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#anger out on noelle and says the most horrible things so she's probably been told that she'll never be enough or keep anyone or really be
bratpacks-aaa · 2 years
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❛                ♡            ❜                ˚        。    ·    closed    starter    for    @killforyou​   .
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love    is    cruel    .    that    much    she    knows    —    that    much    does    not    require    any    surmise    .    patriarch    determining    he    is    not    ready    for    the    responsibilities    that    a    family    ,    a    wife    who    possessed    an    adoration    to    the    point    of    willing    to    deconstruct    terra    firma    itself    for    him    &    a    saccharine    baby    girl    with    rotund    apples    of    cheeks    ,    is    cruel    (    finding    out    he    has    made    a    new    life    for    himself    on    first    born's    fifteenth    birthday    is    ,    as    well    .    she    is    not    known    for    hating    other    corporeal    animas    ,    but    there    is    a    girl    out    there    who    has    the    felicitous    family    noelle    craves    &    she    cannot    help    the    way    she    wishes    it    was    her    who    had    been    left    behind    )    cruel    is    matriarch    taking    out    the    leftover    ire    from    husband's    abandonment    on    adolescent    who    returns    home    late    one    night    ,    gripping    tow    –    headed    blonde    tresses    ,    once    delicate    (    had    mother    ever    been    delicate    with    daughter    ?    had    noelle    always    received    this    treatment    ?    she    could    not    tell    ,    proceedings    blurring    into    convoluted    chaos    )    palm    striking    countenance    so    harsh    ,    vats    of    concealer    is    applied    when    aurora    breaks    .    cruel    is    this    moment    ,    football    stadium    fluorescents    &    waxing    crescent    moon    blending    as    one    ,    fabricating    dyad    even    when    they    do    not    wish    to    be    ,    articulation    transitioning    from    somber    to    vehemence    rather    instantaneously    .    cruel    is    individual    herself    —    had    been    declared    inadequate    since    the    day    she    exited    her    primordial    pool    ,    but    that    does    not    quell    the    eroded    cardiomyctye    ,    nor    does    it    intercept    an    already    calloused    zephyr    becoming    suspended    within    pulmonary    cavity    ,    the    need    to    singe    milky    epidermis    ,    a    tradition    individual    had    adopted    when    the    melancholy    was    too    much    for    lithe    framework    too    carry    on    shoulders    .    doleful    hues    broadening    in    bewilderment    ,    congenitally    roseate    petals    are    parted    ,    encephalon    racing    with    varying    notions    —    what    did    i    do    ?    what    could    i    have    done    differently    ?    what    would    make    him    stay    ?    what    did    i    do    ?    ❛    you    —    i    wouldn't    even    be    that    upset    if    you    had    waited    !    why    did    you    have    to    tell    me    this    now    ?    ❜    it's    a    prevarication    ,    she    knows    that    it    is    —    but    when    words    do    not    descend    from    other's    brims    ,    saline    droplets    begin    to    accumulate    within    waterline    .    cranium    bobbing    from    left    to    right    ,    metacarpus    ascending    to    halt    any    further    damage    .    ❛    good    luck    on    your    game    .    ❜    timbre    is    monotone    ,    appendages    opting    to    maneuver    around    sports    field    ,    despondency    cutting    through    bones    as    linoleum    aperture    displays    a    wash    room    that    is    void    of    any    essence    ,    save    for    femme    &    meilleur    ami    .    phalanges    gripping    at    porcelain    ,    a    whimper    giving    way    to    a    sob    .
#❛    ♡   ❜    ˚  。 ・ ❪       𝐧𝐨𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐞       𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐤.     ❫       ░       𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐨𝐪𝐮𝐲    .#tw / abuse#tw / self harm mention#so i love the way i wrote this first of all!#like i think it was established that they're both cheerleaders and have been since they were little babies! it's something they share with#one another so that is why they're CO CAPTAINS! 🫶🏽#and i think this takes place moments before a super important game with scouts in the crowd so this could not have come at the worst time?#and i have so much i want to say about noelle because i've thought of her so much? >__< i think she will find out she is a lesbian but until#then she puts so much weight on her relationships because she is cassie howard down? she has this desire and need to be loved and the sad#part is she really only feels unconditional love when she's around aubrey and her pas boyfriends who worship the ground she walks on because#she's the sweetest girl ever really? her and zoë are so tied for best girls like she really and truly is season one cassie howard.#but then for reasons beyond her control they all break up with her and seemed so frightened by her and really and truly upset with her but#she doesn't understand why at all and it comes so fucking randomly too which is why she feels so unloved as you can tell by this starter#and her mom being abusive doesn't help at all like noelle was told she wasn't enough since the day she was born and her mom takes all her#anger out on noelle and says the most horrible things so she's probably been told that she'll never be enough or keep anyone or really be#loved and have a long lasting relationship which ellie has taken it in internalized it and really and truly fucking believes that now? >__<#when in all actuality she has someone who loves her so much and nearly kills anyone who stands in her way about her noelle which when you#really think about it noelle coming up to her on her why doesn't anyone love me it's so SAD because aubrey does and she always has!#and i feel like this is by far the worst she's kind of been over this like she was tore up about each guy *yes* but this has been happening#so much it's kind of her breaking point? and he was one of the sweetest most understanding guys she ever really dated so like listen listen.#in some ways you could say that noelle *loved* him and when she experiencing those feelings of love she doesn't shy away from it because she#knows what it is like to feel unloved and like no one on planet earth cares so when she feels that love she shows it off screams it to every#single person she knows even gets the shit tatted! so this npc boyfriend probably has the worst injuries aubrey has *ever* inflicted?#eee i'm already invested! 🤍🤍🤍 so excited for my aubelle we love you aubelle! 🥹🥹🥹
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