’t mind if its you.

Pauses for a moment, thinks about it for a second, before confronting you about it just minutes later.

“...Schedules can be made flexible, Y/N,” you jump at his sudden voice. “Just as distractions...can sometimes be a good thing,” Albedo stretches a hand out to you. “...Care to test how good of one you can be to me?”

Alhaitham

“Y/N, Alhaitham is FAR from stupid. There’s no way he hasn’t figured out that you have a crush on him,”

“Shush!!” You swerve around to your friend, ducking a little, as if that would help you become invisible. “People could be listening, besides, if that’s true, then it’s even worse. It means that he knows, and probably has no interest in me, so let’s just forget about it, ok?”

What he does:

..................................No he doesn’t know. Sure he’s smart but............he could be dense when it came to these things. That, or he just didn’t know what to do.

Does not confront you about it immediately. In fact he turns around and walks away without being spotted, opting to think about his next steps instead of just rushing into the conversation.

Lo and behold a few days later he’ll show up in front of you with his usual stoic expression.

“Y/N,” he starts, and you freeze on the spot, looking up at him, blinking.

“Y-Yes?” You haven’t seen nor heard from him in days and as usual, you attributed it to him being busy. Little did you know that he had been mulling over how to talk to you.

“I heard your conversation with (your friend) the other day,” straightforward was his answer to everything, even in this particular situation.

It takes you a few seconds to internalize his words. You’re not even sure which conversation he means. You talk to (your friend) a lot. Your brows start to furrow in confusion, until he clarifies.

“...I wouldn’t say that I completely have no interest in you,” he starts, and your shoulders tense up, now realizing which conversation it was. You could feel your cheeks start to burn, all you wanted to do was run away.

Alhaitham holds back a sigh, “...Anyway, here is no place to talk about this... I’ll meet you at Puspa Cafe tonight, if you’re free,”

You’re FAR from stupid too, and knew exactly what he was trying to do.

Ayato

“Besides why would the Lord Commissioner even look at someone like me?” you hiss at your friend who was trying to persuade you that Ayato also had the hots for you. It just seemed a little delusional to you.

“He takes the chance to rile you up every time he sees you. He’s obviously doing it on purpose,” your friend counters. You roll your eyes up to high heaven.

“He does that to everyone...” you conclude, knowing that Ayato had the habit of--though you don’t know if intentionally--giving his servants a scare.

“Alright, alright, you don’t have to be so jealous,” your friend quips back, you send them a quick glare before going back to doing your own work.

What he does:

Doesn’t even bat an eye. Smirks as he hears the whole story.

Confidently reveals his presence to the two of you, chuckling.

“Jealousy doesn’t usually paint a beautiful colour,” he starts, the overly pleasant smile on his face. You straighten up immediately, eyes changing into saucers when you realize he had heard the whole thing. You open your mouth to explain, but he beats you to it.

“But I must say it looks a little different on you, Y/N, almost charming,” The side of his lip quirks up the slightest bit into a subtle grin. You bite your lip, there he is again trying to rile you up, maybe (your friend) was right.

“...Is there anything I can do for you Lord Commissioner?” you ask, trying to stray away from the subject. He only chuckles.

“You’ll find that there are a LOT of things you can do for me, Y/N. Start by accompanying me to tea, hm?” He wasn’t really asking, it was almost a command.

You wished your friend snickering on the side would just shut up.

Cyno

“...He’s a little intimidating don’t you think? I don’t know why you like him so much,” your friend comments, slacking off on their pile of paperwork. You roll your eyes at them.

“Maybe because he works hard, unlike other people,” you shake your head a little.

“As General Mahamatra he’s supposed to work hard. Just admit that you have weird tastes.” your friend counters, still procrastinating on their share of work.

“Okay, so what if he’s a little vicious in his ways? He’s just doing his job. Now, it would help me if you started doing yours as well,”

What he does:

Doesn’t know what to do.

Stands hidden for quite a long time. The subject has already moved on and away from him.

Torn between revealing himself now or later.

Can’t think properly so exits from the situation and comes back later that same day, when you’re still working with your friend.

As he approaches your table, your friend notices him first. (Your friend) nudges you with their elbow, tilting their chin up to let you know that someone was approaching.

You pick your head up, and feel yourself go rigid when you see that it’s Cyno. At first you think to yourself that he might not be here to talk to you, maybe he’s just about to walk by...but he stops in front of your table and you’re left to wordlessly look up at him.

There’s a moment of silence that seemed to stretch on forever.

“...I value the high praise that you give me,” he starts and you immediately want to duck under the table and hide.

He heard.

“O-Oh, G-General Mahamatra, you heard that...It’s...nothing, hard work deserves to be praised...” you avert your gaze down to the papers you were working on, pretending to continue and be busy with them.

There was an awkward pause, your eyes darting up towards him for a second, checking if he was still looking at you, before breaking away again and furiously flipping through papers.

“...Do you want to play some TCG?”

“Huh?” You end up with an incredulous look on your face, trying to gauge if he was serious. His face is still blank, but the usual tenseness in the way he carried himself gave way for a barely seen relaxation. It was hard to spot, but it was there.

You ended up sighing a little in what you could only describe as relief, giving him a lopsided smile. “Sure, but go easy on me, I haven’t played in a while,”

“That’s fine. Perhaps a daily practice session will do you good,”

Dainsleif

“Mysterious, aloof, disappears into thin air... A man like that? You probably should stay away, Y/N. You don’t know what he dabbles in,” (Your friend) warns, looking at you with genuine concern.

“Perhaps he has some secrets...but I don’t think he’s a bad guy at all. I’ve spent some time conversing with Dainsleif here and there,” you continue to wipe the tables, not noticing that the man you were talking about had long entered the tavern already and was now standing behind the two of you.

“At least he’s handsome, there’s that,” (Your friend) adds.

“Sure, but that’s not the only reason I like him,” you laugh.

What he does:

Wonders if he heard the conversation right and overanalyzes what you mean by “like” him.

Either way it stirs a strange emotion in him, one that he hadn’t felt in a long, long time.

Prefers to get things over with and thinks there’s no harm in confronting you immediately.

You hear someone clear their throat behind you. Thinking that it was a customer you turn around with a pleasant smile, only for it to slowly dwindle down into a shocked expression.

Dainsleif.

“Y/N,” he nods his head towards you casually. You gulp, force a smile, and nod back. “Hi, you’re early today,” just as your friend slips away from the conversation. Dainsleif doesn’t even spare them a glance.

He doesn’t have much to say about your comment of him being early. He doesn’t particularly know why he was early today either. Perhaps...fate would have him hear the conversation between you and (Your friend).

“Yes, well, it looks like there were benefits to being early today,” he meets you eye to eye, the intensity in his gaze almost makes you blush from your neck all the way up to the top of your head, but you fought the giddiness back.

“...What can I get you?” there’s a shiver that threatens to run up your spine, wondering if your deflection was successful. Dainsleif closes his eyes momentarily, before opening them with a strange sense of courage.

“Your company,”

Diluc

“It’s been years,” (Your friend) says, the two of you looking up at the massive oak tree of Windrise. They glance at you from the side of their eye before continuing. “Are you still in love with Diluc?”

There’s a breeze that passes, almost melancholic, and partly whispered of sorrow. “...I don’t think I’ll ever stop loving him.” You pick your hand up to rub at your arm. “Jean, Kaeya, Diluc and I...So many things have changed since we were kids...but I don’t think that spot for Diluc will ever go away,”

“Does he know, at least?” (Your friend) asks and you half scoff.

“I’m not sure, I get the feeling he does, but doesn’t act on it. Which is why...maybe the only way to solve this emptiness is to leave Mondstadt altogether.”

“Out of sight, out of mind huh?” (Your friend) claps your back, and turns around to start walking away with you.

What he does:

Internally a mess of emotions. Doesn’t know where to start.

but he’s just standing there and he’s stuck watching (your friend) and you turn around to come face to face with him.

He looks at you, a wave of memories and emotions flashing through his mind all at once, it almost overwhelms him.

“D-Diluc,” you stutter, heart freezing in your chest. You see him take a steadying breath in, prying his gaze away from you and over to (Your friend).

“(Your friend), could you give us a minute?” he asks. (Your friend) obliges, passing you a quick glance before going ahead on their own. Another breeze runs by, ruffling his long red hair.

“...I didn’t mean for you to hear that,” you start, and yet he doesn’t say anything, prompting you to continue talking. “...You don’t have to think about it too much, it’s just silly--”

“I wasn’t sure,” he cuts you off, eyes drawn to the ground now. “I wasn’t sure...if you really felt that way.”

The statement somehow exasperates you. “You weren’t sure? All those times I stayed by your side when everyone else left--” then it hits you. “Or were you scared, Diluc?”

The quick grimace in his expression tells you the answer. His reply comes a few seconds later, “I was, I still am,” but he picks his head up, and finally looks you straight in the eye. “...but this time...” his fists clench on his side. “This time give me the chance to show you how much I really care about you,”

He was not going to lose you too.

Itto

“Seriously?! Itto? Arataki Itto? Are you for real?” (Your friend) announces to nearly half of the food stall, the other customers swerving around to look at the two of you.

"Oh, say it a bit louder why don’t you?” You roll your eyes at your friend and continue eating.”

“Sorry. I just--Out of all the people you could choose, your huge crush is on that big brute??” your can tell by the look on your friend’s face that they think you have weird tastes.

What he does:

Butts in without even thinking of the conversation. Has no clue what’s going on.

“Crush?!”

You and your friend startle, swerving around to see none other than the oni with his hands on his hips. “Y/N?! You planning on crushing me?!” then he guffaws with laughter, slapping his knees in the process. “Yeah right, you’re no match for me!”

Your previously gaped open mouth slowly closes and your shoulders relax, sighing. You’re a little disappointed he doesn’t get it at all. Your friend shakes their head with a long sigh. “You stupid oaf, we don’t mean it that way...”

Itto’s head tilts sideways, a genuinely confused look on his face. “No? Then... Watcha all talkin about?”

You grab your friend’s arm and pull them forward the slightest bit. “It’s not important! Actually, we better get going--”

“Y/N has a CRUSH on you, idiot! Y/N LIKES you!” Your friend explodes, patience long gone.

Itto blinks at the confession, his eyes darts towards you, “...Oh,” then there’s the slight tugging at his chest, he can’t help but beam and smile silly. “Yeah? You’re not too bad yourself Y/N! I like you too!”

You’re not sure if he really understood the confession in its entirety.

Kaeya

“It’s all just fun and games with Kaeya. It doesn’t mean anything,” you laugh sheepishly, yet you rub the back of your neck a little.

“...Do you want it to be just fun and games?” your friend chides, and there’s a moment of silence. The two of you just sitting there already knowing the answer, it’s almost uncomfortable, until your friend sighs.

“...Let’s change the subject,”

What he does:

responds immediately. Will not wait a second longer to come out of his hiding place and ask about what he just heard.

“How about let’s not?” Kaeya emerges out of nowhere, slipping into the seat next to you at the cafe. His poise is confident and instantly his head lazily places itself into the palm of his hand, gaze lingering at you.

“Snowflake, I had no idea you felt like that,” his voice is smooth like ice and you bite your lip to keep yourself from saying something stupid.

“...I didn’t say anything though?” you countered, trying to evade the conversation. Your friend watches on with interest.

“Silence speaks volumes, Y/N,” Kaeya scoots even closer to you, your shoulders touching each other. However, he maneuvers his arm around to lay on the seat behind you. “So if you’re opposed to what I’m about to do, better speak up,”

He leans closer, inch by inch, he waits for you to say something.

You stay silent.

He grins.

Scaramouche

“Hat guy? He’s brutal. But who am I to comment on your tastes, Y/N. You’ve always been weird,” (Your friend) chides, watching as you go over the bookshelf again.

“Stop calling him that,” You murmur under your breath, more focused on finding the right book for your research. “That’s not his only distinctive feature, you know,” you continue, still engrossed in looking for a book.

“Oh? What else are his “distinctive features”?” (Your friend) drawls, rolling their eyes.

You hum a little, then plop on the ground cross-legged, wanting to get a better look on the last row of books of the Akademiya’s library. “...His eyes,” you simply answer. “They’re a beautiful shade of violet-blue...He’s always glaring at someone half of the time but he actually has very pretty eyes,”

There’s silence and you finally get the peace you need to concentrate. However, that silence is broken by a voice that you know all too well.

What he does:

is amused.

thinks its cute pathetic.

will still look angry but will have a hard time actually being angry.

will be cocky.

“My eyes, huh?”

It’s hard to completely turn around in your sitting position, so you do the best you can to turn, side eye landing on Scaramouche’s form. He has his arms crossed as usual, but there’s a smug smirk on his face. “Didn’t know it was that fascinating to you, bookeater,”

It was supposed to be an insulting nickname for you, who always had your nose in a book, but you took no offense to it at all.

You didn’t know what to say, so you continued staring at him. He being the anti-social person that he was, just stared back. There was a big gap of silence before he felt that it was becoming too awkward.

“...What’re you looking for?” he blurted out.

“...A book...”

“Are you stupid? Of course you’re looking for a book. I meant what’s the title?” There his usual sneer was back again and he unfolded his arms to look at you unimpressively.

“...A History of Inazuma: Volume 2...” you meekly replied, slowly realizing that he actually heard you praising him.

“You’re in the wrong section,” the exasperated sigh he gives out causes you to wince, and you turn away back to the bookshelf as if to shield you from all this embarrassment.

“If it’s about Inazuma, you should just be asking me,” you blink as your peripheral catches sight of an outstretched hand. You tilt your head to see that he’s offering his hand, but his face is blank.

“...Well? Come on. I don’t have all day,”

You bite your lip to keep yourself from smiling, something about the way he said it sounds threatening, but also slightly playful. But that’s just the way he was.

You accept his hand, and he pulls you up easily.

Xiao

“Oh so that’s why you’re coming over more frequently...” (Your friend) grins, and you wave your hands around to tell them to quiet down. Adepti had good hearing after all.

“Well, I’m also coming over cause Verr Goldet needs more help these days in the kitchen. You guys are getting so much customers these days that Yanxiao has a hard time by himself,”

“Uhhuuhhhhhh, sure...was it also Verr Goldet who told you to try and master the Almond Tofu recipe from Yanxiao? Cause you’re awfully hell bent on trying to learn that recipe, according to Yanxiao,”

You fall silent, feeling heat crawling up your neck. “I--” You start, searching for an excuse, but realized there was no escaping this one. “I just want to do something nice for Xiao, that’s all,” you innocently quip. “I...I know I can’t help him much, but maybe just cooking his favourite dish will help, even a little,”

(Your friend) smiles a little, knowing that the adepti probably heard everything. “That’s nice of you, Y/N. You must care about him a lot,”

What he does:

once upon a time he would do absolutely nothing. because getting involved with humans is something he shouldn’t do.

But now he bides his time, and observes if it’s safe to open up.

He wouldn’t outright thank you at first, but he’ll slowly show up in front of you a little more everyday.

He’s rather awkward, so at first he only nods his head as thanks when you leave the bowl of almond tofu on the ledge.

Eventually when he realizes you’re not going to stop cooking for him he goes the extra mile to do something simple for you too.

He places a stalk of your favourite flower on the ledge, right before you come to put down his bowl of almond tofu.

I’ve published The Ruthless Prince (Reader x Scaramouche) on paperback. Check it out here:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0BVD1VVFP

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maeumi-jng · 4 months

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can't stop me.

pairing: enhypen x gn!reader

synopsis: when they tell you they like you and you respond with "can't you stop?" because you're scared to be in a relationship.

warnings: fluff, angsty-ish?, poor humour, skinship

library: enhypen bookshelf

author's note: i got this idea after reading a dialogue prompt and i thought it would work in the world of idols!

heeseung

can't tell if he's dreaming or not– he blinked at you, unable to decipher reality. his eyebrows are scrunched while an incredulous expression falls overs his face. "what do you mean, 'can't you stop?'" this was ludicrous. the strangest thing he had ever heard.

you gave him a pointed look. "you know what i mean."

heeseung poked the inside of his cheek with his tongue. "of course, i can't stop." what a stupid thing of you to say. any hope he had was deflating. his shoulders were slumped and his happy demeanour was fading. he folds his arms before taking a deep breath. "why would i want to stop? i like you. a lot. i don't think i would ever want to stop."

jeez, okay, poet heeseung. "b-but what about your company? your fans?" you asked nervously.

he tilted his head and let out a sigh of relief. he thought you were meaning something else entirely. he stretched his arms and brought them around you, enveloping you into a warm, comforting hug. "real fans will love you. and as for the company, i'll make sure they protect you, okay? no one will invade you or your life, i promise."

your heart warmed at his words. he cared... so much. you held him tighter, pressing a kiss to his cheek. "i love you, hee."

"i love you too, sweetheart."

jongseong

he's the only logical and calm member– he would be like, "okay."

and you would blinked, taken aback. because like what? you weren't expecting the response. you were just trying to offset his feelings because dating someone like jay, as amazing it could be, was a huge risk and step for you. but this was... what you wanted right?

you twiddled your fingers, nodding slowly. "okay then..." you awkwardly said.

to your shock, jay grabbed your hands gently and met your eyes earnestly. "if that's what you want, then i'll respect that. but if it's because you're scared, then i promise i'll do whatever it takes and however long it takes to make you feel safe."

you widened your eyes at his words, feeling small tears line your waterline. how on earth had you been so lucky to meet him out of all the people in the world... you will never know. but you couldn't let the conversation end like this. "jay..." you called softly.

jay hummed in response, mind already busy with what he needs to do.

"i really really like you too," you confessed.

jay paused his pondering. he couldn't believe his ears. you had given it a chance. a wide smile finally spread onto his face and for a moment, all the worry in the world had disappeared into the air. he squeezed your hand after bringing a small kiss to the back of it.

in the end.... a respectful king.

jaeyun

this man is already so clingy. hearing something like this would break his heart! :(

jake wouldn't even understand what you mean and would just get clingier. his eyes would be round with worry and searching your own, his hands would already be out to reach yours. "i... i–what you do you mean? i can't just stop. not when i like you so much. did i," he cleared his throat, "did i do something, perhaps? just tell me and i'll fix it."

you chewed your lip nervously. he was already breaking all the walls you had built up for this conversation. "jake," you whined softly, swinging his hands. "you're making this really hard."

"making what hard, sweetheart? what's going on in that pretty head of yours?" jake queried gently, tucking a tress behind your hair.

christ.

"i'm terrified," you blurted. you took in a sharp breath upon seeing a bit of confusion enter jake's puppy browns. still playing with his fingers, "i just... it's going to be so difficult. us i mean. you're you and i... i'm me. we're so different and the world–"

finally it clicked for jake.

"oh baby," he cooed, bringing you into a tight hug. as he rubbed your back gently, he said, "even if the world was against us, i would be happy that it's you and me in the end. we'll get through anything if it comes up... together, hmm?"

soft cries in the audience for jake ♡︎

sunghoon

bro, if jake didn't understand, this guy is the definition of not understanding.

not only did sunghoon not get it, he refused your answer! "no. i can't stop and i won't. i don't care," he said with the most indifferent tone.

all your worry is put on hold for a brief moment. you blankly look at him. "i... what?" it was all you could say after being so dumbfounded.

"why? why do you want me to stop?" sunghoon asked, hands resting on his hip.

you sucked in a sharp breath. you didn't like where this conversation was going. sunghoon was beginning to sound like your mother and you were slowly slipping into trouble. your eyes darted around your surroundings. "uh, because i don't like you...?"

now sunghoon is like ????????? what's with the question mark at the end?

sunghoon raised a brow, putting his hands on either side of your arms. he looked you dead in the eye. "okay... now tell me that while looking me in the eye."

oh... fuck.

you forcefully planted your eyes onto his. "i... i don't like you," you affirmed with a small nod to hopefully get sunghoon to buy your poorly made lie.

sunghoon was now the one with a blank expression. "you know when you lie, you chew your cheek? you've done it twice now. and you won't me to believe you?"

"sunghoon!" you cried out of frustration. "stop making this harder than it needs to be!"

"that's on you, not me," sunghoon shrugged. you were officially considering smacking him in the head.

"oh my god... do you even really like me, you big phony?" you queried incredulously.

sunghoon dropped his antics and sent you a genuine smile. "more than you'll ever know. so don't be scared and let's face this together, hmm?"

seonwoo

no seonwoo :( he's so sulky and pouty. worse than jake if we're being real.

"ah, what are you talking about? i just told you i liked you! how can i stop?!" he argued, folding his arms and mending his brows in the only way he knew how to express his anger.

you open your mouth to respond but he continues to talk. seonwoo's hands begin to start flailing about. "also why would i stop? how?! you're so... likeable. gosh, everything is so good about you! you're so pretty, so funny, so smart, so talented... and you want me to stop? okay. fine. how about you stop bring pretty and good at everything? hmm? stop making me feel things and making me blush! how about that? huh?"

seonwoo, by now, has run out of steam. he's heavily breathing while lowkey glaring at you for suggesting something so stupid.

and you stand in front of him like, 0_0.

"seonwoo," you started, "i-i just meant... i'm scared for us because of your fans. and i worry for you. i know how you get when there's hate. you pretend it doesn't affect you but you're hurt, which is totally fine but that terrifies and hurts me too. i just wish you shared your problems with me if you felt comfortable enough to."

seonwoo's shoulder dropped at your words. he pursed his lips "oh."

you winced, feeling like you had made things too serious.

"ohhhhhh, that makes sense," he chirped, clapping his ands.

eh? all of a sudden?

seonwoo took a deep breath, calming himself down. he grabbed your hands, covering it with his own. "first of all, i'm so so sorry for worrying you. i promise you, i'll tell you how i'm feeling, hmm? and the fans... who cares? we don't need to care about anyone. just you and me."

jungwon

as the leader, he's used to being put in situations and having to adjust. but this... this puts jungwon off entirely.

because what are you talking about? he had worked up so much courage to tell you he liked you and you were telling him to just stop.

jungwon blinked, trying to process your words. he pressed his lips together, making his dimples pop out. he scratched his forehead. "so let me get this straight... tell me if i'm wrong. but you want me to stop like you? is that right? after i told you i liked you? are... are you okay? are you sick? do you need medicine?"

as humorous as the latter sounded, jungwon was entirely serious. his hand was raised to your forehead, feeling for your temperature. raising a brow, he said, "you don't feel hot..."

"jungwon," you blankly said, hand still on your forehead, "i am perfectly fine," you assured him.

jungwon removed his hand, falling into deeper thought. "then why? i mean, i could try but i'd fail because all i do is think about you. if i'm being honest, trying to stop liking you would be unrealistic and far too difficult for me. and in the most non-offensive way, i think you're lying. this isn't something you want. i know that because i know you like me too."

ah jungwon... always so straightforward. even now, he was making your cheeks flush.

jungwon shoved his hands into the pockets of his jeans. "and if you're scared... i understand."

you lifted your head, eyes widening.

jungwon nodded to himself, realising he had hit the nail on it's head. "i'll give you space, if that's what you want. but i wish you would let me comfort you in these times. i would like to work through these problems with you. i would fight for you in a heartbeat."

jungwonnie ahhhhhh ♡︎

riki

maybe surprising, but despite being the youngest, he's probably the one who understands the most. he's still stubborn, don't get me wrong, but he knows exactly where you're coming from.

his entire career, from the moment he stepped onto i-land, people viewed him strangely. the boy from japan in korea or they saw him in a way that was unbecoming and made him comfortable. his experience with fans was always bittersweet. some enjoyed him for who he was while others were asking marry him when he was still a minor.

either way, riki stands by you like a rock. well, figuratively. he was actually currently sitting beside you in a park. "i'm not going to stop liking you, so you can stop trying to convince me. i'm going to stick by you. what do they say... through thick and thin? for better or for worse... in sickness and health? i'm going to draw boundaries for everyone so don't you worry about those 'fans.'"

at your silence, he turned to you, eye widening upon seeing the unshed tears in your waterline. that was not what he was going. quickly, he stood up from his seat and bent down in front of you. he held one of your hands and used his other to hold your face. "oh my god, i didn't mean to make you cry. i'm so sorry! please, stop. i don't like seeing you cry, especially because of me."

riki furrowed his brows upon hearing you laugh lightly and your body shake. he ducked his head further, trying to get a clear glimpse of your face. "i... you're laughing?" he asked incredulously.

you chuckled softly, putting both of your hands on his face. "riki, you idiot... i'm crying out of happiness. you're so sweet!"

riki's cheeks burned under your hands. he raised a brow, "me? sweet?" he questioned. he shrugged. "i mean i guess i am?" he said nonchalantly, making you hit him playfully.

he smiled, relieved to see you happy once again.

niki 🥹

#maeumi-jng #maeumi jng’s library — enhypen bookshelf ♡︎#enhypen imagines #enhypen fluff #enhypen x reader #lee heeseung x reader #jay x reader #heeseung x reader #jake x reader #sunghoon x reader #sunoo x reader #jungwon x reader #riki nishimura x reader #niki x reader #enhypen reactions #enhypen headcannons

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me-writes-prompts · 5 months

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-:Dying in your lover’s arms prompts:-

(This is so angsty, I'm living on it. TAG ME! This has been in my drafts for months, so there you go)

By @me-writes-prompts

Wrapping the other one in a hug and then falling down to the ground.

Cradling them in their arms, until the other one breathes their last hope.

It starts to rain, and there is blood all over them, but they are kissing the last goodbye.

^^"Don't say goodbye."

"I have to go, love."

"Stay with me. Please."

"Don't. You can't leave me, not now. Not ever."

Confessing their feelings for the other one(even though, not the best time I must say. It still has me crying so)

Sobbing and gently putting their heads together.

Hands reaching out to each other at their last moment

Murmuring 'I love you's repeatedly until their voice is raw and low

"You're so brave, you have to hang on."

"Be strong for me, please."

Holding them so tightly that their bodies are basically glued together

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angelltheninth · 6 months

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#20 Gojo Satoru PLEASE THANK YOU 🥹💞💞💞💞

I'm guessing you want the angsty one right? Cause of... yeah.

Pairing: Gojo Satoru x Fem!Reader

Tags: angst, confession, teasing, kissing, almost death but he's a tough guy

A/N: I've seen Gojo spoilers of course but I won't be making the fic from that scenario just cause I don't want to spoil the specifics of it. Prompt is from this list.

20. Confessing on the verge of death but then not dying

Baffling how Gojo didn't take his injuries seriously when he was literally coughing up blood on the medical bed, it was like this was all a game to him

His eyes were somehow still just as pretty, not a inch of dullness to them despite how heavy his eyelids seemed

You didn't leave his side for a moment, holding his hands, refusing to rest, to leave because this might be the only time you'll get to see him

"If you're here any longer they might think you're in love with me or something." He laughed, even though it hurt, he kept laughing through coughing up more blood and his chest rising and heaving from the coughing fit

You're quick to scold him for joking at a time like this while also not outright denying his claim

After all you thought it was pretty obvious from how you've interacted and looked at him up until this point, so lovestruck that you were willing to withstand his teasing for years with no real results

Gojo presses his lips to your hand when you wipe the blood off, insisting on messing with you till his very last breath, "Can you get my hair out of my eyes, I wanna see you a bit better... it's all... blurry for me." With how much blood he's lost from the mission to getting here it's a wonder he can move at all

"Would it be too much for me to ask something of you?" He smiled at you while asking, and even as tired as he was it was still beautiful, "Since I'm not gonna get another chance, could I get a kiss? It'll be the perfect way to g- ow! What the hell is wrong with you? Hitting a man on deaths door. You could have just said no."

Was this Gojo offering you one final chance because he figured you would never take that step, it would have been a little selfish, asking a dying man for a kiss all for your curiosity and satisfaction

Equally as cruel would be to deny him one final wish

The kiss, while gentle, wasn't anything like a dream like his, he had the coppery taste of blood all over him, his lips bloody and cracked and eyes hazy, barely open, "I really do love you." He whispered right before going into another coughing fit and fainting

For a while you thought you imagined it, and with Gojo being on his literal death bed you didn't think you'd get chance to know the truth

So you choose to tell yourself that it was wishful thinking, that the love of your life confessed to you right before his death

Little did you know it was the truth, something you learned when you got news that while struggling he was still alive but unable to leave the hospital

"Look who came to see me! I'm back from the dead!" He joked the moment he saw you, "Thank you for your kiss of life, sweetheart." Yup, that was Gojo alright

But what stood out to you was the fact that he called you sweetheart so easily, not an ounce of hesitation, despite everyone else also being in the room, not only that but also him mentioning the kiss you had

You were extremely embaressed by this revelation as well as the fact that you actually thought this man would die right after his love confession

#jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk x reader #gojo satoru x reader #gojo x reader #jujutsu kaisen imagines #jjk imagines #gojo satoru imagine #gojo imagine #jujutsu kaisen fanfic #jjk fanfic #gojo satoru fanfic #gojo fanfic #jujutsu kaisen angst #jjk angst #gojo satoru angst #gojo angst

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fanaticsnail · 1 month

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An Affectionate Embrace

Masterlist Here

Characters: Buggy, Mihawk, Crocodile, Shanks, Beckman (Art found on Pinterest)

Word Count: 650-900 per gentleman.

Synopsis: It was a simple reaction, an impulse you felt organic and out of your control. Their cheek was right there, and the swell in your chest and spike of adrenaline prompted you to lunge forward and capture their cheek beneath your lips. How do they react to such a soft touch? Do they shy away, or do they respond in kind?

Notes: Since completing the "Kiss Their Cheek" for both the monster and supernova trios, I had to get a little kiss on the sea-dilfs. Considering they’re a little older and more experienced (and less easy to fluster), there’s a little more depth to their reactions.

Themes: cheek kisses, feelings, unrequited love, confessions of love, no prior romantic relationship, gn!reader, pure fluff, lil bit angsty, small bit of fear, bittersweet emotions.

Tag List: @sordidmusings @since-im-already-here @feral-artistry @writingmysanity @gingernut1314 @i-am-vita @cinnbar-bun @carrotsunshine

Buggy

“Captain, you’re back!” you cried with glee, eagerly rising to your feet alongside the devoted crew. Each member rushed over to greet him, cheers and enthusiastic cries of joy sprang forth from the lips and throats of your comrades in arms.

Buggy D Clown had been away for a while, wandering throughout the seas and attempting to get back to his loyal and faithful crew. You had been searching for him for weeks, and finally at the umpteenth hour, his heavy boots found the deck of the Big Top once again.

As the first member of the crew to reach him, you flung yourself into his arms and littered his face in a flurry of rapid kisses. You adored your captain. All of the crew did. Considering the massive swell and release of emotions, you could barely contain your incessant need to wrap yourself around him and continue laying into him with peppered pecks atop his cheeks, chin, forehead and stubbled jaw.

The rest of the crew joined you in your embrace, each member attempting to get as close as they could to kiss, claw, bow and nuzzle against the captain. Giggling along with them in cheer, you felt Buggy’s expression change from joy and pride into a deep and heavy frown.

“Alright, that’s enough,” Buggy’s low tone attempted to break the crew away from their embrace. None could hear his direction over their own desire to worship their captain with their lips, arms and knees. Kneeling before him and reaching up their grabby hands, uttering “we missed you,” and “we love you, captain,” repetitively, Buggy’s body began to vibrate as his rage ignited.

“That’s enough,” he tried again, the crew not responding to his commands and continuing to mumble, babble and cry for him. You hastily withdrew yourself from his arms, adjusting your clothes and turning to your crew.

“Oi, you lot! Captain said it’s enough!” you called, booming your voice to halt the crew of their incessant repetition. “Hoist the colors, unsheath the sails, weigh anchor: prepare to make waves!”

“Aye,” the crew responded, hastily snapping out of their prior hypnosis and scrambling to follow your commands. Although you were not the first-mate, you were excellent at barking orders to the unruly crew. Turning to glance at the blushed, painted face of your captain, you smiled up and him and clapped a supportive hand over his shoulder.

“It’s good to have you back, sir,” you confessed briefly, turning away to begin your duties to set sail, “Do we have a heading, Sir- Mmfmph!” Buggy’s index finger and thumb collected your chin, hoisting you closer to him as he drew his face closer to meet with yours.

Closing the gap, your captain’s lips collided with your own, his red paint smeared over your lips and cheeks as he pressed a heavy and intentional kisses against your mouth. His hand withdrew from your chin, raking his gloved hand through your hair to draw you into himself.

“S-Sorry, Doll,” he stuttered upon his withdrawal, “It’s been a little while, and I missed you too.” Your eyes held a momentary confusion, your head shaking with a broad rise in your smile.

“You gonna kiss all the crew, Captain?” you laughed joyfully and in good humor, “Am I the lucky number one to receive a kiss from you? You want me to line them up for you, Sir?”

Where you expected to find a loud outrageous cackle at your joke, akin to one that you were always greeted with when you verbally played with your captain, what you found in it’s wake was something different. Buggy’s hands sought out your hips, drawing you closer and pressing his forehead against your shoulder.

“No,” he whispered in a voice so silent you could barely hear it, “Just you.” Reactionary, you wrapped your arms around his neck and soothed over his hair and shoulders with several soothing touches. You felt his anxiety release and his tension depart from him with a shaken movement on his shoulders. The longer he remained nuzzled against you, the more he realized he never wanted to be apart from you again.

Mihawk

The cool steel of metal clashed together, a cross-shaped window crafted between your blades as you bore your eyes into his honey-hue. Mihawk had been training you in the art of the sword, desperate for you to be a well-rounded fighter. You were no swordsperson, only minimal prior skill with a blade meant for single combat.

But Mihawk, the owner of castle Kuraigana and your superior, was a determined teacher.

“This maneuver is called ‘the talking window’,” he informed you, clicking the blade against the sharpened edge of your sword. You nodded as he continued to educate you, “This is where many a swordsman may converse, or threaten their opponent with verbal intimidation.”

Humming in response, he tested the grip on your steel with a firm shove: breaking you from contact against his blade. He lunged forward with his training sword, thrusting it out and prompting you to parry the blow.

“Try again, and see if you can disarm me with a threat while in there,” his authoritative tone almost caught you off guard. “Think on your feet. I’ll grant you a single moment there to test your words. Your job is to have me stumble enough verbally to lose my momentum in combat.”

Picking up your stance, you tapped your sword against his while you allowed your mind to produce witty and original retort. Kicking up your feet and swirling in place, your blade's edge was once again drawn against Mihawk’s as he awaited your verbal disarm.

But there was something about the way he was looking at you. His eyes held encouragement with his usual abrasiveness, a combination you were yet to find in its equal. The hue of amber decorated his honey-irises with the soft swell of the uncharted and unfamiliar. Disarmed yourself by the emergence of new emotions, your body moved against your will and pressed through the window of crossed-blades.

You sprung forward, your lips immediately finding purchase against his whiskered cheek. This small act of pure instinct stunned Mihawk in his stance, his fingers loosening around the hilt of his blade and softening against your sword.

Considering the hastiness of your own actions, you withdrew as quickly as your lips found his cheek. Your own cheeks flooded with warmth, your lips tingling with the lingering glow of the kiss, as you slunk back in your stance. After a few rapid blinks, Mihawk thrust his blade against your own, easily circling his wrist to rid your grasp over the hilt of your sword and dropping it to the ground.

“I-I’m sorry, I just-,” you began, halted by Mihawk casting his own blade down beside yours and lunging forward. He closed the distance, his hands grasping at your hips and drawing your body flush against his own. Pelvises touching, lips within distance, he circled his chin as a snake would mesmerize their unwitting and unsuspecting prey.

“-If you’re going to disarm me with something as bold as a kiss,” Mihawk purred down at you, his gaze holding you hostage under its sultry hypnotism, “Then at least do it properly, for both our sakes.”

“For both our-?” your words halted in your throat as your lips became eclipsed under the soft touch of Dracule Mihawk’s lips against your own. Your eyes widened, his lips opening and molding against yours to find a kiss as deep enough - as passionate enough - to grant you the insight to all of his pent up emotions.

Brows furrowed and hands roaming, he cradled your form against himself, succumbing to the feeling of bliss against your lips as each moment flooded into the next. Finally allowing himself the luxury of opening himself up to this genre of touch, he would never let you go. You were his, and he was yours.

Crocodile

“I have set out three towels, lotions and soaps, alongside an assortment of your usual clothes should you desire them over your current ensemble,” you nodded, gesturing to the broad chest, arms and legs of the once respectable Sir Crocodile.

His hair was greasy, his eyes were sunken, and his shoulders carried a foreign weight you had not expected to find anchoring your former boss to the floor. As Sir Crocodile’s personal assistant, you were privy to witnessing every state he found himself in. All aside from this one.

He was defeated. His spirit was broken alongside the reflective gold of his left hook. The object was littered in scratches and scuff marks, his body fairing not so different under the longevity he served in Impel Down. His eyes followed your gesture, glaring at the assortment of clothes atop the vanity cabinet before floating his eyes up to meet with his reflection within the broad mirror.

Although he was yet to utter a single word to you, his silence depicted the raw emotions swelling within the heart, spirit and soul of Sir Crocodile.

He was not who he once was.

A man broken, clawing and desperate to be freed from the confines of a torturous prison - to battle and grind through the smog of battle to once again be shepherded into your awaiting embrace. His employee, his confidant, his friend - his love. A love he was yet to express due to the nature of your occupation.

He focussed on his sinking eyes, not recognising the figure glancing back at him. His body was marked with the white and black stripes of imprisonment, his mind laying heavily on the way his body was weakened under the sea stone walls, floors and shackles. He couldn’t find his former self amongst the remains of the man he saw in the silvery reflection. Each crease of his crows feet, each silvered hair on his head, each purple circle beneath his eye was a stranger glaring back at him.

“If I may, Sir,” you began, stepping forward and hovering your hands over his shoulders in the reflection. Deciding against your better judgment, you placed your hands firmly upon his shoulders, soothing over the flesh with your thumbs. You felt him sigh into your touch, but not conform, nor fully embrace, your affectionate touch.

“You are strong,” you uttered into his ear, watching his eyes for any indication of discomfort or apprehension. Finding none in its wake, you continued uttering assurances while you caressed his flesh. He sighed into your touch, leaning into each ministration your hands provided him above his prison uniform.

“You have carved your destiny out by tooth and nail, Sir,” you assured him, paying attention to the scruff of his neck: circling your hands to relieve the stress and tension from his rapidly troubled mind, “You are the man you have always been, Sir Crocodile.”

“And who am I, Rouhi?” he whispered through his exhale, lulling his head back to lean into your palms. His eyes were shut, his forehead plagued by the trials he endured at the violent hands of the marines.

You couldn’t help yourself, your heartstrings tugging and pulling you down to press your lips against his cheek. The silvery scar cutting his eyes away from his nose,jaw and lips feeling rough beneath your lips. You allowed yourself a moment to hold him beneath your lips, feeling the tension rapidly leave him the longer you pressed this affectionate expression against his skin.

“You are Sir Crocodile,” you whispered after tearing your lips away from his cheek, “You are an influential threat that can have the world fall to their knees under your power.” Glancing into his eyes, you saw the world within their purple hue. His eyes swelled beneath their heavy torment, searching your own for more than your words had spoken.

“Is that all I am?” he whispered, his heart weighing heavy in his chest as he looked up at you, “Am I nothing more?”

“You are everything to me, Sir,” you confessed, your heart feeling lighter while the adrenaline pumped to flush your cheeks with a darkening heat, “You can take from that confession what you truly desire to make from it. For now: your clothes have been pressed, your towels have been fluffed, and your home has been made ready to receive you-.”

Lips found yours, his affectionate and apprehensive touch hungrily calling for you with each passing moment. He held his lips against you as if it was the only tether holding his form to this earth, his anchor within the harbor of an unknown land of unrestrained affection. Right hand lacing into your hair, his whimpered groan departed his lips and cried lowly into your own.

He was anew. The broken man he once was no longer found purchase within his chest. Whichever destiny he carved for himself, he would have you by his side to hold him accountable and support him in claiming his fate.

Shanks

The air was light, the jovial melodies thrust into the air at the hands of skilled minstrels. You had been dancing all night with your crew, the momentum finally catching up with you as you all found your seats for a momentary reprieve.

A laugh fled your throat as you twirled your body once more as the music decrecendoed. Applauding the talent produced at the hands and lips of the musicians, you turned to face your crew: their bodies claiming each of the empty surfaces deemed appropriate for the body to recline against. No stool, chair, sofa nor benchtop remained unoccupied as the crew found their reprieve from lengthy dancing.

“Why don’t you sit on my lap, love?” your captain chuckled at you, prompting a rise in laughter among the remainder of the crew, including yourself. “I’m far more comfortable than the chairs around here, anyway.”

“How considerate of you, Captain,” you feigned your appreciation, holding your hand to your heart and drawing out each intentional step towards his lap, “Will you wrap your arms-... -pardon, sir. Arm around me as I take my rightful place atop your mighty throne?”

Always playful and light were the interactions you had with your captain. No matter the years that passed in your longevity in servitude aboard the Red-Force, the playful rapport between Shanks and yourself was something ever present.

“I will put my arm wherever you like, love,” he chuckled, his hazelnut eyes beckoning you in as you drew yourself ever closer, “I’ll keep you safe, so long as you feed me my ale and tell me I’m pretty.”

“So pretty, sir,” you laughed down at him, sinking atop his knee while caressing your hand over his cheek, “The prettiest man that ever did live.” As you cooed into his face, you leant down and pressed a lengthy and extravagant kiss atop his cheek, feigning enthusiasm with a vocal moan while smiling.

The crew burst into a large, communal laugh that resonated within the chest of your captain. The teetered chuckles died down as the men found their drinks, your hand clasping around the hilt of Shanks’ ale and elevating it to his lips.

His eyes never left you for a single moment.

Feeling small beneath his gaze, you placed his tankard down against the table and turned to face him with your brows knit into a gruff frown.

“What, Captain?” you asked him, the anxiety elevating in your chest for each moment that continued to pass between you.

“You missed, love,” he chuckled darkly. You were puzzled, searching for a moment in your servitude that you ever missed a single target - falling short in your memories. Before you had an opportunity to ask him a follow up question, you were silenced by Shanks’ right index finger raking along your jaw and collecting your chin within the hooked digit.

“If you’re going to kiss me,” his smirk carried his dangerously playful tone, “Make sure you hit the right target.” He allowed himself to dwell in that moment of teasing, feeling you slink back atop his lap while his eyes held nothing but unbridled affirmation within their hue.

“Now give us a proper kiss, love,” he uttered before dragging your head towards him, his lips meeting your own. The room uproared into a momentary chaos: cheers, hollers and whistles rose amongst the crew the longer you held your lips against Shanks’. He chuckled against your lips, turning his head and humming against your opening mouth.

“There ‘ya go,” Shanks laughed after pulling away, “Lead with that next time, love. Makes it all less confusing for the lot of us.”

But you were left more confused than the moment you kissed his cheek. Did he like you? Did he want more? Did you want more? You would need to discuss this when the both of you find yourselves in an air of sobriety, that was for certain.

Beckman

The storm scattered your face with a flurry of ice-splinters of frozen rain.The Red-Force was stampeding throughout the waves to find refuge in the eye of the storm, your task was to release the sails to have the natural wind pull you toward the calming center of the flurry.

On the last knot set to release the canvas, the sail snagged on the rope against the top-mast: prompting you to sprint towards the ropes to clamber up amongst the havoc. Your feet caught in the ropes, your heart springing to your throat as you readjusted yourself and stabilized your body within your climb.

“Careful up there!” the barked call of the first mate of the Red-Haired crew called to you over the wild and unruly wind. You could barely make out his words, let alone formulate an answer over the swell of rainfall.

Anchoring yourself amongst the ropes, you began desperately tugging at the knot to loosen. Your eyes became misted by the rapid downpour of water, your hands and fingers desperately clawing at the joint fibers of the rope to loosen. As you finally released the last loop of rope amongst the canvas, your feet slipped and your fingers barely brushed with the ropes to hold yourself steady before you began to fall.

The air was cool, the clouds above shepherded you into the lull of calm before you deduced your body would meet firmly against the deck and break your neck on impact. There was no way you would survive such a drop: no Devil-Fruit abilities to caress your fall, nor Haki present to catch you on impact.

Little did you know, the moment Benn Beckman barked his orders: he ensured his body was intentionally beneath yours to collect you in his arms should you fall. Although first mate to captain Shanks of the Red-Hair pirates, you were special to him. He needed to ensure your safety, regardless of his own orders to remain at his post.

As you fell through the air and readied your soul to flee from your body to welcome death with a warm embrace, the only embrace you felt was a warm chest, two steady and firm arms, and an angry reprimand falling from the lips of the gray-haired first mate.

“I told you to be careful!” he barked at you, his eyes wild and frantic as his brow deepened in a low frown. Your breath hitched in your throat, watching as his passionate scolding ignited behind his eyes. “You need to be careful, to be wise. I don’t care what Shanks told you to do, nor how stupid a command it is. You need to be more careful. Hitch a rope around your belt or somethin’, or between each loop to stop you from falling. I can’t lose you to something so stupid as a storm.”

You could barely comprehend his words, each syllable sounding heavenly against your ears as you appreciated each breath you were granted. You expected to die there, to fall from the ropes and have your neck snap upon impact against the deck - littering your skin with splinters from the wood and choirs serenading you into the life thereafter. In its stead, you were met with a grumpy bark and a cool reprimand that had your heart swelling and eyes misting with the rise of emotions.

Without thinking, you lunged forwards in his arms, your lips making contact against his stubbled cheek. You whimpered against his flesh, arms hooking over his neck and brows upturning in appreciation for his care for you. Your emotions spilled over: thanking whichever deity that was watching over you for the opportunity to live to not only serve this crew, but to feel the touch of Benn Beckman beneath your lips while your body remained chaperoned and cradled within his broad arms.

At a small sob escaping from your lips, Beckman’s heart softened. He cradled you against himself further, huffing out a small laugh and allowing you to remain in his arms a moment longer. He had desired this touch from you for some time, but refused to act on it due to your proximity and place amongst the crew should the relationship sour.

“A-Alright, Darlin’. Easy now,” he chuckled, feeling the small quake in your shoulders at the adjustment of your near demise, “Don’t let me get a big head.”

“You just saved my life, Benn Beckman,” you reiterated, tearing yourself away from him to stare up into his silvery eyes, “A kiss on the cheek is hardly a just reward for such a feat.” Holding his eyes against yours, the rain began to settle as the clouds departed in the eye of the storm. The sun's rays flittered down and cascaded over your bodies, the storm finally finding solace and breaking its tyrannical attack against the Red-Force.

After the storm settled, the soothing swell of waves held you in a momentary calm as your head reclined against Benn Beckman’s broad shoulder. Sitting on the damp deck, with a plush blanket wrapped around your shoulders, Beckman’s lips found your forehead as your eyes grew heavy with want and soothed within the proximity against your valiant savior.

You could not stop staring at him: this burly man with the grumpy twinkle in his eye. You would offer him the world should he ask it of you, grant him every desire his heart would swell for. You had no idea that the desire itself was you until he made that fact abundantly clear upon your wake in the morning.

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thinkingaboutjaedyn · 8 days

Text

ex [a.bonmati x reader]

prompt: aitana pushes you away after the break-up, but you want to be more than just past lovers.

author notes: a full fledged fic? who would have thought 🙇🏽‍♀️ anyways this fic is angsty, but i swear it's not anything toxic. enjoy it 💕

playing ex by kiana lede 🎵

hey, hm

we went from 2 am calls to

zero communication, yeah

we spent too long in heaven that

we felt the elevation

just 'cause it's different and

we're not the same

doesn't mean things have to change

i got no trouble with my pride,

got trouble cutting ties

friendship breakups are bone-crushing, worse than actual relationship breakups most of the time. if you knew the moment aitana left out of your place that day meant to the end of a years long friendship, maybe you would have figured it out. aitana was a constant figure in your life since you were only eleven. with you both playing at a youth academy a friendship was bound to emerge and that it did. the spainard should became one of your closest friends as the years went by.

by your late teens, she was basically a part of your family. coming over to your family home almost everyday and even staying overnight when it was too late to make the trip back home. you two watched each other change from awkward eleven year olds to established adults. the bond between you two was special; aitana always said so. you were her bestfriend, her soulmate, practically the love of her life. eventually that deep friendship blurred into something more, but the short spainard didn't address how intimate the friendship has gotten by the time you were both twenty-two, so you didn't either. what's the point of ruining a good thing over feelings you don't even know are repiocated?

when you went overseas to the wsl, aitana was heartbroken. she was planning on confessing to you right on your twenty-third birthday, but no, you just had to take a different direction in your career.

the night before you had to leave for manchester, you and aitana were sitting on the beach. side by side. shoulder to shoulder. it's around nine pm, so time was ticking by. you would have to head home soon to get a good amount of rest for your morning flight and by the silence between aitana and you, she didn't like that fact.

"why are you leaving?" she breaks the silence, mumbling. her head leans over to rest against yours. the question sounds so sad coming from her lips that you almost want to tell you that no, you weren't leaving. weren't leaving barcelona. weren't leaving her. but you couldn't so you just sigh.

"i want to try something new. you know, see a new style of football," you try to explain but the words don't sound that convincing. you didn't add in how you wanted to get away from aitana so you could settle your feelings. you didn't add in the fact your contract was only for a year and a few months, not even the media mentioned the length of your contract with manchester city.

"you can try new things here, no?" aitana leans away before turning her head to look at you. her eyebrows are furrowed; showing the slight annoyance in her mood. "barcelona has been trying new things, so why won't you stay?" she says, no, nearly begs to know.

you interlock your hands with hers. giving them a gentle squeeze before saying, "i swear i want to stay. i would never want to be apart from you, but it's not just that.."

"then what is it? i'll try to fix it, i'll help you fix it. just tell me and we can figure it out. we always do," her eyes glance into yours. the sad pout on her lips makes you want to just cancel your flight and stay here in spain, but you can't so you just pull her into a hug. the tears start to flow from her the moment aitana stuffs her face into your neck. "it feels like i have never been without you.." she cried into your skin. you fight your own tears, rubbing her back gently.

some may say that display of emotion was dramatic, but they just didn't understand how deep you and aitana's friendship went. you two spent nearly every moment together, off the field and on the field. without each other to be physically around all the time, who would fill that empty spot in you two's lives now?

maybe aitana would react to the news better if you confessed your feelings then, but it was too late to even try to in the moment. you just let her cry as you comfort her. inviting her over to your place afterwards to spend one last night together.

when you did come back to barcelona after your contract with manchester city ended, aitana cried again in your arms. this time out of happiness instead of sadness. the spainard became determined to keep you in spain for the rest of your career; she couldn't deal with just facetimes and texts anymore.

the rest of the barcleona team welcomed you back with open arms. teasing you about how you better not leave home ever again. you didn't ever plan to anyway, so you would just joke back.

your plan to leave spain and get over your feelings for aitana was an absolute fail. everytime you heard her voice over the phone your feelings just got bigger. you would rather endlessly want more with her than be away from aitana any longer.

you slip right back into your role in the team and in aitana's life. going over her house after practice everyday, cuddling while watching movies, becoming a great duo on the pitch again, and all the other stuff you two always do. your feelings were still there but you always pushed them away. not wanting to ruin a good thing. you had just got your best friend back.

fast forward to aitana's twenty fifth birthday. the short spainard had a large dinner with her family and her barcelona teammates. afterwards, it was her and you, a little tipsy on the balcony of her apartment. she was getting horribly handsy, but it didn't bother you. people in spain are just naturally affectionate and this was also your bestfriend, your aitana. she could touch you however she liked. it wasn't until she pulled away from you, but not too far, her hands holding onto your hips.

"y/n.." she says softly. looking up at you with a nervous look in her eyes. your heart races at not only how beautiful she looks in that moment, but also the nervousness in her eyes; aitana is never nervous around you. she doesn't have to. you are her bestfriend, her y/n, her rock. she can be whatever she wants around you. however she wants.

"what is it?" you whisper out, moving your hand to push some of her hair behind her right ear. she leans in closer. eyes a little dazed from the wine she drank earlier.

"i like you.. a lot. no, i love you a lot," she says. you chuckle before saying, "of course you do. what would you do without me." your heart races so fast hearing her speak. her words carry a different tone than before when she usually says those three words. why did it feel different now?

aitana pouts before furrowing her brows. obviously annoyed you haven't caught on to the different meaning behind her words. this i love you wasn't the same one she first said back when she was thirteen, when she realized she wanted you to stay around in her life forever as her best friend. this was more than that. "no.. i love you. i just want to kiss you.." she says.

you widen your eyes before smiling. aitana actually returned your feelings? before you can fully react she pulls you into a kiss. too impatient to hear your verbal response. the kiss is pretty messy with aitana being drunker than you, but still you savor it. your first kiss with aitana is worth remembering.

when she pulls away she pouts away, "i didn't ask you if you liked me back or if you even wanted a kiss." you giggle and peck the pout off of her lips, "of course i like you back."

after that you two got together. your relationship didn't feel that different though, just with more kisses and more than before. whenever you got jealous you actually had the right to act on it. there were many perks that came along with being consider aitana's girlfriend rather than just her best friend. however there were some setbacks as well.

you realized people were right when they said just because someone is a good friend, doesn't mean they would be a good girlfriend. not to say aitana was a bad girlfriend, but she struggled to understand why you would get jealous when she would be incredibly touchy with others. she didn't want to reveal your relationship to the public, perfectly fine with only the people in you two's personal life knowing about the change between you. which wasn't so bad until you see how many people think she's dating someone else and have to fight the urge to post about how she's yours. she was the worse at arguments. quicker to do the silent treatment than to try to work anything out. it was a bad habit from your friendship that you knew she had and just dealt with because she was your bestfriend, you knew how to get around it, but in a relationship with her you didn't want to. you wanted to communicate like a healthy couple should.

everything came to a head a few days after your twenty-sixth birthday. almost a year after aitana confessed to you.

the barcelona team have dragged you out for a good time in the club since your birthday was on a match-day, meaning you couldn't go out like you wanted to. aitana was clinging to you the entire night until she was swept away by some blonde stranger.

you were sipping on your drink, a glare directed right at the blonde whose hands were on your girlfriend as they danced. why did you let her pull aitana away again? because your feet were hurting? yeah well now your heart was. when you finally had enough at the sight of that stranger moving her hands down from aitana's waist to her hips, you pull her away. ignoring the spainard's complaints as you pull her all the way outside. quick to take your jacket off to make sure she didn't feel cold in the paris winds; you may be annoyed at her, but you still love her.

"why were you letting her be all over you?" you want to shout badly, but instead just talk calmly. not wanting to draw attention to the fact two barcelona players were outside about to argue.

"it was just a dance, amor."

"it wasn't just a dance. she obviously wants you," you grab onto her arm, holding in a soft grip before saying, "why can't you act like you have a girl? that you aren't single."

aitana frowns hearing your words. where was this coming from? she quickly tries to deny your statement, "i do. it was never going to go further than dancing."

"that was already too far."

"then why didn't you say anything?"

"why should i have to? you should know that nobody would be fine with some woman dancing with their girlfriend like that!" you say in a hushed tone. pulling aitana closer so that nobody would hear the conversation between you two. the confused look on aitana's face makes your heart hurt. why didn't you communicate your feelings? you always hated how she goes straight to silent treatment, but you go straight to being angry every single time.

"you have never been angry about this before," she replies. fighting the instinct in her to just shut down and go back into the club. she can't even if she wanted to with you holding onto her.

"before what? before this situation or before we got together? i'm not just your bestfriend anymore, i'm your girlfriend, act like it!" you finally let out all the frustration from previous times where aitana just didn't get it. aitana glares at you before shaking her head. "don't tell me what to do. don't yell at me! yes, you're my girlfriend and i'm yours but you don't control me. i'm an adult, so treat me like it!" she argued back. pulling herself out of your grasp harshly before rushing back into the club. leaving you by herself outside.

aitana ignored you for nearly two days. it felt like a year with no texts from her, no calls her, and her refusing to hang out with all the other barcleona players who went to brunch right after the night at the club. even when you all went on the plane to head back to spain, she sat next to alexia. sleeping the entire flight away and being the first to get off. you knew you screwed up and it was your entire fault for her behavior even if it wasn't the healthiest. you should have communicated better even with your frustration.

finally when the silence all got too much, you went over to aitana's apartment. it only takes two knocks for aitana to open up. she sighs once she sees it's you, but doesn't turn you away. instead letting you inside silently. walking over to her couch while you slip your shoes off at the door. your eyes noticing your jacket from the night at the club hanging on a hook near the door.

"aitana.." you move over to the couch, sitting beside her with some space left between you two. she scoots closer which is a good sign that the anger from before isn't still present, but still the silence made you nervous.

"aitan-" you don't get to finish your sentence before aitana speaks. "i'm sorry.." she says with her head down, "i get what you were saying that night. i shouldn't had let her just be all over me and at the time i didn't understand, but after thinking about it, you're right. i'm so used to thinking about you as my bestfriend rather than my girlfriend that i overstep."

the genuine regret in her voice makes you want to reconsider the reason you came over here; to break up with aitana. it has been on your mind for a while now, but that day in paris was just the last push you needed to go through with it. that's not the only reason you're here though. you wanted to come check up on aitana and make sure your words didn't hurt her too deeply, you still love her but it feels like you're slowly falling out of love with her.

"aitana, listen. i love you, okay?" you smile when she lifts her head up. a happy look on her face as she listens to you. "it's just.. i don't think we were meant to be more than best friends. you're my world i swear and i love you but not like this.. anymore," aitana's face immediately drops after you finish speaking.

when she saw you at her door she thought, yes, i could fix it but instead this visit is just the death to the relationship she's been craving from you for a while now.

"so you want to break up? why..?" aitana's voice cracks, "why are you leaving me again? i don't get it."

tears start to flow from her eyes before she could stop them. this break up reminds her of when you left for manchester; she felt like she lost you. now she's losing you again.

you sit there awkwardly, not knowing what to say. seeing aitana cry makes you cry as well. you pull her into a hug that she accepts quickly; even when you're breaking her heart, she clings to you. as her bestfriend you have always been her source of comfort, but now you're her source of pain as well. a condiaction that she's not willing to think about.

for the rest of the night, aitana clings to you. not allowing you to do anything without her by your side and eventually you two fall asleep in her bed. with her face nuzzled into your neck, her arms wrapped around your waist, her legs tangled with yours.

the next day you didn't leave her apartment until three in the afternoon. aitana almost begged you to stay, but she just lets you leave. she loves so much that she will respect your choices and if that means breaking up than she will respect that.

after the break-up, it's like aitana continued on the silent treatment. hardly replying to your texts or answering your calls, she stopped sitting by you everywhere, no more cracking jokes while in the locker room, she just disappeared from your life. it was just like when you left for manchester expect that she didn't try to stay connected.

and you understand why, you would never hate her for it. she's trying to get over you and can't do that if you two are acting like the closest people ever but still it hurts. hurts so bad. you have never been without aitana since you were eleven years old. she was always there, being her cute self. and now she's gone; it feels like your world is collapsing.

you may have broken up with aitana, but you still love her. you're just not in love with her.

you want your best friend back.

i don't wanna be your ex

we way too good at being friends

can we still hangout

on the low, get wild

i don't wanna be your,

i don't wanna be your

hit ya girl up with a text,

when you're alone and feeling stressed

i don't gotta be in love with you, to love you

i don't wanna be your, so

don't treat me like your

e-e-e-e, e-e-ex

i don't want to be your

e-e-e-e, e-e-ex

without aitana, you felt lonely. you have tons of friends outside of aitana of course. you're close with all of your fellow barcelona teammates and have made a reputation of being friends with many other women footballers. then there are your childhood friends from your schooldays that you cherish with your entire spirit. but none of them could compare to aitana. she has been and still is your number one.

all those nights where you held eachother, the daily ice cream trips you two would go on, the endless movie nights could never be replaced by anyone else. it just wasn't the same.

the rest of the barcelona team realized you two broke up as the days went past. when aitana who would usually jump up at the first opportunity to pair up with you for training exercises instead choose to pair up with ona, everyone knew something was up. their suspicions were confirmed when you left before aitana. unlike before when aitana and you would leave together, either going to get food together or going home together.

nobody wanted to be one to ask the question they knew the answer to, so everyone acted like everything was fine. aitana and you still connected on the pitch, but off of it that connection was dead and cold.

aitana wasn't doing any better than you mentally. she felt alone, even when she was hanging out with alexia or ingrid. her mind always drifted back to you, but the hurt you caused to her heart makes her want to resent you. to punish you for leaving her. she's know this is unreasonable, childish, and partially true because you love her.

aitana knows you love her dearly, she can see it in your eyes but it isn't the love she holds for you. it's just as deep, just as intimate, just as special but not romantic anymore and that kills her.

her own romantic feelings were slowly fading though and the yearning for you was getting stronger. not as her girlfriend, but as her bestfriend. she's used to waking up to either you cuddling her or a text from you saying good morning. now she has neither, she hates that. she wants you, but feels too stubborn to do it just yet.

whenever aitana felt down, she would go through you two's messages. her mood getting better just thinking about all the moments attached to the texts. she scrolls through her photos of you, trying not to just call you and hear your voice. she craves you deeply, but won't let you know.

a month passed then two then three.

aitana ignoring you was becoming old. you want to be back in her life, you need to be. she's your soulmate; has been since you were both eleven. a life without her doesn't sound right, so you become determined to make her come back to your arms. seeing aitana be so loving to everyone else while giving you the cold shoulder was incredibly annoying and heartbreaking.

you aren't sure on how to get aitana to pay attention to you. she seemed set on ignoring you for the rest of you two's careers, but you weren't going to allow that.

one day you just decide to take a leap of fate by calling her. the phone rings for so long you almost think she isn't going to answer, but she does. aitana doesn't say a thing, but you can tell she's on the other line. her breathing clear as day.

"tana..?" you say softly, slightly nervous. it feels strange to feel nervous when talking to aitana. it reminds you of the first time you two met as children. feeling too shy to speak to the talented eleven year old that was aitana. she took the first step by handing you a freezepop after practice one day, scooting closer to you before eating her one. you felt it in your spirit that she was made to be your bestfriend then.

"yeah?" she replies. her tone not being venomous like you thought it would be.

"can we hang out or just talk? i miss your voice.."

"but you hear my voice everyday, no?" aitana jokes. you roll your eyes at quick she is to make the conversation light, but it's an endearing trait you love about her. quickly she gets more serious, "why? why would you want to be around your ex?"

you groan at hearing the word ex escape her mouth. in your mind that small relationship was just a chapter in your friendship with aitana, not anything that holds any impact. you want her to think of you as her best friend, not her ex.

"because you aren't just my ex, aitana. you're my best friend and i can't stand another day without spending time with you," you say. aitana goes silent on the other line. her silence makes you frown; was she going to grow angry that you aren't fully acknowledging the fact the feelings between you two were very much real?

it takes a minute but aitana eventually says, "i miss you too. can i come see you..?"

the smile on your lips was probably the warmest you have ever smiled. "yeah. let's meet at that ice cream shop, you know, the one we always go to," you say. aitana hastily agrees before hanging up.

you couldn't wait to see her.

let's skip the awkward run-ins, or

pretending like we're strangers

and get back to how we started, yeah

don't pour water on fire

just 'cause it's different and we're not the same

doesn't mean things have to change

i got no trouble with my pride,

got trouble cutting ties

seeing the familiar ice cream shop that aitana and you have been regulars at since you were eleven brings back the best memories. the first time you two became super close, the first time aitana comforted you, the first time you and aitana considered eachother bestfriends. it all rushes back as you walk through that simple white door where the paint has been peeling off for years now, but nobody ever fixes it.

you arrive twenty minutes before aitana is supposed to meet you here, wanting to have some time to breathe and figure out what to say. this would be the first time talking face to face where you weren't saying soccer related things in three months.

"been missing you," the old lady behind the counter, esperanza, says. she's been here since forever. you don't remember a moment where she wasn't working the counter. she knew all of you and aitana's favorites.

"missed you more. sorry for not coming around as much," you say. happily accepting the vanilla ice cream she hands you. esperanza doesn't let you pay, saying it's on the house since she's been missing you.

"it's okay. where is your little friend?" she questions. you just shrug before shaking your head, "she's coming. she would never miss seeing you."

esperanza chuckles at that before gesturing for you to go sit down, so your ice cream wouldn't melt. you sit at one of the tables near the window. the shop wasn't huge, but it was homey. with various decorations that have been up since you first came here. everything was same it felt like expect for the relationship between aitana and you. the rest of your lives seem to be frozen in time while the friendship between you two was speeding past.

you look out the window, thinking about what to say. would aitana even show? hopefully, she isn't the type to just blow someone off even when angry. she cares about others time. your question is answered when aitana passes by the window before coming through the door.

"hi esperanza! i have missed you, you know," she says with a huge smile on her face. not even noticing you near the window as she comes over to the counter. it isn't until she finishes her conversation with esperanza and gets her strawberry flavored ice cream before she spots you. turning to see you at the window. the way her body tenses makes you cringe; is this how everything is going to be for now on?

you stand, half eaten ice cream in hand, and walk out of the shop. why were you moving away from her like she's some stranger? you couldn't help yourself, seeing her stand there awkwardly makes you want to scream. however you don't go far. sitting down on the pavement in front of the shop; this street doesn't allow cars and it wasn't really busy on thursdays, so there was no one to bother you or spot a top footballer sitting outside of some quaint ice cream shop.

aitana is still standing in the shop. frowning as she looks out the window and see you just sitting there on the pavement, like you always do when it's too hot to stay inside of the shop, but you weren't out there because of the heat this time around. it was because of her.

she didn't mean to just fall silent once she saw you. aitana had so much to say, but hardly the words to express it. seeing esperanza than you seriously brighten up her day that she froze up a bit. hopefully you won't shut her out.

"go talk to her. she misses you," esperanza says, leaning against the counter. before aitana can question her words, esperanza says, "i'm an old woman. i know these things. do you know how many people come in and out of here with love stories? she loves you. talk to her and make whatever this is right. you guys almost made my shop chillier than the ice cream."

esperanza's words make aitana really realize she wants to make this right. her feelings for you were still lingering in her mind, but she could care less; she needs to talk to you.

aitana walks out of the ice cream shop. sitting down right next to you on the pavement, shoulder to shoulder. your ice cream is completely gone by now, aitana takes that as an opportunity to start up a conversation. "you just couldn't wait?" she jokes, gesturing to your hand that had a lack of an ice cream cone in it.

you look at her in confusion before giggling loudly. "not my fault that you are such a slow eater," you joke back. pointing to her strawberry ice cream that was half melted by now. aitana tries to eat the rest of her ice cream quickly, but that doesn't really help as her ice cream melts away.

you two fall back into your roles. easily getting comfortable again despite the obvious conversation that needs to be had. you want to bring up what happened, but can't, worried that it will ruin the atmosphere between you. aitana seems to worry about the same thing as she says nothing about it, but that doesn't you two don't enjoy yourselves and sorta apologize in your own little ways.

aitana brings up how you know she can be really stubborn sometimes as a joke and you easily tease her about it before she teases you about your anger issues.

you two don't get to fully apologize that day, but you do rekindle a friendship that almost went stale.

i don't wanna be your ex

we way too good at being friends

can we still hangout

on the low, get wild

i don't wanna be your,

i don't wanna be your

hit ya girl up with a text,

when you're alone and feeling stressed

i don't gotta be in love with you, to love you

i don't wanna be your,

so don't treat me like your

e-e-e-e, e-e-ex

i don't want to be your

e-e-e-e, e-e-ex

don't act like i don't care for you

cause you know i'd always be there for you (oh)

don't act like i don't care for ya

cause you know i'd always be there for you

i don't want to be your ex

we're way too good at being friends

can we still hangout on the low get wild

i don't want to be your, i don't want to be your

i don't wanna be your ex

we way too good at being friends (yeah)

can we still hangout

on the low, get wild

i don't wanna be your, i don't wanna be your

hit ya girl up with a text,

when you're alone and feeling stressed

i don't gotta be in love with you,

to love you (love you)

i don't wanna be your, so

don't treat me like your

e-e-e-e, e-e-ex

i don't want to be your

e-e-e-e, e-e-ex

i don't want to be your

e-e-e-e, e-e-ex

it takes a while for aitana and you to fully become comfortable with eachother. you two start to hang out more outside of soccer just like before; visiting that same ice cream shop nearly everyday.

those unsaid feelings still hang in-between you two, but you refuse to be the one to address them. even though you said you would fix it, if things are going well, why mention it? you were afraid of ruining what aitana and you have again. running around the topic wasn't doing either of you favors either. you couldn't bring up new crushes like you used to because you didn't know if aitana had moved on fully yet.

aitana was having a mental challenge of her own; she wanted closure. the break up to her felt so sudden that she had no time to process it even when she spent months not talking to you. during those months all she did was yearn for you, so it wasn't that beneficial. her feelings for you had definitely faded into something small; aitana will probably always like you in that way for a tiny amount but the platonic love she has for is even stronger. she just wants to be apart of your life as your best friend. the one you can always trust.

how can she get to that point fully if she doesn't express how she's feeling? aitana ponders about this for nearly five days. the question becoming larger and larger in her head everytime she saw you until she had to say something.

"y/n, want to come over to my place today?" aitana asks as you two walk around on the practice field. she's holding her waterbottle in one hand and yours in the other. you shrug before saying, "what do you think?"

right after practice you two go to aitana's apartment. she convinces to hold her bag all the way up to her apartment floor, reminding you that she held your waterbottle earlier. you jokily grumble about how you will never let her do something for you again. the atmosphere between you is light for nearly a full hour. aitana makes a large salad for you too even though you begged for her to add chicken pieces in it; she refused.

"tana, stop," you groan softly. your eyebrows furrowed together as you push her with your shoulder. currently you are trying to beat her in fifa, but she's been distracting you the entire game. laughing loudly during a game should be a crime with how loud aitana can be when she wants.

"but y/nnn. i wanna win," she giggles. pushing you back which lets her win the game. you roll your eyes, setting your controller down on her coffee table. mentally you remind yourself to tickle her for revenge later on. suddenly as aitana sets down her controller, the air around you two feel so serious.

she gives you a nervous glance, you thought you two were over this awkward phase? why is she acting so nervous now?

aitana grabs onto your hand before resting her head against your shoulder. you rest your head against hers, squeezing her hand gently to let her know to not be nervous. "i have something to say.." she says. you let out a sigh; now it's your turn to be nervous.

"why did you break up with me? i just want to know.." she trails off, glancing at you to see your reaction. why does it feel like you two are walking on eye shells around eachother? it's annoying.

you sigh before saying, "because i realized we weren't meant to be more than bestfriends and that's not in a bad way. i love you so much. i can't live without you. when we weren't friends, i lost my mind. all i want in life is to be with you."

aitana stares at you for a moment before smiling, "i love you too. let's promise to never push each other away again?" she holds out her pinky to you. just like back when you two held out your pinkies and promised to be friends forever at eleven. "promise," you say, linking your pinky with hers.

you pull her close into a hug, just relieved you now fully have your best friend back. you may not be in love with her, but you do love her.

#aitana bonmati x reader #aitana bonmati #woso x reader #woso fanfics #fc barcelona x reader

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